1
00:00:02,872 --> 00:00:05,527
Hmm.
I think I'm going to
have the beef soo chow.
2
00:00:05,527 --> 00:00:08,182
Mmm,
I hear that's marvelous.
Oh, Mr. Fong.
3
00:00:08,182 --> 00:00:11,359
I am honored to have you
in my humble place,
Mr. Stephens...
4
00:00:11,359 --> 00:00:13,665
- My wife, Samantha.
- How do you do?
5
00:00:13,665 --> 00:00:15,798
MR. FONG:
How do you do?
6
00:00:15,798 --> 00:00:17,974
- Please sit down.
- Thank you.
7
00:00:17,974 --> 00:00:21,673
Now, I'm certainly looking
forward to the prospect
of handling your advertising.
8
00:00:21,673 --> 00:00:23,936
Yes, let's hope
we can bring that about.
9
00:00:23,936 --> 00:00:25,938
Mr. And Mrs. Tate
should be here any minute.
10
00:00:25,938 --> 00:00:28,115
Good.
In the meantime,
I have a surprise.
11
00:00:32,075 --> 00:00:33,990
This is my masterpiece,
12
00:00:33,990 --> 00:00:36,775
and I would like you
both to try it
with my compliment.
13
00:00:36,775 --> 00:00:38,734
Oh.
Now we're honored.
14
00:00:39,343 --> 00:00:40,344
Please.
15
00:00:41,563 --> 00:00:42,694
Thank you.
16
00:00:43,260 --> 00:00:44,653
Mmm!
17
00:00:47,221 --> 00:00:49,136
That's marvelous.
18
00:00:49,136 --> 00:00:51,225
What in the world is in it?
19
00:00:51,225 --> 00:00:53,575
Sorry,
the ingredients are secret.
20
00:00:53,575 --> 00:00:55,838
All but one.
21
00:00:55,838 --> 00:00:58,623
The Himalayan cinnamon stick
is very rare.
22
00:00:58,623 --> 00:01:01,800
From a remote area
high in the mountains.
23
00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:04,194
I have named my drink
after the stick.
24
00:01:04,194 --> 00:01:07,067
The Heavenly Himalayan.
25
00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:10,070
Night after night,
I stayed here after closing,
26
00:01:10,070 --> 00:01:14,117
trying this formula and that,
like a witch
over her cauldron.
27
00:01:14,117 --> 00:01:15,684
[SAM AND MR. FONG LAUGH]
28
00:01:15,684 --> 00:01:18,817
Well, you certainly came up
with a bewitching drink.
29
00:01:18,817 --> 00:01:20,602
Thank you.
Thank you.
30
00:01:20,602 --> 00:01:23,300
It's, uh, heavenly,
all right.
31
00:01:23,300 --> 00:01:26,129
And heady, too,
you might say.
32
00:01:27,087 --> 00:01:28,088
Ooh.
33
00:01:29,176 --> 00:01:31,395
Sam, are you all right?
34
00:01:31,395 --> 00:01:36,008
Uh, uh,
I feel a little strange.
35
00:01:36,008 --> 00:01:38,533
The truth is,
I feel a lot strange.
36
00:01:38,533 --> 00:01:41,492
- Strange?
- Dizzy.
37
00:01:41,492 --> 00:01:44,930
Perhaps madame
would like to lie down
in the office.
38
00:01:44,930 --> 00:01:49,370
Uh, no.
No, I think we better leave.
Oh!
39
00:01:49,370 --> 00:01:52,460
Uh, I am definitely
not well.
40
00:01:52,460 --> 00:01:55,506
Uh, the Himalayan cocktail
is really very mild.
41
00:01:55,506 --> 00:01:59,031
Uh, it's never affected
any of my customer
like that before.
42
00:01:59,031 --> 00:02:02,339
Well, Sam's not like any
of your other customers,
Mr. Fong.
43
00:02:02,339 --> 00:02:04,820
Cauldron, cauldron,
tell me true,
44
00:02:04,820 --> 00:02:06,822
how you stirred up
such a witches' brew.
45
00:02:06,822 --> 00:02:08,780
We do have to go home.
46
00:02:08,780 --> 00:02:11,218
Yes. Yes, and the better,
the sooner.
47
00:02:11,218 --> 00:02:13,872
Would you make our excuses
- to Mr. And Mrs. Tate?
- Yes.
48
00:02:18,007 --> 00:02:19,835
Oh, Mr. Stephens,
what's wrong?
49
00:02:19,835 --> 00:02:21,837
I wish I knew.
50
00:02:21,837 --> 00:02:24,492
Where am I?You're home.
51
00:02:24,492 --> 00:02:27,538
Samantha, what's wrong?[GIGGLING]
52
00:02:27,538 --> 00:02:29,497
Who's she?
53
00:02:29,497 --> 00:02:31,238
It's your Aunt Hagatha.
54
00:02:33,588 --> 00:02:37,592
Oh, so it is.
What's she doing here?
55
00:02:37,592 --> 00:02:38,854
She's sitting for us.
56
00:02:38,854 --> 00:02:43,554
[LAUGHING]
No, she's not.
She's standing for us.
57
00:02:44,642 --> 00:02:46,209
Toot, toot.
58
00:02:46,209 --> 00:02:48,690
Mr. Stephens, she's sick.
59
00:02:48,690 --> 00:02:50,822
Oh, I don't understand it.
60
00:02:50,822 --> 00:02:54,217
She just had
a couple of sips of a drink
and got looped.
61
00:02:54,217 --> 00:02:58,743
That's impossible.
Witches aren't subject
to such mortal frailties.
62
00:02:58,743 --> 00:03:01,311
Something is
radically wrong.
63
00:03:01,311 --> 00:03:04,314
Samantha,
should I get in touch
with Dr. Bombay?
64
00:03:04,314 --> 00:03:06,708
That quack?
Absolutely not.
65
00:03:06,708 --> 00:03:08,840
Samantha,
is he always this difficult?
66
00:03:08,840 --> 00:03:12,496
Relax, sweetheart.
We may not need
Dr. Bombay after all.
67
00:03:12,496 --> 00:03:14,846
I'm beginning to feel better.
68
00:03:14,846 --> 00:03:16,718
At least
I'm not dizzy anymore.
69
00:03:19,373 --> 00:03:22,027
Do you mind
if I try out my witchcraft?
70
00:03:22,027 --> 00:03:24,726
Whether he minds
or not doesn't matter.
71
00:03:24,726 --> 00:03:26,771
The only thing I mind
is her.
72
00:03:27,685 --> 00:03:30,035
Well, let's see.
73
00:03:30,035 --> 00:03:33,778
Uh, lamp, lamp
on yonder table,
fly to me if you are able.
74
00:03:40,655 --> 00:03:42,744
Well, now shall I call
Dr. Bombay,
75
00:03:42,744 --> 00:03:45,268
or are you still
in your mortal snit?
76
00:03:48,576 --> 00:03:51,274
- Sam!
- HAGATHA:
Great Hector's ghost!
77
00:03:51,274 --> 00:03:52,754
Now what?
78
00:03:52,754 --> 00:03:54,756
Look.
79
00:03:54,756 --> 00:03:57,280
Don't just stand there.
Get Dr. Bombay.
80
00:03:58,586 --> 00:03:59,717
[GASPING]
81
00:04:00,588 --> 00:04:02,024
Oh!
82
00:04:03,852 --> 00:04:07,203
And I bet you thought
you'd grown accustomed
to my face.
83
00:04:13,731 --> 00:04:16,386
NARRATOR:
Elizabeth Montgomery in...
84
00:04:22,436 --> 00:04:24,046
Bewitched.
85
00:04:24,046 --> 00:04:26,091
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]
86
00:05:05,087 --> 00:05:08,743
Darrin, uh,
before Aunt Hagatha puts in
a call to Dr. Bombay,
87
00:05:08,743 --> 00:05:11,920
uh, wouldn't you like
to go into the den
and work?
88
00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:14,096
Or take a nap?
Or something?
89
00:05:14,662 --> 00:05:16,620
No, thanks.
90
00:05:16,620 --> 00:05:19,493
Well, I know
Dr. Bombay isn't one
of your favorites.
91
00:05:19,493 --> 00:05:23,105
Among your friends
and relatives,
I have no favorites.
92
00:05:23,105 --> 00:05:25,716
I guess
everything your mother says
about him is true.
93
00:05:26,282 --> 00:05:27,849
Shh.
94
00:05:28,893 --> 00:05:31,983
Aunt Hagatha, please.
The spell?
95
00:05:31,983 --> 00:05:33,898
Oh, yes, dear.
Yes, yes.
96
00:05:33,898 --> 00:05:38,250
[CLEARS THROAT]
From Tripoli to Timbuktu,
97
00:05:38,250 --> 00:05:41,428
I beg, I plead,
I beseech of you.
98
00:05:41,428 --> 00:05:44,126
A moment longer,
don't delay.
99
00:05:44,126 --> 00:05:48,043
Dr. Bombay,
streak this way.
100
00:05:48,043 --> 00:05:50,001
Hi there, you called?
101
00:05:51,307 --> 00:05:54,397
Uh, we called.
We didn't whistle.
102
00:05:56,007 --> 00:05:57,618
Where's Dr. Bombay?
103
00:05:58,314 --> 00:05:59,489
Bom's away.
104
00:06:00,534 --> 00:06:02,362
Bom's away?
105
00:06:02,362 --> 00:06:06,322
That's what I call him.
"Bom" for short.
106
00:06:06,322 --> 00:06:10,544
What,
and I'll be sorry I asked,
does he call you?
107
00:06:10,544 --> 00:06:13,851
Often.
He calls me often.
108
00:06:14,635 --> 00:06:17,028
Figures.
109
00:06:17,028 --> 00:06:20,510
Now, look,
Miss Often,
when will the doctor be back?
110
00:06:20,510 --> 00:06:22,817
Any minute now.
I left him a message.
111
00:06:22,817 --> 00:06:27,125
Now I have to get back.
I'm his receptionist.
112
00:06:27,125 --> 00:06:31,565
I'm very receptive.
Bye now.
113
00:06:31,565 --> 00:06:34,568
Where is the doctor,
I wonder?
114
00:06:34,568 --> 00:06:37,658
Probably out in the cosmos,
chasing ambulances.
115
00:06:37,658 --> 00:06:41,139
He may be chasing,
but not ambulances.
116
00:06:41,139 --> 00:06:44,665
Sorry I was detained.
I'd been over at the gym,
wrestling with a problem,
117
00:06:44,665 --> 00:06:47,494
how to come to grips
with my new nurse.
118
00:06:47,494 --> 00:06:51,759
- That's a problem?
- Not really.
I'll pin her down yet.
119
00:06:51,759 --> 00:06:54,762
Dr. Bombay,
we do not find your
personal peccadilloes
120
00:06:54,762 --> 00:06:56,677
the least bit amusing.
121
00:06:56,677 --> 00:06:59,897
Oh! You peeked.
122
00:06:59,897 --> 00:07:03,684
Oh, for Pete's sake,
will somebody talk
some sense into this clown?
123
00:07:03,684 --> 00:07:07,035
I will.
My witchcraft
has gone to pot,
124
00:07:07,035 --> 00:07:08,776
and in case you
haven't noticed,
125
00:07:08,776 --> 00:07:11,909
my face is covered
with red stripes.
126
00:07:11,909 --> 00:07:14,608
Hmm! Interesting.
Very interesting.
127
00:07:14,608 --> 00:07:16,784
Well, doctor,
what do you think
the matter is?
128
00:07:16,784 --> 00:07:18,960
Obviously, her witchcraft
has gone to pot,
129
00:07:18,960 --> 00:07:20,875
and she's developed
red stripes.
130
00:07:20,875 --> 00:07:24,444
I hoped you could tell me
what disease I have.
131
00:07:24,444 --> 00:07:28,491
Judging by the symptoms,
I'd say you had
bright red stripes disease.
132
00:07:28,491 --> 00:07:31,494
- Is that serious?
- Not at all.
Just inconvenient.
133
00:07:31,494 --> 00:07:33,453
It lasts one full year.
134
00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:35,498
Dr. Bombay,
you have to do something.
135
00:07:35,498 --> 00:07:38,414
I can't walk around
with these stripes
for a year.
136
00:07:38,414 --> 00:07:40,111
The disease
lasts one full year
137
00:07:40,111 --> 00:07:41,939
unless it's cured
within 8 hours.
138
00:07:41,939 --> 00:07:44,899
Perhaps I could
find an antidote
if I knew how you got it.
139
00:07:44,899 --> 00:07:47,249
You haven't been mixing
eye of newt with oysters,
have you?
140
00:07:47,249 --> 00:07:48,990
- No.
- A-ha!
141
00:07:48,990 --> 00:07:51,645
Then there's
only one other way
you could have got it.
142
00:07:51,645 --> 00:07:54,691
Have you been recently
on the western slopes
of the Himalayas?
143
00:07:54,691 --> 00:07:57,651
Lately,
I haven't been any further
than a P.T.A. meeting.
144
00:07:59,827 --> 00:08:03,657
The drink. She had a drink
with a Himalayan
cinnamon stick.
145
00:08:03,657 --> 00:08:05,659
A-ha! Then that's it.
146
00:08:05,659 --> 00:08:09,445
Eons ago, the Tibetan monks
cross-pollinated a rare herb
with Himalayan cinnamon,
147
00:08:09,445 --> 00:08:12,187
and used it
to drive the witches
out of the Himalayas.
148
00:08:12,187 --> 00:08:14,972
I didn't know
there were any witches
in the Himalayas.
149
00:08:14,972 --> 00:08:17,497
There aren't. It worked.
[LAUGHING]
150
00:08:17,497 --> 00:08:20,108
Now, doctor,
about the eight-hour deadline.
151
00:08:20,108 --> 00:08:22,327
Never fear,
Bombay is here.
152
00:08:22,327 --> 00:08:24,373
I shall feed
this information
153
00:08:24,373 --> 00:08:27,898
into my ultra-vascular,
self-denominating
powered trichoscope
154
00:08:27,898 --> 00:08:31,293
with, of course,
the super-duper diagnostic
predictor attachment.
155
00:08:31,989 --> 00:08:33,295
[BEEPING]
156
00:08:36,211 --> 00:08:37,560
[BELL DINGING]
157
00:08:37,560 --> 00:08:40,041
A-ha!
There is an antidote.
158
00:08:40,041 --> 00:08:43,000
A simple potion.
You can pick it up
from your apothecary.
159
00:08:44,132 --> 00:08:47,135
We start with, uh,
eye of condor.
160
00:08:49,485 --> 00:08:50,878
Powdered snakeskin.
161
00:08:52,227 --> 00:08:53,750
Fig newts.
162
00:08:53,750 --> 00:08:56,405
- Fig newts?
- That's the way
the cookie crumbles.
163
00:08:56,405 --> 00:08:58,102
[LAUGHING]
164
00:08:58,102 --> 00:09:01,845
One pint of unicorn milk.
Non-fat.
165
00:09:01,845 --> 00:09:05,545
And a toasted cheese sandwich
on rye.
166
00:09:05,545 --> 00:09:09,461
- Toasted cheese?
- That's for me.
I'm starved.
167
00:09:09,461 --> 00:09:12,508
Hagatha,
have the apothecary
fill out this prescription,
168
00:09:12,508 --> 00:09:15,206
give it to Samantha,
and she'll be
as right as rain.
169
00:09:15,206 --> 00:09:17,339
And now,
if you'll excuse me,
170
00:09:17,339 --> 00:09:20,429
I want to try out
my new wrestling mat
on my nurse.
171
00:09:20,429 --> 00:09:23,301
It's the only one
in the universe
with "welcome" on it.
172
00:09:23,301 --> 00:09:26,000
[LAUGHING]
173
00:09:28,393 --> 00:09:29,394
[GROANS]
174
00:09:32,310 --> 00:09:34,269
Well, what are you
waiting for?
175
00:09:34,269 --> 00:09:37,925
Oh, I refuse to go near
that dirty old druggist.
176
00:09:37,925 --> 00:09:41,145
Uh, but, Samantha,
I'd be glad to zap you there.
177
00:09:42,494 --> 00:09:45,193
Thanks a bunch.
178
00:09:45,193 --> 00:09:47,935
Well,
maybe my red stripes
will turn him off.
179
00:09:47,935 --> 00:09:49,284
Zap away.
180
00:09:54,376 --> 00:09:55,377
[SAM CLEARS THROAT]
181
00:09:56,465 --> 00:09:58,598
Oh, hi, cutie.
182
00:09:59,207 --> 00:10:01,035
Say, them stripes...
183
00:10:01,035 --> 00:10:03,733
Mmm-mmm!
They really turn me on.
184
00:10:05,126 --> 00:10:07,215
Well, I certainly
called that one.
185
00:10:07,215 --> 00:10:11,436
Uh, look, Mr. Druggist,
I have a prescription... Please don't call me that.
186
00:10:11,436 --> 00:10:15,179
I'm apothecary
to the entire cosmos.
187
00:10:15,832 --> 00:10:17,312
Excuse me.
188
00:10:17,312 --> 00:10:19,923
Uh, look, Mr. Apothecary,
I have a prescription...
189
00:10:19,923 --> 00:10:24,536
Yeah, I started out
to be a friendly
neighborhood druggist,
190
00:10:24,536 --> 00:10:28,062
but I couldn't find
a friendly neighborhood.
191
00:10:28,062 --> 00:10:31,413
I couldn't find
a friendly neighborhood,
you get it?
192
00:10:31,413 --> 00:10:34,068
Oh, yes,
I get it.
And it's a howler,
193
00:10:34,068 --> 00:10:36,940
but what I really came to get
was this prescription filled.
194
00:10:36,940 --> 00:10:39,551
Well,
I got this one
here ahead of you.
195
00:10:39,551 --> 00:10:41,771
But this is an emergency.
196
00:10:41,771 --> 00:10:45,166
Oh, well.
Maybe I can hurry things up
197
00:10:45,166 --> 00:10:49,736
if you're willing
to consider this
a friendly neighborhood.
198
00:10:49,736 --> 00:10:52,042
Uh, not that friendly.
199
00:10:52,042 --> 00:10:57,178
- What are you brewing?
- It's a love potion, cutie.
200
00:10:57,178 --> 00:11:00,094
Care to share a jigger
or two with me?
201
00:11:00,094 --> 00:11:02,662
Uh, no, thanks.
202
00:11:02,662 --> 00:11:06,709
Now,
you can have it straight
or with a chaser.
203
00:11:06,709 --> 00:11:11,409
- What's the chaser?
- You're looking at him, cutie.
204
00:11:24,509 --> 00:11:27,251
I need a little potion
of my own, on the rocks.
205
00:11:28,035 --> 00:11:29,863
[EXCLAIMS]
206
00:11:29,863 --> 00:11:32,039
I wish you'd watch
where you're going.
207
00:11:32,039 --> 00:11:34,258
I wish you'd watch
where you're popping.
208
00:11:34,258 --> 00:11:36,043
No need to get huffy.
209
00:11:36,043 --> 00:11:39,786
I came back because
my trusty computer
overlooked one ingredient.
210
00:11:39,786 --> 00:11:41,831
But Sam's already gone
to the apothecary.
211
00:11:41,831 --> 00:11:45,139
No matter. The apothecary
does not carry
the necessary ingredient.
212
00:11:45,139 --> 00:11:46,618
Why? What is it?
213
00:11:46,618 --> 00:11:48,664
The tail feather
of a dodo bird.
214
00:11:48,664 --> 00:11:51,536
A dodo bird?
Why, they're extinct.
215
00:11:51,536 --> 00:11:55,453
Not only that,
there haven't been any around
for millions of years.
216
00:11:55,453 --> 00:11:57,151
Well, then
how do you expect us
217
00:11:57,151 --> 00:11:58,979
to get a dodo bird's
tail feather?
218
00:11:58,979 --> 00:12:01,633
How should I know?
I'm a doctor,
not a bird-watcher.
219
00:12:01,633 --> 00:12:05,376
Though I will say,
a bird in the hand is worth
two in the Australian bush.
220
00:12:05,376 --> 00:12:06,987
[LAUGHING]
221
00:12:12,775 --> 00:12:14,124
Take five!
222
00:12:15,169 --> 00:12:16,736
[GROANING]
223
00:12:16,736 --> 00:12:19,216
You're too old
for all this exercise.
224
00:12:19,216 --> 00:12:22,654
I know,
but even at my age...
225
00:12:22,654 --> 00:12:24,047
I got you![EXCLAIMS]
226
00:12:24,047 --> 00:12:25,788
Even at my age,
227
00:12:25,788 --> 00:12:30,445
you fill my veins
with the hot blood of youth.
228
00:12:30,445 --> 00:12:32,926
You fill my heart
with desire.
229
00:12:32,926 --> 00:12:35,232
You fill my brain
with passion.
230
00:12:35,232 --> 00:12:38,453
While you're filling up,
how about filling
this prescription?
231
00:12:38,453 --> 00:12:43,501
Oh, all right, but first,
how's about a little kiss?
232
00:12:43,501 --> 00:12:45,765
How about a nice,
friendly handshake?
233
00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:49,246
What's come over
this younger generation?
234
00:12:49,246 --> 00:12:51,771
When I was a boy sorcerer,
235
00:12:51,771 --> 00:12:55,470
all the witch chicks
flocked around me.
236
00:12:56,558 --> 00:13:00,431
[SIGHING]
That was a long time ago.
237
00:13:01,563 --> 00:13:04,044
I'll fill your prescription.
238
00:13:04,044 --> 00:13:05,785
Yeah, when I was a kid...
239
00:13:08,265 --> 00:13:11,007
"Toasted cheese on rye"?
240
00:13:11,007 --> 00:13:13,575
Now, what's that supposed
to cure?
241
00:13:13,575 --> 00:13:15,664
Dr. Bombay.
He's hungry.
242
00:13:15,664 --> 00:13:19,320
Oh, I'm hungry, too,
but not for any
toasted cheese.
243
00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:20,582
You know what I mean?
244
00:13:20,582 --> 00:13:23,106
Uh, yes,
I get your message,
245
00:13:23,106 --> 00:13:26,544
but what I would really like
is that prescription.
246
00:13:26,544 --> 00:13:28,024
All right.
247
00:13:28,024 --> 00:13:32,376
I got a special
on the giant economy size,
248
00:13:32,376 --> 00:13:34,988
in case you ever
get the same disease.
249
00:13:36,337 --> 00:13:38,426
Bite your tongue.
250
00:13:40,428 --> 00:13:41,603
Mmm.
251
00:13:41,603 --> 00:13:43,431
Ugh.
252
00:13:43,431 --> 00:13:47,261
- How do I look?
- Like a dream walking.
253
00:13:47,261 --> 00:13:49,785
- Are my stripes gone?
- No.
254
00:13:49,785 --> 00:13:53,702
Maybe you better pop me home.
I have a pooped popper.
255
00:13:53,702 --> 00:13:57,532
One kiss, honey bun,
and then I will.
256
00:13:57,532 --> 00:13:59,795
Well,
if that's the going price.
257
00:13:59,795 --> 00:14:02,885
One smackeroo,
that's the going price.
258
00:14:02,885 --> 00:14:04,495
Okay.
259
00:14:04,495 --> 00:14:06,062
Going. Going.
260
00:14:07,977 --> 00:14:09,109
Gone.
261
00:14:11,633 --> 00:14:15,071
They just can't
keep their lips off of me.
262
00:14:15,680 --> 00:14:17,291
[LAUGHS]
263
00:14:19,641 --> 00:14:21,773
[EXCLAIMS]
264
00:14:21,773 --> 00:14:24,646
- Did you get the potion?
- Yes, and it didn't work.
265
00:14:24,646 --> 00:14:27,344
That's because Bombay left out
one ingredient.
266
00:14:27,344 --> 00:14:29,564
Oh, terrific.
267
00:14:29,564 --> 00:14:33,785
I know I'll be sorry I asked,
but, uh, which one?
268
00:14:33,785 --> 00:14:36,136
The tail feather
of a dodo bird.
269
00:14:37,485 --> 00:14:39,095
I'm sorry I asked.
270
00:14:43,621 --> 00:14:45,972
- Sam!
- Now what?
271
00:14:48,322 --> 00:14:49,758
[GASPS]
272
00:14:49,758 --> 00:14:51,978
Oh, my stars!
273
00:14:52,761 --> 00:14:54,502
Where's Aunt Hagatha?
274
00:14:54,502 --> 00:14:56,808
Upstairs,
checking on Adam.
275
00:14:56,808 --> 00:15:00,029
Sam, where are we going to
find the tail feather
of a dodo bird?
276
00:15:01,335 --> 00:15:05,208
Well,
I don't know.
But I'll think of something.
277
00:15:09,865 --> 00:15:11,823
Aunt Hagatha,
278
00:15:11,823 --> 00:15:15,740
I wish you'd talk
to the Witches' Council
about replacing that quack.
279
00:15:15,740 --> 00:15:17,612
I'll make a note.
280
00:15:17,612 --> 00:15:21,268
The tail feather
of a dodo bird.
This is ridiculous.
281
00:15:21,268 --> 00:15:24,532
Wait a minute.
Maybe not.
282
00:15:24,532 --> 00:15:27,491
Aunt Hagatha,
for Tabitha's last birthday,
283
00:15:27,491 --> 00:15:29,537
Mother gave her
a cosmos coloring book.
284
00:15:29,537 --> 00:15:32,540
Now, I think
there's a picture
of a dodo bird in it.
285
00:15:32,540 --> 00:15:35,282
Why don't you pop upstairs
and take a look?
286
00:15:35,282 --> 00:15:38,111
And if there is,
zap the bird out of the book.
287
00:15:38,111 --> 00:15:39,808
Of course, Samantha.
288
00:15:42,419 --> 00:15:44,291
What a shame.
289
00:15:44,291 --> 00:15:46,597
What do you mean,
"What a shame?"
290
00:15:46,597 --> 00:15:49,252
Well, your aunt Hagatha's
going to zap a dodo bird
291
00:15:49,252 --> 00:15:51,559
out of Tabitha's
cosmos coloring book
292
00:15:51,559 --> 00:15:53,213
so we can get
a tail feather
293
00:15:53,213 --> 00:15:55,780
to get rid
of your horizontal
and vertical red stripes.
294
00:15:55,780 --> 00:15:57,695
Why did you say
"What a shame"?
295
00:15:57,695 --> 00:15:59,915
Well,
it's a pretty wild trip,
296
00:15:59,915 --> 00:16:03,223
and it's kind of sad
I'll never be able
to tell anybody about it.
297
00:16:03,223 --> 00:16:05,181
[DODO QUACKING][HAGATHA EXCLAIMING]
298
00:16:05,181 --> 00:16:07,792
Get away from me,
you dirty old bird!
299
00:16:07,792 --> 00:16:10,839
Mr. Stephens,
I suggest you get
the tail feather yourself.
300
00:16:10,839 --> 00:16:12,623
I'm not going near
that dirty bird.
301
00:16:12,623 --> 00:16:15,670
Well, how am I supposed
to get a tail feather
out of that thing?
302
00:16:15,670 --> 00:16:17,715
Well, I suppose
a rear attack is in order.
303
00:16:17,715 --> 00:16:19,848
That's the part you're after.
Good luck.
304
00:16:19,848 --> 00:16:22,242
[QUACKING]
305
00:16:36,865 --> 00:16:38,562
[DARRIN GRUNTING]
306
00:16:38,562 --> 00:16:40,912
Sam! Sam, you better
get out of sight.
307
00:16:40,912 --> 00:16:43,828
If anyone comes along,
I might be able
to explain the bird,
308
00:16:43,828 --> 00:16:45,395
but how would I explain you?
309
00:16:52,663 --> 00:16:55,144
Here, birdie.
Here, birdie, birdie, birdie.
310
00:16:57,799 --> 00:16:59,279
[DODO QUACKING]
311
00:17:01,933 --> 00:17:04,197
Will you come on down here,
you rotten bird?
312
00:17:06,068 --> 00:17:07,330
[CAR APPROACHING]
313
00:17:14,642 --> 00:17:15,947
What's the matter?
314
00:17:18,907 --> 00:17:20,865
[DODO QUACKING]
315
00:17:26,219 --> 00:17:28,177
- What do you make of it?
- I don't know.
316
00:17:28,177 --> 00:17:29,831
Is it a bird?
317
00:17:29,831 --> 00:17:32,529
Well, if it's a bird,
it's the biggest
bird I've ever seen.
318
00:17:32,529 --> 00:17:34,357
Should we get out
and investigate?
319
00:17:34,357 --> 00:17:36,272
You get out
and investigate.
320
00:17:36,272 --> 00:17:38,057
I'm not going
anywhere near it.
321
00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:40,146
Uh, maybe
we better call in.
322
00:17:40,146 --> 00:17:41,190
Good suggestion.
323
00:17:44,628 --> 00:17:47,544
This is car 953.
Car 953.
Do you read me?
324
00:17:48,328 --> 00:17:50,330
Come in, Car 953.
325
00:17:50,330 --> 00:17:52,810
We're in front of a house
on Morning Glory Circle,
326
00:17:52,810 --> 00:17:55,378
and we want
to report a, um...[DODO QUACKING]
327
00:17:55,378 --> 00:17:56,814
Uh...
328
00:17:58,164 --> 00:18:00,992
Bad suggestion.
You describe it.
329
00:18:00,992 --> 00:18:02,864
MAN: [ON RADIO]
You want to report a what?
330
00:18:02,864 --> 00:18:05,606
Uh, nothing.
It's just something
we thought we saw
331
00:18:05,606 --> 00:18:08,130
that we realized
- we didn't see.
- MAN: What?
332
00:18:08,130 --> 00:18:11,220
Over and out.
Let's go have a beer.
333
00:18:11,220 --> 00:18:12,656
Good suggestion.
334
00:18:24,233 --> 00:18:25,495
[QUACKING]
335
00:18:39,074 --> 00:18:40,771
DARRIN:
Now, listen,
you dumb dodo.
336
00:18:40,771 --> 00:18:44,253
Either you're
coming down here,
or I'm coming up to get you.
337
00:18:44,253 --> 00:18:45,907
[QUACKING]
338
00:18:51,565 --> 00:18:53,480
[GRUNTING]
339
00:18:53,480 --> 00:18:55,786
Okay,
if that's the way
you want to play.
340
00:18:58,049 --> 00:18:59,616
[EXCLAIMING]
341
00:19:04,882 --> 00:19:06,275
[QUACKING]
342
00:19:14,805 --> 00:19:16,285
[DARRIN GRUNTING]
343
00:19:27,818 --> 00:19:29,342
[DARRIN YELLING]
344
00:19:35,826 --> 00:19:38,046
[GRUNTING]
I got it! I got it!
345
00:19:38,046 --> 00:19:40,353
Sweetheart!
Are you all right?
346
00:19:40,353 --> 00:19:44,270
Uh, yeah, in fact,
if I hadn't't grabbed
that bird by the tail,
347
00:19:44,270 --> 00:19:46,533
I would have fallen
off that roof headfirst.
348
00:19:46,533 --> 00:19:48,926
That dumb bird saved my life.
349
00:19:48,926 --> 00:19:52,974
I knew there was something
I didn't like
about that bird.
350
00:19:52,974 --> 00:19:56,586
Aunt Hagatha,
will you just zap him
back into the book?
351
00:19:56,586 --> 00:19:59,807
HAGATHA:
Thank you for your feather,
dodo, dear.
352
00:19:59,807 --> 00:20:02,418
Now, back to the book.
Get out of here.
353
00:20:02,810 --> 00:20:04,028
[QUACKS]
354
00:20:16,911 --> 00:20:18,608
Here's looking
at you.
355
00:20:22,395 --> 00:20:23,874
[COUGHS]
356
00:20:37,105 --> 00:20:40,064
Dr. Bombay,
you're 0 for 2.
357
00:20:40,064 --> 00:20:42,850
Appear at once,
or you are through.
358
00:20:42,850 --> 00:20:44,504
I hope
this is important.
359
00:20:44,504 --> 00:20:47,115
I was engaged
in a very crucial
chess match.
360
00:20:47,115 --> 00:20:49,465
That's what you wear
to play chess?
361
00:20:49,465 --> 00:20:51,946
It is when I'm tackling
my nurse.
[LAUGHS]
362
00:20:53,339 --> 00:20:55,079
Samantha,
you naughty little witch,
363
00:20:55,079 --> 00:20:56,777
you haven't
taken your potion.
364
00:20:56,777 --> 00:20:59,780
Yes, I have.
And I'm running out
of patience.
365
00:20:59,780 --> 00:21:03,087
- You and me both.
- Doctor, you're a disgrace
to your profession.
366
00:21:03,740 --> 00:21:05,351
What profession?
367
00:21:05,351 --> 00:21:07,570
Well, if you're
going to harass me,
I'll leave.
368
00:21:07,570 --> 00:21:09,311
Oh, now, now,
wait a minute.
369
00:21:09,311 --> 00:21:11,661
Lay off him.
He's the only one we've got.
370
00:21:11,661 --> 00:21:14,882
Thank you, Samantha.
I don't understand
what could have gone wrong.
371
00:21:14,882 --> 00:21:16,797
You followed
my directions precisely?
372
00:21:16,797 --> 00:21:20,191
- Yes.
- That's probably
what went wrong.
373
00:21:20,191 --> 00:21:22,585
You got the tail feather
of a dodo bird?
374
00:21:22,585 --> 00:21:25,762
Oh, yes.
And I've got
the scars to prove it.
375
00:21:25,762 --> 00:21:28,287
And you followed
my directions?
You got the potion.
376
00:21:28,287 --> 00:21:30,027
You put in the tail feather.
377
00:21:30,027 --> 00:21:34,597
You mixed slowly
so as not to bruise
the Himalayan cinnamon stick...
378
00:21:34,597 --> 00:21:37,252
You didn't mention
the Himalayan cinnamon stick.
379
00:21:37,252 --> 00:21:39,950
Of course, I did.
It's the most
important ingredient.
380
00:21:39,950 --> 00:21:41,822
It's not only essential
to the potion,
381
00:21:41,822 --> 00:21:43,911
It provides
the necessary antitoxin.
382
00:21:43,911 --> 00:21:48,611
You did not say anything
about the Himalayan
cinnamon stick!
383
00:21:48,611 --> 00:21:50,961
- I must have.
- You didn't.
384
00:21:51,745 --> 00:21:53,921
- Do you have witnesses?
- Yes.
385
00:21:55,618 --> 00:21:58,186
In that case, it's obvious
I didn't mention it.
386
00:21:58,186 --> 00:22:00,319
And having done so,
I shall leave.
387
00:22:02,930 --> 00:22:08,022
There goes one
of the great quack pots
of all time.
388
00:22:08,022 --> 00:22:11,895
Speaking of time,
how much time
do we have left?
389
00:22:11,895 --> 00:22:16,900
Well, he said we had
eight hours, so that
leaves us about an hour.
390
00:22:16,900 --> 00:22:18,772
Fong's is closed...
391
00:22:18,772 --> 00:22:21,514
I can't get hold
of Mr. Fong.
392
00:22:21,514 --> 00:22:24,691
Sam,
I may get arrested
for what I'm about to do,
393
00:22:25,866 --> 00:22:27,520
but I'm about to do it.
394
00:22:29,913 --> 00:22:31,828
But what about bail?
395
00:22:31,828 --> 00:22:35,528
Bail is set at $150.
Pay the clerk.
396
00:22:35,528 --> 00:22:37,138
It's cheap
at twice the price.
397
00:22:38,618 --> 00:22:40,881
I got it! I got it!
398
00:22:40,881 --> 00:22:42,143
SAM:
How did you manage?
399
00:22:42,143 --> 00:22:44,014
How? Oh, it was easy.
400
00:22:44,014 --> 00:22:46,539
I got arrested
and posted $150 bail.
401
00:22:46,539 --> 00:22:49,237
- What?
- But it doesn't matter.
402
00:22:49,237 --> 00:22:50,978
Let's see if it works
this time.
403
00:22:50,978 --> 00:22:53,284
Oh, well, okay.
404
00:22:53,763 --> 00:22:55,025
Ew.
405
00:23:03,033 --> 00:23:05,949
Excuse us, folks.
406
00:23:05,949 --> 00:23:08,387
We would like
to ask you some questions.
407
00:23:19,049 --> 00:23:22,879
[CLEARS THROAT]
I, uh...
Uh, yes, officers?
408
00:23:22,879 --> 00:23:25,404
What's wrong
with your face, lady?
409
00:23:25,404 --> 00:23:27,884
My husband wanted to see
what I look like in stripes.
410
00:23:31,061 --> 00:23:33,107
What can we do for you?
411
00:23:33,107 --> 00:23:35,283
Well, we saw something
on your roof earlier,
412
00:23:35,283 --> 00:23:36,980
and we'd like to ask you
about it.
413
00:23:37,372 --> 00:23:39,287
Oh?
414
00:23:39,287 --> 00:23:43,073
Yes, it was, uh, um...
Well, it was
a pretty big, uh...
415
00:23:44,814 --> 00:23:46,425
Tell them, Charlie.
416
00:23:46,425 --> 00:23:48,862
Well,
it was sort of a, uh...
417
00:23:49,471 --> 00:23:51,125
Uh...
418
00:23:51,125 --> 00:23:53,823
There hasn't been
anyone on our roof
since the TV repairman.
419
00:23:53,823 --> 00:23:56,696
Oh.
Does he have feathers?
420
00:23:56,696 --> 00:23:59,176
I don't know.
I haven't seen him
in some time.
421
00:24:01,527 --> 00:24:04,268
Well, what we thought we saw
was a pretty strange...
422
00:24:04,268 --> 00:24:06,793
Uh, uh...
423
00:24:06,793 --> 00:24:09,056
Well, Fred here
thought it was a bird.
424
00:24:09,056 --> 00:24:11,885
What's so strange
about seeing a bird
on a roof?
425
00:24:11,885 --> 00:24:13,930
Well,
this was no ordinary bird.
426
00:24:13,930 --> 00:24:17,673
- No?
- No. No, no, no.
It was more like a, uh...
427
00:24:18,282 --> 00:24:19,762
Uh...
428
00:24:19,762 --> 00:24:21,764
Tell them, Fred.
429
00:24:21,764 --> 00:24:24,724
Well, it was a...
It was a great, big bird.
430
00:24:24,724 --> 00:24:28,641
- How big?
- Well,
you may not believe this,
431
00:24:28,641 --> 00:24:30,991
but, uh, it was almost
as big as a...
432
00:24:30,991 --> 00:24:32,645
As what?
433
00:24:32,645 --> 00:24:34,211
Tell them, Charlie.
434
00:24:37,780 --> 00:24:39,695
Where did your stripes go?
435
00:24:42,263 --> 00:24:43,394
What stripes?
436
00:24:46,572 --> 00:24:49,749
Now, you were saying,
the bird was as big as what?
437
00:24:49,749 --> 00:24:51,707
Oh, nothing.
Nothing. No...
438
00:24:51,707 --> 00:24:53,753
Uh, sorry to bother you.
439
00:24:53,753 --> 00:24:56,016
We didn't see anything,
right, Fred?
440
00:24:56,016 --> 00:24:58,235
Right. Right.
We're sorry
for the intrusion.
441
00:25:02,544 --> 00:25:03,850
[SIGHS]
442
00:25:15,209 --> 00:25:17,211
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]