1 00:02:17,095 --> 00:02:19,197 MAN: Watch your step. 2 00:02:20,557 --> 00:02:22,785 WOMAN 1 (OVER PA): All Pulsar 4 mining personnel... 3 00:02:22,851 --> 00:02:26,922 report to the Resource Expedition office, Level 7. 4 00:02:36,865 --> 00:02:41,311 (INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE) 5 00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:45,265 (GATE BUZZES) 6 00:02:46,833 --> 00:02:48,401 (GATE DINGS) 7 00:02:50,337 --> 00:02:51,859 (GATE BUZZES) 8 00:02:54,591 --> 00:02:56,034 (GATE DINGS TWICE) 9 00:02:58,136 --> 00:02:59,829 (PEOPLE CHATTERING) 10 00:02:59,888 --> 00:03:02,286 WOMAN: Not on a four-hour layover. 11 00:03:11,817 --> 00:03:13,885 OPERATOR (OVER PHONE): Operator. Can I help you? 12 00:03:13,944 --> 00:03:17,548 ALIEN: Phone home. Phone home. 13 00:03:17,614 --> 00:03:21,890 OPERATOR: Please deposit $6 million for the first 3 minutes. 14 00:03:23,537 --> 00:03:25,184 WOMAN (OVER PA): All lunar passengers... 15 00:03:25,247 --> 00:03:28,226 please check with Passenger Processing, Level 3. 16 00:03:28,291 --> 00:03:29,768 - DAD: That's us. - MOM: Mm-hm. 17 00:03:29,835 --> 00:03:31,778 Will Scraps be able to sit with us, Dad? 18 00:03:31,837 --> 00:03:34,941 We'll have to check, Jimmy. It's a pretty long trip to the moon. 19 00:03:35,006 --> 00:03:37,859 - Hi, there. Can I help you folks? - Thanks. 20 00:03:37,926 --> 00:03:40,028 Oh. Is that your puppy, son? 21 00:03:40,095 --> 00:03:42,539 Yeah. His name's Scraps and he's going to the moon with us. 22 00:03:42,597 --> 00:03:43,744 (PARENTS CHUCKLE) 23 00:03:43,807 --> 00:03:45,750 Oh, no. No dogs are allowed on the shuttle, son. 24 00:03:45,809 --> 00:03:48,378 I'm afraid Scraps will have to be shot. 25 00:03:50,272 --> 00:03:51,965 Scraps! 26 00:03:52,023 --> 00:03:54,717 He shot him! He shot Scraps! 27 00:03:54,776 --> 00:03:59,052 Just joking! Blanks. See? Scraps is fine. 28 00:03:59,114 --> 00:04:00,591 (LAUGHING) 29 00:04:02,617 --> 00:04:04,890 I says, "Whenever you're in town, just call me." 30 00:04:05,787 --> 00:04:08,515 Dinner in first class tonight will be bean sprouts and broccoli. 31 00:04:08,582 --> 00:04:11,151 - Fine. - Will that be chanting or non-chanting? 32 00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:13,437 Chanting, please. 33 00:04:16,214 --> 00:04:20,785 Don't worry about the Viatex account. We have a buy-or-sell option. We can't get hurt. 34 00:04:20,844 --> 00:04:24,369 - Just keep on top of their legal people, Bob. - Will do. 35 00:04:25,140 --> 00:04:28,619 - And, Bob, feed the cats. - Will do. 36 00:04:36,067 --> 00:04:38,169 I'm sorry, ma'am, you're only allowed one carry-on. 37 00:04:38,236 --> 00:04:39,383 (BABY COOING) 38 00:04:39,446 --> 00:04:42,220 Oh. All right. 39 00:04:44,534 --> 00:04:46,136 Bye-bye. Thank you. 40 00:04:46,203 --> 00:04:47,896 (BABY CRYING) 41 00:04:53,001 --> 00:04:55,524 For the best computer officer on the lunar mission. 42 00:04:55,587 --> 00:04:59,408 Simon, you shouldn't have! I guess I'm a pretty lucky woman, aren't I? 43 00:04:59,466 --> 00:05:02,194 Women and the space program have come a long way... 44 00:05:02,260 --> 00:05:05,489 but after the wedding, no more complicated computers for my girl. 45 00:05:05,555 --> 00:05:09,751 But, darling, they've offered me a chance to head up the Computer Analysis division. 46 00:05:09,810 --> 00:05:13,756 You're gonna head up the division in charge of babies for Mr. and Mrs. Simon Kurtz. 47 00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:15,916 That's an order, lieutenant. Come on. 48 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:20,925 Where's the passenger processing lounge for the lunar shuttle? 49 00:05:20,987 --> 00:05:23,590 - Concourse lounge C, fourth level. - Thanks. 50 00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:26,260 - Next. - How long is my parking permit good for? 51 00:05:26,326 --> 00:05:27,473 - Two hours. - Thank you. 52 00:05:27,536 --> 00:05:28,683 Yes, next? 53 00:05:28,745 --> 00:05:31,724 - What's the fastest animal on earth? - The cheetah. Next? 54 00:05:31,790 --> 00:05:34,609 - Should I fake my orgasms? - Yes. 55 00:05:34,668 --> 00:05:36,020 - Thank you. - Next. 56 00:05:37,796 --> 00:05:40,069 (SUITCASES BARKING) 57 00:05:48,723 --> 00:05:50,541 (CHATTERING) 58 00:05:52,018 --> 00:05:53,244 This is Mission Control. 59 00:05:53,311 --> 00:05:56,255 We have clearance on two-niner for shuttle pre-launch checks. 60 00:05:56,314 --> 00:06:00,544 Trans Delta 6, you are clear to descend to 15,000 and hold until further notice. 61 00:06:00,610 --> 00:06:03,088 There's a high-pressure front moving in over Denver. 62 00:06:03,154 --> 00:06:05,882 A low of 56 in the valley, a high of 72 at the beaches. 63 00:06:05,949 --> 00:06:09,474 The Supremes hit the top of the charts with this one in the '60s, "Baby Love". 64 00:06:09,536 --> 00:06:11,354 (THE SUPREMES' "BABY LOVE" PLAYING ON RADIO) 65 00:06:11,413 --> 00:06:14,687 I have a collect call for a Michael Reese from his mother. Do you accept charges? 66 00:06:15,083 --> 00:06:18,653 This is only part of our mission control. 67 00:06:18,712 --> 00:06:22,533 Right here we have re-entry for all Earth-orbit ships. 68 00:06:22,591 --> 00:06:27,288 That's handled by the computers and simulated by these video units. 69 00:06:27,345 --> 00:06:29,072 Now, if you'll step this way... 70 00:06:29,139 --> 00:06:33,915 Phoenix 6, you're programmed on R two-niner and computer locked. 71 00:06:34,019 --> 00:06:38,124 Computer lock acknowledged. Over and out. 72 00:06:39,858 --> 00:06:43,337 Well, gentlemen, looks like it's out of our hands now. 73 00:06:43,403 --> 00:06:45,847 - MAN: Janet, they need you in control. - Right. 74 00:06:54,539 --> 00:06:56,061 (COMPUTER BEEPING) 75 00:07:12,057 --> 00:07:13,579 BOY: Ah, shit. 76 00:07:13,642 --> 00:07:15,289 (SIREN WAILING) 77 00:07:15,352 --> 00:07:17,079 (PEOPLE CLAMORING) 78 00:07:26,363 --> 00:07:30,263 Commissioner, we both know that shuttle needs another month of pre-launch testing. 79 00:07:30,325 --> 00:07:32,302 Forget it, Bud. 80 00:07:32,702 --> 00:07:35,351 - BUD: But Commissioner... - I said, forget about it. 81 00:07:35,413 --> 00:07:38,892 Mayflower is the first lunar shuttle to fly from a commercial terminal... 82 00:07:38,959 --> 00:07:41,608 and the boys on the board want that flight to go on schedule. 83 00:07:41,670 --> 00:07:43,943 What do the boys on the board know about safety? 84 00:07:44,005 --> 00:07:45,778 Get wise to the political realities. 85 00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:48,989 The boys on the board are under heavy pressure from the boys downtown. 86 00:07:49,052 --> 00:07:52,326 (DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING LOUDLY OVER ELEVATOR SPEAKERS) 87 00:08:02,399 --> 00:08:04,422 Pressure from the boys downtown. A lot. 88 00:08:04,484 --> 00:08:08,509 And I'll be the one they crucify if that shuttle screws up. 89 00:08:09,906 --> 00:08:11,883 (GATE BUZZING) 90 00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:15,099 (GATE RINGS) 91 00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:17,263 - Not so fast. Frisk her! - Okay. 92 00:08:18,415 --> 00:08:22,895 These navigational charts seem okay. I don't think there'll be any problem. 93 00:08:22,961 --> 00:08:26,907 - Hey, why the long face? - I'm still worried about the shuttle. 94 00:08:26,965 --> 00:08:30,535 You saw Ted's report, and he is the program's top test pilot. 95 00:08:30,593 --> 00:08:34,072 Was the program's top test pilot until his mental breakdown. 96 00:08:34,889 --> 00:08:39,369 Sweetheart, the opinion of a madman doesn't impress me or anyone else in the program. 97 00:08:39,436 --> 00:08:43,541 The trial proved that. Ted Striker's part of your past. 98 00:08:45,900 --> 00:08:49,300 - JOAN: Marcia? - MARCIA: Joan. 99 00:08:49,362 --> 00:08:51,840 (WOLF HOWLING IN DISTANCE) 100 00:08:54,409 --> 00:08:56,853 (MAN GRUNTING AND YELLING) 101 00:08:56,911 --> 00:08:59,810 ORDERLY: It's for your own good. It's for your own good. 102 00:09:01,916 --> 00:09:03,757 - Please, may I have this bedpan? - MAN: Mm-hm. 103 00:09:03,793 --> 00:09:06,271 I have to give it to somebody else. I'll bring it right back. 104 00:09:06,337 --> 00:09:07,563 MAN: Mm-mm. 105 00:09:07,630 --> 00:09:10,199 - Please, Mr. Goldberg! - Mm! 106 00:09:10,258 --> 00:09:12,326 So the company's doing pretty well. 107 00:09:12,385 --> 00:09:17,241 The figures for the last quarter show a 40 percent increase over the last year. 108 00:09:17,307 --> 00:09:19,501 Visiting hours are over. 109 00:09:20,101 --> 00:09:23,671 Doctor, do you think my brother will be able to come home to the farm soon? 110 00:09:23,730 --> 00:09:27,334 It's hard to say. It's a difficult case. He still thinks he's an accountant. 111 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:28,547 Thank you. 112 00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:31,463 You must believe me. Invest in money markets! 113 00:09:41,247 --> 00:09:43,441 And how are we this evening, Ted? 114 00:09:44,626 --> 00:09:47,024 All right, I guess. 115 00:09:47,087 --> 00:09:50,987 You can take off now. We'll finish up tomorrow. 116 00:09:51,633 --> 00:09:55,203 - I thought you might like a paper. - Thanks. 117 00:09:57,430 --> 00:10:00,409 - TED: My God! - What's wrong? 118 00:10:00,475 --> 00:10:03,499 They're launching the XR-2300! Know what that is, doctor? 119 00:10:03,561 --> 00:10:05,629 The muffler bracket for a '79 Pinto? 120 00:10:05,688 --> 00:10:10,214 No. That's the XR-2200. The 2300 is the lunar shuttle. 121 00:10:10,276 --> 00:10:13,300 It's got to be stopped! Don't you understand? 122 00:10:13,363 --> 00:10:15,557 They put me in here to keep me out of the way. 123 00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:20,186 You must understand the first step on the road to mental hygiene is admitting you're sick. 124 00:10:20,245 --> 00:10:23,724 (ECHOING) You're sick, you're sick, you're sick, you're sick, you're sick. 125 00:10:24,457 --> 00:10:27,185 Now, listen, Ted. Our only concern is your condition. 126 00:10:27,252 --> 00:10:30,606 Your alpha scan reading seems to be leveling off. 127 00:10:30,672 --> 00:10:34,697 - Is that a good sign? - Heh, it does the job. 128 00:10:34,759 --> 00:10:39,205 I can't stand it! I refuse to pay $2,000 a day... 129 00:10:39,264 --> 00:10:42,493 for a hospital bed, rotten food, horrible nurses, rotten doctors! 130 00:10:42,559 --> 00:10:46,334 - What's his problem? - The man's obviously crazy. 131 00:10:46,396 --> 00:10:49,215 And by the way, I spoke to Elaine this morning. 132 00:10:49,274 --> 00:10:52,469 Elaine? Was she here? 133 00:10:52,527 --> 00:10:55,346 No. She called me and asked me to tell you that she's marrying Simon. 134 00:10:56,531 --> 00:10:57,723 (CHUCKLES) 135 00:10:57,782 --> 00:11:00,476 Why don't you tell me the whole story from the beginning. 136 00:11:00,535 --> 00:11:02,387 After all, that's why I'm here. 137 00:11:02,453 --> 00:11:03,850 (TED SIGHS) 138 00:11:03,913 --> 00:11:06,516 There's really nothing to tell. 139 00:11:06,583 --> 00:11:09,653 My story is no different than anyone else's story. 140 00:11:09,711 --> 00:11:12,030 I'm sure you've heard it a thousand times. 141 00:11:12,088 --> 00:11:17,240 Anyway, it all started during the war. I lost most of my squadron over Macho Grande. 142 00:11:18,845 --> 00:11:20,993 Planes too. 143 00:11:21,055 --> 00:11:22,281 (PLANES BUZZING AND GUNFIRE) 144 00:11:22,348 --> 00:11:25,497 MAN (OVER RADIO): You're too low. Too low. 145 00:11:25,560 --> 00:11:29,915 After the war, I couldn't go near anything with a pair of wings. 146 00:11:29,981 --> 00:11:35,087 That is until fate dropped me in the seat of a 767 into Chicago with no crew. 147 00:11:36,029 --> 00:11:39,599 It's funny how fate can make heroes out of cowards. 148 00:11:41,117 --> 00:11:45,893 After that came the job offers, then the publicity... 149 00:11:47,207 --> 00:11:49,309 then the crash and the trial. 150 00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:50,772 Order! Order! 151 00:11:50,835 --> 00:11:52,778 Now this. 152 00:11:53,421 --> 00:11:58,118 Well, there's more, but I'm sure you'd all be bored by it. 153 00:12:00,094 --> 00:12:01,912 Oh, no, no, no. Continue. 154 00:12:01,971 --> 00:12:05,621 (GUNSHOTS THEN THUDDING) 155 00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:13,667 MAN (OVER PA): This is Mission Control. 156 00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:18,384 In T-minus one hour, 43 minutes, ground crew report to stations. 157 00:12:32,460 --> 00:12:34,278 (GASPS) 158 00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:37,823 This is Mayflower 1, get me the sarge! 159 00:12:39,592 --> 00:12:41,069 (TIRES SCREECH) 160 00:12:41,135 --> 00:12:43,488 Hey, Sarge! Hold up! 161 00:12:45,306 --> 00:12:47,329 Here it is. 162 00:12:47,392 --> 00:12:49,290 Give me that radio. 163 00:12:49,352 --> 00:12:51,796 Kruger, this is the sarge. 164 00:12:51,854 --> 00:12:55,709 There's no way this wire could have passed inspection without Simon Kurtz's okay. 165 00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:57,502 Now, what the hell's going on? 166 00:12:57,568 --> 00:13:00,717 Patch up the damage. Get that ship ready to fly. 167 00:13:00,780 --> 00:13:03,884 - That's an order, mister! - You got it, mister. 168 00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:08,430 But you can tell your boys on the board for me that this thing stinks of kickback. 169 00:13:09,914 --> 00:13:13,814 - You heard it, boys. Now, what do you say? - BOYS: Screw him! 170 00:13:13,876 --> 00:13:17,901 Ted Striker was right when he test-piloted that sucker. 171 00:13:19,257 --> 00:13:23,362 And what did he get for telling the truth? A one-way ticket to the funny farm! 172 00:13:25,847 --> 00:13:28,791 We don't have much time. Let's move. 173 00:13:32,270 --> 00:13:34,247 (SIREN WAILING) 174 00:13:47,035 --> 00:13:49,058 (DOGS BARKING NEARBY) 175 00:13:55,793 --> 00:13:58,316 (SINGING) The Love Boat 176 00:13:58,755 --> 00:14:03,156 Soon we'll be making another run 177 00:14:03,551 --> 00:14:05,073 The Love Boat 178 00:14:14,729 --> 00:14:16,081 WOMAN: Thank you. 179 00:14:18,149 --> 00:14:20,343 (BOTH SPEAK IN JAPANESE) 180 00:14:25,031 --> 00:14:29,386 - CLERK: May I help you? - Yes. I'd like this, uh, Time and Newsweek. 181 00:14:29,452 --> 00:14:35,059 And a Lifesaver and, um, the second time bomb on the right, please. 182 00:14:35,124 --> 00:14:36,726 Certainly. 183 00:14:40,963 --> 00:14:42,440 - There you are. - Thank you. 184 00:14:42,507 --> 00:14:45,281 - Will there be anything else, sir? - No. 185 00:14:58,648 --> 00:15:00,671 (BRAKES SQUEAK) 186 00:15:03,569 --> 00:15:04,886 (CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS) 187 00:15:13,621 --> 00:15:15,723 Hi, Grandma Rudy! 188 00:15:19,710 --> 00:15:22,404 Good to see you! 189 00:15:25,633 --> 00:15:29,488 - Just a few more hours till lift-off. - I'm very excited, Simon. 190 00:15:29,554 --> 00:15:33,079 - Guess this is a first for you. - No. I've been excited before. 191 00:15:33,141 --> 00:15:36,541 - TED: Elaine! - Ted, what are you doing out of the hospital? 192 00:15:36,602 --> 00:15:40,002 - There's no time. Are you on that shuttle? - Both of us, Striker. 193 00:15:40,064 --> 00:15:42,838 And when we return, we're getting married. 194 00:15:42,900 --> 00:15:46,800 - Elaine, it has to be stopped. - But, Ted, the invitations have gone out. 195 00:15:46,904 --> 00:15:49,098 No, I mean, the flight has to be stopped. 196 00:15:49,157 --> 00:15:50,304 Come on, sweetheart. 197 00:15:51,534 --> 00:15:52,977 Elaine. 198 00:15:53,911 --> 00:15:56,389 Simon, give me a moment with Ted alone. 199 00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:59,059 All right. You've got exactly 10 minutes till we board. 200 00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:03,025 And, Striker, I'd watch my step if I were you. 201 00:16:04,547 --> 00:16:07,116 Ted, this whole thing's all in your mind. 202 00:16:07,175 --> 00:16:10,154 (SIMON YELLS) (THUDDING AND CLATTERING) 203 00:16:10,761 --> 00:16:14,707 - You should've never left the hospital. - Elaine, whatever happened to us? 204 00:16:14,765 --> 00:16:18,085 Ted, I guess I'll always love you, but I need Simon. 205 00:16:18,144 --> 00:16:23,341 He's stable and a good provider, and I need that at this stage of the game. 206 00:16:23,399 --> 00:16:25,501 He doesn't run away from every challenge. 207 00:16:25,568 --> 00:16:29,172 He doesn't let every little setback eat him up inside. 208 00:16:29,238 --> 00:16:31,591 Now, goodbye, Ted. 209 00:16:41,501 --> 00:16:44,980 Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet your captain. Captain Oveur. 210 00:16:45,046 --> 00:16:46,489 Gentlemen, welcome aboard. 211 00:16:46,547 --> 00:16:49,867 Your navigator, Mr. Unger and your first officer, Mr. Dunn. 212 00:16:49,926 --> 00:16:51,073 - Unger. - Oveur. 213 00:16:51,135 --> 00:16:52,703 - Oveur. - Dunn. 214 00:16:52,762 --> 00:16:54,705 Gentlemen, let's get to work. 215 00:16:56,182 --> 00:16:58,705 Unger, didn't you serve under Oveur in the Air Force? 216 00:16:58,768 --> 00:17:02,088 Uh, not directly. Technically, Dunn was under Oveur, and I was under Dunn. 217 00:17:02,146 --> 00:17:03,293 Yep. 218 00:17:03,356 --> 00:17:05,879 So, Dunn, you were under Oveur and over Unger. 219 00:17:05,942 --> 00:17:07,259 Yep. 220 00:17:07,360 --> 00:17:10,885 Uh, that's right. Dunn was over Unger, and I was over Dunn. 221 00:17:10,947 --> 00:17:14,472 See? Both Dunn and I were under Oveur, even though I was under Dunn. 222 00:17:15,660 --> 00:17:19,014 Dunn was over Unger, and I was over Dunn. 223 00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:22,233 Do you have any tickets for the lunar shuttle? 224 00:17:22,291 --> 00:17:25,736 There haven't been any available seats for weeks now, sir. 225 00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:28,527 SCALPER: What you want? I got pairs, I got singles! 226 00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:30,987 Check them out, y'all, $400 lunar shuttle tickets. 227 00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:33,778 Check them out. Lunar shuttle. Smoking... What you want? 228 00:17:33,844 --> 00:17:36,288 - What have you got? - Lunar shuttle tickets, $400. 229 00:17:36,347 --> 00:17:39,826 I got smoking, non-smoking, first class, coach, economy... 230 00:17:39,892 --> 00:17:42,290 by the aisle, by the window. 231 00:17:42,353 --> 00:17:45,332 Take it easy, my man. Lunar shuttle tickets! 232 00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:47,421 - Hi. Thank you. - Hi. 233 00:17:47,608 --> 00:17:49,176 - Hello. - Hi. 234 00:17:49,235 --> 00:17:51,758 Three of you to the left. 235 00:17:51,821 --> 00:17:54,424 - Hi. Can I take your case, please? - No. 236 00:17:54,490 --> 00:17:56,058 (CHATTERING) 237 00:17:56,117 --> 00:17:57,594 - Howdy, girl. - Hello. 238 00:17:57,660 --> 00:17:59,353 All right, keep that thing moving. 239 00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:02,140 - How's it going? - Everything's fine, Sarge. 240 00:18:05,960 --> 00:18:09,735 SARGE: Well, I'll be a monkey's uncle. Ted Striker. 241 00:18:10,715 --> 00:18:14,911 Jack, I got a bad feeling in my gut about this mission. 242 00:18:18,598 --> 00:18:20,700 Number two checks. 243 00:18:20,766 --> 00:18:22,618 (ALL SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY) 244 00:18:22,685 --> 00:18:24,708 (ROSE ROYCE'S "CAR WASH" PLAYING OVER HEADPHONES) 245 00:18:24,770 --> 00:18:27,089 Workin' at the car wash, girl 246 00:18:27,148 --> 00:18:30,127 - CLEANER: What's happening, bro? - Atmosphere control okay. 247 00:18:30,192 --> 00:18:32,340 - Atmosphere control. - Check. 248 00:18:32,445 --> 00:18:35,424 - Antigravity check. - All right. 249 00:18:36,574 --> 00:18:39,644 - Checks out in positive mode, sir. - Check. 250 00:18:39,702 --> 00:18:42,521 - Checks out in negative mode, sir. - Check. 251 00:18:42,580 --> 00:18:44,682 Neutral balance seems all right, sir. 252 00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:48,479 - Good. That should do it. - Antigravity off, sir. 253 00:18:48,544 --> 00:18:51,318 Hope this weather doesn't give us a problem. 254 00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:54,487 Mr. Dunn, what's your temperature reading? 255 00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:58,864 - Uh, 98.6, sir. - That sounds normal. 256 00:18:58,929 --> 00:19:00,952 (CHATTERING) 257 00:19:05,686 --> 00:19:07,834 (INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE) 258 00:19:07,897 --> 00:19:11,627 WOMAN 1: Sweetheart, you should have gone before we got on the plane. 259 00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:15,967 WOMAN 2: Excuse me, sir, I think you're in the wrong seat. That's mine. 260 00:19:18,866 --> 00:19:20,388 Elaine, wait. Listen to me. 261 00:19:20,451 --> 00:19:23,976 Ted, what are you doing? Why can't you just let me live my own life? 262 00:19:24,038 --> 00:19:27,688 It's more than just your life. It's the life of everyone on board this ship! 263 00:19:27,750 --> 00:19:29,602 We've gotta stop this flight. 264 00:19:29,669 --> 00:19:31,442 (BELL DINGING) 265 00:19:31,504 --> 00:19:35,450 - Ted, we're taking off. - Elaine, why don't you trust me anymore? 266 00:19:35,508 --> 00:19:39,909 Because you're not the man you used to be. You should never have left the hospital. 267 00:19:40,012 --> 00:19:42,991 - Please, take your seat. - Elaine. 268 00:19:43,057 --> 00:19:46,127 (DINGING) 269 00:19:48,813 --> 00:19:51,257 UNGER: It looks like that weather's starting to clear. 270 00:19:51,315 --> 00:19:54,794 I checked the satellite photos. Looks clear over Wyoming and Connecticut. 271 00:19:54,860 --> 00:19:57,588 - We just heard from Detroit. - How's she look over Reno and Buffalo? 272 00:19:57,655 --> 00:20:01,009 - Clear. Check out the New Jersey suburbs. - Right. 273 00:20:01,534 --> 00:20:04,854 Mayflower 1, you're clear on two-niner to taxi into launch position. 274 00:20:05,371 --> 00:20:09,146 Roger. Ready to taxi. Over. 275 00:20:09,709 --> 00:20:13,359 MAN (OVER PA): T-minus 30 seconds and counting. 276 00:20:17,258 --> 00:20:20,282 Mark T-minus 20 seconds. 277 00:20:34,191 --> 00:20:35,964 (CAR ENGINE REVVING) 278 00:20:37,778 --> 00:20:39,551 OVEUR: Ignition. 279 00:20:41,907 --> 00:20:46,808 T-minus nine, eight, seven... 280 00:20:46,871 --> 00:20:49,065 six, five... 281 00:20:49,498 --> 00:20:54,525 four, three, two, one. 282 00:21:02,178 --> 00:21:06,283 MAN (OVER RADIO): You have lift-off, Mayflower 1! Acknowledge. 283 00:21:09,268 --> 00:21:13,089 Roger, Control. This is Mayflower 1, acknowledge lift-off. 284 00:21:21,238 --> 00:21:23,340 (BOMB TICKING) 285 00:21:31,332 --> 00:21:34,026 Hello. Uh, we'll be sewing breakfast in a few minutes. 286 00:21:34,084 --> 00:21:36,562 - Will all three of you be eating? - Yes, thank you. 287 00:21:36,629 --> 00:21:40,950 And, Jimmy, when you're finished, I'll take you up front and you can look at the cockpit. 288 00:21:41,008 --> 00:21:43,110 Gee, that'll be neat. 289 00:21:44,011 --> 00:21:48,617 - I sure am glad they let Scraps ride with us. - I bet Scraps is gonna love the moon. 290 00:21:48,682 --> 00:21:50,955 Do you think things'll be different on the moon? 291 00:21:51,018 --> 00:21:54,839 It's gonna be terrific. A whole new world, new kids to play with. 292 00:21:54,897 --> 00:21:58,001 Does that mean no more headlines about the rape trial? 293 00:21:58,067 --> 00:22:00,920 How many kids get a chance to live on another planet? 294 00:22:00,986 --> 00:22:04,590 No more kids yelling, "Your old man's a psychopathic sex pervert"? 295 00:22:04,657 --> 00:22:07,977 Look, a man can make an honest mistake. Anyway, she was asking for it. 296 00:22:08,035 --> 00:22:10,888 They're all asking for it all the time! 297 00:22:11,705 --> 00:22:15,309 JIMMY (THINKING): Dad never slaps me around at home. It must be his coffee. 298 00:22:16,085 --> 00:22:19,234 ALICE (THINKING): No. I've been serving Dad decaf. 299 00:22:19,296 --> 00:22:22,491 Hmm. Maybe he's just an asshole. 300 00:22:23,259 --> 00:22:28,365 You know, dear, this reminds me of the first train trip we ever took. 301 00:22:28,430 --> 00:22:30,248 Out to your mother's house, remember? 302 00:22:30,307 --> 00:22:32,205 How could I forget? 303 00:22:32,268 --> 00:22:35,793 - You were so nervous about meeting my mama. - Heh. 304 00:22:35,855 --> 00:22:38,083 And I declare, you were pacing the aisle... 305 00:22:38,148 --> 00:22:41,092 all the way from St. Louis to Sioux Falls. 306 00:22:41,151 --> 00:22:42,719 (CHUCKLES) 307 00:22:42,778 --> 00:22:45,347 And how about the time we hopped in the family car... 308 00:22:45,406 --> 00:22:47,053 and drove all the way to Woodstock? 309 00:22:47,116 --> 00:22:49,719 Oh. That was a time. 310 00:22:49,785 --> 00:22:53,981 And you got hold of that bad acid and didn't come down for two weeks. 311 00:22:54,039 --> 00:22:57,359 You kept telling everyone that you were Jesus Christ... 312 00:22:57,418 --> 00:23:02,319 and then you jumped off a roof because you thought you could fly. 313 00:23:02,381 --> 00:23:05,655 - What a bummer. - No shit. 314 00:23:11,724 --> 00:23:13,451 (TED SIGHS) 315 00:23:21,442 --> 00:23:23,215 (VACUUM WHIRRING) 316 00:23:58,479 --> 00:24:02,800 You look a little green. Are you all right, young man? 317 00:24:02,858 --> 00:24:06,462 You know, some people get airsick, but I never do. 318 00:24:06,528 --> 00:24:09,757 I must have an iron constitution. 319 00:24:09,823 --> 00:24:12,301 - I'm all right. - Good. 320 00:24:13,702 --> 00:24:17,898 I guess what's really bothering me is my whole life. 321 00:24:17,957 --> 00:24:21,357 I really can't figure where Elaine and I went wrong. 322 00:24:21,418 --> 00:24:26,866 I'm sure you know what it's like when two people share the same space. 323 00:24:26,924 --> 00:24:31,370 Something happens. Your vibes go out of synch. 324 00:24:34,390 --> 00:24:38,540 I thought we shared a very special kind of love... 325 00:24:38,602 --> 00:24:40,545 but I'm not sure I know what love is anymore. 326 00:24:40,604 --> 00:24:42,251 (VOMITS) 327 00:24:43,941 --> 00:24:46,419 I guess it all started at the trial. 328 00:24:46,485 --> 00:24:50,510 They had to cover up for the crash, so they made me the scapegoat. 329 00:24:50,572 --> 00:24:52,265 I had no one to turn to. 330 00:24:52,950 --> 00:24:56,304 I'm sure you've had the same experience yourself. 331 00:24:56,370 --> 00:24:59,519 I couldn't believe what was happening to me. 332 00:25:01,250 --> 00:25:03,773 PROSECUTOR: I think it's important we establish a few facts... 333 00:25:03,836 --> 00:25:07,236 so these people will be prepared to make a fair decision. 334 00:25:07,297 --> 00:25:13,154 First, were you or were you not the chief test pilot for the lunar shuttle XR-2300? 335 00:25:13,220 --> 00:25:14,367 Yes. 336 00:25:14,430 --> 00:25:16,749 PROSECUTOR: Now, on the fifth day of October this year... 337 00:25:16,807 --> 00:25:18,625 that shuttle crash landed during a test. 338 00:25:18,684 --> 00:25:22,209 Were you or were you not the pilot on that flight? 339 00:25:22,271 --> 00:25:26,092 - Yes, but I wasn't... - And, Mr. Striker, is it not true... 340 00:25:26,150 --> 00:25:27,297 (PUDDLE SPLASHES) 341 00:25:27,359 --> 00:25:31,635 that that crash was a direct result of your incompetence? 342 00:25:31,697 --> 00:25:34,801 No! The problem was with that ship, not with me. 343 00:25:34,867 --> 00:25:38,722 The wiring was shorting out. I knew it wouldn't take a reentry burn. 344 00:25:38,787 --> 00:25:41,015 That thing was a flying deathtrap. 345 00:25:41,081 --> 00:25:43,775 (WOMAN SCREAMS THEN GLASS BREAKS) 346 00:25:43,834 --> 00:25:47,609 The fact is, gentlemen, nothing serious was wrong with that ship. 347 00:25:47,671 --> 00:25:50,524 - Ted Striker just folded up on the approach. - That's a lie! 348 00:25:50,591 --> 00:25:51,783 (GAVEL BANGS) 349 00:25:51,842 --> 00:25:54,411 Order! Order! 350 00:25:54,470 --> 00:26:00,168 On March 5th, 1980, flight 209 into Chicago lost its crew in midair. 351 00:26:00,809 --> 00:26:06,131 And on that fateful night, Ted Striker saved that plane. 352 00:26:06,190 --> 00:26:09,419 I'd like to call one of the passengers from that flight... 353 00:26:09,485 --> 00:26:11,087 if it pleases the court. 354 00:26:13,530 --> 00:26:17,601 Do you swear on the Constitution to tell the whole truth, and nothing but the truth? 355 00:26:17,659 --> 00:26:19,682 Ain't no thing. 356 00:26:28,253 --> 00:26:32,028 Would you describe, in your own words, what happened that night? 357 00:26:32,091 --> 00:26:35,491 Check it, bro was on. 358 00:26:35,552 --> 00:26:38,371 Didn't trip. Folks was freaking. 359 00:26:38,430 --> 00:26:40,953 And the pilots were laid to the bone. 360 00:26:41,016 --> 00:26:44,541 So blood hammered out and jammed, Jim. 361 00:26:44,603 --> 00:26:48,424 Tighten that bad sucker side of the runway like a mother. Shit. 362 00:26:49,983 --> 00:26:54,054 HAMMEN: I know I wouldn't be alive today if it wasn't for Mr. Striker. 363 00:26:54,863 --> 00:27:01,596 I find it difficult even now to think about that night over Chicago. 364 00:27:01,662 --> 00:27:05,562 Please try, Mrs. Hammen. It's very important. 365 00:27:05,624 --> 00:27:07,772 Well... 366 00:27:07,835 --> 00:27:11,030 we lost the crew... 367 00:27:11,088 --> 00:27:12,815 and... 368 00:27:12,881 --> 00:27:16,030 the food poisoning made us all very ill. 369 00:27:16,093 --> 00:27:20,164 (SOBBING) I lost control. We all did. 370 00:27:20,222 --> 00:27:23,622 And then the bad weather... 371 00:27:23,684 --> 00:27:24,831 and the lightning... 372 00:27:24,893 --> 00:27:26,119 (THUNDER CRASHING) 373 00:27:26,186 --> 00:27:30,632 - I've got to get out of here! - Calm down! Get a hold of yourself! 374 00:27:30,691 --> 00:27:32,634 Stewardess, please, let me handle this. 375 00:27:32,693 --> 00:27:35,592 (WHIMPERING) I've got to get out! 376 00:27:35,654 --> 00:27:39,008 Calm down. Now, get back to your seat. I'll take care of this. 377 00:27:39,074 --> 00:27:41,176 Calm down! Get a hold of yourself! 378 00:27:41,243 --> 00:27:46,645 Doctor, you're wanted on the phone. Everything's going to be all right. 379 00:27:46,707 --> 00:27:49,856 - MAN: I'll handle this. - HAMMEN: I've got to get out of here! 380 00:27:49,918 --> 00:27:52,567 This is very important! 381 00:27:53,589 --> 00:27:56,363 JUDGE: Let the court handle this! 382 00:27:59,386 --> 00:28:03,662 Will you please control yourself? Bailiff, Valium! 383 00:28:03,724 --> 00:28:06,577 I flew with Striker during the war. 384 00:28:06,643 --> 00:28:09,087 I'll never forget the night we bombed Macho Grande. 385 00:28:09,146 --> 00:28:11,294 Striker was a squadron leader. 386 00:28:11,356 --> 00:28:14,426 He brought us in real low, but he couldn't handle it. 387 00:28:14,484 --> 00:28:17,007 Buddy couldn't handle it. Was Buddy one of your crew? 388 00:28:17,070 --> 00:28:21,175 Right. Buddy was the bombardier, but it was Striker who couldn't handle it. 389 00:28:21,241 --> 00:28:23,389 - And he went to pieces. - Andy went to pieces? 390 00:28:23,452 --> 00:28:27,432 No, Andy was the navigator. He was all right. Buddy went to pieces. 391 00:28:27,497 --> 00:28:30,942 - It was awful, how he came unglued. - Howie came unglued? 392 00:28:31,001 --> 00:28:36,232 Oh, no, Howie was a rock, the best tail gunner in the outfit. Buddy came unglued. 393 00:28:36,298 --> 00:28:40,244 - And he bailed out? - No! Andy hung tough. Buddy bailed out. 394 00:28:40,302 --> 00:28:43,030 How we survived was a miracle. 395 00:28:43,096 --> 00:28:45,164 Then Howie survived? 396 00:28:45,224 --> 00:28:48,203 No. Afraid not. We lost Howie the next day. 397 00:28:49,895 --> 00:28:51,463 Over Macho Grande? 398 00:28:51,521 --> 00:28:54,966 No. I don't think I'll ever get over Macho Grande. 399 00:28:55,025 --> 00:28:58,550 Those wounds run pretty deep. 400 00:29:00,364 --> 00:29:04,264 ELAINE: Ted and I were very close once. We had the kind of relationship... 401 00:29:04,326 --> 00:29:08,306 where we laughed and laughed and laughed all the time. 402 00:29:08,372 --> 00:29:10,770 Do you know what it's like to laugh like that? 403 00:29:10,832 --> 00:29:13,026 Yes. Yes, I do. 404 00:29:13,085 --> 00:29:16,940 Then things started to come apart. He was obsessed with that shuttle. 405 00:29:17,005 --> 00:29:21,531 He started to talk about it all the time, even at night in bed... 406 00:29:21,593 --> 00:29:25,539 and I guess that's when the real problems started. 407 00:29:26,139 --> 00:29:30,244 - Please elaborate. - Well... 408 00:29:30,310 --> 00:29:35,962 at first, sex between us was a wonderful experience... 409 00:29:36,733 --> 00:29:40,087 the way he touched me. 410 00:29:40,195 --> 00:29:42,218 He was so gentle. 411 00:29:42,281 --> 00:29:45,351 He'd unbutton my blouse... 412 00:29:45,409 --> 00:29:47,557 and then... 413 00:29:47,619 --> 00:29:49,187 And then... 414 00:29:49,288 --> 00:29:51,356 (MAN GRUNTS) 415 00:29:51,790 --> 00:29:55,520 We drifted apart. I'm sorry. I can't go on. 416 00:29:56,837 --> 00:30:02,615 At the request of this court, Mr. Striker has undergone a psychiatric examination. 417 00:30:02,676 --> 00:30:05,871 The court calls Dr. Franklin Stone. 418 00:30:05,971 --> 00:30:08,449 Doctor, can you give your impression of Mr. Striker? 419 00:30:08,515 --> 00:30:11,585 I'm sorry, I don't do impressions. My training is in psychiatry. 420 00:30:11,643 --> 00:30:12,739 Of course. 421 00:30:12,765 --> 00:30:17,150 In your opinion, doctor, was Ted Striker competent to fly and land that shuttle? 422 00:30:17,190 --> 00:30:19,964 The defendant suffers from chronic psychological stress... 423 00:30:20,027 --> 00:30:23,176 and in a pressure situation can snap just like that: 424 00:30:23,238 --> 00:30:25,432 - Like that? - That's it. 425 00:30:25,490 --> 00:30:30,141 It is my opinion he is a danger to himself and others, and is in need of treatment. 426 00:30:30,245 --> 00:30:32,313 JUDGE: Mr. Striker. 427 00:30:34,583 --> 00:30:38,313 This court recommends that you be confined to an institution... 428 00:30:38,378 --> 00:30:43,655 for treatment until such time as you are deemed fit to re-enter society. 429 00:30:43,717 --> 00:30:45,410 But I was framed! 430 00:30:45,469 --> 00:30:48,914 - Order! Order! Order! - I'm not guilty! That ship did have faulty wiring! 431 00:30:48,972 --> 00:30:51,200 REPORTER: Would you hold for a picture, please? 432 00:30:52,100 --> 00:30:54,498 I'm not guilty! I'm not guilty! 433 00:30:54,603 --> 00:30:57,126 Ted! Ted! 434 00:30:57,981 --> 00:30:59,128 Judge! 435 00:30:59,191 --> 00:31:01,635 - How about a photo for the Daily News? - Of course. 436 00:31:01,693 --> 00:31:03,386 Thanks, counselor. 437 00:31:03,445 --> 00:31:06,094 Picture. 438 00:31:06,156 --> 00:31:08,258 It's for Ted's own good, Elaine. 439 00:31:08,325 --> 00:31:11,144 TED: I thought I was right and everyone else was wrong. 440 00:31:11,203 --> 00:31:13,601 Now I'm not sure of anything anymore. 441 00:31:13,663 --> 00:31:18,143 Well, there's a lot more to the story, but you probably heard enough already. Heh. 442 00:31:18,210 --> 00:31:20,608 I don't want to go on forever... 443 00:31:40,107 --> 00:31:42,084 (ALARM BEEPING) 444 00:31:45,070 --> 00:31:48,549 Uh, Captain, I'm picking up an overheat in the computer core. 445 00:31:48,615 --> 00:31:52,390 - How serious is it, Mr. Dunn? - Uh, I can't tell, sir. 446 00:31:52,452 --> 00:31:54,896 You can tell me. I'm the captain. 447 00:31:54,955 --> 00:31:58,480 Uh, I can't really localize it, but it is definitely in the computer core. 448 00:31:58,542 --> 00:32:02,488 - Elaine, you better run a computer check. - Yes, sir. 449 00:32:05,215 --> 00:32:06,612 ROK: Voice interface. 450 00:32:06,675 --> 00:32:09,699 There's an overheat in the core. Please analyze problem. 451 00:32:09,761 --> 00:32:12,660 ROK: There is no apparent overheat. 452 00:32:13,432 --> 00:32:17,582 Yes, there is, Rok. We read a core overheat. Repeat analysis. 453 00:32:18,145 --> 00:32:23,092 ROK: Analysis confirmed. All systems compute positive. 454 00:32:23,150 --> 00:32:25,673 Well, not from where I'm sitting, they don't. 455 00:32:25,735 --> 00:32:29,635 ROK: Look, Elaine, cut the not-where-I'm-sitting shit. 456 00:32:29,698 --> 00:32:32,096 It must be a human error. 457 00:32:32,159 --> 00:32:34,728 Captain, I think we have a computer foul-up. 458 00:32:34,786 --> 00:32:37,480 - I see. - Well, what do you recommend, captain? 459 00:32:37,539 --> 00:32:39,687 Maybe you better run it through the computer. 460 00:32:39,749 --> 00:32:41,772 - But, sir, I already have! - Good. 461 00:32:42,377 --> 00:32:45,572 Just to be on the safe side, should I check the rear data banks? 462 00:32:45,630 --> 00:32:50,031 - No. Why don't you check the rear data banks? - Yes, sir. 463 00:32:54,931 --> 00:32:56,908 (BOMB TICKING) 464 00:32:57,392 --> 00:33:01,087 Oh. Sir, you should really put that case in the compartment above your head. 465 00:33:01,146 --> 00:33:05,046 - I'll keep it with me. - Well, I can help you if you can't get it up. 466 00:33:06,443 --> 00:33:09,672 I said, I'll keep it with me. 467 00:33:19,998 --> 00:33:22,021 - Ted. Ted, please. - Elaine, listen to me. 468 00:33:22,083 --> 00:33:24,777 - Ted, we can't go on like this. - We have to go back. 469 00:33:24,836 --> 00:33:28,531 I understand perfectly. We had something very special, but it's over. 470 00:33:28,590 --> 00:33:31,113 - We can't go back. - This flight has to go back. 471 00:33:31,176 --> 00:33:33,119 That wiring could blow any second. 472 00:33:33,178 --> 00:33:34,964 There's nothing wrong with this ship. 473 00:33:34,990 --> 00:33:37,433 The problem's in your mind, where it's always been. 474 00:33:37,474 --> 00:33:41,169 - Then you do think I'm insane. - I'd never use the word insane, Ted. 475 00:33:41,228 --> 00:33:45,333 - What word would you use, Elaine? - The word is "sick", Ted. 476 00:33:45,398 --> 00:33:47,546 Goodbye. 477 00:33:47,609 --> 00:33:49,177 (MEN SPEAKING IN CANTONESE) 478 00:33:50,237 --> 00:33:52,635 Uh, sir, that overheat is getting worse. 479 00:33:52,697 --> 00:33:55,471 I'd better get back into the core and check it out. 480 00:33:55,534 --> 00:33:57,602 Uh, thanks, but I'd rather you check it out, Dunn. 481 00:33:57,661 --> 00:33:58,978 Uh, right. 482 00:33:59,037 --> 00:34:01,481 Sir, we're carrying emergency fuel back there as well. 483 00:34:01,540 --> 00:34:04,189 You'd better get back there too. I'll fly the ship. 484 00:34:04,251 --> 00:34:05,819 - And be careful. - Yes, sir. 485 00:34:09,339 --> 00:34:12,739 Captain, do you mind if Jimmy here takes a look around? 486 00:34:12,801 --> 00:34:17,873 Of course not, Mary. Come on in, Jimmy. Hi, there. 487 00:34:17,931 --> 00:34:20,534 Thanks. Boy, there's a lot of neat stuff in here. 488 00:34:20,600 --> 00:34:23,499 Well, this is really the nerve center of the whole ship. 489 00:34:23,562 --> 00:34:26,541 Say, that sure is a cute puppy. What's his name? 490 00:34:26,606 --> 00:34:28,583 - Scraps. - Scraps. 491 00:34:28,650 --> 00:34:31,003 - Can I hold him once? - Yeah. 492 00:34:31,069 --> 00:34:36,892 Heh, come on, Scraps. Oh, I used to have a puppy like this when I was a kid. 493 00:34:36,950 --> 00:34:38,848 - You like to play ball with him? - Yeah. 494 00:34:38,910 --> 00:34:41,980 Sure. You like to throw a stick and have him bring it back? 495 00:34:42,038 --> 00:34:44,516 - Yeah. - Heh, of course you do. 496 00:34:44,583 --> 00:34:47,277 Well, my goodness, Scraps is a boy dog, isn't he? 497 00:34:47,335 --> 00:34:48,482 (SCRAPS GROWLS) 498 00:34:48,545 --> 00:34:49,692 Yeah. 499 00:34:49,754 --> 00:34:55,486 Jimmy, do you like it when Scraps holds onto your leg and rubs up and down? 500 00:34:58,597 --> 00:35:01,917 - God help us. - Look at this place. Check those fuel drums... 501 00:35:01,975 --> 00:35:03,748 - ...I'll take care of the computer. - Right. 502 00:35:03,810 --> 00:35:05,162 (ALARM BEEPING) 503 00:35:26,875 --> 00:35:30,070 Jimmy, do you ever wonder why dogs sniff each other in the...? 504 00:35:30,128 --> 00:35:33,607 - Well, captain, everything A-okay? - Yes, everything's fine. 505 00:35:33,673 --> 00:35:35,992 - Right, Jimmy? - Yeah, everything's real neat up here. 506 00:35:36,051 --> 00:35:37,198 (ALARM BEEPING) 507 00:35:37,260 --> 00:35:38,407 That's strange. 508 00:35:40,972 --> 00:35:42,415 What's strange, captain? 509 00:35:42,474 --> 00:35:45,748 It's an asteroid field. But there's nothing like that in this sector, unless... 510 00:35:45,810 --> 00:35:48,709 - Unless what, captain? - Well, unless we're off course. 511 00:35:53,818 --> 00:35:56,762 - Captain Oveur, Dunn here. - OVEUR: Yes, come in, Dunn. Over. 512 00:35:56,821 --> 00:35:59,015 There's been a pretty bad fire here, sir. 513 00:35:59,074 --> 00:36:02,053 We're going to have to disconnect the damaged systems. 514 00:36:02,118 --> 00:36:05,813 Mr. Unger is attempting a manual shutdown right now. 515 00:36:05,872 --> 00:36:08,066 ROK: What are you doing, Dave? 516 00:36:08,124 --> 00:36:10,818 DUNN: Well, sir, the computer has suffered some bad damage. 517 00:36:10,877 --> 00:36:12,274 ROK: This is highly irregular. 518 00:36:13,838 --> 00:36:17,067 Right. Right. 519 00:36:17,133 --> 00:36:20,533 I just hope we can still control Rok's higher brain function, sir. 520 00:36:20,637 --> 00:36:23,866 Do what's necessary. I'll go to manual on all downed systems. 521 00:36:23,932 --> 00:36:26,080 DUNN: Yes, sir, we will... Unh! 522 00:36:26,685 --> 00:36:28,833 - Jesus! - Hang on! 523 00:36:28,895 --> 00:36:32,750 I'll try to override Rok's circuit and shut the door from here! Almost got it. 524 00:36:32,816 --> 00:36:35,044 DUNN: Holy shit! 525 00:36:35,110 --> 00:36:36,837 (UNGER SCREAMS) 526 00:36:38,905 --> 00:36:41,178 (CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING OVER HEADPHONES) 527 00:37:06,850 --> 00:37:08,452 - Did you see that? - Excuse me? 528 00:37:08,518 --> 00:37:10,746 There's two crewmen out there. Look. 529 00:37:18,236 --> 00:37:22,182 I'm afraid there's nothing out there but empty space. 530 00:37:23,074 --> 00:37:24,847 I swear I... 531 00:37:25,827 --> 00:37:28,601 STONE: The defendant suffers from chronic psychological stress... 532 00:37:28,663 --> 00:37:31,858 and in a pressure situation can snap just like that. 533 00:37:31,916 --> 00:37:35,566 (ECHOING) Like that. Like that. Like that. 534 00:37:35,628 --> 00:37:38,231 Maybe they were right about me. 535 00:37:38,298 --> 00:37:40,116 My God. Maybe I am cracking up. 536 00:37:40,175 --> 00:37:42,448 (RUMBLING) (PASSENGERS GASPING) 537 00:37:50,143 --> 00:37:53,543 - What's happening, captain? - We're off course and computer-locked. 538 00:37:53,605 --> 00:37:56,834 That fire in Rok's core must have played havoc with his higher brain functions. 539 00:37:56,900 --> 00:38:01,380 Captain, Mr. Dunn and Mr. Unger were sucked out an air lock in the computer room. 540 00:38:01,446 --> 00:38:02,593 Both together? 541 00:38:02,655 --> 00:38:07,101 BOTH: Mr. Dunn and Mr. Unger were sucked out an air lock in the computer room. 542 00:38:07,160 --> 00:38:11,640 Don't panic. Calm down, ladies. Now, are there any other problems? 543 00:38:11,706 --> 00:38:13,353 Captain, we've run out of coffee. 544 00:38:13,416 --> 00:38:15,769 Damn! I've told them a hundred times, store extra coffee! 545 00:38:17,045 --> 00:38:19,944 Captain, what should we do if the passengers start to panic? 546 00:38:20,006 --> 00:38:22,575 All right, this is the way we're gonna play it. 547 00:38:22,634 --> 00:38:25,533 Mary, I want you here in case there's a full-cabin press. 548 00:38:25,595 --> 00:38:29,120 Testa, cover Mary's weak side in case she gets double-teamed. 549 00:38:29,182 --> 00:38:31,034 - Right! - Right! 550 00:38:31,518 --> 00:38:33,791 Captain, I don't think we have any alternatives. 551 00:38:33,853 --> 00:38:36,547 I see. What do you think our alternatives are? 552 00:38:36,606 --> 00:38:39,084 We have to disconnect Rok's higher brain function... 553 00:38:39,150 --> 00:38:41,298 without disturbing its regulatory system. 554 00:38:41,361 --> 00:38:43,429 That computer has a self-defense mechanism. 555 00:38:43,488 --> 00:38:46,432 Dunn and Unger tried, you heard what happened to them. 556 00:38:46,491 --> 00:38:48,844 I know. Sucked out. 557 00:38:48,910 --> 00:38:50,478 (THUNDER CRASHES) 558 00:38:50,537 --> 00:38:54,312 Still, it's our only chance. I think it might be safer try it from up here. 559 00:38:54,374 --> 00:38:56,977 Roger. You get back and monitor the regulatory unit. 560 00:38:57,043 --> 00:39:00,613 - Right. Good luck, captain. - Don't worry about me. 561 00:39:02,173 --> 00:39:03,900 (CHATTERING) 562 00:39:05,009 --> 00:39:11,082 Ladies and gentlemen, please calm down. Please, listen to me. 563 00:39:11,140 --> 00:39:14,915 I want to tell you what's going on with the ship. 564 00:39:16,980 --> 00:39:21,506 Thank you. We've been thrown off course just a tad. 565 00:39:21,609 --> 00:39:23,632 WOMAN: What's a tad? 566 00:39:23,695 --> 00:39:25,797 Miss, what exactly is a "tad"? 567 00:39:25,905 --> 00:39:29,430 In space terms, that's about half a million miles. 568 00:39:29,534 --> 00:39:31,602 MAN: Oh, that's interesting. 569 00:39:32,453 --> 00:39:37,525 The bumps you feel are asteroids smashing into the hull of the ship. 570 00:39:37,584 --> 00:39:40,437 Also, we're flying without a navigational system... 571 00:39:40,503 --> 00:39:43,322 and can't seem to change course. 572 00:39:43,423 --> 00:39:46,117 Miss, are you telling us absolutely everything? 573 00:39:46,175 --> 00:39:49,245 Not exactly. We're also out of coffee. 574 00:39:49,304 --> 00:39:52,123 (ALL SCREAMING AND CLAMORING) 575 00:40:03,610 --> 00:40:08,136 Listen to me! Your crew is in complete control of the situation. 576 00:40:10,158 --> 00:40:13,011 Trust me. There's absolutely nothing to worry about! 577 00:40:16,956 --> 00:40:20,936 You're right. They're off course and heading straight for the sun. 578 00:40:21,002 --> 00:40:22,149 I've seen enough, Bob. 579 00:40:22,211 --> 00:40:24,109 MAN (ON RADIO): Two minutes for high sticking. 580 00:40:24,172 --> 00:40:25,865 Get me Steve McCroskey, and fast. 581 00:40:25,924 --> 00:40:28,618 McCroskey hasn't handled a tower since the strike. 582 00:40:28,676 --> 00:40:31,950 Ever since Reagan fired the controllers, he's been completely senile. 583 00:40:32,013 --> 00:40:33,956 Yeah, but what about McCroskey? 584 00:40:34,015 --> 00:40:38,461 - Pretty much the same as Reagan. - I don't care. Get him. 585 00:40:44,442 --> 00:40:47,591 Father, I've led such a sinful life. 586 00:40:47,654 --> 00:40:51,054 I'm married with two kids, and there were these girls at the company. 587 00:40:51,115 --> 00:40:52,745 I got both of them pregnant, 588 00:40:52,771 --> 00:40:56,497 so I had to steal from the company to pay for the abortions... 589 00:40:56,537 --> 00:40:57,763 (SNEEZES) 590 00:40:57,830 --> 00:41:00,774 - God bless you. - Thank you, Father. Thank you. 591 00:41:00,875 --> 00:41:04,024 I've always loved you, darling, but I have to tell you... 592 00:41:04,087 --> 00:41:06,406 I was unfaithful to you, just once. 593 00:41:06,464 --> 00:41:08,692 Oh, I understand, darling. 594 00:41:08,758 --> 00:41:11,953 Remember Jill, my first secretary? Forgive me. 595 00:41:12,011 --> 00:41:15,866 That's all right. I knew about it all the time. 596 00:41:15,932 --> 00:41:20,082 - I was unfaithful too. - I understand, darling. 597 00:41:20,144 --> 00:41:24,294 Remember Susan, your last receptionist? 598 00:41:25,608 --> 00:41:27,176 (GIRL CLEARS THROAT) 599 00:41:27,235 --> 00:41:29,463 I don't mean to sound forward. 600 00:41:29,529 --> 00:41:33,133 I mean, I know I don't know you... 601 00:41:33,199 --> 00:41:36,269 but I don't think we're going to live through this... 602 00:41:36,327 --> 00:41:40,682 and I've, uh, never... 603 00:41:40,748 --> 00:41:42,942 been with a man before. 604 00:41:44,252 --> 00:41:47,151 I know this really isn't the place. 605 00:41:47,213 --> 00:41:49,315 Oh, no, no. I understand. 606 00:41:50,675 --> 00:41:52,118 WOMAN: Who turned off the...? 607 00:41:52,176 --> 00:41:53,823 (PEOPLE CLAMORING) 608 00:41:59,809 --> 00:42:02,037 ROK: What are you doing, captain? 609 00:42:04,605 --> 00:42:06,799 This is highly irregular. 610 00:42:11,487 --> 00:42:12,930 (COUGHING) 611 00:42:23,458 --> 00:42:26,357 - Get me some coffee, miss. - Yes, sir. 612 00:42:26,419 --> 00:42:30,774 - A quart of Geritol and a ham on rye. No cheese. - Yes, sir. Welcome home, sir. 613 00:42:30,840 --> 00:42:33,693 - Here's the navigational charts, sir. - Good, good. 614 00:42:34,719 --> 00:42:37,743 - Get me radio contact with that ship. Pronto. - Pronto. 615 00:42:37,805 --> 00:42:41,751 Here's all the available information on the sun, sir. That thing is hot! 616 00:42:41,809 --> 00:42:45,379 - Get me Bud Kruger immediately. And some ice. - Yes, sir. Yes, sir. 617 00:42:45,438 --> 00:42:46,630 Jacobs. 618 00:42:48,149 --> 00:42:50,877 I want to know absolutely everything that's happened. 619 00:42:50,943 --> 00:42:55,389 Well, let's see, first the Earth cooled, and then the dinosaurs came. 620 00:42:55,448 --> 00:42:58,927 But they got too big and fat, so they died, and turned into oil. 621 00:42:58,993 --> 00:43:01,516 And then the Arabs came and bought Mercedes-Benzes. 622 00:43:01,579 --> 00:43:04,102 Prince Charles started wearing Lady Di's clothes. 623 00:43:04,165 --> 00:43:08,111 I couldn't believe it. He took her best summer dress, put it on and went to town. 624 00:43:08,169 --> 00:43:11,364 Things sure haven't changed. 625 00:43:12,090 --> 00:43:14,818 Captain, I think we've got... Captain? 626 00:43:14,884 --> 00:43:16,406 Captain Oveur, what's wrong? 627 00:43:16,469 --> 00:43:17,661 (COUGHING) 628 00:43:17,720 --> 00:43:20,699 What's wrong? What are you trying to say? 629 00:43:20,765 --> 00:43:25,416 One? One? One what? One word! First word? First syllable? 630 00:43:25,478 --> 00:43:28,923 Captain, I'm not very good at this. Ten words! 631 00:43:28,981 --> 00:43:31,379 How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying. 632 00:43:31,442 --> 00:43:33,340 What am I saying? Throat. 633 00:43:33,402 --> 00:43:38,053 Throat. Sounds like choke. Choke. You... 634 00:43:38,157 --> 00:43:40,635 Oh, my God! You were gassed by Rok? 635 00:43:40,701 --> 00:43:41,848 I got it! I got it! 636 00:43:41,911 --> 00:43:43,058 (LAUGHS) 637 00:43:43,121 --> 00:43:45,269 Elaine. 638 00:43:45,331 --> 00:43:48,150 Simon, the Captain's been gassed by Rok. 639 00:43:48,209 --> 00:43:51,188 Simon, we're way off course. 640 00:43:51,254 --> 00:43:53,402 SIMON: You're right, Elaine. We are off course. 641 00:43:53,464 --> 00:43:56,534 - My God. The sun. - What is it, Simon? 642 00:43:56,592 --> 00:44:00,788 The large fiery ball at the center of our solar system, but that's not important now. 643 00:44:00,847 --> 00:44:03,826 We're headed right for it. We've got to get off this ship. 644 00:44:03,891 --> 00:44:06,414 Don't be a fool, Simon. We have to change course. 645 00:44:06,477 --> 00:44:09,922 We're computer-locked, and the manual navigational system is down. 646 00:44:09,981 --> 00:44:12,083 Then Ted was right all along. 647 00:44:12,150 --> 00:44:14,298 What am I gonna do? My career will be ruined. 648 00:44:14,360 --> 00:44:17,555 Your career? What about the careers of the people on this ship? 649 00:44:17,613 --> 00:44:20,341 The lawyers, the architects, the dental hygienists? 650 00:44:20,408 --> 00:44:23,978 Forget about them, Elaine. We have to think of ourselves. 651 00:44:24,036 --> 00:44:28,266 What happened to the man I thought I loved? I'm gonna get Ted. 652 00:44:28,332 --> 00:44:30,355 Just don't come apart on me now. 653 00:44:35,923 --> 00:44:40,654 I... I don't mean to sound forward, I mean, I know I don't know you... 654 00:44:40,720 --> 00:44:44,541 but I don't think that we're gonna live through this. 655 00:44:44,599 --> 00:44:48,203 And I've never been with a man before. 656 00:44:48,269 --> 00:44:51,043 I know that this isn't the right place. 657 00:44:57,361 --> 00:45:01,011 Damn. Until we get through to them, our hands are tied. We gotta make plans. 658 00:45:01,073 --> 00:45:02,891 Sorry, I'm busy right through Friday. 659 00:45:02,950 --> 00:45:05,724 - Stinson. - But how about lunch Saturday? 660 00:45:05,786 --> 00:45:07,854 Have you contacted the families of the passengers? 661 00:45:07,914 --> 00:45:09,857 They're outside now, sir. They're not too happy. 662 00:45:09,916 --> 00:45:11,313 (CLAMORING) 663 00:45:14,712 --> 00:45:18,157 Try and calm them down. For God's sake, be diplomatic. 664 00:45:19,300 --> 00:45:20,447 Give them the lead! 665 00:45:34,148 --> 00:45:37,878 Ted. Ted, listen to me. We've lost the crew, and Simon's turned to jelly. 666 00:45:41,364 --> 00:45:43,592 Ted, we need you. 667 00:45:43,658 --> 00:45:47,183 Elaine, you were right about me. 668 00:45:47,245 --> 00:45:51,441 I folded up over Macho Grande, and I folded up on the test flight. 669 00:45:51,499 --> 00:45:54,648 I crack under pressure, just like they said. 670 00:45:54,710 --> 00:45:59,486 You overcame your drinking problem. I know you can overcome this. 671 00:46:01,217 --> 00:46:04,287 It's no use, Elaine. I just can't do it. 672 00:46:04,345 --> 00:46:07,039 Ted, you were right about this ship. 673 00:46:07,098 --> 00:46:11,829 I don't know how to say this, but maybe in this mixed-up, topsy-turvy world of ours... 674 00:46:11,894 --> 00:46:15,419 they should take all the quote "sane" people and lock them up... 675 00:46:15,481 --> 00:46:19,711 and let all the psychopaths out of the asylums to run the world. 676 00:46:19,777 --> 00:46:23,347 No, I guess on second thought, that's a bad idea, Ted. 677 00:46:23,406 --> 00:46:27,136 What I'm trying to say is that I was wrong and I hope you can forgive me... 678 00:46:27,201 --> 00:46:31,306 because we need you in that cockpit now more than ever. 679 00:46:31,372 --> 00:46:34,225 Excuse me, ma'am, there's some banged-up people back there. 680 00:46:34,292 --> 00:46:39,148 I'm gonna need some fresh sheets, gauze, Q-tips and all the Vaseline you have. 681 00:46:39,213 --> 00:46:41,987 - Ted, please! - Right now. 682 00:46:43,050 --> 00:46:45,619 - Are you the nurse? - Yes. Take this. 683 00:46:45,678 --> 00:46:48,452 The washroom's just down there on the right. 684 00:46:49,932 --> 00:46:52,034 I don't mean to sound forward. 685 00:46:52,101 --> 00:46:55,171 I mean, I know I don't know you... 686 00:46:55,229 --> 00:46:58,583 but I don't think we're going to live through this... 687 00:46:58,649 --> 00:47:00,592 and I've never been with a man before. 688 00:47:00,651 --> 00:47:02,048 (DONKEY BRAYS) 689 00:47:02,111 --> 00:47:04,430 I mean, I know this isn't the right place... 690 00:47:05,114 --> 00:47:06,306 Simon, I... 691 00:47:06,365 --> 00:47:09,560 MAN (OVER RADIO): This is Mission Control. Do you read, Mayflower? Over. 692 00:47:09,618 --> 00:47:12,096 Hello. This is the Mayflower. Come in, anyone. 693 00:47:12,163 --> 00:47:15,062 Okay, okay. Now we're making some headway. 694 00:47:15,124 --> 00:47:17,727 Yeah, yeah. We read you, Mayflower. Identify yourself. 695 00:47:17,793 --> 00:47:22,649 Well, this is Elaine Dickenson. I'm 5'8", 123 pounds... 696 00:47:22,715 --> 00:47:26,570 I have, uh, brown hair, blue eyes. 697 00:47:26,635 --> 00:47:31,707 I enjoy surfing, backgammon and men who aren't afraid to cry. 698 00:47:32,767 --> 00:47:36,588 Will somebody tell me what a woman is doing in charge of that ship? 699 00:47:36,645 --> 00:47:39,214 Well, maybe she's got her ship together. 700 00:47:44,862 --> 00:47:46,384 (SIGHS) 701 00:47:46,447 --> 00:47:48,595 MAN: But he smells so bad. 702 00:47:50,826 --> 00:47:52,098 (PEOPLE SHRIEK) 703 00:47:52,161 --> 00:47:55,481 - Can I sit here for a second, mister? - Oh, yeah, sure. 704 00:47:57,416 --> 00:48:00,110 - Be careful with that food. - I'll be careful. 705 00:48:00,169 --> 00:48:02,988 - Can I ask you a question? - What is it? 706 00:48:03,047 --> 00:48:06,492 It's an interrogative statement used to test knowledge. 707 00:48:06,550 --> 00:48:08,869 But that's not important right now, mister. 708 00:48:08,928 --> 00:48:12,373 Is my dog Scraps going to make it through all this okay? 709 00:48:12,431 --> 00:48:16,502 I'm scared, mister. Somebody has to do something. 710 00:48:19,188 --> 00:48:24,215 Scraps is going to be fine, son. You'll both be just fine. 711 00:48:31,117 --> 00:48:32,657 Striker, you gotta listen to me. 712 00:48:32,683 --> 00:48:35,713 I had nothing to do with this. They forced me to cut corners. 713 00:48:35,746 --> 00:48:39,441 - Get out of my way! - You gotta help me, Striker. 714 00:48:42,628 --> 00:48:46,904 - Elaine. You're all alone up here. - Ted, yes, I am. 715 00:48:46,966 --> 00:48:50,161 - What's going on? - There's no time to explain. Sit here, Ted. 716 00:48:50,219 --> 00:48:53,869 - I was wrong about you. - We all make mistakes, Elaine. 717 00:48:53,931 --> 00:48:57,706 - I'll never make that mistake about you again. - Forget about it. 718 00:48:57,768 --> 00:49:01,793 We're not living in the past or the present anymore. 719 00:49:01,856 --> 00:49:04,800 - This is the future. - Huh? 720 00:49:05,526 --> 00:49:08,926 Don't worry about a thing. Everything's going to be okay. 721 00:49:08,988 --> 00:49:11,056 I love you, Ted. 722 00:49:22,168 --> 00:49:25,238 Here it is. Elaine Dickenson, she's the ship's computer officer. 723 00:49:25,296 --> 00:49:27,490 Jacobs, what have you got on Elaine Dickenson? 724 00:49:27,548 --> 00:49:31,448 Well, I'm 2 inches taller, a better dancer and much more fun to be with. 725 00:49:33,345 --> 00:49:36,665 Ted, I have the strangest feeling... 726 00:49:36,724 --> 00:49:41,250 we've been through this exact same thing before. 727 00:49:41,312 --> 00:49:44,382 Except this time I know exactly what I'm doing, Elaine. 728 00:49:44,440 --> 00:49:46,042 Ted! 729 00:49:48,819 --> 00:49:49,966 You mean...? 730 00:49:50,029 --> 00:49:52,757 That's right. We're at the mercy of that computer. 731 00:49:54,283 --> 00:49:56,602 Then these things are totally useless. 732 00:49:59,330 --> 00:50:02,479 This is Mayflower 1 calling Mission Control. Do you read me? Over. 733 00:50:02,541 --> 00:50:05,144 At last, a man. That's more like it. 734 00:50:05,211 --> 00:50:08,531 This is Mission Control. Identify yourself and give me your position. 735 00:50:10,216 --> 00:50:13,240 The name's Striker. I'm sitting down and facing front. 736 00:50:13,302 --> 00:50:15,370 Why would you want to know that? 737 00:50:15,429 --> 00:50:18,203 Striker? Striker, Striker, Striker. 738 00:50:19,225 --> 00:50:22,545 - Striker! Striker. - Unh! 739 00:50:24,605 --> 00:50:27,299 - Ted Striker? - TED: That's right, McCroskey. 740 00:50:27,358 --> 00:50:31,258 I may be in the cockpit, but I don't think there's a hell of a lot I can do. 741 00:50:31,320 --> 00:50:33,764 We're at the mercy of the computer. 742 00:50:33,822 --> 00:50:36,016 (STATIC OVER RADIO) 743 00:50:36,075 --> 00:50:38,644 - McCroskey, do you read me? Over. - McCROSKEY: Striker? 744 00:50:38,702 --> 00:50:42,272 - McCroskey! - Come in! You're fading out. Come in. Over. 745 00:50:42,331 --> 00:50:44,433 - Damn! Lost them again. - Could be sunspots. 746 00:50:44,500 --> 00:50:46,273 Could be your dishwashing detergent. 747 00:50:46,335 --> 00:50:50,030 Striker flew that 767 into Chicago years ago without a crew. 748 00:50:50,089 --> 00:50:54,285 Now, would somebody please tell me what in Sam Hill he's doing up there? 749 00:50:54,343 --> 00:50:57,538 The radio's gone dead. Elaine, try the emergency phone. 750 00:51:00,474 --> 00:51:01,700 Help us, please. 751 00:51:01,767 --> 00:51:02,914 (BEEPS) 752 00:51:02,977 --> 00:51:06,081 WOMAN (OVER PHONE): Thank you for calling the Mission Control emergency line. 753 00:51:06,146 --> 00:51:08,795 All our operators are busy, so please stand by. 754 00:51:08,857 --> 00:51:12,757 - Ted, it's a recording. - Let me have that. 755 00:51:12,820 --> 00:51:17,517 WOMAN: We said, all our operators are busy, so please stand by! 756 00:51:19,118 --> 00:51:22,472 I told you, Bud. The boys downtown are taking heat from Washington. 757 00:51:22,538 --> 00:51:25,141 You realize the president's gonna want an explanation. 758 00:51:25,207 --> 00:51:28,732 Bud, I told you, let the boys in Washington handle the president. 759 00:51:28,794 --> 00:51:30,237 Sorry to pull you out of bed. 760 00:51:30,296 --> 00:51:32,740 - Ah, forget it. I was reading. - What's the story? 761 00:51:32,798 --> 00:51:36,448 Uh, it's about an old man who catches this fish, but that's not important now. 762 00:51:36,510 --> 00:51:38,863 Sir, we have restored radio contact. 763 00:51:38,929 --> 00:51:40,872 Good. We keep losing their radio. 764 00:51:42,141 --> 00:51:45,245 McCroskey, give it to me straight. What's it look like? 765 00:51:45,311 --> 00:51:49,211 A radio? It's about so big, green, with numbers, lots of knobs. 766 00:51:49,273 --> 00:51:52,377 I mean the situation. What do your people think? 767 00:51:54,320 --> 00:51:56,422 MAN 1 (THINKING): They're screwed. 768 00:51:56,905 --> 00:51:59,007 MAN 2 (THINKING): They're dead. 769 00:51:59,867 --> 00:52:02,516 MAN 3 (THINKING): Did I leave the iron on? 770 00:52:08,751 --> 00:52:09,898 Come in, Control. 771 00:52:09,960 --> 00:52:12,529 McCROSKEY (OVER RADIO): Yeah, yeah. We read you. Come in. Over. 772 00:52:12,588 --> 00:52:15,362 McCroskey, I gotta be straight with you. 773 00:52:15,424 --> 00:52:18,698 I don't think there's any way I can regain control of this ship. 774 00:52:18,761 --> 00:52:21,910 Striker, this is Steve McCroskey, chief controller. 775 00:52:21,972 --> 00:52:24,450 Now, I want you to listen to me now and listen good. 776 00:52:24,516 --> 00:52:27,916 A few years ago, I helped a young pilot who I think we both remember... 777 00:52:27,978 --> 00:52:31,708 through a storm over Chicago. He said he couldn't do it too. 778 00:52:31,774 --> 00:52:36,129 But when the going got tough, that kid pulled it together. 779 00:52:36,195 --> 00:52:37,672 You might have read about him. 780 00:52:37,738 --> 00:52:41,843 He made all the big papers and the Canadian Jewish News. 781 00:52:41,909 --> 00:52:44,182 I don't know if that kid's still got it... 782 00:52:44,244 --> 00:52:47,063 but if he has, I know one thing... 783 00:52:47,122 --> 00:52:51,648 if he was up there now, he'd find a way to turn that bucket around... 784 00:52:51,710 --> 00:52:53,904 and get the hell out of there, pronto! 785 00:52:53,962 --> 00:52:57,862 I'm afraid you gave the wrong speech. I'm not your problem. It's the ship. 786 00:52:57,925 --> 00:53:00,653 The fire in the core made the computer go berserk. 787 00:53:00,719 --> 00:53:03,538 We've lost the crew, and we're locked en route to the sun. 788 00:53:03,597 --> 00:53:07,827 All right. Now here's what you do. Stay calm, keep an eye on those gauges. 789 00:53:07,893 --> 00:53:12,749 Things are going to start to heat up. We'll figure out some way around the computer. 790 00:53:12,815 --> 00:53:15,009 - What are we gonna do, Ted? - Elaine... 791 00:53:16,360 --> 00:53:18,963 we're going to have to blow the computer. 792 00:53:20,155 --> 00:53:21,381 Blow Rok? 793 00:53:25,828 --> 00:53:29,398 - That's right, Elaine. - Ted, there's no way you can do it. 794 00:53:29,456 --> 00:53:30,648 What do you mean? 795 00:53:30,708 --> 00:53:34,608 That computer has a self-defense mechanism. I don't know how we can get around it. 796 00:53:34,670 --> 00:53:38,195 We've already lost three men. I don't want to lose you too, Ted. 797 00:53:41,844 --> 00:53:44,197 Then I guess it's in God's hands now. 798 00:53:44,263 --> 00:53:47,367 I'm Father O'Flanagan. I'm a man of God. 799 00:53:47,433 --> 00:53:52,380 And you must trust me when I say it's very likely that we're all going to die. 800 00:53:52,438 --> 00:53:54,540 (ALL SCREAMING AND SHOUTING) 801 00:53:54,857 --> 00:53:56,379 (WHISTLE BLOWING) 802 00:54:15,252 --> 00:54:19,528 Our top story tonight, four-alarm fire rages through downtown Buffalo. 803 00:54:19,590 --> 00:54:24,537 Also in the news, lunar shuttle heads for the sun and certain disaster. 804 00:54:24,595 --> 00:54:29,075 Our top story tonight, four-alarm fire rages through downtown Tokyo. 805 00:54:29,141 --> 00:54:33,587 Also in the news, American lunar mission locked in death struggle. 806 00:54:33,645 --> 00:54:34,962 (GROWLING) 807 00:54:35,898 --> 00:54:42,096 A four-alarm fire in downtown Moscow clears way for a glorious new tractor factory. 808 00:54:42,154 --> 00:54:45,258 And on the lighter side of the news... 809 00:54:45,324 --> 00:54:50,225 hundreds of capitalists are soon to perish in shuttle disaster. 810 00:54:50,287 --> 00:54:55,268 If this country was run by vegetarian women rather than flesh-eating men... 811 00:54:55,334 --> 00:54:58,108 this whole space disaster would never have happened. 812 00:54:58,170 --> 00:55:00,864 Right now, we're working to raise the consciousness... 813 00:55:00,923 --> 00:55:04,368 of the vegetarian minorities with diet sensitivity training... 814 00:55:04,426 --> 00:55:07,871 so that people will be able to deal with the fal... 815 00:55:08,847 --> 00:55:11,120 The key to this whole thing is their computer. 816 00:55:11,183 --> 00:55:14,313 Until we can figure out a way to put that ship on manual, 817 00:55:14,339 --> 00:55:16,280 there's nothing we can do for them. 818 00:55:16,313 --> 00:55:19,007 - Get me that computer program. - Yes, sir. 819 00:55:19,066 --> 00:55:21,294 - Who's in charge here? - McCroskey, Control. 820 00:55:21,360 --> 00:55:23,713 - Hallick, Homicide. - Jacobs, Sagittarius. 821 00:55:23,779 --> 00:55:26,974 What's your problem? We've got a few our own, so make it good. 822 00:55:27,032 --> 00:55:29,681 One of your passengers is carrying a bomb. 823 00:55:29,785 --> 00:55:32,855 - That's a good one. - Passenger's name is Joe Salucci. 824 00:55:32,913 --> 00:55:35,141 He was supposed to fly to Des Moines for an operation. 825 00:55:35,207 --> 00:55:36,854 Something to do with sexual impotence. 826 00:55:36,917 --> 00:55:39,361 - The Des Moines Institute? - You know it. 827 00:55:39,461 --> 00:55:41,734 ALL (IN UNISON): We're familiar with it. 828 00:55:41,797 --> 00:55:45,447 Joe gave his wife this insurance policy then he got on the shuttle. 829 00:55:45,509 --> 00:55:47,657 Mrs. Salucci thinks he might be suicidal. 830 00:55:47,719 --> 00:55:50,663 So we had the boys in Psychiatry do a profile on him. 831 00:55:52,724 --> 00:55:56,670 - Yeah, that looks pretty bad. - It's not his good side. 832 00:55:56,728 --> 00:56:00,924 Now, the way I read it, blowing up a plane in space... 833 00:56:00,983 --> 00:56:03,836 leaves no traces for the insurance investigators. 834 00:56:03,902 --> 00:56:06,130 This is a $1 million policy. 835 00:56:07,030 --> 00:56:08,347 (BOTH WHISTLE) 836 00:56:08,407 --> 00:56:10,760 Wait a minute. 837 00:56:10,826 --> 00:56:14,430 - This is auto insurance! - That's why we're worried, gentlemen. 838 00:56:14,496 --> 00:56:18,191 This clown's impotent, suicidal and incredibly stupid. 839 00:56:18,250 --> 00:56:20,944 And that spells trouble in my book. 840 00:56:21,003 --> 00:56:22,776 Oh, yeah? 841 00:56:22,838 --> 00:56:25,441 Trouble. Trouble. 842 00:56:25,507 --> 00:56:28,702 - Stinson, give me those Mayflower plans. - Yes, sir. 843 00:56:28,760 --> 00:56:33,081 - You, clear that table in there. - I'll get the cards and the bridge mix. 844 00:56:36,101 --> 00:56:38,954 And somebody get me the sarge. 845 00:56:51,867 --> 00:56:54,971 The heat in this cockpit is getting unbearable. 846 00:56:55,579 --> 00:56:58,933 You can fry an egg on this control panel. 847 00:57:03,295 --> 00:57:06,274 Ted, I don't know what's going to happen to us... 848 00:57:06,340 --> 00:57:09,990 but I want you to know now I love you and always will. 849 00:57:10,886 --> 00:57:12,203 (RADIO BUZZES) 850 00:57:12,721 --> 00:57:15,244 That might be the news we've been waiting for. 851 00:57:15,307 --> 00:57:17,125 This is Mayflower 1. Over. 852 00:57:17,184 --> 00:57:19,002 McCROSKEY: Striker, I got some news for you. 853 00:57:19,061 --> 00:57:20,458 Roger. 854 00:57:20,520 --> 00:57:23,169 You got a passenger aboard named Joe Salucci. 855 00:57:23,231 --> 00:57:25,754 - He's carrying a bomb. - A bo...? Ah! 856 00:57:25,817 --> 00:57:29,262 No, not a "bo," a bomb. Do you hear me, Striker? 857 00:57:29,321 --> 00:57:32,140 Yeah, I heard you, McCroskey, but what am I supposed to do? 858 00:57:32,199 --> 00:57:36,429 Get that bomb. I don't care how. But get it. That's our top priority. 859 00:57:36,495 --> 00:57:38,723 All the other problems can just wait. 860 00:57:42,292 --> 00:57:44,815 As if we don't have enough problems already. 861 00:57:47,631 --> 00:57:49,733 You'd better fasten your seat belt. 862 00:57:49,800 --> 00:57:50,947 (CHATTERING) 863 00:57:51,385 --> 00:57:53,658 You're gonna have to put your cigarette out. 864 00:57:53,720 --> 00:57:55,322 Okay. 865 00:57:56,431 --> 00:57:58,784 (PASSENGERS SCREAMING) 866 00:58:07,651 --> 00:58:10,049 - Mary. - Yes? 867 00:58:10,112 --> 00:58:13,762 - Which passenger is Joe Salucci? - Sixteen-C. Why? 868 00:58:13,824 --> 00:58:15,767 - He's carrying a bomb. - A bo...? 869 00:58:15,826 --> 00:58:18,270 No, not a "bo," a bomb. 870 00:58:18,328 --> 00:58:22,228 Now, as discreetly as possible, I want you to move the passengers into the lounge. 871 00:58:22,332 --> 00:58:24,855 - We don't have a lounge. - TED: That's not important now. 872 00:58:24,918 --> 00:58:27,862 What you've gotta do is get those people away from that bomb. 873 00:58:27,921 --> 00:58:29,398 - What should I say? - Anything. 874 00:58:29,464 --> 00:58:31,987 Just don't let Salucci think we're on to him. 875 00:58:32,050 --> 00:58:34,152 I'll do my best. 876 00:58:43,353 --> 00:58:46,252 Attention, ladies and gentlemen, please. 877 00:58:46,314 --> 00:58:50,760 Would everybody move to the lounge who is not carrying a bomb. 878 00:58:50,819 --> 00:58:52,136 (ALL SHRIEK) 879 00:58:52,446 --> 00:58:53,593 Don't move! 880 00:58:53,655 --> 00:58:56,224 Mr. Salucci, they know about you back home. 881 00:58:56,283 --> 00:58:57,635 Stay where you are! 882 00:58:57,743 --> 00:59:01,017 Joe, you don't want to blow that thing and kill all these people. 883 00:59:01,079 --> 00:59:05,810 - I don't care about them. - Joe, listen to me. It's hopeless. 884 00:59:05,876 --> 00:59:09,401 No one's ever gotten away with a stunt like this before. 885 00:59:09,504 --> 00:59:11,481 (BOMB TICKING) 886 00:59:13,967 --> 00:59:16,195 Joe, the insurance is worthless now. 887 00:59:16,261 --> 00:59:20,366 - I don't believe you. - Joe, you've got to trust me. 888 00:59:28,565 --> 00:59:32,761 No one's gonna hurt you. No one has to know about your problem. 889 00:59:32,819 --> 00:59:37,299 - No one has to know you're impotent. - Don't say that word! 890 00:59:50,712 --> 00:59:52,564 Scraps! 891 01:00:05,769 --> 01:00:07,462 (ALL LAUGHING) 892 01:00:08,605 --> 01:00:10,332 Nice going, Striker! Nice going! 893 01:00:10,398 --> 01:00:14,002 We may not be out of the woods yet, but you got rid of that bomb. 894 01:00:14,069 --> 01:00:15,512 Not exactly, McCroskey. 895 01:00:15,570 --> 01:00:17,217 McCROSKEY: What do you mean not exactly? 896 01:00:17,280 --> 01:00:21,726 - The bomb's right here beside me. - There, beside you in the cockpit? 897 01:00:23,286 --> 01:00:25,013 Striker. 898 01:00:26,289 --> 01:00:27,936 What the hell are you doing up there? 899 01:00:27,999 --> 01:00:30,193 TED: I got an idea. It might just work. 900 01:00:30,252 --> 01:00:33,447 It's a long shot, but it's the only shot we've got. 901 01:00:33,505 --> 01:00:35,824 I want to use the bomb to blow the computer. 902 01:00:35,882 --> 01:00:39,907 Striker, you've got to be crazy to try a stunt like that. 903 01:00:40,887 --> 01:00:44,537 You may be right, McCroskey, but it's the only chance we've got. 904 01:00:44,599 --> 01:00:47,578 When that bomb blows, we're gonna lose our oxygen fast. 905 01:00:47,644 --> 01:00:50,588 I'm gonna have to get this ship out of here as quick as I can. 906 01:00:50,647 --> 01:00:54,718 - I'm taking her to 0.5 warp. - Zero-point-five warp? 907 01:00:54,776 --> 01:00:57,174 Zero-point-five warp. 908 01:00:57,237 --> 01:01:00,762 I test-piloted this shuttle, I know exactly what it can do. 909 01:01:00,824 --> 01:01:04,770 Striker, listen to me now and listen good. 910 01:01:04,828 --> 01:01:09,525 That thing is bound to come apart on you at that speed, and that's no good. 911 01:01:09,583 --> 01:01:12,903 It's gotta be in one piece when you land on the moon. 912 01:01:12,961 --> 01:01:15,940 You know damn well that that warp drive has never been tested! 913 01:01:16,006 --> 01:01:17,153 Ah! 914 01:01:17,215 --> 01:01:21,195 You're putting yourself and everybody else on that ship in jeopardy! 915 01:01:21,303 --> 01:01:22,450 (BUZZER BUZZES) 916 01:01:22,512 --> 01:01:24,410 - MAN: Over here! - All right, contestant 38. 917 01:01:24,472 --> 01:01:27,075 Bart, I'll take air shuttle disasters for 40. 918 01:01:27,142 --> 01:01:30,712 The answer is the Mayflower. 919 01:01:30,770 --> 01:01:33,589 Ted, what are you going to do? 920 01:01:34,232 --> 01:01:36,676 Elaine, I'm going back there with the bomb. 921 01:01:36,776 --> 01:01:40,301 Ted, you're my hero. 922 01:01:40,947 --> 01:01:43,891 Ted. The bomb. 923 01:01:43,950 --> 01:01:45,848 (BOMB TICKING) 924 01:01:47,954 --> 01:01:51,479 Ted. Be careful. 925 01:01:55,212 --> 01:02:01,115 Now, listen good. If you got any ideas, now is the time. I want to hear them. 926 01:02:01,176 --> 01:02:03,995 How about a game show like Hollywood Squares but with kids? 927 01:02:04,054 --> 01:02:05,656 Gary Coleman could host. 928 01:02:05,722 --> 01:02:07,244 (COMPUTER BEEPING) 929 01:02:07,307 --> 01:02:09,034 (GAS MASK HISSING) 930 01:02:17,275 --> 01:02:18,877 (BEEP) 931 01:02:21,613 --> 01:02:23,340 (BEEP) 932 01:02:36,628 --> 01:02:38,150 (BOMB TICKING) 933 01:02:51,643 --> 01:02:53,541 (BEEPING) 934 01:03:06,283 --> 01:03:10,229 - Ted, Ted, Simon just ejected. - Sit down, Elaine. 935 01:03:10,287 --> 01:03:12,810 If this bomb trick works, we might make it. 936 01:03:12,872 --> 01:03:15,316 - Simon was a fool to eject now. - You mean...? 937 01:03:15,375 --> 01:03:19,901 That's right. Premature ejection. 938 01:03:20,797 --> 01:03:22,865 Striker, listen to me now and listen good. 939 01:03:22,924 --> 01:03:25,368 You're gonna be on lunar radio range any second. 940 01:03:25,427 --> 01:03:27,495 The next transmission that you receive... 941 01:03:27,554 --> 01:03:30,783 will be from Buck Murdock at Alpha Beta Base. 942 01:03:31,641 --> 01:03:35,587 - Not Buck Murdock? - McCROSKEY: No. Buck Murdock. 943 01:03:35,645 --> 01:03:37,341 Who's Buck Murdock, Ted? 944 01:03:37,342 --> 01:03:40,992 Just a guy I flew with during the war, Elaine. 945 01:03:41,026 --> 01:03:44,175 He was with us that day I led the raid over Macho Grande. 946 01:03:44,237 --> 01:03:46,465 And he's still alive? 947 01:03:48,616 --> 01:03:52,437 Striker, son, we're all betting on you. 948 01:03:52,495 --> 01:03:54,347 MAN 1: I'll take 5-to-1 they all die. 949 01:03:54,414 --> 01:03:57,017 MAN 2: 8-to-5 the women and children make it. 950 01:03:57,083 --> 01:03:59,732 MAN 3: 6-to-4 they lose the crew. 951 01:03:59,794 --> 01:04:00,952 Zero-point-five warp. 952 01:04:00,953 --> 01:04:04,345 God help them. Nobody's ever traveled at that speed before. 953 01:04:04,382 --> 01:04:06,780 Last spring, we did Europe in nine days. 954 01:04:06,843 --> 01:04:09,992 And then we went to Bakersfield and then we ended up in Fresno. 955 01:04:10,055 --> 01:04:12,829 Fresno? No one goes to Fresno anymore. 956 01:04:23,318 --> 01:04:25,091 (TICKING) 957 01:04:25,153 --> 01:04:26,675 (BEEPING) 958 01:04:29,574 --> 01:04:31,426 MAN: All communication lines are clear. 959 01:04:31,493 --> 01:04:35,063 We're ready to transfer to Buck Murdock at Alpha Beta. Over. 960 01:04:37,332 --> 01:04:38,900 Gentlemen... 961 01:04:38,958 --> 01:04:42,938 I don't find it easy to talk at a time like this... 962 01:04:44,589 --> 01:04:47,192 but I gotta say something about that guy up there... 963 01:04:47,258 --> 01:04:50,237 and I can sum it all up in just one word: 964 01:04:50,303 --> 01:04:54,874 courage, dedication, daring, pride, pluck, spirit, grit, mettle... 965 01:04:54,933 --> 01:05:00,130 and G-U-T-S, guts! 966 01:05:00,188 --> 01:05:02,632 Ted Striker's got more guts in his little finger... 967 01:05:02,690 --> 01:05:06,795 than most of us have in our large intestine, including the colon! 968 01:05:08,446 --> 01:05:13,928 When we're ready, we would like you to remove your eyeglasses and your shoes... 969 01:05:13,993 --> 01:05:16,471 and place your head between the knees. 970 01:05:16,538 --> 01:05:18,857 Between your own knees, Father. 971 01:05:18,915 --> 01:05:21,017 (ALL CHATTERING) 972 01:05:22,168 --> 01:05:24,270 (BEEPING) 973 01:05:30,718 --> 01:05:33,617 We've blown the computer. 974 01:05:36,141 --> 01:05:38,414 Elaine, you'd better check the readout. 975 01:05:43,982 --> 01:05:45,425 We're slowing down. 976 01:05:48,445 --> 01:05:52,049 - Okay. Set course change. - Set. 977 01:05:52,157 --> 01:05:55,431 - Compute. - Compute. 978 01:05:55,785 --> 01:05:57,512 (BRAKES SCREECH) 979 01:05:59,789 --> 01:06:04,190 Okay, here goes. 980 01:06:10,925 --> 01:06:12,242 (PANEL BEEPING) 981 01:06:12,635 --> 01:06:17,036 Elaine, we hit 0.5 warp, and everything seems okay. 982 01:06:21,144 --> 01:06:22,461 We've got gravity control back. 983 01:06:22,520 --> 01:06:23,667 (THUD) 984 01:06:25,773 --> 01:06:26,965 Sorry. 985 01:06:35,575 --> 01:06:38,645 Elaine, you'd better brace yourself. 986 01:06:38,703 --> 01:06:41,932 This is faster than man has ever traveled before. 987 01:06:47,170 --> 01:06:49,898 Oh, wow. 988 01:06:52,634 --> 01:06:57,615 In case some of you are wondering, we are traveling one half the speed of light. 989 01:06:57,680 --> 01:07:01,284 Some of you might experience a temporary metabolic change... 990 01:07:01,351 --> 01:07:05,672 but there's nothing to worry about. Thank you. 991 01:07:05,897 --> 01:07:07,590 (CRICKETS CHIRPING) 992 01:07:09,442 --> 01:07:11,965 (WOLF HOWLS IN DISTANCE) 993 01:07:12,237 --> 01:07:14,465 (FROGS CROAKING) 994 01:07:17,700 --> 01:07:19,017 Shh. 995 01:07:23,831 --> 01:07:25,729 Shh. 996 01:07:26,501 --> 01:07:28,319 Shh. 997 01:07:37,554 --> 01:07:40,624 - Commander Murdock. - What is it, lieutenant? 998 01:07:40,682 --> 01:07:44,252 Sir, the Mayflower's in trouble. She's coming in hotter than a firecracker. 999 01:07:44,310 --> 01:07:47,789 Their computer's down. They've lost their crew. They're on manual. 1000 01:07:47,855 --> 01:07:50,879 - We'd better get to the tower. - We have no tower, sir. 1001 01:07:51,568 --> 01:07:54,171 - No tower? - Just a bridge, sir. 1002 01:07:54,237 --> 01:07:57,716 Why the hell aren't I notified about these things? 1003 01:07:57,782 --> 01:08:01,477 Lieutenant, how would you handle this? 1004 01:08:01,536 --> 01:08:05,106 - We could try ignoring it, sir. - I see. 1005 01:08:05,164 --> 01:08:08,689 Pretend nothing's happened and hope everything's all right in the morning. 1006 01:08:08,751 --> 01:08:11,024 - Just a thought, sir. - I've considered that. 1007 01:08:11,087 --> 01:08:14,031 There's got to be a better angle. Shh. 1008 01:08:16,551 --> 01:08:18,244 Shh. 1009 01:08:18,303 --> 01:08:22,408 If they've lost their crew and are on manual, who's in control of that bucket? 1010 01:08:22,473 --> 01:08:26,453 - Some guy by the name Ted Striker, sir. - Ted Striker. 1011 01:08:26,519 --> 01:08:28,462 - Do you know him? - Never heard of him. 1012 01:08:28,521 --> 01:08:32,501 That's not exactly true. We were like brothers. 1013 01:08:32,567 --> 01:08:35,295 We flew together during the war. 1014 01:08:35,361 --> 01:08:38,260 We were close, real close, until... 1015 01:08:38,323 --> 01:08:41,597 - Until, sir? - Until that day over Macho Grande. 1016 01:08:41,659 --> 01:08:45,480 - Over Macho Grande, sir? - No, I'm afraid I'll never get over Macho Grande. 1017 01:08:45,538 --> 01:08:48,391 Forget it, lieutenant. It wasn't a pretty picture. Let's go. 1018 01:08:48,458 --> 01:08:50,151 Right, sir. 1019 01:08:50,209 --> 01:08:52,937 Shh. Shh. 1020 01:08:53,921 --> 01:08:57,696 - What have you found? - These red lights keep moving back and forth. 1021 01:08:57,759 --> 01:09:00,453 This thing seems to have no other function whatsoever. 1022 01:09:00,511 --> 01:09:02,784 That's impossible. It must have some function. 1023 01:09:02,847 --> 01:09:05,516 Why would the government put all that money into a thing 1024 01:09:05,542 --> 01:09:07,227 with lights that go back and forth? 1025 01:09:07,268 --> 01:09:10,622 Sir, these lights keep blinking out of sequence, sir. 1026 01:09:10,688 --> 01:09:13,917 - What should we do about it, sir? - Get them to blink in sequence. 1027 01:09:13,983 --> 01:09:15,130 You. 1028 01:09:15,193 --> 01:09:17,762 - Rorschach, what do you got? - We've run these tests. 1029 01:09:17,820 --> 01:09:19,718 Thank you. What do you make of these? 1030 01:09:19,781 --> 01:09:22,555 That's a bird. That's a cow. That's a horse with a hat on. 1031 01:09:22,617 --> 01:09:24,344 Sir, I pulled Ted Striker's record. 1032 01:09:24,410 --> 01:09:26,558 - And? - I don't think you're going to like it. 1033 01:09:26,621 --> 01:09:30,567 - My God. That's worse than I thought. - MAN: Sir? 1034 01:09:31,250 --> 01:09:34,695 They should hit our atmosphere in 3 minutes. How do you want to play it? 1035 01:09:34,754 --> 01:09:39,234 I want a 6-foot trench dug around the entire base. Fill it with gasoline. 1036 01:09:39,300 --> 01:09:40,447 - You. - Yes, sir. 1037 01:09:40,510 --> 01:09:42,578 Get the women and children to the shelters. 1038 01:09:42,637 --> 01:09:44,535 - Contact the Japanese ambassador. - Sir. 1039 01:09:44,597 --> 01:09:46,870 - Rorschach, get me a complete file... - Yes sir. 1040 01:09:46,933 --> 01:09:49,627 on everyone who's seen The Sound of Music more than four times. 1041 01:09:49,686 --> 01:09:50,833 Yes, sir. 1042 01:09:50,895 --> 01:09:52,963 On second thought, kill those orders. 1043 01:09:53,022 --> 01:09:54,419 Down scope. 1044 01:09:54,482 --> 01:09:56,255 (HORN WAILS) 1045 01:09:57,985 --> 01:10:01,180 Fate can play a strange game sometimes, lieutenant. 1046 01:10:01,239 --> 01:10:02,841 Fate, sir? 1047 01:10:02,907 --> 01:10:07,854 Striker wipes out his entire squadron over Macho Grande... 1048 01:10:07,912 --> 01:10:11,687 and now those people's lives up there are in his hands. 1049 01:10:12,750 --> 01:10:17,105 I guess irony can be pretty ironic sometimes. 1050 01:10:18,339 --> 01:10:20,908 But it's his ship now. 1051 01:10:20,967 --> 01:10:23,536 He's the top dog... 1052 01:10:23,594 --> 01:10:25,662 the big man... 1053 01:10:25,722 --> 01:10:29,326 numero uno honcho... 1054 01:10:30,226 --> 01:10:32,545 the head cheese. 1055 01:10:41,696 --> 01:10:44,970 I just hope he has the right stuff. Up scope. 1056 01:10:45,032 --> 01:10:46,725 Sir, we have radio contact. 1057 01:10:51,330 --> 01:10:54,309 Yes, I'll take care of it right away. 1058 01:10:54,375 --> 01:10:56,694 Uh, sir, we've had some problems with the ship. 1059 01:10:56,753 --> 01:10:59,026 If you're going to use the washroom, please be careful. 1060 01:10:59,088 --> 01:11:00,565 Oh, thank you. 1061 01:11:00,631 --> 01:11:04,656 - Oh. I have been on my feet all day. - Oh. 1062 01:11:04,719 --> 01:11:07,242 I sure could use a little breather. 1063 01:11:12,518 --> 01:11:15,212 MURDOCK (OVER RADIO): Striker, this is Buck Murdock on Alpha Beta. 1064 01:11:15,271 --> 01:11:18,090 - Do you read me? Over. - I read you, Murdock. 1065 01:11:18,149 --> 01:11:21,628 Hope he's not still bitter about what happened between us during the war. 1066 01:11:21,694 --> 01:11:25,094 If it weren't for those people up there, I'd say let Striker go down... 1067 01:11:25,156 --> 01:11:28,100 in a fiery, twisted mass of molten metal. 1068 01:11:29,827 --> 01:11:33,147 Okay, Striker, let's just pray you don't screw up here... 1069 01:11:33,206 --> 01:11:35,058 like you did over Macho Grande. 1070 01:11:35,166 --> 01:11:37,314 - So just follow orders. - Roger. 1071 01:11:37,376 --> 01:11:40,525 We've got you locked on beam. Get ready to kill auxiliary engines. 1072 01:11:40,588 --> 01:11:41,780 Roger, Murdock. 1073 01:11:41,839 --> 01:11:46,570 All right, Striker, kill the auxiliary engines. 1074 01:11:48,095 --> 01:11:49,913 Ted, the lever! 1075 01:11:50,014 --> 01:11:53,414 Murdock, the lever just came off in my hand. We're still at warp. 1076 01:11:53,476 --> 01:11:55,453 Try another lever. 1077 01:11:55,937 --> 01:11:57,880 There are no more levers, just switches. 1078 01:11:57,939 --> 01:12:01,760 - No buttons? - No, just switches, lights and knobs. 1079 01:12:01,818 --> 01:12:05,138 Oh, cut the bleeding-heart crap, will you? 1080 01:12:05,196 --> 01:12:08,049 We've all got our switches, lights and knobs to deal with. 1081 01:12:08,115 --> 01:12:11,185 I mean, down here, there are literally hundreds and thousands... 1082 01:12:11,244 --> 01:12:13,597 of blinking, beeping and flashing lights. 1083 01:12:13,663 --> 01:12:18,394 Blinking and beeping and flashing. They're flashing and they're beeping. 1084 01:12:18,459 --> 01:12:21,608 I can't stand it anymore! They're blinking and beeping and flashing! 1085 01:12:21,671 --> 01:12:26,493 - Pull yourself together, sir! - I'm all right. I'm all right. 1086 01:12:26,551 --> 01:12:28,449 All right, Striker. 1087 01:12:28,511 --> 01:12:32,491 You're gonna have to pull that lever panel off. Do you understand? 1088 01:12:32,557 --> 01:12:34,910 - Just rip it off. - Roger. 1089 01:12:34,976 --> 01:12:36,999 Elaine, screwdriver. 1090 01:12:57,832 --> 01:13:02,312 - Okay, the panel's off. - Find a piece of metal and shove it in there. 1091 01:13:02,378 --> 01:13:06,699 - A piece of metal? - Hurry, Striker! Any piece of metal will do. 1092 01:13:06,757 --> 01:13:10,703 I'd give my right arm to get a piece of metal from this room up to that poor boob. 1093 01:13:10,761 --> 01:13:14,240 I mean, here we are surrounded by metal, and it's useless. 1094 01:13:14,307 --> 01:13:18,378 Might as well write them off. Let's close up the bridge. 1095 01:13:18,436 --> 01:13:20,538 Let's get out of here. 1096 01:13:20,605 --> 01:13:22,332 Close it up. Lights out. 1097 01:13:22,398 --> 01:13:23,590 (MACHINES POWERING OFF) 1098 01:13:23,649 --> 01:13:27,379 Where am I going to find a piece of metal here? 1099 01:13:27,445 --> 01:13:31,550 In space? At this hour? 1100 01:13:53,054 --> 01:13:54,872 ELAINE: Will this work, Ted? 1101 01:13:58,267 --> 01:14:00,369 Thanks. 1102 01:14:03,022 --> 01:14:06,467 Hold it, Murdock. I think I've got something that might work. 1103 01:14:06,525 --> 01:14:10,129 - Wait. - TED: A bobby pin. 1104 01:14:10,196 --> 01:14:14,927 Bobby pin? What the hell's a man doing with a bobby pin? 1105 01:14:15,618 --> 01:14:16,765 Hmm. 1106 01:14:17,578 --> 01:14:19,680 Lights on. 1107 01:14:21,332 --> 01:14:24,982 All right, Striker, if a bobby pin's all you got, it'll have to do. 1108 01:14:25,044 --> 01:14:28,398 Just shove it in there, you're gonna have to short that thing out. 1109 01:14:37,890 --> 01:14:40,084 Ted, it's working. 1110 01:14:40,142 --> 01:14:43,997 We're losing speed. But she feels like she's going to break up at any second. 1111 01:14:44,063 --> 01:14:45,380 (CHATTERING) 1112 01:14:45,940 --> 01:14:49,670 - She's starting to shake. - She's starting to shake. 1113 01:14:53,072 --> 01:14:56,802 - She's starting to shimmy. - She's starting to shimmy. 1114 01:14:58,869 --> 01:15:03,190 She's starting to... She's starting to, uh... 1115 01:15:05,459 --> 01:15:09,985 What? What? What is she starting to do? Striker, what is she starting to do? 1116 01:15:10,047 --> 01:15:13,242 - Shudder, Ted? - She's starting to shudder. 1117 01:15:13,300 --> 01:15:14,777 She's starting to shudder. 1118 01:15:14,844 --> 01:15:15,991 How bad is it, sir? 1119 01:15:16,053 --> 01:15:19,032 It's not good, but at least she's not beginning crack up. 1120 01:15:20,766 --> 01:15:22,243 She's beginning to crack up. 1121 01:15:22,309 --> 01:15:25,913 (ALL SCREAMING) 1122 01:15:32,820 --> 01:15:36,265 Quiet! Quiet! 1123 01:15:36,323 --> 01:15:40,018 We're monitoring you all the way, Striker. Keep her nose up. Don't fight her. 1124 01:15:40,077 --> 01:15:43,522 I'm trying, but she's fighting me! 1125 01:15:46,667 --> 01:15:48,769 Ted, there's Alpha Beta. 1126 01:15:50,838 --> 01:15:54,659 Elaine, we're going to have to come in pretty low to land this thing. 1127 01:15:54,717 --> 01:15:58,492 - Is that difficult, Ted? - Sure, it's difficult. 1128 01:15:58,554 --> 01:16:02,033 Coming in low is part of every textbook approach. 1129 01:16:02,099 --> 01:16:05,373 It's just something you have to do when you land. 1130 01:16:06,103 --> 01:16:07,705 Huh? 1131 01:16:12,651 --> 01:16:16,404 Striker, we don't have a hell of a lot of time, but I want to tell you this. 1132 01:16:16,430 --> 01:16:17,452 You pull this off... 1133 01:16:17,490 --> 01:16:21,766 and there's gonna be a lot of people just might forget that Macho Grande ever happened. 1134 01:16:21,827 --> 01:16:24,350 We're gonna get her down and down safe. 1135 01:16:27,208 --> 01:16:32,405 Striker, before we go any further, there's one very important thing you should know. 1136 01:16:32,463 --> 01:16:35,362 Ted, slow down! The base is straight ahead. 1137 01:16:35,424 --> 01:16:39,028 They've just hooked into a radio communications satellite... 1138 01:16:39,095 --> 01:16:44,873 and as we speak, our transmissions are being broadcast all over the world. 1139 01:16:44,934 --> 01:16:48,129 Billions of people are hanging on our every word. 1140 01:16:48,187 --> 01:16:53,293 The eyes, ears, noses and throats of every American are on you, Ted... 1141 01:16:53,359 --> 01:16:54,631 (ALL SHOUTING AND SCREAMING) 1142 01:16:54,693 --> 01:16:56,795 each one of them hoping and praying... 1143 01:16:56,862 --> 01:17:01,934 that you could put that ship down on the ground in one piece. 1144 01:17:01,992 --> 01:17:03,685 Ted, we're not stopping. 1145 01:17:05,204 --> 01:17:09,650 Now, Striker, start by positioning your landing gear. 1146 01:17:09,708 --> 01:17:13,108 Lower your flaps. 1147 01:17:13,170 --> 01:17:14,362 Just keep her level. 1148 01:17:17,383 --> 01:17:22,034 There's no looking back. Put on your horizon sensor and level her off. 1149 01:17:29,812 --> 01:17:31,710 Ted, we're going back up. 1150 01:17:33,691 --> 01:17:37,716 Elaine, you'd better get ready for this landing. 1151 01:17:39,989 --> 01:17:42,888 MURDOCK (OVER RADIO): Keep up your stabilizers. Don't lose control. 1152 01:17:42,950 --> 01:17:45,803 Now fire both those jets and hang on with both hands. 1153 01:17:45,870 --> 01:17:50,020 I said, both hands, damn it! I'll tell you one thing, Striker... 1154 01:17:50,082 --> 01:17:53,777 you bring down that flying hunk of junk, you're okay in my book. 1155 01:18:02,761 --> 01:18:05,614 Don't fight her, Striker. Hold her steady. Hold her up. 1156 01:18:12,938 --> 01:18:14,460 (CHATTERING) 1157 01:18:15,024 --> 01:18:18,094 I hope you enjoyed your flight. 1158 01:18:18,777 --> 01:18:21,471 Fly Pan Universe again. 1159 01:18:25,242 --> 01:18:26,935 (YELLS) 1160 01:18:27,828 --> 01:18:30,147 MURDOCK (OVER RADIO): You gotta hit the center of that strip. 1161 01:18:30,206 --> 01:18:32,400 One or two feet off, you're a dead duck. 1162 01:18:34,919 --> 01:18:37,021 - Let's go home. - Heh. 1163 01:18:38,964 --> 01:18:42,238 Yes, thank you for flying Pan Universe. 1164 01:18:42,301 --> 01:18:45,029 Have a nice stay. 1165 01:18:46,305 --> 01:18:48,282 Hope you enjoyed your flight. 1166 01:18:57,107 --> 01:18:58,925 Shift those turbo chargers. 1167 01:18:58,984 --> 01:19:02,088 Now check the sensors. Deploy your secondary boosters. 1168 01:19:02,154 --> 01:19:03,471 (SIREN WAILING) 1169 01:19:05,032 --> 01:19:07,351 MAN: Is there a courtesy phone around here? 1170 01:19:07,409 --> 01:19:09,261 Hello. We'd like you to have this flower. 1171 01:19:09,328 --> 01:19:13,274 We're with the Church of Lunar Consciousness. Would you like to make a donation? 1172 01:19:13,332 --> 01:19:18,188 Hello. We'd like you to have this flower. Would you like to make a donation? 1173 01:19:28,097 --> 01:19:31,371 MURDOCK (OVER RADIO): You're almost home. Hold her. Hold her. 1174 01:19:31,433 --> 01:19:35,583 Stay with her, Striker. Stay with her. It takes a soft touch. 1175 01:19:35,646 --> 01:19:39,467 Don't let her get away from you this time, Striker. 1176 01:19:52,371 --> 01:19:54,565 I don't know if this is a good time to ask... 1177 01:19:54,623 --> 01:19:57,977 but would it be possible for me to get my briefcase back? 1178 01:20:03,465 --> 01:20:06,444 - Striker. Striker! - Unh! 1179 01:20:08,637 --> 01:20:10,580 Ted Striker? 1180 01:20:11,015 --> 01:20:13,459 Do you know what it's like to laugh like that? 1181 01:20:13,517 --> 01:20:16,336 Yes. Yes, I do. 1182 01:20:16,770 --> 01:20:21,421 What did he get for telling the truth? A one-way ticket to the funny farm. 1183 01:20:22,026 --> 01:20:24,879 - Des Moines Institute. - Then you know it. 1184 01:20:24,945 --> 01:20:27,343 BOTH (IN UNISON): We're familiar with it. 1185 01:20:27,948 --> 01:20:32,519 I'm gonna get Ted. Just don't come apart on me now. 1186 01:20:35,456 --> 01:20:38,560 Jimmy, do you like it when Scraps holds on to your leg... 1187 01:20:38,625 --> 01:20:41,478 and rubs up and down? 1188 01:20:42,421 --> 01:20:44,489 You were gassed by Rok? 1189 01:20:44,548 --> 01:20:47,618 - I got it! I got it! Ha, ha! - Ha, ha! 1190 01:20:53,640 --> 01:20:56,744 Captain, your navigator, Mr. Unger, and first officer, Mr. Dunn. 1191 01:20:56,810 --> 01:20:57,957 - Unger. - Oveur. 1192 01:20:58,020 --> 01:20:59,417 - Oveur. - Dunn. 1193 01:20:59,521 --> 01:21:02,420 - We better get to the tower. - We have no tower, sir. 1194 01:21:02,483 --> 01:21:05,678 - No tower? - Just a bridge, sir. 1195 01:21:05,736 --> 01:21:08,965 Why the hell aren't I notified about these things? 1196 01:21:09,365 --> 01:21:12,890 Lieutenant, how would you handle this? 1197 01:21:13,827 --> 01:21:16,476 I want to know absolutely everything that's happened up till now. 1198 01:21:16,538 --> 01:21:19,391 Well, let's see. First, the Earth cooled. 1199 01:21:19,458 --> 01:21:24,735 And then the dinosaurs came, but they got too big and fat and died and turned into oil. 1200 01:21:24,797 --> 01:21:27,650 And then the Arabs came and bought Mercedes-Benzes. 1201 01:21:27,716 --> 01:21:29,989 Give the court your impression of Mr. Striker. 1202 01:21:30,052 --> 01:21:32,826 I don't do impressions. My training is in Psychiatry. 1203 01:21:32,888 --> 01:21:34,160 Of course. 1204 01:21:34,223 --> 01:21:38,499 Do you swear on the Constitution to tell the truth, so help you God? 1205 01:21:38,644 --> 01:21:40,212 Ain't no thing. 1206 01:21:41,480 --> 01:21:45,050 - The second time bomb on your right. - Certainly. 1207 01:23:55,155 --> 01:23:59,260 That's exactly what they'll be expecting us to do. 1208 01:24:10,128 --> 01:24:12,230 (English - US - SDH)