1 00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:07,000 Downloaded from YTS.MX 2 00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:13,000 Official YIFY movies site: YTS.MX 3 00:02:20,015 --> 00:02:21,516 Thank you. 4 00:02:31,243 --> 00:02:33,162 I'm looking for Mr. Taggart. 5 00:02:33,412 --> 00:02:34,780 I'm Mr. Taggart. 6 00:02:34,997 --> 00:02:37,582 Oh, you must be... 7 00:02:37,583 --> 00:02:39,084 Terry? No. 8 00:02:39,085 --> 00:02:41,086 Henry. Yes. 9 00:02:41,087 --> 00:02:42,587 I'm Shirley. 10 00:02:42,588 --> 00:02:43,588 How do you do? 11 00:02:44,090 --> 00:02:45,091 Is Tom anywhere about? 12 00:02:45,591 --> 00:02:48,093 Oh, yes. He's on plot four. 13 00:02:48,594 --> 00:02:49,594 Thanks. 14 00:02:49,595 --> 00:02:52,347 Oh, may I leave my case here? Yes. 15 00:02:59,890 --> 00:03:02,975 Excuse me, miss, uh, Shirley. 16 00:03:02,976 --> 00:03:04,360 Is Tom expecting you? 17 00:03:04,778 --> 00:03:06,613 Oh, didn't he tell you? What? 18 00:03:06,897 --> 00:03:09,482 He should have told you. 19 00:03:09,483 --> 00:03:12,485 I'm Shirley Blaire, Tom's fiancee. 20 00:03:12,486 --> 00:03:13,904 See you later. 21 00:03:30,838 --> 00:03:35,225 What are you doing that for? 22 00:03:35,226 --> 00:03:37,844 Well, someone's got to do it. They're moving in tonight. 23 00:03:37,845 --> 00:03:42,850 Well, where's George Hanson? I had to send him home. His wife's sick. 24 00:03:45,653 --> 00:03:47,938 Why doesn't anything fit in these rotten houses? 25 00:03:47,939 --> 00:03:51,108 What's the matter with that mate of his... Jimmy what's-his-name? 26 00:03:51,109 --> 00:03:53,412 I had to send him over to plot nine. 27 00:03:53,913 --> 00:03:55,413 Staircase is coming away from the wall. 28 00:03:55,414 --> 00:03:58,784 Oh. Moving staircase. 29 00:04:02,454 --> 00:04:04,756 Here. Do you know Tom's got a girl with him? 30 00:04:04,924 --> 00:04:07,927 She says she's his fiancee. She says what? 31 00:04:08,210 --> 00:04:10,712 Well, that's what she said. She's got a suitcase with her. 32 00:04:12,631 --> 00:04:14,633 I'll break his bloody neck! 33 00:04:16,101 --> 00:04:17,185 Tom! 34 00:04:19,856 --> 00:04:20,856 Tom! 35 00:04:22,025 --> 00:04:23,443 Tom! Tom? 36 00:04:25,478 --> 00:04:29,064 What are you doing with that bird? Tom, get out of it! 37 00:04:30,567 --> 00:04:32,569 Tom? 38 00:04:33,069 --> 00:04:34,069 Tom! 39 00:04:36,406 --> 00:04:40,910 That two-faced, conniving little bastard! 40 00:04:41,411 --> 00:04:43,412 Where are you going? I'm going to warn Karen. 41 00:04:43,413 --> 00:04:44,914 I'll see you at mum's. 42 00:04:44,915 --> 00:04:47,918 But what about the floorboards? Stuff the floorboards! 43 00:04:49,420 --> 00:04:50,920 Night, guv. 44 00:04:50,921 --> 00:04:53,923 Oh, what about a bit of overtime, Charlie? No, not tonight, guv. 45 00:04:53,924 --> 00:04:55,925 Fred? I'm sorry, Mr. Taggart. 46 00:04:55,926 --> 00:04:57,927 I'm taking the old woman to the dogs. 47 00:04:57,928 --> 00:05:01,431 Tell the boss lady happy birthday. Eh? 48 00:05:01,432 --> 00:05:03,933 Your mum. Tell her happy birthday from the lads. 49 00:05:03,934 --> 00:05:05,935 It's not her birthday. It's her anniversary. 50 00:05:05,936 --> 00:05:07,938 Happy anniversary, then. 51 00:05:08,439 --> 00:05:09,439 Night, guv. 52 00:05:09,440 --> 00:05:10,942 See you in the morning, guv. 53 00:05:41,774 --> 00:05:44,276 I was just closing. Oh, I'm sorry. 54 00:05:59,325 --> 00:06:01,744 There we are. 55 00:06:03,247 --> 00:06:05,248 I did them up all nice. 56 00:06:05,249 --> 00:06:07,750 They're for an occasion, aren't they? My mother's anniversary. 57 00:06:07,751 --> 00:06:08,752 Thank you. 58 00:06:18,178 --> 00:06:21,681 Wish her a happy anniversary from me. Oh, thank you. 59 00:06:22,683 --> 00:06:24,151 Thank you. 60 00:06:44,923 --> 00:06:45,924 Oh. 61 00:07:06,061 --> 00:07:08,062 What do you think of the place? 62 00:07:08,063 --> 00:07:11,566 Well, it's nice. Very nice. 63 00:07:11,567 --> 00:07:13,535 Did you and your brothers build it? 64 00:07:13,536 --> 00:07:15,571 Come off it. We wouldn't live in anything we built. 65 00:07:16,071 --> 00:07:17,572 Oh, we did the conversions. 66 00:07:17,573 --> 00:07:19,073 Well? 67 00:07:19,074 --> 00:07:21,576 What do you think of me? You look great. 68 00:07:30,470 --> 00:07:32,972 How about popping upstairs for a quick one? 69 00:07:32,973 --> 00:07:34,974 No, we won't. 70 00:07:34,975 --> 00:07:39,478 No more quick ones. And not here, either. 71 00:07:39,479 --> 00:07:41,981 We're engaged. We're going to be married. 72 00:07:41,982 --> 00:07:44,483 We can do it in comfort now. 73 00:07:44,484 --> 00:07:47,486 You'll just have to contain yourself. 74 00:07:47,487 --> 00:07:50,491 Anyway, I came here to meet your mum. Remember? 75 00:07:51,993 --> 00:07:53,994 I remember. 76 00:07:53,995 --> 00:07:56,997 Have you learned your party piece, then? What? 77 00:07:56,998 --> 00:07:58,999 A turn. We all do a turn. 78 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:02,502 You know, sing a song, recite. Play the piano. 79 00:08:02,503 --> 00:08:05,422 Well, I'm not going to do a turn. Mum won't like it. 80 00:08:05,790 --> 00:08:08,375 Your mum will have to lump it, won't she? 81 00:08:08,376 --> 00:08:11,878 And you'll tell her, will you? She'll not get me doing anything. 82 00:08:11,879 --> 00:08:13,881 She'll be livid. 83 00:08:14,299 --> 00:08:18,386 She can throw that pot at me, for all I care. And she probably will. 84 00:08:18,387 --> 00:08:21,889 Then I'll jolly well throw it back at her. 85 00:08:21,890 --> 00:08:23,858 That's my girl. 86 00:08:26,395 --> 00:08:27,896 No, Tom, don't. 87 00:08:28,397 --> 00:08:30,398 What's the matter? 88 00:08:30,399 --> 00:08:31,399 Will she? 89 00:08:31,400 --> 00:08:32,900 Will she what? 90 00:08:32,901 --> 00:08:34,402 Throw the pot at me? 91 00:08:34,903 --> 00:08:36,904 Well, she doesn't like not getting her own way. 92 00:08:36,905 --> 00:08:39,407 Seems to bring out the femininity in her. 93 00:08:39,408 --> 00:08:43,912 I always wondered why you never asked me home to meet your mum. Now I know. 94 00:08:43,913 --> 00:08:45,914 Kept thinking she was some sort of criminal 95 00:08:45,915 --> 00:08:47,916 or couldn't keep off the gin. 96 00:08:47,917 --> 00:08:50,752 I never guessed it was because she might start throwing pots at me. 97 00:08:50,753 --> 00:08:53,138 I'm sure she won't. 98 00:08:53,139 --> 00:08:54,590 Have you been joking, then? 99 00:08:54,591 --> 00:08:57,426 Depends what you think's funny, doesn't it? 100 00:08:57,427 --> 00:09:00,345 Well, I don't think that is. 101 00:09:00,346 --> 00:09:02,181 I'm full of nerves as it is. 102 00:09:02,432 --> 00:09:05,517 Anyway, if you do see her going for that pot, 103 00:09:05,518 --> 00:09:07,520 just grab one of these things in here. 104 00:09:07,521 --> 00:09:09,022 That'll make her drop it. 105 00:09:09,023 --> 00:09:10,523 Why, that ugly thing? 106 00:09:10,524 --> 00:09:13,526 Ugly? That's a thing of beauty to my mum. 107 00:09:13,527 --> 00:09:19,032 I might have won it in a fair, but it's the equivalent of the crown jewels in here. 108 00:09:19,033 --> 00:09:22,035 Mum's treasures. 109 00:09:22,036 --> 00:09:24,037 That's my first tooth, 110 00:09:24,038 --> 00:09:25,078 Henry's one and only curl, 111 00:09:25,539 --> 00:09:28,041 and Terry's nappie, all beyond price 112 00:09:28,042 --> 00:09:30,043 'cause mum's got "nostalgiaitis" in both legs. 113 00:09:30,044 --> 00:09:32,545 Aw, was it his little egg cup, then? 114 00:09:32,546 --> 00:09:35,549 That's mum's. She bought it on her fifth birthday. 115 00:09:35,550 --> 00:09:37,552 Her very first purchase. 116 00:09:38,553 --> 00:09:40,938 Ooh! Your dad must have been clever. 117 00:09:40,939 --> 00:09:43,440 Dad? Yes. All these certificates. 118 00:09:43,441 --> 00:09:45,442 They're mine and my brothers'. 119 00:09:45,443 --> 00:09:47,394 You're clever. 120 00:09:47,395 --> 00:09:50,948 Master Thomas, third prize Bible studies. 121 00:09:50,949 --> 00:09:53,951 Master Terence, second prize for the best loser. 122 00:09:53,952 --> 00:09:56,453 And master Henry, first prize 123 00:09:56,454 --> 00:09:58,455 for consistent imbecility. 124 00:09:58,456 --> 00:09:59,958 I give you fair warning. 125 00:09:59,959 --> 00:10:02,410 You mock all this at your peril. 126 00:10:02,411 --> 00:10:04,963 I'm looking forward to meeting your mum. 127 00:10:10,386 --> 00:10:12,887 Oh, hello, Tom. 128 00:10:12,888 --> 00:10:14,389 Shirley, you've met Henry, 129 00:10:14,390 --> 00:10:16,841 the eldest surviving male Taggart. 130 00:10:16,842 --> 00:10:19,894 You are surviving, aren't you, Henry? 131 00:10:19,895 --> 00:10:21,846 You know mum'll be here shortly. 132 00:10:21,847 --> 00:10:23,898 Does it matter? Shirley's staying. 133 00:10:23,899 --> 00:10:26,402 Oh. In the guest room. 134 00:10:26,403 --> 00:10:28,655 Oh. Mum didn't say. 135 00:10:28,939 --> 00:10:30,523 Mum doesn't know. 136 00:10:31,024 --> 00:10:33,526 I thought your mum had invited me. I didn't say that, love. 137 00:10:33,527 --> 00:10:37,997 Tom, this means she's being imposed upon. I don't see why. 138 00:10:37,998 --> 00:10:40,950 You can't have someone stay in your own house and not know about it. 139 00:10:40,951 --> 00:10:43,703 Shirley's right. You should have told mum. 140 00:10:45,005 --> 00:10:48,257 Do you think I should go? Yes, I do, really. 141 00:10:48,258 --> 00:10:51,344 She's not leaving. You're not leaving, Shirley. 142 00:10:51,345 --> 00:10:53,964 You're asking too much of Shirley. 143 00:10:53,965 --> 00:10:57,300 Well, you can't ask too much from someone who loves you. 144 00:10:57,301 --> 00:10:58,769 Ah, now, that's sweet. 145 00:10:59,771 --> 00:11:02,273 Isn't that sweet, Henry? 146 00:11:05,276 --> 00:11:06,777 I'm going to go and change. 147 00:11:07,195 --> 00:11:10,281 Come and have a look at the kitchen. 148 00:11:14,652 --> 00:11:17,454 Look, Tom, if this is a family affair... 149 00:11:17,455 --> 00:11:19,991 If you love me like you say you do, 150 00:11:19,992 --> 00:11:21,993 you've got to stay and see it out. 151 00:11:21,994 --> 00:11:25,496 You make it sound like an endurance test or something. 152 00:11:25,497 --> 00:11:29,000 Well, uh, what do you think of all this, then? 153 00:11:29,501 --> 00:11:32,003 Your mum does know we're engaged, doesn't she? 154 00:11:32,004 --> 00:11:33,305 I'm telling her tonight. 155 00:11:33,505 --> 00:11:36,508 I suppose she doesn't know about the baby, either. 156 00:11:36,809 --> 00:11:39,261 She'll know it all tonight. 157 00:11:41,513 --> 00:11:43,064 Tom! 158 00:11:47,404 --> 00:11:50,489 Right. Now go and sit down at that table, will you? 159 00:11:50,490 --> 00:11:51,990 Both of you. 160 00:11:51,991 --> 00:11:53,492 Sit down, Jane. Go on. 161 00:11:53,493 --> 00:11:57,496 Now then. You go here. 162 00:11:57,497 --> 00:12:00,499 Pet, now don't start crying. 163 00:12:00,500 --> 00:12:03,001 You've been such a good boy. 164 00:12:03,002 --> 00:12:06,505 There you are. There you are, darling. 165 00:12:06,506 --> 00:12:09,066 Now I don't want a word out of any of you until Nanna comes down. 166 00:12:09,292 --> 00:12:12,378 Oh, hi, Tom. Hello, love. Karen, this is Shirley. 167 00:12:12,379 --> 00:12:14,380 Shirley, Karen. Hello. 168 00:12:14,381 --> 00:12:19,269 You're going to be one in the eye for her ladyship. Come on. In you go. 169 00:12:19,270 --> 00:12:21,771 Look, you treacherous bas... what's... 170 00:12:21,772 --> 00:12:23,273 Go on there. 171 00:12:23,274 --> 00:12:25,275 I want words with you. What's the matter? 172 00:12:25,276 --> 00:12:28,278 You know what's the matter. Come on. Sit down there, Jake. 173 00:12:28,279 --> 00:12:31,281 Go on! All right. There, love. 174 00:12:31,282 --> 00:12:33,284 All right? 175 00:12:33,651 --> 00:12:35,486 Hello. What's your name? 176 00:12:40,158 --> 00:12:41,242 Oh, darling. 177 00:12:41,243 --> 00:12:44,745 Now don't move a muscle, any of you. 178 00:12:44,746 --> 00:12:46,580 Keep him quiet, dawn, will you? 179 00:12:46,581 --> 00:12:48,966 I have a good mind to fling you through that door! 180 00:12:49,468 --> 00:12:52,470 It wouldn't hurt. It's one of your doors, all glue and matches. 181 00:12:52,471 --> 00:12:54,472 You're not telling her tonight. I am. 182 00:12:54,473 --> 00:12:56,975 I'm having my say first. I'm telling her about me, first, 183 00:12:57,476 --> 00:12:59,977 then you can detonate your floozy in her face. No, you don't. 184 00:12:59,978 --> 00:13:02,480 I want to be here when that happens. I'll pick my moment. 185 00:13:02,481 --> 00:13:04,483 Yeah, I'll bet you will. 186 00:13:04,484 --> 00:13:06,485 Where's Henry? Changing. 187 00:13:06,486 --> 00:13:08,404 It's nearly time, isn't it? 188 00:13:10,273 --> 00:13:11,773 Oh, hello, Karen, Terry. 189 00:13:11,774 --> 00:13:13,776 Mum's coming down. 190 00:13:23,619 --> 00:13:27,122 ♪ 191 00:13:38,635 --> 00:13:40,636 ♪ Oh ♪ 192 00:13:40,637 --> 00:13:42,605 ♪ how we danced ♪ 193 00:13:42,606 --> 00:13:45,141 ♪ on the night ♪ 194 00:13:45,142 --> 00:13:47,643 ♪ we were wed ♪ 195 00:13:47,644 --> 00:13:49,645 ♪ we vowed ♪ 196 00:13:49,646 --> 00:13:51,648 ♪ our true love ♪ 197 00:13:52,065 --> 00:13:54,067 ♪ though a word ♪ 198 00:13:54,368 --> 00:13:57,871 ♪ wasn't said ♪ 199 00:13:57,872 --> 00:13:59,790 ♪ the world ♪ 200 00:13:59,791 --> 00:14:02,292 ♪ was in bloom ♪ 201 00:14:02,293 --> 00:14:04,795 ♪ there were stars ♪ 202 00:14:04,796 --> 00:14:07,081 ♪ in the skies ♪ 203 00:14:07,332 --> 00:14:09,416 ♪ except ♪ 204 00:14:09,417 --> 00:14:11,919 ♪ for the few ♪ bloody hell. 205 00:14:11,920 --> 00:14:13,221 ♪ That were there ♪ 206 00:14:13,504 --> 00:14:15,584 Happy anniversary, mum. Thank you, darlings. 207 00:14:20,061 --> 00:14:21,646 Oh, my dear! 208 00:14:24,149 --> 00:14:26,935 They're so lovely. 209 00:14:29,271 --> 00:14:30,572 Who died? 210 00:14:33,158 --> 00:14:35,159 How do you do, my dear? 211 00:14:35,160 --> 00:14:37,161 You're not one of Karen's, are you? 212 00:14:37,162 --> 00:14:40,532 How can she be one of mine, mum? She don't look like Terry. 213 00:14:40,866 --> 00:14:43,251 Could have had her before Terry. 214 00:14:43,452 --> 00:14:44,535 Shirley, this is my mother. 215 00:14:44,536 --> 00:14:47,338 How do you do? Happy anniversary, Mrs. Taggart. 216 00:14:49,092 --> 00:14:51,594 Would you like her to stay, Tommy? She is staying. 217 00:14:51,795 --> 00:14:54,798 That's just what I said, dear. Would you like her to stay? 218 00:14:55,131 --> 00:14:57,133 Yes, mother. 219 00:15:02,138 --> 00:15:04,139 Oh, thank you. 220 00:15:04,140 --> 00:15:08,527 I've always liked this. That's why I gave it to you last year for Christmas. 221 00:15:11,448 --> 00:15:14,318 Where are my grandchildren? They're in the kitchen, mum. 222 00:15:14,535 --> 00:15:17,154 Well, why aren't the little darlings in here? 223 00:15:17,405 --> 00:15:20,541 'Cause last time you thumped him when they threw up all over the carpet. 224 00:15:22,043 --> 00:15:25,579 Henry, go and keep them company. There's a dear. Yes. 225 00:15:30,384 --> 00:15:34,004 Do you like it, mum? Yes, dear. It's just what I wanted! 226 00:15:36,891 --> 00:15:40,478 At least he knows how to handle children. 227 00:15:40,479 --> 00:15:44,732 Hope he has some of his own one day. He deserves it. I didn't know he was married. 228 00:15:44,733 --> 00:15:48,569 Youngsters. Anyone over 20, and he's ready for burning. 229 00:15:48,570 --> 00:15:50,771 Henry's pushing 40, mum. 230 00:15:50,772 --> 00:15:54,859 He happens to be waiting for the right girl, Karen, 231 00:15:54,860 --> 00:15:57,279 not like some I know who'll marry the first tart 232 00:15:57,779 --> 00:16:00,114 who winks them into the nearest bed. 233 00:16:00,115 --> 00:16:02,250 Eh, Terry? No. 234 00:16:05,203 --> 00:16:08,173 What do you think of Henry, Shirley? I thought he was very nice. 235 00:16:08,508 --> 00:16:12,594 He'd have been an ambassador by now if he'd joined the diplomatic corps. 236 00:16:12,595 --> 00:16:15,847 That's true. Took him ages when he left school, deciding between 237 00:16:15,848 --> 00:16:17,766 the diplomatic corps and being a plumber. 238 00:16:21,220 --> 00:16:25,223 We don't have to ask who this is from, do we, Tommy? 239 00:16:25,224 --> 00:16:27,226 Let me show you how it works. 240 00:16:30,730 --> 00:16:33,734 I love it! Let me have a go. 241 00:16:39,573 --> 00:16:43,459 Are the children staying? Why? Do you want 'em to stay, then, mum? 242 00:16:43,460 --> 00:16:45,995 Who's going to look after them? My mother. 243 00:16:45,996 --> 00:16:47,830 I see. 244 00:16:47,831 --> 00:16:51,167 Five minutes with me and five hours with her. 245 00:16:51,168 --> 00:16:54,504 I'd like to see my grandchildren occasionally, Terry. 246 00:16:54,505 --> 00:16:55,972 They're, uh, waiting for you, mum. 247 00:16:55,973 --> 00:16:58,257 Waiting to see what I bought them? 248 00:16:58,258 --> 00:17:01,061 Well, what have you bought them, then, mum? 249 00:17:01,062 --> 00:17:04,181 You see, Shirley, no subtleties with Karen. 250 00:17:04,482 --> 00:17:07,568 "What have you bought them?" 251 00:17:07,569 --> 00:17:09,821 If you want to know, I'm giving them money. 252 00:17:10,021 --> 00:17:12,106 Oh, good idea. Then they can buy what they like. 253 00:17:12,490 --> 00:17:15,075 I've already bought it. 254 00:17:15,076 --> 00:17:17,078 I'm putting the money in trust funds 255 00:17:17,579 --> 00:17:19,414 so no one can get their hands on it. 256 00:17:21,332 --> 00:17:25,420 They're impatient. I know. 257 00:17:25,421 --> 00:17:28,791 I've had three chicks of my own. 258 00:17:29,125 --> 00:17:32,210 Only three, I Grant you, Karen, 259 00:17:32,211 --> 00:17:34,712 but natural good manners told me 260 00:17:34,713 --> 00:17:36,715 when to put the plug in. 261 00:17:43,022 --> 00:17:47,526 Welcome to the family. 262 00:17:49,645 --> 00:17:52,615 How do you find your future mother-in-law? 263 00:17:52,866 --> 00:17:55,235 Well, she's... 264 00:17:55,452 --> 00:17:58,037 I always leave here with a screaming headache, 265 00:17:58,455 --> 00:18:02,709 and my whole body shaking with murder and hate. 266 00:18:03,710 --> 00:18:05,711 But... 267 00:18:05,712 --> 00:18:08,214 Not for long now. 268 00:18:08,215 --> 00:18:10,717 We'll soon be out of it, won't we, love? Oh. Yeah. 269 00:18:11,134 --> 00:18:14,670 Where you going, then? Canada. 270 00:18:17,174 --> 00:18:19,176 Where we should have gone years ago. 271 00:18:19,177 --> 00:18:22,179 Yeah, but my trouble is, I don't like hurting her. 272 00:18:22,180 --> 00:18:24,932 You're scared witless of the old bag. 273 00:18:25,433 --> 00:18:28,435 At least I've got some consideration, which is more than I can say for you. 274 00:18:28,436 --> 00:18:31,438 Fancy dragging your floozy here tonight. Tonight's mum's night. 275 00:18:31,439 --> 00:18:34,941 She's going to do her bloody nut when she finds out about you and her. 276 00:18:34,942 --> 00:18:36,943 So when are you going to tell her that you're emigrating? 277 00:18:36,944 --> 00:18:40,447 Yeah, well. That's different. I've got to give her a week's notice. 278 00:18:40,448 --> 00:18:42,449 You could have told her yesterday or last week. 279 00:18:42,450 --> 00:18:44,952 No, you're going to tell her tonight. Stop getting at Terry. 280 00:18:44,953 --> 00:18:47,455 He's sensitive. Well, Tom's sensitive, too. 281 00:18:47,456 --> 00:18:50,458 We're not talking about being ticklish in the long grass, Shirley. 282 00:18:50,459 --> 00:18:54,462 I am sensitive. I'll not going to stand here and see you being ridiculed! 283 00:18:54,463 --> 00:18:55,964 Ah, poor Terry. Don't be rude, Tom! 284 00:18:56,465 --> 00:18:59,433 I'm not being rude! Ah, shut up, the lot of you! 285 00:18:59,434 --> 00:19:01,969 You're like a pack of wolves, snapping away at nothing! 286 00:19:01,970 --> 00:19:05,523 It's this bloody house! Five minutes inside it, and... 287 00:19:05,941 --> 00:19:10,396 And-and everybody gets a-screaming... 288 00:19:10,647 --> 00:19:13,232 He's right, you know. Yes, he is. 289 00:19:13,233 --> 00:19:16,735 It makes you want to scratch and draw blood. 290 00:19:16,736 --> 00:19:20,239 It ought to be pulled down or burned. 291 00:19:20,240 --> 00:19:22,241 Yeah. Now there's a thought. 292 00:19:22,242 --> 00:19:25,712 Pour petrol over it. Start a bloody great fire! Where's mum, Tom? 293 00:19:26,129 --> 00:19:28,213 She's in bed sleeping peacefully, 294 00:19:28,214 --> 00:19:31,217 and the flames are licking away at her legs. She thinks old dad's returned! 295 00:19:31,718 --> 00:19:34,219 Tom, she's your mum! 296 00:19:34,220 --> 00:19:36,222 It's only a game, love. 297 00:19:36,724 --> 00:19:38,675 No, it's not. 298 00:19:42,763 --> 00:19:46,149 Here you are... darling. 299 00:19:52,773 --> 00:19:53,773 Thank you, gran. 300 00:19:57,578 --> 00:19:59,613 Now... it's your turn. 301 00:20:33,115 --> 00:20:37,118 When's the wedding? 302 00:20:37,119 --> 00:20:38,620 Hmm? 303 00:20:38,621 --> 00:20:41,623 Little miss bag of bones. 304 00:20:41,624 --> 00:20:43,124 How did you know? 305 00:20:43,125 --> 00:20:45,627 I didn't. You just told me. 306 00:20:45,628 --> 00:20:48,129 I don't know anything about it, mum. 307 00:20:48,130 --> 00:20:51,132 He just said they were engaged. Mmm. 308 00:20:51,133 --> 00:20:52,634 She seems a nice enough girl. 309 00:20:52,635 --> 00:20:56,138 I'm sure she is, for someone else's son. 310 00:20:56,139 --> 00:20:58,641 I'm tired of playing nursemaid. 311 00:20:58,642 --> 00:21:00,644 Let's get this lot out of here. 312 00:21:02,145 --> 00:21:04,647 Come on, children. Out to the car. 313 00:21:04,648 --> 00:21:06,649 We're going home! 314 00:21:06,650 --> 00:21:09,152 We're going home! Come on! 315 00:21:11,989 --> 00:21:13,572 Come on. Hurry up. Run. 316 00:21:13,573 --> 00:21:16,075 I can't run any faster. 317 00:21:16,076 --> 00:21:20,079 - I beat you down the garden. - Wait for me, then! 318 00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:24,084 I know what to do. 319 00:21:24,085 --> 00:21:26,086 Take them home, Karen, 320 00:21:26,087 --> 00:21:28,088 or they'll wreck the car. 321 00:21:28,089 --> 00:21:29,089 They're lovely, 322 00:21:29,090 --> 00:21:30,590 but quite exhausting. 323 00:21:30,591 --> 00:21:34,094 The baby's making me feel quite faint. Nonsense. 324 00:21:34,095 --> 00:21:35,595 Oh, shut up! 325 00:21:35,596 --> 00:21:36,597 I'll take them home. 326 00:21:37,015 --> 00:21:38,966 It's not convenient, Terry. 327 00:21:39,267 --> 00:21:40,685 Shall I take them, then? 328 00:21:40,935 --> 00:21:43,020 Ah. 329 00:21:43,021 --> 00:21:46,357 Henry, the world's a better place for having you around. Oh. 330 00:21:46,641 --> 00:21:49,027 No messing about. Come straight home. 331 00:21:55,651 --> 00:21:57,069 Move up. Come on. 332 00:21:58,954 --> 00:22:00,789 Here you are. Here are the keys. 333 00:22:05,327 --> 00:22:07,412 You behave yourselves with uncle Henry. 334 00:22:07,413 --> 00:22:09,748 Look, mum. Look what gran gave us. 335 00:22:10,049 --> 00:22:12,084 Yeah. Lovely. 336 00:22:12,468 --> 00:22:14,553 There are times, Shirley, 337 00:22:14,554 --> 00:22:17,056 I'm sorry we're not Roman Catholics. 338 00:22:17,057 --> 00:22:20,559 Henry would make a lovely pope. 339 00:22:20,560 --> 00:22:21,978 "Henry the humble." 340 00:22:26,683 --> 00:22:28,767 I wish you wouldn't give them pocket money. 341 00:22:28,768 --> 00:22:32,771 They'll only buy ice cream, and they got their ration for today. 342 00:22:32,772 --> 00:22:35,691 Ration? What you preparing them for, 343 00:22:35,692 --> 00:22:37,276 the next war? 344 00:22:37,277 --> 00:22:39,112 Do they sleep in the underground 345 00:22:39,412 --> 00:22:41,782 and wear gas masks around the house? 346 00:22:41,949 --> 00:22:44,368 You're a hard mother, Karen, very hard. 347 00:22:44,668 --> 00:22:48,588 That's how I want their teeth to be, mum. Good and hard. 348 00:22:48,839 --> 00:22:52,876 Now don't put words in my mouth. I didn't say "good." 349 00:22:53,260 --> 00:22:55,211 I don't think you are a good mother, 350 00:22:55,546 --> 00:22:58,098 but it's not my place to say so. 351 00:22:59,550 --> 00:23:01,468 Ice cream is very bad for teeth. 352 00:23:10,529 --> 00:23:11,947 Come here, my dear. 353 00:23:29,080 --> 00:23:32,133 Let me take a good look at you. 354 00:23:37,306 --> 00:23:38,807 Tommy's taste is changing. 355 00:23:39,225 --> 00:23:40,809 He used to like a lot of flesh. 356 00:23:41,227 --> 00:23:43,229 You wouldn't fetch much on the butcher's slab. 357 00:23:45,982 --> 00:23:47,900 Is she sleeping in the guest room, Tommy? 358 00:23:48,234 --> 00:23:49,768 That's the general idea, mum. 359 00:23:51,737 --> 00:23:53,739 I've been meaning to buy a new bed. 360 00:23:54,240 --> 00:23:55,524 When Tom has guests, 361 00:23:55,741 --> 00:23:57,776 I never get a good night's sleep. 362 00:23:58,110 --> 00:23:59,695 All that creaking. 363 00:23:59,696 --> 00:24:02,198 But then, he has so much energy, 364 00:24:02,199 --> 00:24:04,618 he has to use it up somehow. 365 00:24:08,121 --> 00:24:09,589 Thank you. 366 00:24:11,542 --> 00:24:12,960 We're going to be married. 367 00:24:13,293 --> 00:24:15,295 Will it be a white wedding, my dear? 368 00:24:20,184 --> 00:24:21,718 Yes. Yes, it will. 369 00:24:23,220 --> 00:24:27,558 How many bridesmaids, two? All in yellow? 370 00:24:27,559 --> 00:24:29,526 And they'll each carry a bouquet 371 00:24:29,527 --> 00:24:32,312 and you'll carry a prayer book? 372 00:24:32,313 --> 00:24:34,064 And the bells will ring ting-a-ling, 373 00:24:34,566 --> 00:24:36,568 and you'll be so happy? 374 00:24:37,068 --> 00:24:40,037 And we'll all be so very sympathetic 375 00:24:40,038 --> 00:24:43,207 when Tommy doesn't turn up. 376 00:24:43,208 --> 00:24:45,459 Isn't it about time we changed the subject? 377 00:24:45,460 --> 00:24:47,911 You hate not being in the spotlight, don't you? 378 00:24:47,912 --> 00:24:51,916 We haven't noticed you for two minutes. 379 00:24:51,917 --> 00:24:54,919 Never seen such a strong face. 380 00:24:54,920 --> 00:24:56,421 Granite. 381 00:24:56,422 --> 00:25:00,925 The face of a man who's suffered and come through it all. Am I right, Karen? 382 00:25:00,926 --> 00:25:03,511 I should say he's still suffering, wouldn't you, mum? 383 00:25:03,729 --> 00:25:07,315 You think you failed him, do you dear? 384 00:25:09,318 --> 00:25:11,737 At least you're honest about it. 385 00:25:14,657 --> 00:25:17,159 Elwood double-four-double-nine. 386 00:25:18,662 --> 00:25:19,662 Yes. 387 00:25:25,085 --> 00:25:29,588 Oh, that's very bad, isn't it? Almost criminal negligence. 388 00:25:29,589 --> 00:25:31,374 I'll send someone over right away. 389 00:25:33,209 --> 00:25:34,209 One of you 390 00:25:34,377 --> 00:25:36,962 forgot to put the kitchen floorboards down 391 00:25:36,963 --> 00:25:37,964 in plot 10. 392 00:25:38,381 --> 00:25:39,799 They're moving in. 393 00:25:40,050 --> 00:25:41,101 Look after it, Terry. 394 00:25:43,053 --> 00:25:45,855 What, now? Well, tomorrow will be soon enough. 395 00:25:45,856 --> 00:25:48,275 We seem to be getting a lot of complaints lately. 396 00:25:48,276 --> 00:25:52,696 I've told you why. It's that clause you've got in all the contracts... 397 00:25:52,697 --> 00:25:55,115 50 quid off the price for every day we're behind schedule. 398 00:25:55,116 --> 00:25:57,150 That's known as a good selling point. 399 00:25:57,151 --> 00:26:01,154 No, it's not. It's bloody ridiculous. We're flogging ourselves to death 400 00:26:01,155 --> 00:26:04,458 just trying not to be fined, and you won't bring in extra staff. 401 00:26:04,709 --> 00:26:07,161 Bring in more staff and our standards will go down. 402 00:26:07,461 --> 00:26:08,962 That would be difficult. 403 00:26:09,297 --> 00:26:12,217 We can't keep up the pace, mum. It's crippling us. 404 00:26:14,553 --> 00:26:16,755 Shirley, my dear. 405 00:26:17,139 --> 00:26:18,673 Would you mind sitting somewhere else? 406 00:26:18,674 --> 00:26:20,592 Body odor offends me. 407 00:26:22,594 --> 00:26:25,096 I haven't got body odor! 408 00:26:32,070 --> 00:26:35,072 Terry, you won't feel this way 409 00:26:35,073 --> 00:26:36,525 once you've moved. 410 00:26:40,446 --> 00:26:42,748 Surprise. I've bought you a new house. 411 00:26:44,250 --> 00:26:45,784 Why? 412 00:26:46,169 --> 00:26:49,755 There are people who would be grateful for such news, Karen. 413 00:26:49,756 --> 00:26:52,458 You asked me why as if I were spiting you. 414 00:26:52,675 --> 00:26:55,260 You haven't paid for it yet, have you, mum? 415 00:26:55,678 --> 00:26:59,214 Next week. £15,000. 416 00:26:59,215 --> 00:27:01,517 What? 417 00:27:03,387 --> 00:27:05,305 Where's the contract, then, mother? 418 00:27:07,358 --> 00:27:09,276 With the solicitor. 419 00:27:09,526 --> 00:27:11,528 Watch her, Terry. She's fishing. 420 00:27:11,895 --> 00:27:13,396 Shut up, Tom. 421 00:27:14,815 --> 00:27:17,316 £15,000 pounds, eh, love? 422 00:27:17,317 --> 00:27:20,153 [Sheepishly[ What about that, then? 423 00:27:24,708 --> 00:27:28,211 It's... it's very kind of you mum. Very kind, indeed. 424 00:27:28,212 --> 00:27:29,714 Ask to see the contract. 425 00:27:30,131 --> 00:27:31,715 I had you summed up 426 00:27:32,217 --> 00:27:34,084 the moment you poked your head out. 427 00:27:34,085 --> 00:27:36,887 "This one's a Thomas," I said. 428 00:27:36,888 --> 00:27:39,674 And I was right. Right! 429 00:27:44,396 --> 00:27:47,064 Well, Terry, are you going to please your mother 430 00:27:47,065 --> 00:27:49,933 on her anniversary and accept the house? 431 00:27:49,934 --> 00:27:53,320 Well, as I said, mum, it's very kind of you. 432 00:27:53,321 --> 00:27:55,824 Very kind, indeed. Tell her, Terry. 433 00:27:55,825 --> 00:27:57,325 Tell me what? 434 00:27:57,326 --> 00:27:59,327 Uh, nothing, mum. Nothing at all. 435 00:27:59,328 --> 00:28:01,830 She wants to know, so tell her. 436 00:28:01,831 --> 00:28:05,333 Well, I can't tell her now, not after just being offered a house. 437 00:28:05,334 --> 00:28:07,335 Is there something I should know? 438 00:28:07,336 --> 00:28:09,838 No, mum. No, no. It's just that, uh... 439 00:28:09,839 --> 00:28:11,840 Well, Karen and me, we were thinking... 440 00:28:11,841 --> 00:28:13,209 We've arranged it! 441 00:28:13,459 --> 00:28:15,377 Arranged what, my precious? 442 00:28:15,678 --> 00:28:17,763 It could always be canceled, couldn't it, love? 443 00:28:18,264 --> 00:28:22,268 No, it couldn't, "my precious"! 444 00:28:22,269 --> 00:28:24,137 We're emigrating to Canada, mum. 445 00:28:28,775 --> 00:28:30,226 I knew... 446 00:28:30,727 --> 00:28:33,029 There was something. 447 00:28:33,230 --> 00:28:36,315 You've always been the same, Terry. 448 00:28:36,316 --> 00:28:38,317 Whenever you were a naughty boy, 449 00:28:38,318 --> 00:28:40,820 straight into a shell you'd go. 450 00:28:40,821 --> 00:28:42,822 Terry was never a leader, Shirley. 451 00:28:42,823 --> 00:28:44,124 He was always led. 452 00:28:44,324 --> 00:28:47,911 And now he's being led off to Canada 453 00:28:47,912 --> 00:28:50,297 by that pregnant cow over there! 454 00:28:57,054 --> 00:28:58,472 When do you think you're leaving? 455 00:29:00,424 --> 00:29:01,758 A week tomorrow. 456 00:29:03,144 --> 00:29:05,679 Have you a job to go to? Yeah. 457 00:29:06,097 --> 00:29:09,984 Doing what? Well, my trade, of course. 458 00:29:10,351 --> 00:29:11,435 Trade? 459 00:29:11,903 --> 00:29:13,187 You haven't got a trade. 460 00:29:13,404 --> 00:29:15,857 What do you mean? I'm a master carpenter. 461 00:29:16,191 --> 00:29:19,110 A carpenter? You can't hammer a nail in 462 00:29:19,328 --> 00:29:22,247 without being rushed to hospital with a broken thumb. 463 00:29:22,531 --> 00:29:25,616 Who built that broom cupboard behind the door 464 00:29:25,617 --> 00:29:28,086 so you had to walk into the kitchen sideways? 465 00:29:29,588 --> 00:29:31,673 The only thing you're good at is making shavings. 466 00:29:32,040 --> 00:29:35,543 Two weeks in Canada, and you'll be deported for sabotage. 467 00:29:35,928 --> 00:29:38,380 Come off it, mum. He's not as bad as all that. 468 00:29:38,630 --> 00:29:41,216 Of course not, 469 00:29:41,217 --> 00:29:43,602 compared to your electrical genius. 470 00:29:45,388 --> 00:29:47,973 Remember that house on church Avenue, 471 00:29:47,974 --> 00:29:51,861 when the owner pressed the switch in the lounge and the lavatory flushed? 472 00:30:00,537 --> 00:30:02,539 I thought you boys understood. 473 00:30:03,039 --> 00:30:04,039 I made you bosses 474 00:30:04,040 --> 00:30:06,543 because you weren't good enough to be workers. 475 00:30:07,044 --> 00:30:11,798 Oh, I've been criticized, but is it so wrong to protect one's own chicks? 476 00:30:12,049 --> 00:30:16,636 Mind you, I understand. It's the constant worry of working against time. 477 00:30:16,637 --> 00:30:18,638 But what's one to do, 478 00:30:18,639 --> 00:30:20,640 build fewer houses? 479 00:30:20,641 --> 00:30:23,142 That's unfair to the homeless, 480 00:30:23,143 --> 00:30:24,594 to the millions of families 481 00:30:25,145 --> 00:30:27,647 who look to us to put a roof over their heads. 482 00:30:27,648 --> 00:30:30,650 We are doing a service to the nation 483 00:30:30,651 --> 00:30:33,521 by giving people decent houses to live in. 484 00:30:33,822 --> 00:30:35,406 Get out of it! 485 00:30:35,407 --> 00:30:37,408 Our houses aren't decent. 486 00:30:37,409 --> 00:30:39,410 They're obscene! 487 00:30:39,411 --> 00:30:41,863 We're the only builders putting up condemned property. 488 00:30:42,247 --> 00:30:45,166 Your father never put up a Jerry-built house in his life. 489 00:30:45,417 --> 00:30:47,001 I'm not talking about dad. 490 00:30:47,002 --> 00:30:49,788 This business started to go rotten when he snuffed it. 491 00:30:50,038 --> 00:30:54,625 Then how do you account for the 250% profit since he died? 492 00:30:54,626 --> 00:30:58,964 Because you got us to knock out two houses in the time that it took him to build one! 493 00:30:58,965 --> 00:31:01,850 Time and motion, dear. 494 00:31:01,851 --> 00:31:03,302 Now will you shut up? 495 00:31:05,938 --> 00:31:07,856 A little thing to remember, Shirley. 496 00:31:08,057 --> 00:31:09,942 Tommy doesn't like criticism. 497 00:31:10,142 --> 00:31:12,110 Tell him he's brilliant, often. 498 00:31:12,395 --> 00:31:15,481 Terry, come and sit by me. 499 00:31:20,486 --> 00:31:21,987 Here. 500 00:31:23,990 --> 00:31:27,994 Now... why do you want to go to Canada? 501 00:31:27,995 --> 00:31:31,497 Tell mummy. She'll understand. 502 00:31:31,498 --> 00:31:35,001 Well, it-it-it's sort of wanting my independence, mum. 503 00:31:35,002 --> 00:31:37,003 Independence in a strange country, 504 00:31:37,004 --> 00:31:39,005 with a wife and six children 505 00:31:39,006 --> 00:31:41,007 and no money. 506 00:31:41,008 --> 00:31:42,508 It's-it's more than that. 507 00:31:42,509 --> 00:31:44,593 It's being part of something that's all wrong. 508 00:31:44,594 --> 00:31:47,430 We're nothing better than con men. 509 00:31:47,931 --> 00:31:50,349 Well, then we'll build fewer houses, detached houses. 510 00:31:50,350 --> 00:31:53,103 That's asking for it. What's going to keep 'em up? 511 00:31:55,273 --> 00:31:58,825 We're-we're working 12 hours a day, six days a week! It's a killer! 512 00:31:58,826 --> 00:32:02,029 Well, then we'll have an eight-hour, five-day week. 513 00:32:02,030 --> 00:32:04,414 You've said all this before, 514 00:32:04,415 --> 00:32:05,833 but it never happens! 515 00:32:06,167 --> 00:32:08,752 Why be so destructive, Karen? 516 00:32:08,753 --> 00:32:11,254 Be constructive for a change. 517 00:32:11,255 --> 00:32:15,208 I'll give it to you in writing, witnessed by the house of lords. 518 00:32:15,593 --> 00:32:18,046 It's not just the work, mum. Then what? 519 00:32:18,380 --> 00:32:20,799 Well, it's... 520 00:32:22,134 --> 00:32:24,553 Go on. Tell her! 521 00:32:26,772 --> 00:32:29,357 Tell her! 522 00:32:30,559 --> 00:32:33,061 It's you! Me? 523 00:32:33,362 --> 00:32:35,446 You're inside him all the time, 524 00:32:35,447 --> 00:32:36,865 scratching away at his ulcer! 525 00:32:37,316 --> 00:32:38,400 Ah! 526 00:32:38,901 --> 00:32:41,402 That's more like my daughter-in-law, 527 00:32:41,403 --> 00:32:44,907 down on all fours, spitting away, 528 00:32:44,908 --> 00:32:46,409 with her whiskers quivering. 529 00:32:46,826 --> 00:32:49,912 Oh, no. 530 00:32:49,913 --> 00:32:52,915 You're hoping that I'm going to forget what we were arguing about, 531 00:32:52,916 --> 00:32:54,917 get back to the mud-slinging. 532 00:32:54,918 --> 00:32:56,919 Well, I'm not going to do that. 533 00:32:56,920 --> 00:32:59,755 Terry needs order in his life. 534 00:32:59,756 --> 00:33:02,508 All you've ever given him is chaos! 535 00:33:02,842 --> 00:33:06,428 And I'm taking him away from you. 536 00:33:14,071 --> 00:33:16,990 Elwood double-four-double-nine. 537 00:33:21,862 --> 00:33:23,363 When? 538 00:33:29,670 --> 00:33:30,670 God! 539 00:33:32,423 --> 00:33:35,175 Oh, my god! What is it, mum? 540 00:33:37,596 --> 00:33:39,597 That was the cottage hospital. 541 00:33:39,598 --> 00:33:42,851 Henry's been in a crash. The car overturned. 542 00:33:45,854 --> 00:33:47,271 What about the kids, mum? 543 00:33:47,272 --> 00:33:50,474 Poor Henry! They're operating on him. 544 00:33:50,475 --> 00:33:52,693 But the kids, mum. What about the kids? 545 00:33:52,694 --> 00:33:55,980 I'm afraid their condition is critical. 546 00:33:58,400 --> 00:34:01,452 Oh, no! How did it happen, mum? 547 00:34:01,453 --> 00:34:02,788 Didn't say. 548 00:34:03,039 --> 00:34:07,125 Oh, god, let them be all right. 549 00:34:07,126 --> 00:34:09,127 Oh, god, let them be all right! 550 00:34:09,128 --> 00:34:11,747 We'd better go down there, love. It's all my fault, Terry. 551 00:34:12,165 --> 00:34:14,749 I should have taken them. 552 00:34:14,750 --> 00:34:17,552 It's all my fault! No, no, it's not. Come on. 553 00:34:17,753 --> 00:34:19,838 I should have taken them! 554 00:34:22,842 --> 00:34:24,760 Is there anything I can do? 555 00:34:27,346 --> 00:34:29,349 I'll go up to my room. 556 00:34:33,353 --> 00:34:35,355 How bad are they, mum? 557 00:34:36,857 --> 00:34:38,324 The kids. 558 00:34:38,325 --> 00:34:41,861 What did they say about the kids? 559 00:34:41,862 --> 00:34:44,364 To lose one's children... 560 00:34:45,365 --> 00:34:48,785 Whoever would want to be a mother? 561 00:34:58,930 --> 00:35:00,430 What is it, love? What's the matter? 562 00:35:00,431 --> 00:35:02,432 Henry's here! Who? 563 00:35:02,433 --> 00:35:04,434 Henry! Where? 564 00:35:04,435 --> 00:35:05,936 In my room. 565 00:35:07,522 --> 00:35:09,106 Did you hear that, mum? 566 00:35:12,610 --> 00:35:14,612 Are you all right, love? 567 00:35:18,483 --> 00:35:21,068 Did you hear what Shirley said, mum? 568 00:35:21,069 --> 00:35:22,070 What, dear? 569 00:35:22,071 --> 00:35:24,072 She saw Henry upstairs! 570 00:35:24,073 --> 00:35:26,574 Well, he lives here, doesn't he? 571 00:35:26,575 --> 00:35:28,410 You said he was being operated on. 572 00:35:28,627 --> 00:35:30,629 A little fib, I'm afraid. 573 00:35:30,963 --> 00:35:32,998 Who was the phone call from, mum? 574 00:35:33,382 --> 00:35:36,968 That man about the floorboards again. 575 00:35:36,969 --> 00:35:39,972 I wanted Karen to find out what it's like to lose a son. 576 00:35:40,422 --> 00:35:41,422 An eye for an eye. 577 00:35:41,724 --> 00:35:44,259 That was a diabolical thing to do, mum. 578 00:35:44,643 --> 00:35:46,177 I don't agree. 579 00:35:46,178 --> 00:35:49,231 I hope it's taught her a lesson. 580 00:35:49,232 --> 00:35:52,652 Then I won't have to hear any more about my Terry leaving. 581 00:35:59,609 --> 00:36:01,660 It's almost time to leave for the party. 582 00:36:01,661 --> 00:36:04,113 I booked the table for 9:00. 583 00:36:10,453 --> 00:36:12,955 Something the matter, my dear? 584 00:36:12,956 --> 00:36:14,424 It's Henry. 585 00:36:14,425 --> 00:36:16,459 What about Henry? 586 00:36:16,460 --> 00:36:19,462 He's in my room. 587 00:36:19,463 --> 00:36:22,465 He's dressed himself up in my clothes. 588 00:36:22,466 --> 00:36:24,467 You should take that as a compliment. 589 00:36:24,468 --> 00:36:27,470 He only wears clothes that are clean and pretty. 590 00:36:27,471 --> 00:36:29,973 Very particular, is my Henry. 591 00:36:31,475 --> 00:36:33,977 Get that stuff off, Henry! 592 00:36:33,978 --> 00:36:34,979 There's a dear! 593 00:36:35,396 --> 00:36:38,481 You can't go to dinner dressed like that! 594 00:36:38,482 --> 00:36:41,902 You know nylon brings you out in a rash! 595 00:37:00,973 --> 00:37:04,308 I was a bit like you at the time, Shirley, 596 00:37:04,309 --> 00:37:06,311 wanting to fall through the floor 597 00:37:06,312 --> 00:37:07,730 when someone looked at me, 598 00:37:08,064 --> 00:37:09,432 fumbling with words, 599 00:37:09,599 --> 00:37:13,685 not very pretty, either, but my husband, bless him, 600 00:37:13,686 --> 00:37:14,686 he could see. 601 00:37:14,687 --> 00:37:17,489 Unlike you, I had one magical quality... 602 00:37:17,690 --> 00:37:18,741 A sense of humor. 603 00:37:19,108 --> 00:37:21,193 "Delicious," he called it. 604 00:37:21,194 --> 00:37:23,196 "A delicious sense of humor." 605 00:37:23,696 --> 00:37:25,030 I've still got it, of course. 606 00:37:25,281 --> 00:37:28,250 I can feel it wafting over us, like poison gas. 607 00:37:28,534 --> 00:37:33,122 It's not funny, mum. She was crying her eyes out when I left her at home. 608 00:37:33,123 --> 00:37:35,041 Wanting your sympathy, I suppose. 609 00:37:35,342 --> 00:37:37,344 You're not eating, dear. 610 00:37:37,711 --> 00:37:39,796 You're upset. 611 00:37:39,797 --> 00:37:41,799 Karen should be here. 612 00:37:43,300 --> 00:37:44,801 Sorry I'm late. 613 00:37:46,804 --> 00:37:48,805 You shouldn't have come. Changed my mind. 614 00:37:48,806 --> 00:37:51,307 Don't want to leave you alone for her to get at you. 615 00:37:51,308 --> 00:37:55,111 In five minutes you'd be begging not to be sent to Canada. 616 00:37:56,363 --> 00:37:57,697 I'm not hungry. 617 00:37:57,698 --> 00:38:00,617 The children are all right. 618 00:38:00,618 --> 00:38:03,537 You should be thrilled there's nothing wrong with them. 619 00:38:03,872 --> 00:38:07,659 A glass of wine will put you to rights. Terry, pour her a glass of wine. 620 00:38:08,076 --> 00:38:11,161 Here we all are together. 621 00:38:11,162 --> 00:38:13,914 Your father would be so happy to see us like this, 622 00:38:14,132 --> 00:38:18,719 a family united by bonds of love so strong. 623 00:38:19,220 --> 00:38:21,221 Which one of you is Taggart? 624 00:38:21,222 --> 00:38:23,223 There are three of them. Take your pick. 625 00:38:23,224 --> 00:38:27,062 Oh, well, which one of you didn't put my floorboards down? 626 00:38:27,063 --> 00:38:29,647 I've got the whole family with me, I've driven all the way from Scotland, 627 00:38:29,648 --> 00:38:31,099 and there are no floorboards in my kitchen! 628 00:38:31,100 --> 00:38:33,768 They're half-down. Was you, was it? 629 00:38:33,769 --> 00:38:35,570 Well, half isn't good enough. 630 00:38:35,571 --> 00:38:38,573 I didn't have time to finish them. Get over there. Finish them now. 631 00:38:38,574 --> 00:38:41,326 I'm having my dinner. What about my dinner? 632 00:38:41,327 --> 00:38:43,495 My wife and kids can't even get into the kitchen! 633 00:38:43,496 --> 00:38:45,364 Well, I'll fix them tomorrow. 634 00:38:45,865 --> 00:38:48,032 I want them fixed tonight. 635 00:38:48,033 --> 00:38:50,285 Go on, Terry. Go fix his floorboards. 636 00:38:50,286 --> 00:38:54,457 If you hadn't screwed up the wiring, we wouldn't have had to pull the bloody things up! 637 00:38:54,458 --> 00:38:57,176 The wiring's all right. It's the floorboards he's complaining about. 638 00:38:57,177 --> 00:39:00,596 Yeah. I'm not fixing any floorboards tonight! 639 00:39:00,597 --> 00:39:03,933 Buzz off, or I'll punch you in the face. The diplomatic touch. 640 00:39:03,934 --> 00:39:05,434 You keep out of this! 641 00:39:05,435 --> 00:39:07,637 Are you going to buzz off? You gonna make me? 642 00:39:07,854 --> 00:39:09,939 Yeah. I'm gonna make you. Just you try it. 643 00:39:09,940 --> 00:39:12,442 All right. You just try. 644 00:39:12,809 --> 00:39:15,061 I'm not afraid of a chap your size! Watch it, Matey. 645 00:39:15,395 --> 00:39:20,451 I don't want to hurt you. The floorboards in the kitchen! I want them fixed! 646 00:39:20,618 --> 00:39:23,570 Look, I've done 12 hours work today! 647 00:39:23,571 --> 00:39:25,906 I don't care about your floorboards! 648 00:39:30,962 --> 00:39:33,965 ♪ 649 00:39:52,267 --> 00:39:54,769 Happy anniversary, madam. Thank you, Carlo. 650 00:39:54,770 --> 00:39:55,771 Thank you. 651 00:40:00,359 --> 00:40:01,943 Thank you. 652 00:40:01,944 --> 00:40:02,944 Mr. Bird. 653 00:40:05,113 --> 00:40:08,699 I'm afraid my son is a little distraught this evening. I tell you what we'll do. 654 00:40:08,700 --> 00:40:11,036 Go collect your family and bring them here for dinner... 655 00:40:11,337 --> 00:40:14,289 As my guests, of course, and while you're here, 656 00:40:14,624 --> 00:40:18,127 I'll have your floorboards put down. How does that sound to you? 657 00:40:18,461 --> 00:40:20,429 You're going to put them down tonight? 658 00:40:20,713 --> 00:40:22,631 Not personally, of course. 659 00:40:22,882 --> 00:40:24,466 Oh, no. So... 660 00:40:24,467 --> 00:40:27,770 I bring all my family here, and-and you pay? 661 00:40:27,971 --> 00:40:31,474 Exactly. I'll reserve a table for you. How many are you? 662 00:40:31,774 --> 00:40:33,108 Nine. 663 00:40:34,694 --> 00:40:38,982 Oh, well, off you go, Mr. Bird, and pick them all up. 664 00:40:39,200 --> 00:40:42,236 Oh, thank you, ma'am. Think nothing of it. 665 00:40:45,706 --> 00:40:49,710 It's a great pity you haven't inherited some of your mother's kindness. 666 00:40:52,046 --> 00:40:57,383 Nine. Who would have thought a little squirt like that would have seven children? 667 00:40:57,384 --> 00:40:59,719 Do you know what this lot's going to cost me? 668 00:40:59,720 --> 00:41:03,007 Yeah. Well, I'm still not laying any floorboards tonight. 669 00:41:05,510 --> 00:41:06,894 Henry... 670 00:41:07,095 --> 00:41:08,679 Go and fix the floorboards. 671 00:41:08,680 --> 00:41:10,982 I want them all to creak. 672 00:41:11,149 --> 00:41:12,567 How will I do that? 673 00:41:14,436 --> 00:41:17,906 Just do your usual job. They'll creak. 674 00:41:20,525 --> 00:41:21,609 Now... 675 00:41:26,114 --> 00:41:27,949 You've forgotten something, mum. 676 00:41:30,286 --> 00:41:32,588 I made my wish. 677 00:41:49,472 --> 00:41:51,557 Oh. 678 00:41:52,558 --> 00:41:55,561 I beg your pardon. 679 00:41:55,562 --> 00:41:59,065 I just wanted to bring these back before I went out. 680 00:41:59,066 --> 00:42:00,567 Thank you. 681 00:42:04,071 --> 00:42:07,540 Where shall I put them? Uh... 682 00:42:07,541 --> 00:42:10,076 Well, anywhere. On-on the bed. 683 00:42:15,082 --> 00:42:16,583 I'd like to apologize. 684 00:42:18,001 --> 00:42:19,585 I would have said something before, 685 00:42:19,586 --> 00:42:23,557 but the restaurant didn't seem quite the right place. 686 00:42:23,558 --> 00:42:26,093 It's all right. 687 00:42:26,094 --> 00:42:29,096 Anyway, we've all got our little... 688 00:42:29,097 --> 00:42:31,598 Idiosyncrasies. 689 00:42:31,599 --> 00:42:33,567 That the right word? 690 00:42:36,070 --> 00:42:40,524 It's a very nice word, Shirley. And it's very kind of you to look at it like that. 691 00:42:42,994 --> 00:42:46,830 I must have given you quite a turn, coming in on you like I did. 692 00:42:46,831 --> 00:42:49,167 Well, you're right there, Shirley. 693 00:42:49,168 --> 00:42:53,539 I mean, you can't help feeling a bit guilty, being found with someone else's clothes on. 694 00:42:55,541 --> 00:42:57,542 No, I'm sure you can't. 695 00:42:57,543 --> 00:42:58,926 I apologize. 696 00:42:58,927 --> 00:43:03,631 Good lord. It's not you who should be apologizing. It's me. 697 00:43:06,435 --> 00:43:10,388 The fact is, once I get the urge, I just can't stop my... 698 00:43:10,389 --> 00:43:11,389 Idiosyncrasy. 699 00:43:15,228 --> 00:43:17,229 I know it's none of my business, 700 00:43:17,230 --> 00:43:19,615 but have you ever thought of going to see a psychiatrist? 701 00:43:22,535 --> 00:43:24,536 I don't really see the point. 702 00:43:24,537 --> 00:43:26,956 It's not as though I do anyone any harm, is it? 703 00:43:27,374 --> 00:43:28,825 Except yourself. 704 00:43:30,710 --> 00:43:32,711 Well, I look at it like this, Shirley. 705 00:43:32,712 --> 00:43:34,713 If I didn't... 706 00:43:34,714 --> 00:43:37,716 Do... what I do... 707 00:43:37,717 --> 00:43:41,671 Well, there's no saying what I might... do. 708 00:43:41,672 --> 00:43:44,224 You see what I mean? 709 00:43:44,225 --> 00:43:45,726 I suppose so. 710 00:43:47,728 --> 00:43:49,146 I liked your slip. 711 00:43:50,564 --> 00:43:52,982 It came from marks & Spencers, didn't it? Yes. 712 00:43:52,983 --> 00:43:55,435 I've got a lot of marks & Spencers. 713 00:43:55,436 --> 00:43:57,854 Yes. They're very nice. 714 00:43:57,855 --> 00:43:59,690 Good value for money. 715 00:44:08,950 --> 00:44:11,452 You've got some nice clothes, Shirley. 716 00:44:11,453 --> 00:44:13,455 You've got good taste. 717 00:44:23,849 --> 00:44:26,851 Hello, Karen. I've got to go and lay those floorboards. 718 00:44:26,852 --> 00:44:30,722 Make the most of it, mate. That's all you'll ever lay. 719 00:44:32,608 --> 00:44:33,609 Oh... 720 00:44:39,982 --> 00:44:41,483 You still here? 721 00:44:41,484 --> 00:44:44,486 I'd have escaped after dinner. I don't want to. 722 00:44:44,487 --> 00:44:46,989 You're barmy. You're still here. 723 00:44:47,490 --> 00:44:50,326 I wouldn't have gone to dinner after what she did to you and Terry. 724 00:44:50,626 --> 00:44:53,578 You're not used to her little ways. 725 00:44:53,913 --> 00:44:55,831 Is she always like this? 726 00:44:56,132 --> 00:45:01,721 Tom says that, when she's got her sons to herself, she's almost human, 727 00:45:01,722 --> 00:45:04,508 but at the first whiff of perfume, she takes to her broomstick. 728 00:45:04,725 --> 00:45:06,760 I've been let off rather lightly, haven't I? 729 00:45:07,177 --> 00:45:11,764 What? She hasn't even started on you yet. 730 00:45:11,765 --> 00:45:13,266 She will. 731 00:45:13,267 --> 00:45:14,601 She'll find your weakness, 732 00:45:14,852 --> 00:45:17,938 and she'll drag it round the room in triumph. 733 00:45:19,940 --> 00:45:23,910 Two can play at that game. I can be pretty nasty if I put my mind to it. 734 00:45:23,911 --> 00:45:29,416 Really? Well, it'll be a change for me to have a ringside seat. 735 00:45:29,417 --> 00:45:31,251 I'm usually inside the ring on the ropes. 736 00:45:31,252 --> 00:45:35,622 She's got to be shown that, as far as Tom is concerned, 737 00:45:35,623 --> 00:45:37,624 I'm the boss now. 738 00:45:37,625 --> 00:45:38,625 The boss? 739 00:45:38,626 --> 00:45:40,961 Well, I mean, if we're going to be married. 740 00:45:40,962 --> 00:45:44,181 Oh. Does Tom know this? 741 00:45:44,182 --> 00:45:45,599 What? 742 00:45:45,600 --> 00:45:48,102 That you're gonna be the boss? 743 00:45:48,603 --> 00:45:49,971 We're getting married, aren't we? 744 00:45:51,891 --> 00:45:54,225 Into the frying pan. Into the frying pan. 745 00:45:54,226 --> 00:45:56,611 I don't know what you mean. 746 00:45:57,980 --> 00:46:00,782 No. I don't suppose you do. 747 00:46:00,783 --> 00:46:03,068 Poor old Tom. 748 00:46:05,988 --> 00:46:09,073 One thing's for sure. You won't be going to Canada. 749 00:46:09,074 --> 00:46:10,074 I will. You won't! 750 00:46:10,075 --> 00:46:12,076 I will! You won't! 751 00:46:12,077 --> 00:46:13,578 Two can play this prediction game. 752 00:46:13,579 --> 00:46:15,080 You've had your turn, I'll have mine. 753 00:46:15,581 --> 00:46:18,584 You won't be marrying Shirley. Yeah? Who will stop me? 754 00:46:18,585 --> 00:46:21,087 She will, if she's got any sense, which I doubt, 755 00:46:21,588 --> 00:46:26,592 and she's like all the rest the birds you've... 756 00:46:26,593 --> 00:46:28,594 Well, I know what's wrong with this house. 757 00:46:28,595 --> 00:46:32,097 It needs some love pumping into it. 758 00:46:32,098 --> 00:46:33,098 What this house needs 759 00:46:33,099 --> 00:46:36,602 is a heavy lead ball crashing against the walls. 760 00:46:36,603 --> 00:46:39,104 Yeah, and where's mum, Tom? Where's mum? 761 00:46:39,105 --> 00:46:41,106 She's standing up there. Yeah. 762 00:46:41,107 --> 00:46:44,110 She sees the ball. "Stop!" She says. "Stop! This is my house!" 763 00:46:44,111 --> 00:46:46,112 Yes, but the ball doesn't stop. No! 764 00:46:46,113 --> 00:46:47,614 Biff! Right on her head! 765 00:46:47,615 --> 00:46:49,616 Her head goes dancing down the stairs. 766 00:46:49,617 --> 00:46:53,120 And she's left without a head, standing up there. Yeah! 767 00:46:55,122 --> 00:46:56,623 Hello, my dears. 768 00:46:58,125 --> 00:47:02,095 Well, 40 years ago, 769 00:47:02,096 --> 00:47:05,131 the beginning of a wonderful marriage. 770 00:47:05,132 --> 00:47:09,135 This is the day we think only of kindness and love, 771 00:47:09,136 --> 00:47:12,140 and we can best do that by thinking of your father. 772 00:47:19,648 --> 00:47:22,567 His last words to me were... 773 00:47:22,784 --> 00:47:26,287 And there were tears in his eyes when he said them... 774 00:47:26,288 --> 00:47:28,823 "I did try, mum. 775 00:47:28,824 --> 00:47:29,874 I did try." 776 00:47:29,875 --> 00:47:32,877 And then he looked up at the ceiling, 777 00:47:32,878 --> 00:47:35,046 sighed, and said hoarsely but clearly, 778 00:47:35,047 --> 00:47:37,382 "now, I can get a bit of bloody peace." 779 00:47:37,383 --> 00:47:39,968 Don't talk like that in front of your father. 780 00:47:39,969 --> 00:47:42,804 If you two are starting, I'm going. 781 00:47:42,805 --> 00:47:44,256 Sit down. 782 00:47:45,808 --> 00:47:48,260 This is my day, isn't it, love? 783 00:47:48,261 --> 00:47:50,729 I'm not your love. 784 00:47:50,730 --> 00:47:52,230 Yes, you are. 785 00:47:52,231 --> 00:47:53,682 You belong to me. 786 00:47:53,683 --> 00:47:57,152 If I could stuff you, 787 00:47:57,153 --> 00:47:59,104 I'd put you in that cabinet there, 788 00:47:59,105 --> 00:48:02,108 along with my other beautiful possessions. 789 00:48:02,109 --> 00:48:04,945 And that's love. Is it? 790 00:48:06,246 --> 00:48:10,249 None of us can wait to get clear of you. 791 00:48:10,250 --> 00:48:13,169 Henry's already gone. He went the quick way: 'Round the bend. 792 00:48:13,170 --> 00:48:15,038 Terry there, he's off to Canada. 793 00:48:15,039 --> 00:48:17,840 He's not going. He is. 794 00:48:17,841 --> 00:48:21,844 He promised faithfully he wouldn't. 795 00:48:21,845 --> 00:48:24,347 When did I do that, mum? You didn't, Terry. 796 00:48:24,348 --> 00:48:25,682 Take no notice of her. 797 00:48:25,683 --> 00:48:28,886 But you're going to take notice, aren't you, dear? 798 00:48:28,887 --> 00:48:31,271 No. I don't think so, mum. 799 00:48:31,272 --> 00:48:33,724 I think so... 800 00:48:33,725 --> 00:48:36,860 'Cause we have a little secret, haven't we? 801 00:48:36,861 --> 00:48:39,229 And we wouldn't want it to come out, would we? 802 00:48:39,230 --> 00:48:41,231 Not in front of Karen. 803 00:48:41,232 --> 00:48:44,118 She'd never trust you again. Leave it alone, mum. 804 00:48:44,119 --> 00:48:46,870 Only if you say you're not going to Canada. 805 00:48:46,871 --> 00:48:51,408 Stop it, mum. What about the money, then? 806 00:48:51,409 --> 00:48:55,630 The 5,000 quid? £1,000 in fivers, 807 00:48:55,631 --> 00:48:58,500 every time you tell me Karen is pregnant. 808 00:49:01,253 --> 00:49:03,672 You swore you'd never let on about it. 809 00:49:04,056 --> 00:49:07,642 She gives you 1,000 quid every time Karen's got a bun in the oven? 810 00:49:07,643 --> 00:49:11,813 I make only one condition... Terry is the father. 811 00:49:12,231 --> 00:49:15,767 Well, you kept quiet about this one, then, didn't you? 812 00:49:17,103 --> 00:49:18,103 Yeah, but why? 813 00:49:18,187 --> 00:49:20,271 To save the marriage. 814 00:49:20,272 --> 00:49:22,191 A house full of children, a pregnant wife, 815 00:49:22,526 --> 00:49:23,944 he needs an outlet. 816 00:49:24,194 --> 00:49:27,196 Cards, roulette, dogs, horses... 817 00:49:27,197 --> 00:49:29,165 That takes money. Codswallop! 818 00:49:29,583 --> 00:49:34,170 You're right, Tom. It is codswallop. 819 00:49:34,371 --> 00:49:36,956 When my mother heard 820 00:49:36,957 --> 00:49:38,925 that my second baby was on the way, 821 00:49:39,292 --> 00:49:40,793 she started on at me 822 00:49:41,128 --> 00:49:44,514 about not allowing a decent interval in-between. 823 00:49:44,714 --> 00:49:47,100 She started going on about my heart. 824 00:49:47,301 --> 00:49:49,770 You've got a dickey heart? No. 825 00:49:49,771 --> 00:49:52,272 Besides, kids come out of me like bullets, 826 00:49:52,273 --> 00:49:55,476 but you know mothers. I was supposed to have had pleurisy when I was a kid. 827 00:49:55,893 --> 00:49:58,478 Ever since then, she's maintained I'm delicate. 828 00:49:58,896 --> 00:50:00,447 Me, delicate. 829 00:50:01,949 --> 00:50:04,034 Well, my mother 830 00:50:04,035 --> 00:50:07,320 had a quiet word with Terry's mum 831 00:50:07,321 --> 00:50:09,156 about my poor old heart, 832 00:50:09,457 --> 00:50:11,959 and what did Terry's mum do about it? 833 00:50:12,293 --> 00:50:16,380 She gave Terry 1,000 quid and said, 834 00:50:16,381 --> 00:50:21,135 "how quickly can you get the next one on the way?" 835 00:50:21,336 --> 00:50:24,722 For years, she's been waiting for me to drop down dead. 836 00:50:24,973 --> 00:50:27,842 She thought she was gonna commit the perfect murder, 837 00:50:28,060 --> 00:50:31,145 but all she's been doing 838 00:50:31,146 --> 00:50:35,817 is paying us to have kids that we wanted anyway! 839 00:50:37,486 --> 00:50:38,526 But where's the money now? 840 00:50:38,937 --> 00:50:41,523 I've got it stowed away. 841 00:50:41,524 --> 00:50:43,943 Canada, here we come! 842 00:50:45,829 --> 00:50:49,364 You try hiding a wad of fivers away from your wife, mum. 843 00:50:49,365 --> 00:50:52,201 It can't be done. But you haven't heard the last of it, Tommy. 844 00:50:52,202 --> 00:50:56,955 She gave Terry 1,000 quid because of the latest one that's on the way, 845 00:50:56,956 --> 00:50:59,625 only there isn't one! 846 00:51:03,930 --> 00:51:05,766 There isn't one? No. I'm not pregnant, love. 847 00:51:09,436 --> 00:51:13,022 I thought she was, mum. It's what she told me. 848 00:51:13,023 --> 00:51:15,475 Well, we needed that extra 1,000. 849 00:51:15,860 --> 00:51:19,730 Well, you boobed bringing this one out in the open, didn't you, darling? 850 00:51:31,041 --> 00:51:33,544 Clobbered into silence, at last. 851 00:51:33,545 --> 00:51:36,548 No. She's up to something. 852 00:51:42,003 --> 00:51:43,504 Close the door. 853 00:51:43,505 --> 00:51:46,007 I don't want to lose the heat. 854 00:51:50,729 --> 00:51:53,598 I dislike doing it, children, 855 00:51:53,848 --> 00:51:56,433 but I don't see any way out. 856 00:51:56,434 --> 00:51:57,935 Doing what? 857 00:51:57,936 --> 00:52:00,940 Hand Henry over to the police. 858 00:52:02,441 --> 00:52:04,910 Hand Henry over to the police? 859 00:52:05,328 --> 00:52:07,913 I can't possibly 860 00:52:07,914 --> 00:52:10,366 cope with him on my own. 861 00:52:10,750 --> 00:52:15,337 Yeah, but... but you can't do that to him, mum. 862 00:52:15,338 --> 00:52:17,339 He's getting worse. 863 00:52:17,340 --> 00:52:19,841 I can't get inside his room for undies. 864 00:52:19,842 --> 00:52:23,845 He has to be watched morning, noon, and night. 865 00:52:23,846 --> 00:52:27,300 Without you, I just haven't got the time. 866 00:52:27,301 --> 00:52:31,854 So let him go for treatment or something. He'll get treatment in prison. 867 00:52:31,855 --> 00:52:34,357 I'm sorry... 868 00:52:34,358 --> 00:52:37,861 But I can't think of any alternative. 869 00:52:38,362 --> 00:52:40,863 Unless Terry stays. 870 00:52:40,864 --> 00:52:42,866 Unless, as you said, 871 00:52:43,367 --> 00:52:45,369 Terry stays. 872 00:52:48,372 --> 00:52:50,874 Yeah, but-but that's blackmail. 873 00:52:50,875 --> 00:52:53,377 She'd never do it, not to Henry. 874 00:52:53,378 --> 00:52:54,879 You wanna bet? 875 00:53:01,636 --> 00:53:03,471 Mum, you wouldn't send Henry to prison. 876 00:53:03,721 --> 00:53:06,807 Only on humanitarian grounds, dear. 877 00:53:06,808 --> 00:53:08,809 My eldest needs help. 878 00:53:08,810 --> 00:53:12,597 What kind of a mother would I be if I didn't give it to him? 879 00:53:12,814 --> 00:53:16,851 That's just the kind of help you would give. Sling someone in the Nick for six months. 880 00:53:17,186 --> 00:53:20,272 I'm not "slinging him in the Nick," 881 00:53:20,773 --> 00:53:22,241 as you put it, Terry is. 882 00:53:24,159 --> 00:53:29,614 Darling, could you turn your back on your big brother? 883 00:53:30,115 --> 00:53:34,619 He was the one who grabbed you out of the pond when you were four years old. 884 00:53:34,620 --> 00:53:37,623 He was the one who let you play with his clockwork train. 885 00:53:38,123 --> 00:53:40,125 He was the one who went out one morning 886 00:53:40,626 --> 00:53:44,046 and bought 72 marbles and gave them all to you. 887 00:53:44,047 --> 00:53:48,717 He was the one who took your chair away that time and nearly broke your back. 888 00:53:48,718 --> 00:53:53,472 He never did. Henry's never done anything rotten to me in his life. 889 00:53:53,473 --> 00:53:55,441 I know he hasn't, idiot. 890 00:53:55,892 --> 00:53:57,943 It's just that I find mum's sentimental rubbish nauseating. 891 00:53:57,944 --> 00:54:01,864 I know all that, but I still don't want Henry to land up in the Nick! 892 00:54:01,865 --> 00:54:04,651 I think mum's right. 893 00:54:04,901 --> 00:54:06,485 Henry should be locked up. 894 00:54:06,486 --> 00:54:07,986 It's for his own good. 895 00:54:07,987 --> 00:54:09,288 It's humanitarian. 896 00:54:09,540 --> 00:54:12,125 My god, she's quick! 897 00:54:12,126 --> 00:54:14,628 Notice how she's pinched my argument. 898 00:54:16,580 --> 00:54:19,132 Well, it won't wash, dear. 899 00:54:19,133 --> 00:54:21,634 If you're really a humanitarian, 900 00:54:21,635 --> 00:54:24,971 you'll see to it that Henry does not go to jail. 901 00:54:24,972 --> 00:54:28,975 I don't think he ought to go to jail, either. You don't? 902 00:54:28,976 --> 00:54:30,977 No, I don't. 903 00:54:30,978 --> 00:54:33,480 Education is a wonderful thing, Karen. 904 00:54:33,481 --> 00:54:35,348 We have an educated woman here. 905 00:54:35,349 --> 00:54:37,685 She says Henry should not go to jail. 906 00:54:37,686 --> 00:54:41,155 We can't argue with an educated woman, can we? 907 00:54:41,156 --> 00:54:44,158 He'd only be ridiculed in prison, wouldn't he? 908 00:54:44,159 --> 00:54:47,161 No one wants him ridiculed, surely. 909 00:54:47,162 --> 00:54:49,613 Well, let's ask them, my dear. Terry? 910 00:54:49,614 --> 00:54:53,417 - Do you want Henry ridiculed? - It wouldn't help his illness. 911 00:54:53,418 --> 00:54:56,787 He'd only come out, do it again, and be given a longer sentence. 912 00:54:56,788 --> 00:55:00,291 Then one day he'd go in and never come out at all, 913 00:55:00,292 --> 00:55:03,546 just because of Terry's selfishness. 914 00:55:03,880 --> 00:55:07,266 Oh, I think Terry should go to Canada. 915 00:55:09,018 --> 00:55:11,687 You do? Yes. Definitely. 916 00:55:11,888 --> 00:55:15,808 You're a bit of a cretin on the quiet, aren't you? 917 00:55:17,393 --> 00:55:18,977 I thought she was an educated woman! 918 00:55:19,362 --> 00:55:22,948 Only a facade, obviously. 919 00:55:22,949 --> 00:55:24,951 Let's take a closer look. 920 00:55:25,952 --> 00:55:29,323 What else is false about you, my dear? 921 00:55:30,541 --> 00:55:32,459 Not your lashes... 922 00:55:34,461 --> 00:55:36,796 Not your nails... 923 00:55:38,298 --> 00:55:41,050 You're not wearing a wig, are you? 924 00:55:43,554 --> 00:55:48,057 Why are you hiding your ears? Let me see your ears. No. 925 00:55:48,058 --> 00:55:49,893 Let me see them. 926 00:55:54,599 --> 00:55:57,818 Ha! Have you ever seen ears like that, Karen? 927 00:55:59,687 --> 00:56:02,523 Come and look. They're boxer's ears, all mottled. 928 00:56:02,524 --> 00:56:05,360 Shut her up, Tom... please? 929 00:56:05,660 --> 00:56:09,580 Wave goodbye, Tom. She's found her weak spot. 930 00:56:09,781 --> 00:56:12,366 I'm marrying her, mum. 931 00:56:12,367 --> 00:56:14,368 Have you seen her ears? 932 00:56:14,369 --> 00:56:16,371 They're repulsive. 933 00:56:16,871 --> 00:56:19,873 Aren't they repulsive, my dear? 934 00:56:19,874 --> 00:56:21,710 Yes. You see? She agrees with me. 935 00:56:21,961 --> 00:56:24,121 Because she's got a thing about them, that's all. 936 00:56:24,346 --> 00:56:26,931 I have an aversion to anything that's repulsive. 937 00:56:26,932 --> 00:56:28,883 Could you live with those ears? 938 00:56:28,884 --> 00:56:31,886 Oh, come on. Leave her alone. 939 00:56:31,887 --> 00:56:33,388 She can't help her ears. 940 00:56:33,389 --> 00:56:34,890 There's nothing wrong with her ears! 941 00:56:38,394 --> 00:56:41,397 Do they let in much of a draft, my dear? 942 00:56:42,398 --> 00:56:43,781 Come, children. 943 00:56:43,782 --> 00:56:46,151 The toast. 944 00:56:47,654 --> 00:56:50,156 Let us not forget your father. 945 00:56:53,159 --> 00:56:55,161 I expect he's listening in. 946 00:56:56,162 --> 00:56:57,162 Oh, dad... 947 00:56:57,163 --> 00:57:01,133 Why'd you leave me with all this responsibility? 948 00:57:01,134 --> 00:57:06,171 Would you forgive me if I gave it all up and retired... 949 00:57:06,172 --> 00:57:08,891 Maybe to Canada? 950 00:57:10,844 --> 00:57:12,762 If you're here, dad, give us a sign. 951 00:57:13,147 --> 00:57:15,732 Careful. He might have the house down on top of us. 952 00:57:15,733 --> 00:57:19,236 Do something useful, dad. Get the governor to turn her into a pillar of salt. 953 00:57:21,239 --> 00:57:24,241 I'm sure your father is thinking, 954 00:57:24,242 --> 00:57:25,660 "they haven't changed, have they?" 955 00:57:26,027 --> 00:57:30,448 There's mum, in the midst of all this treachery... 956 00:57:30,698 --> 00:57:32,782 Still loving. 957 00:57:32,783 --> 00:57:34,785 Always loving. 958 00:57:36,787 --> 00:57:39,790 Ah, whose is that new face I see? 959 00:57:39,791 --> 00:57:41,208 Must be a girlfriend of Tommy's. 960 00:57:41,209 --> 00:57:44,462 "Strange what men find attractive." Mum... 961 00:57:44,463 --> 00:57:48,683 I was just telling you what your father was saying. He's dead. 962 00:57:48,684 --> 00:57:51,769 He still has a right to be heard. 963 00:57:51,770 --> 00:57:53,271 Well... 964 00:57:54,273 --> 00:57:57,776 Here we are, dad, paying our respects to you, 965 00:57:58,277 --> 00:58:01,613 the same as last year, the same as it will be next year. 966 00:58:02,481 --> 00:58:04,448 You are our father, 967 00:58:04,449 --> 00:58:06,285 the rock upon which we stand. 968 00:58:06,486 --> 00:58:09,071 No one will ever leave. 969 00:58:09,072 --> 00:58:11,073 They are our children 970 00:58:11,074 --> 00:58:15,577 and have it not in their hearts to destroy us, 971 00:58:15,578 --> 00:58:19,081 because it is us who will be mortally wounded 972 00:58:19,082 --> 00:58:22,584 and the pain, the awful pain, 973 00:58:22,585 --> 00:58:26,088 will be such as no person has ever borne before. 974 00:58:26,589 --> 00:58:27,590 That's it. I've had it. 975 00:58:28,091 --> 00:58:29,092 To dad. 976 00:58:30,593 --> 00:58:32,595 To dad. 977 00:58:32,596 --> 00:58:33,597 Dad. 978 00:58:38,068 --> 00:58:40,570 ♪ Rock of ages ♪ 979 00:58:40,571 --> 00:58:43,072 ♪ Cleft for me ♪ 980 00:58:43,073 --> 00:58:46,109 ♪ Let me hide myself in thee ♪ 981 00:58:46,110 --> 00:58:50,747 ♪ Let the la Dee and the blood ♪ 982 00:58:50,748 --> 00:58:54,867 ♪ From the Dee dah and, uh, flowed ♪ 983 00:58:54,868 --> 00:58:57,170 ♪ Rock of ages ♪ 984 00:58:57,171 --> 00:58:58,622 ♪ Cleft for me ♪ 985 00:58:58,623 --> 00:59:01,008 ♪ Let me hide 986 00:59:01,009 --> 00:59:03,928 ♪ myself in thee ♪ 987 00:59:05,964 --> 00:59:09,550 That was my husband's favorite hymn, Shirley. 988 00:59:09,551 --> 00:59:12,553 He knew all the words, too. 989 00:59:12,554 --> 00:59:16,056 Well, I've done my solo bit. 990 00:59:16,057 --> 00:59:18,058 It's your turn, Terry. 991 00:59:18,059 --> 00:59:20,060 Hey, hey. Come on, maestro. 992 00:59:20,061 --> 00:59:22,563 Come on, love. Get it over with. 993 00:59:43,085 --> 00:59:44,586 ♪ 994 01:00:31,219 --> 01:00:34,271 You weren't expecting that, were you, Shirley? 995 01:00:34,272 --> 01:00:37,892 That's why I keep the piano, in the hopes that Terry will take it up again. 996 01:00:38,226 --> 01:00:40,310 Take it up again, Terry. 997 01:00:40,311 --> 01:00:42,196 You owe it to culture. 998 01:00:47,569 --> 01:00:51,572 Now, what you going to do for us, little Tommy Tucker? 999 01:00:51,573 --> 01:00:54,408 I'm going to recite a poem. 1000 01:00:54,409 --> 01:00:57,211 We won't find it in the golden treasury, will we? 1001 01:01:01,216 --> 01:01:04,669 "There was a young lady of bow who slept with 10 men in a row," 1002 01:01:05,003 --> 01:01:07,088 'because, ' as she said, 'when I get into bed, 1003 01:01:07,089 --> 01:01:09,559 "I forget what the word is for no.'" 1004 01:01:09,926 --> 01:01:13,428 very good, very ribald. 1005 01:01:13,429 --> 01:01:15,431 Fetch me some champagne. 1006 01:01:16,900 --> 01:01:19,269 Now, it's your turn, Shirley. 1007 01:01:19,569 --> 01:01:21,437 Me? Yes. 1008 01:01:21,771 --> 01:01:24,190 No. I'd be too embarrassed. 1009 01:01:24,440 --> 01:01:26,325 I want you to entertain me. 1010 01:01:26,526 --> 01:01:29,111 Get up and do something. 1011 01:01:29,112 --> 01:01:31,113 You can't make me do a thing. 1012 01:01:31,114 --> 01:01:33,616 I can stop you from marrying him. 1013 01:01:34,033 --> 01:01:38,121 No, you can't, because I shan't be like Karen. 1014 01:01:38,122 --> 01:01:40,007 I don't need anything from you. 1015 01:01:40,257 --> 01:01:44,127 You'll need a sedative when I tell you Tommy's already married. 1016 01:01:44,512 --> 01:01:48,097 That's not true, Shirley. 1017 01:01:48,098 --> 01:01:52,051 Well, at least it shut her up. Gave us a bit of respite. 1018 01:01:52,052 --> 01:01:56,105 Personally, I preferred last year's exhibit. 1019 01:01:56,106 --> 01:01:58,057 What was her name? Heather. 1020 01:01:58,058 --> 01:02:02,530 So there was a girl here last year. 1021 01:02:02,531 --> 01:02:03,949 Yes, there was, Shirley. 1022 01:02:04,316 --> 01:02:06,901 You didn't think you were the first, did you? 1023 01:02:06,902 --> 01:02:09,154 You're the third... And always on this day. 1024 01:02:09,371 --> 01:02:11,956 I wonder who it will be next year. 1025 01:02:11,957 --> 01:02:14,960 You've been engaged twice before? 1026 01:02:15,460 --> 01:02:18,963 She was always able to break them into little pieces. 1027 01:02:18,964 --> 01:02:23,467 She thinks she can do the same with anyone I bring here. Why didn't you tell me? 1028 01:02:23,468 --> 01:02:27,722 I had to see if she could break you, too. As I said, you're not the first. 1029 01:02:27,973 --> 01:02:30,926 But I'm going to be the last. 1030 01:02:31,227 --> 01:02:34,262 Even if I tell you Tommy gets engaged each year 1031 01:02:34,263 --> 01:02:36,765 to spit in my eye? 1032 01:02:37,099 --> 01:02:39,184 I'd spit in the other one if you had it. 1033 01:02:39,185 --> 01:02:43,355 I don't know why they don't call you old one-eye! Shut her up, Tom! 1034 01:02:45,908 --> 01:02:50,329 I'm only giving her what she gave me! Stupid little bitch. 1035 01:02:50,580 --> 01:02:54,751 Shh. Yes. You shouldn't have brought that up, my dear. 1036 01:02:58,205 --> 01:02:59,205 Why? 1037 01:03:02,876 --> 01:03:05,378 You're right, of course. I have only one eye. 1038 01:03:05,796 --> 01:03:08,181 Mum, please. 1039 01:03:08,382 --> 01:03:10,851 One, hot day in August when Terry was a little boy, 1040 01:03:11,101 --> 01:03:14,771 he crept into Henry's bedroom and took Henry's air pistol. 1041 01:03:15,022 --> 01:03:19,142 He ran up to me in the garden. He was so excited. 1042 01:03:19,309 --> 01:03:21,395 And as he pressed the trigger 1043 01:03:21,396 --> 01:03:24,198 with both of his little hands, he shouted, 1044 01:03:24,399 --> 01:03:26,367 "bang! You're dead, mummy." 1045 01:03:28,620 --> 01:03:30,705 And he laughed and laughed, 1046 01:03:31,205 --> 01:03:33,073 until he saw the blood spurting out. 1047 01:03:35,159 --> 01:03:37,244 He had nightmares for two years. 1048 01:03:37,745 --> 01:03:41,048 He's never looked me in the face since. 1049 01:03:42,383 --> 01:03:43,167 So... 1050 01:03:43,334 --> 01:03:46,420 Instead of being cruel to me, my dear, 1051 01:03:46,421 --> 01:03:48,423 you're being cruel to Terry, 1052 01:03:48,424 --> 01:03:51,426 by reminding him of that hot day in August 1053 01:03:51,427 --> 01:03:53,896 when he stung the life out of his mummy's eye. 1054 01:03:56,098 --> 01:03:58,182 But mummy forgave, didn't she, darling? 1055 01:03:58,183 --> 01:04:00,268 You've never forgiven. 1056 01:04:00,269 --> 01:04:02,937 Well, I can't exactly stop looking at him. 1057 01:04:02,938 --> 01:04:06,191 It was nobody's fault. It was an accident. 1058 01:04:06,525 --> 01:04:10,695 Terry doesn't think so. As far as he knows, he blinded his mother in one eye. 1059 01:04:10,996 --> 01:04:12,580 And how is he repaying her? 1060 01:04:12,581 --> 01:04:15,918 By going off to Canada and shooting out the other. 1061 01:04:16,169 --> 01:04:19,338 Why didn't you warn the little fool about it? It... 1062 01:04:19,539 --> 01:04:22,124 I've done nothing I'm ashamed of. 1063 01:04:22,125 --> 01:04:24,460 I'm not having her dictate to me! 1064 01:04:24,711 --> 01:04:27,547 Why? What's so special about you? 1065 01:04:27,764 --> 01:04:31,350 I wanted to ram it home to her that I'm no Clay pigeon for a shootout 1066 01:04:31,851 --> 01:04:33,219 whenever it takes her fancy! 1067 01:04:33,636 --> 01:04:37,690 And while we're about it, we might as well get more facts sorted out. 1068 01:04:38,024 --> 01:04:39,443 From now on, 1069 01:04:39,694 --> 01:04:41,278 I come first where Tom's concerned. 1070 01:04:41,779 --> 01:04:43,781 He answers to me! 1071 01:04:44,115 --> 01:04:47,067 I've made up my mind where we're going to live and it's not near here! 1072 01:04:47,318 --> 01:04:51,705 And I know the sort of job he'll be doing. It won't be working for you. 1073 01:04:51,872 --> 01:04:56,076 And I know how many kids I'm gonna have, and I'll tell you this. 1074 01:04:56,077 --> 01:04:59,579 Not one of those kids will be seeing anything of old one-eye! 1075 01:04:59,580 --> 01:05:04,334 And I'm staying the weekend, because I'm not to be got rid of! 1076 01:05:04,335 --> 01:05:05,837 What do you say to that? 1077 01:05:06,254 --> 01:05:09,757 Nothing, my dear. 1078 01:05:09,758 --> 01:05:13,978 You've found someone who can stand up to you, and you don't like it, do you? 1079 01:05:13,979 --> 01:05:17,015 Tom and I are going for a walk and when we come back 1080 01:05:17,399 --> 01:05:19,984 I don't want to hear any more talk about the wedding. 1081 01:05:19,985 --> 01:05:22,354 It's been settled. I've settled it. 1082 01:05:22,654 --> 01:05:24,689 Tom and I are getting married. 1083 01:05:25,107 --> 01:05:27,109 And if you start up again, 1084 01:05:27,492 --> 01:05:28,576 I'll... 1085 01:05:29,578 --> 01:05:32,949 I'll poke out your other eye! Now, come on, Tom! 1086 01:05:37,003 --> 01:05:38,037 Go on, Tom. 1087 01:05:40,039 --> 01:05:41,590 Yes. 1088 01:05:41,591 --> 01:05:43,509 Well... Tom? 1089 01:05:49,766 --> 01:05:50,767 Tom! 1090 01:05:53,269 --> 01:05:55,771 And just you remember what she said. 1091 01:06:13,207 --> 01:06:14,208 Well... 1092 01:06:14,708 --> 01:06:17,627 Now let's light the bonfire. 1093 01:06:19,913 --> 01:06:22,248 Come, children. 1094 01:06:22,749 --> 01:06:24,752 Fireworks time. 1095 01:07:35,825 --> 01:07:37,826 Here! There's somebody at your washing. 1096 01:07:37,827 --> 01:07:39,828 Somebody has stole some things. 1097 01:07:39,829 --> 01:07:42,831 Go on, after him. 1098 01:07:42,832 --> 01:07:47,337 After him? In my pajamas? 1099 01:07:47,338 --> 01:07:49,339 Here, come back, you thieving perisher! 1100 01:07:49,340 --> 01:07:51,341 Fetch those things back! 1101 01:07:51,342 --> 01:07:53,343 I'll call the police! 1102 01:08:36,556 --> 01:08:38,858 Oh! 1103 01:10:15,491 --> 01:10:17,042 What's the matter? 1104 01:10:17,043 --> 01:10:19,829 Nothing. Yes, there is. What is it? 1105 01:10:20,046 --> 01:10:22,883 You're even beginning to look like mum. 1106 01:10:24,251 --> 01:10:26,052 What a terrible thing to say. 1107 01:10:26,303 --> 01:10:29,889 It's been worrying me ever since you went for her back there. 1108 01:10:30,390 --> 01:10:33,810 You took over, didn't let me get a look in, you kept me out. 1109 01:10:34,144 --> 01:10:36,229 I wanted to prove that I love you. 1110 01:10:36,596 --> 01:10:39,432 That's the sort of reply I'd of got from mum. 1111 01:10:39,649 --> 01:10:42,234 Will you stop comparing me with your mum? 1112 01:10:49,160 --> 01:10:51,162 I love you. 1113 01:11:00,671 --> 01:11:03,623 Whatever you want to do, 1114 01:11:03,624 --> 01:11:05,676 it's all right with me. 1115 01:11:07,178 --> 01:11:08,679 Such as? 1116 01:11:14,686 --> 01:11:16,137 You'll think of something. 1117 01:11:30,819 --> 01:11:32,320 We could... 1118 01:11:34,289 --> 01:11:37,292 Yes, that's it. The two of us 1119 01:11:37,659 --> 01:11:39,578 will spend the night in mum's bed. 1120 01:11:45,001 --> 01:11:46,919 I-I don't think I'd enjoy that, Tom. 1121 01:11:47,170 --> 01:11:50,056 You're thinking of yourself again. No. It's not that. 1122 01:11:52,308 --> 01:11:53,342 Well, I... 1123 01:11:53,343 --> 01:11:55,645 It just wouldn't be any good. 1124 01:11:55,845 --> 01:11:58,897 It doesn't matter. It's enough to be just lying there, 1125 01:11:58,898 --> 01:12:01,150 hearing her thumping away on the locked door, 1126 01:12:01,401 --> 01:12:03,436 and screaming through the keyhole. 1127 01:12:05,489 --> 01:12:07,073 Let's go back to my place. 1128 01:12:09,160 --> 01:12:12,863 And what would the others think if I left now? I'd be finished in their eyes. 1129 01:12:13,197 --> 01:12:15,199 A hen-pecked write-off. 1130 01:12:15,699 --> 01:12:18,785 No. I can't leave until mum's beaten and I'm back on top again. 1131 01:12:19,203 --> 01:12:22,121 Listen, you don't know what you're asking, Tom. 1132 01:12:22,122 --> 01:12:23,456 I feel unclean. 1133 01:12:23,757 --> 01:12:25,792 You needn't. The sheets are changed once a week. 1134 01:12:26,210 --> 01:12:28,045 That wasn't what I meant. 1135 01:12:28,262 --> 01:12:29,846 There you go again. 1136 01:12:31,348 --> 01:12:33,351 I'm not interested in what you mean. 1137 01:12:33,802 --> 01:12:36,854 It's what I mean, I feel, I want! 1138 01:12:36,855 --> 01:12:39,274 So make up your mind, love. What's it to be? 1139 01:13:19,599 --> 01:13:23,101 Sorry you missed the fireworks, dear. 1140 01:13:23,102 --> 01:13:25,155 What's the matter? 1141 01:13:25,405 --> 01:13:27,273 You get lost in an undie factory? 1142 01:13:28,609 --> 01:13:31,612 Oh, no. It was the police. 1143 01:13:32,029 --> 01:13:35,114 They nearly caught me. 1144 01:13:35,115 --> 01:13:37,116 I'd got hold of a garment 1145 01:13:37,117 --> 01:13:39,317 and was just pinning the 10-Bob note to the clothesline. 1146 01:13:39,703 --> 01:13:42,955 Somebody started shouting, I've been running ever since. 1147 01:13:42,956 --> 01:13:44,457 It's a great pity you weren't caught. 1148 01:13:44,958 --> 01:13:47,260 A scandal like that might bring you to your senses. 1149 01:13:47,511 --> 01:13:49,212 What about the car? 1150 01:13:51,215 --> 01:13:54,134 Oh, my god. Forgot about the car. 1151 01:13:54,519 --> 01:13:57,104 The police are sure to find it. 1152 01:13:57,105 --> 01:14:01,608 And it's got a sari, suspender belt and a couple of pairs of panties on the front seat! 1153 01:14:01,609 --> 01:14:05,112 Good. Headlines across the front page will serve you right. 1154 01:14:05,113 --> 01:14:07,064 I'm sorry but I've got no sympathy with you. 1155 01:14:07,532 --> 01:14:12,069 But it's not my car, Karen. I was still using yours. 1156 01:14:12,453 --> 01:14:14,037 Terry's car? 1157 01:14:14,038 --> 01:14:16,991 The... the police will think it's me! 1158 01:14:17,409 --> 01:14:20,995 Talk your way out of that one, Terry! But... mum? 1159 01:14:25,250 --> 01:14:28,803 Henry's room needs a spring cleaning. 1160 01:14:28,804 --> 01:14:31,840 Make sure the bonfire's still burning, Tommy. 1161 01:14:34,343 --> 01:14:35,843 Mum. 1162 01:14:35,844 --> 01:14:39,681 If the police come, you'll tell them, won't you? What, dear? 1163 01:14:39,682 --> 01:14:43,236 That it wasn't me. It's your car. 1164 01:14:47,741 --> 01:14:49,242 Mum, look. I mean... 1165 01:14:51,244 --> 01:14:54,246 Surely your mum won't let Terry take the blame. 1166 01:14:54,247 --> 01:14:58,667 Give her half a chance, she'll drive the wagon herself. 1167 01:14:58,668 --> 01:15:02,087 You see it from your point of view, Terry. 1168 01:15:02,088 --> 01:15:04,089 That's understandable. 1169 01:15:04,090 --> 01:15:07,093 I see it from the police's point of view, 1170 01:15:07,594 --> 01:15:09,596 simply as a good citizen. 1171 01:15:09,597 --> 01:15:12,099 Look, mum. You might be sending me to prison. 1172 01:15:12,600 --> 01:15:16,102 Dishonesty should not go unpunished, son. 1173 01:15:16,103 --> 01:15:18,104 But I haven't done anything! 1174 01:15:18,105 --> 01:15:20,607 But the car gives you away. 1175 01:15:20,608 --> 01:15:24,611 Even a mother can't be blind to that evidence. Look, mum. 1176 01:15:24,612 --> 01:15:28,114 Look, Henry, you can't let your brother take the blame for what you did. 1177 01:15:28,115 --> 01:15:30,901 It's not as simple as that, Karen. 1178 01:15:31,152 --> 01:15:34,237 It couldn't be more simple! You did it, and you've got to pay. 1179 01:15:34,238 --> 01:15:36,741 I'll get claustrophobia, if I'm shut up in there. 1180 01:15:36,742 --> 01:15:38,743 You should've thought of that before! 1181 01:15:38,744 --> 01:15:42,246 Oh, please, Karen, I've got to put these on the bonfire. 1182 01:15:42,247 --> 01:15:43,748 I'm surprised at you, Terry, 1183 01:15:43,749 --> 01:15:45,750 trying to put the blame on your brother, 1184 01:15:45,751 --> 01:15:48,753 knowing what an adverse affect it would have on him. 1185 01:15:48,754 --> 01:15:52,256 You were the one, earlier, that was all for telling the police about Henry! 1186 01:15:52,257 --> 01:15:55,760 God! Some people will stop at nothing, 1187 01:15:55,761 --> 01:15:58,763 even trying to turn a mother against her eldest son. 1188 01:15:58,764 --> 01:16:00,148 Now, go on. 1189 01:16:09,525 --> 01:16:10,526 Oh, well... 1190 01:16:11,027 --> 01:16:13,529 In for a penny, in for a pound. 1191 01:16:19,535 --> 01:16:23,288 I think it's time for bed. What do you think it's time for? 1192 01:16:23,506 --> 01:16:26,959 You are not going anywhere until the police arrive and you tell them it was Henry. 1193 01:16:27,210 --> 01:16:29,179 Look, mate, we've all got our problems. 1194 01:16:29,546 --> 01:16:31,130 Anyway, it's your first offense. 1195 01:16:31,131 --> 01:16:33,133 It's not even my first offense! 1196 01:16:33,634 --> 01:16:35,635 You'll probably only get probation. 1197 01:16:35,636 --> 01:16:38,137 But look, if you... Terry. 1198 01:16:38,138 --> 01:16:39,639 Yeah? 1199 01:16:39,640 --> 01:16:42,642 I'd be awfully grateful if you'd asked for 62 other offenses 1200 01:16:42,643 --> 01:16:45,144 to be taken into consideration. 1201 01:16:45,145 --> 01:16:46,646 Look, Henry. 1202 01:16:46,647 --> 01:16:49,649 If you were a man like Terry, you'd give yourself up. 1203 01:16:49,650 --> 01:16:53,654 If I was a man like Terry, none of this would've happened. What are you, then? 1204 01:16:54,122 --> 01:16:56,156 I'm going by what you've always called me: A pervert. 1205 01:16:56,157 --> 01:16:59,994 Well, now's your chance to reform. But I like being one. 1206 01:17:00,245 --> 01:17:03,330 Mmm. Sorry, I didn't know. 1207 01:17:03,331 --> 01:17:06,550 That's going to be a comfort to you, Terry, while you're sewing your mailbags. 1208 01:17:06,551 --> 01:17:09,052 Karen, as Tom says... get out. 1209 01:17:09,053 --> 01:17:11,555 As Tom says, it'll only be probation. 1210 01:17:11,556 --> 01:17:15,008 Henry, I am not gonna have my mates thinking I go creeping off 1211 01:17:15,009 --> 01:17:18,562 getting my satisfaction from a clothesline! 1212 01:17:18,563 --> 01:17:22,066 Next they'll say I can't be the father of me own kids! 1213 01:17:22,067 --> 01:17:23,485 Look, Henry. 1214 01:17:23,819 --> 01:17:25,904 Terry, try and see it from my view. 1215 01:17:26,405 --> 01:17:29,908 This time I'll get probation, but next time, prison. 1216 01:17:29,909 --> 01:17:32,911 Whereas, if I keep quiet, next time will be my first time, 1217 01:17:32,912 --> 01:17:34,913 so I'll only get probation. 1218 01:17:34,914 --> 01:17:39,417 Don't you see? It gives me a bit of breathing space. 1219 01:17:39,418 --> 01:17:41,870 For god's sake, Terry, do him in. 1220 01:17:42,254 --> 01:17:44,339 Choke a confession out of him! 1221 01:17:44,340 --> 01:17:47,127 Do something to the fat creep before I murder him! 1222 01:17:47,344 --> 01:17:51,964 There is one thing I will not tolerate in my house. 1223 01:17:51,965 --> 01:17:54,767 That is the shouting of abuse. 1224 01:17:55,018 --> 01:17:57,603 Where are you going, Tommy? Bed. 1225 01:17:57,604 --> 01:17:59,104 I see. 1226 01:17:59,105 --> 01:18:01,557 Shirley, if the police come, keep out of the way. 1227 01:18:01,558 --> 01:18:06,111 I don't want them to think I'm running a house of ill repute. 1228 01:18:06,112 --> 01:18:07,613 Good night, all. 1229 01:18:08,114 --> 01:18:10,032 A kiss for your mum on her anniversary? 1230 01:18:20,161 --> 01:18:22,713 Follow that, if you can. 1231 01:18:22,964 --> 01:18:24,548 God, you're disgusting! 1232 01:18:27,001 --> 01:18:29,553 Well, I feel better for that, 1233 01:18:29,554 --> 01:18:32,757 given me a bit of the old sparkle. 1234 01:18:33,057 --> 01:18:34,641 Now... 1235 01:18:34,642 --> 01:18:38,144 Let's all start talking like mad 1236 01:18:38,145 --> 01:18:42,149 so that Shirley will have a chance to slip upstairs. 1237 01:18:42,150 --> 01:18:44,652 Take your time, my dear. 1238 01:18:44,653 --> 01:18:48,656 Just keep walking, Shirley, out the front door. 1239 01:18:48,657 --> 01:18:50,659 But I need him. 1240 01:18:51,159 --> 01:18:52,660 I love him. I've got his baby. 1241 01:18:52,661 --> 01:18:55,663 Not very original, are you? 1242 01:18:55,664 --> 01:18:58,916 Well, I know it doesn't show, but... 1243 01:18:58,917 --> 01:19:01,202 Oh, no. 1244 01:19:01,203 --> 01:19:03,588 He's never gone this far before. 1245 01:19:03,589 --> 01:19:05,375 We ought to make her leave. 1246 01:19:05,708 --> 01:19:10,629 Henry, it's about time you had treatment for your complaint. 1247 01:19:10,880 --> 01:19:12,464 It's affecting your mind. 1248 01:19:12,465 --> 01:19:14,967 You're the one that ought to walk out, Henry. 1249 01:19:14,968 --> 01:19:17,436 I have nowhere to go. 1250 01:19:17,437 --> 01:19:20,223 Neither have I when my parents find out about the baby. 1251 01:19:20,440 --> 01:19:23,525 Thank god there are some of us 1252 01:19:23,526 --> 01:19:25,027 who still have Christian values, 1253 01:19:25,028 --> 01:19:26,979 not many, but a few. 1254 01:19:28,448 --> 01:19:31,234 You don't care about the baby, then, Mrs. Taggart? 1255 01:19:31,402 --> 01:19:34,538 No. I keep seeing it with your ears. 1256 01:20:00,348 --> 01:20:03,234 Well, walked out differently this time, didn't she? 1257 01:20:05,570 --> 01:20:07,071 Going somewhere, Henry? 1258 01:20:08,573 --> 01:20:11,576 I'm just going to look at the bonfire. 1259 01:20:16,031 --> 01:20:19,034 Mum, did you mean what you said just now about Henry needing treatment? 1260 01:20:19,501 --> 01:20:22,003 Why? That's what he'll get if he'll give himself up. 1261 01:20:22,370 --> 01:20:26,591 Well, that's nothing to what you'll get if the police find your car. 1262 01:20:26,959 --> 01:20:30,345 Of course, you don't have to appear in front of any magistrate 1263 01:20:30,546 --> 01:20:31,964 if you forget about Canada. 1264 01:20:40,856 --> 01:20:43,475 All right, love. No! 1265 01:20:43,476 --> 01:20:48,063 But I'm never gonna get into Canada with a pervert label stuck all over me! 1266 01:20:48,064 --> 01:20:50,867 What is it, Terry? 1267 01:20:51,368 --> 01:20:53,203 You looking for an excuse to stay? 1268 01:20:54,621 --> 01:20:56,405 Don't you want to go? 1269 01:20:56,406 --> 01:20:58,908 Would you rather wait for her to forgive you 1270 01:20:58,909 --> 01:21:02,545 for something you did 20 odd years ago, 1271 01:21:02,546 --> 01:21:06,383 and to hell with me and the children, is that it? 1272 01:21:06,717 --> 01:21:10,253 Have you just been kidding me along about Canada? 1273 01:21:14,975 --> 01:21:17,478 Come on, love. 1274 01:21:17,979 --> 01:21:18,980 I don't want to. 1275 01:21:58,437 --> 01:22:00,805 All right, mum. 1276 01:22:00,806 --> 01:22:02,607 We won't go. 1277 01:22:04,860 --> 01:22:07,361 God! You've had a good anniversary. 1278 01:22:07,362 --> 01:22:10,399 Haven't you? It's not over yet. 1279 01:22:10,700 --> 01:22:14,286 I want an I.O.U. For £5,000. 1280 01:22:14,287 --> 01:22:15,738 But that's Terry's money. 1281 01:22:16,122 --> 01:22:19,241 You gave it to him. You told him to blow the lot. 1282 01:22:19,742 --> 01:22:22,995 No doubt he's sorry he didn't take my advice. 1283 01:22:25,632 --> 01:22:26,632 All right. 1284 01:22:26,883 --> 01:22:29,468 I'll sign it. 1285 01:22:29,469 --> 01:22:32,471 I prefer it from Karen. 1286 01:22:32,472 --> 01:22:34,974 She's got it stowed away. 1287 01:22:38,596 --> 01:22:41,514 Will ink do, or would you like it in blood? 1288 01:22:41,515 --> 01:22:43,934 Ink will be fine, dear. 1289 01:23:21,306 --> 01:23:24,392 There she goes again. 1290 01:23:24,893 --> 01:23:28,897 Probably discovered my glass eye. I left it on the pillow. 1291 01:23:28,898 --> 01:23:32,400 Have you signed it, dear? 1292 01:23:32,401 --> 01:23:35,404 They really should not be in my bedroom, you know. 1293 01:23:37,406 --> 01:23:38,907 Thank you, dear. 1294 01:23:38,908 --> 01:23:40,910 Very sweet of you. 1295 01:23:54,925 --> 01:23:56,926 Is she still looking at my glass eye? 1296 01:23:56,927 --> 01:23:59,896 I think it's given her a miscarriage. 1297 01:24:01,848 --> 01:24:03,683 Police, please. 1298 01:24:05,519 --> 01:24:07,019 Good evening. 1299 01:24:07,020 --> 01:24:10,940 I want to report a stolen car, my son's, actually. 1300 01:24:11,158 --> 01:24:13,192 We'd been having a party. 1301 01:24:13,193 --> 01:24:16,946 When he went to look for his car, it wasn't where he parked it. 1302 01:24:18,832 --> 01:24:20,834 Hold on, please. 1303 01:24:20,835 --> 01:24:22,836 You see... 1304 01:24:22,837 --> 01:24:26,290 Whoever pinched the car, pinched the undies. 1305 01:24:26,674 --> 01:24:28,542 Simple? 1306 01:24:28,760 --> 01:24:30,795 Use the phone in the study. 1307 01:24:31,212 --> 01:24:34,298 They want your name, address, registration number. 1308 01:24:36,301 --> 01:24:38,302 Where are you going, Karen? To Shirley. 1309 01:24:38,303 --> 01:24:39,804 Somebody should be sitting with her. 1310 01:24:42,774 --> 01:24:44,274 She'll be all right, mum, won't she? 1311 01:24:44,275 --> 01:24:48,780 She seemed to be in a lot of pain. Not pain, dear, just discomfort. 1312 01:24:48,781 --> 01:24:51,232 Like, hay fever. 1313 01:24:51,233 --> 01:24:55,903 Oh, Terry, if you're going to pick me up at six in the morning, 1314 01:24:55,904 --> 01:24:57,405 you'd better be on your way home. 1315 01:24:57,906 --> 01:25:00,375 You can use Henry's car. 6:00? 1316 01:25:00,376 --> 01:25:03,578 I want to start work on that new office block as soon as possible. 1317 01:25:03,579 --> 01:25:05,330 What office block? 1318 01:25:05,331 --> 01:25:08,467 Remember that plot I bought near the station a few years ago? 1319 01:25:08,717 --> 01:25:12,505 They want an office block there. Didn't I tell you? 1320 01:25:12,806 --> 01:25:17,177 The last thing you said about the business was that we wouldn't be working so hard. 1321 01:25:17,344 --> 01:25:21,815 Ah, that was before you all upset me. 1322 01:25:22,065 --> 01:25:24,149 She's not losing it. 1323 01:25:24,150 --> 01:25:26,151 It's a false alarm. 1324 01:25:26,152 --> 01:25:27,152 That girl. 1325 01:25:27,153 --> 01:25:29,405 Been worrying myself sick about her. 1326 01:25:29,606 --> 01:25:32,191 You could have murdered that baby. 1327 01:25:32,192 --> 01:25:34,193 Yeah, you oughtn't to have done that. 1328 01:25:34,194 --> 01:25:36,029 You went too far this time, mum! 1329 01:25:37,864 --> 01:25:41,668 Listen to them! Just listen to them! 1330 01:25:42,169 --> 01:25:44,170 So righteous! 1331 01:25:44,171 --> 01:25:45,622 According to you lot, 1332 01:25:46,007 --> 01:25:48,091 I've been playing with Shirley, 1333 01:25:48,092 --> 01:25:50,510 like a puppet on a string. 1334 01:25:50,511 --> 01:25:54,381 Why didn't any of you face up to me, tell me to pack it in? 1335 01:25:56,217 --> 01:25:59,719 No, my dears, the finger's not pointing at me! 1336 01:25:59,720 --> 01:26:01,721 It's crooked! 1337 01:26:01,722 --> 01:26:03,723 It's pointing back to all of you! 1338 01:26:03,724 --> 01:26:04,976 Now... 1339 01:26:06,778 --> 01:26:09,980 What did you say? I said, "nuts." 1340 01:26:09,981 --> 01:26:12,316 You were hoping she'd lose that baby. 1341 01:26:12,617 --> 01:26:15,653 God! What kind of a woman do you think I am? 1342 01:26:15,987 --> 01:26:17,989 I'll tell you. 1343 01:26:18,323 --> 01:26:21,909 You wouldn't have been content just knitting away during the French revolution, 1344 01:26:21,910 --> 01:26:23,294 like the other hags, oh, no! 1345 01:26:23,578 --> 01:26:26,631 You'd have been up there, working the guillotine yourself! 1346 01:26:27,049 --> 01:26:30,886 Then you'd have gone round with a basket, selling the heads for doorstops! 1347 01:26:32,889 --> 01:26:36,391 She mustn't get away with this, Tom. 1348 01:26:36,392 --> 01:26:37,893 Yeah? What do you suggest, Karen? 1349 01:26:38,394 --> 01:26:41,396 Put her on a bonfire? Tie her to a stake? 1350 01:26:41,397 --> 01:26:43,399 You love your mum! 1351 01:26:46,402 --> 01:26:49,404 Flames are creeping up round her legs and she thinks old dad's returned! 1352 01:26:49,405 --> 01:26:53,191 No, Tom! No more games! 1353 01:26:53,192 --> 01:26:56,695 This time, we really kill her. 1354 01:26:58,198 --> 01:27:01,951 Just clear out! 1355 01:27:01,952 --> 01:27:06,372 Without all of you lot to feed on, she'd starve! 1356 01:27:06,373 --> 01:27:10,376 Ooh, and I wanna see her starve. 1357 01:27:10,377 --> 01:27:12,712 I wanna see her body shrivel. 1358 01:27:12,963 --> 01:27:15,265 I want to see the cracks appear. 1359 01:27:15,549 --> 01:27:18,552 I wanna see the maggots get at her! Leave her! 1360 01:27:18,969 --> 01:27:22,555 My, god, she's scummy! 1361 01:27:23,056 --> 01:27:24,391 Green with envy! 1362 01:27:27,312 --> 01:27:29,813 Go on, Tom. Get out! 1363 01:27:29,814 --> 01:27:33,317 Go to Shirley. She won't have anything more to do with me. 1364 01:27:33,318 --> 01:27:36,621 She's waiting for you in the car. 1365 01:27:37,622 --> 01:27:39,123 She still wants me? 1366 01:27:39,541 --> 01:27:42,994 Yeah. She's a regular little nutcase. 1367 01:27:43,328 --> 01:27:45,412 Go on, Tom. 1368 01:27:45,413 --> 01:27:47,298 She's got your things. 1369 01:27:50,636 --> 01:27:54,422 I'm leaving you, dear. Don't forget to mention me in your will. 1370 01:27:54,423 --> 01:27:56,007 You'll never leave me. 1371 01:27:56,008 --> 01:27:58,560 I'm leaving with Shirley, 1372 01:27:58,561 --> 01:28:01,062 and I'm getting a special license in the morning. 1373 01:28:01,063 --> 01:28:03,014 Can I be your best man, Tom? 1374 01:28:03,015 --> 01:28:06,518 You can be my best man with pleasure! 1375 01:28:06,519 --> 01:28:10,022 In fact, if you like, you can even be one of the bridesmaids. 1376 01:28:23,203 --> 01:28:25,588 You goaded him into leaving! 1377 01:28:25,839 --> 01:28:28,424 You're like a cancer! 1378 01:28:28,425 --> 01:28:31,927 From the moment you came into this house, the disease spread. 1379 01:28:31,928 --> 01:28:35,881 Look, mum, I know you're upset about... and you brought her! 1380 01:28:36,299 --> 01:28:38,851 I promise you, I'll have your skin for rags. 1381 01:28:38,852 --> 01:28:41,354 And wipe the faces of your children with them! 1382 01:28:41,721 --> 01:28:44,558 God, he's your son! 1383 01:28:44,775 --> 01:28:46,860 He's not a son. 1384 01:28:46,861 --> 01:28:49,230 He gives me the shudders, always has done. 1385 01:28:57,538 --> 01:28:59,823 You've never felt anything for me? 1386 01:28:59,824 --> 01:29:02,576 Is that what you said? 1387 01:29:04,996 --> 01:29:06,630 Is that what you said? 1388 01:29:09,134 --> 01:29:11,920 You mean, it wasn't the accident that turned you against me? 1389 01:29:12,137 --> 01:29:15,723 No, no, no! 1390 01:29:15,724 --> 01:29:19,227 She's never given a damn! 1391 01:29:19,228 --> 01:29:22,064 You've got to get that into your thick skull, Terry. 1392 01:29:22,314 --> 01:29:25,266 To her, you've always been just a wet spaniel with the slobbers. 1393 01:29:25,601 --> 01:29:28,686 Listen, Terry. 1394 01:29:28,687 --> 01:29:30,187 For years, 1395 01:29:30,188 --> 01:29:33,074 you've been waiting for her to show that she cares for you. 1396 01:29:34,911 --> 01:29:38,447 But, love, I know how you feel, 1397 01:29:38,448 --> 01:29:41,834 because I've been waiting for something like that from you. 1398 01:29:42,118 --> 01:29:45,204 Just some little sign 1399 01:29:45,705 --> 01:29:47,706 to show that I'm not just... 1400 01:29:47,707 --> 01:29:50,209 Second best. 1401 01:29:52,211 --> 01:29:55,631 Well, surely my love's better than nothing, 1402 01:29:56,015 --> 01:29:58,050 and that's all you're going to get from her: 1403 01:29:58,468 --> 01:30:01,053 A big fat nothing! 1404 01:30:07,728 --> 01:30:12,231 Well, we better be pushing off, Karen, 1405 01:30:12,232 --> 01:30:14,233 pick up the kids. 1406 01:30:14,234 --> 01:30:17,203 We don't want your mom to start worrying. You know what she's like. 1407 01:30:17,571 --> 01:30:19,573 Don't forget. 6:00. 1408 01:30:23,327 --> 01:30:26,913 I'll be too busy, mum. 1409 01:30:26,914 --> 01:30:31,135 I've got a lot to sort out before we leave for Canada. 1410 01:30:31,136 --> 01:30:32,504 Canada, he says, 1411 01:30:32,804 --> 01:30:37,258 as if it were just outside Wimbledon. What I want... 1412 01:30:37,509 --> 01:30:40,428 Look, it's finished, mum! So forget it! 1413 01:30:42,897 --> 01:30:44,231 Come on, Karen. Terry! 1414 01:30:48,236 --> 01:30:52,239 He's not much to write home about, is he? 1415 01:30:52,240 --> 01:30:55,744 But he's beautiful, really. 1416 01:30:55,745 --> 01:30:58,697 Oh, god! He's beautiful! 1417 01:31:04,170 --> 01:31:06,038 Whoopee! 1418 01:31:23,190 --> 01:31:26,059 He's just like his father, 1419 01:31:26,309 --> 01:31:28,311 another wet spaniel with the slobbers. 1420 01:31:28,645 --> 01:31:31,648 Oh, now, now, mum. You were very fond of dad. 1421 01:31:31,982 --> 01:31:34,533 Of course I was, 1422 01:31:34,534 --> 01:31:35,952 after he'd been laid out. 1423 01:31:36,236 --> 01:31:38,821 You can't mean that, mum. 1424 01:31:38,822 --> 01:31:41,022 Otherwise we wouldn't have been remembering him tonight. 1425 01:31:43,293 --> 01:31:44,293 Well, I... 1426 01:31:44,461 --> 01:31:47,298 I think I'll go upstairs, have my bath. 1427 01:31:48,583 --> 01:31:49,884 Oh, Henry? 1428 01:31:50,301 --> 01:31:52,886 Who was that mucky French artist 1429 01:31:52,887 --> 01:31:56,173 who used to paint fat women getting in and out of baths? 1430 01:31:57,425 --> 01:31:59,310 I don't know, mum. Why? 1431 01:32:01,145 --> 01:32:02,646 Oh, never mind. 1432 01:32:03,147 --> 01:32:04,648 Good night, Henry. 1433 01:32:10,071 --> 01:32:11,572 Good night, mum. 1434 01:32:23,035 --> 01:32:27,038 Carter, this is Mrs. Taggart. 1435 01:32:27,039 --> 01:32:31,043 I know what time it is. Are you my solicitor, or aren't you? 1436 01:32:32,544 --> 01:32:34,045 Very well. Listen. 1437 01:32:34,046 --> 01:32:35,547 First thing in the morning, 1438 01:32:36,048 --> 01:32:38,049 I want you to start legal proceedings 1439 01:32:38,050 --> 01:32:42,939 for the collection of an I.O.U. For £5,000, then I want you to get on to. 1440 01:32:43,189 --> 01:32:45,274 The Canadian immigration people. 1441 01:32:45,275 --> 01:32:47,776 And tell them legal proceedings are being taken. 1442 01:32:47,777 --> 01:32:52,565 Against one of their prospective immigrants: Terrence Oliver Taggart. 1443 01:32:53,900 --> 01:32:56,401 No, I have not finished. 1444 01:32:56,402 --> 01:32:59,404 I want you to tear up Tom's service agreement. 1445 01:32:59,405 --> 01:33:00,906 Sack him. 1446 01:33:00,907 --> 01:33:05,411 He's marrying a... A Shirley something or other. 1447 01:33:05,412 --> 01:33:08,381 Quite sweet, really. She reminds me of myself. 1448 01:33:10,301 --> 01:33:12,802 I want to give her a wedding present. 1449 01:33:12,803 --> 01:33:16,306 £5,000 should do it. 1450 01:33:16,307 --> 01:33:20,177 We'll see how long the marriage lasts with her hands on the purse strings. 1451 01:33:22,513 --> 01:33:24,013 Yes, that's all. 1452 01:33:24,014 --> 01:33:26,015 I'll be around in the morning, 1453 01:33:26,016 --> 01:33:28,518 sign whatever's necessary. 1454 01:33:29,019 --> 01:33:30,020 Good night. 1455 01:33:39,581 --> 01:33:43,167 It's been a lovely anniversary, dad. 1456 01:33:44,119 --> 01:33:45,620 Till next year.