1 00:00:11,611 --> 00:00:13,772 WOMAN ON TV: Day after day... 2 00:00:13,847 --> 00:00:15,815 The store that one might... 3 00:00:17,784 --> 00:00:21,276 I hate television. It gives me headaches. 4 00:00:21,354 --> 00:00:24,653 There's so many magnetic waves traveling in the airspace 5 00:00:24,724 --> 00:00:27,056 because of TV and television, we're losing 6 00:00:27,127 --> 00:00:29,152 10 times as many brain cells as we're supposed to. 7 00:00:29,229 --> 00:00:31,754 Oh, please. 8 00:00:31,831 --> 00:00:34,857 "The cow says blank." 9 00:00:34,934 --> 00:00:37,061 Three letters. 10 00:00:37,137 --> 00:00:38,104 Dude! 11 00:00:38,171 --> 00:00:40,105 "Dude"! 12 00:00:40,173 --> 00:00:43,142 I don't know. Magnetic waves, brain cells. 13 00:00:43,209 --> 00:00:45,575 I don't understand the connection between that stuff. 14 00:00:45,645 --> 00:00:47,408 You know what else I heard? 15 00:00:47,480 --> 00:00:50,745 Magnetic waves shrink silicone molecules. 16 00:00:52,619 --> 00:00:53,677 - Aah! - Aah! 17 00:00:53,753 --> 00:00:55,812 Oh, my God! Turn it off! 18 00:00:55,889 --> 00:00:56,913 It's not working! 19 00:00:56,990 --> 00:00:57,922 It's backwards! 20 00:00:57,991 --> 00:00:59,253 - What do we do? - I don't know! 21 00:00:59,325 --> 00:01:01,259 Oh, my God! 22 00:01:01,327 --> 00:01:03,761 [Television clicks off, both sigh] 23 00:01:03,830 --> 00:01:05,457 That was kind of scary. 24 00:01:05,532 --> 00:01:07,625 - I know something even scarier. - What? 25 00:01:07,700 --> 00:01:09,133 Have you heard about this videotape? 26 00:01:09,202 --> 00:01:11,363 Where they do it on the boat? And then in the car? 27 00:01:11,438 --> 00:01:12,427 And then in the bathtub? 28 00:01:12,505 --> 00:01:15,668 He's like, "Baby, I love you." And she's like, "Where are we?" 29 00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:17,209 - And did you see the... - No. 30 00:01:17,277 --> 00:01:18,869 - Not that tape. - Oh. 31 00:01:18,945 --> 00:01:20,776 The one with all the scary images. 32 00:01:20,847 --> 00:01:23,315 After you watch the tape, the phone rings. 33 00:01:23,383 --> 00:01:26,546 And this scary voice comes on and says you're gonna die in... 34 00:01:26,619 --> 00:01:29,110 Seven days. I saw that one with Josh last weekend. 35 00:01:29,189 --> 00:01:31,316 You were with Josh last weekend? 36 00:01:31,391 --> 00:01:33,689 - Oh, my God! - [Laughs] 37 00:01:35,728 --> 00:01:37,696 Oh, yes, I was. 38 00:01:38,364 --> 00:01:39,661 Oh, you ho! 39 00:01:42,702 --> 00:01:43,669 You know it! 40 00:01:43,736 --> 00:01:45,363 Oh! 41 00:01:46,973 --> 00:01:48,565 - [Fabric ripping] - Aah! 42 00:01:48,641 --> 00:01:51,667 [Telephone ringing] 43 00:01:53,279 --> 00:01:54,541 [Snaps, whimpers] 44 00:01:57,617 --> 00:01:59,551 This is really weird. 45 00:01:59,619 --> 00:02:01,052 Yeah. 46 00:02:01,121 --> 00:02:04,215 Big house, only one phone. 47 00:02:07,227 --> 00:02:08,785 Hello? 48 00:02:16,136 --> 00:02:17,467 Hello? 49 00:02:17,537 --> 00:02:21,735 WOMAN: I'm coming for you, my precious. 50 00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:22,832 Hi, Mom. 51 00:02:22,909 --> 00:02:25,400 Hi, precious. Having fun? 52 00:02:25,478 --> 00:02:28,538 Hey, ask her which bathroom has the vibrating showerhead. 53 00:02:28,615 --> 00:02:31,049 [Thunder crashes] 54 00:02:31,117 --> 00:02:32,516 Hello? 55 00:02:33,286 --> 00:02:34,378 Hello? 56 00:02:34,454 --> 00:02:36,581 [Creaking] 57 00:02:55,308 --> 00:02:57,367 - [Toaster dings] - [Gasps, screams] 58 00:02:57,443 --> 00:02:59,035 [Squawking] 59 00:03:24,637 --> 00:03:26,298 Katie? 60 00:03:27,807 --> 00:03:29,468 Katie? 61 00:03:34,647 --> 00:03:36,308 Katie? 62 00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,856 Are you okay? 63 00:03:50,496 --> 00:03:52,589 Are you okay? 64 00:03:55,668 --> 00:03:57,533 Aah! 65 00:04:16,155 --> 00:04:19,147 [Girl screams] 66 00:04:19,225 --> 00:04:21,090 Ow. 67 00:04:21,961 --> 00:04:24,293 [Girl screams] 68 00:04:25,999 --> 00:04:27,660 God! 69 00:04:27,734 --> 00:04:29,895 [Urinating] 70 00:04:29,969 --> 00:04:31,732 [Girl screams] 71 00:04:31,804 --> 00:04:35,035 [Urinating stops, screaming stops] 72 00:04:35,108 --> 00:04:36,234 [Urinating resumes] 73 00:04:36,309 --> 00:04:37,503 [Girl screams] 74 00:04:37,577 --> 00:04:39,169 [Urinating stops, screaming stops] 75 00:04:39,245 --> 00:04:41,770 [Urinating resumes, screaming resumes, both stop] 76 00:04:41,848 --> 00:04:43,338 [Urinating resumes, screaming resumes, both stop] 77 00:04:43,416 --> 00:04:44,644 - Oh! - [Crash] 78 00:04:49,255 --> 00:04:51,917 [Wind whipping] 79 00:04:53,159 --> 00:04:54,888 Whoa. 80 00:04:57,196 --> 00:04:59,460 [Wind whipping] 81 00:04:59,532 --> 00:05:02,057 - Tom, did you hear... - [Dog barks] 82 00:05:02,135 --> 00:05:03,693 The dogs are acting strange. 83 00:05:03,770 --> 00:05:06,432 [Barking] 84 00:05:09,909 --> 00:05:11,001 [Whimpers] 85 00:05:11,077 --> 00:05:13,568 [Girl screams] 86 00:05:24,290 --> 00:05:25,723 [Girl screams] 87 00:05:25,792 --> 00:05:27,316 Sue! 88 00:05:27,894 --> 00:05:29,828 What are you doing out here? 89 00:05:29,896 --> 00:05:31,454 We were worried sick. 90 00:05:31,531 --> 00:05:32,759 What's wrong? 91 00:05:42,875 --> 00:05:45,070 I wonder what they're trying to tell us. 92 00:05:53,353 --> 00:05:54,581 ANNOUNCER: And now... 93 00:05:54,654 --> 00:05:57,748 Washington, D.C.'s leading morning news program, 94 00:05:57,824 --> 00:05:59,382 "The Morning News." 95 00:05:59,459 --> 00:06:01,017 Good morning. I'm Ross Giggins. 96 00:06:01,094 --> 00:06:03,654 For our top story, we turn now to Cindy Campbell. 97 00:06:03,730 --> 00:06:05,061 Thank you, Ross. 98 00:06:05,131 --> 00:06:07,793 There's a developing story in Middleburg at this hour. 99 00:06:07,867 --> 00:06:09,801 A mysterious crop circle appeared 100 00:06:09,869 --> 00:06:12,770 in local farmer Tom Logan's cornfield. 101 00:06:12,839 --> 00:06:16,400 Elaborate prank or extraterrestrial phenomenon? 102 00:06:16,476 --> 00:06:19,639 We'll update you as soon as we have any further information. 103 00:06:19,712 --> 00:06:21,942 But either way, it's clear something strange 104 00:06:22,014 --> 00:06:24,005 is happening in that small town. 105 00:06:24,083 --> 00:06:25,914 Ross? 106 00:06:25,985 --> 00:06:27,976 I'm sorry. I wasn't listening. 107 00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:30,386 Coming up, more news after this. 108 00:06:32,125 --> 00:06:33,888 - Cindy, you got a second? - Sure. 109 00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:37,020 I want you to take a look at this for that strip club exposé. 110 00:06:37,096 --> 00:06:39,155 But I'd rather stick with the crop circle story. 111 00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:41,530 Oh, come on. You know those things are just a hoax. 112 00:06:41,601 --> 00:06:44,502 No, I'm telling you, I sense something about that cornfield. 113 00:06:44,570 --> 00:06:47,437 Call it women's intuition or ESPN or both. 114 00:06:47,507 --> 00:06:49,532 But I can tell when danger's near. 115 00:06:49,609 --> 00:06:50,769 [Gasps] Ow! 116 00:06:50,843 --> 00:06:53,471 Ow! My eyes! 117 00:06:53,546 --> 00:06:56,811 Cindy, it's sweeps month. Ratings mean everything. 118 00:06:56,883 --> 00:06:59,613 People want human interest stories. 119 00:06:59,685 --> 00:07:01,118 Like the one you did yesterday. 120 00:07:01,187 --> 00:07:03,018 The report on breast augmentation? 121 00:07:03,089 --> 00:07:05,489 It was just 10 minutes of topless women. 122 00:07:05,558 --> 00:07:07,992 I mean, come on. 123 00:07:08,060 --> 00:07:09,459 MAN: Wow! 124 00:07:09,529 --> 00:07:10,996 Why are these so interesting? 125 00:07:11,063 --> 00:07:12,462 Oh, for God's sake. 126 00:07:12,532 --> 00:07:14,659 [Sighs] People don't care about this. 127 00:07:14,734 --> 00:07:18,397 They want hard-hitting stories and in-depth coverage and... 128 00:07:18,471 --> 00:07:19,699 And twins! 129 00:07:19,772 --> 00:07:23,503 I love parties that never end 130 00:07:23,576 --> 00:07:25,840 Dogs that love cats 131 00:07:25,912 --> 00:07:28,176 And... And twins 132 00:07:28,247 --> 00:07:32,479 I love burritos at 4:00 a.m. 133 00:07:32,552 --> 00:07:34,486 Parties that never end 134 00:07:34,554 --> 00:07:37,022 Dogs that love cats 135 00:07:39,725 --> 00:07:41,454 You think it was the Kreisel boys 136 00:07:41,527 --> 00:07:43,518 who cut that stuff into your corn? 137 00:07:43,596 --> 00:07:46,030 All I know is my crops are gone. 138 00:07:46,098 --> 00:07:49,363 The bank's gonna foreclose if I can't pay the rent. 139 00:07:49,435 --> 00:07:52,768 I got 60 days to come up with $ 1.50. 140 00:07:53,806 --> 00:07:55,535 I'm sorry. 141 00:07:55,608 --> 00:07:56,836 The last thing you needed was more... 142 00:07:56,909 --> 00:07:58,308 [Blowing nose] 143 00:07:58,377 --> 00:08:00,971 ...hardship in your life. 144 00:08:01,047 --> 00:08:02,639 Especially after what happened to... 145 00:08:02,715 --> 00:08:05,013 Sheriff, I don't need your sympathy. 146 00:08:05,084 --> 00:08:07,416 I didn't mean to upset you, Father. 147 00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:10,615 Please. I'm not a minister anymore. 148 00:08:10,690 --> 00:08:14,285 I lost my faith that terrible night. 149 00:08:14,360 --> 00:08:15,952 Your faith will return. 150 00:08:16,028 --> 00:08:18,929 Just as sure as the sun will rise. 151 00:08:18,998 --> 00:08:20,363 Sounds like a long shot. 152 00:08:20,433 --> 00:08:22,697 Look, there's always an explanation 153 00:08:22,768 --> 00:08:24,895 for all this so-called phenomena. 154 00:08:24,971 --> 00:08:26,199 Maybe you're right. 155 00:08:26,272 --> 00:08:28,467 It was probably just the Kreisels. 156 00:08:28,541 --> 00:08:30,304 And when I get through with them, 157 00:08:30,376 --> 00:08:32,810 I doubt you'll be seeing anything strange on this farm 158 00:08:32,879 --> 00:08:34,210 for a long time. 159 00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:36,214 You'll see. 160 00:08:37,717 --> 00:08:40,777 You all right, Tom? Get some rest. 161 00:08:48,227 --> 00:08:49,091 George! 162 00:08:49,161 --> 00:08:51,789 [Humming] 163 00:08:51,864 --> 00:08:53,525 George! 164 00:08:55,601 --> 00:08:58,661 I need you back here tomorrow night after you pick up Sue. 165 00:08:58,738 --> 00:09:00,000 That tractor needs fixing. 166 00:09:00,072 --> 00:09:03,235 Sorry, dawg. I can't help you. I have to get ready for my show. 167 00:09:03,309 --> 00:09:06,301 Not that stupid hip-hop stuff again. 168 00:09:06,379 --> 00:09:08,847 Damn it, when are you going to do something with your life? 169 00:09:08,915 --> 00:09:09,677 I got a dream! 170 00:09:09,749 --> 00:09:11,979 - What is your dream? - To have a dream. 171 00:09:12,051 --> 00:09:15,748 George, all you've done is chase adolescent fantasies. 172 00:09:15,821 --> 00:09:17,914 "I want to be an astronaut. A cowboy. 173 00:09:17,990 --> 00:09:19,753 Gynecologist to the stars." 174 00:09:19,825 --> 00:09:21,622 And now this stupid hip-hop thing. 175 00:09:21,694 --> 00:09:22,752 For your information, 176 00:09:22,828 --> 00:09:25,296 this hip-hop thing is gonna get me paid. 177 00:09:25,364 --> 00:09:27,025 I'm gonna win that rap battle. 178 00:09:27,099 --> 00:09:29,294 Rap battle? Oh, for God's sake. 179 00:09:29,368 --> 00:09:32,428 You just hate me 'cause I'm black. 180 00:09:32,505 --> 00:09:33,995 You don't have any faith in me. 181 00:09:34,073 --> 00:09:36,064 You don't have any faith in anything anymore. 182 00:09:36,142 --> 00:09:37,939 So why don't you just worry about you, 183 00:09:38,010 --> 00:09:40,979 and I'll worry about... Aah! 184 00:09:53,159 --> 00:09:55,787 [Car alarm activates] 185 00:09:57,797 --> 00:09:59,594 Cody! 186 00:10:00,566 --> 00:10:02,534 You're late again, Aunt Cindy. 187 00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:04,695 I'm sorry. I was stuck in traffic. 188 00:10:04,770 --> 00:10:05,794 Cindy! 189 00:10:05,871 --> 00:10:07,395 Brenda, hi! 190 00:10:07,473 --> 00:10:10,306 Oh, it's great to see you! 191 00:10:10,376 --> 00:10:12,503 Oh, it's been so long. 192 00:10:12,578 --> 00:10:15,376 Oh, too long. I've been working so hard. 193 00:10:15,448 --> 00:10:17,643 I've had to spend more and more time at the station. 194 00:10:17,717 --> 00:10:20,584 The news just keeps coming in. 195 00:10:20,653 --> 00:10:22,314 What was the assignment? 196 00:10:22,388 --> 00:10:24,083 Draw your family and friends. 197 00:10:24,156 --> 00:10:25,487 Oh. 198 00:10:25,558 --> 00:10:27,185 Anyone new in your life, Cindy? 199 00:10:27,259 --> 00:10:30,592 Well, you know, I just haven't found the right guy. 200 00:10:30,663 --> 00:10:33,257 I'm looking for something more than just good sex. 201 00:10:33,332 --> 00:10:34,890 I know. You want commitment. 202 00:10:34,967 --> 00:10:37,629 No, I want great sex. And when I meet that guy... 203 00:10:37,703 --> 00:10:40,171 That's what I'm talking 'bout! 204 00:10:40,239 --> 00:10:42,730 You want a guy that's like, bam, bam, bam! 205 00:10:42,808 --> 00:10:45,038 You know what I'm saying? 206 00:10:45,111 --> 00:10:47,375 Did I say stop drawing? 207 00:10:47,446 --> 00:10:50,415 Look, when I meet Mr. Right, I'll know. 208 00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:51,745 [Humming] 209 00:10:51,817 --> 00:10:53,250 Uncle George! 210 00:10:53,319 --> 00:10:55,549 Hey, sweetie! Come here! 211 00:10:55,621 --> 00:10:57,248 How are you? Oh! 212 00:10:57,323 --> 00:11:00,053 Mmm! Go get your stuff, okay? 213 00:11:01,427 --> 00:11:02,587 I know you. 214 00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:04,755 You're Tom Logan's brother. 215 00:11:04,830 --> 00:11:07,264 And you're that reporter, Cindy Campbell. 216 00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:09,665 You did the story on our cop cycles. 217 00:11:09,735 --> 00:11:10,929 Crop circles. 218 00:11:11,003 --> 00:11:12,561 Right. 219 00:11:13,205 --> 00:11:15,366 So, you're here to pick up your... 220 00:11:15,441 --> 00:11:16,908 Nephew, Cody. 221 00:11:16,976 --> 00:11:18,807 You don't dress like a farmer. 222 00:11:18,878 --> 00:11:20,470 My brother's the farmer. 223 00:11:20,546 --> 00:11:22,275 I'm the rapper. 224 00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:24,213 - Hmm. - Oh, for real. 225 00:11:24,283 --> 00:11:25,910 And here's the 6-1-1 on that. 226 00:11:25,985 --> 00:11:29,546 That's phone repair. You mean 4-1-1. 227 00:11:29,622 --> 00:11:30,611 Right. 228 00:11:30,690 --> 00:11:34,456 So, I'll be doing the rap battle at the 23 Club tomorrow night. 229 00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:35,892 Oh, I don't believe this shit. 230 00:11:35,961 --> 00:11:38,225 Word! You two should come down! 231 00:11:38,297 --> 00:11:39,594 I'll be rappin', I'll be cappin', 232 00:11:39,665 --> 00:11:41,428 I'll be tappin', I'll be flappin', 233 00:11:41,500 --> 00:11:43,730 I'll be happen-ing. 234 00:11:43,803 --> 00:11:45,771 Ding, bing, wing. 235 00:11:45,838 --> 00:11:47,772 - Yo! - Sounds good! 236 00:11:47,840 --> 00:11:49,102 Would, could, should, 'hood. 237 00:11:49,175 --> 00:11:51,473 - Ugh! - Gug, mug, dug, bug. 238 00:11:51,544 --> 00:11:55,071 If we say we'll come, will you shut your ass up? 239 00:11:55,147 --> 00:11:57,411 Okay, then. Fresh. 240 00:11:57,483 --> 00:11:59,075 I'll see you guys tomorrow night. 241 00:11:59,151 --> 00:12:00,584 Okay. Bye. 242 00:12:00,653 --> 00:12:01,779 Peace out. 243 00:12:06,726 --> 00:12:08,956 Now, who the fuck did that? 244 00:12:14,800 --> 00:12:16,131 Honey, what is it? 245 00:12:16,202 --> 00:12:17,567 Are you having one of your visions? 246 00:12:17,636 --> 00:12:20,537 There's a girl... with black hair. 247 00:12:20,606 --> 00:12:23,040 She wants to kill you. 248 00:12:23,109 --> 00:12:27,671 Your period starts in three... two... one. 249 00:12:27,747 --> 00:12:30,272 What else? Cody, what else do you see? 250 00:12:30,349 --> 00:12:33,011 I see a little boy and a grown woman. 251 00:12:33,085 --> 00:12:34,017 But no father. 252 00:12:34,086 --> 00:12:35,314 Oh, Cody. 253 00:12:35,387 --> 00:12:37,287 I see you kneeling in dog shit. 254 00:12:37,356 --> 00:12:39,551 What? Ugh! 255 00:12:39,625 --> 00:12:42,185 Oh, for God's sake. 256 00:12:42,261 --> 00:12:43,853 Cody, don't you understand? 257 00:12:43,929 --> 00:12:46,989 As long as we have each other, that's all we need. 258 00:12:47,066 --> 00:12:49,796 I know things have been tough for you since your mom died. 259 00:12:49,869 --> 00:12:54,135 God, I have been so selfish. Always putting my career first. 260 00:12:54,206 --> 00:12:57,369 From now on, I'm gonna be thinking about you 24... 261 00:12:58,244 --> 00:13:00,212 Damn! 262 00:13:00,279 --> 00:13:02,975 Wait, Cindy! Wait! 263 00:13:03,415 --> 00:13:06,407 Aah! 264 00:13:18,397 --> 00:13:21,798 Honey, I'm gonna be leaving soon, so... 265 00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:37,214 Do you know who she is? 266 00:13:37,283 --> 00:13:38,944 No. 267 00:13:39,018 --> 00:13:41,316 But sometimes she talks to me. 268 00:13:41,387 --> 00:13:43,116 She's coming tonight. 269 00:13:43,189 --> 00:13:45,783 [Knock on door] 270 00:13:55,968 --> 00:13:57,697 Oh, Father Muldoon. 271 00:13:57,770 --> 00:13:59,135 Cindy. 272 00:13:59,205 --> 00:14:01,196 I'm so grateful you could come. 273 00:14:01,273 --> 00:14:03,173 I've called all over for babysitters. 274 00:14:03,242 --> 00:14:06,302 I don't mind filling in now and then. 275 00:14:06,378 --> 00:14:08,437 Where is little Cody? 276 00:14:08,514 --> 00:14:10,277 [Footsteps] 277 00:14:10,349 --> 00:14:11,782 - [Door slams] - I don't know. 278 00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:13,785 He must be back in his room, playing. 279 00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:16,720 Anyway, I left a number where I can be reached on the table. 280 00:14:16,789 --> 00:14:19,553 Also, he has a little rash on his behind. 281 00:14:19,625 --> 00:14:21,820 So make sure he takes a bath. 282 00:14:21,894 --> 00:14:24,362 Thank you, Father. Good night. 283 00:14:27,099 --> 00:14:28,589 Cody? 284 00:14:29,501 --> 00:14:30,866 You can't stop us 285 00:14:30,936 --> 00:14:32,267 Who you looking at? 286 00:14:32,338 --> 00:14:33,669 Don't try to drop us 287 00:14:33,739 --> 00:14:35,502 This ain't no... 288 00:14:35,574 --> 00:14:38,407 [Crowd cheering] 289 00:14:39,745 --> 00:14:42,680 MAHALIK: Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's getting thick up in here. 290 00:14:42,748 --> 00:14:45,342 Hey, look, before we get on with the battles tonight, 291 00:14:45,417 --> 00:14:47,180 I got a couple announcements to make. 292 00:14:47,253 --> 00:14:49,346 I know y'all want to bust a cap in the air 293 00:14:49,421 --> 00:14:50,615 for your favorite rapper. 294 00:14:50,689 --> 00:14:53,817 But if you could please hold on to your gunfire 295 00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:55,861 until the end of the show. 296 00:14:55,928 --> 00:14:57,190 [Jeering] 297 00:14:57,263 --> 00:14:58,855 Let's just put the safeties on. 298 00:14:58,931 --> 00:15:01,957 It's on the left side of the gun above the trigger guard. 299 00:15:02,034 --> 00:15:04,502 [Bullet ricochets, woman shrieks] 300 00:15:04,570 --> 00:15:07,471 Will somebody get his ass out of here? 301 00:15:07,539 --> 00:15:10,770 All right. Deejay, spin that shit! 302 00:15:10,843 --> 00:15:13,869 [Up-tempo beat plays] 303 00:15:16,415 --> 00:15:18,747 [Crowd cheers] 304 00:15:31,130 --> 00:15:32,961 Whoa! My bad. 305 00:15:33,032 --> 00:15:34,693 Mother... 306 00:15:37,903 --> 00:15:41,066 Brenda, is something wrong? You look scared. 307 00:15:41,140 --> 00:15:44,166 I don't know. All that stuff you was saying on TV... 308 00:15:44,243 --> 00:15:47,178 I just got a weird feeling something bad is heading my way. 309 00:15:47,246 --> 00:15:49,043 Like when you see an Asian person 310 00:15:49,114 --> 00:15:50,411 behind the wheel of a car. 311 00:15:50,482 --> 00:15:54,145 Cindy, after the show, you think you could come back to my crib 312 00:15:54,219 --> 00:15:55,481 and hang out with me? 313 00:15:55,554 --> 00:15:56,987 I don't want to be alone. 314 00:15:57,056 --> 00:15:58,990 Oh, of course I will, Brenda. 315 00:15:59,058 --> 00:16:01,026 Oh, I love you. 316 00:16:01,093 --> 00:16:03,561 Pay my way, okay? 317 00:16:03,629 --> 00:16:05,096 Yo, yo, yo, George! 318 00:16:05,164 --> 00:16:07,359 What's up with the man with the tightest rap game 319 00:16:07,433 --> 00:16:08,866 on the streets, baby? 320 00:16:08,934 --> 00:16:10,526 - What's good with you, boy? - Dude! 321 00:16:10,602 --> 00:16:12,365 What's good, baby? 322 00:16:12,438 --> 00:16:15,236 Finally, the white man is gonna school the black man 323 00:16:15,307 --> 00:16:16,239 on how to rap. 324 00:16:16,308 --> 00:16:18,435 - Yeah! - Yeah. Yeah, I guess. 325 00:16:18,510 --> 00:16:20,205 How many people are here, you think? 326 00:16:20,279 --> 00:16:21,246 I don't know, man. 327 00:16:21,313 --> 00:16:24,339 100, 200 whitey-hating, chrome-packing, 328 00:16:24,416 --> 00:16:26,179 ready to bust a cap in any white boy's ass 329 00:16:26,251 --> 00:16:28,719 - who ain't bringing that shit. - Yeah. At least. Yeah. 330 00:16:28,787 --> 00:16:29,754 Mm-hmm. Word. 331 00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:32,017 What's wrong, George? 332 00:16:32,091 --> 00:16:34,423 You ever wonder when it's time to stop living up here 333 00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:36,154 and start living down here? 334 00:16:36,228 --> 00:16:40,028 No, but what if we stop living over here and move over there? 335 00:16:40,099 --> 00:16:42,192 My Aunt ShaNeequa used to live over there, man. 336 00:16:42,267 --> 00:16:43,359 But that bitch got evicted. 337 00:16:43,435 --> 00:16:45,096 - Word? What for? - I'm dead serious. 338 00:16:45,170 --> 00:16:47,331 - Mice. - Mice? I thought she had rats. 339 00:16:47,406 --> 00:16:49,306 No, man. Rats are outside. Mice are inside. 340 00:16:49,375 --> 00:16:51,570 What if a mouse goes outside? Does it become a rat? 341 00:16:51,643 --> 00:16:53,304 If a rat is in the house, is it a mouse? 342 00:16:53,379 --> 00:16:55,540 I ain't never seen no mouse outside. 343 00:16:55,614 --> 00:16:56,945 That's because it's a rat, fool! 344 00:16:57,016 --> 00:17:00,281 Damn, you might have just made a fact just now. 345 00:17:00,352 --> 00:17:02,479 Fellas, what are you guys talking about? 346 00:17:02,554 --> 00:17:04,078 Yo, George, you need something? 347 00:17:04,156 --> 00:17:06,386 'Cause I will do anything for you. 348 00:17:07,126 --> 00:17:08,286 Anything. 349 00:17:09,695 --> 00:17:11,720 Well, about those chrome-packing, 350 00:17:11,797 --> 00:17:13,287 whitey-hating gangsters, perhaps... 351 00:17:13,365 --> 00:17:15,629 - What he need is a hype man. - Word! 352 00:17:15,701 --> 00:17:17,396 Yeah, yeah, a-come on 353 00:17:17,469 --> 00:17:18,800 You can be his Spliff Star. 354 00:17:18,871 --> 00:17:19,963 That's me. That's what I do. 355 00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:21,904 That's my job, baby! That's what I do! 356 00:17:21,974 --> 00:17:23,407 You know that. Goddamn. 357 00:17:23,475 --> 00:17:24,737 [Crash] 358 00:17:24,810 --> 00:17:25,936 I'm cool. That's what I do. 359 00:17:26,011 --> 00:17:29,105 When you a hype man, you take them hits. 360 00:17:29,181 --> 00:17:31,411 Heads or tail, playboy, what's it gonna be? 361 00:17:31,483 --> 00:17:33,747 You cannot escape your fate in the streets 362 00:17:33,819 --> 00:17:36,253 Okay, I count cash, you count sheep 363 00:17:36,321 --> 00:17:38,812 You better not sleep on the beats, capisce 364 00:17:38,891 --> 00:17:40,051 [Crowd cheering] 365 00:17:40,125 --> 00:17:42,252 All right, all right, all right! That was hot! 366 00:17:42,327 --> 00:17:44,693 That's what I'm talking about. That was hot, right? 367 00:17:44,763 --> 00:17:46,924 Right? Yo, what do we think? 368 00:17:49,635 --> 00:17:52,832 I thought you were both absolutely dreadful. 369 00:17:52,905 --> 00:17:53,997 Ghastly. 370 00:17:54,073 --> 00:17:54,937 What? 371 00:17:55,007 --> 00:17:57,032 I don't know what I'm doing here. 372 00:17:57,109 --> 00:17:59,942 This club is totally pathetic. 373 00:18:00,012 --> 00:18:01,604 [Crowd yelling] 374 00:18:09,288 --> 00:18:11,381 Everybody put your hands up 375 00:18:11,457 --> 00:18:12,424 You ready, George? 376 00:18:12,491 --> 00:18:14,220 - It's showtime, baby. - Okay. 377 00:18:14,293 --> 00:18:16,352 I just want to let you know no matter what goes on 378 00:18:16,428 --> 00:18:18,589 on that stage tonight... 379 00:18:19,364 --> 00:18:20,695 you'll always be in my heart. 380 00:18:20,766 --> 00:18:22,734 Oh, that's love. That's love right there. 381 00:18:22,801 --> 00:18:25,326 - I love you. - That's what I'm talking about. 382 00:18:27,940 --> 00:18:30,306 I love you, man. Can you feel it? 383 00:18:30,375 --> 00:18:32,366 Can you feel my love on your hip? 384 00:18:32,444 --> 00:18:33,376 Can you feel it? 385 00:18:33,445 --> 00:18:34,605 C. J: I can't get around! 386 00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:36,671 Come on, dawg! That's what I'm talkin' about! 387 00:18:36,748 --> 00:18:39,216 You go out there and you rip it tonight. All right, man? 388 00:18:39,284 --> 00:18:40,979 You do your thing tonight, all right? 389 00:18:41,053 --> 00:18:42,714 - Okay. Cool. - We shouldn't have to do that. 390 00:18:42,788 --> 00:18:44,016 We love each other. 391 00:18:44,089 --> 00:18:45,147 I'm gonna go bring you on. 392 00:18:45,224 --> 00:18:46,691 Let's do it, baby. We hyped! 393 00:18:47,292 --> 00:18:48,691 Yeah. All right, all right. 394 00:18:48,760 --> 00:18:51,422 Y'all ready for the next throwdown? 395 00:18:51,497 --> 00:18:54,591 To my left, we have the reigning champion. 396 00:18:54,666 --> 00:18:56,964 Hailing from Fort Apache in the Bronx. 397 00:18:57,035 --> 00:18:58,366 B X! What? What? What? 398 00:18:58,437 --> 00:19:01,167 Some of y'all call him "Jealous Ones Still Envy." 399 00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:04,107 Some of y'all call him the Don Cartagena! 400 00:19:04,176 --> 00:19:06,235 Some of y'all call him Joey Crack. 401 00:19:06,311 --> 00:19:07,073 Stick 'em up! 402 00:19:07,146 --> 00:19:11,276 But, tonight, let's give it up for Fat Joe! 403 00:19:13,152 --> 00:19:14,710 I got to go against him? 404 00:19:14,786 --> 00:19:16,447 Give it up! Give it up! 405 00:19:16,522 --> 00:19:18,456 What you think, they're here to see Fat Joe? 406 00:19:18,524 --> 00:19:20,515 CROWD: Joe! Joe! Joe! 407 00:19:20,592 --> 00:19:22,753 No, man, they're saying, "Go! Go! Go!" 408 00:19:24,096 --> 00:19:26,860 Now my challenger. Whoo! 409 00:19:26,932 --> 00:19:28,456 He's a farmer rapper. 410 00:19:28,534 --> 00:19:31,469 So you know he been kicking the shit all day! 411 00:19:31,537 --> 00:19:33,903 Let's give it up for my man, George! 412 00:19:33,972 --> 00:19:36,532 That's what I'm talking about! Yeah! Yeah! 413 00:19:36,608 --> 00:19:39,441 Come on, everybody! Put your hands... 414 00:19:39,511 --> 00:19:42,036 That's right. Okay, Joey Crack. 415 00:19:42,114 --> 00:19:45,345 You're the reigning champion, so you get to spit first. 416 00:19:45,417 --> 00:19:47,214 Yo, deejay, spin that shit! 417 00:19:47,286 --> 00:19:49,311 [Mid-tempo beat plays] 418 00:19:49,388 --> 00:19:51,379 These guys can't be serious right here. 419 00:19:51,456 --> 00:19:52,787 Stan and Mini-Me 420 00:19:52,858 --> 00:19:55,383 A.K.A. I hope he ain't the one you fight with 421 00:19:55,460 --> 00:19:57,121 Hey, yo, this nigga's mad corny 422 00:19:57,196 --> 00:19:59,892 And ain't got no skills, 'cause he's all right 423 00:19:59,965 --> 00:20:01,262 TOGETHER: But he's not real 424 00:20:01,333 --> 00:20:02,300 Don't mean to hurt your feelings 425 00:20:02,367 --> 00:20:03,425 But you'll never get a deal 426 00:20:03,502 --> 00:20:05,800 'Cause he's all right, but he's not real 427 00:20:05,871 --> 00:20:07,395 You're a needle in a haystack 428 00:20:07,472 --> 00:20:09,167 I'm the don, the city slicker 429 00:20:09,241 --> 00:20:10,833 Forget cows and milk your moms 430 00:20:10,909 --> 00:20:13,241 Her titties give ya that elixir 431 00:20:13,312 --> 00:20:14,244 Thought he wasn't? 432 00:20:14,313 --> 00:20:16,747 Bet this nigga end up having kids with his cousin 433 00:20:16,815 --> 00:20:19,443 Half-retarded, my number-one fan be like 434 00:20:19,518 --> 00:20:20,507 [Stammers] 435 00:20:20,586 --> 00:20:22,281 That means Fat Joe's the man 436 00:20:22,354 --> 00:20:24,345 You're a liar in denial 437 00:20:24,423 --> 00:20:27,153 Kill your ass quicker than I died in "Empire" 438 00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:29,319 How dare you want to joust with me? 439 00:20:29,394 --> 00:20:32,124 Looking like you dying of S ARS or mad cow disease 440 00:20:32,197 --> 00:20:34,597 You fake B-Rabbit out to battle me 441 00:20:34,666 --> 00:20:36,327 Eight miles down the road 442 00:20:36,401 --> 00:20:37,925 The farm's thataway 443 00:20:38,003 --> 00:20:41,666 Oh! Okay, let's go! Wait a minute! 444 00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:43,935 MAHALIK: Whoo! All right! 445 00:20:44,009 --> 00:20:45,306 All right! That was hot! 446 00:20:45,377 --> 00:20:47,436 That was tight, Fat Joe. Yo! 447 00:20:47,512 --> 00:20:51,710 Now everybody give it up for my man, George! 448 00:20:51,783 --> 00:20:53,444 Deejay, spin that shit! 449 00:20:53,518 --> 00:20:56,009 - Whoo! - [Mid-tempo beat plays] 450 00:20:56,088 --> 00:20:58,488 Come on! Come on! Everybody! 451 00:20:59,891 --> 00:21:01,449 [Note plays] 452 00:21:01,526 --> 00:21:02,993 Bitch 453 00:21:03,061 --> 00:21:03,993 [Lower note plays] 454 00:21:04,062 --> 00:21:05,154 Ho 455 00:21:05,230 --> 00:21:08,222 [Notes playing] 456 00:21:16,241 --> 00:21:18,505 Now everybody in the 2-0-2 457 00:21:18,577 --> 00:21:21,740 Throw your hands in the air 'cause Fat Joe is through 458 00:21:21,813 --> 00:21:24,543 Now everybody in the 2-0-2, throw 'em up 459 00:21:24,616 --> 00:21:26,880 - Check it out. - [Chanting] Go! Go! Go! 460 00:21:26,952 --> 00:21:29,352 I'm a white boy, but my neck is red 461 00:21:29,421 --> 00:21:32,015 I put Miracle Whip on my Wonder Bread 462 00:21:32,090 --> 00:21:35,059 My face is pale, Nah, I've never been in jail 463 00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:37,220 Me and Buffy spend every winter at Vail 464 00:21:37,296 --> 00:21:39,196 How many bitches have I slapped? 465 00:21:39,264 --> 00:21:40,492 Zero, unh 466 00:21:40,565 --> 00:21:42,931 And Martha Stewart happens to be my hero 467 00:21:43,001 --> 00:21:45,731 I grew up on a farm, and I was born with no rhythm 468 00:21:45,804 --> 00:21:48,364 Dr. Phil's my uncle, and I like to hang with him 469 00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:50,931 I can't dance, I wear khaki pants 470 00:21:51,009 --> 00:21:53,876 My middle name's Lance, my grandma's from France 471 00:21:53,945 --> 00:21:56,345 So maybe I'm wack 'cause my skin ain't black 472 00:21:56,415 --> 00:21:57,541 But you can't talk smack 473 00:21:57,616 --> 00:21:59,447 'Cause whitey just struck back 474 00:22:02,954 --> 00:22:04,444 Whoo! 475 00:22:05,757 --> 00:22:08,055 That's what I'm talking about! 476 00:22:08,126 --> 00:22:11,755 MAHALIK: Give it up for George! 477 00:22:11,830 --> 00:22:13,957 That's my boy right there! That's what... 478 00:22:14,032 --> 00:22:15,624 Oh, shit. Ooh. 479 00:22:18,203 --> 00:22:20,262 [Crowd murmuring] 480 00:22:20,339 --> 00:22:22,273 George! George! The hood! 481 00:22:22,341 --> 00:22:23,603 Lose the hood! 482 00:22:23,675 --> 00:22:26,200 - I know. We're in the 'hood now! - No, man! 483 00:22:26,278 --> 00:22:27,802 He's a dead man. 484 00:22:27,879 --> 00:22:30,404 You guys feeling me? In the 'hood? 485 00:22:30,482 --> 00:22:32,780 [Crowd booing] 486 00:22:32,851 --> 00:22:34,614 Whoa! Whoa! 487 00:22:34,686 --> 00:22:36,517 Aah! 488 00:22:37,923 --> 00:22:39,857 That's it. I'm done. 489 00:22:39,925 --> 00:22:42,393 Oh, man, you can't give up rap just like that. 490 00:22:42,461 --> 00:22:43,985 Rap shmap. 491 00:22:44,062 --> 00:22:46,724 Look! You still got it! See? 492 00:22:47,766 --> 00:22:50,200 BRENDA: Thanks for coming over tonight, Cindy. 493 00:22:50,268 --> 00:22:52,759 I guess I'm just going through a rough time. 494 00:22:52,838 --> 00:22:57,036 Brenda, you want to tell me what's really bothering you? 495 00:22:58,977 --> 00:23:01,946 Well, there's something I need to... 496 00:23:02,013 --> 00:23:03,674 I saw a tape. 497 00:23:03,749 --> 00:23:05,842 I think you should know about it. 498 00:23:05,917 --> 00:23:08,818 It had these really shocking images, Cindy. 499 00:23:08,887 --> 00:23:11,447 Brenda, it was Mardi Gras. 500 00:23:11,523 --> 00:23:14,651 I never drank vodka before, and I was out of beads! 501 00:23:14,726 --> 00:23:16,694 No, not that tape, Cindy. 502 00:23:16,762 --> 00:23:18,992 Well, I guess it's just an urban legend. 503 00:23:19,064 --> 00:23:21,362 You watch it. 504 00:23:21,433 --> 00:23:23,867 And as soon as it's over, your phone rings 505 00:23:23,935 --> 00:23:25,368 and a creepy voice says... 506 00:23:25,437 --> 00:23:28,031 [Distorted voice] "You're gonna die in seven days." 507 00:23:28,106 --> 00:23:31,132 [Normal voice] And seven days later... 508 00:23:31,209 --> 00:23:32,608 When did you watch it? 509 00:23:32,677 --> 00:23:34,770 A week ago. 510 00:23:34,846 --> 00:23:36,313 A week ago tonight. 511 00:23:36,381 --> 00:23:38,144 Brenda. 512 00:23:42,421 --> 00:23:44,616 Oh, my God! 513 00:23:44,689 --> 00:23:46,782 - Oh, Brenda! - [Choking] 514 00:23:48,093 --> 00:23:50,493 Brenda! Oh, my God! 515 00:23:52,464 --> 00:23:54,728 - Oh! Oh! - [Laughs] 516 00:23:54,800 --> 00:23:56,995 Oh, my God! You bitch! 517 00:23:57,068 --> 00:23:58,501 Ketchup! 518 00:23:58,570 --> 00:24:01,733 You should have seen the look on your face! 519 00:24:02,741 --> 00:24:04,038 You got me! 520 00:24:06,611 --> 00:24:09,307 - Brenda? Brenda? - [Stammering] 521 00:24:09,381 --> 00:24:11,076 Oh, my God, Brenda! Brenda? 522 00:24:11,149 --> 00:24:12,207 [Screams] 523 00:24:21,393 --> 00:24:23,987 I can't believe you fell for that fake seizure! 524 00:24:24,062 --> 00:24:25,427 But it seemed so real! 525 00:24:25,497 --> 00:24:27,829 - It did, didn't it? - And you peed! 526 00:24:27,899 --> 00:24:31,062 Yeah! I really sold that shit, didn't I? 527 00:24:31,736 --> 00:24:34,534 I just love the look on your face when you are scared! 528 00:24:34,606 --> 00:24:36,198 Girl, you are too easy. 529 00:24:36,274 --> 00:24:38,071 - Aah! - Aah! 530 00:24:44,015 --> 00:24:46,984 I got you with the old fake hand! 531 00:24:47,919 --> 00:24:49,284 Ooh! 532 00:24:49,354 --> 00:24:50,685 Girl, you were scared! 533 00:24:50,755 --> 00:24:52,120 Well, I know! 534 00:24:52,190 --> 00:24:54,055 Oh, come on. I was just kidding. 535 00:24:54,125 --> 00:24:56,252 Well, you've taken it too far, Brenda. 536 00:24:56,328 --> 00:24:59,263 I'm gonna go get the rest of the popcorn. 537 00:25:05,637 --> 00:25:06,899 Cindy? 538 00:25:06,972 --> 00:25:09,566 Oh, forget it. I am not falling for it again. 539 00:25:26,725 --> 00:25:28,716 Oh, come on. 540 00:25:28,793 --> 00:25:30,818 Cindy, the news is on. 541 00:25:30,896 --> 00:25:33,956 Another little white girl done fell down a well. 542 00:25:34,032 --> 00:25:36,694 50 black people get their ass beat by police today, 543 00:25:36,768 --> 00:25:38,292 but the whole world got to stop 544 00:25:38,370 --> 00:25:40,964 for one little whitey down a hole. 545 00:25:45,176 --> 00:25:46,734 Cindy! 546 00:25:48,880 --> 00:25:51,371 The TV's leaking! 547 00:25:52,751 --> 00:25:53,911 Cindy? 548 00:25:53,985 --> 00:25:56,419 Cindy, something's wrong here. 549 00:26:12,370 --> 00:26:15,862 Cindy, this bitch is messing up my floor! 550 00:26:17,509 --> 00:26:19,306 [Whimpers] 551 00:26:19,377 --> 00:26:21,368 Cindy, help me! 552 00:26:21,446 --> 00:26:22,936 I'm not listening. 553 00:26:25,350 --> 00:26:27,215 Get up, you little ugly bitch, 554 00:26:27,285 --> 00:26:28,980 Come on! Let me see what you got! 555 00:26:29,054 --> 00:26:32,023 What you gonna do? That's all? 556 00:26:32,891 --> 00:26:34,518 Ooh! 557 00:26:35,226 --> 00:26:38,059 Ooh! I'm whipping her ass, Cindy! 558 00:26:38,129 --> 00:26:39,494 Yeah! What's up? 559 00:26:39,564 --> 00:26:41,293 [Grunts] 560 00:26:41,366 --> 00:26:43,027 Ooh! 561 00:26:51,576 --> 00:26:53,305 Aah! 562 00:26:53,378 --> 00:26:56,176 Cindy, please help me! 563 00:26:56,247 --> 00:26:58,272 - Cindy! - [Telephone rings] 564 00:26:58,350 --> 00:27:00,545 Okay. Hang on a second. 565 00:27:00,619 --> 00:27:01,551 Hello? 566 00:27:01,620 --> 00:27:04,180 Father Muldoon here. We're getting along famously. 567 00:27:04,255 --> 00:27:06,348 Thanks again, Father. Bye-bye. 568 00:27:06,424 --> 00:27:08,119 Brenda? 569 00:27:08,693 --> 00:27:10,251 Brenda? 570 00:27:12,897 --> 00:27:14,558 Brenda? 571 00:27:20,238 --> 00:27:22,570 Aah! 572 00:27:27,412 --> 00:27:29,004 GEORGE: Oh, my God. 573 00:27:29,080 --> 00:27:30,672 Yes. Yes. Of course I'll tell her. 574 00:27:30,749 --> 00:27:32,376 Thank you. 575 00:27:33,952 --> 00:27:36,045 Sue's teacher, Brenda. 576 00:27:36,121 --> 00:27:37,053 She's... 577 00:27:37,122 --> 00:27:38,054 She's dead. 578 00:27:38,123 --> 00:27:40,717 Oh. I better tell her. 579 00:27:40,792 --> 00:27:42,885 No, no, no. I can do it. 580 00:27:48,566 --> 00:27:49,726 Sue? 581 00:27:49,801 --> 00:27:51,735 Yes? 582 00:27:51,803 --> 00:27:54,135 You know your teacher, Miss Brenda? 583 00:27:54,205 --> 00:27:54,967 Yeah. 584 00:27:55,040 --> 00:27:57,235 - She's dead! - Aah! 585 00:27:57,308 --> 00:27:58,570 Gone forever! 586 00:27:58,643 --> 00:28:00,907 Died a horrible, painful death! 587 00:28:00,979 --> 00:28:03,607 Gone, gone, gone, just like your dog! 588 00:28:03,682 --> 00:28:04,979 My dog's dead? 589 00:28:05,050 --> 00:28:08,577 I just ran him over with the car when I drove in! 590 00:28:08,653 --> 00:28:11,281 Everyone you love around you is dying! 591 00:28:11,356 --> 00:28:13,790 - Aah! - Aah! 592 00:28:20,398 --> 00:28:22,559 Hello, Father. 593 00:28:22,634 --> 00:28:24,602 Don't call me Father. 594 00:28:24,669 --> 00:28:27,160 I haven't been a clergyman since... 595 00:28:29,607 --> 00:28:32,576 I'm sorry about that night. 596 00:28:32,644 --> 00:28:34,407 If I hadn't fallen asleep while driving 597 00:28:34,479 --> 00:28:37,073 for that exact 20 minutes. 598 00:28:37,148 --> 00:28:40,640 If I hadn't drank that exact whole bottle of Jägermeister. 599 00:28:40,719 --> 00:28:43,745 If only I hadn't killed that hooker. 600 00:28:43,822 --> 00:28:45,619 Sayaman. 601 00:28:45,690 --> 00:28:47,954 I don't see what any of this has to do with Annie. 602 00:28:48,026 --> 00:28:50,893 I'm sorry. Those were other nights. 603 00:28:50,962 --> 00:28:55,865 But if it had been that night, I might have missed her. 604 00:28:55,934 --> 00:28:57,367 That terrible night. 605 00:28:57,435 --> 00:28:58,868 [Whimpers] 606 00:28:58,937 --> 00:29:01,599 ["Mexican Hat Dance" plays] 607 00:29:03,508 --> 00:29:04,839 Hey! 608 00:29:17,789 --> 00:29:19,222 It's your wife, Father. 609 00:29:19,290 --> 00:29:20,814 She's hurt. 610 00:29:20,892 --> 00:29:21,688 Annie? 611 00:29:21,760 --> 00:29:24,854 She was hit by a truck, and she's pinned against a tree. 612 00:29:24,929 --> 00:29:25,987 I don't understand. 613 00:29:26,064 --> 00:29:30,000 As long as the truck has her pinned, she'll stay alive. 614 00:29:30,068 --> 00:29:31,899 I still don't get it. 615 00:29:35,840 --> 00:29:39,742 This is your wife. 616 00:29:41,112 --> 00:29:43,103 She broke her wiener? 617 00:29:44,983 --> 00:29:48,578 Look what happens to the taco. 618 00:29:49,621 --> 00:29:52,886 Look, I don't understand all this fancy medical lingo. 619 00:29:52,957 --> 00:29:54,788 I want to see Annie. 620 00:29:55,660 --> 00:29:57,924 She's split in half. 621 00:29:57,996 --> 00:30:02,660 You mean like down-the-middle in half? 622 00:30:02,734 --> 00:30:03,860 At the waist. 623 00:30:03,935 --> 00:30:08,304 You mean this is the last time I can talk to the top half? 624 00:30:08,373 --> 00:30:09,897 Yes. 625 00:30:09,974 --> 00:30:13,535 The truck is the only thing that is holding her together. 626 00:30:13,611 --> 00:30:17,172 Let's say this is her bottom half. 627 00:30:17,248 --> 00:30:20,046 Can I squeeze in a few minutes with that? 628 00:30:20,118 --> 00:30:23,144 I'm not sure what you mean. 629 00:30:23,221 --> 00:30:25,849 - Let me explain. - Tom. 630 00:30:25,924 --> 00:30:27,585 Go to her. 631 00:30:35,366 --> 00:30:38,358 Tom, I'll need a ride home. 632 00:30:41,506 --> 00:30:44,737 Hey, baby. How's it going? 633 00:30:44,809 --> 00:30:47,573 Oh, I'm dying, Tom. 634 00:30:47,645 --> 00:30:49,442 Don't talk like that. 635 00:30:49,514 --> 00:30:52,176 The truck barely hit you. 636 00:30:52,250 --> 00:30:54,309 [Coughs] Honey. 637 00:30:54,385 --> 00:30:56,910 Kiss me one last time. 638 00:30:59,757 --> 00:31:02,885 Promise me you'll never remarry. 639 00:31:02,961 --> 00:31:05,327 I promise. 640 00:31:05,396 --> 00:31:07,830 And no sex, either. 641 00:31:08,433 --> 00:31:10,731 I'm sorry. I didn't catch that. 642 00:31:10,802 --> 00:31:12,167 [Grunts] No sex. 643 00:31:12,237 --> 00:31:14,364 Honey, you're not speaking clearly. 644 00:31:14,439 --> 00:31:16,270 - Your injuries must be awful. - No sex. 645 00:31:16,341 --> 00:31:19,902 Oh, cruel fate to shroud my wife's dying words in mystery. 646 00:31:19,978 --> 00:31:21,912 - No sex! - Poor Annie. 647 00:31:21,980 --> 00:31:23,106 We hardly knew her. 648 00:31:23,181 --> 00:31:25,615 - She'll be missed terribly. - Oh, Jesus. 649 00:31:25,683 --> 00:31:27,548 That's right, honey. Go into the light. 650 00:31:27,619 --> 00:31:28,711 Look! 651 00:31:28,786 --> 00:31:31,584 Just tell George, swing away. 652 00:31:31,656 --> 00:31:33,487 Right. Swing away. 653 00:31:33,558 --> 00:31:36,118 Oh, sure. That you understand. 654 00:31:36,194 --> 00:31:38,219 [Gasps] 655 00:31:38,296 --> 00:31:40,787 Annie? Annie! 656 00:31:42,500 --> 00:31:44,434 I'm sorry, dude. 657 00:31:44,502 --> 00:31:46,129 Don't call me dude. 658 00:31:46,204 --> 00:31:48,638 I'm not a stoner anymore. Not since... 659 00:31:48,706 --> 00:31:50,765 ["Mexican Hat Dance" plays] 660 00:31:50,842 --> 00:31:52,434 Goodbye, Tom. 661 00:31:54,012 --> 00:31:55,479 [Tires screech] 662 00:31:55,546 --> 00:31:58,310 [Sheep bleating, crash] 663 00:31:58,383 --> 00:32:00,044 [Horn blaring] 664 00:32:00,118 --> 00:32:06,546 Amazing grace 665 00:32:06,624 --> 00:32:08,683 How sweet... 666 00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:11,194 I'm so sorry, Mr. and Mrs. Meeks. 667 00:32:11,262 --> 00:32:14,026 Brenda was a good friend when she was alive. 668 00:32:14,098 --> 00:32:16,225 [Crying] My sweet, sweet Brenda. 669 00:32:16,301 --> 00:32:18,531 She looks so peaceful. 670 00:32:18,603 --> 00:32:20,161 Oh... 671 00:32:23,007 --> 00:32:26,738 If only God had taken us instead of our daughter. 672 00:32:26,811 --> 00:32:29,279 And knowing your Brenda like I did, 673 00:32:29,347 --> 00:32:31,838 I'd say she wishes the same thing. 674 00:32:33,084 --> 00:32:35,177 These just came today. 675 00:32:35,253 --> 00:32:37,915 Photos from a trip she took. 676 00:32:41,392 --> 00:32:42,381 They're blank. 677 00:32:42,460 --> 00:32:44,985 Turn them around, honey. 678 00:32:45,063 --> 00:32:46,257 Oh. 679 00:32:46,331 --> 00:32:48,561 Yes, of course. 680 00:32:48,633 --> 00:32:49,759 Who's this? 681 00:32:49,834 --> 00:32:52,860 That's Ralph. He's right over there. 682 00:32:58,843 --> 00:32:59,832 Cody? 683 00:32:59,911 --> 00:33:03,711 It's a boy. He's going to be an asshole. 684 00:33:03,781 --> 00:33:07,239 Smoke all you want. You're gonna get hit by a bus. 685 00:33:07,318 --> 00:33:10,287 That's not fooling anyone. 686 00:33:11,923 --> 00:33:13,015 Cindy. 687 00:33:13,091 --> 00:33:14,422 - George. - Hey. 688 00:33:14,492 --> 00:33:17,290 Sue wanted to pay her respects to her teacher. 689 00:33:18,129 --> 00:33:19,221 You? 690 00:33:19,297 --> 00:33:20,696 Brenda was my bitch. 691 00:33:20,765 --> 00:33:21,789 Of course. 692 00:33:23,368 --> 00:33:24,858 Hmm. 693 00:33:24,936 --> 00:33:26,028 Are you okay? 694 00:33:26,104 --> 00:33:28,629 It's just the open coffin. 695 00:33:28,706 --> 00:33:30,799 I can't believe they leave it out here like this. 696 00:33:30,875 --> 00:33:32,866 - George, it's a wake! - Awake?! 697 00:33:32,944 --> 00:33:35,037 - Brenda! It's a miracle! - No! George, stop! 698 00:33:35,113 --> 00:33:36,444 I thought you were dead! 699 00:33:36,514 --> 00:33:39,745 Sue, your teacher's alive! Hello?! 700 00:33:39,817 --> 00:33:43,014 I got your back, George! I got your back! 701 00:33:43,087 --> 00:33:44,076 She's alive! 702 00:33:44,155 --> 00:33:45,622 I'll tell you what! 703 00:33:45,690 --> 00:33:47,681 - Oh! - [Crowd gasping] 704 00:33:49,227 --> 00:33:51,218 GEORGE: Mahalik! She's alive! Brenda! 705 00:33:51,295 --> 00:33:52,557 George, stop! She's dead! 706 00:33:52,630 --> 00:33:54,222 No! We won't lose you again! 707 00:33:54,298 --> 00:33:56,630 Mahalik, help! 708 00:33:56,701 --> 00:33:57,895 Nothing! 709 00:33:57,969 --> 00:33:59,994 - Ooh! - [Screams] 710 00:34:01,039 --> 00:34:02,506 She's not breathing! 711 00:34:02,573 --> 00:34:03,437 No! 712 00:34:03,508 --> 00:34:05,601 Live, damn it! Live! 713 00:34:06,878 --> 00:34:08,778 Live, damn it! Live! 714 00:34:10,248 --> 00:34:11,806 Let me open her windpipe! 715 00:34:11,883 --> 00:34:13,942 MRS. MEEKS: No! Oh, God! 716 00:34:14,018 --> 00:34:15,485 Charles! Charles, stop them! 717 00:34:15,553 --> 00:34:17,350 Breathe! 718 00:34:19,424 --> 00:34:22,154 Someone stop them! What are they doing?! 719 00:34:22,226 --> 00:34:23,818 Get up! 720 00:34:23,895 --> 00:34:25,954 She's alive! She's alive! 721 00:34:26,030 --> 00:34:28,828 Wake up! Breathe! 722 00:34:28,900 --> 00:34:31,266 [All shouting] 723 00:34:38,009 --> 00:34:40,705 - Charles! Charles! - Clear! 724 00:34:40,778 --> 00:34:42,803 No! 725 00:34:44,749 --> 00:34:47,217 Aah! 726 00:34:47,285 --> 00:34:49,344 I got something! I got something! 727 00:34:49,420 --> 00:34:52,651 [Gasps, screams] 728 00:34:55,326 --> 00:34:56,793 Aah! 729 00:34:56,861 --> 00:34:58,158 - That's it! - George! 730 00:34:58,229 --> 00:35:01,096 That's the last time I try to bring anyone back from the dead. 731 00:35:01,165 --> 00:35:03,224 George, don't get down on yourself. 732 00:35:03,301 --> 00:35:05,235 I know you were only trying to help. 733 00:35:05,303 --> 00:35:08,363 You're a good, caring person. 734 00:35:08,439 --> 00:35:10,634 Which is why I like you. 735 00:35:10,708 --> 00:35:12,039 Oh, thanks, Cindy. 736 00:35:12,110 --> 00:35:14,305 But I don't want to screw your life up, too. 737 00:35:14,378 --> 00:35:16,369 The most caring thing I could do for everyone right now 738 00:35:16,447 --> 00:35:18,039 is to just get out of here. 739 00:35:18,116 --> 00:35:21,142 George! What about Sue? 740 00:35:21,919 --> 00:35:24,114 Oh, yes. Of course. 741 00:35:24,188 --> 00:35:25,951 Once I get Sue, then... 742 00:35:26,023 --> 00:35:27,217 Wait! 743 00:35:29,193 --> 00:35:32,094 I could really use a friend right now. 744 00:35:34,832 --> 00:35:38,324 Brenda's gone. Cody resents me. 745 00:35:39,237 --> 00:35:42,365 And I'm caught up in something I can't even... 746 00:35:42,440 --> 00:35:44,601 Oh, God, it's so hard! 747 00:35:44,675 --> 00:35:49,169 Well, you're beautiful and you're pressing up against me. 748 00:35:50,648 --> 00:35:53,116 Look, Cindy. 749 00:35:53,184 --> 00:35:56,051 I know you'd never consider going out with a guy like me. 750 00:35:56,120 --> 00:36:00,489 But if you're not too busy tomorrow night... 751 00:36:02,426 --> 00:36:04,656 Is that a yes? 752 00:36:04,729 --> 00:36:06,094 Yes. 753 00:36:11,536 --> 00:36:15,302 Cindy, did Brenda ever talk to you about a tape? 754 00:36:15,373 --> 00:36:17,273 She did mention something. 755 00:36:17,341 --> 00:36:19,571 Do you mind if I go upstairs and look around? 756 00:36:19,644 --> 00:36:21,908 Yes, go. Of course. Go. 757 00:36:21,979 --> 00:36:25,073 Cody, I'll be right back, okay? 758 00:36:25,149 --> 00:36:27,344 You're getting lucky tonight. 759 00:36:27,418 --> 00:36:29,943 He doesn't know you're a guy. 760 00:36:30,021 --> 00:36:32,512 [Thunder crashes] 761 00:37:27,411 --> 00:37:29,003 [Thud] 762 00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:31,241 Oh, shit. 763 00:37:31,315 --> 00:37:32,475 [Splash] 764 00:37:42,960 --> 00:37:44,860 [Stammering] 765 00:37:44,929 --> 00:37:46,954 [Vomiting] 766 00:37:47,932 --> 00:37:49,456 [Growls] 767 00:37:57,141 --> 00:37:59,166 [Telephone ringing] 768 00:38:10,621 --> 00:38:12,111 Hello? 769 00:38:12,189 --> 00:38:13,622 [Man speaking indistinctly] 770 00:38:13,691 --> 00:38:16,125 What? Willie Mays? 771 00:38:16,193 --> 00:38:17,626 [Mumbling] 772 00:38:17,695 --> 00:38:19,629 Who's gay? Hello? 773 00:38:19,697 --> 00:38:21,392 [Mumbling] 774 00:38:21,465 --> 00:38:22,454 What? 775 00:38:22,533 --> 00:38:23,966 Can you hear me now? 776 00:38:24,035 --> 00:38:25,127 Kind of. 777 00:38:25,202 --> 00:38:27,136 - Can you hear me now? - Yes. Perfect. 778 00:38:27,204 --> 00:38:28,466 Seven days. 779 00:38:28,539 --> 00:38:29,972 Seven days. 780 00:38:30,041 --> 00:38:31,975 Oh, my God. I'm gonna die next Monday? 781 00:38:32,043 --> 00:38:33,305 Yes. No. Wait. 782 00:38:33,377 --> 00:38:35,641 Monday. That would be seven business days. 783 00:38:35,713 --> 00:38:37,647 This is seven days starting now. 784 00:38:37,715 --> 00:38:40,479 So seven days to this very hour? My watch broke. 785 00:38:40,551 --> 00:38:41,984 How am I gonna know the exact hour? 786 00:38:42,053 --> 00:38:44,647 Forget hours. This day seven days from now. 787 00:38:44,722 --> 00:38:47,418 But there's a holiday coming up. Do you count the holiday? 788 00:38:47,491 --> 00:38:49,322 Well, that depends. What holiday? 789 00:38:49,393 --> 00:38:51,486 - Martin Luther King Day. - Then no. 790 00:38:51,562 --> 00:38:53,826 Why not? Everybody at work is taking it off. 791 00:38:53,898 --> 00:38:56,162 Jesus Christ, lady. I'm giving you seven friggin' days. 792 00:38:56,233 --> 00:38:58,724 I can come over now and kill the shit out of you if you'd rather. 793 00:38:58,803 --> 00:39:01,135 [Click, dial tone] 794 00:39:03,174 --> 00:39:05,199 Yo, George, I don't care what you say, man. 795 00:39:05,276 --> 00:39:07,141 I'm signing you up for another rap battle. 796 00:39:07,211 --> 00:39:09,611 Mahalik, I told you. That part of my life is over. 797 00:39:09,680 --> 00:39:11,944 I said the same thing about getting with C.J.'s sister. 798 00:39:12,016 --> 00:39:14,610 - I'm still hitting that. - He's still hitting it, man! 799 00:39:14,685 --> 00:39:16,949 And she fine as shit! That's my sister! What? 800 00:39:17,021 --> 00:39:18,386 It doesn't matter. I'm done. 801 00:39:18,456 --> 00:39:20,947 - So what are you gonna do? - I don't know. 802 00:39:21,025 --> 00:39:22,993 [Laughs] 803 00:39:23,060 --> 00:39:25,722 Yeah! Yeah! A-come on! 804 00:39:25,796 --> 00:39:28,822 Maybe my brother was right. Maybe I should just settle down. 805 00:39:28,899 --> 00:39:30,958 [Laughing] 806 00:39:31,035 --> 00:39:32,400 - What's up, then?! - Mother... 807 00:39:32,470 --> 00:39:33,630 I got another one, y'all. 808 00:39:33,704 --> 00:39:37,140 Yo, George, man, you can't focus on that shit, man. 809 00:39:37,208 --> 00:39:39,403 - Let that go. - [Laughing] 810 00:39:39,477 --> 00:39:42,503 Hey, you got to try this shit, George. 811 00:39:43,481 --> 00:39:44,948 Ow! 812 00:39:46,584 --> 00:39:48,245 Yo, man, you got to take the lid off! 813 00:39:48,319 --> 00:39:50,753 - Oh, yes. Of course. - Sorry! 814 00:39:50,821 --> 00:39:52,482 [Cellphone rings] 815 00:39:52,556 --> 00:39:53,147 Hello? 816 00:39:53,224 --> 00:39:56,022 CIND Y: George, something terrible has happened! 817 00:39:57,228 --> 00:39:58,217 [Gasps] 818 00:39:58,295 --> 00:39:59,922 Cindy, are you okay? What's going on? 819 00:39:59,997 --> 00:40:01,965 George, you have to help me. 820 00:40:02,032 --> 00:40:04,500 I just watched the same tape that killed Brenda. 821 00:40:04,568 --> 00:40:08,004 Then the phone rang, and this voice said I was gonna die. 822 00:40:08,072 --> 00:40:10,666 Cindy, there's no such thing as a killer videotape. 823 00:40:10,741 --> 00:40:12,265 - Oh. - Hell, yeah, there is! 824 00:40:12,343 --> 00:40:14,106 I know somebody who can help you. 825 00:40:14,178 --> 00:40:15,668 - You do? Who? - Wait up, man. 826 00:40:15,746 --> 00:40:18,715 I heard Jamal from 90th street watched that tape last week. 827 00:40:18,783 --> 00:40:20,182 This morning he woke up dead. 828 00:40:20,251 --> 00:40:21,980 How in the hell do you wake up dead? 829 00:40:22,052 --> 00:40:23,952 'Cause you're alive when you go to sleep. 830 00:40:24,021 --> 00:40:26,888 You're telling me you can go to bed dead and wake up alive? 831 00:40:26,957 --> 00:40:28,515 MAHALIK: You can't go to bed dead! 832 00:40:28,592 --> 00:40:30,856 - That shit would be redundant. - No, it wouldn't. 833 00:40:30,928 --> 00:40:33,055 'Cause you can go to bed and not be dead. 834 00:40:33,130 --> 00:40:34,825 And you can die but not be in a bed. 835 00:40:34,899 --> 00:40:36,161 But you are in a bed, man. 836 00:40:36,233 --> 00:40:38,599 That's how you wake up dead in the first place! 837 00:40:38,669 --> 00:40:41,570 Damn! That's some quantum shit right there, man! 838 00:40:41,639 --> 00:40:43,834 You should be teaching classes! 839 00:40:43,908 --> 00:40:46,172 - Just tell me who can help me! - Damn! 840 00:40:46,243 --> 00:40:47,141 My Aunt ShaNeequa. 841 00:40:47,211 --> 00:40:49,042 Her and her man into this weird shit. 842 00:40:49,113 --> 00:40:51,741 They saw the tape before anybody else knew about it. 843 00:40:51,816 --> 00:40:54,785 - Go see them tonight. - Tonight? Yeah. 844 00:40:54,852 --> 00:40:57,184 But who will take care of Cody? 845 00:40:58,656 --> 00:41:00,715 COD Y: George, we're gonna have so much fun. 846 00:41:00,791 --> 00:41:02,656 I have some puzzles and board games 847 00:41:02,726 --> 00:41:04,318 and baseball cards in my room 848 00:41:04,395 --> 00:41:05,987 and this really cool model airplane. 849 00:41:06,063 --> 00:41:07,496 - I'm gonna go get it. - Sure. 850 00:41:07,565 --> 00:41:09,055 Okay, so I made him a snack. 851 00:41:09,133 --> 00:41:11,829 You can give him some warm milk if he can't go to sleep. 852 00:41:11,902 --> 00:41:13,699 - Everything's gonna be fine. - Here it is. 853 00:41:13,771 --> 00:41:16,205 I'm great with kids. Heads up, Cody. 854 00:41:16,273 --> 00:41:18,104 Ugh! 855 00:41:18,175 --> 00:41:21,042 - Oh, I left some numbers. - I'm okay. 856 00:41:21,111 --> 00:41:22,510 Ugh! 857 00:41:22,580 --> 00:41:24,514 Sorry. You okay, kiddo? 858 00:41:24,582 --> 00:41:26,743 Thataboy. 859 00:41:28,652 --> 00:41:31,815 - [Tires screech, horn honks] - And I guess that's it. 860 00:41:31,889 --> 00:41:34,551 - Okay, I'm off. - Right. 861 00:41:34,625 --> 00:41:36,024 You know, it's funny. 862 00:41:36,093 --> 00:41:40,029 All a child ever really wants is a family. 863 00:41:40,097 --> 00:41:41,359 Yo. 864 00:41:42,166 --> 00:41:43,531 Cody really likes you. 865 00:41:43,601 --> 00:41:44,932 Oh, he's a good kid. 866 00:41:45,002 --> 00:41:46,435 Yeah. 867 00:41:46,504 --> 00:41:48,938 Oh! 868 00:41:49,006 --> 00:41:50,906 - Bye. - Bye. 869 00:41:51,976 --> 00:41:54,342 - [Door closes] - [Exhales deeply] 870 00:42:06,590 --> 00:42:08,319 Hello? 871 00:42:08,392 --> 00:42:09,620 I know. 872 00:42:09,693 --> 00:42:12,560 You're Cindy. Be right with you. 873 00:42:12,630 --> 00:42:14,291 Aunt ShaNeequa? 874 00:42:14,365 --> 00:42:16,856 Bingo. 875 00:42:16,934 --> 00:42:18,765 But you can call me the Oracle. 876 00:42:18,836 --> 00:42:20,394 And don't worry about that vase. 877 00:42:20,471 --> 00:42:22,996 What vase? Oh! Sorry. I didn't know. 878 00:42:23,073 --> 00:42:25,337 Oh! Aah! 879 00:42:25,409 --> 00:42:27,673 That vase. 880 00:42:28,679 --> 00:42:30,613 Please, sit. 881 00:42:33,284 --> 00:42:34,273 [Farts] 882 00:42:35,819 --> 00:42:38,253 It was the chair. 883 00:42:38,322 --> 00:42:39,516 Mmm. 884 00:42:39,590 --> 00:42:44,391 [Farting loudly] 885 00:42:44,461 --> 00:42:46,395 Yes, the chair. 886 00:42:47,231 --> 00:42:48,960 I know why you've come. 887 00:42:49,033 --> 00:42:51,797 A great mystery lies ahead of you, 888 00:42:51,869 --> 00:42:54,531 but you must not shy away from the challenge. 889 00:42:54,605 --> 00:42:56,937 - Only you can be the one... - [Door opens] 890 00:42:57,007 --> 00:42:58,668 [Volume on TV increases] 891 00:42:58,742 --> 00:43:00,141 - Orpheus? - What, baby? 892 00:43:00,210 --> 00:43:02,041 Sweetie? 893 00:43:02,112 --> 00:43:04,046 I'm watching the game. 894 00:43:05,649 --> 00:43:06,980 Do you mind? 895 00:43:09,320 --> 00:43:11,515 The Lakers will win by 12. 896 00:43:13,691 --> 00:43:16,387 - So can you tell me about... - The tape? 897 00:43:16,460 --> 00:43:19,987 - Yes. I watched it and... - The phone rang. 898 00:43:20,064 --> 00:43:23,830 - Right. Then this voice said... - That you would die. 899 00:43:23,901 --> 00:43:26,392 - Okay, that's getting... - Extremely annoying. 900 00:43:26,470 --> 00:43:27,402 Yeah. 901 00:43:27,471 --> 00:43:29,166 Try being married to her. 902 00:43:29,239 --> 00:43:32,800 I catch shit about women I ain't slept with yet. 903 00:43:34,078 --> 00:43:35,909 You made a copy of the tape. Let's see it. 904 00:43:35,980 --> 00:43:37,880 Yes. Okay. 905 00:43:44,254 --> 00:43:45,721 ShaNeequa, can you tell me if... 906 00:43:45,789 --> 00:43:48,519 The tape is connected to the crop circles and the aliens? 907 00:43:48,592 --> 00:43:53,723 Yes. But it's up to you to discover how for yourself. 908 00:43:53,797 --> 00:43:54,991 Look, it's a... 909 00:43:55,065 --> 00:43:56,828 SHANEEQU A: Cigarette? 910 00:43:56,900 --> 00:43:59,664 I was going to say lighthouse. 911 00:44:00,471 --> 00:44:03,463 ORPHEUS: Find that lighthouse. It's your destiny. 912 00:44:05,476 --> 00:44:06,443 Wait. 913 00:44:06,510 --> 00:44:08,375 What is that? 914 00:44:12,850 --> 00:44:14,750 Oh, my God. 915 00:44:15,719 --> 00:44:17,277 [Fly buzzes] 916 00:44:33,604 --> 00:44:35,902 There we go. Ugh! 917 00:44:37,441 --> 00:44:39,204 Now, baby. 918 00:44:39,777 --> 00:44:41,938 I knew that was gonna happen. 919 00:44:42,012 --> 00:44:44,037 Uh-oh. Come on. 920 00:44:44,114 --> 00:44:45,706 [Whistling] 921 00:44:45,783 --> 00:44:46,807 SHANEEQU A: Oh, hell, no. 922 00:44:46,884 --> 00:44:50,217 Get your ass out of the TV! What's wrong with you? 923 00:44:50,287 --> 00:44:52,050 I'm gonna teach you! 924 00:44:52,122 --> 00:44:53,521 Get out of that TV! 925 00:44:53,590 --> 00:44:55,922 Baby, no! No! Let her go! Let her go! 926 00:44:55,993 --> 00:44:58,359 Let her go! We gonna get another lawsuit. 927 00:44:58,429 --> 00:45:00,488 She spit on me. I'm gonna kill the bitch. 928 00:45:00,564 --> 00:45:01,622 Ah! 929 00:45:01,699 --> 00:45:02,927 You won. You won. 930 00:45:03,000 --> 00:45:04,627 You won. You won. 931 00:45:04,702 --> 00:45:06,135 - Upstairs. - Okay. 932 00:45:06,203 --> 00:45:07,397 - Down low. - Okay. 933 00:45:07,471 --> 00:45:08,938 - All right. - Baby, no! 934 00:45:09,006 --> 00:45:12,134 - Kill her! Is you crazy? - Baby! 935 00:45:12,209 --> 00:45:14,609 [Laughs] What you gonna brush now? 936 00:45:14,678 --> 00:45:16,145 What you gonna brush now, huh? 937 00:45:16,213 --> 00:45:17,237 Come on, baby! 938 00:45:17,314 --> 00:45:20,215 You picked the wrong TV to come out of. 939 00:45:25,022 --> 00:45:27,718 George? Cody? 940 00:45:27,791 --> 00:45:29,349 Oh! 941 00:45:30,427 --> 00:45:32,122 George? 942 00:45:32,196 --> 00:45:34,391 - Ow! - What happened? 943 00:45:34,465 --> 00:45:35,932 I don't know. 944 00:45:35,999 --> 00:45:38,160 Cody and I were playing a fun game, 945 00:45:38,235 --> 00:45:39,759 and then I looked down. 946 00:45:39,837 --> 00:45:42,067 [Gasps] Yahtzee! 947 00:45:48,746 --> 00:45:50,407 No! 948 00:45:51,648 --> 00:45:53,240 Oh, my God! 949 00:45:53,617 --> 00:45:55,209 How could you let him watch the tape? 950 00:45:55,285 --> 00:45:56,877 [Telephone ringing] 951 00:46:04,528 --> 00:46:05,790 Hello? 952 00:46:05,863 --> 00:46:09,629 - MAN: It's me. How you doing? - Fine. 953 00:46:09,700 --> 00:46:12,635 Enjoying your last week? I can't wait to see you. 954 00:46:12,703 --> 00:46:15,797 - Six days now, right? - Yeah. 955 00:46:15,873 --> 00:46:18,273 It was great catching up. Can I speak to Cody? 956 00:46:18,342 --> 00:46:20,640 Why? He didn't watch the tape. 957 00:46:20,711 --> 00:46:23,646 Yes, he did. Come on, Cindy, I do this for a living. 958 00:46:23,714 --> 00:46:25,614 Leave us alone! 959 00:46:26,383 --> 00:46:27,816 [Rings] 960 00:46:30,721 --> 00:46:31,619 Hello? 961 00:46:31,688 --> 00:46:33,451 Hello, I'm calling from "Reader's Digest" 962 00:46:33,524 --> 00:46:35,151 with a fantastic offer for Cody. 963 00:46:35,225 --> 00:46:36,852 - [Snickering] - Aah! 964 00:46:36,927 --> 00:46:39,828 No, you're not! You're that evil little girl from the tape! 965 00:46:39,897 --> 00:46:41,728 [Laughs] Okay, you got me. 966 00:46:41,799 --> 00:46:43,630 How about I just leave a message for him? 967 00:46:43,700 --> 00:46:45,361 Fine. 968 00:46:46,370 --> 00:46:48,167 Uh-huh. 969 00:46:48,238 --> 00:46:51,765 Yeah. Okay, how do you spell that? 970 00:46:51,842 --> 00:46:52,774 Right. 971 00:46:52,843 --> 00:46:56,074 Okay, got it. Bye-bye. 972 00:46:58,749 --> 00:47:01,217 Aaaah! 973 00:47:01,852 --> 00:47:03,444 I can't believe you let that happen. 974 00:47:03,520 --> 00:47:04,953 I know. I'm sorry. I screwed up. 975 00:47:05,022 --> 00:47:07,013 Listen, we can still save him. 976 00:47:07,090 --> 00:47:09,115 The answer to the tape, to your crop circles, 977 00:47:09,193 --> 00:47:10,888 is at a lighthouse. 978 00:47:10,961 --> 00:47:12,758 Oh, you think I'm crazy, don't you? 979 00:47:12,830 --> 00:47:13,762 Of course I do. 980 00:47:13,831 --> 00:47:16,994 But the last thing you need now is a screw-up like me. 981 00:47:17,067 --> 00:47:18,762 I'm gonna leave for good. 982 00:47:18,836 --> 00:47:20,098 Wait. 983 00:47:21,872 --> 00:47:25,535 Well, what should I tell Cody? 984 00:47:25,609 --> 00:47:26,633 Let him down easy. 985 00:47:26,710 --> 00:47:28,769 Tell him I got called away on business. 986 00:47:28,846 --> 00:47:30,575 You'll think of something. 987 00:47:30,647 --> 00:47:33,207 Testicular cancer. He won't ask questions. 988 00:47:33,283 --> 00:47:35,046 I knew you'd understand. 989 00:47:35,118 --> 00:47:36,312 George! 990 00:47:36,386 --> 00:47:38,081 Just... 991 00:47:38,155 --> 00:47:39,918 be careful. 992 00:47:39,990 --> 00:47:42,550 Something weird is going on at your farm. I know it. 993 00:47:42,626 --> 00:47:43,888 I don't know. 994 00:47:43,961 --> 00:47:46,225 Sometimes a sheep needs pushed through the fence. 995 00:47:46,296 --> 00:47:48,560 - What? - Goodbye, Cindy. 996 00:47:50,567 --> 00:47:52,728 [Girl chanting] 997 00:48:13,323 --> 00:48:16,417 - Sue? - I can't sleep. 998 00:48:16,493 --> 00:48:19,621 Well, it's way past your bedtime. 999 00:48:21,598 --> 00:48:25,694 Won't you rock me to sleep in your big, strong arms? 1000 00:48:27,337 --> 00:48:30,238 There's plenty of room under the covers. 1001 00:48:30,307 --> 00:48:32,332 It's a hot night. 1002 00:48:32,409 --> 00:48:34,843 You don't need to wear pajamas. 1003 00:48:36,713 --> 00:48:37,805 Where is my daughter? 1004 00:48:37,881 --> 00:48:40,372 Are you mad? I am your daughter. 1005 00:48:40,450 --> 00:48:42,042 No, you're not! 1006 00:48:42,119 --> 00:48:43,051 Aaaah! 1007 00:48:43,120 --> 00:48:44,314 Aah! 1008 00:48:44,388 --> 00:48:47,289 Come here! What did you do with Sue? 1009 00:48:47,357 --> 00:48:48,847 I didn't touch her. I swear. 1010 00:48:48,926 --> 00:48:50,120 I don't believe you! 1011 00:48:50,193 --> 00:48:52,661 Please! For God's sake, she's a girl! 1012 00:48:52,729 --> 00:48:54,594 You sick... 1013 00:48:55,565 --> 00:48:56,725 Oh! 1014 00:49:08,578 --> 00:49:09,806 [Giggles] 1015 00:49:14,084 --> 00:49:16,416 - Aah! - Daddy! 1016 00:49:16,486 --> 00:49:18,681 How do you like it, huh? 1017 00:49:18,755 --> 00:49:20,746 Having fun? 1018 00:49:20,824 --> 00:49:21,984 Aaah! 1019 00:49:22,059 --> 00:49:23,390 [Thud] 1020 00:49:37,040 --> 00:49:39,600 Tom, are you... 1021 00:49:40,510 --> 00:49:41,977 What in the world? 1022 00:49:42,045 --> 00:49:43,273 Shh! 1023 00:49:45,048 --> 00:49:47,039 Look. 1024 00:49:47,117 --> 00:49:49,051 What is that thing? 1025 00:49:49,119 --> 00:49:51,178 I don't know. 1026 00:49:51,254 --> 00:49:54,121 Maybe Cindy was right. 1027 00:50:09,339 --> 00:50:11,864 Please, sir. All I need is five minutes. 1028 00:50:11,942 --> 00:50:15,207 And I told you, Campbell, no more paranoid on-air rants 1029 00:50:15,278 --> 00:50:17,838 - about the supernatural. - I know. 1030 00:50:17,914 --> 00:50:20,348 This station is about sex, violence, and the weather. 1031 00:50:20,417 --> 00:50:22,009 Yes. That reminds me. 1032 00:50:22,085 --> 00:50:25,020 We're gonna need that "Porn Star Shot Dead in a Hurricane" story. 1033 00:50:25,088 --> 00:50:26,612 One hour. 1034 00:50:26,690 --> 00:50:29,158 GIGGINS: Meanwhile, a tornado in Charleston 1035 00:50:29,226 --> 00:50:31,820 threatens a clothing-optional beach where just yesterday 1036 00:50:31,895 --> 00:50:34,295 a naked couple was brutally murdered. 1037 00:50:34,364 --> 00:50:37,128 This just five miles from where the last naked couple 1038 00:50:37,200 --> 00:50:38,599 was brutally murdered. 1039 00:50:38,668 --> 00:50:40,499 Turning now to sports. 1040 00:50:40,570 --> 00:50:42,561 And an evil videotape 1041 00:50:42,639 --> 00:50:45,767 that kills anyone who watches it in seven days. 1042 00:50:45,842 --> 00:50:48,242 It's true. We're all in danger. 1043 00:50:48,311 --> 00:50:49,903 - There's an alien force - Oh, no. 1044 00:50:49,980 --> 00:50:52,312 that's trying prevent you from knowing the truth. 1045 00:50:52,382 --> 00:50:53,542 Campbell, are you insane? 1046 00:50:53,617 --> 00:50:54,675 It's a horrible fate. 1047 00:50:54,751 --> 00:50:55,911 Carson, I have to do this. 1048 00:50:55,986 --> 00:50:58,045 Correction, there really is no danger. 1049 00:50:58,121 --> 00:51:00,817 Actually, I didn't really mean anything I just said. 1050 00:51:00,891 --> 00:51:03,485 Yes, I did. Every word of it. 1051 00:51:03,560 --> 00:51:05,994 Everyone watching this could be dead in a week. 1052 00:51:06,063 --> 00:51:07,530 Oh, shizl gzngahr. 1053 00:51:07,597 --> 00:51:09,588 [Blabbering] 1054 00:51:16,506 --> 00:51:20,465 469. I been cleaning after this dumb-ass cracker Giggins 1055 00:51:20,544 --> 00:51:21,533 for 10 years. 1056 00:51:21,611 --> 00:51:24,273 But I been hitting it with his woman for 12. 1057 00:51:24,347 --> 00:51:25,814 Know what I'm saying, nigga? 1058 00:51:25,882 --> 00:51:27,611 She likes her some chocolate. 1059 00:51:27,684 --> 00:51:30,619 Sharpton for president, y'all. I'm outie. 1060 00:51:30,687 --> 00:51:32,279 Peace. 1061 00:51:32,355 --> 00:51:35,813 HARRIS: An evil videotape that kills people in 7 days. 1062 00:51:35,892 --> 00:51:37,689 Alien forces threatening the world. 1063 00:51:37,761 --> 00:51:39,626 And who the hell is this Cindy Campbell? 1064 00:51:39,696 --> 00:51:42,563 If what she says is true, we're facing an unprecedented crisis. 1065 00:51:42,632 --> 00:51:43,656 Get me the president. 1066 00:51:43,733 --> 00:51:44,859 You are the president. 1067 00:51:44,935 --> 00:51:47,301 Good. Then I already know about this. 1068 00:51:47,370 --> 00:51:48,530 Let's order lunch. 1069 00:51:48,605 --> 00:51:51,199 Sir, I think you need to go on TV 1070 00:51:51,274 --> 00:51:54,903 and convince the people that there is no such thing as a UFO. 1071 00:51:54,978 --> 00:51:56,912 Don't spell in front of me, damn it. 1072 00:51:56,980 --> 00:51:58,311 Aliens, sir. 1073 00:51:58,381 --> 00:52:00,508 There's no such thing as aliens. 1074 00:52:00,584 --> 00:52:02,484 - That's not quite true. - Sir? 1075 00:52:02,552 --> 00:52:05,578 A year ago, a UFO crash-landed in New Mexico. 1076 00:52:05,655 --> 00:52:08,647 - A body may have been recovered. - "May have been"? 1077 00:52:08,725 --> 00:52:11,489 Well, there was a terrible mix-up. 1078 00:52:11,561 --> 00:52:13,358 It was Thanksgiving. 1079 00:52:13,430 --> 00:52:15,830 The body was sent down to the kitchen. 1080 00:52:15,899 --> 00:52:19,733 They shoved stuffing up its ass, and we ate it at a state dinner. 1081 00:52:19,803 --> 00:52:21,430 That's the last I saw of it. 1082 00:52:21,505 --> 00:52:22,836 No, scratch that. 1083 00:52:22,906 --> 00:52:24,965 There were some sandwiches made the next day. 1084 00:52:25,041 --> 00:52:26,167 Mr. President! 1085 00:52:26,243 --> 00:52:27,835 - Listen to me. - Agent Thompson! 1086 00:52:27,911 --> 00:52:29,208 Back away from that window! 1087 00:52:29,279 --> 00:52:32,009 What? Did I forget to put my pants on again? 1088 00:52:32,082 --> 00:52:34,016 No, sir. It's just a feeling I've been having 1089 00:52:34,084 --> 00:52:35,745 since the news about the aliens. 1090 00:52:35,819 --> 00:52:37,980 - Something's not right. - I know what you mean. 1091 00:52:38,054 --> 00:52:41,114 It's like that feeling that something's not right. 1092 00:52:42,259 --> 00:52:44,193 What is it? 1093 00:52:44,261 --> 00:52:46,354 Some old Tupac, sir. 1094 00:52:46,429 --> 00:52:48,454 [Hip-hop music plays] 1095 00:52:48,532 --> 00:52:53,128 "All eyez on me." Hey, this shit is banging. 1096 00:52:53,203 --> 00:52:55,763 Thank you, sir. I appreciate it. 1097 00:53:25,068 --> 00:53:27,059 - [Air horn blows] - Oh! 1098 00:54:09,713 --> 00:54:11,874 Hello, Cindy. 1099 00:54:14,117 --> 00:54:16,608 I am the Architect. 1100 00:54:16,686 --> 00:54:18,017 You have many questions. 1101 00:54:18,088 --> 00:54:20,921 ["Jeopardy!" theme plays] 1102 00:54:20,991 --> 00:54:23,892 I've been watching you for a very long time. 1103 00:54:25,428 --> 00:54:26,793 So I see. 1104 00:54:26,863 --> 00:54:29,730 What is the connection between the crop circles and the tape? 1105 00:54:29,799 --> 00:54:30,959 The answer is simple. 1106 00:54:31,034 --> 00:54:33,400 You are the eventuality of an anomaly. 1107 00:54:33,470 --> 00:54:36,030 You are inexorably seeking a sedulant probability. 1108 00:54:36,106 --> 00:54:37,164 Sedulant? 1109 00:54:37,240 --> 00:54:38,901 Grotesquerie? No? 1110 00:54:38,975 --> 00:54:41,170 What about contingent affirmation? 1111 00:54:41,244 --> 00:54:43,075 - That's got to mean something. - Hey! 1112 00:54:43,146 --> 00:54:47,173 Hey! You put cameras in my bathroom? 1113 00:54:47,250 --> 00:54:49,013 [Gasps] 1114 00:54:49,085 --> 00:54:50,677 What is this? 1115 00:54:50,754 --> 00:54:54,315 Oh, my God. Well, it was a long winter. 1116 00:54:54,391 --> 00:54:55,688 This is an invasion of... Ow! 1117 00:54:55,759 --> 00:54:57,056 Oh, sorry. 1118 00:54:57,127 --> 00:54:59,527 I can't help it. It's very lonely in here. 1119 00:54:59,596 --> 00:55:03,088 Ergo, I haven't been with anyone in a very long time, 1120 00:55:03,166 --> 00:55:04,758 not counting myself. 1121 00:55:04,834 --> 00:55:07,268 Or this chair. 1122 00:55:07,337 --> 00:55:09,635 I call her... 1123 00:55:09,706 --> 00:55:10,900 Linda. 1124 00:55:10,974 --> 00:55:13,499 Could you just cut to the chase? I'm kind of in a rush. 1125 00:55:13,576 --> 00:55:15,806 Why? You can always sleep over if you want. 1126 00:55:15,879 --> 00:55:17,938 Linda's built for two, and she vibrates. 1127 00:55:18,014 --> 00:55:20,005 Stop it! Just tell me what I need to know. 1128 00:55:20,083 --> 00:55:21,448 Who is that little girl? 1129 00:55:21,518 --> 00:55:23,418 Okay, okay. 1130 00:55:25,188 --> 00:55:28,589 My wife and I wanted a child, but she couldn't get pregnant. 1131 00:55:28,658 --> 00:55:30,592 Neither could I. 1132 00:55:30,660 --> 00:55:31,786 So you adopted. 1133 00:55:31,861 --> 00:55:34,329 We loved our daughter, but she was evil. 1134 00:55:34,397 --> 00:55:36,797 Made the horses crazy, killed our puppies, 1135 00:55:36,866 --> 00:55:37,833 hid the remote. 1136 00:55:37,901 --> 00:55:39,129 Really sick shit. 1137 00:55:39,202 --> 00:55:41,067 My wife took her to the old family farm 1138 00:55:41,137 --> 00:55:43,002 and drowned her in the well. 1139 00:55:43,073 --> 00:55:46,440 I felt a simple time-out would have been sufficient. 1140 00:55:46,509 --> 00:55:50,070 But Tabitha imprinted her evil on a videotape. 1141 00:55:50,146 --> 00:55:52,239 I never meant for it to get out, but... 1142 00:55:52,315 --> 00:55:53,873 But what? 1143 00:55:53,950 --> 00:55:56,510 I put it in the wrong box and returned it to Blockbuster, 1144 00:55:56,586 --> 00:55:58,451 instead of my copy of "Pootie Tang." 1145 00:55:58,521 --> 00:56:01,456 It's been circulating and killing ever since. 1146 00:56:01,524 --> 00:56:03,458 Just like "Pootie Tang." 1147 00:56:04,527 --> 00:56:06,324 But what does this have to do with aliens? 1148 00:56:06,396 --> 00:56:07,454 I don't know. 1149 00:56:07,530 --> 00:56:10,294 Perhaps Tabitha's summoning them to kill us all. 1150 00:56:10,367 --> 00:56:12,835 An alien invasion? 1151 00:56:12,902 --> 00:56:14,301 I have to warn the world. 1152 00:56:14,371 --> 00:56:17,238 It's already begun. You're too late. 1153 00:56:17,307 --> 00:56:19,002 Oh, my God. 1154 00:56:19,075 --> 00:56:22,340 But not too late to make an old man happy. 1155 00:56:23,246 --> 00:56:25,339 What? 1156 00:56:25,415 --> 00:56:28,179 And now reports of lights in the sky. 1157 00:56:28,251 --> 00:56:30,481 Glimpses of spacecraft. 1158 00:56:30,553 --> 00:56:34,649 Possible alien sightings being reported all over the world. 1159 00:56:34,724 --> 00:56:35,986 Are they aliens? 1160 00:56:36,059 --> 00:56:38,493 The first video images are coming in. 1161 00:56:38,561 --> 00:56:40,358 Disturbing home video tonight 1162 00:56:40,430 --> 00:56:42,864 from a ranch outside Sydney, Australia. 1163 00:56:42,932 --> 00:56:45,264 Watch very carefully now. 1164 00:56:45,335 --> 00:56:46,427 There it is. 1165 00:56:46,503 --> 00:56:47,800 Let's see that again. 1166 00:56:49,339 --> 00:56:51,102 Very, very disturbing. 1167 00:56:51,174 --> 00:56:54,541 And this just in from Sao Paulo, Brazil. 1168 00:56:57,046 --> 00:56:58,877 Let's see that again. 1169 00:57:03,787 --> 00:57:07,120 Very, very disturbing. 1170 00:57:07,190 --> 00:57:09,852 And this just in from South Texas. 1171 00:57:14,130 --> 00:57:15,859 Do they pose a threat? 1172 00:57:15,932 --> 00:57:17,524 Only one thing's for certain. 1173 00:57:17,600 --> 00:57:20,569 We are all going to be killed. 1174 00:57:20,637 --> 00:57:22,434 We have to board up the house. 1175 00:57:22,572 --> 00:57:24,597 HARRIS: Are you sure this is necessary, Wilson? 1176 00:57:24,674 --> 00:57:26,835 Having an awards ceremony at a time like this? 1177 00:57:26,910 --> 00:57:30,141 Yes, sir. Everything must appear business as usual. 1178 00:57:30,213 --> 00:57:33,114 The nation, while not yet panicked, is deeply disturbed. 1179 00:57:33,183 --> 00:57:34,810 Right. We can steer that course, 1180 00:57:34,884 --> 00:57:36,818 keeping everybody deeply disturbed. 1181 00:57:36,886 --> 00:57:38,148 We don't want a panic. 1182 00:57:38,221 --> 00:57:40,655 Very few presidents have faced a crisis like this. 1183 00:57:40,723 --> 00:57:43,624 I wonder what President Ford would've done. 1184 00:57:43,693 --> 00:57:45,627 Well, if the buck stops here... 1185 00:57:45,695 --> 00:57:47,663 the buck stops here. 1186 00:57:49,899 --> 00:57:52,732 Thank you all, and welcome to the White House. 1187 00:57:52,802 --> 00:57:55,430 The Mother Teresa Awards 1188 00:57:55,505 --> 00:57:57,530 recognize those who have overcome 1189 00:57:57,607 --> 00:57:59,939 the severest handicaps and disadvantages 1190 00:58:00,009 --> 00:58:02,204 to help others in their communities. 1191 00:58:02,278 --> 00:58:05,543 The young, the old. Black and white. 1192 00:58:05,615 --> 00:58:08,106 Our Native American friends. Hey, how are you? 1193 00:58:08,184 --> 00:58:10,948 [Chanting] Hey, how are you? Hey, how are you? 1194 00:58:11,020 --> 00:58:12,214 Hey, how are you? 1195 00:58:12,288 --> 00:58:15,621 Ah. Well, it is therefore my honor 1196 00:58:15,692 --> 00:58:20,561 to present each and every one of you with this symbol of merit. 1197 00:58:25,702 --> 00:58:27,795 The room is secure, Mr. President. 1198 00:58:27,871 --> 00:58:29,964 - Or is it? - Sir? 1199 00:58:30,039 --> 00:58:31,472 I've been thinking, Thompson. 1200 00:58:31,541 --> 00:58:33,975 What if the aliens could take over human bodies? 1201 00:58:34,043 --> 00:58:35,476 They'd look just like us. 1202 00:58:35,545 --> 00:58:36,807 Or almost. 1203 00:58:36,880 --> 00:58:38,313 I never thought of that, sir. 1204 00:58:38,381 --> 00:58:40,611 We should be on alert for anything suspicious. 1205 00:58:40,683 --> 00:58:42,082 They could be anywhere. 1206 00:58:42,151 --> 00:58:43,311 Even... 1207 00:58:43,386 --> 00:58:44,580 Right here. 1208 00:58:44,654 --> 00:58:45,746 My God. 1209 00:58:45,822 --> 00:58:47,653 We'd never see the attack coming. 1210 00:58:47,724 --> 00:58:51,057 - It's frightening, sir! - Don't panic. 1211 00:58:51,127 --> 00:58:54,722 We'll just move slowly toward the exit. 1212 00:58:55,798 --> 00:58:58,494 [Mechanized voice] At last we meet, Mr. President. 1213 00:58:58,568 --> 00:59:00,001 It's happening. I knew it. 1214 00:59:00,069 --> 00:59:01,434 You'll never take me alive! 1215 00:59:01,504 --> 00:59:02,664 Aaaah! 1216 00:59:02,739 --> 00:59:04,969 Ah! She's scrambling my brain! 1217 00:59:05,041 --> 00:59:06,338 I'll get her! 1218 00:59:07,710 --> 00:59:09,405 Aaah! 1219 00:59:09,479 --> 00:59:12,141 Oh, no, you don't! Not on my watch! 1220 00:59:12,215 --> 00:59:13,944 Good work, sir! 1221 00:59:15,652 --> 00:59:17,984 Good God! The small ones have metal teeth! 1222 00:59:18,054 --> 00:59:20,488 Jerry's kids, my ass! 1223 00:59:21,391 --> 00:59:23,188 WILSON: Mr. President! 1224 00:59:23,259 --> 00:59:26,160 Mr. President, have you gone completely insane? 1225 00:59:26,229 --> 00:59:27,753 Like a fox. 1226 00:59:27,830 --> 00:59:29,957 We got to talk to the person who saw this coming, 1227 00:59:30,033 --> 00:59:31,193 Cindy Campbell. 1228 00:59:31,267 --> 00:59:32,894 She knows how to defeat the aliens. 1229 00:59:32,969 --> 00:59:35,096 - Filthy, rotten scum! - Aah! 1230 00:59:35,171 --> 00:59:36,832 Aah! You're hideous! 1231 00:59:36,906 --> 00:59:38,134 Get off my planet! 1232 00:59:38,207 --> 00:59:40,971 - No! - Is everything all right? 1233 00:59:41,044 --> 00:59:42,375 The exits are all blocked. 1234 00:59:42,445 --> 00:59:43,935 I'll find one, sir. 1235 00:59:44,013 --> 00:59:46,106 Everybody, clear! 1236 00:59:48,351 --> 00:59:51,149 This way, sir! God, this is exciting! 1237 00:59:51,220 --> 00:59:54,121 You're excited? You should feel my nipples. 1238 00:59:54,190 --> 00:59:55,987 Cody? 1239 00:59:56,059 --> 00:59:59,119 Cody? Cody, where are you? 1240 00:59:59,195 --> 01:00:00,389 Honey? 1241 01:00:00,463 --> 01:00:02,795 GIGGINS: After today's incident in the East Room, 1242 01:00:02,865 --> 01:00:05,356 the White House is now advising all citizens 1243 01:00:05,435 --> 01:00:09,166 to board up their homes and prepare for an alien invasion. 1244 01:00:09,238 --> 01:00:11,172 Oh, no. 1245 01:00:11,240 --> 01:00:13,674 And now a News 8 exclusive. 1246 01:00:13,743 --> 01:00:16,075 The killer videotape you've been hearing about. 1247 01:00:16,145 --> 01:00:17,703 We're the only station that has it, 1248 01:00:17,780 --> 01:00:19,441 and we're showing it all night. 1249 01:00:19,515 --> 01:00:21,506 Very exciting. Let's roll it again. 1250 01:00:25,822 --> 01:00:28,188 There. Nobody's getting through that sucker. 1251 01:00:28,257 --> 01:00:30,555 But we have to get down to the cellar. 1252 01:00:32,095 --> 01:00:34,086 - George. - Cindy. 1253 01:00:34,163 --> 01:00:35,596 There's no time. 1254 01:00:35,665 --> 01:00:36,996 Cody. 1255 01:00:37,066 --> 01:00:39,034 Thank God. I've been worried sick. 1256 01:00:39,102 --> 01:00:41,662 He showed up about an hour ago. I tried to call. 1257 01:00:41,738 --> 01:00:43,399 No, he didn't. 1258 01:00:43,473 --> 01:00:45,498 Okay, but I was gonna. 1259 01:00:45,575 --> 01:00:47,338 No, he wasn't. 1260 01:00:47,410 --> 01:00:50,868 Cody, the point is you can't just run away like that. 1261 01:00:50,947 --> 01:00:52,881 I wanted to be with George. 1262 01:00:52,949 --> 01:00:55,645 Oh, honey, I know you want a dad, but... 1263 01:00:55,718 --> 01:00:58,744 Oh, trust me, Cody, I'm not good at anything. 1264 01:00:58,821 --> 01:01:00,220 Why would I be good at that? 1265 01:01:00,289 --> 01:01:02,587 SUE: Uncle George! 1266 01:01:14,904 --> 01:01:17,464 It's gonna be okay, Cody. 1267 01:01:17,540 --> 01:01:19,940 I'm going to die, aren't I? 1268 01:01:20,009 --> 01:01:22,773 Cody, did I ever tell you what your mom said 1269 01:01:22,845 --> 01:01:24,938 about you the day you were born? 1270 01:01:25,014 --> 01:01:26,038 No. 1271 01:01:26,115 --> 01:01:28,515 I was in the delivery room with her. 1272 01:01:28,584 --> 01:01:30,415 She was having a hard time. 1273 01:01:30,486 --> 01:01:32,113 Then you began to come out of her. 1274 01:01:33,189 --> 01:01:35,350 And your mom screamed and screamed in pain. 1275 01:01:35,425 --> 01:01:37,188 She yelled, "Just kill me. 1276 01:01:37,260 --> 01:01:38,852 Bludgeon me with a bedpan. 1277 01:01:38,928 --> 01:01:41,624 Whatever you do, put me out of this pain." 1278 01:01:41,698 --> 01:01:43,859 She was gushing torrents of blood. 1279 01:01:43,933 --> 01:01:46,663 I have this all on tape if you want to see it someday. 1280 01:01:46,736 --> 01:01:48,636 Well, finally you came out. 1281 01:01:48,705 --> 01:01:51,503 Your mom cut your umbilical cord herself. 1282 01:01:51,574 --> 01:01:54,509 Well, on the second try. 1283 01:01:54,577 --> 01:01:57,341 The first time she snipped your penis in half. 1284 01:01:57,413 --> 01:01:58,903 After all, she was drunk. 1285 01:01:58,981 --> 01:02:00,471 Actually, drugged. 1286 01:02:00,550 --> 01:02:03,519 We'd been out the night before celebrating St. Patrick's Day. 1287 01:02:03,586 --> 01:02:05,816 She thought, "Hey, I never tasted crystal meth." 1288 01:02:05,888 --> 01:02:07,822 So she did just a little. 1289 01:02:07,890 --> 01:02:09,084 My penis? 1290 01:02:09,158 --> 01:02:10,022 Yes. 1291 01:02:10,093 --> 01:02:12,584 They sewed it on upside down. 1292 01:02:12,662 --> 01:02:14,459 So that's why I pee up? 1293 01:02:14,530 --> 01:02:15,997 Yes. We'll get it fixed, honey. 1294 01:02:16,065 --> 01:02:18,966 It's on my list of things. Right after we get TiVo. 1295 01:02:19,035 --> 01:02:20,832 Anyway, there you were. 1296 01:02:20,903 --> 01:02:22,495 Your mom turned to me and said, 1297 01:02:22,572 --> 01:02:25,507 "Hey, you want him? Take him." 1298 01:02:25,575 --> 01:02:27,338 Then she died. 1299 01:02:27,410 --> 01:02:28,843 And I took you. 1300 01:02:28,911 --> 01:02:31,106 Do you know why? 1301 01:02:31,180 --> 01:02:32,841 I had just lost my cat in a fire, 1302 01:02:32,915 --> 01:02:34,780 and I needed something to pet and feed. 1303 01:02:34,851 --> 01:02:37,684 And I miss that cat, Cody. 1304 01:02:37,754 --> 01:02:39,244 But I love you. 1305 01:02:39,322 --> 01:02:41,483 And nothing's ever gonna change that, 1306 01:02:41,557 --> 01:02:44,185 not even the very painful death we're about to experience. 1307 01:02:44,260 --> 01:02:45,727 TOM: George! 1308 01:02:47,363 --> 01:02:49,092 [Banging] 1309 01:02:54,003 --> 01:02:55,027 Are they gone? 1310 01:02:55,104 --> 01:02:56,298 I don't hear anything. 1311 01:02:56,372 --> 01:02:57,464 [Banging] 1312 01:03:03,045 --> 01:03:04,307 [Screams effeminately] 1313 01:03:04,380 --> 01:03:05,642 Don't worry, Sue. 1314 01:03:05,715 --> 01:03:06,977 SUE: It was Uncle George. 1315 01:03:07,049 --> 01:03:09,643 Well, it's scary. 1316 01:03:11,053 --> 01:03:13,317 Good work, Sue. 1317 01:03:13,389 --> 01:03:15,653 I don't know what stupid, idiotic thing 1318 01:03:15,725 --> 01:03:17,716 made these lights go off. 1319 01:03:17,794 --> 01:03:20,319 All right, there's spare fuses in the crawl space. 1320 01:03:20,396 --> 01:03:21,920 I can get these lights back on. 1321 01:03:21,998 --> 01:03:23,260 [Banging] 1322 01:03:23,332 --> 01:03:25,823 Quick, George, grab that railroad tie. 1323 01:03:25,902 --> 01:03:27,597 Jam it against the door. 1324 01:03:28,004 --> 01:03:29,232 - Oh! - [Gasps] 1325 01:03:29,305 --> 01:03:31,500 My balls! 1326 01:03:31,574 --> 01:03:33,667 Oh! Not those! 1327 01:03:33,743 --> 01:03:35,335 Jesus! 1328 01:03:35,411 --> 01:03:36,708 No! 1329 01:03:37,814 --> 01:03:38,781 SUE: Uncle George! 1330 01:03:38,848 --> 01:03:40,179 I'm scared! 1331 01:03:40,249 --> 01:03:43,047 Oh, sweetie, come here. It's okay. 1332 01:03:43,119 --> 01:03:44,746 Aah! 1333 01:03:44,821 --> 01:03:47,915 There's something on the other side of the door. 1334 01:04:01,304 --> 01:04:03,329 I can't see anything. 1335 01:04:19,021 --> 01:04:20,249 Oh, my God. 1336 01:04:20,323 --> 01:04:21,756 Can you see them? 1337 01:04:21,824 --> 01:04:23,553 They're horrible. 1338 01:04:23,626 --> 01:04:25,719 They're grayish with big black eyes. 1339 01:04:25,795 --> 01:04:27,558 Their teeth are grotesque. 1340 01:04:27,630 --> 01:04:29,257 [Trilling] 1341 01:04:29,332 --> 01:04:32,631 - I think they're giggling. - What? 1342 01:04:33,502 --> 01:04:34,434 Oh, no. 1343 01:04:34,503 --> 01:04:36,994 Oh, no, I think... 1344 01:04:37,073 --> 01:04:39,667 - I think they want... - [Banging] 1345 01:04:41,244 --> 01:04:42,836 Aaah! Help! 1346 01:04:42,912 --> 01:04:44,573 Cody! Oh, my God! 1347 01:04:44,647 --> 01:04:46,945 George. Swing away, George. 1348 01:04:47,016 --> 01:04:48,916 - Aah! Aunt Cindy, help! - I'm coming, Cody. 1349 01:04:48,985 --> 01:04:50,179 I'll save you. 1350 01:04:50,253 --> 01:04:51,982 - Ugh! - Die! 1351 01:04:55,157 --> 01:04:56,089 Die! 1352 01:04:56,158 --> 01:04:58,285 You damn aliens, let him go! 1353 01:04:58,361 --> 01:04:59,953 You're not getting in here! 1354 01:05:00,029 --> 01:05:01,929 - What else you got? - George. 1355 01:05:01,998 --> 01:05:04,091 There! Had enough? 1356 01:05:04,166 --> 01:05:06,794 Yeah. Forget it, Cody. Thank me later. 1357 01:05:06,869 --> 01:05:08,632 Oh, Cody. Oh, thank God. 1358 01:05:08,704 --> 01:05:09,636 Come on. 1359 01:05:09,705 --> 01:05:10,797 SUE: Daddy! 1360 01:05:10,873 --> 01:05:12,101 - Daddy! - Sue! 1361 01:05:15,211 --> 01:05:16,473 Oh! 1362 01:05:16,545 --> 01:05:18,638 Mahalik, what are you doing here? 1363 01:05:18,714 --> 01:05:20,875 I told you the hood's always got your back. 1364 01:05:20,950 --> 01:05:23,942 Thank God. There's two of them at the door. 1365 01:05:24,020 --> 01:05:24,987 They're gone. 1366 01:05:26,289 --> 01:05:28,382 Good. They couldn't get in. 1367 01:05:28,457 --> 01:05:29,890 I hear they can't open doors. 1368 01:05:29,959 --> 01:05:31,654 They mastered space flight, 1369 01:05:31,727 --> 01:05:33,627 but they can't get through a wooden door? 1370 01:05:33,696 --> 01:05:35,823 Oh, look, the cellar's the safest place. 1371 01:05:35,898 --> 01:05:37,729 Women and children stay here. 1372 01:05:37,800 --> 01:05:39,859 - Ugh! - All right, and the men, 1373 01:05:39,936 --> 01:05:41,301 we go outside and fight. 1374 01:05:41,370 --> 01:05:44,032 Right. And what's the cutoff age for children? 1375 01:05:44,106 --> 01:05:45,505 Come on! 1376 01:05:45,574 --> 01:05:47,064 [Groans] 1377 01:05:58,554 --> 01:05:59,816 [Rustling] 1378 01:05:59,889 --> 01:06:02,221 - [Shovel cocks] - Follow me. 1379 01:06:09,398 --> 01:06:10,524 [Tires screeching] 1380 01:06:15,404 --> 01:06:16,428 I'm sorry. 1381 01:06:16,505 --> 01:06:18,905 I thought I was hitting the brake. 1382 01:06:18,975 --> 01:06:21,910 Now, we don't have to go through insurance, do we? 1383 01:06:21,978 --> 01:06:24,071 Mr. President, what are you doing here? 1384 01:06:24,146 --> 01:06:25,511 I'm looking for Cindy Campbell. 1385 01:06:25,581 --> 01:06:28,049 She may hold the key to defeating the aliens. 1386 01:06:28,117 --> 01:06:32,247 Ah, good. The Air Force is here with those new round planes. 1387 01:06:33,489 --> 01:06:36,253 We don't have round planes, sir. 1388 01:06:36,325 --> 01:06:37,917 Oh, my God. 1389 01:06:37,994 --> 01:06:39,461 Oh, my God. 1390 01:06:39,528 --> 01:06:42,691 - [Hip-hop music plays] - Wait. Do you hear that? 1391 01:06:42,765 --> 01:06:45,199 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah 1392 01:06:45,267 --> 01:06:47,701 Ah, ah, ah, ah 1393 01:06:47,770 --> 01:06:51,035 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah 1394 01:06:52,375 --> 01:06:54,468 - Yo, what's up, George? - C.J.! 1395 01:06:54,543 --> 01:06:56,511 I told you the 'hood always got your back. 1396 01:06:56,579 --> 01:06:59,810 I got the boys with me. Get out the car, man. 1397 01:06:59,882 --> 01:07:00,940 Who we gonna shoot? 1398 01:07:01,017 --> 01:07:02,314 Is y'all ready to go step? 1399 01:07:02,385 --> 01:07:04,751 Let's go do this, 'cause I'm hyped right now! 1400 01:07:04,820 --> 01:07:07,084 - Real hyped! - You stepped on my shoe, bitch! 1401 01:07:07,156 --> 01:07:08,282 Call me "bitch" again, 1402 01:07:08,357 --> 01:07:11,258 and I'll park your truck dead in your ass. 1403 01:07:11,327 --> 01:07:12,123 Damn, homey! 1404 01:07:12,194 --> 01:07:14,526 - In the cornfield. - They're coming! 1405 01:07:14,597 --> 01:07:16,724 Me and my boys, we gonna take care of this. 1406 01:07:16,799 --> 01:07:18,266 Come on, let's go. 1407 01:07:18,334 --> 01:07:20,302 Son, I'd bust this shit right now. 1408 01:07:20,369 --> 01:07:22,132 - Your mama! - I got your number, homey. 1409 01:07:22,204 --> 01:07:24,399 - We over here, y'all! - He ain't gonna bust nothing. 1410 01:07:24,473 --> 01:07:25,735 I got nuts bigger than him. 1411 01:07:25,808 --> 01:07:28,675 Whoa, country-ass, maple-syrup nigga. 1412 01:07:28,744 --> 01:07:32,180 Yeah, you want some biscuits? You want some biscuits? 1413 01:07:33,582 --> 01:07:35,641 Get down! Get down! 1414 01:07:43,359 --> 01:07:45,520 I can't believe what I just saw. 1415 01:07:45,594 --> 01:07:47,323 These men died for their country. 1416 01:07:47,396 --> 01:07:50,661 Send flowers to their bitches and hos. 1417 01:07:55,104 --> 01:07:57,163 I can't break free! 1418 01:07:57,239 --> 01:08:01,039 Think! They must have some kind of weakness. 1419 01:08:04,713 --> 01:08:05,475 - Huh? - Huh? 1420 01:08:05,548 --> 01:08:06,742 I found it! 1421 01:08:06,816 --> 01:08:08,784 Without their heads, they're powerless! 1422 01:08:08,851 --> 01:08:10,785 Please, no. We mean you no harm. 1423 01:08:10,853 --> 01:08:13,617 We traveled to your planet to find an evil little girl. 1424 01:08:13,689 --> 01:08:17,216 We must destroy her before seven days. 1425 01:08:17,293 --> 01:08:19,659 You mean you watched the videotape? 1426 01:08:19,728 --> 01:08:22,219 Our satellite picked up what we thought was "Pootie Tang." 1427 01:08:22,298 --> 01:08:23,788 That was a week ago. 1428 01:08:23,866 --> 01:08:28,963 And now our entire race will die unless the girl is destroyed. 1429 01:08:29,038 --> 01:08:32,007 Oh, see? They are peaceful. 1430 01:08:32,074 --> 01:08:35,305 If they're so peaceful, why were they choking us? 1431 01:08:35,377 --> 01:08:38,005 Oh, that's how we say hello. 1432 01:08:38,080 --> 01:08:39,479 - Hello! - Nice to see you. 1433 01:08:39,548 --> 01:08:41,539 - Hello. - Hello. 1434 01:08:41,617 --> 01:08:43,585 Well, how do you guys say goodbye? 1435 01:08:43,652 --> 01:08:44,880 Oh! 1436 01:08:44,954 --> 01:08:47,514 [Groans] I had to ask. 1437 01:08:47,590 --> 01:08:52,550 If you think that's strange, you should see how we pee. 1438 01:08:52,628 --> 01:08:55,153 [Choking] 1439 01:08:58,434 --> 01:09:01,801 So we're not so different after all. 1440 01:09:04,507 --> 01:09:06,441 There's something about this place. 1441 01:09:06,509 --> 01:09:09,137 It's like I've seen it before. 1442 01:09:11,080 --> 01:09:12,980 Oh, my God. 1443 01:09:16,452 --> 01:09:18,477 This used to be their farm. 1444 01:09:18,554 --> 01:09:20,351 She died right here. 1445 01:09:34,837 --> 01:09:37,203 There's something down there. 1446 01:09:48,017 --> 01:09:49,575 Ugh! 1447 01:10:01,397 --> 01:10:04,889 Hey, awesome. Yeah, you got it. 1448 01:10:04,967 --> 01:10:06,161 Just look at this. 1449 01:10:06,235 --> 01:10:09,534 Human beings and aliens working together. 1450 01:10:09,605 --> 01:10:13,063 We're all just one big galactic family. 1451 01:10:13,142 --> 01:10:14,905 Family. 1452 01:10:14,977 --> 01:10:17,172 That's just what I've been running away from. 1453 01:10:17,246 --> 01:10:20,340 Well, that's because you're an idiot. 1454 01:10:30,292 --> 01:10:32,226 This is it. 1455 01:10:32,294 --> 01:10:34,455 ARCHITECT: My wife took her to the family farm 1456 01:10:34,530 --> 01:10:36,657 and drowned her in the well. 1457 01:10:40,035 --> 01:10:44,938 The little girl. She's frightened of the well. 1458 01:10:48,110 --> 01:10:49,668 [Gasps] 1459 01:11:02,858 --> 01:11:04,018 Aah! 1460 01:11:04,093 --> 01:11:06,618 - Ugh! - Cindy! 1461 01:11:09,131 --> 01:11:11,065 [Crowbar clanks] 1462 01:11:20,409 --> 01:11:23,242 [Chainsaw sputters, buzzes] 1463 01:11:43,932 --> 01:11:46,025 Time to go back down the well, bitch. 1464 01:11:46,101 --> 01:11:48,661 [Growling] 1465 01:11:48,737 --> 01:11:49,669 Cindy! 1466 01:11:49,738 --> 01:11:52,502 No. Don't hurt him! 1467 01:11:53,475 --> 01:11:54,965 Cindy, come outside. 1468 01:11:55,044 --> 01:11:56,602 - The aliens aren't invading. - Aah! 1469 01:11:56,679 --> 01:11:58,237 Aah! 1470 01:11:58,314 --> 01:12:00,043 Don't worry, Cody. I'll save you. 1471 01:12:00,115 --> 01:12:01,707 - Aah! - CIND Y: Wait! 1472 01:12:01,784 --> 01:12:04,014 Wait. Don't do this. 1473 01:12:04,086 --> 01:12:06,384 You don't have to be evil. 1474 01:12:07,356 --> 01:12:10,951 I know what happened to you, Tabitha. 1475 01:12:12,194 --> 01:12:15,095 I know what your mom did. That was wrong. 1476 01:12:15,164 --> 01:12:16,859 You were just a little girl. 1477 01:12:16,932 --> 01:12:20,891 You're still that little girl, just a lot more corpsy 1478 01:12:20,969 --> 01:12:23,403 and with really bad teeth. 1479 01:12:23,472 --> 01:12:27,568 But maybe all you need is a mother. 1480 01:12:31,213 --> 01:12:33,113 And a father. 1481 01:12:45,761 --> 01:12:47,092 We could be... 1482 01:12:47,162 --> 01:12:49,187 A family. 1483 01:12:53,802 --> 01:12:55,531 Thank you all. 1484 01:12:55,604 --> 01:12:59,040 Your love has broken the curse and freed my soul. 1485 01:12:59,108 --> 01:13:00,837 I'll never have to kill again. 1486 01:13:00,909 --> 01:13:02,570 Really? 1487 01:13:02,644 --> 01:13:06,239 Nah! I'm just screwing with you! 1488 01:13:06,315 --> 01:13:08,579 [Grunts] Aah! 1489 01:13:08,650 --> 01:13:10,641 I just want to tell you both good luck. 1490 01:13:10,719 --> 01:13:12,448 - We're all counting on you. - [Splash] 1491 01:13:21,597 --> 01:13:22,928 Now it's over. 1492 01:13:22,998 --> 01:13:24,192 - [Gasps] - Aah! 1493 01:13:24,266 --> 01:13:25,858 Oh, no, no, it's okay. 1494 01:13:25,934 --> 01:13:27,492 He's our friend. 1495 01:13:27,569 --> 01:13:29,537 Thank you for saving our species. 1496 01:13:29,605 --> 01:13:31,539 Now we must return to our home planet. 1497 01:13:31,607 --> 01:13:32,835 Goodbye, then. 1498 01:13:32,908 --> 01:13:33,840 Ugh! 1499 01:13:33,909 --> 01:13:35,467 Goodbye. 1500 01:13:54,229 --> 01:13:56,697 Hey, congratulations, George! 1501 01:13:56,765 --> 01:13:58,699 You know the 'hood always got your back. 1502 01:13:58,767 --> 01:14:00,200 Yeah, yeah! 1503 01:14:00,269 --> 01:14:01,702 Come on! 1504 01:14:06,208 --> 01:14:07,300 Bye! 1505 01:14:07,376 --> 01:14:08,843 Whoo! 1506 01:14:08,911 --> 01:14:10,845 - Oh! - Oh! 1507 01:14:21,390 --> 01:14:23,085 ALL: Bye! 1508 01:14:23,158 --> 01:14:26,787 Oh, George, I'm so happy. 1509 01:14:26,862 --> 01:14:28,329 Finally we're a family. 1510 01:14:28,397 --> 01:14:31,662 Yeah. You, me, and... 1511 01:14:31,733 --> 01:14:32,597 - Damn! - Damn! 1512 01:14:32,668 --> 01:14:34,067 [Tires screeching] 1513 01:14:34,136 --> 01:14:36,969 Cindy, George, wait! 1514 01:14:39,641 --> 01:14:41,734 [Sighs] 1515 01:14:43,412 --> 01:14:44,674 Come on 1516 01:14:44,746 --> 01:14:45,838 "Scary Movie 3" 1517 01:14:45,914 --> 01:14:47,506 Welcome to the future, baby 1518 01:14:47,583 --> 01:14:50,017 You think you hot shit 'cause you got ice on your wrist 1519 01:14:50,085 --> 01:14:52,679 Now, y'all picture this... tough guy turned snitch 1520 01:14:52,754 --> 01:14:54,585 Knew he was lying by the way his eyes twitch 1521 01:14:54,656 --> 01:14:55,714 He gulp when he swallow 1522 01:14:55,791 --> 01:14:57,281 When he spoke, his voice pitch 1523 01:14:57,359 --> 01:14:59,020 My first thought's to slap him up, but I'm grown 1524 01:14:59,094 --> 01:15:00,527 So I dropped a jewel in his ear 1525 01:15:00,596 --> 01:15:02,291 Told him get on, leave it alone 1526 01:15:02,364 --> 01:15:04,628 Now he's asking questions he shoulda asked from the start 1527 01:15:04,700 --> 01:15:07,134 I'm gonna spit from the heart, spit till it's dark 1528 01:15:07,202 --> 01:15:09,466 From the stage in the park, I'm gonna bite if you bark 1529 01:15:09,538 --> 01:15:11,267 Just to show him that it's fun to me 1530 01:15:11,340 --> 01:15:13,467 And take a look at what being broke gonna mean 1531 01:15:13,542 --> 01:15:15,806 I am the truth, plus I'm hungry 1532 01:15:15,878 --> 01:15:18,312 Heads or tail, playboy, what's it gonna be? 1533 01:15:18,380 --> 01:15:20,644 You cannot escape your fate in the streets 1534 01:15:20,716 --> 01:15:22,980 Okay, I'll count cash, you count sheep 1535 01:15:23,051 --> 01:15:25,315 Better not sleep on the beats, capisce 1536 01:15:25,387 --> 01:15:27,321 Ain't no jokes in here 1537 01:15:27,389 --> 01:15:29,482 Ain't nothing but grown folk up in here 1538 01:15:29,558 --> 01:15:31,992 Don't come poking your nose in here 1539 01:15:32,060 --> 01:15:34,824 Listen to me, I ain't scared 1540 01:15:34,897 --> 01:15:36,489 Ain't no jokes in here 1541 01:15:36,565 --> 01:15:38,829 Ain't nothing but grown folks up in here 1542 01:15:38,901 --> 01:15:41,495 Don't come poking your nose in here 1543 01:15:41,570 --> 01:15:43,561 Listen to me, I ain't scared 1544 01:15:43,639 --> 01:15:45,163 Now, Dame Lee 1545 01:15:45,240 --> 01:15:47,208 This is slow motion like a Japanese warrior 1546 01:15:47,276 --> 01:15:48,641 I'm a shogun 1547 01:15:48,710 --> 01:15:50,678 If I got beef with more than one problem 1548 01:15:50,746 --> 01:15:52,236 You can't afford 'em, son 1549 01:15:52,314 --> 01:15:54,509 Used to mess with your chick out of boredom, son 1550 01:15:54,583 --> 01:15:56,676 Then I'd make her leave like she was autumn, son 1551 01:15:56,752 --> 01:15:58,845 I'm not talking to him, I'm talking to all of them 1552 01:15:58,921 --> 01:16:00,786 I don't discriminate, I'm who they women love 1553 01:16:00,856 --> 01:16:02,448 Yo, I'm who they kids look up to 1554 01:16:02,524 --> 01:16:03,957 Hi, my name is Dame Lee 1555 01:16:04,026 --> 01:16:06,119 I do it 'cause I can, do you blame me? 1556 01:16:06,194 --> 01:16:07,456 Watch how you feel about me 1557 01:16:07,529 --> 01:16:09,258 Everything that I spit is true 1558 01:16:09,331 --> 01:16:11,799 And my fam got the same blood running through them, too 1559 01:16:11,867 --> 01:16:13,801 You shook, son, look at how you looking 1560 01:16:13,869 --> 01:16:16,804 Wearing tampon singles 1561 01:16:16,872 --> 01:16:18,305 I'm a beast over beats 1562 01:16:18,373 --> 01:16:19,931 I count cash, you count sheep 1563 01:16:20,008 --> 01:16:21,134 Don't sleep on the beats 1564 01:16:21,209 --> 01:16:23,803 I'm a beast 1565 01:16:23,879 --> 01:16:25,574 Ain't no jokes in here 1566 01:16:25,647 --> 01:16:27,808 Ain't nothing but grown folk up in here 1567 01:16:27,883 --> 01:16:30,147 Don't come poking your nose in here 1568 01:16:30,218 --> 01:16:33,153 Listen to me, I ain't scared 1569 01:16:33,221 --> 01:16:34,813 Ain't no jokes in here 1570 01:16:34,890 --> 01:16:37,154 Ain't nothing but grown folk up in here 1571 01:16:37,225 --> 01:16:39,693 Don't come poking your nose in here 1572 01:16:39,761 --> 01:16:41,626 Listen to me... 1573 01:16:41,697 --> 01:16:43,961 You can live or you can die, die, die 1574 01:16:44,032 --> 01:16:46,728 You can bounce up like a "G" or break down and cry 1575 01:16:46,802 --> 01:16:49,430 You's a beotch, unh, yeah 1576 01:16:49,504 --> 01:16:52,337 And that's word from the ill crowd 1577 01:16:52,407 --> 01:16:54,773 Thug, look at what you got, please 1578 01:16:54,843 --> 01:16:57,437 Poppin' shots on your enemies 1579 01:17:01,083 --> 01:17:03,449 It ain't no slick talkin' your way out the battle 1580 01:17:03,518 --> 01:17:05,816 The tension's real thick, gettin' beefier than cattle 1581 01:17:05,887 --> 01:17:08,219 So you cowboys grab your heater and your saddle 1582 01:17:08,290 --> 01:17:10,588 Mount up, unh, yeah, get your jollies 1583 01:17:10,659 --> 01:17:12,786 Don't be too nervous, buddy, 'cause I'ma get to dissin' 1584 01:17:12,861 --> 01:17:13,987 While your homey's givin' up 1585 01:17:14,062 --> 01:17:15,654 Two fingers like Richard Nixon 1586 01:17:15,731 --> 01:17:17,892 I keep it real street 'cause I'm bred from the street 1587 01:17:17,966 --> 01:17:20,230 T- shirt upon my back, Chuck Taylors on my feet 1588 01:17:20,302 --> 01:17:23,533 Major bubblin' major fumblin', be troublin' 1589 01:17:23,605 --> 01:17:26,403 Broads is into major humpin', I'm livin' for somethin' 1590 01:17:26,475 --> 01:17:28,204 I envied nothin', I never be frontin' 1591 01:17:28,276 --> 01:17:30,608 Just check how a be coming 1592 01:17:30,679 --> 01:17:32,977 Bonecrusher, homey, you heard 1593 01:17:34,850 --> 01:17:37,080 Might be boozy but I ain't bankin' no curves 1594 01:17:37,152 --> 01:17:40,349 Off the dank and the drank, I be chasin' them skirts 1595 01:17:40,422 --> 01:17:42,788 Thug, look at what you got, please 1596 01:17:42,858 --> 01:17:45,383 Poppin' shots on your enemies 1597 01:17:50,232 --> 01:17:52,632 Thug, look at what you got, please 1598 01:17:52,701 --> 01:17:55,192 Poppin' shots on your enemies 1599 01:17:58,173 --> 01:17:59,538 Listen and observe me 1600 01:17:59,608 --> 01:18:01,337 Doo doo like tore sandals 1601 01:18:01,410 --> 01:18:03,640 I never reach, I got pull like door handles 1602 01:18:03,712 --> 01:18:06,044 Boy got flame, man, I burn like your candles 1603 01:18:06,114 --> 01:18:07,672 Are you in key on your life's piano? 1604 01:18:07,749 --> 01:18:09,114 Lifestyle is "Sopranos" 1605 01:18:09,184 --> 01:18:10,742 Here today but then you're gone tomorrow 1606 01:18:10,819 --> 01:18:12,218 Proceed to bubble... 1607 01:18:12,287 --> 01:18:13,686 The need is kind of dire, live wire 1608 01:18:13,755 --> 01:18:15,279 Like an electric box during a storm 1609 01:18:15,357 --> 01:18:16,619 Forced to live like this 1610 01:18:16,692 --> 01:18:17,954 Or that's how real it's gonna get 1611 01:18:18,026 --> 01:18:20,085 You can live or you can die, die, die 1612 01:18:20,162 --> 01:18:22,858 You can bounce up like a "G" or break down and cry 1613 01:18:22,931 --> 01:18:25,491 You's a beotch, unh, yeah 1614 01:18:25,567 --> 01:18:28,627 And that's word from the ill crowd 1615 01:18:28,704 --> 01:18:30,934 Thug, look at what you got, please 1616 01:18:31,006 --> 01:18:33,497 Poppin' shots on your enemies 1617 01:18:38,013 --> 01:18:40,481 Thug, look at what you got, please 1618 01:18:40,549 --> 01:18:43,347 Poppin' shots on your enemies 1619 01:18:46,555 --> 01:18:49,217 [Kebyar's "Smoke It Up" plays] 1620 01:18:49,291 --> 01:18:52,283 Just shake and break and roll it up 1621 01:18:53,462 --> 01:18:56,659 Just stay and blaze and smoke it up 1622 01:18:59,334 --> 01:19:04,135 And if you're not alone, then you better find the door 1623 01:19:04,206 --> 01:19:06,299 Now, while you hang around V.I.P. 1624 01:19:06,374 --> 01:19:08,740 Naw, we smokin' good, should be chillin' with me 1625 01:19:08,810 --> 01:19:10,573 You like the way the green tickle your nose 1626 01:19:10,645 --> 01:19:13,239 Making you want to slip out those clothes and get... 1627 01:19:13,315 --> 01:19:15,010 I hear you giggle but you know it's the truth 1628 01:19:15,083 --> 01:19:17,278 Why don't you bounce in my crib, we can roll on the roof 1629 01:19:17,352 --> 01:19:19,445 You can introduce Kebyar to your crew 1630 01:19:19,521 --> 01:19:23,958 We can get down and maybe they would like to come, too 1631 01:19:24,025 --> 01:19:27,290 Just shake and break and roll it up 1632 01:19:28,330 --> 01:19:31,629 Just stay and blaze and smoke it up 1633 01:19:32,734 --> 01:19:35,965 Just shake and break and roll it up 1634 01:19:37,139 --> 01:19:40,336 Just stay and blaze and smoke it up 1635 01:19:43,044 --> 01:19:48,141 And if you're not alone, then you better find the door 1636 01:19:49,951 --> 01:19:52,818 Time to bring it in on, all night I'm on the wrong... 1637 01:19:52,888 --> 01:19:56,881 My Caddy ridin' down the 285, lookin' live up in the ride 1638 01:19:56,958 --> 01:19:59,051 I love it, the way it makes me move now 1639 01:19:59,127 --> 01:20:01,288 Blow it out my nose on the way to the door 1640 01:20:01,363 --> 01:20:03,558 I want it, I need it to make me groove now 1641 01:20:03,632 --> 01:20:05,657 If I don't have it... 1642 01:20:05,734 --> 01:20:10,103 I love it, the way it makes me move now 1643 01:20:10,172 --> 01:20:12,231 Yo, yo, yo 1644 01:20:12,307 --> 01:20:15,003 Who you lookin' at? Tryin' to clock us? 1645 01:20:15,076 --> 01:20:17,977 I ain't feelin' that, you can't stop us 1646 01:20:18,046 --> 01:20:20,674 Who you lookin' at? Don't try to drop us 1647 01:20:20,749 --> 01:20:23,650 'Cause ain't nobody, can't nobody ever touch us 1648 01:20:23,718 --> 01:20:26,380 Yeah, notice... 1649 01:20:26,454 --> 01:20:27,978 Bullets spark through your parka 1650 01:20:28,056 --> 01:20:29,216 But it's really your fault 1651 01:20:29,291 --> 01:20:31,759 It was silly to talk 1652 01:20:31,827 --> 01:20:33,226 Feelin' ya grillin' me 1653 01:20:33,295 --> 01:20:35,923 Stop tryin' to get rid of me, the streets know this 1654 01:20:35,997 --> 01:20:37,862 See, death threats are never bogus 1655 01:20:37,933 --> 01:20:39,457 If you're dead wrong, we stand strong 1656 01:20:39,534 --> 01:20:41,559 Collective soldiers, warriors 1657 01:20:41,636 --> 01:20:43,695 By any means come out victorious 1658 01:20:43,772 --> 01:20:46,240 Don't be sayin' my name 1659 01:20:46,308 --> 01:20:49,038 Who you lookin' at? Tryin' to clock us? 1660 01:20:49,110 --> 01:20:51,908 I ain't feelin' that, you can't stop us 1661 01:20:51,980 --> 01:20:54,540 Who you lookin' at? Don't try to drop us 1662 01:20:54,616 --> 01:20:57,915 'Cause ain't nobody, can't nobody ever touch us 1663 01:20:57,986 --> 01:21:00,454 You don't want to get bitten by pedigree... 1664 01:21:00,522 --> 01:21:03,082 Venomous sting sideline him till his physique 1665 01:21:03,158 --> 01:21:05,854 Looks like a leak, distressed, took like a thief 1666 01:21:05,927 --> 01:21:08,691 He quit thuggin' cold turkey 1667 01:21:08,763 --> 01:21:11,630 Yo, who you lookin' at? Tryin' to clock us? 1668 01:21:11,700 --> 01:21:14,396 I ain't feelin' that, you can't stop us 1669 01:21:14,469 --> 01:21:17,199 Who you lookin' at? Don't try to drop us 1670 01:21:17,272 --> 01:21:20,036 'Cause ain't nobody, can't nobody ever touch us 1671 01:21:20,108 --> 01:21:23,771 Hey, yo, what you feelin' like? 1672 01:21:25,280 --> 01:21:27,248 I got ya 1673 01:21:31,920 --> 01:21:34,912 [Dame Lee's "Rock Rock Bounce Bounce" plays] 1674 01:21:41,496 --> 01:21:43,930 I'm one of the greatest natural phenomenons 1675 01:21:43,999 --> 01:21:45,762 Like Ramadan 1676 01:21:45,834 --> 01:21:48,302 I wish you could see what I've seen when the drama's on 1677 01:21:48,370 --> 01:21:49,598 And when the drama's on 1678 01:21:49,671 --> 01:21:51,468 Call flex, the bomb is on 1679 01:21:51,539 --> 01:21:53,029 Cocked and loaded 1680 01:21:53,108 --> 01:21:54,939 Safely holstered under my left arm 1681 01:21:55,010 --> 01:21:57,274 Cold shoulder, that's how I hold it 1682 01:21:57,345 --> 01:21:59,643 Now I play the drama bringer, degrader 1683 01:21:59,714 --> 01:22:01,807 Dame Lee 1684 01:22:01,883 --> 01:22:04,283 Rock, rock, rock, bounce, bounce, bounce 1685 01:22:04,352 --> 01:22:06,684 Rock, rock, rock, bounce, bounce, bounce 1686 01:22:06,755 --> 01:22:08,985 Rock, rock, rock, bounce, bounce, bounce 1687 01:22:09,057 --> 01:22:12,288 Dame Lee, Dame Lee 1688 01:22:51,833 --> 01:22:54,529 Rock, rock, rock, bounce, bounce, bounce 1689 01:22:54,602 --> 01:22:57,628 MAHALIK: Deejay, spin that shit! 1690 01:23:02,711 --> 01:23:05,771 - [Note plays] - GE ORGE: Bitch 1691 01:23:05,847 --> 01:23:08,179 - [Lower note plays] - Ho 1692 01:23:08,249 --> 01:23:10,410 [Notes playing] 1693 01:23:19,060 --> 01:23:21,324 GE ORGE: Now everybody in the 2-0-2 1694 01:23:21,396 --> 01:23:24,058 Throw your hands in the air 'cause Fat Joe is through 1695 01:23:24,132 --> 01:23:27,659 Now everybody in the 2-0-2, throw 'em up 1696 01:23:27,736 --> 01:23:29,499 - Check it out. - Go! Go! Go! 1697 01:23:29,571 --> 01:23:31,971 I'm a white boy, but my neck is red 1698 01:23:32,040 --> 01:23:34,634 I put Miracle Whip on my Wonder Bread 1699 01:23:34,709 --> 01:23:37,872 My face is pale, nah, I've never been in jail 1700 01:23:37,946 --> 01:23:39,846 Me and Buffy spend every winter in Vail 1701 01:23:39,914 --> 01:23:41,814 How many bitches have I slapped? 1702 01:23:41,883 --> 01:23:43,248 Zero, unh 1703 01:23:43,318 --> 01:23:45,548 And Martha Stewart happens to be my hero 1704 01:23:45,620 --> 01:23:48,350 I grew up on a farm, and I was born with no rhythm 1705 01:23:48,423 --> 01:23:50,983 Dr. Phil's my uncle, and I like to hang with him 1706 01:23:51,059 --> 01:23:53,550 I can't dance, I wear khaki pants 1707 01:23:53,628 --> 01:23:56,495 My middle name's Lance, my grandma's from France 1708 01:23:56,564 --> 01:23:58,862 So maybe I'm wack 'cause my skin ain't black 1709 01:23:58,933 --> 01:24:00,298 But you can't talk smack 1710 01:24:00,368 --> 01:24:01,801 'Cause whitey just struck back 1711 01:24:01,870 --> 01:24:03,462 [Feedback]