1 00:00:59,184 --> 00:01:00,978 One, two, three.... 2 00:01:01,019 --> 00:01:02,437 Hold up. 3 00:01:04,231 --> 00:01:06,233 Here's the story about a man 4 00:01:07,359 --> 00:01:08,735 A simple man 5 00:01:09,611 --> 00:01:13,365 A man with a dream To do the world some good 6 00:01:13,699 --> 00:01:16,034 Here's a story for rich and poor 7 00:01:16,702 --> 00:01:18,245 For young and for old 8 00:01:18,704 --> 00:01:22,749 About a man from the 'hood Trying to do the world some good 9 00:01:23,167 --> 00:01:25,294 Here's the story about a man 10 00:01:26,211 --> 00:01:27,629 An everyday man 11 00:01:28,589 --> 00:01:31,049 A man with a dream 12 00:01:31,133 --> 00:01:33,302 To be the head of state 13 00:01:39,016 --> 00:01:41,685 Alderman Gilliam's office. What are you upset about? 14 00:01:41,727 --> 00:01:44,021 It's not a black-owned business? 15 00:01:44,062 --> 00:01:47,566 -But it's a Chinese food restaurant. -So, what's with the fried rice? 16 00:01:47,649 --> 00:01:50,777 I know it's fried rice, but it's not "fried" rice. 17 00:01:51,320 --> 00:01:52,863 Alderman Gilliam's office. 18 00:01:52,905 --> 00:01:55,240 Kim. How is it going, honey? 19 00:01:55,282 --> 00:01:56,909 -Got tickets to the symphony. -Really? 20 00:01:56,992 --> 00:02:00,746 -Hold on a second, I got another call. -You better not put me on hold. 21 00:02:00,787 --> 00:02:03,373 Vote for Gaines and James. 22 00:02:03,415 --> 00:02:07,252 -The Million Babies Mamas March? -It's a very good cause. 23 00:02:07,336 --> 00:02:09,796 Call Reverend Barton for that one. No... 24 00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:13,383 you can't use food stamps to buy tires. 25 00:02:14,593 --> 00:02:17,054 I'm sorry, Mr. Hawkins. What can I do for you? 26 00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:18,597 Your girlfriend is on hold. 27 00:02:18,639 --> 00:02:20,933 -Hold on a second. -How could you put me on hold? 28 00:02:20,974 --> 00:02:23,769 -What was it, Mr. Hawkins? -The bus. 29 00:02:23,852 --> 00:02:26,563 I read that they're going to shut down our bus line. 30 00:02:26,605 --> 00:02:28,941 If they do that, I can't get to work! 31 00:02:29,024 --> 00:02:31,818 Unless they give me a job in that new mall they're building. 32 00:02:31,902 --> 00:02:34,613 Don't worry. I've been talking to the people downtown... 33 00:02:34,696 --> 00:02:36,240 and I promise you this: 34 00:02:36,281 --> 00:02:39,952 If they shut down this bus line, I will drive you to work myself. 35 00:02:40,327 --> 00:02:41,912 You got my word. 36 00:02:43,372 --> 00:02:45,624 Alderman Gilliam, quick! Miss Pearl is back! 37 00:02:45,707 --> 00:02:47,125 Okay. I got to go. 38 00:02:53,298 --> 00:02:58,262 Hi, that's me, Mays Gilliam, alderman of the 9th Ward of Washington, D.C. 39 00:02:58,595 --> 00:03:00,931 Not the part of D.C. you're familiar with. 40 00:03:00,973 --> 00:03:05,185 I work in a neighborhood so bad, you can get shot while you're getting shot. 41 00:03:05,477 --> 00:03:09,815 Around here when people have a problem, they don't call the mayor, they call me. 42 00:03:15,821 --> 00:03:16,947 Miss Pearl! 43 00:03:18,657 --> 00:03:20,242 What's going on? 44 00:03:22,786 --> 00:03:25,789 Dionne is in the house. I know she is. 45 00:03:25,831 --> 00:03:29,793 I don't know what she's talking about. We checked the house, nobody is in there. 46 00:03:29,835 --> 00:03:31,962 Hey, man, Dionne is her cat. 47 00:03:32,004 --> 00:03:34,673 Whatever. Cats got nine lives. She'll be fine. 48 00:03:34,756 --> 00:03:37,593 Can we let one guy go in and help this lady get her cat? 49 00:03:37,676 --> 00:03:41,013 Can't do it. Once they laid the explosives, there's nothing I can do. 50 00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:42,139 She just showed up. 51 00:03:42,181 --> 00:03:45,309 You took the lady's house. Can you at least let her get her cat? 52 00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:47,477 We didn't take it, we gave her $40,000. 53 00:03:47,519 --> 00:03:51,356 What kind of house is she supposed to get with $40,000? A crack house? 54 00:03:51,398 --> 00:03:53,650 I think she'd be happy to get out of this rattrap. 55 00:03:53,692 --> 00:03:56,236 Who are you to call this place a rattrap? 56 00:03:56,320 --> 00:04:00,574 This is my neighborhood, where I'm from. I got my first bike stolen right there. 57 00:04:00,657 --> 00:04:02,826 My daddy got his bike stolen right there. 58 00:04:02,868 --> 00:04:06,997 When I have a son, I hope he's fortunate enough to get stuck up right there. 59 00:04:07,039 --> 00:04:09,750 -Can't you let somebody go check? -We already looked. 60 00:04:09,833 --> 00:04:12,044 There's nothing in there. We got work to do. 61 00:04:12,127 --> 00:04:13,879 Leave the people alone, damn it! 62 00:04:13,921 --> 00:04:15,714 -Let's get this thing going. -Come on. 63 00:04:15,756 --> 00:04:18,550 -Stop being in such a hurry. -We've been here all morning. 64 00:04:18,634 --> 00:04:20,552 Let the lady go inside. 65 00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:23,514 Come on, baby! Sugar baby. 66 00:04:24,306 --> 00:04:27,100 Could you at least turn it off? Let the lady get her cat. 67 00:04:27,184 --> 00:04:30,562 Dionne, baby? I got something for you! 68 00:04:32,689 --> 00:04:33,982 Miss Pearl, no! 69 00:04:36,568 --> 00:04:39,780 All right, turn it off. Wait till this woman gets her cat. 70 00:04:39,905 --> 00:04:41,365 Shit, it's not working! 71 00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:42,616 Turn it off! 72 00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:45,494 She better get out, it's going to blow! 73 00:04:45,786 --> 00:04:48,247 Miss Pearl! Come out! 74 00:04:49,414 --> 00:04:50,415 No, Mays! 75 00:04:52,084 --> 00:04:53,836 You've only got a minute! 76 00:04:56,713 --> 00:04:58,799 -Fix it! Get to work. -I'm trying. 77 00:04:59,216 --> 00:05:00,717 Get a union man on this. 78 00:05:01,260 --> 00:05:02,845 Get your ass out! 79 00:05:05,806 --> 00:05:09,893 Miss Pearl, we got to get out of here. They're going to blow this place up. 80 00:05:10,519 --> 00:05:13,939 They wouldn't do that, baby! They know we're in here. 81 00:05:14,481 --> 00:05:18,235 I love you, I've known you a long time. You've seen a lot in your life. 82 00:05:18,277 --> 00:05:21,280 You've seen churches burnt to the ground, dogs sicced on kids... 83 00:05:21,363 --> 00:05:23,615 you've seen Malcolm X and JFK killed. 84 00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:25,742 They shut up Muhammad Ali and Richard Pryor. 85 00:05:25,784 --> 00:05:28,495 They gave Magic Johnson AIDS, turned Michael Jackson white. 86 00:05:28,579 --> 00:05:31,874 Do you really think these people give a damn about you? 87 00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:56,732 We interrupt the Jay-Z song to bring you this special bulletin. 88 00:05:56,815 --> 00:05:58,901 Presidential candidate Senator Gaines... 89 00:05:58,984 --> 00:06:00,903 and his running mate, General Olson James... 90 00:06:00,986 --> 00:06:03,947 were both killed when their planes crashed into each other. 91 00:06:04,031 --> 00:06:07,159 We now return you to the Jay-Z song already in progress. 92 00:06:26,053 --> 00:06:27,054 What's up? 93 00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:30,474 Trying to be like you, hero! What's up, man? Saving kittens? 94 00:06:30,516 --> 00:06:31,975 Don't steal my car now. 95 00:06:32,017 --> 00:06:36,104 I don't want that garbage. What will I do, feed your car to my car? 96 00:06:37,105 --> 00:06:40,776 Let me get ten Nine Lives, four Lucky Ducks, two Straight Pokers... 97 00:06:40,859 --> 00:06:42,986 three Crabpots and five Powerballs. 98 00:06:43,779 --> 00:06:45,697 Thank you, here you go. 99 00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:52,871 You all need to stop. 100 00:06:58,418 --> 00:07:00,254 Why are all these people clapping? 101 00:07:00,337 --> 00:07:02,923 -You didn't see me on the news? -No, I didn't. 102 00:07:03,090 --> 00:07:05,050 I got meat! 103 00:07:05,217 --> 00:07:08,846 More beef than East Coast, West Coast rap. Check it out! 104 00:07:09,847 --> 00:07:12,099 Superman! Saving lives and stuff. 105 00:07:12,182 --> 00:07:14,393 Why don't you cop one of these pork chops? 106 00:07:14,476 --> 00:07:17,729 Know what you need to do? You need to leave. I won't tell you again. 107 00:07:17,771 --> 00:07:21,108 Nobody wants your meat. Who the hell wants to buy stolen meat? 108 00:07:21,191 --> 00:07:23,569 -I'll take a T-bone. -You like gizzards, too? 109 00:07:26,488 --> 00:07:29,241 Did you hear about that guy running for President? 110 00:07:29,283 --> 00:07:30,909 Who will replace him? 111 00:07:30,993 --> 00:07:33,912 Maybe they should get Shaq. Nobody can beat him. 112 00:07:33,954 --> 00:07:36,373 Are you getting gas? You're holding my line up. 113 00:07:36,415 --> 00:07:37,791 Yeah, I'm sorry. 114 00:07:38,542 --> 00:07:39,710 $10 on three. 115 00:07:50,387 --> 00:07:52,848 You've got a lot of nerve hanging up on me. 116 00:07:52,931 --> 00:07:54,057 Hanging up? 117 00:07:54,183 --> 00:07:57,436 -What's going on? -I'm leaving you! That's what's going on. 118 00:07:57,519 --> 00:08:01,356 The only reason I accepted this engagement ring from you in the first place... 119 00:08:01,440 --> 00:08:04,276 is because I thought you had potential! 120 00:08:04,359 --> 00:08:06,612 I thought you wanted more! 121 00:08:06,945 --> 00:08:10,324 Why can't you just play the game? Wear a suit! 122 00:08:10,616 --> 00:08:12,492 Be a real politician! 123 00:08:12,576 --> 00:08:15,871 What's my clothes have to do with.... Are you seeing somebody else? 124 00:08:15,954 --> 00:08:17,956 I'm seeing everybody else! 125 00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:21,668 I've met mosquitoes with more force than you. 126 00:08:21,752 --> 00:08:25,714 I'm tired of your little games, tired of being your little secretary. 127 00:08:25,797 --> 00:08:27,883 Here's the light bill. I didn't pay it. 128 00:08:27,966 --> 00:08:30,385 Here's the cable bill. I didn't pay that, either. 129 00:08:30,469 --> 00:08:33,096 And here's the bill for your car note. 130 00:08:33,388 --> 00:08:35,140 I hope they take it! 131 00:08:35,933 --> 00:08:38,143 Wait a minute, that's my car! 132 00:08:38,477 --> 00:08:39,937 Wait, come back! 133 00:08:41,230 --> 00:08:43,857 I hate that piece of shit! 134 00:08:44,900 --> 00:08:48,862 I'm tired of spending my time waiting for you to quit acting like a child... 135 00:08:48,946 --> 00:08:52,241 and act like a grown man for a change, Mays! 136 00:08:52,491 --> 00:08:54,493 I need to get on with my life! 137 00:08:54,535 --> 00:08:56,870 I want a house, I want children! 138 00:08:56,954 --> 00:09:00,082 I want to go on vacation! You're horrible in bed! 139 00:09:00,666 --> 00:09:03,585 I am tired of being engaged. I am tired of being-- 140 00:09:07,840 --> 00:09:10,342 I wish you would. 141 00:09:14,805 --> 00:09:17,266 For the last time, I'm not running for President. 142 00:09:17,349 --> 00:09:21,395 I'm not crazy! Gaines was 20 points behind. It's ten weeks to Election Day. 143 00:09:21,478 --> 00:09:22,646 Damn it! 144 00:09:22,855 --> 00:09:26,483 They should have known better than to talk on a cell phone in a plane. 145 00:09:26,525 --> 00:09:28,819 -What about Sanderson? -That's a joke. 146 00:09:28,861 --> 00:09:31,154 Lewis has been Vice-President for eight years. 147 00:09:31,196 --> 00:09:33,824 He's a war hero and Sharon Stone's cousin. He can't lose. 148 00:09:33,907 --> 00:09:35,617 -What about Mosley? -Girls. 149 00:09:35,701 --> 00:09:36,827 -Connelly? -Boys. 150 00:09:36,910 --> 00:09:38,745 -McMasters? -Big boys. 151 00:09:38,829 --> 00:09:41,206 So we concede the election to Lewis? 152 00:09:41,248 --> 00:09:45,335 Nobody is talking about conceding, Debra, but let's get real here. 153 00:09:45,502 --> 00:09:47,087 We'll lose this one. 154 00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:51,341 The thing to do is to set the party up for the next election. 155 00:09:51,508 --> 00:09:54,595 We need a candidate that will put on a good show. 156 00:09:54,678 --> 00:09:58,056 This isn't a circus, it's a presidential election. 157 00:09:58,640 --> 00:10:00,642 You can't just pick some guy... 158 00:10:01,310 --> 00:10:03,562 to run for President. 159 00:10:03,604 --> 00:10:06,899 It's unprecedented, but if I put in a call to the party chairman... 160 00:10:06,940 --> 00:10:09,151 we find a candidate, he'll back him. 161 00:10:09,693 --> 00:10:12,029 Who will run a race they know they can't win? 162 00:10:12,070 --> 00:10:13,572 Who says he has to know? 163 00:10:22,331 --> 00:10:23,499 What the.... 164 00:10:34,927 --> 00:10:36,220 What now? 165 00:10:40,015 --> 00:10:41,600 No, not my bike! 166 00:10:47,523 --> 00:10:50,484 When I went in there I wasn't thinking about being a hero. 167 00:10:50,567 --> 00:10:52,819 I was just trying to help Miss Pearl. 168 00:10:52,903 --> 00:10:54,238 Miss Pearl. 169 00:10:54,863 --> 00:10:56,615 I think we found our man. 170 00:10:57,115 --> 00:10:58,951 Look at this! This is great! 171 00:10:59,243 --> 00:11:01,245 This is America, see? 172 00:11:01,662 --> 00:11:04,832 Little guy against the big guy, corporations against the people. 173 00:11:04,915 --> 00:11:06,792 Young versus old. What's better than this? 174 00:11:06,875 --> 00:11:08,669 Give me a break! 175 00:11:08,877 --> 00:11:11,421 I am going to run an alderman for President? 176 00:11:12,589 --> 00:11:14,383 He's not an alderman. 177 00:11:14,633 --> 00:11:16,051 He's a hero. 178 00:11:17,052 --> 00:11:20,097 -Who doesn't like a hero? -Big business loves a hero! 179 00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:21,348 See? 180 00:11:21,431 --> 00:11:23,809 You said we needed somebody who can help the party. 181 00:11:23,892 --> 00:11:26,728 Now, how in the hell does this guy help the party? 182 00:11:26,895 --> 00:11:28,355 I'm glad you asked. 183 00:11:28,981 --> 00:11:31,483 The United States is changing. America is changing. 184 00:11:31,567 --> 00:11:33,652 Inside of 20 years, you know the numbers... 185 00:11:33,735 --> 00:11:37,656 20 percent black, 21 percent Asian, 39 percent Hispanic. 186 00:11:37,698 --> 00:11:41,869 The minorities will be the majority. The smartest thing we can do... 187 00:11:42,035 --> 00:11:46,498 is be the first party to nominate a minority for President. 188 00:11:46,665 --> 00:11:49,501 -How about a cripple? -I don't think so, Charlie. 189 00:11:50,002 --> 00:11:54,131 Now, we'll lose, of course, but the minorities will be happy. 190 00:11:54,631 --> 00:11:59,303 The minorities will be happy and they will vote for us in 2008... 191 00:11:59,469 --> 00:12:01,305 because we've shown we support them. 192 00:12:01,346 --> 00:12:03,974 And the white people will vote for us... 193 00:12:04,349 --> 00:12:06,852 -because our guy isn't black. -You got my vote! 194 00:12:06,935 --> 00:12:10,439 Geller, see if you can track down this Mays Gilliam. 195 00:12:12,733 --> 00:12:14,610 Go check our accounts. 196 00:12:24,328 --> 00:12:27,664 Give me one good reason why I should go along with this. 197 00:12:27,706 --> 00:12:31,543 Don't you get it, Debra? I intend to run for President in 2008. 198 00:12:33,545 --> 00:12:36,673 Now give me one reason why you shouldn't. 199 00:12:40,844 --> 00:12:42,679 He would take a lot of work. 200 00:12:43,055 --> 00:12:45,057 We can run a background check... 201 00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:47,309 but it's obvious he's not a party line candidate. 202 00:12:47,392 --> 00:12:50,062 He's just some kid who thinks he can make a difference. 203 00:12:50,145 --> 00:12:53,023 Don't worry. Go out there, put the machine behind him. 204 00:12:53,065 --> 00:12:56,026 You get 25 points in the polls, consider it a win. 205 00:12:56,527 --> 00:12:58,612 Make sure he doesn't embarrass us. 206 00:12:58,695 --> 00:13:01,281 After this is over, we get to work. 207 00:13:02,658 --> 00:13:05,953 When I'm President, I'll take care of you. 208 00:13:08,330 --> 00:13:10,499 Help me. They locked me out of my office. 209 00:13:10,582 --> 00:13:13,293 I know. The mayor is fed up with you. 210 00:13:14,503 --> 00:13:17,756 How many times have I told you? You got to quit trying to fix shit. 211 00:13:17,798 --> 00:13:20,926 I could've got you into the council next term. Now you're red-lined. 212 00:13:21,009 --> 00:13:22,761 Shannon is taking over your district. 213 00:13:22,845 --> 00:13:26,306 They need to smooth over the mall situation, that bus thing is heating up. 214 00:13:26,390 --> 00:13:29,393 -They don't trust you. -I'm not the one stealing people's houses. 215 00:13:29,476 --> 00:13:32,563 That's what your problem is. You got to work with us. 216 00:13:33,605 --> 00:13:36,233 That shit you pulled over there cost the city money. 217 00:13:36,275 --> 00:13:38,277 Makes the mayor look bad. 218 00:13:38,610 --> 00:13:43,240 Now, contrary to popular belief, politics is no place to express yourself. 219 00:13:43,448 --> 00:13:45,576 You want to get in, you got to fit in. 220 00:13:45,742 --> 00:13:48,662 And look at you. Grow up, you got to dress better. 221 00:13:48,745 --> 00:13:51,373 Even Puff Daddy wears a suit to court. 222 00:13:54,084 --> 00:13:56,753 I'm sorry, brother, but ain't nothing I can do. 223 00:14:00,340 --> 00:14:02,509 -Nice car. -Ain't it, though? 224 00:14:02,634 --> 00:14:05,137 Got it for a song at a repo auction. 225 00:14:27,910 --> 00:14:30,329 He feels bad, mighty low 226 00:14:30,412 --> 00:14:32,247 Got nowhere to go 227 00:14:32,664 --> 00:14:35,000 What can you do when you're feeling low 228 00:14:35,083 --> 00:14:37,085 Man, I want to know 229 00:14:37,377 --> 00:14:41,173 He feels bad, mighty low Got nowhere to go 230 00:14:41,507 --> 00:14:44,635 What can you do when you're feeling low 231 00:14:45,010 --> 00:14:47,471 And your car just got repo'd 232 00:15:16,458 --> 00:15:17,876 Here we are. 233 00:15:18,043 --> 00:15:20,254 Mays Gilliam, Debra Lassiter. 234 00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:24,132 Nice to meet you. Take a seat. 235 00:15:29,888 --> 00:15:32,975 We know what happened today. We know you lost your job. 236 00:15:34,351 --> 00:15:36,353 How do you know that? It just happened. 237 00:15:36,395 --> 00:15:38,814 We're the government. We know everything. 238 00:15:39,606 --> 00:15:41,859 We'd like you to do something for us. 239 00:15:41,900 --> 00:15:45,445 Sure, I'd love to work on a presidential campaign. 240 00:15:45,904 --> 00:15:48,574 I'll make phone calls, send out fliers. 241 00:15:49,283 --> 00:15:51,785 Who have you guys chosen to run against Lewis? 242 00:15:51,869 --> 00:15:54,746 That's exactly what we wanted to talk to you about. 243 00:15:54,913 --> 00:15:58,208 We'd like you to run for President. 244 00:16:04,923 --> 00:16:07,801 -Of what? -The United States. 245 00:16:08,760 --> 00:16:10,804 -Of what? -Of America. 246 00:16:11,221 --> 00:16:12,222 Which America? 247 00:16:12,264 --> 00:16:13,515 North... 248 00:16:13,932 --> 00:16:15,601 America, Mays. 249 00:16:15,809 --> 00:16:17,394 Get out of here! 250 00:16:17,769 --> 00:16:19,354 We're not joking. 251 00:16:20,189 --> 00:16:23,192 We want you to be the nominee for the office of President... 252 00:16:23,275 --> 00:16:25,611 of the United States of America. 253 00:16:30,949 --> 00:16:32,784 Let me get this straight. 254 00:16:32,868 --> 00:16:36,788 You guys couldn't find anybody else to run? You couldn't find nobody? 255 00:16:36,955 --> 00:16:38,457 Something is wrong here. 256 00:16:38,540 --> 00:16:40,626 You couldn't find a congressman... 257 00:16:40,709 --> 00:16:43,337 a senator? I'm just an alderman. 258 00:16:43,462 --> 00:16:47,257 Congressmen, senators, they work with other politicians. 259 00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:50,302 You're an alderman. You work with the people. 260 00:16:50,385 --> 00:16:53,805 And that's what we want, a man of the people. 261 00:16:53,889 --> 00:16:55,557 This is a big joke, right? 262 00:16:55,641 --> 00:16:57,726 They've got a hidden camera somewhere. 263 00:16:57,809 --> 00:17:01,146 You all will get a big laugh out of this. You know what? I don't care. 264 00:17:01,188 --> 00:17:04,650 One of you all will drive me home because my bike is messed up. 265 00:17:05,275 --> 00:17:06,777 You an American? 266 00:17:09,238 --> 00:17:11,782 -Are you an American? -Yes. 267 00:17:13,325 --> 00:17:16,036 This isn't just an election. It's a moment. 268 00:17:16,245 --> 00:17:19,706 This is the moment when you have the opportunity to show boys and girls... 269 00:17:19,790 --> 00:17:22,125 men and women, what America is about. 270 00:17:23,126 --> 00:17:24,586 Look at that. 271 00:17:25,921 --> 00:17:30,801 When I see that, I think of our forefathers fighting to make this country what it is. 272 00:17:31,468 --> 00:17:36,139 When I see it I think about the guy who has to scrub Lincoln's balls for minimum wage. 273 00:17:36,765 --> 00:17:40,310 That's why we want you. You care about the little people. 274 00:17:41,186 --> 00:17:42,563 What will it be? 275 00:17:58,745 --> 00:18:00,497 It gives me great honor... 276 00:18:00,706 --> 00:18:03,041 to accept the party's nomination... 277 00:18:03,125 --> 00:18:04,543 for President... 278 00:18:04,626 --> 00:18:07,504 of the United States of America. 279 00:18:08,338 --> 00:18:09,339 No! 280 00:18:16,138 --> 00:18:18,765 Welcome to your campaign headquarters. 281 00:18:19,266 --> 00:18:22,811 These folks will do everything they can to help you get elected. 282 00:18:22,978 --> 00:18:24,646 These are your people. 283 00:18:25,731 --> 00:18:27,733 Here. Let's take a look at this. 284 00:18:27,774 --> 00:18:30,485 Mark, is that cued up? Roll it, please. 285 00:18:38,202 --> 00:18:40,287 This is a great spot. 286 00:18:41,413 --> 00:18:45,709 If you love America, vote Mays Gilliam for President. 287 00:18:50,756 --> 00:18:52,090 But I'm not in it. 288 00:18:53,091 --> 00:18:54,426 You don't even see my face. 289 00:18:54,510 --> 00:18:56,762 It's a template. We'll get you in there eventually. 290 00:18:56,803 --> 00:18:59,306 There's a couple of people I want you to meet. 291 00:18:59,389 --> 00:19:02,351 This is your security director, Mr. Earl. 292 00:19:02,434 --> 00:19:05,103 -You'll be in good hands. -Pleased to meet you, sir. 293 00:19:05,187 --> 00:19:09,441 If you're in trouble, yell "Security!" and my people will handle the situation. 294 00:19:09,608 --> 00:19:13,028 This is your decoy, Mays Junior. He enters events before you. 295 00:19:13,111 --> 00:19:15,948 If anything'll happen to you, it'll happen to him first. 296 00:19:15,989 --> 00:19:18,158 Tupac could have used a guy like you. 297 00:19:18,242 --> 00:19:22,663 This is Nicollette White, she's your executive director of internal Liaisons. 298 00:19:22,746 --> 00:19:25,123 Call me Nikki. It will be a pleasure to serve you. 299 00:19:25,165 --> 00:19:28,293 I'm available to you around the clock, just let me know. 300 00:19:29,586 --> 00:19:32,798 -What does she do? -She sleeps with you. 301 00:19:33,298 --> 00:19:35,717 We got tired of getting caught up in sex scandals... 302 00:19:35,801 --> 00:19:38,428 so we commissioned our own team of super whores. 303 00:19:38,512 --> 00:19:40,180 You call yourself whores! 304 00:19:40,264 --> 00:19:42,182 Move that fat ass! One, two, three! 305 00:19:42,683 --> 00:19:45,477 -These girls are good. -Good morning, Mays. 306 00:19:45,644 --> 00:19:49,648 I took the liberty of choosing some options for this evening's fundraiser. 307 00:19:49,940 --> 00:19:51,066 You don't mind, do you? 308 00:19:51,149 --> 00:19:54,528 I'll wear whatever you need me to wear. What fundraiser is this? 309 00:19:54,611 --> 00:19:57,573 Your coming out party. Campaigns cost money. 310 00:19:57,656 --> 00:19:59,992 The people you meet tonight have plenty of it. 311 00:20:00,075 --> 00:20:02,119 Geller and I will advance the party... 312 00:20:02,161 --> 00:20:04,913 and Mr. Earl will bring you at 8:00 sharp. 313 00:20:05,164 --> 00:20:08,584 Here are your off-the-cuff remarks. Learn them. See you later. 314 00:20:17,259 --> 00:20:19,970 Remember, sir, just nod and move. Nod and move. 315 00:20:22,139 --> 00:20:23,974 What do you plan to do about taxes? 316 00:20:24,016 --> 00:20:26,518 Do you plan to support paternal leave incentives? 317 00:20:26,602 --> 00:20:28,645 Get my demo to somebody. Anybody. 318 00:20:29,354 --> 00:20:32,191 Don't take unscreened packages. Security reasons. 319 00:20:33,108 --> 00:20:35,485 You have some people to talk to. Tomorrow, work. 320 00:20:35,527 --> 00:20:38,030 Tonight, smile, shake hands, and be nice to the wives. 321 00:20:38,113 --> 00:20:41,533 I'll double-check the PA system. You'll make a brief statement at 11:00. 322 00:20:41,617 --> 00:20:42,868 Let's go. 323 00:20:51,502 --> 00:20:54,546 Hi, how are you doing? All right. You all right. 324 00:20:57,591 --> 00:21:00,385 -I wish you luck, sir. -Arigatou. 325 00:21:03,722 --> 00:21:06,850 It's like Timberland, and I got a bit of Missy moving up there... 326 00:21:06,892 --> 00:21:09,520 but I'm trying to go through that Neptune feel-- 327 00:21:09,561 --> 00:21:11,897 Excuse me, the Teamsters are here. 328 00:21:12,231 --> 00:21:14,274 What are you doing talking to the help? 329 00:21:14,358 --> 00:21:16,443 Gentlemen, Mr. Mays Gilliam. 330 00:21:16,527 --> 00:21:20,197 Guys, I'm all for labor, I'm all for unions. 331 00:21:20,280 --> 00:21:22,908 But you know and I know that you will endorse Lewis. 332 00:21:22,991 --> 00:21:25,536 It's business. We'll do what's best for the union. 333 00:21:25,619 --> 00:21:28,497 -Have you decided on a running mate? -We're thinking about it. 334 00:21:28,580 --> 00:21:32,209 -You should consider Sanders. -We're considering several options. 335 00:21:34,086 --> 00:21:35,212 Excuse me. 336 00:21:35,420 --> 00:21:36,630 Well, that depends. 337 00:21:36,713 --> 00:21:38,298 What's up with this guy? 338 00:21:38,382 --> 00:21:40,759 Track four. Check out track four. 339 00:21:46,974 --> 00:21:48,392 What do you have there? 340 00:21:48,433 --> 00:21:51,562 We got shrimp puffs and cheese snacks... 341 00:21:51,603 --> 00:21:54,731 -just some finger foods. -Thought that was you. 342 00:21:55,107 --> 00:21:57,442 So what's up with the two jobs? Bad credit? 343 00:21:57,526 --> 00:22:01,947 Why do I have to have bad credit? Can't I be saving up for a car or for school? 344 00:22:02,030 --> 00:22:04,575 Maybe I like to work? Excuse me. 345 00:22:05,450 --> 00:22:08,120 I'm sorry. You know what? I never got your name. 346 00:22:09,621 --> 00:22:13,000 Hey, Lisa Clark. Mays. Why you being so rude, Lisa Clark? 347 00:22:13,083 --> 00:22:15,085 I am not being rude, I am working. 348 00:22:15,169 --> 00:22:17,963 We can't mingle with the guests. Plus, I don't know you. 349 00:22:18,005 --> 00:22:20,632 -You know me. -No, I don't know you. 350 00:22:20,716 --> 00:22:21,842 But you know me. 351 00:22:21,925 --> 00:22:24,761 You've come to the gas station a couple of times... 352 00:22:24,803 --> 00:22:27,514 and I see you, but I don't know you. 353 00:22:27,598 --> 00:22:29,224 Let's get to know each other. 354 00:22:29,308 --> 00:22:30,934 -Let's dance. -I have to work. 355 00:22:30,976 --> 00:22:35,105 I know you're working. I'm working, too. So let's keep working. Want to dance? 356 00:22:35,147 --> 00:22:37,149 Okay, you'll get me in trouble. 357 00:22:44,323 --> 00:22:47,284 I cannot believe you got me out here like this. 358 00:22:47,493 --> 00:22:50,120 -Yeah, but you like it, right? -A little. 359 00:22:58,253 --> 00:22:59,796 I'm feeling it. 360 00:23:11,558 --> 00:23:13,268 Go ahead, girl, work it! 361 00:23:25,447 --> 00:23:28,700 Oh, my God. I'm having too much fun. I got to get back to work. 362 00:23:28,742 --> 00:23:30,410 No, come on, stay! 363 00:23:31,161 --> 00:23:32,287 Come on! 364 00:23:35,249 --> 00:23:38,001 Come on, brother, I know you know how to do this dance. 365 00:23:38,043 --> 00:23:39,419 No, sorry, I don't. 366 00:23:39,503 --> 00:23:42,673 I know you know how to do the Electric Slide. 367 00:23:42,840 --> 00:23:45,467 No, I can't say that I do. 368 00:23:46,301 --> 00:23:48,178 Get your ass in there! 369 00:23:53,058 --> 00:23:55,769 -What the hell is this? -Where's Mays? 370 00:23:58,480 --> 00:23:59,606 Over there. 371 00:24:01,066 --> 00:24:02,818 -Oh, my God! -We've got to stop him. 372 00:24:02,901 --> 00:24:04,278 Excuse us, please. 373 00:24:05,320 --> 00:24:09,366 I am getting so hot I am gonna take my clothes off 374 00:24:09,408 --> 00:24:12,035 -What do you think you're doing? -Stop it. 375 00:24:12,578 --> 00:24:15,080 I'm just trying to get the party started. 376 00:24:16,415 --> 00:24:18,417 Throw your hands in the air 377 00:24:18,500 --> 00:24:20,627 And wave them like you just don't care 378 00:24:20,711 --> 00:24:22,880 And if I got your vote for President 379 00:24:22,963 --> 00:24:25,174 Let me hear you say, "Oh, yeah" 380 00:24:27,843 --> 00:24:29,887 Shake that ass, Grandma! 381 00:24:30,304 --> 00:24:32,598 Let me see you bounce! 382 00:24:33,140 --> 00:24:34,433 Bounce! 383 00:24:35,225 --> 00:24:37,769 We got a couple of freaks over there. 384 00:24:40,230 --> 00:24:42,149 Let me see you shake! 385 00:24:44,776 --> 00:24:46,153 Crip walk! 386 00:24:56,955 --> 00:24:58,957 The roof is on fire! 387 00:25:00,250 --> 00:25:01,627 No, it's a saying! 388 00:25:04,630 --> 00:25:06,548 It's just a saying. Come back! 389 00:25:09,301 --> 00:25:13,430 You turned the party out. I have never seen anything like that. 390 00:25:13,555 --> 00:25:15,766 Great party. Too bad about the fire. 391 00:25:17,476 --> 00:25:20,604 -So, where are you off to now? -I'm not even sure. 392 00:25:20,687 --> 00:25:24,066 We start campaigning tomorrow. We'll be all over the country. 393 00:25:25,108 --> 00:25:26,276 Need a ride home? 394 00:25:26,360 --> 00:25:29,655 I still have to clean up. I don't know how long that will take me. 395 00:25:29,738 --> 00:25:31,198 I could wait. 396 00:25:31,824 --> 00:25:34,827 Are you sure? I could send a car to pick you up. 397 00:25:34,910 --> 00:25:37,037 No, thanks, but I got to go. 398 00:25:37,120 --> 00:25:38,789 It was good seeing you again. 399 00:25:38,872 --> 00:25:41,542 You too, buddy, old pal. 400 00:25:43,085 --> 00:25:45,629 -Can I get a good-night kiss? -No. 401 00:25:47,047 --> 00:25:49,132 -I'm coming! -She's coming! 402 00:25:49,842 --> 00:25:54,096 I got to go. Good luck, and call me if you get a chance. 403 00:25:56,682 --> 00:25:58,433 Didn't you see me talking? 404 00:25:58,934 --> 00:26:00,853 What kind of display was that? 405 00:26:00,936 --> 00:26:02,688 I was getting the party started. 406 00:26:02,729 --> 00:26:05,858 If the party needs to get started, I'll handle it. 407 00:26:06,275 --> 00:26:08,235 Just do what we say. 408 00:26:08,318 --> 00:26:11,530 I don't think everybody appreciated what you did in there. 409 00:26:11,613 --> 00:26:13,323 We really had a great time. 410 00:26:13,365 --> 00:26:15,492 It was off the hizzle for shizzle. 411 00:26:16,368 --> 00:26:18,996 -They liked it. -I don't care what they liked. 412 00:26:19,204 --> 00:26:20,831 Mays, darling! 413 00:26:25,836 --> 00:26:29,339 Darling, are you done yet? No? If not, it's okay. I can wait. 414 00:26:29,381 --> 00:26:32,676 But if we hurry, we'll be able to get a table at Jezebel's. 415 00:26:34,052 --> 00:26:36,180 Good evening. We're getting married. 416 00:26:37,097 --> 00:26:38,348 I'm exhausted. 417 00:26:39,183 --> 00:26:40,517 Know what I can't decide? 418 00:26:40,559 --> 00:26:43,687 I can't decide whether we should have a DJ or a band. 419 00:26:45,772 --> 00:26:47,065 Security! 420 00:27:02,414 --> 00:27:05,667 Thank you for inviting me to the land of milk and honey. 421 00:27:05,751 --> 00:27:07,878 It's you people, the dairy people... 422 00:27:07,920 --> 00:27:10,756 people that make eggs, milk, cheese... 423 00:27:10,839 --> 00:27:13,926 butter, bacon, that make the country great. 424 00:27:14,092 --> 00:27:17,554 Milk makes the body good, and you make the country good. 425 00:27:21,808 --> 00:27:24,895 Thank you for inviting me to Memphis, Tennessee. 426 00:27:25,687 --> 00:27:28,690 It's people like you, the church people... 427 00:27:28,815 --> 00:27:32,903 who are the backbone and the spirit of this great land of ours. 428 00:27:34,446 --> 00:27:38,492 I love the Lord, and I love the King, Elvis Presley. 429 00:27:42,329 --> 00:27:46,625 I want to thank you for inviting me to the Lone Star State. 430 00:27:48,836 --> 00:27:50,295 Home of the cowboys! 431 00:27:51,547 --> 00:27:53,173 How about them Cowboys? 432 00:27:54,132 --> 00:27:56,718 It's people like you, the ranchers... 433 00:27:56,969 --> 00:27:59,263 who are the backbone of this country. 434 00:28:00,681 --> 00:28:04,351 Now, before I go, I got one more thing to say: 435 00:28:05,602 --> 00:28:08,981 The stars at night are big and bright 436 00:28:09,565 --> 00:28:12,067 Deep in the heart of Texas 437 00:28:15,988 --> 00:28:16,989 It's not bad. 438 00:28:17,072 --> 00:28:19,366 Will I get another speech anytime soon? 439 00:28:19,449 --> 00:28:21,201 What's the matter with this speech? 440 00:28:21,285 --> 00:28:24,663 I should be talking about something a little more relevant. 441 00:28:25,080 --> 00:28:26,123 Relevant? 442 00:28:26,165 --> 00:28:29,543 People would be cheering if I read the recipe for corn bread. 443 00:28:29,626 --> 00:28:32,087 It's not working. I'm only one point up in the polls. 444 00:28:32,171 --> 00:28:35,799 Don't worry about the polls. They're just a sampling. Polls change. 445 00:28:35,883 --> 00:28:37,426 Don't get ahead of yourself. 446 00:28:37,509 --> 00:28:40,345 We're here to help. The people really like you. 447 00:28:40,429 --> 00:28:43,849 Cheer up, we'll be in Chicago in a few days. You got a brother there. 448 00:28:43,891 --> 00:28:46,310 Then the people will find out what you're all about. 449 00:28:46,351 --> 00:28:49,062 Yeah, but I don't even know what I'm all about. 450 00:28:55,986 --> 00:28:59,990 In the latest polls, Mays Gilliam is up just one point, to 10 percent. 451 00:29:00,199 --> 00:29:03,660 Vice President Brian Lewis still holds a commanding 84 percent. 452 00:29:03,744 --> 00:29:05,704 Six percent are undecided, saying... 453 00:29:05,787 --> 00:29:09,541 they don't know who they're voting for, they just know it's not Gilliam. 454 00:29:09,791 --> 00:29:12,336 When you get out there, listen to the crowd. 455 00:29:12,419 --> 00:29:16,006 Talk to them, make it look like you believe in what you're saying. 456 00:29:16,715 --> 00:29:19,384 I know we haven't exactly always seen eye to eye... 457 00:29:19,468 --> 00:29:21,637 but this is very important. 458 00:29:21,720 --> 00:29:24,389 -I can't stress that enough. -Alderman Gilliam? 459 00:29:25,057 --> 00:29:28,352 There's a Mitch Gilliam outside. He says he's your brother. 460 00:29:29,019 --> 00:29:30,187 Send him in. 461 00:29:31,605 --> 00:29:35,484 Tonight, America will get its first impressions of Mays Gilliam. 462 00:29:35,567 --> 00:29:38,237 You know what they say about first impressions. 463 00:29:40,906 --> 00:29:44,243 Look at my little brother! You said you'd call when you got here. 464 00:29:44,368 --> 00:29:47,246 I was trying to call you, but I've been doing press all day. 465 00:29:47,329 --> 00:29:49,581 My little brother, running for President. 466 00:29:49,665 --> 00:29:52,751 Let me introduce you to Martin Geller, Debra Lassiter. 467 00:29:52,918 --> 00:29:57,339 What's happening, baby? Thanks for what you're doing for my brother. Appreciate it. 468 00:29:57,422 --> 00:29:59,258 How about you, thriller? What's going-- 469 00:29:59,341 --> 00:30:01,969 Nice to meet you. What do you do for a living? 470 00:30:03,262 --> 00:30:06,431 I'm a bail bondsman. I got an office on the Southside. 471 00:30:06,515 --> 00:30:08,725 -Bail bondsman. -Yes, sir. 472 00:30:15,315 --> 00:30:16,567 How's business? 473 00:30:16,650 --> 00:30:19,069 I tell you how business is. Business is great. 474 00:30:19,111 --> 00:30:20,904 Thank God for crime. 475 00:30:23,073 --> 00:30:26,160 Thank God for crime. Could you give us a minute? 476 00:30:27,703 --> 00:30:28,787 Five. 477 00:30:31,248 --> 00:30:32,916 Nice. Real nice. 478 00:30:33,417 --> 00:30:36,753 Look at you, man! I see you all on the shows, politicking. 479 00:30:36,795 --> 00:30:39,256 You like the way your campaign is going? 480 00:30:39,298 --> 00:30:40,799 Look at this. 481 00:30:41,425 --> 00:30:45,095 Let me ask you something, brother. When they gonna let you speak? 482 00:30:45,179 --> 00:30:47,764 I've been talking all day. I was talking to the press. 483 00:30:47,848 --> 00:30:51,268 You been talking, but when they gonna let you speak your mind? 484 00:30:51,310 --> 00:30:54,188 This ain't you. You gonna say this shit? This shit is booty. 485 00:30:54,271 --> 00:30:58,066 Say this if you want to, watch that man come sweep your butt off stage. 486 00:30:58,275 --> 00:31:01,778 Look at this poster: "Mays." Who are they talking about? Willie? 487 00:31:02,154 --> 00:31:03,280 Let me tell you something. 488 00:31:03,363 --> 00:31:06,867 They're the everyday common folk, working people. Laborers. 489 00:31:07,117 --> 00:31:09,119 Construction workers, nurses. 490 00:31:09,203 --> 00:31:11,663 Play the game when you're working for them. 491 00:31:11,747 --> 00:31:14,541 This is your campaign. You're supposed to be in charge. 492 00:31:17,503 --> 00:31:18,837 It's time. 493 00:31:19,796 --> 00:31:20,964 I got to go. 494 00:31:24,676 --> 00:31:27,846 I love you, man, and I'm with you no matter what. 495 00:31:29,515 --> 00:31:32,142 -Go get them. -I'll see you out there. 496 00:31:34,478 --> 00:31:35,646 Speak. 497 00:31:39,691 --> 00:31:43,195 Chicago, please welcome your next president: 498 00:31:43,403 --> 00:31:45,823 Alderman Mays Gilliam. 499 00:32:05,592 --> 00:32:07,636 What the hell is he doing? 500 00:32:11,849 --> 00:32:14,101 They had a speech written for me... 501 00:32:15,602 --> 00:32:17,563 about what the people need. 502 00:32:17,855 --> 00:32:20,023 But you guys are the people. 503 00:32:20,440 --> 00:32:21,775 You know what you need. 504 00:32:22,818 --> 00:32:24,152 Better schools... 505 00:32:25,112 --> 00:32:26,613 better jobs... 506 00:32:27,072 --> 00:32:28,615 Less crime. 507 00:32:30,951 --> 00:32:33,704 How many of you, right now... 508 00:32:34,079 --> 00:32:38,750 work two jobs just to have enough money to be broke? 509 00:32:39,459 --> 00:32:40,919 That ain't right. 510 00:32:41,753 --> 00:32:45,048 If you work two jobs, and at the end of the week... 511 00:32:45,215 --> 00:32:48,594 you got just enough money to get your broke ass home... 512 00:32:48,760 --> 00:32:51,096 Let me hear you say, "That ain't right!" 513 00:32:51,263 --> 00:32:52,556 That ain't right! 514 00:32:54,474 --> 00:32:58,937 How many of you have children that they call stupid? 515 00:32:59,438 --> 00:33:01,899 Don't be ashamed! It ain't your fault. 516 00:33:01,940 --> 00:33:05,652 I asked my niece the other day, "What's four plus four?" She said, "44." 517 00:33:06,361 --> 00:33:09,531 But that ain't her fault! That's the school's fault. 518 00:33:10,115 --> 00:33:13,702 If your child's school has old-ass books... 519 00:33:13,785 --> 00:33:17,331 and brand-new metal detectors, let me hear you say, "That ain't right!" 520 00:33:17,414 --> 00:33:18,957 That ain't right! 521 00:33:19,124 --> 00:33:20,334 It ain't right. 522 00:33:20,417 --> 00:33:25,172 And now we got these corporations stealing all the money. 523 00:33:25,589 --> 00:33:28,258 They ain't stealing their money, they stealing our money! 524 00:33:28,342 --> 00:33:29,593 The pension. 525 00:33:29,635 --> 00:33:31,678 You work for 35 years. 526 00:33:31,845 --> 00:33:35,849 You thought you'd leave your kids a will, now you'll leave them a won't! 527 00:33:36,141 --> 00:33:39,603 You show up to get your pension, they give you a pen! 528 00:33:40,020 --> 00:33:44,441 A damn pen! What in the hell am I supposed to do with a pen? 529 00:33:44,608 --> 00:33:48,362 I should stab you in the neck with this pen, Mr. Pension Taker. 530 00:33:48,529 --> 00:33:50,447 Get your hand out of my pocket! 531 00:33:50,656 --> 00:33:54,034 Taking everybody's pension, and nobody going to jail. 532 00:33:54,117 --> 00:33:56,495 That's some bullshit. Ain't it? 533 00:33:56,620 --> 00:34:00,374 Meanwhile, we steal a Big Mac with cheese... 534 00:34:00,457 --> 00:34:02,543 next thing you know, we on Death Row! 535 00:34:02,626 --> 00:34:03,710 That ain't right! 536 00:34:07,965 --> 00:34:11,677 How many of you work in a city you can't afford to live in? 537 00:34:12,845 --> 00:34:13,971 That ain't right! 538 00:34:14,847 --> 00:34:18,642 How many of you work in a mall you can't afford to shop in? 539 00:34:18,684 --> 00:34:20,018 That ain't right! 540 00:34:20,185 --> 00:34:22,896 How many of you clean up a hotel... 541 00:34:22,980 --> 00:34:25,566 you ain't never gonna be able to stay in? 542 00:34:25,816 --> 00:34:27,150 That ain't right! 543 00:34:30,779 --> 00:34:35,701 We got nurses that work in hospitals they can't even afford to get sick in. 544 00:34:37,369 --> 00:34:38,537 It ain't right! 545 00:34:42,040 --> 00:34:43,709 It isn't right! 546 00:34:45,085 --> 00:34:48,046 That shit is wrong! 547 00:34:50,215 --> 00:34:51,675 It's dead wrong! 548 00:34:56,013 --> 00:34:57,181 I'm Mays Gilliam... 549 00:34:57,222 --> 00:35:00,851 and I'm running for President of the United States of America. 550 00:35:10,360 --> 00:35:12,863 No questions. Sorry. 551 00:35:13,322 --> 00:35:14,823 Where's Mitch? 552 00:35:16,575 --> 00:35:20,537 Go to work. Handle your business. If you need me, call me. 553 00:35:21,288 --> 00:35:22,456 I'll call you. 554 00:35:22,748 --> 00:35:26,835 Are you insane? You can't just go out in front of 5,000 people and talk! 555 00:35:27,002 --> 00:35:30,547 And you said "shit." Presidential candidates do not say "shit." 556 00:35:30,589 --> 00:35:34,218 Show me a man that's never said shit, I'll show you someone full of shit! 557 00:35:34,301 --> 00:35:35,385 Debra, hold on. 558 00:35:35,969 --> 00:35:38,847 What you just did, that was great. 559 00:35:39,014 --> 00:35:41,934 Maybe you're right. We could tailor the speeches more to you. 560 00:35:42,017 --> 00:35:43,310 My speeches? 561 00:35:43,393 --> 00:35:44,978 Come on, did you hear them? 562 00:35:45,062 --> 00:35:48,690 If this is gonna work, it's got to fit me. It's got to be my campaign. 563 00:35:48,774 --> 00:35:50,192 This is not your campaign. 564 00:35:50,275 --> 00:35:53,612 You do what I tell you to, or you'll be back in D.C. on your bicycle. 565 00:35:53,654 --> 00:35:55,864 I'm the one running for President. 566 00:35:55,948 --> 00:35:59,159 If we're gonna run this campaign, it's got to go my way. 567 00:35:59,243 --> 00:36:01,245 We're gonna do it the way I want it done. 568 00:36:01,328 --> 00:36:03,997 Hold on. I don't know if that's such a good idea. 569 00:36:04,081 --> 00:36:06,750 If you don't know, you better ask somebody. 570 00:36:21,139 --> 00:36:24,476 After a slow start, Mays Gilliam has made some dramatic changes... 571 00:36:24,518 --> 00:36:26,311 in his presidential campaign. 572 00:36:35,946 --> 00:36:40,659 Hi. I'm Mays Gilliam, candidate for President of the United States. 573 00:36:40,993 --> 00:36:42,870 This is my new headquarters. 574 00:36:42,953 --> 00:36:47,124 The individuals you see before you will help me guide my campaign. 575 00:36:47,833 --> 00:36:50,002 These are my people. 576 00:36:52,671 --> 00:36:55,757 Mays Gilliam is turning the establishment on its ear... 577 00:36:55,841 --> 00:36:58,218 with his new controversial campaign ads. 578 00:37:02,389 --> 00:37:06,727 If you love America, vote Mays Gilliam for President. 579 00:37:07,519 --> 00:37:10,230 Paid for by Citizens for Mays Gilliam. 580 00:37:24,536 --> 00:37:27,080 The part of Mays Gilliam's security director... 581 00:37:27,164 --> 00:37:30,042 will now be played by Muhammad Muhammad Muhammad. 582 00:37:31,668 --> 00:37:35,881 Childcare is one of the most important issues facing this country today. 583 00:37:36,089 --> 00:37:39,009 The working mother has to take her child to a nanny. 584 00:37:39,218 --> 00:37:42,054 The nanny has to take her child to a babysitter. 585 00:37:42,137 --> 00:37:44,890 The babysitter has to take her child to daycare. 586 00:37:44,973 --> 00:37:49,269 On the count of three, I want everybody to take care of their own damn kids! 587 00:37:49,937 --> 00:37:53,524 Whose baby is this? It ain't mine! 588 00:37:54,107 --> 00:37:58,695 Gay people want what every American wants. A good house, a good job! 589 00:37:59,029 --> 00:38:02,032 I believe in gay rights because when I see gay people... 590 00:38:02,074 --> 00:38:05,994 all I'm seeing are people, normal people like every other American. 591 00:38:12,918 --> 00:38:16,713 Thank you for inviting me to the Player's Ball! 592 00:38:20,008 --> 00:38:22,219 America needs to change its ways. 593 00:38:22,636 --> 00:38:26,598 I promise if I'm your President, I will take care of everybody: 594 00:38:26,890 --> 00:38:31,270 Big business and small business, show business and ho business. 595 00:38:44,074 --> 00:38:45,075 Hello, Debra. 596 00:38:45,117 --> 00:38:46,118 Bill? 597 00:38:46,451 --> 00:38:49,663 I am in Detroit at a Player's Ball with pimps and whores. 598 00:38:49,788 --> 00:38:51,665 Excuse me, hoes! 599 00:38:52,708 --> 00:38:55,919 I can't do this. You got to get me out of here. I can't control him. 600 00:38:55,961 --> 00:38:57,462 He won't listen to me! 601 00:38:57,546 --> 00:39:01,091 No, Debra. I need you out there, and this is going great. 602 00:39:02,926 --> 00:39:04,595 This is what we wanted. 603 00:39:04,761 --> 00:39:06,930 I love this guy. "That ain't right." 604 00:39:07,055 --> 00:39:08,932 He really thinks he can make a difference. 605 00:39:08,974 --> 00:39:12,102 Stop worrying. This will work out fine. Bye. 606 00:39:14,521 --> 00:39:15,856 Don't I know you? 607 00:39:16,023 --> 00:39:17,107 No! 608 00:39:27,367 --> 00:39:31,246 He feels good Things are going his way 609 00:39:32,122 --> 00:39:35,792 He just might be The President someday 610 00:40:09,243 --> 00:40:12,955 Mays, darling, I've been thinking. I want a small wedding. 611 00:40:13,038 --> 00:40:15,666 I think I want 150, maybe 200 people. 612 00:40:15,833 --> 00:40:18,210 I've always said I wanted a wedding in a church... 613 00:40:18,252 --> 00:40:21,088 but lately I've been thinking about the Botanical Gardens. 614 00:40:21,171 --> 00:40:23,674 We could do it by the tulips. It'll be beautiful-- 615 00:40:23,841 --> 00:40:25,175 Security! 616 00:40:39,857 --> 00:40:41,692 Who the hell is Mays Gilliam? 617 00:40:42,234 --> 00:40:43,819 He's running against you, sir. 618 00:40:43,986 --> 00:40:46,530 What happened to Gaines? 619 00:40:46,613 --> 00:40:48,073 He died in a plane crash. 620 00:40:48,866 --> 00:40:50,742 Get out of here! Gaines is dead? 621 00:40:50,909 --> 00:40:53,871 -Don't you remember? It was on the news! -Not my news. 622 00:40:55,205 --> 00:40:58,584 This fellow, Gilliam, is an alderman from D.C. 623 00:40:59,168 --> 00:41:00,878 He took Gaines' place, sir. 624 00:41:00,961 --> 00:41:02,546 I'm running against this guy. 625 00:41:02,588 --> 00:41:03,547 Yes, sir. 626 00:41:04,715 --> 00:41:06,383 That is some bullshit. 627 00:41:06,717 --> 00:41:08,218 This is my time. 628 00:41:08,260 --> 00:41:10,596 I've been Vice President for eight years. 629 00:41:10,762 --> 00:41:14,433 I am a war hero, and I am Sharon Stone's cousin! 630 00:41:14,975 --> 00:41:19,271 And I'll be damned if I'm going to let my election be ruined by this asshole! 631 00:41:20,355 --> 00:41:24,026 I want this guy done. You hear me? Finish him! 632 00:41:25,277 --> 00:41:27,613 He will be destroyed, sir, as you wish. 633 00:41:28,363 --> 00:41:31,825 This is the White House without Mays Gilliam. Peaceful, isn't it? 634 00:41:31,950 --> 00:41:35,120 Now, this is the White House if Gilliam is elected. 635 00:41:43,253 --> 00:41:45,714 Let's keep Mays Gilliam out of the White House. 636 00:41:45,797 --> 00:41:48,717 Vote Brian Lewis for President. It's your last chance. 637 00:41:50,344 --> 00:41:52,471 How do you want to handle this? 638 00:41:53,347 --> 00:41:55,307 I don't want to go negative. 639 00:41:56,517 --> 00:41:57,976 Nobody wants to hear that. 640 00:41:58,018 --> 00:42:00,938 I want people to vote for me, not against Lewis. 641 00:42:01,021 --> 00:42:04,274 -People don't know what they want to hear. -We have to respond. 642 00:42:04,316 --> 00:42:07,986 We should go with something measured, accurate. Let's call him on his record! 643 00:42:08,070 --> 00:42:11,031 You can't challenge his record when Mays doesn't have one. 644 00:42:11,114 --> 00:42:12,491 How about a massage? 645 00:42:14,326 --> 00:42:15,744 Ladies and gentlemen... 646 00:42:15,828 --> 00:42:19,790 please welcome presidential candidate Mays Gilliam. 647 00:42:31,176 --> 00:42:32,553 Thank you! 648 00:42:32,886 --> 00:42:36,181 This is Conservative Talk 520. You're listening to Big Dave. 649 00:42:36,265 --> 00:42:39,977 Negative ads. Lewis is up, Gilliam is down. I think it's great! 650 00:42:40,018 --> 00:42:41,019 Bottom line: 651 00:42:41,103 --> 00:42:44,523 I don't think I want Gilliam and his homies to be in the White House. 652 00:42:46,525 --> 00:42:50,487 People are saying these ads are dirty politics. Give me a small break! 653 00:42:50,529 --> 00:42:55,117 We're not talking about running a rib shack but a country! 654 00:42:55,242 --> 00:42:58,078 He's running for President and every vote counts! 655 00:42:58,287 --> 00:43:01,081 Ladies and gentlemen, Mays Gilliam! 656 00:43:02,624 --> 00:43:06,253 And if these ads are so bad, why hasn't Gilliam said anything? 657 00:43:06,712 --> 00:43:08,130 Howard Stern rocks! 658 00:43:08,297 --> 00:43:09,923 You're on with Big Dave. 659 00:43:10,007 --> 00:43:13,677 The reason Gilliam hasn't responded is because he has too much integrity. 660 00:43:23,020 --> 00:43:26,607 We just got endorsements from Raekwon the Chef... 661 00:43:26,815 --> 00:43:28,525 and Ghostface Killah. 662 00:43:28,984 --> 00:43:30,903 -Is this good? -It's great. 663 00:43:32,905 --> 00:43:34,948 Where are we on this running mate thing? 664 00:43:35,324 --> 00:43:38,327 I've been making calls. Nobody wants to run with you. 665 00:43:38,535 --> 00:43:39,912 Who did you call? 666 00:43:40,537 --> 00:43:42,039 Everybody. 667 00:43:42,456 --> 00:43:44,124 Did you call Hammer? 668 00:43:44,958 --> 00:43:47,461 No, I did not call Hammer. 669 00:43:49,129 --> 00:43:51,089 Then you didn't call everybody. 670 00:43:51,465 --> 00:43:53,675 Mr. Gilliam, can I have your autograph? 671 00:43:53,759 --> 00:43:55,052 I'll be right back. 672 00:43:57,763 --> 00:43:59,932 -Should we call Hammer? -No. 673 00:44:01,642 --> 00:44:03,227 Say cheese! 674 00:44:03,477 --> 00:44:07,564 Mays Gilliam did not attend this year's annual rally against cancer. 675 00:44:08,774 --> 00:44:11,902 Is Mays Gilliam for cancer or against cancer? 676 00:44:12,820 --> 00:44:15,572 Mays Gilliam, he's for cancer. 677 00:44:16,114 --> 00:44:19,952 Vote Brian Lewis for President. It's your last chance. 678 00:44:21,787 --> 00:44:23,455 Cancer lover! 679 00:44:24,790 --> 00:44:27,709 No, he does not get away with this crap! 680 00:44:27,793 --> 00:44:30,295 This is what we'll do. You ever watch Bugs Bunny? 681 00:44:30,379 --> 00:44:35,217 Bugs would always shoot Elmer Fudd in the face and drop an anvil on his head. 682 00:44:35,384 --> 00:44:38,720 But what made Elmer really mad is when Bugs Bunny kissed him. 683 00:44:38,804 --> 00:44:40,597 We got to kiss this bitch. 684 00:44:40,973 --> 00:44:43,433 -How do you propose we do that? -Watch this. 685 00:44:43,600 --> 00:44:47,813 I'm a Klansman. I hate niggers, Jews, and fags, but I love Brian Lewis. 686 00:44:48,939 --> 00:44:51,358 Yo, what's up? I'm Osama Bin Laden. 687 00:44:51,608 --> 00:44:54,319 I hate America, but I love Brian Lewis. 688 00:44:54,611 --> 00:44:56,697 Paid for by Osama Bin Laden. 689 00:44:57,406 --> 00:44:59,616 Sharon Stone is a defector. 690 00:44:59,700 --> 00:45:03,162 That's what Lewis campaign insiders are saying about the Hollywood star... 691 00:45:03,245 --> 00:45:07,958 and cousin of Vice President Lewis, after Stone's endorsement of Mays Gilliam. 692 00:45:08,000 --> 00:45:09,293 I don't believe it! 693 00:45:11,170 --> 00:45:12,129 Yeah! 694 00:45:14,006 --> 00:45:15,382 I know! 695 00:45:16,049 --> 00:45:17,718 Did you hear.... 696 00:45:19,678 --> 00:45:20,971 What are you doing here? 697 00:45:21,013 --> 00:45:23,807 Gilliam is over 30 points. 698 00:45:24,892 --> 00:45:28,353 That means even if he loses he's the frontrunner in 2008. 699 00:45:28,395 --> 00:45:31,482 In case you've forgotten, I intend to run for President in 2008... 700 00:45:31,523 --> 00:45:33,358 and I am not running against him. 701 00:45:33,734 --> 00:45:36,820 So this is over. Either you put a stop to it or I will. 702 00:45:36,904 --> 00:45:40,616 I came on board to run a campaign for a man we didn't expect to win... 703 00:45:40,741 --> 00:45:42,826 not to sabotage him so he'd lose. 704 00:45:42,868 --> 00:45:46,413 You're in this as thick as I am. Of course he's supposed to lose! 705 00:45:46,497 --> 00:45:47,915 That's why we picked him. 706 00:45:47,998 --> 00:45:50,417 Are you with me or are you with him? 707 00:45:50,501 --> 00:45:52,669 I thought you wanted what was best for the party. 708 00:45:52,711 --> 00:45:54,338 I'm what's best for the party! 709 00:45:55,380 --> 00:45:56,715 What's the matter? 710 00:45:56,798 --> 00:46:00,010 Democracy doesn't work for you when you're not winning? 711 00:46:01,678 --> 00:46:03,055 I'm with him. 712 00:46:10,521 --> 00:46:11,855 I'm with him? 713 00:46:20,948 --> 00:46:23,826 -Who are these people again? -The Urban Business Board. 714 00:46:23,909 --> 00:46:26,954 -What are your plans for Social Security? -Give it to old people. 715 00:46:27,037 --> 00:46:29,456 -Your plans on global warming? -Global ice tea. 716 00:46:29,540 --> 00:46:31,208 -You the man! -You the woman! 717 00:46:33,752 --> 00:46:36,630 I want to introduce you to Chester Norris Allen. 718 00:46:36,922 --> 00:46:41,176 He owns a bottling plant in D.C. and I spoke to him about our problem. 719 00:46:41,260 --> 00:46:42,719 We've got a nice check for you. 720 00:46:42,803 --> 00:46:45,514 We can't take it. You sell malt liquor to kids. 721 00:46:45,597 --> 00:46:46,890 I do no such thing. 722 00:46:46,974 --> 00:46:51,186 Come on, man. It's orange beer with a nipple top. Now, who's that for? 723 00:46:51,436 --> 00:46:53,063 It's Crib Malt Liquor, man! 724 00:46:53,272 --> 00:46:54,731 He's unbelievable! 725 00:46:55,399 --> 00:46:58,777 Damn it, we need that money! Why do you make everything so difficult? 726 00:46:58,861 --> 00:47:00,863 It's Crib Malt Liquor! 727 00:47:01,363 --> 00:47:04,283 "Crib Malt Liquor, just like Mama used to make"? 728 00:47:04,366 --> 00:47:05,909 Whose mama? Not my mama! 729 00:47:06,785 --> 00:47:10,622 The situation is getting tense with the threat of the bus line being shut down. 730 00:47:10,706 --> 00:47:13,625 Protestors took their concerns to transit officials... 731 00:47:13,709 --> 00:47:17,713 but talks broke down when the newly appointed alderman, Reginald Shannon... 732 00:47:17,796 --> 00:47:20,507 was punched in the face by an angry protestor. 733 00:47:23,135 --> 00:47:25,470 -Good evening, sir. -What's up, Nikki? 734 00:47:25,512 --> 00:47:29,266 I noticed you weren't at the party, so I thought... 735 00:47:29,933 --> 00:47:34,354 if there is anything you would like for me to do, I would be happy to. 736 00:47:35,606 --> 00:47:37,107 Could I ask you something? 737 00:47:38,484 --> 00:47:39,651 Yes. 738 00:47:40,986 --> 00:47:43,322 You seem like a nice girl. 739 00:47:44,990 --> 00:47:47,159 How did you get into this line of work? 740 00:47:52,998 --> 00:47:55,542 I went to the University of Nebraska... 741 00:47:55,709 --> 00:47:58,670 where I majored in Theater and Communications. 742 00:47:58,879 --> 00:48:02,299 I did some extra work, and a few things that went straight to video. 743 00:48:06,595 --> 00:48:07,596 Okay. 744 00:48:08,096 --> 00:48:09,765 Can I ask you a question? 745 00:48:09,848 --> 00:48:11,058 Yeah, sure. 746 00:48:11,225 --> 00:48:15,646 Since I've been here, you haven't really given me any assignments. 747 00:48:16,688 --> 00:48:19,149 I was wondering if you find me attractive. 748 00:48:23,362 --> 00:48:25,155 I think you're.... 749 00:48:25,239 --> 00:48:28,116 I think you're very attractive. It's just that... 750 00:48:29,201 --> 00:48:33,831 I like to get to know people before I get involved. 751 00:48:35,541 --> 00:48:38,168 I don't mean to be out of line, sir... 752 00:48:39,962 --> 00:48:40,963 but are you? 753 00:48:44,299 --> 00:48:45,676 Am I what? 754 00:48:45,717 --> 00:48:47,886 Trying to get to know somebody. 755 00:48:53,267 --> 00:48:56,687 -It is late, I'm out of here. -You need to take a cab. 756 00:48:57,271 --> 00:48:59,356 I'll be fine. I'm just gonna walk. 757 00:49:05,737 --> 00:49:07,406 Take a cab! 758 00:49:08,407 --> 00:49:10,576 I'll be fine. I'll walk. 759 00:49:18,542 --> 00:49:19,668 Need a ride? 760 00:49:26,091 --> 00:49:27,634 Where are we going? 761 00:49:27,759 --> 00:49:30,095 I just thought I'd give you a little tour. 762 00:49:42,649 --> 00:49:46,111 If you look over there, it's the Lincoln Memorial. 763 00:49:47,404 --> 00:49:49,031 Lincoln freed the slaves... 764 00:49:49,114 --> 00:49:52,951 but before he did it, he said, "First you niggers got to build me a statue." 765 00:49:54,495 --> 00:49:57,456 Right there is the Jefferson Memorial. 766 00:49:57,498 --> 00:49:59,458 Jefferson had a black mistress. 767 00:49:59,541 --> 00:50:03,754 He said, "All men are created equal, but black women got the nicest ass!" 768 00:50:06,089 --> 00:50:07,799 That's the Treasury. 769 00:50:07,966 --> 00:50:11,720 If you look real hard in the window, you can see Oprah counting her money. 770 00:50:13,680 --> 00:50:16,767 $20 trillion one, $20 trillion two.... 771 00:50:16,934 --> 00:50:17,976 Hi, Oprah! 772 00:50:24,191 --> 00:50:25,484 What's it like... 773 00:50:25,567 --> 00:50:29,613 traveling all over the country and meeting all those people? 774 00:50:30,697 --> 00:50:33,951 I like it. I like traveling, I like meeting the people. 775 00:50:33,992 --> 00:50:38,372 But sometimes, you don't know if people like you for you. 776 00:50:38,497 --> 00:50:40,958 -Know what I mean? -I like you for you. 777 00:50:43,126 --> 00:50:45,003 And I think you're okay. 778 00:50:45,337 --> 00:50:47,297 -Just okay? -I'm just playing. 779 00:50:50,342 --> 00:50:52,427 I forgot how nice D.C. was. 780 00:50:53,929 --> 00:50:56,807 I'm always working. I never get a chance to check it out. 781 00:50:56,849 --> 00:51:00,143 Maybe you need to take advantage of what's in front of you. 782 00:51:00,185 --> 00:51:04,523 You never know, you may look up someday, and it might not be there. 783 00:51:09,236 --> 00:51:10,320 Freeze! 784 00:51:10,696 --> 00:51:14,283 Put your hands up in the air and step away from Mr. Gilliam! 785 00:51:14,366 --> 00:51:15,534 It's okay! 786 00:51:15,742 --> 00:51:18,495 -What the hell are you doing? -What the hell are you doing? 787 00:51:18,579 --> 00:51:22,541 You can't go dashing off in the middle of the night with some girl. 788 00:51:22,624 --> 00:51:25,294 Something's happened. We got to pack and get out of here! 789 00:51:25,377 --> 00:51:27,880 Somebody make sure she gets home safely. 790 00:51:28,338 --> 00:51:30,424 We have a plane waiting for us. 791 00:51:36,388 --> 00:51:40,392 In Florida today, guns and explosives were found at a junior high school. 792 00:51:40,475 --> 00:51:44,396 No one was injured in the incident, but with just six weeks till Election Day... 793 00:51:44,646 --> 00:51:47,149 this could be a hot-button issue for both parties. 794 00:51:47,232 --> 00:51:50,319 Now, back to the Jay-Z song already in progress. 795 00:51:51,862 --> 00:51:55,157 Muhammad, get me a gun in case another kid tries to get crazy. 796 00:51:55,240 --> 00:51:58,869 This could work in our favor. Florida is a big Second Amendment state. 797 00:51:58,952 --> 00:52:01,705 This is serious. This is not the Player's Ball. 798 00:52:01,788 --> 00:52:05,626 You can cut into Lewis' numbers. Talk about the kids, not about the guns. 799 00:52:05,918 --> 00:52:08,170 If I get shot, everybody is fired. 800 00:52:08,712 --> 00:52:09,880 One question here. 801 00:52:09,963 --> 00:52:13,717 There's been an outcry that something needs to be done about school violence. 802 00:52:13,759 --> 00:52:15,677 What do you plan to do about this? 803 00:52:15,761 --> 00:52:17,846 I feel we need to talk to our kids.... 804 00:52:30,025 --> 00:52:31,026 Excuse me. 805 00:52:34,029 --> 00:52:35,405 Hello, children. 806 00:52:35,948 --> 00:52:37,199 Good morning. 807 00:52:39,076 --> 00:52:42,704 Pay attention. This is going to be a class: Bullshit 101. 808 00:52:42,788 --> 00:52:46,708 Ladies and gentlemen, our American children are hurting today... 809 00:52:47,125 --> 00:52:49,419 and we need to reach out to them... 810 00:52:49,461 --> 00:52:52,256 and give them all a good old-fashioned American hug. 811 00:52:54,299 --> 00:52:57,845 America is the greatest country on the face of the earth... 812 00:52:58,387 --> 00:52:59,805 and I want to say: 813 00:53:00,305 --> 00:53:01,807 God bless America! 814 00:53:02,474 --> 00:53:04,059 And no place else. 815 00:53:04,226 --> 00:53:06,353 Thank you. Thank you, children. 816 00:53:06,436 --> 00:53:09,148 No more bombs now. And don't use guns. 817 00:53:09,982 --> 00:53:11,984 -That went well. -Very touching. 818 00:53:12,067 --> 00:53:13,944 -The kids liked me. -You were very genuine. 819 00:53:13,986 --> 00:53:15,612 They responded. 820 00:53:15,654 --> 00:53:18,824 I tried to hug a girl and a boy so I wouldn't seem sexist. 821 00:53:19,616 --> 00:53:21,285 Mr. Vice President! 822 00:53:21,952 --> 00:53:23,871 Welcome to the show, Alderman Gilliam. 823 00:53:23,954 --> 00:53:26,290 Surprised you're not somewhere with your girlfriend. 824 00:53:26,331 --> 00:53:27,499 How do you know about her? 825 00:53:27,583 --> 00:53:30,127 I'm the government. I know everything. 826 00:53:30,294 --> 00:53:31,753 We really should debate. 827 00:53:33,630 --> 00:53:35,507 Let's get something straight. 828 00:53:35,632 --> 00:53:38,343 I don't know you, and I don't like you. 829 00:53:39,219 --> 00:53:42,556 Party's over. I'm fixing to whip your ass. 830 00:53:43,348 --> 00:53:44,725 You got it? 831 00:53:48,937 --> 00:53:50,564 Sir, we really should debate. 832 00:53:52,232 --> 00:53:55,694 God bless America, and no place else. 833 00:54:00,157 --> 00:54:02,826 Sir, we just got this off the uplink. 834 00:54:03,035 --> 00:54:03,994 What is it? 835 00:54:04,036 --> 00:54:06,872 An off-the-record comment by Mays Gilliam. 836 00:54:07,039 --> 00:54:08,790 -Bad? -Yes, sir. 837 00:54:09,374 --> 00:54:10,459 Good work. 838 00:54:17,090 --> 00:54:19,218 It's on! Guys, come here! 839 00:54:19,301 --> 00:54:22,679 ...Lewis was on the scene comforting parents and students. 840 00:54:23,514 --> 00:54:25,933 The press is in Lewis' back pocket. 841 00:54:26,683 --> 00:54:30,437 In this CNB News exclusive, our cameras caught Gilliam... 842 00:54:30,687 --> 00:54:34,691 making what was arguably the most controversial statement of the day. 843 00:54:34,942 --> 00:54:37,986 They act like us. We're bombing countries all the time. 844 00:54:38,070 --> 00:54:40,197 If I was 12, I'd have a gun, too. 845 00:54:40,239 --> 00:54:41,490 Tell me you didn't say that. 846 00:54:41,573 --> 00:54:45,410 I didn't know the camera was on me. I was playing around with some sound guy. 847 00:54:45,494 --> 00:54:47,830 You didn't know the camera was on you? 848 00:54:49,122 --> 00:54:53,210 Of course it's on you. It's always on you! You're running for President! 849 00:54:53,293 --> 00:54:54,461 I told you.... 850 00:54:54,545 --> 00:54:56,755 This is all your fault! 851 00:54:58,382 --> 00:55:01,593 Gilliam is under investigation by the FBI... 852 00:55:01,677 --> 00:55:03,595 for his involvement with this man... 853 00:55:03,762 --> 00:55:07,391 friend and associate and accused drug lord, Warren Pryor. 854 00:55:07,432 --> 00:55:10,143 -Lord, we're going to jail. -We're not going to jail. 855 00:55:10,269 --> 00:55:11,311 Is it true? 856 00:55:12,855 --> 00:55:14,022 What's up, Warren? 857 00:55:14,106 --> 00:55:17,192 I know him, but I don't drug-lord know him. 858 00:55:17,276 --> 00:55:21,363 It's just a guy I say "What's up?" to. But I don't know him know him. 859 00:55:21,488 --> 00:55:24,741 Do you have drugs on you? Get them off, I'm not going to jail for you. 860 00:55:24,825 --> 00:55:26,118 Are you on the pipe? 861 00:55:26,702 --> 00:55:28,745 This is messed up This really sucks 862 00:55:28,829 --> 00:55:31,206 Every time you're doing good trouble just pops up 863 00:55:31,290 --> 00:55:33,542 He doesn't know what he's gonna do 864 00:55:36,128 --> 00:55:38,589 This is messed up This really sucks 865 00:55:38,630 --> 00:55:40,674 Keep your head up, it's your best bet 866 00:55:40,757 --> 00:55:42,885 Let's hope the election's not through 867 00:55:42,968 --> 00:55:47,264 If you see Mays Gilliam, please do not call the authorities. 868 00:55:47,556 --> 00:55:51,268 Just do whatever you can to make his life a living hell. 869 00:55:52,019 --> 00:55:53,103 No more questions! 870 00:55:53,187 --> 00:55:56,648 If I see Mays Gilliam, I'll bust a cap in his ass. 871 00:55:56,690 --> 00:56:01,278 Gilliam is done and Big Dave says, "Waa-waa!" 872 00:56:02,154 --> 00:56:03,363 Oh, God. 873 00:56:04,281 --> 00:56:05,949 What am I going to do? 874 00:56:06,825 --> 00:56:10,454 What are you worried about? Your face isn't on the side of a bus. 875 00:56:10,496 --> 00:56:12,706 I'll be the one taking a hit for this. 876 00:56:12,789 --> 00:56:17,336 Get me on the news so I can apologize. That's what the people want to hear. 877 00:56:17,586 --> 00:56:18,921 You're probably right. 878 00:56:19,004 --> 00:56:21,590 Make a statement of some kind, try and sound sincere-- 879 00:56:21,673 --> 00:56:23,342 Just give me a break! 880 00:56:24,218 --> 00:56:27,471 You think you can say you're sorry and all of this will go away? 881 00:56:28,514 --> 00:56:32,809 Mays, you're running for President of the United States of America. 882 00:56:34,520 --> 00:56:38,148 Do you have any idea why they chose you? 883 00:56:41,527 --> 00:56:43,904 -We picked you because-- -Shut up! 884 00:56:48,826 --> 00:56:51,203 You're here to lose. 885 00:56:52,621 --> 00:56:55,165 Arnot picked you so you could lose. 886 00:56:55,916 --> 00:56:57,835 Think about it. 887 00:56:58,043 --> 00:57:01,255 If they had any idea they could win this thing... 888 00:57:01,338 --> 00:57:05,050 do you think they would have chosen an ignorant-ass nigger like you? 889 00:57:10,264 --> 00:57:11,557 Wait up. 890 00:57:12,015 --> 00:57:15,060 You're not calling me an ignorant nigger... 891 00:57:15,185 --> 00:57:17,729 and thinking you're staying on my bus. 892 00:57:19,022 --> 00:57:22,359 I am not getting off this bus. We're in the middle of nowhere-- 893 00:57:22,401 --> 00:57:25,028 Now you need a ride from an ignorant nigger. 894 00:57:25,112 --> 00:57:26,947 I am not getting off this bus! 895 00:57:27,281 --> 00:57:28,323 Apologize. 896 00:57:28,866 --> 00:57:30,242 Security! 897 00:57:31,618 --> 00:57:33,203 Damn you, Mays Gilliam! 898 00:57:34,997 --> 00:57:37,166 You knew about this all along? 899 00:58:00,439 --> 00:58:03,066 Is there trouble inside the Gilliam campaign? 900 00:58:03,108 --> 00:58:06,820 That's what Washington insiders want to know after Gilliam's chief advisor... 901 00:58:06,904 --> 00:58:09,781 Debra Lassiter, left the campaign trail. 902 00:58:09,865 --> 00:58:12,284 Down in the polls, Gilliam still has no running mate. 903 00:58:12,367 --> 00:58:14,953 Sources say the Teamsters may endorse Lewis. 904 00:58:15,037 --> 00:58:17,664 Did Gilliam kill JonBenet Ramsay? Police want to know. 905 00:58:17,748 --> 00:58:20,584 The big question: Where is Mays Gilliam? 906 00:58:21,752 --> 00:58:24,755 I'll tell you where he's at. He's with his peeps! 907 00:58:30,177 --> 00:58:31,929 -Hello? -You up? 908 00:58:32,429 --> 00:58:35,265 I was hoping you'd call. Are you okay? 909 00:58:35,349 --> 00:58:37,893 I don't know. I guess I'm all right. 910 00:58:38,477 --> 00:58:40,687 Come on, talk to Mama. 911 00:58:41,146 --> 00:58:43,774 I don't know. It seems like they're trying to get me. 912 00:58:43,816 --> 00:58:46,819 Everywhere I turn, they're trying to put a foot in my ass. 913 00:58:46,902 --> 00:58:50,280 After what you said, you need a foot put up in your ass. 914 00:58:50,364 --> 00:58:53,534 What did you expect? They would just make you President? 915 00:58:54,159 --> 00:58:56,495 They take a poll for everything I do. 916 00:58:57,037 --> 00:59:01,792 You ever been to a horserace? My dad used to take me when I was little. 917 00:59:02,626 --> 00:59:05,003 The horses wear blinders. 918 00:59:05,712 --> 00:59:09,299 They don't even see each other. They just run their race. 919 00:59:09,842 --> 00:59:13,262 So don't worry about Lewis, don't worry about the press... 920 00:59:13,345 --> 00:59:15,389 just run your race. 921 00:59:15,639 --> 00:59:17,224 Let me ask you something. 922 00:59:17,349 --> 00:59:18,350 Okay. 923 00:59:18,976 --> 00:59:20,435 What are you wearing? 924 00:59:20,894 --> 00:59:22,855 Now, you know you need to stop. 925 00:59:30,696 --> 00:59:32,948 Man, news travels fast. 926 00:59:33,323 --> 00:59:37,202 Not 10 minutes after you fired me, I had two offers for jobs. 927 00:59:37,286 --> 00:59:38,370 Good offers. 928 00:59:38,453 --> 00:59:39,872 What are you doing here? 929 00:59:40,164 --> 00:59:43,625 I know you got no reason to trust me, but I'm asking you to. 930 00:59:43,959 --> 00:59:46,003 You've got five weeks left. 931 00:59:46,086 --> 00:59:49,047 I know Lassiter is out, but I think... 932 00:59:49,882 --> 00:59:52,342 I can help you do this. 933 00:59:52,384 --> 00:59:54,052 I want to help you. 934 00:59:56,263 --> 00:59:58,265 And I'm sorry, Mays. 935 00:59:58,849 --> 01:00:00,893 I don't know what else to say... 936 01:00:01,143 --> 01:00:04,354 but as bad as things look, I don't think you should quit. 937 01:00:05,272 --> 01:00:07,065 Who said I was quitting? 938 01:00:07,566 --> 01:00:09,151 I wish I could quit. 939 01:00:09,318 --> 01:00:10,986 I wish it was that easy. 940 01:00:12,154 --> 01:00:13,697 You're lucky. 941 01:00:14,198 --> 01:00:17,367 You are so lucky. You don't know how good you got it. 942 01:00:17,618 --> 01:00:19,536 You just represent yourself. 943 01:00:19,578 --> 01:00:20,704 Me? 944 01:00:21,705 --> 01:00:23,749 I represent my whole race. 945 01:00:24,500 --> 01:00:25,918 If I quit... 946 01:00:26,001 --> 01:00:29,213 there won't be another black candidate for 50 years. 947 01:00:31,340 --> 01:00:32,466 All right. 948 01:00:34,218 --> 01:00:38,055 We can get rid of the school thing with a statement that will blow things over. 949 01:00:38,222 --> 01:00:39,598 But we need a running mate. 950 01:00:39,681 --> 01:00:42,392 Who am I supposed to pick? Nobody wants to run with me. 951 01:00:42,476 --> 01:00:44,561 We need somebody we can trust. 952 01:00:47,105 --> 01:00:48,482 Who do you trust? 953 01:00:50,567 --> 01:00:52,653 In the midst of his own Cinderella story... 954 01:00:52,736 --> 01:00:55,656 presidential candidate Gilliam is shaking it up. 955 01:00:55,739 --> 01:00:58,408 He's chosen his brother, Mitch Gilliam... 956 01:00:58,492 --> 01:01:01,620 a bail bondsman from Chicago, as his running mate. 957 01:01:02,079 --> 01:01:05,332 Political analysts say this may be too little, too late. 958 01:01:05,415 --> 01:01:07,543 Hi, I'm with the Pork Commission-- 959 01:01:07,709 --> 01:01:10,254 I'm from the Athlete's Foot-- 960 01:01:11,505 --> 01:01:12,631 Brother! 961 01:01:12,798 --> 01:01:15,384 Can you get my demo tape to somebody-- 962 01:01:24,810 --> 01:01:26,061 Are these your bags? 963 01:01:26,145 --> 01:01:28,772 Look at my shoes and at the bags. Shut up and follow me. 964 01:01:30,774 --> 01:01:32,234 Back up. 965 01:01:39,074 --> 01:01:42,452 What do you have to say about your brother's controversial comments? 966 01:01:42,619 --> 01:01:46,290 My gosh, lady, my brother said he was sorry. Let it go. 967 01:01:46,456 --> 01:01:48,625 See, that's why nobody like your ass. 968 01:01:50,627 --> 01:01:53,422 We got work to do. We way behind in the polls. 969 01:01:53,505 --> 01:01:55,424 -Am I getting paid for this? -Yeah. 970 01:01:56,592 --> 01:02:00,053 You're running for the vice presidency. You're a bail bondsman. 971 01:02:00,137 --> 01:02:04,391 You have no Washington experience, no political experience or connections. 972 01:02:04,475 --> 01:02:08,395 How does being a bail bondsman qualify you to be Vice President? 973 01:02:09,188 --> 01:02:10,689 I am a bail bondsman. 974 01:02:10,856 --> 01:02:13,525 People come to me when they in trouble, like the USA. 975 01:02:13,609 --> 01:02:16,195 We bail people out. We bail out Mexico... 976 01:02:16,278 --> 01:02:19,156 the savings and loan, the airline industry. 977 01:02:19,323 --> 01:02:22,659 Now you ask me, sir, what qualify me to run for Vice President. 978 01:02:22,701 --> 01:02:25,204 When the country is in trouble, I'll bail them out. 979 01:02:25,287 --> 01:02:27,873 Hold that thought. We have a caller from Detroit. 980 01:02:27,956 --> 01:02:32,377 Mitch! Why you looking around? It's Reggie.... Where my money at? 981 01:02:32,419 --> 01:02:35,214 Don't call me with that bullshit! You see I'm on TV. 982 01:02:35,297 --> 01:02:36,882 What about NATO? 983 01:02:36,965 --> 01:02:40,511 I never met Nato. I don't talk about people behind their back. 984 01:02:40,594 --> 01:02:43,138 NATO is the North Atlantic Treaty Organization. 985 01:02:43,555 --> 01:02:46,558 I thought you were talking about this guy named Nato. 986 01:02:46,600 --> 01:02:48,602 But you have to know these things. 987 01:02:48,727 --> 01:02:50,813 Do you know Nato Jacobs? 988 01:02:50,979 --> 01:02:54,024 Do you know Nato Jacobs? 989 01:02:54,233 --> 01:02:55,984 I'm sorry, I haven't met the gentleman. 990 01:02:56,068 --> 01:02:57,528 That's what I said. 991 01:02:57,569 --> 01:03:00,781 You know nothing about Nato? I know nothing about NATO. 992 01:03:01,031 --> 01:03:04,368 Why are you out here since inmates don't have the right to vote? 993 01:03:04,451 --> 01:03:07,329 It's not about the vote. We're looking out for the convicts. 994 01:03:07,412 --> 01:03:10,415 We want to make sure when they get out that they stay out. 995 01:03:10,499 --> 01:03:14,211 The better the education, they become more productive citizens. 996 01:03:14,378 --> 01:03:15,879 Mitch! What's up? 997 01:03:15,963 --> 01:03:17,089 Shorty G! 998 01:03:17,172 --> 01:03:18,882 It's good to see you, boy! 999 01:03:18,966 --> 01:03:22,803 This is Shorty G. I arrested his ass. I thought you got the chair, boy. 1000 01:03:22,928 --> 01:03:26,306 Mr. Gilliam, how would you deal with white-collar crime? 1001 01:03:26,598 --> 01:03:29,143 There's no such thing as white-collar crime. 1002 01:03:29,309 --> 01:03:31,562 And there's no such thing as black-on-black crime. 1003 01:03:31,645 --> 01:03:32,855 Crime is crime. 1004 01:03:32,938 --> 01:03:36,567 I don't care if you have a white collar or a tank top. 1005 01:03:36,775 --> 01:03:39,444 If you rob me, I'll whoop your ass. 1006 01:03:41,029 --> 01:03:45,159 I'm Janet Silvers reporting live in D.C., where transit operators.... 1007 01:03:45,242 --> 01:03:48,245 -I wish we'd get into the White House. -To have a cookout? 1008 01:03:48,287 --> 01:03:50,414 They were just talking about your ward. 1009 01:03:50,497 --> 01:03:51,790 What's going on down there? 1010 01:03:51,874 --> 01:03:55,794 They want to cut bus service until they finish construction. I should go. 1011 01:03:55,836 --> 01:03:58,797 -So you can blow up the bus line? -One thing at a time. 1012 01:03:58,881 --> 01:04:02,718 The Teamsters haven't endorsed Lewis yet. Our numbers are going up. 1013 01:04:02,801 --> 01:04:06,096 If we want a real shot at this thing, we got to get Lewis to debate. 1014 01:04:06,180 --> 01:04:08,098 He knows that. That's why he won't. 1015 01:04:08,140 --> 01:04:10,267 He's avoiding me like he owes me child support. 1016 01:04:10,350 --> 01:04:13,479 He is scared. He's holding the ball, hoping the clock will run out. 1017 01:04:13,562 --> 01:04:16,482 That's a punk move. Ducking and hiding like a little bitch! 1018 01:04:16,607 --> 01:04:20,068 That may be, but he won't debate you because you call him a little bitch. 1019 01:04:22,905 --> 01:04:25,240 What this community needs-- 1020 01:04:25,324 --> 01:04:28,285 Is for you to debate me right now! 1021 01:04:28,327 --> 01:04:29,786 Tell the people that! 1022 01:04:29,828 --> 01:04:32,289 I thought I told you that we won't stop. 1023 01:04:32,456 --> 01:04:33,832 Now, my agenda-- 1024 01:04:33,916 --> 01:04:35,459 I'll tell you about our agenda. 1025 01:04:35,501 --> 01:04:37,211 It's to have a debate right now! 1026 01:04:37,294 --> 01:04:39,963 Get rid of this zero and talk to the hero. 1027 01:04:42,216 --> 01:04:44,468 You got time to jog, but not to debate? 1028 01:04:44,510 --> 01:04:46,011 You can run, but you can't hide. 1029 01:04:46,094 --> 01:04:47,763 I thought I told you we won't stop. 1030 01:04:48,472 --> 01:04:51,391 What you looking for, the news? The news is we want to debate! 1031 01:04:51,850 --> 01:04:54,436 -Why did you change the channel? -He's scared! 1032 01:04:55,437 --> 01:04:57,689 -A word from our sponsor. -We want to debate! 1033 01:04:57,773 --> 01:05:00,943 I thought I told you that we won't stop. 1034 01:05:03,987 --> 01:05:05,113 Yo, Lewis! 1035 01:05:05,280 --> 01:05:09,034 Your mother's ass is so big, when she sits down she's three feet taller. 1036 01:05:09,576 --> 01:05:12,704 Yo, Lewis! Your mother's got a really big ass! 1037 01:05:12,788 --> 01:05:15,374 Sir, it's time we prepare for a debate. 1038 01:05:15,457 --> 01:05:18,252 Give me one good reason I should debate that jerk. 1039 01:05:18,335 --> 01:05:20,963 -He talked about your mother! -So what? 1040 01:05:22,214 --> 01:05:25,634 Are you going to just let him talk about me like that? 1041 01:05:30,597 --> 01:05:34,560 After some inventive chiding on the part of Alderman Mays Gilliam... 1042 01:05:34,601 --> 01:05:38,313 Vice President Lewis has finally agreed to one debate... 1043 01:05:38,647 --> 01:05:40,983 the night before the election. 1044 01:05:42,401 --> 01:05:44,945 So, baby brother, this is it. You ready? 1045 01:05:45,946 --> 01:05:47,531 All right, I guess. 1046 01:05:47,573 --> 01:05:50,367 You guess? You don't know? You either ready or you ain't. 1047 01:05:51,201 --> 01:05:53,662 What's your problem? I'm ready, okay? 1048 01:05:53,996 --> 01:05:58,041 No, you ain't. Look at you. If you call this ready, this won't get it. 1049 01:05:58,125 --> 01:06:00,961 Dress for the job you want, not for the job you got. 1050 01:06:01,044 --> 01:06:02,754 You ain't talking about my clothes. 1051 01:06:02,838 --> 01:06:04,882 Come on now. This ain't about me. 1052 01:06:05,048 --> 01:06:08,802 If I got a good idea, it shouldn't matter what the hell I'm wearing! 1053 01:06:09,636 --> 01:06:11,471 You know you messed up, man. 1054 01:06:12,222 --> 01:06:13,849 I'm telling you right now. 1055 01:06:14,099 --> 01:06:16,101 You know, this ain't about me! 1056 01:06:19,021 --> 01:06:21,106 Lewis ain't no punk. He ain't no joke. 1057 01:06:21,273 --> 01:06:24,067 That man has been Vice President for eight years. 1058 01:06:24,485 --> 01:06:26,987 He's a war hero. He's Sharon Stone's cousin. 1059 01:06:27,070 --> 01:06:28,530 You better come correct. 1060 01:06:29,740 --> 01:06:32,034 Yeah? Well, I got us this far! 1061 01:06:33,577 --> 01:06:35,704 This is as far as you're going to get! 1062 01:06:36,205 --> 01:06:38,707 -It's like that? -That's the way it is. 1063 01:06:38,790 --> 01:06:41,084 Geller and them up there pumping your head up. 1064 01:06:41,126 --> 01:06:43,295 But Lewis will smack it back down! 1065 01:07:03,607 --> 01:07:05,067 Oh, my God. 1066 01:07:05,567 --> 01:07:07,277 Little brother, you all right? 1067 01:07:11,198 --> 01:07:12,908 That's what your ass get. 1068 01:07:12,991 --> 01:07:15,869 You need anything? Because it look like you need some help. 1069 01:07:15,953 --> 01:07:18,247 You gonna get yours! I'll tell Ma! 1070 01:07:18,330 --> 01:07:19,581 You better not tell! 1071 01:07:25,838 --> 01:07:26,797 Hello? 1072 01:07:28,674 --> 01:07:33,428 Don't intrude in my life anymore. I don't want to have anything to do with you... 1073 01:07:33,512 --> 01:07:35,139 not after the way you treated me. 1074 01:07:35,180 --> 01:07:38,600 I'm sorry I threw you off the bus. It was wrong. 1075 01:07:38,684 --> 01:07:40,978 I couldn't take what you were saying. 1076 01:07:41,061 --> 01:07:42,354 What do you want? 1077 01:07:43,188 --> 01:07:44,481 I want to win. 1078 01:07:52,364 --> 01:07:56,368 Welcome to New York City for the 2004 Presidential Debates. 1079 01:07:57,077 --> 01:07:58,120 Where is he? 1080 01:07:58,203 --> 01:08:00,372 He was right behind me. Should I look for him? 1081 01:08:00,455 --> 01:08:02,833 -They're getting nervous. -We've got to do something. 1082 01:08:02,916 --> 01:08:04,585 -I can do something. -No! 1083 01:08:05,127 --> 01:08:09,423 Ladies and gentlemen, Vice President Brian Lewis. 1084 01:08:20,809 --> 01:08:22,978 Wait. Here they come. 1085 01:08:25,397 --> 01:08:26,523 Sweet. 1086 01:08:27,566 --> 01:08:29,067 Hello, Martin. 1087 01:08:29,318 --> 01:08:31,904 Sorry I'm late. I had to change. 1088 01:08:31,987 --> 01:08:35,073 -Mr. Earl, nice to see you. -Nice to see you too, sir. 1089 01:08:35,199 --> 01:08:36,450 Let's move. 1090 01:08:38,535 --> 01:08:42,206 There are 250 million people out there deciding who to vote for. 1091 01:08:42,247 --> 01:08:45,334 They all know Lewis didn't want to debate you. Show them why. 1092 01:08:45,417 --> 01:08:48,337 -Stay focused. -Take your time. 1093 01:08:48,420 --> 01:08:51,381 If he get out of pocket, put your foot in his ass. 1094 01:08:51,548 --> 01:08:53,300 By the way, nice suit. 1095 01:08:54,927 --> 01:08:57,054 -"Fuh-buh"? -Fubu. 1096 01:08:57,137 --> 01:08:58,764 Even I knew that. 1097 01:09:00,265 --> 01:09:04,186 Ladies and gentlemen, Alderman Mays Gilliam. 1098 01:09:16,782 --> 01:09:19,076 Yo, when's Martin coming on, man? 1099 01:09:21,703 --> 01:09:23,789 My momma told me to whoop your ass. 1100 01:09:29,044 --> 01:09:33,757 The first question is directed by coin flip to the Vice President. 1101 01:09:34,341 --> 01:09:36,093 Vice President Lewis... 1102 01:09:36,218 --> 01:09:38,929 what steps should be taken to limit our youth's access... 1103 01:09:38,971 --> 01:09:40,722 to violent materials? 1104 01:09:40,806 --> 01:09:44,017 Our American children's futures are at stake here. 1105 01:09:44,643 --> 01:09:48,814 We need to study this issue, and appropriate legislation... 1106 01:09:48,897 --> 01:09:52,109 that will return us to an America we can be proud of. 1107 01:09:52,943 --> 01:09:55,571 God bless America, and no place else. 1108 01:10:00,492 --> 01:10:03,704 Alderman Gilliam, same question, please. 1109 01:10:03,787 --> 01:10:06,582 How do we limit violent material? Turn it off. 1110 01:10:06,832 --> 01:10:09,668 And if the kids cut it back on, knock them out. 1111 01:10:09,793 --> 01:10:11,211 That's why I don't smoke. 1112 01:10:11,295 --> 01:10:13,672 When I was a kid, my daddy caught me smoking... 1113 01:10:13,755 --> 01:10:15,299 and he knocked me out! 1114 01:10:15,507 --> 01:10:18,886 And to this day, I don't smoke. Not because I'm scared of cancer. 1115 01:10:18,969 --> 01:10:22,431 I don't smoke because I think my dad is going to walk through that door... 1116 01:10:22,514 --> 01:10:24,558 and knock me the hell out! 1117 01:10:24,933 --> 01:10:27,060 Knock out your kids. It helps. 1118 01:10:36,153 --> 01:10:37,779 Vice President Lewis... 1119 01:10:37,863 --> 01:10:41,742 with over 10,000 gun deaths per year in the United States... 1120 01:10:42,284 --> 01:10:44,995 do you believe we need stricter gun control laws? 1121 01:10:45,078 --> 01:10:47,247 I don't think we need more gun control. 1122 01:10:47,331 --> 01:10:50,417 I say we enforce the laws that are already on the books. 1123 01:10:50,501 --> 01:10:53,337 The problem is, nobody reads the books. 1124 01:10:53,378 --> 01:10:56,423 We need to start putting laws on videos... 1125 01:10:56,507 --> 01:10:59,635 because everybody watches videos, MTV, BET. 1126 01:10:59,718 --> 01:11:02,262 We need to put some laws on the Nelly video. 1127 01:11:02,554 --> 01:11:07,392 If you had laws on a Destiny's Child video right now, you could stop crime. 1128 01:11:07,476 --> 01:11:11,021 -We already have gun licensing. -But that's only to carry the gun. 1129 01:11:11,104 --> 01:11:12,648 Let the people decide. 1130 01:11:12,731 --> 01:11:16,318 The people can't decide. The people are too busy getting shot in the ass. 1131 01:11:36,046 --> 01:11:37,256 That's my brother. 1132 01:11:37,339 --> 01:11:40,050 That's another reason he's not qualified. 1133 01:11:40,217 --> 01:11:43,804 Because I had the good sense to pick my big brother to be my running mate? 1134 01:11:43,971 --> 01:11:46,014 I didn't come here to argue with you. 1135 01:11:46,098 --> 01:11:49,726 Yes, you did. We're having a debate. A debate ain't nothing but an argument. 1136 01:11:49,810 --> 01:11:51,478 A debate isn't an argument. 1137 01:11:51,645 --> 01:11:53,814 -Yes, it is. -No, it isn't. 1138 01:11:54,565 --> 01:11:56,733 -Yes, it is. -No, it isn't. 1139 01:11:57,442 --> 01:11:59,528 I know you are, but what am l? 1140 01:12:06,660 --> 01:12:09,246 Can we just move on? This is ridiculous. 1141 01:12:09,288 --> 01:12:10,622 Our next question comes from-- 1142 01:12:10,706 --> 01:12:11,832 I have a question. 1143 01:12:12,457 --> 01:12:16,044 Would you like our reception to be buffet style or formal seating? 1144 01:12:16,128 --> 01:12:18,172 If you put Robert next to Nelson... 1145 01:12:18,255 --> 01:12:21,341 he'll be very angry because he wanted to be your best man. 1146 01:12:21,425 --> 01:12:23,260 Security. 1147 01:12:23,302 --> 01:12:24,845 I love you so much-- 1148 01:12:26,221 --> 01:12:29,016 The candidates have agreed upon a short closing speech. 1149 01:12:29,099 --> 01:12:32,186 Vice President Lewis won the coin toss. 1150 01:12:32,269 --> 01:12:33,937 He has elected to go first. 1151 01:12:34,104 --> 01:12:35,355 Thank you. 1152 01:12:36,315 --> 01:12:38,400 -No, it isn't. -Yes, it is! 1153 01:12:38,859 --> 01:12:42,404 Tonight you have seen two different men... 1154 01:12:42,571 --> 01:12:46,366 with two very different points of view, battle to win your vote. 1155 01:12:47,159 --> 01:12:49,620 And this is what America is all about. 1156 01:12:50,662 --> 01:12:52,456 As we've seen tonight... 1157 01:12:52,623 --> 01:12:57,085 Alderman Gilliam can be captivating and entertaining. 1158 01:12:57,961 --> 01:13:01,465 But America needs more than that from its Commander in Chief. 1159 01:13:01,840 --> 01:13:04,885 To lead America, it takes experience. 1160 01:13:05,177 --> 01:13:08,597 Now, I've been Vice President for the last eight years. 1161 01:13:09,223 --> 01:13:13,143 I'm a war hero, and I'm Sharon Stone's cousin. 1162 01:13:14,520 --> 01:13:18,482 And to me, America is like a fine performance car. 1163 01:13:19,191 --> 01:13:21,819 And now is not the time... 1164 01:13:22,319 --> 01:13:25,197 to turn this fine vehicle we call America... 1165 01:13:25,697 --> 01:13:28,116 over to the hands of an amateur. 1166 01:13:31,036 --> 01:13:34,748 I'm Brian Lewis, and I am your last chance. 1167 01:13:35,749 --> 01:13:38,836 God bless America, and no place else. 1168 01:13:43,882 --> 01:13:46,385 Yeah, it's over now. 1169 01:13:47,427 --> 01:13:49,304 Why do you have to be so negative? 1170 01:13:50,264 --> 01:13:51,515 Give me five. 1171 01:13:51,598 --> 01:13:52,850 Thank you. 1172 01:13:55,185 --> 01:13:56,520 Hold it! 1173 01:14:08,073 --> 01:14:11,368 You're right, Vice President Lewis. I am an amateur. 1174 01:14:11,910 --> 01:14:14,079 When it comes to creating so many enemies... 1175 01:14:14,163 --> 01:14:18,375 that we need billions of dollars to protect ourselves, I'm an amateur. 1176 01:14:18,458 --> 01:14:21,336 When it comes to paying farmers not to grow food... 1177 01:14:21,420 --> 01:14:24,840 while people in this country starve every day, I'm an amateur. 1178 01:14:24,923 --> 01:14:29,094 When it comes to creating a drug policy that makes crack and heroin... 1179 01:14:29,178 --> 01:14:32,681 cheaper than asthma and AIDS medicine, I'm an amateur. 1180 01:14:32,764 --> 01:14:35,142 But there's nothing wrong with being an amateur. 1181 01:14:35,225 --> 01:14:38,562 The people that started the Underground Railroad were amateurs. 1182 01:14:38,604 --> 01:14:41,064 Martin Luther King was an amateur. 1183 01:14:41,440 --> 01:14:44,067 Have you ever been to Amateur Night at the Apollo? 1184 01:14:44,109 --> 01:14:46,320 Some of the world's best talent was there: 1185 01:14:46,403 --> 01:14:50,866 James Brown, Luther Vandross, Rockwell, the Crown Heights Affair. 1186 01:14:50,949 --> 01:14:53,785 -Hall and Oates! -The Fat Boys, Rob Base. 1187 01:14:53,869 --> 01:14:56,330 But you wouldn't know nothing about that. Why? 1188 01:14:56,413 --> 01:14:59,208 Because when it comes to judging talent and potential... 1189 01:14:59,291 --> 01:15:01,543 you, my friend, are an amateur! 1190 01:15:07,132 --> 01:15:11,595 -I believe the Alderman is over his time. -You had eight years to talk. 1191 01:15:11,637 --> 01:15:14,932 Now it's my turn. I'm getting mine! 1192 01:15:17,142 --> 01:15:19,603 Ladies and gentlemen, hold your applause, please. 1193 01:15:19,686 --> 01:15:22,439 How can you help the poor if you never been poor? 1194 01:15:22,481 --> 01:15:25,943 How can you stop crime if you don't know no criminals? 1195 01:15:26,026 --> 01:15:30,531 How can you make drug policy if you never smoked a chronic? 1196 01:15:31,490 --> 01:15:34,201 How can you do that? Just a nickel bag! 1197 01:15:34,827 --> 01:15:36,578 I'm a real American. 1198 01:15:36,662 --> 01:15:40,749 I've been high, I've been robbed, I've been broke. 1199 01:15:40,833 --> 01:15:45,295 My credit is horrible! They won't even take my cash! 1200 01:15:45,838 --> 01:15:49,967 You're always talking about, "God bless America, and no place else." 1201 01:15:50,050 --> 01:15:52,803 But isn't it obvious that God has blessed America? 1202 01:15:52,886 --> 01:15:56,473 America is the richest, most powerful nation on earth. 1203 01:15:56,890 --> 01:16:01,228 If America was a woman, it would be a big-titty woman. 1204 01:16:01,311 --> 01:16:03,939 And everybody loves a big-titty woman! 1205 01:16:04,314 --> 01:16:05,983 So, in closing... 1206 01:16:06,024 --> 01:16:08,735 I'd like to say you are full of shit. 1207 01:16:10,237 --> 01:16:13,031 "God bless America, and no place else." 1208 01:16:13,115 --> 01:16:16,618 How about "God bless Haiti" or "God bless Africa"? 1209 01:16:16,702 --> 01:16:18,495 How about "God bless Jamaica"? 1210 01:16:18,579 --> 01:16:22,166 I'm not talking about Jamaica, the beach tribes you all love. 1211 01:16:22,249 --> 01:16:26,128 I'm talking about stabbing Jamaica. That's what I'm talking about. 1212 01:16:26,211 --> 01:16:31,091 So, tonight I want to say: "God bless America, and everybody else!" 1213 01:16:31,592 --> 01:16:33,802 The whole world! God bless you! 1214 01:16:33,886 --> 01:16:38,348 I'm Mays Gilliam, and I'm running for President of the United States of America. 1215 01:16:38,557 --> 01:16:39,766 Ya heard? 1216 01:17:02,372 --> 01:17:04,374 Now we can watch Martin! 1217 01:17:17,596 --> 01:17:20,641 -Hello? -Good morning, Mr. President. 1218 01:17:22,267 --> 01:17:25,562 -What time is it? -I think it's a little after 7:00. 1219 01:17:25,938 --> 01:17:29,399 -Lisa, I need some help in here! -Will you wait a damn minute? 1220 01:17:29,775 --> 01:17:32,945 I was so proud of you. You were so good last night. 1221 01:17:35,239 --> 01:17:39,576 Tonight, no matter what, win or lose, I want to see you. 1222 01:17:39,618 --> 01:17:41,870 I don't know. I might have to work. 1223 01:17:41,954 --> 01:17:44,456 But if I don't see you tonight, I will see you soon. 1224 01:17:44,540 --> 01:17:48,669 Just run your race, get out there, and do what you got to do, okay? 1225 01:17:48,836 --> 01:17:51,588 -I'll talk to you later. Bye. -All right. 1226 01:17:52,130 --> 01:17:55,592 It's Election Day, Tuesday, November 8, 2004. 1227 01:17:55,634 --> 01:17:57,511 The stage is set for what will be... 1228 01:17:57,594 --> 01:18:00,430 one of the most dramatic campaign finales of all time. 1229 01:18:00,514 --> 01:18:04,101 The question everyone's asking is: "Who will America vote for?" 1230 01:18:04,810 --> 01:18:06,436 I voted for Mays Gilliam. 1231 01:18:06,478 --> 01:18:09,189 -I voted for big business. -I voted for Lewis. 1232 01:18:09,314 --> 01:18:11,942 Who the fuck you think I'm voting for? 1233 01:18:12,359 --> 01:18:14,153 There seems to be an agreement... 1234 01:18:14,236 --> 01:18:17,614 between Washington, D.C., officials and transit authority operators... 1235 01:18:17,698 --> 01:18:20,409 regarding the shutdown of the 9th Ward bus line. 1236 01:18:20,492 --> 01:18:23,120 I don't see how they could do this to us. 1237 01:18:23,203 --> 01:18:26,540 People got to make money and get to work. 1238 01:18:27,082 --> 01:18:32,004 -Show them how you do it. -The roof, the roof, the roof is on fire 1239 01:18:32,087 --> 01:18:35,299 You're not gonna believe this. We got the Teamsters! 1240 01:18:35,382 --> 01:18:39,136 -That's great, little brother! -They'll announce it at a press conference. 1241 01:18:39,178 --> 01:18:41,805 You just have to go, shake hands, take photographs... 1242 01:18:41,889 --> 01:18:43,640 but it is yours. 1243 01:18:46,059 --> 01:18:47,186 What's the matter? 1244 01:18:47,269 --> 01:18:51,064 If they shut down this bus service, I will drive you to work myself. 1245 01:18:52,149 --> 01:18:54,776 -I can't do it. -But it's Election Day! 1246 01:18:54,860 --> 01:18:57,654 You have to get the endorsement. You said you want to win. 1247 01:18:57,738 --> 01:19:00,824 You can't snub the Teamsters. You want them to endorse Lewis? 1248 01:19:00,908 --> 01:19:03,660 I'm not worried about Lewis. I'm running my race. 1249 01:19:03,744 --> 01:19:06,205 Go ahead, baby brother. I got this. 1250 01:19:08,207 --> 01:19:11,001 -You're just gonna let him go? -He's a grown man. 1251 01:19:11,084 --> 01:19:14,922 They shut down the whole bus line. What can he do about that? 1252 01:19:23,764 --> 01:19:28,060 In the latest exit poll, Vice President Lewis has 51 percent of the vote. 1253 01:19:28,143 --> 01:19:29,853 Bring him back. He got to vote. 1254 01:19:29,895 --> 01:19:33,398 ...while Mays Gilliam is posting an impressive 47 percent. 1255 01:19:34,650 --> 01:19:36,777 You gotta get to the back of the bus. 1256 01:19:36,860 --> 01:19:38,612 I'm just playing. Come on. 1257 01:19:38,987 --> 01:19:42,866 Now, he and Vice President Lewis are in a statistical dead heat. 1258 01:19:42,950 --> 01:19:44,451 Come on, hoes! 1259 01:19:44,576 --> 01:19:48,747 While Lewis and Mitch Gilliam have been working the campaign trail... 1260 01:19:49,039 --> 01:19:52,167 Mays Gilliam has been out driving people to work. 1261 01:19:54,586 --> 01:19:57,548 Damn it! Why didn't somebody around here think of this? 1262 01:19:57,589 --> 01:20:00,134 Why am I not out there driving a damn bus? 1263 01:20:00,217 --> 01:20:03,512 Get me an SUV, a minivan, a bus, a scooter... 1264 01:20:03,595 --> 01:20:05,681 a motorcycle, or a rickshaw. 1265 01:20:05,764 --> 01:20:07,224 Get me some wheels, bitch! 1266 01:20:08,600 --> 01:20:10,394 Are you going uptown? 1267 01:20:11,645 --> 01:20:13,522 Come on. Wait a minute! 1268 01:20:14,815 --> 01:20:16,942 We could write our own vows! 1269 01:20:17,818 --> 01:20:20,737 I love you, Mays! 1270 01:20:22,156 --> 01:20:25,742 With the polls about 30 minutes from closing on the East Coast... 1271 01:20:25,784 --> 01:20:29,454 Mays Gilliam is actually ahead by several points. 1272 01:20:32,082 --> 01:20:34,626 There is no question that Lewis has Texas. 1273 01:20:36,461 --> 01:20:39,756 It seems clear Gilliam is going to take New York. 1274 01:20:44,136 --> 01:20:45,095 New York! 1275 01:20:45,179 --> 01:20:47,264 It's likely Lewis will take Michigan. 1276 01:20:49,099 --> 01:20:53,020 It looks like Gilliam might just pull an upset in Illinois. 1277 01:20:54,813 --> 01:20:56,315 Illinois! 1278 01:20:57,316 --> 01:20:58,275 Go, Mays! 1279 01:20:58,317 --> 01:21:01,028 This looks like it may come down to California. 1280 01:21:01,111 --> 01:21:03,697 This looks like it may come down to California. 1281 01:21:03,780 --> 01:21:06,241 This looks like it may come down to California. 1282 01:21:08,202 --> 01:21:11,663 I need to know. How real is this? Can we win without California? 1283 01:21:11,747 --> 01:21:15,292 We stand a chance if you call your connections to the energy companies-- 1284 01:21:15,375 --> 01:21:17,961 No, you can't win without California. 1285 01:21:18,128 --> 01:21:19,546 What are you doing here? 1286 01:21:19,630 --> 01:21:22,966 Shut up. You want to win, you'll do what I tell you. 1287 01:21:23,342 --> 01:21:26,261 Gilliam has over 90 percent minority turnout. 1288 01:21:26,345 --> 01:21:30,516 Whites are the majority, but they're not voting. They don't like you. 1289 01:21:30,849 --> 01:21:32,851 -I like you, sir. -Shut up. 1290 01:21:33,393 --> 01:21:35,103 How can we turn this around? 1291 01:21:35,187 --> 01:21:38,565 There's about one and a half hours left at the West Coast polls. 1292 01:21:38,649 --> 01:21:42,402 If there's a leak saying Gilliam is going to win, you'll get a late rush. 1293 01:21:42,486 --> 01:21:45,280 You get California, you get the election. 1294 01:21:46,323 --> 01:21:50,994 It will make the 6:30 news if we do it now. We just have to put it out there. 1295 01:21:51,036 --> 01:21:54,331 -Can we do this? -We're the government. We can do anything. 1296 01:21:55,249 --> 01:21:58,001 The race for President now turns to the West Coast. 1297 01:21:58,085 --> 01:22:01,088 People, Armageddon is upon us and Big Dave is scared. 1298 01:22:01,171 --> 01:22:05,592 If these voting trends sustain, it's likely that for the first time in history... 1299 01:22:05,676 --> 01:22:09,721 a black man will become President of the United States of America. 1300 01:22:45,924 --> 01:22:49,636 "I have a dream that one day... 1301 01:22:51,430 --> 01:22:53,765 "this nation will rise up... 1302 01:22:55,100 --> 01:22:58,020 "and live out the true meaning of its creed: 1303 01:22:58,937 --> 01:23:02,065 "'We hold these truths to be self-evident: 1304 01:23:02,316 --> 01:23:04,651 "'that all men are created equal. "' 1305 01:23:05,611 --> 01:23:06,612 Checkmate. 1306 01:23:06,695 --> 01:23:09,072 I, Richard Nixon, do solemnly swear.... 1307 01:23:09,156 --> 01:23:11,366 I, Ronald Reagan, do solemnly swear.... 1308 01:23:18,373 --> 01:23:20,209 The race for President is over. 1309 01:23:21,752 --> 01:23:23,253 The election is now over. 1310 01:23:23,337 --> 01:23:25,714 -The race for President.... -...is over. 1311 01:23:28,300 --> 01:23:30,344 The race for President is over. 1312 01:23:30,719 --> 01:23:34,765 For the first time in history, a black man, Mays Gilliam... 1313 01:23:35,516 --> 01:23:39,353 will be the next President of the United States of America. 1314 01:23:58,497 --> 01:24:00,165 Come here, brother. 1315 01:24:02,835 --> 01:24:04,920 -I love you, man! -I love you, too. 1316 01:24:13,971 --> 01:24:16,181 I appreciate it. Thanks a lot. 1317 01:24:18,892 --> 01:24:20,227 Thank you. 1318 01:24:22,855 --> 01:24:25,732 We won! Aren't you happy? 1319 01:24:26,191 --> 01:24:28,235 -Can I have a massage? -Yes! 1320 01:24:28,652 --> 01:24:30,487 I won! 1321 01:24:32,364 --> 01:24:35,742 There is no way in the world I could have ever done this without you. 1322 01:24:35,826 --> 01:24:36,994 You're damn right. 1323 01:24:37,077 --> 01:24:40,122 We won! We did it! Yes! 1324 01:24:42,040 --> 01:24:43,959 Look at my little brother! 1325 01:24:44,042 --> 01:24:47,713 -Boy, I'm proud of you! Mr. President! -Mr. Vice President. 1326 01:24:47,838 --> 01:24:52,301 You're the man! You ain't got to worry about no assassinations or nothing. 1327 01:24:52,384 --> 01:24:54,803 They sure don't want me to be the next President. 1328 01:24:54,887 --> 01:24:57,055 You can raise taxes, start a war.... 1329 01:24:57,139 --> 01:24:58,849 Mays Gilliam began this race.... 1330 01:24:58,932 --> 01:25:01,852 That's my man! 1331 01:25:03,812 --> 01:25:05,481 Excuse me, please. 1332 01:25:07,191 --> 01:25:09,651 -I've been looking for you. -I was looking for you. 1333 01:25:09,735 --> 01:25:12,196 -This is amazing! -It's amazing. 1334 01:25:12,279 --> 01:25:14,072 It's incredible. 1335 01:25:14,156 --> 01:25:16,241 -What you were up against. -The odds! 1336 01:25:16,325 --> 01:25:19,703 I can't wait to start working, and do I have a job for you! 1337 01:25:20,496 --> 01:25:24,374 I don't know what to say. What department do you want me to work in? Finance? 1338 01:25:24,416 --> 01:25:27,503 No, that's not good enough for you. 1339 01:25:27,586 --> 01:25:29,963 -Foreign Affairs? -No, not Foreign Affairs. 1340 01:25:30,047 --> 01:25:33,217 I thought you could do something real good in Security! 1341 01:25:34,134 --> 01:25:35,385 You suck! 1342 01:25:40,432 --> 01:25:43,644 We'd like you to run for President. 1343 01:25:44,061 --> 01:25:47,356 Sometimes, you don't know if people like you for you. 1344 01:25:47,773 --> 01:25:49,566 I like you for you. 1345 01:25:49,817 --> 01:25:51,318 Thanks a lot. 1346 01:25:53,779 --> 01:25:56,073 Get your hand off my ass, boy! 1347 01:25:57,616 --> 01:25:58,742 Wait! 1348 01:26:02,412 --> 01:26:05,582 Oh, my God, you are everywhere. Look at you! 1349 01:26:08,168 --> 01:26:11,046 What's the first thing you're going to do, Mr. President? 1350 01:26:11,129 --> 01:26:14,299 The first thing I'll do is make you my First Lady. 1351 01:26:15,134 --> 01:26:17,803 -Don't you play with me like that. -I'm not playing. 1352 01:26:17,886 --> 01:26:19,096 You can't do that! 1353 01:26:19,138 --> 01:26:21,765 I'm the government. I can do anything. 1354 01:26:38,490 --> 01:26:39,616 Get ready for... 1355 01:26:39,700 --> 01:26:43,745 the 2005 Presidential Inaugural Ball. 1356 01:26:43,871 --> 01:26:48,584 Ladies and gentlemen, the President of the United States of America... 1357 01:26:48,667 --> 01:26:52,504 Mays Gilliam, and his future First Wifey... 1358 01:26:52,588 --> 01:26:54,131 Lisa Clark! 1359 01:27:06,351 --> 01:27:08,645 Look at him now, man Ain't this great 1360 01:27:08,687 --> 01:27:10,856 Biggest man in town He's the head of state 1361 01:27:10,939 --> 01:27:13,442 They come from all around just for one handshake 1362 01:27:13,525 --> 01:27:16,695 Look at him now He's the head of state 1363 01:27:22,868 --> 01:27:25,662 That's me, Mays Gilliam... 1364 01:27:25,787 --> 01:27:28,665 President of the United States of America. 1365 01:27:29,041 --> 01:27:30,459 North America. 1366 01:27:37,591 --> 01:27:39,343 -Who did you vote for? -For what? 1367 01:27:39,384 --> 01:27:40,928 -For President. -Of what? 1368 01:27:41,011 --> 01:27:43,347 -Of the United States. -Of what? 1369 01:27:43,430 --> 01:27:45,182 -Of America. -What America? 1370 01:27:45,224 --> 01:27:46,350 North America. 1371 01:27:46,433 --> 01:27:49,478 Slick, I don't vote. You gonna buy some of this meat, or what? 1372 01:27:49,686 --> 01:27:54,149 You can't trust nobody. Everybody's trying to rob you. Nobody! 1373 01:27:54,274 --> 01:27:56,693 That guy right there! Don't trust him! 1374 01:27:56,777 --> 01:27:58,612 Can't trust no-damn-body! 1375 01:27:58,695 --> 01:28:01,281 America is taking advantage of you! 1376 01:28:01,406 --> 01:28:06,036 You can go to war when you're 18, but you can't have a drink till you're 21! 1377 01:28:06,245 --> 01:28:09,498 -That ain't right! -Right! So, let me get this straight. 1378 01:28:09,581 --> 01:28:11,875 You're 18 years old. You go to war. 1379 01:28:11,917 --> 01:28:14,378 You come back. Your leg is chopped off! 1380 01:28:14,419 --> 01:28:16,129 You got a damn nub! 1381 01:28:16,213 --> 01:28:18,674 Everywhere you go they say, "What's up, nubby?" 1382 01:28:18,757 --> 01:28:22,219 You get to the bar and say, "Bartender, can I have a drink?" 1383 01:28:22,302 --> 01:28:26,014 He looks you up and down and says, "l got to see some ID." 1384 01:28:26,098 --> 01:28:30,769 ID? You mean to tell me a one-legged teenager can't have a drink? 1385 01:28:30,936 --> 01:28:34,523 -That ain't right! -Where is the nub? 1386 01:28:34,606 --> 01:28:38,902 Prescription drugs, I'll lower the prices. Let me explain something else to you. 1387 01:28:38,986 --> 01:28:40,571 You can survive a stroke... 1388 01:28:40,654 --> 01:28:44,116 but the high prices of medicine will give you a heart attack. 1389 01:28:44,158 --> 01:28:47,911 America is the richest, most powerful nation on earth. 1390 01:28:47,995 --> 01:28:52,040 If America was a car, it would be a Bentley... 1391 01:28:52,124 --> 01:28:56,545 sitting on chrome doves, with TVs in the headrests... 1392 01:28:56,628 --> 01:29:00,090 and a fine, naked Puerto Rican girl feeding you grapes! 1393 01:29:00,382 --> 01:29:03,927 Ain't nothing better than that! Ain't nothing ever been better than that! 1394 01:29:04,011 --> 01:29:08,182 Most opponents are saying your brother destroyed any chance of winning... 1395 01:29:08,265 --> 01:29:10,392 by naming you as his running mate. Why? 1396 01:29:10,476 --> 01:29:13,187 -Why'd your brother make you anchorman? -I don't have-- 1397 01:29:13,270 --> 01:29:16,523 You said it was your brother. I did my homework as well, okay? 1398 01:29:16,607 --> 01:29:18,692 You got your job same way I got mine. 1399 01:29:18,775 --> 01:29:22,446 -I'm not running for public office. -I'm not running for anchorman.