1
00:00:01,602 --> 00:00:03,569
[drilling]
2
00:00:08,009 --> 00:00:09,808
ALF.
3
00:00:09,810 --> 00:00:13,345
Oh, moolai mucka hucka cahoona,
eh, eh, eh, eh, eh!
4
00:00:15,649 --> 00:00:17,649
What're you doing with my drill?
5
00:00:17,651 --> 00:00:20,319
- Drilling holes.
- What for?
6
00:00:20,321 --> 00:00:23,222
So I can get the straws
in these coconuts.
7
00:00:23,791 --> 00:00:26,025
Want a hit?
8
00:00:26,027 --> 00:00:27,459
I suppose this means
there's another
9
00:00:27,461 --> 00:00:29,395
"Gilligan's Island"
rerun tonight.
10
00:00:29,397 --> 00:00:33,065
Yeah, ship sets sail
for that uncharted desert isle
11
00:00:33,067 --> 00:00:34,867
momentarily.
12
00:00:34,869 --> 00:00:38,704
I think you're overdoing
this whole Gilligan thing.
13
00:00:38,706 --> 00:00:42,641
Why? 'Cause I'm making
a couple of Skipper coladas?
14
00:00:42,643 --> 00:00:46,245
What about the bamboo furniture
you ordered for your room?
15
00:00:46,247 --> 00:00:48,147
Hey, I sent it back.
16
00:00:48,149 --> 00:00:50,182
Wasn't even real bamboo.
17
00:00:50,184 --> 00:00:52,918
It was that nauga-boo.
18
00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:55,554
(Brian)
'ALF, it's time for Gilligan.'
19
00:00:55,556 --> 00:00:57,423
Be right with you,
little buddy.
20
00:00:57,425 --> 00:00:59,658
Gotta run, Willie.
Gilligan's on.
21
00:00:59,660 --> 00:01:02,027
Yeah, you better hurry,
if you miss this episode
22
00:01:02,029 --> 00:01:06,198
you'll have to wait three weeks
until it's on again.
23
00:01:06,200 --> 00:01:08,033
You know, it's people like you
24
00:01:08,035 --> 00:01:11,437
who drive quality programming
off the air.
25
00:01:15,709 --> 00:01:18,677
[theme music]
26
00:01:48,242 --> 00:01:51,443
[music continues]
27
00:02:19,173 --> 00:02:22,374
[instrumental music]
28
00:02:25,846 --> 00:02:28,280
¶ So join us here
each week my friend ¶
29
00:02:28,282 --> 00:02:30,449
¶ You're sure to get a smile ¶
30
00:02:30,451 --> 00:02:32,951
¶ From seven
stranded castaways ¶
31
00:02:32,953 --> 00:02:35,521
¶ Here on Gilligan's isle ¶¶
32
00:02:35,523 --> 00:02:38,190
Bravo! Author! Author!
33
00:02:38,192 --> 00:02:40,792
Powerful episode.
34
00:02:40,794 --> 00:02:43,996
- Gilligan's so funny.
- You're telling me?
35
00:02:43,998 --> 00:02:46,632
Chaplin, Keaton, Gilligan..
36
00:02:46,634 --> 00:02:50,002
The great ones
make it look so easy.
37
00:02:50,004 --> 00:02:51,970
Brian, it's time
to get ready for bed.
38
00:02:51,972 --> 00:02:53,872
- Now?
- Come on, Kate.
39
00:02:53,874 --> 00:02:56,441
The kid just watched
"Gilligan's Island."
40
00:02:56,443 --> 00:02:59,378
He needs time
for the nuances to soak in.
41
00:03:00,281 --> 00:03:02,347
They can soak in
in the bath tub.
42
00:03:02,349 --> 00:03:04,449
Aye, aye, mom.
43
00:03:05,386 --> 00:03:06,885
Hey, Kate, did I ever tell you
44
00:03:06,887 --> 00:03:09,821
how much you remind me
of Ginger?
45
00:03:09,823 --> 00:03:10,889
[sighs]
46
00:03:10,891 --> 00:03:14,193
Wow, that's the same look
of disdain
47
00:03:14,195 --> 00:03:16,628
that Ginger gives Gilligan.
48
00:03:18,332 --> 00:03:20,532
That was a compliment.
49
00:03:20,534 --> 00:03:22,734
Boy, she's no fun.
50
00:03:23,671 --> 00:03:26,104
Hey, Willie, we have to talk.
51
00:03:26,874 --> 00:03:29,174
Yeah, speak to me.
52
00:03:29,176 --> 00:03:30,842
"Gilligan's Island."
53
00:03:30,844 --> 00:03:33,845
Why do you think life there
is so much more exciting
54
00:03:33,847 --> 00:03:35,247
than life in..
55
00:03:35,249 --> 00:03:38,817
...oh...let's say this house.
56
00:03:38,819 --> 00:03:41,520
Oh, ALF, you have fun here.
57
00:03:41,522 --> 00:03:44,690
Sure.
When "Gilligan's Island" is on.
58
00:03:44,692 --> 00:03:48,060
That's four hours
every day right there.
59
00:03:48,062 --> 00:03:50,429
I'm trying to make a point here
and you're doing jokes.
60
00:03:50,431 --> 00:03:54,399
Oh, well, by all means then.
Pontificate.
61
00:03:54,401 --> 00:03:56,468
What kind of pie is that?
62
00:03:57,438 --> 00:04:01,240
- Apple.
- Cliche in a crust.
63
00:04:01,242 --> 00:04:04,042
Why did you have
six pieces of it at supper?
64
00:04:04,044 --> 00:04:07,546
The question is
why didn't I have eight?
65
00:04:07,548 --> 00:04:10,048
Because it is boring, man.
66
00:04:10,050 --> 00:04:13,552
Just like everything else
around here.
67
00:04:13,554 --> 00:04:16,188
Not like on "Gilligan's Island"
68
00:04:16,190 --> 00:04:18,557
where every day is topped off
69
00:04:18,559 --> 00:04:20,392
by one of Mary Ann's
70
00:04:20,394 --> 00:04:23,395
coconut cream pies.
71
00:04:23,397 --> 00:04:26,565
ALF, I'm not
going to waste my time
72
00:04:26,567 --> 00:04:29,067
trying to analyze
why you find real life
73
00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:32,771
more boring than some
ludicrous situation comedy.
74
00:04:32,773 --> 00:04:36,241
[gasps]
How erudite.
75
00:04:36,243 --> 00:04:38,644
Reminiscent of the professor.
76
00:04:41,215 --> 00:04:43,682
If you're bored with your pie,
can I have it?
77
00:04:46,954 --> 00:04:48,687
Guess not.
78
00:04:55,262 --> 00:04:57,729
So anyway see, this big fat
79
00:04:57,731 --> 00:05:00,098
native girl
from the next island
80
00:05:00,100 --> 00:05:02,968
eats Ginger's lipstick.
81
00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:05,304
Then before Gilligan
could marry her--
82
00:05:05,306 --> 00:05:07,439
W-wait, wait. Don't tell me.
83
00:05:07,441 --> 00:05:09,908
She goes back
to her own island.
84
00:05:09,910 --> 00:05:13,245
And she leaves
the castaways stranded.
85
00:05:13,247 --> 00:05:16,014
Did I give the ending
away somewhere?
86
00:05:16,817 --> 00:05:20,285
That's how every episode ends.
87
00:05:20,287 --> 00:05:23,221
They never leave the island.
88
00:05:24,458 --> 00:05:27,025
Well, I must've
overlooked the pattern.
89
00:05:28,462 --> 00:05:31,330
But don't overlook the idea
90
00:05:31,332 --> 00:05:34,266
that you can leave this room.
91
00:05:34,268 --> 00:05:38,103
She's right, ALF.
The fun's over for tonight.
92
00:05:38,105 --> 00:05:41,940
The fun never stops
on "Gilligan's Island."
93
00:05:41,942 --> 00:05:44,109
Unlike some other places,
where the fun stopped
94
00:05:44,111 --> 00:05:46,878
during the Eisenhower
administration.
95
00:05:48,482 --> 00:05:51,983
Just go to sleep.
96
00:05:51,985 --> 00:05:53,151
I can't.
97
00:05:53,153 --> 00:05:55,320
I tried counting castaways
98
00:05:55,322 --> 00:05:57,489
jumping over palm trees
99
00:05:57,491 --> 00:06:00,058
but the Skipper's
not the best of leapers.
100
00:06:00,961 --> 00:06:03,295
If you'll let us get some sleep
101
00:06:03,297 --> 00:06:04,730
I promise you
102
00:06:04,732 --> 00:06:06,498
we'll get back
to this Gilligan business
103
00:06:06,500 --> 00:06:08,367
first thing tomorrow and maybe
104
00:06:08,369 --> 00:06:11,937
maybe we'll even build you
a little lagoon, all your own.
105
00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:15,474
You'd do that for me?
106
00:06:15,476 --> 00:06:17,709
Yes, and then maroon you
107
00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:20,245
on the opposite shore.
108
00:06:20,247 --> 00:06:23,315
Fine with me. Aloha.
109
00:06:23,317 --> 00:06:26,551
Hey, if you need some excitement
you know where to look.
110
00:06:26,553 --> 00:06:28,253
Where's that?
111
00:06:28,255 --> 00:06:30,155
Wherever you hear this song..
112
00:06:30,157 --> 00:06:32,657
¶ Just sit right back
and you'll hear a tale ¶
113
00:06:32,659 --> 00:06:34,693
¶ A tale of a fateful trip ¶
114
00:06:34,695 --> 00:06:36,928
¶ That started
from a tropic port ¶
115
00:06:36,930 --> 00:06:39,097
¶ Aboard this tiny ship ¶
116
00:06:39,099 --> 00:06:41,266
¶ The mate was a mighty
sailing man ¶
117
00:06:41,268 --> 00:06:43,769
¶ The Skipper
brave and sure.. ¶¶
118
00:06:48,742 --> 00:06:51,576
Willie, there's something wrong
with the bathtub.
119
00:06:51,578 --> 00:06:54,913
Oh, it's probably clogged
with ALF's hair again.
120
00:06:54,915 --> 00:06:56,848
He just refuses
to vacuum himself
121
00:06:56,850 --> 00:06:58,683
before he takes a bath.
122
00:06:58,685 --> 00:07:00,352
No, it's-it's the faucet.
123
00:07:00,354 --> 00:07:02,854
- There's no water coming out.
- There's..
124
00:07:05,893 --> 00:07:07,692
Well, there's
no water here either.
125
00:07:07,694 --> 00:07:09,895
(ALF)
'Hey, could you turn that off?'
126
00:07:09,897 --> 00:07:12,764
'I'm losing pressure out here.'
127
00:07:12,766 --> 00:07:16,401
Say, what exactly
are you doing out there?
128
00:07:16,403 --> 00:07:18,904
(ALF)
'It's a surprise.'
129
00:07:18,906 --> 00:07:21,973
- He said surprise.
- The dreaded S word.
130
00:07:23,911 --> 00:07:25,877
- 'ALF, what are you--'
- 'Watch it, Willie!'
131
00:07:25,879 --> 00:07:28,380
- 'It's a little slippery.'
- 'Whoa!'
132
00:07:28,382 --> 00:07:30,315
[splash]
133
00:07:30,317 --> 00:07:31,850
(ALF)
'Surprise.'
134
00:07:37,257 --> 00:07:39,291
Well, what do you think?
135
00:07:39,293 --> 00:07:41,993
I don't believe it.
136
00:07:41,995 --> 00:07:44,329
Willie's swimming
in the lagoon I built.
137
00:07:44,331 --> 00:07:47,432
It's just like the one
on "Gilligan's Island."
138
00:07:47,434 --> 00:07:49,067
From now on, life around here
139
00:07:49,069 --> 00:07:51,670
will be much more exciting.
140
00:07:51,672 --> 00:07:53,338
You..
141
00:07:55,075 --> 00:07:57,442
Ah!
142
00:07:57,444 --> 00:08:00,378
See? It's exciting already.
143
00:08:02,783 --> 00:08:06,184
How would you like
to be buried at sea?
144
00:08:06,186 --> 00:08:08,820
You're not happy
about this, are you?
145
00:08:09,623 --> 00:08:12,157
Just tell us why you did it.
146
00:08:12,159 --> 00:08:15,093
- It was Willie's idea.
- What?
147
00:08:15,095 --> 00:08:17,462
Don't try to worm your way
out of this one.
148
00:08:17,464 --> 00:08:18,797
You said we'd build a lagoon.
149
00:08:18,799 --> 00:08:21,500
I said we'd build
a little lagoon
150
00:08:21,502 --> 00:08:24,736
not the great Tanner reef!
151
00:08:25,806 --> 00:08:27,806
Okay. Okay, I misunderstood.
152
00:08:27,808 --> 00:08:30,876
I'm sorry. I made a boo-boo.
153
00:08:31,345 --> 00:08:33,044
A boo-boo?
154
00:08:36,683 --> 00:08:39,651
I want my yard
back the way it was.
155
00:08:39,653 --> 00:08:41,786
I want trees I can trim.
156
00:08:41,788 --> 00:08:43,955
I want grass I can mow.
157
00:08:43,957 --> 00:08:48,326
No water and no hut!
158
00:08:48,328 --> 00:08:51,162
And you are gonna stay
right here
159
00:08:51,164 --> 00:08:52,564
until I get it!
160
00:08:52,566 --> 00:08:54,399
Have I made myself clear?
161
00:08:54,401 --> 00:08:57,068
What? Are you talking to me?
162
00:08:58,639 --> 00:09:01,940
I'm talking directly to you.
163
00:09:02,743 --> 00:09:04,209
Fine, fine!
164
00:09:04,211 --> 00:09:07,479
If that's what you want,
I'll turn the land of adventure
165
00:09:07,481 --> 00:09:10,215
back into dulls-ville.
166
00:09:10,217 --> 00:09:12,417
Immeditaley.
167
00:09:15,188 --> 00:09:16,988
He seems pretty upset, Kate.
168
00:09:16,990 --> 00:09:19,925
You start shoveling,
I'll go have a talk with him.
169
00:09:22,529 --> 00:09:24,863
Right. You talk to him.
170
00:09:24,865 --> 00:09:27,098
He listens to you.
171
00:09:28,869 --> 00:09:32,103
Load 16 tons, what do you get?
172
00:09:32,105 --> 00:09:35,774
Another day older
and deeper in debt.
173
00:09:35,776 --> 00:09:37,876
Whoa! I'm sweating.
174
00:09:37,878 --> 00:09:40,845
First time in 60 years.
175
00:09:40,847 --> 00:09:43,281
ALF, I brought you
some lemonade.
176
00:09:43,283 --> 00:09:47,852
Thanks. This lagoon water
tastes a little brackish.
177
00:09:47,854 --> 00:09:50,221
Well, how much longer is it
gonna take you to fill it in?
178
00:09:50,223 --> 00:09:53,258
- Six weeks.
- Six weeks?
179
00:09:53,260 --> 00:09:55,093
It only took you
one night to dig it up.
180
00:09:55,095 --> 00:09:57,629
Yeah, but I wanted to do that.
181
00:09:57,631 --> 00:09:59,531
This is painful to me.
182
00:09:59,533 --> 00:10:01,700
Have you ever had
to cover your dreams
183
00:10:01,702 --> 00:10:05,203
with a big pile of dirt?
184
00:10:05,205 --> 00:10:09,240
Well, I once had to bury
my pet turtle that died.
185
00:10:09,242 --> 00:10:11,142
Oh, this one?
186
00:10:12,379 --> 00:10:15,413
Does it say greetings
from Miami on it?
187
00:10:15,415 --> 00:10:17,983
No. "Carlsbad Caverns."
188
00:10:18,719 --> 00:10:21,086
Oh, that was Brian's.
189
00:10:21,088 --> 00:10:24,389
Sic transit gloria mundi.
190
00:10:24,391 --> 00:10:27,459
Well, I better
let you get back to work.
191
00:10:27,461 --> 00:10:29,160
Yeah. Yeah.
192
00:10:29,162 --> 00:10:31,763
Work. Work!
Oh, this isn't work.
193
00:10:31,765 --> 00:10:33,765
This is fun.
194
00:10:33,767 --> 00:10:34,966
What're you talking about?
195
00:10:34,968 --> 00:10:36,835
Lynn, I'm talking
about the thrill
196
00:10:36,837 --> 00:10:39,838
of back-breaking manual labor.
197
00:10:39,840 --> 00:10:44,342
Huh, my only regret is that
you can't share this thrill.
198
00:10:45,746 --> 00:10:47,512
Hey. Hey, wait a minute.
199
00:10:47,514 --> 00:10:51,149
Why don't I let you shovel
a couple of metric tons?
200
00:10:51,952 --> 00:10:54,853
Goodnight, ALF.
201
00:10:54,855 --> 00:10:57,489
Gilligan would've
fallen for that.
202
00:10:59,826 --> 00:11:02,227
Well, break time.
203
00:11:05,666 --> 00:11:07,866
[yawning]
204
00:11:10,470 --> 00:11:13,505
[instrumental music]
205
00:11:18,979 --> 00:11:21,279
I must've slept
through the night.
206
00:11:23,717 --> 00:11:26,184
Hey, where's my shovel?
207
00:11:27,688 --> 00:11:30,055
Where's my house?
208
00:11:30,057 --> 00:11:31,856
(Gilligan)
Skipper.
209
00:11:31,858 --> 00:11:34,826
Skipper, can I fish too?
210
00:11:34,828 --> 00:11:36,728
It's Gilligan.
211
00:11:36,730 --> 00:11:38,530
The Skipper, too.
212
00:11:38,532 --> 00:11:42,233
Sshh, Gilligan,
you'll scare the fish.
213
00:11:42,235 --> 00:11:45,704
- Oh! Ah!
- Sshh.
214
00:11:45,706 --> 00:11:47,906
You'll scare the fish.
215
00:11:49,976 --> 00:11:52,544
I'm here on Gilligan's isle.
216
00:11:58,685 --> 00:12:00,919
[instrumental music]
217
00:12:00,921 --> 00:12:02,554
"Gilligan's Island."
218
00:12:02,556 --> 00:12:05,156
I'm in rerun heaven.
219
00:12:05,158 --> 00:12:07,525
I bet I catch a big one.
220
00:12:07,527 --> 00:12:08,927
Gilligan!
221
00:12:08,929 --> 00:12:10,228
Skipper, what happened
to your hat?
222
00:12:10,230 --> 00:12:13,098
You're using it for bait.
223
00:12:14,768 --> 00:12:16,601
Oh, I'll get it back for you,
Skipper.
224
00:12:16,603 --> 00:12:18,470
Don't worry, here..
225
00:12:22,876 --> 00:12:24,442
Gilligan.
226
00:12:24,444 --> 00:12:27,078
You idiot!
227
00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:31,249
[laughing]
You guys are hilarious.
228
00:12:31,251 --> 00:12:33,885
Encore. Encore! Yeah!
229
00:12:33,887 --> 00:12:36,554
- Who are you?
- I'm ALF.
230
00:12:36,556 --> 00:12:38,356
Your biggest fan.
231
00:12:38,358 --> 00:12:41,459
I worship the sand you walk on.
232
00:12:42,562 --> 00:12:45,363
- Where did you come from?
- Melmac.
233
00:12:45,365 --> 00:12:48,633
Melmac. Is that anywhere
near Bora Bora?
234
00:12:48,635 --> 00:12:51,703
[laughing]
You guys never stop.
235
00:12:51,705 --> 00:12:54,072
Hey, hey, where are the others?
236
00:12:54,074 --> 00:12:57,075
- What others?
- The others, you know..
237
00:12:57,077 --> 00:13:00,145
¶ The millionaire and his wife ¶
238
00:13:00,147 --> 00:13:02,380
¶ A movie star ¶¶
239
00:13:02,382 --> 00:13:04,716
Oh, them well, Ginger and
Howell's built a country club
240
00:13:04,718 --> 00:13:07,252
on the other side of the island,
but they won't let us in.
241
00:13:07,254 --> 00:13:09,120
They won't let you in, Gilligan.
242
00:13:09,122 --> 00:13:13,591
Not through the front door,
but sometimes I caddy.
243
00:13:13,593 --> 00:13:15,994
Well, what about
the Professor and Mary Ann?
244
00:13:15,996 --> 00:13:18,496
Oh, well,
they're still around, they've..
245
00:13:18,498 --> 00:13:20,298
Hey, wait a minute.
246
00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:22,100
How do you know about all of us?
247
00:13:22,102 --> 00:13:24,636
Yeah, wait a minute. How do you
know about all of us?
248
00:13:24,638 --> 00:13:26,738
I just said that, Gilligan.
249
00:13:26,740 --> 00:13:28,673
I thought it sounded familiar.
250
00:13:30,277 --> 00:13:34,012
[laughing]
Oh, I never get tired of that.
251
00:13:35,582 --> 00:13:37,015
I get tired of it.
252
00:13:37,017 --> 00:13:39,751
Hey, Gilligan,
tell me something.
253
00:13:39,753 --> 00:13:42,020
Mary Ann is really cute.
254
00:13:42,022 --> 00:13:44,656
How come you never
asked her out?
255
00:13:44,658 --> 00:13:45,924
Where would we go?
256
00:13:45,926 --> 00:13:49,761
[laughing]
"Where would we go?"
257
00:13:49,763 --> 00:13:51,963
This little fellow is easily
amused, Gilligan.
258
00:13:51,965 --> 00:13:53,965
- I like him.
- Gilligan!
259
00:13:53,967 --> 00:13:57,302
Skipper. Oh!
Lunch is ready.
260
00:13:57,304 --> 00:14:00,138
Well, I see
we have another visitor.
261
00:14:00,140 --> 00:14:03,041
It's Mary Ann...and lunch.
262
00:14:03,043 --> 00:14:05,810
Two of my favorite things.
263
00:14:05,812 --> 00:14:08,446
Oh, Mary Ann, this is ALF.
He's from Melmac.
264
00:14:08,448 --> 00:14:10,148
How come everybody
can get to this island
265
00:14:10,150 --> 00:14:11,316
and none of us
can ever get off?
266
00:14:11,318 --> 00:14:12,517
- Really?
- Hmm.
267
00:14:12,519 --> 00:14:14,452
I must've overlooked
the pattern.
268
00:14:17,791 --> 00:14:19,757
[ALF laughing]
269
00:14:21,161 --> 00:14:23,795
Let's eat. Come on, ALF.
270
00:14:23,797 --> 00:14:25,997
Lunch with the castaways.
271
00:14:25,999 --> 00:14:28,266
Oh, boy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
272
00:14:29,669 --> 00:14:32,670
Mary Ann, did you make
one of your famous
273
00:14:32,672 --> 00:14:34,038
coconut cream pies?
274
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:37,075
No. They won't let me
make them anymore.
275
00:14:37,077 --> 00:14:38,877
You see, I noticed
our blood sugar levels
276
00:14:38,879 --> 00:14:40,645
were getting dangerously high.
277
00:14:40,647 --> 00:14:43,147
Plus the fact we were
sick to death of them.
278
00:14:43,149 --> 00:14:44,849
You never told me that.
279
00:14:44,851 --> 00:14:47,018
I was remiss.
280
00:14:47,020 --> 00:14:49,320
Anyway, today
we're having mangoes.
281
00:14:49,322 --> 00:14:51,723
- Oh!
- Wow. Mangoes.
282
00:14:51,725 --> 00:14:54,692
- We're sick of mangoes too.
- Oh, I like mangoes.
283
00:14:54,694 --> 00:14:57,762
I'm just sick of making
dental floss for you people.
284
00:14:58,999 --> 00:15:01,065
I get the feeling
you people aren't happy.
285
00:15:01,067 --> 00:15:03,067
We're not. We're bored.
286
00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:04,235
You know we've been doing
the same thing
287
00:15:04,237 --> 00:15:06,504
day in and day out for 23 years?
288
00:15:06,506 --> 00:15:08,506
Yeah, how would you like
to listen to the Skipper's
289
00:15:08,508 --> 00:15:11,709
boring old navy stories
over and over and over?
290
00:15:11,711 --> 00:15:13,945
I thought you liked
my navy stories.
291
00:15:13,947 --> 00:15:15,346
I was a good sailor.
292
00:15:15,348 --> 00:15:16,881
Oh, we're all familiar
with your
293
00:15:16,883 --> 00:15:18,383
nautical record, Skipper.
294
00:15:18,385 --> 00:15:22,053
You're, uh, 0 and 1, I believe.
295
00:15:22,055 --> 00:15:23,721
You see, you have
one little shipwreck
296
00:15:23,723 --> 00:15:25,924
and they never
let you forget it.
297
00:15:25,926 --> 00:15:27,558
Well, you guys
should be grateful.
298
00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:29,928
You're here
on Gilligan's Island.
299
00:15:29,930 --> 00:15:31,362
Are you kidding?
300
00:15:31,364 --> 00:15:33,231
Why, we'd be outta here
in a minute
301
00:15:33,233 --> 00:15:35,266
if smarty pants over here
can figure out a way
302
00:15:35,268 --> 00:15:36,935
for us to get off this rock!
303
00:15:36,937 --> 00:15:38,303
Don't blame me.
304
00:15:38,305 --> 00:15:39,938
Every time I devise a plan
305
00:15:39,940 --> 00:15:43,441
it's ruined by that
hebetudinous sidekick of yours.
306
00:15:45,312 --> 00:15:48,079
- Hebetudinous?
- Addlepated.
307
00:15:48,081 --> 00:15:49,714
Oh.
308
00:15:49,716 --> 00:15:50,581
Why, you can't call
309
00:15:50,583 --> 00:15:52,283
my little buddy addlepated.
310
00:15:52,285 --> 00:15:54,085
Will you stop
calling me little buddy?
311
00:15:54,087 --> 00:15:56,554
I'm in my 40's,
for crying out loud.
312
00:15:57,624 --> 00:16:00,258
Stop it, you people
are supposed to be funny
313
00:16:00,260 --> 00:16:02,560
and friendly and-and wacky.
314
00:16:02,562 --> 00:16:05,330
This is our island. You can't
tell us when to be wacky.
315
00:16:05,332 --> 00:16:08,666
Yeah, who died and made you
King Kamehameha?
316
00:16:08,668 --> 00:16:11,269
Hey, I know something
that'll keep you from fighting.
317
00:16:11,271 --> 00:16:13,271
- A sing-along.
- Oh!
318
00:16:13,273 --> 00:16:14,772
Come on, yeah!
319
00:16:14,774 --> 00:16:17,275
¶ Just sit right back
and you'll hear a tale ¶
320
00:16:17,277 --> 00:16:18,443
Everybody!
321
00:16:18,445 --> 00:16:20,244
¶ A tale of a fateful trip ¶
322
00:16:20,246 --> 00:16:23,081
- Sing!
- We don't feel like singing!
323
00:16:23,083 --> 00:16:24,749
But it's about you guys.
324
00:16:24,751 --> 00:16:27,318
"The mate was a mighty
sailor man.
325
00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:29,620
The skipper brave and sure."
326
00:16:29,622 --> 00:16:31,789
"The skipper brave and sure."
327
00:16:31,791 --> 00:16:34,459
More like big and fat.
328
00:16:34,461 --> 00:16:38,329
How would you like
a big fat fist in your face?
329
00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:41,132
Alright, forget the sing-along.
330
00:16:41,134 --> 00:16:42,800
Uh, let's re-enact the time
331
00:16:42,802 --> 00:16:45,203
when the head-hunter
came to the island.
332
00:16:45,205 --> 00:16:47,005
Now I'll be the head-hunter
333
00:16:47,007 --> 00:16:48,473
and Gilligan could be Gilligan.
334
00:16:48,475 --> 00:16:50,842
I've got a better idea.
335
00:16:50,844 --> 00:16:53,878
Let's re-enact the time
that ALF came to the island
336
00:16:53,880 --> 00:16:55,480
to help us dig.
337
00:16:55,482 --> 00:16:58,616
You be ALF and start digging.
338
00:16:59,853 --> 00:17:01,352
I'm not gonna dig.
339
00:17:01,354 --> 00:17:04,689
I refuse to dig. I won't dig.
340
00:17:04,691 --> 00:17:07,759
I won't. I won't.
I won't. I won't.
341
00:17:09,996 --> 00:17:13,331
- What am I digging here?
- Filling in a lagoon.
342
00:17:13,333 --> 00:17:15,566
Yeah, we're gonna build
a miniature golf course.
343
00:17:15,568 --> 00:17:17,869
And we're not gonna let
the Howell's play on it.
344
00:17:17,871 --> 00:17:19,337
Shall I go get your club,
Skipper?
345
00:17:19,339 --> 00:17:21,672
Oh, Gilligan,
it's not ready yet.
346
00:17:21,674 --> 00:17:23,541
It'll take a couple of months.
347
00:17:23,543 --> 00:17:25,510
Come on,
let the furry little guy work.
348
00:17:25,512 --> 00:17:27,645
It's almost time
for our favorite TV show.
349
00:17:27,647 --> 00:17:29,647
- You have a TV?
- Oh, yeah.
350
00:17:29,649 --> 00:17:31,215
I rigged one up using some
bamboo
351
00:17:31,217 --> 00:17:32,350
a couple of coconut shells
352
00:17:32,352 --> 00:17:33,518
and a 19 inch picture tube
353
00:17:33,520 --> 00:17:35,720
that washed up on the shore.
354
00:17:36,823 --> 00:17:38,089
I even built a VCR.
355
00:17:38,091 --> 00:17:40,858
Yeah, but all our tapes
are beta.
356
00:17:40,860 --> 00:17:43,327
Hey, Gilligan,
digging's really fun.
357
00:17:43,329 --> 00:17:46,431
- You wanna do some?
- Forget it.
358
00:17:46,433 --> 00:17:49,567
Even Gilligan won't fall for it.
359
00:17:49,569 --> 00:17:53,271
- 'What was that for?'
- 'Yeah, I just felt like it.'
360
00:17:53,273 --> 00:17:56,274
Wonder if the Howell's
need a fourth for golf.
361
00:17:58,778 --> 00:18:00,945
Sit down, professor,
I can't see.
362
00:18:00,947 --> 00:18:02,880
I'm adjusting the vertical hold.
363
00:18:02,882 --> 00:18:05,917
Vertical hold?
Looks like a coconut to me.
364
00:18:05,919 --> 00:18:07,852
Give me the hat, Skipper.
365
00:18:10,890 --> 00:18:13,458
(male #1 on TV)
'And now it's time
for the adventures'
366
00:18:13,460 --> 00:18:15,860
'of the Tanner family.'
367
00:18:17,397 --> 00:18:18,696
Tanner family?
368
00:18:18,698 --> 00:18:20,865
(male #1)
'Starring Willie Tanner as dad'
369
00:18:20,867 --> 00:18:24,569
'Kate Tanner as mom,
Lynn Tanner as their daughter'
370
00:18:24,571 --> 00:18:27,138
'and Brian Tanner as himself.'
371
00:18:27,140 --> 00:18:28,906
'This week's episode..'
372
00:18:28,908 --> 00:18:30,541
'...Brian takes a bath.'
373
00:18:30,543 --> 00:18:32,743
Oh, boy, this is my favorite.
374
00:18:32,745 --> 00:18:35,646
I haven't had
a bath in 23 years.
375
00:18:35,648 --> 00:18:37,548
[together]
We know.
376
00:18:39,919 --> 00:18:42,753
That meat loaf
was delicious, mom.
377
00:18:42,755 --> 00:18:47,425
Well, I hope you have room
for some apple pie.
378
00:18:47,427 --> 00:18:49,327
[together]
Oh!
379
00:18:49,329 --> 00:18:50,661
Apple pie.
380
00:18:50,663 --> 00:18:54,398
I haven't had that in 23 years.
381
00:18:54,400 --> 00:18:57,335
Ah, that meat loaf
sounds so delicious too.
382
00:18:57,337 --> 00:18:58,469
I'd like to have
something to eat that didn't
383
00:18:58,471 --> 00:19:00,938
fall out of a tree.
384
00:19:00,940 --> 00:19:02,740
I think I'll get
a glass of water.
385
00:19:02,742 --> 00:19:06,744
Oh, imagine, water you don't
have to draw from a well.
386
00:19:06,746 --> 00:19:09,914
Oh, look, Willie's wearing
a different shirt this week.
387
00:19:09,916 --> 00:19:11,582
I haven't worn a different
shirt in--
388
00:19:11,584 --> 00:19:13,851
- Ah, we know. We know.
- We know.
389
00:19:15,588 --> 00:19:18,289
Can I have some water, dad?
390
00:19:18,291 --> 00:19:20,658
You can have
lots of water, son.
391
00:19:20,660 --> 00:19:22,426
You're taking a bath.
392
00:19:22,428 --> 00:19:23,961
[all laughing]
393
00:19:23,963 --> 00:19:25,963
How does Willie
come up with that stuff?
394
00:19:25,965 --> 00:19:28,032
The great one's
make it look so easy.
395
00:19:28,034 --> 00:19:31,602
- Why was that funny?
- Why was that funny?
396
00:19:31,604 --> 00:19:33,437
These are the most entertaining
people in the world
397
00:19:33,439 --> 00:19:35,006
and you ask why was it funny?
398
00:19:35,008 --> 00:19:37,308
Besides, they can
do things we only dream of.
399
00:19:37,310 --> 00:19:39,443
Oh, they eat balanced meals.
400
00:19:39,445 --> 00:19:41,512
They change their clothes.
401
00:19:41,514 --> 00:19:44,048
They don't hit
each other with hats.
402
00:19:44,050 --> 00:19:47,018
Well, actually
they are pretty entertaining.
403
00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:49,153
Can I watch a little?
404
00:19:49,155 --> 00:19:51,489
Don't you have
some dirt to shovel?
405
00:19:51,491 --> 00:19:53,824
I can shovel dirt back home.
406
00:19:53,826 --> 00:19:55,226
You are home.
407
00:19:55,228 --> 00:19:57,028
You're a castaway now,
fuzzy buddy.
408
00:19:57,030 --> 00:19:58,696
Forever.
409
00:19:58,698 --> 00:20:00,798
I don't wanna be a castaway.
410
00:20:00,800 --> 00:20:03,134
I thought this place
would be fun.
411
00:20:03,136 --> 00:20:07,071
Now I realize, it's only fun
in half hour chunks.
412
00:20:08,675 --> 00:20:11,309
But you wanted to be
on "Gilligan's Island."
413
00:20:11,311 --> 00:20:14,011
That's where the fun
never stops.
414
00:20:14,013 --> 00:20:15,880
Remember?
415
00:20:15,882 --> 00:20:18,349
Remember?
416
00:20:18,351 --> 00:20:21,352
Remember?
417
00:20:21,354 --> 00:20:24,188
I was wrong. I wanna go home.
418
00:20:24,190 --> 00:20:27,425
I wanna go home.
I wanna go home.
419
00:20:27,427 --> 00:20:31,229
I wanna go home.
Wanna go home.
420
00:20:31,231 --> 00:20:33,931
Wanna go home.
Wanna go home.
421
00:20:33,933 --> 00:20:37,068
Wanna go home.
Wanna go home.
422
00:20:37,070 --> 00:20:41,205
- I wanna go home.
- ALF, wake up.
423
00:20:41,207 --> 00:20:43,608
Hey.
424
00:20:43,610 --> 00:20:47,678
Oh, Willie, you came all the way
out here to rescue me.
425
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:50,214
It wasn't really
all that far, ALF.
426
00:20:50,216 --> 00:20:52,116
I was just in the kitchen.
427
00:20:53,586 --> 00:20:56,053
Oh. Well, listen.
428
00:20:56,055 --> 00:20:57,555
I was wrong.
429
00:20:57,557 --> 00:21:00,725
Adventure isn't on some
uncharted desert isle.
430
00:21:00,727 --> 00:21:04,161
It's right here
in your own backyard.
431
00:21:05,231 --> 00:21:07,398
What's left of it.
432
00:21:07,400 --> 00:21:09,834
That's good to hear, ALF.
433
00:21:10,536 --> 00:21:11,769
I'll see you later.
434
00:21:11,771 --> 00:21:13,904
Well, don't I get
to come with you?
435
00:21:13,906 --> 00:21:17,975
What about all that mindless
treacle I just oozed?
436
00:21:17,977 --> 00:21:21,545
As treacle goes,
that was pretty sweet.
437
00:21:21,547 --> 00:21:24,148
Too bad it didn't
fill up the hole.
438
00:21:24,150 --> 00:21:26,217
Get to work.
439
00:21:28,621 --> 00:21:30,955
I hate this place.
440
00:21:35,295 --> 00:21:37,862
[instrumental music]
441
00:21:40,466 --> 00:21:42,733
[burps]
442
00:21:42,735 --> 00:21:46,103
Delicious meat loaf, Kate.
Best I've ever had.
443
00:21:46,105 --> 00:21:49,473
Best anyone's ever had.
Best in the world.
444
00:21:49,475 --> 00:21:52,009
Simply the best.
445
00:21:52,011 --> 00:21:54,679
Thank you, ALF.
Would you like some pie?
446
00:21:54,681 --> 00:21:57,948
- What kind?
- Coconut cream.
447
00:21:57,950 --> 00:22:00,785
Pass.
448
00:22:00,787 --> 00:22:03,154
Oh, hi, I'm sorry
I'm late for dinner.
449
00:22:03,156 --> 00:22:06,324
[laughing]
"Sorry I'm later for dinner."
450
00:22:06,326 --> 00:22:08,759
Willie, you're a scream.
451
00:22:08,761 --> 00:22:10,995
How does he come up
with that stuff?
452
00:22:10,997 --> 00:22:14,965
- What stuff?
- Ha! Oh, there he goes again.
453
00:22:14,967 --> 00:22:18,936
- What is wrong with you?
- Uh, wrong? Nothing's wrong.
454
00:22:18,938 --> 00:22:21,172
I'm the happiest alien on Earth.
455
00:22:21,174 --> 00:22:23,607
What could possibly
be wrong here?
456
00:22:23,609 --> 00:22:27,244
In the fun-filled,
action packed Tanner household.
457
00:22:29,315 --> 00:22:32,316
How's the backyard coming?
458
00:22:32,318 --> 00:22:34,118
Uh, well, uh..
459
00:22:34,120 --> 00:22:36,654
I'd-I'd like to discuss
that with you at length
460
00:22:36,656 --> 00:22:39,890
and, uh,
later would be a good time.
461
00:22:43,563 --> 00:22:45,963
He's been watching "Bonanza."
462
00:22:49,001 --> 00:22:52,737
I'll, uh,
return the stage coach tomorrow.
463
00:22:55,708 --> 00:22:58,909
[instrumental music]
464
00:23:02,181 --> 00:23:05,149
[theme music]
465
00:23:30,376 --> 00:23:32,343
[ALF laughing]