[instrumental music]
"And Cinderella and
the handsome prince
lived happily ever after."
Wasn't that a nice story?
Again.
Again?
Okay.
"Once upon a time, Cinderella
lost a shoe, found a shoe
and lived happily ever after."
Bad story.
Again.
Pretty smart for
somebody who drools.
"Once upon a time,
in a faraway land
"there lived a girl
named Ella who was both
kind and very beautiful."
[theme music]
♪ Ah ah ah ah ♪
♪ Ah ♪
♪ Whatever happened
to predictability ♪
♪ The milkman the paper boy ♪
♪ Evenin' TV ♪
♪ When did I get
to livin' here ♪
♪ Somebody tell me please ♪
♪ This old worlds
confusing me ♪
♪ Clouds as mean
as you've ever seen ♪
♪ Ain't a bird who
knows your tune ♪
♪ Then a little voice
inside you whispers ♪
♪ Kid don't sell
your dreams so soon ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ There's a heart ♪
♪ A hand to hold onto ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ There's a face
of somebody who needs you ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ When you're lost out there
and you're all alone ♪
♪ A light is waiting
to carry you home ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Ah ah ah ah ♪
♪ Shooby do ba botta ♪♪
[instrumental music]
Stephanie, what're
you doing?
I'm looking for the giant
glow-in-the-dark dinosaur.
You know dad's rule.
Never put your arm into
somebody else's breakfast.
Uh-oh.
He escaped.
Cowabunga, beach bunnies.
Alright.
Surf's up, dude.
Hi, daddy.
[chuckles]
I cannot believe
The Beach Boys
are gonna be on
my show today.
I am stoked.
Whatever that means.
You like The Beach Boys.
I like The Beach Boys.
We both like
the same group?
I must be getting old.
♪ Let's go surfin' now ♪
♪ Everybody's learning how ♪
(in chorus)
♪ Come on a safari with me ♪
(in chorus)
♪ Come on a safari with me ♪
♪ Surfin' safari ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ Yeah me ♪
♪ Surfin' safari ♪
♪ Surfin'.. ♪♪
Boy, we're mediocre.
Good morning, girls.
- Good morning.
- Morning.
Hold it.
Steph, what're you doing?
Looking for a dinosaur.
Check the Flintstone vitamins.
Danny, thanks again
for inviting me and
Jess to meet
The Beach Boys.
Are you kidding?
Joey, remember the
first time we ever
heard The Beach Boys?
- Tried to become surfers.
- What a disaster.
Who knew ironing boards
didn't float?
I remember the first time
I heard "Good Vibrations".
I was in the first grade.
Turned to my date,
and said, "Have mercy."
What the heck is this?
That can't be my giant
glow-in-the-dark dinosaur.
It looks more
like a dino-shrimp.
[instrumental music]
- 'Thirty seconds, Danny.'
- Guys, hang in there.
The Beach Boys will
be on in the next segment.
Alright, go get 'em.
Jess, I've a crazy idea.
No.
You know our jingle
for Beach Butter suntan lotion
- we've been tryin' to sell?
- Oh, sure.
♪ Beach Butter ♪
♪ Butter your butt ♪♪
- Yeah, I know the one.
- Yeah.
Well, suntan lotion,
The Beach Boys
our Beach Butter jingle.
Gettin' any connection here?
Joseph, these guys
are legends, man.
We can't ask The Beach Boys
to sing a measly jingle.
- It wouldn't hurt to ask.
- Wrong.
You ask,
and I'll hurt you.
Welcome back. I am stoked.
Whatever that means.
Well, according to our schedule,
my co-host Rebecca
is walking down the hall with
The Beach Boys as we speak.
And now,
I'm getting a note.
And now,
I'm getting a migraine.
Oh, uh, The Beach Boys' plane
can't land due to fog.
But hey, I promised
you'd hear "Good Vibrations"
and I never break a promise.
- Oh, no, he wouldn't.
- He shouldn't.
♪ I'm pickin' up
good vibrations ♪
♪ She's givin' me excitations ♪
And the second guy goes..
♪ Good good good ♪
♪ Good vibrations ♪
And the third guy goes..
♪ Good good good ♪
♪ Good vibrations ♪
And the fourth guy goes..
♪ Nana nana na nana na ♪
The machine goes..
♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh ♪♪
Okay.
Great. Oh..
Hi, Mr. Tanner,
ironing your tie again?
- Is D.J. home?
- She's doing her homework.
But I'm sure you'll put
an end to that.
Tough break about
The Beach Boys not showing up.
I guess they had
something better to do.
You ever hear
of fog, Gibbler?
Danny, where's the radio at?
Quick, turn it on.
They're playing our jingle.
Shh. Here we go.
Here we go.
(man on radio)
'From a waffle to a falafel,
you can get it all at Beenos.'
- Here it comes.
- Shh.
♪ Eat at Beenos ♪♪
That's it?
I can't believe it.
They chopped our jingle
to shreds.
It's supposed to go..
(in chorus)
♪ Eat at Beenos today ♪♪
Those butchers.
(male on radio)
'Okay, it's time
for our big contest'
where you can win a dream night
with The Beach Boys.'
Whoa, whoa, fellas.
(man on radio)
'Including two
front row seats'
'for tomorrow
night's concert.'
'Just be our seventh caller,
and name The Beach Boys hit.'
No, wait.
It's the seventh caller.
Hello, you're the third caller.
Hello, you're the fourth caller.
Give me that.
Oh, D.J.
Uh, sorry.
D.J. was on the phone.
Gotta get that kid
her own line, folks.
(male on radio)
'Okay, we have a seventh caller,
what's your name?'
(D.J. on radio)
'D.J. Tanner.'
(all)
D.J.?
- D.J., you're on the radio.
- I know, I know, be quiet.
- 'Pardon me?'
- Not you.
(male on radio)
'Okay, D.J. Tanner, for that
dream night with The Beach Boys'
'can you name this hit song?'
["Help me Rhonda" on radio]
(all)
"Help me Rhonda"
Uh...the name
of the song is..
Help me, Gibbler.
(all)
Help me, Gibbler?
(male on radio)
'Could you repeat
that answer, please?'
- What did I just say?
- You said, "Help me, Gibbler."
Uh, I think
what I said was
"Help me.."
(all)
Rhonda!
- Rhonda?
- 'That's right.'
(male on radio)
'"Help me, Rhonda."'
[all cheering]
'D.J. Tanner, you're going to be
picked up in a limousine'
'by The Beach Boys themselves.'
- Oh, yes.
- Yeah.
(male on radio)
'You'll travel with them
to their sold out concert.'
Oh, thank you.
Thank you. Thank you.
Alright, a night with
rock 'n roll royalty, folks.
And another chance to
pitch 'em Beach Butter.
Maybe I can get 'em
back on my show.
(male on radio)
'Have you thought about who
you'll be bringing with you to'
'share this once in a lifetime
night with The Beach Boys?'
[clearing throat]
(male on radio)
'I'll bet everyone in
San Francisco would love to go.'
'But remember, you can only
bring one lucky guest.'
Only one?
Me. Me
[instrumental music]
Cheeseburgers for breakfast?
Hey, I can scramble yours
if you like.
I know what he's up to.
He's making D.J.'s
favorite food to butter her up
so she'll take him to
The Beach Boy concert.
Joseph, you're a disgrace.
Uncle Jesse, thanks for making
a tape of my favorite songs.
One disgrace burger.
Hey, I had an extra tape
and five hours to kill.
Cheeseburgers for breakfast?
Nice touch, Joey.
Any fries?
I bet I know
who wants a plate
of my mom's
double fudge brownies.
I do. I do.
Dream on, squirt.
These are for D.J. from her best
friend Kimmy...with love.
If you think she's gonna pick
you over her own sister
then you haven't seen how
I made her bed this morning.
Guys, enough of this.
D.J. is not gonna make
her choice based on bribes
or special treatment.
That's not how I
raised my daughter.
My first born.
Now, tell everybody
who you're picking.
- Yeah, come on. Here we go.
- Okay, here it goes.
I pick..
Boy, I'd hate to see this end.
I wish I could
take all of you.
But since I can't, I pick..
- Uncle Jesse.
- Oh, yeah.
Have mercy.
Thank you, thank you.
- Hey, congratulations.
- Congratulations.
- Alright, thanks.
- Way to go.
Well, what a surprise.
- Have a great time, Jess.
- Thanks.
I'll bring you guys
back T-shirts and stuff.
- 'Yeah.'
- 'Two T-shirts.'
Oh, Michelle.
That's so abstract.
So surreal.
- Pretty.
- 'Pretty?'
Yes, that too.
But, honey,
the secret to great art
is to keep all the paint
on the paper.
Dad, is this a good
outfit for tonight?
Oh, yeah,
that's beautiful, honey.
You're gonna
have a great time.
- I can't wait.
- Uh, D.J., hold on.
Um, just outta curiosity.
How come you picked Uncle Jesse
to go with you tonight?
Because he loves The Beach Boys,
and he's a musician.
Oh. Well..
That makes sense.
I mean, dad, you're
a talk show host.
If I won a night
with Oprah Winfrey
I would definitely pick you.
Well, thanks,
but I like music too.
Just 'cause I'm not
in a band.
I mean...I grew up
with The Beach Boys.
But, hey, it's,
it's no big deal.
Dad, you don't
feel bad, do you?
No, no, it's no problem.
After all, I got to go with
you, and see "Smurfs On Ice."
Go ahead.
Go, get dressed.
Okay, dad.
Pretty.
Oh, no, Michelle.
Honey, on the paper.
On the paper.
Daddy pretty.
Oh, no, Michelle.
Can you say dry cleaner?
Say dry cleaner.
Jess, picture it.
You and D.J., sitting in
a limo with The Beach Boys
you just happen to have
a tape of our awesome
totally tubular, gnarly,
Beach Butter jingle, dude.
A, don't call me dude.
B, it's a dumb idea,
and two, I don't have a tape.
Check your pocket.
How do you do that?
Never mind.
Just think about it.
Okay.
Get out.
You need to mellow down, dude.
I'm serious, man.
I said, can you..
Hi, how are you? Come in.
Jesse, look at this.
An original Michelle Tanner.
One day, this will be hanging in
the Metropolitan Museum of Art.
On their refrigerator.
Oh, great,
you're both here.
I forgot I promised Kimmy
we'd go ice skating.
So, dad, I want you
to go with Uncle Jesse
to The Beach Boys tonight.
Have a great time.
D.J.
What was that all about?
Oh, maybe she thinks
she hurt my feelings
when she picked you to go
instead of her own father.
Did she hurt your feelings?
Well, maybe a little.
I just thought she'd
wanna go with her dad.
But I guess I can't compete
with Uncle Rock 'n Roll.
What're you saying here?
You're saying that, that
you're jealous of me?
If anybody should be jealous,
it should be me jealous of you.
That makes no sense.
You have something going with
these girls I'll never have.
I mean, like Stephanie.
When she made her first
ceramic handprint
who did she give it to?
Dad.
And, and what was Michelle's
very first word?
- Cookie.
- After cookie.
She looked up to you,
and said, "Dadda."
And D.J., when
she gets married
who's gonna march her
down the aisle?
- Dad.
- That's right, dad.
See? There's three good
reasons why I envy you.
I just hope one day,
I'm lucky enough
to have kids that love me as
much as those girls love you.
They do worship me,
don't they?
[sighs]
Jesse...thanks for
reminding me how lucky I am.
You're gonna...
hug me, aren't you?
- You leave me no choice.
- Oh, gee.
D.J., look.
I'm sorry I put you
in a tough spot.
Picking Uncle Jesse was fine.
You two should just go,
and have a great time.
But The Beach Boys
mean a lot to you.
I want you to go.
D.J., I've changed
my mind about The Beach Boys.
I want you to go
with your father.
- I'm not going.
- Well, I'm not going.
This concert was
supposed to be fun.
Now, everybody's either
hurt or disappointed.
It's just not worth it.
- I'm not going.
- I'll go.
You'll go where?
To see The Beach Boys.
Wanna be my date?
What're you wearing?
We should coordinate.
Hold it.
D.J. is going.
I said I'm not going.
Well, if you're not going,
then, no one is going.
[indistinct arguing]
[telephone ringing]
Hello?
Excuse me.
I'm on the phone.
No.
Bye.
- Who was it?
- Some beach boy.
He called from a limo
right in our driveway.
I told him no one was going.
- Wait.
- Hold it!
(D.J.)
Wait. Wait. Wait.
Did I miss something?
- Catch him.
- Hold it!
Wait.
(all)
Okay.
Hey, you're The Beach Boys.
Come on in.
Would you mind
wiping your feet first?
- Thanks. I got a clean rug.
- Hey, Dr. Love.
- Hi.
- Hey.
- Hi, Brian.
- Hey, nice to see you.
- Hi. Hi.
Wow, you're Al,
you're Bruce, you're Brian
you're Carl, you're Mike.
- Hey, Bruce.
- How're you guys doing?
- Hey, Mike.
- Love your music.
Is there a D.J. Tanner here?
Yeah, that's me.
Hi.
We hear you're not
coming to the concert.
Bon Jovi in town?
- No, it's a long story.
- Well, we've got time.
They never start
the show without us.
Let's order
a vegetarian pizza.
Hey, who are these guys?
Uh, Stephanie, I'd like
to introduce to you
the legendary Beach Boys.
Big boys.
Cute kid.
♪ Aruba Jamaica ooo
I wanna take you ♪
♪ To Bermuda Bahama
come on pretty mama ♪
♪ Key Largo Montego
baby why don't we go ♪
♪ Ooo I wanna take you
down to Kokomo ♪
♪ We'll get there fast and
then we'll take it slow ♪
♪ That's where
we wanna go ♪
♪ Way down to Kokomo ♪♪
- Yeah.
- Alright.
[all cheering]
- Good.
- Hey.
Man, this is great.
Hanging out with The Beach boys.
Singing, eating pizza.
You guys wanna come up,
and see my room?
What am I saying?
- Jess, come here for a minute.
- Oh, okay.
Excuse me, uh, Beach Boys.
This is our big chance.
They're at our house.
- Give 'em our tape.
- That's a good point, Joseph.
They're cool guys, they're
hanging out, eating pizza.
- I'm gonna give it a shot.
- Go, get 'em, partner.
- I don't have the tape.
- Check your pocket.
How do you do that?
Thanks, it's really been
a great evening.
And for once, nobody
bugged us to listen
to some song
they've written.
I hate when
that happens, Mike.
Okay, D.J., who's
coming with you?
Uh, well.
- Beach Boy huddle.
- Ho.
Come on.
♪ Turu rururoo turururu ♪♪
Well, we talked it over
and we'd like all of
you to be our guests.
- Alright.
Thanks, Bruce.
- Hey.
- Thank you.
Thank you so much.
Kokomo.
A request.
♪ Aruba Jamaica ooo
I wanna take you ♪
♪ Bermuda Bahama
come on pretty mama ♪
♪ Key Largo Montego
baby why don't we go ♪
♪ Ooo I wanna take you
down to Kokomo ♪
♪ We'll get there fast and
then we'll take it slow ♪
♪ That's where
we wanna go ♪
♪ Way down to Kokomo ♪
♪ Aruba Jamaica ooo
I wanna take you ♪
♪ To Bermuda Bahama
come on pretty mama ♪
♪ Key Largo Montego
baby why don't we go ♪
[music continues]
♪ We'll get there fast and
then we'll take it slow ♪
♪ That's where
we wanna go ♪
♪ Way down to Kokomo ♪
♪ Aruba Jamaica ooo
I wanna take you ♪
♪ To Bermuda Bahama
come on pretty mama ♪
♪ Key Largo Montego
baby why don't we go ♪
♪ Jamaica ♪♪
[audience applauding]
- Everyone, thank you.
- Thank you!
[Beach Boys singing
"Barbara Ann"]
That was really good.
Thank you for singing along,
everybody, on Kokomo.
But now, we'd like to
introduce some new friends
to help us sing our next song.
They are the Tanner family.
♪ Everybody say yeah ♪
♪ Yeah ♪
♪ Yeah yeah ♪
♪ Yeah yeah yeah yeah
yeah yeah yeah yeah ♪
♪ Ah, ba ba ba
ba Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Ba ba ba ba
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Oh Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Take my hand ♪
♪ Barbara Ann ♪
♪ You got me rockin'
and a rollin' ♪
♪ Rockin' and
a reelin' Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Ba ba ba ba
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Went to a dance
looking for romance ♪
♪ Saw Barbara Ann so I
thought I'd take a chance ♪
♪ Ba ba ba ba
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Ba ba ba ba
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ You got me rockin'
and a rollin' ♪
♪ Rockin' and a reelin'
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Ba ba ba ba
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Ba ba ba ba
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Ba ba ba ba
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Ba ba ba ba
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Take my hand ♪
♪ Oh Barbara Ann ♪
♪ You got me rockin'
and a rollin' ♪
♪ Rockin' and
a reelin' Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Ba ba ba ba
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Stopped Peggy Sue
tried Betty Lou ♪
♪ Tried Mary Lou but
I knew she wouldn't do ♪
♪ Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Ba ba ba ba
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Ba ba ba ba
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ You got me rockin'
and a rollin' ♪
♪ Rockin' and a reelin'
Barbara Ann ♪♪
[music continues]
♪ Barbara Ann Barbara Ann ♪
♪ You got me rockin'
and a rollin' ♪
♪ Rockin' and a reelin'
Barbara Ann ♪
♪ Ba ba ba ba
Barbara Ann ♪♪
[audience cheering]
How 'bout the Tanner family?
Let's hear it for
the Tanner family
San Francisco.
'Alright.'
♪ Well she got her daddy's car
and she cruised ♪
♪ Through the hamburger
stand now ♪
♪ Seems she forgot
all about the library ♪
♪ Like she told
her old man now ♪
♪ And with the radio blasting
goes cruising ♪
♪ Just as fast
as she can now ♪
♪ And she'll have fun fun fun ♪
♪ 'Til her daddy
takes the T-Bird away ♪
♪ Well the girls
can't stand her.. ♪♪