1
00:00:06,807 --> 00:00:09,810
[theme music]

2
00:00:52,019 --> 00:00:53,954
Trust me, I know
what I'm doing.

3
00:00:54,088 --> 00:00:56,990
[gunshot, glass shattering]

4
00:01:02,630 --> 00:01:05,366
[soft music]

5
00:01:20,114 --> 00:01:20,981
Who are you?

6
00:01:21,115 --> 00:01:22,416
Hold it, ski bum.

7
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[silenced shot]

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00:01:25,986 --> 00:01:26,854
[loud gasping]

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00:01:26,987 --> 00:01:29,957
[chuckles]

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00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:31,125
REPORTER (ON VIDEO):
12 hours have

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passed since the
mayor's daughter

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was first reported missing.

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The police now believe
she was kidnapped

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or is just very good at hiding.

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The abduction took
place, and the mayor--

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Now, talk, Chief.

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One of our squad cars found
this in a telephone booth.

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An anonymous caller tipped
us off to his location.

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We have your daughter.

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Pay us $1 million
or we'll kill her.

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Details later.

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Have a nice day.

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By the way, sir, your
home security guard

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is in critical condition.

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The poor man, he was
like an employee to me.

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We're at the scene of
a liquor store robbery

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that was thwarted by
the man beside me,

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Inspector Sledge Hammer.

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Inspector Hammer,
tell us what happened.

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Well, Miss, I
was in this store

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when two thugs
entered and threatened

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the owner with shotguns.

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At that time, I drew my
magnum and killed them both.

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Then I bought some
eggs and some milk

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00:02:19,240 --> 00:02:21,942
and some of those
little cocktail weenies.

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Inspector Hammer, was
what you did in the store

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00:02:24,745 --> 00:02:25,946
absolutely necessary?

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Oh, yes, I had no
groceries at all.

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[laughter]

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This Sledge Hammer, who is he?

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A menace.

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He used to fire warning
shots at jaywalkers.

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Now, after this
liquor store incident,

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I placed him on a six-month's
suspension with orders

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not to leave his apartment.

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Well, take him off suspension
and put him on this case.

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Mr. Mayor, rumor has it
that this man talks to his gun

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like it was a person.

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This isn't open
for discussion.

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This is an order.

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I want Sledge Hammer.

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[intense tune]

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[gunshots]

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00:03:00,914 --> 00:03:02,683
[phone rings]

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00:03:02,816 --> 00:03:05,753
[gunshots]

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[PEOPLE CLATTERING, BANGING ON
DOOR]

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00:03:12,560 --> 00:03:13,894
Yeah, hello.
Hello.

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00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:15,596
Just hang on a second.

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00:03:15,729 --> 00:03:18,098
Hey, people, let's show some
consideration and keep it down,

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00:03:18,232 --> 00:03:18,999
will you?

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00:03:19,132 --> 00:03:20,668
I'm on the phone, huh?

62
00:03:20,801 --> 00:03:23,203
Hey, other people
live here, all right?

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00:03:23,971 --> 00:03:25,038
Noisy neighbors.

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OK, go ahead, speak to me.

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You got it.

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I'll be right down.

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Did you hear that?

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I'm off suspension.

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Looks like they can't
keep a good man down, huh?

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Or me either.

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00:03:39,253 --> 00:03:41,755
[engine roaring]

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00:03:46,193 --> 00:03:49,229
[screeching]

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Sledge Hammer.

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00:03:54,435 --> 00:03:55,303
All right, what's going on?

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I gotta get to work.

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I've got a sniper
on that roof.

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[loud crash]

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00:04:01,141 --> 00:04:01,909
Is the building evacuated?

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00:04:02,042 --> 00:04:03,010
Yeah.

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00:04:05,679 --> 00:04:08,782
We got vermin on the
roof, but I got an idea.

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00:04:08,916 --> 00:04:10,050
Who are you talking to?

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00:04:10,183 --> 00:04:11,084
Nobody.

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[gunshot]

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00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:26,300
OFFICER: Hammer,
what are you doing?

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You'll get killed.

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00:04:27,735 --> 00:04:30,771
[dramatic music, gunshots]

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[loud explosion]

88
00:04:51,659 --> 00:04:54,094
I think I got him.

89
00:04:54,227 --> 00:04:57,164
[dramatic music]

90
00:05:01,569 --> 00:05:02,470
Whoa.

91
00:05:05,406 --> 00:05:07,074
What's the problem?

92
00:05:07,207 --> 00:05:09,610
The lousy machine
took my money.

93
00:05:09,743 --> 00:05:11,445
Stand away from it.

94
00:05:11,579 --> 00:05:12,346
No.

95
00:05:12,480 --> 00:05:15,383
[gunshots]

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00:05:17,785 --> 00:05:19,286
Hammer!

97
00:05:19,420 --> 00:05:20,721
In my office, right now.

98
00:05:25,659 --> 00:05:27,628
What the hell did I
tell you about firing

99
00:05:27,761 --> 00:05:28,996
your gun inside, Hammer?

100
00:05:29,129 --> 00:05:31,131
Oh, you said,
don't-- don't do it.

101
00:05:31,264 --> 00:05:32,566
You damn right I
told you not to do it.

102
00:05:32,700 --> 00:05:34,001
And take off those
damn sunglasses

103
00:05:34,134 --> 00:05:35,536
when I'm talking to you.
- What sunglasses?

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00:05:35,669 --> 00:05:36,804
I said take them off.

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00:05:39,607 --> 00:05:40,874
You couldn't resist
it, could you, Hammer?

106
00:05:41,008 --> 00:05:43,811
You couldn't resist
blowing up a building

107
00:05:43,944 --> 00:05:46,580
on your way to work this
morning, could you, Hammer?

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00:05:46,714 --> 00:05:49,883
Look, the only way to fight
criminals is to be, you know,

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00:05:50,017 --> 00:05:51,018
wilder than they are.

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[whistles, imitates blowing up]

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00:05:52,553 --> 00:05:53,421
I mean, that's my message.

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I feel a migraine coming on.

113
00:05:55,523 --> 00:05:56,824
There's a migraine here.

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00:05:56,957 --> 00:05:57,991
Captain, I feel
that the reason

115
00:05:58,125 --> 00:05:59,259
you keep getting
these headaches is

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that your neck is out of line.

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00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:03,163
What you need is a
chiropractic adjustment.

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[snapping, screaming]

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00:06:05,799 --> 00:06:10,270
You're sadistic, depraved,
bloodthirsty, barbaric.

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00:06:10,404 --> 00:06:11,505
Is that why you
called me in here,

121
00:06:11,639 --> 00:06:12,740
to shower me with compliments?

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00:06:12,873 --> 00:06:14,074
No.

123
00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:15,208
I suppose you
heard what happened

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00:06:15,342 --> 00:06:16,176
to the mayor's daughter.

125
00:06:16,309 --> 00:06:17,778
Nope.

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00:06:17,911 --> 00:06:21,715
She was kidnapped last night
from the mayor's own home.

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00:06:21,849 --> 00:06:24,752
And you have been
personally requested

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00:06:24,885 --> 00:06:27,555
to head up the investigation
into the manner.

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00:06:27,688 --> 00:06:29,623
Requested, really?

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00:06:29,757 --> 00:06:31,058
By whom?

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00:06:31,191 --> 00:06:32,560
By me.

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00:06:32,693 --> 00:06:35,696
I'm impressed with the way
you get results, Hammer.

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00:06:35,829 --> 00:06:38,466
Chief Reisner told me once
you obtained information

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00:06:38,599 --> 00:06:40,801
from a suspect by tying
him to the back of your car

135
00:06:40,934 --> 00:06:42,536
and dragging him
through half the city.

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00:06:42,670 --> 00:06:44,472
No, that's bunk.

137
00:06:44,605 --> 00:06:45,639
Half the city?

138
00:06:45,773 --> 00:06:46,707
No.

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00:06:46,840 --> 00:06:48,041
We never left the parking lot.

140
00:06:48,175 --> 00:06:52,312
Chief, I find this
man perfectly rational.

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00:06:52,446 --> 00:06:53,747
Anybody mind if I smoke?

142
00:06:53,881 --> 00:06:55,315
Oh, you light a
cigarette in front of me,

143
00:06:55,449 --> 00:06:56,984
sir, you know what you get?

144
00:06:57,117 --> 00:06:58,619
Oh, no.

145
00:06:58,752 --> 00:06:59,820
A stick of gum.

146
00:06:59,953 --> 00:07:01,421
The surgeon general
has determined

147
00:07:01,555 --> 00:07:03,256
that cigarette smoking is
very bad for your health.

148
00:07:03,390 --> 00:07:05,959
Why don't you just quit?

149
00:07:06,093 --> 00:07:07,060
Pardon me.

150
00:07:07,194 --> 00:07:08,996
Oh, Detective,
please, come in.

151
00:07:09,129 --> 00:07:11,565
Gentlemen, meet
Detective Dori Doreau.

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00:07:11,699 --> 00:07:14,234
There is no one more
knowledgeable in her field.

153
00:07:14,367 --> 00:07:16,003
What's that, arranging
things in alphabetical order?

154
00:07:16,136 --> 00:07:18,438
TRUNK: Hammer, I'm warning you.

155
00:07:18,572 --> 00:07:20,107
It's all right, Captain.

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00:07:20,240 --> 00:07:22,643
My background in terrorist
psychology and defense tactics

157
00:07:22,776 --> 00:07:24,344
should hold its own
against any joke.

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00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:35,422
[laughter]

159
00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:39,026
The voice of the man who
called with the ransom note tip

160
00:07:39,159 --> 00:07:40,694
was put on tape.

161
00:07:40,828 --> 00:07:43,030
The voice belongs to the leader
of a clandestine terrorist

162
00:07:43,163 --> 00:07:45,132
group known as the A-V-O-N.

163
00:07:45,265 --> 00:07:45,999
Avon?

164
00:07:46,133 --> 00:07:47,635
Ding dong.

165
00:07:47,768 --> 00:07:50,838
The Allied Violent
Offense Network.

166
00:07:50,971 --> 00:07:52,673
Could we kill the
lights, please?

167
00:07:52,806 --> 00:07:54,341
Keep that gun in
your holster, Hammer.

168
00:08:01,682 --> 00:08:04,785
This is the symbol
of the organization.

169
00:08:04,918 --> 00:08:07,487
I feel it speaks for itself.

170
00:08:07,621 --> 00:08:10,824
This is the leader of the
group, Weird Williard Luxley.

171
00:08:10,958 --> 00:08:13,994
Luxley's family was so certain
their son would turn out rotten,

172
00:08:14,127 --> 00:08:17,497
they put him up for adoption
three years before he was born.

173
00:08:17,631 --> 00:08:21,201
This is Feliz Navidad, a
fiery Latin revolutionary

174
00:08:21,334 --> 00:08:22,736
who illegally
entered this country

175
00:08:22,870 --> 00:08:26,506
by posing as Julio Iglesias.

176
00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:28,709
Lastly, we have
former member, Kurt

177
00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:32,479
Kruggle, a despicable pervert.

178
00:08:32,613 --> 00:08:34,514
First arrested five
years ago for making

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00:08:34,648 --> 00:08:36,216
love to a fire hydrant.

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00:08:36,349 --> 00:08:38,552
An additional charge was brought
against Kruggle for parking

181
00:08:38,686 --> 00:08:39,887
in front of it.

182
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:42,923
Could we have the
lights, please?

183
00:08:43,056 --> 00:08:44,191
Well, I've heard enough.

184
00:08:44,324 --> 00:08:45,926
I'll just find Kruggle
and torture him

185
00:08:46,059 --> 00:08:48,095
and get him to tell me where the
other scum suckers are hiding.

186
00:08:48,228 --> 00:08:51,264
I don't care what
methods you use, Hammer.

187
00:08:51,398 --> 00:08:53,433
Just bring back my daughter.

188
00:08:53,567 --> 00:08:56,169
I will, sir, dead or alive.

189
00:08:56,303 --> 00:08:58,839
But the point is to bring
her back alive, Hammer.

190
00:08:58,972 --> 00:08:59,740
All right, no.

191
00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:00,874
Alive, of course.

192
00:09:01,008 --> 00:09:02,175
I don't why I'd say dead.
No, no.

193
00:09:02,309 --> 00:09:03,611
I don't know where my head's at.

194
00:09:03,744 --> 00:09:08,281
Sledge, it's my idea
that you and Doreau would

195
00:09:08,415 --> 00:09:12,920
sort of team up on this case.

196
00:09:13,053 --> 00:09:15,589
She's a woman, sir.

197
00:09:15,723 --> 00:09:16,790
She's a-- look at her.

198
00:09:16,924 --> 00:09:17,858
She's a woman, sir.

199
00:09:17,991 --> 00:09:19,092
She's clearly a woman, right?

200
00:09:19,226 --> 00:09:20,360
With all due respect,
look, I'm not

201
00:09:20,493 --> 00:09:21,528
going to partner with a woman.

202
00:09:21,662 --> 00:09:22,963
You will partner
with Pia Zadora

203
00:09:23,096 --> 00:09:24,064
if the chief asked you to.

204
00:09:24,197 --> 00:09:25,465
Do you understand that?

205
00:09:25,599 --> 00:09:26,867
The only partner I need
is my amigo right here.

206
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:27,768
I told you to put that--

207
00:09:27,901 --> 00:09:30,871
[yelling]

208
00:09:31,772 --> 00:09:32,706
Sorry, Captain.

209
00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:33,974
That was reflex.
- Reflex?

210
00:09:34,107 --> 00:09:34,908
Reflex?

211
00:09:35,042 --> 00:09:37,811
I kill you.

212
00:09:37,945 --> 00:09:38,912
Come on, lady.

213
00:09:43,617 --> 00:09:46,720
That man makes Rambo
look like Pee-wee Herman.

214
00:09:46,854 --> 00:09:49,757
[laughter]

215
00:09:52,726 --> 00:09:54,161
Well, I take it
you're driving.

216
00:09:54,294 --> 00:09:56,329
We better start
searching for Kruggle.

217
00:09:56,463 --> 00:09:58,999
All right, look, lady, as long
as we're stuck together, let's

218
00:09:59,132 --> 00:10:00,133
get one thing
straight, all right?

219
00:10:00,267 --> 00:10:01,168
I'm the guy, all right?

220
00:10:01,301 --> 00:10:02,335
I'm the man.

221
00:10:02,469 --> 00:10:03,503
I'm the guy, and
I call the shots.

222
00:10:03,637 --> 00:10:05,005
Got it?

223
00:10:05,138 --> 00:10:07,574
I call the shots, and I
fire the shots, comprehendo?

224
00:10:07,708 --> 00:10:09,910
Look, why don't you just
drop this adolescent macho cop

225
00:10:10,043 --> 00:10:11,111
act of yours?

226
00:10:11,244 --> 00:10:12,512
It's humanly
impossible for anyone

227
00:10:12,646 --> 00:10:16,183
to be as nihilistic as
you're pretending to be.

228
00:10:16,316 --> 00:10:17,117
[screaming]

229
00:10:17,250 --> 00:10:18,085
WOMAN: Stop it.

230
00:10:18,218 --> 00:10:18,986
Stop it.
- What?

231
00:10:19,119 --> 00:10:19,853
[screaming]

232
00:10:19,987 --> 00:10:20,788
Stop.

233
00:10:20,921 --> 00:10:23,957
[loud bang]

234
00:10:26,293 --> 00:10:30,197
Freeze, Pizzaface.

235
00:10:30,330 --> 00:10:31,631
There you are, ma'am.
You all right?

236
00:10:31,765 --> 00:10:32,499
Oh, thank you.

237
00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:33,967
It's not dirty.

238
00:10:34,101 --> 00:10:35,435
This kind of stuff
shouldn't happen, should it?

239
00:10:35,568 --> 00:10:36,436
Bye-bye.

240
00:10:36,569 --> 00:10:37,504
All right, stand up, Rag Weed.

241
00:10:37,637 --> 00:10:38,538
Pronto.

242
00:10:41,608 --> 00:10:43,443
Hammer, what are you doing?

243
00:10:43,576 --> 00:10:45,979
I'm going to teach this
little genetic mistake a lesson.

244
00:10:46,113 --> 00:10:47,380
We're in front of City Hall.

245
00:10:47,514 --> 00:10:48,949
You want to be taken in
for police brutality?

246
00:10:52,185 --> 00:10:55,355
All right, all
right, I'm not even

247
00:10:55,488 --> 00:10:56,690
going to touch the sea urchin.

248
00:10:56,824 --> 00:10:58,291
Stand back, Doreau.

249
00:10:58,425 --> 00:11:02,295
So, Big Shot, time to pick
on somebody your own size.

250
00:11:02,429 --> 00:11:03,563
Punch yourself in the mouth.

251
00:11:03,697 --> 00:11:04,464
What?

252
00:11:04,597 --> 00:11:05,799
You heard me.

253
00:11:05,933 --> 00:11:06,967
Punch yourself in
the mouth, right now.

254
00:11:07,100 --> 00:11:08,035
It's an order.

255
00:11:11,104 --> 00:11:13,741
Oh, come on, harder than that,
otherwise, I'm going to do it,

256
00:11:13,874 --> 00:11:14,975
I'm telling you.

257
00:11:15,108 --> 00:11:16,844
[blow lands]

258
00:11:16,977 --> 00:11:18,846
All right, that was nice.

259
00:11:18,979 --> 00:11:20,313
Now, slug yourself
in the stomach.

260
00:11:20,447 --> 00:11:22,315
[grunting]

261
00:11:22,449 --> 00:11:24,051
All right, look, I'm
running out of time.

262
00:11:24,184 --> 00:11:27,154
Just finish yourself off.

263
00:11:27,287 --> 00:11:28,588
[gun cocks]

264
00:11:28,722 --> 00:11:31,658
[blows landing]

265
00:11:43,904 --> 00:11:46,907
Trust me, I know what I'm doing.

266
00:11:47,040 --> 00:11:49,676
All right, Doreau, let's scour
the seamy side of this city

267
00:11:49,810 --> 00:11:53,013
and find ourselves a sleaze
ball by the name of Kruggle.

268
00:11:57,017 --> 00:11:59,352
I recommend you invest
in capping industrial.

269
00:12:02,589 --> 00:12:05,558
[light music]

270
00:12:18,338 --> 00:12:19,406
You sure he's here?

271
00:12:19,539 --> 00:12:20,607
That's his license.
That's his van.

272
00:12:20,740 --> 00:12:21,574
Girls wait in the car.

273
00:12:21,708 --> 00:12:23,076
Yeah, I'm with you.

274
00:12:23,210 --> 00:12:24,912
Look, you're going to
get me killed, aren't you?

275
00:12:25,045 --> 00:12:27,314
Look, Hammer, I'm a
cop, not some schoolmarm.

276
00:12:27,447 --> 00:12:29,082
Go away, go away, go away.

277
00:12:29,216 --> 00:12:32,252
All right, just make sure nobody
comes in behind me, all right?

278
00:12:32,385 --> 00:12:33,320
[yelling]

279
00:12:33,453 --> 00:12:36,289
[women gasping]

280
00:12:36,423 --> 00:12:37,825
OK, ladies, wait in the john.

281
00:12:37,958 --> 00:12:40,093
They don't speak English.

282
00:12:40,227 --> 00:12:42,762
[non-english]

283
00:12:42,896 --> 00:12:44,764
You spoke perfect Swedish.

284
00:12:44,898 --> 00:12:46,233
Those are the
only words I know.

285
00:12:46,366 --> 00:12:48,101
All right, look, I'm a cop.

286
00:12:48,235 --> 00:12:49,502
My name is Sledge Hammer.

287
00:12:49,636 --> 00:12:50,403
Sledge Hammer?

288
00:12:50,537 --> 00:12:52,239
[coughs]

289
00:12:52,372 --> 00:12:54,241
All right, come on, I'm
taking you in for questioning.

290
00:12:54,374 --> 00:12:57,744
Wait, come on, I got to
put some clothes on first.

291
00:12:57,878 --> 00:12:59,813
Well, go ahead and do it.

292
00:12:59,947 --> 00:13:03,416
Could you turn around, please?

293
00:13:03,550 --> 00:13:04,284
I'm modest.

294
00:13:04,417 --> 00:13:07,287
[laughter]

295
00:13:11,925 --> 00:13:16,964
OK, I'm decent now,
you stinking cop.

296
00:13:18,498 --> 00:13:20,033
Always keep a gun on you
when you're getting a massage?

297
00:13:20,167 --> 00:13:21,634
How else does a creep
like me going to get

298
00:13:21,768 --> 00:13:23,670
a woman to even give him one?

299
00:13:23,803 --> 00:13:26,806
All right, drop the piece, eh?

300
00:13:26,940 --> 00:13:28,375
Slowly.

301
00:13:28,508 --> 00:13:30,310
[chuckles]

302
00:13:30,443 --> 00:13:33,313
[gunshots]

303
00:13:35,182 --> 00:13:37,450
I heard a shot.

304
00:13:37,584 --> 00:13:40,453
[blows landing]

305
00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:45,158
Doreau, that was
excessively violent

306
00:13:45,292 --> 00:13:47,494
and completely unnecessary.

307
00:13:47,627 --> 00:13:48,728
I loved it.

308
00:13:48,862 --> 00:13:49,796
It was poetry in motion.

309
00:13:49,930 --> 00:13:51,198
Thank you.

310
00:13:51,331 --> 00:13:52,632
I was top of my class
in hand-to-hand combat.

311
00:13:56,136 --> 00:13:58,838
I'd like to fight
you sometime, Doreau.

312
00:13:58,972 --> 00:14:01,408
You're on.

313
00:14:01,541 --> 00:14:03,543
So who do you think
the cowboy is?

314
00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:05,678
Oh, he's the manager,
good friend of mine.

315
00:14:05,812 --> 00:14:07,480
Let's get out of here
before he wakes up.

316
00:14:12,152 --> 00:14:14,754
OK, I have access to all the
names and salaries of everyone

317
00:14:14,888 --> 00:14:15,822
on the mayor's payroll.

318
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:22,395
Why are you so prejudiced
against computers?

319
00:14:22,529 --> 00:14:26,900
That's how I met my wife,
in a computer dating service.

320
00:14:27,034 --> 00:14:28,268
You're married, Hammer?

321
00:14:28,401 --> 00:14:30,270
Was married.

322
00:14:30,403 --> 00:14:32,539
Nah, she ran off
about three years ago.

323
00:14:32,672 --> 00:14:36,109
Ran off with some geek
member of the Peace Corps,

324
00:14:36,243 --> 00:14:37,610
said he was more
sensitive than me.

325
00:14:37,744 --> 00:14:38,678
Can you believe that?

326
00:14:38,811 --> 00:14:40,447
Oh, my god.

327
00:14:40,580 --> 00:14:42,115
Well, you know,
some women just can't

328
00:14:42,249 --> 00:14:43,516
take being married to a cop.

329
00:14:43,650 --> 00:14:45,218
I don't know.

330
00:14:45,352 --> 00:14:49,589
I guess some women just can't
take being married to a cop.

331
00:14:49,722 --> 00:14:51,791
She was always accusing me of
bringing my work home with me,

332
00:14:51,925 --> 00:14:53,060
you know?

333
00:14:53,193 --> 00:14:54,461
She just didn't
understand, you know?

334
00:14:54,594 --> 00:14:55,562
You don't leave
it at the office.

335
00:14:55,695 --> 00:14:56,463
I'm a cop.

336
00:14:56,596 --> 00:14:58,431
I'm a cop.

337
00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:02,202
All the other cops
are wusses, except me.

338
00:15:04,938 --> 00:15:08,441
I can't let my guard
down for one minute.

339
00:15:08,575 --> 00:15:11,044
Hammer, you just did.

340
00:15:19,252 --> 00:15:21,154
All right, punch up the
mayor's personal finances,

341
00:15:21,288 --> 00:15:22,922
will you?

342
00:15:23,056 --> 00:15:25,258
I'll bet the perpetrator is a
member of his immediate family.

343
00:15:25,392 --> 00:15:26,659
Well, that only
leaves the mayor's

344
00:15:26,793 --> 00:15:28,595
wife, which is highly unlikely.

345
00:15:28,728 --> 00:15:30,597
She's one of the most
respected women in the city.

346
00:15:33,266 --> 00:15:34,767
Look at this.

347
00:15:34,901 --> 00:15:37,637
Mrs. Flambo supports every
worthy charity in existence.

348
00:15:37,770 --> 00:15:38,638
Yeah.

349
00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:40,273
All except my favorite one.

350
00:15:40,407 --> 00:15:41,341
What's that?

351
00:15:41,474 --> 00:15:44,177
Toy guns for Tots.

352
00:15:44,311 --> 00:15:45,645
TRUNK: Hammer!

353
00:15:45,778 --> 00:15:46,679
Hammer!

354
00:15:46,813 --> 00:15:47,680
Hammer!

355
00:15:47,814 --> 00:15:49,116
You did it again, Hammer.

356
00:15:49,249 --> 00:15:51,484
Kurt Kruggle is filing
a complaint against you

357
00:15:51,618 --> 00:15:53,186
as we speak right now, Hammer.

358
00:15:53,320 --> 00:15:55,922
Captain Trunk,
Hammer has managed

359
00:15:56,056 --> 00:15:57,457
to obtain vital information.

360
00:15:57,590 --> 00:15:59,159
Shut up, Doreau.

361
00:15:59,292 --> 00:16:01,361
You keep defending
this buffoon's actions,

362
00:16:01,494 --> 00:16:03,263
and you're going to
be in hot water, too.

363
00:16:10,570 --> 00:16:13,540
[laughter]

364
00:16:17,944 --> 00:16:19,946
Well, the traitor is the wife.

365
00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:21,181
What, Mrs. Flambo?

366
00:16:21,314 --> 00:16:22,449
That's right,
the wife kidnapped

367
00:16:22,582 --> 00:16:24,517
her own innocent daughter.

368
00:16:24,651 --> 00:16:26,019
I'm going to go have
a chat with her.

369
00:16:26,153 --> 00:16:29,556
Look, Hammer, I totally
disagree with this theory,

370
00:16:29,689 --> 00:16:33,293
but as your partner, I'm
prepared to back you up 100%.

371
00:16:33,426 --> 00:16:34,527
Let me go with you.

372
00:16:34,661 --> 00:16:35,762
I'm just going to
make a few calls.

373
00:16:45,438 --> 00:16:46,306
I like her.

374
00:16:46,439 --> 00:16:47,207
MAN: Who are you talking to?

375
00:16:47,340 --> 00:16:48,375
Oh, I'm just--

376
00:16:48,508 --> 00:16:51,378
[stutters]

377
00:16:54,281 --> 00:16:55,182
My wife?

378
00:16:55,315 --> 00:16:56,249
That's absurd.

379
00:16:56,383 --> 00:16:58,751
Trust me, I know
what I'm doing.

380
00:16:58,885 --> 00:17:01,020
Sorry about the handcuffs,
sir, but she resisted arrest.

381
00:17:01,154 --> 00:17:02,021
She's quite a fighter.

382
00:17:02,155 --> 00:17:02,889
Well, I guess you know that.

383
00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:03,756
Janice.

384
00:17:03,890 --> 00:17:04,691
Take it off.

385
00:17:04,824 --> 00:17:06,659
Take it off.

386
00:17:06,793 --> 00:17:08,228
Jack, you would not
believe the indignity

387
00:17:08,361 --> 00:17:09,162
I've been put through.

388
00:17:09,296 --> 00:17:10,763
[screaming]

389
00:17:10,897 --> 00:17:12,532
I hate to say it,
sir, but your wife

390
00:17:12,665 --> 00:17:17,337
is a lying, scheming, deceitful,
no good piece of white trash.

391
00:17:18,338 --> 00:17:19,606
Oh, I've known that for years.

392
00:17:19,739 --> 00:17:21,040
But she had nothing to
do with the kidnapping.

393
00:17:21,174 --> 00:17:24,677
Chief, put this numbskull
back on suspension

394
00:17:24,811 --> 00:17:25,712
for the rest of his life.

395
00:17:25,845 --> 00:17:27,046
Now, wait, I don't understand.

396
00:17:27,180 --> 00:17:29,015
I've just had a call
from the kidnappers.

397
00:17:29,149 --> 00:17:30,683
A-ha.

398
00:17:30,817 --> 00:17:33,220
I have no course now, but
to capitulate, thanks to you.

399
00:17:33,353 --> 00:17:37,056
Doreau, I want you to
deliver the ransom to them.

400
00:17:37,190 --> 00:17:38,525
Wait a minute, whoever
that messenger is,

401
00:17:38,658 --> 00:17:40,127
is probably going to get killed.

402
00:17:40,260 --> 00:17:41,228
Let me do it.

403
00:17:41,361 --> 00:17:43,263
That sounds like
a terrific idea.

404
00:17:43,396 --> 00:17:44,797
No.

405
00:17:44,931 --> 00:17:48,768
The last thing I need in
my hands now is a shootout.

406
00:17:48,901 --> 00:17:49,869
Now, get out.

407
00:17:54,241 --> 00:17:55,942
Be careful, Doreau.

408
00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:59,279
I will, Hammer.

409
00:17:59,412 --> 00:18:02,382
[laughter]

410
00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:22,902
Hello?

411
00:18:28,541 --> 00:18:31,110
[eerie tune]

412
00:18:34,914 --> 00:18:35,815
Anybody here?

413
00:18:40,620 --> 00:18:43,456
[loud bang]

414
00:18:43,590 --> 00:18:45,658
Step forward, slowly.

415
00:18:50,163 --> 00:18:54,334
So they sent us a little lady,
and a foxy one at that, too.

416
00:18:54,467 --> 00:18:57,337
[chuckles evilly]

417
00:18:59,172 --> 00:19:00,707
Hand over the money, Tramp.

418
00:19:00,840 --> 00:19:03,476
Not until I see that
Francine Flambo is safe.

419
00:19:03,610 --> 00:19:04,944
Police.
WOMAN: Yeah.

420
00:19:05,077 --> 00:19:05,812
Come on.

421
00:19:05,945 --> 00:19:06,713
Come on.

422
00:19:06,846 --> 00:19:07,647
Come on.

423
00:19:07,780 --> 00:19:10,016
[moaning]

424
00:19:10,983 --> 00:19:12,519
How are you doing, Francine?

425
00:19:12,652 --> 00:19:15,154
I haven't eaten in a
day and a half, and I

426
00:19:15,288 --> 00:19:16,823
missed last night's "Dynasty."

427
00:19:20,159 --> 00:19:21,328
[chuckles]

428
00:19:21,461 --> 00:19:23,463
Police person is clean.

429
00:19:23,596 --> 00:19:26,366
You can drop the victimized
society girl routine.

430
00:19:26,499 --> 00:19:28,401
You're an accomplice
in your own abduction.

431
00:19:28,535 --> 00:19:30,203
WILLIARD LUXLEY: Just what
are you talking about, Pig?

432
00:19:30,337 --> 00:19:31,738
Financial records
gave me the name

433
00:19:31,871 --> 00:19:34,173
of the college that Francine
attended four years ago.

434
00:19:34,307 --> 00:19:36,976
You attended at the
exact same time, Luxley.

435
00:19:37,109 --> 00:19:39,646
My hunch is that you two know
each other and are an item.

436
00:19:42,382 --> 00:19:44,384
I applaud your ingenuity.

437
00:19:44,517 --> 00:19:47,254
See, I loathe my
father, and now, I'll

438
00:19:47,387 --> 00:19:50,723
escape from under his fascist
thumb, along with my lover,

439
00:19:50,857 --> 00:19:55,027
my comrades, and $1 million.

440
00:19:55,161 --> 00:19:56,563
Perfect plan, Francine.

441
00:19:56,696 --> 00:20:01,234
And once we're safely
away, I'll kill you myself.

442
00:20:01,368 --> 00:20:03,870
You'd kill me for a briefcase
full of shredded paper?

443
00:20:04,003 --> 00:20:06,939
[clatters]

444
00:20:09,309 --> 00:20:12,745
There's nothing
but confetti in here.

445
00:20:12,879 --> 00:20:15,782
[glass shattering]

446
00:20:17,684 --> 00:20:18,618
Surprise.

447
00:20:18,751 --> 00:20:19,952
Party's over, Crumb Cakes.

448
00:20:20,086 --> 00:20:21,621
And just who are you, man?

449
00:20:21,754 --> 00:20:22,689
Yes, sucker.

450
00:20:22,822 --> 00:20:23,590
And why are you smiling?

451
00:20:23,723 --> 00:20:24,891
Why?

452
00:20:25,024 --> 00:20:26,593
Because I'm trigger
happy, that's why.

453
00:20:26,726 --> 00:20:29,529
You're dead, man.

454
00:20:29,662 --> 00:20:30,730
You may be right.

455
00:20:30,863 --> 00:20:32,064
All right, let's
get this over with.

456
00:20:32,198 --> 00:20:34,100
I got an aerobics
class in the morning.

457
00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:37,036
[gunshot]

458
00:20:38,338 --> 00:20:40,740
You just ruined my
best sports jacket.

459
00:20:40,873 --> 00:20:42,642
Now, I'm really mad.

460
00:20:42,775 --> 00:20:45,778
[gunshot]

461
00:20:47,747 --> 00:20:50,750
[dramatic music, gunshots]

462
00:21:12,405 --> 00:21:14,040
You know, I almost forgot I
had a grenade in my pocket.

463
00:21:16,776 --> 00:21:19,612
Lucky this jacket didn't
go to the cleaners.

464
00:21:19,746 --> 00:21:21,614
[intense tune]

465
00:21:21,748 --> 00:21:24,684
[clanging]

466
00:21:26,453 --> 00:21:28,955
[loud bang]

467
00:21:32,124 --> 00:21:34,461
Three down, one to go.

468
00:21:34,594 --> 00:21:37,364
[men groaning]

469
00:21:41,601 --> 00:21:43,536
You deserve a good
spanking, girlie.

470
00:21:43,670 --> 00:21:46,038
Drop the gun or
this broad gets it.

471
00:21:46,172 --> 00:21:47,374
Please, be my guest.

472
00:21:47,507 --> 00:21:48,808
Go ahead, kill her.

473
00:21:48,941 --> 00:21:51,010
And then I'll just go
ahead and kill you.

474
00:21:51,143 --> 00:21:52,345
She's serious, Hammer.

475
00:21:52,479 --> 00:21:53,880
I'm sure she is, Dori.

476
00:21:54,013 --> 00:21:56,048
And as a policewoman, I
know you're prepared to die

477
00:21:56,182 --> 00:21:57,149
in the line of duty.

478
00:22:03,356 --> 00:22:05,392
All right, stud,
it's just you and me.

479
00:22:05,525 --> 00:22:06,826
Now, drop the gun this instant.

480
00:22:06,959 --> 00:22:09,496
I know you'd never
shoot at a woman.

481
00:22:09,629 --> 00:22:10,497
[gunshot]

482
00:22:10,630 --> 00:22:11,731
[whimpers]

483
00:22:11,864 --> 00:22:13,566
Sorry, Francine.

484
00:22:13,700 --> 00:22:15,001
Call me a feminist.

485
00:22:18,938 --> 00:22:20,507
Does that hurt?

486
00:22:20,640 --> 00:22:23,676
Anytime a really nice sports
jacket gets ruined, it hurts.

487
00:22:23,810 --> 00:22:25,378
Thank goodness you
followed me here.

488
00:22:25,512 --> 00:22:26,846
No, don't thank goodness.

489
00:22:26,979 --> 00:22:27,980
Thank gun.

490
00:22:32,284 --> 00:22:35,054
Thanks, Sledge.

491
00:22:35,187 --> 00:22:36,255
Enough warmth.

492
00:22:36,389 --> 00:22:39,358
[laughter]

493
00:22:41,293 --> 00:22:45,832
My own daughter, just
like her mother, an idiot.

494
00:22:45,965 --> 00:22:49,368
Nevertheless,
Doreau, congratulations

495
00:22:49,502 --> 00:22:51,037
on a job well done.

496
00:22:51,170 --> 00:22:53,740
Thank you, sir, but I can't
take all the credit myself.

497
00:22:53,873 --> 00:22:55,842
Yeah, you can.

498
00:22:55,975 --> 00:22:57,844
Detective Doreau,
in a few moments,

499
00:22:57,977 --> 00:22:59,378
it'll be my great
pleasure to present

500
00:22:59,512 --> 00:23:01,714
you with a full promotion.

501
00:23:01,848 --> 00:23:03,049
That's not fair.

502
00:23:03,182 --> 00:23:04,851
Oh, stop worrying
about Hammer.

503
00:23:04,984 --> 00:23:06,919
Concern yourself
with your own career.

504
00:23:07,053 --> 00:23:08,187
Thank you, sir.

505
00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:10,623
I respectfully
decline the promotion.

506
00:23:10,757 --> 00:23:11,691
What?

507
00:23:11,824 --> 00:23:14,894
Am I hearing correctly?

508
00:23:15,027 --> 00:23:17,897
[gunshot]

509
00:23:18,030 --> 00:23:19,466
Seems like you're
hearing pretty well.

510
00:23:22,068 --> 00:23:23,202
Let's go, partner.

511
00:23:23,335 --> 00:23:26,639
Doreau, you're
off your rocker.

512
00:23:26,773 --> 00:23:30,543
True, but I know
what I'm doing.

513
00:23:30,677 --> 00:23:32,479
[light music]

514
00:23:33,946 --> 00:23:35,782
[laughter]

515
00:23:39,686 --> 00:23:42,755
[theme music]