1 00:00:07,241 --> 00:00:10,878 Charlie and Mattie just sound so good right now. 2 00:00:10,978 --> 00:00:13,547 You know? I'm just-- I'm proud of them and... 3 00:00:13,647 --> 00:00:15,549 I'm really happy that they're talking to Cane again, 4 00:00:15,649 --> 00:00:17,451 for everyone's sake. 5 00:00:17,551 --> 00:00:19,152 That's good. 6 00:00:19,253 --> 00:00:20,854 Yeah, and I think it's good for them 7 00:00:20,954 --> 00:00:22,356 to see Cane and me getting along. 8 00:00:22,456 --> 00:00:25,158 They know you've put a ton of trust in the man. 9 00:00:25,259 --> 00:00:27,027 Yes. Which I know you and Devon think 10 00:00:27,127 --> 00:00:29,129 is a terrible mistake. 11 00:00:29,229 --> 00:00:30,931 Devon's vote counts more than mine 12 00:00:31,031 --> 00:00:33,934 since Chancellor did belong to his grandmother. 13 00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:36,837 Okay, well, if that's the case, then Katherine's vote counts 14 00:00:36,937 --> 00:00:39,306 more than anyone, and she put Cane in charge when she died. 15 00:00:39,406 --> 00:00:41,975 Which is he more than happy to remind us. 16 00:00:42,075 --> 00:00:44,011 Well, you know he has a lot more experience now 17 00:00:44,111 --> 00:00:45,979 than he did then, and, you know, 18 00:00:46,079 --> 00:00:48,916 he has good ideas, he's putting a strong team together. 19 00:00:49,016 --> 00:00:50,717 Including Billy Abbott. 20 00:00:50,817 --> 00:00:52,619 Well, Billy hasn't accepted the position, 21 00:00:52,719 --> 00:00:54,788 so it's a moot point until then. 22 00:00:54,888 --> 00:00:58,025 So who else is on this strong team of his? 23 00:00:58,125 --> 00:00:59,793 He offered a job to Holden. 24 00:00:59,893 --> 00:01:01,962 -To do what? -What do you mean, to do what? 25 00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:03,931 What were you doing before you came to Winters? 26 00:01:04,031 --> 00:01:05,933 You were working in a different field entirely. 27 00:01:06,033 --> 00:01:08,235 That is not the point, though, is it? 28 00:01:08,335 --> 00:01:11,071 Okay, then what is the point? 29 00:01:11,171 --> 00:01:12,773 -Trust? -Exactly. 30 00:01:12,873 --> 00:01:14,708 Okay. Well, I trust Cane. 31 00:01:14,808 --> 00:01:16,143 -Obviously. -Yeah. 32 00:01:16,243 --> 00:01:18,045 And I trust him to do a good job with the company. 33 00:01:18,145 --> 00:01:21,014 Like hire Holden to score points with you. 34 00:01:21,114 --> 00:01:23,750 Okay, my gosh, so you don't like Holden, 35 00:01:23,850 --> 00:01:25,419 you don't like Cane or Billy. 36 00:01:25,519 --> 00:01:27,120 Anyone else I should add to the list? 37 00:01:27,220 --> 00:01:29,623 Lily, you seem to forget I had a front row seat 38 00:01:29,723 --> 00:01:32,726 the last time you and Devon didn't see eye to eye. 39 00:01:32,826 --> 00:01:34,561 He's gonna have an opinion. 40 00:01:34,661 --> 00:01:37,397 Are you sure you can defend this? 41 00:01:44,171 --> 00:01:45,572 Welcome. 42 00:01:45,672 --> 00:01:48,408 I will be right with you. 43 00:01:48,508 --> 00:01:50,444 It's just me. 44 00:01:56,116 --> 00:01:58,151 Probably the last thing you wanna hear 45 00:01:58,251 --> 00:02:00,587 from the last person you wanna see. 46 00:02:04,925 --> 00:02:09,963 ♪♪ 47 00:02:38,025 --> 00:02:39,559 -Hey. -Hey! 48 00:02:39,660 --> 00:02:42,262 -Iced tea? -You know it. 49 00:02:42,362 --> 00:02:44,531 Okay. Take a seat over there. I'll be right there. 50 00:02:44,631 --> 00:02:45,899 Kay. 51 00:02:57,678 --> 00:02:59,680 Okay, talk. 52 00:02:59,780 --> 00:03:02,582 I know you need to. What's on your mind? 53 00:03:04,518 --> 00:03:07,788 Uh...well, Mom's bandages come off tomorrow. 54 00:03:07,888 --> 00:03:09,489 Oh! 55 00:03:09,589 --> 00:03:11,124 And her vision... 56 00:03:11,224 --> 00:03:13,627 I mean, we gotta wait and see. 57 00:03:13,727 --> 00:03:16,797 And even then, you might not have all the answers. 58 00:03:16,897 --> 00:03:19,599 Yeah. Just means more time to, uh, you know, 59 00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:22,969 wait and worry and wonder what Mom's life's gonna be like 60 00:03:23,070 --> 00:03:26,073 if she doesn't get the results that she deserves. 61 00:03:26,173 --> 00:03:29,042 Uh...well, how is she handling it? 62 00:03:29,142 --> 00:03:32,145 I mean, around us she's like really cool. 63 00:03:32,245 --> 00:03:34,781 Seems like she's in total control. 64 00:03:34,881 --> 00:03:38,051 So she's...optimistic. 65 00:03:38,151 --> 00:03:40,854 Yeah. It's like she's braced for the worst, you know? 66 00:03:40,954 --> 00:03:43,390 She's like three steps ahead. 67 00:03:43,490 --> 00:03:45,559 I mean, it seems like at this point 68 00:03:45,659 --> 00:03:47,961 I'm more worried about it than she is. 69 00:03:49,463 --> 00:03:52,432 NIKKI: Seven, eight, 70 00:03:52,532 --> 00:03:55,469 nine, ten. 71 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:03,110 One, two, 72 00:04:03,210 --> 00:04:06,012 three, four. 73 00:04:10,350 --> 00:04:14,354 One, two, three, 74 00:04:14,454 --> 00:04:16,923 -four-- -What are you doing, sweetheart? 75 00:04:25,132 --> 00:04:27,601 So wasn't Stephanie trying to get you to go back to medicine? 76 00:04:27,701 --> 00:04:29,736 -How's that going? -A distraction... 77 00:04:29,836 --> 00:04:32,272 to get me to stay out of your business. 78 00:04:32,372 --> 00:04:34,941 Well, I guess I failed miserably. 79 00:04:35,041 --> 00:04:36,576 If you can't talk to me about it, 80 00:04:36,676 --> 00:04:38,812 how will you convince Devon? 81 00:04:38,912 --> 00:04:40,347 It's just gonna take time, 82 00:04:40,447 --> 00:04:42,549 and he'll have to see the results for himself. 83 00:04:42,649 --> 00:04:45,485 That's assuming it all goes well. 84 00:04:45,585 --> 00:04:46,920 So, tell me. 85 00:04:47,020 --> 00:04:49,689 Are you happy about the Billy offer? 86 00:04:49,790 --> 00:04:51,591 Uh, he's not on board yet. 87 00:04:51,691 --> 00:04:53,460 Meaning you could still stop it. 88 00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:54,995 I'm not gonna stop it. 89 00:04:55,095 --> 00:04:58,198 Cane needs to have autonomy in order for this to work. 90 00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:00,367 Okay. 91 00:05:00,467 --> 00:05:04,004 Does Devon know about Holden? 92 00:05:04,104 --> 00:05:08,108 Uh, no. I'll see him when he gets back. 93 00:05:09,543 --> 00:05:12,879 -It's a business trip. -Yeah, but he'll be back soon. 94 00:05:12,979 --> 00:05:15,482 So you think it's a big enough deal 95 00:05:15,582 --> 00:05:17,184 that it has to be face to face? 96 00:05:17,284 --> 00:05:19,386 Oh, my God. Why do you have to pick apart 97 00:05:19,486 --> 00:05:20,787 everything that I say? 98 00:05:20,887 --> 00:05:24,057 At least I'm calm about it. Your brother won't be. 99 00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:26,960 Why does this make you both so crazy? 100 00:05:27,060 --> 00:05:30,463 Cane can do a lot of damage with his autonomy, Lily. 101 00:05:30,564 --> 00:05:32,833 Okay, so that's it? That's the only reason? 102 00:05:32,933 --> 00:05:35,202 Of course it is! 103 00:05:35,302 --> 00:05:37,637 Okay, well, I don't think it's Devon's. 104 00:05:37,737 --> 00:05:39,940 What else would it be? 105 00:05:40,040 --> 00:05:43,577 I don't know. I just feel like he's been so angry. 106 00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:47,314 He's just annoyed all the time. He has resentment. 107 00:05:47,414 --> 00:05:49,916 I just feel like he hasn't been himself since Dom was kidnapped. 108 00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:52,519 He went to see Mariah to work through it. 109 00:05:52,619 --> 00:05:54,054 Yeah, but did he? 110 00:05:54,154 --> 00:05:56,923 I mean, is he just angry still that it happened, 111 00:05:57,023 --> 00:05:58,925 or is there something else? 112 00:05:59,025 --> 00:06:01,494 Something deeper? 113 00:06:01,595 --> 00:06:04,030 You know, Vick and I are there with her every day, 114 00:06:04,130 --> 00:06:07,334 her constant cheerleaders, just hoping for the best. 115 00:06:07,434 --> 00:06:10,303 There's no reason to be disappointed in advance. 116 00:06:10,403 --> 00:06:14,074 But Nikki doesn't share your optimism. 117 00:06:14,174 --> 00:06:16,610 It's like she's resigned, you know? 118 00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:19,079 Same with Claire. They're both very pragmatic, 119 00:06:19,179 --> 00:06:22,349 both like a "preparing for the worst" kind of thing. 120 00:06:22,449 --> 00:06:25,118 Well, if Nikki's vision doesn't come back, 121 00:06:25,218 --> 00:06:28,054 are there any other options? 122 00:06:28,154 --> 00:06:30,824 I mean, medically, no. 123 00:06:30,924 --> 00:06:32,826 The mass has been removed. 124 00:06:32,926 --> 00:06:36,296 So all the pressure's been relieved off of the optic nerve. 125 00:06:36,396 --> 00:06:38,932 Stephanie assures us that the surgery was textbook. 126 00:06:39,032 --> 00:06:41,301 Everything that can be done has been done. 127 00:06:41,401 --> 00:06:43,603 We just have to wait and see now and hope. 128 00:06:43,703 --> 00:06:46,273 And, I don't know, maybe Mom and Claire are right. 129 00:06:46,373 --> 00:06:48,041 I just don't know. 130 00:06:48,141 --> 00:06:51,611 Nick, this is what your mom needs to do to get through this. 131 00:06:51,711 --> 00:06:53,146 And you do what you need, 132 00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:55,882 just the safest, healthiest way possible. 133 00:06:55,982 --> 00:06:58,518 Yeah. 134 00:06:58,618 --> 00:07:00,720 Gotta stay clean. 135 00:07:00,820 --> 00:07:03,790 That's your job right now. 136 00:07:03,890 --> 00:07:06,493 Yeah. For the rest of my life. 137 00:07:06,593 --> 00:07:10,430 Well, it's like when I got my bipolar diagnosis. 138 00:07:10,530 --> 00:07:14,167 It was just this overwhelming feeling thinking 139 00:07:14,267 --> 00:07:17,370 I'm gonna be fighting this fight every day, the rest of my life. 140 00:07:17,470 --> 00:07:19,773 I know that it's not exactly the same. 141 00:07:19,873 --> 00:07:23,243 For me it was about... 142 00:07:23,343 --> 00:07:25,345 daily medicine and check-ins 143 00:07:25,445 --> 00:07:27,480 with myself and my doctors. 144 00:07:27,580 --> 00:07:30,183 Yeah. And for me it's my meetings 145 00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:32,519 and keeping my stress levels under control. 146 00:07:32,619 --> 00:07:35,422 And knowing when to ask for help. 147 00:07:36,623 --> 00:07:38,458 Yeah. That too. 148 00:07:38,558 --> 00:07:42,329 And being honest when... 149 00:07:42,429 --> 00:07:44,564 a friend asks you 150 00:07:44,664 --> 00:07:47,667 is your mom the only thing on your mind right now? 151 00:07:49,269 --> 00:07:51,271 Yeah, so everything that I say to you, 152 00:07:51,371 --> 00:07:53,340 even though I'm only saying it to myself, right, 153 00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:55,408 in my own head... 154 00:07:55,508 --> 00:07:58,578 it still sounds vaguely threatening. 155 00:07:58,678 --> 00:08:01,114 Because if I put myself in your shoes-- 156 00:08:01,214 --> 00:08:03,783 [chuckles] Oh, that's not a "you" thing... 157 00:08:03,883 --> 00:08:06,586 putting yourself in someone else's shoes. 158 00:08:07,821 --> 00:08:09,823 That's true. 159 00:08:09,923 --> 00:08:12,225 You know, there were two things about you. 160 00:08:12,325 --> 00:08:14,995 You loved, uh, admiration and fear. 161 00:08:15,095 --> 00:08:17,664 'Cause then people would do what you wanted them to do 162 00:08:17,764 --> 00:08:19,499 and say what you wanted them to say. 163 00:08:19,599 --> 00:08:21,001 Not anymore. 164 00:08:21,101 --> 00:08:24,504 Really. The last thing I want is for anyone to be afraid of me. 165 00:08:24,604 --> 00:08:25,905 Yeah, well, maybe you shouldn't have 166 00:08:26,006 --> 00:08:27,974 tried to kill so many of them then. 167 00:08:28,074 --> 00:08:31,444 People have a way of remembering that sort of thing. 168 00:08:31,544 --> 00:08:34,114 Look, I got no weapons, no explosives. 169 00:08:34,214 --> 00:08:35,615 I don't even have a nail file. 170 00:08:35,715 --> 00:08:37,684 There's a security team right outside that door 171 00:08:37,784 --> 00:08:39,719 to make sure that you're safe. We're all going out 172 00:08:39,819 --> 00:08:41,688 for ice cream later if you wanna join us. 173 00:08:41,788 --> 00:08:44,157 -We're getting Mint Chip. -Oh. That's cute. 174 00:08:44,257 --> 00:08:45,692 I was going for harmless. 175 00:08:45,792 --> 00:08:47,260 Needs some work. 176 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:51,998 I'm--I'm not a threat to you. But... 177 00:08:52,098 --> 00:08:54,167 I guess fear is all you're left with 178 00:08:54,267 --> 00:08:56,603 after all of our years together. 179 00:08:56,703 --> 00:09:01,441 I ruined every decent memory you might have had of us. 180 00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:04,677 Not every... memory. 181 00:09:04,778 --> 00:09:07,147 Okay? It's not like you walked around 182 00:09:07,247 --> 00:09:10,250 like some cartoon ogre, Mitch. 183 00:09:10,350 --> 00:09:11,785 [huffs] Matt. 184 00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:14,320 It's okay. You look at me, you see Mitch. I get it. 185 00:09:14,421 --> 00:09:16,322 Yeah, Mitch, Mitch, and Mitch. You as Mitch. 186 00:09:16,423 --> 00:09:20,060 You know what? You were a jerk. I'm not delusional about that. 187 00:09:20,160 --> 00:09:21,828 But you-- 188 00:09:24,931 --> 00:09:26,666 There were also good things, okay? 189 00:09:26,766 --> 00:09:28,701 I know that. There had to be. 190 00:09:28,802 --> 00:09:34,174 Right? After that first glow wore off, I stayed. 191 00:09:35,308 --> 00:09:37,377 You made it worth it. 192 00:09:39,145 --> 00:09:41,581 Less and less. [small laugh] 193 00:09:41,681 --> 00:09:44,417 Until not at all but, you know... 194 00:09:44,517 --> 00:09:46,152 for a while. 195 00:09:48,388 --> 00:09:50,023 I don't know, unless I just-- I don't know, 196 00:09:50,123 --> 00:09:51,858 maybe I just wanted to-- 197 00:09:51,958 --> 00:09:54,094 wanted to see something in there. 198 00:09:54,194 --> 00:09:56,029 I wanted to hope you were what I wanted-- 199 00:09:56,129 --> 00:09:59,432 I don't--I don't--I don't know. I don't. I don't know. 200 00:10:00,900 --> 00:10:02,435 I look back on our years together, 201 00:10:02,535 --> 00:10:05,105 and I remember the glow of the early times also. 202 00:10:05,205 --> 00:10:08,041 I remember clubbing on Sunset and... 203 00:10:08,141 --> 00:10:10,043 Taking coffee up to the top of Mulholland, 204 00:10:10,143 --> 00:10:11,711 watching the sun come up. 205 00:10:11,811 --> 00:10:13,913 More like you calculating the take for the night. 206 00:10:14,013 --> 00:10:15,982 Well, that, too. 207 00:10:18,585 --> 00:10:20,653 Love and... 208 00:10:21,754 --> 00:10:24,958 ...empathy, compassion. 209 00:10:25,058 --> 00:10:27,227 [emotionally] Honesty. 210 00:10:29,863 --> 00:10:32,799 Those were things that you were probably looking to me for, 211 00:10:32,899 --> 00:10:36,169 as your husband...and I think you're on to something. 212 00:10:36,269 --> 00:10:37,337 I think you're probably right. 213 00:10:37,437 --> 00:10:39,172 If you saw any of those things in me, 214 00:10:39,272 --> 00:10:41,141 it was probably just wishful thinking. 215 00:10:43,443 --> 00:10:46,179 I didn't have any of it in me. 216 00:10:48,781 --> 00:10:51,417 Why are you doing the stairs yourself, sweetheart? 217 00:10:51,518 --> 00:10:53,887 Victor, I want to climb the stairs. 218 00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:57,824 I wanna do things myself, but whenever I do, 219 00:10:57,924 --> 00:11:00,360 I can hear the panic in people's voices 220 00:11:00,460 --> 00:11:02,762 -if I bump into a table. -Well, it's not panic. 221 00:11:02,862 --> 00:11:05,165 -It's concern. -Well, whatever 222 00:11:05,265 --> 00:11:07,000 you wanna call it. I... 223 00:11:07,100 --> 00:11:09,169 I feel this urge to protect their feelings, 224 00:11:09,269 --> 00:11:11,337 'cause I don't want them to be upset. 225 00:11:13,606 --> 00:11:16,609 It's the kids. It's the staff. Even you. 226 00:11:17,577 --> 00:11:20,780 But I-I know that you would do anything to keep me safe. 227 00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:22,949 But you would do the same for us. 228 00:11:23,049 --> 00:11:26,386 Yes. I would give you what you want and need. 229 00:11:26,486 --> 00:11:28,655 And right now, I need to know 230 00:11:28,755 --> 00:11:33,393 that no matter what happens tomorrow, it'll be okay. 231 00:11:33,493 --> 00:11:36,062 I want to walk around by myself. 232 00:11:36,162 --> 00:11:38,298 I want to climb stairs. 233 00:11:38,398 --> 00:11:42,268 I wanna know that I can climb stairs, come what may. 234 00:11:43,703 --> 00:11:47,607 Unless you're planning to throw me out again. 235 00:11:51,878 --> 00:11:54,280 I won't ask you to leave, okay? 236 00:11:54,380 --> 00:11:57,383 I mean, not while you're in this condition. 237 00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:00,920 Thank you. 238 00:12:01,020 --> 00:12:03,223 Then I'll get back to memorizing the steps 239 00:12:03,323 --> 00:12:05,091 between the landmarks. 240 00:12:05,191 --> 00:12:06,726 No, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 241 00:12:06,826 --> 00:12:09,429 Why are you doing that? Don't do that now. 242 00:12:09,529 --> 00:12:11,364 Don't do that. I'm here. 243 00:12:11,464 --> 00:12:13,366 Okay? Let me take you to the sofa. 244 00:12:19,906 --> 00:12:22,108 Here. Do this. 245 00:12:22,208 --> 00:12:25,011 Now. Okay. 246 00:12:28,748 --> 00:12:30,617 Very careful. 247 00:12:35,121 --> 00:12:36,422 Okay. 248 00:12:36,522 --> 00:12:38,491 -NIKKI: Whoops. -Turn around. 249 00:12:39,459 --> 00:12:41,594 Sit you down. There we go. 250 00:12:43,296 --> 00:12:45,999 -There we go. Okay? -Thank you. 251 00:12:52,705 --> 00:12:55,875 You know you could have done this by yourself. 252 00:12:55,975 --> 00:12:58,478 [huffs] Eventually. 253 00:13:00,346 --> 00:13:02,815 I think you're capable of anything. 254 00:13:04,884 --> 00:13:06,686 God, I hope so. 255 00:13:11,024 --> 00:13:13,893 You're that worked up about Devon's mood? 256 00:13:13,993 --> 00:13:17,964 It's not just his mood. It's his whole outlook on life. 257 00:13:18,064 --> 00:13:19,966 I feel like he's not himself right now. 258 00:13:20,066 --> 00:13:22,969 He's always been protective when it comes to his family, 259 00:13:23,069 --> 00:13:25,405 the company, Katherine's legacy. 260 00:13:25,505 --> 00:13:27,573 Why does it feel like you're trying to blame his attitude 261 00:13:27,674 --> 00:13:29,375 on Cane being at Chancellor? 262 00:13:29,475 --> 00:13:31,844 I mean, he's been worked up long before that. 263 00:13:34,314 --> 00:13:36,716 I don't know. I guess you're right. 264 00:13:36,816 --> 00:13:39,519 I mean, he's angry, yes, but... 265 00:13:39,619 --> 00:13:41,954 I don't know, it just feels like there's this... 266 00:13:42,055 --> 00:13:45,091 sense of regret underneath. 267 00:13:45,191 --> 00:13:47,727 Now that you say that... 268 00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:50,229 Okay, so you see it, too, then. 269 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:54,267 His conversation with Mariah was supposed to help. 270 00:13:54,367 --> 00:13:57,303 Well, whatever it is, it is still weighing on him. 271 00:13:59,238 --> 00:14:01,974 You know what? Just let it go for now. 272 00:14:02,075 --> 00:14:04,711 -I can't. -No, what I mean is 273 00:14:04,811 --> 00:14:06,612 let me deal with it. 274 00:14:06,713 --> 00:14:08,548 Let me try to get to the root of it. 275 00:14:08,648 --> 00:14:10,950 Okay, well, how am I supposed to just let it go? 276 00:14:11,050 --> 00:14:13,786 Listen, as angry and worked up as Devon is right now, 277 00:14:13,886 --> 00:14:16,889 that's how calm and confident you seem. 278 00:14:16,989 --> 00:14:21,461 And you deserve to do your thing no matter what I said before. 279 00:14:21,561 --> 00:14:24,430 Okay? So let me work on it. 280 00:14:27,900 --> 00:14:29,869 You know, this raw honesty-- 281 00:14:29,969 --> 00:14:31,904 it's definitely new. 282 00:14:33,373 --> 00:14:35,441 -Still wanna lie sometimes. -Oh, yeah? 283 00:14:35,541 --> 00:14:37,877 When do you wanna lie? What do you wanna lie about? 284 00:14:37,977 --> 00:14:41,247 No, no, no, not about this. Not...not this. 285 00:14:41,347 --> 00:14:43,883 Not this. Okay, so then what? Victor stuff? 286 00:14:43,983 --> 00:14:45,852 [stammers] I mean, the dude is a lot. 287 00:14:45,952 --> 00:14:48,855 Yeah, and he's kept you in one piece for all this time. 288 00:14:48,955 --> 00:14:52,525 Yeah. And he's never gonna let me live it down. 289 00:14:52,625 --> 00:14:55,328 Would it be possible for me to just get a drink? 290 00:14:55,428 --> 00:14:58,831 Can I buy a drink? 291 00:14:58,931 --> 00:15:01,033 One. No--one! 292 00:15:01,134 --> 00:15:03,302 -I'll take it. -That is it. 293 00:15:05,104 --> 00:15:06,506 Oh, hell, yeah. 294 00:15:06,606 --> 00:15:08,608 -What? -My brand. 295 00:15:08,708 --> 00:15:10,843 Thank you. Thank you so much for remembering. 296 00:15:10,943 --> 00:15:13,413 Oh, come on. I'm not the one who hit their head 297 00:15:13,513 --> 00:15:15,581 and couldn't remember their own name. 298 00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:19,886 -I remember everything. -Oh, yeah, no, I do too. 299 00:15:19,986 --> 00:15:21,954 I--all of it. 300 00:15:22,054 --> 00:15:23,389 So much fun. 301 00:15:23,489 --> 00:15:24,757 Cheers. 302 00:15:26,025 --> 00:15:27,427 Mmm. 303 00:15:27,527 --> 00:15:28,895 Ah. 304 00:15:28,995 --> 00:15:32,031 So how are things going with Victor 305 00:15:32,131 --> 00:15:33,466 -and everybody else? -Yeah. 306 00:15:33,566 --> 00:15:34,801 -I don't trust any of them. -No? 307 00:15:34,901 --> 00:15:36,335 No. None of them. They don't trust me either. 308 00:15:36,436 --> 00:15:38,371 And look, here you still are. 309 00:15:38,471 --> 00:15:40,973 Yeah, well, gotta see how the movie ends. 310 00:15:41,073 --> 00:15:43,109 Even if they're setting you up? 311 00:15:43,209 --> 00:15:45,278 You just jump right through all their hoops. 312 00:15:45,378 --> 00:15:47,747 Yep. Might end up that they have it in for me, yeah. 313 00:15:47,847 --> 00:15:49,982 So why stay? 314 00:15:52,718 --> 00:15:56,222 Unless you're planning something yourself. 315 00:15:59,792 --> 00:16:02,829 I mean, it's Mom, it's the pills. 316 00:16:02,929 --> 00:16:06,699 It's the fact that Matt Clark lives on our family's ranch. 317 00:16:07,834 --> 00:16:10,570 Even with the guards, just knowing that he is there, 318 00:16:10,670 --> 00:16:12,672 he could be walking the grounds... 319 00:16:12,772 --> 00:16:14,807 Yeah. The dude still exists. 320 00:16:14,907 --> 00:16:16,876 Because...he saved your life. 321 00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:19,712 Yeah. And he claims he's no longer a homicidal maniac. 322 00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:23,149 "Claims." That means you still don't believe him. 323 00:16:23,249 --> 00:16:26,285 He is always in my head. Always. 324 00:16:26,385 --> 00:16:28,721 Everything that he ever did, who he used to be, 325 00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:30,490 what he could still do. 326 00:16:30,590 --> 00:16:32,291 Dad claims he's got this under control, 327 00:16:32,391 --> 00:16:33,926 that he's under a very short leash. 328 00:16:34,026 --> 00:16:35,695 What if that isn't enough? 329 00:16:35,795 --> 00:16:37,930 I can't control what my dad does. 330 00:16:38,030 --> 00:16:41,601 No one can. What I can control is keeping this family safe. 331 00:16:41,701 --> 00:16:44,070 And if that means getting rid of Matt Clark once and for all, 332 00:16:44,170 --> 00:16:46,706 then so be it. 333 00:16:51,878 --> 00:16:55,381 I'll handle this for now. You do your thing. 334 00:16:55,481 --> 00:16:57,283 Okay. Thank you. 335 00:16:57,383 --> 00:16:58,718 -LILY: Hi. -Hey. 336 00:16:58,818 --> 00:17:00,953 I didn't know you were here. I'll take care of this. 337 00:17:01,053 --> 00:17:02,889 -That's not necessary. -So what's-- 338 00:17:02,989 --> 00:17:06,559 Well, we just stopped in for a drink after work. 339 00:17:06,659 --> 00:17:08,628 We also discussed Chancellor 340 00:17:08,728 --> 00:17:11,197 and what it means to Devon especially. 341 00:17:11,297 --> 00:17:12,899 Well, Chancellor means the world to me, too, 342 00:17:12,999 --> 00:17:15,434 so I'm gonna do what I can to do right by Katherine. 343 00:17:15,535 --> 00:17:17,403 And my boss. 344 00:17:18,404 --> 00:17:19,872 Good night. 345 00:17:22,608 --> 00:17:24,677 -[sighs] -[inhales through teeth] Chilly! 346 00:17:24,777 --> 00:17:26,779 [both chuckling] 347 00:17:26,879 --> 00:17:29,715 Yeah, apparently I'm making terrible mistakes 348 00:17:29,815 --> 00:17:32,218 and, you know, I'm gonna rue the day. 349 00:17:32,318 --> 00:17:34,620 Ruing? That's bad. 350 00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:36,622 Yeah. So much ruing. 351 00:17:36,722 --> 00:17:39,525 Well, your family's not gonna cut me any slack. 352 00:17:39,625 --> 00:17:41,427 And I don't blame 'em. 353 00:17:41,527 --> 00:17:44,564 I mean, they mean well, but...it is excessive. 354 00:17:45,932 --> 00:17:48,801 Well, all I can do is wait 'em out. 355 00:17:48,901 --> 00:17:51,571 I'll, uh, just do my best to show up for you, 356 00:17:51,671 --> 00:17:53,172 show up for them, 357 00:17:53,272 --> 00:17:56,208 and then maybe they'll decide that I'm worthy of your support. 358 00:17:56,309 --> 00:17:57,543 I just hope that the backlash 359 00:17:57,643 --> 00:18:00,713 doesn't make you wanna back away from me. 360 00:18:02,281 --> 00:18:04,150 Wanting to erase Matt. 361 00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:07,153 Well, we've both been there. 362 00:18:07,253 --> 00:18:08,988 I mean, that's the thing. 363 00:18:09,088 --> 00:18:10,656 It is always there. 364 00:18:10,756 --> 00:18:13,793 Sometimes it's at a three. Lotta times it's at a ten. 365 00:18:13,893 --> 00:18:15,561 But it's always there for me. 366 00:18:15,661 --> 00:18:18,264 Well, I don't enjoy having him here-- 367 00:18:18,364 --> 00:18:20,600 not at Crimson Lights, not in town, 368 00:18:20,700 --> 00:18:23,736 and I certainly don't enjoy running into him on the ranch. 369 00:18:23,836 --> 00:18:26,739 Not that that happens often. 370 00:18:26,839 --> 00:18:28,874 But, you know, sometimes... 371 00:18:28,975 --> 00:18:31,243 not seeing him is even worse. 372 00:18:31,344 --> 00:18:33,579 Because then that thought 373 00:18:33,679 --> 00:18:37,116 that he's going to strike out starts creeping in. 374 00:18:37,216 --> 00:18:39,352 I mean, then it fades away. 375 00:18:39,452 --> 00:18:41,988 I go back to living my life again, 376 00:18:42,088 --> 00:18:44,423 in spite of him. 377 00:18:44,523 --> 00:18:46,792 So you don't buy that he's changed either. 378 00:18:46,892 --> 00:18:49,629 Well, that's not what I'm saying. 379 00:18:49,729 --> 00:18:53,666 I'm saying the fear is a reflex now, 380 00:18:53,766 --> 00:18:56,435 especially after Cameron Kirsten. 381 00:18:56,535 --> 00:18:58,938 It's just never very far away. 382 00:18:59,038 --> 00:19:01,574 But with Matt, I don't know what to think, 383 00:19:01,674 --> 00:19:03,476 because he saved your life. 384 00:19:03,576 --> 00:19:05,611 I saw that with my own eyes. 385 00:19:07,847 --> 00:19:09,682 Let me ask you something. 386 00:19:09,782 --> 00:19:11,584 Let's say, uh... 387 00:19:12,985 --> 00:19:15,321 Let's say I would have died that night. 388 00:19:16,789 --> 00:19:18,658 Do you think Matt would be walking around town 389 00:19:18,758 --> 00:19:21,027 the way he is? 390 00:19:21,127 --> 00:19:23,095 There's no way to answer that. 391 00:19:23,195 --> 00:19:25,564 He could still have plans for us, Sharon. 392 00:19:25,665 --> 00:19:27,667 Is that why your mind is there, 393 00:19:27,767 --> 00:19:31,170 just focused on erasing Matt? 394 00:19:31,270 --> 00:19:34,140 Because the idea of waiting for him to make a move 395 00:19:34,240 --> 00:19:37,009 is just...too much? 396 00:19:38,344 --> 00:19:40,680 You're worried that I'll get so sick of that feeling 397 00:19:40,780 --> 00:19:43,783 that I might start using again. That's what you're asking. 398 00:19:45,117 --> 00:19:48,320 That was part of my question, yeah. 399 00:19:48,421 --> 00:19:50,289 Or... 400 00:19:50,389 --> 00:19:53,025 would you medicate in order to do 401 00:19:53,125 --> 00:19:55,995 what you feel needs to be done? 402 00:19:56,095 --> 00:19:59,231 Would you take a pill to take a life? 403 00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:02,902 No, I don't have a plan. 404 00:20:03,002 --> 00:20:05,137 I don't. I have like a personal mission 405 00:20:05,237 --> 00:20:07,740 to prove to myself and to the rest of the world 406 00:20:07,840 --> 00:20:09,775 that I'm actually this guy 407 00:20:09,875 --> 00:20:12,278 and I'm not the other guy that I used to be. 408 00:20:12,378 --> 00:20:15,347 'Cause that guy doesn't make any sense to me. 409 00:20:15,448 --> 00:20:17,416 Total waste of time and energy, 410 00:20:17,516 --> 00:20:20,986 money and relationships, and--and my youth. 411 00:20:21,087 --> 00:20:22,621 Sienna... 412 00:20:24,457 --> 00:20:25,658 I'm almost middle-aged. 413 00:20:25,758 --> 00:20:28,728 -Oh, yeah, almost. -And I have nothing. 414 00:20:28,828 --> 00:20:31,697 I don't have anything. 415 00:20:31,797 --> 00:20:34,300 And I wanna build a life. 416 00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,769 I don't know how to do it. 417 00:20:36,869 --> 00:20:38,938 I don't even know if it's possible. 418 00:20:39,038 --> 00:20:42,341 What are you saying, can you...do it, 419 00:20:42,441 --> 00:20:44,810 or will people let you do it? 420 00:20:44,910 --> 00:20:47,146 Because everyone in this town who knows Matt 421 00:20:47,246 --> 00:20:49,115 knows that first and foremost, 422 00:20:49,215 --> 00:20:51,217 you are a liar, at the very least. 423 00:20:53,219 --> 00:20:55,921 And, you know, as clued in about you as I was, 424 00:20:56,021 --> 00:20:57,556 I didn't know about your past, 425 00:20:57,656 --> 00:20:59,091 I didn't know about the drug dealing, 426 00:20:59,191 --> 00:21:01,794 so you wanna talk about wasted years, 427 00:21:01,894 --> 00:21:04,029 trust me, I get it. 428 00:21:06,132 --> 00:21:10,336 You are a smart and sexy, gorgeous woman. 429 00:21:10,436 --> 00:21:13,272 You are, and you deserve better, Sienna. 430 00:21:13,372 --> 00:21:14,874 I should have just left you alone. 431 00:21:14,974 --> 00:21:18,477 Yeah. There are a lotta "should haves," okay? 432 00:21:23,282 --> 00:21:25,384 You deserve 433 00:21:25,484 --> 00:21:27,586 a man, a good man, 434 00:21:27,686 --> 00:21:30,523 who will love you the right way. 435 00:21:41,901 --> 00:21:43,602 Oh, thank you. 436 00:21:43,702 --> 00:21:45,771 You didn't have to do that. 437 00:21:45,871 --> 00:21:48,774 Well, you said you were chilly. 438 00:21:48,874 --> 00:21:50,843 I don't know why. 439 00:21:50,943 --> 00:21:53,279 The days have been warm. 440 00:21:54,914 --> 00:21:56,382 Are you nervous? 441 00:21:57,817 --> 00:21:59,552 My nerves are fine. 442 00:21:59,652 --> 00:22:01,954 Yeah, but are you nervous about 443 00:22:02,054 --> 00:22:04,990 having the bandages taken off tomorrow? 444 00:22:06,158 --> 00:22:08,227 Well, worrying won't change the outcome. 445 00:22:08,327 --> 00:22:09,795 I know. 446 00:22:09,895 --> 00:22:11,964 I wanna be prepared for any result. 447 00:22:16,569 --> 00:22:20,105 Even if you don't regain your vision tomorrow 448 00:22:20,206 --> 00:22:23,175 once the bandages are removed, that doesn't mean 449 00:22:23,275 --> 00:22:26,145 that this will be a permanent condition, does it? 450 00:22:26,245 --> 00:22:28,514 That's true. 451 00:22:28,614 --> 00:22:30,883 But if I can't stand being coddled now, 452 00:22:30,983 --> 00:22:33,052 how am I gonna feel in two weeks... 453 00:22:33,152 --> 00:22:34,820 or two months? 454 00:22:34,920 --> 00:22:37,623 Well, no, there's no need to look that far ahead. 455 00:22:39,225 --> 00:22:42,895 As if you don't plan your moves five steps ahead. 456 00:22:42,995 --> 00:22:44,330 Oh, well. 457 00:22:44,430 --> 00:22:47,233 I know better, and so do you. 458 00:22:47,333 --> 00:22:49,034 And that's what I'm doing. 459 00:22:49,134 --> 00:22:52,605 I'm just looking at all the possibilities. 460 00:22:52,705 --> 00:22:56,742 Because I'm not going to let any of the options defeat me... 461 00:22:56,842 --> 00:23:00,880 even when it comes to the two of us. 462 00:23:04,116 --> 00:23:06,051 Yeah, you know, you're right. 463 00:23:06,151 --> 00:23:09,488 I'm so easily swayed by outside opinions. 464 00:23:09,588 --> 00:23:11,056 -That's not what I meant. -Really? 465 00:23:11,156 --> 00:23:12,358 'Cause it's what you said. 466 00:23:12,458 --> 00:23:14,159 Yeah, I know. I know. 467 00:23:14,260 --> 00:23:16,295 Okay, so you don't think that Devon and Nate 468 00:23:16,395 --> 00:23:18,664 -can change my mind about you? -I think you're your own person. 469 00:23:18,764 --> 00:23:21,033 -I would never imply that. -Well, except you did. 470 00:23:21,133 --> 00:23:22,735 Just a poor choice of words. 471 00:23:22,835 --> 00:23:25,437 -Oh, okay. -And--and--in no way 472 00:23:25,537 --> 00:23:28,274 does that reflect my true feelings about any of it. 473 00:23:28,374 --> 00:23:30,743 Okay, so you were just fishing, then, for me to reassure you. 474 00:23:30,843 --> 00:23:32,945 Do you have to really bust me for every little thing? 475 00:23:33,045 --> 00:23:34,713 you could let a few of these slide. 476 00:23:34,813 --> 00:23:37,182 Why would I let it slide? It's way more fun doing this. 477 00:23:37,283 --> 00:23:39,218 Oh, is it so much fun? Okay, then go for it. 478 00:23:39,318 --> 00:23:40,786 No, you know what? Fine. I'll stop. 479 00:23:40,886 --> 00:23:42,554 -No, no, if it makes you happy-- -No, no, you know what? 480 00:23:42,655 --> 00:23:44,556 I don't even want to anymore because you're a buzzkill. 481 00:23:44,657 --> 00:23:46,091 -Oh, am I? Okay. -Yeah. 482 00:23:46,191 --> 00:23:47,860 Well, then, we'll just move on. 483 00:23:47,960 --> 00:23:50,129 -Great. -Great. 484 00:23:51,130 --> 00:23:53,399 Devon's never gonna be okay with it. And you know that. 485 00:23:53,499 --> 00:23:54,900 That's why you spend so much time 486 00:23:55,000 --> 00:23:56,602 not wanting to talk about it. 487 00:23:56,702 --> 00:23:58,137 Honestly, I don't even know 488 00:23:58,237 --> 00:23:59,905 if this even has anything to do with you. 489 00:24:00,005 --> 00:24:02,474 Something is going on with Devon. 490 00:24:02,574 --> 00:24:05,511 I just...don't know what it is. 491 00:24:05,611 --> 00:24:07,112 Maybe it is about me, though. 492 00:24:07,212 --> 00:24:08,914 Coming back to town. 493 00:24:09,014 --> 00:24:12,251 Being in your orbit, being at Chancellor. 494 00:24:12,351 --> 00:24:14,954 Maybe he feels like he's letting down Neil and Katherine 495 00:24:15,054 --> 00:24:17,656 if he's not fighting to keep me at a distance. 496 00:24:17,756 --> 00:24:20,025 And he wasn't able to protect his son 497 00:24:20,125 --> 00:24:22,094 with that terrible situation that happened with Mariah, 498 00:24:22,194 --> 00:24:25,464 so maybe he's just trying to make up for that. 499 00:24:25,564 --> 00:24:27,933 No, I see what you're saying. I do. 500 00:24:28,033 --> 00:24:29,568 But you're gonna argue with me anyway. 501 00:24:29,668 --> 00:24:32,604 Yeah, because Devon knows that there is nothing 502 00:24:32,705 --> 00:24:35,274 he can do or say to make me go against my own instincts. 503 00:24:35,374 --> 00:24:38,110 So if this is about you, he's just... 504 00:24:38,210 --> 00:24:40,479 gonna have to accept it. 505 00:24:40,579 --> 00:24:42,414 'Cause it's not changing. 506 00:24:42,514 --> 00:24:44,416 I want you here. 507 00:24:46,919 --> 00:24:49,588 Can you give me an answer, Nick? 508 00:24:49,688 --> 00:24:52,658 Is that where you think I am-- drugs and murder? 509 00:24:52,758 --> 00:24:54,560 I'm just asking. 510 00:24:54,660 --> 00:24:57,262 I'm not gonna give myself permission to use again. 511 00:24:57,363 --> 00:24:59,565 I can't do that. Not to my mom. 512 00:24:59,665 --> 00:25:02,368 Look at what she's going through. She's facing blindness. 513 00:25:02,468 --> 00:25:05,871 You don't see her reaching for a bottle of vodka. 514 00:25:05,971 --> 00:25:07,506 I can't let her down again. 515 00:25:07,606 --> 00:25:10,342 I'm not gonna let anyone else that I care about down again. 516 00:25:10,442 --> 00:25:13,245 Well, that's a brutal weight you're carrying-- 517 00:25:13,345 --> 00:25:17,082 protect the family, don't let anyone down. 518 00:25:17,182 --> 00:25:20,953 Is it fair to burden yourself with so much? 519 00:25:22,187 --> 00:25:24,957 Yeah. I should probably just focus on normal life 520 00:25:25,057 --> 00:25:27,926 for a while. You know where we could start? 521 00:25:28,027 --> 00:25:30,362 We could go to the club, see Noah. 522 00:25:30,462 --> 00:25:33,932 I really hated that I missed everyone on his opening night. 523 00:25:34,033 --> 00:25:37,503 Well, why don't I go with you? We can support Noah together. 524 00:25:37,603 --> 00:25:39,405 Let's do it. We leave now, we beat the crowd, 525 00:25:39,505 --> 00:25:42,107 we can get a little face time with the owner. 526 00:25:44,510 --> 00:25:46,211 What the hell is wrong with you, man? 527 00:25:46,311 --> 00:25:48,113 How about you just go drink somewhere else? 528 00:25:48,213 --> 00:25:51,917 I offered. He's been... not horrible. 529 00:25:52,017 --> 00:25:53,819 Now, I thought I made it very clear to you 530 00:25:53,919 --> 00:25:55,988 that you need to stay away from Sienna. 531 00:25:56,088 --> 00:25:59,024 That means you don't look at her, you don't talk to her. 532 00:25:59,124 --> 00:26:01,660 You don't pressure her to try to forgive you 533 00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:04,063 or tolerate you or even to talk to you, okay? 534 00:26:04,163 --> 00:26:06,131 That is the line you do not cross. 535 00:26:06,231 --> 00:26:08,100 Not now, not ever again. 536 00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:10,803 You're gonna tell me what I can do and what I can't do? 537 00:26:10,903 --> 00:26:13,972 You gonna tell Sienna what she's allowed to do? 538 00:26:14,073 --> 00:26:16,942 I'm not sure I'm the real problem here. 539 00:26:24,016 --> 00:26:25,784 You know that is, uh, not comped. 540 00:26:25,884 --> 00:26:27,719 I have to pay for my own drink? 541 00:26:27,820 --> 00:26:29,688 See, if I pay for it, then it could look like 542 00:26:29,788 --> 00:26:31,323 I'm trying to suck up to my boss. 543 00:26:31,423 --> 00:26:34,660 -Oh, my God, you would never. -That's a line I cannot cross. 544 00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:36,361 LILY: [laughing] 545 00:26:36,462 --> 00:26:37,963 Bad timing? 546 00:26:38,063 --> 00:26:39,965 Should I, uh, come back? 547 00:26:40,065 --> 00:26:43,735 Uh, that depends. Are you here on Chancellor business? 548 00:26:43,836 --> 00:26:46,405 -I am. -We, uh, have important things 549 00:26:46,505 --> 00:26:47,706 to discuss. 550 00:26:47,806 --> 00:26:50,175 -Duties, etcetera. -All right. 551 00:26:50,275 --> 00:26:53,212 All right. I will let you get to your conversation. 552 00:26:53,312 --> 00:26:55,214 Uh, wait. 553 00:26:55,314 --> 00:26:56,915 -Dinner? -Yeah. 554 00:26:57,015 --> 00:26:58,050 You can get the check. 555 00:26:58,150 --> 00:26:59,485 We don't want you to be compromised. 556 00:26:59,585 --> 00:27:01,120 Make sure he's paying you enough. 557 00:27:01,220 --> 00:27:03,188 -HOLDEN: Mm. [laughs] -[Lily laughs] 558 00:27:07,926 --> 00:27:10,062 I was... 559 00:27:10,162 --> 00:27:12,898 I was off the mark back then. 560 00:27:12,998 --> 00:27:14,633 W-what? When? 561 00:27:14,733 --> 00:27:16,668 Warning you to stay away from Lily. 562 00:27:16,768 --> 00:27:18,804 I didn't know what I was talking about. 563 00:27:18,904 --> 00:27:20,606 What changed? 564 00:27:20,706 --> 00:27:23,408 Well, I've seen her smile with you 565 00:27:23,509 --> 00:27:26,645 more than the entire time that I've known her, so... 566 00:27:26,745 --> 00:27:29,281 She's got a great smile. 567 00:27:29,381 --> 00:27:32,851 All right, so, Chancellor. 568 00:27:32,951 --> 00:27:35,754 Right. So... 569 00:27:35,854 --> 00:27:39,424 I'm...I'm starting to have second thoughts. 570 00:27:41,627 --> 00:27:43,896 Let's just not talk about that right now. 571 00:27:43,996 --> 00:27:46,431 You have more important things to think about, okay? 572 00:27:46,532 --> 00:27:49,001 More important than the two of us? 573 00:27:49,101 --> 00:27:50,669 Yeah. 574 00:27:52,204 --> 00:27:54,406 So it's just me then... 575 00:27:54,506 --> 00:27:57,676 thinking about us, missing us? 576 00:28:00,279 --> 00:28:03,549 Did I stun you into silence? 577 00:28:03,649 --> 00:28:07,386 Or did you, yet again, walk away without telling me? 578 00:28:07,486 --> 00:28:09,354 When did I do that? 579 00:28:09,454 --> 00:28:11,623 When I came home from seeing the doctor. 580 00:28:11,723 --> 00:28:13,926 You saw more than the doctor. 581 00:28:14,026 --> 00:28:17,396 And then again, when I asked to speak with you. 582 00:28:17,496 --> 00:28:19,765 I had a call to make. 583 00:28:20,666 --> 00:28:23,068 What about now, Victor? 584 00:28:23,168 --> 00:28:25,837 Do you have time to talk about us now? 585 00:28:27,239 --> 00:28:29,007 I'm in limbo. 586 00:28:29,107 --> 00:28:34,112 I'm unsure where things are physically in this room 587 00:28:34,213 --> 00:28:36,381 and emotionally with you. 588 00:28:39,017 --> 00:28:41,720 You're safe here, okay? As long as you need to be. 589 00:28:41,820 --> 00:28:43,155 I told you that. 590 00:28:43,255 --> 00:28:46,758 I have been so angry with you. 591 00:28:46,858 --> 00:28:49,428 Angrier than I've ever been. 592 00:28:49,528 --> 00:28:51,730 And yet... 593 00:28:51,830 --> 00:28:53,498 I feel so safe with you. 594 00:28:53,599 --> 00:28:57,903 When you took my arm to lead me over here, 595 00:28:58,003 --> 00:29:00,706 I felt such a sense of relief... 596 00:29:00,806 --> 00:29:02,874 because I know you care. 597 00:29:04,443 --> 00:29:07,412 But every time I wanna talk to you, 598 00:29:07,512 --> 00:29:10,148 you find an excuse to walk away. 599 00:29:10,249 --> 00:29:12,517 So it makes me wonder... 600 00:29:14,386 --> 00:29:16,822 Is your hatred of Jack 601 00:29:16,922 --> 00:29:19,591 stronger than your love for me? 602 00:29:23,595 --> 00:29:25,831 Are you seriously pretending that I'm the issue... 603 00:29:25,931 --> 00:29:28,333 when you spent your entire life up until what, a month ago, 604 00:29:28,433 --> 00:29:32,104 two months ago, trying to terrorize my entire family? 605 00:29:32,204 --> 00:29:36,008 Making Sienna's life hell? And you--you want to judge me? 606 00:29:36,108 --> 00:29:38,877 Okay, look, I'm not gonna defend any of the things that I've done 607 00:29:38,977 --> 00:29:40,879 to hurt you or anybody that you care about, 608 00:29:40,979 --> 00:29:42,447 not for one second. 609 00:29:42,547 --> 00:29:45,217 But I have zero interest in doing those things ever again. 610 00:29:45,317 --> 00:29:48,220 Okay? I--my history disgusts me. 611 00:29:48,320 --> 00:29:51,590 And I have an actual concept of what human decency is. 612 00:29:51,690 --> 00:29:53,792 Wow! Novel for you, huh? 613 00:29:53,892 --> 00:29:55,093 Yes, it is! 614 00:29:55,193 --> 00:29:57,362 And I'm not gonna screw it up, right? 615 00:29:57,462 --> 00:30:00,065 So there's boundaries. There are rules. 616 00:30:00,165 --> 00:30:03,135 No violence, no vengeance, no stalking, no drug dealing. 617 00:30:03,235 --> 00:30:06,271 None of it! I come in here, I-- 618 00:30:06,371 --> 00:30:07,773 your girlfriend poured me a drink 619 00:30:07,873 --> 00:30:09,207 because we were having a conversation 620 00:30:09,308 --> 00:30:11,276 that we both needed to have. It wasn't just me. 621 00:30:11,376 --> 00:30:13,378 Oh, deep and heartfelt, I'm sure. 622 00:30:13,478 --> 00:30:16,481 Okay, listen up, junior. I currently identify 623 00:30:16,581 --> 00:30:18,984 as a non-psycho, semi-normal person. 624 00:30:19,084 --> 00:30:22,354 All right? You wanna forgive me for all of the things I've done, 625 00:30:22,454 --> 00:30:24,256 go ahead--I don't--your call! 626 00:30:24,356 --> 00:30:25,590 You decide. 627 00:30:25,691 --> 00:30:27,959 But why can't you just let me be? 628 00:30:28,060 --> 00:30:32,898 You have no right to--to stop me from simply existing. 629 00:30:32,998 --> 00:30:35,033 So you realize you don't deserve forgiveness. 630 00:30:35,133 --> 00:30:37,703 Everyone deserves forgiveness. That's what I believe. 631 00:30:37,803 --> 00:30:39,571 Everyone deserves it. I don't know. 632 00:30:39,671 --> 00:30:40,839 Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe there's some people, 633 00:30:40,939 --> 00:30:42,641 and forgiveness is impossible for them. 634 00:30:42,741 --> 00:30:44,042 I don't know, but I'll tell you something, Noah. 635 00:30:44,142 --> 00:30:46,178 I'm tired of trying to have to prove to you 636 00:30:46,278 --> 00:30:48,513 that I'm a human being. 637 00:30:55,487 --> 00:30:57,589 I think I have an idea as to why you have cold feet, 638 00:30:57,689 --> 00:31:00,625 but why don't you sit down and explain it to me? 639 00:31:00,726 --> 00:31:04,062 [sighs] Well, I... 640 00:31:04,162 --> 00:31:06,465 I ran into Devon. 641 00:31:06,565 --> 00:31:08,400 There it is. 642 00:31:08,500 --> 00:31:10,369 He was grabbing a coffee on the way to the airport, 643 00:31:10,469 --> 00:31:12,537 and I thought, hey, why don't I start up a conversation 644 00:31:12,637 --> 00:31:14,272 with my sister's other brother, 645 00:31:14,373 --> 00:31:17,509 say that I might be working at her company. 646 00:31:17,609 --> 00:31:20,345 Let me guess. He didn't exactly congratulate you. 647 00:31:20,445 --> 00:31:23,382 He...he lost his mind. 648 00:31:23,482 --> 00:31:25,517 He doesn't want you, Billy Abbott, or me 649 00:31:25,617 --> 00:31:27,519 anywhere near his grandmother's company. 650 00:31:27,619 --> 00:31:32,224 Well, I loved Katherine too, and we weren't blood, 651 00:31:32,324 --> 00:31:34,793 but we were family in a different way. 652 00:31:34,893 --> 00:31:36,361 Devon is wrong. 653 00:31:36,461 --> 00:31:39,264 He's freaking out about choices that Lily's made. 654 00:31:39,364 --> 00:31:41,066 Right. 655 00:31:41,166 --> 00:31:44,136 Well, right or wrong, I think Devon made himself clear. 656 00:31:44,236 --> 00:31:46,972 And, yeah, who wouldn't love to work at Chancellor? 657 00:31:47,072 --> 00:31:49,608 But there are other jobs, and... 658 00:31:49,708 --> 00:31:51,376 this is--this is family. 659 00:31:51,476 --> 00:31:52,944 -I hear ya. -It's my new family, 660 00:31:53,044 --> 00:31:54,579 and I don't wanna screw that up. 661 00:31:54,679 --> 00:31:58,083 I get it. Believe me, I had the same concerns. 662 00:31:58,183 --> 00:32:01,186 But then Lily reminded me that this is about her decision. 663 00:32:01,286 --> 00:32:03,321 And she stands by it, so... 664 00:32:03,422 --> 00:32:04,723 I respect that. 665 00:32:04,823 --> 00:32:06,391 So do I. 666 00:32:06,491 --> 00:32:08,593 Look, families are messy, 667 00:32:08,693 --> 00:32:10,128 especially the big extended ones. 668 00:32:10,228 --> 00:32:11,663 Allegiances change. 669 00:32:11,763 --> 00:32:13,732 You're not gonna make everybody happy, 670 00:32:13,832 --> 00:32:15,434 so if you're trying to make Devon and Nate happy, 671 00:32:15,534 --> 00:32:18,136 you're gonna be letting Lily down. 672 00:32:18,236 --> 00:32:21,273 I, uh, I guess I didn't see it that way. 673 00:32:21,373 --> 00:32:24,843 Lily hired me to rebuild Chancellor, okay? 674 00:32:24,943 --> 00:32:28,346 And I don't plan on making her regret that decision. 675 00:32:28,447 --> 00:32:30,849 My goal is to build Chancellor into something 676 00:32:30,949 --> 00:32:34,085 that Lily and eventually Devon can be proud of. 677 00:32:34,186 --> 00:32:37,522 And you will. I have zero doubt about that. 678 00:32:37,622 --> 00:32:40,025 Right. But the question is 679 00:32:40,125 --> 00:32:43,061 am I gonna be doing it with you? 680 00:32:45,664 --> 00:32:47,699 [exhales] I'm in. 681 00:32:47,799 --> 00:32:49,801 It's what Lily wants, 682 00:32:49,901 --> 00:32:52,938 and I'm not about to tell her or you no, so... 683 00:32:53,038 --> 00:32:55,941 -Yes. -Whatever you need. 684 00:32:56,041 --> 00:32:58,009 Don't talk to my boy like that in his club. 685 00:32:58,109 --> 00:33:00,111 If you don't want people to see you as a threat, 686 00:33:00,212 --> 00:33:02,180 don't hand them a reason to think you are. 687 00:33:02,280 --> 00:33:04,382 How is any of what I'm saying a threat? 688 00:33:04,483 --> 00:33:06,084 What are you even doing here? 689 00:33:06,184 --> 00:33:07,619 He was having a close and personal conversation 690 00:33:07,719 --> 00:33:10,956 -with Sienna. -[gasps] Are you okay? 691 00:33:11,056 --> 00:33:12,591 Does she look okay? She's right there! 692 00:33:12,691 --> 00:33:15,360 Yeah, and you have no business being anywhere near her, okay? 693 00:33:15,460 --> 00:33:17,796 Nothing will change what you've done to people, okay? 694 00:33:17,896 --> 00:33:21,233 No memory loss, no memories regained, no apologies. 695 00:33:21,333 --> 00:33:24,035 The things that you've done... they can't be undone. 696 00:33:24,135 --> 00:33:26,538 Noah's right. You don't get to make any demands. 697 00:33:26,638 --> 00:33:29,174 You don't get to expect forgiveness. It's not up to you. 698 00:33:29,274 --> 00:33:31,343 Yeah. I think you're both right. I think me trying to prove 699 00:33:31,443 --> 00:33:33,512 to everybody that I'm a better man is a total waste of time. 700 00:33:33,612 --> 00:33:35,213 It's completely pointless. 701 00:33:35,313 --> 00:33:37,849 No one in this town is ever gonna let me just live. 702 00:33:37,949 --> 00:33:40,519 Self-pity isn't going to help your case, Matt. 703 00:33:40,619 --> 00:33:42,587 So I should just leave, right? 704 00:33:42,687 --> 00:33:44,189 Victor's never gonna cut me a break. 705 00:33:44,289 --> 00:33:45,690 He's just using me to get what he wants 706 00:33:45,790 --> 00:33:48,093 until he gets bored or fed up with me or I don't do it. 707 00:33:48,193 --> 00:33:50,328 And then where am I gonna be? It's better I leave town 708 00:33:50,428 --> 00:33:51,830 on two legs instead of in a coffin. 709 00:33:51,930 --> 00:33:54,466 So, yeah, you know what? I-I'm done. 710 00:33:54,566 --> 00:33:57,536 None of you will ever see or hear from me ever again. 711 00:33:57,636 --> 00:33:59,004 I'm out. 712 00:34:06,444 --> 00:34:09,314 I'm afraid, Victor. 713 00:34:09,414 --> 00:34:13,018 I feel so alone in all this darkness. 714 00:34:13,118 --> 00:34:17,589 It's like you all are living in one world and I'm in another. 715 00:34:17,689 --> 00:34:19,424 But my rock, 716 00:34:19,524 --> 00:34:22,160 my support... 717 00:34:23,695 --> 00:34:25,597 He's gone. 718 00:34:25,697 --> 00:34:29,968 And he's--he's civil and kind. 719 00:34:30,068 --> 00:34:35,206 Sometimes he takes my hand and gets my wrap for me. 720 00:34:37,108 --> 00:34:40,679 Is it wrong to hope for more, 721 00:34:40,779 --> 00:34:42,881 to ask for more? 722 00:34:44,349 --> 00:34:46,785 Your strength... 723 00:34:46,885 --> 00:34:50,655 the love you have shown me in the past. 724 00:34:50,755 --> 00:34:54,392 Because if I don't have that, 725 00:34:54,492 --> 00:34:56,561 if I don't have you... 726 00:34:57,896 --> 00:35:00,565 I don't know how to do this. 727 00:35:01,466 --> 00:35:05,370 [crying] 728 00:35:39,638 --> 00:35:42,240 Captioned by Los Angeles Distribution and Broadcasting, Inc. 729 00:35:42,340 --> 00:35:45,243 Captioning provided by Bell Dramatic Serial Company, 730 00:35:45,343 --> 00:35:48,246 Sony Pictures Television and CBS, Inc. 731 00:35:48,346 --> 00:35:51,383 Join us again for "The Young and the Restless."