Alright, guys.
What do you wanna
eat this morning?
[snoring]
How about the
grand slob breakfast?
Yeah, and it's moon-side up.
Well, he's obviously
had a rough night.
I say we wake him gently.
[clanging]
[imitating Popeye]
Oh, ring my bell, Olive.
[snores]
Let me try.
[imitating Bugs Bunny]
Uh, what's up, doc?
[imitating Yosemite Sam]
Whoa, I hate that rabbit.
Well, if I get my hands on him
'I'll-I'll, uh..'
What are you guys
doing in my bedroom?
Joey, we eat here.
I can't even put my elbows
on the table.
Oh.
Well, for your information
I've-I've been up
all night inventing.
Funny. I would've
guessed bingeing.
Oh, scoff if you like,
using my own ingredients
I've combined the old-world
charm of silly putty
with the whimsical innocence
of play-dough.
I give you...silly dough.
I give you a coupon
for shock therapy.
Come on, boys, you can
be my official product testers.
What do we have to do?
Just play with this stuff.
I like this job.
Now watch 'em close.
We don't want a big mess.
Oh, I'll keep an eye on em'.
I was talking to Nicky and Alex.
Come on, boys, throw
your heads back and laugh.
- Ha!
- Ha.
Ha.
♪ Aah ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Everywhere ♪
♪ There's a heart ♪
♪ A hand to hold onto ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Everywhere ♪
♪ There's a face ♪
♪ Of somebody who needs you ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ When you're lost out there ♪
♪ And you're all alone ♪
♪ A light is waitin'
to carry you home ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Do-be-do-ba-ba-da ♪♪
[instrumental music]
What are you making
for breakfast, dad?
Something to go, kids.
We're running late.
But I want Belgian waffles,
apple-smoked bacon
and sourdough toast,
lightly buttered.
Yeah, and I want straight A's
world peace and Brad Pitt
lightly buttered.
No buttered bread,
and definitely no buttered Brad.
We've got time for anything
you can stick
your finger through.
Ladies.
Tomorrow I'm gonna get up early
and cook my own breakfast.
Wait a minute.
I don't even know how to cook.
Oh, Michelle, I'll
teach you how to cook.
Oh, that's sweet, honey.
But who's going to teach you?
[giggles]
Come on, stop teasing me.
I'm a good cook.
Remember that sausage and lima
bean casserole I made?
I called it my Sunday surprise.
We called it
our Monday surprise.
I was still getting
surprised on Tuesday.
Well, I bet you won't be
getting surprised tonight.
- Ow! Whoa!
- Oh.
Oh, check, please.
Michelle, what do you say?
You and me after school
making dinner.
I'm there.
And we're late.
Come on, bring your bagels.
We'll eat in the car.
Oh-oh-oh.
Bagel crumbs..
better bring my bagel buster.
Well, you guys
just wait till dinner.
I'm gonna make you all eat crow.
That's what I'm afraid of.
Ah, finally
some peace and quiet.
- D.J.!
- Aah!
Hmm.
I don't remember
that ugly throw rug being there.
Hi. Kimmy, I have a great idea
for our senior class prank.
- I'm all ears.
- Actually, you're all mouth.
Okay, here goes.
We print up our own school
newspaper
with fake stories and switch it
with the real one.
We have a school newspaper?
Of course. Where do you get
your information?
The bathroom wall.
How's this for a headline?
"Principal Robolard
sent to his own office
for Xeroxing his butt."
That's about as exciting
as fat-free gravy.
Uncle Jesse, what do you think
of my idea?
Well, it's, uh, cute.
I guess when I went to Bayview
we were a little more
outrageous, you know.
One year we stole
Robolard's toupee
and we ran up the flagpole.
That morning, everyone said
"I pledged allegiance
to the rug."
[chuckles]
They said we weren't doing this.
We go like that.
[laughs]
Hair boy pulled the hair heist?
That prank is legendary.
Uncle Jesse, how'd you
get that wig off his head?
Fishing pole, chewing gum,
and a freeway overpass.
Let's just say when Robolard
went under in his convertible
his hair was
the catch of the day.
Can you believe he still
has that thing?
Well, you'd know why
if you saw him without it.
This guy's so bald it looks like
his neck is blowing a bubble.
Ha ha ha!
I meant the car.
Hm-mmm.
Yeah. 1957 Chevy.
That thing's a classic.
We got to top this prank.
I wanna leave more
behind at Bayview
than a D average and a locker
full of odor eaters.
Kimmy, if I tried to pull
a prank like uncle Jesse's
I'd be a nervous wreck.
Robolard said if he catches
anyone, they won't graduate.
It'll make you blow
your whole college career.
Well, DJ, I have an idea.
Don't get caught.
Deej, no one ever gets caught.
Robolard is completely clueless.
Now, all I am saying is,
if you're gonna to do a prank
make sure it's outrageous
and make sure
it's something that people
will remember.
Come on, Deej. Listen
to uncle Brylcreem.
Straight A's last a semester
but a good prank
lives on forever.
[instrumental music]
Okay, Michelle,
now grandma's meatloaf
was always everybody's
favorite.
So all we have to do
is follow the recipe exactly.
Let's start
with the seasonings.
"Several smidgens of ketchup."
What's a smidgen?
A smidgen?
Well, that's, uh..
...that's about the size
of a small pigeon.
Okay, what's next?
"A dollop of mustard."
A dollop.
H-How much is in a dollop?
I don't know.
A bunch of smidgens?
Works for me.
[clears throat]
Okay what have you got now?
"A smattering of egg
and an inkling of onion."
Let me see that.
"A sprinkling of parsley.
Season to taste."
Taste like what?
Who could tell
from this recipe?
Deej, meet the answer
to our prayers.
Apparently we had
a bad connection.
No, Deej. My sweety Duane just
got a big plumbing job
at the construction site
next to the school.
Oh, Wow, Duane. That's a lot
of toilets to install.
You must be really excited.
Whatever.
Duane can operate
that big crane.
Right, sweetheart?
Uh, Whatever.
Duane, is that all
you say, "Whatever?"
I guess.
Deej, don't you get it?
For our prank, we can hoist
old Robolard himself
up the flagpole.
Kimmy, the idea
of the prank is not to let
Robolard know who's doing it.
I mean, he might
get suspicious when he sees us
putting a big hook
in his pants.
Are you gonna be a wimp
your whole life?
Don't you wanna do
something wild
and unforgettable
like your Uncle Jesse?
- Of course, but--
- Well, we have a crane.
We have Duane.
We have your brain.
Hey, that almost rhymes.
Ha! I guess.
Come on, Deej.
This could be a classic.
A classic?
That gives me an idea.
[rattling]
Okay, Duane, a little
to the left!
'The left!'
Your left!
The hot water side!
[crowd applauding]
'Good. Now ease it down gently.'
[crowd cheering]
Yes, oh!
What I would give
to see Robolard's face tonight
when he gets back
from the away game.
Yeah.
And his precious car's missing
from its covered parking spot.
This is the senior prank
no one will forget.
What about your Uncle Jesse's?
Uncle who?
Whew.
Well, what do you think?
You're a good cook, mama.
Yeah. Who knew?
Beck, that was really delicious.
I--I'm amazed. Who knew?
Should I consider that
an apology or a compliment?
- Both.
- Thanks.
Whew, man, am I bloated.
That is about a four-notcher
on the old belt.
Let me tell you.
Should I consider that
an apology or a compliment?
You should consider that
a reason to stay single.
Do we have enough left for DJ?
Oh, I don't think
she'll go hungry.
Beck, that's not a meatloaf.
Th-that's a meat-mountain.
Well I forgot to take
into consideration
that grandma's recipe was
for the whole trailer park.
Anyone else want
a piece of the rock?
- No, no
- No, thank you.
[barks]
Oh, well, I think
that we can spare a little.
Will you be eating that here,
or would you like a doggie bag?
Hey, Beck, listen,
since I teased you so much
about your cooking,
I volunteer to do the dishes.
Oh, thanks, honey.
That's really sweet of you.
- You are. You're very sweet.
- That's is very sweet.
Wait, wait. I wasn't
the only one who teased her.
How about some
other volunteers, please?
Hey! Hey, boys. Boys.
How about a hand?
[clapping]
Gentlemen, gentlemen,
that's an old joke.
New to us.
[laughing]
Uncle Jesse, we did it.
We pulled off
the greatest prank ever.
Yeah, this is way better
than your toupee on a stick.
Well, I way doubt that.
But let's hear it.
We got a crane
and lifted Robolard's car
onto the roof of the school.
I always knew one day
some crazy devil-may-care maniac
would surpass my prank.
I'm proud to call
that maniac my niece.
Hug me.
Uncle Jesse,
it was unbelievable.
Robolard is gonna freak out.
Do you think Duane will talk?
He doesn't even talk to me.
What a prank.
It was unbelievable.
It was outrageous.
Everything went off perfectly.
It's a good thing you guys got
that prank done in time.
Looks like it's gonna pour
any minute out there.
Oh, my gosh.
Kimmy, Robolard's car's
on the roof.
I know. I can't
get over it either.
With the top down.
Kimmy, the interior's
gonna be destroyed.
This prank is turning out
to be great.
Kimmy, the idea
of the prank was not
to ruin his car,
just ruin his day.
Well, we've got to get back
there and put the top up.
Wait. We-we can't.
It's an automatic top.
And we'd need the keys.
We're dead.
Well, maybe not yet,
you know what
I can hot-wire the car,
but we got to hurry.
Great.
How did you learn
how to hot-wire a car?
Uh, science project.
[thunder]
Uncle Jesse, hurry up.
I-I think I felt a raindrop.
Just one minute here.
Let me just..
[engine rumbling]
There it is.
Ha! Kid's still got it.
Thanks, Uncle Jesse.
I'm sorry I ever did this.
Hey, hey, hey!
The security guard's coming.
Now I'm really sorry.
Wh-what are we gonna do?
You guys Hide. I'll take care
of the security guard.
- What about you?
- Don't worry about me.
If you get caught,
you're not gonna graduate.
You won't be gettin' a college.
Now go hide.
Hey, what's going on out here?
What the..
What are you doing there?
Uh, well, I got tired,
so I pulled over.
Oh. Okay.
So, get some rest.
Okay. Thanks.
What? Wait a minute.
This is Principal
Robolard's car.
Uh, so it is. So it is.
Yeah, oh, you know.
That's right. I forgot.
I parked mine on top of the gym.
Well, listen, Have a nice night.
Looks like rain. We'll see you
Hold it. You're coming with me.
Come on, it was just
a little prank.
Where's your sense of humor?
Apparently you had it surgically
removed at a young age.
Kimmy, this whole thing
was our idea.
We can't let Uncle Jesse
take the blame for it.
Well, he doesn't want you
to take the blame.
You'll be kicked out of school.
You won't go to college.
Everything you've ever worked
for will go down the drain.
What are they gonna do to him?
Shave his head,
toss him in the clink
and make him listen
to his own singing.
Poor sap. Oh, well,
let's go grab a burger.
[instrumental music]
Becky, I can't believe
how good that dinner was.
If there was an Oscar
for cooking
I think you'd win
best performance by a loaf.
[laughs]
You're very kind.
I'd like to thank
all the little people.
That would be me.
Dad, I think Comet's sick.
- What makes you say that?
- Oh, I don't know.
Something about the way he just
tossed his biscuits
all over the rose bush.
- You okay, fella?
- He was fine at dinner.
I mean, he really
wolfed down that meatloaf.
The meatloaf.
Hey, there's nothing
wrong with that meatloaf.
It just won an Oscar.
Oh, no, Comet drinks out
of the toilet.
If the meatloaf's
making him sick
it's gonna kill us.
You know what? I'm, uh..
...I'm actually starting
to feel little queasy myself.
Yeah. I feel
like I swallowed a brick.
My stomach's getting all gurgly.
Oh, Come on, you guys.
This is totally psychosomatic.
- It's all in your heads.
- Yeah, for now it is.
But pretty soon it's gonna be
all over that rose bush.
Mom, we feel bad.
Psychosomatic, huh?
Nicky, Alex,
do your tummies hurt?
No.
Well, then what's wrong?
Someone took all
our silly dough.
They did?
This is all that's left.
Let me see that.
Well, there are
teeth marks all over it
and slobber..
...and a blond hair.
Joey.
A-ha. Blue teeth.
Blue paws.
Well, either Comet ate
the silly dough
or he's been out
chasing Smurfs.
Is he gonna be okay?
Comet's gonna be just fine.
Silly dough is non-toxic
and 100% natural.
Huh? Come here, boy. Yeah.
Yeah. See that? He's starting
to feel better already.
Ooh, you could use
a little doggie mint.
Peeyoo!
Come on, Comet.
And you guys were worried
about the meatloaf.
Uh, dad, you were the one
who said you felt queasy.
Yeah, but you know what it was..
I think it was
that game of sorry.
Th-the tension,
it was gut-wrenching.
How come everybody else
felt sick?
Well, sometimes your mind
can play tricks on you.
And if you believe
something strong enough
you can make it happen.
- Cool.
- What cool?
I believe you're
gonna raise my allowance.
This thing is ludicrous.
It's a travesty.
Just, uh, raise your hand
when I get to a word
"You recognize."
That's him, Mr. Robolard.
You!
Me.
Jesse Katsopolis.
What a long overdue pleasure.
Robolardo.
I mean, Mr. Robolard.
Long time no see.
Hm. Uh..
Not since the flagpole
incident, I believe.
I-I-I don't know
what you're talking about.
I think you do.
And This time I got you.
You put my car on the roof.
Come on, Robolard,
it was a joke.
What're you gonna do,
call my parents
put me on detention,
make me write 500 times
"I will not put
a car on the roof?"
See you, Robo.
Uh, uh, but-but, Mr. Katsopolis
the only way you're leaving here
is in the back of a police car.
Police? Why?
Um, trespassing,
breaking-and-entering
uh, grand theft auto.
Ha!
I didn't thieve it.
I just lifted it.
Okay, grand lift auto.
Either way, you're going
where you belong
Uh, excuse me, Mr. Robolard.
D.J. Tanner, what are
you doing here?
Mr. Robolard, th-this whole
thing was my stupid idea.
I'm the one who put your car
on the roof.
No, no, no.
That didn't happen.
She-she's just a wacky,
crazy, college-bound student
who's trying to ruin her future
before she even gets there.
Go ahead, I'm to blame.
1-800-book-him. Go ahead.
Uncle Jesse, it's okay.
It's my responsibility.
Oh, Deej, come on. Please.
Even Robolard doesn't believe
you'd do something that crazy.
Mr. Robolard, why would
I be here in your office
at night if I weren't
involved in this?
Uh, see, she's taking
this remedial, uh, shop class
with old three fingers Magee.
Mr. Katsopolis, that class
is no longer offered at night
and since you left school,
it's two fingers Magee.
Guess he never got
the hang of the jigsaw.
D.J., I still can't believe
you're involved
in a prank like this.
Well, she isn't.
This is all my fault, okay.
I kept pushing her and goading
her to do something outrageous.
I mean, if it was up to her,
she would've just said
you Xeroxed your butt.
Look, I'm responsible
here, okay.
So call the police,
go ahead, book me.
I'll see you
on visitor's day. Come on.
No. look, the truth
is Mr. Robolard
the only reason my uncle's here
was to help me.
I mean, if it weren't for him
the rain would've
ruined your car.
That's how we got the top up,
he hot-wired the ignition.
- It's a science project.
- Oh.
So if anyone should be punished,
it should be me.
D.J., you had
such a bright future.
Why'd you do it?
Because...I wanted
to leave a legacy
you know,
do something outrageous.
I guess for once in my life
I just wanted to show everyone
that I had guts.
Well, you did, Deej.
Coming in here,
sticking up for me
takin' the responsibility
that's about as gutsy
as it gets.
And as brilliant.
That was the best prank
in the history of the school.
Really?
I thought you hated
senior pranks.
Well, the kids
expect me to say that.
I mean, what good is a prank
if you think
the principal approves?
So I'm not in trouble?
No.
Uh, as long as you keep
a straight face tomorrow
when I chew out
the senior class
for this heinous
and outrageous crime
against authority.
- Deal.
- Uh, uh, hold it a second here.
Now, how come when you thought
I did the prank you were gonna
send me to jail?
- Well, there's a good reason.
- Oh, yeah, what's that?
- I never liked you.
- See. He never..
Why?
'Cause you had
the hair I wanted
since I was
a balding boy scout.
And your hair's
even gotten better
while I've been
stuck with this.
Oh, my..
It's a wig.
Mr. Robolard, it wasn't D.J.
who did this.
Kimmy, you-you don't
have to take the rap for this.
I'm not. I have
the culprit right here.
Duane?
Whatever.
[theme music]
♪ Aah aah aah aah ♪