1 00:00:11,177 --> 00:00:14,887 Love, 2 00:00:14,973 --> 00:00:18,773 exciting and new. 3 00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:22,772 Come aboard, 4 00:00:22,856 --> 00:00:27,276 we're expecting you. 5 00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:30,910 Love, 6 00:00:30,989 --> 00:00:35,079 life's sweetest reward. 7 00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:38,910 Let it flow, 8 00:00:38,997 --> 00:00:43,377 it floats back to you. 9 00:00:43,460 --> 00:00:46,500 Love boat 10 00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:51,588 soon will be making another run. 11 00:00:51,676 --> 00:00:54,596 The love boat 12 00:00:54,679 --> 00:00:59,309 promises something for everyone. 13 00:00:59,392 --> 00:01:01,102 Set a course for adventure, 14 00:01:01,186 --> 00:01:03,146 your mind on a new romance. 15 00:01:03,229 --> 00:01:11,279 And love, 16 00:01:11,362 --> 00:01:15,452 won't hurt anymore, 17 00:01:15,533 --> 00:01:19,293 it's an open smile, 18 00:01:19,370 --> 00:01:23,630 on a friendly shore. 19 00:01:23,708 --> 00:01:28,458 Yes, love 20 00:01:28,546 --> 00:01:29,956 welcome aboard, 21 00:01:30,048 --> 00:01:32,878 it's love. 22 00:02:17,512 --> 00:02:18,432 What's all this stuff? 23 00:02:18,513 --> 00:02:19,893 Well, maybe Sammy Davis is coming 24 00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:23,393 on board, and he sent his jewelry on ahead. 25 00:02:23,476 --> 00:02:24,386 All that stuff belongs to 26 00:02:24,477 --> 00:02:25,727 the new chef. 27 00:02:25,812 --> 00:02:27,442 Well, what happened to the regular chef? 28 00:02:27,522 --> 00:02:29,232 He's in the hospital. 29 00:02:29,315 --> 00:02:30,855 You think it was something he ate? 30 00:02:30,942 --> 00:02:32,402 No, he's got appendicitis. 31 00:02:32,485 --> 00:02:33,435 Oh. 32 00:02:33,528 --> 00:02:34,398 Gee, I hope everything comes out 33 00:02:34,487 --> 00:02:35,907 all right. 34 00:02:44,998 --> 00:02:47,418 Borga! 35 00:02:47,500 --> 00:02:48,460 Borga. 36 00:02:48,543 --> 00:02:51,383 Borga...borga. 37 00:02:51,462 --> 00:02:53,802 Chef borga! 38 00:02:53,882 --> 00:02:56,382 Oh, chef borga; Well, 39 00:02:56,467 --> 00:02:57,427 welcome aboard! 40 00:02:57,510 --> 00:02:59,100 I'm your cruise director, miss 41 00:02:59,178 --> 00:03:00,218 McCoy. 42 00:03:00,305 --> 00:03:04,425 Miss McCoy. 43 00:03:04,517 --> 00:03:06,137 No wonder you're not married. 44 00:03:06,227 --> 00:03:07,437 I beg your pardon? 45 00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:09,110 Too skinny. 46 00:03:09,188 --> 00:03:11,108 Men want women with something to 47 00:03:11,190 --> 00:03:12,480 hold onto. 48 00:03:12,567 --> 00:03:14,187 But, don't worry, 49 00:03:14,277 --> 00:03:16,317 a little fettuccini, 50 00:03:16,404 --> 00:03:16,994 a little ravioli, 51 00:03:17,071 --> 00:03:19,161 a little poke at the Linguini. 52 00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:20,620 We'll have ten pounds on you 53 00:03:20,700 --> 00:03:21,280 by Mazatlan. 54 00:03:21,367 --> 00:03:23,787 Fifteen by puerto vallarta. 55 00:03:23,870 --> 00:03:27,670 By acapulco you could be the anchor. 56 00:03:27,749 --> 00:03:29,329 Well, I'm sure, chef, 57 00:03:29,417 --> 00:03:30,747 that you'll just have a very 58 00:03:30,835 --> 00:03:31,785 pleasant cruise here. 59 00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:32,798 We have a beautiful ship, and a 60 00:03:32,879 --> 00:03:33,919 very cooperative crew. 61 00:03:34,005 --> 00:03:36,755 And a jackass for a captain. 62 00:03:36,841 --> 00:03:38,761 What did you say? 63 00:03:38,843 --> 00:03:39,303 He said we have a jackass... 64 00:03:39,385 --> 00:03:40,925 I heard what he said. 65 00:03:41,012 --> 00:03:41,972 Don't tell me I'm stuck with you 66 00:03:42,055 --> 00:03:43,345 for an entire cruise! 67 00:03:43,431 --> 00:03:44,471 You're stuck?! 68 00:03:44,557 --> 00:03:45,517 Hah! 69 00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:47,520 This peasant put ketchup on my 70 00:03:47,602 --> 00:03:50,522 bouillabaisse! 71 00:03:50,605 --> 00:03:53,105 It didn't help. 72 00:03:53,191 --> 00:03:56,651 You have the taste buds of a goat. 73 00:03:56,736 --> 00:03:58,946 Before we sail, run out 74 00:03:59,030 --> 00:04:00,990 and get me a TV dinner... 75 00:04:01,074 --> 00:04:03,084 Make that plural, TV dinners! 76 00:04:07,121 --> 00:04:14,551 (Yells something in Italian). 77 00:04:14,629 --> 00:04:16,339 What did he say? 78 00:04:16,422 --> 00:04:18,342 Well, I only speak a little Italian, 79 00:04:18,424 --> 00:04:20,094 but I think he said; 'Have a nice day.' 80 00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:31,443 Hi, welcome aboard... 81 00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:32,861 Hello. 82 00:04:32,939 --> 00:04:34,859 Well, look who's here! 83 00:04:34,941 --> 00:04:36,361 If it isn't mr.Travel himself. 84 00:04:36,442 --> 00:04:38,442 Hello, Jeff, how are you? 85 00:04:38,528 --> 00:04:39,528 Hiya, gorgeous. 86 00:04:39,612 --> 00:04:40,532 Oh, thank you. 87 00:04:40,613 --> 00:04:41,203 What's this? 88 00:04:41,281 --> 00:04:42,531 Another free travelling junket? 89 00:04:42,615 --> 00:04:44,825 Just in the line of duty,julie. 90 00:04:44,909 --> 00:04:46,039 Boy, I envy you guys. 91 00:04:46,119 --> 00:04:49,369 Free cruises all the time... 92 00:04:49,455 --> 00:04:51,865 I envy me, too. 93 00:04:51,958 --> 00:04:53,248 It's just a job, gopher. 94 00:04:53,334 --> 00:04:53,924 I'm putting together another 95 00:04:54,002 --> 00:04:55,092 holiday package for one of the 96 00:04:55,169 --> 00:04:56,209 airlines. 97 00:04:56,295 --> 00:04:57,165 Believe me, the thrill wore off 98 00:04:57,255 --> 00:04:58,755 a long time ago. 99 00:04:58,840 --> 00:04:59,920 Well, see you guys. 100 00:05:00,008 --> 00:05:02,838 Bye... 101 00:05:02,927 --> 00:05:04,047 Gee, what's with him? 102 00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:05,757 He used to be such a live wire. 103 00:05:05,847 --> 00:05:06,557 I don't know. 104 00:05:06,639 --> 00:05:08,979 I heard he broke up with his wife. 105 00:05:09,058 --> 00:05:10,768 Hmmmm. 106 00:05:10,852 --> 00:05:12,402 What do you mean, hmmmm? 107 00:05:12,478 --> 00:05:14,858 Just hmmmm. 108 00:05:14,939 --> 00:05:15,399 Well, was it a 'gee, 109 00:05:15,481 --> 00:05:17,111 that's too bad' hmmmm, 110 00:05:17,191 --> 00:05:18,571 or a 'maybe there's hope for me' 111 00:05:18,651 --> 00:05:20,281 hmmmm, hmmm? 112 00:05:20,361 --> 00:05:21,701 Gopher, get lost. 113 00:05:21,779 --> 00:05:22,739 Get lost? 114 00:05:22,822 --> 00:05:27,622 Hmmmm. 115 00:05:27,702 --> 00:05:29,082 Hmmmm. 116 00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:30,912 I wouldn't miss your column, 117 00:05:30,997 --> 00:05:32,037 neither would my sister. 118 00:05:32,123 --> 00:05:33,423 That's right. 119 00:05:33,499 --> 00:05:34,249 First thing we turn to in the 120 00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:36,754 morning newspaper, is 'dear Beverly,' 121 00:05:36,836 --> 00:05:39,456 even before the obituaries. 122 00:05:39,547 --> 00:05:41,587 Oh, that's very nice, 123 00:05:41,674 --> 00:05:42,724 thank you. 124 00:05:42,800 --> 00:05:44,390 And, your afternoon TV show 125 00:05:44,469 --> 00:05:46,259 is wonderful. 126 00:05:46,346 --> 00:05:47,596 Thank you. 127 00:05:47,680 --> 00:05:48,390 Thank you very much. 128 00:05:48,473 --> 00:05:50,393 You know, you're even more 129 00:05:50,475 --> 00:05:51,765 beautiful in person. 130 00:05:51,851 --> 00:05:53,601 That's very kind of you. 131 00:05:53,686 --> 00:05:55,146 Nice to meet you, very nice to 132 00:05:55,229 --> 00:05:55,689 meet you. 133 00:05:55,772 --> 00:05:56,482 Oh, I'm sorry, ladies, 134 00:05:56,564 --> 00:05:57,944 but I really must get mrs.Blanchard 135 00:05:58,024 --> 00:05:58,784 checked into her cabin. 136 00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:01,608 But we have a terrible family problem. 137 00:06:01,694 --> 00:06:03,824 We have an uncle who refuses to 138 00:06:03,905 --> 00:06:05,445 bathe. 139 00:06:05,531 --> 00:06:06,531 Oh. 140 00:06:06,616 --> 00:06:09,406 Is he with you? 141 00:06:09,494 --> 00:06:10,454 No. 142 00:06:10,536 --> 00:06:13,246 Good. 143 00:06:13,331 --> 00:06:14,291 Ladies, mrs.Blanchard will be 144 00:06:14,373 --> 00:06:16,293 glad to answer all your questions 145 00:06:16,375 --> 00:06:19,085 in her lecture on Sunday. 146 00:06:19,170 --> 00:06:20,250 There's a new one, ring 147 00:06:20,338 --> 00:06:21,958 around the family. 148 00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:22,968 Purser... 149 00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:24,429 Sir, I'm sorry, Mrs. Blanchard 150 00:06:24,509 --> 00:06:24,879 has been waiting for 151 00:06:24,967 --> 00:06:25,967 her cabin number. 152 00:06:26,052 --> 00:06:27,642 I'm mr.Blanchard. 153 00:06:27,720 --> 00:06:28,970 Oh. 154 00:06:29,055 --> 00:06:29,965 Oh, gosh, I didn't know there 155 00:06:30,056 --> 00:06:30,926 was a mr.Blanchard. 156 00:06:31,015 --> 00:06:32,305 You're not alone. 157 00:06:32,391 --> 00:06:33,981 Come on, darling... 158 00:06:34,060 --> 00:06:34,520 Oh, well, let, now, 159 00:06:34,602 --> 00:06:35,982 let's see...Okay, cabin 160 00:06:36,062 --> 00:06:37,982 three-forty-two, promenade deck. 161 00:06:38,064 --> 00:06:39,154 Oh, thank you very much. 162 00:06:39,232 --> 00:06:41,482 Thank you. You bet. 163 00:06:41,567 --> 00:06:43,187 Listen, if you need any advice, 164 00:06:43,277 --> 00:06:45,487 i mean, if you have any problems, 165 00:06:45,571 --> 00:06:47,491 have a wonderful cruise. 166 00:06:55,456 --> 00:06:55,996 Can I help you? 167 00:06:56,082 --> 00:06:57,132 I'm Adam bricker, the ship's 168 00:06:57,208 --> 00:06:57,708 doctor. 169 00:06:57,792 --> 00:06:58,842 Oh, thanks, but I'm fine, 170 00:06:58,918 --> 00:07:00,168 we're both fine. 171 00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:01,173 All we need is a place to lay 172 00:07:01,254 --> 00:07:02,214 our heads. 173 00:07:02,296 --> 00:07:03,966 Well, I, I wasn't speaking medically. 174 00:07:04,048 --> 00:07:05,968 But, if you'll give me your name, 175 00:07:06,050 --> 00:07:07,010 I'll give you your cabin number. 176 00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:09,353 Oh, Gail Smith. 177 00:07:09,428 --> 00:07:12,008 Uh, Smith...Gail Smith, 178 00:07:12,098 --> 00:07:13,518 that'll be p-two-oh-six, right 179 00:07:13,599 --> 00:07:14,639 up those stairs. 180 00:07:14,725 --> 00:07:15,805 I hope you and mr.Smith 181 00:07:15,893 --> 00:07:17,193 have a pleasant trip. 182 00:07:17,270 --> 00:07:18,020 Thanks, but there is no 183 00:07:18,104 --> 00:07:20,194 Mr. Smith. 184 00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:21,523 Well, if you get right down to it 185 00:07:21,607 --> 00:07:22,147 there are probably thousands 186 00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:23,193 of mr.Smiths 187 00:07:23,276 --> 00:07:23,686 but there isn't one 188 00:07:23,776 --> 00:07:25,066 traveling with me. 189 00:07:25,153 --> 00:07:26,403 Then I think all those mr.Smiths 190 00:07:26,487 --> 00:07:28,527 are making a big mistake. 191 00:07:28,614 --> 00:07:31,704 Not in the case of my mr.Smith 192 00:07:31,784 --> 00:07:32,704 I'm afraid it was me who made 193 00:07:32,785 --> 00:07:35,035 the mistake. 194 00:08:11,324 --> 00:08:14,584 Darling, it's going to be fun. 195 00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:16,120 We'll have a lovely vacation. 196 00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:18,794 Yeah, sure. 197 00:08:18,873 --> 00:08:19,753 Oh, now, come on. 198 00:08:19,832 --> 00:08:21,752 Don't be so grouchy. 199 00:08:21,834 --> 00:08:23,754 Look at this lovely suite, and 200 00:08:23,836 --> 00:08:24,876 this beautiful ship. 201 00:08:24,962 --> 00:08:26,422 Come on, let's enjoy it. 202 00:08:26,505 --> 00:08:27,915 I'd enjoy it a lot more if 203 00:08:28,007 --> 00:08:28,797 I was paying for it. 204 00:08:28,883 --> 00:08:30,433 I don't enjoy...Freeloading on 205 00:08:30,509 --> 00:08:32,089 my wife's name. 206 00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:33,888 Now, isn't this silly? 207 00:08:33,971 --> 00:08:34,761 Now, why shouldn't we take this 208 00:08:34,847 --> 00:08:36,097 free cruise? 209 00:08:36,182 --> 00:08:37,312 All I have to do is give a 210 00:08:37,391 --> 00:08:38,431 little lecture. 211 00:08:38,517 --> 00:08:40,437 Because I can afford to pay 212 00:08:40,519 --> 00:08:41,479 for a vacation, take you 213 00:08:41,562 --> 00:08:43,022 someplace where we can be alone, 214 00:08:43,105 --> 00:08:44,645 without all these people around, 215 00:08:44,732 --> 00:08:45,072 and you wouldn't have to do 216 00:08:45,149 --> 00:08:46,149 work, either. 217 00:08:46,234 --> 00:08:47,614 Oh, darling, it isn't work 218 00:08:47,693 --> 00:08:48,953 i love it. 219 00:08:49,028 --> 00:08:55,328 And, I love you. 220 00:08:55,409 --> 00:08:55,789 Well, if you love your 221 00:08:55,868 --> 00:08:57,618 work that much... 222 00:08:57,703 --> 00:09:00,463 'Dear Beverly, I have a big 223 00:09:00,539 --> 00:09:02,579 problem I think you can solve. 224 00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:08,297 I would like to make mad...Mad, 225 00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:09,971 passionate love to my wife. 226 00:09:10,049 --> 00:09:11,299 Signed: Panting on the 227 00:09:11,384 --> 00:09:12,434 Princess.' 228 00:09:12,510 --> 00:09:15,350 oh, 'dear panting: I'd love to give 229 00:09:15,429 --> 00:09:18,139 your problem my personal attention 230 00:09:18,224 --> 00:09:19,484 but it's very difficult 231 00:09:19,558 --> 00:09:20,518 to make love 232 00:09:20,601 --> 00:09:23,151 while you are typing.' 233 00:09:23,229 --> 00:09:24,189 what typing? 234 00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:26,232 Oh, darling, I'm sorry. 235 00:09:26,315 --> 00:09:27,475 I'd love you to make passionate 236 00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:29,647 love to me, but I still have to 237 00:09:29,735 --> 00:09:32,025 finish that column. 238 00:09:32,113 --> 00:09:33,163 Oh, boy. 239 00:09:33,239 --> 00:09:34,199 Oh. 240 00:09:34,282 --> 00:09:37,162 Oh, that's great. 241 00:09:37,243 --> 00:09:38,953 Darling, it won't take long. 242 00:09:39,036 --> 00:09:39,996 I promise. 243 00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:41,709 And, don't make it more 244 00:09:41,789 --> 00:09:43,829 difficult for me by looking so sexy. 245 00:09:43,916 --> 00:09:44,826 Oh, ho, ho. 246 00:09:44,917 --> 00:09:45,497 I'll tell you what. 247 00:09:45,584 --> 00:09:46,634 Why don't you go up on deck, and 248 00:09:46,711 --> 00:09:48,671 I'll be there in a moment. 249 00:09:48,754 --> 00:09:50,344 Oh, please, darling, don't make 250 00:09:50,423 --> 00:09:53,343 me feel guilty. 251 00:09:53,426 --> 00:09:56,046 Well, it's either a shower 252 00:09:56,137 --> 00:09:58,847 or walk. 253 00:09:58,931 --> 00:10:00,891 I'll walk. 254 00:10:05,938 --> 00:10:09,978 Oh, dear... 255 00:10:10,067 --> 00:10:12,237 "Dear Beverly: My son is a two 256 00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:13,990 hundred fifty pound fullback on 257 00:10:14,071 --> 00:10:15,661 his college football team, but 258 00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:17,990 the other day when I came home, 259 00:10:18,075 --> 00:10:20,325 I found him wearing one of my 260 00:10:20,411 --> 00:10:21,371 dresses. 261 00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:24,714 What shall I do?" 262 00:10:24,790 --> 00:10:27,750 "Go on a diet". 263 00:10:58,783 --> 00:11:01,743 Oh, thank you, Lance... 264 00:11:12,171 --> 00:11:13,711 May I have the ketchup, please. 265 00:11:44,036 --> 00:11:45,446 I'm certainly glad you 266 00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:45,958 finished that column. 267 00:11:46,038 --> 00:11:48,118 Oh, So am I, darling. 268 00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:50,837 I'm all yours now... 269 00:11:50,918 --> 00:11:52,838 Oh, excuse me, are you waiting 270 00:11:52,920 --> 00:11:53,630 to be seated? 271 00:11:53,712 --> 00:11:55,462 Yes, they had us at a table for two, 272 00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:57,298 but we wanted a larger table, 273 00:11:57,383 --> 00:12:00,343 so we could meet more people. 274 00:12:00,428 --> 00:12:01,758 Aren't you dear Beverly? 275 00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:04,006 Oh, I, I'm sorry. 276 00:12:04,098 --> 00:12:04,968 Don't worry about it. 277 00:12:05,057 --> 00:12:06,477 It happens all the time. 278 00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:08,439 Yes, I'm Beverly Blanchard, and 279 00:12:08,519 --> 00:12:10,149 this is my husband, Russ. 280 00:12:10,229 --> 00:12:11,809 And, you know, I really 281 00:12:11,897 --> 00:12:12,937 understand your problem. 282 00:12:13,023 --> 00:12:14,943 It's very important to meet new 283 00:12:15,025 --> 00:12:16,275 people, and sometimes it's 284 00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:17,320 terribly difficult. 285 00:12:17,403 --> 00:12:18,993 Well, if dear Beverly can't help us, 286 00:12:19,071 --> 00:12:22,781 nobody can. 287 00:12:22,867 --> 00:12:24,197 Darling, I know this was going 288 00:12:24,285 --> 00:12:26,195 to be our evening,but, 289 00:12:26,287 --> 00:12:27,997 they are such nice people. 290 00:12:28,080 --> 00:12:31,830 Do you mind? 291 00:12:31,917 --> 00:12:34,207 Sure. 292 00:12:34,295 --> 00:12:35,495 Then it's all settled. 293 00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:39,088 We are your first new people. 294 00:12:39,175 --> 00:12:41,005 Good. 295 00:12:51,270 --> 00:12:53,190 Now, that's a nice couple. 296 00:12:53,272 --> 00:12:53,982 So, when are you getting 297 00:12:54,064 --> 00:12:55,904 your divorce? 298 00:12:55,983 --> 00:12:59,153 Bum! 299 00:12:59,236 --> 00:12:59,696 You think they're trying 300 00:12:59,778 --> 00:13:04,028 to tell us something? 301 00:13:04,116 --> 00:13:05,366 P.A.:"The late sitting of dinner 302 00:13:05,451 --> 00:13:07,041 is now being served in the coral 303 00:13:07,119 --> 00:13:08,159 dining room. 304 00:13:08,245 --> 00:13:09,825 Bon appetito. 305 00:13:09,914 --> 00:13:11,544 You ready for dinner? 306 00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:13,544 Well, rather hang out in 307 00:13:13,626 --> 00:13:17,376 the moonlight with you. 308 00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:18,263 Jeff, we've known each 309 00:13:18,339 --> 00:13:19,879 other a long time. 310 00:13:19,965 --> 00:13:23,295 How come all of a sudden...? 311 00:13:23,385 --> 00:13:26,215 Well, I guess I've been 312 00:13:26,305 --> 00:13:28,265 too busy messing up my life. 313 00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:30,269 First I loused up my marriage, 314 00:13:30,351 --> 00:13:31,101 and, then I was living with 315 00:13:31,185 --> 00:13:34,805 someone for a while, that didn't work. 316 00:13:34,897 --> 00:13:37,357 Maybe this time I'll get lucky. 317 00:13:49,453 --> 00:13:51,373 What is it, Jeff? 318 00:13:51,455 --> 00:13:53,415 Why do I feel like your heart 319 00:13:53,499 --> 00:13:55,459 isn't in this? 320 00:13:55,543 --> 00:13:58,503 What are you talking about? 321 00:13:58,587 --> 00:13:59,917 You're, you're a fantastic girl, 322 00:14:00,005 --> 00:14:01,255 I've always thought you were 323 00:14:01,340 --> 00:14:04,890 beautiful, and sensitive. 324 00:14:04,969 --> 00:14:07,049 I think you're great. 325 00:14:10,307 --> 00:14:11,597 This isn't gonna work, is it? 326 00:14:11,684 --> 00:14:12,984 Nope. 327 00:14:15,980 --> 00:14:17,060 Is it your wife? 328 00:14:17,147 --> 00:14:20,647 Yep. 329 00:14:20,734 --> 00:14:22,614 Still hung up on Gail. 330 00:14:30,202 --> 00:14:30,952 Evening, doc. 331 00:14:31,036 --> 00:14:31,746 Hello. 332 00:14:31,829 --> 00:14:32,329 Hi. 333 00:14:32,413 --> 00:14:32,963 Gail, I'd like you to meet 334 00:14:33,038 --> 00:14:34,418 gopher Smith, our assistant 335 00:14:34,498 --> 00:14:35,078 purser. 336 00:14:35,165 --> 00:14:35,745 Hi. 337 00:14:35,833 --> 00:14:36,383 Hey, how about that. 338 00:14:36,458 --> 00:14:37,998 You both have the same name. 339 00:14:38,085 --> 00:14:39,295 Gee, I've been called many things, 340 00:14:39,378 --> 00:14:41,298 but never Gail. 341 00:14:41,380 --> 00:14:42,760 I've been called many things 342 00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:44,340 but never gopher. 343 00:14:44,425 --> 00:14:44,925 All right, you both have 344 00:14:45,009 --> 00:14:45,679 the same sense of humor, 345 00:14:45,759 --> 00:14:46,259 terrible. 346 00:14:46,343 --> 00:14:47,513 Hey, look out, doc, lot 347 00:14:47,595 --> 00:14:48,505 more smiths in the world than 348 00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:49,636 brickers, you know. 349 00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:52,102 And, our numbers are increasing. 350 00:14:52,182 --> 00:14:54,142 Congratulations... 351 00:14:54,226 --> 00:14:55,136 May I join you? 352 00:14:55,227 --> 00:14:55,477 Please do. 353 00:14:55,561 --> 00:14:56,151 Of course. 354 00:14:56,228 --> 00:14:57,188 Thank you. 355 00:14:57,271 --> 00:14:59,111 So...what are you gonna call the 356 00:14:59,189 --> 00:14:59,569 baby? 357 00:14:59,648 --> 00:15:00,688 Oh, I don't know. 358 00:15:00,774 --> 00:15:01,654 I like the old-fashioned names, 359 00:15:01,734 --> 00:15:02,694 like Johnny. 360 00:15:02,776 --> 00:15:04,186 As in Walker. 361 00:15:04,278 --> 00:15:05,278 Or Jack. 362 00:15:05,362 --> 00:15:06,662 As in Daniels. 363 00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:08,119 How about Jim? 364 00:15:08,198 --> 00:15:09,738 As in beam! 365 00:15:09,825 --> 00:15:12,155 Nobody'd ever guess he's a bartender. 366 00:15:12,244 --> 00:15:13,334 Gail Smith, Isaac Washington. 367 00:15:13,412 --> 00:15:14,332 How do you do? 368 00:15:14,413 --> 00:15:15,293 Hi. 369 00:15:15,372 --> 00:15:16,922 Listen, how about the name, 370 00:15:16,999 --> 00:15:18,999 cleofus? 371 00:15:19,084 --> 00:15:21,134 Now, that's a nice name. 372 00:15:21,211 --> 00:15:22,171 Um hm. 373 00:15:22,254 --> 00:15:25,304 Henry? 374 00:15:25,382 --> 00:15:26,682 I got it. 375 00:15:26,759 --> 00:15:29,139 How about Jeff? 376 00:15:29,219 --> 00:15:31,309 Jeff Smith? 377 00:15:31,388 --> 00:15:32,308 I like it. 378 00:15:36,560 --> 00:15:38,190 Would you excuse me. 379 00:15:38,270 --> 00:15:39,360 Gail? 380 00:15:39,438 --> 00:15:42,518 Wait a minute... 381 00:15:42,608 --> 00:15:45,318 Gee, wish I'd said Harvey. 382 00:15:45,402 --> 00:15:48,032 As in walbanger. 383 00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:04,592 Can I help? 384 00:16:04,672 --> 00:16:05,712 Oh, doc... 385 00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:10,388 Hey, hey, it's okay. 386 00:16:10,469 --> 00:16:11,509 I'm sorry. 387 00:16:11,595 --> 00:16:12,885 Being around me is like not 388 00:16:12,971 --> 00:16:14,681 having to take a shower. 389 00:16:14,765 --> 00:16:15,715 It's okay. 390 00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:18,478 I'll save on soap. 391 00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:20,060 What happened in there? 392 00:16:20,145 --> 00:16:23,225 Well...jeff Smith is my 393 00:16:23,315 --> 00:16:25,895 husband's name. 394 00:16:25,984 --> 00:16:27,364 Except, in two weeks from now, 395 00:16:27,444 --> 00:16:28,744 he'll be my ex-husband. 396 00:16:28,821 --> 00:16:29,741 Now, I thought that would make 397 00:16:29,822 --> 00:16:31,742 me very happy, but, a funny 398 00:16:31,824 --> 00:16:33,204 thing happened on the way to the 399 00:16:33,283 --> 00:16:34,543 divorce... 400 00:16:34,618 --> 00:16:36,038 Found out I'm still in love with 401 00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:37,370 him. 402 00:16:37,454 --> 00:16:39,084 How does a man divorce the lady 403 00:16:39,164 --> 00:16:40,834 who's carrying his child? 404 00:16:40,916 --> 00:16:42,916 He doesn't know about it. 405 00:16:43,001 --> 00:16:43,591 You see, he walked out on me 406 00:16:43,669 --> 00:16:45,209 before I found out, and i'm, i'm 407 00:16:45,295 --> 00:16:46,415 not gonna use the baby to try 408 00:16:46,505 --> 00:16:47,795 and get him back. 409 00:16:47,881 --> 00:16:49,931 But, surely, he has the right to know. 410 00:16:50,008 --> 00:16:52,048 Well, I tried to reach him. 411 00:16:52,136 --> 00:16:53,466 I was gonna sort of sound him out, 412 00:16:53,554 --> 00:16:56,434 and see if we, 413 00:16:56,515 --> 00:16:57,465 but a woman answered. 414 00:16:57,558 --> 00:17:01,098 He's living with somebody else. 415 00:17:01,186 --> 00:17:01,766 Here. 416 00:17:01,854 --> 00:17:02,814 Try this one. 417 00:17:02,896 --> 00:17:03,976 It's dry. 418 00:17:04,064 --> 00:17:05,484 Oh, doc. 419 00:17:25,210 --> 00:17:28,420 Darling, I'm sorry I neglected you 420 00:17:28,505 --> 00:17:29,585 but I thought I'd sneak 421 00:17:29,673 --> 00:17:31,763 in a couple of hours on my book. 422 00:17:31,842 --> 00:17:32,302 Your book? 423 00:17:32,384 --> 00:17:32,974 Uh huh. 424 00:17:33,051 --> 00:17:35,181 First the column, now a book? 425 00:17:35,262 --> 00:17:35,972 What am I doing here? 426 00:17:36,054 --> 00:17:37,644 You could have brought my picture? 427 00:17:37,723 --> 00:17:40,643 Oh, Russ, don't spoil things. 428 00:17:40,726 --> 00:17:42,266 Do you have any idea how long 429 00:17:42,352 --> 00:17:43,312 it's been since we've been away 430 00:17:43,395 --> 00:17:44,645 on a holiday? 431 00:17:44,730 --> 00:17:46,690 Yeah, I was seven, you were four. 432 00:17:46,774 --> 00:17:49,654 Oh, I didn't know it was that recent. 433 00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:51,985 Oh, darling, I do love to be 434 00:17:52,070 --> 00:17:52,860 away with you. 435 00:17:52,946 --> 00:17:55,486 Well, I like hanging out with you, too. 436 00:17:55,574 --> 00:17:57,494 Listen, why don't we start the 437 00:17:57,576 --> 00:17:58,866 cocktail hour early today. 438 00:17:58,952 --> 00:18:00,912 Are you trying to take 439 00:18:00,996 --> 00:18:02,536 advantage of a poor, defenseless 440 00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:04,373 woman? 441 00:18:04,458 --> 00:18:05,538 Exactly. 442 00:18:05,626 --> 00:18:08,296 Good. 443 00:18:08,378 --> 00:18:12,548 I'll be a minute. 444 00:18:12,633 --> 00:18:13,843 Then she said yes, and I 445 00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:14,966 oh, sure. 446 00:18:15,052 --> 00:18:15,842 Two rum Collins, please. 447 00:18:15,928 --> 00:18:17,138 You got it, sir. 448 00:18:17,221 --> 00:18:18,181 Excuse me. 449 00:18:18,263 --> 00:18:20,313 Is that your wife over there? 450 00:18:20,390 --> 00:18:21,140 The dear Beverly? 451 00:18:21,225 --> 00:18:22,175 Yeah. 452 00:18:22,267 --> 00:18:23,807 Oh, yeah? 453 00:18:23,894 --> 00:18:25,404 Hey, man, she is really 454 00:18:25,479 --> 00:18:26,769 something else. 455 00:18:26,855 --> 00:18:28,565 She always has the right answer. 456 00:18:28,649 --> 00:18:29,899 That's right. 457 00:18:29,983 --> 00:18:32,573 And she just gave me the right answer. 458 00:18:32,653 --> 00:18:36,913 That's way I'm taking a drink to her. 459 00:18:36,990 --> 00:18:38,450 Hey, how about that,man? 460 00:18:38,534 --> 00:18:39,744 Guy left you a three dollar tip 461 00:18:39,827 --> 00:18:44,367 and forgot to pay for the drinks. 462 00:18:44,456 --> 00:18:45,866 When a mother-in-law comes to visit, 463 00:18:45,958 --> 00:18:47,538 how long should she stay? 464 00:18:47,626 --> 00:18:49,546 Well, it depends whether you're 465 00:18:49,628 --> 00:18:53,048 home or not. 466 00:18:53,131 --> 00:18:53,341 Your drink, 467 00:18:53,423 --> 00:18:54,223 darling? 468 00:18:54,299 --> 00:18:55,929 In a moment, love. 469 00:18:56,009 --> 00:18:57,219 But, why do we always pick on 470 00:18:57,302 --> 00:18:58,352 mother-in-laws? 471 00:18:58,428 --> 00:19:00,008 Why don't we pick on father-in-laws, 472 00:19:00,097 --> 00:19:01,347 or for that matter, 473 00:19:01,431 --> 00:19:04,391 why don't we pick on ourselves? 474 00:19:04,476 --> 00:19:06,976 After all, none of us are perfect. 475 00:19:07,062 --> 00:19:09,152 Well, almost none of us. 476 00:19:19,491 --> 00:19:21,241 You have a very popular wife. 477 00:19:21,326 --> 00:19:22,406 Oh... 478 00:19:25,664 --> 00:19:26,924 Hey, how would you like the 479 00:19:26,999 --> 00:19:28,579 specialty of the house? 480 00:19:28,667 --> 00:19:30,037 Supervised and given the careful 481 00:19:30,127 --> 00:19:31,707 attention of Russ Blanchard himself. 482 00:19:31,795 --> 00:19:33,255 Well, you just made me an offer, 483 00:19:33,338 --> 00:19:34,718 I can't refuse. 484 00:19:34,798 --> 00:19:36,298 Good. 485 00:19:41,638 --> 00:19:45,138 Now, that's a nice couple. 486 00:19:45,225 --> 00:19:46,975 That's dear Beverly's husband. 487 00:20:17,007 --> 00:20:18,627 What are you doing? 488 00:20:18,717 --> 00:20:20,297 You like ketchup? 489 00:20:20,385 --> 00:20:21,345 Swim for it. 490 00:20:21,428 --> 00:20:22,798 Get back to the kitchen, 491 00:20:22,888 --> 00:20:23,638 and take this ketchup with you. 492 00:20:23,722 --> 00:20:25,472 I'd rather die. 493 00:20:25,557 --> 00:20:28,187 Don't tempt me. 494 00:20:28,268 --> 00:20:29,188 I don't understand. 495 00:20:29,269 --> 00:20:30,599 I've never had problems like 496 00:20:30,687 --> 00:20:32,147 this with any other chef. 497 00:20:32,230 --> 00:20:33,610 I'm not any other chef. 498 00:20:33,690 --> 00:20:36,190 I am numero uno... 499 00:20:36,276 --> 00:20:37,526 It's not easy creating 500 00:20:37,611 --> 00:20:38,861 masterpieces for six hundred 501 00:20:38,946 --> 00:20:39,986 people. 502 00:20:40,072 --> 00:20:42,032 How would you know? 503 00:20:42,115 --> 00:20:43,655 Look who's talking. 504 00:20:43,742 --> 00:20:44,792 Christopher Columbus! 505 00:20:44,868 --> 00:20:46,868 He aims his ship to Mexico, and 506 00:20:46,954 --> 00:20:49,504 then he goes dancing for a week. 507 00:20:49,581 --> 00:20:51,501 Commanding a ship is a tad more 508 00:20:51,583 --> 00:20:53,673 complicated than scrambling eggs. 509 00:20:53,752 --> 00:20:55,672 Scrambling eggs, hah? 510 00:20:55,754 --> 00:20:57,174 You happen to be talking to a 511 00:20:57,255 --> 00:20:58,665 man who performs miracles with 512 00:20:58,757 --> 00:20:59,967 eggs! 513 00:21:00,050 --> 00:21:03,470 Mostly, you lay them. 514 00:21:03,553 --> 00:21:05,973 (Yells in Italian). 515 00:21:13,939 --> 00:21:16,069 Italian semaphore. 516 00:21:27,285 --> 00:21:28,695 Alvin, 517 00:21:28,787 --> 00:21:30,457 take this below deck, please. 518 00:21:50,642 --> 00:21:52,642 Two bars and a lemon. 519 00:21:52,728 --> 00:21:53,648 It's the story of my life. 520 00:21:53,729 --> 00:21:56,019 I was born to lose. 521 00:21:56,106 --> 00:21:58,026 Jeff, why are you putting 522 00:21:58,108 --> 00:21:59,398 yourself through all this? 523 00:21:59,484 --> 00:22:00,904 If you love your wife so much, 524 00:22:00,986 --> 00:22:02,196 why don't you try to get back 525 00:22:02,279 --> 00:22:04,569 together with her? 526 00:22:04,656 --> 00:22:06,196 I blew it, Julie. 527 00:22:06,283 --> 00:22:07,833 I burned my Bridges. 528 00:22:07,909 --> 00:22:08,739 I walked out the door, and I 529 00:22:08,827 --> 00:22:09,697 moved in with somebody else. 530 00:22:09,786 --> 00:22:10,446 I know Gail. 531 00:22:10,537 --> 00:22:12,407 She'll never forgive me for that. 532 00:22:12,497 --> 00:22:13,327 Well, how are you gonna know 533 00:22:13,415 --> 00:22:14,285 that for sure if you don't 534 00:22:14,374 --> 00:22:15,634 get in touch with her? 535 00:22:15,709 --> 00:22:16,749 I'm not. 536 00:22:16,835 --> 00:22:18,495 Aren't you gonna try? 537 00:22:18,587 --> 00:22:22,587 Nope. 538 00:22:22,674 --> 00:22:23,474 Well, you're sure trying 539 00:22:23,550 --> 00:22:24,550 with that machine. 540 00:22:24,634 --> 00:22:25,894 Yeah. 541 00:22:25,969 --> 00:22:35,939 And it keeps coming up lemons,too. 542 00:22:36,021 --> 00:22:36,771 Do you have a quarter? 543 00:22:36,855 --> 00:22:37,605 I want to play the machine. 544 00:22:37,689 --> 00:22:39,609 Oh, sure. 545 00:22:39,691 --> 00:22:40,731 There you go. 546 00:22:40,817 --> 00:22:42,277 Split the winnings? 547 00:22:42,360 --> 00:22:43,570 Of course. 548 00:22:50,660 --> 00:22:51,120 I won! 549 00:22:51,203 --> 00:22:52,413 Look at that! 550 00:22:52,496 --> 00:22:56,286 It's incredible! 551 00:22:56,375 --> 00:22:57,915 Gail, I thought we were gonna 552 00:22:58,001 --> 00:22:58,461 split the winnings. 553 00:22:58,543 --> 00:23:00,633 Oh, yeah. 554 00:23:00,712 --> 00:23:12,682 Here's your quarter. 555 00:23:12,766 --> 00:23:13,726 Well, you really get 556 00:23:13,809 --> 00:23:14,809 unbelievable letters. 557 00:23:14,893 --> 00:23:17,603 Oh, they usually are from normal, 558 00:23:17,687 --> 00:23:18,937 everyday people, 559 00:23:19,022 --> 00:23:20,652 you know, with real problems. 560 00:23:20,732 --> 00:23:21,822 There are some exceptions. 561 00:23:21,900 --> 00:23:23,820 Like, this woman wrote that her 562 00:23:23,902 --> 00:23:25,782 husband's secretary only wears a 563 00:23:25,862 --> 00:23:27,782 bra and little panties to the 564 00:23:27,864 --> 00:23:29,784 office, like that he saves money 565 00:23:29,866 --> 00:23:31,946 on the air conditioning. 566 00:23:34,037 --> 00:23:35,657 And what did you advise her? 567 00:23:35,747 --> 00:23:36,407 Well, I told her to tell her 568 00:23:36,498 --> 00:23:40,458 husband to cool it in the office. 569 00:23:40,544 --> 00:23:41,714 Sorry to be late. 570 00:23:41,795 --> 00:23:43,165 Tell me more. 571 00:23:43,255 --> 00:23:44,335 Well, as the man said, 572 00:23:44,423 --> 00:23:47,013 I got millions of them. 573 00:23:47,092 --> 00:23:48,392 We meet again. 574 00:23:48,468 --> 00:23:50,048 This forty year old spinster 575 00:23:50,137 --> 00:23:51,807 read a book, titled 576 00:23:51,888 --> 00:23:53,468 'sex after seventy', and she 577 00:23:53,557 --> 00:23:55,517 wanted to know if she has to 578 00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:58,810 wait until then! 579 00:23:58,895 --> 00:24:00,185 Oh, that's marvelous! 580 00:24:00,272 --> 00:24:02,982 Marvelous! 581 00:24:03,066 --> 00:24:03,976 Well, what would you like to 582 00:24:04,067 --> 00:24:06,357 have for dinner? 583 00:24:06,444 --> 00:24:08,074 Well, let me see. 584 00:24:08,155 --> 00:24:10,405 I think I'll have a steak, very 585 00:24:10,490 --> 00:24:11,530 rare, please. 586 00:24:11,616 --> 00:24:13,866 Oh, and a salad. 587 00:24:13,952 --> 00:24:16,542 Oh, dear, my favorite is 588 00:24:16,621 --> 00:24:18,211 chocolate soufflé, but it isn't 589 00:24:18,290 --> 00:24:19,710 on the menu. 590 00:24:19,791 --> 00:24:21,841 Chocolate soufflé? 591 00:24:21,918 --> 00:24:23,548 Your wish is my command... 592 00:24:23,628 --> 00:24:24,668 Gopher... 593 00:24:24,754 --> 00:24:25,714 Come here, please. 594 00:24:25,797 --> 00:24:26,757 Would you please tell the chef, 595 00:24:26,840 --> 00:24:28,430 the captain requests a chocolate 596 00:24:28,508 --> 00:24:29,548 soufflé for dessert. 597 00:24:29,634 --> 00:24:29,894 Yes, sir. 598 00:24:29,968 --> 00:24:30,758 Oh, captain. 599 00:24:30,844 --> 00:24:32,224 I am most impressed. 600 00:24:32,304 --> 00:24:33,564 It was nothing. 601 00:24:33,638 --> 00:24:35,558 Oh, but it is. 602 00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:38,060 You're a born leader. 603 00:24:38,143 --> 00:24:38,773 Well... 604 00:24:38,852 --> 00:24:39,562 Oh, come on, captain, 605 00:24:39,644 --> 00:24:40,904 admit it. 606 00:24:40,979 --> 00:24:42,189 You are the kind of a man who 607 00:24:42,272 --> 00:24:43,772 gets what he wants. 608 00:24:43,857 --> 00:24:50,857 Someone has to be boss. 609 00:24:50,947 --> 00:24:55,577 Chef borga says no way. 610 00:24:55,660 --> 00:24:57,200 There, there has been some 611 00:24:57,287 --> 00:24:58,247 misunderstanding. 612 00:24:58,330 --> 00:24:59,540 No, I don't think so,sir. 613 00:24:59,623 --> 00:25:00,253 He used a lot of colorful 614 00:25:00,332 --> 00:25:02,382 Italian adjectives and gestures. 615 00:25:02,459 --> 00:25:03,749 Are you familiar with... 616 00:25:03,835 --> 00:25:05,455 Please excuse me. 617 00:25:05,545 --> 00:25:06,625 Excuse me. 618 00:25:06,713 --> 00:25:07,463 Excuse me. 619 00:25:07,547 --> 00:25:11,257 Excuse me. 620 00:25:21,353 --> 00:25:21,603 Out! 621 00:25:21,686 --> 00:25:22,266 Out! 622 00:25:22,354 --> 00:25:23,234 Out of my kitchen. 623 00:25:23,313 --> 00:25:25,233 Your kitchen is part of my ship, 624 00:25:25,315 --> 00:25:26,895 and I am requesting a 625 00:25:26,983 --> 00:25:28,943 chocolate soufflé for dessert. 626 00:25:29,027 --> 00:25:30,607 Borga: You want requests, go 627 00:25:30,695 --> 00:25:33,945 talk to the bandleader. 628 00:25:34,032 --> 00:25:34,782 I don't have to take this from 629 00:25:34,866 --> 00:25:38,826 a short order cook. 630 00:25:38,912 --> 00:25:41,462 Short order cook? 631 00:25:41,539 --> 00:25:42,579 Borga? 632 00:25:42,666 --> 00:25:43,956 I demand an apology! 633 00:25:44,042 --> 00:25:45,042 Never! 634 00:25:45,126 --> 00:25:46,626 If I don't have an apology 635 00:25:46,711 --> 00:25:48,461 in writing in my hand by tomorrow, 636 00:25:48,546 --> 00:25:49,666 this is the last dinner 637 00:25:49,756 --> 00:25:50,966 I cook on this ship. 638 00:25:51,049 --> 00:25:53,719 You call this dinner? 639 00:25:53,802 --> 00:25:54,432 Out! 640 00:25:54,511 --> 00:25:55,851 Or I make mince meat out of you. 641 00:25:55,929 --> 00:26:05,109 Where would you steal the recipe? 642 00:26:05,188 --> 00:26:06,978 If I told you once, I told you 643 00:26:07,065 --> 00:26:07,975 a thousand times, 644 00:26:08,066 --> 00:26:09,646 one tomato on each plate! 645 00:26:09,734 --> 00:26:12,494 What's the matter with you! 646 00:26:12,570 --> 00:26:13,950 My apologies, but the chef 647 00:26:14,030 --> 00:26:15,950 ran out of chocolate. 648 00:26:16,032 --> 00:26:18,492 Oh, well, that's perfectly all right 649 00:26:18,576 --> 00:26:20,446 i really don't need the extra calories, 650 00:26:20,537 --> 00:26:21,657 and Russ doesn't like. 651 00:26:21,746 --> 00:26:23,616 Russ? 652 00:26:23,707 --> 00:26:26,167 He left. 653 00:26:26,251 --> 00:26:27,291 He did? 654 00:26:27,377 --> 00:26:28,627 You even said goodbye to him. 655 00:26:28,712 --> 00:26:29,382 Don't you remember? 656 00:26:29,462 --> 00:26:30,512 No. 657 00:26:30,588 --> 00:26:32,508 You know, when I start talking 658 00:26:32,590 --> 00:26:34,510 about my work, I'm in another 659 00:26:34,592 --> 00:26:35,592 planet. 660 00:26:35,677 --> 00:26:37,547 Like the other night in new York, 661 00:26:37,637 --> 00:26:39,007 I was signing autographs 662 00:26:39,097 --> 00:26:41,137 after my TV show, and my mother 663 00:26:41,224 --> 00:26:42,564 came backstage, and I wrote, 664 00:26:42,642 --> 00:26:46,352 happiness always to, then I asked her 665 00:26:46,438 --> 00:26:49,858 how do you spell your name? 666 00:26:49,941 --> 00:26:50,861 (Sings) Ain't 667 00:26:50,942 --> 00:26:55,162 misbehavin' all by myself... 668 00:27:05,582 --> 00:27:09,712 Your cheatin' heart will tell on 669 00:27:09,794 --> 00:27:10,964 you... 670 00:27:27,645 --> 00:27:29,475 Now, how about a lectern, 671 00:27:29,564 --> 00:27:30,734 you know, for your notes? 672 00:27:30,815 --> 00:27:32,105 Oh, I never use notes. 673 00:27:32,192 --> 00:27:34,112 It's a crutch. 674 00:27:34,194 --> 00:27:35,244 Right. 675 00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:36,280 Well, listen, mrs.Blanchard, 676 00:27:36,363 --> 00:27:36,743 you just leave 677 00:27:36,821 --> 00:27:37,451 everything to me. 678 00:27:37,530 --> 00:27:37,910 I'll have it all set up for you 679 00:27:37,989 --> 00:27:39,319 by this afternoon. 680 00:27:39,407 --> 00:27:40,237 Oh, thank you. 681 00:27:40,325 --> 00:27:41,405 Thank you very much. 682 00:27:41,493 --> 00:27:45,543 You bet. 683 00:27:45,622 --> 00:27:46,372 That was dear Beverly you 684 00:27:46,456 --> 00:27:47,416 were talking to. 685 00:27:47,499 --> 00:27:48,539 Yeah. 686 00:27:48,625 --> 00:27:51,205 I really like her. 687 00:27:51,294 --> 00:27:52,554 Stick around. 688 00:27:52,629 --> 00:27:54,089 She may be available soon. 689 00:27:54,172 --> 00:27:54,922 Oh, what's that supposed 690 00:27:55,006 --> 00:27:56,046 to mean? 691 00:27:56,132 --> 00:28:00,642 Last night, when I was on deck, 692 00:28:00,720 --> 00:28:02,640 I saw her husband, giving 693 00:28:02,722 --> 00:28:04,102 kissing lessons to one of our 694 00:28:04,182 --> 00:28:05,432 lady passengers. 695 00:28:05,517 --> 00:28:06,267 You're kidding. 696 00:28:06,351 --> 00:28:08,941 Um ummm. 697 00:28:09,020 --> 00:28:12,150 And he's a good teacher! 698 00:28:12,232 --> 00:28:13,942 What a rotten creep. 699 00:28:14,025 --> 00:28:15,275 Now, wait a minute. 700 00:28:15,360 --> 00:28:16,440 Wait a minute, gopher, it's her 701 00:28:16,528 --> 00:28:17,778 own fault. 702 00:28:17,862 --> 00:28:18,822 I mean, she's been so busy with 703 00:28:18,905 --> 00:28:20,405 everybody else, she's been 704 00:28:20,490 --> 00:28:22,450 leaving him out in the cold. 705 00:28:22,534 --> 00:28:23,954 Oh, gee, that's a shame. 706 00:28:24,035 --> 00:28:25,115 Maybe I ought to tell her. 707 00:28:25,203 --> 00:28:26,453 Butt out! 708 00:28:26,538 --> 00:28:27,248 I mean, it's none of your 709 00:28:27,330 --> 00:28:28,580 business. 710 00:28:28,665 --> 00:28:29,285 Yeah, but if I don't tell her, 711 00:28:29,374 --> 00:28:32,634 her marriage may go on the rocks. 712 00:28:32,710 --> 00:28:33,630 But, if I do tell her, her 713 00:28:33,711 --> 00:28:34,841 marriage may go on the rocks. 714 00:28:34,921 --> 00:28:36,301 Maybe I should tell him. 715 00:28:36,381 --> 00:28:38,801 He already knows. 716 00:28:38,883 --> 00:28:41,933 Isaac, I don't know what to do. 717 00:28:42,011 --> 00:28:45,521 Sounds like a problem for 718 00:28:45,598 --> 00:28:47,428 dear Beverly. 719 00:28:47,517 --> 00:28:48,477 Sounds more like dear Beverly's 720 00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:50,150 problem. 721 00:29:12,292 --> 00:29:13,332 Want to sit for a minute? 722 00:29:13,418 --> 00:29:14,378 Oh yeah. 723 00:29:17,422 --> 00:29:20,012 Ah. 724 00:29:20,091 --> 00:29:20,881 Beautiful day... 725 00:29:30,935 --> 00:29:31,845 Well, I thought it was a 726 00:29:31,936 --> 00:29:34,606 beautiful day. 727 00:29:34,689 --> 00:29:36,479 What's wrong? 728 00:29:36,566 --> 00:29:39,736 My mind's playing tricks on me. 729 00:29:39,819 --> 00:29:41,529 For a moment, I thought I smelled 730 00:29:41,613 --> 00:29:42,663 Jeff's pipe tobacco, and 731 00:29:42,739 --> 00:29:45,869 then the baby kicked. 732 00:29:45,950 --> 00:29:47,870 Oh, doc, I'm having a terrible 733 00:29:47,952 --> 00:29:49,872 time. 734 00:29:49,954 --> 00:29:51,714 You see, I want the baby to know 735 00:29:51,789 --> 00:29:54,249 his father, and he would have if 736 00:29:54,334 --> 00:29:56,634 I hadn't been such a damn fool 737 00:29:56,711 --> 00:29:58,381 and pushed Jeff up into the arms 738 00:29:58,463 --> 00:30:00,223 of another woman. 739 00:30:02,509 --> 00:30:04,219 Gail, I don't have any more 740 00:30:04,302 --> 00:30:06,722 dry shoulders. 741 00:30:06,804 --> 00:30:08,184 You're not solving anything by 742 00:30:08,264 --> 00:30:09,064 telling all this to me. 743 00:30:09,140 --> 00:30:11,730 Tell it to him. 744 00:30:11,809 --> 00:30:13,059 You've got a whole jackpot's 745 00:30:13,144 --> 00:30:14,194 worth of quarters. 746 00:30:14,270 --> 00:30:15,400 Now, why don't you put some of 747 00:30:15,480 --> 00:30:20,570 'em into a phone. 748 00:30:20,652 --> 00:30:24,282 Maybe I'll hit the jackpot again. 749 00:30:24,364 --> 00:30:28,454 Thanks, doc. 750 00:30:28,535 --> 00:30:30,075 Doc? 751 00:30:46,386 --> 00:30:47,966 So, remember, live by the good 752 00:30:48,054 --> 00:30:50,934 old golden rule, and with 753 00:30:51,015 --> 00:30:52,425 the price of gold now a days, 754 00:30:52,517 --> 00:30:53,767 I mean, it's getting more 755 00:30:53,851 --> 00:30:57,441 valuable every day... 756 00:30:57,522 --> 00:30:58,612 Thank you. 757 00:30:58,690 --> 00:31:00,280 Thank you very much... 758 00:31:00,358 --> 00:31:01,318 Oh, excuse me. 759 00:31:01,401 --> 00:31:03,441 May I get something to drink. 760 00:31:03,528 --> 00:31:05,448 I...my tummy's not feeling very well, 761 00:31:05,530 --> 00:31:06,320 it's something I ate, 762 00:31:06,406 --> 00:31:06,656 i guess. 763 00:31:06,739 --> 00:31:07,449 Certainly. 764 00:31:07,532 --> 00:31:09,282 Thank you. 765 00:31:09,367 --> 00:31:10,867 Any questions? 766 00:31:10,952 --> 00:31:11,952 Yes? 767 00:31:12,036 --> 00:31:13,956 I'm planning to get married when 768 00:31:14,038 --> 00:31:15,368 I graduate next year. 769 00:31:15,456 --> 00:31:16,166 What are some of the most 770 00:31:16,249 --> 00:31:18,209 popular honeymoon places? 771 00:31:18,293 --> 00:31:23,013 Well, with me, it was blowing in my ear. 772 00:31:23,089 --> 00:31:24,469 But, why don't you ask your 773 00:31:24,549 --> 00:31:25,629 travel agent, I'm sure she has 774 00:31:25,717 --> 00:31:28,967 better suggestions... 775 00:31:29,053 --> 00:31:30,393 Thank you... 776 00:31:34,726 --> 00:31:36,056 Any other questions?... 777 00:31:38,146 --> 00:31:40,106 Yes? 778 00:31:40,189 --> 00:31:41,149 Oh, no. 779 00:31:41,232 --> 00:31:44,152 Never mind. 780 00:31:44,235 --> 00:31:45,275 Yes, gopher? 781 00:31:48,573 --> 00:31:51,163 Well, this isn't about me. 782 00:31:51,242 --> 00:31:55,502 That's what they all say. 783 00:31:55,580 --> 00:31:57,670 Go on. 784 00:31:57,749 --> 00:31:59,999 Well, uh, this, um, 785 00:32:00,084 --> 00:32:01,134 friend of mine. 786 00:32:01,210 --> 00:32:02,550 She's very witty and charming 787 00:32:02,629 --> 00:32:06,799 and...gorgeous, 788 00:32:06,883 --> 00:32:08,343 but she's so wrapped up in her job, 789 00:32:08,426 --> 00:32:10,086 that she never pays any attention to her husband, 790 00:32:10,178 --> 00:32:14,178 and now he's beginning to, 791 00:32:14,265 --> 00:32:16,175 wander, and...I, 792 00:32:16,267 --> 00:32:18,517 I don't want to hurt my friend, 793 00:32:18,603 --> 00:32:19,943 but how do I tell her? 794 00:32:20,021 --> 00:32:21,691 Oh, well, don't bother. 795 00:32:21,773 --> 00:32:24,653 If she's so insensitive that she 796 00:32:24,734 --> 00:32:25,904 can't give the time of day to 797 00:32:25,985 --> 00:32:27,895 her husband, then he's right to 798 00:32:27,987 --> 00:32:29,237 give the time of night to 799 00:32:29,322 --> 00:32:30,282 someone else... 800 00:32:38,623 --> 00:32:40,043 Ladies and gentlemen, 801 00:32:40,124 --> 00:32:43,384 i think my time is just about up. 802 00:32:43,461 --> 00:32:50,551 Thank you very much. 803 00:32:50,635 --> 00:32:52,885 Captain, please write the apology. 804 00:32:52,970 --> 00:32:54,430 I'm telling you, he means it. 805 00:32:54,514 --> 00:32:55,774 He's gonna go out on strike and 806 00:32:55,848 --> 00:32:56,888 take the whole kitchen staff 807 00:32:56,974 --> 00:32:57,394 with him. 808 00:32:57,475 --> 00:32:58,555 It's absurd! 809 00:32:58,643 --> 00:32:59,693 He's bluffing. 810 00:32:59,769 --> 00:33:00,309 What if he's not? 811 00:33:00,395 --> 00:33:01,895 Miss McCoy, I have commanded 812 00:33:01,979 --> 00:33:02,899 everything from 813 00:33:02,980 --> 00:33:04,270 destroyer to cruise ship. 814 00:33:04,357 --> 00:33:06,937 I have weathered typhoon, enemy 815 00:33:07,026 --> 00:33:07,646 fire. 816 00:33:07,735 --> 00:33:09,065 Believe me, this isn't something 817 00:33:09,153 --> 00:33:18,963 I can't handle. 818 00:33:19,038 --> 00:33:19,868 Hey, Julie, you done with 819 00:33:19,956 --> 00:33:20,916 that salad yet? 820 00:33:20,998 --> 00:33:22,668 Hey, stop worrying about me 821 00:33:22,750 --> 00:33:24,920 and concentrate on that, 822 00:33:25,002 --> 00:33:26,422 inferno you're cooking. 823 00:33:26,504 --> 00:33:27,554 What is that? 824 00:33:27,630 --> 00:33:28,090 What do I know? 825 00:33:28,172 --> 00:33:28,592 I'm only cooking it, 826 00:33:28,673 --> 00:33:30,633 I'm not gonna eat it. 827 00:33:33,970 --> 00:33:35,890 Hey, hey, hey, hey, wait, 828 00:33:35,972 --> 00:33:36,562 wait, wait, keep your potato 829 00:33:36,639 --> 00:33:38,219 peelings out of my soup, man. 830 00:33:38,307 --> 00:33:39,477 Soup? 831 00:33:39,559 --> 00:33:41,599 I thought this was the garbage. 832 00:33:41,686 --> 00:33:42,476 Listen, doc, can you help me 833 00:33:42,562 --> 00:33:43,602 stir the... 834 00:33:43,688 --> 00:33:44,018 Okay. 835 00:33:44,105 --> 00:33:45,605 Just a second... 836 00:33:45,690 --> 00:33:47,610 Okay, boy this soup is really 837 00:33:47,692 --> 00:33:49,782 gonna stick to your ribs. 838 00:33:49,861 --> 00:33:50,611 How are you gonna get it 839 00:33:50,695 --> 00:33:51,605 out of the pot? 840 00:33:51,696 --> 00:33:52,696 Let me taste that, 841 00:33:52,780 --> 00:33:53,490 excuse me, mr.Washington, 842 00:33:53,573 --> 00:33:54,533 thank you... 843 00:33:59,704 --> 00:34:01,254 Needs ketchup. 844 00:34:01,330 --> 00:34:02,250 Hurry up with those potatoes, 845 00:34:02,331 --> 00:34:03,331 mr.smith. 846 00:34:03,416 --> 00:34:04,036 Sir, I've already peeled 847 00:34:04,125 --> 00:34:04,955 half of Idaho, how many more do 848 00:34:05,042 --> 00:34:05,712 you want? 849 00:34:05,793 --> 00:34:07,003 Just peel the other half of Idaho, 850 00:34:07,086 --> 00:34:08,166 that'll take care of it. 851 00:34:08,254 --> 00:34:08,884 Captain, if anybody needs 852 00:34:08,963 --> 00:34:10,633 anything well done, I've got it. 853 00:34:10,715 --> 00:34:12,335 You can't serve that. 854 00:34:12,425 --> 00:34:13,795 That's burnt to a crisp! 855 00:34:13,885 --> 00:34:15,135 Captain, pork has to be 856 00:34:15,219 --> 00:34:16,639 cooked very, very thoroughly. 857 00:34:16,721 --> 00:34:18,471 That's pork? 858 00:34:18,556 --> 00:34:21,926 It's filet of sole. 859 00:34:22,018 --> 00:34:22,808 Oh, captain, this whole 860 00:34:22,894 --> 00:34:24,984 thing is stupid... 861 00:34:25,062 --> 00:34:27,402 Not that I mind, but, it's not 862 00:34:27,482 --> 00:34:30,492 fair to the passengers. 863 00:34:30,568 --> 00:34:32,488 Please apologize. 864 00:34:32,570 --> 00:34:35,360 Never! 865 00:34:35,448 --> 00:34:36,318 Thank you, miss McCoy, 866 00:34:36,407 --> 00:34:37,867 thank you... 867 00:34:45,208 --> 00:34:53,838 Oh, so...You came to apologize. 868 00:34:53,925 --> 00:34:55,255 Needs ketchup. 869 00:35:01,432 --> 00:35:04,022 Sir, what about your dinner rolls? 870 00:35:04,101 --> 00:35:05,141 Don't worry. 871 00:35:05,228 --> 00:35:06,728 I'll fry them when I get back. 872 00:35:11,776 --> 00:35:13,026 I'm sorry. 873 00:35:13,110 --> 00:35:15,360 But all you people don't have to 874 00:35:15,446 --> 00:35:16,406 do this if it wasn't for your 875 00:35:16,489 --> 00:35:19,029 stubborn captain. 876 00:35:19,116 --> 00:35:21,696 All I ask for is an apology, 877 00:35:21,786 --> 00:35:23,656 in writing. 878 00:35:28,960 --> 00:35:31,000 How are you at forgery? 879 00:35:31,087 --> 00:35:32,087 Hey, a piece of cake. 880 00:35:32,171 --> 00:35:33,211 Cake! 881 00:35:33,297 --> 00:35:33,667 What are we gonna do about 882 00:35:33,756 --> 00:35:36,376 dessert?! 883 00:35:44,350 --> 00:35:45,730 Here you are, chef borga, 884 00:35:45,810 --> 00:35:48,860 just what you asked for. 885 00:35:48,938 --> 00:35:53,278 Ah, I knew he would apologize. 886 00:35:53,359 --> 00:35:55,239 Stubborn man that captain, but, 887 00:35:55,319 --> 00:35:57,359 at least he knows when he's been 888 00:35:57,446 --> 00:35:58,156 defeated. 889 00:35:58,239 --> 00:36:00,199 Then you will return to the kitchen? 890 00:36:00,283 --> 00:36:01,243 Of course. 891 00:36:01,325 --> 00:36:02,575 Oh... 892 00:36:02,660 --> 00:36:08,250 A maestro's place is with the orchestra, 893 00:36:08,332 --> 00:36:12,922 not in the audience. 894 00:36:13,004 --> 00:36:14,214 My sincere apologies, 895 00:36:14,297 --> 00:36:16,547 Antonio borga.' Didn't I tell ya 896 00:36:16,632 --> 00:36:17,592 he'd break first? 897 00:36:17,675 --> 00:36:19,585 I knew he'd crumble once he 898 00:36:19,677 --> 00:36:20,927 realized we could do his job as 899 00:36:21,012 --> 00:36:23,432 well as he could. 900 00:36:35,693 --> 00:36:37,073 Oh, I'm sorry darling, I didn't 901 00:36:37,153 --> 00:36:37,783 know you were working. 902 00:36:37,862 --> 00:36:38,452 I'll be back later. 903 00:36:38,529 --> 00:36:39,989 Oh, Russ, Russ, come in darling. 904 00:36:40,072 --> 00:36:41,282 This is a special column I want 905 00:36:41,365 --> 00:36:43,775 you to hear. 906 00:36:43,868 --> 00:36:48,158 Uh, sure. 907 00:36:48,247 --> 00:36:50,627 "Dear readers: Instead of you 908 00:36:50,708 --> 00:36:53,288 writing to me today, I am writing 909 00:36:53,377 --> 00:36:55,087 this letter to you. 910 00:36:55,171 --> 00:36:57,341 You won't be hearing from me for 911 00:36:57,423 --> 00:36:59,473 the next two weeks, because I'll 912 00:36:59,550 --> 00:37:01,140 be going on a vacation with my 913 00:37:01,219 --> 00:37:02,179 husband. 914 00:37:02,261 --> 00:37:03,301 I don't know where he's going to 915 00:37:03,387 --> 00:37:04,807 take me, but I'm sure he'll pick 916 00:37:04,889 --> 00:37:07,139 a spot where the two of us can 917 00:37:07,224 --> 00:37:08,774 be blissfully and marvelously 918 00:37:08,851 --> 00:37:11,481 alone. 919 00:37:11,562 --> 00:37:16,282 You kept me very busy for a long time, 920 00:37:16,359 --> 00:37:18,239 but if I am too busy to spend 921 00:37:18,319 --> 00:37:20,239 some time with my husband,i, 922 00:37:20,321 --> 00:37:22,531 I might lose him, and nothing 923 00:37:22,615 --> 00:37:24,525 in the world would be worth 924 00:37:24,617 --> 00:37:25,657 that. 925 00:37:25,743 --> 00:37:29,663 Not fame, not fortune, not 926 00:37:29,747 --> 00:37:32,457 anything. 927 00:37:32,541 --> 00:37:39,471 Yours always, mrs.Russell Blanchard." 928 00:37:46,555 --> 00:37:47,675 Am I too late? 929 00:37:55,773 --> 00:37:58,533 I have a life subscription. 930 00:37:58,609 --> 00:37:59,899 I love you, bev. 931 00:37:59,986 --> 00:38:01,736 That Peggy, she... 932 00:38:01,821 --> 00:38:02,861 Don't confess. 933 00:38:02,947 --> 00:38:03,907 Never confess. 934 00:38:03,990 --> 00:38:05,990 It, it just doesn't solve anything. 935 00:38:06,075 --> 00:38:07,325 What is that advice? 936 00:38:07,410 --> 00:38:08,370 Oh, I'm not going to give any 937 00:38:08,452 --> 00:38:10,792 advice for the next two weeks. 938 00:38:10,871 --> 00:38:14,671 Why don't you write to dear Abby. 939 00:38:42,695 --> 00:38:44,605 Well, I'm glad to see everything 940 00:38:44,697 --> 00:38:45,737 is back to normal, 941 00:38:45,823 --> 00:38:46,783 chef borga. 942 00:38:46,866 --> 00:38:48,076 That makes two of us, 943 00:38:48,159 --> 00:38:49,579 captain stubing. 944 00:38:49,660 --> 00:38:51,250 You know, captain, maybe 945 00:38:51,328 --> 00:38:51,908 we should leave. 946 00:38:51,996 --> 00:38:53,366 I'm sure that chef borga has a 947 00:38:53,456 --> 00:38:54,616 lot of work to do, and... 948 00:38:54,707 --> 00:38:56,037 In a minute, in a minute. 949 00:38:56,125 --> 00:38:58,375 Antonio, I know that I am not 950 00:38:58,461 --> 00:39:00,551 the easiest man in the world to 951 00:39:00,629 --> 00:39:01,589 deal with. 952 00:39:01,672 --> 00:39:03,512 That's true. 953 00:39:03,591 --> 00:39:04,881 And I know I pushed you 954 00:39:04,967 --> 00:39:05,927 to your limit. 955 00:39:06,010 --> 00:39:07,470 But, I want you to know that I 956 00:39:07,553 --> 00:39:10,433 think it was very big of you to 957 00:39:10,514 --> 00:39:12,604 apologize. 958 00:39:12,683 --> 00:39:14,943 What? 959 00:39:15,019 --> 00:39:16,269 What did he say? 960 00:39:16,353 --> 00:39:18,273 I didn't apologize to you. 961 00:39:18,355 --> 00:39:19,565 You're the one who backed down. 962 00:39:19,648 --> 00:39:20,688 Me? 963 00:39:30,743 --> 00:39:31,623 I never wrote that. 964 00:39:31,702 --> 00:39:32,792 I never wrote this. 965 00:39:32,870 --> 00:39:33,790 Then who did? 966 00:39:33,871 --> 00:39:37,081 Beats me. 967 00:39:37,166 --> 00:39:38,916 Maybe we'd better go find out. 968 00:39:39,001 --> 00:39:40,251 Yeah. 969 00:39:40,336 --> 00:39:41,916 Captain, you never know, there 970 00:39:42,004 --> 00:39:42,764 might be a forger on board. 971 00:39:47,051 --> 00:39:49,471 So, you never did apologize, eh? 972 00:39:49,553 --> 00:39:50,143 Why should I? 973 00:39:50,221 --> 00:39:51,311 I wasn't at fault. 974 00:39:51,388 --> 00:39:52,468 Then what are you doing 975 00:39:52,556 --> 00:39:52,966 in my kitchen?! 976 00:39:53,057 --> 00:39:55,097 This is my kitchen. 977 00:39:55,184 --> 00:39:56,984 You work for me. 978 00:39:57,061 --> 00:39:58,311 When will you ever get that 979 00:39:58,395 --> 00:40:00,685 through your head?!... 980 00:40:08,030 --> 00:40:11,490 All right... 981 00:40:11,575 --> 00:40:15,655 All right.. 982 00:40:15,746 --> 00:40:20,376 I apologize. 983 00:40:20,459 --> 00:40:23,339 Because of my line, because of 984 00:40:23,420 --> 00:40:25,050 my crew, because of my 985 00:40:25,131 --> 00:40:26,511 passengers. 986 00:40:26,590 --> 00:40:29,220 Captain, you are a gentleman. 987 00:40:29,301 --> 00:40:31,181 And because, I happen 988 00:40:31,262 --> 00:40:33,182 to be the only captain afloat 989 00:40:33,264 --> 00:40:43,234 with dishpan hands. 990 00:40:43,315 --> 00:40:48,645 With dishpan hands. 991 00:40:48,737 --> 00:40:49,317 Come on, Gail. 992 00:40:49,405 --> 00:40:50,525 You can't give up just because 993 00:40:50,614 --> 00:40:51,914 of one phone call. 994 00:40:51,991 --> 00:40:53,911 It wasn't just one phone call. 995 00:40:53,993 --> 00:40:55,373 It was a lot of phone calls. 996 00:40:55,452 --> 00:40:56,702 Finally, I called his office, 997 00:40:56,787 --> 00:40:58,787 and they said he'd gone on a trip. 998 00:40:58,873 --> 00:41:00,213 He's probably with her. 999 00:41:00,291 --> 00:41:01,041 Now, wait a minute. 1000 00:41:01,125 --> 00:41:01,705 Back up. 1001 00:41:01,792 --> 00:41:02,792 Look, your husband is a travel 1002 00:41:02,877 --> 00:41:03,877 agent, right? 1003 00:41:03,961 --> 00:41:05,171 Well, is he or isn't he? 1004 00:41:05,254 --> 00:41:05,804 Yes, he is. 1005 00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:07,090 All right, he goes on trips 1006 00:41:07,173 --> 00:41:08,223 all the time. 1007 00:41:08,299 --> 00:41:09,219 And, where is it written that 1008 00:41:09,300 --> 00:41:12,090 he's with anybody? 1009 00:41:12,178 --> 00:41:13,218 You're right. 1010 00:41:13,304 --> 00:41:14,054 You're right. 1011 00:41:14,138 --> 00:41:14,928 Why am I such a pessimist? 1012 00:41:15,014 --> 00:41:16,104 I'm getting to be a real pain in 1013 00:41:16,182 --> 00:41:16,892 the neck to you. 1014 00:41:16,974 --> 00:41:18,234 That's all right, I'm a physician. 1015 00:41:18,309 --> 00:41:21,439 I can heal myself. 1016 00:41:23,439 --> 00:41:24,729 Very, very confusing. 1017 00:41:24,815 --> 00:41:26,395 But, then the captain finally 1018 00:41:26,483 --> 00:41:27,943 did apologize. 1019 00:41:28,027 --> 00:41:29,317 For real. 1020 00:41:29,403 --> 00:41:32,243 I couldn't believe it. 1021 00:41:32,323 --> 00:41:33,413 Well, anyway, that's why I 1022 00:41:33,490 --> 00:41:35,240 haven't been around much all day. 1023 00:41:35,326 --> 00:41:35,826 Well, that's okay. 1024 00:41:35,910 --> 00:41:37,910 It gave me time to think. 1025 00:41:37,995 --> 00:41:39,035 You're absolutely right. 1026 00:41:39,121 --> 00:41:41,041 I'm gonna get in touch with Gail, 1027 00:41:41,123 --> 00:41:41,923 and tell her that I love her. 1028 00:41:41,999 --> 00:41:43,039 Oh! 1029 00:41:43,125 --> 00:41:44,125 Because I do love her, and 1030 00:41:44,210 --> 00:41:46,130 there's nothing I want more than 1031 00:41:46,212 --> 00:41:46,842 to be with her. 1032 00:41:46,921 --> 00:41:49,761 Oh, Jeff, I'm so happy for you! 1033 00:41:49,840 --> 00:41:50,720 So, I told him if he 1034 00:41:50,799 --> 00:41:53,589 really expected me to... 1035 00:41:53,677 --> 00:41:54,887 Oh, my god. 1036 00:41:54,970 --> 00:41:55,720 What is it? 1037 00:41:55,804 --> 00:41:56,934 Why, that's Jeff, and that 1038 00:41:57,014 --> 00:41:58,064 must be her! 1039 00:41:58,140 --> 00:41:59,640 That's Julie McCoy, our 1040 00:41:59,725 --> 00:42:00,805 cruise director. 1041 00:42:00,893 --> 00:42:01,943 Oh. 1042 00:42:02,019 --> 00:42:02,979 Ohhhh! 1043 00:42:03,062 --> 00:42:04,102 Oh, doc... 1044 00:42:04,188 --> 00:42:05,188 What? 1045 00:42:05,272 --> 00:42:07,272 I think the baby's coming! 1046 00:42:07,358 --> 00:42:08,438 Okay, put your arm around 1047 00:42:08,525 --> 00:42:09,485 my neck. 1048 00:42:09,568 --> 00:42:11,108 Everything's gonna be okay. 1049 00:42:11,195 --> 00:42:12,945 Jeff, what's wrong? 1050 00:42:13,030 --> 00:42:14,070 Gail! 1051 00:42:14,156 --> 00:42:15,736 My god, why didn't you tell me? 1052 00:42:15,824 --> 00:42:16,414 Would you excuse us, 1053 00:42:16,492 --> 00:42:16,832 please. 1054 00:42:16,909 --> 00:42:17,909 I'm her husband. 1055 00:42:17,993 --> 00:42:18,703 In just a little while ago 1056 00:42:18,786 --> 00:42:19,286 you're gonna be more than a husband, 1057 00:42:19,370 --> 00:42:21,580 you're gonna be a father. 1058 00:42:21,664 --> 00:42:22,624 I'm scared. 1059 00:42:22,706 --> 00:42:23,616 Okay, hold on tight. 1060 00:42:23,707 --> 00:42:24,747 I'm gonna pick you up, and carry 1061 00:42:24,833 --> 00:42:25,503 you to my office. 1062 00:42:25,584 --> 00:42:26,794 May I, doctor, please. 1063 00:42:26,877 --> 00:42:27,127 Okay. 1064 00:42:27,211 --> 00:42:28,171 Gently. 1065 00:42:28,254 --> 00:42:29,304 Honey, I love you. 1066 00:42:29,380 --> 00:42:30,010 I don't know what happened to us, 1067 00:42:30,089 --> 00:42:31,259 but it's not gonna happen again. 1068 00:42:31,340 --> 00:42:32,300 Doc, how can I help? 1069 00:42:32,383 --> 00:42:33,433 Forget it. 1070 00:42:33,509 --> 00:42:34,719 I saw you make a salad. 1071 00:42:34,802 --> 00:42:39,642 Honey... 1072 00:42:39,723 --> 00:42:40,313 Okay. 1073 00:42:40,391 --> 00:42:42,481 Bear down. 1074 00:42:42,559 --> 00:42:43,639 And I never stopped thinking 1075 00:42:43,727 --> 00:42:44,307 about you one minute 1076 00:42:44,395 --> 00:42:47,435 the whole time we were apart. 1077 00:42:47,523 --> 00:42:48,483 Breathe. 1078 00:42:48,565 --> 00:42:49,975 I am. 1079 00:42:50,067 --> 00:42:50,477 Not you. 1080 00:42:50,567 --> 00:42:51,937 Her. 1081 00:42:56,240 --> 00:42:59,370 I was too proud to say I was wrong. 1082 00:42:59,451 --> 00:43:02,001 But I'm not too proud now. 1083 00:43:02,079 --> 00:43:03,869 Bear down. 1084 00:43:05,916 --> 00:43:08,206 Jeff, I have so much to tell you, 1085 00:43:08,294 --> 00:43:09,174 but, it's gonna have to... 1086 00:43:09,253 --> 00:43:22,523 Wait. 1087 00:43:22,599 --> 00:43:25,389 Julie, Julie, listen, you sit, 1088 00:43:25,477 --> 00:43:26,517 I'll pace. 1089 00:43:26,603 --> 00:43:28,653 Thanks. 1090 00:43:28,731 --> 00:43:30,691 What is taking so long?! 1091 00:43:30,774 --> 00:43:32,694 Don't ask me, I've never 1092 00:43:32,776 --> 00:43:36,986 had any babies. 1093 00:43:37,072 --> 00:43:37,702 Well, don't ask me, I've never 1094 00:43:37,781 --> 00:43:41,911 had any babies either. 1095 00:43:41,994 --> 00:43:42,494 Has doc ever delivered a 1096 00:43:42,578 --> 00:43:44,368 baby before? 1097 00:43:44,455 --> 00:43:45,655 Listen, listen, I've never 1098 00:43:45,748 --> 00:43:47,328 made soup for six hundred 1099 00:43:47,416 --> 00:43:49,036 people before, but it turned out 1100 00:43:49,126 --> 00:43:51,996 great. 1101 00:43:52,087 --> 00:43:53,757 I'll be the judge of that. 1102 00:43:53,839 --> 00:43:55,549 We have nothing to worry about. 1103 00:43:55,632 --> 00:43:56,222 I'm sure doc is doing a 1104 00:43:56,300 --> 00:43:57,550 wonderful job. 1105 00:43:57,634 --> 00:43:59,604 Oh, I'm sure he is. 1106 00:43:59,678 --> 00:44:01,638 I mean, that's one of the things 1107 00:44:01,722 --> 00:44:02,062 that constantly amazes me about 1108 00:44:02,139 --> 00:44:03,389 doc. 1109 00:44:03,474 --> 00:44:07,734 That he's really a doctor. 1110 00:44:07,811 --> 00:44:08,601 He is, isn't he? 1111 00:44:08,687 --> 00:44:09,727 I mean, it's not a nickname 1112 00:44:09,813 --> 00:44:14,233 just...? 1113 00:44:14,318 --> 00:44:15,278 Well... 1114 00:44:15,361 --> 00:44:18,571 Has my new passenger boarded? 1115 00:44:18,655 --> 00:44:19,735 Not yet, sir. 1116 00:44:26,830 --> 00:44:29,380 Well, what's tak... 1117 00:44:29,458 --> 00:44:32,418 What's taking so long? 1118 00:44:35,672 --> 00:44:36,422 Has the doc delivered a baby 1119 00:44:36,507 --> 00:44:38,127 before? 1120 00:44:42,179 --> 00:44:46,179 He really is a doctor, isn't he? 1121 00:44:51,438 --> 00:44:52,308 Bear down. 1122 00:44:52,398 --> 00:44:54,938 Baby's in a good position. 1123 00:44:55,025 --> 00:44:57,275 What's taking so long? 1124 00:44:57,361 --> 00:45:01,241 Towel... 1125 00:45:01,323 --> 00:45:02,283 Okay, one more time now, and I 1126 00:45:02,366 --> 00:45:04,446 think we've got it... 1127 00:45:04,535 --> 00:45:05,735 Okay, bear down a little 1128 00:45:05,828 --> 00:45:09,498 harder... 1129 00:45:09,581 --> 00:45:12,041 Here we go, this is it... 1130 00:45:15,379 --> 00:45:20,049 Well, hello, mr.Smith! 1131 00:45:22,302 --> 00:45:25,222 Honey, it's a boy!!... 1132 00:45:35,566 --> 00:45:38,776 Oh, doc, tell me the truth. 1133 00:45:38,861 --> 00:45:39,531 Is this the first baby you ever 1134 00:45:39,611 --> 00:45:40,651 delivered? 1135 00:45:40,737 --> 00:45:41,317 The first? 1136 00:45:41,405 --> 00:45:42,775 Come on, I've been delivering 1137 00:45:42,865 --> 00:45:43,815 babies since medical school, 1138 00:45:43,907 --> 00:45:46,987 nineteen sixty-two... 1139 00:45:47,077 --> 00:45:50,577 This is the second. 1140 00:45:58,589 --> 00:46:02,299 He really is a doctor. 1141 00:46:29,411 --> 00:46:30,371 Well, hi. 1142 00:46:30,454 --> 00:46:31,504 Well, hello. 1143 00:46:31,580 --> 00:46:32,870 Don't tell me the whole 1144 00:46:32,956 --> 00:46:34,206 cruise went by, and I never met 1145 00:46:34,291 --> 00:46:35,581 you. 1146 00:46:35,667 --> 00:46:37,707 Well, you're meeting me now. 1147 00:46:37,794 --> 00:46:38,424 Better later than never. 1148 00:46:38,504 --> 00:46:41,884 Uh huh. 1149 00:46:41,965 --> 00:46:43,045 That's the man who was with 1150 00:46:43,133 --> 00:46:44,843 the pregnant lady. 1151 00:46:44,927 --> 00:46:46,847 And that's the lady you was 1152 00:46:46,929 --> 00:46:50,769 with dear Beverly's husband. 1153 00:46:50,849 --> 00:46:52,519 Sex fiend! 1154 00:46:55,771 --> 00:46:56,771 Well, gee, now I am sorry 1155 00:46:56,855 --> 00:46:58,015 I didn't meet you earlier. 1156 00:47:03,320 --> 00:47:05,450 Gopher...gopher, 1157 00:47:05,531 --> 00:47:06,821 thank you. 1158 00:47:06,907 --> 00:47:07,867 Thank you from the bottom of my 1159 00:47:07,950 --> 00:47:08,910 heart. 1160 00:47:08,992 --> 00:47:09,622 Looks like your advice 1161 00:47:09,701 --> 00:47:11,581 is gonna work out for my friend. 1162 00:47:11,662 --> 00:47:12,752 Oh, yes, they're going 1163 00:47:12,829 --> 00:47:14,249 to live happily ever after. 1164 00:47:14,331 --> 00:47:16,041 What's this all about? 1165 00:47:16,124 --> 00:47:18,044 Oh, well, I have these two hamsters, 1166 00:47:18,126 --> 00:47:19,706 and they just haven't been getting alone 1167 00:47:19,795 --> 00:47:21,455 as well as they should! 1168 00:47:21,547 --> 00:47:23,297 Thank you. 1169 00:47:23,382 --> 00:47:25,932 There you are, darling. 1170 00:47:26,009 --> 00:47:26,969 You see. 1171 00:47:27,052 --> 00:47:30,642 Bye. 1172 00:47:30,722 --> 00:47:32,312 Hey, you're a great chef, 1173 00:47:32,391 --> 00:47:34,231 and you can sail with me anytime. 1174 00:47:34,309 --> 00:47:36,229 Oh, (thank you in Italian). 1175 00:47:36,311 --> 00:47:38,561 Thank you, and you... 1176 00:47:38,647 --> 00:47:39,397 Are a fine captain. 1177 00:47:39,481 --> 00:47:39,731 Thank you. 1178 00:47:39,815 --> 00:47:40,265 Thank you. 1179 00:47:40,357 --> 00:47:40,977 I want to tell you that 1180 00:47:41,066 --> 00:47:42,726 chocolate soufflé last night was 1181 00:47:42,818 --> 00:47:44,738 the best I've ever tasted! 1182 00:47:44,820 --> 00:47:46,780 I thought you would like it. 1183 00:47:46,863 --> 00:47:48,703 It's the first time I ever made 1184 00:47:48,782 --> 00:47:49,782 it with ketchup. 1185 00:47:49,866 --> 00:47:51,286 What? 1186 00:47:51,368 --> 00:47:53,078 Just a little joke. 1187 00:47:53,161 --> 00:47:54,411 You see, chef borga has a sense 1188 00:47:54,496 --> 00:47:55,456 of humor, too. 1189 00:47:55,539 --> 00:47:56,579 Yes. 1190 00:47:56,665 --> 00:47:58,455 Arriverdeci... 1191 00:48:00,752 --> 00:48:02,462 Goodbye, merrill. 1192 00:48:02,546 --> 00:48:04,376 Chow, Antonio. 1193 00:48:08,594 --> 00:48:09,934 Isn't he beautiful? 1194 00:48:10,012 --> 00:48:11,642 Jeff, you're not coming home 1195 00:48:11,722 --> 00:48:15,482 because of the baby, are you? 1196 00:48:15,559 --> 00:48:16,479 Yes I am. 1197 00:48:16,560 --> 00:48:17,520 What? 1198 00:48:17,603 --> 00:48:19,313 I'm coming home for you, 1199 00:48:19,396 --> 00:48:21,186 for us, 1200 00:48:21,273 --> 00:48:25,493 especially for me. 1201 00:48:25,569 --> 00:48:26,859 I need you, Gail. 1202 00:48:38,915 --> 00:48:39,955 Bye, bye. 1203 00:48:40,042 --> 00:48:41,672 Bye, bye. 1204 00:48:41,752 --> 00:48:46,342 Well, look who's here! 1205 00:48:46,423 --> 00:48:48,133 Time to say good-bye. 1206 00:48:48,216 --> 00:48:49,796 How can I ever thank you, doc? 1207 00:48:49,885 --> 00:48:51,385 Yeah, thanks, doc. 1208 00:48:51,470 --> 00:48:52,140 I'll send you my bill in 1209 00:48:52,220 --> 00:48:53,180 the morning. 1210 00:48:53,263 --> 00:48:55,143 Julie, you're a good friend, 1211 00:48:55,223 --> 00:48:57,393 and a heck of a marriage counselor. 1212 00:48:57,476 --> 00:48:58,186 Well, I'll send you my 1213 00:48:58,268 --> 00:49:00,808 bill in the morning, too. 1214 00:49:00,896 --> 00:49:01,806 Okay, partner, say goodbye 1215 00:49:01,897 --> 00:49:03,187 to your uncle Isaac. 1216 00:49:03,273 --> 00:49:04,323 Bye, cleofus. 1217 00:49:04,399 --> 00:49:04,979 And your uncle gopher. 1218 00:49:05,067 --> 00:49:06,857 Your uncle Adam, and your aunt 1219 00:49:06,943 --> 00:49:08,653 Julie, and your uncle merrill. 1220 00:49:08,737 --> 00:49:11,567 Uncle merrill, sir. 1221 00:49:11,657 --> 00:49:12,197 We'd better get going. 1222 00:49:12,282 --> 00:49:12,492 We still gotta go through 1223 00:49:12,574 --> 00:49:13,284 customs. 1224 00:49:13,367 --> 00:49:16,117 And do you have something to declare. 1225 00:49:16,203 --> 00:49:17,203 Bye, bye. 1226 00:49:17,287 --> 00:49:17,697 Bye. 1227 00:49:17,788 --> 00:49:20,828 Bye.