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[Jesse Frederick singing
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"Everywhere You Look"]
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♪ Ah ah ah ♪
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♪ Ah ♪
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♪ Whatever happened
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to predictability ♪
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♪ The milkman
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the paper boy ♪
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♪ Evening TV ♪
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♪ Did I get
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delivered here ♪
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♪ Somebody tell me please ♪
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♪ This old world's
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confusing me ♪
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♪ Clouds as mean
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as you've ever seen ♪
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♪ There ain't a bird
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who knows your tune ♪
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♪ Then a little voice
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inside you whispers ♪
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♪ Kid don't sell
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your dreams so soon ♪
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♪ Everywhere you look ♪
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♪ Everywhere you look ♪
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♪ There's a heart ♪
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♪ There's a heart ♪
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♪ A hand to hold on to ♪
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♪ Everywhere you look ♪
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♪ Everywhere you look ♪
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♪ There's a face ♪
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♪ Of somebody who needs you ♪
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♪ Everywhere you look ♪
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♪ When you're lost out there ♪
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♪ And you're all alone ♪
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♪ A light is waiting
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to carry you home ♪
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♪ Everywhere you look ♪
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♪ Everywhere you look ♪
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♪ Ah ah ah ♪
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♪ Doobie doo
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bah bah dah ♪♪
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[Stacey Q singing "Don't Make
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A Fool Of Yourself"]
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♪ Wait a minute baby ♪
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♪ If you're walkin'
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out the door ♪
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♪ You better look
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before you leap boy ♪
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♪ Don't be comin' back
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for more ♪
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Ow!
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♪ Listen to me baby ♪
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♪ It's important that you
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try and understand ♪
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♪ I am not a fighter ♪
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♪ I'm a lover
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I'll do anything.. ♪♪
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[laughing]
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Oh, like you never do this.
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Not like that.
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Check it out, D.J.,
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I'm out of school tomorrow.
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Really?
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"Please excuse Kimmy
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from school.
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"Our family rabbit
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is having bunnies
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"and we want Kimmy
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to share the miracle."
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Your mother wrote this?
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Nah! My parents are in Vegas.
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My big brother wrote it.
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It cost me 20 bucks
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but I got the money
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from his wallet.
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[chuckles]
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So, this means you can
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go to the Minimall
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and get Stacey Q's autograph.
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(in unison)
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Stacey Q! She's so rad!
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Hi. What are you doing?
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What are you talking about?
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Can I play?
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Hello?
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Hello?
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Steph, let me
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explain this one more time.
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Your world is down here.
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Our world is up here.
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Okay, now can I play?
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Girls, come on down
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and say goodbye!
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Okay, here's a few phone numbers
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you might need
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while I'm down in LA.
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"Uh, pediatrician,
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grandma
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"police, fire department
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"the other grandma
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"uh, poison control, dentist."
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You left off the White House
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and the Equalizer.
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Okay. Maybe I'm overreacting.
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It's just that it's
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my first night
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away from the girls overnight.
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(D.J.)
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Bye, dad!
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- Bye.
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- Bye. We'll miss you!
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Aw, I'm going to miss my girls.
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Hmm.
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I'll miss you.
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I'll miss you.
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I'll miss you.
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I'll miss you.
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Daddy, take it easy.
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You're hugging
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other people's kids.
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Sorry, Kimmy.
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Now, you all know
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that while I'm gone
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Uncle Jesse and Joey,
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they're gonna be in charge.
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So, you'll be on
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your best behavior, right?
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We won't let you down, dad.
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Come on, girls.
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Time for bed.
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- Let's go.
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- Let's go, girls.
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(Jesse)
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Steph, let's go, come on.
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Uncle Jesse, can I stay up
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15 extra minutes?
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Absolutely not.
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Buh-bye, honey.
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Uh, dad, before you go
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you wouldn't mind
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if I got an autograph
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of my favorite singer,
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Stacey Q, would ya?
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No. Not at all.
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Great! You're the best dad.
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Just sign this note excusing
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me from school tomorrow
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and have a wonderful trip.
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Nice try, D.J.
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Oh, come on, dad. You just said
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I could have the autograph.
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I'd only be missing
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one day of school.
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I'm sorry.
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I'll make it up.
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I'll go to school on Christmas.
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D.J., we all have our jobs.
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My job is to go to LA
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and cover a surfing competition.
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Your job is to go to school.
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Kimmy gets to go.
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Why can't I?
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Because you're not Kimmy.
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I don't know why
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Kimmy's missing school
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but there's a lot
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of things about Kimmy
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that I don't understand.
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If I don't get
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this autograph, I'll die.
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D.J., no one has ever died
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from lack of autograph.
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I really got to go,
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now, come on
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give your father a big hug.
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Goodbye, father.
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Come here, daughter.
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Give your dad a hug.
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Have a good time.
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(Danny)
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'See you tomorrow afternoon.'
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Sorry, D.J.
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This isn't over yet.
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[instrumental music]
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Alright.
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♪ Searchin' for my woman
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I went to Carolina ♪
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♪ I followed her to China ♪
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♪ And I still
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couldn't find her ♪
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♪ I heard
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she moved to Cleveland ♪
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♪ I got there she was leavin' ♪
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♪ I was odd she was even ♪
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♪ Boy did it snow.. ♪♪
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Ugh. God, that's horrible.
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I loved it.
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Really?
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I could be wrong.
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I think you're so talented.
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You're charming,
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good-looking, funny.
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Great head of hair.
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Okay, what do you want?
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By the way,
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whatever it is, you got it.
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Can I interview you?
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I have an essay to do
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on the person I admire most.
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And, of course, I picked you.
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Well, yes.
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Yes. Sure.
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Okay. Here. Sit.
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Go. Be. Do.
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Well, it-it, uh, it all
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started about a 150 years ago
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with my
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great-great-grandfather Spiro.
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Uncle Jesse, let's
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skip ahead to your life.
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I bet you were pretty wild
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as a little kid, huh?
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Oh! D.J., you might say
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I was a rebel munchkin.
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[chuckles]
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In fact, you know,
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my coloring book
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I used to color
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on the outside of the lines
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on purpose.
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Hmm. You were bad.
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You bet.
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I bet you got away
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with all kinds of stuff.
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You probably ditched
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school a lot, huh?
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Well, not a lot,
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but once in a while.
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Not that I'm proud of it
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but I was the best, not that
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I'm proud of that either.
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I remember this one time that
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I'm particularly not proud of.
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I was dying to see
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the Rolling Stones'
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farewell concert.
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It was either their fifth
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or sixth. It was their sixth.
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Uh, get to the ditching
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part, please.
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Oh, sure, well,
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what happened was
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I just ran
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the basic sick scam.
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You know, I mean,
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uh, I-I said I had a fever
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and cold hands and red eyes
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and, of course,
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those 2 magical words.
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I'm sick.
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Wait, wait, wait, slow down,
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I can't write that fast.
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Oh, I'm sorry. That's
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I'm si-i-i-i-i-ck. Five I's.
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I'm si.. There you go.
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Okay, uh, see, meantime
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I tell my mom, you know,
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I really want to go to school
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but she calls me in sick anyway.
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So then how'd
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you go to the concert?
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Tut-tut-tut.
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Here comes the genius
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of your Uncle J.
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What I did was ten minutes later
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I convinced my mom
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that I'm all better
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so she sends me to school.
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And since she already
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called the school..
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They weren't expecting me.
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...and you were free
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to get the autograph
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I mean, go to the concert.
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Thanks, Uncle Jesse.
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Sure. Anyway,
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after the concert..
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Whoa, whoa, whoa!
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What is this? That's-that's
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the end of the interview?
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Oh. Uh, no. Uh, what's
292
00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:40,687
your favorite color?
293
00:08:40,728 --> 00:08:41,813
Black.
294
00:08:41,855 --> 00:08:43,106
Thank you.
295
00:08:43,148 --> 00:08:46,193
[instrumental music]
296
00:08:48,945 --> 00:08:50,113
[sniffs]
297
00:08:50,947 --> 00:08:52,032
[sniffs]
298
00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:53,908
[sniffs]
299
00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:55,743
Ugh!
300
00:08:55,785 --> 00:08:57,496
[sighs]
301
00:08:57,537 --> 00:09:00,540
Hundred and six. Hospital.
302
00:09:04,627 --> 00:09:07,172
Hundred and four. Doctor.
303
00:09:09,883 --> 00:09:11,218
Hundred and one.
304
00:09:11,259 --> 00:09:13,345
Out of school.
305
00:09:23,522 --> 00:09:25,482
Oh-h-h.
306
00:09:27,484 --> 00:09:28,735
What's wrong?
307
00:09:28,776 --> 00:09:32,113
I'm si-i-i-i-i-ck.
308
00:09:40,163 --> 00:09:42,957
Poor baby.
309
00:09:42,999 --> 00:09:44,418
I'll get Joey.
310
00:09:44,459 --> 00:09:47,921
You just need some
311
00:09:44,459 --> 00:09:47,921
peace and quiet.
312
00:09:47,962 --> 00:09:50,590
Joey, get in here!
313
00:09:47,962 --> 00:09:50,590
Get in here!
314
00:09:51,632 --> 00:09:53,134
What is it?
315
00:09:51,632 --> 00:09:53,134
What's wrong?
316
00:09:53,176 --> 00:09:55,720
She's si-i-i-i-i-ck.
317
00:09:55,762 --> 00:09:57,722
I'll get you
318
00:09:55,762 --> 00:09:57,722
some juice, D.J.
319
00:09:57,764 --> 00:10:01,017
I wish I could get you
320
00:09:57,764 --> 00:10:01,017
Stacey Q's autograph.
321
00:10:02,936 --> 00:10:05,272
D.J., you're burning up.
322
00:10:06,814 --> 00:10:08,983
You have a fever. 101.
323
00:10:09,025 --> 00:10:12,362
A 101? Let me see.
324
00:10:12,404 --> 00:10:14,822
D.J., your hands
325
00:10:12,404 --> 00:10:14,822
feel like icicles.
326
00:10:17,158 --> 00:10:18,659
They do.
327
00:10:18,701 --> 00:10:21,121
But, Joey, I have
328
00:10:18,701 --> 00:10:21,121
to go to school today.
329
00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:24,624
There's a big test
330
00:10:21,162 --> 00:10:24,624
on C-C-Canada.
331
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:28,128
You want to go to school?
332
00:10:28,169 --> 00:10:31,005
You must be really sick.
333
00:10:31,047 --> 00:10:32,757
I'm calling school right now.
334
00:10:32,799 --> 00:10:34,842
Oh-h-h.
335
00:10:37,304 --> 00:10:39,013
I am so rad.
336
00:10:41,849 --> 00:10:44,018
Michelle, you're doing
337
00:10:41,849 --> 00:10:44,018
a great job.
338
00:10:45,562 --> 00:10:47,814
Yeah. Tomorrow I'm going
339
00:10:45,562 --> 00:10:47,814
to show you how to vacuum.
340
00:10:49,690 --> 00:10:50,900
Hi, Joey.
341
00:10:50,942 --> 00:10:51,985
What are you doing out of bed?
342
00:10:52,026 --> 00:10:53,736
My hands are warm,
343
00:10:52,026 --> 00:10:53,736
my head's cold.
344
00:10:53,778 --> 00:10:54,779
I can go to school.
345
00:10:54,821 --> 00:10:56,448
Freeze!
346
00:10:57,073 --> 00:10:59,618
[imitates siren]
347
00:11:02,203 --> 00:11:03,622
Move it.
348
00:11:04,789 --> 00:11:07,667
I need to see
349
00:11:04,789 --> 00:11:07,667
your license, registration
350
00:11:07,708 --> 00:11:09,461
and forehead.
351
00:11:09,503 --> 00:11:11,630
You feel fine.
352
00:11:09,503 --> 00:11:11,630
How can that possibly be?
353
00:11:12,589 --> 00:11:13,965
It's a miracle.
354
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:16,384
No, the miracle would be
355
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:16,384
is if I fell for this.
356
00:11:16,426 --> 00:11:18,136
I know exactly what's going on.
357
00:11:19,095 --> 00:11:20,763
Oh, no. You do?
358
00:11:20,805 --> 00:11:23,475
What do you think,
359
00:11:20,805 --> 00:11:23,475
I'm an idiot?
360
00:11:26,311 --> 00:11:28,771
It's pretty obvious to me,
361
00:11:26,311 --> 00:11:28,771
you felt so guilty
362
00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:30,940
about getting out of that test
363
00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:30,940
with that phony sick bit
364
00:11:30,982 --> 00:11:34,402
that you finally broke down
365
00:11:30,982 --> 00:11:34,402
and decided to go to school.
366
00:11:34,444 --> 00:11:36,279
That's exactly right.
367
00:11:36,321 --> 00:11:38,239
Boy, I can't fool you.
368
00:11:38,281 --> 00:11:40,116
No, you really can't, Deej.
369
00:11:40,158 --> 00:11:43,036
'You're a classy kid.
370
00:11:40,158 --> 00:11:43,036
I'm proud of you.'
371
00:11:43,077 --> 00:11:47,040
Uh, right. Well, I'm off
372
00:11:43,077 --> 00:11:47,040
to school to take that test.
373
00:11:47,081 --> 00:11:49,584
[chuckles]
374
00:11:47,081 --> 00:11:49,584
No speeding.
375
00:11:51,670 --> 00:11:54,673
Michelle, your daddy
376
00:11:51,670 --> 00:11:54,673
is gonna be very happy
377
00:11:54,713 --> 00:11:57,133
when he sees the way
378
00:11:54,713 --> 00:11:57,133
that I'm handling things.
379
00:11:57,175 --> 00:11:58,885
'Here you go.'
380
00:12:01,555 --> 00:12:04,932
No, Michelle.
381
00:12:01,555 --> 00:12:04,932
I wash, you dry.
382
00:12:07,686 --> 00:12:08,687
We gotta to be cool.
383
00:12:08,727 --> 00:12:10,146
Hi.
384
00:12:10,188 --> 00:12:12,357
(in unison)
385
00:12:10,188 --> 00:12:12,357
She's so rad!
386
00:12:12,399 --> 00:12:13,650
Thanks for coming down.
387
00:12:13,692 --> 00:12:15,193
You're welcome, Ms. Q.
388
00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:17,820
Stacey. Who should
389
00:12:15,235 --> 00:12:17,820
I make these out to?
390
00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:21,782
I'm Kimmy. Two Ms,
391
00:12:17,862 --> 00:12:21,782
a "Y", an "I", and a "K"
392
00:12:21,824 --> 00:12:23,451
but not in that order.
393
00:12:25,203 --> 00:12:27,539
And you can make mine to D.J.
394
00:12:27,581 --> 00:12:30,458
the girl who's
395
00:12:27,581 --> 00:12:30,458
like a sister to me
396
00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:32,835
who I'll take to
397
00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:32,835
the Grammy Awards.
398
00:12:34,504 --> 00:12:36,423
Or just to D.J.
399
00:12:37,591 --> 00:12:41,052
Here you go, girls.
400
00:12:37,591 --> 00:12:41,052
See you soon.
401
00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:43,096
- She wants to be our friend.
402
00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:43,096
- Yes!
403
00:12:43,137 --> 00:12:44,472
- Look at this.
404
00:12:43,137 --> 00:12:44,472
- Oh, man.
405
00:12:44,514 --> 00:12:47,766
[indistinct chatter]
406
00:12:47,808 --> 00:12:49,768
Oh! It's Joey!
407
00:12:47,808 --> 00:12:49,768
Oh! Run! Hide, hide!
408
00:12:49,810 --> 00:12:51,605
Go in there.
409
00:12:51,646 --> 00:12:54,023
[Michelle cooing]
410
00:12:54,065 --> 00:12:55,650
What's the matter?
411
00:12:54,065 --> 00:12:55,650
You want down?
412
00:12:55,692 --> 00:12:58,445
Huh? Okay.
413
00:13:00,739 --> 00:13:02,574
Don't buy too many Chipmunk CDs.
414
00:13:02,616 --> 00:13:03,950
[chuckles]
415
00:13:05,159 --> 00:13:06,369
(Michelle)
416
00:13:05,159 --> 00:13:06,369
'Oh.'
417
00:13:10,540 --> 00:13:12,875
No, no, no.
418
00:13:12,917 --> 00:13:16,045
Go back to Joey.
419
00:13:12,917 --> 00:13:16,045
No. Go away! Shoo!
420
00:13:16,087 --> 00:13:17,505
'Go. Go.'
421
00:13:19,507 --> 00:13:21,384
Go get Benny.
422
00:13:19,507 --> 00:13:21,384
Take it to Joey.
423
00:13:21,426 --> 00:13:25,054
Go get Benny. Go pick up
424
00:13:21,426 --> 00:13:25,054
Benny. Take it to Joey.
425
00:13:25,096 --> 00:13:27,766
Good, good.
426
00:13:25,096 --> 00:13:27,766
Now, go take it to Joey.
427
00:13:27,806 --> 00:13:30,268
'He's over there. Go, go.'
428
00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:32,186
'Take it to Joey.'
429
00:13:32,228 --> 00:13:35,482
I don't believe it.
430
00:13:32,228 --> 00:13:35,482
I taught her this game.
431
00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:37,776
Come here, Michelle. Come here.
432
00:13:38,735 --> 00:13:39,860
Can you save my place?
433
00:13:39,902 --> 00:13:41,404
I got to get my baby. Huh.
434
00:13:41,446 --> 00:13:42,781
My little baby.
435
00:13:42,821 --> 00:13:45,492
[chuckles]
436
00:13:42,821 --> 00:13:45,492
It's not really even my baby.
437
00:13:45,533 --> 00:13:47,744
You don't care, do you?
438
00:13:50,246 --> 00:13:52,915
Go find Joey.
439
00:13:53,750 --> 00:13:55,960
You found Joey.
440
00:13:56,002 --> 00:13:57,337
D.J?
441
00:13:57,378 --> 00:13:59,339
What are you doing here?
442
00:13:59,380 --> 00:14:01,633
Getting busted.
443
00:14:01,675 --> 00:14:02,841
What are you doing here?
444
00:14:02,883 --> 00:14:04,803
I was so impressed
445
00:14:02,883 --> 00:14:04,803
with your honesty
446
00:14:04,843 --> 00:14:07,972
that I decided to came down
447
00:14:04,843 --> 00:14:07,972
here and get you an autograph.
448
00:14:08,014 --> 00:14:09,557
(Joey)
449
00:14:08,014 --> 00:14:09,557
'D.J., this is not cool.'
450
00:14:10,308 --> 00:14:11,685
I trusted you.
451
00:14:12,519 --> 00:14:15,396
Give me that autograph.
452
00:14:19,150 --> 00:14:21,902
Come on. Let's go.
453
00:14:19,150 --> 00:14:21,902
We're going home.
454
00:14:24,322 --> 00:14:25,865
This is so humiliating.
455
00:14:25,906 --> 00:14:28,034
[Stacey Q singing "Don't Make
456
00:14:25,906 --> 00:14:28,034
A Fool Of Yourself"]
457
00:14:28,075 --> 00:14:30,161
♪ Don't you understand ♪
458
00:14:28,075 --> 00:14:30,161
♪ Take my ♪♪
459
00:14:32,622 --> 00:14:34,541
You know, Michelle, it's
460
00:14:32,622 --> 00:14:34,541
a shame kids have to grow up.
461
00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:38,002
Why can't they stay
462
00:14:34,582 --> 00:14:38,002
like you, so sweet, so innocent?
463
00:14:38,837 --> 00:14:40,380
'So ladylike.'
464
00:14:41,422 --> 00:14:42,965
'Yeah.'
465
00:14:45,009 --> 00:14:47,345
Joey, what's the emergency?
466
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:50,431
D.J. cut school to get
467
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:50,431
Stacey Q's autograph.
468
00:14:50,473 --> 00:14:52,851
I left work early for that?
469
00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:54,394
Joseph, do you realize
470
00:14:54,435 --> 00:14:56,646
I was this close
471
00:14:54,435 --> 00:14:56,646
to finally figuring out
472
00:14:56,688 --> 00:14:59,148
where that line of ants
473
00:14:56,688 --> 00:14:59,148
actually begins?
474
00:15:00,316 --> 00:15:01,901
How you doing, kid?
475
00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:04,863
She did more than
476
00:15:03,069 --> 00:15:04,863
cut school, Jess.
477
00:15:04,904 --> 00:15:07,114
She completely faked me out.
478
00:15:07,156 --> 00:15:09,283
You? No!
479
00:15:11,077 --> 00:15:12,453
[chuckles]
480
00:15:14,748 --> 00:15:17,751
Jesse, this plan was diabolical.
481
00:15:17,792 --> 00:15:20,044
She faked the flu.
482
00:15:17,792 --> 00:15:20,044
I called in sick for her.
483
00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:21,212
Then boom, she's better.
484
00:15:21,254 --> 00:15:23,214
She takes off just like that.
485
00:15:23,256 --> 00:15:26,509
The conniving little sneak.
486
00:15:26,551 --> 00:15:29,763
Oh, Joey, she's
487
00:15:26,551 --> 00:15:29,763
not a conniving little sneak.
488
00:15:29,804 --> 00:15:31,723
I gave her that plan.
489
00:15:31,765 --> 00:15:33,307
You what?
490
00:15:33,349 --> 00:15:35,602
Well, she was, uh,
491
00:15:33,349 --> 00:15:35,602
interviewing me for her essay
492
00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:37,270
on the person she admires most.
493
00:15:37,311 --> 00:15:38,688
[chuckles]
494
00:15:42,233 --> 00:15:45,069
There's no essay.
495
00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:47,655
That conniving little sneak.
496
00:15:47,697 --> 00:15:48,865
Danny's gone.
497
00:15:47,697 --> 00:15:48,865
We're in charge.
498
00:15:48,907 --> 00:15:50,116
Now, what are we gonna to do?
499
00:15:50,157 --> 00:15:52,326
- Well, let's think about this.
500
00:15:50,157 --> 00:15:52,326
- Hmm.
501
00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:54,871
See, when I was
502
00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:54,871
a kid and I got in trouble
503
00:15:54,913 --> 00:15:56,581
my dad showed me no mercy.
504
00:15:56,623 --> 00:15:58,708
In fact, he took
505
00:15:56,623 --> 00:15:58,708
so many privileges away
506
00:15:58,750 --> 00:16:00,585
that to this day
507
00:15:58,750 --> 00:16:00,585
when I go visit my parents
508
00:16:00,627 --> 00:16:03,630
I gotta go straight
509
00:16:00,627 --> 00:16:03,630
to my room, no TV, no dinner.
510
00:16:04,839 --> 00:16:05,840
Well, whenever I was bad
511
00:16:05,882 --> 00:16:07,258
my dad would sit me down
512
00:16:07,300 --> 00:16:09,385
talk about right
513
00:16:07,300 --> 00:16:09,385
and wrong and good and bad
514
00:16:09,427 --> 00:16:11,596
for hours and hours on and on
515
00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:14,766
until finally I beat
516
00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:14,766
the hell out of myself.
517
00:16:16,684 --> 00:16:18,352
The worst part,
518
00:16:16,684 --> 00:16:18,352
though, the worst part
519
00:16:18,394 --> 00:16:20,563
was when my dad
520
00:16:18,394 --> 00:16:20,563
gave me the dad face.
521
00:16:20,605 --> 00:16:23,441
You know, it was like like this.
522
00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:25,610
Ooh. The dad face.
523
00:16:25,652 --> 00:16:29,530
- That's good. Let me try it.
524
00:16:25,652 --> 00:16:29,530
- Alright.
525
00:16:29,572 --> 00:16:33,576
No, no, no, Joey. That's
526
00:16:29,572 --> 00:16:33,576
the I just ate bad chili face.
527
00:16:38,205 --> 00:16:40,040
You don't have to do that.
528
00:16:40,082 --> 00:16:42,209
I feel bad enough.
529
00:16:42,251 --> 00:16:45,129
I'm really sorry.
530
00:16:42,251 --> 00:16:45,129
I totally blew it.
531
00:16:45,171 --> 00:16:48,675
I'll never do anything
532
00:16:45,171 --> 00:16:48,675
like this again.
533
00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:51,761
Regardless...but
534
00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:51,761
Joseph and I must deal
535
00:16:51,803 --> 00:16:54,555
with your misconduct,
536
00:16:51,803 --> 00:16:54,555
young lady.
537
00:16:54,597 --> 00:16:55,890
Misconduct?
538
00:16:56,808 --> 00:16:58,184
Young lady?
539
00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:02,021
I really am
540
00:16:59,352 --> 00:17:02,021
turning into my father.
541
00:17:03,523 --> 00:17:05,566
If I start wearing
542
00:17:03,523 --> 00:17:05,566
a while belt and shoes to match
543
00:17:05,608 --> 00:17:07,861
throw me down
544
00:17:05,608 --> 00:17:07,861
the stairs, will you?
545
00:17:08,695 --> 00:17:09,988
I'd be honored.
546
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:12,406
D.J., we're going
547
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:12,406
to have to punish you.
548
00:17:12,448 --> 00:17:15,201
So no TV for two weeks.
549
00:17:15,242 --> 00:17:16,995
What you call
550
00:17:15,242 --> 00:17:16,995
that punishment?
551
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:19,998
No TV, no music
552
00:17:17,036 --> 00:17:19,998
for two weeks.
553
00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:23,793
Oh, yeah? I see your no TV
554
00:17:20,039 --> 00:17:23,793
and no music for two weeks
555
00:17:23,835 --> 00:17:27,087
and I raise you,
556
00:17:23,835 --> 00:17:27,087
no friends over for a month.
557
00:17:28,172 --> 00:17:29,799
I call.
558
00:17:29,841 --> 00:17:32,593
No TV, music and no friends
559
00:17:29,841 --> 00:17:32,593
over for a month.
560
00:17:32,635 --> 00:17:34,929
Are we agreed, young lady?
561
00:17:34,971 --> 00:17:37,557
Sure. I deserve to be punished.
562
00:17:37,598 --> 00:17:40,601
Dad trusted me
563
00:17:37,598 --> 00:17:40,601
and I let him down.
564
00:17:40,643 --> 00:17:42,562
I hate myself.
565
00:17:44,647 --> 00:17:46,649
Excuse us.
566
00:17:48,275 --> 00:17:50,319
Listen, man, I think
567
00:17:48,275 --> 00:17:50,319
the kid is sorry.
568
00:17:50,361 --> 00:17:51,946
I mean, she's been punished
569
00:17:51,988 --> 00:17:54,949
I think when
570
00:17:51,988 --> 00:17:54,949
Danny comes back from LA
571
00:17:54,991 --> 00:17:57,243
maybe we shouldn't
572
00:17:54,991 --> 00:17:57,243
tell him about this.
573
00:17:57,284 --> 00:17:59,286
Don't you think he has a right
574
00:17:57,284 --> 00:17:59,286
to know exactly what happened?
575
00:17:59,328 --> 00:18:00,705
Yes, I do, but I don't
576
00:17:59,328 --> 00:18:00,705
want him to think
577
00:18:00,747 --> 00:18:02,206
we can't take care of the girls.
578
00:18:02,248 --> 00:18:04,333
You're absolutely right.
579
00:18:02,248 --> 00:18:04,333
I forgot about that.
580
00:18:04,375 --> 00:18:05,752
He may never
581
00:18:04,375 --> 00:18:05,752
want to leave the house again.
582
00:18:05,793 --> 00:18:06,836
Now you're thinkin'.
583
00:18:06,878 --> 00:18:08,629
Alright, D.J.
584
00:18:08,671 --> 00:18:11,382
we're not going
585
00:18:08,671 --> 00:18:11,382
to tell your dad what happened.
586
00:18:11,424 --> 00:18:13,467
Well, alright.
587
00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:17,638
Oh, thank you,
588
00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:17,638
thank you, thank you.
589
00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:20,433
"The bunny and the ducky
590
00:18:17,680 --> 00:18:20,433
and the turtle and the frog
591
00:18:20,474 --> 00:18:22,560
"all rode home on a rainbow
592
00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:25,145
"and smiled for
593
00:18:22,602 --> 00:18:25,145
the rest of their lives."
594
00:18:25,980 --> 00:18:27,189
I love this story.
595
00:18:27,231 --> 00:18:29,191
- Yeah. See?
596
00:18:27,231 --> 00:18:29,191
- Uh.
597
00:18:29,233 --> 00:18:30,359
Yeah.
598
00:18:35,531 --> 00:18:37,658
Cowabunga, dudes!
599
00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:38,826
Hi, dad.
600
00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:39,994
- 'Hey, Danny.'
601
00:18:38,868 --> 00:18:39,994
- 'Hey!'
602
00:18:40,036 --> 00:18:42,789
Aw, I missed
603
00:18:40,036 --> 00:18:42,789
my little dudettes.
604
00:18:44,874 --> 00:18:47,085
Let me dudette again.
605
00:18:48,711 --> 00:18:50,838
LA claims another victim.
606
00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:52,966
[laughing]
607
00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:52,966
How did everything go here?
608
00:18:53,007 --> 00:18:55,676
- 'Good.'
609
00:18:53,007 --> 00:18:55,676
- Great. Yeah. It's fine.
610
00:18:55,718 --> 00:18:57,219
Hi, daddy!
611
00:18:57,261 --> 00:18:58,387
Hi.
612
00:18:59,513 --> 00:19:01,766
D.J., you look so much better.
613
00:19:05,144 --> 00:19:07,438
You look so much better?
614
00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:10,357
Um...yeah. I got my hair done.
615
00:19:11,067 --> 00:19:13,319
You got gypped.
616
00:19:15,488 --> 00:19:17,782
I thought you were sick.
617
00:19:17,824 --> 00:19:20,701
Right. Sick of this hairstyle.
618
00:19:20,743 --> 00:19:21,786
That's good.
619
00:19:21,828 --> 00:19:24,580
Steph, walk with me.
620
00:19:21,828 --> 00:19:24,580
Talk with me.
621
00:19:24,622 --> 00:19:27,207
[clears throat]
622
00:19:24,622 --> 00:19:27,207
Listen, how 'bout
623
00:19:24,622 --> 00:19:27,207
if we play a little game
624
00:19:27,249 --> 00:19:29,627
entitled let's not
625
00:19:27,249 --> 00:19:29,627
talk about D.J., okay?
626
00:19:29,669 --> 00:19:30,670
- Okay.
627
00:19:29,669 --> 00:19:30,670
- Good.
628
00:19:30,711 --> 00:19:31,879
Anybody want to play
629
00:19:31,921 --> 00:19:33,881
Let's not talk about D.J?
630
00:19:35,257 --> 00:19:36,843
See? Now you've lost the game.
631
00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:39,470
Your punishment is
632
00:19:38,177 --> 00:19:39,470
that you have to go into
633
00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:42,807
the kitchen and,
634
00:19:39,512 --> 00:19:42,807
um, and cook us dinner.
635
00:19:42,849 --> 00:19:44,391
I don't know how to cook.
636
00:19:44,433 --> 00:19:46,268
Polish the silver.
637
00:19:47,394 --> 00:19:49,563
Why are we not
638
00:19:47,394 --> 00:19:49,563
talking about D.J?
639
00:19:50,648 --> 00:19:53,026
Was D.J. sick this morning?
640
00:19:53,067 --> 00:19:54,944
Well, she was a little
641
00:19:53,067 --> 00:19:54,944
under the weather.
642
00:19:54,986 --> 00:19:57,030
But, uh, we got
643
00:19:54,986 --> 00:19:57,030
her right back up on her feet
644
00:19:57,071 --> 00:19:58,698
and shipped her
645
00:19:57,071 --> 00:19:58,698
right back off to school.
646
00:19:58,739 --> 00:20:00,741
Exactly, see, it was hardly
647
00:19:58,739 --> 00:20:00,741
worth mentioning
648
00:20:00,783 --> 00:20:04,078
so we didn't mention it,
649
00:20:00,783 --> 00:20:04,078
everything is great.
650
00:20:04,120 --> 00:20:05,329
Oh. Well, good.
651
00:20:05,371 --> 00:20:07,540
D.J., since you missed
652
00:20:05,371 --> 00:20:07,540
school today
653
00:20:07,581 --> 00:20:11,002
your teacher asked me to
654
00:20:07,581 --> 00:20:11,002
give you your homework.
655
00:20:21,012 --> 00:20:23,514
Thank you so much.
656
00:20:23,556 --> 00:20:26,308
You're welcome.
657
00:20:26,350 --> 00:20:29,436
(Joey)
658
00:20:26,350 --> 00:20:29,436
'Ooh, now, see, that's
659
00:20:26,350 --> 00:20:29,436
a good dad face right there.'
660
00:20:31,647 --> 00:20:33,524
[sighs]
661
00:20:31,647 --> 00:20:33,524
Donna Jo?
662
00:20:34,901 --> 00:20:36,069
I tricked Uncle Jesse
663
00:20:36,110 --> 00:20:37,737
into teaching
664
00:20:36,110 --> 00:20:37,737
me how to fool Joey
665
00:20:37,778 --> 00:20:39,113
into thinking I was sick
666
00:20:39,155 --> 00:20:41,866
so I could cut school
667
00:20:39,155 --> 00:20:41,866
to get that autograph.
668
00:20:41,908 --> 00:20:45,452
But then Michelle busted
669
00:20:41,908 --> 00:20:45,452
me and Joey took me home..
670
00:20:45,494 --> 00:20:47,205
...on a leash.
671
00:20:48,330 --> 00:20:52,877
You liar! You made
672
00:20:48,330 --> 00:20:52,877
me a liar, too.
673
00:20:52,919 --> 00:20:56,714
I lied to Joey, to your
674
00:20:52,919 --> 00:20:56,714
teacher and everybody.
675
00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:59,258
I thought I knew you,
676
00:20:56,756 --> 00:20:59,258
but I don't.
677
00:21:00,467 --> 00:21:03,512
I share my rinse cup
678
00:21:00,467 --> 00:21:03,512
with a stranger.
679
00:21:04,180 --> 00:21:05,347
Stephanie.
680
00:21:05,389 --> 00:21:07,725
I even made you a get-well card.
681
00:21:08,893 --> 00:21:11,353
Here. Get well.
682
00:21:13,606 --> 00:21:16,567
D.J., go wait for me upstairs.
683
00:21:16,609 --> 00:21:18,569
You know, Joey, I starting
684
00:21:16,609 --> 00:21:18,569
to feel a little hungry.
685
00:21:18,611 --> 00:21:20,863
- Yeah, me, too.
686
00:21:18,611 --> 00:21:20,863
- Guys, come back here.
687
00:21:20,905 --> 00:21:23,365
- Actually, I'm not that hungry.
688
00:21:20,905 --> 00:21:23,365
- No, me, either.
689
00:21:25,118 --> 00:21:28,037
I want to know everything that
690
00:21:25,118 --> 00:21:28,037
goes on in my daughters' lives.
691
00:21:28,079 --> 00:21:29,747
Look, I don't expect
692
00:21:28,079 --> 00:21:29,747
you to be perfect parents
693
00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:31,916
but I do expect
694
00:21:29,789 --> 00:21:31,916
you to be honest.
695
00:21:31,958 --> 00:21:34,210
I don't know why,
696
00:21:31,958 --> 00:21:34,210
I don't know why
697
00:21:34,252 --> 00:21:36,754
I don't know why I'm wagging
698
00:21:34,252 --> 00:21:36,754
my finger at you like this.
699
00:21:39,257 --> 00:21:42,593
Look, I don't want
700
00:21:39,257 --> 00:21:42,593
to lecture you guys.
701
00:21:42,635 --> 00:21:45,263
I'd be lost here without you.
702
00:21:45,304 --> 00:21:47,140
But did you have to lie to me?
703
00:21:47,181 --> 00:21:48,975
We just didn't want you to think
704
00:21:47,181 --> 00:21:48,975
that we couldn't handle things
705
00:21:49,016 --> 00:21:50,017
while you were gone.
706
00:21:50,059 --> 00:21:51,060
Yeah, see, we wanted you to know
707
00:21:51,102 --> 00:21:52,061
you could go away and everything
708
00:21:52,103 --> 00:21:53,687
would be cool with your kids.
709
00:21:53,729 --> 00:21:54,939
(Joey)
710
00:21:53,729 --> 00:21:54,939
'And if there's ever a problem'
711
00:21:54,981 --> 00:21:56,732
we should get it
712
00:21:54,981 --> 00:21:56,732
right out in the open.
713
00:21:56,774 --> 00:21:59,735
That's right that we should work
714
00:21:56,774 --> 00:21:59,735
things out together as a family.
715
00:21:59,777 --> 00:22:02,362
In fact, Joey,
716
00:21:59,777 --> 00:22:02,362
say you're sorry and mean it.
717
00:22:02,404 --> 00:22:03,990
I'm sorry. Now you say it.
718
00:22:04,031 --> 00:22:05,950
- Okay. I'm sorry. Okay?
719
00:22:04,031 --> 00:22:05,950
- Okay.
720
00:22:05,992 --> 00:22:07,660
Thanks for the talk.
721
00:22:09,745 --> 00:22:10,788
Steph, what are you doing?
722
00:22:10,830 --> 00:22:13,040
I'm making a get sick card.
723
00:22:14,541 --> 00:22:16,169
I said I was sorry.
724
00:22:17,336 --> 00:22:19,297
Uh-oh. Lecture time.
725
00:22:19,338 --> 00:22:20,714
See ya.
726
00:22:20,756 --> 00:22:23,217
Steph, I think you should stay.
727
00:22:23,259 --> 00:22:25,261
Why do I get a lecture?
728
00:22:25,303 --> 00:22:27,263
I didn't do anything.
729
00:22:27,305 --> 00:22:29,974
But you will,
730
00:22:27,305 --> 00:22:29,974
so take accurate notes.
731
00:22:31,433 --> 00:22:34,103
D.J., come over here.
732
00:22:36,438 --> 00:22:39,233
Why did you do
733
00:22:36,438 --> 00:22:39,233
what you did today?
734
00:22:39,275 --> 00:22:42,569
Because I wanted that autograph
735
00:22:39,275 --> 00:22:42,569
more than anything.
736
00:22:44,113 --> 00:22:47,158
Do you know what the worst part
737
00:22:44,113 --> 00:22:47,158
is about what you did?
738
00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:48,993
That I cut school?
739
00:22:49,035 --> 00:22:50,703
No.
740
00:22:50,744 --> 00:22:53,247
That you tricked Stephanie?
741
00:22:55,499 --> 00:22:58,460
[sighs]
742
00:22:55,499 --> 00:22:58,460
That you were selfish.
743
00:22:58,502 --> 00:23:01,214
All you cared about was D.J.
744
00:23:01,255 --> 00:23:05,176
You did whatever you had to do
745
00:23:01,255 --> 00:23:05,176
to get D.J. what she wanted.
746
00:23:05,218 --> 00:23:08,554
Even if it meant lying
747
00:23:05,218 --> 00:23:08,554
and hurting other people.
748
00:23:10,306 --> 00:23:12,474
I don't wanna be selfish
749
00:23:12,516 --> 00:23:15,686
and I don't wanna hurt
750
00:23:12,516 --> 00:23:15,686
other people's feelings.
751
00:23:15,728 --> 00:23:17,395
I know you don't.
752
00:23:17,437 --> 00:23:20,358
I-I think you really care
753
00:23:17,437 --> 00:23:20,358
about other people.
754
00:23:22,651 --> 00:23:24,402
I'm really sorry, dad.
755
00:23:25,863 --> 00:23:29,242
Well, I know next time
756
00:23:25,863 --> 00:23:29,242
you'll think things through
757
00:23:29,283 --> 00:23:31,077
a lot more carefully
758
00:23:31,118 --> 00:23:34,121
'cause you're a lot better
759
00:23:31,118 --> 00:23:34,121
than what I saw today.
760
00:23:36,456 --> 00:23:38,167
Come here.
761
00:23:39,585 --> 00:23:42,462
Daddy, am I your favorite now?
762
00:23:45,423 --> 00:23:47,009
- Yes.
763
00:23:45,423 --> 00:23:47,009
- Hey!
764
00:23:47,051 --> 00:23:50,596
[laughing]
765
00:23:47,051 --> 00:23:50,596
No, no, no.
766
00:23:50,637 --> 00:23:51,722
No matter what happens
767
00:23:51,764 --> 00:23:52,765
I'm always gonna love all
768
00:23:52,806 --> 00:23:55,268
three of you exactly the same.
769
00:23:55,309 --> 00:23:57,061
Oh, alright.
770
00:23:58,604 --> 00:24:01,648
[chuckles]
771
00:23:58,604 --> 00:24:01,648
I wish Michelle was here.
772
00:24:01,690 --> 00:24:02,900
I like her the best.
773
00:24:02,942 --> 00:24:04,442
- H-hey!
774
00:24:02,942 --> 00:24:04,442
- Hey!
775
00:24:04,484 --> 00:24:07,071
[instrumental music]
776
00:24:11,825 --> 00:24:14,620
[theme music]