1 00:00:02,222 --> 00:00:04,742 [ Rock Band Warming Up ] 2 00:00:14,982 --> 00:00:17,822 [ Man ] Okay, guys, here we go. Here we go. 3 00:00:17,942 --> 00:00:19,862 One, two-- 4 00:00:20,022 --> 00:00:21,862 One, two, three-- 5 00:00:21,942 --> 00:00:25,342 [ Rock ] 6 00:00:25,502 --> 00:00:28,262 It's been one week since you looked at me 7 00:00:28,382 --> 00:00:30,262 Cocked your head to the side and said I'm angry 8 00:00:30,382 --> 00:00:32,182 Five days since you laughed at me saying 9 00:00:32,342 --> 00:00:34,382 Get that together come back and see me 10 00:00:34,502 --> 00:00:36,302 Three days since the living room 11 00:00:36,422 --> 00:00:38,302 I realised it's all my fault but couldn't tell you 12 00:00:38,462 --> 00:00:40,222 Yesterday you'd forgiven me 13 00:00:40,342 --> 00:00:42,542 But it'll still be two days till I say I'm sorry 14 00:00:42,622 --> 00:00:44,982 Hold it now and watch the hoodwink as I make you stop, think 15 00:00:45,142 --> 00:00:47,622 You'll think you're looking at Aquaman l summon fish to the dish 16 00:00:47,742 --> 00:00:50,662 Though I like my Chalet Swiss l like the sushi 'cause it's never touched a frying pan 17 00:00:50,782 --> 00:00:53,302 Hot like wasabi when I bust rhymes Big like Leann Rimes 18 00:00:53,462 --> 00:00:56,302 Because I'm all about value Bert Kaempfert's got the mad hits 19 00:00:56,422 --> 00:00:58,822 You try to match wits You try to hold me but I bust through 20 00:00:58,902 --> 00:01:00,822 Gonna make a break and take a fake l'd like a stinkin' achin' shake 21 00:01:00,942 --> 00:01:02,982 I like vanilla It's the finest of the flavours 22 00:01:03,102 --> 00:01:04,902 Gotta see the show 'cause then you'll know the vertigo is gonna grow 23 00:01:05,022 --> 00:01:07,342 'Cause it's so dangerous you'll have to sign a waiver 24 00:01:07,462 --> 00:01:10,702 [ Hard Rock ] 25 00:01:10,862 --> 00:01:14,742 I don't give a damn 'bout my reputation 26 00:01:14,902 --> 00:01:17,462 You're livin' in the past It's a new generation 27 00:01:19,822 --> 00:01:23,662 A girl can do what she wants to do and that's what I'm gonna do 28 00:01:23,742 --> 00:01:26,542 And I don't give a damn 'bout my bad reputation 29 00:01:28,662 --> 00:01:30,702 - Oh, no - No, no, no, no, no, no 30 00:01:30,862 --> 00:01:33,262 - Not me - Me, me, me, me, me, me 31 00:01:33,422 --> 00:01:37,742 And I don't give a damn 'bout my reputation 32 00:01:37,902 --> 00:01:41,342 Never said I wanted to improve my station 33 00:01:41,462 --> 00:01:44,342 And I'm only doing good when I'm having fun 34 00:01:44,462 --> 00:01:46,702 And I don't have to please no one 35 00:01:46,862 --> 00:01:50,382 - And I don't give a damn 'bout my bad reputation - Hey ! 36 00:01:50,542 --> 00:01:53,142 - Oh, no - No, no, no, no, no, no 37 00:01:53,302 --> 00:01:55,542 - Not me - [ Computer Keys Clacking ] 38 00:01:55,662 --> 00:01:58,862 I'll be right with you. 39 00:02:09,142 --> 00:02:12,942 So, Cameron. Here you go. 40 00:02:13,062 --> 00:02:16,462 Nine schools in ten years. My, my. Army brat ? 41 00:02:16,582 --> 00:02:19,022 - Yeah. M-My dad is, uh-- - That's enough. 42 00:02:20,822 --> 00:02:23,902 I'm sure you won't find Padua any different than your old schools. 43 00:02:24,022 --> 00:02:27,902 Same little ass-wipe shit-for-brains everywhere. [ Chuckles ] 44 00:02:28,022 --> 00:02:33,582 Excuse me ? Did you just say-- Am I in the right office ? 45 00:02:33,702 --> 00:02:36,342 Not any more, you're not. I've got deviants to see and a novel to finish. 46 00:02:36,462 --> 00:02:38,422 Now, scoot. Scoot ! 47 00:02:38,582 --> 00:02:40,942 Okay. [ Clears Throat ] 48 00:02:41,022 --> 00:02:43,902 Thanks. Thanks a lot. 49 00:02:46,582 --> 00:02:48,462 Patrick Verona. 50 00:02:48,582 --> 00:02:51,022 l see we're making our visits a weekly ritual. 51 00:02:51,182 --> 00:02:54,302 Only so we can have these moments together. Should l, uh, hit the lights ? 52 00:02:54,462 --> 00:02:57,062 Oh, very clever, kangaroo boy. 53 00:02:57,182 --> 00:02:59,742 Says here you exposed yourself in the cafeteria ? 54 00:02:59,862 --> 00:03:02,542 l was joking with the lunch lady. It was a bratwurst. 55 00:03:02,622 --> 00:03:05,582 Bratwurst ? 56 00:03:05,702 --> 00:03:07,982 Aren't we the optimist ? 57 00:03:10,182 --> 00:03:13,622 Next time, keep it in your pouch, okay ? 58 00:03:13,742 --> 00:03:15,542 Scoot ! 59 00:03:28,582 --> 00:03:30,942 Hello ! Michael Eckman. I'm supposed to show you around. 60 00:03:31,062 --> 00:03:33,142 Oh, hi. Thank God. You know, uh-- 61 00:03:33,302 --> 00:03:36,782 - Normally they send down one of those audio visual geeks. - No, I do. 62 00:03:36,902 --> 00:03:39,182 - I know what you mean. - Hey, Michael, where should l put those slides ? 63 00:03:39,302 --> 00:03:43,502 Michael ? So, uh-- Cameron. 64 00:03:43,582 --> 00:03:47,502 Here's the breakdown. Over there, we've got your basic beautiful people. 65 00:03:47,582 --> 00:03:50,822 Now listen. Unless they talk to you first, don't bother. 66 00:03:50,902 --> 00:03:53,662 - Wait. ls that your rule or theirs ? - Watch. Hey, there. 67 00:03:53,822 --> 00:03:56,102 - Eat me. - You see that ? 68 00:03:57,942 --> 00:03:59,742 - To the left, we have the coffee kids. - [ Coffee Spilling ] 69 00:03:59,902 --> 00:04:02,142 - That was Costa Rican, butthead ! - Very edgy. 70 00:04:02,302 --> 00:04:04,062 Don't make any sudden movements around them. 71 00:04:04,182 --> 00:04:06,542 These delusionals are your white Rastas. 72 00:04:06,702 --> 00:04:08,982 They're big Marley fans. They think they're black. 73 00:04:09,142 --> 00:04:11,182 - Semi-political, but mostly-- - Smoke a lot of weed ? 74 00:04:11,302 --> 00:04:14,102 - Yeah. These guys-- - Wait, wait. Let me guess. Cowboys ? 75 00:04:14,262 --> 00:04:17,142 Yeah, but the closest they've come to a cow is McDonald's. 76 00:04:17,262 --> 00:04:20,582 [ Chuckling ] McDonald's. 77 00:04:20,702 --> 00:04:23,902 These are your future MBAs. We're all lvy League accepted. 78 00:04:24,062 --> 00:04:25,822 Yuppie greed is back, my friend. 79 00:04:25,942 --> 00:04:28,502 - Hey, guys, how you doin' ? - Close it, Bogey ! 80 00:04:29,942 --> 00:04:32,702 - Yesterday, I was their god. - What happened ? 81 00:04:32,822 --> 00:04:36,302 [ Sighs ] Bogey Lowenstein started a rumour that l-- 82 00:04:36,462 --> 00:04:39,542 that I buy my lzods at an outlet mall. 83 00:04:39,702 --> 00:04:42,382 - So they kicked you out ? - Hostile takeover. But don't worry. 84 00:04:42,502 --> 00:04:45,262 - He'll pay. Now, over here-- - Oh, my God. 85 00:04:53,262 --> 00:04:56,342 - What group is she in ? - The ''don't even think about it'' group. 86 00:04:56,502 --> 00:05:00,302 - That's Bianca Stratford. She's a sophomore. - I burn, I pine, I perish. 87 00:05:00,462 --> 00:05:03,662 Of course you do. You know, she's beautiful and deep. 88 00:05:03,742 --> 00:05:05,582 I'm sure. 89 00:05:05,702 --> 00:05:08,142 Yeah, but see, there's a difference between like and love. 90 00:05:08,262 --> 00:05:11,822 Because I like my Skechers, but I love my Prada backpack. 91 00:05:11,942 --> 00:05:13,982 But I love my Skechers. 92 00:05:14,142 --> 00:05:17,342 - That's because you don't have a Prada backpack. - Oh. 93 00:05:18,902 --> 00:05:21,662 Listen, forget her. lncredibly uptight father. 94 00:05:21,822 --> 00:05:25,022 And it's a widely known fact that the Stratford sisters aren't allowed to date. 95 00:05:25,142 --> 00:05:27,542 Uh-huh. Yeah. 96 00:05:27,702 --> 00:05:29,462 - Whatever. - [ Bell Rings ] 97 00:05:30,382 --> 00:05:33,062 [ Chattering ] 98 00:05:35,902 --> 00:05:39,422 Okay, then. What did everyone think of The Sun Also Rises ? 99 00:05:39,582 --> 00:05:42,862 l loved it. He's so romantic. 100 00:05:42,942 --> 00:05:45,062 Romantic ? Hemingway ? 101 00:05:45,142 --> 00:05:47,902 He was an abusive, alcoholic misogynist who squandered half his life... 102 00:05:48,022 --> 00:05:50,382 hanging around Picasso trying to nail his leftovers. 103 00:05:50,502 --> 00:05:53,622 As opposed to a bitter, self-righteous hag who has no friends ? 104 00:05:53,742 --> 00:05:55,982 [ Students Chuckling ] 105 00:05:56,142 --> 00:05:58,622 Pipe down, Chachi. 106 00:05:58,742 --> 00:06:02,622 l guess in this society, being male and an asshole makes you worthy of our time. 107 00:06:02,742 --> 00:06:05,342 - [ Students Groaning ] - What about Sylvia Plath... 108 00:06:05,502 --> 00:06:08,062 or Charlotte Bronte or Simone de Beauvoir ? 109 00:06:08,142 --> 00:06:10,262 [ Panting ] What'd I miss ? 110 00:06:10,382 --> 00:06:13,982 The oppressive patriarchal values that dictate our education. 111 00:06:14,142 --> 00:06:16,622 Good. 112 00:06:16,702 --> 00:06:18,542 - Hey, hey ! - [ Boy ] Mr Morgan. 113 00:06:18,622 --> 00:06:22,542 ls there any chance we could get Kat to take her Midol before she comes to class ? 114 00:06:22,702 --> 00:06:24,662 [ Students Chuckling ] 115 00:06:24,822 --> 00:06:28,982 Someday you're gonna get bitch-slapped, and I'm not gonna do a thing to stop it. 116 00:06:29,142 --> 00:06:31,342 And Kat, I want to thank you for your point of view. 117 00:06:31,462 --> 00:06:34,062 l know how difficuIt it must be for you to overcome all those years... 118 00:06:34,142 --> 00:06:36,742 of upper-middle class suburban oppression. 119 00:06:36,822 --> 00:06:38,782 Must be tough. 120 00:06:38,942 --> 00:06:42,382 But the next time you storm the P.T.A., crusading for better lunch meat... 121 00:06:42,502 --> 00:06:44,262 or whatever it is you white girls complain about, 122 00:06:44,382 --> 00:06:46,942 ask them why they can't buy a book written by a black man ! 123 00:06:47,062 --> 00:06:50,462 - That's right, mon ! - Don't even get me started on you two. 124 00:06:50,622 --> 00:06:52,622 [ Both Mumbling ] 125 00:06:52,742 --> 00:06:56,142 - Anything else ? - Yeah, go to the office. You're pissing me off. 126 00:06:56,262 --> 00:06:59,182 - What ? Mr Morgan-- - Later ! 127 00:07:00,902 --> 00:07:04,462 - [ Scattered Chuckling ] - Wha-- 128 00:07:04,582 --> 00:07:07,782 Undulating with desire, 129 00:07:07,902 --> 00:07:10,542 Adrienne removes her red-- 130 00:07:12,502 --> 00:07:14,742 [ Sighs ] 131 00:07:21,502 --> 00:07:23,622 crimson cape... 132 00:07:23,702 --> 00:07:27,142 at the sight of Reginald's stiff and-- 133 00:07:30,382 --> 00:07:32,182 Judith ! 134 00:07:33,742 --> 00:07:37,022 What's another word for ''engorged'' ? 135 00:07:37,142 --> 00:07:39,222 I'll look it up. 136 00:07:39,382 --> 00:07:41,822 Okay. 137 00:07:41,942 --> 00:07:46,062 - Swollen. Turgid. - Tumescent ? 138 00:07:46,142 --> 00:07:48,782 Perfect. 139 00:07:48,902 --> 00:07:52,462 So, I hear you were terrorizing Mr Morgan's class again. 140 00:07:54,622 --> 00:07:56,462 Expressing my opinion is not a terrorist action. 141 00:07:56,622 --> 00:08:00,222 The way you expressed your opinion to Bobby Ridgeway ? 142 00:08:00,382 --> 00:08:02,742 By the way, his testicle retrieval operation went quite well, 143 00:08:02,902 --> 00:08:04,342 in case you're interested. 144 00:08:04,502 --> 00:08:07,262 l still maintain that he kicked himself in the balls. 145 00:08:07,382 --> 00:08:10,182 The point is, Kat-- 146 00:08:12,262 --> 00:08:15,582 - Cat. - [ Sighs ] 147 00:08:15,702 --> 00:08:17,502 [ Purrs ] 148 00:08:19,262 --> 00:08:21,142 People perceive you as somewhat-- 149 00:08:21,262 --> 00:08:24,902 - Tempestuous ? - ''Heinous bitch'' is the term used most often. 150 00:08:27,622 --> 00:08:30,902 You might want to work on that. 151 00:08:31,062 --> 00:08:32,982 Thank you. 152 00:08:33,142 --> 00:08:35,662 As always, thank you for your excellent guidance. 153 00:08:37,262 --> 00:08:39,982 I'll let you get back to Reginald's quivering member. 154 00:08:41,542 --> 00:08:44,982 ''Quivering member.'' l like that. 155 00:08:45,142 --> 00:08:47,822 Virgin alert. Your favourite. 156 00:08:53,222 --> 00:08:55,822 Ooh. Lookin' good, ladies. 157 00:08:55,982 --> 00:08:58,502 Oh, she's out of reach, even for you. 158 00:08:58,622 --> 00:09:02,262 - No one's out of reach for me. - You wanna put money on that ? 159 00:09:02,382 --> 00:09:04,382 Money, I've got. 160 00:09:04,502 --> 00:09:07,862 - This I'm gonna do for fun. - [ Scoffs ] 161 00:09:09,782 --> 00:09:11,822 - Who's that guy ? - That's Joey Donner. 162 00:09:11,902 --> 00:09:14,342 He's a jerk off, and a model. 163 00:09:14,422 --> 00:09:16,262 - He's a model ? [ Chuckles ] - A model. 164 00:09:16,382 --> 00:09:19,182 Mostly regional stuff, but he's rumoured to have a big tube sock ad coming out. 165 00:09:19,262 --> 00:09:21,142 - Really ? - Really. 166 00:09:25,622 --> 00:09:28,462 Man, look at her. ls she always so-- 167 00:09:28,542 --> 00:09:31,262 - Vapid ? - How can you say that ? She's totally-- 168 00:09:31,382 --> 00:09:33,182 - Conceited. - What are you talking about ? 169 00:09:33,342 --> 00:09:35,502 There's more to her than you think. 170 00:09:35,622 --> 00:09:39,982 Look at the way s-she smiles, and-and look at her eyes, man. 171 00:09:40,142 --> 00:09:43,302 She's totally pure. You're missing what's there. 172 00:09:43,382 --> 00:09:45,982 No, no, Cameron, no. What's there... 173 00:09:46,142 --> 00:09:50,222 is a snotty little princess wearing a strategically planned sun dress... 174 00:09:50,382 --> 00:09:53,422 to make guys like us realise that we can never touch her... 175 00:09:53,542 --> 00:09:56,342 and guys like Joey realise that they want to. 176 00:09:56,502 --> 00:09:59,742 She, my friend, is what we will spend the rest of our lives not having. 177 00:09:59,902 --> 00:10:01,822 Put her in your spank bank, move on. 178 00:10:01,982 --> 00:10:04,782 - Move on. - No, no. You're wrong about her. 179 00:10:04,902 --> 00:10:08,302 l mean, you know, not about the spanking part, but the rest, you're wrong. 180 00:10:08,382 --> 00:10:11,782 All right-- I'm wrong ? You wanna take a shot, be my guest. 181 00:10:11,902 --> 00:10:13,702 She's actually looking for a French tutor. 182 00:10:13,782 --> 00:10:15,702 Are you serious ? That's perfect ! 183 00:10:15,862 --> 00:10:17,822 D-Do you speak French ? 184 00:10:17,982 --> 00:10:19,982 Well, no, but I will. 185 00:10:23,022 --> 00:10:26,422 Hey. Your little Rambo look is out, Kat. 186 00:10:26,542 --> 00:10:30,102 - Didn't you read last month's Cosmo ? - Run along. 187 00:10:33,142 --> 00:10:36,222 l know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, 188 00:10:36,382 --> 00:10:38,622 but can you ever just be ''whelmed'' ? 189 00:10:38,742 --> 00:10:42,462 - I think you can in Europe. - Hi, ladies. 190 00:10:42,622 --> 00:10:45,262 Would you sweet young things like a ride ? 191 00:10:49,782 --> 00:10:52,382 Careful on the leather. 192 00:10:53,902 --> 00:10:55,702 Whoo ! 193 00:10:55,862 --> 00:10:58,382 That's a charming new development. 194 00:10:58,502 --> 00:11:01,182 It's disgusting. 195 00:11:03,262 --> 00:11:06,222 Remove head from sphincter, then drive ! 196 00:11:10,782 --> 00:11:15,742 - You okay ? - Yeah. Just a minor encounter with the shrew. 197 00:11:15,902 --> 00:11:19,222 - That's your girlfriend's sister. - That's Bianca's sister ? 198 00:11:19,382 --> 00:11:22,702 The mewling, rampalian wretch herself. 199 00:11:22,862 --> 00:11:24,942 - [ Sighs ] Stay cool, bro. - Yeah, see you later. 200 00:11:26,662 --> 00:11:29,342 Look out ! 201 00:11:33,502 --> 00:11:36,302 My balls ! Oh, boy. 202 00:11:42,382 --> 00:11:44,142 [ Grunts ] 203 00:11:51,262 --> 00:11:55,502 [ Laughs ] Yeah, whoo ! 204 00:12:12,502 --> 00:12:16,902 Sunshine on the window 205 00:12:17,022 --> 00:12:19,422 Makes me happy 206 00:12:19,542 --> 00:12:22,382 Like I should be 207 00:12:22,502 --> 00:12:26,862 Outside all around me 208 00:12:27,022 --> 00:12:29,262 Really sleazy 209 00:12:29,382 --> 00:12:32,102 Then it hits me 210 00:12:32,222 --> 00:12:34,062 Don't tell me 211 00:12:34,142 --> 00:12:36,942 You can't see what it means to me 212 00:12:37,022 --> 00:12:41,022 Me, me, me 213 00:12:41,142 --> 00:12:44,062 Hello, Katarina. Make anyone cry today ? 214 00:12:44,222 --> 00:12:48,142 Sadly, no. But it's only 4:30. 215 00:12:48,262 --> 00:12:50,222 - Hi, Daddy. - Hello, precious. 216 00:12:50,342 --> 00:12:52,982 - And where have you been ? - Nowhere. 217 00:12:53,142 --> 00:12:55,502 Hey, what's this ? It says Sarah Lawrence. 218 00:12:55,622 --> 00:12:58,022 [ Gasps ] 219 00:12:59,262 --> 00:13:01,422 [ Screams ] l got in ! 220 00:13:01,542 --> 00:13:03,382 [ Giggling Excitedly ] l got in ! 221 00:13:03,502 --> 00:13:05,622 Uh, honey, that's great, 222 00:13:05,742 --> 00:13:07,742 but isn't Sarah Lawrence on the other side of the country ? 223 00:13:07,902 --> 00:13:09,982 - Thus the basis of its appeal. - [ Chuckles ] 224 00:13:10,142 --> 00:13:12,262 l thought you decided you were going to stay here and go to school. 225 00:13:12,382 --> 00:13:16,462 ''U Dub,'' like me. Be a Husky. [ Growling ] 226 00:13:16,622 --> 00:13:18,622 No, you decided. 227 00:13:18,742 --> 00:13:21,342 Oh, okay, so what, you just pick up and leave, is that it ? 228 00:13:21,502 --> 00:13:22,782 Let's hope so. 229 00:13:22,902 --> 00:13:25,102 Ask Bianca who drove her home. 230 00:13:25,222 --> 00:13:27,462 Kat, don't change the-- Drove ? Who drove you home ? 231 00:13:27,542 --> 00:13:30,062 Now, don't get upset, Daddy, but there's this boy-- 232 00:13:30,142 --> 00:13:32,742 - Who's a flaming imbecile. - And I think he might ask me-- 233 00:13:32,862 --> 00:13:34,662 Please. I think I know what he's going to ask you. 234 00:13:34,742 --> 00:13:37,422 And I think I know the answer-- no. It's always no. 235 00:13:37,542 --> 00:13:41,422 What are the two house rules ? Number one: no dating till you graduate. 236 00:13:41,542 --> 00:13:44,222 Number two: no dating till you graduate. 237 00:13:44,382 --> 00:13:47,102 - That's it. - Daddy, that's so unfair. 238 00:13:47,262 --> 00:13:49,982 All right, you want to know what's unfair ? This is for you too. 239 00:13:50,142 --> 00:13:53,142 This morning I delivered a set of twins to a 15-year-old girl. 240 00:13:53,262 --> 00:13:55,422 Do you know what she said to me ? 241 00:13:55,542 --> 00:13:59,382 I'm a crack whore who should have made my skeezy boyfriend wear a condom ? 242 00:14:00,982 --> 00:14:03,022 Close, but no. 243 00:14:03,142 --> 00:14:06,262 She said, ''l should have listened to my father.'' 244 00:14:06,382 --> 00:14:08,702 - She did not. - Well, that's what she would have said... 245 00:14:08,862 --> 00:14:10,702 if she wasn't so doped up. 246 00:14:10,782 --> 00:14:13,822 Can we focus on me for a second, please ? 247 00:14:13,982 --> 00:14:15,862 l am the only girl in school who's not dating. 248 00:14:16,022 --> 00:14:18,582 - Oh, no you're not. Your sister doesn't date. - And I don't intend to. 249 00:14:18,742 --> 00:14:23,262 - And why is that again ? - Have you seen the unwashed miscreants that go to that school ? 250 00:14:23,382 --> 00:14:25,822 Where did you come from ? Planet Loser ? 251 00:14:25,982 --> 00:14:28,582 - As opposed to Planet Look At Me, Look At Me. - [ Scoffs ] 252 00:14:28,662 --> 00:14:31,102 [ Claps Hands ] Okay, here's how we solve this one. 253 00:14:31,262 --> 00:14:34,702 Old rule out. New rule: Bianca can date... 254 00:14:36,862 --> 00:14:40,142 when she does. 255 00:14:40,262 --> 00:14:42,702 But she's a mutant ! What if she never dates ? 256 00:14:42,862 --> 00:14:45,022 Then you'll never date. Oh, I like that. 257 00:14:45,142 --> 00:14:47,342 And I'll get to sleep at night. 258 00:14:47,502 --> 00:14:50,062 The deep slumber of a father whose daughters aren't out being impregnated. 259 00:14:50,142 --> 00:14:52,862 [ Pager Beeping ] 260 00:14:53,022 --> 00:14:55,062 - We'll talk about Sarah Lawrence later. - Fine. 261 00:14:55,222 --> 00:14:58,542 - Wait ! Daddy ! - Gotta go. 262 00:14:58,662 --> 00:15:00,622 Can't you just find some blind, deaf retard... 263 00:15:00,742 --> 00:15:02,902 to take you to the movies so I can have one date ? 264 00:15:03,022 --> 00:15:04,822 I'm sorry. Looks like you'll just have to miss out... 265 00:15:04,982 --> 00:15:07,502 on the witty repartee of Joey ''Eat Me'' Donner. 266 00:15:07,622 --> 00:15:09,542 [ Scoffs ] You suck. 267 00:15:09,622 --> 00:15:11,422 [ Mockingly ] You suck. 268 00:15:23,862 --> 00:15:25,622 Hi. Can we make this quick ? 269 00:15:25,742 --> 00:15:27,822 Roxanne Corinne and Andrew Jarrett are having an incredibly horrendous... 270 00:15:27,902 --> 00:15:31,102 public break-up on the quad... again. 271 00:15:31,262 --> 00:15:33,982 Oh, yeah, um, okay. l thought that we'd, um, 272 00:15:34,142 --> 00:15:37,102 start with pronunciation, if that's all right with you. 273 00:15:37,262 --> 00:15:39,662 Not the hacking and gagging and spitting part, please. 274 00:15:39,742 --> 00:15:42,862 Well, uh, there is an aIternative. 275 00:15:42,982 --> 00:15:46,022 - There is ? - Yeah, French food. 276 00:15:46,142 --> 00:15:50,022 We could eat some together, uh, 277 00:15:50,142 --> 00:15:53,102 Saturday night ? 278 00:15:53,262 --> 00:15:56,502 You're asking me out ? 279 00:15:56,622 --> 00:15:59,022 That's so cute. What's your name again ? 280 00:15:59,142 --> 00:16:02,222 Cameron. Listen, I know that your dad doesn't let you date, 281 00:16:02,382 --> 00:16:04,382 but I thought that if it was for French class. 282 00:16:04,502 --> 00:16:07,502 - Oh, wait a minute. Curtis-- - Cameron. 283 00:16:07,622 --> 00:16:11,262 My dad just came up with a new rule. l can date when my sister does. 284 00:16:11,382 --> 00:16:14,062 You're kidding. Let me ask you, do you like sailing ? 285 00:16:14,222 --> 00:16:17,262 - 'Cause I read about this place that rents boats-- - A beaucoup problemo, Calvin. 286 00:16:17,382 --> 00:16:21,422 ln case you haven't heard, my sister's a particularly hideous breed of loser. 287 00:16:21,542 --> 00:16:25,822 Yeah. Yeah, I noticed she's a little... antisocial. 288 00:16:25,982 --> 00:16:28,902 - Why is that ? - Unsolved mystery. 289 00:16:29,022 --> 00:16:31,422 She used to be really popular, and then it was like... 290 00:16:31,542 --> 00:16:33,662 she got sick of it or something. 291 00:16:33,782 --> 00:16:37,542 Theories abound as to why, but I'm pretty sure she's just incapable of human interaction. 292 00:16:37,622 --> 00:16:40,142 Plus, she's a bitch. 293 00:16:41,622 --> 00:16:43,462 Well, yeah, but I'm sure, you know, that there are... 294 00:16:43,542 --> 00:16:46,382 lots of guys who wouldn't mind going out with a difficuIt woman. 295 00:16:46,502 --> 00:16:51,182 l mean, you know, people jump out of aeroplanes and ski off cliffs. 296 00:16:51,262 --> 00:16:54,422 It'd be like ''Extreme Dating.'' Huh ? 297 00:16:55,742 --> 00:16:58,062 You think you could find someone that extreme ? 298 00:16:58,142 --> 00:16:59,942 Yeah, sure, why not ? 299 00:17:00,022 --> 00:17:03,342 - And you'd do that for me ? - Hell, yes ! 300 00:17:03,422 --> 00:17:06,702 l-l mean, you know, l could look into it. 301 00:17:07,942 --> 00:17:10,182 [ Bell Rings ] 302 00:17:12,342 --> 00:17:15,982 Now, I have gathered a group of guys-- couldn't be more perfect. 303 00:17:16,102 --> 00:17:18,702 Padua's finest. 304 00:17:21,942 --> 00:17:24,702 Hi. How you doin' ? 305 00:17:24,862 --> 00:17:28,462 Would any of you be interested in dating Katarina Stratford ? 306 00:17:28,582 --> 00:17:30,542 [ Laughing ] 307 00:17:32,702 --> 00:17:34,862 [ Chuckles ] I've never been that ripped. 308 00:17:34,982 --> 00:17:37,982 Maybe if we were the last two people alive, 309 00:17:38,142 --> 00:17:39,982 and there were no sheep. 310 00:17:40,102 --> 00:17:41,902 - Are there sheep ? - [ Screaming ] 311 00:17:48,222 --> 00:17:50,542 Did I or did I not tell you it was pointless ? 312 00:17:50,662 --> 00:17:52,462 No one will go out with her. 313 00:17:56,982 --> 00:17:58,862 Hey, hey, what about him ? 314 00:17:58,942 --> 00:18:01,462 Him ? No, don't-- don't look at him, okay ? 315 00:18:01,622 --> 00:18:05,422 He's a criminal. l heard he lit a state trooper on fire. 316 00:18:05,582 --> 00:18:09,382 - He just did a year in San Quentin. - Well, at least he's horny. 317 00:18:09,462 --> 00:18:11,982 I'm serious, man. He's whacked. 318 00:18:12,142 --> 00:18:16,462 He sold his own liver on the black market for a new set of speakers. 319 00:18:23,182 --> 00:18:24,982 He's our guy. 320 00:18:27,582 --> 00:18:30,142 [ Clears Throat ] 321 00:18:41,622 --> 00:18:43,582 Hi. How you doin' ? 322 00:18:43,702 --> 00:18:45,982 - Listen, l-- - [ Drill Whirring ] 323 00:18:47,582 --> 00:18:50,062 Okay. Later, then. 324 00:18:56,902 --> 00:18:59,542 How do we get him to date Kat ? 325 00:18:59,662 --> 00:19:02,302 [ Sighs ] l don't know. 326 00:19:02,422 --> 00:19:05,742 l mean, uh, we could pay him, 327 00:19:05,902 --> 00:19:08,062 but we don't have any money. 328 00:19:08,182 --> 00:19:10,702 Yeah, well, what we need is a backer. 329 00:19:10,822 --> 00:19:14,702 - What's that ? - Someone with money who's stupid. 330 00:19:18,302 --> 00:19:20,062 Oh, yeah. 331 00:19:28,302 --> 00:19:30,542 ls that a peach Fruit Roll-Up ? Because you don't see many-- 332 00:19:30,662 --> 00:19:33,422 Oh, okay. Yeah. All right. 333 00:19:33,582 --> 00:19:35,502 - Are you lost ? - No. 334 00:19:35,622 --> 00:19:37,502 Actually, I just came by to chat. 335 00:19:38,702 --> 00:19:41,022 - We don't chat. - Well, actually, I thought... 336 00:19:41,142 --> 00:19:43,662 that l'd run an idea by you, just to see if you're interested. 337 00:19:43,782 --> 00:19:46,422 - I'm not. - Well, hear me out. 338 00:19:46,582 --> 00:19:49,502 Now, you want Bianca, right ? 339 00:19:49,622 --> 00:19:53,182 But she can't go out with you because her sister... 340 00:19:53,342 --> 00:19:56,462 is this insane head case, and no one will go out with her, right ? 341 00:19:56,582 --> 00:19:58,782 Does this conversation have a purpose ? 342 00:19:58,902 --> 00:20:01,542 What I think you need to do, 343 00:20:01,622 --> 00:20:03,782 is you need to hire a guy who'll go out with her. 344 00:20:03,902 --> 00:20:07,142 Someone who doesn't scare so easily. 345 00:20:07,222 --> 00:20:10,382 [ Joey ] That guy ? 346 00:20:10,542 --> 00:20:13,982 - I heard he ate a live duck once. - Everything but the beak and feet. 347 00:20:14,142 --> 00:20:16,742 Clearly, he's a solid investment. 348 00:20:18,142 --> 00:20:19,902 - What's in it for you ? - Hey. 349 00:20:20,062 --> 00:20:23,742 I'm walking down the hall and l say hello to you, you say hello to me. 350 00:20:23,902 --> 00:20:26,902 Yeah, yeah, I get it. You're cool by association. 351 00:20:27,062 --> 00:20:29,382 [ Clears Throat ] I'll think about it. 352 00:20:33,462 --> 00:20:35,262 - We're done now. - Yeah. 353 00:20:40,182 --> 00:20:42,902 - What are you doing getting him involved ? - Relax, now. Relax. 354 00:20:43,062 --> 00:20:44,942 We let him pretend he's calling the shots. 355 00:20:45,062 --> 00:20:48,822 While he's busy setting things up, you have time with Bianca. 356 00:20:50,542 --> 00:20:53,582 - That is a good idea. All right. - [ Chuckling ] 357 00:20:55,302 --> 00:20:57,862 l have a dick on my face, don't I ? 358 00:21:01,582 --> 00:21:03,942 Now, remember, guys-- 359 00:21:04,062 --> 00:21:07,382 grip it and rip it. 360 00:21:15,782 --> 00:21:17,862 [ Whistles Blowing ] 361 00:21:19,942 --> 00:21:21,862 Hey. How you doin' ? 362 00:21:26,342 --> 00:21:28,142 l had some great duck last night. 363 00:21:30,182 --> 00:21:32,622 Do I know you ? 364 00:21:32,702 --> 00:21:35,182 You see that girl ? 365 00:21:36,542 --> 00:21:39,102 - Yeah. - That's Kat Stratford. 366 00:21:39,222 --> 00:21:41,302 - I want you to go out with her. - [ Scoffs ] 367 00:21:41,422 --> 00:21:43,502 Yeah, sure, Sparky. 368 00:21:44,982 --> 00:21:48,742 Look, I can't take out her sister until Kat starts dating. 369 00:21:48,862 --> 00:21:51,462 You see, their dad's whacked out. He's got this rule where the girls-- 370 00:21:51,582 --> 00:21:54,982 That's a touching story. It really is. Not my problem. 371 00:21:55,102 --> 00:21:57,262 Would you be willing to make it your problem... 372 00:21:57,382 --> 00:21:59,342 if I provide generous compensation ? 373 00:22:01,142 --> 00:22:03,822 [ Chuckles ] You're gonna pay me to take out some chick ? 374 00:22:03,942 --> 00:22:07,022 - Mm-hmm. - [ Chuckles ] 375 00:22:07,142 --> 00:22:09,662 - How much ? - Twenty bucks. 376 00:22:12,382 --> 00:22:14,862 - [ Grunts ] - [ Whistle Blowing ] 377 00:22:17,542 --> 00:22:20,542 Fine, 30. 378 00:22:20,662 --> 00:22:22,542 Well, let's think about this. 379 00:22:22,622 --> 00:22:26,462 We go to the movies, that's, uh, 15 bucks. 380 00:22:28,622 --> 00:22:32,662 We get popcorn, that's, uh, 53. 381 00:22:32,822 --> 00:22:34,942 And she'll want Raisinettes, all right ? 382 00:22:35,102 --> 00:22:38,702 So, uh, we're looking at 75 bucks. 383 00:22:38,822 --> 00:22:42,542 This isn't a negotiation. Take it or leave it, Trailer Park. 384 00:22:42,622 --> 00:22:45,102 Fifty bucks and we got a deal, Fabio. 385 00:22:48,102 --> 00:22:52,342 - [ Whistle Blowing ] - Great practise, everybody. 386 00:22:52,462 --> 00:22:55,422 - Good hustle, Stratford. - [ Kat ] Thanks, Mr Chapin. 387 00:23:03,622 --> 00:23:06,182 Hey there, girlie. 388 00:23:06,302 --> 00:23:09,102 - How you doin' ? - Sweating like a pig, actually. And yourself ? 389 00:23:09,182 --> 00:23:11,662 Now, there's a way to get a guy's attention, huh ? 390 00:23:11,822 --> 00:23:13,902 My mission in life. 391 00:23:13,982 --> 00:23:16,502 But obviously, I struck your fancy, so, you see, it worked. 392 00:23:16,622 --> 00:23:19,782 - The world makes sense again. - [ Chuckles ] 393 00:23:19,902 --> 00:23:23,102 - Pick you up on Friday, then. - Oh, right. Friday. Uh-huh. 394 00:23:24,662 --> 00:23:27,622 Well, the night I take you places you've never been before. 395 00:23:27,702 --> 00:23:29,822 Like where ? The 7-11 on Broadway ? 396 00:23:29,942 --> 00:23:32,542 Do you even know my name, screw boy ? 397 00:23:32,662 --> 00:23:34,542 l know a lot more than you think. 398 00:23:34,622 --> 00:23:37,022 Doubtful. Very doubtful. 399 00:23:43,702 --> 00:23:46,542 - We are screwed. - Hey, I don't want to hear that defeatist attitude. 400 00:23:46,662 --> 00:23:49,702 - I want to hear you upbeat. - [ Cheerfully ] We're screwed ! 401 00:23:49,822 --> 00:23:51,822 - There you go. - [ Girl ] Hey, Coach Chapin ! 402 00:23:56,542 --> 00:23:58,302 Run, Bogey ! 403 00:24:05,342 --> 00:24:07,342 Have you ever considered a new look ? 404 00:24:07,422 --> 00:24:09,502 l mean, seriously. You could have some definite potential... 405 00:24:09,622 --> 00:24:11,742 buried under all this hostility. 406 00:24:11,902 --> 00:24:14,502 I'm not hostile. I'm annoyed. 407 00:24:14,622 --> 00:24:16,462 Why don't you try being nice ? 408 00:24:16,622 --> 00:24:18,382 People wouldn't know what to think. 409 00:24:18,542 --> 00:24:21,582 - You forget, l don't care what people think. - Yes, you do. 410 00:24:21,702 --> 00:24:24,942 No, I don't. 411 00:24:25,102 --> 00:24:28,942 You don't always have to be who they want you to be, you know. 412 00:24:29,062 --> 00:24:31,462 l happen to like being adored, thank you. 413 00:24:31,582 --> 00:24:33,582 Where'd you get the pearls ? 414 00:24:33,702 --> 00:24:38,062 - They're Mom's. - And you've been what, hiding them for three years ? 415 00:24:38,142 --> 00:24:40,622 No. Daddy found them in a drawer last week. 416 00:24:40,702 --> 00:24:42,622 So you're just gonna start wearing them now ? 417 00:24:42,782 --> 00:24:45,062 It's not like she's coming back to claim them ! 418 00:24:46,942 --> 00:24:50,782 Besides, they look good on me. 419 00:24:50,902 --> 00:24:53,582 Trust me. They don't. 420 00:24:58,382 --> 00:25:00,942 Nice ride. Vintage fenders. 421 00:25:01,062 --> 00:25:03,262 Are you following me ? 422 00:25:03,382 --> 00:25:06,382 l was in the laundromat. l saw your car. I came over to say hi. 423 00:25:06,462 --> 00:25:09,422 Hi. 424 00:25:09,542 --> 00:25:12,462 - Not a big talker, huh ? - Depends on the topic. 425 00:25:12,582 --> 00:25:14,862 My fenders don't really whip me into a verbal frenzy. 426 00:25:14,942 --> 00:25:18,862 - You're not afraid of me, are you ? - Why would I be afraid of you ? 427 00:25:18,982 --> 00:25:21,342 - Well, most people are. - Well, I'm not. 428 00:25:21,462 --> 00:25:25,182 Well, maybe you're not afraid of me, but I'm sure you've thought about me naked. 429 00:25:25,342 --> 00:25:27,662 Am I that transparent ? 430 00:25:27,782 --> 00:25:30,382 l want you, I need you. Oh, baby, oh, baby. 431 00:25:34,862 --> 00:25:39,022 [ Hip-Hop Playing On Stereo ] 432 00:25:39,142 --> 00:25:41,222 [ Groans ] What is it, asshole day ? 433 00:25:42,422 --> 00:25:45,422 - Do you mind ? - Not at all. 434 00:25:53,822 --> 00:25:56,662 - [ Laughing ] - You bitch ! 435 00:25:57,902 --> 00:26:01,382 [ Chuckles ] Whoops. 436 00:26:01,462 --> 00:26:03,942 ''Whoops'' ? 437 00:26:04,062 --> 00:26:06,542 My insurance does not cover P.M.S. ! 438 00:26:06,622 --> 00:26:11,062 [ Sighs ] Well, then tell them I had a seizure. 439 00:26:11,182 --> 00:26:14,542 ls this about Sarah Lawrence ? Are you punishing me because l want you to stay close to home ? 440 00:26:14,662 --> 00:26:16,742 Aren't you punishing me because Mom left ? 441 00:26:16,862 --> 00:26:19,502 - You think you could leave her out of this ? - Fine. 442 00:26:19,622 --> 00:26:22,942 - Then stop making my decisions for me. - I'm your father. That's my right. 443 00:26:23,102 --> 00:26:24,902 So what I want doesn't matter. 444 00:26:24,982 --> 00:26:26,782 You're 18. You don't know what you want. 445 00:26:26,902 --> 00:26:28,862 And you won't know what you want till you're 45, 446 00:26:28,982 --> 00:26:31,262 and even if you get it, you'll be too old to use it. 447 00:26:31,382 --> 00:26:33,302 l want to go to an east coast school ! 448 00:26:33,422 --> 00:26:35,862 l want you to trust me to make my own choices... 449 00:26:35,982 --> 00:26:38,862 and I want you to stop trying to control my life just because you can't control yours ! 450 00:26:38,942 --> 00:26:42,142 - Yeah ? Well, you know what I want ? - [ Pager Beeping ] 451 00:26:42,302 --> 00:26:45,182 [ Groans ] We'll continue this later. 452 00:26:45,342 --> 00:26:47,182 Can't wait. 453 00:26:49,422 --> 00:26:51,502 Did you just maim Joey's car ? 454 00:26:51,622 --> 00:26:53,502 Yeah. Looks like you're gonna have to take the bus. 455 00:26:53,622 --> 00:26:56,302 Has the fact that you're completely psycho... 456 00:26:56,422 --> 00:26:58,222 managed to escape your attention ? 457 00:26:58,382 --> 00:27:00,142 Daddy ! 458 00:27:05,222 --> 00:27:09,102 - When I shell out 50, I expect resuIts. - Yeah, I'm on it. 459 00:27:09,222 --> 00:27:11,982 Watching that bitch violate my car doesn't count as a date. 460 00:27:12,142 --> 00:27:15,822 Now, if you don't get any, l don't get any. 461 00:27:15,942 --> 00:27:17,982 So get some. 462 00:27:19,102 --> 00:27:21,102 l just upped my price. 463 00:27:21,222 --> 00:27:24,502 - What ? - Hundred bucks a date. 464 00:27:24,622 --> 00:27:27,662 - ln advance. - [ Scoffs ] Forget it. 465 00:27:27,822 --> 00:27:30,022 Well, forget her sister, then. 466 00:27:34,222 --> 00:27:37,102 You better hope you're as smooth as you think you are, Verona. 467 00:27:48,862 --> 00:27:50,542 - Go. - No, you go. 468 00:27:50,662 --> 00:27:52,662 l went before. 469 00:28:00,382 --> 00:28:02,942 We know what you're trying to do with Kat Stratford. 470 00:28:03,102 --> 00:28:06,142 ls that right ? What do you plan to do about it ? 471 00:28:06,302 --> 00:28:09,262 - Help you out. - Why's that ? 472 00:28:09,382 --> 00:28:11,382 [ Stammering ] The situation is, 473 00:28:11,542 --> 00:28:16,262 my man Cameron here has a major jones for Bianca Stratford. 474 00:28:16,382 --> 00:28:18,502 What is it with this chick ? She have beer-flavoured nipples ? 475 00:28:18,622 --> 00:28:22,062 - Hey ! - l-l, uh-- I think I speak correctly... 476 00:28:22,142 --> 00:28:24,662 when I say that Cameron's love is pure, 477 00:28:24,822 --> 00:28:26,582 purer than, say, Joey Donner's. 478 00:28:26,702 --> 00:28:29,022 I'm in this for the cash. Donner can plough whoever he wants. 479 00:28:29,142 --> 00:28:31,502 Okay, there will be no ploughing. 480 00:28:31,622 --> 00:28:34,062 Patrick, uh-- Pat-- 481 00:28:34,142 --> 00:28:36,262 Let me explain something to you here. 482 00:28:36,382 --> 00:28:40,102 We set this whole thing up so Cameron can get the girl. Cameron. 483 00:28:40,182 --> 00:28:42,542 Joey's just a pawn. 484 00:28:45,142 --> 00:28:47,982 - So, you two are gonna help me tame the wild beast. - Absolutely. 485 00:28:48,102 --> 00:28:50,702 We'll do some research, we'll find out what she likes. 486 00:28:50,862 --> 00:28:52,742 We're your guys. 487 00:28:52,862 --> 00:28:56,862 And he means that in a strictly non-prison movie type of way. 488 00:28:56,982 --> 00:29:00,342 Uh, [ Clears Throat ] let's start here. 489 00:29:00,462 --> 00:29:03,342 Now, Friday night, Bogey Lowenstein is having a party. 490 00:29:03,462 --> 00:29:05,422 It's the perfect opportunity. 491 00:29:05,582 --> 00:29:09,102 - Perfect opportunity for what ? - For you to take out Kat. 492 00:29:10,182 --> 00:29:11,982 I'll think about it. 493 00:29:13,982 --> 00:29:16,582 And for a little payback. 494 00:29:16,662 --> 00:29:19,062 This is gonna be some party. 495 00:29:28,062 --> 00:29:30,662 Let's do this. 496 00:29:36,062 --> 00:29:38,822 Sexy boy 497 00:29:44,182 --> 00:29:47,062 Sexy boy 498 00:29:49,142 --> 00:29:52,222 Now, this is really important, okay ? 499 00:29:52,382 --> 00:29:54,502 Which one do you like better ? 500 00:29:57,342 --> 00:30:02,062 Hmm. I think I like the white shirt better. 501 00:30:02,182 --> 00:30:04,462 - Yeah, it's-- It's more-- - Pensive ? 502 00:30:05,902 --> 00:30:08,382 Damn. l was going for thoughtful. 503 00:30:08,542 --> 00:30:11,342 So, are you going to Bogie Lowenbrau's thing on Friday night ? 504 00:30:11,462 --> 00:30:13,502 Yeah, I might. 505 00:30:13,622 --> 00:30:16,542 Good, 'cause you know, I'm not gonna bother if you won't be there. 506 00:30:18,662 --> 00:30:20,902 - [ Bell Ringing ] - See you there. 507 00:30:20,982 --> 00:30:23,262 - Okay. - All right. 508 00:30:25,222 --> 00:30:27,822 Sexy boy 509 00:30:39,182 --> 00:30:41,902 [ Cameron ] So, have you heard about Bogey Lowenstein's party ? 510 00:30:42,062 --> 00:30:45,942 Yes, and I really, really, really want to go. 511 00:30:46,102 --> 00:30:49,502 But you know I can't. Not unless my sister does. 512 00:30:49,622 --> 00:30:51,942 Yeah, I know. I'm working on that, but so far, 513 00:30:52,062 --> 00:30:54,462 you know, she's not going for my guy. 514 00:30:54,622 --> 00:30:57,822 - She's not a-- - K.D. Lang fan ? No. 515 00:30:57,942 --> 00:31:00,142 l found a picture of Jared Leto in her drawer once, 516 00:31:00,302 --> 00:31:03,462 so I'm pretty sure she's not harbouring same-sex tendencies. 517 00:31:03,582 --> 00:31:06,542 Okay, so that's the kind of guys she likes-- Like, pretty guys. 518 00:31:06,622 --> 00:31:09,142 l don't know. All I've ever heard her say... 519 00:31:09,302 --> 00:31:11,662 is that she'd die before dating a guy that smokes. 520 00:31:11,782 --> 00:31:14,062 Okay, all right, no smoking. What else ? 521 00:31:14,142 --> 00:31:16,302 You're asking me to investigate the inner workings... 522 00:31:16,382 --> 00:31:18,222 of my sister's twisted mind ? 523 00:31:18,342 --> 00:31:20,262 l don't think so. 524 00:31:20,382 --> 00:31:24,862 Well, nothing else has worked. We need to go behind enemy lines here. 525 00:31:29,182 --> 00:31:31,982 Okay, here we go. 526 00:31:32,102 --> 00:31:34,062 Class schedule, reading list, 527 00:31:34,142 --> 00:31:37,342 date book, concert tickets, concert tickets. 528 00:31:41,382 --> 00:31:43,982 Aha ! Black panties ! 529 00:31:44,142 --> 00:31:46,022 What does that tell us ? 530 00:31:47,302 --> 00:31:49,182 She wants to have sex someday, that's what. 531 00:31:49,342 --> 00:31:51,422 You-- She could just like the colour. 532 00:31:51,582 --> 00:31:54,502 You don't buy black lingerie unless you want someone to see it. 533 00:31:55,582 --> 00:31:56,942 Oh. 534 00:31:57,102 --> 00:32:01,022 So, uh-- Can I see your room ? 535 00:32:02,382 --> 00:32:04,942 No. 536 00:32:06,902 --> 00:32:09,102 A girl's room is very personal. 537 00:32:10,302 --> 00:32:13,582 Oh, okay. [ Clears Throat ] 538 00:32:15,582 --> 00:32:19,422 [ Beeping Horn ] 539 00:32:22,782 --> 00:32:25,422 - Nice bike. - Yeah, you think so ? 540 00:32:39,102 --> 00:32:42,062 Wow. ls this what a bar looks like ? 541 00:32:43,222 --> 00:32:46,382 Don't touch anything. You may get hepatitis. 542 00:32:55,822 --> 00:32:58,182 So, what have you got for me ? 543 00:32:58,302 --> 00:33:02,702 A little insight into a very complicated girl. 544 00:33:02,862 --> 00:33:05,582 Excuse me. Just one question before we start. 545 00:33:05,702 --> 00:33:08,462 Should you be drinking alcohol when you don't have a liver ? 546 00:33:08,582 --> 00:33:11,982 - What ? - Nothing. Nothing. 547 00:33:12,102 --> 00:33:16,462 All right, first thing. Kat hates smokers. 548 00:33:19,062 --> 00:33:22,302 So, you're telling me I'm a... non-smoker. 549 00:33:22,422 --> 00:33:26,582 - Yes. Well, just for now. - And here's another problem. 550 00:33:26,702 --> 00:33:31,262 Bianca said that Kat likes pretty guys. 551 00:33:37,622 --> 00:33:40,942 - Are you telling me I'm not a pretty guy ? - He's very pretty ! 552 00:33:41,102 --> 00:33:43,542 - This is a gorgeous guy. - I just wasn't sure. I didn't know. 553 00:33:46,222 --> 00:33:49,942 All right. Uh, yeah, okay. Here's this. 554 00:33:50,102 --> 00:33:52,742 [ Clears Throat ] ''Likes. 555 00:33:52,862 --> 00:33:56,902 ''Thai food, feminist prose and angry girl music... 556 00:33:56,982 --> 00:33:59,222 of the indie rock persuasion.'' 557 00:33:59,382 --> 00:34:02,062 Here's a list of CDs she has in her room. 558 00:34:04,462 --> 00:34:06,382 So, I'm supposed to buy her some noodles and a book... 559 00:34:06,542 --> 00:34:08,622 and sit around listening to chicks who can't play their instruments, right ? 560 00:34:08,702 --> 00:34:10,782 Have you ever been to Club Skunk ? 561 00:34:10,902 --> 00:34:14,102 [ Cameron ] Her favourite band's playing there tomorrow night. 562 00:34:14,262 --> 00:34:16,222 l can't be seen at Club Skunk, all right ? 563 00:34:16,382 --> 00:34:18,622 But she'll be there. She's got tickets. 564 00:34:18,782 --> 00:34:20,822 Assail your ears for one night. 565 00:34:22,742 --> 00:34:25,302 She has a pair of black underwear. 566 00:34:26,462 --> 00:34:28,542 [ Cameron ] lf that helps. 567 00:34:28,702 --> 00:34:31,342 Couldn't hurt, right ? [ Chuckles ] 568 00:34:31,502 --> 00:34:34,062 [ Rock ] 569 00:34:45,662 --> 00:34:48,942 You can talk 570 00:34:49,022 --> 00:34:52,382 You can talk about it 571 00:34:52,502 --> 00:34:55,822 lf I'm wrong 572 00:34:55,902 --> 00:34:59,342 lf I'm wrong I'll take the blame 573 00:34:59,462 --> 00:35:02,702 You can talk 574 00:35:02,862 --> 00:35:06,142 As the hours slip away 575 00:35:06,302 --> 00:35:09,582 As my own 576 00:35:09,702 --> 00:35:13,742 I can call another day 577 00:35:13,902 --> 00:35:17,222 Come on, come on 578 00:35:17,342 --> 00:35:20,502 To my embrace 579 00:35:20,662 --> 00:35:24,182 How you sleep so easy 580 00:35:24,342 --> 00:35:27,862 ls a mystery 581 00:35:27,982 --> 00:35:31,662 You caught my ear 582 00:35:31,822 --> 00:35:35,462 Pressed to the glass Pressed to the wall 583 00:35:35,542 --> 00:35:38,622 By the way 584 00:35:38,782 --> 00:35:42,062 It's your second face l didn't see 585 00:35:42,222 --> 00:35:44,622 Thought what I heard 586 00:35:44,742 --> 00:35:46,662 - [ Continues, lndistinct ] - Verona ! What are you doing here ? 587 00:35:46,782 --> 00:35:49,422 l need agua ! 588 00:35:49,542 --> 00:35:54,142 All the things l didn't know about you 589 00:35:54,302 --> 00:35:56,702 - So won't you come on, come on - Two waters. 590 00:35:56,862 --> 00:36:01,982 Come on to my embrace 591 00:36:04,382 --> 00:36:06,782 lf you're planning on asking me out, you might as well just get it over with. 592 00:36:06,902 --> 00:36:10,342 Do you mind ? You're kind of ruining this for me. 593 00:36:10,422 --> 00:36:12,622 You're not surrounded by your usual cloud of smoke. 594 00:36:12,782 --> 00:36:15,542 l know. I quit. Apparently they're bad for you. 595 00:36:15,702 --> 00:36:18,622 You think ? 596 00:36:18,782 --> 00:36:21,782 You know, these guys are no Bikini Kill or the Raincoats. 597 00:36:21,902 --> 00:36:23,862 But they're not bad. 598 00:36:26,902 --> 00:36:30,582 - You know who the Raincoats are ? - Why, don't you ? 599 00:36:33,022 --> 00:36:35,742 l was watching you out there before. I've never seen you look so sexy. 600 00:36:35,902 --> 00:36:38,742 - [ Stops ] - [ Laughing ] 601 00:36:45,462 --> 00:36:49,222 - Come to Bogey's party with me. - You never give up, do you ? 602 00:36:49,342 --> 00:36:51,982 - [ Band Starts ] - Was that a yes ? 603 00:36:52,062 --> 00:36:55,822 - No. - Well, then, was that a no ? 604 00:36:55,942 --> 00:36:59,022 - No. - I'll see you at 9:30 then ! 605 00:37:09,422 --> 00:37:12,142 Should have used the window. 606 00:37:12,302 --> 00:37:15,302 - Hi, Daddy. - Hi. 607 00:37:15,382 --> 00:37:17,222 Where are we going ? 608 00:37:17,342 --> 00:37:20,222 Well, if you must know, a small study group of friends. 609 00:37:20,382 --> 00:37:22,542 Otherwise known as an orgy ? 610 00:37:22,662 --> 00:37:24,662 Mr Stratford, it's just a party. 611 00:37:24,822 --> 00:37:27,942 And hell is just a sauna. 612 00:37:28,022 --> 00:37:30,222 Do you know anything about a party ? 613 00:37:30,382 --> 00:37:33,902 - People expect me to be there. - Kat's not going, you're not going. 614 00:37:33,982 --> 00:37:36,142 Why can't you be normal ? 615 00:37:36,302 --> 00:37:38,862 - Define ''normal.'' - Bogey Lowenstein's party is normal. 616 00:37:38,982 --> 00:37:41,622 - What's a Bogey Lowenstein ? - Bogey's party is just a lame excuse... 617 00:37:41,782 --> 00:37:44,782 for all the idiots at our school to drink beer and rub up against each other... 618 00:37:44,902 --> 00:37:47,062 in hopes of distracting themselves from the pathetic emptiness... 619 00:37:47,222 --> 00:37:50,222 - of their meaningless-- - [ Together ] Meaningless, consumer-driven lives. 620 00:37:50,342 --> 00:37:53,382 - [ Chuckles ] - Can you, for just one night, 621 00:37:53,462 --> 00:37:56,422 forget that you're completely wretched and be my sister ? 622 00:37:56,502 --> 00:37:59,542 Please ? 623 00:37:59,702 --> 00:38:02,022 Please ? 624 00:38:02,102 --> 00:38:06,702 [ Sighs ] Come on, Kat. Please do this for me. 625 00:38:08,702 --> 00:38:10,462 Fine. I'll make an appearance. 626 00:38:11,782 --> 00:38:14,822 [ Shrieking ] 627 00:38:16,382 --> 00:38:19,062 - It's starting. - It's just a party, Daddy. 628 00:38:21,022 --> 00:38:22,862 l want you to wear the belly. 629 00:38:22,942 --> 00:38:25,822 - [ Gasps ] - Daddy, no. 630 00:38:25,942 --> 00:38:27,742 Not all night. 631 00:38:27,902 --> 00:38:30,542 Just around the living room for a minute so you can understand... 632 00:38:30,662 --> 00:38:33,142 the full weight of your decisions. 633 00:38:35,222 --> 00:38:37,302 - I am perfectly aware-- - Listen to me. 634 00:38:37,422 --> 00:38:39,542 Every time you even think about kissing a boy, 635 00:38:39,702 --> 00:38:42,302 l want you to picture wearing this under your haIter top. 636 00:38:42,422 --> 00:38:44,382 - You are so completely unbalanced. - [ Groans ] 637 00:38:44,502 --> 00:38:47,342 - We're going now. - All right, wait a minute. 638 00:38:47,462 --> 00:38:49,382 No drinking, no drugs, no kissing, 639 00:38:49,462 --> 00:38:53,702 no tattoos, no piercings, no ritual animal slaughters of any kind. 640 00:38:53,822 --> 00:38:56,862 - Oh, God, I'm giving them ideas. - [ Sighs ] Daddy ! 641 00:38:58,302 --> 00:39:00,942 - What are you doing here ? - 9:30, right ? 642 00:39:01,022 --> 00:39:04,302 - Oh, I'm early. - Whatever. I'm driving. 643 00:39:04,382 --> 00:39:06,302 Who knocked up your sister ? 644 00:39:10,262 --> 00:39:12,542 So then, Bianca says that I was right, 645 00:39:12,702 --> 00:39:15,102 that she didn't wear the Kenneth Coles with that dress... 646 00:39:15,262 --> 00:39:18,822 because she thought that it was, uh, mixing genres, right ? 647 00:39:18,902 --> 00:39:22,302 And the fact that I noticed-- and this is a direct quote, listen-- 648 00:39:22,422 --> 00:39:24,782 ''Really meant something.'' 649 00:39:24,902 --> 00:39:27,382 You told me that part already. 650 00:39:27,502 --> 00:39:29,302 I've been thinking about her all the time. 651 00:39:29,422 --> 00:39:34,062 Stop being so self-involved for one minute. How do I look ? 652 00:39:34,182 --> 00:39:36,862 You look like my Great-Uncle MiIton. 653 00:39:36,982 --> 00:39:39,102 - You think I should lose the tie ? - Yeah. 654 00:39:39,262 --> 00:39:41,702 Maybe you're right. I'm just so nervous. 655 00:39:41,822 --> 00:39:44,622 And I'm also very excited. I'm nervous, I'm excited. 656 00:39:44,742 --> 00:39:46,542 It's all very mixed up. l don't know what to do ! 657 00:39:46,702 --> 00:39:49,302 All right, just calm down, all right ? Shh. 658 00:39:49,422 --> 00:39:52,302 The last party I went to was at Chuck E. Cheese. 659 00:39:52,382 --> 00:39:55,742 You want to talk about some fun. That's a good time. 660 00:40:18,822 --> 00:40:22,462 Now, remember, guys. Don't touch anything. [ Chuckles ] 661 00:40:22,582 --> 00:40:26,542 Oop ! What did I tell you ? 662 00:40:26,702 --> 00:40:30,862 - [ Doorbell Ringing ] - Oh. Must be Nigel with the Brie. 663 00:40:31,902 --> 00:40:36,702 - [ Kicking Door ] - [ Group Cheering ] 664 00:40:40,782 --> 00:40:44,102 [ Funk ] 665 00:40:56,302 --> 00:41:00,222 You know, I'm-- I'm thinking of getting a Tercel. 666 00:41:00,382 --> 00:41:03,982 Yeah, that's a Toyota. 667 00:41:04,062 --> 00:41:07,422 It has dual side air bags and a spacious back seat. 668 00:41:13,582 --> 00:41:15,942 - Kiss me ! - Kiss him. 669 00:41:16,022 --> 00:41:18,502 - Okay. - Good. 670 00:41:21,382 --> 00:41:23,622 - Hey, thanks, man ! - [ Body Thuds ] 671 00:41:26,422 --> 00:41:28,582 Sweet. 672 00:41:28,702 --> 00:41:31,262 Looking fresh tonight, pussy cat. 673 00:41:31,382 --> 00:41:35,342 Wait. Was that-- Did your hairline just recede ? 674 00:41:35,462 --> 00:41:38,142 - Hey, where are you goin' ? - Away. 675 00:41:38,302 --> 00:41:40,542 - Your sister here ? - Stay away from my sister. 676 00:41:40,702 --> 00:41:43,182 Oh, I'll stay away from your sister. 677 00:41:43,342 --> 00:41:45,662 But I can't guarantee she'll stay away from me. 678 00:41:45,822 --> 00:41:49,582 - Fight ! - Ooh, fight ! 679 00:41:49,742 --> 00:41:52,862 [ Cheering, Hooting ] 680 00:41:56,902 --> 00:41:58,702 You guys, please ! Take it outside ! 681 00:42:01,062 --> 00:42:04,422 [ Group Gasping ] 682 00:42:04,502 --> 00:42:06,542 Thank you ! 683 00:42:08,302 --> 00:42:11,062 Hey, Kat. Look who found me. 684 00:42:12,382 --> 00:42:15,382 - Bianca, wait. - Please do not address me in public. 685 00:42:15,502 --> 00:42:17,302 No, there's something l need to tell you. 686 00:42:17,422 --> 00:42:20,942 l am busy enjoying my adolescence, so scamper off and do the same. 687 00:42:21,022 --> 00:42:22,862 Bu-bye. 688 00:42:25,542 --> 00:42:27,542 Want one ? 689 00:42:27,702 --> 00:42:30,062 - What is this ? - Right on, sister ! 690 00:42:30,222 --> 00:42:33,062 - [ Coughs ] - I've been looking all over the place for you. 691 00:42:33,182 --> 00:42:35,862 I'm getting trashed, man. lsn't that what you're supposed to do at a party ? 692 00:42:35,982 --> 00:42:38,022 l don't know. l say do what you want to do. 693 00:42:38,102 --> 00:42:40,342 Funny. You're the only one. 694 00:42:40,462 --> 00:42:42,502 Later. 695 00:42:53,862 --> 00:42:56,222 Lord of the dance ! Hi, Heather. 696 00:42:56,382 --> 00:42:59,102 - Bite me. - [ Chuckles ] Should've kept the tie. 697 00:42:59,262 --> 00:43:02,102 Hey. Hey, have you seen her around anywhere ? 698 00:43:02,262 --> 00:43:05,062 - Relax. - Relax ? I'm fine. 699 00:43:05,182 --> 00:43:07,622 Follow the love. 700 00:43:09,662 --> 00:43:11,742 Hi, Bianca. 701 00:43:11,902 --> 00:43:15,262 Oh, hi, Cameron. 702 00:43:15,382 --> 00:43:17,942 Um, you know Chastity ? 703 00:43:18,062 --> 00:43:21,782 Uh, yeah. I think, uh, we have art together, right ? 704 00:43:21,902 --> 00:43:24,102 Neat. 705 00:43:24,222 --> 00:43:27,182 So, um, you-- 706 00:43:27,302 --> 00:43:30,542 You really look amazing. 707 00:43:30,662 --> 00:43:33,342 - Thanks. - And we all know I look amazing. 708 00:43:33,462 --> 00:43:35,622 - [ Both Laughing ] - Yeah. 709 00:43:35,742 --> 00:43:39,542 Bianca, let's go. We're all congregating around Mr Cuervo. 710 00:43:39,702 --> 00:43:42,062 Um, I'll see you around, okay ? 711 00:43:53,822 --> 00:43:56,462 - [ Giggling ] - So, I've got the Sears catalogue thing going... 712 00:43:56,542 --> 00:43:59,542 and the tube sock gig-- that is gonna be huge. 713 00:43:59,702 --> 00:44:02,422 - [ Screams ] - [ Crowd Gasping ] 714 00:44:02,542 --> 00:44:04,662 And I'm up for a haemorrhoid cream ad next week. 715 00:44:04,822 --> 00:44:07,022 l know it sounds kind of bogus, but... 716 00:44:07,182 --> 00:44:09,862 l get to do some acting. 717 00:44:17,502 --> 00:44:20,382 - You see what I did there ? - Uh-huh. 718 00:44:20,502 --> 00:44:23,702 That was underwear. I'll show you the bathing suit one again. 719 00:44:26,462 --> 00:44:29,662 You see the difference ? 720 00:44:29,822 --> 00:44:31,622 All right, I'll show you guys. 721 00:44:37,942 --> 00:44:40,022 Ohhh ! 722 00:44:44,502 --> 00:44:49,662 Please tell me I am crazy 723 00:44:50,782 --> 00:44:53,462 That I'm wasting time with you 724 00:44:56,542 --> 00:44:58,982 You'll never be mine 725 00:45:01,302 --> 00:45:04,022 ls it me, or does this party all of a sudden suck ? 726 00:45:10,342 --> 00:45:12,462 Really, really, 727 00:45:12,542 --> 00:45:14,582 thank you ! 728 00:45:14,742 --> 00:45:17,142 Hey. Hey, Kat, why don't you let me have this one, huh ? 729 00:45:17,302 --> 00:45:20,102 No ! This one's mine. 730 00:45:20,222 --> 00:45:22,862 My man ! How did you get her to do it ? 731 00:45:22,982 --> 00:45:25,022 - Do what ? - Act like a human. 732 00:45:25,182 --> 00:45:29,102 - [ Rap ] - Yeah ! All right ! 733 00:45:29,262 --> 00:45:31,102 Go ! 734 00:45:35,022 --> 00:45:37,302 See this ? 735 00:45:43,382 --> 00:45:45,782 Whoo ! 736 00:46:01,062 --> 00:46:03,502 [ Head Hitting Chandelier ] 737 00:46:06,942 --> 00:46:09,862 - Are you okay ? - I'm fine. 738 00:46:11,902 --> 00:46:15,102 You're not fine. Come on. 739 00:46:15,262 --> 00:46:18,942 - I just need to lie down. - Uh-huh. You lie down and you'll go to sleep. 740 00:46:19,062 --> 00:46:21,662 - Sleep is good. - Not if you have a concussion. 741 00:46:21,782 --> 00:46:24,862 Come on. Here, sit down. 742 00:46:24,982 --> 00:46:27,462 - Sit. - Hey, hey, we need to talk. 743 00:46:27,542 --> 00:46:30,382 - I'm a little busy right now. - Can you give me a second ? 744 00:46:34,902 --> 00:46:37,062 - What ? - It's off, okay? The whole thing's off. 745 00:46:37,182 --> 00:46:39,822 - What are you talking about ? - [ Sighs ] 746 00:46:39,902 --> 00:46:42,782 She never wanted me. She wanted Joey the whole time. 747 00:46:42,902 --> 00:46:45,262 Cameron, do you like the girl ? 748 00:46:45,382 --> 00:46:48,182 - Yeah. - And is she worth all this trouble ? 749 00:46:48,342 --> 00:46:50,222 l thought she was, but, you know, l-- 750 00:46:50,382 --> 00:46:51,742 Well, she is or she isn't. 751 00:46:51,902 --> 00:46:54,822 See, first of all, Joey is not half the man you are. 752 00:46:54,902 --> 00:46:59,502 Secondly, don't let anyone ever make you feel like you don't deserve what you want. 753 00:46:59,582 --> 00:47:02,222 Go for it ! 754 00:47:02,342 --> 00:47:04,622 - [ Softly Whimpering ] - [ Gasps ] 755 00:47:04,742 --> 00:47:07,662 - Come on. - Why ? 756 00:47:07,822 --> 00:47:09,582 [ Chuckles ] 757 00:47:14,382 --> 00:47:16,182 [ Sighs ] 758 00:47:16,342 --> 00:47:18,102 - This is so patronizing. - [ Groans ] 759 00:47:18,262 --> 00:47:20,422 Leave it to you to use big words when you're smashed. 760 00:47:20,502 --> 00:47:24,862 - [ Chuckles ] I don't think so. - Kat. 761 00:47:24,982 --> 00:47:27,862 - Why are you doing this ? - I told you. You may have a concussion. 762 00:47:27,982 --> 00:47:29,782 You don't care if I never wake up. 763 00:47:29,902 --> 00:47:31,702 - Sure I do. - Why ? 764 00:47:31,862 --> 00:47:34,542 Because then l'd have to start taking out girls who actually like me. 765 00:47:34,702 --> 00:47:36,702 - Like you could find one. - Oh, see ? That, there. 766 00:47:36,862 --> 00:47:38,822 Who needs affection when I have blind hatred ? 767 00:47:38,902 --> 00:47:42,222 - I just-- Let me sit down for a while. - All right. There. 768 00:47:47,502 --> 00:47:50,902 - [ Gasps ] Geez ! - Whoo ! [ Chuckles ] 769 00:47:56,662 --> 00:47:58,902 - So, why'd you let him get to you ? - Who ? 770 00:47:59,022 --> 00:48:01,862 - Joey. - I hate him. 771 00:48:01,942 --> 00:48:06,182 Well, you've chosen the perfect revenge-- mainlining tequila. 772 00:48:07,902 --> 00:48:12,342 - Well, you know what they say. - Nope. What do they say ? 773 00:48:12,462 --> 00:48:15,502 No, no, no, no. Kat, come on, wake up ! Look at me ! 774 00:48:15,582 --> 00:48:17,782 Listen to me, Kat ! Open your eyes ! 775 00:48:17,902 --> 00:48:20,582 [ Panting ] 776 00:48:24,222 --> 00:48:26,102 Hey. 777 00:48:26,262 --> 00:48:28,382 Your eyes have a little green in them. 778 00:48:28,502 --> 00:48:31,262 [ Chuckles ] 779 00:48:33,462 --> 00:48:35,382 [ Vomiting ] 780 00:48:35,502 --> 00:48:38,262 [ Coughing ] 781 00:48:42,862 --> 00:48:44,982 [ Coughing Continues ] 782 00:48:45,102 --> 00:48:47,022 l don't know if we should go. 783 00:48:47,182 --> 00:48:49,822 Hey, a bunch of us are going to Jarrett's. Ready ? 784 00:48:49,942 --> 00:48:52,342 Um, I have to be home in 20 minutes. 785 00:48:52,462 --> 00:48:55,782 Well, you know I don't have to be home till 2:00, so-- 786 00:48:55,902 --> 00:48:59,502 - One more chance. - Aw, man, I can't. 787 00:48:59,582 --> 00:49:02,862 - Damn. - That's a shame. 788 00:49:02,982 --> 00:49:04,822 - You wanna go ? - Sure. 789 00:49:04,942 --> 00:49:07,782 - Chastity ! - Hey, you passed. 790 00:49:07,902 --> 00:49:09,702 Bitch. 791 00:49:13,462 --> 00:49:16,782 - Hey. Have fun tonight ? - Tons. 792 00:49:16,902 --> 00:49:19,062 Hey, Cameron ? Um-- 793 00:49:20,382 --> 00:49:22,902 Do you think you could give me a ride home ? 794 00:49:25,262 --> 00:49:28,102 - [ ''Cruel To Be Kind'' ] - I should do this. 795 00:49:28,222 --> 00:49:30,942 - Do what ? - This ! 796 00:49:31,062 --> 00:49:33,782 - Start a band ? - No, install car stereos. 797 00:49:33,902 --> 00:49:38,262 Yeah, start a band. My father would love that. 798 00:49:38,382 --> 00:49:40,942 I pick myself up off the ground 799 00:49:41,062 --> 00:49:42,982 To have you knock me back down 800 00:49:43,062 --> 00:49:45,822 Again and again 801 00:49:45,942 --> 00:49:47,742 And when I ask you to explain 802 00:49:47,902 --> 00:49:49,902 [ Turns Radio Off ] 803 00:49:50,022 --> 00:49:53,862 You don't strike me as the type that would ask your father for permission. 804 00:49:53,942 --> 00:49:57,182 - Oh, so now you think you know me ? - I'm getting there. 805 00:49:57,342 --> 00:49:59,902 The only thing people know about me is that I'm scary. 806 00:50:01,942 --> 00:50:04,502 Yeah, well, I'm no picnic myself. 807 00:50:10,582 --> 00:50:14,822 Uh, so what's up with your dad ? ls he-- ls he a pain in the ass ? 808 00:50:14,902 --> 00:50:17,982 No, he just wants me to be somebody that I'm not. 809 00:50:18,102 --> 00:50:19,902 - Who ? - [ Mockingly ] Bianca. 810 00:50:20,022 --> 00:50:22,182 Oh, Bianca. 811 00:50:25,182 --> 00:50:28,102 No offence or anything-- I mean l know everyone ''digs'' your sister-- 812 00:50:28,222 --> 00:50:30,982 but, um, she's without. 813 00:50:37,822 --> 00:50:40,822 You know, 814 00:50:40,942 --> 00:50:43,902 you're not as vile as I thought you were. 815 00:50:52,782 --> 00:50:55,182 Maybe we should do this another time. 816 00:51:00,502 --> 00:51:02,422 [ Scoffs ] 817 00:51:21,702 --> 00:51:24,462 [ Car Radio ] 818 00:51:30,982 --> 00:51:33,102 [ Engine, Radio Stop ] 819 00:51:39,222 --> 00:51:42,262 You never wanted to go sailing with me, did you ? 820 00:51:43,582 --> 00:51:45,902 Yes, I did. 821 00:51:46,022 --> 00:51:48,142 No, you didn't. 822 00:51:49,382 --> 00:51:51,862 Okay, no, not actually-- 823 00:51:51,982 --> 00:51:54,582 Well, then that's all you had to say. 824 00:51:56,702 --> 00:51:59,422 Have you always been this selfish ? 825 00:52:01,942 --> 00:52:04,342 [ Softly ] Yes. 826 00:52:06,662 --> 00:52:08,462 You know, just 'cause you're beautiful, 827 00:52:08,542 --> 00:52:12,502 that doesn't mean that you can treat people like they don't matter. 828 00:52:12,662 --> 00:52:15,742 l mean, I really liked you, okay. 829 00:52:15,902 --> 00:52:18,422 l-l defended you when people called you conceited, 830 00:52:18,542 --> 00:52:20,342 l helped you when you asked me to, 831 00:52:20,462 --> 00:52:24,622 l learned French for you and then you just blow me off so you could just-- 832 00:52:53,342 --> 00:52:56,062 And I'm back in the game ! 833 00:52:58,742 --> 00:53:03,062 Kat, me lady. You sway to the rhythm of me heart. 834 00:53:03,222 --> 00:53:04,982 Dance for me, cowgirl. 835 00:53:05,102 --> 00:53:07,742 Kat babe, what do we owe you for the table dance ? 836 00:53:07,902 --> 00:53:11,582 All right, not that I give a damn, but how was everybody's weekend ? 837 00:53:11,742 --> 00:53:14,542 Oh, I don't know. Maybe we should ask Kat. 838 00:53:14,702 --> 00:53:16,462 Unless she kicked the crap out of your dumb butt, 839 00:53:16,582 --> 00:53:18,062 l don't wanna hear about it. 840 00:53:18,222 --> 00:53:23,142 Okay, let's open up our books to page 73, Sonnet 141. 841 00:53:23,262 --> 00:53:25,062 And listen up. 842 00:53:25,182 --> 00:53:28,942 ln faith, I do not love thee with mine eyes. For they and thee a thousand errors note. 843 00:53:29,062 --> 00:53:31,342 But 'tis my heart loves what they despise. 844 00:53:31,462 --> 00:53:34,942 Who in despite of view is pleas'd to dote. 845 00:53:35,062 --> 00:53:38,542 Now, I know Shakespeare's a dead white guy, 846 00:53:38,662 --> 00:53:41,022 but he knows his shit, so we can overlook that. 847 00:53:41,182 --> 00:53:43,862 l want you all to write your own version of this sonnet. 848 00:53:43,982 --> 00:53:46,022 [ Class Groans ] 849 00:53:46,102 --> 00:53:49,062 Yes, Miss l-Have-An-Opinion- About-Everything ? 850 00:53:49,182 --> 00:53:51,022 Do you want this in iambic pentameter ? 851 00:53:51,182 --> 00:53:53,902 You're not gonna fight me on this ? 852 00:53:53,982 --> 00:53:55,822 No, I think it's a really good assignment. 853 00:53:55,942 --> 00:53:58,942 [ Chuckles ] You're just messin' with me, aren't you ? 854 00:53:59,062 --> 00:54:02,862 - No, I'm really looking forward to writing it. - Get out of my class. 855 00:54:02,982 --> 00:54:05,142 - What ? - Out. Get out ! 856 00:54:12,062 --> 00:54:14,222 - Thanks, Mr Morgan. - Shut up. 857 00:54:26,662 --> 00:54:30,702 I can't get enough of you, baby 858 00:54:30,862 --> 00:54:33,982 I can't get enough of you, baby 859 00:54:34,102 --> 00:54:36,982 Yes, it's true 860 00:54:37,102 --> 00:54:40,542 Hey. Cool picture. 861 00:54:40,702 --> 00:54:43,502 What's that collar for ? ls that to keep him from licking his stitches ? 862 00:54:43,582 --> 00:54:46,382 [ Laughing ] 863 00:54:46,462 --> 00:54:50,702 Kidding. No, because I know you're a fan of Shakespeare. 864 00:54:50,862 --> 00:54:54,862 [ Scoffs ] More than a fan. We're involved. 865 00:54:54,982 --> 00:54:57,382 Okay. 866 00:54:57,462 --> 00:55:01,182 Who could refrain, that had a heart to love... 867 00:55:01,342 --> 00:55:05,302 - and in that heart-- - Courage to make love known. 868 00:55:05,422 --> 00:55:08,502 - That's Macbeth, right ? - Right. 869 00:55:10,182 --> 00:55:13,862 So, listen, l-- l have this friend... 870 00:55:13,942 --> 00:55:16,062 and he likes your friend-- 871 00:55:16,222 --> 00:55:18,942 - [ People Chattering ] - [ Whistle Blowing ] 872 00:55:22,782 --> 00:55:24,702 What did you do to her ? 873 00:55:24,862 --> 00:55:27,422 l didn't do anything. She would've been too drunk to remember. 874 00:55:27,542 --> 00:55:30,742 - But the plan was working. - What do you care ? l thought you wanted out. 875 00:55:31,982 --> 00:55:34,222 Yeah, well, I did, but, uh, 876 00:55:34,342 --> 00:55:36,462 that was until she kissed me. 877 00:55:36,582 --> 00:55:40,062 - Where ? - ln the car. 878 00:55:42,382 --> 00:55:44,142 Sorry. 879 00:55:44,302 --> 00:55:46,062 - Dweeb ! Putz ! - I'm sorry. 880 00:55:46,222 --> 00:55:49,062 - All right, I talked to her. l got the scoop. - What'd she say ? 881 00:55:49,182 --> 00:55:51,302 ''Hates with him the fire of a thousand suns.'' 882 00:55:51,382 --> 00:55:52,742 That's a direct quote. 883 00:55:53,982 --> 00:55:56,662 Thanks, Malcolm. That's very comforting of you. 884 00:55:56,822 --> 00:56:00,262 We don't know. She could need a day to cool off. 885 00:56:05,742 --> 00:56:07,742 Maybe two. 886 00:56:10,782 --> 00:56:14,382 Take time for your pleasure and laugh with love 887 00:56:14,502 --> 00:56:18,302 Take the hand of another and sing for the wings of a dove 888 00:56:18,422 --> 00:56:19,742 Hey ! 889 00:56:19,902 --> 00:56:22,822 Can you imagine who would go to that antiquated mating ritual ? 890 00:56:22,902 --> 00:56:25,062 l would, but I don't have a date. 891 00:56:25,182 --> 00:56:26,982 Do you really want to get all dressed up... 892 00:56:27,062 --> 00:56:30,102 so some Drakkar Noir-wearing Dexter with a boner can feel you up... 893 00:56:30,262 --> 00:56:33,302 while you're forced to listen to a band that by definition blows ? 894 00:56:33,422 --> 00:56:35,662 All right, all right, we won't go. 895 00:56:35,782 --> 00:56:37,902 It's not like I've got a dress anyway. 896 00:56:38,022 --> 00:56:40,342 You're looking at this from entirely the wrong perspective. 897 00:56:40,462 --> 00:56:42,262 We're making a statement. 898 00:56:42,382 --> 00:56:45,902 Oh, goody. Something new and different for us. 899 00:56:45,982 --> 00:56:48,022 Whoa, whoa 900 00:56:48,182 --> 00:56:49,942 For the wings of a dove 901 00:56:50,062 --> 00:56:51,982 Whoa, whoa 902 00:56:52,062 --> 00:56:53,902 For the wings of a dove 903 00:56:53,982 --> 00:56:55,982 - Whoa, whoa - Yeah, yeah, yeah 904 00:56:56,062 --> 00:56:57,902 For the wings of a dove 905 00:56:57,982 --> 00:57:00,022 Whoa, whoa 906 00:57:00,182 --> 00:57:02,222 For the wings of a do-o-ove 907 00:57:02,342 --> 00:57:05,822 - Hey there, Cupid. - [ Exasperated Sigh ] Hi, Joey. 908 00:57:05,942 --> 00:57:09,102 You're concentrating awfully hard considering it's gym class. 909 00:57:09,262 --> 00:57:11,022 - [ Man Yelps ] - Can I help you ? 910 00:57:11,182 --> 00:57:12,942 l want to talk to you about prom. 911 00:57:13,062 --> 00:57:16,142 Ow ! Ow-ooo ! 912 00:57:18,422 --> 00:57:21,262 Look, you know the deal: l can't go if Kat doesn't go. 913 00:57:21,382 --> 00:57:23,862 Your sister is going. 914 00:57:23,982 --> 00:57:28,462 - Since when ? - Let's just say I'm taking care of it. 915 00:57:32,942 --> 00:57:36,422 This should take care of the flowers, the limo, the tux, everything. 916 00:57:36,502 --> 00:57:39,022 Just make sure she gets to the prom. 917 00:57:39,182 --> 00:57:42,342 Do you know what ? I'm sick of playing your little game. 918 00:57:42,422 --> 00:57:44,262 Okay, wait, wait, wait. 919 00:57:44,382 --> 00:57:47,782 You sick of, let's say, 300 ? 920 00:58:05,822 --> 00:58:08,702 I'm not the sort of person 921 00:58:08,862 --> 00:58:11,222 Who falls 922 00:58:11,382 --> 00:58:15,182 ln and quickly out of love 923 00:58:15,302 --> 00:58:19,422 But to you I gave my affection 924 00:58:19,542 --> 00:58:22,622 Right from the start 925 00:58:24,262 --> 00:58:26,702 I have a lover 926 00:58:26,862 --> 00:58:29,262 Who loves me 927 00:58:29,382 --> 00:58:33,462 How could I break such a heart 928 00:58:33,582 --> 00:58:37,302 And still you get my attention 929 00:58:41,462 --> 00:58:44,262 Why do you come here 930 00:58:44,382 --> 00:58:48,142 When you know I've got troubles enough 931 00:58:48,302 --> 00:58:51,622 Why do you call me 932 00:58:51,742 --> 00:58:55,422 When you know l can't answer the phone 933 00:58:55,542 --> 00:59:00,302 Make me lie and I don't want to 934 00:59:00,422 --> 00:59:04,222 And make someone else some kind of an unknowin' fool 935 00:59:04,382 --> 00:59:06,702 [ Fades ] 936 00:59:06,862 --> 00:59:09,822 Excuse me. Have you seen The Feminine Mystique ? I've lost my copy. 937 00:59:09,942 --> 00:59:12,382 - What are you doing here ? - I heard there was a poetry reading. 938 00:59:12,502 --> 00:59:15,382 - You're so-- - Charming. 939 00:59:15,502 --> 00:59:17,422 Wholesome. 940 00:59:17,502 --> 00:59:19,422 Unwelcome. 941 00:59:19,542 --> 00:59:23,502 You're not as mean as you think you are, you know that ? 942 00:59:23,662 --> 00:59:25,782 And you're not as badass as you think you are. 943 00:59:25,902 --> 00:59:28,342 Ooo, someone still has her panties in a twist. 944 00:59:28,462 --> 00:59:31,662 Don't for one minute think that you had any effect whatsoever on my panties. 945 00:59:31,822 --> 00:59:33,582 Then what did I have an effect on ? 946 00:59:33,742 --> 00:59:36,462 Other than my upchuck reflex, nothing. 947 00:59:47,742 --> 00:59:50,102 You're right, she's still pissed. 948 00:59:50,262 --> 00:59:52,182 Sweet love, renew thy force. 949 00:59:52,342 --> 00:59:56,222 Hey ! Don't say shit like that to me. People can hear you. 950 00:59:56,382 --> 00:59:58,142 Look, you embarrassed the girl. 951 00:59:58,302 --> 01:00:01,982 Sacrifice yourself on the aItar of dignity and even the score. 952 01:00:04,902 --> 01:00:07,662 Listen, don't say shit like that to him. 953 01:00:07,822 --> 01:00:10,222 People can hear you. 954 01:00:10,382 --> 01:00:15,462 There's a new kind of world that's taking over 955 01:00:15,542 --> 01:00:18,622 It's got devils It's got angels 956 01:00:18,782 --> 01:00:20,782 Sitting on my shoulders 957 01:00:20,902 --> 01:00:25,582 There's a new kind of world that's taking over 958 01:00:29,982 --> 01:00:32,142 [ Microphone Feeds Back ] 959 01:00:38,502 --> 01:00:42,382 [ Patrick ] You're just too good to be true 960 01:00:42,502 --> 01:00:46,302 Can't take my eyes off of you 961 01:00:46,422 --> 01:00:49,382 You'd be like heaven to touch 962 01:00:49,462 --> 01:00:53,382 I wanna hold you so much 963 01:00:53,462 --> 01:00:57,262 At long last love has arrived 964 01:00:57,382 --> 01:01:00,982 And I thank God I'm alive 965 01:01:01,102 --> 01:01:04,462 You're just too good to be true 966 01:01:04,582 --> 01:01:08,462 Can't take my eyes off of you 967 01:01:08,542 --> 01:01:10,582 - [ Blowing Whistle ] - [ Playing Song ] 968 01:01:24,702 --> 01:01:27,342 - I love you, baby - [ Continues Playing ] 969 01:01:27,462 --> 01:01:30,702 And if it's quite all right l need you, baby 970 01:01:30,822 --> 01:01:35,022 To warm the lonely night l love you, baby 971 01:01:35,182 --> 01:01:39,582 Trust in me when I say 972 01:01:39,742 --> 01:01:41,982 Oh, pretty baby 973 01:01:42,102 --> 01:01:45,702 Don't bring me down, I pray Oh, pretty baby 974 01:01:45,822 --> 01:01:51,302 Now that I found you, stay and let me love you, baby 975 01:01:51,382 --> 01:01:56,142 Let me love you 976 01:01:56,302 --> 01:01:58,702 [ Continues Playing ] 977 01:02:15,542 --> 01:02:17,582 [ Laughs ] 978 01:02:30,382 --> 01:02:32,462 - [ Grimaces Softly ] - [ Girl Giggles ] 979 01:02:38,822 --> 01:02:40,942 You look pretty nervous. 980 01:02:41,022 --> 01:02:43,662 [ Timidly ] Yes, sir. 981 01:02:43,782 --> 01:02:45,862 You're sweating like a pig. 982 01:02:45,942 --> 01:02:48,102 Yes, sir. 983 01:02:48,222 --> 01:02:50,702 Your eyes are all... bloodshot. 984 01:02:50,822 --> 01:02:52,862 Yes, sir. 985 01:02:52,982 --> 01:02:55,262 You've got pot, don't you ? 986 01:03:01,222 --> 01:03:04,302 I'm confiscating this. 987 01:03:11,942 --> 01:03:13,742 This too. 988 01:03:17,982 --> 01:03:20,942 Mr Chapin, can I talk to you for a second ? 989 01:03:21,022 --> 01:03:22,862 What can I do for you, Stratford ? 990 01:03:22,942 --> 01:03:25,582 l have some ideas on how we can improve the girls' soccer team. 991 01:03:25,742 --> 01:03:28,742 Great ! Let's talk about it later. 992 01:03:30,022 --> 01:03:32,782 [ Whispering ] The window. 993 01:03:32,902 --> 01:03:35,502 The window. 994 01:03:35,662 --> 01:03:38,942 [ Chuckles ] As you know, we have a really big game with Hillcrest High-- 995 01:03:39,062 --> 01:03:41,262 [ Gasps ] Your bicep is huge ! 996 01:03:41,382 --> 01:03:43,502 Oh, my God. The other one's even bigger. 997 01:03:43,662 --> 01:03:46,502 You don't take steroids, do you, because I've heard steroids... 998 01:03:46,582 --> 01:03:48,982 can severely disintegrate your... package ? 999 01:03:49,102 --> 01:03:51,582 - [ Class Groans ] - Not that I'm thinking about your package. 1000 01:03:51,742 --> 01:03:53,862 - That's not the point. - Let's hope not. 1001 01:03:53,942 --> 01:03:57,342 - [ Floorboard Creaks ] - The point is they kick our butts every year. 1002 01:03:57,462 --> 01:04:01,582 l was thinking, I devised a plan that will enable us to finally defeat them. 1003 01:04:01,702 --> 01:04:03,502 Which is ? 1004 01:04:03,582 --> 01:04:06,062 - That thing that you taught us. - What thing ? 1005 01:04:06,222 --> 01:04:08,782 - Misdirection. - I taught you that ? 1006 01:04:08,862 --> 01:04:12,502 Yeah, you or Siegfried or Roy ? Anyway, that's not important. 1007 01:04:12,662 --> 01:04:15,262 - [ Floorboard Creaks ] - The-- Think about it. 1008 01:04:15,382 --> 01:04:17,742 Um, they're looking left and we're running right. 1009 01:04:17,902 --> 01:04:19,942 Bang, we score. We win. 1010 01:04:20,022 --> 01:04:22,782 Okay, but how do we get 'em to look left ? 1011 01:04:22,902 --> 01:04:26,262 - [ Banging ] - Um, like this. 1012 01:04:26,382 --> 01:04:28,742 [ Class Cheering ] 1013 01:04:33,182 --> 01:04:36,462 Okay. Well, 1014 01:04:36,582 --> 01:04:39,062 now that you've seen ''the plan,'' 1015 01:04:39,222 --> 01:04:43,502 I'm gonna go and show ''the plan'' to someone else. 1016 01:04:44,782 --> 01:04:46,942 Okay. 1017 01:04:47,062 --> 01:04:48,862 Hi. 1018 01:04:52,582 --> 01:04:56,142 [ Both Laughing ] 1019 01:04:56,262 --> 01:04:59,022 l can't thank you enough for helping me sneak out of detention. 1020 01:04:59,102 --> 01:05:00,942 - Very cool. - No problem. 1021 01:05:01,022 --> 01:05:04,182 l thought for sure I was busted when l was climbing out that window, I tell ya. 1022 01:05:04,342 --> 01:05:06,262 So, how did you keep him distracted ? 1023 01:05:06,382 --> 01:05:09,742 l dazzled him with my... wits. 1024 01:05:12,542 --> 01:05:14,982 - So, what's your excuse ? - For ? 1025 01:05:15,062 --> 01:05:17,902 For acting the way we do ? 1026 01:05:18,022 --> 01:05:19,822 l don't like to do what people expect. 1027 01:05:19,942 --> 01:05:22,902 Why should I live up to other people's expectations instead of my own ? 1028 01:05:23,022 --> 01:05:26,182 So, you disappoint 'em from the start and then you're covered, right ? 1029 01:05:27,262 --> 01:05:29,382 Something like that. 1030 01:05:31,062 --> 01:05:33,462 - Then you screwed up. - How ? 1031 01:05:35,102 --> 01:05:37,702 You never disappointed me. 1032 01:05:45,502 --> 01:05:47,582 Are you up for it ? 1033 01:05:47,742 --> 01:05:49,502 Up for what ? 1034 01:05:57,182 --> 01:06:00,382 [ Groans ] 1035 01:06:00,502 --> 01:06:03,742 Fascinating new thing 1036 01:06:03,902 --> 01:06:05,102 - [ Groans ] - You delight me 1037 01:06:05,262 --> 01:06:08,262 And I know you're speaking of me 1038 01:06:08,382 --> 01:06:11,662 - [ Laughing ] - Fascinating new thing 1039 01:06:11,822 --> 01:06:13,662 - [ Screams ] - Get beside me 1040 01:06:13,822 --> 01:06:16,582 I want you to love me 1041 01:06:18,862 --> 01:06:23,502 I'm surprised that you've never been told before 1042 01:06:23,582 --> 01:06:26,622 - [ Shouts ] - That you're lovely and you're perfect 1043 01:06:26,782 --> 01:06:29,342 And that somebody wants you 1044 01:06:46,102 --> 01:06:50,822 I'm surprised that you've never been told before 1045 01:06:50,902 --> 01:06:53,182 That you're lovely and you're perfect 1046 01:06:53,342 --> 01:06:55,462 And that somebody wants you 1047 01:06:55,542 --> 01:07:00,102 I'm surprised that you've never been told before 1048 01:07:00,222 --> 01:07:02,502 That you're priceless Yeah, you're holy 1049 01:07:02,582 --> 01:07:06,102 Even when you are not new 1050 01:07:07,382 --> 01:07:10,262 - [ Laughing ] - All right, come on. 1051 01:07:10,382 --> 01:07:12,982 Fascinating new thing 1052 01:07:14,662 --> 01:07:17,022 Fascinating new thing 1053 01:07:17,182 --> 01:07:19,262 All right 1054 01:07:24,902 --> 01:07:26,942 No, none of that stuff is true. 1055 01:07:27,062 --> 01:07:30,102 - State trooper. - Fallacy. Dead guy in the parking lot ? 1056 01:07:30,262 --> 01:07:32,062 Rumour. The duck ? 1057 01:07:32,222 --> 01:07:34,502 Hearsay. Bobby Ridgeway's balls ? 1058 01:07:34,582 --> 01:07:37,342 Fact. But he deserved it. He tried to grope me in the lunch line. 1059 01:07:37,462 --> 01:07:39,462 - Fair enough. - The accent ? 1060 01:07:39,542 --> 01:07:43,022 It's real. l lived in Australia until I was ten. 1061 01:07:43,182 --> 01:07:46,062 - With the Pygmies ? - [ Chuckles ] Close. 1062 01:07:46,182 --> 01:07:48,902 With my mom. 1063 01:07:48,982 --> 01:07:52,062 Where were you last year ? l know the porn career is a lie. 1064 01:07:52,222 --> 01:07:54,222 Do you ? 1065 01:08:01,382 --> 01:08:04,462 - Tell me something true. - Something true. 1066 01:08:06,982 --> 01:08:08,902 l hate peas. 1067 01:08:08,982 --> 01:08:12,462 No. Something real. Something no one else knows. 1068 01:08:12,542 --> 01:08:15,022 Okay. You're sweet... 1069 01:08:16,902 --> 01:08:18,702 and sexy... 1070 01:08:18,822 --> 01:08:20,622 [ Kisses Neck ] 1071 01:08:20,742 --> 01:08:23,102 and completely hot for me. 1072 01:08:23,222 --> 01:08:26,302 You are amazingly self-assured. Has anyone ever told you that ? 1073 01:08:26,462 --> 01:08:28,862 l tell myself that every day, actually. 1074 01:08:32,582 --> 01:08:36,302 - Go to the prom with me. - ls that a request or a command ? 1075 01:08:36,462 --> 01:08:38,662 Come on. Go with me. 1076 01:08:38,782 --> 01:08:41,782 - No. - No ? Why not ? 1077 01:08:41,902 --> 01:08:44,142 Because I don't want to. Because it's a stupid tradition. 1078 01:08:44,222 --> 01:08:47,262 Come on. People won't expect you to go. 1079 01:08:47,422 --> 01:08:49,382 Why are you pushing this ? 1080 01:08:51,222 --> 01:08:53,702 What's in it for you ? 1081 01:08:54,622 --> 01:08:56,942 Oh. 1082 01:08:57,062 --> 01:08:59,742 S-So now I need to have a motive to want to be with you ? 1083 01:08:59,902 --> 01:09:01,702 You tell me. 1084 01:09:01,822 --> 01:09:05,342 Oh, f-- You need therapy, you know that ? 1085 01:09:05,502 --> 01:09:08,062 Has anyone ever told you that ? 1086 01:09:08,182 --> 01:09:10,342 - Answer the question, Patrick. - Nothing ! 1087 01:09:10,462 --> 01:09:14,702 There is nothing in it for me, just the pleasure of your company. Okay? 1088 01:09:14,822 --> 01:09:16,662 [ Scoffs ] 1089 01:09:24,942 --> 01:09:27,422 [ Speaking French ] 1090 01:09:38,022 --> 01:09:40,942 Wait. Wait a minute. That-- That's not on this page. 1091 01:09:52,182 --> 01:09:53,982 Merde. 1092 01:10:14,862 --> 01:10:17,262 [ Groans, Panting ] 1093 01:10:18,902 --> 01:10:20,662 Seven ! 1094 01:10:22,462 --> 01:10:24,542 Good. 1095 01:10:28,062 --> 01:10:30,182 - Daddy ? - Hi, honey. 1096 01:10:30,262 --> 01:10:34,382 l'd like to discuss tomorrow night with you. As you know, it's the prom-- 1097 01:10:40,462 --> 01:10:42,982 The prom ? Kat has a date ? 1098 01:10:43,062 --> 01:10:45,902 Well, no. 1099 01:10:45,982 --> 01:10:50,702 Don't think you're fooling me. l know who you wanna bend the rules for. It's that hot-rod Joey. 1100 01:10:50,862 --> 01:10:53,422 What's a hot rod ? 1101 01:10:53,542 --> 01:10:57,782 It's a-- lf your sister's not going, you're not going. End of story. 1102 01:10:57,902 --> 01:11:00,382 Okay, let's review. 1103 01:11:00,542 --> 01:11:03,022 Kat, not interested; me, dying to go. 1104 01:11:03,142 --> 01:11:05,182 Do you know what happens at proms ? 1105 01:11:05,302 --> 01:11:08,302 Yes, Daddy. We'll dance, we'll kiss, we'll come home. 1106 01:11:08,422 --> 01:11:10,662 It's not quite the crisis situation you imagine. 1107 01:11:10,782 --> 01:11:13,222 Kissing, huh ? That's what you think happens ? 1108 01:11:13,302 --> 01:11:14,702 Got news for you. 1109 01:11:14,822 --> 01:11:18,422 Kissing isn't what keeps me up to my elbows in placenta all day long. 1110 01:11:18,582 --> 01:11:21,902 Can we for two seconds ignore the fact that you're severely unhinged... 1111 01:11:21,982 --> 01:11:23,982 and discuss my need for a night of teenage normalcy ? 1112 01:11:24,102 --> 01:11:27,142 What's normal ? Those damn Dawson's River kids... 1113 01:11:27,222 --> 01:11:29,742 sleeping in each other's beds and whatnot ? 1114 01:11:29,862 --> 01:11:32,302 - Daddy, that is so not-- - Got news for ya. 1115 01:11:32,462 --> 01:11:34,222 I'm down. I've got the 4-1-1. 1116 01:11:34,342 --> 01:11:36,902 And you are not going out and getting jiggy with some boy. 1117 01:11:36,982 --> 01:11:38,502 l don't care how dope his ride is. 1118 01:11:38,622 --> 01:11:41,382 [ Groans ] 1119 01:11:43,582 --> 01:11:45,942 My mama didn't raise no fool. 1120 01:11:47,582 --> 01:11:50,462 Thanks, Bill. 1121 01:11:50,662 --> 01:11:53,302 Ridiculous amounts of love across this nation worldwide. 1122 01:11:53,462 --> 01:11:56,342 - [ Chuckles ] - Believe it. 1123 01:11:56,502 --> 01:11:58,262 [ Girl ] This is the true story. 1124 01:11:58,422 --> 01:12:00,182 - The Real World. - [ Man ] Seattle. 1125 01:12:01,302 --> 01:12:04,862 - [ Knocking ] - [ Groans ] Come in. 1126 01:12:04,982 --> 01:12:07,742 [ Slow Piano On TV ] 1127 01:12:10,902 --> 01:12:13,382 Listen, I know-- 1128 01:12:13,502 --> 01:12:15,302 [ TV Shuts Off ] 1129 01:12:15,422 --> 01:12:18,542 l know you hate having to sit at home because I'm not Suzy High School. 1130 01:12:18,702 --> 01:12:21,502 - Like you care. - I do care. 1131 01:12:21,662 --> 01:12:24,142 But I'm a firm believer in doing something for your own reasons... 1132 01:12:24,262 --> 01:12:26,222 and not someone else's. 1133 01:12:26,342 --> 01:12:28,582 Well, I wish I had that luxury. 1134 01:12:28,702 --> 01:12:31,662 You know, I'm the only sophomore that got asked to go to the prom... 1135 01:12:31,822 --> 01:12:34,782 and I can't go because you don't feel like it. 1136 01:12:38,582 --> 01:12:41,262 Joey never told you that we went out, did he ? 1137 01:12:41,422 --> 01:12:45,622 - Yeah, okay. - ln ninth, for a month. 1138 01:12:51,222 --> 01:12:55,462 - Why ? - Because he was, like, such a babe. 1139 01:12:55,582 --> 01:12:58,222 - But you hate Joey. - Now I do. 1140 01:12:58,342 --> 01:13:00,462 So, what happened ? 1141 01:13:05,142 --> 01:13:08,982 Oh ! [ Laughs ] Please tell me you're joking. 1142 01:13:09,102 --> 01:13:12,982 Just once, right after Mom left. 1143 01:13:13,102 --> 01:13:15,822 Everyone was doing it, so... 1144 01:13:15,902 --> 01:13:18,502 l did it. 1145 01:13:18,622 --> 01:13:22,062 Afterwards I told him I didn't want to any more because I wasn't ready, 1146 01:13:22,142 --> 01:13:25,262 and he got pissed and he dumped me. 1147 01:13:25,342 --> 01:13:29,102 After that I swore l'd never do anything just because everyone else was doing it. 1148 01:13:29,182 --> 01:13:31,302 And I haven't since, 1149 01:13:31,422 --> 01:13:35,742 with the exception of Bogey's party and my stunning digestive pyrotechnics. 1150 01:13:37,422 --> 01:13:40,142 How is it possible that I did not know about this ? 1151 01:13:40,222 --> 01:13:42,542 l warned him that if he told anyone, 1152 01:13:42,662 --> 01:13:46,622 the cheerleading squad would find out how tiny his dick is. 1153 01:13:48,902 --> 01:13:51,662 Okay, so why didn't you tell me ? 1154 01:13:53,422 --> 01:13:56,222 l wanted to let you make up your mind about him. 1155 01:13:57,862 --> 01:14:00,662 Then why did you help Daddy hold me hostage ? 1156 01:14:00,822 --> 01:14:03,382 It's not like I'm stupid enough to repeat your mistakes. 1157 01:14:03,542 --> 01:14:05,742 l guess I thought I was protecting you. 1158 01:14:05,862 --> 01:14:08,782 By not letting me experience anything for myself ? 1159 01:14:08,902 --> 01:14:10,702 Not all experiences are good, Bianca. 1160 01:14:10,822 --> 01:14:13,342 You can't always trust the people you want to. 1161 01:14:13,502 --> 01:14:16,302 Well, I guess I'll never know, will I ? 1162 01:14:36,982 --> 01:14:40,142 The grey ceiling on the Earth 1163 01:14:40,222 --> 01:14:42,742 Well, it lasted for a while 1164 01:14:42,902 --> 01:14:45,542 Take my thoughts for what they're worth 1165 01:14:45,662 --> 01:14:48,462 I've been acting like a child 1166 01:14:48,622 --> 01:14:51,422 But what else, what else can I do 1167 01:14:51,582 --> 01:14:56,062 I said I'm sorry Yes, I'm sorry 1168 01:14:59,262 --> 01:15:03,022 Ladies with thinning hair or bald spots, G.L.H. solves the problem instantly. 1169 01:15:03,102 --> 01:15:05,462 G.L.H. is not a paint or a cover-up. 1170 01:15:05,622 --> 01:15:09,542 It's an amazing powder that clings to the tiniest hairs on your head. 1171 01:15:09,662 --> 01:15:11,982 It actually builds on itself... 1172 01:15:12,062 --> 01:15:14,062 leaving you with great, great looking hair. 1173 01:15:14,182 --> 01:15:17,582 - And the G.L.H. hair system is not expensive. - lnteresting. 1174 01:15:17,702 --> 01:15:19,822 Order your G.L.H. hair package now. 1175 01:15:19,942 --> 01:15:22,382 Bye, Dad. I'm going to the prom. 1176 01:15:22,542 --> 01:15:24,782 - Funny, sweetie. - [ Door Opens ] 1177 01:15:24,902 --> 01:15:28,622 - It instantly covers your bald spot leaving you with great looking hair. - [ Door Closes ] 1178 01:15:31,422 --> 01:15:33,542 - What's that ? - A prom dress. 1179 01:15:33,662 --> 01:15:36,342 l seem to be hearing that word a lot lately. 1180 01:15:36,502 --> 01:15:37,782 [ Doorbell Rings ] 1181 01:15:40,742 --> 01:15:45,062 - Hi. - Wow. l, um-- 1182 01:15:45,142 --> 01:15:48,782 [ Stammers, Chuckles ] Wow. 1183 01:15:48,902 --> 01:15:51,662 - [ Chuckles ] Bye, Daddy. - Stop. 1184 01:15:51,822 --> 01:15:55,582 Turn. Explain. 1185 01:15:55,742 --> 01:15:58,902 Okay. Remember how you said l could date if Kat dated ? 1186 01:15:59,022 --> 01:16:02,822 Well, she found this guy who's actually kind of perfect for her which is perfect for me... 1187 01:16:02,902 --> 01:16:05,822 because Cameron asked me to go to the prom and I really, really wanna go, 1188 01:16:05,942 --> 01:16:09,182 and since Kat went I guess I'm allowed to based on the aforementioned rule... 1189 01:16:09,302 --> 01:16:11,382 and its previous stipulations, of course. 1190 01:16:11,542 --> 01:16:14,022 - Nice to meet you. - Let's go. 1191 01:16:16,902 --> 01:16:19,502 l know every cop in town, bucko ! 1192 01:16:21,862 --> 01:16:24,102 This is not good. 1193 01:16:25,662 --> 01:16:29,582 I said I want you to know 1194 01:16:29,742 --> 01:16:33,462 I said I want you to know right now 1195 01:16:33,622 --> 01:16:37,062 Well, I want you to know 1196 01:16:37,142 --> 01:16:42,382 I said I want you to kno-o-o-w 1197 01:16:42,502 --> 01:16:45,302 Who-o-o-a 1198 01:16:47,222 --> 01:16:49,462 Shout, shout 1199 01:16:49,622 --> 01:16:51,862 Shout, shout 1200 01:16:51,982 --> 01:16:53,782 Hey-a-a-a 1201 01:16:53,902 --> 01:16:55,702 [ Crowd ] Hey-a-a-a 1202 01:16:55,862 --> 01:16:58,542 [ Music Fades ] 1203 01:17:03,902 --> 01:17:06,382 Wow. 1204 01:17:06,542 --> 01:17:08,662 You too. 1205 01:17:10,262 --> 01:17:12,382 Where'd you get a tux at the last minute ? 1206 01:17:12,542 --> 01:17:15,702 Oh, just something I had, you know, lying around. 1207 01:17:15,862 --> 01:17:19,622 - Where'd you get the dress ? - Oh, just something I had, you know, lying around. 1208 01:17:22,902 --> 01:17:27,022 Listen, I'm really sorry that I questioned your motives. 1209 01:17:27,142 --> 01:17:28,942 l was wrong. 1210 01:17:29,062 --> 01:17:31,822 [ Sighs Deeply ] You're forgiven. 1211 01:17:34,822 --> 01:17:36,702 Okay. 1212 01:17:36,862 --> 01:17:39,422 - Ready for the prom ? - Yes, ma'am. 1213 01:17:52,262 --> 01:17:55,862 Hi, Mr Stratford. I'm Joey. I'm here to pick up Bianca. 1214 01:18:03,422 --> 01:18:05,262 On their minds 1215 01:18:05,422 --> 01:18:09,542 Their hormones are raging and they want it all the time 1216 01:18:09,662 --> 01:18:12,142 And I know l know 'cause you said so 1217 01:18:12,262 --> 01:18:16,302 And I can't just let you go and l know, I know 'cause you said so 1218 01:18:16,422 --> 01:18:18,222 - Have you seen him ? - Who ? 1219 01:18:18,302 --> 01:18:21,062 William. He asked me to meet him here. 1220 01:18:21,142 --> 01:18:25,422 Oh, Mandella, please tell me you haven't progressed to full-on hallucinations. 1221 01:18:25,582 --> 01:18:28,182 You're last to see and last to touch 1222 01:18:28,302 --> 01:18:30,822 But I would never, ever, ever treat you wrong 1223 01:18:30,902 --> 01:18:33,742 Been waiting for you all day long 1224 01:18:33,862 --> 01:18:37,542 And I know, I know 'cause you said so and I can't just let you go 1225 01:18:37,662 --> 01:18:41,902 And I know, I know 'cause you said so and I can't just let you go 1226 01:18:47,342 --> 01:18:49,662 - Milady. - Good sir. 1227 01:19:09,982 --> 01:19:12,902 [ ''Cruel To Be Kind'' ] 1228 01:19:12,982 --> 01:19:16,142 Oh, my God, it's-- 1229 01:19:16,222 --> 01:19:18,702 l called in a favour ! 1230 01:19:24,062 --> 01:19:27,542 Oh, I can't take another heartache 1231 01:19:27,702 --> 01:19:31,662 Though you say you're my friend I'm at my wit's end 1232 01:19:31,822 --> 01:19:33,982 You say your love is bona fide 1233 01:19:34,102 --> 01:19:38,462 But that don't coincide with the things that you do 1234 01:19:38,622 --> 01:19:42,062 And when I ask you to be nice 1235 01:19:42,142 --> 01:19:44,102 You say you gotta be 1236 01:19:44,182 --> 01:19:47,502 Cruel to be kind in the right measure 1237 01:19:47,622 --> 01:19:50,382 Cruel to be kind It's a very good sign 1238 01:19:50,502 --> 01:19:55,862 Cruel to be kind means that I love you, baby 1239 01:19:55,982 --> 01:19:57,782 You gotta be cruel to be kind 1240 01:19:57,902 --> 01:20:02,142 Ooo-ooo-ooo-ooo-oo 1241 01:20:02,262 --> 01:20:05,302 Cruel to be kind in the right measure 1242 01:20:05,462 --> 01:20:08,382 Cruel to be kind It's a very good sign 1243 01:20:08,542 --> 01:20:11,262 [ Girls Chattering ] 1244 01:20:12,982 --> 01:20:14,542 What are you doing here ? 1245 01:20:14,702 --> 01:20:17,142 l know you didn't think you were the only sophomore at the prom. 1246 01:20:17,262 --> 01:20:19,062 Joey just picked me up. 1247 01:20:19,182 --> 01:20:21,942 Oh, well, congratulations. He's all yours. 1248 01:20:22,062 --> 01:20:23,502 Very generous, princess. 1249 01:20:23,622 --> 01:20:26,382 And just so you know, Joey only liked you for one reason. 1250 01:20:26,542 --> 01:20:28,462 He even had a bet going with his friends. 1251 01:20:28,582 --> 01:20:30,742 He was gonna nail you tonight. 1252 01:20:35,702 --> 01:20:37,902 - Milwaukee. - What ? 1253 01:20:38,022 --> 01:20:40,862 That's where I was last year. l wasn't in jail. 1254 01:20:40,982 --> 01:20:45,862 l don't know Marilyn Manson and I didn't sleep with a Spice Girl, I don't think. 1255 01:20:45,942 --> 01:20:49,742 You see, my grandpa, he was ill so l spent most of the year on his couch... 1256 01:20:49,862 --> 01:20:53,222 watching Wheel of Fortune and making Spaghettios. 1257 01:20:53,302 --> 01:20:55,342 End of story. 1258 01:20:55,462 --> 01:20:57,262 No way. 1259 01:20:59,062 --> 01:21:02,982 Hey. What's Bianca doing here with that cheese dick ? 1260 01:21:03,062 --> 01:21:07,182 l didn't pay you to take out Kat so some little punk could snake me with Bianca. 1261 01:21:10,302 --> 01:21:13,062 Nothing in it for you, huh ? 1262 01:21:24,262 --> 01:21:26,302 The shit hath hitteth... 1263 01:21:26,462 --> 01:21:28,502 the faneth. 1264 01:21:31,742 --> 01:21:34,742 Joey, pal, compadre ? 1265 01:21:37,982 --> 01:21:41,102 You messed with the wrong guy, and now you're gonna pay. 1266 01:21:41,222 --> 01:21:43,902 You and that little bitch. 1267 01:21:44,022 --> 01:21:46,702 All right, that's enough, okay ! You crossed the line. 1268 01:21:49,142 --> 01:21:51,342 Oh, come on ! Get up, you little punk ! 1269 01:21:56,902 --> 01:21:59,942 Shit, Bianca ! I'm shooting a nose spray ad tomorrow ! 1270 01:22:00,022 --> 01:22:02,862 That's for making my date bleed ! That's for my sister ! 1271 01:22:02,982 --> 01:22:06,382 - [ Groans ] - And that's for me. 1272 01:22:13,342 --> 01:22:15,542 Are you okay ? 1273 01:22:15,702 --> 01:22:17,782 Never been better. 1274 01:22:21,302 --> 01:22:23,622 [ Groaning Continues ] 1275 01:22:26,102 --> 01:22:30,142 - Would you give me a chance-- - You were paid to take me out by the one person I truly hate. 1276 01:22:30,262 --> 01:22:32,062 l knew this was a set-up ! 1277 01:22:32,182 --> 01:22:33,982 Kat, it wasn't like that, okay. 1278 01:22:34,102 --> 01:22:37,422 What was it like, a down payment now and a bonus for sleeping with me ? 1279 01:22:37,542 --> 01:22:40,462 No, I didn't care about the money ! l cared-- 1280 01:22:40,582 --> 01:22:42,302 l cared about you. 1281 01:22:44,262 --> 01:22:46,542 You are so not who I thought you were. 1282 01:22:49,782 --> 01:22:53,742 That is how love goes 1283 01:22:55,622 --> 01:23:00,142 You will fly and you will crawl 1284 01:23:00,262 --> 01:23:05,582 God knows even angels fall 1285 01:23:08,462 --> 01:23:11,062 And it's a secret 1286 01:23:11,182 --> 01:23:13,422 That no one tells 1287 01:23:13,542 --> 01:23:18,142 One day it's heaven One day it's hell 1288 01:23:18,262 --> 01:23:20,542 And it's no fairy tale 1289 01:23:20,702 --> 01:23:23,222 Take it from me 1290 01:23:23,342 --> 01:23:27,342 That's the way it's supposed to be 1291 01:23:27,462 --> 01:23:29,662 [ Sighs ] You want ? 1292 01:23:29,822 --> 01:23:32,222 Thanks. 1293 01:23:32,342 --> 01:23:36,302 So, you sure you don't want to go sailing with us ? It'll be fun. 1294 01:23:36,422 --> 01:23:38,222 No, I'm fine. 1295 01:23:39,742 --> 01:23:44,702 Look, I don't know if I ever thanked you for going last night, 1296 01:23:44,862 --> 01:23:47,022 but it really meant a lot to me. 1297 01:23:49,302 --> 01:23:51,142 I'm glad. 1298 01:23:52,662 --> 01:23:54,862 - Hey. - Hey. 1299 01:23:54,982 --> 01:23:58,022 - You ready ? - Mm-mm. 1300 01:23:58,102 --> 01:24:00,302 - See you later. - Bye. 1301 01:24:01,902 --> 01:24:04,622 - ls-- ls she okay ? - I hope so. 1302 01:24:07,742 --> 01:24:09,542 [ Door Closes ] 1303 01:24:10,902 --> 01:24:12,782 Where's your sister going ? 1304 01:24:12,902 --> 01:24:17,262 She's meeting some bikers, big ones, full of sperm. 1305 01:24:18,462 --> 01:24:21,142 Funny. 1306 01:24:21,262 --> 01:24:23,702 So, tell me about this dance. Was it hoppin' ? 1307 01:24:23,862 --> 01:24:26,422 Parts of it. 1308 01:24:26,542 --> 01:24:27,822 Which parts ? 1309 01:24:27,942 --> 01:24:31,022 The part where Bianca beat the hell out of some guy. 1310 01:24:31,142 --> 01:24:36,462 - Bianca did what ? - What's the matter, upset that I rubbed off on her ? 1311 01:24:36,582 --> 01:24:40,022 No, impressed. 1312 01:24:42,742 --> 01:24:46,742 Fathers don't like to admit it when their daughters are capable of running their own lives. 1313 01:24:46,902 --> 01:24:48,982 It means we've become spectators. 1314 01:24:52,062 --> 01:24:55,982 Bianca still lets me play a few innings. You've had me on the bench for years. 1315 01:24:57,702 --> 01:25:01,742 And when you go to Sarah Lawrence l won't even be able to watch the game. 1316 01:25:03,422 --> 01:25:05,262 When I go ? 1317 01:25:06,902 --> 01:25:10,462 Oh, boy. Don't tell me you changed your mind. 1318 01:25:10,622 --> 01:25:12,702 l already sent 'em a cheque. 1319 01:25:28,902 --> 01:25:32,182 All right, I assume everyone has found time to complete their poem, 1320 01:25:32,302 --> 01:25:34,062 except for Mr Donner, 1321 01:25:34,182 --> 01:25:36,342 [ Laughing ] who has an excuse. 1322 01:25:38,582 --> 01:25:40,622 Shaft, lose the glasses. 1323 01:25:44,182 --> 01:25:47,542 All right, anyone brave enough to read theirs aloud ? 1324 01:25:54,462 --> 01:25:56,262 l will. 1325 01:25:59,102 --> 01:26:01,262 Lord, here we go. 1326 01:26:05,822 --> 01:26:07,622 [ Clears Throat ] 1327 01:26:09,142 --> 01:26:12,302 ''l hate the way you talk to me and the way you cut your hair. 1328 01:26:12,462 --> 01:26:16,622 ''l hate the way you drive my car. l hate it when you stare. 1329 01:26:16,742 --> 01:26:20,382 ''l hate your big dumb combat boots and the way you read my mind. 1330 01:26:20,542 --> 01:26:25,542 ''l hate you so much it makes me sick. It even makes me rhyme. 1331 01:26:25,662 --> 01:26:28,942 [ Sighs ] ''l hate it-- l hate the way you're always right. 1332 01:26:29,062 --> 01:26:31,222 ''l hate it when you lie. 1333 01:26:31,342 --> 01:26:34,942 ''l hate it when you make me laugh, even worse when you make me cry. 1334 01:26:36,742 --> 01:26:40,462 ''l hate it when you're not around and the fact that you didn't call. 1335 01:26:40,582 --> 01:26:44,142 ''But mostly, I hate the way l don't hate you, not even close, 1336 01:26:44,262 --> 01:26:47,022 not even a little bit, not even at all.'' 1337 01:26:59,302 --> 01:27:01,502 [ Door Opens ] 1338 01:27:01,662 --> 01:27:03,422 [ Door Closes ] 1339 01:27:27,902 --> 01:27:31,182 - Nice, huh ? - A Fender Strat ? 1340 01:27:31,302 --> 01:27:33,102 ls it for me ? 1341 01:27:33,222 --> 01:27:36,662 Yeah, I thought you could use it, you know, when you start your band. 1342 01:27:36,822 --> 01:27:39,382 Besides, l had some extra cash, you know. 1343 01:27:39,542 --> 01:27:42,262 Some asshole paid me to take out this really great girl. 1344 01:27:44,142 --> 01:27:45,942 ls that right ? 1345 01:27:46,062 --> 01:27:50,262 Yeah, but I screwed up. l, um-- I fell for her. 1346 01:27:51,702 --> 01:27:53,462 Really ? 1347 01:27:53,622 --> 01:27:57,782 It's not everyday you find a girl who'll flash someone to get you out of detention. 1348 01:27:59,902 --> 01:28:02,222 Oh, God. 1349 01:28:09,222 --> 01:28:13,062 You can't just buy me a guitar every time you screw up, you know. 1350 01:28:13,142 --> 01:28:15,502 Yeah, I know. 1351 01:28:15,622 --> 01:28:19,182 But there's always drums and bass and maybe even one day a tambourine. 1352 01:28:25,942 --> 01:28:28,262 And don't just think you can-- 1353 01:28:28,342 --> 01:28:31,822 I want you to want me 1354 01:28:31,942 --> 01:28:36,262 I need you to need me 1355 01:28:36,342 --> 01:28:40,302 l'd love you to love me 1356 01:28:40,462 --> 01:28:45,142 I'm beggin' you to beg me 1357 01:28:45,262 --> 01:28:47,422 Shine up my old brown shoes 1358 01:28:47,582 --> 01:28:49,702 I put on a brand-new shirt 1359 01:28:49,822 --> 01:28:51,622 I'll get home early from work 1360 01:28:51,742 --> 01:28:55,062 lf you say that you love me 1361 01:28:55,182 --> 01:28:58,702 Didn't l, didn't l didn't I see you cryin' 1362 01:28:58,822 --> 01:29:03,822 Oh, didn't l, didn't l didn't I see you cryin' 1363 01:29:03,902 --> 01:29:05,422 Feelin' all alone without a friend 1364 01:29:05,622 --> 01:29:07,502 You know you feel like dyin' 1365 01:29:07,622 --> 01:29:12,462 Oh, didn't l, didn't l didn't I see you cryin' 1366 01:29:12,582 --> 01:29:16,622 I want you to want me 1367 01:29:16,782 --> 01:29:21,022 I need you to need me 1368 01:29:21,142 --> 01:29:25,102 l'd love you to love me 1369 01:29:25,182 --> 01:29:30,022 I'm beggin' you to beg me 1370 01:29:30,102 --> 01:29:32,182 Shine up my old brown shoes 1371 01:29:32,302 --> 01:29:34,422 I put on a brand-new shirt 1372 01:29:34,582 --> 01:29:36,342 I'll get home early from work 1373 01:29:36,502 --> 01:29:40,942 lf you say that you love me 1374 01:29:41,062 --> 01:29:44,782 Didn't l, didn't l didn't I see you cryin' 1375 01:29:44,902 --> 01:29:49,862 Oh, didn't l, didn't l didn't I see you cryin' 1376 01:29:49,942 --> 01:29:53,582 Feelin' all alone without a friend you know you feel like dyin' 1377 01:29:53,742 --> 01:29:58,462 Oh, didn't l, didn't l didn't I see you cryin' 1378 01:29:58,622 --> 01:30:00,622 Hey ! 1379 01:30:07,702 --> 01:30:11,262 Feelin' all alone without a friend you know you feel like dyin' 1380 01:30:11,422 --> 01:30:16,062 Oh, didn't l, didn't l didn't I see you cryin' 1381 01:30:25,222 --> 01:30:29,422 I want you to want me 1382 01:30:29,582 --> 01:30:33,862 I need you to need me 1383 01:30:33,942 --> 01:30:37,822 l'd love you to love me 1384 01:30:37,942 --> 01:30:42,782 I'm beggin' you to beg me 1385 01:30:42,902 --> 01:30:47,062 I want you to want me 1386 01:30:47,182 --> 01:30:50,262 I want you to want me 1387 01:30:52,462 --> 01:30:56,942 No offence. I know everyone ''digs'' your sister and all, but, um-- 1388 01:30:57,022 --> 01:30:59,182 she's without. 1389 01:31:00,662 --> 01:31:05,782 You know, you're not as vile as I thought you were. 1390 01:31:11,062 --> 01:31:13,422 [ Both Laughing ] 1391 01:31:13,542 --> 01:31:16,142 You suck. 1392 01:31:16,262 --> 01:31:19,862 Okay. Let's go ! 1393 01:31:21,582 --> 01:31:23,502 You're just messin' with me, aren't you ? 1394 01:31:23,622 --> 01:31:26,702 - No, I'm really looking forward to doing it. - Go see Miss Perky. 1395 01:31:26,822 --> 01:31:29,382 - What ? - Go. Perky's. Go, now. 1396 01:31:29,502 --> 01:31:32,262 [ Director ] Once again. ''Perky, now'' is the second one. 1397 01:31:32,342 --> 01:31:34,902 - Perky's now. Perky's, now. - Right away. 1398 01:31:35,022 --> 01:31:36,822 - Now, Perky's. - Hey, hey. 1399 01:31:36,942 --> 01:31:39,822 - Now, Perky's. Perky's now. - At the beginning of the shot. 1400 01:31:39,902 --> 01:31:42,222 Perk-- Oh. 1401 01:31:44,342 --> 01:31:47,662 Bianca, let's go. We're all congregating around Mr Cuervo. 1402 01:31:47,782 --> 01:31:50,422 Um, I'll see you around, okay ? 1403 01:32:00,862 --> 01:32:03,622 Don't worry. There's better for you... 1404 01:32:03,742 --> 01:32:05,822 and it's right here. 1405 01:32:05,942 --> 01:32:09,742 - Come here. No, I wanted you for so long. - [ Crew Laughing ] 1406 01:32:09,902 --> 01:32:13,422 You messed with the wrong guy, and now you're gonna pay. 1407 01:32:13,542 --> 01:32:15,822 You and that little bitch. 1408 01:32:17,182 --> 01:32:20,862 All right, that's enough, okay ! You crossed the line. 1409 01:32:25,302 --> 01:32:27,182 What, are you kidding me ? 1410 01:32:27,262 --> 01:32:29,102 [ Bleeping ] 1411 01:32:32,302 --> 01:32:35,542 - I'm driving, so I pick the tunes. - And it's my car. 1412 01:32:35,702 --> 01:32:38,222 [ Screaming ] 1413 01:32:38,342 --> 01:32:41,102 l want some coffee ! 1414 01:32:53,622 --> 01:32:56,382 Could I get a prophylactic ? 1415 01:32:56,542 --> 01:32:59,622 A prophylactic. Ahhhh. 1416 01:32:59,742 --> 01:33:03,222 - Let go ! - How could you set me up like that ? 1417 01:33:03,342 --> 01:33:05,102 Oh, God, I just wanted-- 1418 01:33:05,222 --> 01:33:07,822 To completely damage me, send me to therapy forever ? 1419 01:33:07,902 --> 01:33:09,862 - Ow ! No, I just wanted-- - Ladies. 1420 01:33:09,942 --> 01:33:12,262 [ Whimpering ]