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[instrumental music]
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Okay, Michelle, open your eyes.
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Wow!
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What is it?
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It's a tutu and a tiara.
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They were mine, and then
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I gave them to Stephanie.
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And I'm passing them on to you.
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Now you're a ballerina.
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Wow!
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What is a ballerina?
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A ballerina is a girl
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that does beautiful dancing.
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Watch us.
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[instrumental music]
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I'm glad I took bowling lessons.
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[theme music]
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♪ Ah ah ah ♪
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♪ Ah ♪
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♪ Whatever happened
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to predictability ♪
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♪ The milkman
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the paper boy ♪
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♪ Evenin' TV ♪
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♪ Ah ♪
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♪ Everywhere you look ♪
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♪ Everywhere ♪
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♪ There's a heart ♪
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♪ There's a heart ♪
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♪ A hand to hold on to ♪
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♪ Everywhere you look ♪
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♪ Everywhere ♪
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♪ There's a face ♪
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♪ Of somebody who needs you ♪
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♪ Everywhere you look ♪
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♪ When you're lost out there ♪
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♪ And you're all alone ♪
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♪ A light is waitin' ♪
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♪ To carry you home ♪
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♪ Everywhere you look ♪
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♪ Everywhere you look ♪
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♪ Dooby do ba ba dow ♪♪
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[instrumental music]
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Come on, guys.
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It's time for the big surprise.
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Danny, this better be important.
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We're working on a commercial
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for Rocket Feet running shoes.
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Trying to get inspired
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by running around.
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So far we haven't
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come up with any ideas.
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But we're in great shape.
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Wait till all you see this. I
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found one of my old videotapes.
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- Bye!
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- Bye!
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Guys, come back.
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It's not a home movie.
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It's a tape of Joey and me
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on my old college talk show.
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- Oh, let's see that.
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- Watch this.
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[instrumental music]
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Dad, that mustache.
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It's gross.
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This is Danny Tanner
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reminding you
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that disco will never die.
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Mr. Tanner, don't take this
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the wrong way
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but what a geek!
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Welcome to "Campus Rap."
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The show that takes
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a hard-hitting look
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at whatever the heck I want
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because this is my show.
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Well, here is a hard-hitting
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look at a brand new picture
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of my very own little girl.
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Could you zoom in there?
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Isn't she..
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I was adorable!
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- No, Steph, that's me.
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- It is?
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My, how you've aged!
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Well, today my guest
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is my very best friend.
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He's my fraternity brother
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and this guy is a party animal.
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Here's Joey Gladstone.
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Four years of college,
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look what I learned.
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[laughing]
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You were the big man on campus.
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Do something from your act.
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- Do your Jetsons routine.
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- Alright.
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[sputtering]
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[imitating Cogswell]
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Now, Spacely,
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you and that oddball, Jetson.
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- Cogswell.
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- Don't worry, Mr. Spacely.
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[imitating George]
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Everything will
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work out just great.
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[imitating Spacely]
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Jetson, you're fired.
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I love you, George.
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Oh, come on now.
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Cut it out. Thanks.
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Very funny. You are
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one talented guy, Joey.
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'You're right, Danny.'
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In fact, I guarantee you
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that in 10 years
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you'll be seeing this face
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sitting between
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Ed McMahon and Johnny Carson.
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We're talking Vegas,
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concert tours
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and of course, my own TV series
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"Laverne and Joey."
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I'm gonna check
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the date on that tape.
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What are you doing?
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I can't believe my ten year
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deadline's almost up.
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I got two weeks
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to become a star.
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Jess, can you handle that
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running shoe account without me?
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Sure, I can do
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one account by myself.
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Jess, if you have
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a dream, man you gotta go
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for it. I'm there for you, babe.
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And you know that seat
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between Johnny and Ed..
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...it's there for you too.
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Only now, you can fit in it.
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We're all there for you, Joey.
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- Right, girls?
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- Oh, yeah.
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Thanks, guys.
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Man, what have I been doing?
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I gotta focus
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on my comedy career.
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I gotta get down to the clubs,
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work up some new bits.
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From now on, Joey Gladstone
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is gonna be all comedy..
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...all the time.
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- All the time?
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- Why, certainly.
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[barks]
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[humming]
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Come on, let's watch
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the rest of this.
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Okay.
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[instrumental music]
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No!
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Oh, what's wrong, Michelle?
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Bad girls.
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Michelle, daddy wants us
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to get you ready for bed.
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- Time to take off your tutu.
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- No.
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Dad, you tell her
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she can't sleep in her tutu.
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Well, actually, girls
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it's perfectly normal
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for children
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to be attached
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to a special something.
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Michelle, if you wanna sleep
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in your tutu, it's okay.
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I told you so.
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I love you, daddy.
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I love you too.
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I hate that rabbit.
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Comedy alert.
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(in unison)
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Oh.
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- I gotta run. Bye.
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- See you, Joey.
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Stop! Nobody move!
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We were so close.
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Live from Las Vegas
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the song stylings
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of Jimmy Vibrato.
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♪ Hey people I love you ♪
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♪ O-o-oh ♪♪
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I have really gotta
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get myself some contacts.
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Boy.
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[laughs]
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Hey, look at this.
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Peeking duck.
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[laughs]
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Jess, you've been living
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in Toon town for two days now.
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Start acting
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like a human being.
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I know you are,
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but what am I?
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[laughs]
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Hey, you kids,
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stay off our planet.
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'Listen..'
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[screams]
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Get it off!
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It's attacking our village!
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[screams]
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I'm starting to lose it, man.
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Hey, what are you looking at?
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You look like Moe.
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There's traffic everywhere.
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The freeways
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are totally congested.
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And you,
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stop sponging off this family.
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♪ I'm singin' in the rain ♪
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♪ Just singin' in the rain ♪
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♪ On a happy.. ♪♪
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Excuse me, I gotta go down to
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the locker room and towel off.
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You give us the warden,
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we'll give you the priest.
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Michelle, let me show you
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my Bob Hope impression.
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No!
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Hey, is she wild or what, huh?
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Think I'm gonna put her
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on my special
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with Brooke Shields, huh?
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If he doesn't cheer down
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I'm gonna break
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his funny bone.
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Well, I might've done something
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that can actually
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help Joey's career.
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But if I tell you guys
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you gotta promise
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to keep it a secret.
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How rude.
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I can keep a secret.
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Alright, here it is.
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I sent a recent tape
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00:08:10,573 --> 00:08:12,784
of Joey's act
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to the people at "Star Search."
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- Oh, it's a good idea.
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- Alright, dad.
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Well, it doesn't mean
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he's on the show for sure.
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But we should
258
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find out real soon.
259
00:08:19,874 --> 00:08:21,960
Joey's going on "Star Search?"
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Wait till I tell..
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...nobody.
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[instrumental music]
263
00:08:30,551 --> 00:08:32,304
Daddy, Uncle Jesse, D.J.!
264
00:08:32,346 --> 00:08:35,015
Everybody but Joey, come here!
265
00:08:35,056 --> 00:08:36,308
What is it, Steph?
266
00:08:36,350 --> 00:08:37,809
We got a letter
267
00:08:36,350 --> 00:08:37,809
with Ed McMahon's
268
00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:38,893
picture on it!
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It must be from "Star Search."
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Well, is it good news?
271
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It's great news!
272
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We may already be millionaires!
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Hey, you guys, I'm gonna
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make some French toast.
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Joey, you sick? How come
276
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you're not acting goofy?
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00:08:54,868 --> 00:08:56,119
Who am I kidding, Jess?
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00:08:56,161 --> 00:08:57,578
My ten year deadline
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00:08:56,161 --> 00:08:57,578
is up today.
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I'm not famous.
281
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I'm never gonna be famous.
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The only thing that could save
283
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my career now is a miracle.
284
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Mail call.
285
00:09:03,543 --> 00:09:06,296
Letter for Danny Tanner.
286
00:09:06,338 --> 00:09:08,006
I'll take that.
287
00:09:08,673 --> 00:09:10,425
What, no tip?
288
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Here's a tip.
289
00:09:10,467 --> 00:09:13,678
Stay out of my mailbox.
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It so happens that
291
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the mailman delivered that
292
00:09:16,264 --> 00:09:17,807
to my house by mistake.
293
00:09:17,849 --> 00:09:19,100
It happens all the time
294
00:09:19,142 --> 00:09:21,520
but we only keep the magazines.
295
00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:27,192
Yes! Joey's gonna be
296
00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:27,192
on "Star Search!"
297
00:09:27,234 --> 00:09:29,277
Alright, Joey!
298
00:09:29,319 --> 00:09:31,738
Really?
299
00:09:29,319 --> 00:09:31,738
I'm gonna be on "Star Search."
300
00:09:31,779 --> 00:09:33,656
As a spokes model?
301
00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:38,245
This is great!
302
00:09:36,493 --> 00:09:38,245
How did this happen?
303
00:09:38,286 --> 00:09:39,620
Joey, we had
304
00:09:38,286 --> 00:09:39,620
so much faith in you
305
00:09:39,662 --> 00:09:43,166
we sent your tape
306
00:09:39,662 --> 00:09:43,166
to "Star Search."
307
00:09:43,208 --> 00:09:45,168
You guys are the best.
308
00:09:45,210 --> 00:09:46,794
This is so great.
309
00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:48,838
Finally, after all
310
00:09:46,836 --> 00:09:48,838
the years of struggling
311
00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:50,840
playing those
312
00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:50,840
little comedy clubs..
313
00:09:50,882 --> 00:09:53,009
...it all pays off right now.
314
00:09:53,051 --> 00:09:55,053
I am going on "Star Search"
315
00:09:55,095 --> 00:09:56,804
and I am gonna win.
316
00:09:56,846 --> 00:09:58,890
And I am on my way to the top.
317
00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:01,351
- Right!
318
00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:01,351
- Thank you, people, because..
319
00:10:01,393 --> 00:10:04,062
♪ I love ♪
320
00:10:05,730 --> 00:10:07,357
♪ You ♪
321
00:10:07,399 --> 00:10:11,361
♪ O-o-oh ♪♪
322
00:10:11,903 --> 00:10:13,321
Yes!
323
00:10:14,614 --> 00:10:16,324
[instrumental music]
324
00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:24,040
You won't believe who we saw
325
00:10:20,954 --> 00:10:24,040
tap-dancing in the hallway.
326
00:10:24,082 --> 00:10:25,459
Ed McMahon?
327
00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:28,587
The junior dance champions
328
00:10:25,500 --> 00:10:28,587
four weeks in a row.
329
00:10:28,628 --> 00:10:30,797
The Tapping Takayamas!
330
00:10:30,838 --> 00:10:34,050
I wish I could be
331
00:10:30,838 --> 00:10:34,050
on "Star Search" someday.
332
00:10:34,092 --> 00:10:36,595
Mr. Gladstone, ten minutes.
333
00:10:36,636 --> 00:10:38,179
Thanks.
334
00:10:38,221 --> 00:10:40,307
Why don't you show
335
00:10:38,221 --> 00:10:40,307
the nice man from "Star Search"
336
00:10:40,348 --> 00:10:43,226
...what a good
337
00:10:40,348 --> 00:10:43,226
ballerina you are?
338
00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:50,567
♪ Tomorrow tomorrow ♪
339
00:10:50,609 --> 00:10:52,652
♪ I love you tomorrow ♪
340
00:10:52,693 --> 00:10:56,281
♪ You're only a day away ♪
341
00:10:57,698 --> 00:10:58,825
Thank you.
342
00:10:58,866 --> 00:11:00,952
♪ Tomorrow tomorrow ♪
343
00:11:00,994 --> 00:11:03,538
♪ I love you tomorrow ♪♪
344
00:11:07,125 --> 00:11:10,753
- No more ballerina.
345
00:11:07,125 --> 00:11:10,753
- Why not?
346
00:11:10,795 --> 00:11:13,590
♪ Tomorrow tomorrow ♪
347
00:11:13,632 --> 00:11:16,675
♪ I love you tomorrow ♪♪
348
00:11:16,717 --> 00:11:17,760
Little kids.
349
00:11:17,802 --> 00:11:18,845
I better go get them
350
00:11:18,886 --> 00:11:21,055
before they
351
00:11:18,886 --> 00:11:21,055
embarrass themselves.
352
00:11:21,097 --> 00:11:23,891
♪ Tomorrow tomorrow ♪♪
353
00:11:25,018 --> 00:11:26,478
We better get back to our seats.
354
00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:28,813
- Go get them, Joey.
355
00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:28,813
- Yeah, and don't be nervous.
356
00:11:28,855 --> 00:11:30,148
Why should I be nervous?
357
00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:31,941
Just 'cause the last
358
00:11:30,190 --> 00:11:31,941
ten years comes down
359
00:11:31,983 --> 00:11:33,193
to the next ten minutes?
360
00:11:33,234 --> 00:11:35,362
Just because
361
00:11:33,234 --> 00:11:35,362
my entire life is riding
362
00:11:35,403 --> 00:11:38,490
on my one
363
00:11:35,403 --> 00:11:38,490
and only shot at stardom?
364
00:11:38,532 --> 00:11:40,450
You see, nothing
365
00:11:38,532 --> 00:11:40,450
to be nervous about.
366
00:11:40,492 --> 00:11:41,826
- Good luck, buddy.
367
00:11:40,492 --> 00:11:41,826
- Have fun.
368
00:11:41,868 --> 00:11:43,203
Thanks.
369
00:11:44,663 --> 00:11:46,122
Want to impress girls?
370
00:11:46,164 --> 00:11:48,124
Get one of these,
371
00:11:46,164 --> 00:11:48,124
then go to a disco and do this
372
00:11:48,166 --> 00:11:50,335
works out great.
373
00:11:51,545 --> 00:11:53,630
[instrumental music]
374
00:11:59,219 --> 00:12:01,304
[audience applauding]
375
00:12:07,561 --> 00:12:09,479
Thanks a lot, folks!
376
00:12:09,521 --> 00:12:11,898
That's it for me. Thanks!
377
00:12:16,528 --> 00:12:18,405
Funny stuff.
378
00:12:16,528 --> 00:12:18,405
Thank you, Steve.
379
00:12:18,446 --> 00:12:19,614
That was the champion.
380
00:12:19,656 --> 00:12:21,491
Now let's hear
381
00:12:19,656 --> 00:12:21,491
from the challenger.
382
00:12:21,533 --> 00:12:24,619
He's from San Francisco,
383
00:12:21,533 --> 00:12:24,619
works in advertising.
384
00:12:24,661 --> 00:12:27,205
He's been doing
385
00:12:24,661 --> 00:12:27,205
comedy for ten years.
386
00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:29,165
Whoa, that's a long time.
387
00:12:29,207 --> 00:12:32,544
Please, welcome,
388
00:12:29,207 --> 00:12:32,544
Joey Gladstone.
389
00:12:32,586 --> 00:12:34,671
[audience applauding]
390
00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:43,304
So I played ice hockey
391
00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:43,304
for 13 years.
392
00:12:43,346 --> 00:12:45,098
And it's great
393
00:12:43,346 --> 00:12:45,098
to be alive, thanks.
394
00:12:45,139 --> 00:12:46,391
[audience laughing]
395
00:12:46,433 --> 00:12:47,934
I'm playing in a league
396
00:12:46,433 --> 00:12:47,934
in California.
397
00:12:47,975 --> 00:12:50,103
And there are surfers
398
00:12:47,975 --> 00:12:50,103
in this ice-hockey league
399
00:12:50,144 --> 00:12:51,145
and these guys were thinking
400
00:12:51,187 --> 00:12:52,313
"If this ice melts
401
00:12:52,355 --> 00:12:54,357
cool, dude, surf's up."
402
00:12:54,399 --> 00:12:56,943
[audience laughing]
403
00:12:56,984 --> 00:12:58,194
There's a surfer
404
00:12:56,984 --> 00:12:58,194
standing next to me.
405
00:12:58,236 --> 00:12:59,613
He's got all his hockey gear on.
406
00:12:59,654 --> 00:13:02,240
He starts talking
407
00:12:59,654 --> 00:13:02,240
ice-hockey philosophy to me.
408
00:13:02,282 --> 00:13:03,742
He starts going
409
00:13:03,782 --> 00:13:05,660
"You know something, dude?"
410
00:13:06,911 --> 00:13:08,580
And he had a helmet on
411
00:13:06,911 --> 00:13:08,580
when he did that
412
00:13:08,622 --> 00:13:09,664
which was really weird.
413
00:13:09,706 --> 00:13:11,082
[audience laughing]
414
00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:12,417
"You know, like,
415
00:13:11,124 --> 00:13:12,417
the greatest thing
416
00:13:12,459 --> 00:13:14,711
"about ice hockey is, dude?
417
00:13:14,753 --> 00:13:16,755
"You break a bone or something
418
00:13:16,795 --> 00:13:19,549
the ice is, like, right there."
419
00:13:19,591 --> 00:13:21,676
[audience laughing]
420
00:13:23,553 --> 00:13:25,555
Remember those
421
00:13:23,553 --> 00:13:25,555
Jacques Cousteau specials
422
00:13:25,597 --> 00:13:28,015
that Rod Serling
423
00:13:25,597 --> 00:13:28,015
used to narrate?
424
00:13:28,057 --> 00:13:30,017
And Cousteau was always
425
00:13:28,057 --> 00:13:30,017
in search of something
426
00:13:30,059 --> 00:13:32,103
really strange.
427
00:13:30,059 --> 00:13:32,103
He goes like..
428
00:13:32,145 --> 00:13:35,189
[imitating Jacques Cousteau]
429
00:13:32,145 --> 00:13:35,189
We are going down
430
00:13:32,145 --> 00:13:35,189
to find lost tennis shoes.
431
00:13:35,231 --> 00:13:37,942
[audience laughing]
432
00:13:37,984 --> 00:13:39,193
Then you'd hear the theme music.
433
00:13:39,235 --> 00:13:40,695
[imitating bugle]
434
00:13:42,614 --> 00:13:44,823
[imitating Rob Serling]
435
00:13:42,614 --> 00:13:44,823
We find Cousteau
436
00:13:42,614 --> 00:13:44,823
and the Calypso team
437
00:13:44,865 --> 00:13:46,785
three miles off
438
00:13:44,865 --> 00:13:46,785
the coast of the Netherlands.
439
00:13:46,825 --> 00:13:48,495
There, they ready
440
00:13:46,825 --> 00:13:48,495
their sonar equipment
441
00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:51,122
to go in search
442
00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:51,122
of the dying walrus.
443
00:13:51,164 --> 00:13:53,249
[crowd applauding]
444
00:13:56,835 --> 00:13:58,921
[imitating seagull]
445
00:14:01,174 --> 00:14:03,842
[imitating Jacques Cousteau]
446
00:14:01,174 --> 00:14:03,842
I love ocean life.
447
00:14:05,928 --> 00:14:07,054
[imitating seagull]
448
00:14:09,098 --> 00:14:13,144
[imitating Jacques Cousteau]
449
00:14:09,098 --> 00:14:13,144
Everywhere I go
450
00:14:09,098 --> 00:14:13,144
I hear those damn birds.
451
00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:16,022
[imitating Rob Serling]
452
00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:16,022
Finally, Cousteau gives
453
00:14:13,186 --> 00:14:16,022
the orders to lower the sonar.
454
00:14:16,063 --> 00:14:18,149
[speaking in foreign language]
455
00:14:23,029 --> 00:14:24,947
What?
456
00:14:24,989 --> 00:14:26,825
[imitating Jacques Cousteau]
457
00:14:24,989 --> 00:14:26,825
Just lower
458
00:14:24,989 --> 00:14:26,825
the damn thing. Go on.
459
00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:28,242
[audience laughing]
460
00:14:28,284 --> 00:14:29,786
And of course,
461
00:14:28,284 --> 00:14:29,786
this is what Flipper's wife says
462
00:14:29,828 --> 00:14:30,870
when she has a headache..
463
00:14:30,911 --> 00:14:33,289
Uh-huh, uh-huh..
464
00:14:33,331 --> 00:14:35,458
Come on now.
465
00:14:33,331 --> 00:14:35,458
Cut it out.
466
00:14:35,500 --> 00:14:36,543
Quit it.
467
00:14:36,584 --> 00:14:37,960
[audience applauding]
468
00:14:38,002 --> 00:14:39,629
- Alright, Joey!
469
00:14:38,002 --> 00:14:39,629
- Joey!
470
00:14:39,671 --> 00:14:42,256
I've always loved
471
00:14:39,671 --> 00:14:42,256
Popeye cartoons.
472
00:14:42,298 --> 00:14:43,800
Seems like every episode
473
00:14:42,298 --> 00:14:43,800
of "Popeye, The Sailor"
474
00:14:43,842 --> 00:14:44,843
is always the same.
475
00:14:44,884 --> 00:14:46,135
It's where Popeye and Bluto
476
00:14:46,177 --> 00:14:47,846
are fighting over Olive Oyl.
477
00:14:47,887 --> 00:14:49,263
And I think we could see why.
478
00:14:49,305 --> 00:14:51,098
[imitating Popeye]
479
00:14:49,305 --> 00:14:51,098
What a bod, huh?
480
00:14:51,140 --> 00:14:53,226
[audience laughing]
481
00:14:55,102 --> 00:14:56,521
Olive Oyl always gets
482
00:14:55,102 --> 00:14:56,521
in some kind of stupid
483
00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:58,314
predicament
484
00:14:56,563 --> 00:14:58,314
in the beginning of the show.
485
00:14:58,356 --> 00:15:00,608
[imitating Olive Oyl]
486
00:14:58,356 --> 00:15:00,608
Oh, Popeye.
487
00:14:58,356 --> 00:15:00,608
Oh, dear. Oh, my.
488
00:15:00,650 --> 00:15:03,695
[imitating Popeye]
489
00:15:00,650 --> 00:15:03,695
Oh, boy, that dizzy broad,
490
00:15:00,650 --> 00:15:03,695
Olive Oyl. How embarrassing.
491
00:15:03,737 --> 00:15:05,822
[audience applauding]
492
00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:12,078
Of course, he knocks Bluto
493
00:15:10,243 --> 00:15:12,078
for one big, solid punch.
494
00:15:12,119 --> 00:15:13,788
Really nails him.
495
00:15:13,830 --> 00:15:15,331
[imitating Bluto]
496
00:15:13,830 --> 00:15:15,331
You're gonna pay for this.
497
00:15:15,373 --> 00:15:18,125
At that time,
498
00:15:15,373 --> 00:15:18,125
Popeye wins his beautiful..
499
00:15:18,167 --> 00:15:19,460
...vivacious-looking queen.
500
00:15:19,502 --> 00:15:20,920
Yep, you guessed it.
501
00:15:20,961 --> 00:15:22,463
Olive Oyl.
502
00:15:22,505 --> 00:15:24,173
Yeah, and what a babe, huh?
503
00:15:24,215 --> 00:15:25,759
Check her out.
504
00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:27,886
[audience applauding]
505
00:15:32,390 --> 00:15:35,142
♪ Well don't even call ♪
506
00:15:35,184 --> 00:15:37,395
♪ If I'm out with me Olive ♪
507
00:15:37,437 --> 00:15:41,190
♪ Says Popeye the sailor man ♪♪
508
00:15:41,232 --> 00:15:43,651
Thanks a lot. You guys
509
00:15:41,232 --> 00:15:43,651
were great. Thank you.
510
00:15:43,693 --> 00:15:45,779
[audience applauding]
511
00:15:47,530 --> 00:15:49,616
[audience cheering]
512
00:15:53,327 --> 00:15:54,287
Thank you, Joey.
513
00:15:54,328 --> 00:15:55,705
Very funny routines
514
00:15:55,747 --> 00:15:57,916
from both our competitors
515
00:15:55,747 --> 00:15:57,916
this evening.
516
00:15:57,957 --> 00:15:59,667
Now, the judges have voted.
517
00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:02,378
Now let's see
518
00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:02,378
how both of you, rated.
519
00:16:02,420 --> 00:16:05,172
Champion Steve Oedekerk gets..
520
00:16:05,214 --> 00:16:07,842
...four stars, a perfect score.
521
00:16:07,884 --> 00:16:09,969
[audience applauding]
522
00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:14,974
The challenger,
523
00:16:11,638 --> 00:16:14,974
Joey Gladstone gets..
524
00:16:15,015 --> 00:16:17,351
...four stars!
525
00:16:15,015 --> 00:16:17,351
Another perfect score.
526
00:16:17,393 --> 00:16:19,437
We have a tie!
527
00:16:22,148 --> 00:16:23,524
Well, as you may know..
528
00:16:23,566 --> 00:16:25,902
...the way we break
529
00:16:23,566 --> 00:16:25,902
ties here on "Star Search"
530
00:16:25,944 --> 00:16:29,196
is to have the studio audience
531
00:16:25,944 --> 00:16:29,196
vote for their favorite.
532
00:16:29,238 --> 00:16:32,533
We'll have the results
533
00:16:29,238 --> 00:16:32,533
at the end of tonight's show.
534
00:16:32,575 --> 00:16:34,410
Judy.
535
00:16:34,452 --> 00:16:38,080
This night of shining stars
536
00:16:34,452 --> 00:16:38,080
will return on "Star Search 90."
537
00:16:38,122 --> 00:16:40,249
So don't go away.
538
00:16:40,291 --> 00:16:43,795
- I won't.
539
00:16:40,291 --> 00:16:43,795
- Danny, sit.
540
00:16:44,712 --> 00:16:46,798
[instrumental music]
541
00:16:48,800 --> 00:16:49,968
We're back.
542
00:16:50,009 --> 00:16:51,344
Now for the tiebreaker
543
00:16:51,385 --> 00:16:52,720
in the comedy competition
544
00:16:52,762 --> 00:16:54,013
to see who goes on toward
545
00:16:54,054 --> 00:16:56,808
that $100,000 grand prize.
546
00:16:56,850 --> 00:16:59,560
Our studio audience
547
00:16:56,850 --> 00:16:59,560
voted by secret ballot.
548
00:16:59,602 --> 00:17:01,145
I have the results right here.
549
00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,982
It's between the champion,
550
00:17:01,187 --> 00:17:03,982
Steve Oedekerk
551
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:06,317
or the challenger,
552
00:17:04,023 --> 00:17:06,317
Joey Gladstone.
553
00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:07,986
(Joey)
554
00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:07,986
Well, this is it.
555
00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:10,363
The beginning or the end
556
00:17:08,027 --> 00:17:10,363
of my comedy career.
557
00:17:10,404 --> 00:17:13,366
At least, he's going through
558
00:17:10,404 --> 00:17:13,366
the same torment I am.
559
00:17:13,407 --> 00:17:16,410
I wonder where can I get
560
00:17:13,407 --> 00:17:16,410
a good burger after the show.
561
00:17:16,452 --> 00:17:18,287
[audience applauding]
562
00:17:18,329 --> 00:17:19,497
Alright.
563
00:17:19,539 --> 00:17:21,415
Let's see who it's gonna be.
564
00:17:22,625 --> 00:17:24,168
Ladies and gentlemen..
565
00:17:24,210 --> 00:17:25,879
...Steve Oedekerk!
566
00:17:25,920 --> 00:17:26,963
Still champion!
567
00:17:27,005 --> 00:17:29,089
[audience applauding]
568
00:17:30,508 --> 00:17:32,719
Congratulations, Steve.
569
00:17:30,508 --> 00:17:32,719
That's great.
570
00:17:32,760 --> 00:17:34,178
We'll see you
571
00:17:32,760 --> 00:17:34,178
back here on this stage
572
00:17:34,220 --> 00:17:35,972
next week on "Star Search."
573
00:17:36,014 --> 00:17:38,016
Good job.
574
00:17:38,057 --> 00:17:40,142
[instrumental music]
575
00:17:46,649 --> 00:17:48,818
- Joey! Good show, buddy!
576
00:17:46,649 --> 00:17:48,818
- Yeah.
577
00:17:48,860 --> 00:17:51,779
Just remember, that guy needed
578
00:17:48,860 --> 00:17:51,779
four arms to beat you.
579
00:17:51,821 --> 00:17:53,865
Joey, you were the best.
580
00:17:53,907 --> 00:17:55,783
You were better than the best.
581
00:17:55,825 --> 00:17:57,284
You were the bestest.
582
00:17:57,326 --> 00:17:59,579
You were super best-o-rama.
583
00:17:59,620 --> 00:18:01,414
- You were the--
584
00:17:59,620 --> 00:18:01,414
- Steph.
585
00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:04,124
You're gonna
586
00:18:01,455 --> 00:18:04,124
wear out your tongue.
587
00:18:04,166 --> 00:18:06,252
You just hate my spunk.
588
00:18:07,461 --> 00:18:08,963
Well, thanks, everybody.
589
00:18:09,005 --> 00:18:10,548
I'm just glad
590
00:18:09,005 --> 00:18:10,548
I'm getting out of comedy
591
00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:13,051
while I'm still young
592
00:18:10,590 --> 00:18:13,051
enough to laugh about it.
593
00:18:13,092 --> 00:18:14,385
[laughs]
594
00:18:16,220 --> 00:18:18,639
Uh, girls,
595
00:18:16,220 --> 00:18:18,639
your Uncle Jesse and I
596
00:18:18,681 --> 00:18:20,140
wanna talk to Joey for a second.
597
00:18:20,182 --> 00:18:22,518
Why don't you, uh,
598
00:18:20,182 --> 00:18:22,518
go get Ed McMahon's autograph
599
00:18:22,560 --> 00:18:24,478
and find out when our
600
00:18:22,560 --> 00:18:24,478
million dollars is coming.
601
00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:26,064
- Okay.
602
00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:26,064
- Okay.
603
00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:27,607
- Joey--
604
00:18:26,105 --> 00:18:27,607
- Look, guys.
605
00:18:27,648 --> 00:18:28,816
You can save the pep talk.
606
00:18:28,858 --> 00:18:30,568
I already know
607
00:18:28,858 --> 00:18:30,568
what you're gonna say.
608
00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:32,653
"Keep working at it.
609
00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:32,653
It's gonna happen.
610
00:18:32,695 --> 00:18:34,572
"You got a perfect score
611
00:18:32,695 --> 00:18:34,572
on "Star Search."
612
00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:36,699
"You made millions
613
00:18:34,614 --> 00:18:36,699
of people laugh.
614
00:18:36,741 --> 00:18:38,200
"Your deadline
615
00:18:36,741 --> 00:18:38,200
was totally arbitrary.
616
00:18:38,242 --> 00:18:41,454
So if you give up now,
617
00:18:38,242 --> 00:18:41,454
you are stupid."
618
00:18:41,495 --> 00:18:42,747
Does that pretty much cover it?
619
00:18:42,789 --> 00:18:44,958
- Actually, yeah.
620
00:18:42,789 --> 00:18:44,958
- Yeah, that was..
621
00:18:49,963 --> 00:18:52,214
Look, guys,
622
00:18:49,963 --> 00:18:52,214
I know you care about me.
623
00:18:52,256 --> 00:18:54,092
But I'm doing the right thing.
624
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:55,885
There comes a time
625
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:55,885
in every man's life
626
00:18:55,927 --> 00:18:58,262
where he's gotta face the music
627
00:18:55,927 --> 00:18:58,262
and say to himself
628
00:18:58,304 --> 00:18:59,597
"Hey, I'm a failure."
629
00:18:59,639 --> 00:19:02,391
Hey, ho-ho-hold it.
630
00:19:02,433 --> 00:19:04,226
Nobody calls my friend,
631
00:19:02,433 --> 00:19:04,226
Joey a failure.
632
00:19:04,268 --> 00:19:07,021
Especially, my friend, Joey.
633
00:19:07,063 --> 00:19:09,816
How else can you
634
00:19:07,063 --> 00:19:09,816
figure it, Jess?
635
00:19:09,857 --> 00:19:11,358
I'm a local nightclub comic.
636
00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:12,986
That's all I'm ever gonna be.
637
00:19:13,027 --> 00:19:15,655
I've been in the same rut
638
00:19:13,027 --> 00:19:15,655
for the last ten years.
639
00:19:15,696 --> 00:19:18,491
I've never been on "Carson"
640
00:19:15,696 --> 00:19:18,491
or "Letterman" or "Arsenio."
641
00:19:18,532 --> 00:19:19,867
If that's not failure,
642
00:19:18,532 --> 00:19:19,867
I don't know what is.
643
00:19:19,909 --> 00:19:21,368
I'll tell you what is.
644
00:19:19,909 --> 00:19:21,368
That attitude.
645
00:19:21,410 --> 00:19:23,496
That's failure, man.
646
00:19:23,537 --> 00:19:27,041
Your problem is the way
647
00:19:23,537 --> 00:19:27,041
that you're looking at success.
648
00:19:27,083 --> 00:19:29,752
Do you love
649
00:19:27,083 --> 00:19:29,752
being a standup comic?
650
00:19:29,794 --> 00:19:31,253
Well, yeah.
651
00:19:31,295 --> 00:19:32,546
Have you made
652
00:19:31,295 --> 00:19:32,546
thousands of people laugh?
653
00:19:32,588 --> 00:19:35,424
- Millions tonight?
654
00:19:32,588 --> 00:19:35,424
- Well, yeah.
655
00:19:35,466 --> 00:19:37,677
Alright, before this little
656
00:19:35,466 --> 00:19:37,677
stupid deadline of yours
657
00:19:37,718 --> 00:19:38,803
were you happy with your life?
658
00:19:38,845 --> 00:19:41,263
- Yes!
659
00:19:38,845 --> 00:19:41,263
- Hmm.
660
00:19:41,305 --> 00:19:43,683
Personal happiness
661
00:19:41,305 --> 00:19:43,683
and bringing joy to others
662
00:19:43,724 --> 00:19:45,225
it sounds like success to me.
663
00:19:46,853 --> 00:19:49,480
Joey, I know how you feel, pal.
664
00:19:46,853 --> 00:19:49,480
I'm the same way, man.
665
00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:51,816
I'm not where I wanna be
666
00:19:49,522 --> 00:19:51,816
with my music career.
667
00:19:51,858 --> 00:19:53,317
But even if I
668
00:19:51,858 --> 00:19:53,317
never sell a record
669
00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:55,319
I'm not gonna have one regret.
670
00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:55,319
You know why?
671
00:19:55,361 --> 00:19:56,904
Because I love making music
672
00:19:56,946 --> 00:19:59,824
and I'm never
673
00:19:56,946 --> 00:19:59,824
gonna stop doing it.
674
00:19:59,866 --> 00:20:03,161
Now, if you never
675
00:19:59,866 --> 00:20:03,161
get up on-stage again..
676
00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:05,287
...would you miss it?
677
00:20:09,333 --> 00:20:12,170
Danny, is there anything
678
00:20:09,333 --> 00:20:12,170
you'd like to add?
679
00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:14,588
Oh, I'm sorry,
680
00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:14,588
I wasn't listening.
681
00:20:16,174 --> 00:20:18,509
I was thinking
682
00:20:16,174 --> 00:20:18,509
about that spokes model.
683
00:20:19,927 --> 00:20:22,013
[instrumental music]
684
00:20:45,369 --> 00:20:47,246
A twister. A twister.
685
00:20:47,287 --> 00:20:49,123
Aunt Em, Aunt Em!
686
00:20:49,165 --> 00:20:51,000
Oh..
687
00:20:51,042 --> 00:20:54,378
I knew I should've
688
00:20:51,042 --> 00:20:54,378
done that "Wizard of Oz" bit.
689
00:20:54,420 --> 00:20:57,048
Well, I gave it my best shot.
690
00:20:57,090 --> 00:20:59,175
Ten years.
691
00:21:00,093 --> 00:21:02,428
It's been a great ten years.
692
00:21:02,469 --> 00:21:04,847
Oh, but what have I
693
00:21:02,469 --> 00:21:04,847
got to show for it?
694
00:21:06,515 --> 00:21:09,102
I do do the best Popeye
695
00:21:06,515 --> 00:21:09,102
in the business.
696
00:21:09,143 --> 00:21:10,895
[imitates Popeye]
697
00:21:10,937 --> 00:21:13,022
[laughing]
698
00:21:14,190 --> 00:21:16,609
Oh, Michelle.
699
00:21:17,484 --> 00:21:19,779
I do love that sound.
700
00:21:23,490 --> 00:21:25,451
Michelle, I have been
701
00:21:23,490 --> 00:21:25,451
on so many stages
702
00:21:25,492 --> 00:21:27,536
and told so many jokes.
703
00:21:29,663 --> 00:21:33,126
But you know, I never get
704
00:21:29,663 --> 00:21:33,126
tired of hearing people laugh.
705
00:21:33,167 --> 00:21:35,169
So why am I walking away?
706
00:21:35,211 --> 00:21:36,921
I don't know.
707
00:21:37,588 --> 00:21:40,049
Yeah, me either.
708
00:21:40,091 --> 00:21:43,136
I did have that deadline.
709
00:21:40,091 --> 00:21:43,136
Oh, but let's face it.
710
00:21:43,177 --> 00:21:45,304
I've never been on time
711
00:21:43,177 --> 00:21:45,304
for anything in my entire life.
712
00:21:45,345 --> 00:21:47,223
So why start now?
713
00:21:48,599 --> 00:21:50,059
I'll make a new deadline.
714
00:21:50,101 --> 00:21:52,394
Michelle, you're my witness.
715
00:21:52,436 --> 00:21:54,147
If I'm not on the "Carson" show
716
00:21:54,188 --> 00:21:57,066
in...60 years
717
00:21:57,108 --> 00:21:58,567
I'm gonna seriously consider
718
00:21:58,609 --> 00:22:01,112
changing my career.
719
00:22:01,154 --> 00:22:04,991
So to paraphrase Porky Pig
720
00:22:05,032 --> 00:22:06,617
[imitating Porky Pig]
721
00:22:05,032 --> 00:22:06,617
Biddy-biddy-biddy-biddy.
722
00:22:06,659 --> 00:22:08,535
That ain't all, folks!
723
00:22:10,579 --> 00:22:12,665
[applauding]
724
00:22:15,668 --> 00:22:19,755
♪ We love you ♪
725
00:22:20,298 --> 00:22:22,967
♪ Ooh ♪♪
726
00:22:23,009 --> 00:22:25,803
Come on, you guys.
727
00:22:23,009 --> 00:22:25,803
Cut it out!
728
00:22:27,972 --> 00:22:29,640
[theme music]