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Cheers is filmed
before a live studio audience.
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Oh, hi, Dr. Sternin.
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Dr. Crane isn't here.
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I know. He's at home,
and that's why I'm not.
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Whoa-ho!
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Trouble in Casa de Wacko?
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Not really.
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Scotch, Woody.
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I'm just not looking
forward to going home.
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Frasier's giving me
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every indication
that he expects me
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to indulge in another one of his
silly little fantasies tonight,
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but it's really rather personal.
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I know just
what you mean.
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Husbands can drive you nuts
about stuff like that.
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Take my Eddie.
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He borrowed this
fairy princess costume
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from the ice show.
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Really.
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Every Friday night,
I have to dress up
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and put a magic
sex spell on him.
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Well, as long
as we're sharing,
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here's what I have
waiting for me.
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Every so often,
Frasier likes
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to regress
to his childhood.
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First, he insists
on calling me Mommy.
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I fix him cinnamon toast
and strawberry milk.
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Then it's bath time--
one of my favorites--
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followed by my
tucking him into bed
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and singing "All the
Pretty Little Horses."
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After that,
we make love until
the windows rattle.
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Men! They're really
something, aren't they?
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Oh, by the way, about all
that fairy princess stuff?
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I was just kidding.
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So was I.
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Oh, right, Mommy.
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Hey, guys, get
a load of this!
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Oh! Carla! Carla!
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¶ Sometimes you want to go
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¶ Where everybody
knows your name ¶
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¶ And they're always glad
you came ¶
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¶ You want to be
where you can see ¶
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¶ Our troubles
are all the same ¶
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¶ You want to go where everybody
knows your name. ¶
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Afternoon, everybody.
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Norm!
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Hey, Mr. Peterson. There's
a cold one waiting for you.
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I know. And, if she calls,
I'm not here.
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You're just the man
I want to see here.
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Listen, I want you taste
this Bloody Mary for me.
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Oh, please, Sammy.
Not again.
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We did this
all day yesterday.
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And we're going to do it all day
today until we get this right.
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Now, listen up, everybody.
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I am not losing
the Bloody Mary contest
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to Gary's Olde Towne Tavern
again.
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Now, please.
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I got Rebecca out there.
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I got Carla out there.
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They all got their
little jobs to...
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The least you can do
is taste this for me.
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All right, all right.
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There you go.
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Huh?
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What do you think?
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Not bad, Sammy.
Yeah?
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Yeah. I mean,
it's a little thick, but, uh...
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All in all,
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I'd have to say it was...
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That's great. I get the point,
man. That's very funny.
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No, no. I actually...
I rather liked that one.
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Hey, hey. Whoa, whoa.
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Would you guys stop
horsing around here?
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I'm serious. I want
this guy Gary,
and I want him bad.
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I am tired
of having him
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do everything
better than we do.
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He's got a better
softball team,
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a better
tag football team.
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Better T-shirts.
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They have T-shirts?
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Here. I'll show you.
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Oh, yeah.
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I've got that one in red.
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Ooh! They have
them in red now?
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But you got
to preorder.
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They're 100% cotton.
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All the sizes
are very true.
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I'll order one
this afternoon.
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Listen, you guys
are not taking
me seriously.
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I mean it. I want
to hurt this guy
where he lives.
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00:04:05,470 --> 00:04:07,270
Speaking of that,
have you seen his house?
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He's renovating this
beautiful old Victorian.
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It's on the cover
of Boston magazine.
I saw that.
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I hear he's coming out
with a new T-shirt of it, too.
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You guys are
not helping me.
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Sammy, I'm back.
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Well, what took you so long?
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I just spent the last two hours
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wandering through the streets
of Chinatown,
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thanks to your
brilliant directions.
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What? What?
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"Look for a shop
with a dead duck
hanging in the window."
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I defy you to find
a shop in Chinatown
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without a dead duck
in the window.
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Anyway...
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I got it.
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You are looking
at the last ounce
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of black cardamom on
the Eastern seaboard.
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Ooh...
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Nice. Sammy, let's
see that stuff, huh?
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Sammy, you really
think that stuff
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is going help us
win the contest?
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Are you kidding me?
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Wait until you see
what this does
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to the taste of a Bloody Mary.
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Whoo, boy!
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This is pretty pungent stuff,
huh?
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Oh, my God! My allergy.
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Did someone bring some
black cardamom in here?
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Woody! It's all gone!
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Great. There goes the contest.
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Well, big deal.
In about 20 minutes,
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I'm going to swell up
like a blowfish.
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Well, what... what
are we supposed to do now?
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Usually, I pack
my face in ice.
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Sam, guess what
I've got under my coat.
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If I guess right,
can I keep them?
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No, you idiot.
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I've got some of Gary's
top secret Bloody Mary mix.
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Hey, way to go,
Rebecca!
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Baby, how did you get it?
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How do you
think I got it?
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You did that dorky twirl,
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and, when he laughed,
you grabbed it and ran.
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Okay, fine. Forget it.
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I'm not going to tell you.
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Oh, come on.
We won't make fun of you.
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All right.
That thing Carla said.
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Well, I'm the one
that got it.
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Well, that's good.
That's good.
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Now I'm going to take it down
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to the company
pharmaceutical division
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and have it analyzed
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00:06:03,470 --> 00:06:04,970
to find out
Gary's secret ingredient.
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No, no. No need
to do that, Rebecca.
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Sammy, pour me a shot
of that concoction.
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I'll tell you
exactly what's in it.
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Oh, man, I don't know.
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No, no, no. I've got very
sensitive taste buds.
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As a matter of fact,
in medieval times,
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Clavins were
the royal tasters.
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I heard they
were royal something.
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Well, I don't know
what's in it,
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but Gary makes the
best Bloody Mary
I've ever tasted.
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All right, Sammy,
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set me up with
a shot of that, huh?
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Let me have
some of that.
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Hey, hey, you guys,
don't drink it all.
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I have to take
some to the lab.
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This is great.
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Gary deserves to win
this contest every year.
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It's almost worth cramming
myself into this dress.
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Hey, I'd dress up
as a hooker
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to get some
of this stuff.
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Oh, come on, you guys.
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It can't be that special.
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I suppose you're going
to tell me
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that Cheers has never made
a Bloody Mary this good.
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Sammy, Cheers never
made anything this good.
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I wonder what's in it.
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Well, we know
there's black cardamom in it.
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Damn it, Woody!
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Ah! Cheers...
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where good times go to die.
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Well, well, well!
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If it isn't Gary from
Gary's Olde Towne Tavern.
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Look, pal,
didn't I tell you
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if you step one
more foot in here
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you'd have me
to answer to?
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Yeah, and I told you
if you got in my way
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you'd wind up
in the next zip code.
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Then we have had
this discussion, huh?
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00:07:38,270 --> 00:07:42,070
Now, I brought a little present
to my friends at Cheers.
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Oh, yeah?
What's that, Gary?
185
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Towels for you to cry into
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after I win
the Bloody Mary contest.
187
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You know what I'd like
to do with that towel?
188
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I'd like to shove
that up your nose,
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00:07:51,770 --> 00:07:53,470
pull it out your mouth
a couple times,
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and buff up your
sinuses for you.
191
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Oh, as if you could.
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Oh, I could.
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You could not.
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Could too.
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Could not.
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Could too.
197
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Could not!
198
00:08:01,970 --> 00:08:03,270
Could too!
199
00:08:03,370 --> 00:08:04,670
Way to go,
Sammy!
200
00:08:04,670 --> 00:08:08,570
See me slip that
"could too" in there?
201
00:08:08,670 --> 00:08:10,670
Well, you won that one, Malone.
202
00:08:10,770 --> 00:08:11,570
But that's
203
00:08:11,670 --> 00:08:12,970
the last thing
you're going to win.
204
00:08:13,070 --> 00:08:14,570
Hey, big shot,
we won this contest
205
00:08:14,570 --> 00:08:16,070
the first two years they had it.
206
00:08:16,070 --> 00:08:17,770
Well, since I opened,
I've won the last four.
207
00:08:17,770 --> 00:08:20,670
All that proves is
that you've won it
208
00:08:20,670 --> 00:08:22,570
twice as much
as we have.
209
00:08:22,570 --> 00:08:24,670
How did you
like that, Sam?
210
00:08:24,770 --> 00:08:26,170
Let me handle this, Woody.
211
00:08:26,170 --> 00:08:28,170
Just get going.
Get out of here, would you?
212
00:08:28,170 --> 00:08:29,670
Is this
the thanks I get
213
00:08:29,670 --> 00:08:31,470
for my
heartfelt gift?
214
00:08:31,570 --> 00:08:32,970
No.
215
00:08:33,070 --> 00:08:34,570
This is.
216
00:08:36,570 --> 00:08:38,270
Oh, that's nice.
217
00:08:38,270 --> 00:08:40,770
I see you're still hiring
the cool Grace Kelly type
218
00:08:40,770 --> 00:08:42,070
for waitresses.
219
00:08:42,070 --> 00:08:43,870
Choke on it!
220
00:08:43,870 --> 00:08:47,870
Okay, okay, I'm going back
to the Olde Towne Tavern,
221
00:08:47,970 --> 00:08:49,570
where
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00:08:49,570 --> 00:08:51,370
my exclusive satellite coverage
223
00:08:51,370 --> 00:08:53,370
of the World Welterweight
title fight
224
00:08:53,470 --> 00:08:54,870
is about to get underway.
225
00:08:54,870 --> 00:08:57,070
Hey.
226
00:08:57,170 --> 00:08:58,270
Hey, wait. Hey, come on.
227
00:09:00,470 --> 00:09:02,670
Where the hell
do you think you're going?
228
00:09:02,770 --> 00:09:04,070
Uh... just taking
a little stroll.
229
00:09:09,470 --> 00:09:12,070
Ah! That was refreshing,
wasn't it?
230
00:09:18,970 --> 00:09:20,970
Hey, Doc.
What's going on?
231
00:09:20,970 --> 00:09:23,670
Well, for one thing, I find
myself baching it again.
232
00:09:23,670 --> 00:09:25,570
Lilith finally
blow her brains out?
233
00:09:25,570 --> 00:09:29,570
No. But thank you
for asking after her, Carla.
234
00:09:30,970 --> 00:09:32,770
So where is
the lovely Dr. Sternin?
235
00:09:32,770 --> 00:09:34,570
Well, she's in Albany
for a few days
236
00:09:34,670 --> 00:09:36,970
attending a conference
on gender stereotyping.
237
00:09:37,070 --> 00:09:38,870
Gender stereotyping?
238
00:09:38,970 --> 00:09:41,870
Yes. It's unfairly attributing
certain modes of behavior
239
00:09:41,970 --> 00:09:43,370
exclusively to one sex.
240
00:09:43,470 --> 00:09:44,470
That sounds
kind of boring.
241
00:09:44,570 --> 00:09:45,570
Why did she
go to that?
242
00:09:45,670 --> 00:09:46,870
Who knows?
243
00:09:46,870 --> 00:09:48,370
You know women.
244
00:09:50,570 --> 00:09:52,370
I can't tell you
how honored we are
245
00:09:52,470 --> 00:09:53,770
that you've
chosen our bar
246
00:09:53,770 --> 00:09:55,870
as the site of the
Bloody Mary contest.
247
00:09:55,870 --> 00:09:57,570
Well, we were
going to hold it
248
00:09:57,670 --> 00:09:59,170
at Gary's
Olde Towne Tavern,
249
00:09:59,170 --> 00:10:01,670
but they're just so
darn crowded in there.
250
00:10:01,670 --> 00:10:02,970
Well, you know,
251
00:10:02,970 --> 00:10:04,970
you'll never have
that problem here.
252
00:10:06,570 --> 00:10:08,070
Well, I better be going.
253
00:10:08,070 --> 00:10:10,370
I have to drop off
a set of rules
at Gary's Tavern.
254
00:10:10,370 --> 00:10:11,970
So long.
255
00:10:11,970 --> 00:10:12,970
Bye.
256
00:10:12,970 --> 00:10:15,670
What the hey?
That's Gary on the TV.
257
00:10:15,670 --> 00:10:19,170
We hid a secret camera in
a competitor's establishment.
258
00:10:19,270 --> 00:10:24,970
Let's hear what they have to say
about Gary's Bloody Marys.
259
00:10:25,070 --> 00:10:26,870
Boy, I don't know
what's in that,
260
00:10:26,870 --> 00:10:29,970
but Gary makes the best
Bloody Mary I've ever tasted.
261
00:10:29,970 --> 00:10:31,570
Really?
262
00:10:31,570 --> 00:10:33,470
Gary deserves to win
this contest every year.
263
00:10:33,570 --> 00:10:34,670
Thank you very much.
264
00:10:34,770 --> 00:10:36,070
And you'd be surprised
265
00:10:36,070 --> 00:10:37,570
what some people would do
266
00:10:37,570 --> 00:10:39,670
to get a hold
of my Bloody Mary mix.
267
00:10:39,670 --> 00:10:42,170
Hey, I'd dress up
like a hooker to get
some of this stuff.
268
00:10:42,170 --> 00:10:44,770
But you can get
a pretty good Bloody Mary
269
00:10:44,870 --> 00:10:47,170
just about anywhere in town.
Isn't that right?
270
00:10:47,170 --> 00:10:49,870
Cheers never made
a Bloody Mary this good.
271
00:10:49,870 --> 00:10:53,470
If you say so,
Sam Malone of Cheers.
272
00:10:54,670 --> 00:10:56,670
Anybody know
the way to Gary's?
273
00:10:56,670 --> 00:10:58,070
I'll give you a lift.
274
00:10:58,070 --> 00:11:01,670
I can't believe
that weasel filmed us!
275
00:11:01,770 --> 00:11:04,170
Oh, that stunt tears it.
Now I'm mad.
276
00:11:04,170 --> 00:11:05,570
Yeah, I can tell.
How?
277
00:11:05,570 --> 00:11:07,970
That little vein
bulging in my forehead?
278
00:11:08,070 --> 00:11:08,970
No.
279
00:11:09,070 --> 00:11:10,570
My nostrils flaring?
280
00:11:10,570 --> 00:11:11,570
No.
281
00:11:11,570 --> 00:11:12,670
My jaw is clenched?
282
00:11:12,770 --> 00:11:14,070
No.
283
00:11:14,070 --> 00:11:15,370
Well, then,
how can you tell?
284
00:11:15,470 --> 00:11:17,270
You just said,
"Now I'm mad."
285
00:11:19,070 --> 00:11:20,670
Yeah, well, now I'm really mad.
286
00:11:20,770 --> 00:11:22,570
Yeah, I can tell.
How?
287
00:11:23,870 --> 00:11:26,670
I'll tell you something.
This is war. This is total war.
288
00:11:26,670 --> 00:11:29,070
No prisoners, no truce,
no amnesty, no nothing.
289
00:11:29,070 --> 00:11:31,670
Only one of us is going
to walk out of there standing.
290
00:11:31,770 --> 00:11:33,070
Well, what are you
going to do, Sam?
291
00:11:33,070 --> 00:11:34,270
Well, for one,
to really mess him up,
292
00:11:34,370 --> 00:11:35,770
we're going to have
to infiltrate his bar.
293
00:11:35,770 --> 00:11:37,670
- Yeah.
- Oh, let me do it, Sam.
294
00:11:37,770 --> 00:11:39,170
Please. Let me do it.
295
00:11:39,170 --> 00:11:41,070
You know, I've taken
a lot of makeup classes.
296
00:11:41,070 --> 00:11:42,470
I can... I can
put on a disguise
297
00:11:42,470 --> 00:11:44,570
and get in there without
anyone knowing about it.
298
00:11:44,670 --> 00:11:45,970
Woody, I don't think so.
299
00:11:45,970 --> 00:11:47,370
Oh, come on.
Let me do it.
300
00:11:47,470 --> 00:11:48,970
I feel responsible.
301
00:11:49,070 --> 00:11:50,470
I'm the one who
blew away the spice.
302
00:11:50,470 --> 00:11:52,070
I'm the one
who broke the jar.
303
00:11:52,070 --> 00:11:53,870
I'm the one who broke
the door in the men's room.
304
00:11:53,870 --> 00:11:54,870
What?
305
00:11:54,870 --> 00:11:56,870
At the bus station
downtown.
306
00:11:56,870 --> 00:11:58,770
Come on. Let me
make it up to you.
307
00:11:58,770 --> 00:11:59,970
Woody, you just...
you don't know
308
00:11:59,970 --> 00:12:01,170
what you're getting
yourself into.
309
00:12:01,270 --> 00:12:03,370
I mean, those guys
at Gary's are vicious.
310
00:12:03,370 --> 00:12:04,770
They could
strip you naked,
311
00:12:04,870 --> 00:12:06,870
paint you red and
put you on a subway.
312
00:12:06,870 --> 00:12:07,970
They wouldn't do that.
313
00:12:07,970 --> 00:12:09,270
They did it to me.
314
00:12:10,970 --> 00:12:12,270
But I got
the best of 'em.
315
00:12:12,370 --> 00:12:12,970
How's that?
316
00:12:12,970 --> 00:12:15,570
I loved it.
317
00:12:16,570 --> 00:12:18,270
Wait a minute, Woody,
come here, come here.
318
00:12:18,370 --> 00:12:19,770
Woody, Woody, Woody,
319
00:12:19,770 --> 00:12:21,270
I've got a plan.
Listen up.
320
00:12:21,370 --> 00:12:22,470
Shh!
321
00:12:22,470 --> 00:12:24,770
Gary had a camera in here
the other day.
322
00:12:24,870 --> 00:12:27,270
He could have a spy
in here now.
323
00:12:27,270 --> 00:12:29,870
And the whole place
could be bugged.
324
00:12:31,770 --> 00:12:32,970
Come on, you guys.
325
00:12:32,970 --> 00:12:34,570
Whoa, whoa.
326
00:12:34,670 --> 00:12:36,470
Don't take off in a clump
like that.
327
00:12:36,470 --> 00:12:37,470
It'll look suspicious.
328
00:12:37,470 --> 00:12:39,570
Everybody split up.
329
00:12:39,570 --> 00:12:40,770
We'll hook up outside.
330
00:12:58,170 --> 00:12:59,070
No, no, no!
331
00:12:59,170 --> 00:13:00,170
You're clumping up again.
332
00:13:00,170 --> 00:13:01,770
Spread out.
333
00:13:13,570 --> 00:13:15,170
No, you're clumping up again.
334
00:13:19,370 --> 00:13:21,370
Cliffie, you got
the time, pal?
335
00:13:21,370 --> 00:13:23,370
Right, time check.
336
00:13:23,370 --> 00:13:24,770
2200 Zulu.
337
00:13:26,170 --> 00:13:27,670
Agent Hoosier is overdue.
338
00:13:27,670 --> 00:13:29,470
Abort Operation Red Dawn.
339
00:13:29,570 --> 00:13:30,970
Cliff...
340
00:13:30,970 --> 00:13:34,770
What in God's name
are you talking about?
341
00:13:34,770 --> 00:13:36,270
Spy lingo, Norm.
342
00:13:36,370 --> 00:13:38,570
Woody's not back
from Gary's yet.
343
00:13:38,570 --> 00:13:40,870
It's time to mobilize
our forces. Let's go.
344
00:13:40,870 --> 00:13:43,170
I'm just the man for it.
345
00:13:43,170 --> 00:13:45,670
Actually, I considered a career
as a spy when I was young,
346
00:13:45,770 --> 00:13:48,370
but in the end, I decided
not to go into intelligence.
347
00:13:48,370 --> 00:13:49,870
That seems only fair.
348
00:13:49,870 --> 00:13:51,470
None of it went into you.
349
00:13:53,270 --> 00:13:54,970
Hey, guys, guys, guys.
What's the big rush here?
350
00:13:54,970 --> 00:13:55,970
Give him a chance.
351
00:13:56,070 --> 00:13:57,570
He's only about
five minutes late.
352
00:13:57,570 --> 00:13:59,870
Actually, I think we might be
underestimating Woody.
353
00:13:59,970 --> 00:14:01,170
You know, something tells me
354
00:14:01,170 --> 00:14:02,970
he might actually
pull this thing off.
355
00:14:03,070 --> 00:14:05,470
Hey! Hey!
356
00:14:08,070 --> 00:14:09,170
Wait, there's a note.
357
00:14:09,170 --> 00:14:10,170
What's it say?
358
00:14:11,170 --> 00:14:13,170
"Compliments of Gary's.
We deliver."
359
00:14:15,270 --> 00:14:16,170
What?
360
00:14:16,270 --> 00:14:18,070
What are you
trying to say?
361
00:14:18,070 --> 00:14:19,270
He's trying to say
something.
362
00:14:19,370 --> 00:14:22,170
What are you...?
Don't rip off the tape!
363
00:14:22,170 --> 00:14:23,970
Ahh!
364
00:14:35,474 --> 00:14:37,874
That's it, Cornmeal.
You blew it.
365
00:14:37,874 --> 00:14:40,074
I'm telling you,
I was doing fine.
366
00:14:40,074 --> 00:14:43,074
I borrowed this great costume
from my theater group.
367
00:14:43,074 --> 00:14:44,974
I really looked
like a nun.
368
00:14:45,074 --> 00:14:46,574
I went in there...
369
00:14:46,574 --> 00:14:47,574
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
370
00:14:47,674 --> 00:14:50,374
You dressed up as a nun
and went into a bar?
371
00:14:50,474 --> 00:14:51,474
Well,
it was either that
372
00:14:51,474 --> 00:14:53,274
or one of
the von Trapp children.
373
00:14:55,874 --> 00:14:59,674
This is the stupidest thing
I have ever heard of.
374
00:14:59,774 --> 00:15:02,774
Hey, I don't see
anybody else volunteering
375
00:15:02,774 --> 00:15:04,674
to go over there
and get roughed up
376
00:15:04,674 --> 00:15:05,574
and hung by their heels.
377
00:15:05,574 --> 00:15:06,974
I did it 'cause
I was trying to help.
378
00:15:06,974 --> 00:15:08,574
Okay, you were trying to help.
379
00:15:08,574 --> 00:15:10,574
Why'd you have to be
so stupid about it?
380
00:15:10,574 --> 00:15:11,474
And that's another thing.
381
00:15:11,574 --> 00:15:13,374
I'm sick and tired
of hearing that word.
382
00:15:13,374 --> 00:15:14,774
Stupid, stupid, stupid.
383
00:15:14,874 --> 00:15:16,174
If I hear that word
one more time,
384
00:15:16,274 --> 00:15:18,174
I'm walking out of here
and never coming back.
385
00:15:18,174 --> 00:15:19,474
Oh, come on, man.
That's stupid.
386
00:15:19,574 --> 00:15:20,474
That's it, I quit.
387
00:15:20,574 --> 00:15:21,674
Cool down.
388
00:15:21,674 --> 00:15:22,574
No, no, I'm serious.
389
00:15:22,674 --> 00:15:23,974
I've had it with this place.
390
00:15:24,074 --> 00:15:25,674
I'm not appreciated here
anymore.
391
00:15:25,674 --> 00:15:27,974
Oh, Woody, come on, man.
That's not true.
392
00:15:28,074 --> 00:15:29,674
Leave me alone!
393
00:15:40,974 --> 00:15:42,474
Well, look who's back.
394
00:15:42,474 --> 00:15:44,274
Sister Mary Woody.
395
00:15:46,774 --> 00:15:48,274
I'm looking for a job.
396
00:15:48,374 --> 00:15:49,874
Oh, right.
397
00:15:49,874 --> 00:15:51,374
I heard you quit Cheers.
398
00:15:51,374 --> 00:15:54,774
I'm never going back
into Cheers again.
399
00:15:54,774 --> 00:15:57,774
Well, except to get
my last check and, uh,
400
00:15:57,774 --> 00:15:59,974
the only key to my apartment.
401
00:16:00,074 --> 00:16:01,874
So where'd you stay last night?
402
00:16:01,874 --> 00:16:03,774
Well, I just walked around.
403
00:16:03,774 --> 00:16:05,574
Down to the Commons,
404
00:16:05,574 --> 00:16:07,074
over to the river,
405
00:16:07,074 --> 00:16:09,174
across the river
to Cambridge,
406
00:16:09,274 --> 00:16:10,674
back over the river,
407
00:16:10,774 --> 00:16:13,574
took a right at the
Prudential building,
408
00:16:13,574 --> 00:16:15,674
stopped at a newsstand,
409
00:16:15,674 --> 00:16:17,674
thought about buying a paper,
didn't...
410
00:16:17,674 --> 00:16:19,574
Okay, okay, okay.
411
00:16:19,574 --> 00:16:21,074
I get it.
412
00:16:21,074 --> 00:16:23,874
So you're coming to me
for a job?
413
00:16:23,974 --> 00:16:26,274
I don't owe Cheers diddly.
414
00:16:26,374 --> 00:16:29,074
Well, you're
a darned good barkeep.
415
00:16:29,074 --> 00:16:30,674
And I could use
an extra hand.
416
00:16:30,674 --> 00:16:32,274
There's always
an upsurge of business
417
00:16:32,274 --> 00:16:34,674
every year after I win
the Bloody Mary contest.
418
00:16:36,074 --> 00:16:36,674
Why not?
419
00:16:36,674 --> 00:16:38,574
Grab an apron
in the back.
420
00:16:38,674 --> 00:16:39,674
Oh, gee,
421
00:16:39,674 --> 00:16:41,374
you won't regret this.
422
00:16:41,374 --> 00:16:42,474
Wait till
423
00:16:42,474 --> 00:16:45,174
I tell my mom I'm working
for that weasel Gary.
424
00:16:48,174 --> 00:16:49,874
Are you crazy?
He's the enemy.
425
00:16:49,974 --> 00:16:51,474
No, I think he's okay.
426
00:16:51,474 --> 00:16:52,974
I was in Cheers
when he quit.
427
00:16:52,974 --> 00:16:54,174
It was real ugly.
428
00:16:54,274 --> 00:16:56,874
I don't know. Uh, you
think we can trust him?
429
00:16:56,974 --> 00:16:57,874
Gary?
Well...
430
00:16:57,974 --> 00:16:59,174
Yeah?
431
00:16:59,274 --> 00:17:01,174
I found a nickel in
the pocket of this apron.
432
00:17:01,274 --> 00:17:03,674
You know who it belongs to
or should I put up a flyer?
433
00:17:03,674 --> 00:17:05,974
I think we can trust him.
434
00:17:11,774 --> 00:17:13,074
Afternoon, everybody.
435
00:17:13,074 --> 00:17:14,174
Hey, hey, Gary.
436
00:17:14,274 --> 00:17:15,974
Well, this is it!
437
00:17:15,974 --> 00:17:18,374
The day of the big contest.
438
00:17:18,374 --> 00:17:19,674
Hey, Woody, come here.
439
00:17:19,774 --> 00:17:22,074
Yes, sir.
440
00:17:22,074 --> 00:17:23,974
Woody, I'm gonna
be honest with you.
441
00:17:23,974 --> 00:17:26,674
I had my doubts about you
having worked at Cheers and all,
442
00:17:26,774 --> 00:17:29,774
but after the way you've worked
out here this last week...
443
00:17:29,874 --> 00:17:31,674
you're really one of us now.
444
00:17:31,674 --> 00:17:33,174
Thank you.
445
00:17:33,174 --> 00:17:35,674
By the way, here.
446
00:17:35,774 --> 00:17:36,874
What is it?
447
00:17:36,974 --> 00:17:38,274
It came for you a few days ago.
448
00:17:38,374 --> 00:17:39,574
I forgot to give it to you.
449
00:17:40,974 --> 00:17:42,774
"This is to inform you
that the contest
450
00:17:42,874 --> 00:17:46,674
has been moved up
two hours to 12:00 noon."
451
00:17:46,674 --> 00:17:48,774
You forgot to give this to me?
452
00:17:48,774 --> 00:17:50,074
Is it important?
453
00:17:50,174 --> 00:17:54,674
Oh, wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
454
00:17:54,774 --> 00:17:56,474
Damn it, boy.
455
00:17:56,474 --> 00:17:58,274
You and Malone set me up.
456
00:17:58,374 --> 00:18:01,274
You knew about this
time change two days ago.
457
00:18:01,274 --> 00:18:03,174
Well, don't just stand there
like a bump on a log.
458
00:18:03,274 --> 00:18:04,674
Say something.
459
00:18:04,674 --> 00:18:06,774
Got you, Gar.
460
00:18:09,174 --> 00:18:11,874
That means the contest
started five minutes ago.
461
00:18:11,874 --> 00:18:13,674
Gee, boss,
462
00:18:13,774 --> 00:18:15,574
I don't think
you're gonna make it.
463
00:18:15,674 --> 00:18:17,774
I think you're gonna lose.
464
00:18:17,874 --> 00:18:20,374
I think you're gonna fall
flat on your face.
465
00:18:20,474 --> 00:18:22,474
I think...
466
00:18:22,474 --> 00:18:25,074
I'm gonna be hanging
upside down again.
467
00:18:26,874 --> 00:18:28,374
Get him!
Come on. Get him!
468
00:18:34,074 --> 00:18:37,774
Well, I wish I could
give all of you an award,
469
00:18:37,874 --> 00:18:39,274
but there can only
be one winner...
470
00:18:39,274 --> 00:18:40,574
Surprise, Malone.
471
00:18:40,574 --> 00:18:42,174
I made it.
Hey.
472
00:18:42,174 --> 00:18:44,174
No, he's disqualified.
He's late.
473
00:18:45,374 --> 00:18:46,574
You were late, man.
474
00:18:46,574 --> 00:18:48,574
I didn't get the message
about the time change.
475
00:18:48,574 --> 00:18:50,974
They tried to keep me away,
but it didn't work.
476
00:18:51,074 --> 00:18:52,074
Yeah, right!
It didn't work.
477
00:18:52,174 --> 00:18:53,874
That's a lie and you
should be disqualified
478
00:18:53,874 --> 00:18:55,074
for making a
slanderous remark
479
00:18:55,074 --> 00:18:57,374
and for wearing that
shirt with those pants.
480
00:19:01,874 --> 00:19:03,974
There's still time
for another entry.
481
00:19:03,974 --> 00:19:05,474
All right!
482
00:19:06,874 --> 00:19:07,974
Here.
483
00:19:08,074 --> 00:19:11,274
Try a real Bloody Mary.
484
00:19:17,074 --> 00:19:18,874
Hands down, the winner.
485
00:19:18,974 --> 00:19:20,074
All right!
486
00:19:20,174 --> 00:19:21,374
Olde Towne Tavern!
487
00:19:21,374 --> 00:19:22,874
Olde Towne Tavern!
488
00:19:22,874 --> 00:19:24,174
Olde Towne Tavern!
489
00:19:24,274 --> 00:19:25,674
Olde Towne Tavern!
490
00:19:25,774 --> 00:19:26,674
Hey!
491
00:19:26,774 --> 00:19:27,874
Hey, hey, Sam...
492
00:19:27,974 --> 00:19:29,974
here's a little bit
of advice for you:
493
00:19:29,974 --> 00:19:32,974
give up while you got
a shred of dignity left.
494
00:19:32,974 --> 00:19:34,374
Oops, too late.
495
00:19:40,974 --> 00:19:42,274
All clear?
496
00:19:42,274 --> 00:19:43,574
All clear.
497
00:19:49,874 --> 00:19:51,774
Oh, my man Woody!
498
00:19:51,874 --> 00:19:52,774
That's good, man.
499
00:19:52,874 --> 00:19:54,674
Take that makeup off.
500
00:20:00,074 --> 00:20:01,474
Well, now just a minute.
501
00:20:01,574 --> 00:20:03,474
That's Woody?
My God.
502
00:20:03,574 --> 00:20:04,874
This is amazing makeup.
503
00:20:04,974 --> 00:20:06,374
This is just incredible.
504
00:20:06,374 --> 00:20:08,874
This was part of
some elaborate ruse, huh?
505
00:20:08,874 --> 00:20:09,974
Yeah, we set
the whole thing up.
506
00:20:10,074 --> 00:20:12,274
Yeah, that way we can
get Gary out of here
507
00:20:12,274 --> 00:20:13,874
before the real contest starts.
508
00:20:13,874 --> 00:20:15,874
And when you made such a fool of
yourself pretending to be a nun?
509
00:20:15,874 --> 00:20:17,174
That was part
of the plan.
510
00:20:17,174 --> 00:20:19,274
When you went
to work for Gary?
Part of the plan.
511
00:20:19,374 --> 00:20:21,274
When you told Gary the time
of the contest had changed?
512
00:20:21,274 --> 00:20:22,574
All part of the plan.
513
00:20:22,574 --> 00:20:24,174
Hey, guys...
514
00:20:24,274 --> 00:20:26,674
I'm ready for the real contest.
515
00:20:26,674 --> 00:20:28,674
Not part of the plan.
516
00:20:34,774 --> 00:20:36,574
And the winner
of Boston's annual
517
00:20:36,574 --> 00:20:39,174
Bloody Mary contest is...
518
00:20:39,174 --> 00:20:41,274
Gary's Olde Towne Tavern!
519
00:20:41,274 --> 00:20:42,574
Yeah!
520
00:20:44,374 --> 00:20:47,074
Where have I heard that before?
521
00:20:47,074 --> 00:20:49,274
You know, Sam,
522
00:20:49,274 --> 00:20:51,874
that was a stroke of genius
having Li'l Abner there
523
00:20:51,974 --> 00:20:53,774
playing the judge.
524
00:20:53,774 --> 00:20:55,374
And I got to admit I fell for it
525
00:20:55,374 --> 00:20:57,874
until I got
within about 20 feet.
526
00:20:57,874 --> 00:20:59,674
Very funny.
527
00:20:59,674 --> 00:21:01,674
You know, we're gonna
get you next year, Gary,
528
00:21:01,774 --> 00:21:03,074
and it's not going
to be very pretty.
529
00:21:03,074 --> 00:21:04,074
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
530
00:21:04,074 --> 00:21:05,974
Oh, yeah?
Yeah.
531
00:21:05,974 --> 00:21:08,374
Don't try to outfox me
because you can't.
532
00:21:08,474 --> 00:21:10,274
Every time you think
you got me fooled,
533
00:21:10,274 --> 00:21:11,874
I'm one step ahead of you.
534
00:21:11,874 --> 00:21:14,874
But I got to admit,
this time you came...
535
00:21:14,874 --> 00:21:16,074
that close.
536
00:21:17,274 --> 00:21:18,674
Very funny.
Very funny.
537
00:21:20,474 --> 00:21:23,274
I can't believe he did it again.
538
00:21:23,274 --> 00:21:26,374
Uh, 45... 50.
539
00:21:26,374 --> 00:21:27,774
Carla, what are you doing?
540
00:21:27,774 --> 00:21:31,474
I mean, you usually pay off
a judge after you win a contest.
541
00:21:31,574 --> 00:21:33,174
If the contest that
had just happened
542
00:21:33,174 --> 00:21:35,274
were the real contest--
which it wasn't--
543
00:21:35,274 --> 00:21:37,474
and if this guy
were the real judge,
544
00:21:37,474 --> 00:21:38,474
which he's not.
545
00:21:38,574 --> 00:21:41,674
You follow any of that?
546
00:21:41,674 --> 00:21:43,574
This is my next-
door neighbor.
547
00:21:43,574 --> 00:21:45,774
The real judge is some
old lady from Cambridge.
548
00:21:45,774 --> 00:21:47,274
Thanks for helping
out, Larry.
549
00:21:47,374 --> 00:21:49,274
Any time, Carla.
550
00:21:51,174 --> 00:21:52,374
Wait a minute.
551
00:21:52,374 --> 00:21:55,174
If this wasn't the real contest,
when is the real contest?
552
00:21:55,274 --> 00:21:56,974
In about a half an hour.
553
00:21:56,974 --> 00:21:58,674
Are you telling me
we still have a chance
554
00:21:58,674 --> 00:21:59,874
to win this thing?
We sure do!
555
00:22:01,474 --> 00:22:03,574
Carla! Carla!
556
00:22:03,574 --> 00:22:07,474
Carla! Carla! Carla! Carla!
557
00:22:07,474 --> 00:22:09,174
Carla! Carla!
558
00:22:09,274 --> 00:22:10,374
Carla...
559
00:22:10,374 --> 00:22:11,774
How long have you
had this planned?
560
00:22:11,774 --> 00:22:13,374
Since about...
561
00:22:13,474 --> 00:22:15,674
a minute after we lost
last year's contest.
562
00:22:15,674 --> 00:22:17,474
This is unbelievable.
What?!
563
00:22:17,574 --> 00:22:19,374
That I could come up
with a great plan?
564
00:22:19,374 --> 00:22:20,574
No, that you'd pay
this guy money
565
00:22:20,674 --> 00:22:21,674
out of your own pocket.
566
00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:23,274
Get real.
567
00:22:23,374 --> 00:22:26,174
I lifted Gary's wallet
when he was leaving the bar.
568
00:22:29,574 --> 00:22:33,874
Thank God you are on our side.
569
00:22:33,874 --> 00:22:36,874
And from here on in,
whether we win or lose,
570
00:22:36,974 --> 00:22:38,674
what's really important
to remember--
571
00:22:38,774 --> 00:22:39,474
and I'm saying this
572
00:22:39,574 --> 00:22:42,074
in the spirit of true sportsmen
everywhere--
573
00:22:42,074 --> 00:22:43,774
is Gary won't win!
574
00:22:43,774 --> 00:22:46,074
Yeah!
Gary won't win!
575
00:22:46,074 --> 00:22:47,674
Gary won't win!
576
00:22:47,674 --> 00:22:48,874
Gary won't win!
577
00:22:48,874 --> 00:22:50,074
Hey, guys...
578
00:22:50,174 --> 00:22:51,974
I am on to you.
579
00:22:53,374 --> 00:22:56,574
Oh, man, I give up.
580
00:22:56,574 --> 00:22:58,474
Now hand over my wallet.
581
00:23:00,274 --> 00:23:02,674
Your what?
582
00:23:02,674 --> 00:23:04,774
Come on.
Somebody took my wallet.
583
00:23:04,874 --> 00:23:06,574
Yeah, someone
handed it in.
584
00:23:06,674 --> 00:23:07,674
You must've dropped it
585
00:23:07,674 --> 00:23:08,874
when you were
leaving the bar.
586
00:23:08,974 --> 00:23:11,274
Yeah, yeah. Thanks.
587
00:23:11,274 --> 00:23:13,374
So long, chumps.
588
00:23:18,174 --> 00:23:19,974
Gary won't win.
589
00:23:19,974 --> 00:23:21,774
Gary won't win.
590
00:23:21,874 --> 00:23:23,574
Gary won't win.