>> Sharon: How did this happen?
How am I ever going to get out
of this?
♪♪
>> Sharon: I should have never
gone there.
How did I think for even one
second that it would bring
healing, that it would bring
justice for you?
Cassie...
You have always been
my guiding light.
I need you now more than ever.
Help me understand how I did
what I did.
Help me to know what to do.
>> Sharon: Please don't hate me.
What happened tonight,
it isn't me.
Yes, I've made mistakes, but
nothing like this.
Is this
the culmination of my life?
Have I always been like this?
Making mistakes
that hurt other people?
Tell me, Mother, what happened?
Where were you going the night
of your accident?
>> Doris: Leave it be.
>> Sharon: I want to know.
>> Doris: Haven't we
suffered enough?
>> Sharon: You're the one
who brought this up, not me.
I have never questioned what
happened that night, and now
the whole story changes?
I don't buy it.
I don't buy whatever it is that
you're trying to prove here.
I don't even know what the truth
is from you anymore.
>> Doris: You want
the truth, girl? Fine,
then I'll tell you the truth.
I'll tell you exactly what
happened that night.
It was raining, remember?
Before you went to Frank's,
I could see it in your eyes.
>> Sharon: See what?
>> Doris: You were gonna do
something you'd regret.
So, I got in the car and I went
after you, and the roads were
slick, and it was raining so
hard I could barely see
and I swerved,
and the next thing I knew,
I was in a hospital and
some doctor was telling me
I was gonna spend the rest
of my life in this!
>> Sharon: Are you saying what
I think you are, Mom?
You think that your accident
and that you're in a wheelchair,
you think that's my fault?
>> Doris: Of course not, Sharon.
I never wanted you to know.
>> Sharon: Maybe
I've always been
plagued by guilt,
by a lifetime of things
I wish I'd done differently,
wrongs that I wish
I couldn't make right.
Something led me here tonight.
You.
Why?
To remember that there have
been a lot of good things
in my life, too.
You are proof of that.
And there are some things that
I would never in a million
years change, like
meeting your dad.
No plans for
Nick Newman's birthday.
>> Nick: Yeah,
it looks that way.
>> Sharon: I could change that.
>> Nick: Oh, yeah?
>> Sharon: Throw you
a little party.
>> Nick: You'd do that for me?
>> Sharon: You want me to?
>> Nick: Oh, yeah.
>> Sharon: Who should I invite?
>> Nick: You.
>> Sharon: Well, I figured
I'd make an appearance.
Who else?
>> Nick: No one.
>> Sharon: You really want it
to be just the two of us?
>> Nick: It'd be the best
present I could get.
>> Sharon: You're wearing it.
>> Nick: What?
My birthday present?
>> Sharon: The
friendship bracelet.
>> Nick: Look, Sharon,
do you think that maybe we could
call it something else now?
>> Sharon: What do you mean?
>> Nick: The way I feel
about you...
it's a lot more than friends.
A lot more.
>> Sharon: And suddenly,
I turned into a princess.
With the world's most
wonderful prince.
What made you decide?
I mean, why now?
What made you decide to propose?
>> Nick: I want to spend
the rest of my life with you.
I didn't see any point
in waiting.
>> Sharon: No one ever made me
feel more loved and protected.
Of course, not everyone was so
happy that we were together.
>> Nikki: Our relationship has
gotten off on the wrong foot.
>> Sharon: And why do you
suppose that was?
>> Nikki: I felt you had
ulterior motives.
>> Sharon: I don't know what
ever gave you that idea.
>> Nikki: Call it intuition.
>> Sharon: Or paranoia.
>> Nikki: Sharon, I really hope
this isn't going to become
unpleasant.
>> Sharon: I'm sorry,
Mrs. Abbott.
It's just, I'm not used to
people disliking me
without a reason.
>> Nikki: It's all about
control, isn't it, Sharon?
Just trying to hang on.
Because you know the damage
you've done is irreparable,
so you take all that guilt and
shame and fear and you unleash
it on all of us.
>> Sharon: Because I'm so evil.
>> Nikki: Very well put.
>> Sharon: Just out of,
um, curiosity,
how do you expect me
to react to all of this?
Would you, uh,
like to see me cry or
be intimidated or lose control,
yell at you?
>> Nikki: Boy, you are
a cool customer, aren't you?
>> Sharon: I just no longer feel
the need to have you walk
all over me.
>> Nikki: Sharon, I didn't mean
to imply--
>> Sharon: You still don't think
that I'm good enough, do you?
I'm not good enough
for your sons.
I'm not good enough to be
a mother to my own daughter.
I'm not good enough to be
a part of your family.
>> Nikki: You know, I'm not sure
here if this sudden erratic
behavior is part of your act
or if you truly are teetering
on the edge.
But you know what?
In any case, I would make sure
that the fire insurance is paid
on this building.
>> Sharon: Oh, and there we go.
From courteous to catty in
record time.
>> Nikki: Hey, I was taking
your manic lead.
>> Sharon: You are one vicious--
>> Nikki: I was willing
to be civil with you.
You don't make it easy, Sharon.
>> Sharon: Oh, is that so?
Hm. Well, how's this for easy?
[ Nikki shouting ]
Now, you have a reason to go
back to hating me
like you always did. Happy now?
[ Nikki gasping ]
Have I always created conflict?
Is that who I am?
Is that what landed me here?
>> Sharon: No, you're right.
Conflict is
not the story of my life.
Because no matter how many hard
times or obstacles that your
father and I faced, we always
managed to find our way back
together again.
>> Nick: I was right, wasn't I?
About the wish you were making
when you were blowing out
the candles.
>> Sharon: Nick.
>> Nick: Do you know how I know
it was about us?
Because it's what I want too,
Sharon.
I want us to put all
our troubles behind us.
I love you and I need you more
than anything in my life.
>> Sharon: It was really hard
for both of us
after Cassie died.
And you...
I don't know how else to say it,
except you shut down.
And I just felt like I was
living with a different person.
Um, and you just,
you didn't want to deal with me.
>> Nick: I was an idiot.
>> Sharon: That was when
everything with Phyllis started.
>> Nick: So all by myself,
I broke up our marriage.
I wish I could, uh...
repair the damage,
make it up to you.
I wish we could go back in time.
>> Sharon: Even when
we weren't together,
that unshakable bond
was always there.
Not that it wasn't tested over
the years.
>> Nick: So there was this--
this guy, Frank.
>> Sharon: Yeah.
>> Nick: Where's your baby?
>> Sharon: I gave it up
for adoption.
I never even saw it.
And under the circumstances,
that was the only thing
I could do.
>> Nick: All these months,
Sharon, you've led me to believe
you were a virgin.
No, you told me
our first time was going to be
so special.
But you were lying to me.
What a fool.
What a fool I've been.
>> Sharon: Nicholas,
please try and understand.
Frank, he was older.
He was real popular.
And I was so naive and stupid.
He told me that he loved me,
and I believed him.
I thought he loved me.
I'm sorry.
I am so, so sorry.
I was so scared
that he would run.
But he stayed.
He stayed right by my side.
You were that baby
I had to give up.
Getting you back was like
a dream come true.
Nick was a little worried about
becoming a father at that point,
but I knew that
he would fall in love with you
just like I did.
Oh, Nick.
I realize how much
you love Cassie.
>> Nick: I know the adoption
is really just a formality.
>> Sharon: No, no, no.
It's much more than just
a formality.
>> Nick: I really can't wait
to make Cassie my little girl.
You know, officially.
>> Cassie: Official?
>> Sharon: We're going to
adopt you, sweetheart.
>> Cassie: You're gonna--
you're gonna adopt me?
>> Nick: That's right.
We're gonna legally make you
our little girl forever.
What do you think about that?
>> Sharon: Finally,
I had everything that
I had always wanted.
I should have known
that it wouldn't last.
>> Sharon: I'm sorry. I--
I didn't bring you
fresh flowers, but I...
I didn't know I was coming.
But you know what?
I have something better.
Our perfect little family.
>> Nick: You know what?
I just thought of something.
We have a surprise for you.
>> Cassie: Surprise? What?
>> Nick: Well,
I guess you're just gonna
have to open it.
>> Cassie: Okay.
>> Nick: We had the initials
"CN" engraved on there.
You know what they stand for?
>> Cassie: Cassie Newman.
>> Sharon: You like it, honey?
>> Cassie: I love it.
It's-- it's the most wonderful
present I-- I ever got.
Except coming to live
with you guys.
>> Sharon: I didn't know
how lucky we were
until that horrible night.
>> Cassie: Okay, how about this?
After tonight, I will go back
to being grounded.
If I could have just this once
with my friends.
There's no school
tomorrow, please.
Please.
>> Nick: Uh, I'll tell you what.
Your bus is gonna be here soon,
so why don't you go on to
school, and your mother and I
will talk about it.
>> Cassie: Oh, thank you.
Thank you.
>> Sharon: Oh, no, we didn't
say yes. We said we'd
think about it.
>> Cassie: Thank you.
Okay, come on, Noah.
>> Sharon: I should have
put my foot down.
I should have never, ever
let you go out that night.
Losing you...
broke me.
It broke me. It broke me.
It broke Nick. It--
Our marriage fell apart.
Even when I started to feel
like I was getting past the
grief, and my life appeared to
be normal, I was--
I was always on the verge
of another downward spiral.
I was in the deep throes
of bipolar disorder
and I didn't even know it.
Your death, through everything
that has happened, it was
always hanging over me.
And now, everything I've done,
everything that has happened,
was because of
that damned night.
>> Sharon: I know what
you'd say.
That there were happy times,
too.
Moments that kept hope alive.
>> Nick: I want to be there
for you and our baby.
>> Sharon: I don't even know for
sure that it's yours.
>> Nick: I do. It is.
>> Sharon: You sound so certain.
>> Nick: Cassie told us that
we were going to have another
baby someday.
>> Sharon: Cassie couldn't
possibly have known.
>> Nick: Sharon, I had...
I had a dream once.
Cassie was alive.
And we did have
another little girl.
>> Sharon: Well, we can't allow
ourselves to believe in dreams,
Nick, because then that would
imply...
>> Nick: What?
>> Sharon: It was all in
God's plan.
We were destined to find our
way back together again,
one day.
And we both know
that's not true.
Faith was the daughter that you
predicted we would have.
And then another miracle
happened.
>> Nick: You can't actually see
Cassie, let alone touch her.
She's gone, Sharon.
As hard as it is to admit,
she's gone.
So, there has to be a logical
explanation for this.
>> Sharon: Like what?
I'm losing my mind?
>> Nick: I-- I don't know.
It could be as simple as
adjusting your medication.
>> Sharon: Well, I stopped
seeing Cassie for a while when
I went back on my medication.
And now, everything's been
perfect, pharmaceutically
speaking.
And I feel great in every other
aspect of my life, except...
>> Nick: Except that you're
seeing our daughter.
>> Sharon: Yes, and that makes
no sense to me.
But Nick, I'm not only seeing
her, I-- I touched her.
I'm feeling her.
>> Nick: Sharon...
>> Sharon: I know it sounds
crazy, but it happened.
I can only hope that this is
some kind of temporary
side effect.
>> Nick: Nah, it doesn't sound
right.
>> Sharon: Well, of course it
doesn't, but what else
could it be?
I thought the pain of missing
you was causing my brain to
play tricks on me.
But then,
Nick found out the truth.
And it was like I got you back.
Only...
it wasn't you.
You don't deserve to
look like Cassie.
You had convinced me that you
felt terrible about what you
had done to me, pretending to
be my little girl, pushing me
to the brink.
I know that you had no one
growing up except for Ian Ward,
who is a horrible man.
And I know that your mother was
absent, so much so she might as
well have been dead.
And I know you're starving
for love.
>> Mariah: You don't know me,
so shut up!
Everything that you think about
me, it's all in your head.
I didn't have to drive you
insane. You were there long
before I came into the picture.
I told you,
I'm not your beloved Cassie.
I'm nothing like her.
>> Sharon: And that is
painfully clear to me.
Cassie would have grown up to
be a kind, a generous young
lady, not somebody who uses her
misfortune for being a thief or
a liar or a tramp.
I was just so angry.
How could someone who looks and
sounds so much like you
not be you?
My heart, it just wouldn't let
my brain accept it.
I just wanted my daughter back
in my life.
>> Nick: She's not like your
daughter, Sharon.
It's not wishful thinking.
She is your flesh and blood.
>> Sharon: Okay, Nick, you're
not making any sense.
>> Nick: I didn't trust Mariah,
so I did some digging
because I had to wonder...
>> Sharon: Wonder what?
>> Nick: Why she looks so much
like Cassie.
Why she resembled her in so
many ways.
>> Sharon: Nick, it's just
a strange coincidence.
That's all.
>> Nick: It's not a coincidence.
Cassie and Mariah are sisters.
Sharon, you had twins.
>> Sharon: But the
mother-daughter reunion
wasn't warm and fuzzy.
I'm really sorry about
everything that was taken away
from you and from us.
I'm especially sorry for
the things I said to you, things
that no mother should ever say
to their daughter.
>> Mariah: Hey, lady,
I'm not your daughter.
I'm not Cassie.
Get it through your head.
>> Sharon: I know
you're not Cassie.
>> Mariah: You called me your
daughter in the storage
facility, and I let it slip
because you were worried.
>> Sharon: It wasn't a slip.
There's a reason Helen Copeland
never acted like
a mother to you.
There's a reason she never felt
like a mother,
because she's not.
>> Mariah: Helen Copeland is not
my mom? Since when?
>> Sharon: Mariah.
>> Mariah: Wait, don't.
>> Sharon: I am your mother.
>> Mariah: No.
>> Sharon: I wanted to
be the mother that
she never had.
I wanted to be the mother that
I never got to be to you.
Now...
have I failed you both again?
>> Sharon: Mariah, she resisted
me at every turn.
But I knew that you would want
me to persevere, and so I did.
I persevered
because I wanted to.
And I just kept loving her and
praying that one day she would
let me in.
Sweetie, you-- you never
call me mom.
I mean, not very often.
Is that a choice you made, or?
I mean, because there's no part
of me that doesn't feel like
I'm your mother now.
>> Mariah: No, no. I-- I...
The woman that I called mom for
years before you, she was never
really like a mom to me.
So, I think the word kind of
gets stuck in my throat.
[ Mariah chuckling ]
But I don't mean it to hurt
your feelings at all.
>> Sharon: No, no.
I mean, you didn't.
I understand.
You've been through a lot.
You were-- You went through
a lot of rough stuff before you
finally found us.
>> Mariah: Do you think that
um, seeing as how this was
Cassie's, do you think
that I could
have that, if it's okay?
>> Sharon: Yeah.
You know, I think your sister
would want you to have that.
Something to connect you.
>> Mariah: Thank you...
Mom.
>> Sharon: Things got easier
after that.
And I grew to accept Mariah for
the special, unique person
that she is.
And...
Mariah is your twin, which
means a part of you is inside
of her for me to love and hold
on to.
And for that,
I will always be grateful.
Being a mom to Mariah and Faith
and Noah, it has helped me.
It's helped me get through the
pain, the grief of losing you.
It helped me move forward.
And, um,
I've had some successes.
I can honestly say,
my life,
it exceeded my expectations.
>> Nick: Baby, I just wanted to
sit down with you and have
a drink and to make a toast.
>> Sharon: To what?
>> Nick: To...
[ Nick sighing ]
...this place.
To our place.
>> Sharon: Our place?
>> Nick: Yes, our place.
Sharon, we got it.
Crimson Lights belongs to us.
>> Sharon: Neil, are you
offering me a job?
>> Neil: I am.
I'm sure you got a million
questions.
>> Sharon: Uh, just one.
When do I start?
>> Neil: Wait a minute.
Don't you want to know the
details of the job?
>> Sharon: We could cut a deal.
We always have.
This is so perfect for me.
This is something great that I
can focus my energies on.
>> Neil: In that case,
welcome back to Jabot.
Give me a hand and a hug.
[ Sharon chuckling ]
>> Mariah: A toast to the oldest
college graduate.
>> Sharon: Hey!
>> Mariah: I'm just kidding.
I'm kidding.
A toast to my mother,
the graduate.
Raising kids,
running a business.
You fought so hard
for that degree.
I mean, writing and reviewing
and studying.
You did it before work,
after work, during work.
With Christian on your lap.
You are my hero.
And this is just one more
reason why I hope to be just
like you someday.
>> Sharon: Aw.
I do have something inside of me
that has helped me keep going
and helped me face
so many challenges.
>> Nick: That bastard raped you.
Matt Clark raped you.
You don't have to tell me
I'm right.
I know I'm right.
I know what kind of
animal he is.
It's not fair.
>> Sharon: No, cancer's never
fair. It just sneaks up on you
when you're least expecting it.
[ Sharon sighing ]
Damn it.
Nick, why, why does this have
to happen now?
Just when things seem to be
working out.
>> Nick: Hey, this is gonna
work out too.
I know it.
>> Sharon: Just give me
a minute, please.
Just a minute before everything
falls apart.
Because if you tell me what
I think you're about
to tell me...
>> Nick: R--
Ray was involved
in the accident.
[ Sharon sobbing ]
>> Sharon: I'm a survivor.
And no one could ever say that
I didn't love my children with
my whole heart.
One of my proudest, proudest
moments was the opening of
Cassidy First Technology.
Transforming Cameron's demented
legacy into a force for good.
And it honored you too,
my sweet girl.
I had no idea that seeing and
hearing your name on a daily
basis would stir up
so much in me.
All of the happy memories were
just being forced out with
memories of loss.
And as hard as I would try,
something was always there to
remind me, or someone.
When I heard that Daniel had
moved back to Genoa City,
I thought
enough years had passed.
I could handle it.
I had no idea that the mere
sight of him would just cause
all of this rage
to come rushing in
and take over.
Just took over.
To the point that I wanted to
hurt him.
And I almost did.
>> Sharon: I didn't hurt him
though.
I wanted to, but I came to my
senses and I stopped myself.
And that's...
That's when Heather came in.
And we fought.
And somehow, she died.
And I know how this sounds,
but I can't remember
how it happened.
I-- I wish I could
claim self-defense,
but from what I do remember,
I don't see how that's possible.
Gosh.
I have wracked my brain.
I must have blacked out.
That's the part that's really
tormenting me, is the not
remembering.
Because it makes me feel hollow.
It makes me feel numb.
And so here I am, Cassie,
asking you what to do.
Please talk to me.
You are inside of me too, just
like Cameron, but you are
my better angel.
Should I just turn myself in,
confess to my crime, and end
this madness?
I will take my punishment and
hope that my family will find
some way to forgive me when
they find out what I've done.
Because honestly...
they are my one remaining
true joy.
My children are the best part
of me.
Proof that...
I did do some things right.
I'm not all bad.
Thank you.
I know what to do now.
>> Faith: Mom, wherever you are,
please call and let us know
you're okay.
We are all so worried.
If you don't want to call,
you can text.
Wait, what is it?
Did you hear from her?
>> Mariah: You know what they
say about comfort
food in a crisis?
>> Faith: What did she say?
Is she all right?
>> Mariah: Wait, you heard
from Sharon?
>> Nick: No, I haven't,
all right? But I have got to go
out and try and find her.
I can't wait here
one more minute.
>> Faith: I'll go with you.
>> Nick: No, girls, I need you
to stay here just in case she
shows up while I'm gone.
>> Mariah: We've called every
place in town she might be.
>> Nick: I have got a few ideas
I want to check out on my own.
>> Faith: You think something
bad has happened to her,
don't you?
>> Nick: No,
I'm sure she's fine.
>> Faith: And if something has
happened to her,
then it's my fault.
If I had just stuck to the
original plan and told her that
I was in trouble, she would be
here now.
>> Nick: It is not your fault.
I've told you that.
You've got to stop thinking
like that.
>> Mariah: Besides, I was the
one who went to Madison and
called her out for lying,
and now she feels cornered.
>> Nick: No one is to blame
here, okay? No one. We--
[ door opens ]
>> Faith: Mom!
>> Mariah Mom.
>> Faith: We called--
>> Mariah: What were you trying
to do? Scare us to death?
Come here.
>> Sharon: I'm sorry.
>> Nick: Are you all right?
Where have you been?
>> Sharon: I'm okay.
Everything is going to be okay.
>> Announcer: Next week on
The Young and the Restless...
>> Lucy: Dad?
>> Daniel: Your mom's not
coming home.
>> Sharon: That's why
I confessed.
>> Nick: Confessed to what?
Captioned by Los Angeles Distribution and Broadcasting, Inc
Captioning provided by Bell Dramatic Serial Company,
Sony Pictures Television and CBS, Inc.
Join us again for "The Young and the Restless."