1
00:01:31,150 --> 00:01:32,150
Excuse me.

2
00:01:32,248 --> 00:01:35,811
Wendy Beamish and William Hicks.
They were in a car accident.

3
00:01:36,072 --> 00:01:37,447
See the officer about that.

4
00:01:37,949 --> 00:01:39,147
Good evening.

5
00:01:39,408 --> 00:01:42,196
Alec Newberry.
Congressman Langston's office.

6
00:01:42,411 --> 00:01:44,949
If I can be of any assistance...

7
00:01:45,331 --> 00:01:47,703
- Congressman who?
- Langston.

8
00:01:47,959 --> 00:01:49,287
Clear, please.

9
00:01:49,502 --> 00:01:50,581
Are they dead?

10
00:01:50,837 --> 00:01:52,663
- Hi, you guys.
- Wendy.

11
00:01:54,173 --> 00:01:56,047
- Wendy. You okay?
- I'm fine.

12
00:01:56,300 --> 00:01:57,676
I'm fine.

13
00:01:57,885 --> 00:02:01,634
The car my dad got me
for graduation is totaled.

14
00:02:03,599 --> 00:02:06,553
Go find Billy.
See if you can sober him up.

15
00:02:06,769 --> 00:02:09,604
He almost kills you,
and you're paying?

16
00:02:09,814 --> 00:02:13,147
Jules, please.
Is that your date?

17
00:02:13,401 --> 00:02:14,401
No.

18
00:02:15,278 --> 00:02:16,653
That is.

19
00:02:17,989 --> 00:02:20,859
We're dealing with
a first-time offender here.

20
00:02:21,117 --> 00:02:24,617
Miss Beamish won't press charges,
so why not let it slide?

21
00:02:24,830 --> 00:02:26,869
Forget it, counselor.

22
00:02:28,167 --> 00:02:30,622
I wouldn't strike a match
near his blood.

23
00:02:35,716 --> 00:02:37,708
Okay, you're under arrest.

24
00:02:37,926 --> 00:02:39,207
Watch the sax.

25
00:02:39,470 --> 00:02:41,676
Do you believe in premarital sax?

26
00:02:42,389 --> 00:02:45,675
May I assume the accident
left you injury-free?

27
00:02:45,893 --> 00:02:48,099
Billy, four months after graduation...

28
00:02:48,312 --> 00:02:51,478
...and you still act like
every night's a frat party.

29
00:02:52,608 --> 00:02:55,443
Aren't you even a little
concerned about Wendy?

30
00:02:57,196 --> 00:02:58,524
- How bad is it?
- Severe.

31
00:02:58,739 --> 00:03:02,108
She might have exceeded
the limit on her father's VISA.

32
00:03:03,410 --> 00:03:05,486
You're being arrested
for drunk driving.

33
00:03:05,746 --> 00:03:09,874
Drunk, definitely. I don't know
if you can call it driving.

34
00:03:12,545 --> 00:03:15,250
- Are you okay?
- I'm fine.

35
00:03:15,465 --> 00:03:17,374
I'm sorry, Wendy.

36
00:03:17,592 --> 00:03:19,419
We'll be right behind you.

37
00:03:20,762 --> 00:03:23,383
Alec, I've got a lot of cash.

38
00:03:32,440 --> 00:03:33,440
Dale?

39
00:03:34,234 --> 00:03:35,692
Dale Biberman.

40
00:03:36,820 --> 00:03:39,192
- Do you remember me?
- Yes, but I'm...

41
00:03:39,405 --> 00:03:40,604
Kirby Keager.

42
00:03:41,658 --> 00:03:44,196
You were a senior
when I started Georgetown.

43
00:03:44,494 --> 00:03:46,783
Right. Kirby. How are you?

44
00:03:46,996 --> 00:03:48,039
I graduated.

45
00:03:48,289 --> 00:03:50,116
I always knew you would.

46
00:03:50,375 --> 00:03:51,952
And I'm a lawyer.

47
00:03:54,295 --> 00:03:56,169
I mean, I'm a waiter...

48
00:03:56,381 --> 00:03:58,420
...studying to become a lawyer.

49
00:03:59,342 --> 00:04:01,383
Dale Biberman.
I can't believe it.

50
00:04:01,637 --> 00:04:03,048
Still like Woody Allen?

51
00:04:03,264 --> 00:04:04,972
I've gotta go.
Nice seeing you.

52
00:04:09,311 --> 00:04:12,597
Don't you worry.
Everything's gonna be all right.

53
00:04:51,813 --> 00:04:54,731
- Hey, thanks for bailing me out.
- Again.

54
00:04:55,108 --> 00:04:56,982
When are you gonna get a car...

55
00:04:57,194 --> 00:05:00,313
...that expresses your lifestyle
as the perfect couple?

56
00:05:00,530 --> 00:05:05,109
Not everyone got recruited out of
school into international banking.

57
00:05:05,327 --> 00:05:09,989
My parents gave me the car. I bet
I was conceived in the back seat.

58
00:05:10,248 --> 00:05:11,446
It's still sticky.

59
00:05:11,708 --> 00:05:14,495
Wait till my father hears
the car is totaled.

60
00:05:17,214 --> 00:05:19,586
Wally, undergrads
sitting at our table?

61
00:05:19,841 --> 00:05:24,302
- Only been there for 10 minutes.
- We've been here four years!

62
00:05:24,513 --> 00:05:27,086
Kirbo, come here.
Where have you been?

63
00:05:27,307 --> 00:05:29,181
It's busy. Where'd you go?

64
00:05:29,434 --> 00:05:30,632
- The hospital.
- What?

65
00:05:30,852 --> 00:05:32,311
- The hospital.
- You sick?

66
00:05:32,562 --> 00:05:35,349
- It was an emergency.
- You could have told me.

67
00:05:35,565 --> 00:05:37,854
- Gonna fire me?
- I fired you last week.

68
00:05:38,193 --> 00:05:39,817
Blinding white light.

69
00:05:40,028 --> 00:05:41,028
Skid.

70
00:05:41,489 --> 00:05:42,489
Tree.

71
00:05:43,366 --> 00:05:44,377
Impact.

72
00:05:44,481 --> 00:05:49,159
I was out of hand! It was a
metaphysical-precision collision.

73
00:05:51,624 --> 00:05:54,162
Was it beautiful for you too, Wendy?

74
00:05:54,377 --> 00:05:56,286
Somebody get me a screwdriver.

75
00:05:56,504 --> 00:05:57,702
And a hammer.

76
00:05:59,340 --> 00:06:04,382
Of course, you do know what it means
to have drunk driving on your record?

77
00:06:04,846 --> 00:06:06,589
I'll never be a cop in D.C.

78
00:06:06,806 --> 00:06:07,885
Wally!

79
00:06:10,226 --> 00:06:11,237
Hi, Wal.

80
00:06:11,342 --> 00:06:12,353
Betrayed.

81
00:06:13,855 --> 00:06:16,346
- So you're not angry?
- No, I'm not angry.

82
00:06:16,566 --> 00:06:19,602
Never trust a woman
who says she isn't angry.

83
00:06:19,902 --> 00:06:21,527
- Tell me about it.
- I'm not.

84
00:06:21,737 --> 00:06:26,198
You're the angry one. I thought
writing for the paper made you happy.

85
00:06:26,450 --> 00:06:29,866
- You should call your wife.
- I'll tell you something, Jules.

86
00:06:30,079 --> 00:06:32,571
Obituaries isn't writing.
All my characters die.

87
00:06:32,833 --> 00:06:35,454
I'd like to write about
the meaning of life.

88
00:06:35,961 --> 00:06:38,997
- You'll get a chance, Kevin.
- Don't hold your breath.

89
00:06:40,424 --> 00:06:41,466
Tommy.

90
00:06:41,633 --> 00:06:42,676
Who's that?

91
00:06:42,968 --> 00:06:46,882
Tommy Bancroft. Senator Hodges'
key guy. I want you to meet him.

92
00:06:47,097 --> 00:06:49,849
- And to be impressive.
- Oh, yes, sir.

93
00:06:50,225 --> 00:06:53,226
The meaning of life,
Kevin, is fun, good times...

94
00:06:53,479 --> 00:06:55,637
...a little H-U-M-O-R.

95
00:06:55,856 --> 00:06:58,429
Don't you enjoy anything anymore?
Like girls?

96
00:06:58,650 --> 00:07:02,862
I enjoy being afraid of Russia.
It makes America feel better.

97
00:07:03,071 --> 00:07:05,942
Russia feels national
worth from our paranoia.

98
00:07:06,200 --> 00:07:07,314
- How's that?
- Good.

99
00:07:07,534 --> 00:07:10,950
Good. I have to check in
with the death squad now.

100
00:07:11,205 --> 00:07:12,615
- Did you see her?
- Who?

101
00:07:12,831 --> 00:07:14,290
- Dale Biberman.
- Who?

102
00:07:14,541 --> 00:07:17,791
No, I said I'm sorry I woke the baby.

103
00:07:19,880 --> 00:07:22,586
Well, I kind of got
in an accident.

104
00:07:24,677 --> 00:07:27,631
I know I don't have insurance.
Just stop shouting.

105
00:07:27,889 --> 00:07:29,680
I need the phone.

106
00:07:29,933 --> 00:07:32,602
- You gonna ask if I'm okay?
- Give me the phone.

107
00:07:32,811 --> 00:07:35,728
Kevin's here. He says
he wants to say hello.

108
00:07:38,274 --> 00:07:39,852
Hi, Felicia. How you doing?

109
00:07:40,068 --> 00:07:42,855
Me? Oh, you know,
it ain't easy being me.

110
00:07:43,071 --> 00:07:46,404
Will you give Billy a break?
He lost his job today.

111
00:07:46,658 --> 00:07:49,908
- The job Alec got for him?
- Yeah.

112
00:07:50,954 --> 00:07:53,658
- Did you give him any money?
- A little.

113
00:07:53,873 --> 00:07:55,073
Wendy!

114
00:07:55,625 --> 00:07:59,492
I thought you were cutting out
things that don't work in your life.

115
00:07:59,712 --> 00:08:01,586
Doesn't leave much.

116
00:08:01,965 --> 00:08:04,290
I better break this to Alec gently.

117
00:08:05,635 --> 00:08:08,091
This thing with Billy
is too destructive.

118
00:08:08,346 --> 00:08:10,173
Life in the fat lane.

119
00:08:10,390 --> 00:08:12,430
Wendy, you're not fat.

120
00:08:13,269 --> 00:08:15,142
My thighs are fat.

121
00:08:15,604 --> 00:08:16,802
No diet works.

122
00:08:17,022 --> 00:08:19,976
Only way to lose weight
in your thighs is amputation.

123
00:08:20,234 --> 00:08:24,066
- What you need to amputate is Billy.
- I know.

124
00:08:24,280 --> 00:08:25,988
I know, but I can't.

125
00:08:26,782 --> 00:08:28,276
I don't get it.

126
00:08:29,285 --> 00:08:30,327
Me neither.

127
00:08:31,370 --> 00:08:35,783
- How about we cut out of here?
- Well, I came with some girlfriends.

128
00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:38,288
Look, this face seats five.

129
00:08:39,170 --> 00:08:40,249
Excuse me.

130
00:08:41,422 --> 00:08:44,292
Could I see you
in the men's room, please?

131
00:08:44,508 --> 00:08:47,082
Sure. Wait,
it'll just be a second.

132
00:08:47,303 --> 00:08:48,303
Alec.

133
00:08:48,804 --> 00:08:49,804
Alec!

134
00:08:52,725 --> 00:08:53,767
Excuse me.

135
00:08:57,354 --> 00:08:59,347
- What?
- Step into my office.

136
00:08:59,565 --> 00:09:00,763
A little pick-me-up?

137
00:09:00,984 --> 00:09:02,478
All right.

138
00:09:03,403 --> 00:09:06,024
Why didn't you tell me
you lost another job?

139
00:09:08,825 --> 00:09:12,028
For some insane reason,
I thought you'd take it badly.

140
00:09:12,245 --> 00:09:15,863
- Don't drown him. He's a father.
- That's right. You're a father.

141
00:09:16,082 --> 00:09:17,956
When are you gonna grow up?

142
00:09:18,210 --> 00:09:20,451
- This is mature, Al.
- I just get angry...

143
00:09:20,670 --> 00:09:22,877
...because you put
pressure on all of us.

144
00:09:23,089 --> 00:09:25,663
Working for Sen. Pomerantz
wasn't for me.

145
00:09:25,884 --> 00:09:29,217
- I'm so sorry.
- It's all right. The wet look is in.

146
00:09:29,429 --> 00:09:32,300
- Asshole.
- That's Mr. Asshole to you.

147
00:09:37,813 --> 00:09:40,648
- How come they put ice in urinals?
- Tastes better.

148
00:10:16,102 --> 00:10:20,515
If we could find the money, it would
be better to get a longer sofa.

149
00:10:20,731 --> 00:10:24,599
Tommy Bancroft said I could work
on the weekends for Hodges.

150
00:10:24,819 --> 00:10:26,099
It's a step up.

151
00:10:26,320 --> 00:10:28,194
Isn't Hodges a Republican?

152
00:10:28,406 --> 00:10:29,900
Oh, my God. You're right.

153
00:10:30,158 --> 00:10:34,487
What happened to that Alec Newberry
political conviction that I love?

154
00:10:34,745 --> 00:10:37,533
Working for a Republican senator
pays more...

155
00:10:37,748 --> 00:10:40,749
...than working for
a Democratic congressman.

156
00:10:40,961 --> 00:10:45,540
We could get the longer sofa,
and we could get married.

157
00:10:45,799 --> 00:10:50,295
- Married? We just moved in together.
- I know. It's great, isn't it?

158
00:10:52,598 --> 00:10:55,053
- We're not ready yet.
- Oh, I am ready.

159
00:10:57,478 --> 00:10:59,269
You're always ready.

160
00:11:06,862 --> 00:11:10,860
I'm gonna get you a red,
lacy babydoll nightgown.

161
00:11:11,366 --> 00:11:14,237
I'm happy in your pajamas,
thank you very much.

162
00:11:14,453 --> 00:11:17,158
I'm happy when you're
out of my pajamas...

163
00:11:17,456 --> 00:11:19,495
...thank you very much.

164
00:11:29,176 --> 00:11:30,800
You don't need that thing.

165
00:11:31,054 --> 00:11:34,553
We're getting married soon.
Let's play some Russian roulette.

166
00:11:34,807 --> 00:11:37,892
And who carries the bullet
around for nine months?

167
00:11:38,144 --> 00:11:39,686
Senator Hodges?

168
00:11:40,772 --> 00:11:41,886
Right.

169
00:11:47,237 --> 00:11:48,279
Jules.

170
00:11:49,197 --> 00:11:53,906
This scuzzy welfare hospital calls me.
Remember my father's second wife?

171
00:11:54,118 --> 00:11:55,151
My step-monster?

172
00:11:55,255 --> 00:11:58,246
The one who locked you in
the closet when you cried?

173
00:11:58,456 --> 00:12:03,533
She lost all my Dad's money, is on her
deathbed and puts me as her next of kin.

174
00:12:03,753 --> 00:12:05,164
What about your father?

175
00:12:05,380 --> 00:12:08,500
He's in South Africa
somewhere with his new wife.

176
00:12:08,716 --> 00:12:11,254
Who's just three years
older than I am.

177
00:12:11,511 --> 00:12:14,796
If I don't find him, I'll be
stuck paying for her funeral.

178
00:12:15,014 --> 00:12:17,505
Is there some insane
irony to this or what?

179
00:12:17,767 --> 00:12:18,965
Thanks, Alec.

180
00:12:19,644 --> 00:12:23,892
Alec is becoming a Republican,
and he wants to get married.

181
00:12:24,108 --> 00:12:25,151
Oh, my God!

182
00:12:25,276 --> 00:12:28,146
I always knew he was a Republican.

183
00:12:28,404 --> 00:12:30,028
What should I do?

184
00:12:30,281 --> 00:12:33,946
- I think you should have another shot.
- I think so too.

185
00:12:37,454 --> 00:12:41,535
You two were the couple always
most likely to couple, don't forget.

186
00:12:42,293 --> 00:12:45,247
I'm sure your father will
take care of everything.

187
00:12:45,504 --> 00:12:48,754
Yes, just like he takes care
of everything else.

188
00:12:50,092 --> 00:12:53,378
You're always coming to my rescue.
What can I say?

189
00:12:53,637 --> 00:12:55,844
I won't come
between two old roommates.

190
00:12:56,974 --> 00:12:58,017
Good night.

191
00:12:58,225 --> 00:12:59,803
Thanks, guys.

192
00:13:53,073 --> 00:13:54,697
What's the meaning of life?

193
00:13:54,950 --> 00:13:56,360
Dale Biberman.

194
00:13:56,618 --> 00:13:57,618
Who?

195
00:13:58,411 --> 00:14:01,117
Dale Biberman. Didn't you
see her at the hospital?

196
00:14:01,374 --> 00:14:04,209
The girl I was in love
with when we were freshmen.

197
00:14:04,418 --> 00:14:08,879
She's about yea tall.
Long dark hair, beautiful face.

198
00:14:09,090 --> 00:14:13,253
Remember that big fountain?
The one on main campus that says...

199
00:14:13,469 --> 00:14:15,758
..."Knowledge, Art, Religion, Life"?

200
00:14:16,013 --> 00:14:17,472
We walked past that...

201
00:14:17,682 --> 00:14:19,840
...she was sitting
on the "Life" side...

202
00:14:20,059 --> 00:14:23,226
...and she just smiled at me.

203
00:14:23,938 --> 00:14:25,977
What? You took her to one movie.

204
00:14:26,190 --> 00:14:29,939
Kevin, there are several
quintessential moments in a man's life:

205
00:14:30,194 --> 00:14:32,270
Losing his virginity,
getting married...

206
00:14:32,488 --> 00:14:35,359
...fatherhood and the right girl
smiling at you.

207
00:14:35,616 --> 00:14:40,741
I'm not going another year finding
your unmailed love-scratchings around.

208
00:14:42,081 --> 00:14:44,074
I have her hospital schedule.

209
00:14:44,917 --> 00:14:47,835
- It's true love, my friend.
- You know what love is?

210
00:14:48,421 --> 00:14:52,420
An illusion created by lawyers to
perpetuate the illusion of marriage...

211
00:14:52,676 --> 00:14:56,377
...and the reality of divorce
and the need for divorce lawyers.

212
00:15:01,476 --> 00:15:04,845
I just can't deal with
the little missis. Can I crash?

213
00:15:09,276 --> 00:15:12,443
You know, there are more
people in law school now...

214
00:15:12,654 --> 00:15:15,359
...than there are lawyers
on the entire planet.

215
00:15:15,574 --> 00:15:19,903
You're just bitter because
you have not had sex in, how long?

216
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:24,829
A year? Refresh my memory. Haven't
you heard of the sexual revolution?

217
00:15:25,042 --> 00:15:27,248
Who won? Huh? Nobody.

218
00:15:27,544 --> 00:15:30,878
Sex used to be a free thing.
No more. Alimony. Palimony.

219
00:15:31,089 --> 00:15:35,218
- It's all financial, an illusion.
- It's the only one that counts.

220
00:15:35,469 --> 00:15:37,296
- Says who?
- Anyone who's been in love.

221
00:15:37,930 --> 00:15:39,009
Love sucks.

222
00:15:39,431 --> 00:15:40,807
So does your attitude.

223
00:15:57,325 --> 00:15:58,523
Thank you.

224
00:16:00,745 --> 00:16:04,613
You should have brought the red dress.
Red drives men wild.

225
00:16:04,874 --> 00:16:06,867
Hi, beautiful. Like Porsches?

226
00:16:07,961 --> 00:16:08,961
See?

227
00:16:09,076 --> 00:16:11,203
I have a madman in my life already.

228
00:16:15,093 --> 00:16:17,085
It's good, isn't it? I like it.

229
00:16:17,303 --> 00:16:20,838
It's interesting.
I forgot to spin at the end.

230
00:16:22,350 --> 00:16:24,177
All right, I'll see you in a bit.

231
00:16:25,311 --> 00:16:27,518
Hey, Jules. Hey, how about a lift?

232
00:16:30,024 --> 00:16:32,314
- Hi, baby.
- Missed you.

233
00:16:32,611 --> 00:16:33,809
How'd you do?

234
00:16:34,280 --> 00:16:38,574
Well, thanks to Alec, I am now
an official pollster.

235
00:16:39,451 --> 00:16:43,781
Who wants to suck back a few
bloody Marys at St. Elmo's, on me?

236
00:16:44,373 --> 00:16:48,205
- No. I have to work.
- Since when do you work on Saturdays?

237
00:16:48,460 --> 00:16:52,328
Since he started volunteer
moonlighting for Senator Hodges.

238
00:16:54,550 --> 00:16:58,215
Why is the president of
Georgetown's Young Democrats...

239
00:16:58,429 --> 00:17:00,053
...working for a Republican?

240
00:17:00,556 --> 00:17:02,347
Moving up, Kirbo.

241
00:17:05,436 --> 00:17:09,019
- Let's get trashed anyway!
- For a change.

242
00:17:15,446 --> 00:17:19,064
- You haven't seen it since I moved in.
- You moved in too?

243
00:17:19,325 --> 00:17:21,733
I only remember 800 pairs of shoes.

244
00:17:26,082 --> 00:17:27,790
So what do you think?

245
00:17:28,418 --> 00:17:30,818
Very subtle.

246
00:17:31,755 --> 00:17:33,629
And very pink.

247
00:17:35,926 --> 00:17:36,968
Jules.

248
00:17:37,677 --> 00:17:39,919
Where do you get
the money for all this?

249
00:17:40,180 --> 00:17:44,427
Why do you think God invented credit?
For fabulous people like me.

250
00:17:44,643 --> 00:17:46,968
Would you fix us a drink?

251
00:17:48,188 --> 00:17:49,848
Kev, I knew you'd like it.

252
00:17:50,065 --> 00:17:52,390
You have such sensitivity.

253
00:17:52,901 --> 00:17:57,978
Oh, by the way, I want you
to meet my decorator, Ron.

254
00:17:58,198 --> 00:18:01,733
He's so fabulous, and he lives
right across the hall.

255
00:18:01,952 --> 00:18:02,952
Ron?

256
00:18:05,455 --> 00:18:06,830
Sit down. Let's relax.

257
00:18:07,082 --> 00:18:10,332
Jules, why do I feel like
I'm not here by accident?

258
00:18:14,924 --> 00:18:17,213
I have been needing to talk to you.

259
00:18:17,510 --> 00:18:20,380
I see one of our infamous
conversations is coming.

260
00:18:20,638 --> 00:18:23,046
Like when you decided
I was adopted.

261
00:18:23,307 --> 00:18:24,307
Remember that?

262
00:18:24,405 --> 00:18:27,553
I still think your mother's
hiding something from you.

263
00:18:30,022 --> 00:18:32,015
Kevin, I'm curious.

264
00:18:33,025 --> 00:18:35,777
You know all those nights
we stayed up talking?

265
00:18:37,488 --> 00:18:40,158
How come you never made a pass at me?

266
00:18:44,036 --> 00:18:45,036
What?

267
00:18:45,663 --> 00:18:47,406
Don't you find me attractive?

268
00:18:47,623 --> 00:18:52,748
You know you're the only guy at school
who never made a pass at me?

269
00:18:53,796 --> 00:18:55,955
Well, I never joined the Army either.

270
00:18:56,174 --> 00:18:57,716
Kev, you've got a problem.

271
00:18:57,967 --> 00:19:01,218
You're gay, and you're
madly in love with Alec.

272
00:19:03,307 --> 00:19:04,349
I see.

273
00:19:04,641 --> 00:19:07,726
It's okay. We all love Alec.
He's our hero.

274
00:19:07,978 --> 00:19:11,228
But he's very, very straight.
And very taken.

275
00:19:11,440 --> 00:19:16,268
Jules, there's the brink of insanity,
and then there is the abyss...

276
00:19:16,486 --> 00:19:19,404
- ...which you have fallen into.
- Don't be ashamed.

277
00:19:19,615 --> 00:19:22,699
- Gay became chic in the '70s.
- No, I'm not ashamed.

278
00:19:23,285 --> 00:19:25,858
I am not gay.
And I am not staying.

279
00:19:26,121 --> 00:19:27,321
Kevin!

280
00:19:29,500 --> 00:19:31,291
Look at me. Are you hard? No.

281
00:19:31,502 --> 00:19:35,879
Let me just introduce you to Ron.
He's gay too, and he's so fabulous.

282
00:19:36,089 --> 00:19:38,497
Ron, Kevin's here!
Kevin, wait, please.

283
00:19:38,717 --> 00:19:41,884
I've seen enough pink for today,
thank you very much.

284
00:19:44,556 --> 00:19:48,340
He's just not ready to face
reality yet. I'll get back to you.

285
00:19:48,560 --> 00:19:49,805
Please.

286
00:20:08,373 --> 00:20:10,698
Excuse me, sir.
We do not open until 11.

287
00:20:10,959 --> 00:20:12,536
That's cool. I'll wait.

288
00:20:14,087 --> 00:20:15,462
Do you have a reservation?

289
00:20:15,672 --> 00:20:19,456
It's for Keager. Party of two,
1:00. And I want this table.

290
00:20:20,635 --> 00:20:23,969
I'd be very happy to find
a lovely table for you...

291
00:20:24,180 --> 00:20:25,888
...but this is a table for four.

292
00:20:28,059 --> 00:20:29,802
Well, then I'll pay double.

293
00:20:30,019 --> 00:20:32,724
You could order a nice
Napa Valley chardonnay.

294
00:20:32,939 --> 00:20:35,856
Or if she's worth it,
get an import to impress her.

295
00:20:36,401 --> 00:20:37,599
Well, money's no object.

296
00:20:37,819 --> 00:20:38,819
<i>Really?</i>

297
00:20:38,917 --> 00:20:42,777
<i>Then Montrachet or Meursault.</i>

298
00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:46,112
And make sure you smell the cork.
So who is she?

299
00:20:46,370 --> 00:20:47,413
Never mind.

300
00:20:48,497 --> 00:20:50,324
Thank God it's payday!

301
00:20:51,208 --> 00:20:54,209
Jules, you're advanced
on your salary by two months.

302
00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:57,337
- I have no check for you.
<i>- Thanks, Jules. I owe you.</i>

303
00:20:57,548 --> 00:21:00,003
That's good because
I owe everyone else.

304
00:21:04,471 --> 00:21:08,469
Judy, I have to pay for my stepmom's
funeral, then I'll catch up.

305
00:21:08,726 --> 00:21:11,976
I'm afraid you'll have to speak
with Forrester Davidson.

306
00:21:12,688 --> 00:21:14,681
The president of the bank?

307
00:21:19,945 --> 00:21:21,985
I'm sorry I'm late.

308
00:21:24,158 --> 00:21:25,533
Thank you.

309
00:21:25,743 --> 00:21:28,448
- Have you been waiting long?
- Just got here.

310
00:21:28,662 --> 00:21:30,537
The food is great here.

311
00:21:30,749 --> 00:21:35,162
Yes, and I'll be having alfalfa
sprouts and a plate of mashed yeast.

312
00:21:35,378 --> 00:21:36,458
You're vegetarian?

313
00:21:37,923 --> 00:21:42,051
That's from <i>Annie Hall.</i>
The movie we saw together. Remember?

314
00:21:42,302 --> 00:21:45,089
That's funny. I thought we
saw a Mel Brooks movie.

315
00:21:45,305 --> 00:21:47,214
No, no. It was <i>Annie Hall.</i>

316
00:21:53,980 --> 00:21:55,178
Miss Biberman?

317
00:21:56,274 --> 00:21:57,472
- Telephone.
- Thank you.

318
00:22:00,320 --> 00:22:03,689
Yes, doctor. I'm sorry.
I have to go to the hospital.

319
00:22:04,533 --> 00:22:06,655
I hope we can do this again sometime.

320
00:22:06,910 --> 00:22:07,910
When?

321
00:22:08,119 --> 00:22:10,326
Why don't you call me?
I'm so sorry.

322
00:22:11,706 --> 00:22:12,869
Great.

323
00:22:15,961 --> 00:22:20,754
You're not going to med school to
impress a girl you're infatuated with?

324
00:22:20,967 --> 00:22:24,170
It's not just infatuation,
and she's not just a girl.

325
00:22:24,387 --> 00:22:27,257
She's the only evidence
of God I can find.

326
00:22:27,473 --> 00:22:29,798
With the exception
of the mystical force...

327
00:22:30,059 --> 00:22:33,095
...that always removes one of
my socks from the dryer.

328
00:22:34,939 --> 00:22:36,848
Fluff and fold, buddy.

329
00:22:37,358 --> 00:22:40,809
As soon as I make it really big,
I'm going fluff and fold.

330
00:22:41,028 --> 00:22:42,028
Dreamer.

331
00:22:42,126 --> 00:22:46,448
- I understand fold, but what's fluff?
- Fluff's what I write for the paper.

332
00:22:48,619 --> 00:22:51,656
- What am I doing wrong here?
- Let me see.

333
00:22:56,669 --> 00:22:58,329
Listen, Les...

334
00:22:58,838 --> 00:23:01,293
You think my attachment
to Alec is unnatural?

335
00:23:01,507 --> 00:23:03,796
No. I think mine is.

336
00:23:04,051 --> 00:23:08,381
- He tell you he wants to get married?
- Four years ago, the day he met you.

337
00:23:08,639 --> 00:23:12,389
But he was a Democrat then.
Now he's a Republican, so who knows.

338
00:23:13,562 --> 00:23:16,100
God! How do women
do this every night...

339
00:23:16,315 --> 00:23:18,936
- ...and not go insane?
- They are insane.

340
00:23:19,151 --> 00:23:22,935
Love, marriage, children,
relationships. It's all insane.

341
00:23:24,281 --> 00:23:26,689
- You're okay.
- Thanks.

342
00:23:26,992 --> 00:23:31,701
My perfect sister and her perfect
husband are getting a perfect divorce.

343
00:23:32,414 --> 00:23:36,163
I have the perfect solution.
Stay away from love.

344
00:23:36,752 --> 00:23:38,294
I can't.

345
00:23:38,504 --> 00:23:40,081
Kevin, you've been in love.

346
00:23:40,339 --> 00:23:42,711
- Doesn't Alec hate peppers?
- Oh, come on.

347
00:23:43,217 --> 00:23:47,510
You must have been in love
with someone, sometime.

348
00:23:47,721 --> 00:23:48,764
Yeah, once.

349
00:23:51,141 --> 00:23:55,305
Junior high, I played bongos in a band,
and I fell in love with the singer.

350
00:23:55,562 --> 00:24:00,308
And she sang "We've Only Just Begun"
as sweet as Karen Carpenter.

351
00:24:00,568 --> 00:24:05,064
One night, I got high on cheap malt
liquor, and I pledged my love to her.

352
00:24:05,281 --> 00:24:08,033
Next day she ran off with
a bassist named Ringo.

353
00:24:09,994 --> 00:24:13,659
So I turned in my bongos for
a battered Underwood typewriter.

354
00:24:13,873 --> 00:24:17,918
On which you'll type your way
to becoming one of the best...

355
00:24:18,127 --> 00:24:19,456
...writers in America.

356
00:24:20,797 --> 00:24:23,039
I wouldn't hold your breath.

357
00:24:23,299 --> 00:24:27,344
I can't even organize my thoughts
into anything for the paper.

358
00:24:27,554 --> 00:24:31,254
Kevin, you need to stop thinking
so much and fall in love again.

359
00:24:31,474 --> 00:24:32,672
Love sucks.

360
00:24:35,728 --> 00:24:37,187
Hi, guys.

361
00:24:38,815 --> 00:24:40,475
Rough day on the right wing?

362
00:24:42,193 --> 00:24:43,652
This is for me?

363
00:24:50,494 --> 00:24:51,823
Try it on.

364
00:24:52,496 --> 00:24:54,204
Kevin, stir the vegetables.

365
00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:57,198
Right.

366
00:24:58,919 --> 00:25:01,126
Leslie has to marry me soon.

367
00:25:01,338 --> 00:25:02,881
Why? Are you pregnant?

368
00:25:03,132 --> 00:25:04,756
What is your marriage hurry?

369
00:25:05,009 --> 00:25:06,207
I'm gonna kill myself.

370
00:25:06,427 --> 00:25:08,087
It's only peppers, Al.

371
00:25:08,554 --> 00:25:10,297
I can't believe what I did.

372
00:25:10,514 --> 00:25:12,590
I innocently go to buy the nightgown...

373
00:25:12,808 --> 00:25:16,758
...and this amazingly leggy blond
salesgirl offers to model it for me.

374
00:25:16,979 --> 00:25:20,597
So we do it in the dressing room
in front of a three-way mirror.

375
00:25:20,858 --> 00:25:22,233
So there were six of you.

376
00:25:24,820 --> 00:25:26,362
If Leslie would just marry me.

377
00:25:26,572 --> 00:25:28,031
Marriage will make you faithful?

378
00:25:28,240 --> 00:25:29,240
Yes.

379
00:25:29,377 --> 00:25:32,237
The idea of marriage
was invented by people...

380
00:25:32,495 --> 00:25:36,444
...who were lucky to make it to 20
without being eaten by dinosaurs.

381
00:25:36,707 --> 00:25:38,249
Marriage is obsolete.

382
00:25:38,459 --> 00:25:41,876
Dinosaurs are obsolete.
Marriage is still around.

383
00:25:42,088 --> 00:25:45,292
Alec, come here. This is obscene!

384
00:25:45,800 --> 00:25:47,259
I love it.

385
00:25:48,887 --> 00:25:50,796
Stir those vegetables.

386
00:25:53,683 --> 00:25:54,726
Don't look!

387
00:25:54,976 --> 00:25:56,850
Don't look.

388
00:26:00,273 --> 00:26:01,851
Oh, come on.

389
00:26:05,695 --> 00:26:06,976
- Kevin...
- I don't care.

390
00:26:07,197 --> 00:26:09,189
Get off!
He'll burn my vegetables!

391
00:26:09,449 --> 00:26:12,284
- No, he knows what he's doing.
- No, he doesn't.

392
00:26:13,620 --> 00:26:15,198
Get off of me!

393
00:26:18,708 --> 00:26:20,416
Look at this creep.

394
00:26:27,300 --> 00:26:29,376
Hi, you want a date?

395
00:26:33,140 --> 00:26:36,889
- Hi, you want a date?
- Maybe later, baby.

396
00:26:40,022 --> 00:26:42,513
How come you never ask me
if I want a date?

397
00:26:43,442 --> 00:26:45,435
Because I thought you were gay.

398
00:26:48,614 --> 00:26:50,441
Why would you think I'm gay?

399
00:26:51,367 --> 00:26:55,614
Because I never see you with a girl.
And you always look real strange.

400
00:26:56,247 --> 00:26:59,912
I happen to be in love with someone,
only they don't know it, okay?

401
00:27:02,628 --> 00:27:06,412
Guess you wouldn't understand about
loving someone from afar, huh?

402
00:27:07,842 --> 00:27:11,293
Delaware's about as far
as I've ever been.

403
00:27:15,141 --> 00:27:18,592
Is this person a he or a she?

404
00:27:21,690 --> 00:27:25,735
It's a secret. I guess you
wouldn't understand that either.

405
00:27:25,944 --> 00:27:30,322
You know, darling, lots of people
come to me for love...

406
00:27:30,574 --> 00:27:32,982
...and it's a secret.

407
00:27:39,124 --> 00:27:40,239
Come back here.

408
00:27:40,459 --> 00:27:44,670
This secret of yours, is it
a little one or a big one?

409
00:27:47,633 --> 00:27:49,839
Hey, you want a date?

410
00:28:02,147 --> 00:28:03,190
Alec Newberry.

411
00:28:03,315 --> 00:28:07,609
Hi, Alec. It's Jules.
I'm over at the Van Buren Hotel.

412
00:28:08,529 --> 00:28:10,902
<i>- What time is it?</i>
- I don't know.

413
00:28:11,115 --> 00:28:13,903
These Arabs have been
forcing me to do coke...

414
00:28:14,118 --> 00:28:17,950
<i>... all night. I don't
understand very much Arabic...</i>

415
00:28:18,164 --> 00:28:21,201
...but I think I heard
the words for "gangbang".

416
00:28:21,459 --> 00:28:23,416
Alec, you gotta come get me.

417
00:28:23,628 --> 00:28:26,878
Please? I'm in the Potomac Suite.

418
00:28:28,132 --> 00:28:32,000
- Alec, you should be sainted.
- No, then I'd have to wear underwear.

419
00:28:32,679 --> 00:28:33,721
I love you.

420
00:28:33,930 --> 00:28:35,210
Then marry me.

421
00:28:45,608 --> 00:28:48,894
- Yes, who is it?
- Open the door!

422
00:28:53,074 --> 00:28:55,992
Alec, what are you doing here?

423
00:28:59,038 --> 00:29:02,704
They hardly impressed me
as the gang-bang type.

424
00:29:02,918 --> 00:29:06,619
- How much coke did you do?
- Don't know. They have barrels full.

425
00:29:06,839 --> 00:29:11,216
Jules, sometimes I think you
make these dramas up to test me.

426
00:29:14,013 --> 00:29:16,005
Why don't you come over?

427
00:29:16,932 --> 00:29:20,348
- I have to be at work in the morning.
- Come on.

428
00:29:20,561 --> 00:29:21,561
No.

429
00:29:23,189 --> 00:29:24,980
Well, I don't wanna be alone.

430
00:29:29,612 --> 00:29:30,691
Who are you calling?

431
00:29:30,905 --> 00:29:32,897
A systems analyst.

432
00:29:33,115 --> 00:29:34,657
A very hot Jewish guy.

433
00:29:34,867 --> 00:29:37,488
Are you the new Mideast ambassador?

434
00:29:38,537 --> 00:29:39,700
Let me drive you home.

435
00:29:39,914 --> 00:29:41,871
And waste all this good coke?

436
00:29:45,503 --> 00:29:47,910
It's Jules. Did I wake you?

437
00:29:49,465 --> 00:29:54,424
Our purpose is to get you off welfare
and train you in a skilled profession.

438
00:29:54,638 --> 00:29:57,093
Are you interested
in the janitorial field?

439
00:29:57,307 --> 00:29:58,682
Just give me my check.

440
00:30:00,352 --> 00:30:03,388
- There are some educational...
- Just give me my check.

441
00:30:09,069 --> 00:30:12,272
Get yourself some hot clothes,
and get yourself a man...

442
00:30:12,489 --> 00:30:15,027
...and you won't be worrying
about this shit.

443
00:30:30,674 --> 00:30:33,793
Welfare recipients are
getting better-looking.

444
00:30:35,512 --> 00:30:38,963
You ever feel like you're not
accomplishing anything all?

445
00:30:40,016 --> 00:30:42,722
I think I'm in touch
with that emotion.

446
00:30:44,730 --> 00:30:45,810
Let's get a drink.

447
00:30:50,486 --> 00:30:53,736
Billy, how come you're not at work?

448
00:31:00,746 --> 00:31:06,041
And this is our first store,
built in 1953.

449
00:31:06,711 --> 00:31:08,584
We now have 24 Card-a-terias...

450
00:31:08,796 --> 00:31:13,541
...the largest greeting cards
franchise in the East.

451
00:31:14,260 --> 00:31:16,134
What line are you in?

452
00:31:17,430 --> 00:31:18,628
Munitions.

453
00:31:21,100 --> 00:31:22,559
Don't bring up moving out.

454
00:31:22,768 --> 00:31:25,722
Daddy'll have a heart attack
in front of your boyfriend.

455
00:31:25,938 --> 00:31:27,516
He's not my boyfriend.

456
00:31:27,732 --> 00:31:30,520
Well, then there's a nice
young guy working for us.

457
00:31:30,777 --> 00:31:33,351
- Howie Krantz.
- Libby, please.

458
00:31:33,572 --> 00:31:37,783
Candace, do like grandmother did.
In the center of the plate, neatly.

459
00:31:37,993 --> 00:31:39,487
Mom, you look beautiful.

460
00:31:39,745 --> 00:31:42,580
I'm fat, I'm thin.
I'm blond, I'm brunette.

461
00:31:42,789 --> 00:31:47,368
Well, you always wanted to look
like Elizabeth Taylor, and now you do.

462
00:31:52,591 --> 00:31:55,711
My mother finds certain words
too horrible to utter...

463
00:31:55,928 --> 00:31:58,964
...so she whispers them.
You'll get used to it.

464
00:31:59,556 --> 00:32:01,596
Did you hear about Betty Rothberg?

465
00:32:01,808 --> 00:32:02,851
Cancer.

466
00:32:04,061 --> 00:32:06,766
Say, Bill, the day I married Rachael...

467
00:32:07,022 --> 00:32:11,269
...I got three Card-a-terias.
I just bought a new BMW.

468
00:32:11,485 --> 00:32:12,860
How great!

469
00:32:13,111 --> 00:32:15,899
Betty's daughter moved
into the new neighborhood.

470
00:32:16,615 --> 00:32:18,442
Only six Jewish families.

471
00:32:18,700 --> 00:32:20,279
But very wealthy.

472
00:32:22,789 --> 00:32:24,663
Are you in the card game too?

473
00:32:24,874 --> 00:32:26,119
Six franchises.

474
00:32:27,001 --> 00:32:29,290
Where did you meet Wendy again?

475
00:32:30,213 --> 00:32:31,613
Prison.

476
00:32:31,840 --> 00:32:33,298
What did he say?

477
00:32:33,716 --> 00:32:35,543
Is $200 enough?

478
00:32:35,927 --> 00:32:38,928
$200 is more than enough.
Thank you, Dad.

479
00:32:39,138 --> 00:32:40,181
Thanks.

480
00:32:40,348 --> 00:32:42,804
If you'd get married
and run a franchise...

481
00:32:43,017 --> 00:32:45,176
...you wouldn't have to borrow money.

482
00:32:45,395 --> 00:32:48,230
I have a job with
the Department of Human Services.

483
00:32:48,439 --> 00:32:51,808
That isn't a job. It's killing time
until you get married.

484
00:32:52,026 --> 00:32:54,066
Thank you. I'm very committed.

485
00:32:54,279 --> 00:32:57,066
Daddy, I think I should
get my own apartment.

486
00:32:57,490 --> 00:32:58,735
Grandpa! Grandpa!

487
00:32:58,950 --> 00:33:01,239
- Billy's on the roof!
- What?

488
00:33:02,704 --> 00:33:04,946
Wait a minute. Wait, wait.

489
00:33:17,761 --> 00:33:19,754
This is so great!

490
00:33:20,472 --> 00:33:23,723
All the years we lived here,
no one ever did this.

491
00:33:24,268 --> 00:33:26,225
I used to do it all the time.

492
00:33:26,729 --> 00:33:31,640
At the frat house, I'd crawl out of
Alec's window on the roof with my horn.

493
00:33:31,901 --> 00:33:33,525
This is ridiculous!

494
00:33:34,528 --> 00:33:36,236
My God! Wendy's up there too!

495
00:33:36,447 --> 00:33:37,858
Come on down here!

496
00:33:38,324 --> 00:33:41,028
I knew it the minute
he came in. Drugs!

497
00:33:41,827 --> 00:33:44,116
Should we call the police
or fire department?

498
00:33:44,330 --> 00:33:46,536
Maybe we should let Wendy handle it.

499
00:33:51,212 --> 00:33:52,622
You miss school, don't you?

500
00:33:54,256 --> 00:33:55,256
Yeah.

501
00:33:58,802 --> 00:34:00,879
School was pretty out of hand.

502
00:34:07,312 --> 00:34:10,266
In everyday life,
there's just no way...

503
00:34:10,482 --> 00:34:12,106
...to be out of hand.

504
00:34:12,817 --> 00:34:14,609
You gotta be so...

505
00:34:18,823 --> 00:34:21,493
You know, if it ever
got to be too much...

506
00:34:23,787 --> 00:34:25,032
Like just...

507
00:34:25,247 --> 00:34:26,705
...too much.

508
00:34:32,796 --> 00:34:35,038
Well, that's out of hand.

509
00:34:39,511 --> 00:34:40,756
Ever think about it?

510
00:34:41,346 --> 00:34:43,386
Not while I'm still a virgin.

511
00:34:48,061 --> 00:34:49,721
Why didn't you tell me that?

512
00:34:51,315 --> 00:34:52,358
I don't know.

513
00:34:53,901 --> 00:34:56,986
Come on. I mean, all those
guys you went out with...

514
00:34:57,238 --> 00:34:58,353
Stuey Newman?

515
00:34:59,490 --> 00:35:01,317
Oh, please.

516
00:35:01,826 --> 00:35:03,617
You'd do it with Stuey Newman?

517
00:35:04,287 --> 00:35:05,287
Well?

518
00:35:19,468 --> 00:35:20,963
"Be vewy quiet."

519
00:35:21,220 --> 00:35:23,427
"I'm hunting wabbit."

520
00:35:39,697 --> 00:35:40,697
Nice.

521
00:35:52,502 --> 00:35:54,080
I'm sorry.

522
00:35:55,005 --> 00:35:56,796
- Peace.
- I'm sorry.

523
00:36:03,764 --> 00:36:05,341
What the hell is that?

524
00:36:09,061 --> 00:36:10,970
It's your scuba suit.

525
00:36:17,110 --> 00:36:20,942
I'm sorry. You're allowed
to have fun when you're screwing.

526
00:36:22,824 --> 00:36:24,283
Wend, I was...

527
00:36:24,493 --> 00:36:25,987
I'm sorry.

528
00:36:26,286 --> 00:36:29,121
I don't think we should
see each other anymore.

529
00:36:31,042 --> 00:36:32,042
What?

530
00:36:35,213 --> 00:36:37,040
There's your rent money.

531
00:38:09,558 --> 00:38:13,806
I wanna meet the woman who's
turning Kirbo Keager into a doctor.

532
00:38:14,022 --> 00:38:16,893
Hey, I've been an amateur
gynecologist for years.

533
00:38:17,108 --> 00:38:18,353
Billy is great.

534
00:38:18,568 --> 00:38:20,110
He's unbelievable.

535
00:38:20,362 --> 00:38:22,153
Leslie, did I tell you?

536
00:38:22,864 --> 00:38:26,565
I thought I was getting fired.
Instead, my boss took me to dinner.

537
00:38:26,785 --> 00:38:31,363
- I told you not to bop your boss.
- Too late. I'm gonna dance.

538
00:38:44,261 --> 00:38:46,799
Can I borrow a key
to your apartment tomorrow?

539
00:38:47,013 --> 00:38:48,056
What for?

540
00:38:48,223 --> 00:38:52,007
The lingerie salesgirl has been
calling me at the office.

541
00:38:52,269 --> 00:38:55,685
- You gotta learn to say no.
- When Leslie says yes, I will.

542
00:38:55,897 --> 00:38:56,976
Wendy.

543
00:38:58,525 --> 00:39:01,195
- This is Howie Krantz.
- Howie, Kevin Dolenz.

544
00:39:01,445 --> 00:39:03,237
- How do you do?
- Alec Newberry.

545
00:39:03,447 --> 00:39:05,773
Nice to meet you.
You wanna sit with us?

546
00:39:06,033 --> 00:39:07,825
Oh, great. That'd be great.

547
00:39:08,536 --> 00:39:12,154
- Thought you weren't coming here.
- We were passing by.

548
00:39:12,373 --> 00:39:16,585
I'm in the greeting cards business.
I work for Wendy's brother-in-law.

549
00:39:16,794 --> 00:39:19,499
Humongous future in greeting cards.

550
00:39:50,537 --> 00:39:51,537
Ron!

551
00:40:00,047 --> 00:40:04,175
Everybody, this is my friend
and decorator, Ron Dellasandro.

552
00:40:04,384 --> 00:40:05,629
You remember Ron.

553
00:40:05,886 --> 00:40:07,510
- Hello, Ron.
- Hi, Ron.

554
00:40:07,763 --> 00:40:09,802
- Hi, Kevin.
- Hi, Ron.

555
00:40:10,057 --> 00:40:12,429
And this is Wendy and Howie.

556
00:40:17,231 --> 00:40:19,022
- Unbelievable.
- What?

557
00:40:19,858 --> 00:40:22,314
- So what's wrong?
- Billy's wife.

558
00:40:22,528 --> 00:40:23,570
Who's she with?

559
00:40:46,052 --> 00:40:47,380
Let's rock!

560
00:41:29,429 --> 00:41:31,257
Take your hands off my wife.

561
00:41:31,557 --> 00:41:33,181
Your wife?

562
00:41:33,392 --> 00:41:36,927
You're not married to me.
You're married to your friends.

563
00:41:39,106 --> 00:41:41,727
I said get your hands off my wife.

564
00:41:42,651 --> 00:41:43,932
Is he kidding?

565
00:41:54,830 --> 00:41:56,538
Get him out of here!

566
00:41:56,874 --> 00:41:58,416
Yeah, you little shit!

567
00:41:58,667 --> 00:41:59,700
You're a shit!

568
00:41:59,804 --> 00:42:00,908
You're fired!

569
00:42:01,128 --> 00:42:03,417
So are the rest of you.
Everybody out!

570
00:42:07,092 --> 00:42:09,465
- He's bleeding.
- Yes, I know. Come on.

571
00:42:10,804 --> 00:42:13,640
- Come on.
- I just had my nose done!

572
00:42:14,558 --> 00:42:15,969
Goddamn it!

573
00:42:16,185 --> 00:42:19,269
I tell you, I should've
had a vasectomy at birth.

574
00:42:19,855 --> 00:42:24,186
If you ever have boys, do them a favor
and get them neutered right away.

575
00:42:24,569 --> 00:42:28,270
Because if they knock up some slut,
they're the ones who are fucked!

576
00:42:28,532 --> 00:42:30,405
I hate you, you little bitch!

577
00:42:31,451 --> 00:42:33,657
Listen, you stupid pig!

578
00:42:35,163 --> 00:42:36,907
Get off me! Get off of me!

579
00:42:57,894 --> 00:43:00,812
You just go ahead with
your evening with Howie.

580
00:43:01,064 --> 00:43:04,515
Yes. No matter what he looks like.

581
00:43:09,406 --> 00:43:11,198
Happy Halloween.

582
00:43:26,382 --> 00:43:28,624
Hi, secret love.

583
00:43:29,302 --> 00:43:33,086
Trick or treat?
Or tricks and treats?

584
00:43:34,015 --> 00:43:36,636
What would you say
the meaning of life is?

585
00:43:37,101 --> 00:43:39,806
Got 50 bucks? I'll show you
the meaning of life.

586
00:43:40,062 --> 00:43:41,605
I don't pay for sex.

587
00:43:41,814 --> 00:43:43,214
Oh, no?

588
00:43:44,567 --> 00:43:47,936
You think that
if you get a little wife...

589
00:43:48,196 --> 00:43:51,031
...or girlfriend that you don't pay?

590
00:43:51,240 --> 00:43:52,485
You pay.

591
00:43:53,201 --> 00:43:56,285
Then you can't be sure
you'll get it. With Naomi...

592
00:43:56,537 --> 00:43:57,737
Naomi?

593
00:43:58,372 --> 00:44:01,208
You pay, and you get it.

594
00:44:03,128 --> 00:44:05,619
You get it good.

595
00:44:07,966 --> 00:44:09,342
Food for thought.

596
00:44:09,551 --> 00:44:11,674
Food for thought.

597
00:44:14,681 --> 00:44:17,351
I don't think I have
enough food to feed them.

598
00:44:17,601 --> 00:44:21,266
Oh, we'll have plenty.
We'll be fine. There'll be enough.

599
00:44:22,564 --> 00:44:24,391
What are you doing here?

600
00:44:24,900 --> 00:44:27,569
We're taking you to lunch.
Le Petit Château.

601
00:44:27,778 --> 00:44:30,067
I can't leave and go to
Le Petit Château.

602
00:44:30,280 --> 00:44:32,771
Ladies, please, have
a little perspective.

603
00:44:33,033 --> 00:44:34,860
Well, we could eat here.

604
00:44:35,118 --> 00:44:36,910
- We could?
- Yes.

605
00:44:37,496 --> 00:44:38,496
It's nutritious.

606
00:44:38,594 --> 00:44:40,697
- Yes, it's an adventure.
- Grab a tray.

607
00:44:40,958 --> 00:44:42,535
It is that.

608
00:44:43,043 --> 00:44:44,122
Take this.

609
00:44:47,297 --> 00:44:52,340
And for our entrée,
Campbell mushroom barley. How chic.

610
00:44:52,845 --> 00:44:56,345
Hi, Myra. Meet my friends
Leslie and Jules. This is Myra.

611
00:44:56,599 --> 00:44:57,797
Hi, Myra.

612
00:44:58,059 --> 00:44:59,601
You need some salad.

613
00:44:59,811 --> 00:45:01,305
How's Howie?

614
00:45:02,063 --> 00:45:05,728
Well, I wouldn't say
my father's trying to bribe me...

615
00:45:05,984 --> 00:45:09,684
...but he did offer me a convertible
if I'd get engaged to Howie.

616
00:45:09,946 --> 00:45:13,030
- Have you fucked him yet?
- Jules! God!

617
00:45:13,241 --> 00:45:17,570
Get the car, fuck him, and if you
don't like it, break the engagement.

618
00:45:18,454 --> 00:45:20,281
Then you can still fuck him.

619
00:45:21,374 --> 00:45:22,785
- Sorry.
- Not funny!

620
00:45:23,042 --> 00:45:24,371
Sorry. Thank you.

621
00:45:31,175 --> 00:45:33,464
I don't wanna beat around the bush.

622
00:45:33,720 --> 00:45:36,970
We really came here because
we're both worried about you.

623
00:45:38,308 --> 00:45:42,389
No, Jules, actually that was a scam
that Leslie and I worked out...

624
00:45:42,646 --> 00:45:44,686
...because we're worried about you.

625
00:45:46,376 --> 00:45:48,576
<i>Moi?</i>

626
00:45:50,988 --> 00:45:52,031
So what's up?

627
00:45:52,489 --> 00:45:54,945
We're worried about
this affair with your boss.

628
00:45:56,035 --> 00:45:57,233
Forrester?

629
00:45:57,453 --> 00:45:59,161
Come on. He's wonderful.

630
00:45:59,371 --> 00:46:00,700
Forrester is married.

631
00:46:01,832 --> 00:46:03,492
Leslie, this is the '80s.

632
00:46:03,751 --> 00:46:08,460
I bop him, get his job when he gets
his hand caught in the vault...

633
00:46:08,714 --> 00:46:12,628
...become a legend, get caught in a
sex scandal, retire in disgrace...

634
00:46:12,843 --> 00:46:16,592
...write a bestseller and become
the host of my own talk show.

635
00:46:17,514 --> 00:46:19,341
Well, silly of us to worry.

636
00:46:19,600 --> 00:46:22,684
It really is.
He's helped me so much.

637
00:46:22,895 --> 00:46:26,809
He's come up with so many alternatives
for my step-monster's funeral.

638
00:46:27,066 --> 00:46:28,311
That's another thing.

639
00:46:28,567 --> 00:46:32,696
You seem obsessed with
this woman dying. It's creepy.

640
00:46:32,948 --> 00:46:36,815
It turns out cremation is just
as expensive as the non-torch method.

641
00:46:37,035 --> 00:46:40,985
If I don't come up with a cheaper
solution, I'll end up a bag lady.

642
00:46:41,206 --> 00:46:43,282
Of course, I'll have alligator bags.

643
00:46:46,294 --> 00:46:50,209
I've gotta go. I just remembered
I'm supposed to meet Forrester.

644
00:46:50,840 --> 00:46:52,383
You haven't eaten.

645
00:46:52,926 --> 00:46:56,461
I really didn't want any.
I'll talk to you guys later.

646
00:46:56,680 --> 00:46:57,925
Nice meeting you, Myra.

647
00:46:58,390 --> 00:47:01,841
I'll talk to you guys later, okay?
Sorry. I have to go.

648
00:47:05,397 --> 00:47:06,855
Oh, God.

649
00:47:07,315 --> 00:47:08,513
I told you.

650
00:47:09,568 --> 00:47:12,771
Why is it that you
and Jules and my mother...

651
00:47:12,988 --> 00:47:16,688
...and everyone I know are so sure
I should marry Alec?

652
00:47:16,950 --> 00:47:20,402
If you and Alec don't get married,
I don't know who should.

653
00:47:20,621 --> 00:47:22,281
I love Alec.

654
00:47:22,999 --> 00:47:26,083
It's scary to think of spending
my whole life with him.

655
00:47:26,335 --> 00:47:29,787
Then again, it's scary to think
of life without him too.

656
00:47:30,923 --> 00:47:33,960
Men: Can't live with them,
can't shoot them.

657
00:47:38,598 --> 00:47:40,008
Seen Billy?

658
00:47:40,641 --> 00:47:43,393
I wondered how long
it'd take till you asked me.

659
00:47:43,603 --> 00:47:46,094
I know. It's like stopping smoking.

660
00:47:46,355 --> 00:47:49,605
I go as long as I can,
and then I just gotta have a hit.

661
00:47:50,276 --> 00:47:53,111
Alec's got him working
for this Korean gangster...

662
00:47:53,321 --> 00:47:56,238
...and I think Billy's
doing a really good job.

663
00:47:56,449 --> 00:47:57,649
Great.

664
00:47:58,034 --> 00:47:59,409
That's great.

665
00:48:00,244 --> 00:48:01,904
What? It's great.

666
00:48:18,472 --> 00:48:19,672
Kim...

667
00:48:21,193 --> 00:48:23,804
I thought you were
coming back on Thursday.

668
00:49:19,325 --> 00:49:20,950
Watch your step.

669
00:50:25,517 --> 00:50:28,009
Excuse me, sir,
do you have an invitation?

670
00:50:34,068 --> 00:50:35,182
Excuse me.

671
00:50:42,494 --> 00:50:43,537
Kirby!

672
00:50:44,246 --> 00:50:45,574
How are you?

673
00:50:45,789 --> 00:50:48,458
I'm obsessed, thank you very much.

674
00:50:49,668 --> 00:50:51,791
But you don't even know me.

675
00:50:52,671 --> 00:50:55,707
I'm very average. Full of flaws.

676
00:50:57,050 --> 00:51:00,751
I'm a slob.
I can't even make a bed straight.

677
00:51:04,099 --> 00:51:07,634
I steal <i>People</i> magazine
from my dentist's office.

678
00:51:09,813 --> 00:51:10,975
And look.

679
00:51:11,898 --> 00:51:14,306
I rarely take out the garbage.

680
00:51:15,151 --> 00:51:17,773
Here's my roommate, Judith.
She hates me.

681
00:51:18,655 --> 00:51:19,983
I hate her.

682
00:51:46,601 --> 00:51:48,724
And here's the worst of all.

683
00:51:49,854 --> 00:51:54,350
When I first decided to be a doctor,
I thought I wanted to serve people.

684
00:51:54,609 --> 00:51:56,067
But now, well...

685
00:51:56,277 --> 00:52:00,524
...I'm starting to feel that what
medicine's really all about is money.

686
00:52:03,534 --> 00:52:06,784
- Would you like some coffee?
- It's money, isn't it?

687
00:52:07,330 --> 00:52:11,078
That's what you're telling me.
It's because I don't have any money.

688
00:52:11,626 --> 00:52:13,168
Thank you for being honest.

689
00:52:43,659 --> 00:52:45,947
The man, the myth, the legend!

690
00:52:46,161 --> 00:52:48,569
The one and only Billy the Kid!

691
00:53:07,182 --> 00:53:09,639
Seems like old times, huh, Billy-boy?

692
00:53:09,852 --> 00:53:10,967
Old times.

693
00:53:13,773 --> 00:53:16,098
Troy, man, I was thinking...

694
00:53:16,317 --> 00:53:19,651
...that maybe I could get
a job on campus...

695
00:53:19,863 --> 00:53:23,231
...with the students.
The fraternity, coaching. Anything.

696
00:53:23,491 --> 00:53:26,492
We could use somebody like you
around here.

697
00:53:26,744 --> 00:53:30,113
- Really?
- We need somebody to get us drugs.

698
00:53:30,582 --> 00:53:32,989
Come on, let's go play some ball.

699
00:53:42,552 --> 00:53:44,295
What is that, your rattle?

700
00:53:46,723 --> 00:53:47,968
Hi, babe.

701
00:53:51,436 --> 00:53:53,179
Remember Ray Slater?

702
00:53:54,564 --> 00:53:57,399
The guy I was going out with
before I met you?

703
00:53:58,067 --> 00:54:00,441
Well, he came by to see me yesterday.

704
00:54:01,405 --> 00:54:03,481
He still wants to marry me.

705
00:54:04,533 --> 00:54:07,238
He said he'd take care
of me and Melody.

706
00:54:09,371 --> 00:54:10,616
Don't give up on me.

707
00:54:10,873 --> 00:54:13,874
We could probably
still get an annulment.

708
00:54:17,630 --> 00:54:18,672
I'm gonna change.

709
00:54:19,798 --> 00:54:21,838
I'm gonna get the right job.

710
00:54:23,719 --> 00:54:26,388
Look, there's gonna be
no more drinking.

711
00:54:27,097 --> 00:54:28,140
And no more women.

712
00:54:38,567 --> 00:54:41,817
You're not gonna believe
how out of hand it's gonna be.

713
00:54:43,239 --> 00:54:47,319
I work out of my house.
You must be available 24 hours a day.

714
00:54:47,535 --> 00:54:49,991
Complete discretion and loyalty.

715
00:54:50,330 --> 00:54:51,528
$500 a week.

716
00:54:52,290 --> 00:54:53,666
I'm your man, Mr. Kim.

717
00:54:54,084 --> 00:54:58,710
I must be able to trust you with
my house, my car, my private affairs.

718
00:54:59,339 --> 00:55:01,960
Look no further, Mr. Kim.
I'm your man.

719
00:55:07,681 --> 00:55:09,673
That's her.
Okay, now open the door.

720
00:55:09,933 --> 00:55:11,807
Give me a break, will you?

721
00:55:12,018 --> 00:55:13,928
Get out and open the door.

722
00:55:14,145 --> 00:55:15,474
That's your job.

723
00:55:23,905 --> 00:55:25,186
What are you up to?

724
00:55:25,407 --> 00:55:29,072
I was handpicked as special attaché
to Mr. Kim Sung Ho.

725
00:55:29,327 --> 00:55:31,154
The famous Korean entrepreneur?

726
00:55:32,163 --> 00:55:33,658
What about medical school?

727
00:55:34,249 --> 00:55:38,412
Foolish pipe dream. I had to grab my
financial opportunities while I could.

728
00:55:38,795 --> 00:55:41,465
- It's all about money, right?
- Well, good luck.

729
00:55:41,716 --> 00:55:45,464
I'm throwing a little party
at Kim's house on Saturday night.

730
00:55:45,720 --> 00:55:47,297
I'd like to see you there.

731
00:55:47,555 --> 00:55:49,298
Thanks, Kirby. I'll try.

732
00:55:49,849 --> 00:55:50,892
Good deal.

733
00:55:53,227 --> 00:55:55,932
Did you see her face?
She'll be there.

734
00:55:56,898 --> 00:56:01,310
Mr. Kim finds out you're having a
party, and you'll be out in the street.

735
00:56:01,569 --> 00:56:03,396
No way.
He won't be home until Sunday.

736
00:56:03,654 --> 00:56:06,904
Besides, there's an extra $100
for you to keep your mouth shut.

737
00:56:17,418 --> 00:56:20,869
So does this mean that
you're officially engaged?

738
00:56:21,923 --> 00:56:22,923
Well...

739
00:56:23,021 --> 00:56:25,041
It means I'm officially
thinking about it.

740
00:56:25,259 --> 00:56:29,590
What is this? Didn't you think women
were always dying to get married?

741
00:56:29,806 --> 00:56:31,349
Not to me.

742
00:56:36,563 --> 00:56:38,022
Oh, God, look at this.

743
00:56:38,273 --> 00:56:39,471
You look great.

744
00:56:39,733 --> 00:56:42,687
Where's the beautiful doctor
we've been hearing about?

745
00:56:42,945 --> 00:56:44,487
- On her way.
- You are so wrong.

746
00:56:44,738 --> 00:56:49,032
College is a four-year delusion so
you don't have to deal with reality.

747
00:56:49,243 --> 00:56:52,493
You're lambs waiting to be
slaughtered, you undergrads.

748
00:56:52,746 --> 00:56:55,118
I take it medical school is now out.

749
00:56:55,374 --> 00:56:58,209
Absolutely.
I am now a student of life.

750
00:57:07,844 --> 00:57:10,632
This is my friend Howie Krantz.
Billy Hicks.

751
00:57:10,889 --> 00:57:11,932
Hi, Billy.

752
00:57:13,267 --> 00:57:15,306
We'll see you a little later.

753
00:57:17,980 --> 00:57:19,225
A friend of yours?

754
00:57:19,899 --> 00:57:25,024
Billy, I want you to know I'm not
gonna be getting you any more jobs.

755
00:57:25,780 --> 00:57:29,694
Al, you're so perfect.
Such a young god.

756
00:57:29,909 --> 00:57:31,617
You not only have the right stuff...

757
00:57:31,828 --> 00:57:34,449
...you have the right job
and the right hair.

758
00:57:34,956 --> 00:57:36,783
I, of course, have the wrong hair.

759
00:57:37,041 --> 00:57:40,742
Forrester said he wanted to know what
I'm looking for in this relationship.

760
00:57:40,962 --> 00:57:44,912
So I told him love, companionship
and the vice-presidency.

761
00:57:46,009 --> 00:57:48,879
Sounds like you have your boss
wrapped around your finger.

762
00:57:49,137 --> 00:57:52,422
I ever tell you what he likes me
to do with my finger?

763
00:57:52,724 --> 00:57:55,760
- How's your stepmother?
- Hanging on, the old witch.

764
00:57:56,019 --> 00:57:59,138
I found this place in California
called the Neptune Society.

765
00:57:59,397 --> 00:58:02,433
They just wrap her up and feed her
to the sharks for $500.

766
00:58:02,692 --> 00:58:04,435
I just have to ship her there.

767
00:58:04,694 --> 00:58:05,974
She's worse.

768
00:58:06,195 --> 00:58:08,484
It's gonna be a long night.

769
00:58:09,909 --> 00:58:13,075
Yeah, hi. By any chance,
did Dale Biberman...

770
00:58:13,329 --> 00:58:15,784
...get called in
on an emergency duty tonight?

771
00:58:19,710 --> 00:58:20,825
Okay. Thanks.

772
00:58:30,554 --> 00:58:32,547
- So how you doing?
- Fine.

773
00:58:35,267 --> 00:58:36,465
You still live at home?

774
00:58:36,852 --> 00:58:38,644
Yeah. How about you?

775
00:58:40,022 --> 00:58:41,647
Felicia hasn't kicked me out yet.

776
00:58:44,526 --> 00:58:45,902
Been playing your sax?

777
00:58:47,780 --> 00:58:49,488
I hocked it to pay the bills.

778
00:59:04,214 --> 00:59:08,377
Have you forgiven me for being
such a horse's ass?

779
00:59:09,052 --> 00:59:11,128
There's nothing to forgive.

780
00:59:12,305 --> 00:59:14,214
Actually, I should thank you.

781
00:59:14,891 --> 00:59:19,221
It helped me grow up a lot,
made me see how stupid I was being.

782
00:59:19,479 --> 00:59:21,187
Trusting a guy like me.

783
00:59:24,025 --> 00:59:25,650
You're very talented.

784
00:59:31,241 --> 00:59:33,198
So are you still...

785
00:59:33,451 --> 00:59:34,494
...a virgin?

786
00:59:37,914 --> 00:59:39,408
That's none of your business.

787
00:59:45,964 --> 00:59:50,093
I want you to make another emergency
breakthrough. Do you hear me?

788
00:59:50,344 --> 00:59:52,752
She won't release it?
Did you tell her who's calling?

789
00:59:53,014 --> 00:59:56,299
Did you tell her I was giving
a goddamn party for her?

790
01:00:01,272 --> 01:00:04,226
Make room.
The kid can't fly on one wing.

791
01:00:04,442 --> 01:00:05,722
Come to Mama.

792
01:00:06,819 --> 01:00:07,862
Quiet, please!

793
01:00:09,030 --> 01:00:10,275
Quiet, please!

794
01:00:11,157 --> 01:00:13,066
Quiet, please. Everyone!

795
01:00:14,410 --> 01:00:15,421
Thank you.

796
01:00:15,526 --> 01:00:17,820
Big Al has an announcement to make!

797
01:00:18,080 --> 01:00:20,488
Oh, well, now we're excited.

798
01:00:22,627 --> 01:00:24,169
On June 1...

799
01:00:24,754 --> 01:00:26,960
...Leslie Hunter will do me
the long...

800
01:00:27,173 --> 01:00:30,506
...long, long-awaited honor...

801
01:00:30,968 --> 01:00:32,379
...of becoming my bride.

802
01:00:34,222 --> 01:00:36,131
You're all invited!

803
01:00:36,432 --> 01:00:37,595
Thank you very much.

804
01:00:37,808 --> 01:00:40,347
Howie, let's make this
a double wedding.

805
01:00:48,695 --> 01:00:51,151
What's the matter with you?
Cut it out!

806
01:00:51,365 --> 01:00:54,200
We discussed this at home.
Now you completely discount me!

807
01:00:54,451 --> 01:00:58,152
I'm just trying to facilitate
the marriage process.

808
01:00:58,413 --> 01:01:00,121
You want marriage...

809
01:01:00,374 --> 01:01:03,908
...or a Christmas card with
the Newberrys in front of a fireplace?

810
01:01:04,169 --> 01:01:05,544
You're afraid to commit!

811
01:01:06,171 --> 01:01:07,998
No, I'm not afraid to commit.

812
01:01:08,924 --> 01:01:13,301
I have to have something for myself
first before I can share it with you.

813
01:01:13,554 --> 01:01:15,546
Will you just for once...

814
01:01:15,764 --> 01:01:19,892
...not use as the excuse for not
marrying me your goddamn career?

815
01:01:20,352 --> 01:01:22,677
Fine. All right then.

816
01:01:24,773 --> 01:01:26,813
I have a better excuse.

817
01:01:28,902 --> 01:01:32,272
What are we going to do about
your extracurricular love life?

818
01:01:34,951 --> 01:01:37,442
What extracurricular love life?

819
01:01:39,122 --> 01:01:40,830
Alec, come on.

820
01:01:46,045 --> 01:01:48,085
What did Kevin tell you?

821
01:01:50,800 --> 01:01:51,998
Nothing.

822
01:02:05,565 --> 01:02:07,024
What did you tell her?

823
01:02:07,233 --> 01:02:08,727
What did you tell her?

824
01:02:08,943 --> 01:02:10,485
He told me nothing.

825
01:02:11,029 --> 01:02:12,772
It was just a hunch...

826
01:02:13,406 --> 01:02:14,449
...until now.

827
01:02:26,128 --> 01:02:29,046
I want you out of
the apartment tonight.

828
01:02:36,722 --> 01:02:37,765
Are you okay?

829
01:02:38,015 --> 01:02:39,058
That's okay.

830
01:02:39,558 --> 01:02:42,512
It's cool. It ain't a party
till something gets broken.

831
01:02:43,562 --> 01:02:45,140
We're swinging now.

832
01:02:51,737 --> 01:02:53,979
Get off the phone and open this door!

833
01:02:54,198 --> 01:02:56,950
Are you the maniac that's been
trying to cut in on my line?

834
01:02:57,201 --> 01:02:58,363
I should have known.

835
01:02:58,827 --> 01:02:59,870
Where's Dale?

836
01:03:00,037 --> 01:03:01,697
She went skiing.

837
01:03:01,914 --> 01:03:03,657
What do you mean? Where?

838
01:03:04,041 --> 01:03:05,500
Why should I tell you?

839
01:03:05,751 --> 01:03:09,335
Because I'm not responsible
for what I'll do to you if you don't.

840
01:03:13,343 --> 01:03:16,095
Which one is yours?
I always forget.

841
01:03:16,513 --> 01:03:17,972
So do I.

842
01:03:20,225 --> 01:03:21,268
Let's get a drink.

843
01:03:22,644 --> 01:03:23,807
You wanna?

844
01:03:25,480 --> 01:03:27,639
Yeah, I do.
I've had a shit day.

845
01:03:27,857 --> 01:03:29,601
I've had a shit year.

846
01:03:30,360 --> 01:03:31,403
Where should we go?

847
01:03:32,862 --> 01:03:35,270
I think the bars are closed.

848
01:03:36,908 --> 01:03:38,106
Your place?

849
01:03:38,702 --> 01:03:39,702
Okay.

850
01:03:47,878 --> 01:03:50,962
You have really grown
into a fine-looking woman.

851
01:03:54,426 --> 01:03:56,299
I don't feel very fine-looking.

852
01:03:59,557 --> 01:04:02,807
There's something I've been
wanting to ask you all night.

853
01:04:05,771 --> 01:04:08,262
What you got on underneath that skirt?

854
01:04:09,859 --> 01:04:11,139
You should know.

855
01:04:27,793 --> 01:04:28,836
Okay, Billy.

856
01:04:31,422 --> 01:04:33,747
Come on.
Don't save it for your boss.

857
01:04:37,011 --> 01:04:38,470
Can you keep a secret?

858
01:04:38,721 --> 01:04:40,844
I have kept many secrets.

859
01:04:41,474 --> 01:04:43,383
Billy, enough.

860
01:04:43,643 --> 01:04:45,018
Enough!

861
01:04:45,436 --> 01:04:46,479
Says who?

862
01:04:47,521 --> 01:04:48,564
I say.

863
01:04:48,773 --> 01:04:50,897
- Oh, you say.
- That's right.

864
01:04:51,151 --> 01:04:54,105
You wouldn't have so much
to say with me in your mouth.

865
01:04:54,363 --> 01:04:56,651
I'm serious. I said no!

866
01:05:08,669 --> 01:05:10,044
Give me my keys.

867
01:05:12,965 --> 01:05:14,163
Come and get them.

868
01:05:14,967 --> 01:05:16,959
You shit, give me my keys!

869
01:05:17,219 --> 01:05:19,971
- Come here.
- No! Give me my keys!

870
01:05:21,098 --> 01:05:22,140
Come on!

871
01:05:22,933 --> 01:05:24,427
I'm getting a boner now!

872
01:05:28,605 --> 01:05:30,016
- Yes.
- Give me the keys!

873
01:05:30,274 --> 01:05:31,316
I love it!

874
01:05:33,360 --> 01:05:35,103
Give me my keys.

875
01:05:35,696 --> 01:05:38,400
Oh, watch the crease.
Watch the crease.

876
01:05:38,949 --> 01:05:40,444
I needed a friend tonight.

877
01:05:41,953 --> 01:05:45,701
Get back in the Jeep and assume
the missionary position.

878
01:05:48,793 --> 01:05:50,371
You break my heart.

879
01:05:54,215 --> 01:05:56,920
Then again, you break
everyone's heart.

880
01:06:08,855 --> 01:06:10,847
Hey, Jules, I'm sorry!

881
01:06:24,621 --> 01:06:25,735
I'm sorry.

882
01:07:11,585 --> 01:07:13,625
- Who is it?
- Is Dale Biberman there?

883
01:07:13,837 --> 01:07:15,711
- Who wants to know?
- Kirby Keager!

884
01:07:17,967 --> 01:07:20,032
- Who the hell are you?
- Who the hell are you?

885
01:07:20,595 --> 01:07:22,920
Kirby! What are you doing here?

886
01:07:29,646 --> 01:07:30,689
Who is that?

887
01:07:30,814 --> 01:07:33,601
- Stop him, Guy. Will you?
- I'm buck naked.

888
01:07:33,817 --> 01:07:36,142
Kirby, stop! Come inside!

889
01:07:40,782 --> 01:07:42,573
This guy is crazy.

890
01:07:52,043 --> 01:07:55,329
You've got no snow tires or chains.
You've got no traction.

891
01:07:55,589 --> 01:07:57,047
Kirby, please.

892
01:07:57,507 --> 01:07:59,879
You won't get out of here tonight.
Come inside.

893
01:08:00,552 --> 01:08:01,714
I'll stay in the car!

894
01:08:02,721 --> 01:08:05,722
- He wants to stay in the car.
- He'll freeze.

895
01:08:06,766 --> 01:08:08,177
People have died out here.

896
01:08:08,643 --> 01:08:12,309
So just leave me alone!
Get away from me and leave me alone!

897
01:08:15,526 --> 01:08:16,985
Please come inside.

898
01:08:28,039 --> 01:08:29,782
I haven't been here for a while.

899
01:08:29,999 --> 01:08:33,083
It's still the same.
Small and ugly.

900
01:08:33,586 --> 01:08:36,919
But then again,
it is small and ugly. Here.

901
01:08:37,131 --> 01:08:39,966
You sure you don't want to go
to some nice ladylike hotel?

902
01:08:40,218 --> 01:08:41,463
I'll be fine here.

903
01:08:41,719 --> 01:08:44,839
As long as I'm not putting you
or Kirbo to any trouble.

904
01:08:45,097 --> 01:08:46,426
No, it's fine.

905
01:08:48,100 --> 01:08:49,595
Is that a coffin?

906
01:08:49,852 --> 01:08:52,723
I thought girls would think
it was sexy.

907
01:08:52,980 --> 01:08:54,143
And do they?

908
01:08:55,233 --> 01:08:56,857
How would I know?

909
01:08:57,526 --> 01:09:01,857
You better not let Jules see it.
She'll steal it for her stepmother.

910
01:09:02,115 --> 01:09:03,740
You wanna sit down there?

911
01:09:07,913 --> 01:09:09,787
When did you win
these writing awards?

912
01:09:10,040 --> 01:09:13,623
Oh, never. They're more effect
to impress young ladies.

913
01:09:14,836 --> 01:09:16,663
I did win something.

914
01:09:17,506 --> 01:09:18,965
In eighth grade...

915
01:09:19,466 --> 01:09:21,126
...I won Best Haiku Poem.

916
01:09:21,343 --> 01:09:23,549
I beat out David Autry.

917
01:09:23,971 --> 01:09:25,631
Quite a thrill.

918
01:09:26,515 --> 01:09:30,928
So I've wandered into a real
woman trap here, haven't I?

919
01:09:33,355 --> 01:09:36,605
Only you're the first woman,
and I blew all my props already.

920
01:09:36,858 --> 01:09:38,566
You want some brandy?

921
01:09:39,278 --> 01:09:40,278
Good.

922
01:10:10,351 --> 01:10:12,143
Am I part of your props?

923
01:10:26,200 --> 01:10:28,407
Your clothes should be dry
in a few hours.

924
01:10:28,620 --> 01:10:31,407
- He's a doctor, isn't he?
- And here are some pajamas.

925
01:10:33,499 --> 01:10:35,373
You expect me to wear his pajamas?

926
01:10:37,003 --> 01:10:39,043
We'll talk in the morning.

927
01:11:02,988 --> 01:11:05,064
Alec was the first.

928
01:11:05,282 --> 01:11:06,563
You know?

929
01:11:07,076 --> 01:11:11,572
I mean, there were other guys
for me in high school.

930
01:11:11,789 --> 01:11:12,789
Boys.

931
01:11:16,126 --> 01:11:19,293
Alec was the first love of my life.

932
01:11:22,508 --> 01:11:26,588
I sometimes think if we hadn't
ended up in the same dorm...

933
01:11:28,055 --> 01:11:30,428
...I would have just met someone else.

934
01:11:30,642 --> 01:11:31,685
So would he.

935
01:11:36,815 --> 01:11:40,148
Alec had the luck of geography, right?

936
01:11:43,363 --> 01:11:46,115
Whatever we say about Alec
we'll regret tomorrow.

937
01:11:47,951 --> 01:11:48,994
Tell me something.

938
01:11:51,621 --> 01:11:54,871
What do you think about
our relationship as an outsider?

939
01:11:55,125 --> 01:11:57,283
I want you to be honest.

940
01:11:57,669 --> 01:11:59,958
- Really.
- You want me to be honest?

941
01:12:00,171 --> 01:12:01,630
I don't know.

942
01:12:09,848 --> 01:12:11,472
Dangerous question.

943
01:12:11,725 --> 01:12:16,221
Well, I think I hang around you guys
so much, personally...

944
01:12:17,981 --> 01:12:20,603
...because, well,
you're all I think about.

945
01:12:23,321 --> 01:12:24,321
Me?

946
01:12:29,869 --> 01:12:33,736
And I think that the reason
I'm not interested in other women...

947
01:12:33,956 --> 01:12:36,578
...and why I haven't had sex
in so long...

948
01:12:38,419 --> 01:12:40,412
...is because I am...

949
01:12:41,339 --> 01:12:43,746
...desperately, completely...

950
01:12:45,009 --> 01:12:46,800
...in love with you.

951
01:13:00,024 --> 01:13:02,729
We won't even remember this
tomorrow, huh?

952
01:13:08,783 --> 01:13:10,492
It is tomorrow.

953
01:13:19,294 --> 01:13:22,414
Oh, I love you!
I've always loved you!

954
01:13:23,465 --> 01:13:26,300
- Oh, I'm sorry!
- No, no, I love it! I love it!

955
01:13:27,010 --> 01:13:29,632
- What are you doing?
- Nothing. Where is this thing?

956
01:13:29,888 --> 01:13:32,213
- It's in the front.
- Okay. Wait.

957
01:14:14,976 --> 01:14:17,182
I broke your shower!

958
01:14:41,669 --> 01:14:43,745
I gave him a key.

959
01:14:46,049 --> 01:14:48,670
I'm only gonna ask you this once.

960
01:14:52,932 --> 01:14:56,217
Did you tell Leslie
about my screwing around?

961
01:14:57,102 --> 01:14:58,102
No.

962
01:15:00,522 --> 01:15:02,349
I believe you.

963
01:15:03,150 --> 01:15:08,061
I want you to know that I believe you,
and I'm sorry I hit you.

964
01:15:16,914 --> 01:15:18,705
I don't think...

965
01:15:21,502 --> 01:15:26,579
...that I am ever gonna be able
to get Leslie back.

966
01:15:29,760 --> 01:15:30,875
Buddy...

967
01:15:31,136 --> 01:15:32,928
...I kind of got some company.

968
01:15:33,180 --> 01:15:34,888
Oh, Jesus.

969
01:15:36,684 --> 01:15:38,510
- I'm sorry.
- It's all right.

970
01:15:39,437 --> 01:15:42,189
- I never thought...
- I'll call you tomorrow.

971
01:15:42,399 --> 01:15:45,400
- I never thought it was possible.
- Let me call you.

972
01:15:45,610 --> 01:15:47,899
- Hey, just a minute. Tell me.
- What?

973
01:15:48,780 --> 01:15:52,694
- Is it the fat chick from the party?
- Let me call you later.

974
01:15:53,243 --> 01:15:54,986
Come on. Come on.

975
01:15:56,788 --> 01:15:59,908
I have to know.
Is it the fat chick from the party?

976
01:16:05,171 --> 01:16:07,045
It's not the fat chick.

977
01:16:14,222 --> 01:16:16,215
No way that this is happening.

978
01:16:18,435 --> 01:16:20,344
It happened.

979
01:16:23,189 --> 01:16:24,232
- Alec...
- Shut up!

980
01:17:12,657 --> 01:17:15,278
Where is Kirby Keager?

981
01:17:19,748 --> 01:17:21,705
He took my new car.

982
01:17:27,422 --> 01:17:28,833
It started!

983
01:17:29,675 --> 01:17:33,209
You better hurry up before
it starts snowing again.

984
01:17:43,313 --> 01:17:45,270
So drive carefully.

985
01:17:46,024 --> 01:17:47,566
Nice meeting you.

986
01:17:51,029 --> 01:17:55,905
Honey, I'll get the camera,
and we'll take a photo of you guys.

987
01:17:58,495 --> 01:18:02,623
I don't really know you that well,
but you seem like a fine person.

988
01:18:02,874 --> 01:18:06,041
And I want you to know
I'm flattered by all this.

989
01:18:08,255 --> 01:18:10,545
Deep down, I'm sure for a long time...

990
01:18:10,800 --> 01:18:13,505
...I'll wonder if maybe
this isn't my loss.

991
01:18:56,512 --> 01:18:57,712
Smile.

992
01:19:01,727 --> 01:19:03,102
There you are.

993
01:19:10,361 --> 01:19:11,641
Later, dude.

994
01:20:08,003 --> 01:20:09,413
Hi, Daddy.

995
01:20:14,217 --> 01:20:16,293
This is some neighborhood.

996
01:20:16,928 --> 01:20:18,802
Did you get your car fixed?

997
01:20:19,222 --> 01:20:21,844
I got a personal letter
from Lee Iacocca.

998
01:20:23,602 --> 01:20:26,271
I did.
They fixed everything for nothing.

999
01:20:26,730 --> 01:20:27,730
Good.

1000
01:20:28,440 --> 01:20:30,064
But I can't keep it.

1001
01:20:31,192 --> 01:20:35,237
I can't drive that car and work
with people who can't afford to eat.

1002
01:20:35,906 --> 01:20:39,026
Keep the car.
You and Howie will need it.

1003
01:20:40,870 --> 01:20:42,150
Well, Daddy...

1004
01:20:43,497 --> 01:20:45,739
...I'm giving Howie back too.

1005
01:20:47,960 --> 01:20:49,585
I don't love Howie.

1006
01:20:50,379 --> 01:20:51,755
Well, we learn to love.

1007
01:20:51,964 --> 01:20:54,835
I mean, there's marriage
and there's family...

1008
01:20:55,927 --> 01:20:57,421
...and the family business.

1009
01:20:57,678 --> 01:20:59,671
That's what's important.

1010
01:21:00,389 --> 01:21:02,596
I have my own job.

1011
01:21:03,476 --> 01:21:06,227
And I want to get my own apartment.

1012
01:21:06,562 --> 01:21:09,053
But you can keep your job
until you're pregnant.

1013
01:21:10,900 --> 01:21:14,020
I mean, Howie's a fine boy...

1014
01:21:14,570 --> 01:21:17,192
...and I don't think
you need your own apartment.

1015
01:21:18,491 --> 01:21:21,408
- Do you ever hear me?
- Well, I do.

1016
01:21:21,619 --> 01:21:23,161
I don't love Howie.

1017
01:21:25,748 --> 01:21:27,242
I don't love him.

1018
01:21:28,752 --> 01:21:29,831
I love Billy.

1019
01:21:30,629 --> 01:21:31,909
Billy from the roof?

1020
01:22:17,342 --> 01:22:20,380
I took off work because
I thought you wouldn't be here.

1021
01:22:20,597 --> 01:22:21,676
I'm sick.

1022
01:22:23,474 --> 01:22:24,474
What's wrong?

1023
01:22:24,572 --> 01:22:26,225
Just sickness.

1024
01:22:35,028 --> 01:22:36,937
You can't have the Pretenders album.

1025
01:22:37,572 --> 01:22:39,114
- That's mine.
- I bought it.

1026
01:22:39,324 --> 01:22:40,366
You did not!

1027
01:22:43,077 --> 01:22:45,403
You can have all the Billy Joels.

1028
01:22:47,081 --> 01:22:48,244
Except <i>The Stranger.</i>

1029
01:22:49,584 --> 01:22:51,458
I'm taking <i>Thriller...</i>

1030
01:22:51,753 --> 01:22:53,544
...and Mahler's Ninth.

1031
01:22:55,465 --> 01:22:57,504
Kevin is so fond of Mahler.

1032
01:22:59,260 --> 01:23:00,754
I moved in with Jules.

1033
01:23:01,012 --> 01:23:02,672
Oh, how nice.

1034
01:23:03,139 --> 01:23:04,598
Roomies again.

1035
01:23:08,102 --> 01:23:10,179
No Springsteen leaves this house!

1036
01:23:11,982 --> 01:23:14,438
You can have all the Carly Simons.

1037
01:23:14,693 --> 01:23:17,564
You got me those for Valentine's Day.
Remember Valentine's?

1038
01:23:18,239 --> 01:23:20,776
You ran out on this relationship.
Take the consequences.

1039
01:23:21,033 --> 01:23:23,239
I didn't run out on anything.
You ran out.

1040
01:23:23,494 --> 01:23:25,736
- You fucked Kevin!
- You fucked many!

1041
01:23:26,038 --> 01:23:27,698
Nameless, faceless many!

1042
01:23:30,000 --> 01:23:32,076
I feel much better now.

1043
01:23:32,294 --> 01:23:33,457
Thanks.

1044
01:23:43,639 --> 01:23:45,014
You're not taking The Police...

1045
01:23:45,557 --> 01:23:48,095
Anyway, I didn't just fuck Kevin!

1046
01:23:48,352 --> 01:23:51,555
I was confused and angry,
and I care about him deeply.

1047
01:23:51,814 --> 01:23:54,684
Get your clothes,
give me the keys and get out!

1048
01:23:56,777 --> 01:23:57,777
Now!

1049
01:24:02,325 --> 01:24:04,781
I can't believe
this is happening to us.

1050
01:24:13,169 --> 01:24:15,292
Wasted love!

1051
01:24:23,096 --> 01:24:25,504
God, I just wish
I could get it back!

1052
01:24:43,033 --> 01:24:44,075
You did it!

1053
01:24:46,369 --> 01:24:49,490
I think I'll probably
be back doing obits tomorrow.

1054
01:24:49,707 --> 01:24:52,661
You're gonna attract
a lot of attention with this.

1055
01:24:52,877 --> 01:24:53,877
You think?

1056
01:24:53,975 --> 01:24:55,544
It's because of you.

1057
01:24:55,755 --> 01:24:57,831
I couldn't write anything till you.

1058
01:24:58,883 --> 01:24:59,883
What?

1059
01:25:02,219 --> 01:25:04,212
Don't you guys ever use a bed?

1060
01:25:06,057 --> 01:25:07,966
I'm gonna show Jules your piece.

1061
01:25:09,894 --> 01:25:11,305
Wait, wait, wait.

1062
01:25:11,562 --> 01:25:12,562
What?

1063
01:25:36,504 --> 01:25:38,128
Kevin has his first byline.

1064
01:25:38,381 --> 01:25:40,955
Really? That's great.
Let me see.

1065
01:25:45,389 --> 01:25:46,669
"Housing in Maryland"?

1066
01:25:46,932 --> 01:25:49,339
- The other piece.
- "The Meaning of Life."

1067
01:25:49,559 --> 01:25:53,509
Forrester's waiting. Did the hospital
call? Did my step-monster die?

1068
01:25:53,730 --> 01:25:55,889
- He's waiting.
- I want to meet him.

1069
01:25:56,149 --> 01:25:58,225
Not now, but I'll have him wave up.

1070
01:26:01,905 --> 01:26:05,405
- She's out of control.
- Since the day we met her.

1071
01:26:10,247 --> 01:26:11,290
Who is that?

1072
01:26:11,456 --> 01:26:13,532
Jules' boss and lover.

1073
01:26:19,172 --> 01:26:21,498
International banking
has gotten sexier.

1074
01:26:21,758 --> 01:26:25,459
Speaking of which, not to get ahead
of myself, but I was thinking...

1075
01:26:25,721 --> 01:26:27,713
...maybe we'd get a place together.

1076
01:26:27,931 --> 01:26:28,931
What?

1077
01:26:29,048 --> 01:26:31,887
I know it's fast,
but I also know I love you.

1078
01:26:34,564 --> 01:26:36,272
Sex isn't love.

1079
01:26:42,780 --> 01:26:43,823
What's that mean?

1080
01:26:43,990 --> 01:26:47,988
That means that you were sitting there
with all these feelings...

1081
01:26:48,244 --> 01:26:52,787
...incredible feelings, tied up
in a box with my pictures.

1082
01:26:52,999 --> 01:26:55,668
And I needed to break away from Alec.

1083
01:27:08,806 --> 01:27:10,680
I'm not proud of my behavior.

1084
01:27:13,665 --> 01:27:15,988
- Hang up.
<i>- Who's that?</i>

1085
01:27:16,522 --> 01:27:18,017
That's not Kevin, is it?

1086
01:27:19,109 --> 01:27:21,565
<i>You're not with Kevin
playing my records?</i>

1087
01:27:21,820 --> 01:27:22,863
Stop it, please.

1088
01:27:23,030 --> 01:27:26,316
- Tell him we're moving in together.
- We are not!

1089
01:27:26,825 --> 01:27:30,029
So the two of you are
moving in together.

1090
01:27:37,628 --> 01:27:41,328
I wish everything could be like
it was, all of us friends.

1091
01:27:41,966 --> 01:27:44,254
I don't want to be friends.

1092
01:27:46,637 --> 01:27:48,012
I didn't mean that.

1093
01:27:48,264 --> 01:27:49,841
I mean, it was an accident.

1094
01:27:50,557 --> 01:27:53,345
I'm beginning to think
there aren't any accidents.

1095
01:27:57,022 --> 01:27:59,774
And I would really like it...

1096
01:27:59,984 --> 01:28:02,060
...if you would just leave.

1097
01:28:02,861 --> 01:28:03,861
Okay?

1098
01:28:12,038 --> 01:28:13,081
Great.

1099
01:28:16,835 --> 01:28:18,459
You were right all along.

1100
01:28:18,712 --> 01:28:20,751
- Love sucks.
- Yep.

1101
01:28:23,133 --> 01:28:25,802
So you gonna get the old job back?

1102
01:28:26,052 --> 01:28:27,381
No way.

1103
01:28:28,346 --> 01:28:31,929
Once I'm back in school,
I'll work part-time for a law firm.

1104
01:28:32,183 --> 01:28:35,137
Did you know there are
as many students in law school...

1105
01:28:35,353 --> 01:28:36,764
...as there are lawyers?

1106
01:28:36,980 --> 01:28:38,308
Sounds familiar.

1107
01:28:46,197 --> 01:28:48,570
I always thought
we'd be friends forever.

1108
01:28:50,201 --> 01:28:54,828
Yeah, well, forever got a lot
shorter suddenly, didn't it?

1109
01:29:01,380 --> 01:29:04,334
Okay, call Mary Dusit at that number.

1110
01:29:04,842 --> 01:29:06,087
Yeah, I'll call.

1111
01:29:13,684 --> 01:29:15,095
I'll call you back.

1112
01:29:23,486 --> 01:29:25,609
I'm sorry to bother you here.

1113
01:29:25,863 --> 01:29:28,188
Did you forget one of your albums?

1114
01:29:28,407 --> 01:29:30,067
It's Jules.

1115
01:29:30,952 --> 01:29:33,075
After she left for work
this morning...

1116
01:29:33,329 --> 01:29:36,164
...some finance company came
and took everything.

1117
01:29:36,415 --> 01:29:39,701
I couldn't reach her,
so I went over to her office.

1118
01:29:39,961 --> 01:29:42,167
She's been pretending
to go to work...

1119
01:29:42,421 --> 01:29:45,126
...telling me she's having
an affair with her boss.

1120
01:29:45,341 --> 01:29:47,630
He fired her three weeks ago.

1121
01:29:48,804 --> 01:29:50,843
I confronted her,
and she denied everything.

1122
01:29:51,098 --> 01:29:55,807
But then she went crazy. And now
she's locked herself in the apartment.

1123
01:29:58,939 --> 01:30:01,145
Please, I need your help.

1124
01:30:09,950 --> 01:30:11,942
Hi, Jules. Open the door.

1125
01:30:13,954 --> 01:30:15,828
- Open the door.
- She's in there.

1126
01:30:16,039 --> 01:30:17,783
She's got it deadbolted.

1127
01:30:24,590 --> 01:30:27,045
- What's he doing here?
- I called him.

1128
01:30:27,301 --> 01:30:29,340
Did you call all your lovers?

1129
01:30:29,595 --> 01:30:32,216
Will your high-school prom date
be joining us too?

1130
01:30:33,223 --> 01:30:36,177
- What's happening with Jules?
- She's bolted the door.

1131
01:30:36,560 --> 01:30:38,054
The fire escape!

1132
01:30:43,985 --> 01:30:45,028
Open up!

1133
01:30:56,289 --> 01:30:57,867
What are you doing?

1134
01:30:58,374 --> 01:31:00,533
- You'll freeze.
- That's the idea.

1135
01:31:00,752 --> 01:31:02,412
Jules, honey, it's me!

1136
01:31:03,379 --> 01:31:05,171
You're really scaring me now!

1137
01:31:05,381 --> 01:31:07,789
The country's falling apart,
but these bars are perfect.

1138
01:31:08,051 --> 01:31:10,755
- We need a hacksaw.
- Or an experienced thief.

1139
01:31:10,970 --> 01:31:12,085
I'll find Billy.

1140
01:31:12,347 --> 01:31:13,675
I was kidding.

1141
01:31:13,890 --> 01:31:17,093
He's working at the Amoco station.
I'll see what he's got.

1142
01:31:17,352 --> 01:31:20,000
- He's around the corner.
- Billy's working at a gas station?

1143
01:31:20,104 --> 01:31:21,599
He needed the money.

1144
01:31:24,067 --> 01:31:25,109
You little shit!

1145
01:31:31,533 --> 01:31:32,533
Here!

1146
01:31:32,952 --> 01:31:33,994
What's happening?

1147
01:31:34,119 --> 01:31:36,693
- How do you feel now, best friend?
- My notes!

1148
01:31:37,206 --> 01:31:39,531
You won't be needing
your notes anymore.

1149
01:31:40,084 --> 01:31:41,993
Stop it!
You'll kill him!

1150
01:31:42,253 --> 01:31:45,040
This won't solve anything.
Think of your career.

1151
01:31:45,297 --> 01:31:48,168
- Stop it!
- After all I've done for you!

1152
01:31:48,425 --> 01:31:50,632
I've done a lot for you too.
Pull me up.

1153
01:31:51,095 --> 01:31:52,553
What you did for me, you shit...

1154
01:31:53,305 --> 01:31:56,176
...was steal the woman
that I was gonna marry!

1155
01:31:59,603 --> 01:32:01,347
Kirbo, you need any help?

1156
01:32:01,563 --> 01:32:04,268
- Quick!
- Help! Alec, pull him up!

1157
01:32:05,943 --> 01:32:07,318
Looks pretty out of hand.

1158
01:32:07,569 --> 01:32:10,523
Stop it! Do you think this
is helping Jules?

1159
01:32:10,739 --> 01:32:11,782
I love her, man.

1160
01:32:12,700 --> 01:32:13,980
Give me a hand!

1161
01:32:16,370 --> 01:32:17,533
I got it! I got it!

1162
01:32:25,630 --> 01:32:27,338
- You all right?
- Super.

1163
01:32:27,549 --> 01:32:28,663
I'm going upstairs.

1164
01:32:29,050 --> 01:32:32,170
Somebody give me a hand!
Come on!

1165
01:32:32,387 --> 01:32:33,430
Oh, my God!

1166
01:32:34,055 --> 01:32:36,297
Honey, open the door.
It's so cold.

1167
01:32:36,516 --> 01:32:38,592
Noble how you ran up
to save your lover.

1168
01:32:38,852 --> 01:32:40,394
He's not my lover.

1169
01:32:40,645 --> 01:32:42,602
- Jules, listen...
- Bullshit!

1170
01:32:42,856 --> 01:32:46,521
I've never lied to you since the day
I met you, you cocky shithead!

1171
01:32:47,527 --> 01:32:49,152
- Alec!
- We all love you.

1172
01:32:49,404 --> 01:32:50,404
Help!

1173
01:32:54,326 --> 01:32:55,784
Open this goddamn door!

1174
01:32:57,996 --> 01:32:59,538
- Blowtorch?
- Give it to me.

1175
01:32:59,748 --> 01:33:02,784
- Do not hand that man a blowtorch.
- Put these on.

1176
01:33:06,046 --> 01:33:07,088
Open the door!

1177
01:33:07,631 --> 01:33:11,083
Did you hear me?
Open the door, or I'll bust it down!

1178
01:33:14,972 --> 01:33:16,597
I'm coming through this door!

1179
01:33:16,849 --> 01:33:19,470
You know I'm crazy enough to do it!

1180
01:33:21,562 --> 01:33:22,605
What's happening?

1181
01:33:33,783 --> 01:33:34,981
I'm going in.

1182
01:33:40,039 --> 01:33:41,082
Hi, Billy.

1183
01:33:51,050 --> 01:33:53,256
What's the big deal here?

1184
01:33:53,469 --> 01:33:54,963
You lost a job?

1185
01:33:55,221 --> 01:33:58,673
I've lost 20 of them since graduation.

1186
01:33:59,268 --> 01:34:00,892
Plus a wife and kid.

1187
01:34:01,561 --> 01:34:05,559
In a new development, a handful
of hair in the shower this morning.

1188
01:34:06,400 --> 01:34:07,858
That's better.

1189
01:34:08,694 --> 01:34:09,736
You know...

1190
01:34:10,529 --> 01:34:14,313
...this smells to me like
a little bit of self-created drama.

1191
01:34:14,700 --> 01:34:17,866
I should know. I've been
starring in a few of my own.

1192
01:34:19,955 --> 01:34:23,703
Do you know what I've been doing
every day since I got fired?

1193
01:34:24,585 --> 01:34:25,585
What?

1194
01:34:25,752 --> 01:34:29,417
I've been sitting in the hospital
with my step-monster.

1195
01:34:31,925 --> 01:34:35,175
We've had the best talks
we've ever had.

1196
01:34:36,638 --> 01:34:40,802
Of course, she's in a coma,
which really pisses me off.

1197
01:34:42,644 --> 01:34:44,886
Because all that time...

1198
01:34:47,149 --> 01:34:48,644
...I just waited...

1199
01:34:48,901 --> 01:34:52,270
...for one word from that woman...

1200
01:34:53,990 --> 01:34:58,237
...about why my father
hates me so much.

1201
01:35:12,175 --> 01:35:13,966
Jules, you know...

1202
01:35:15,470 --> 01:35:17,130
...honey, this isn't real.

1203
01:35:17,555 --> 01:35:18,966
You know what it is?

1204
01:35:19,182 --> 01:35:20,593
It's St. Elmo's fire.

1205
01:35:20,934 --> 01:35:25,014
The electric flashes of light that
appear in dark skies out of nowhere.

1206
01:35:30,818 --> 01:35:34,733
Sailors would guide entire journeys
by it. But there was no fire.

1207
01:35:34,989 --> 01:35:37,824
There wasn't even a St. Elmo.
They made it up...

1208
01:35:38,786 --> 01:35:42,783
...because they needed it
to keep going when things got tough.

1209
01:35:43,040 --> 01:35:45,448
Just like you're making up
all of this.

1210
01:35:49,838 --> 01:35:51,914
We're all going through this.

1211
01:35:54,510 --> 01:35:56,716
It's our time on the edge.

1212
01:35:59,056 --> 01:36:01,725
I'm just so tired.

1213
01:36:04,186 --> 01:36:08,184
I never thought I'd be so tired at 22.

1214
01:36:12,569 --> 01:36:15,689
I just don't even know
who to be anymore.

1215
01:36:15,948 --> 01:36:17,572
Join the club.

1216
01:36:22,037 --> 01:36:26,533
No one was buying this together-
woman-of-the-eighties stuff anyway.

1217
01:36:34,759 --> 01:36:39,256
And all this time I was afraid
you'd find out I wasn't fabulous.

1218
01:36:41,558 --> 01:36:43,017
It's cool.

1219
01:36:44,477 --> 01:36:48,226
All this time I was afraid
you'd find out I was irresponsible.

1220
01:36:54,112 --> 01:36:55,357
They're laughing.

1221
01:36:55,572 --> 01:36:57,446
The hysterical laughter heard...

1222
01:36:57,699 --> 01:37:00,320
...most frequently
from schizophrenic paranoids.

1223
01:37:00,827 --> 01:37:04,196
Set up my drafting table
so we can have coffee on it.

1224
01:37:07,918 --> 01:37:09,910
- Oh, baby.
- I love you.

1225
01:37:16,468 --> 01:37:18,260
And then what happened?

1226
01:37:18,471 --> 01:37:19,585
That was it.

1227
01:37:19,805 --> 01:37:23,886
We came out of the bedroom,
and then I shot her.

1228
01:37:24,393 --> 01:37:26,386
No, you did not.

1229
01:37:26,646 --> 01:37:28,104
You saved her life.

1230
01:37:28,356 --> 01:37:30,644
Oh, let's not be dramatic.

1231
01:37:31,609 --> 01:37:34,100
So when did you get so sane?

1232
01:37:34,612 --> 01:37:38,063
When I realized how insane I'd been
trying to be like Alec.

1233
01:37:38,699 --> 01:37:41,190
I'm not part of this
after-college life.

1234
01:37:41,452 --> 01:37:43,445
Careers. Marriage.

1235
01:37:44,789 --> 01:37:46,865
Felicia and Melody'll be
better off without me.

1236
01:37:47,083 --> 01:37:49,408
Did she get remarried already?

1237
01:37:50,253 --> 01:37:51,960
In about three or four weeks.

1238
01:37:55,591 --> 01:37:57,880
I was thinking of hanging
around and being...

1239
01:37:58,135 --> 01:38:00,626
...one of those
I’ll-see-you-on-the-weekend dads.

1240
01:38:00,888 --> 01:38:02,881
That's not what Melody needs.

1241
01:38:03,599 --> 01:38:05,924
Besides, it'd confuse everybody.

1242
01:38:11,316 --> 01:38:12,645
You don't have to.

1243
01:38:12,859 --> 01:38:15,433
Come on, it's not even half of
what I owe you.

1244
01:38:16,738 --> 01:38:19,194
I'll get you the rest
once I get settled in New York.

1245
01:38:19,449 --> 01:38:23,661
If I can find someone who's
fool enough to let me play my sax.

1246
01:38:23,912 --> 01:38:26,071
Oh, they'll let you play.
You're really...

1247
01:38:26,331 --> 01:38:27,374
Talented, Billy.

1248
01:38:28,625 --> 01:38:30,084
You are.

1249
01:38:37,801 --> 01:38:39,628
This place is great.

1250
01:38:45,934 --> 01:38:47,927
You wanna know what's great?

1251
01:38:48,770 --> 01:38:50,644
Last night, I woke up...

1252
01:38:50,856 --> 01:38:53,940
...to make myself a peanut
butter and jelly sandwich.

1253
01:38:55,694 --> 01:39:00,487
And you know, it was my kitchen,
and it was my refrigerator...

1254
01:39:00,950 --> 01:39:02,859
...and it was my apartment...

1255
01:39:03,119 --> 01:39:05,871
...and it was the best peanut butter
and jelly sandwich...

1256
01:39:06,122 --> 01:39:08,115
...I've had in my entire life.

1257
01:39:32,231 --> 01:39:33,809
You're really going, huh?

1258
01:39:39,948 --> 01:39:41,146
You still a virgin?

1259
01:39:44,035 --> 01:39:47,783
Why is my sexual status
so important to you?

1260
01:40:11,814 --> 01:40:16,559
Have I abused our relationship
too much...

1261
01:40:18,821 --> 01:40:22,605
...or could I be so bold as to ask you
for a going-away present?

1262
01:40:48,935 --> 01:40:50,180
Oh, God.

1263
01:41:26,806 --> 01:41:27,849
Good luck.

1264
01:41:34,357 --> 01:41:36,017
You're gonna be okay.

1265
01:41:36,484 --> 01:41:38,108
So are you.

1266
01:41:44,617 --> 01:41:47,072
Forgive me for not getting intimate.

1267
01:41:47,536 --> 01:41:49,196
Here. Long ride.

1268
01:41:50,456 --> 01:41:52,532
- You shouldn't have.
- I know.

1269
01:41:55,086 --> 01:41:57,458
You're beautiful. Never shave.

1270
01:41:57,672 --> 01:42:00,210
Don't go changing to please me.

1271
01:42:05,263 --> 01:42:06,263
Bye.

1272
01:42:07,056 --> 01:42:08,764
Don't let her go.

1273
01:42:15,815 --> 01:42:17,606
Go get out of hand.

1274
01:42:17,817 --> 01:42:19,478
I'm gonna keep in touch.

1275
01:42:19,695 --> 01:42:21,272
No, you will not.

1276
01:42:57,524 --> 01:43:00,560
<i>I can't remember
who met who first...</i>

1277
01:43:00,902 --> 01:43:03,607
<i>... or who fell in love
with who first.</i>

1278
01:43:04,031 --> 01:43:08,658
<i>All I can remember is
the seven of us always together.</i>

1279
01:43:08,911 --> 01:43:11,153
<i>And I've made a decision.</i>

1280
01:43:13,166 --> 01:43:14,446
I think...

1281
01:43:14,751 --> 01:43:17,586
...I have to be
by myself for a while.

1282
01:43:20,089 --> 01:43:22,580
I thought I was
the miracle of your life.

1283
01:43:23,927 --> 01:43:25,586
I thought I was the miracle.

1284
01:43:25,803 --> 01:43:27,761
I love you both.

1285
01:43:28,640 --> 01:43:32,388
I'm gonna try life
without any miracles for a while.

1286
01:43:34,687 --> 01:43:36,976
I hope we can still be friends.

1287
01:43:41,653 --> 01:43:43,028
- Sure.
- Sure.

1288
01:43:43,738 --> 01:43:45,316
Let's kill her.

1289
01:43:56,042 --> 01:43:58,534
Do you want to go in
and get a drink?

1290
01:43:58,754 --> 01:44:01,423
- I gotta be at work early tomorrow.
- Me too.

1291
01:44:03,008 --> 01:44:05,879
- I need to find a job tomorrow.
- Me too.

1292
01:44:06,095 --> 01:44:07,505
How about brunch Sunday?

1293
01:44:07,721 --> 01:44:11,589
That sounds good.
So we meet here around 12:30?

1294
01:44:12,643 --> 01:44:14,719
Why don't we go to Hoolihan's?

1295
01:44:15,854 --> 01:44:16,897
Not so noisy.

1296
01:44:17,523 --> 01:44:19,515
Not so many kids.

1297
01:44:22,486 --> 01:44:24,111
- Great.
- Sunday, 12:30.

1298
01:44:27,283 --> 01:44:30,034
Guess what?
You guys will never believe it.

1299
01:44:30,244 --> 01:44:34,538
I found out that it only costs
$250 to bury a cat.

1300
01:44:34,748 --> 01:44:39,743
So I figured, why don't I just put
my step-monster into a large cat suit?

1301
01:48:07,800 --> 01:48:09,885
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