Hello?
$100,000 is a great deal of money, Mr. Anderson.
I trust you are not avoiding me?
Hey, look, Sarnoff,
I don't want you calling me here.
Let's meet somewhere where we can talk.
The time for talking is past, Mr. Anderson.
My government has paid you well,
and we now expect the documents.
You'll get them, don't worry.
After all, this is
classified defense secrets I'm giving you.
It takes a while to put something like this together.
When?
Today.
This afternoon.
Then I will be back in Moscow tomorrow.
Excellent.
- Hey, something's up. - Huh?
Kind of early in the morning
for Anderson's kid to be out, isn't it?
School doesn't start for a couple of hours.
And what's that she's got with her?
Looks like a briefcase.
Check it out.
Paula! Paula!
Gentlemen, I have a very important assignment for you.
Her name is Paula Anderson.
No, sorry, General. She's a little young, you know.
Have her give me a call in five or six years.
Paula Anderson ran away from home this morning
and her father's very concerned.
You gentlemen are going to find her.
Well, since when did we go into the stray kid business?
Well, since the so-called stray kid
became a national security risk.
And what'd she do, smuggle some Clearasil out of the country?
What she did do is take her father's briefcase
which contains classified data
on the Strategic Defense Initiative.
Otherwise known as Star Wars.
Yes, we know what it is, General.
We don't know why you need us.
Yeah. Why don't you just call in the Feds?
If news of this gets out,
Paula's safety could be endangered,
and that's an unpleasantness I want to avoid.
The address is on the back of the photograph.
Her father's expecting you.
And one other thing.
If that briefcase should fall into the wrong hands,
consequences could be quite severe.
Like, messing up our National Defense Program, right?
That and any hope for your pardon, Mr. Santana.
Let's see. I know he's back here someplace.
Honey, you got company.
Hi, guys! Nice of you to stop by.
I see you already met Erica, huh?
Yeah, she let us in.
Very sweet of you, honey.
My pleasure.
So, Murdock, this is the Puppy Platter, huh?
How intriguing.
It is, isn't it? And you know what?
In a very short period of time,
there are gonna be Puppy Platters
in every neighborhood across this country.
And you know what? I'm gonna be right in on the ground floor.
Hey, man, what you doing crawling around on the floor?
I thought you were going to be a manager trainee.
B.A., a restaurant is in a perpetual battle
to maintain its own personal hygiene.
I mean, do you realize that there is a veritable metropolis
of unwholesome creatures living under here?
It doesn't matter anyway.
I'm working my way up to deep fryer.
We're all so proud of him.
Well, I hate to drag you away
but your uncle needs you on a family matter.
My uncle?
- Your uncle Stockwell. - You remember?
- Oh. - Nice to meet you.
Honey, I'm afraid I'm gonna have to go.
I understand.
Maybe we can share a milkshake after work tomorrow.
Chocolate.
With whipped cream on top.
Mr. Green, it's me, Paula Anderson.
Paula, what on earth are you...
Well, come in, come in, come in.
Mrs. Greyhosky, good morning.
I love your hair.
There. Feeling any warmth in those toes yet?
- A little. - Good.
Now when your tongue gets thawed out all the way, let me know,
'cause then maybe you'll tell me what you're doing here
instead of being in school.
Well, school's closed for today,
for teacher's meetings,
and I just wanted to come see you.
It's been a long time.
That it has.
But the next time I ran away from home, if I were you,
I'd wear something more substantial than those sneakers.
I didn't run away from home.
But your heart is racing like a rabbit.
I can practically feel it all the way over here.
I didn't want you worrying about me.
But I ran into these guys
on motorcycles,
and they started chasing me.
And I got away as fast as I could,
but it was really frightening,
and I'm okay now.
You know, Paula, you always were a lousy liar.
Like when we met at the hospital that first time, remember?
You asked if I wanted anything and I said,
"Only if it's chocolate mousse."
I knew darn well that the kitchen served something
beside that miserable plain gelatin,
but you said they didn't.
You were lying then, kiddo, and you're lying now.
There wasn't any motorcycle gang.
And you weren't coming to visit me, either.
But I really was chased by somebody.
I didn't make that part up.
When I left the house this morning,
this car was chasing me for hours.
I was so scared.
You honestly were outside for hours alone?
Oh, Paula, what kind of fool stunt was that?
Forget I said that.
Friends as good as we aren't supposed to beat each other up.
Being alone in a neighborhood like this
could scare the pants off anybody, especially a youngster.
I didn't imagine it. They were after me.
And I know why, too.
Why?
It's because of my father.
This morning I heard him on the phone
making a deal with this man
to sell him some important government papers.
My father is
a traitor.
All right, easy does it.
Easy does it. Watch that piano.
It's an awfully nice piece of furniture there, Frankie.
Yeah, an awfully nice hernia I'm getting.
Oh, man, stop jibber jabbering and start lifting.
Lifting, lifting.
Murdock, could you give us a hand here? I mean...
No can do. I'm a scab.
The union prohibits me from working.
Yes?
What are you men doing? I didn't order a piano.
- You've got the wrong address. - Mr. Anderson,
we have the right address.
Stockwell Movers.
Now,
where would you like us to put it?
I'm so glad you're here.
- Nothing like a satisfied customer. - Oh...
Just in case somebody's listening in.
You haven't heard from Paula?
No, nothing.
I stayed by the phone all day.
Now why hasn't she called?
What if something's happened to her?
We'll need a list of all of her friends and relatives in this area.
Do you have any idea why Paula would leave home like this?
The only thing I can think of
is that she must have overheard me talking to Sarnoff.
I was so stupid to talk to him here.
Who's Sarnoff?
General Stockwell didn't tell you about him?
Sarnoff is the top Soviet operative in this country.
We've been working for months to lure him into the open.
I'm meeting him today supposedly to sell him military secrets.
So when Paula overheard your conversation,
she believed that you betrayed your country?
She must be terrified out of her mind.
Please. You've got to find her before they do.
Nobody knows these documents are forgeries.
There's nothing the opposition wouldn't do to get them.
Well, that's really a long shot, isn't it?
A picture of Paula and some old gent?
It's not much to go on.
Yeah, we'll split up on this one.
Sergeant, you and Frank try and find her.
Okay, we'll check out the hospital right away.
That is a wise and creative disbursement
of available manpower, Colonel.
Thanks, Murdock.
Speaking of manpower,
what are you and I gonna do, Colonel?
Well, Face, we got the easy part.
Murdock, I got something special for you.
Yeah, I'm positive.
Well, she almost lost us, but it's her.
Hold on.
It's apartment 8-A.
Bernie Green.
What do you want us to do?
Right.
We get the briefcase.
Mr. Green, they're here! They're crossing the street!
- Who? - The men who're after me!
That's the car from this morning. I'm sure of it.
They know I'm here.
What they don't know is they're now dealing with Bernie Green,
a pretty tough piece of beef jerky.
May I help you?
Hi. I understand you have a vacancy.
Could you speak louder, please?
I'm a little hard of hearing.
I said, I'm looking for an apartment.
Mr. Green, the briefcase.
Don't worry. I've taken care of it.
Fire escape!
Give me a hand, B.A. There's two of them.
You're in deep trouble, pal.
That's funny, I thought we were the ones holding the guns on you.
My ID's in my back pocket. We're FBI.
Obstruction of federal agents in the line of duty.
We're talking federal terms for you guys.
Looks legit, man.
Looks like we really blew it this time, amigo.
No dice, Stockwell.
We're not going up against the FBI head to head.
We're on the same side, remember?
Very well. The FBI agents that Baracus and Santana encountered
know nothing of our intended deception with the Russians.
The Bureau has the information
that Sarnoff is going to purchase Star Wars information.
Hence, it was necessary to stakeout the government personnel
who had access to that information.
Yeah, including Randy Anderson's home and family.
You show a real flare for this line of work, Colonel.
Everything else is as you've come to understand it.
Why didn't you tell us that Paula's disappearance
was connected to your sting operation?
Well, because there was always the possibility that you might find her
before needing to know that.
"Need to know" is standard operating procedure.
I'm getting really tired of you, Stockwell.
And your procedures.
We'll get Randy Anderson's daughter back
because he's a decent man.
But not for you, General.
Not anymore.
Are you really sure about this?
Well, of course, I'm sure.
George Nemcek is the best friend I've got.
And there was a time when the old cuss
had a pretty good head on his shoulders, too.
He might just have some ideas
about how to get you out of this mess.
Now, are we partners in this or not?
Of course we are.
Come on, you're gonna love this guy.
Just saw three nurses in tears, Nemcek.
Figured they must've come from seeing you.
What do you want, Bernie?
Get my 40 bucks back.
What are you talking about? I paid you back 20 years ago.
You must be getting senile, George. You never paid me.
The hell I didn't.
Who's this?
This is Paula Anderson.
Paula was very good to me back there
when I was having gall bladder surgery.
Oh, lucky you.
All they do around this place is wake you up
and poke you with things.
Mr. Green, maybe we better leave.
A smart kid.
Now, listen, George, Paula here is in a pile of trouble.
Her father's mixed up in some kind of government mess,
and there's a bunch of guys chasing her around with guns.
What do you mean, guns?
I mean, guns.
The kind that put holes in people.
They knocked down my door, shot at us.
We snuck off down the fire escape.
But she's only a child.
Yes, but she's also my friend,
and that makes her your friend.
And we need a place to hide out
until we can come up with some kind of plan.
You want to stay here?
You can stay as long as you want.
The staff won't mind?
Are you kidding?
Those people are so afraid of me
they talk to me as little as possible.
Can't say I blame them.
So what'd she say, man?
This is Bernie Green's senior citizen pass, all right.
He was here with a young girl.
They sat through two Chuck Norris movies
and then they left about an hour ago.
Now what? We got a cold trail.
Not quite, my friend.
After a dose of that legendary Santana charm,
the ticket girl was persuaded to tell me
about this old guy he used to meet here every day.
George Nemcek.
He lives at a nursing home on Silver Creek Drive.
Maybe there's something really ill to that Santana's charm.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It's awesome.
Okay, he's approaching the boat rides now.
Yeah, yeah, I got him.
And there's Sarnoff.
You know, he doesn't look like such a tough guy.
I wonder if his family would like some wallet-sized shots?
Just keep him in focus, Lieutenant.
These are the first shots of Sarnoff anybody ever got.
There's been a problem. I don't have them.
I couldn't get them.
That is very tragic news.
You got to believe me.
They put new security restrictions on us.
Getting access to everything you need is almost impossible now.
Possibly.
And possibly you're just stalling.
Why do I get the impression
that you never intended to give me the information?
For God's sake, Sarnoff.
Hannibal, he's got a gun.
Naughty, naughty.
What good would stalling do me?
I already accepted your money.
You know who I am, where I live.
Please!
What's happening? Can you make the shot?
I can now.
So far, so good. Sarnoff bought the story.
Now, it's up to Murdock.
Forgive me if I appear a little nervous.
I'm more familiar with a laboratory
than I am with a television studio.
I understand.
Professor, why have you chosen to come forward
with these accusations?
Because...
I don't think that I can live with myself any longer,
with my conscience.
I would like to make this clear.
These are not accusations which I'm talking about here.
These are truths.
And dramatic ones at that.
What you are saying is that our government is lying
about Star Wars technology.
Well, as a member of SDI research,
I think I can speak with some authority here
that these lies,
that's what they are, lies,
are an elaborate hoax to deceive the American people.
Because, not only is Star Wars possible,
but long ago we perfected it.
Why all the secrecy, then?
If what you say is true, if you can prove that Star Wars exists,
why mask your identity?
This is a scandal of unprecedented proportions
and there are individuals who stand to reap untold fortunes,
billions of your tax dollars from SDI research.
And I don't think that they would hesitate
for one moment to silence me.
Do you understand now?
Your television interview was most interesting, Professor.
Do I know you?
No. But you will.
Well, if I am going to be abducted at gunpoint by you,
why don't you tell me where we're going?
We are going to a laboratory
where you will demonstrate for me the Star Wars technology.
Well, that's preposterous. You couldn't possibly comprehend it.
I have a doctorate in advanced laser physics, Professor.
I'm quite suited to comprehend it.
Shall we go?
Well, I'll have to give the KGB credit.
Their agents are getting much better looking.
Yeah, she's not bad.
Let's go.
Not bad if you like the Bee Gees.
But I'll take Twisted Sister any day.
And you accuse me of getting senile?
He's just angry because the Doobie Brothers broke up.
Who? Who?
Would either of you mind if I asked a question?
Ask two. We have a clearance sale all week.
Well,
on the news lately, they've been having these stories
about how some kids have been turning in their parents to the police
for using drugs and stuff, you know?
And you want to know if we think you should do that?
Is that what you want to do, turn in your old man?
Of course, I don't want to.
But maybe it's the right thing.
All right, George. You're the mouth.
Let's hear the wisdom of your years.
Okay, everybody. Take five.
Paula, your problem is that you're...
Is that you're letting your head do your talking.
Now if I were you, I'd let my heart work with my mind.
They tell me what to do when they're ready.
I think what my heart wants to do is call my father.
So, that wasn't so tough, now, was it?
Hello?
Daddy? It's me.
Paula! Where are you? Are you all right?
I've been going crazy.
I'm all right. I'm with friends.
Listen, about what you heard me saying on the phone.
It isn't what you think.
You said you were going to sell that man secrets.
Look, I know what I said.
It's a long story.
But you have to trust me, honey.
Everything is going to be okay.
I'm sorry I took your briefcase.
I know.
Look, tell me where you are.
I'll come and get you. We'll have a nice long talk.
I'll explain everything.
You really can't be serious.
Science is not a pursuit which responds well
to the ominous threat of arms-bearing thugs.
SDI, Professor Murdock.
We want to know everything about it.
One way or another.
Although we hearken
from differing political worlds, Doctor,
I feel it's safe to assume
we can be considered colleagues.
Therefore I ask you,
is this an environment in which you would want to work?
You make a valid point.
And if I must betray my country,
must I also do it in front of spectators?
Is there anything else, Professor?
Yes. That perfume you're wearing,
what's it called?
Does it bother you?
No. Quite the contrary.
It excites me.
I mean, while I am a man of science,
if you...
If you remove the science,
I mean, what have you?
A man.
Let us get back to the business at hand,
shall we, Professor?
Which directional imaging system are you utilizing,
reflective optics
or particle density?
You are the first woman that I have ever seen
who looks good in fluorescent light.
Can you believe this guy?
I mean, what the heck is he doing in there?
I don't know, Face.
Maybe you ought to practice some of these lines.
They seem to be working.
Oh, please.
Hannibal, any novice could stall her
until B.A. and Frankie find the girl.
You know, if he's not careful, he's gonna blow this whole thing.
Now, don't get defensive, Face.
Defensive? I'm not being defensive.
I'm sure you could make up much better lines.
Thanks for your confidence.
Now, he may know something
that you don't know.
That perfume you're wearing, what is it called?
2534 Silver Creek Drive. Perfecto.
Let's go see if this guy Nemcek
heard from the Anderson girl.
Hello. Nice to see you.
Hi.
Excuse me, can you direct us to Mr. Nemcek's room?
Mr. Nemcek?
Hi.
We're friends of a friend of his, Bernie Green.
Do you know him?
Hello.
B.A. what's wrong with these people?
Must be the Santana charm.
You two got business here?
Excuse me, ma'am.
We're either looking for George Nemcek or Bernie Green.
Never heard of them.
Let me give the old Santana charm
one more try.
Perhaps you're mistaken, ma'am.
But it's our understanding that George Nemcek lives here.
What's the matter with you? You dense or something?
I just told you I never heard of them.
Now, listen, I'll tell you what you do.
You and the hair cut over there
take a hike.
So much for the Santana charm.
Miss Vosburgh, I overheard you.
Is that any way to treat our guests?
George Nemcek is straight down the corridor,
last door to your right, gentlemen.
Thank you very much.
But he's not there. He left.
In a coma.
This hose is loaded with hot, scalding water.
Don't make me use it.
Trust me, we won't.
Hey, what you people doing?
We're the good guys. We're not here to hurt nobody.
I'd frisk them, Bernie.
So much for the old B.A. charm.
Oh, good guys, eh? What're you doing with this?
I can explain that.
Then explain what you want with a pair of old fossils
like Bernie Green and George Nemcek.
Well, actually, we're looking for a girl,
Paula Anderson.
Yeah, her father sent us.
My father?
Wait, I know you.
Mr. Green, these are the men that helped us from the gunmen.
See, I told you. We the good guys.
Oh, nuts.
Just when things were getting interesting around here.
Thank you.
Look, I'm sorry if we frightened anybody,
but Paula's dad is really worried about her.
Not anymore. I just called him.
Yes. He's on his way here to pick her up right now.
Looks like you boys are out of a job.
There's a Mr. Anderson in the lounge.
You want me to blow him off?
Well, thanks anyway, Iris. We'll see him.
Just look at that, will you?
To see a terrific little girl like Paula
reunited with her dad. - Yeah.
Makes you feel warm all over, doesn't it, George?
And all the time I thought it was Iris here turning me on.
You big, sexy lug, you.
It's really got me worried, Frankie.
Well, that's okay, B.A. I think they're old enough.
Not them, fool! Paula's dad.
I've been thinking, suppose somebody followed him here?
Well, then we're in deep guacamole.
Hurry. Get the Andersons out of here.
Sarnoff.
Well, Mr. Anderson. What a pleasant surprise.
Don't worry about a thing.
I know it's unexpected, but I like a challenge.
A challenge? How can you say that, Hannibal?
The Russians have got both Paula and her dad.
Right. But didn't Bernie Green tell you
that the briefcase is in his apartment?
That's where Paula will have to take them.
We'll be there as soon as we get Murdock.
I'll meet you there.
"As soon as we get Murdock."
And might I ask how we're going to do that?
Murdock is gonna get out for us.
The things that we could've explored together
had our political fates been different.
- Professor... - We could've learned from each other.
Not just about SDI,
but about other things.
Clearly you are not going to provide
the information we need.
Joined together in blissful détente.
My Apollo and your Soyuz.
I regret to inform you
that your services are no longer needed, Professor.
What about dinner? This evening?
I think not.
Unfortunately, your stubborn behavior
renders you useless to us.
And you will now be killed by my comrades outside.
Goodbye.
Doctor? Olga?
May I call you Olga?
We could have made such beautiful science together.
Romeo in there has just wrecked everything.
Now she's gonna go get the KGB death squad.
Yeah. Great, isn't it?
Get the lead out, Nemcek. We haven't got all day.
Oh, don't be a such a cranky old man, Bernie.
With my cross town shortcut,
we'll still beat them to your place.
Not on foot, we won't.
What? They shot the tires on my van!
Either of you fellows own a car?
No, neither of us drives anymore.
Damn it, old George, I've lost her.
Paula came to me for help, trusted me
and I've let her down.
Oh, Bernie, you're not gonna start whining on me again, now are you?
Those men who kidnapped Paula and her father
are Russian KGB agents!
And what are we, chopped liver?
Between the two of us, we've got more experience
than those Russians.
And before I check into Saint Peter's Hotel,
I want to use that experience.
Okay, now. Everybody off.
Come on, folks.
I'm not leaving this bus without authorization.
Don't leave without your Geritol commandos. Come on.
Climb on, everybody.
Here we go.
That's it. Watch your step.
Nice and easy.
Goodbye!
Hey, pops, you drive pretty good. I'm impressed.
You should be impressed.
George Nemcek was the best driver in the fleet
until he got fired.
Fired?
Old age.
Reckless driving.
We're gonna die.
Let's feel those G-forces, Nemcek.
Everybody hold on to your dentures.
Where's Don Juan, hmm?
I thought you said he was getting out.
They probably killed him by now.
Faith, Lieutenant. Faith.
Yeah.
See?
Holy...
How long do I have to wait, huh?
How long before I kill you?
Please. I've already told you everything.
Mr. Green said he hid the file someplace.
I don't know where.
You're lying.
Leave her alone, Sarnoff.
I'm telling you, the information I was going to sell you is no good.
It was a secret sting operation.
I will not return to Moscow empty-handed.
Oh, great. B.A., if this maniac doesn't kill us,
we're all going to jail.
And I bet we don't get to collect $200, either.
Everyone out. Now!
All right. Hold it right here. Hold it right here.
Everybody stop!
All right, everybody... Hold it right there.
All right, stop!
Hold it right there. I said stop!
Back up! Just hold it right here, folks.
Okay, this is as far as we go.
All right.
Everybody get back,
or the girl dies right here.
Now, put your weapons down!
Down! Put it down!
All right, we will have 10 minutes to make a getaway
or the hostages will never be seen again.
Which of you is Mr. Green?
I'm Bernie Green.
Mr. Green, no!
Let the others go. I'm the one you want, anyway.
I've got the file.
You come to me, old man.
Let them go first.
Don't test me! I will kill her!
All right, move!
Move back!
Look out! Watch it!
Come on!
It looks like a hostage situation to me, Colonel.
Doesn't look good. It's up to you, Face.
Me? Why me?
You're driving.
Open the door! Go on, open the door!
I did it! My God, I did it!
That's a highly effective distraction, Faceman.
Oh, thanks, Murdock.
Nice, Face.
I still can't believe it.
We actually captured a KGB spy.
My dad says things worked out better than the government ever dreamed.
Tell me about it.
You know, Stockwell says we might even get our pardon
sooner than we thought.
Must be the old A-Team charm.
You know it.
You never saw a staff happier to get rid of anybody
than they were of George here.
They were not happy.
I stand corrected. They were ecstatic.
Where are you two... Where are you two going, anyway?
With you.
Sure. You know, fight bad guys.
That thing with the KGB really got my adrenaline pumping.
He didn't even know he had any adrenaline left.
Yeah, well, that's really good to hear,
but you guys can't really fight bad guys with us.
You see, the truth is we might not even be
in the bad guy fighting business much longer.
What do you expect us to do now?
Just sit around and watch the liver spots form on our hands?
No chance, my friends.
Did you read the paper about the teenage thugs that are out
terrorizing the city parks?
Whoa, whoa! Slow down.
Slow down.
I mean, it was really great working with you guys, but...
But what? You just said it was great working with us.
Yeah, that's what you said, Frank.
Come on, George, let's show this kid how it's done.
Hannibal? Face? Murdock?
- See you, Frank. - B.A.?
Come on with us, kid.
We're gonna teach you everything you're gonna need.
Yeah, yeah. Paula, somebody, come on.
These maniacs are gonna get me killed.
Chasing thugs through the park.
It's got a nice ring to it, doesn't it?
It has a terrible ring to it.
Just think, if we get a pardon
we may never have to eat a knuckle sandwich again.
I wouldn't bet on it, crazy man.
Looks like Hannibal's on the jazz again.
What? What? No, you tell me right now.
You tell me right to my face,
you tell me that you don't have a plan.
Well, I was thinking, like Bernie and George,
what are we gonna do when this thing's over?
I mean,
what are we really qualified to do?
Go after thugs in the park.
And outlaw motorcycle gangs,
organized crime figures.
Why, there's a world of slime balls out there.
I knew it.
I just knew you had a plan.
Comforting, isn't it?
I'll get the van.