{10}{51}COWBO Y, WHISTLING: Hyah!
{72}{92}COWBO YS: # Out in the land #
{92}{160}# Where the men are tough as cactus #
{160}{227}# Out in the land where the wild, wild|west was won #
{267}{304}Uhh! Ahh...
{304}{353}# Out in the land of the desperado #
{354}{402}# If you're soft as an avocado #
{403}{445}# Yee-haw! You're guacamole, son #
{445}{504}# Oh, home, this ain't it, pal #
{504}{549}# Home, home, home on the range #
{550}{603}# Home, home, better go git, pal #
{603}{669}# You ain't home on the range #
{669}{744}# Out in the land where the weak are|target practice #
{744}{785}# Out in the land where they shoot the|mild and meek #
{785}{846}Ooh! Aah!
{846}{906}# Out where the bad are a whole lot|badder #
{906}{958}# If you're the type with a nervous|bladder #
{958}{1036}# Yip! Yow! Your saddle's gonna reek #
{1036}{1100}# 'Cause you ain't home on the range #
{1100}{1163}# Cowboy, you're really up a creek #
{1163}{1210}# Home, home, home on the range #
{1210}{1262}# Home, home, home on the range #
{1262}{1308}# Home, home, home on the range #
{1308}{1332}COWBO Y: Howdy, sheriff!
{1332}{1363}[Snorts]
{1491}{1522}[Snorts]
{1580}{1642}Home on the range.
{1643}{1744}Once upon a time,|I had a home on the range.
{1745}{1815}But not anymore.
{1816}{1911}Well, it's no use|cryin' over spilled milk.
{1912}{1974}Speakin' of which, that's me.
{1975}{2009}I'm the cow.
{2040}{2076}Yeah, they're real.
{2077}{2127}Quit staring.
{2128}{2188}I'm sort of between homes|right now.
{2189}{2234}I lost my old place...
{2235}{2331}thanks to the meanest bunch of|cattle rustlers in the west--
{2332}{2426}Alameda Slim|and the Willie Brothers gang.
{2579}{2643}Somehow they stole the whole herd...
{2644}{2683}right out|from under our noses...
{2684}{2779}and then they disappeared|without a trace.
{2878}{2927}After that...
{2928}{3020}poor old Abner couldn't|afford to keep the place...
{3021}{3086}or me, either, for that matter.
{3189}{3256}Well, no matter how bad|things get...
{3257}{3326}there's probably somebody|worse off.
{3408}{3454}That guy, for instance.
{3455}{3493}Hey, Maggie.
{3494}{3544}Take a look at your new home.
{3544}{3626}Hey! A dairy farm?
{3627}{3685}Now we're talkin'!
{3686}{3757}Hope it's not one of them|fat-free places.
{3799}{3854}K.D. LANG: # I know a place #
{3854}{3922}# Pretty as pie #
{3922}{3966}# Out where the river bend #
{3966}{4032}# Hits up with the end of the sky #
{4032}{4097}# It's left of Nebraska #
{4097}{4161}# And over a crest #
{4161}{4271}# On a little Patch of Heaven way out|west #
{4271}{4324}# Everything's green #
{4324}{4385}# Know what I mean? #
{4385}{4434}# Darlin', it's quite the sweetest sight #
{4435}{4500}# That you ever done seen #
{4500}{4565}# Ain't nothin' much out there #
{4565}{4619}# Just life at its best #
{4619}{4756}# On a little Patch of Heaven way out|west #
{4756}{4808}# Bees by the dozen #
{4808}{4873}# Are buzzin' real peaceful #
{4873}{4952}# Every bluebonnet, doggone it, smells|nice #
{4952}{4991}[Sneezes]
{4991}{5051}# Even the tumblin' tumbleweed #
{5051}{5096}# Slows down to match your speed #
{5096}{5188}# On my tiny half an acre of paradise #
{5188}{5250}# Darlin', I swear #
{5250}{5312}# Once you been there #
{5312}{5374}# There ain't a view beneath the blue #
{5374}{5430}# That could ever compare #
{5430}{5501}# The only thing missing #
{5501}{5555}# Is you as my guest #
{5555}{5665}# On a little Patch of Heaven way out|west #
{5665}{5737}# Why don't you come visit? #
{5737}{5821}# There's room in the nest #
{5821}{5877}# On that little Patch of Heaven #
{5877}{6010}# Way out we-e-e-e... #
{6007}{6062}[Snoring]
{6062}{6122}#... e-e-e-est #
{6122}{6152}[Cock-a-doodle-doo]
{6153}{6233}Wah! Aaah! Ooh! Uhh!
{6232}{6270}Oh! Uhh!
{6305}{6340}Hey, that's my boy.
{6341}{6380}Can hog! Can hog!
{6381}{6422}Don't yell at me.
{6423}{6469}Oh. The call of duty.
{6470}{6521}Why don't you handle this one,|Grace?
{6522}{6607}It's time I gave you|more responsibility on the farm.
{6607}{6661}Really?
{6663}{6732}Thanks, Mrs. C.|I'll make you proud.
{6733}{6762}Can hog! Can hog!
{6763}{6802}Get off my case,|little cocktail wieners!
{6833}{6902}I'm sensing a lot|of negative energy here.
{6903}{6960}That's our can, and Jeb took it.
{6961}{7019}And now he says it's his can.
{7020}{7086}Now, let's not play|the shame and blame game.
{7087}{7204}This is an organic problem,|and there's a holistic solution.
{7205}{7330}You don't get this whole|farm concept, do you, sister?
{7332}{7362}Kill the goat!
{7457}{7524}-Give it!|-Get the can!
{7525}{7616}-Ahem.|-We're sorry, Mrs. Caloway.
{7617}{7692}Piggies,|why can't you leave Jeb alone?
{7694}{7724}Yeah! Why can't you?
{7725}{7795}The poor old goat|needs peace and quiet.
{7796}{7831}That's right! I need it!
{7832}{7900}So, run along,|and take your can with you.
{7901}{7939}Yeah, you take that can and--
{7940}{7982}Hey! Whoa! Come back here,|you little bacon bits!
{7983}{8077}Jeb, don't you have|enough cans of your own?
{8078}{8144}Uh, no, not really.
{8145}{8216}I'd be happy to take her in,|Abner.
{8217}{8287}There's always room|for one more.
{8288}{8325}Well, thanks, Pearl.
{8326}{8367}I gotta warn you, though.
{8368}{8434}She's--heh heh--|she's a bit headstrong.
{8435}{8487}Oh, now, don't you worry, Abner.
{8488}{8544}I'm sure she'll fit right in.
{8545}{8611}So long, Pearl.|You take care, now.
{8612}{8703}Mrs. Caloway! Oh! Mrs. Caloway!|Mrs. Calo--
{8704}{8825}Mrs. Caloway,|there's a newcomer at the gate.
{8826}{8880}-Not now, Audrey.|-But it's a great big--
{8881}{8951}Everybody? This here is Maggie.
{9084}{9159}Three-time winner|of the Golden Udder Award...
{9160}{9247}and the original|Miss Happy Heifer.
{9248}{9301}A show cow?
{9302}{9343}On Patch of Heaven?
{9677}{9751}Now, I want y'all|to make her feel right at home.
{9752}{9797}You hear me?
{9798}{9851}Hey, thanks, everybody.
{9852}{9931}It's great to be here|in Patch of Heaven.
{9932}{9985}Now, don't everybody speak|at one time.
{9986}{10040}What is this,|the frozen food section?
{10085}{10118}Is this thing on?
{10149}{10222}Good morning, Margaret.
{10223}{10259}What a wonderful surprise...
{10260}{10323}to find a fellow bovine|joining the ranks.
{10324}{10354}Phony.
{10385}{10429}-I'm Mrs. Caloway.|-Hi.
{10430}{10499}-And this is Grace.|-Hi.
{10500}{10574}No applause and trophies here,|I'm afraid.
{10575}{10640}Just the fruits|of our good, honest labor.
{10641}{10670}Hi.
{10671}{10728}Workin' stiffs, huh?
{10729}{10782}Boy, I remember those days.
{10770}{10875}Wow! You're the biggest cow|I have ever saw.
{10876}{10944}Well, if you're in charge,|I'll take that as a compliment.
{10945}{10974}-Uh--|-And if you're not...
{10975}{11013}I guess|I'll just have to sit on you.
{11014}{11059}Mom!
{11060}{11100}Hey, I'm only kidding!
{11100}{11197}Say, what is this you've got|jammed up in your ear?
{11234}{11298}Here, have an apple, kid.
{11299}{11347}Don't go near any luaus, though.
{11348}{11394}Wait a minute.
{11395}{11451}I got somethin' stuck in my ear.
{11489}{11539}This one's for me.
{11572}{11619}Ahh! That was good.
{11620}{11656}ALL: Awesome!
{11657}{11706}Do it again! Do it again!
{11707}{11788}Come on, come on!|Do it again! Do it again!
{11789}{11848}Oh! That's so cool!
{11849}{11903}Maggie's some fun, isn't she?
{11904}{11965}Ohh.|Teaching pigs to throw food.
{11966}{12015}As if they weren't|sloppy enough.
{12017}{12084}I'm goin' long!
{12509}{12577}Dagnabit, Buck, slow down!
{12578}{12673}OK, who's up for a game|of tin-can tag?
{12674}{12714}Hey!|That can is a family heirloom.
{12715}{12811}Whoever wins is gettin'|a free tetanus shot! OK?
{12811}{12841}Superstar comin' through!
{12882}{12911}Awesome!
{12912}{13003}-No autographs, please.|-I got your autograph, pal! Ow!
{13004}{13039}Who's the hotshot?
{13040}{13115}-Oh, it's Buck.|-Puh! City slicker.
{13116}{13198}Oh! Whoa! Whoa!|Dagnabit, Buck!
{13199}{13270}Take it easy.|This ain't no rodeo.
{13271}{13336}Why, good morning, Sam.|Heh heh.
{13337}{13401}Is that ornery horse|gettin' away from you again?
{13402}{13450}Howdy, Pearl.
{13450}{13526}I came out to bring you|another bank notice.
{13527}{13562}This one'll be the last.
{13563}{13615}You know, every time|I get a weak harvest...
{13616}{13662}they send me|one of these here notices.
{13663}{13704}They'll get their money|soon enough.
{13705}{13789}It's a whole new|shootin' match now, Pearl.
{13790}{13841}The bank's callin' in|everybody's debt.
{13842}{13896}They're losin' money|somethin' fierce...
{13897}{13942}with all the cattlemen|goin' under.
{13943}{13994}I'm tellin' you, if they don't|get their money in three days...
{13995}{14048}they're gonna auction off|Patch of Heaven.
{14049}{14096}What?
{14097}{14136}No.
{14137}{14201}But...they can't take my place.
{14202}{14282}Why, I've been here|through twisters, blizzards.
{14328}{14406}Sam, this is my home.
{14445}{14540}I'm sorry, Pearl.|I'm truly sorry.
{14626}{14716}"sorry"|just ain't gonna save my farm.
{14813}{14889}Well, Buck,|I hope you're proud of yourself.
{14890}{14958}As a matter of fact, I am.|Thank you for checking.
{15025}{15138}You know, Pearl,|it don't have to be this way.
{15139}{15208}You've got the best livestock|in the county.
{15209}{15243}All you gotta do...
{15244}{15300}is just sell off|a few of these critters--
{15301}{15337}Stop right there, Sam.
{15338}{15412}They're family.|You don't sell family.
{15413}{15446}Ho-ho-hold your horses, Pearl.
{15447}{15500}Now you get,|before I start using words...
{15501}{15559}no good woman should ever use.
{15560}{15627}-Don't bust your gusset, woman!|-Go on, Sam!
{15628}{15706}It is still my property!|Now get!
{15707}{15749}I said, get!
{15750}{15813}I was just tryin' to help!
{15980}{16034}Oh. Oh.
{16035}{16129}That sure took the starch|right out of me.
{16372}{16413}I am sorry, girls.
{16414}{16520}I'm just plum out of ideas.
{16781}{16801}I think we all know|what happens now.
{16869}{16934}-Jeb, don't start.|-Now we all get eaten.
{16935}{16971}-Jeb?|-What? What?
{16972}{17027}You don't think people in town|eat animals?
{17028}{17094}But who would eat a chicken?
{17095}{17164}Come on, guys. There must be|something we can do.
{17165}{17215}What? What could we do?
{17263}{17343}-This just isn't fair.|-Fair!
{17429}{17477}Uh, what is?
{17478}{17540}Listen. What would you say|if I told you...
{17541}{17610}that you could win big money--
{17611}{17680}and see|beautiful downtown Chugwater--
{17681}{17737}if you went to the County Fair?
{17776}{17820}Thank you for your input, but--
{17821}{17876}Come on! Let the new cow talk!
{17877}{17945}New cow! New cow! New cow!
{17946}{18053}Come on, Mrs. C. You've got|a real good-lookin' bunch here.
{18054}{18097}I see some real potential.
{18137}{18186}The fair is two weeks away.
{18187}{18258}I say we go to town, butter up|that sheriff's horse...
{18259}{18312}and get him|to give us more time.
{18313}{18369}What are we waitin' for, Maggie?|Let's go.
{18370}{18431}That's right.|What do you say, Caloway?
{18432}{18507}Absolutely not.
{18508}{18566}I will not abandon Pearl|in her hour of need...
{18567}{18601}for such a ridiculous plan.
{18601}{18680}She would be devastated|if she found us missing.
{18681}{18737}As far as I'm concerned,|that's not an option.
{18738}{18812}All right. Suit yourself.
{18813}{18902}Come on, Grace.|We've got a farm to save.
{18968}{19049}You'll have to excuse her.|She's just a little tense.
{19050}{19143}Tense. What's her specialty,|sour cream?
{19190}{19239}Going to town.
{19240}{19303}Of all the ill-conceived i--
{19391}{19464}Now, don't look at me|so crossly.
{19465}{19501}I know what|you're going to say--
{19502}{19551}that Maggie and Grace|will need someone...
{19552}{19587}with my eye for detail...
{19588}{19687}to keep them|on the straight and narrow.
{19688}{19762}Say no more. I'll go.
{19763}{19834}No mushy|good-byes, my little ones.
{19835}{19927}You know how I get|about overly emotional displays.
{20036}{20142}What made you change your mind?
{20143}{20212}-I'd rather not talk about it.|-It's a chick thing.
{20292}{20330}Good luck, girls!
{20381}{20474}-They're stew meat.|-Hurry back!
{20800}{20870}GRACE, OFF-KEY: # She'll be comin'|'round the mountain #
{20869}{20925}# She'll be comin' 'round the mountain #
{20923}{20974}# She'll be comin' 'round... #
{20966}{21010}She better hurry up|around that mountain...
{21011}{21055}'cause I cannot take this|much longer.
{21056}{21115}Maggie, may I be frank?
{21116}{21188}Only if you let me wear the hat.
{21189}{21289}Lowbrow remarks|may work for you...
{21290}{21369}but we prefer|the gentle approach.
{21370}{21432}Well, she better|stick a sock in it soon.
{21433}{21505}The vultures|are starting to circle.
{21539}{21593}She's not dying!
{21594}{21664}You sure? We could wait around!
{21664}{21738}#... no, nothing, when she sees|Grandma #
{21738}{21788}# No more food for her #
{21795}{21840}We'll keep you posted!
{21841}{21871}False alarm, Clem!
{21872}{21918}Roger dodger, out like the wind!
{21919}{21990}Hey, Maggie, Mrs. C?|How do we find...
{21991}{22039}the sheriff's office|when we get into town?
{22040}{22081}Elementary, my dear Grace.
{22082}{22135}If we find Buck,|we find the sheriff.
{22136}{22213}That horse is a legend|in his own mind.
{22638}{22698}So, you think|you got the drop on me?
{22699}{22731}Well, think again.
{23206}{23289}Jump back! Kiss myself!
{23289}{23383}Buck. Earth to Buck? Buck!
{23384}{23444}It's your move.
{23610}{23656}Ohh...great.
{23697}{23768}You were sleep-fighting again.|Almost threw a shoe.
{23808}{23885}It just--it seems like|all the other horses...
{23886}{23950}are out there fighting bad guys|and takin' names!
{24006}{24063}Who put this here?
{24064}{24119}This ain't no Dodge City...
{24120}{24175}but we get our share|of excitement.
{24215}{24297}Been waitin' a long time|to give you this!
{24298}{24327}Telegram!
{24328}{24405}What you got there?
{24406}{24464}"Got Evil Eye Joe. Stop."
{24465}{24521}"Bringing him today. Stop."
{24522}{24591}"Have money ready. Signed, Rico."
{24628}{24722}Yeah!|Rico caught another one already.
{24723}{24781}Might as well give him|the key to my safe.
{24782}{24835}You hear that, Rusty?|Rico's comin'.
{24836}{24904}Yeah, Rico.|I'm old. I ain't deaf.
{24905}{24943}Wouldn't that be the life?
{24944}{25004}Ridin' with Rico,|cleanin' up the west.
{25005}{25076}Kickin' bad-guy behind!
{25077}{25158}Watch out, sucker!
{25306}{25371}All right, girls.|We're goin' in.
{25372}{25479}Look! There's no fences.
{25480}{25530}What keeps the people|from roaming?
{25531}{25577}They appear to be domesticated.
{25578}{25631}It doesn't feel dangerous|at all.
{25632}{25723}It's perfectly safe.|Quiet as a farm at milkin' time.
{25724}{25762}What was that?
{25763}{25799}It's a gunfight!
{25942}{26015}-Aah! Hit the dirt!|-Who lives like this?
{26016}{26057}What do we do? What do we do?
{26058}{26097}Look,|there's a star on that door!
{26098}{26144}That must be|the sheriff's office.
{26145}{26198}Move, ladies! Move!
{26198}{26275}# Swivel your hips, ooh! Give 'em a|grind #
{26275}{26352}# Shimmy and shake and leave your|troubles be... #
{26464}{26548}Get those cows off the stage!
{26583}{26624}Maybe we came at a bad time.
{26625}{26679}Charge!
{26849}{26956}-How dare you?|-Oh!
{27067}{27107}-Daddy?|-Son!
{27271}{27333}I say!
{27334}{27394}What did I do?
{27508}{27549}That does it!
{27550}{27599}Hoof it on out of here, ladies!
{27600}{27661}-Go on!|-Oh, come back!
{27662}{27720}That was the best dang show|we ever had!
{27721}{27790}You've been on the trail|too long, you old coot.
{27791}{27865}What kind of|sheriff's office is that?
{27867}{27914}Dancing girls, gambling...
{27915}{27965}How does he ever|get any work done?
{27966}{28077}If that's the sheriff's office,|this town rocks.
{28108}{28188}Well, if it isn't|three maids a-milkin'.
{28189}{28284}You girls a little far|from home, aren't ya?
{28284}{28342}Well, if it isn't|the phony express.
{28343}{28415}We want a word with you|about this.
{28455}{28500}-What's that?|-What is that?
{28501}{28577}I believe you left this|on our farm.
{28578}{28641}Wait a minute.
{28642}{28746}The place went bankrupt.|Your farm is history.
{28747}{28794}Don't you heifers get it?
{28795}{28837}Hold on, you two!
{28838}{28867}Give us two more weeks...
{28868}{28928}and we'll have at least|sixty bucks in prize money to--
{28929}{28996}Ah-ah-ah. You got three days|to pay or get on your way.
{28997}{29050}And sixty bucks don't cut it.
{29051}{29108}Looks like you need about...
{29109}{29168}Hmm, I'd say...
{29169}{29234}seven hundred and fifty of 'em.
{29235}{29295}But, Maggie, where are we|gonna get all that money?
{29296}{29394}Well, maybe Maggie|can just pull it out of her ear.
{29395}{29434}Hey, watch it, Caloway.
{30150}{30200}Who is that?
{30368}{30462}Don't you know a hero|when you see one, huh?
{30463}{30496}That's Rico...
{30497}{30573}the best dang bounty hunter|this side of the Pecos.
{30574}{30634}I could guess|from here to tomorrow...
{30635}{30686}but I don't know|how you do it, Rico.
{30687}{30749}Where's my money?
{30749}{30835}Well, all right,|I got it right here for you.
{30836}{30895}Hey, they're giving away|free money!
{30928}{30979}So, who else is out there?
{30980}{31009}The only varmint left...
{31010}{31092}is that low-down,|good-for-nothin' Alameda Slim.
{31093}{31136}Cattle rustler.
{31136}{31223}-What's the bounty?|-$750.
{31224}{31290}I got it!
{31291}{31355}Why don't we go nab|that Alameda Slim...
{31356}{31419}and use the reward money|to save the farm?
{31420}{31488}Oh, that is a sensible idea.
{31489}{31539}I knew you'd love it!
{31539}{31631}Don't they have sarcasm|where you come from?
{31632}{31718}Oh, wake up and smell|the alfalfa! It's perfect!
{31719}{31758}I'm gonna need a fresh horse.
{31788}{31886}Hmm, a horse. A horse.
{31887}{31918}Let me think.
{31919}{32005}I reckon you'd want|a fast horse, huh? Real fast?
{32007}{32063}Course, he'd also have|to be able to go...
{32064}{32151}for days|without food or drink...
{32152}{32251}stealthy,|sure-footed in any terrain...
{32292}{32356}-Look at me!|-What about that horse?
{32357}{32423}What, you mean Buck here?
{32424}{32466}Boy, I don't know.
{32467}{32557}Buck's fast, all right,|but he's kind of a handful.
{32558}{32652}-He'll do.|-Well, suit yourself.
{32709}{32775}Rico's saddle!|I'm wearing Rico's saddle!
{32776}{32817}I'm wearing Rico's saddle!
{32818}{32877}Great. I'll leave you two alone.
{32878}{32925}Ohh, oh, no. No, no, no.
{32926}{32976}There is no way|in heaven or earth...
{32977}{33020}that cows can catch an outlaw.
{33021}{33065}Look, all we've got to do...
{33066}{33152}is follow this chuck wagon|to a cattle drive.
{33154}{33217}And then, you see...
{33218}{33265}we let the bad guys come to us.
{33266}{33330}We've|no reason to believe...
{33331}{33403}this chuck wagon is heading off|to a cattle drive.
{33404}{33478}Hey, Tommy!|Have fun on that cattle drive!
{33479}{33529}All right, then.
{33531}{33606}I think it is|headed toward a cattle drive.
{33607}{33708}We are not following|this wagon, and that is final.
{33709}{33793}Come on, Caloway. It'll be fun!
{33794}{33863}-Did you just hit me?|-Kinda.
{33864}{33922}-Well, stop it.|-Why?
{33918}{33949}Because I don't like it.
{34225}{34276}Oh, no. Not the hat.
{34277}{34310}What? What about the--
{34481}{34511}All right, all right...
{34512}{34579}violence is not going|to solve anything.
{34580}{34660}Why don't we all take|a deep cleansing breath--
{34758}{34826}Hey, now! Mud wrestling!
{34996}{35058}What in tarnation?
{35059}{35095}Maggie, for the last time...
{35096}{35169}I will not be roped|into this scheme.
{35170}{35256}Come on, you crazy heifers!
{35256}{35305}Come on!
{35306}{35385}Hey, partner,|curb your livestock.
{35386}{35424}This town is clean!
{35539}{35618}Not exactly what I had in mind,|but this'll work.
{35619}{35681}Well, it doesn't work for me!
{35682}{35761}Adios, Buck.|Take care of Rico now.
{35810}{35890}Hasta la vista, heifers!
{35864}{35954}GRACE, OFF-KEY: # Oh, give me a|home #
{35954}{36025}GRACE, OFF-KEY: # Oh, give me a|home #
{36025}{36106}# Where the buffalo roam #
{36106}{36275}# And the deer... ahem... and the|antelope pla-a-ay #
{36275}{36349}# Where seldom is heard #
{36349}{36443}# A discouraging word #
{36443}{36536}# And the skies are not cloudy all day #
{36536}{36579}[Mooing]
{36579}{36650}# Home, home on the range #
{36720}{36772}-Sold!|-What was that?
{36773}{36839}It's a farm auction, ladies.
{36840}{36882}And that's the last|of the furniture.
{36883}{36916}The final item|to be auctioned...
{36917}{36958}is this piece|of real property...
{36959}{37039}known heretofore|as the Dixon farm.
{37039}{37128}Do I hear 425? 425!|Do I hear 450? 450?
{37129}{37203}What's going to happen|to the cow who lived there?
{37205}{37233}She'll be OK.
{37234}{37301}-How do you know?|-You're lookin' at her.
{37302}{37387}This was your farm?
{37388}{37483}We had, like, a family, too,|you know.
{37484}{37570}-What happened?|-Alameda Slim happened.
{37748}{37825}Sold to Mr. Yancy O'Del!
{37826}{37877}Pleasure|doing business with you.
{38261}{38307}Cattle drive. Told ya.
{38308}{38343}You both owe me a dollar.
{38344}{38376}Step lightly, girls.
{38377}{38454}The male of the species|can be extremely hostile.
{38455}{38496}Oh, come on, Caloway.
{38498}{38557}It's not like they haven't|seen a cow before.
{38673}{38741}-What? Huh?|-Check it out.
{38742}{38811}Ooh, dairy cows!
{38851}{38894}Oh, hey, how's it going?
{38895}{38994}Oh, hello. Let me guess.|You're a Taurus.
{38996}{39081}Look, just keep moving|and avoid eye contact.
{39128}{39211}Pardon me, but what are|three lovely ladies like you...
{39212}{39272}doing on a drive like this?
{39273}{39338}Just ignore them,|and perhaps they'll go away.
{39339}{39420}They seem like nice guys.|Maybe they can help us.
{39421}{39469}Sure we can help you.
{39470}{39528}Maybe we can help each other.
{39582}{39678}Look, lover-bull,|we're here strictly on business.
{39679}{39768}Sounds pretty exciting.|What kind of business?
{39769}{39857}We're looking for a cattle|rustler named Alameda Slim.
{39887}{39928}It doesn't hurt to ask.
{39973}{40046}Slim's just|a scary bedtime story...
{40047}{40091}to get little calves to behave.
{40222}{40249}What was that?
{40250}{40291}It must be Slim and the Willies.
{40292}{40329}Slim and the Willies?
{40330}{40399}Don't worry, darlin'.|I'll protect you.
{40400}{40475}You have exactly two seconds|to remove your hoof...
{40476}{40521}before I snap it off|at the knee.
{40522}{40595}Oh, uh, sorry, ma'am.|I thought you were the blonde.
{40709}{40765}Come on, girls.|It's time to lose these ropes.
{40766}{40838}Where you going?
{40839}{40908}-Maggie, I'm stuck.|-Look out!
{41102}{41162}It's payback time.
{41163}{41213}-Cover me!|-With what?
{41214}{41243}-Howdy, Slim.|-Howdy, Slim.
{41244}{41311}Quiet, you fools.|We've got work to do.
{41312}{41363}Now listen up.
{41363}{41416}# There are crooks in this here west #
{41416}{41472}# Who have claimed to be the best #
{41472}{41540}# And they think they wrote the book on|how to rustle #
{41540}{41562}- Aah! - Aah!
{41562}{41608}# Well, as good as they may be #
{41608}{41657}# Not a one's as good as me #
{41657}{41749}# And I barely have to move a single|muscle #
{41749}{41817}# They call me mean, boys #
{41817}{41860}# Depraved and nasty, too #
{41860}{41920}# And they ain't seen, boys #
{41920}{41962}# The cruelest thing I do #
{41963}{41993}[Moos]
{41993}{42121}# You see I yodel-adle-eedle-idle-odle #
{42121}{42206}# The sweetest way of rustlin' yet|devised #
{42206}{42315}# 'Cause when I|yodel-adle-eedle-idle-odle #
{42315}{42420}# Why, looky, how them cows get|hypnotized #
{42420}{42469}# He don't prod, he don't yell #
{42469}{42511}# Still he drives them dogies well #
{42511}{42580}# Which ain't easy when your chaps are|labeled #
{42580}{42623}# X-X-X-X-L #
{42624}{42700}# Yes, if yer lookin' from a bovine point|of view #
{42700}{42772}# I sure can yodel-adle-eedle-idle #
{42772}{42826}# Yodel-adle-eedle-idle #
{42826}{42935}# Yodel-adle-eedle-idle-oo #
{42935}{43068}Here we go, boys! 5,000 cattle in the|side pocket!
{43068}{43126}[Yodeling William Tell Overture]
{43266}{43316}[Yodeling Yankee Doodle]
{43477}{43525}[Yodeling Beethoven's Ode to Joy]
{43725}{43760}# Ooh #
{43761}{43867}Maggie! Mrs. Caloway! Snap out of it!
{43867}{43952}# A sound that cattle truly take to heart|#
{43952}{43994}# Yeah, I can yodel-adle-eedle-idle #
{43994}{44055}# Yodel-adle-eedle-idel-odle #
{44055}{44145}# And smack my big old rump if that|ain't art #
{44145}{44202}# He don't rope, not a chance #
{44202}{44242}# He just puts 'em in a trance #
{44242}{44335}# He's a pioneer pied piper in ten-gallon|underpants #
{44335}{44386}# Yep, I'm the real rip-roarin' deal #
{44386}{44431}# To those who moo #
{44431}{44506}# Thanks to my yodel-adle-eedle-idle #
{44506}{44564}# Yodel-adle-eedle-idle #
{44564}{44640}# I got cattle out the old wazoo, heh|heh! #
{44640}{44756}# 'Cause I can yodel-adle-eedle-idle-oo #
{44756}{44831}# Yodel-adle-eedle-idle-oo #
{42936}{43072}Here we go, boys!|5,000 cattle in the side pocket!
{43749}{43850}Maggie! Mrs. Caloway!|Snap out of it!
{45266}{45327}Rico, if you'd just been|a second earlier...
{45328}{45376}you'd have had that rustler|dead to rights.
{45377}{45451}You boys see anything|before I got here?
{45451}{45489}Yeah, we sure did there, Rico.
{45490}{45531}We were just|settin' down to supper...
{45532}{45621}when all of a sudden|the lights went out.
{45622}{45723}All right, what part of|"cover me" didn't we understand?
{45724}{45774}-You guys OK?|-I don't know.
{45775}{45818}I feel like I was dreaming.
{45819}{45876}Yeah. Slim started singing...
{45877}{45942}and all of a sudden|I lost track of everything.
{45943}{46010}Singing? That didn't sound|like singing to me.
{46011}{46062}And, you know,|I have perfect pitch.
{46063}{46142}Uh, yes. Grace,|about your perfect pitch--
{46143}{46210}-Not now, Maggie.|-All right, show's over!
{46252}{46321}You're interfering|with official police bidness!
{46322}{46384}Be right with you, big guy.
{46385}{46467}Buck is on the case.|You know.
{46467}{46558}Don't embarrass me|in front of my partner. Please!
{46559}{46620}You and he are partners?
{46621}{46703}How does that work exactly?
{46704}{46777}Do you get to ride him|on odd days or even?
{46778}{46833}He chose me specifically...
{46834}{46888}because I have skills|that are essential...
{46889}{46937}to capturing our quarry.
{47243}{47293}You boys headed back to town?
{47294}{47366}Yes, sir. We got to go file|a report with the sheriff.
{47367}{47402}Give him back his horse.
{47403}{47473}This one's too skittish|around cows.
{47474}{47567}And that, girls,|is what makes me and Rico...
{47568}{47675}equal parts of|one lean mean crime-fighting--
{47772}{47820}machine?
{47862}{47937}Well, there it is, then.
{47938}{48038}Well, well, well, stud.
{48039}{48069}Now, I'm no professional...
{48070}{48169}but I'd say the only|mano a mano you'll be doing...
{48170}{48209}is in your dreams.
{48210}{48250}Oh, look out, Buck.
{48251}{48323}He's making a move|on your left flank. Kaboosh!
{48324}{48393}Maggie! Grace!|Leave that poor animal alone.
{48438}{48527}Buck,|I realize you're very upset...
{48528}{48575}but if you'd like|to join our group...
{48575}{48664}and help us bring in Slim,|we'd be happy to have you.
{48665}{48727}However, there are a few...
{48728}{48811}anger-management issues|we need to discuss.
{48812}{48871}I wouldn't help|you bossy bovines...
{48872}{48921}if my life depended on it!
{48922}{48973}You see, that's just|what I'm talking about.
{49041}{49067}Come on, girls.
{49068}{49104}Let's go get Slim.
{49105}{49169}"Come on, girls,|let's go get Slim."
{49170}{49220}Cud-chewing heifers.
{49221}{49308}I can catch that Slim with|one hoof tied behind my back.
{49309}{49391}Wait a minute. Why don't l?
{49392}{49490}Yes! Partner or no partner,|that's what I'm-a do. Hey!
{49536}{49588}Hold the horse now.
{49647}{49691}Forget it.
{49692}{49737}Definitely bipolar.
{49738}{49797}Move it, sister!|Hero passing on the left!
{49797}{49872}-Hey, watch it.|-Where are you going, hotfoot?
{49873}{49902}I'm gonna go nab that rustler...
{49903}{49965}and show Rico|I got what it takes...
{49966}{50054}so say good-bye to your farm,|girls, because Slim is mine.
{50055}{50094}It's hero time!
{50095}{50149}Watch out now! Hey! Get back!
{50150}{50199}Jump back! Kiss myself!
{50229}{50290}Oh, this is|a fine kettle of fish.
{50291}{50343}How can we compete with that?
{50344}{50384}Look at the bright side, Mrs. C.
{50385}{50460}Don't forget about|our secret weapon.
{50461}{50496}Secret weapon?
{50497}{50562}Who better to catch|a cattle thief than a cow?
{50563}{50656}Yeah, even you can't argue|with that kind of logic.
{50657}{50699}OK, maybe you can.
{50700}{50728}You know, Grace...
{50729}{50805}Maggie does so love|your singing.
{50806}{50834}How about a song?
{50835}{50876}I'm gonna get you for this.
{51012}{51104}5,000 Texas longhorns.
{51105}{51171}Not bad for one night's work.
{51172}{51223}Pick a color.
{51224}{51300}I said,|not bad for one night's work.
{51301}{51352}-What?|-Thank you.
{51353}{51426}And judging by the ear mark...
{51427}{51529}I'd say these are the last|of Big Mike Donald's herd.
{51530}{51581}Big Mike Donald had a farm?
{51669}{51760}That's right. He had a farm.
{51761}{51804}Now that all his cash cows|have disappeared...
{51805}{51858}that poor sap's|gonna be flat broke.
{51859}{51928}Perfect time for a certain|upstanding land owner...
{51929}{51987}to step in|and take all the land.
{51988}{52027}Who are you?
{52028}{52085}What did you do|with Uncle Slim?
{52086}{52160}Put up your dukes,|Mr. Fancy Britches.
{52193}{52239}It's me. Hello?
{52240}{52287}This here|is the disguise I use...
{52288}{52332}to sneak into|all them auctions...
{52333}{52419}and buy all the land,|you brainless monotone monkeys.
{52420}{52520}Shoot, you got to be the richest|land baron in the west.
{52521}{52598}Yes, but the part|that really warms my heart...
{52599}{52663}is watching those homesteaders|suffer.
{52729}{52760}Back in the day, I worked...
{52761}{52831}the highfalutinest ranches|you ever seen...
{52832}{52941}but those stuck-up ranch bosses|couldn't appreciate my talents.
{52941}{52998}Maybe they just didn't like|your singing.
{53121}{53196}Songbirds sing.
{53197}{53250}Saloon gals sing.
{53251}{53349}Little bitty snot-nosed|children sing.
{53350}{53402}I yodel!
{53403}{53459}And yodeling is an art!
{53459}{53536}Well, maybe they just|didn't like your yodeling.
{53611}{53671}He didn't mean it, Uncle Slim.
{53672}{53710}Everybody likes yodeling.
{53758}{53901}It's one of the funniest,|cornball, goofy, silly sounds...
{53902}{53937}in the whole west.
{54153}{54229}Am I correct in assuming|that each and every time...
{54230}{54302}we brought a herd back|to this secret lair...
{54303}{54389}you've managed to sit|in the exact same spot...
{54390}{54488}blocking that choice|piece of property from my view?!
{54489}{54584}This is my comfy place.
{54660}{54711}It's called|Patch of Heaven, Uncle Slim.
{54712}{54778}Goes on auction|Thursday morning.
{54779}{54827}Perfect. Pencil it in.
{54828}{54907}Thursday morning--right after|we sell off this herd.
{54908}{54974}But it's just|a little old dirt farm.
{54975}{55010}Ah, what's the difference?
{55011}{55180}When you're talking revenge,|every last acre counts.
{55582}{55612}I don't get it.
{55613}{55666}Weren't the cows|supposed to come back?
{55668}{55736}Daddy, what's going to happen|if they don't come back?
{55737}{55801}Oh, but they are coming back.
{55802}{55879}Hogwash! We all know|they're never coming back.
{55914}{56013}You don't know that, Jeb.
{56014}{56054}Everybody knows that bovines...
{56054}{56140}are the most intelligent,|crafty animals in the west.
{56141}{56173}Yeah. He's right, you know.
{56173}{56240}It doesn't take a cow|to figure out...
{56241}{56287}they saw|the writing on the wall...
{56288}{56336}and flown the coop|while the getting was good.
{56337}{56357}Who are?
{56358}{56434}Oh, no!|They tricked us and deserted us!
{56435}{56476}No, no. Aud-Audrey.
{56508}{56573}Excuse me. Excuse me.
{56574}{56655}Excuse me!
{56721}{56827}Let's not forget|who we're talkin' 'bout.
{56828}{56904}Audrey, remember when|Grace helped you figure out...
{56905}{56964}why you crossed the road?
{56965}{57055}And, Jeb, Miss Caloway|knew just what to do...
{57056}{57109}when your head got stuck|in that spittoon.
{57110}{57138}Get off my case!
{57139}{57214}And Maggie|was gonna make us all winners.
{57215}{57285}I truly believe|there ain't nothin'...
{57286}{57346}those three cows can't do.
{57560}{57658}Well, whatever they're gonna do,|they better do it soon.
{57659}{57764}I'm so very sorry, Pearl.
{57765}{57851}It's a real shame. It is.
{58013}{58063}Ollie,|I don't know what's worse--
{58064}{58135}losing my farm|to the highest bidder...
{58136}{58274}or knowing that--that my girls|are lost and alone out there.
{58368}{58429}Come on, girls.
{58430}{58489}Either|I'm getting good at this...
{58490}{58527}or his scent|is getting stronger.
{58528}{58593}Go get him, Maggie.|Look out, Slim!
{58594}{58679}-No. It can't be.|-We're on your trail!
{59243}{59299}This has Buck|written all over it.
{59300}{59370}We're not gonna let|this dumb old trick stop us.
{59371}{59468}Sooner or later, all these paths|will hook up, and then...
{59504}{59568}Oh, no, the tracks!
{59569}{59611}Hurry up, girls.|Don't lose that trail.
{59612}{59688}What trail?|I can't see anything.
{59727}{59774}Look out!
{59821}{59889}Flash flood!
{59890}{59941}Get to high ground!
{61257}{61373}No! Come on, girls,|we can't give up!
{61374}{61461}Maggie, that's enough.|The minute this lets up...
{61463}{61538}we're heading straight home|to Patch of Heaven.
{61539}{61612}But what about catching Slim|and collecting the reward?
{61613}{61647}We never had a prayer...
{61648}{61683}of catching Slim|in the first place.
{61684}{61724}This whole ridiculous plan...
{61725}{61829}is just so you can get revenge|on those cattle rustlers.
{61830}{61912}For your information, duchess...
{61913}{61995}this whole ridiculous plan|is about us saving our farm.
{61996}{62058}Our farm might've had|a fighting chance...
{62059}{62090}until you came along.
{62091}{62134}What's that supposed to mean?
{62135}{62221}Strutting around with|your vulgar show-cow behavior.
{62222}{62252}I was just having--
{62253}{62318}Wasting our time|on your foolish plans.
{62319}{62363}Through the years,|Patch of Heaven...
{62364}{62430}has survived every hardship|that nature can dish out...
{62431}{62459}but you, Maggie...
{62460}{62557}are the biggest catastrophe|to ever hit our farm.
{62558}{62609}Well, if that's the way|you feel about it...
{62610}{62668}maybe we should just go|our separate ways.
{62669}{62721}Now, that's the first|good idea you've ever had.
{62722}{62752}-Fine!|-Fine!
{62753}{62808}-Fine!|-Fine!
{63020}{63111}Yeah. Fine.
{63112}{63156}It's not like your farm...
{63157}{63231}was ever gonna feel like home|to me anyways.
{63604}{63653}BONNIE RAITT: # Rain is pourin' down #
{63655}{63737}# Like the heavens are hurtin' #
{63737}{63898}# Seems like it's been dark since the|devil knows when #
{63898}{64034}# How do you go on never knowing for|certain #
{64039}{64175}# Will the sun ever shine again? #
{64175}{64314}# Feels like it's been years since it|started to thunder #
{64314}{64458}# Clouds are campin' out in the valley|and glen #
{64458}{64611}# How do you go on when you can't|help but wonder #
{64611}{64732}# Will the sun ever shine again? #
{64732}{64863}# What if the rain keeps fallin'? #
{64863}{65001}# What if the sky stays gray? #
{65001}{65163}# What if the winds keep squallin' #
{65163}{65294}# And never go away? #
{65294}{65420}# Maybe soon the storm will be tired of|blowin' #
{65420}{65535}# Maybe soon it all will be over, amen #
{65535}{65686}# How do you go on if there's no way of|knowin'? #
{65684}{65781}# Will the sun ever shine? #
{65781}{65818}# Wish I could say #
{65818}{65844}[Neighs]
{65844}{65908}# Send me a sign #
{65907}{65982}# One little ray #
{65981}{66053}# Lord, if you're listenin' #
{66052}{66176}# How long until then? #
{66206}{66300}# Will the sun ever shine #
{66300}{66479}# Again? #
{67263}{67313}-Wake up.|-Check, please!
{67564}{67618}It tasted a lot better|in my sleep.
{67619}{67697}Well, I suppose|you'll be off now.
{67698}{67768}Where will you go?
{67769}{67833}Oh, probably check out|the Grand Canyon.
{67834}{67882}See Utah before I die.
{67883}{67938}Wait a minute. Where's Grace?
{67939}{68009}Hi, there.|Boy, am I glad you guys are up.
{68010}{68054}Hey, come look at this.
{68055}{68131}What on earth?|Where did all this come from?
{68132}{68237}Hey, it's green, it's leafy,|and it's free. Shut up and eat.
{68238}{68278}Good morning, ladies.
{68279}{68320}I see you're already|tucked into your appetizer.
{68321}{68378}Never knew a pretty lady|that didn't have an appetite.
{68379}{68428}Oh, now, see here, you ruffian--
{68429}{68489}He's not a ruffian,|Mrs. Caloway.
{68490}{68603}He's a genuine desert shaman--|our very own wise man.
{68604}{68666}Shaman, chef, chief cook,|and bottle washer.
{68667}{68739}I'm a jackrabbit of all trades|and at your service.
{68740}{68802}Folks around these parts|call me Lucky Jack.
{68803}{68867}Yep, they used to come|from miles around...
{68868}{68936}just to get one rub|of my lucky rabbit's foot.
{69084}{69149}This happens all the time.|Now, where was l?
{69214}{69264}Now let me just|get this on the fire...
{69265}{69323}and it'll be ready directly.
{69391}{69439}We don't eat meat.
{69440}{69491}It's kind of like|a professional courtesy.
{69492}{69549}Perhaps we'll dine with you|some other time.
{69550}{69611}You see, Grace and l|are returning to our farm...
{69612}{69661}to say our last good-byes.
{69662}{69733}Yeah. We need closure.
{69734}{69787}I can sympathize there,|sister, I truly can.
{69788}{69844}Until recently,|I, too, had a home.
{69845}{69887}Echo Mine it was called.
{69888}{70001}Us jackrabbits lived there|for generation after generation.
{70002}{70098}Till some land-grabbing bandit|moved in...
{70099}{70198}and flushed us out|like yesterday's oatmeal.
{70200}{70307}Excuse us. My good fellow,|we must be on our way.
{70308}{70355}Wait! There he is!
{70508}{70586}Slim! You mean|this no-good varmint...
{70587}{70658}is hiding out in Echo Mine|right now?
{70659}{70728}-Without a doubt.|-Maggie, what are you thinking?
{70729}{70823}Look, I got a score to settle|with that rhinestone fat boy...
{70824}{70854}and nothing to lose.
{70855}{70927}But it'll be dangerous going|after Slim all by yourself.
{70928}{70993}Hey, I got the rabbit.
{70994}{71092}That's not all you got, Maggie.|You got us.
{71156}{71221}We are sticking to our plan|and going home.
{71222}{71276}Hold on, you two.
{71277}{71387}As strange as this sounds,|Grace is actually making sense.
{71388}{71443}-Thank you.|-You want the money...
{71444}{71492}and I want to get even|with Slim.
{71493}{71546}The three of us go together,|and we're sure to get him.
{71547}{71642}Once you collect the reward,|I'll walk out your front gate...
{71643}{71726}and I'll stay out of it forever.|Deal?
{71760}{71884}Your powers of persuasion|are uncanny. Deal.
{71885}{71974}Ha! Bovine bounty hunters!|Now I've seen everything.
{71975}{71976}Let's get moving, ladies.
{71976}{72021}Let's get moving, ladies.
{72022}{72148}Time for an underground|smackdown.|Yee-haw!
{72148}{72250}# Out in the land where the heroes meet|their makers #
{72249}{72355}# Out in the land where the hale and|hearty fall #
{72354}{72402}# Out where the fearless get the|shudders #
{72402}{72455}# Justice is here, and it's wearing|udders #
{72455}{72516}# Yee-haw! The cows are walkin' tall #
{72516}{72549}# Home, home, this ain't it, pal #
{72549}{72595}# Home, home, home on the range #
{72595}{72654}# Home, home, better go git, pal #
{72654}{72727}# Home, home, home on the range #
{72735}{72839}OK, boys, let's go|through it one last time.
{72840}{72902}-Who am l?|-Uncle Slim?
{72903}{72952}Correct!
{72953}{73016}I put on my hat...
{73017}{73091}then I put on my spectacles--
{73092}{73168}-Who're you?|-Where's Uncle Slim?
{73169}{73252}It's still me!
{73253}{73306}Can't you stupid|sack of hammers get it right?
{73336}{73407}The ever-punctual|Mr. Weaseley.
{73408}{73480}OK, everybody make way...
{73481}{73546}for the big man|in black market livestock.
{73784}{73823}Hey, who're you?
{73824}{73872}All right, come on!
{73873}{73934}Move it, Bessie, or|I'll tan your hides right here.
{73935}{74007}Watch the suit! Watch the suit!
{74008}{74038}Feast your eyes.
{74039}{74144}5,000 cows on the barrelhead|as promised, Mr. Weaseley.
{74144}{74195}The name's Wesley.
{74196}{74248}So, Slim, what do you say|we get a move on...
{74249}{74321}and load these cash cows|onto the train A.S.A.P., huh?
{74322}{74350}Let's go.
{74351}{74473}Yes, yes, of course. Just as|soon as I finish counting.
{74601}{74661}Lucky Jack, you did it!|We're here!
{74662}{74723}Well,|I take my hat off to you, Jack.
{74724}{74766}But you've got us here|in one piece.
{74767}{74808}Well, seein' is believin'.
{74809}{74861}And I don't believe what I see.
{74862}{74892}Oh, it's Buck!
{74893}{74943}Stallion of the Cim-moron.
{74943}{74979}I'm supposed to be here|just in case...
{74980}{75007}one of the horses get tired.
{75007}{75038}Cows only.
{75039}{75107}Look, friend, you don't|understand my situation.
{75108}{75187}No, you don't understand...
{75188}{75240}so I'll say it again.
{75241}{75327}The only critters|that get by me are cows.
{75328}{75388}Cows only.
{75389}{75467}Come on!|Cut me a break.
{75468}{75499}Now what?
{75500}{75549}What are you doing here?
{75550}{75628}Sorry we're late.|We got separated from the herd.
{75629}{75678}Right this way, little lady.
{75679}{75721}Tell 'em Junior sent you.
{75797}{75883}-Nice hat, ma'am.|-Cheeky devil.
{75884}{75963}Excuse me, reject.|Coming through.
{75964}{76029}Hey, what gives?!
{76030}{76072}How come|they got to go through?
{76073}{76112}They're cows.
{76113}{76161}What?!|But what about the rabbit?
{76162}{76234}Well, obviously,|he was with the cows.
{76235}{76291}I'm with the cows, too!
{76292}{76371}Yeah! Hey! Hey, cows! W-wait up!
{76372}{76423}You got to tell this guy|you know me!
{76424}{76459}See, Junior, we're old friends!
{76460}{76563}Come on, Margie! Uh, Gretchen!|Miss, uh--uh, Hat Cow!
{76564}{76630}Come on,|it's your old pal Buck, see?
{76735}{76772}Nah, doesn't ring a bell.
{76773}{76839}No, no, no, wait!|Hey, come back! No!
{76840}{76907}Hang on--hang on a second.
{76908}{76959}They're just kidding.|You see, if you could--
{77055}{77105}Don't make me hurt you.
{77270}{77368}I gotta go, but let's throw on|the old feedbag sometime.
{77369}{77454}Stay cool.|It's hero time.
{77514}{77553}So what's the plan?
{77554}{77601}Well, let's see...
{77602}{77660}You two get his attention|while I sneak up behind him...
{77661}{77701}and then|I'll knock him into the cart...
{77702}{77764}and then we'll rope him up|and wheel him to justice!
{77765}{77802}And for extra measure...
{77803}{77865}how about we conk him|on the noggin with this?
{77866}{77922}You go, cowgirl!|That's usin' the old hat.
{77923}{77987}You lost me here, missy.
{77988}{78037}It's simple.
{78037}{78132}Cart, smack, rope, roll,|justice. Come on, Jack, focus.
{78133}{78219}Now is not the time to get|all scatterbrained and flaky.
{78352}{78411}Good, I'm not too late.
{78412}{78468}Sorry. Still stakin' out|your quarry, huh?
{78469}{78505}Yeah, pretty much. Why?
{78506}{78605}Listen, I came to warn you, one|equine to another, about Rico.
{78601}{78643}As soon as he nabs|that rustler...
{78644}{78693}he's gonna be in a big hurry|to collect that reward.
{78689}{78727}-So?|-So?!
{78728}{78802}Once he catches his man, that's|when the horsewhip comes out...
{78802}{78842}and he's not shy|about using it, either!
{78838}{78875}-Horsewhip?|-Horsewhip!
{78876}{78930}And not only are you|gonna be carrying Rico...
{78931}{78963}but that rustler as well.
{78964}{79004}Have you seen that guy?|He's huge!
{79005}{79033}What should I do?
{79034}{79064}-Run!|-OK.
{79060}{79103}Yeah, run like the wind,|partner, and save yourself!
{79104}{79132}I'm going!
{79134}{79201}Go on, take off! Fade!|Ride into the sunset!
{79202}{79260}-All righty, I'm outta here!|-Scram!
{79261}{79304}OK, thanks, buddy!|I owe you one!
{79305}{79344}Godspeed, my friend!
{79345}{79397}So long, sucker!
{79398}{79474}He must be takin' stupid lessons|from that buffalo.
{79526}{79603}-1,420...|-4,334...
{79604}{79657}1,440...
{79658}{79746}-4,335...|-1,435...
{79747}{79826}-1...|-4,336...
{79827}{79887}-Ohh!|-4,337...
{79888}{79934}Can't you morons|count to yourselves?
{79935}{79963}Come on.
{79964}{80001}Gotta start all over!
{80002}{80064}-There he is.|-Come on, let's go!
{80064}{80099}Hold on!
{80100}{80167}You're both forgetting|Slim's hypnotic control...
{80168}{80219}over those|with less than perfect pitch.
{80220}{80259}Jack, I hope you can forgive me.
{80260}{80317}-For what, missy? Aah!|-For that.
{80318}{80344}Now, you watch it there, toots!
{80388}{80451}Grace, how practical!
{80452}{80494}Done countin'!
{80495}{80587}-What do we got?|-4,997.
{80588}{80644}-What?|-Huh? Wait, wait, what?
{80645}{80692}I thought you said 5,000 even.
{80693}{80773}Of course I did. Gil must've|just miscounted, that's all.
{80805}{80868}There's one up there!
{80869}{80921}The others can't be far behind.
{80922}{80964}Just you watch.
{80965}{81051}You're gonna like this.|Yodeling's an art.
{81506}{81594}What's the deal, Slimbo?
{81595}{81660}Maybe she wasn't an art lover.
{81661}{81689}Philistine!
{81690}{81753}Shut up, you greenhorns!
{81754}{81841}A bovine ain't been born|that can resist my charms.
{82096}{82148}Watch your back, Uncle Slim!
{82149}{82250}Got you!|Where do you think you're going?
{82338}{82378}-Now, Jack!|-OK!
{82379}{82445}What in the rootin'-tootin'|blazes is goin' on here?!
{82519}{82577}Uncle Slim! Uncle Slim!
{82578}{82632}Let's get outta here!
{82657}{82700}Come back here, dog meat!
{82701}{82744}-Jackpot!|-We got him now!
{82745}{82791}-Well done!|-Watch out!
{82787}{82845}It's Buck!
{82846}{82883}Hey, Casey Jones...
{82884}{82941}grab the bills|and fire up the getaway express!
{83103}{83163}I gave up clown college|for this?
{83258}{83343}It's Slim! I got Slim!|Rico's gonna be so proud of me!
{83344}{83410}Thank you!
{83411}{83470}Leave me alone!
{83751}{83821}-Sorry.|-Uncle Slim! Uncle Slim!
{83822}{83886}Quick, girls, in here!
{84124}{84178}That was Rico!
{84234}{84290}What in blue blazes?
{84430}{84481}I'll knock you|into next Tuesday!
{84482}{84524}Come back here!
{84525}{84566}You're going down!
{84733}{84818}-Get this off of me!|-Uncle Slim! Uncle Slim!
{84858}{84943}Rico's saddle!|I'm wearing Rico's saddle!
{85226}{85258}Surprise!
{85901}{85959}We made it, girls!|We made it!
{86026}{86072}Ladies, we got company!
{86240}{86305}Whoa! Stop! Stop! Hit the brake!
{86307}{86351}Look out!
{86819}{86922}I guess I gotta do everything|around here myself!
{87026}{87131}Call me crazy, but I think|these cows got it in for me.
{87132}{87191}Maybe they just don't like|your singing.
{87192}{87237}Shut up!
{87238}{87326}Mr. Weaseley,|my money, if you please.
{87328}{87398}I was just|keeping it safe for you, Slim.
{87398}{87427}Sure you were.
{87428}{87516}Protecting my investments|is what I pay this fellow for.
{87517}{87562}Mr. Weaseley, let me present...
{87563}{87645}the most traitorous,|double-crossin' gun for hire...
{87646}{87754}that I've ever had the pleasure|to call partner--Rico.
{87755}{87814}You're too kind, boss.
{87815}{87862}No, it can't be.
{87863}{87940}His reputation as|a bounty hunter is well-known...
{87941}{88012}but lately he's been doing|a little moonlighting...
{88013}{88060}and covering my tracks.
{88061}{88127}Rico's going to see you|to the border...
{88128}{88217}so that nothing else goes wrong.
{88271}{88337}Now, if you'll all pardon me...
{88338}{88393}there's|a little Patch of Heaven...
{88394}{88444}on the auction block|this morning.
{88445}{88536}He's going to buy our farm!
{88630}{88694}I don't know|how you got here, skittish...
{88695}{88747}but stick with me,|and you may get to like...
{88748}{88805}the other side of the law.
{88806}{88864}Get on there!
{88865}{88903}All right, come on! Come on!
{88904}{88962}Move it, Bessie! Get in there!
{88963}{89009}Hurry up!|You don't want to be late...
{89010}{89045}for that big round-up|in the sky!
{89255}{89351}Get in there!|Come on, you stupid cows!
{89352}{89383}Come on!
{89451}{89505}Lovely.|Now get the engine fired up...
{89506}{89541}and let's make tracks.
{89628}{89691}Make a break for it,|ladies! Run!
{89757}{89809}Buck, have you gone crazy?!
{89810}{89886}That's entirely possible!
{89887}{89998}Or maybe I just figured out|who the real heroes are!
{89999}{90064}Wait! What if this is|some kind of trick?
{90123}{90227}This isn't a trick!|It's a miracle! Come on!
{90266}{90326}So you think|you got the drop on me...
{90326}{90376}well, think again!
{90615}{90649}This is useless.
{90650}{90738}Let's put our heads together.|More brains and less brawn.
{90739}{90777}All right!
{90922}{91028}OK, Caloway, fetch!
{91442}{91495}Lucky shot!
{91496}{91563}Mother of mercy.|Is this the end of Rico?
{91726}{91782}Bravo! You stopped Rico cold!
{91783}{91841}T'weren't nothin'.
{91842}{91902}Fat lot of good it done us.
{91903}{91981}Alameda Slim|has already flown the coop.
{91982}{92014}She's right.
{92015}{92103}Unless we sprout wings, we'll|never make it back in time.
{92104}{92148}I can't believe|what I'm hearing.
{92149}{92229}This train|goes right by Patch of Heaven.
{92230}{92287}What is in the cud|you've been chewin'?
{92288}{92358}How are we supposed|to drive that thing?
{92359}{92449}How? How? I'll tell you how!
{92450}{92534}The same way we walked off|the farm into the unknown.
{92534}{92624}The same way we fought off|those burly barmaids.
{92625}{92726}And the same way we braved|the western wilderness...
{92727}{92800}without the benefit|of food or water.
{92801}{92926}We caught Slim once,|and we shall do it again!
{92927}{92962}Who's with me?
{93017}{93125}Get out of here, you bulls!|Head for the hills!
{93376}{93433}-Let's get it on!|-Cows rule!
{93434}{93491}Howdy, darlin'! Down here!
{93492}{93568}Yeah! Look--look down!|Hello there!
{93569}{93597}Oh, no!
{93598}{93709}I got two words for you guys--|cold shower!
{93710}{93761}We don't have time|for this nonsense!
{93762}{93797}We have a farm to save!
{93798}{93881}-Well, maybe we can help you.|-Maybe we can help each--
{93882}{93951}Other!
{93952}{94011}Bye!|Come up and see us sometime!
{94281}{94368}Oh, no!|It's the Morning Express!
{94370}{94406}There's a switch up ahead!
{94407}{94472}Way ahead of you, pops!|Hop on!
{94473}{94551}-Come on, mule!|-Let's ride!
{95101}{95151}Roadhogs!
{95210}{95264}See you back at the farm, girls!
{95265}{95297}Good luck!
{95298}{95347}This happens all the time.
{95348}{95351}Sold!|All property and livestock...
{95351}{95430}Sold!|All property and livestock...
{95431}{95496}formerly known as|Patch of Heaven...
{95497}{95599}is hereby sold|to Mr. Yancy O'Del.
{95600}{95691}Pleasure doing business|with you.
{95692}{95776}O'Del's the name,|foreclosure's the game.
{95777}{95846}Well,|just set yourself over yonder.
{95847}{95957}Sign this deed,|and the property is all yours.
{95958}{95997}Much obliged, sheriff.
{96159}{96235}-There it is!|-Home and hearth!
{96236}{96318}And a holy hallelujah|of a curve!
{96319}{96368}-Oh, quick, the brakes!|-No time for that!
{96369}{96443}-But won't we jump the tracks?|-We are makin' our own tracks!
{96444}{96480}This is going to be messy!
{96640}{96776}The whole territory|belongs to me. Huh?
{96777}{96819}Five cents for these chicks.
{96820}{96895}Come on, now,|do I hear two cents?
{96895}{96927}-Behind you!|-B-behind you!
{96928}{97010}Whoa! Whoa! Hold your britches!|Come on, now!
{97011}{97061}Run for your lives!
{97146}{97186}Watch yourself!
{97300}{97398}What's the idea of crashing|your train on my property?
{97437}{97487}It can't be!
{97861}{97924}Hold it right there!
{97925}{98005}Piggies, it's time to open up|a can of whoop-hide!
{98156}{98223}Get away from there!
{98437}{98529}You wanna get nuts?|Let's get nuts!
{98871}{98913}It's Alameda Slim!
{98914}{98966}You think you've won?
{98967}{99044}It ain't over|till the fat man sings!
{99417}{99495}Alameda Slim,|you're under arrest.
{99531}{99610}Nobody messes|with Pearl's girls!
{99611}{99669}-Say, girls, got milk?|-Buck!
{99670}{99698}Just kidding.
{99723}{99831}Take him away, boys!|Hope you like stripes.
{99832}{99927}Pearl, your cows can't do much|with Slim's reward money.
{99928}{99972}Think you can find|some use for it?
{99973}{100047}My farm is saved!
{100264}{100306}Where's Maggie?
{100542}{100616}I can't believe she just left.
{100618}{100673}I'm gonna miss her.
{100674}{100714}So shall l, Grace.
{100715}{100782}Her brash manner,|her bullheadedness.
{100783}{100892}She risked her life for us,|and who are we but strangers?
{100893}{101005}We were privileged to know her.|She was a cow like no other!
{101006}{101100}Right down to her appalling|bodily eruptions.
{101131}{101193}-Ahh, that was good!|-Maggie!
{101194}{101253}I was just having|one for the road...
{101254}{101299}when I heard|all the nice stuff...
{101300}{101349}you guys were saying about me.
{101350}{101417}You know, maybe I could|hang around a while.
{101418}{101463}-How about forever?|-Oh!
{101463}{101541}It's your call, Caloway.
{101542}{101613}Is this barnyard big enough|for the both of us?
{101614}{101696}Only if you let me wear the hat.
{101748}{101803}Come on, move your hides, girls.
{101804}{101869}Last one to the barn|sleeps standing up!
{101928}{101932}OK, everyone, big smiles!
{101932}{101979}OK, everyone, big smiles!
{102013}{102067}"So it was that Alameda Slim...
{102068}{102132}"the most notorious|and feared cattle rustler...
{102133}{102251}was apprehended and unmasked|by three unusual dairy cows. "
{102282}{102335}How many times I got to tell you|to wait your turn?
{102336}{102380}How many times|have I got to tell you...
{102381}{102418}to get out of my barrel--
{102461}{102581}It's so nice that Jeb|finally found a friend.
{102582}{102619}Here they come, everybody!
{102904}{102964}Well done!
{102965}{103027}Well, hi ho, ladies!
{103027}{103124}Hey, Barry, three queens,|two kings?
{103125}{103166}Full house.
{103167}{103246}And the joker is wild.
{103400}{103461}K.D. LANG: # Darlin', I swear #
{103461}{103521}# Once you been there #
{103521}{103578}# There ain't a view beneath the blue #
{103578}{103611}# That could ever compare #
{103611}{103649}Hyah! Ho-haa!
{103649}{103702}# The only thing missing #
{103702}{103770}# Is you as my guest #
{103770}{103872}# On a little Patch of Heaven way out|west #
{103872}{103943}# Why don't you come visit? #
{103943}{104035}# There's room in the nest #
{104035}{104074}Yee-haw!
{104074}{104121}# On that little Patch of Heaven #
{104121}{104371}# Way out west #
{104366}{104440}[Cock-a-doodle-doo]