In 1972, a crack commando unit...
was sent to prison by a military court...
for a crime they didn't commit.
These men promptly escaped...
from a maximum-security stockade...
to the Los Angeles underground.
Today, still wanted by the government...
they survive as soldiers of fortune.
If you have a problem, if no one else can help...
and if you can find them...
maybe you can hire the A-Team.
Where did you get this? This belongs to Brian Lefcourt.
He owns some of the biggest newspapers in the world.
Let's get back to this lost city stuff.
There wouldn't happen to be some lost treasure in this lost city, would there?
Are you the jackass that calls himself "The Coffin"?
Yes, señor. El Cajon.
This Señor Lefcourt, you have come...
all this way with these powerful weapons to find him?
I'll ask the questions.
In that case, adiós, señor.
- So, you had a little surprise for me, huh? - No, I don't.
You ought to get some plastic cartridges.
You can't go swimming with those paper-wrapped.
We want to know about Brian. Is he all right?
I'm sure you will see him soon enough, chiquita.
Their weapons are no good, Doyle.
Shall we drop the weapons, gentlemen?
Might as well. She pulled the firing pins, guys.
I will have to make one more trip.
There was to be no more trips.
What is one more trip among friends?
Under the circumstances, I do not think you have much to complain about.
Continue down river and unload these supplies.
Then get back to Cajon's camp and wait for my instructions.
I will not forget what happened back there.
Good.
Good morning, J.B. How were the dailies?
Do you really know where the lost city of Del Rio is?
Doyle has been trying to get me to talk for days.
The only reason he's keeping me alive is 'cause I haven't broken yet.
We're talking about a lot of money here, right?
I mean, riches beyond belief?
So the legend goes.
Right. Gold and silver and rubies and diamonds--
Lions and tigers and bears. Oh my!
Well, that explains why he's got you here like Papillon.
But it doesn't tell us anything...
about what he's doing up river...
with those supplies he's shipping on Bobbi Cardina's barge.
Maybe he's searching for the lost city.
- Hoping to find it if Brian doesn't tell him. - No!
I looked at that stuff on the barge...
while we was coming up river...
and it was construction material.
And them guys ain't gonna build no church.
I swear I did not request these script changes.
Whatever happened to the original ending?
Those happily-forever-after endings that have become my trademark?
Your trademark is stupidity.
Hey, you.
Yeah, you.
Your friend over there looks a little sick.
I think it's because he's been looking at your pig face for too long.
Hey, Colonel, come on, don't get on the jazz.
You're just gonna get yourself in trouble.
You talk big from in there.
Well, maybe you should let me out.
- No, Doyle said, no. - Yeah, Doyle said no.
Doyle said, no for this pendejo.
Perhaps he would like to see his friend scream.
Oh, why is it always me?
You haven't got the guts.
Hey, Hannibal, what are you trying to do here?
No. No, Doyle will skin you.
See, Face, you got off easy.
Yeah, you think?
You yellow-bellied sack of pus.
Oh, no. Look, wait, wait, can we talk about this?
You've got him against the ropes, champ. Now take him out!
Hit him anywhere but the face.
Face, you've got a mad extra here.
He didn't get his lunch money.
Get me that kid with the gold around his neck. He's fantastic!
Who's his agent?
I'm impressed, Face.
I thought he was going to cream you.
Yeah, but you know...
Looks like you could use a hand, muchacho.
I was going to cut you loose.
Right.
Now, let the others out.
You're a Princess.
Face, all that I can say is it's a good thing...
we weren't rolling film.
I mean, I know that it was, you know...
just the rehearsal, but still, I need more.
More? More!
Don't hold back.
I know that what you were doing was real...
but in film what we need is that which looks real.
Well, I'm fed up with all this movie business business, you know?
Audiences today are so sophisticated...
they're never going to go for that ballet...
that you put on for them.
That's real! Oh, it's fantastic.
It's so real.
I've had it.
You're right. This guy's a real trip.
He sure is.
Quickly, before Doyle returns. My barge is through here.
Just a minute. What are you doing here?
To help you escape. So Doyle would not kill you all.
Well, why the sudden concern for our safety?
You just wished to help your friend. You did nothing wrong.
- I see no reason you should die. - Thanks.
Now, what's up with Doyle?
What's so important to him he'd kill innocent travelers...
who try to go up river?
Let us waste no more time.
We can be back past the bend in the river before Doyle even knows of your escape.
Terrific.
Then we run into that other great sleazeball, El Cajon.
El Cajon will not bother us.
What's your connection to El Cajon?
How do you know he won't bother us?
He won't.
Vámonos.
Let's go.
Oh, no.
We no go with you. Not for us.
What're you talking about?
You'll never make it all the way back to Monte Alegre on foot.
And you can't wait here for Doyle.
He see shadow of doom cloud the future.
You must be some kind of hard-shelled nut.
What if I protected you like I did last time?
We got caught, señor.
But you didn't die.
You said nobody goes up against El Cajon...
and gets away.
You did. My magic works.
And I can do it again.
The moment to take.
Okay.
What're you doing?
Don't ask.
Fantastic.
Okay, we go.
Don't even think it, sucker.
Where is it? Where is it?
Where is it? Where? Where?
- Murdock, here it is. - No, no, no!
Here it is.
All right, I'm ready. You can bring them all on.
Cigar, Colonel?
- Thanks, Face. - Sure.
Okay...
where are the firing pins, lady?
I gave them to Doyle. You will not need them. You will be safe with me.
I will get you back to Monte Alegre.
We're not going back to Monte Alegre. Not yet.
We're too close.
We could be within throwing distance of that lost city.
We're not turning back now.
Brian, you need a doctor.
I need to find that place.
We may never get another chance like this.
I will not guide you up river.
Then we'll just have to borrow your barge...
firing pins or no firing pins.
Hey, man, what do we care about a lost city?
Why do we care? Why do we care? Because it is just possible...
that it will be the greatest location...
for the finale of my monumental epic.
We talking a finale to your life, sucker.
Not having no firing pins when we're attacked by river pirates...
Doyle, and the rest of them Amazonian Indians.
Well, then maybe we should get out of here.
You understand, don't you, Hannibal?
This is something I have to do.
I've always been one for a nice relaxing cruise.
And that'd be a good time, querida...
for you to tell me what Doyle's up to round that bend in the river.
Look, all I do is run supplies.
I drop them on shore and then I leave.
When I return, they're gone.
Who takes them and what they are for I do not know.
Then we'll all find out together.
I hate this movie.
But I do like the leading lady.
You've got her.
If only I can get her agent down to $50,000.
There are the Devil's Horns!
I knew it! I knew it was here!
Natives with spears.
How I wish I had a shoreline of natives with spears.
The texture, the color. I need that, I need that fast film.
Your color going to be red with blood if you don't stop acting stupid.
Listen, I am I, and you are you.
Perchance some day that we should walk along the same road together...
- You be dead! - Gotcha.
All right, this is your party.
Where do we go from here?
We walk.
It had been six months...
since we had seen...
the 26-toed crater banth and his son...
that had become affectionately known...
as Throgmorton the Terrible to our crew.
Tchapate.
Come back, Little John, come back!
Tchapate.
Nice to meet you.
Friend of yours?
It's the guardian of the tribe of Del Rio.
Supposedly his powers...
protected Del Rio and its riches.
That's right.
I know.
Where's the rest of it?
There has to be more, right? If this guy's watching over the lost city...
then he doesn't have a very big job.
Legend goes that Tchapate stands guard over Del Rio.
And only to the one who can unseat him...
will he tell the secrets of the lost city.
The key is in what Brian said.
He said...
the one man who can unseat Tchapate...
from his rule.
You see, dwellers at that time in Del Rio were primitives.
They ruled by strength.
They did choose their kings according to who was strongest.
Okay, B.A., give it a shot.
All right, B.A.
It was all worth it. It really does exist.
You know, kid, you did all right.
I like the way that guy's hooked up.
Me, too.
So they found it. I knew they would.
I knew they would lead us to it...
if we made their escape convincing enough.
And me self and husband of me sister, we go free?
The hell you are.
You got to take us back there.
Back? Is no possible.
You can't remember where it was?
Our deal was to go with them when they escape...
to come and tell you. That was our deal.
No. Our deal is what I say it is.
And unless your sister wants to lose a husband and a brother in one afternoon...
you take us back to the lost city.
Si, Señor Doyle.
I do not think me sister could stand so much grief all at once.
Of course she couldn't. Now get ready to move out.
So the lost city's there.
It's really there.
And all its treasures are mine.
Si, señor.
And all its evils, too.
♪ I told the witch doctor I was in love with you ♪
♪ I told the witch doctor you did not love me too ♪
♪ And then the witch doctor he told me what to do ♪
♪ He said, ooh-eh ooh-ah-ah, ting-ta ♪
♪ Walla-walla, bing-bang ♪
♪ Ooh-eh-ooh-ah-ah, ting-tang-walla-walla bing-bang ♪
What are you crazy, fool?
Walla-walla-bing-bang.
I could have hurt you before I realized who was behind this crazy thing.
You're supposed to be on guard duty.
Now, take over while I go check out the perimeter.
And keep your mind on your job...
or I'll walla-walla-bing-bang you.
Well, it's not exactly what I was hoping for.
It's beyond anything I'd hoped for.
I mean, people have such misconceptions.
Archeological digs that produce enough...
intact pieces to count on one hand are so few.
Here, look what we've got and so well preserved.
Yeah.
A few well preserved diamonds and golden statuettes.
It'd be so boring anyway.
Let's hit it.
What's up?
I've been checking this place over.
I found some of the original perimeter defenses...
we can kick into gear with a little effort.
- Against who? - Doyle.
I expect him here any minute.
Why do you think he let us escape?
- Let us? - Sure.
Face, you don't think I'd let you get in there with that cement mixer...
if I didn't figure the fight was rigged, do you?
I mean, Doyle figured he couldn't beat it out of Brian...
so he decided to follow him here.
Yes, but who would have...
No, I think Bobbi wanted to take us to Monte Alegre and get us out of here.
All right, let's hit it!
Drop your weapons, Doyle...
or we'll drop you.
Give it up, Smith.
I know your weapons are useless.
Come out where I can see you.
Come on out and...
maybe I'll spare the women.
You're messing with some pretty bad magic, Jack!
So, how's tricks?
You don't realize who you're dealing with.
I realize I'm dealing with a 200 pound sack of manure...
who's going to have a hard time crawling out of that hole.
- You're not going to leave us here. - I might spare the women.
But first, you're going to give us back the firing pins to our weapons, and then...
you're going to take us for a little walk and show us what you've been...
building up around that bend in the river.
A nuclear reactor.
They're building a nuclear reactor.
You know, from here that looks like Carlos Roiderman.
The South American industrialist?
Even my dad has business dealings with him.
What would Roiderman be doing building a nuclear reactor...
in the middle of the Amazon jungle?
Did you see that? Did you see what he did?
Nazis, Hannibal! They're Nazis!
They are the new Reich.
Strong, able and undefeatable.
What do you intend to do now, Smith?
Take them all on? Just the four of you...
two women, and a lame?
What will become of The A-Team in its...
desperate attempt to stave off worldwide disaster?
Will good triumph over evil?
Will Rocky Racoon be reunited with Little Nell?
These and other questions will be answered in the next exciting chapter of...
"The Führer The Better."
I can't believe Carlos Roiderman's a Nazi.
You know, my dad always suspected him...
Roiderman's background being so obscure.
But who would've guessed he built his empires with monies he must have...
spirited away when he escaped Germany at the end of the War.
We got to stop them, Hannibal.
We'd never stand a chance of defeating them.
You'll die trying, my dear.
If that's what it takes.
Well, what's your plan, Colonel?
We've got to destroy that reactor.
Ah! How?
Well, now Face, it'd be nice if we had some help.
But we have surprise, and a touch of lunacy on our side.
That be true.
How many men do you need?
I counted about 20 of them. They're well armed.
With us, six more would make it interesting.
Wait. I can get you these men.
You can?
I can't. My father can.
- Wait, your father? - Yeah.
Who's your...
He's not!
Think about it, Coffin.
Now, put that hand up in the air.
Both of them.
Now, slowly...
put your leg on the ground.
Señor...
you are the man with many lives.
Like the cat, no?
I'm the one with the gun with many bullets.
You intrigue me, señor.
How come you passed...
our perimeter guard and alarms?
- Your daughter showed us. - No!
- I had to, Papa. - If they hurt you.
No! No!
They captured Doyle.
You are something, señor. You are!
We must work with them.
We must help them stop what is happening up river.
I see you got your boat in the water.
- We could use it. - Of course, señor.
But of course. Anything you say.
Now you can trust me, no?
You don't realty trust this pile of pig slop, do you, Hannibal?
If we've got any chance of...
destroying that Nazi generator we don't have much choice.
And...
if you talk that way about him...
you may not live to date his daughter.
Explain that to me.
Tell me how something like that...
could have produced something like this.
The world is full of wonders.
My men are ready, Señor Smith.
But what you tell us...
better be true.
I wouldn't be here if it wasn't.
To think all this time I was helping these Nazi pigs.
Yeah, it's not nearly the same as sinking people's boats...
and robbing them for money and fun, is it?
All right, let's do it!
I'll see you on the flip side.
Hannibal, you can't leave us behind.
Not at this point.
Somehow I feel I owe Señor Roiderman.
You've done enough.
Your leg would hold us back.
Besides, in case we don't come back...
somebody's got to tell the world what happened.
Colonel Smith...
do not try to leave me behind.
I wouldn't think of it, sweetheart. Climb aboard.
And you come, too, mi amigo.
You will get the thriller, no?
- Still no word from Doyle? - No, sir.
We will keep working until the supplies are exhausted.
By then the girl should have arrived with the rest of the load.
Why she did not have it all the first time is my question...
and one I hope Doyle is prepared to answer.
Cease fire!
You didn't get a building permit...
from our executive offices, pal.
We're going to have to close you down.
Who in hell are you?
The A-Team!
Come on, let's go!
Got to get this chopper.
Pick you up later, Roiderman.
- It was a battle, no? - Yeah.
They mess with the wrong people, eh?
Your dad and I are going to get along great.
If we ever get out of this jungle.
What you mean, muchacho? We take my...
My boat!
I love it when a plan comes together.
Okay, we're all set.
B.A. and Face, you'll be the ushers.
- Murdock, you'll be taking the-- - The movies, yes--
This will be my first wedding ceremony...
as the captain of the Desayuno Domingo...
that I shall perform...
with great sincerity...
and for a slight fee, the ceremony.
I'll pay you $100.
Like we agreed.
Señor, for a man...
who has discovered a lost city...
for a man who worth a king's ransom...
I would strongly suggest...
that these arrangements be reconsidered.
Which brings up the consideration of our fee.
We normally take 10% of any recovered items.
In this case, that's 10% of the lost city.
With all its gold, and jewels...
and archeological treasures.
We'll pass on the Indian skulls...
bone rattles, you know, stuff like that.
I think that's fair enough.
And perhaps as a gift to the captain...
who shall perform...
this glorious wedding ceremony...
five additional percents?
Three.
Done.
The wedding ceremony shall proceed!
The funeral is cancelled.
Oh, her mother and I do.
Brian Lefcourt...
I do.
Tawnia Baker...
I do.
This good-looking one...
he has a part of the ten percents, Cardina.
I am thinking maybe...
we could have this man in the family, no?
I will do my best.
Thanks, Hannibal.
I'll never forget you guys.
Felicitations, kid.
It was good having you around. Congratulations.
Thank you.
Tawnia and I'll write you and let you know how the excavations are going.
How long before we see any of the money?
Well, you know how these things are.
Could be five, six years maybe.
Just to find where it's hidden.
These things are very complicated.
The ancients were very devious.
Five, six years?
- Hey, maybe seven. - Hey.
Now, we will dance and make noise.
Sorry man, but I don't dance.
That was muy bueno. Bueno, Señor Coffin!
It was a mucho monumental wedding ceremony.
I just can't wait till we stop rehearsing...
and start shooting this--
Are you crazy, fool?
I'll give you all my lunch money...
and a free screen pass, leave me alone!
Cut!