1 00:00:11,010 --> 00:00:13,012 ♪Love, exciting and new.♪ 2 00:00:13,096 --> 00:00:19,853 ♪Come aboard, we're expecting you♪ 3 00:00:27,026 --> 00:00:32,782 ♪Love, life's sweetest reward.♪ 4 00:00:34,993 --> 00:00:41,082 ♪Let it flow, it floats back to you♪ 5 00:00:42,834 --> 00:00:50,675 ♪the love boat soon will be making another run.♪ 6 00:00:50,759 --> 00:00:58,600 ♪The love boat promises something for everyone♪ 7 00:00:58,683 --> 00:01:00,101 ♪set a course for adventure♪ 8 00:01:01,269 --> 00:01:04,022 ♪your mind on a new romance♪ 9 00:01:07,734 --> 00:01:13,323 ♪love won't hurt anymore.♪ 10 00:01:15,241 --> 00:01:22,040 ♪It's an open smile on a friendly shore♪ 11 00:01:23,374 --> 00:01:33,510 ♪yes, love .welcome aboard, it's love.♪ 12 00:01:59,118 --> 00:02:00,495 Well, sir, I guess everything's in order. 13 00:02:00,578 --> 00:02:01,412 Not quite. 14 00:02:01,496 --> 00:02:02,664 Chief engineer polansky just phoned in sick. 15 00:02:03,790 --> 00:02:04,499 Sick? 16 00:02:04,582 --> 00:02:05,375 Well, now what are we supposed to do? 17 00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:07,210 We can't sail without a chief engineer. 18 00:02:07,293 --> 00:02:09,254 Where are we gonna get one at this late date? 19 00:02:09,337 --> 00:02:11,089 And how come he picked today to get sick? 20 00:02:11,172 --> 00:02:12,841 And why does this always have to happen to me? 21 00:02:14,259 --> 00:02:14,884 Keep Tony santini on board. 22 00:02:16,135 --> 00:02:16,845 Cancel his leave. 23 00:02:16,928 --> 00:02:17,637 Oh, but, captain, it's Thanksgiving. 24 00:02:19,597 --> 00:02:21,391 Tony's made plans with his family. 25 00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:23,393 He's not gonna like this. 26 00:02:23,476 --> 00:02:26,604 Miss McCoy, let me remind you the responsibilities of command are rough. 27 00:02:28,106 --> 00:02:28,982 I'm not going to tell him. 28 00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:31,734 Well, I'm not telling him. 29 00:02:32,777 --> 00:02:34,404 Oh, sure...Sure. 30 00:02:34,487 --> 00:02:35,655 Leave the dirty work to old goph, right? 31 00:02:36,739 --> 00:02:38,366 Well, why does it always have to be me? 32 00:02:41,035 --> 00:02:41,744 Hi, Tony. 33 00:02:43,454 --> 00:02:44,789 Have a wonderful Thanksgiving. 34 00:02:45,373 --> 00:02:46,082 You, too, Tony. 35 00:02:47,375 --> 00:02:48,793 Tony, wait! 36 00:02:49,961 --> 00:02:52,255 Gopher has something to tell you. 37 00:02:52,338 --> 00:02:53,089 Well, make it quick. 38 00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:54,591 My family's waiting for me in the car. 39 00:02:56,134 --> 00:02:57,010 Well, Tony...You have a good vacation. 40 00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:00,263 Thank you. 41 00:03:00,346 --> 00:03:01,222 Tony....polansky just phoned in sick. 42 00:03:01,306 --> 00:03:02,098 He's got the flu. 43 00:03:02,181 --> 00:03:02,849 Ahhh.... 44 00:03:04,809 --> 00:03:06,686 Now don't yell, but you have to stay on board. 45 00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:09,397 Fazoo!!! 46 00:03:09,480 --> 00:03:11,232 I promise my family a vacation in the mountains. 47 00:03:11,316 --> 00:03:12,567 I make all of the plans. 48 00:03:12,650 --> 00:03:14,903 And now you tell me I gotta stay on board and work. 49 00:03:14,986 --> 00:03:15,945 Well, I'm not gonna do it. 50 00:03:16,029 --> 00:03:17,113 Tony, please. 51 00:03:17,196 --> 00:03:17,822 We can't sail without you. 52 00:03:19,324 --> 00:03:19,741 Julie, you understand. 53 00:03:21,367 --> 00:03:22,994 Renatta and little Angelo...They're waiting for me in the car. 54 00:03:25,038 --> 00:03:26,205 And with me, my family comes first. 55 00:03:30,084 --> 00:03:31,753 Tony...how would renatta and little Angelo like to take a cruise? 56 00:03:39,218 --> 00:03:40,136 You mean on this ship? 57 00:03:42,221 --> 00:03:43,306 Why not? 58 00:03:43,389 --> 00:03:44,349 Well, I'll tell you why not. 59 00:03:44,432 --> 00:03:45,266 Come on, Tony. 60 00:03:45,350 --> 00:03:46,351 Go get 'em. 61 00:03:46,434 --> 00:03:47,185 I'd love to see them. 62 00:03:47,268 --> 00:03:48,311 Bring them on board. 63 00:03:48,394 --> 00:03:49,646 I can't wait to meet them. 64 00:03:49,729 --> 00:03:50,647 We're gonna have a wonderful cruise. 65 00:03:51,773 --> 00:03:52,690 Yeah, go get 'em. 66 00:03:56,069 --> 00:03:58,821 You be quiet. 67 00:03:58,905 --> 00:04:00,531 P.a: Good afternoon. 68 00:04:00,615 --> 00:04:05,620 Captain merrill stubing and his crew welcome you aboard our annual Thanksgiving cruise. 69 00:04:05,703 --> 00:04:08,998 One small step for Audrey...One big step for our vacation. 70 00:04:09,082 --> 00:04:09,916 Very crowded. 71 00:04:09,999 --> 00:04:12,669 Bert: All the more people to have fun with. 72 00:04:12,752 --> 00:04:14,379 Besides, it's such a beautiful ship, all...All cheerful and bright. 73 00:04:16,214 --> 00:04:17,298 And crowded. 74 00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:18,967 You stay right there and I'll check on our accommodations. 75 00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:24,847 Well, you just got a little lost. 76 00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:27,308 Which never would have happened if you'd been in my cabin, with me. 77 00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:30,103 Thanks, doc. 78 00:04:30,186 --> 00:04:31,187 But no thanks. 79 00:04:31,270 --> 00:04:33,022 Ah, now, I'm the one who's lost. 80 00:04:33,940 --> 00:04:35,817 Anyway, there's the purser's lobby. 81 00:04:40,947 --> 00:04:41,531 Ooh, excuse me. 82 00:04:41,614 --> 00:04:41,990 Bert? 83 00:04:42,073 --> 00:04:42,407 I'm sorry. 84 00:04:42,782 --> 00:04:43,157 Bert? 85 00:04:43,241 --> 00:04:43,574 I'm here. 86 00:04:43,658 --> 00:04:45,868 I'm here, baby. 87 00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:48,538 Well, we should never have come. 88 00:04:48,621 --> 00:04:50,665 She won't let me out of her sight for a minute. 89 00:04:50,748 --> 00:04:51,416 Come on, dear. 90 00:04:53,418 --> 00:04:54,210 Hello, welcome aboard. 91 00:04:54,293 --> 00:04:55,044 Welcome aboard. 92 00:04:55,128 --> 00:04:55,837 Welcome aboard. 93 00:04:57,463 --> 00:05:01,342 Hi, welcome aboard. 94 00:05:01,426 --> 00:05:02,010 Reverend Whitney. 95 00:05:03,511 --> 00:05:05,430 Oh, Mrs. Sharpe. 96 00:05:05,513 --> 00:05:05,972 What a pleasant surprise. 97 00:05:07,306 --> 00:05:08,266 You can't escape the woman's auxiliary. 98 00:05:08,349 --> 00:05:09,058 They're everywhere. 99 00:05:10,977 --> 00:05:12,437 I don't believe you've met my husband. 100 00:05:12,520 --> 00:05:13,938 Reverend Whitney, Phil sharpe. 101 00:05:14,856 --> 00:05:15,690 Oh, yes. 102 00:05:15,773 --> 00:05:17,025 The empty seat next to Mrs. 103 00:05:17,108 --> 00:05:17,900 Sharpe every Sunday. 104 00:05:17,984 --> 00:05:19,569 Conflict of interest. 105 00:05:19,652 --> 00:05:21,279 Sunday's the only day I can get to the track. 106 00:05:23,031 --> 00:05:24,949 I like to think Phil does his praying away from church. 107 00:05:25,658 --> 00:05:26,993 I do, I do. 108 00:05:27,076 --> 00:05:29,704 But the way the ponies have been running, I need all the help I can get. 109 00:05:31,539 --> 00:05:33,374 Well, this is just wonderful. 110 00:05:33,458 --> 00:05:37,712 I mean, I'll arrange for you to sit at our table, and we can introduce you to just, oh, so many.... 111 00:05:37,795 --> 00:05:40,423 Barbara, Barbara...Don't worry, I'll do my best to keep her out of your hair. 112 00:05:42,341 --> 00:05:53,102 Phillip! 113 00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:54,353 (Speaking Italian) Hey, here's Tony and his family. 114 00:05:56,606 --> 00:05:57,273 Aiding and abetting stowaways. 115 00:05:58,357 --> 00:05:59,609 I can't believe you're doing this. 116 00:05:59,692 --> 00:06:00,651 Well, there's only two more people. 117 00:06:00,735 --> 00:06:02,695 Who's gonna know the difference? 118 00:06:04,781 --> 00:06:05,573 Presto! 119 00:06:05,656 --> 00:06:06,324 Presto! 120 00:06:21,214 --> 00:06:23,424 Grandma ain't too sure about this. 121 00:06:23,508 --> 00:06:25,134 She thinks we're sending her back to the old country. 122 00:06:59,752 --> 00:07:01,129 This was funnier when the Marx brothers did it. 123 00:07:02,630 --> 00:07:03,673 Where are we gonna put everybody? 124 00:07:03,756 --> 00:07:04,590 Don't talk. 125 00:07:04,674 --> 00:07:05,675 You're using up oxygen. 126 00:07:05,758 --> 00:07:08,177 Julie, where are we gonna put everybody? 127 00:07:08,261 --> 00:07:10,680 We can't put 'em in Tony's cabin, he's got a roommate. 128 00:07:10,763 --> 00:07:11,931 Well, we're just gonna divvy everybody up. 129 00:07:13,015 --> 00:07:15,017 Gopher, you can take the kids. 130 00:07:15,101 --> 00:07:19,230 Renatta and Tony, if you don't mind, you can sleep on cots in doc's waiting room. 131 00:07:19,313 --> 00:07:20,731 And uncle gino you can bunk with Isaac. 132 00:07:22,108 --> 00:07:22,775 Uncle gino? 133 00:07:22,859 --> 00:07:24,110 Oh, he's a little hard of hearing. 134 00:07:25,111 --> 00:07:25,695 What's the difference? 135 00:07:25,778 --> 00:07:28,030 He doesn't speak English anyway. 136 00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:30,366 Then that just leaves grandma, and she can stay here with me. 137 00:07:30,449 --> 00:07:32,201 Now all we need's a place for the chicken. 138 00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:32,910 Don't fool with grandma's chicken. 139 00:07:34,245 --> 00:07:35,913 She likes her children to have fresh eggs. 140 00:07:37,165 --> 00:07:37,957 Oh, well, that'll be different. 141 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:40,877 I've never had a chicken for a roommate. 142 00:07:40,960 --> 00:07:42,211 Be grateful she's not into goat's milk. 143 00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:43,045 Yeah. 144 00:07:43,129 --> 00:07:46,340 Everybody just make yourselves at home. 145 00:07:46,424 --> 00:07:48,176 And on the passenger decks, blend in with the other people. 146 00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:49,218 Okay? 147 00:07:49,302 --> 00:07:51,053 When it comes to meals, we'll bring you your food. 148 00:07:51,137 --> 00:07:52,388 And kids, here's a little spending money. 149 00:07:52,471 --> 00:07:53,264 All right. 150 00:07:53,347 --> 00:07:54,390 Thank you. 151 00:07:54,473 --> 00:07:55,266 They're silver dollars. 152 00:07:55,349 --> 00:07:56,601 I get 'em from Las Vegas. 153 00:07:56,684 --> 00:07:57,852 Or Las Vegas gets 'em from me. 154 00:07:59,645 --> 00:08:03,441 Okay, remember...Stay clear of the captain at all times. 155 00:08:04,150 --> 00:08:04,859 Tony. 156 00:08:05,818 --> 00:08:06,861 Gino...mama... 157 00:08:06,944 --> 00:08:19,582 (Speaks Italian) (Speaks Italian) 158 00:08:19,665 --> 00:08:20,374 What did she say? 159 00:08:21,334 --> 00:08:23,085 She says thank you. 160 00:08:23,169 --> 00:08:27,965 The last time she was on a ship, she traveled steerage and now she's finally going first class. 161 00:08:28,883 --> 00:08:30,051 Well, welcome aboard. 162 00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:42,355 Say, this is gonna work. 163 00:08:42,438 --> 00:08:48,736 Say, this is gonna work. 164 00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:49,612 There we are. 165 00:08:49,695 --> 00:08:50,738 Dresses on the right. 166 00:08:50,821 --> 00:08:51,781 Slacks and jackets on the left. 167 00:08:51,864 --> 00:08:52,573 Okay? 168 00:08:53,699 --> 00:08:54,116 Oh, I never remember. 169 00:08:56,869 --> 00:08:57,912 It's all right. 170 00:08:57,995 --> 00:08:59,247 I'll be here to help you dress. 171 00:08:59,330 --> 00:08:59,997 Oh, Bert. 172 00:09:01,499 --> 00:09:03,042 I'm never gonna make it away from home. 173 00:09:06,087 --> 00:09:08,506 Audrey, you're unpacking your makeup case just like every other woman on board this ship. 174 00:09:10,216 --> 00:09:11,801 Well, big deal. 175 00:09:11,884 --> 00:09:16,013 Anybody can tell the difference between a...A tube of toothpaste and a jar of cold cream. 176 00:09:18,849 --> 00:09:19,725 For everything else, I need you. 177 00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:28,150 Sweetheart....your sight has been deteriorating badly for the past year. 178 00:09:28,234 --> 00:09:29,986 Your eyes are never gonna be the same. 179 00:09:30,069 --> 00:09:34,031 So we'll both just have to adjust to it, that's all. 180 00:09:34,699 --> 00:09:35,366 Adjust? 181 00:09:36,617 --> 00:09:38,953 You don't know what you're talking about. 182 00:09:39,036 --> 00:09:41,664 Do you know what it's like not to be able to do anything for yourself? 183 00:09:42,456 --> 00:09:43,207 But you can learn. 184 00:09:43,291 --> 00:09:44,834 You can go to the institute and learn. 185 00:09:44,917 --> 00:09:46,002 Learn what? 186 00:09:46,085 --> 00:09:48,170 Learn how to make brooms and baskets? 187 00:09:48,254 --> 00:09:49,714 You can learn to deal with your problem. 188 00:09:49,797 --> 00:09:50,965 And they'll teach you to read braille. 189 00:09:52,758 --> 00:09:53,926 I'm too old to learn braille. 190 00:09:54,927 --> 00:09:56,137 Oh, no you're not. 191 00:09:57,305 --> 00:09:58,681 And you love to read. 192 00:10:08,774 --> 00:10:12,611 I brought along your cane, just in case you decide to use it. 193 00:10:12,695 --> 00:10:13,404 But I can't use that cane. 194 00:10:14,613 --> 00:10:17,116 People will think i'm...I'm blind. 195 00:10:25,041 --> 00:10:25,708 You are, Audrey. 196 00:10:26,792 --> 00:10:27,585 Please,don't say that. 197 00:10:27,668 --> 00:10:28,502 Don't say that! 198 00:10:28,586 --> 00:10:29,378 I'm sorry, baby. 199 00:10:29,462 --> 00:10:30,212 I'm here. 200 00:10:30,296 --> 00:10:31,005 I'm here. 201 00:10:52,651 --> 00:10:53,152 This is a pleasure cruise. 202 00:10:54,111 --> 00:10:54,987 Don't spoil it for him. 203 00:10:55,863 --> 00:10:57,031 What an awful thing to say. 204 00:10:58,657 --> 00:11:01,243 I was only trying to make his cruise a little more pleasant 205 00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:04,413 by introducing him to some nice young lady, hm? 206 00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:06,290 What's with you and all your cronies? 207 00:11:06,374 --> 00:11:09,085 Why is it so important to get this guy married? 208 00:11:09,168 --> 00:11:11,420 Because he has been a widower for years. 209 00:11:11,504 --> 00:11:13,172 And it is more seemly for a minister to be married. 210 00:11:15,466 --> 00:11:16,884 You're just trying to make sure he doesn't have any fun. 211 00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:18,302 Oh. 212 00:11:26,519 --> 00:11:30,189 Well,now that is a likely prospect. 213 00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:35,986 Why don't you let him pick out his own girl? 214 00:11:37,488 --> 00:11:39,365 Remember what the good book says. 215 00:11:40,783 --> 00:11:42,660 Sex will find a way. 216 00:11:42,743 --> 00:11:43,244 That's not in the Bible. 217 00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:46,580 You have your good book. 218 00:11:46,664 --> 00:11:47,331 I have mine,now. 219 00:11:49,417 --> 00:11:50,584 Pardon me, is this...Is this chair taken? 220 00:11:52,711 --> 00:11:55,214 No, I...I've been saving it for someone exactly like you. 221 00:11:58,551 --> 00:11:59,927 Sure glad I fit the description. 222 00:12:03,889 --> 00:12:04,223 Good book? 223 00:12:04,723 --> 00:12:05,433 No...the best. 224 00:12:09,228 --> 00:12:11,480 Mmmm...they seem to like each other. 225 00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:13,190 You be the flower girl, I'll be the ring bearer. 226 00:12:14,859 --> 00:12:15,526 No, no, no, no. 227 00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:16,986 No. 228 00:12:17,069 --> 00:12:18,320 I'm going to find out her name, 229 00:12:18,404 --> 00:12:21,532 and see if I can arrange for them to be seated at the same table. 230 00:12:21,615 --> 00:12:22,450 Don't be so subtle. 231 00:12:22,533 --> 00:12:23,200 Just handcuff them together. 232 00:12:38,340 --> 00:12:39,133 Good morning. 233 00:12:39,216 --> 00:12:40,259 Enjoying the cruise? 234 00:12:40,342 --> 00:12:41,010 Oh, yes, captain. 235 00:12:41,927 --> 00:12:42,636 She very nice. 236 00:12:44,930 --> 00:12:45,389 Enjoying the cruise? 237 00:12:54,231 --> 00:12:54,565 (Speaks Italian) Prego. 238 00:12:55,107 --> 00:12:55,774 Sono contento. 239 00:13:02,156 --> 00:13:02,865 You can look now. 240 00:13:04,116 --> 00:13:04,867 It's gonna work. 241 00:13:04,950 --> 00:13:05,659 They're all blending in. 242 00:13:24,178 --> 00:13:26,472 Are chairs next to you always empty? 243 00:13:27,348 --> 00:13:28,516 Hi....oh, am I glad to see you. 244 00:13:30,809 --> 00:13:32,186 They told me I'd be sitting with a mr.Willis from winnetka. 245 00:13:33,145 --> 00:13:33,729 Well, if you'd prefer.... 246 00:13:33,812 --> 00:13:35,105 No, no, you sit right down here. 247 00:13:40,110 --> 00:13:41,487 I feel a nice warm glow about this. 248 00:13:44,281 --> 00:13:45,866 You really outdid yourself, honey. 249 00:13:47,159 --> 00:13:49,328 Not only did you arrange for them to have dinner, 250 00:13:49,411 --> 00:13:55,251 but you also arranged for yourself to hear every word they say. 251 00:13:55,334 --> 00:13:58,087 Well, I happen to be a very interested party. 252 00:13:59,547 --> 00:14:01,799 Well, I think I've had enough of your parties. 253 00:14:08,347 --> 00:14:10,015 All I know about you is that you're Jerry Whitney. 254 00:14:10,849 --> 00:14:12,476 What do you do? 255 00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:15,187 Well, don't tell anyone, but...I'm a minister. 256 00:14:16,605 --> 00:14:17,398 I don't believe it. 257 00:14:17,481 --> 00:14:18,274 Yup. 258 00:14:18,357 --> 00:14:19,441 Reverend Gerald Whitney. 259 00:14:19,525 --> 00:14:21,360 I have a church in walnut creek outside of San Francisco. 260 00:14:24,530 --> 00:14:26,323 Well, if you want proof, I've got a sermon that can put you to sleep in three minutes. 261 00:14:29,493 --> 00:14:30,369 Well, I don't usually play twenty questions. 262 00:14:31,870 --> 00:14:32,955 What do you think I do? 263 00:14:33,038 --> 00:14:37,626 Oh, let's see....I know, you're an inter- national spy. 264 00:14:37,710 --> 00:14:39,878 You are really mr.Willis from winnetka in disguise. 265 00:14:40,879 --> 00:14:41,922 You're warm. 266 00:14:42,006 --> 00:14:42,881 I'm a dancer at Las Vegas. 267 00:14:43,632 --> 00:14:44,425 Oh, really? 268 00:14:44,508 --> 00:14:45,634 Hm-hm. 269 00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:47,511 You know that I once thought about taking tap dancing lessons? 270 00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:49,597 Ah, well, that's not really my specialty. 271 00:14:51,223 --> 00:14:53,100 I mean, most what I do is take my clothes off. 272 00:14:59,356 --> 00:14:59,773 Mrs.sharpe...don't overdo it now. 273 00:15:03,611 --> 00:15:04,778 Well, where would you like to begin? 274 00:15:06,363 --> 00:15:06,780 Shrimp cocktail...Prosciutto and melon. 275 00:15:09,283 --> 00:15:09,992 You're not thrown? 276 00:15:10,951 --> 00:15:11,410 By prosciutto and melon? 277 00:15:12,953 --> 00:15:13,412 No, by my profession. 278 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:16,248 No...no, I've always considered stripping an art. 279 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:21,003 I like you. 280 00:15:21,086 --> 00:15:22,630 Why don't you test me with that sermon. 281 00:15:22,713 --> 00:15:23,589 I bet I stay awake... 282 00:15:28,260 --> 00:15:29,428 Well, that was a wonderful dinner. 283 00:15:31,096 --> 00:15:31,972 Hm, yes, sir. 284 00:15:32,056 --> 00:15:34,183 I think the chef's trying to put weight on me. 285 00:15:34,266 --> 00:15:35,017 He keeps serving me extras. 286 00:15:35,100 --> 00:15:35,643 What's this? 287 00:15:38,062 --> 00:15:38,812 Why...that's a snack, sir. 288 00:15:38,896 --> 00:15:40,689 I thought I'd take it back to my cabin. 289 00:15:40,773 --> 00:15:41,440 That's a snack? 290 00:15:42,066 --> 00:15:43,067 That darn chef. 291 00:15:43,150 --> 00:15:44,568 I can't seem to get him to stop. 292 00:15:46,153 --> 00:15:47,571 He wasn't supposed to bring this in here. 293 00:15:53,952 --> 00:15:54,787 She's a stripper. 294 00:15:54,870 --> 00:15:55,871 Who? 295 00:15:55,954 --> 00:15:56,413 That woman. 296 00:15:57,748 --> 00:15:59,041 Where? 297 00:15:59,124 --> 00:15:59,750 The one with reverend Whitney. 298 00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:05,464 You mean, the girl that you set him up with? 299 00:16:08,884 --> 00:16:09,551 Well, good for her. 300 00:16:10,803 --> 00:16:12,388 How could you possibly laugh. 301 00:16:12,471 --> 00:16:14,765 You know, for all the time you spend in church, there's one lesson you've never learned. 302 00:16:18,811 --> 00:16:20,479 To butt out. 303 00:16:41,208 --> 00:16:46,922 Hi. 304 00:16:47,005 --> 00:16:47,673 Can I try? 305 00:16:49,133 --> 00:16:50,592 Oh, I don't think so. 306 00:16:50,676 --> 00:16:51,593 Kids aren't even allowed in here. 307 00:16:59,977 --> 00:17:00,644 You winning? 308 00:17:03,856 --> 00:17:05,524 They don't call me lucky Phil for nothing. 309 00:17:13,699 --> 00:17:14,616 I won! 310 00:17:14,700 --> 00:17:15,784 I won! 311 00:17:15,868 --> 00:17:16,535 Hey, I won! 312 00:17:18,495 --> 00:17:19,163 I won! 313 00:17:38,557 --> 00:17:39,308 Good evening. 314 00:17:39,391 --> 00:17:40,934 Oh, hello, doctor. 315 00:17:41,018 --> 00:17:43,479 Would you think it very forward of me if I asked your beautiful wife for a dance? 316 00:17:43,562 --> 00:17:45,647 Oh...audrey would love to dance. 317 00:17:45,731 --> 00:17:47,024 As a matter of fact, she used to win a lot of trophies. 318 00:17:48,275 --> 00:17:49,818 Well...and I bet you're just as good as ever. 319 00:17:49,902 --> 00:17:50,569 No. 320 00:17:51,862 --> 00:17:52,654 I'd rather not. 321 00:17:52,738 --> 00:17:53,697 Thank you. 322 00:17:53,781 --> 00:17:56,658 But I was at the top of my class at Arthur Murray's. 323 00:17:56,742 --> 00:17:58,202 Bert, please take me back to the cabin. 324 00:17:58,285 --> 00:17:59,328 It's been a long day. 325 00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:00,078 Please excuse us. 326 00:18:09,755 --> 00:18:11,673 Don't tell me that a woman is blind to your charms. 327 00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:17,638 She is blind....But she won't admit it. 328 00:18:24,895 --> 00:18:25,562 Beautiful, isn't it? 329 00:18:26,939 --> 00:18:27,940 Mmmm...very. 330 00:18:31,944 --> 00:18:35,531 Would you believe that all the way through high school and college, 331 00:18:35,614 --> 00:18:37,282 i never kissed a girl on the first date? 332 00:18:38,116 --> 00:18:38,992 Oh really? 333 00:18:39,076 --> 00:18:41,578 It certainly is nice being out with you,again. 334 00:18:53,090 --> 00:18:55,551 For a man who didn't have much practice, you kiss very nicely 335 00:18:55,634 --> 00:18:56,677 oh, it's hereditary. 336 00:18:56,760 --> 00:18:57,469 Mother and father were great kissers. 337 00:18:59,930 --> 00:19:00,806 You just can't beat good breeding. 338 00:19:06,854 --> 00:19:07,896 Isaac... 339 00:19:07,980 --> 00:19:08,522 Good evening, captain. 340 00:19:09,815 --> 00:19:10,858 Room service for the crew? 341 00:19:10,941 --> 00:19:13,277 Oh, warm milk for gopher. 342 00:19:13,360 --> 00:19:14,611 You know he's been having trouble sleeping. 343 00:19:14,695 --> 00:19:15,612 The pressures of work... 344 00:19:16,488 --> 00:19:18,824 Stop your breaking my heart. 345 00:19:23,328 --> 00:19:24,121 Did I hear a chicken? 346 00:19:24,204 --> 00:19:30,294 Noooo...probably a seagull with the croup. 347 00:19:35,382 --> 00:19:36,091 Ah, goodnight, captain. 348 00:19:40,178 --> 00:19:40,637 Goodnight, Isaac. 349 00:19:45,684 --> 00:19:49,897 Okay, little puppy...He had to go to bed without a single bite of shortcake. 350 00:19:49,980 --> 00:19:53,567 And he felt very sorry for himself....And the... 351 00:19:53,650 --> 00:19:54,610 Where have you been, man? 352 00:19:54,693 --> 00:19:55,903 Hey, the fuzz. 353 00:19:57,863 --> 00:19:59,740 Oh, those two fell asleep after the great big fire engine. 354 00:20:01,325 --> 00:20:03,452 But Angelo here has had five stories and he's still going strong. 355 00:20:05,662 --> 00:20:06,788 Angelo, ready to go to sleep now, right? 356 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:08,707 One more story. 357 00:20:09,583 --> 00:20:10,500 Angelo, I'm out of stories. 358 00:20:13,003 --> 00:20:13,795 One more. 359 00:20:13,879 --> 00:20:14,546 Okay? 360 00:20:16,590 --> 00:20:18,133 New seven day cruises to Mexico. 361 00:20:18,216 --> 00:20:18,717 Wait a minute, wait a minute. 362 00:20:19,509 --> 00:20:20,302 Let me try. 363 00:20:20,385 --> 00:20:21,136 Okay. 364 00:20:21,219 --> 00:20:21,970 Here, take this. 365 00:20:23,430 --> 00:20:25,849 Hey, Angelo,now just take this milk. 366 00:20:25,933 --> 00:20:28,977 You know, enjoy it.Now relax. 367 00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:31,855 Now, listen, I'm gonna tell you a story. 368 00:20:31,939 --> 00:20:40,364 Once upon a time there was this cool, laid-back chick with yellow frizz in her hair. 369 00:20:40,447 --> 00:20:41,365 I mean, she was called goldilocks. 370 00:20:44,409 --> 00:20:46,495 And she got lost one day. 371 00:20:46,578 --> 00:20:49,957 I mean l-o-double s-t...Lost. 372 00:20:51,416 --> 00:20:55,504 Now what she did was, she hopfooted to the nearest pad, 373 00:20:55,587 --> 00:21:00,676 and she gloms on the three bowls of grits. There was, 374 00:21:00,759 --> 00:21:06,974 a big bowl,a medium size bowl and a little bowl. 375 00:21:07,057 --> 00:21:09,935 Now what happened was after she had them grits well, 376 00:21:11,770 --> 00:21:14,147 she flakes out for a little shut-eye. 377 00:21:14,231 --> 00:21:15,732 Now, dig this, 378 00:21:17,567 --> 00:21:24,032 these three rinky-dink dudes with big brown fur coats 379 00:21:24,116 --> 00:21:25,367 well, they come boppin' on home. 380 00:21:25,450 --> 00:21:26,910 You know...Ta...Ta.Dee...Dee. 381 00:21:26,994 --> 00:21:34,167 But the big one, you know, he's comin' in there, he got a big afro out to here 382 00:21:34,251 --> 00:21:39,923 and he says....Hey, mama,what you doin' sleepin' in my bed? 383 00:21:41,174 --> 00:21:41,883 The medium size one... 384 00:21:49,141 --> 00:21:49,808 See? 385 00:21:52,477 --> 00:21:52,894 Finish the story. 386 00:22:35,187 --> 00:22:36,646 Oh, boy. 387 00:22:36,730 --> 00:22:39,858 I'm sorry to disturb you, Tony, but we're about five minutes into office hours, 388 00:22:39,941 --> 00:22:40,358 and the parade of hangovers is just about to begin. 389 00:22:42,235 --> 00:22:43,320 If you want to use my cabin to wash up and get dressed.... 390 00:22:47,032 --> 00:22:47,783 Ahhh....gotta go. 391 00:22:47,866 --> 00:22:48,575 Come on. 392 00:22:54,539 --> 00:22:55,207 Good morning. 393 00:22:56,291 --> 00:22:56,958 Morning, captain. 394 00:22:57,709 --> 00:22:59,127 Doctor, I need to... 395 00:23:00,670 --> 00:23:02,422 What are these cots for? 396 00:23:02,506 --> 00:23:03,131 Cot drill. 397 00:23:03,215 --> 00:23:04,382 You know,like a lifeboat drill. 398 00:23:06,843 --> 00:23:10,847 Adam, look, I want to ask you something...And I don't want you to laugh. 399 00:23:11,515 --> 00:23:12,307 Go ahead. 400 00:23:12,390 --> 00:23:13,183 Just don't laugh. 401 00:23:15,394 --> 00:23:16,728 You're gonna laugh, that's for sure. 402 00:23:16,812 --> 00:23:18,355 No, captain, I'm not gonna laugh. 403 00:23:20,065 --> 00:23:24,903 Well, if I can't trust a doctor...Just don't laugh. 404 00:23:25,403 --> 00:23:25,821 Merrill... 405 00:23:25,904 --> 00:23:26,696 All right. All right 406 00:23:29,032 --> 00:23:31,952 have you seen any chickens on the ship? 407 00:23:35,205 --> 00:23:35,872 No, sir. 408 00:23:37,415 --> 00:23:38,708 Have you heard any chickens? 409 00:23:40,752 --> 00:23:41,545 No, sir. 410 00:23:45,006 --> 00:23:45,632 Well....just my imagination, I guess. 411 00:23:48,135 --> 00:23:48,844 Thank you, doctor. 412 00:23:50,137 --> 00:23:50,846 Thank you. 413 00:23:54,808 --> 00:24:04,442 (Doctor laughing) 414 00:24:05,944 --> 00:24:08,238 Ah...i love an early morning swim. 415 00:24:08,321 --> 00:24:10,657 Had the pool all to yourself, even though I'm a lousy swimmer. 416 00:24:10,740 --> 00:24:11,199 Hey, you're not so bad. 417 00:24:11,783 --> 00:24:13,201 Oh, sure. 418 00:24:13,285 --> 00:24:15,829 Come on, I'm the only person I know that could win a gold medal in drowning. 419 00:24:18,790 --> 00:24:19,666 I'll just be a minute. 420 00:24:27,841 --> 00:24:28,550 You know something. 421 00:24:29,885 --> 00:24:30,302 You are absolutely beautiful. 422 00:24:32,304 --> 00:24:33,388 Yeah. 423 00:24:33,471 --> 00:24:36,099 I like the way you look, too. 424 00:24:39,686 --> 00:24:43,732 Oh, boy, you must wow 'em in church. 425 00:24:43,815 --> 00:24:44,608 Jerry, are we crazy? 426 00:24:44,691 --> 00:24:45,525 Uh-huh. 427 00:24:45,609 --> 00:24:46,401 I am. 428 00:24:46,484 --> 00:24:47,152 About you. 429 00:24:48,653 --> 00:24:50,197 Yeah, well, what do we have in common? 430 00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:51,239 We like to swim before breakfast. 431 00:24:51,323 --> 00:24:52,407 Uh-huh. 432 00:24:52,490 --> 00:24:53,366 You swim and I sink. 433 00:24:53,450 --> 00:24:54,618 Oh, come on. 434 00:24:54,701 --> 00:24:56,453 We like the same books and sports and we don't gamble and we... 435 00:24:57,829 --> 00:24:59,581 We love our neighbors as ourselves. 436 00:24:59,664 --> 00:25:00,290 A little biblical reference there. 437 00:25:02,125 --> 00:25:03,418 Yeah, but a minister and a...Exotic dancer. 438 00:25:05,295 --> 00:25:09,007 Hey listen, I will preach to you and you can be exotic for me. 439 00:25:09,507 --> 00:25:10,258 Rev-er-end! 440 00:25:10,342 --> 00:25:10,884 Oh...oh.... 441 00:25:14,512 --> 00:25:15,388 I care for you very much. 442 00:25:18,642 --> 00:25:20,018 Well, I feel the same way about you. 443 00:25:21,519 --> 00:25:23,271 That's something else we have in common, isn't it? 444 00:25:23,355 --> 00:25:24,105 Hm-hm.... 445 00:25:24,189 --> 00:25:24,898 Now...out! 446 00:25:25,815 --> 00:25:26,149 Out, out, out, out. 447 00:25:26,233 --> 00:25:26,816 Out? 448 00:25:27,192 --> 00:25:27,943 Out! 449 00:25:28,026 --> 00:25:29,069 I'll meet you on deck. 450 00:25:29,152 --> 00:25:29,819 All right.Don't be long. 451 00:25:30,862 --> 00:25:31,655 Yeah. 452 00:25:31,738 --> 00:25:32,447 Right. 453 00:25:34,699 --> 00:25:36,201 Oh, good morning, mrs.Sharpe. 454 00:25:36,534 --> 00:25:37,994 Well, that's not what it looks like. 455 00:25:38,078 --> 00:25:39,329 We just came from an early morning swim. 456 00:25:39,412 --> 00:25:40,121 Mmm...mmm...uh-huh. 457 00:25:41,581 --> 00:25:42,624 Didn't you want to check my trunks? 458 00:25:42,707 --> 00:25:43,541 They're still wet. 459 00:25:43,625 --> 00:25:44,292 I am shocked. 460 00:25:45,001 --> 00:25:47,462 And I don't care if you know it. 461 00:25:47,545 --> 00:25:49,422 Now if you persist in carrying on with that sort of woman..... 462 00:25:50,715 --> 00:25:51,549 Woman of what sort? 463 00:25:51,633 --> 00:25:53,009 Well, the sort of woman who would just.... 464 00:25:54,719 --> 00:25:56,763 A woman who would be good and kind that wouldn't take a 465 00:25:56,846 --> 00:25:59,849 pot-shot at another human being if her life depended on it. 466 00:25:59,933 --> 00:26:03,603 Well, I just hope you have sense enough not to let this go any further. 467 00:26:03,687 --> 00:26:07,274 Mrs.sharpe, this is really none of your concern. 468 00:26:07,899 --> 00:26:09,776 Probably not. 469 00:26:09,859 --> 00:26:13,446 But the board of trustees will certainly make it theirs. 470 00:26:33,591 --> 00:26:34,259 Why don't you play shuffleboard? 471 00:26:35,719 --> 00:26:36,344 You know you love shuffleboard. 472 00:26:37,971 --> 00:26:39,514 I'll just sit here. 473 00:26:39,597 --> 00:26:41,558 I won't leave you here alone with nothing to do. 474 00:26:41,641 --> 00:26:42,350 How 'bout dominoes. 475 00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:44,686 Oh, Bert, you know I hate dominoes. 476 00:26:47,439 --> 00:26:48,815 Then we'll just relax and enjoy the sun..... 477 00:26:55,447 --> 00:26:57,115 I've got an idea. 478 00:26:57,198 --> 00:27:02,412 Why don't I buy my best girl a drink before she goes for her beauty parlor appointment, huh? 479 00:27:02,495 --> 00:27:03,204 What beauty parlor appointment? 480 00:27:04,289 --> 00:27:05,332 The one I made for you. 481 00:27:05,415 --> 00:27:06,416 Why? 482 00:27:06,499 --> 00:27:07,834 Don't I look all right? 483 00:27:09,085 --> 00:27:10,211 Is every body staring at me? 484 00:27:11,296 --> 00:27:13,673 Audrey, nobody's staring at you, 485 00:27:13,757 --> 00:27:16,676 but you always went for your beauty parlor appointment once a week. 486 00:27:16,760 --> 00:27:17,761 Why change now? 487 00:27:19,804 --> 00:27:20,513 Everything's changed now. 488 00:27:27,354 --> 00:27:30,899 In my considered professional opinion, I'd say you have a sore back. 489 00:27:30,982 --> 00:27:31,941 It's been that way all morning. 490 00:27:32,025 --> 00:27:34,944 I hope uncle gino slept well. 491 00:27:35,028 --> 00:27:37,572 No one over eight years old should have to sleep on a cot. 492 00:27:37,655 --> 00:27:40,408 Ah, you think babysitting is more fun, hm? 493 00:27:40,492 --> 00:27:42,160 How 'bout sleeping with a chicken clucking all night? 494 00:27:42,911 --> 00:27:44,120 At least you know it's real. 495 00:27:44,204 --> 00:27:45,372 The captain thinks he's losing his marbles. 496 00:27:46,706 --> 00:27:47,749 Wait a minute. 497 00:27:47,832 --> 00:27:49,000 Why is my mouth starting to water? 498 00:27:51,002 --> 00:27:51,795 Garlic... 499 00:27:51,878 --> 00:27:52,712 Onions... 500 00:27:52,796 --> 00:27:53,797 Tomato sauce... 501 00:27:53,880 --> 00:27:54,547 You're all losing your marbles. 502 00:28:02,472 --> 00:28:03,348 Oh....i hope you didn't have lunch. 503 00:28:04,140 --> 00:28:05,183 We love you. 504 00:28:05,266 --> 00:28:06,768 And we wanted to show you how much. 505 00:28:06,851 --> 00:28:13,108 Hey, you know what we need here is some chianti. 506 00:28:16,653 --> 00:28:18,321 Well, listen, I'll go liberate a bottle.Okay? 507 00:28:18,405 --> 00:28:19,239 Okay. 508 00:28:19,322 --> 00:28:20,115 Oh. 509 00:28:20,198 --> 00:28:20,949 Don't eat everything up. 510 00:28:21,032 --> 00:28:22,283 I'll be back in a minute. 511 00:28:22,367 --> 00:28:23,451 Save me some. Okay? 512 00:28:23,535 --> 00:28:24,202 Hurry back. 513 00:28:26,204 --> 00:28:27,455 Hey, Tony, how do you stand it. 514 00:28:27,539 --> 00:28:29,791 Stand what? It's my family. 515 00:28:31,000 --> 00:28:31,835 The best thing in the whole world. 516 00:28:32,710 --> 00:28:33,628 Without the noise I go crazy. 517 00:28:34,212 --> 00:28:34,879 Yeah. 518 00:28:34,963 --> 00:28:35,004 And what about when you're tired? 519 00:28:36,756 --> 00:28:38,133 When I'm tired I get off the ship, 520 00:28:38,216 --> 00:28:43,721 i come home to three shining little faces and my beautiful wife renatta. 521 00:28:55,024 --> 00:28:55,483 A chicken? 522 00:29:01,614 --> 00:29:03,324 I thought I was losing my mind. 523 00:29:18,298 --> 00:29:20,467 Dinner's ready everybody....Angelo? 524 00:29:21,426 --> 00:29:22,135 Angelo? 525 00:29:22,927 --> 00:29:23,595 He's not here. 526 00:29:25,054 --> 00:29:25,805 And neither is the chicken. 527 00:29:25,889 --> 00:29:26,556 Oh, no. 528 00:29:31,227 --> 00:29:33,521 Would you like to explain this chicken? 529 00:29:34,439 --> 00:29:35,190 Of course, sir. 530 00:29:35,273 --> 00:29:37,734 But....first how 'bout some spaghetti? 531 00:30:03,635 --> 00:30:04,302 Hi. 532 00:30:04,385 --> 00:30:05,512 I've been lookin' all over for you. 533 00:30:05,595 --> 00:30:08,389 You know that desertion on the high seas is a serious crime. 534 00:30:08,473 --> 00:30:10,016 I could have you thrown in the brig. 535 00:30:10,099 --> 00:30:10,892 I'm sorry. 536 00:30:10,975 --> 00:30:11,643 I've been hiding out. 537 00:30:12,936 --> 00:30:14,312 I realized I'm becoming an embarrassment to you. 538 00:30:16,564 --> 00:30:18,191 Embarrassment? 539 00:30:18,274 --> 00:30:19,526 Jerry, I heard what that mrs.Sharpe said. 540 00:30:20,693 --> 00:30:23,071 Now what about your board of trustees...Huh? 541 00:30:23,154 --> 00:30:26,366 Oh...let me tell you something about the life of a minister. 542 00:30:26,449 --> 00:30:29,577 Every move that he makes is subject to the scrutiny of the board and 543 00:30:29,661 --> 00:30:33,456 and the ladies auxiliary and every other single member of this congregation. 544 00:30:33,540 --> 00:30:37,418 But in order to lead my flock, I first have to be in charge of my own life. 545 00:30:37,502 --> 00:30:38,920 I have to do what I believe in. 546 00:30:42,382 --> 00:30:44,050 This above all to thine own self be true. 547 00:30:44,717 --> 00:30:45,718 Right? 548 00:30:45,802 --> 00:30:47,512 Well, it's not the Bible, but Shakespeare's not bad. 549 00:30:49,097 --> 00:30:51,307 You know with a little practice, you'd make a... 550 00:30:53,643 --> 00:31:01,818 A great minister's wife. 551 00:31:01,901 --> 00:31:03,444 I'll wait for you in the cabin. 552 00:31:03,528 --> 00:31:04,779 Have them call me when you're done. 553 00:31:04,862 --> 00:31:05,530 No...no. 554 00:31:06,281 --> 00:31:07,490 You be back in an hour. 555 00:31:07,574 --> 00:31:08,741 I don't want to wait here alone. 556 00:31:09,742 --> 00:31:10,451 I'll be here. 557 00:31:11,703 --> 00:31:12,829 I made your next appointment for four thirty. 558 00:31:14,914 --> 00:31:15,623 Oh, mrs.Wyler? 559 00:31:15,915 --> 00:31:16,332 Yes? 560 00:31:16,416 --> 00:31:17,333 We're ready for you. 561 00:31:17,417 --> 00:31:19,794 My wife needs a little help...Sprained her ankle. 562 00:31:20,211 --> 00:31:21,045 Oh, I'm sorry. 563 00:31:21,129 --> 00:31:22,005 Of course I'll help you. 564 00:31:23,214 --> 00:31:24,173 See you in an hour. 565 00:31:24,257 --> 00:31:25,425 We'll have her gorgeous for you. 566 00:31:28,011 --> 00:31:30,138 Mr.wyler? 567 00:31:30,221 --> 00:31:35,268 This is absolutely none of my business....But why did you say your wife sprained her ankle? 568 00:31:35,351 --> 00:31:37,103 Well, what did you want me to say? 569 00:31:37,186 --> 00:31:38,146 What's wrong with the truth? 570 00:31:38,229 --> 00:31:41,274 That she can't see...At all. 571 00:31:41,357 --> 00:31:42,233 She refuses to accept that. 572 00:31:43,401 --> 00:31:44,944 I try to make things easier for her. 573 00:31:45,028 --> 00:31:47,989 Well, maybe in a way you're making things harder. 574 00:31:48,072 --> 00:31:50,700 Perhaps by letting her lean on you, you keep her from standing alone. 575 00:31:52,410 --> 00:31:54,704 So I shouldn't let her lean on me, huh? 576 00:31:54,787 --> 00:31:56,456 My wife of so many years. 577 00:31:56,539 --> 00:31:58,833 The woman I Cherish more than life itself. 578 00:31:58,916 --> 00:32:00,627 Who can't even make it down this passageway by herself. 579 00:32:02,128 --> 00:32:04,213 No thanks, dr.Bricker... 580 00:32:04,297 --> 00:32:06,799 I think Audrey and I can do without your sage advice. 581 00:32:10,887 --> 00:32:12,096 Sir, it's all my fault. 582 00:32:12,180 --> 00:32:13,973 I take full responsibility. 583 00:32:14,057 --> 00:32:16,017 It was the only way I could think of to keep Tony on board. 584 00:32:16,434 --> 00:32:17,393 Oh. 585 00:32:17,477 --> 00:32:19,145 And are you prepared to pay passage for all of them? 586 00:32:19,228 --> 00:32:20,563 Well, sir, I.... 587 00:32:20,647 --> 00:32:24,859 Julie, you know that stowaways have to pay the fare or get off the ship. 588 00:32:24,942 --> 00:32:27,028 Whether the crew invites them or not. 589 00:32:27,111 --> 00:32:28,071 Oh, come on, sir. 590 00:32:28,154 --> 00:32:31,199 You're not gonna put Tony's family off in Ensenada? 591 00:32:37,455 --> 00:32:39,123 The line has rules and I have to follow them. 592 00:32:40,291 --> 00:32:40,708 Officially they are stowaways. 593 00:32:43,294 --> 00:32:45,046 Well then, sir, I'll pay if I have to. 594 00:32:45,129 --> 00:32:47,674 But I just don't have the full fifteen hundred right now, sir. 595 00:32:47,757 --> 00:32:49,384 Figure in crew rates and kids at half fare? 596 00:32:50,510 --> 00:32:51,177 I did. 597 00:32:52,303 --> 00:32:53,179 I was afraid of that. 598 00:32:54,430 --> 00:32:55,390 Well then, we'll all kick in. 599 00:32:55,473 --> 00:32:56,683 Right. 600 00:32:56,766 --> 00:32:57,558 I'll kick in myself. 601 00:32:57,642 --> 00:32:58,393 Now wait. 602 00:32:58,476 --> 00:32:59,185 Now wait. 603 00:33:00,937 --> 00:33:04,315 Nobody pays for Tony santini's family except Tony santini. 604 00:33:06,734 --> 00:33:09,529 Now this cruise is on me. 605 00:33:09,612 --> 00:33:14,867 I may have to put in a little overtime...Like...Ten or twelve years worth... 606 00:33:14,951 --> 00:33:15,576 Tony, don't... 607 00:33:15,660 --> 00:33:15,910 Don't worry. 608 00:33:15,993 --> 00:33:16,536 Don't worry. 609 00:33:17,495 --> 00:33:17,954 Here we are. 610 00:33:18,037 --> 00:33:18,746 Compliments of the ca... 611 00:33:26,671 --> 00:33:30,800 Ladies and gentlemen, chef antonelli welcomes you to the captain's Thanksgiving dinner. 612 00:33:44,731 --> 00:33:46,274 Everything looks wonderful, miss McCoy. 613 00:33:46,357 --> 00:33:47,108 You've done an excellent job. 614 00:33:47,191 --> 00:33:48,234 Thank you, sir. 615 00:33:48,317 --> 00:33:48,943 I'm trying to redeem myself. 616 00:33:50,319 --> 00:33:51,112 Tony, I'm sorry. 617 00:33:51,195 --> 00:33:51,863 Oh, don't be. 618 00:33:52,697 --> 00:33:53,448 It's Thanksgiving. 619 00:33:53,531 --> 00:33:54,240 Let's give thanks. 620 00:33:55,742 --> 00:33:56,659 Reverend Whitney, would you do the honors? 621 00:33:58,035 --> 00:33:59,620 Certainly, captain. 622 00:33:59,704 --> 00:34:03,207 I can't speak for everybody, but I know that we all have something to give thanks for. 623 00:34:04,375 --> 00:34:05,626 So, why don't we just join hands. 624 00:34:07,879 --> 00:34:10,590 There we are...And say what makes us grateful. 625 00:34:10,673 --> 00:34:12,842 As for me I've always preached about love, 626 00:34:12,925 --> 00:34:15,553 and so I'm especially thankful on this day, 627 00:34:15,636 --> 00:34:17,096 that I've found someone with whom I can share it. 628 00:34:21,058 --> 00:34:24,771 I'm thankful that I found such a wonderful man...And such a courageous one, too. 629 00:34:29,275 --> 00:34:34,197 The nerve of him flaunting that woman, and on a day like this. 630 00:34:34,280 --> 00:34:36,949 I as much as told him that he wouldn't have a parish if he kept this up. 631 00:34:38,409 --> 00:34:40,161 You told him what? 632 00:34:41,537 --> 00:34:42,079 You heard me. 633 00:34:42,914 --> 00:34:43,873 And I will see to it, too. 634 00:34:46,375 --> 00:34:48,753 I lost my appetite. 635 00:34:48,836 --> 00:34:52,507 Not just for food, for our marriage. 636 00:34:59,472 --> 00:35:01,724 What I have to say I, 637 00:35:01,808 --> 00:35:05,853 I'll say it in Italian out of respect for my mother and my uncle who speak no English. 638 00:35:05,937 --> 00:35:07,021 Mama... 639 00:35:07,105 --> 00:35:14,070 (Speaks Italian) 640 00:35:21,077 --> 00:35:25,081 Tony says he is thankful to god to have his whole family and, 641 00:35:25,164 --> 00:35:26,916 the people that he loves at the same table. 642 00:35:31,003 --> 00:35:32,630 Angelo, it's your turn. 643 00:35:33,798 --> 00:35:34,674 Tell everybody what you're thankful for. 644 00:35:36,300 --> 00:35:36,968 I can't. 645 00:35:37,969 --> 00:35:38,719 Why? 646 00:35:38,803 --> 00:35:39,512 I'm a bad boy. 647 00:35:41,138 --> 00:35:44,058 Because of me and that chicken my dad owes a lot of money. 648 00:35:44,141 --> 00:35:46,394 Because of that chicken you're gonna get to eat a lot of Turkey. 649 00:35:46,477 --> 00:35:47,812 You like Turkey, don't you? 650 00:35:51,816 --> 00:35:54,443 Angelo is thankful for Turkey. 651 00:35:57,321 --> 00:35:58,030 Audrey? 652 00:36:00,783 --> 00:36:01,617 I have nothing to be thankful for. 653 00:36:04,787 --> 00:36:05,454 Please excuse us. 654 00:36:23,514 --> 00:36:24,682 I'm sorry, Bert, I'm so sorry. 655 00:36:25,474 --> 00:36:26,726 It's all right, honey. 656 00:36:26,809 --> 00:36:28,269 Well, we never should have come on this ship. 657 00:36:28,352 --> 00:36:29,145 It's okay, baby. 658 00:36:29,228 --> 00:36:30,271 It's okay. 659 00:36:30,354 --> 00:36:31,022 Next time I'll know better. 660 00:36:32,106 --> 00:36:32,899 I'll stay home. 661 00:36:32,982 --> 00:36:33,774 What? 662 00:36:33,858 --> 00:36:35,026 For the rest of your life? 663 00:36:35,109 --> 00:36:39,030 Well, what else can I do?....I know my way around the apartment. 664 00:36:40,531 --> 00:36:41,866 And you'll be retired soon and.. 665 00:36:43,034 --> 00:36:44,744 And you'll be there with me. 666 00:36:44,827 --> 00:36:47,079 Audrey, I may not be there some day. 667 00:36:48,080 --> 00:36:48,915 What do you mean? 668 00:36:48,998 --> 00:36:49,957 Well, I can't live forever. 669 00:36:51,709 --> 00:36:52,418 Oh, lord, don't talk like that. 670 00:36:54,337 --> 00:36:55,963 Oh, Bert, Bert, I'm so frightened. 671 00:36:56,047 --> 00:36:59,967 Sweetheart, your life is never gonna be the same. 672 00:37:00,051 --> 00:37:04,138 But it still can be full and rich and rewarding. 673 00:37:04,221 --> 00:37:06,933 But first you're gonna have to learn to accept what's happening to you. 674 00:37:08,184 --> 00:37:11,312 And take your first step as a blind woman. 675 00:37:12,605 --> 00:37:13,314 Bert? 676 00:37:20,696 --> 00:37:21,197 Now here's your cane, baby. 677 00:37:23,741 --> 00:37:25,326 I'm going to the lounge. 678 00:37:25,409 --> 00:37:27,078 It's to the right at the end of the passageway. 679 00:37:28,245 --> 00:37:29,622 I'll meet you there. 680 00:37:31,415 --> 00:37:33,668 Oh, Bert, please...Please don't leave me... 681 00:37:42,510 --> 00:37:43,177 Bert... 682 00:37:50,935 --> 00:37:52,228 Bert...... 683 00:38:21,590 --> 00:38:22,717 Tonight we danced like real people, huh? 684 00:38:23,426 --> 00:38:23,926 I know, Tony. 685 00:38:24,010 --> 00:38:24,927 But how are we gonna pay? 686 00:38:25,970 --> 00:38:26,595 Don't worry. 687 00:38:26,679 --> 00:38:27,555 I'll...I'll work something out. 688 00:38:36,272 --> 00:38:37,273 Papa, here. 689 00:38:37,356 --> 00:38:38,274 It's the dollar that doc gave me. 690 00:38:40,192 --> 00:38:41,861 You could buy a lot of candy with that dollar. 691 00:38:43,154 --> 00:38:43,988 I don't need the candy, you need the dollar. 692 00:38:46,490 --> 00:38:50,036 I don't need anything...Not as long as I have a son like you. 693 00:38:50,119 --> 00:38:56,917 Here...go on...Now don't worry, we'll work out our money problems together. 694 00:38:57,001 --> 00:38:57,918 Now you spend that....Or you save it. 695 00:39:00,463 --> 00:39:02,048 Or maybe you give it to somebody who needs it more than we do. 696 00:39:04,383 --> 00:39:05,092 Come on...(Speaks Italian) 697 00:39:24,695 --> 00:39:27,740 Phil...were you serious? 698 00:39:29,366 --> 00:39:31,744 I'll get an apartment just as soon as we get back. 699 00:39:35,373 --> 00:39:38,793 I should be able to move in inside of a week or two. 700 00:39:38,876 --> 00:39:41,545 Meanwhile, I'll just stay in a hotel. 701 00:39:42,546 --> 00:39:43,214 You are serious. 702 00:39:44,799 --> 00:39:45,466 Uh-huh. 703 00:39:46,717 --> 00:39:47,426 Why? 704 00:39:52,056 --> 00:39:56,477 Somewhere along the line we started thinking differently. 705 00:39:57,770 --> 00:39:58,479 I don't understand. 706 00:40:01,023 --> 00:40:05,653 You've become so...Self-righteous...And narrow. 707 00:40:05,736 --> 00:40:11,158 Sometimes you do things in the name of your church that I don't understand.... 708 00:40:15,204 --> 00:40:18,249 Maybe I'm equally responsible. 709 00:40:18,332 --> 00:40:20,960 Maybe I shouldn't have spent so much time at the track. 710 00:40:23,921 --> 00:40:25,965 But we're all sinners, Barb. 711 00:40:26,048 --> 00:40:28,008 No one is holier than the next. 712 00:40:30,427 --> 00:40:32,012 I was holier. 713 00:40:33,556 --> 00:40:36,308 I made the church a substitute. 714 00:40:36,392 --> 00:40:39,145 I...I've let my marriage go to pot and, 715 00:40:39,228 --> 00:40:41,063 now I...I'm gonna lose you. 716 00:40:45,276 --> 00:40:48,779 Oh, Phil...What would it take to make you stay? 717 00:40:50,281 --> 00:40:53,242 No...no, no, don't...Don't answer that. 718 00:40:56,453 --> 00:40:59,456 I'll go and I'll talk to reverend Whitney right away. 719 00:40:59,540 --> 00:41:00,749 I'll take back every thing I said. 720 00:41:00,833 --> 00:41:05,629 I'll change, Phil.I mean it. 721 00:41:09,300 --> 00:41:10,885 Oh, dear.Phil, let me? 722 00:41:34,158 --> 00:41:38,078 Ah, as long as we're making a clean start. 723 00:41:40,289 --> 00:41:44,710 I might as well get rid of this last silver dollar. 724 00:41:49,673 --> 00:41:50,382 That's it. The last buck. 725 00:41:52,051 --> 00:41:52,593 I'm busted. 726 00:41:53,135 --> 00:41:53,761 Tapped out. 727 00:41:53,844 --> 00:41:54,511 Let's go. 728 00:41:58,057 --> 00:41:58,974 Don't you have any more money? 729 00:41:59,975 --> 00:42:00,643 No. 730 00:42:02,645 --> 00:42:03,437 Then here. 731 00:42:03,520 --> 00:42:04,438 You need this more than I do. 732 00:42:07,650 --> 00:42:08,484 Hey, hey, wait a minute.I don't need this. 733 00:42:09,568 --> 00:42:10,819 I didn't mean that I don't have...Have... 734 00:42:10,903 --> 00:42:11,445 Phil, is that sweet? 735 00:42:13,197 --> 00:42:13,822 He thought you were broke. 736 00:42:15,074 --> 00:42:16,033 It's...that's incredible. 737 00:42:16,116 --> 00:42:18,786 Well, I better find him and give this back to him. 738 00:42:21,872 --> 00:42:25,584 Unless maybe he'd accept payment with a bill instead of a silver dollar. 739 00:43:04,915 --> 00:43:05,624 It's the jackpot, kid. 740 00:43:06,542 --> 00:43:07,668 That machine finally paid off. 741 00:43:08,752 --> 00:43:09,378 That's good. 742 00:43:09,461 --> 00:43:10,879 Then you're not broke any more. 743 00:43:10,963 --> 00:43:11,797 Broke? 744 00:43:11,880 --> 00:43:12,548 I was never broke. 745 00:43:14,633 --> 00:43:15,801 Kid, it was your dollar that won. 746 00:43:16,927 --> 00:43:17,594 This is all yours. 747 00:43:21,265 --> 00:43:21,974 How did it happen? 748 00:43:30,149 --> 00:43:31,400 Pop, the cruise is on me. 749 00:43:31,483 --> 00:43:32,234 Ohhh. 750 00:43:46,957 --> 00:43:50,586 Mr.wyler...I'm sorry if I upset you this afternoon. 751 00:43:50,669 --> 00:43:52,921 Doctor, you're the first one with nerve enough to tell me the truth. 752 00:43:53,630 --> 00:43:55,007 Is mrs.Wyler okay? 753 00:43:55,090 --> 00:43:56,383 I hope so, Isaac. 754 00:43:56,467 --> 00:43:58,010 I just left her in the cabin alone. 755 00:43:58,093 --> 00:43:59,845 I told her I'd meet her here. 756 00:43:59,928 --> 00:44:02,056 It's the hardest thing I've ever done. 757 00:44:04,350 --> 00:44:07,811 Maybe I should go to her. 758 00:44:07,895 --> 00:44:09,229 I don't think you should leave just yet. 759 00:44:14,735 --> 00:44:16,278 Not yet. 760 00:44:16,362 --> 00:44:16,820 Good evening, mrs.Wyler. 761 00:44:18,155 --> 00:44:18,781 You're looking lovely this evening. 762 00:44:20,157 --> 00:44:20,949 Who's that? 763 00:44:21,033 --> 00:44:23,077 It's gopher. 764 00:44:23,160 --> 00:44:26,080 You know if I were your husband, I'd start getting jealous. 765 00:44:26,163 --> 00:44:27,706 You're much too beautiful to be left alone. 766 00:44:27,790 --> 00:44:28,582 Good evening, gopher. 767 00:44:28,665 --> 00:44:29,416 Good evening, captain. 768 00:44:29,500 --> 00:44:30,209 Lovely lady. 769 00:44:31,835 --> 00:44:33,379 Rumor has it that you're a pretty fair dancer. 770 00:44:33,462 --> 00:44:34,463 I see. 771 00:44:34,546 --> 00:44:35,756 There you go...Quotes everywhere. 772 00:44:38,550 --> 00:44:40,719 I may not be John Travolta, but I think I can bumble through. 773 00:44:44,640 --> 00:44:49,478 I don't know...I'm blind, you know. 774 00:44:50,646 --> 00:44:52,439 Well, I'm tone deaf, myself. 775 00:44:52,523 --> 00:44:55,359 But I think between the two of us, we can do a pretty fair fox trot. 776 00:44:56,485 --> 00:44:57,152 This way. 777 00:45:20,050 --> 00:45:20,717 She's a wonderful dancer. 778 00:45:21,718 --> 00:45:22,803 Yeah. 779 00:45:22,886 --> 00:45:24,012 But I can't say much for the captain. 780 00:45:26,557 --> 00:45:28,392 I think she deserves a better partner. 781 00:45:37,067 --> 00:45:38,235 Excuse me, may I cut in? 782 00:45:38,318 --> 00:45:40,654 Well, I think a man should be allowed to dance with his wife. 783 00:45:48,495 --> 00:45:49,163 I love you. 784 00:45:51,081 --> 00:45:52,332 Bert, I was so wrong. 785 00:45:53,083 --> 00:45:53,959 And I'm so ashamed. 786 00:45:54,835 --> 00:45:56,795 I do have something to be grateful for. 787 00:45:58,130 --> 00:45:58,714 You. 788 00:46:24,781 --> 00:46:29,536 All I can say is, if that women's auxiliary or the board even dare to open up their mouths, 789 00:46:29,620 --> 00:46:30,537 they'll have me to answer to. 790 00:46:30,996 --> 00:46:31,997 Thanks, Mrs. Sharpe. 791 00:46:32,080 --> 00:46:33,123 Oh, reverend. 792 00:46:33,207 --> 00:46:33,624 Thank you for understanding. 793 00:46:35,459 --> 00:46:38,045 You know I think the book of Solomon says it best. 794 00:46:38,128 --> 00:46:41,340 They that put their trust in him, shall understand the truth. 795 00:46:41,423 --> 00:46:43,300 And the truth is that you're a very fine woman Barbara. 796 00:46:46,303 --> 00:46:50,641 All I can say is I have learned more on this cruise than I have in a month of sundays.... 797 00:46:51,767 --> 00:46:52,434 Oooh.... 798 00:46:57,981 --> 00:47:00,609 You know, you can knock his sermons now and then, 799 00:47:00,692 --> 00:47:04,613 but...i think it's time I tried a few of them. 800 00:47:04,696 --> 00:47:05,614 At worst, I'll break even. 801 00:47:10,160 --> 00:47:10,827 Bye. 802 00:47:10,911 --> 00:47:11,912 And thank you for sailing with us. 803 00:47:12,788 --> 00:47:15,040 (Goodbyes) 804 00:47:15,123 --> 00:47:18,544 Hey, goodbye and good luck to both of you. 805 00:47:18,627 --> 00:47:20,921 Mr.and mrs.Wyler, it's been a pleasure sailing with you. 806 00:47:21,004 --> 00:47:21,463 It was our pleasure. 807 00:47:22,506 --> 00:47:23,840 Well, what's next for you two? 808 00:47:23,924 --> 00:47:26,677 Well, Audrey's gonna teach youngsters dancing at the braille institute. 809 00:47:27,344 --> 00:47:28,220 Yes. 810 00:47:28,303 --> 00:47:30,514 Just as soon as I learn a few things myself. 811 00:47:30,597 --> 00:47:35,394 Poor, Bert, he's gonna have to get along for a few hours a day without me. 812 00:47:35,477 --> 00:47:36,603 We're gonna make it just fine, doctor. 813 00:47:38,355 --> 00:47:39,439 Mrs. Wyler, good luck to you. 814 00:47:40,691 --> 00:47:41,942 Goodbye and thank you so much. 815 00:47:42,025 --> 00:47:43,360 Bye bye.God bless.... 816 00:47:50,409 --> 00:47:51,118 There you go, Angelo. 817 00:47:54,329 --> 00:47:56,873 Paid in full for six passengers. 818 00:47:59,376 --> 00:48:02,629 Tony, I want to thank you for sharing your family with us. 819 00:48:02,713 --> 00:48:03,922 It was a wonderful Thanksgiving. 820 00:48:04,673 --> 00:48:05,465 Thank me? 821 00:48:05,549 --> 00:48:06,216 Captain, thank you. 822 00:48:07,175 --> 00:48:07,968 Thank you, captian. 823 00:48:08,051 --> 00:48:10,262 (Everybody saying thank you) 824 00:48:10,345 --> 00:48:13,348 (Speaks Italian) 825 00:48:17,686 --> 00:48:18,854 I think he's happy he's not a Turkey.