Joltin' Joey Gladstone
is at the plate.
Stephanie Tanner, the crafty
right-hander, is on the mound.
'The windup, the pitch..'
Strike three!
You're out!
What? That ball was
outside by a mile.
Ball four.
It was a strike!
It was a ball!
It was a strike!
It was a ball!
It was a strike!
It was a ball!
Oh, so it was a ball.
Thank you very much.
Hey, you tricked me.
You're out of the game.
- What?
- You heard the ump.
- You're out of here.
- Yeah, hit the showers.
And wash behind your ears.
Alright, fine,
I'm out of the game
I'm just taking my bat and ball
and I'm going home.
Hold it. You're back
in the game. Play ball!
- Play ball.
Give me one in here.
[theme music]
♪ Ahhh ahh ahh ahhh ♪
♪ Aahh ♪
♪ Whatever happened
to predictability ♪
♪ The milkman
the paper boy ♪
♪ Evenin' TV ♪
♪ When did I get
to living here ♪
♪ Somebody tell me please ♪
♪ This whole world
confusing me ♪
♪ Clouds as mean as
you ever seen ♪
♪ In a bird who knows
your tune ♪
♪ Then a little voice
that's inside you whispers ♪
♪ Kid don't sell
your dreams so soon ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Everywhere ♪
♪ There's a heart ♪
♪ A hand to hold on to ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ Everywhere ♪
♪ There's a face ♪
♪ Of somebody who needs you ♪
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
♪ When you're lost out
there and you're all alone ♪
♪ A light is waiting
to carry you home ♪
♪ Every where you look ♪
♪ Dooby do ba ba dow ♪♪
[instrumental music]
Danny, dare I ask
what you're doing?
I'm cleaning my leaves.
You're gonna clean
every leaf in the garden?
Of course not Joey. That would
be totally compulsive behavior.
I'm just doin' the dirty ones.
Hello, boys.
Hey, biker babe,
how's it going?
Not good. A boy said..
♪ Baby baby
stick your head in gravy ♪♪
Well, Michelle, if he said that,
then he's the baby.
Next time, you just
be a big girl and say.
♪ So so
suck your toe ♪
♪ All the way
to Mexico ♪♪
You're a wonderful role model.
Well, at least I don't
simonize my plants.
Michelle, why would
somebody call you a baby?
'Cause I still need
baby training wheels.
Oh, honey,
that's alright.
Kids take off
their training wheels
at all different ages.
I was even
a little older than you.
Danny, you still had training
wheels on your paper route.
I want to learn
how to ride right now.
That's the Tanner spirit.
I wonder who could teach me.
Daddy?
Michelle, honestly
I'd love to teach you.
But Vicky's coming over
and we've got to work
on next week's shows.
I'd love to teach
you tomorrow.
Tomorrow?
Hello, Joe.
Danny, can I
teach her how to ride?
Please, please, please,
with a cherry on top?
Now, you know I can't
say no to that.
That's why I said it.
Okay, sweetheart.
But I'm going to be the one
that teaches you how to drive..
...on your 30th birthday.
Alright, Michelle,
when I get finished with you
you're gonna be riding
on two wheels.
- Yes!
- Burning rubber!
- Yes!
- Poppin' wheelies!
- Yes!
- Jumping over school buses!
Oh, no, no, no.
Yes, yes, yes.
You two are the most beautiful
babies in the whole world.
Now, I know every
other mother says that.
But every other mother is wrong.
Because you two really are
the most beautiful babies
in the whole world.
Yes, you are.
- Hi, sweetheart.
- Hi, honey.
I was just getting the mail.
Let me tell you somethin'.
It's a perfect day
in San Francisco.
So, I got a great idea,
I say we pack the kids up
and we take them
on their very first car ride.
Jess, that's a great idea.
Can we do that?
Well, they're our kids.
It's our car.
I think it's legal.
What do you say?
Nikster, Big Al.
You cats want
to go for a ride?
[baby cooing]
You see that? They're psyched.
Boy, just like the old days.
I can't believe we're do this.
We're gonna hop in the car,
we're gonna take a drive
just like we did before we had..
...the two most beautiful babies
in the whole world.
Beck, we're still
the same fun loving
free-spirited people
we've always been.
It's just that,
there's more of us, that's all.
now, I've got
the perfect place to go.
- The Harley shop.
- Aunt Ida's.
- Aunt Ida's?
- The Harley shop?
Yeah, the new
ultra-glides are in.
The kids were just
saying yesterday.
they were dying to see 'em.
But, Aunt Ida's
got a new hairdo.
Whoo.
Look, Aunt Ida hates me,
alright.
She calls me the hoodlum.
For your wedding,
she got you that book
"Smart Women,
Foolish Choices".
Oh, she's kidding,
just kidding.
Yeah, I love her comedy.
Jess, come on, honey,
she's still my aunt.
Besides, she's been begging me
to bring the twins over.
Alright, alright, okay,
we'll visit the Harley shop.
Go check out Ida's new do.
Okay, and then, it's great.
We'll be like spontaneous,
you know? Alright.
We're going to ride like
the wind, huh boys?
Ride like the wind, huh?
- Okay.
- Grab a kid, let's go.
Alright, oh wait, honey.
Before we ride like the wind.
Alex needs to be fed.
Yes, he does.
And Nicky needs
to take a nap.
Yeah, we don't want them
to be cranky
when we go to at aunt Ida's.
Yeah, Ida's cranky enough
for all of us.
Alright, here we go boys.
You gotta eat and take a nap.
Then when we're done, we're
gonna ride like the wind, huh.
Doesn't that sound great?
They can hardly
contain themselves.
Oh, no I hate this video.
Where's the remote?
It's on top of the TV.
Oh, well.
Girls, it's such
a beautiful day outside.
Wouldn't you like to
go get some fresh air?
- No.
Don't you have
homework to do?
(both)
No.
Do you have some friends
you wanna hang out with?
- No.
Lemme give you another option.
Please leave!
Look, I got to work
in here, okay
'cause Vicky's coming over.
- Ooh!
There is nothing
to "ooh!" about.
Oh, yes, there is.
You kissed her.
Dad, don't be so
embarrassed.
You two make a cute couple.
Go for it.
Look, it was one little
goodnight kiss.
We haven't even
talked about it since.
What?
You've worked with her
every day for a week
and you haven't even
brought it up?
Why are you such a chicken?
I am not a chicken.
This is a very
delicate situation
and I'm just proceeding
cautiously because--
[clucking]
Would you girls please
give me a break?
Maybe she doesn't
even remember the kiss.
Maybe she hated it.
Well, think positive.
Maybe she doesn't
remember she hated it.
[doorbell rings]
That's Vicky.
- Ooh!
There's nothing between us.
- Hi, Danny.
- Hi.
- Hi, girls.
- Hi, Vicky.
We were just talking
about you.
No, no, we weren't.
Well, yeah, we were
just talking about the fact
that you were just
outside the door.
But now that you're inside..
...our talk is pretty much over.
Well, thanks for
catching me up.
Well, Steph,
let's go to the store.
Do you guys need anything?
Milk? Juice? Chapstick?
Thanks, we'll be fine.
You can take your time
at the store.
Are you sure you don't need
anymore Binaca, dad?
Bye, girls.
Aren't they precious?
Danny, you seem a little
nervous, is anything wrong?
No! No, no, no.
Well, great.
Then should we get to work?
Yes, yes, yes.
Uh, I-I made a list of possible
guests for next week.
Uh, Joe Montana,
Henry Kisser, Sean Penn--
Uh..
Kisser?
Excuse me?
You just said
"Henry Kisser."
Ah, no. I said Henry Kissinger.
It's written write there.
Why would I say Henry Kisser?
Oh, that-that's right.
Why would you say that?
It's not on your lips.
Your list, your list.
Vicky, why are
we doing this?
We both know that
we kissed last week.
You're right..
And now that it's
out in the open
I-I think the best
thing to do is..
To forget it ever happened.
Right.
It-it-it's forgotten..
What-whatever it was.
I mean, not that it
wasn't, uh, a nice kiss.
I liked it.
Really?
I liked it, too.
A lot.
But..
That doesn't matter now,
because, uh..
- It never happened.
So, uh..
Alright, Michelle,
you got your helmet.
You got your goggles,
you got your elbow pads
you got your knee pads,
you got your shin pads.
You ready to ride?
I don't know
if I can move.
Well, better safe
than sorry.
You don't
want to get hurt.
Hurt? Why did you say that word?
Oh, I'm sure
you won't get hurt.
But, this way at least
you'll be protected
in case you fall off.
Fall off?
More bad words!
Okay, time out.
Now, forget about
all those bad words.
There's really nothing to it.
Now, watch carefully
as I get on the bike.
Push off.
And pedal!
See? Woo!
Nothing to it!
No hands! Ha ha!
- Hello.
- Oh, hello!
Uh, this isn't my bike.
That's not my kid.
I'm available!
Probably not into big guys
with small bikes.
Okay, now..
...It's your turn, Michelle.
Just hop on, push off,
and start pedaling.
And I'll hold onto the back.
- That's it?
- Oh, piece of cake.
Alright, get on the bike.
I'll hold onto the back.
And trust me
There's nothing to worry about.
Okay?
On your mark, get set..
...start pedaling.
Attagirl.
Alright!
Looking good!
This is easy!
Attagirl, you're doing it
all by yourself!
I am? Holy cow!
Whoa!
Michelle, are you okay?
'I'm so sorry.
Are you hurt?'
You let go of me!
I only let go because
you were doing so well.
Then why am I in this bush?
Okay, let's get you
out of there, kiddo.
I think you're going to be okay.
No, I'm not.
I got a scrape.
Ouch!
Well, it's not a bad scrape.
You're gonna be just fine.
Now, let's get back
on the bike and try again.
What am I, nuts?
This time I promise
I won't let go.
I'll never trust you again!
Michelle.
Michelle!
Aw, come on, sweetheart.
Michelle, I'm sorry
you fell off your bike.
Okay, if you
won't talk to Joey.
[imitating Bullwinkle]
Will you talk to
your old pal Bullwinkle?
Okay, tell Joey
I'm very mad at him.
Joey, Michelle
is very mad at you.
Maybe you can tell her
that it was just an accident
and I love her like crazy.
Maybe she won't
believe you.
She will.
She won't.
She will.
She won't.
She will.
She won't.
Oh, I saw a smile.
- Oops.
- No, too late.
I already saw you smiling.
Only because you're funny.
Well, that's a start.
Can I fix that
scrape for you?
Can Bullwinkle do it?
Why, certainly.
Dr. Bullwinkle T. Moose
at your service.
Just have a seat in my office.
Okay, here we go.
Sit tight for a moment.
Now, this may sting a little.
Ouch! That stings a lot!
I'm sorry.
You lied again. Now I
really don't trust you.
It wasn't me.
It was, uh..
It was Bullwinkle.
Oh, sure.
Blamin' on the moose.
Okay, you're fed, changed,
dressed and still napping
and one hour later, we're ready
to be totally spontaneous.
Not so fast.
We got to put on our CTHS.
Our Car Trip Hats.
Jesse, Aunt Ida hates it when
you wear your hat backwards.
I know.
Boys?
Get ready to bug your Aunt Ida.
Here you go.
There you go.
Alright!
There, now we're
ready to ride like the wind.
Wait a minute.
We need extra diapers.
Right, alright,
you guys rest up.
Because when you meet Aunt Ida.
You won't sleep for days.
Jesse Katsopolis!
Here, let's grab this bag.
- Okay.
- Alright.
I've got the diapers.
Oh, baby wipes.
Baby wipes, very good.
Well, you know what
Nicky's got a little rash.
We need that baby butt stuff
the, uh...here it is.
Okay, one more diaper
and we are set.
Oh, wait a minute,
Just to be safe
we better take everything
on the changing table.
Good thinking.
Alright, there we are.
Spontaneously packed and ready
to ride like the wind.
Oh, wait a minute!
Jess, it could get windy.
We better bring
blankets and scarves.
Good thinking.
Oh, wait a minute,
wait a minute, What if it rains?
We're gonna have to get
their slickers
and their galoshie-booties
alright.
Wait a minute.
It could get really hot.
Sun suits.
You know what, we don't know
what's going to happen
out there, I say we take
the whole dresser.
Honey, I just
had a thought.
I mean, this is the first time
the boys will be away from home.
Maybe, we should bring something
familiar and comforting.
Right, their Elvis mobiles.
You know..
...I've been looking
for an excuse
to hang these on the rear-view
mirror, anyway.
Ah, Jess, honey,
do you think they might
miss their stuffed animals.
Of course they'll miss
their stuffed animals
We gotta take them,
here there you go.
Ready?
And catch.
- Got it.
- And catch.
- Got it.
- And catch.
Okay, we've, we've gone over
all the days of the week.
Monday, Tuesday, uh..
All those other days.
I'm sorry, Danny.
What did you say?
I have no idea.
I-I can't think about
anything but that kiss.
Me, too.
This is crazy.
We work together.
Yeah, you're right.
We cannot start a relationship.
Yeah and who knows
where I'll be
after Becky comes back
to "Wake Up, San Francisco?
Let's just forget about it.
It's forgotten.
Whoa! Make out,
San Francisco!
Steph, go to your room.
I mean, hi! You learn
to ride that bike yet?
That's Michelle.
Nice shade of lipstick, dad.
Don't you girls have somebody
else you can go embarrass?
Sorry, dad, you two have fun
playing tonsil hockey.
Have I, uh, mentioned
to you how precious they are?
Vicky, why are we
doing this to ourselves?
I don't know.
Maybe we should go with it.
You know what?
You're right.
Let's be crazy.
Let's be totally outrageous.
Vicky, come with me.
Let's fly to Paris tonight.
Oh, Danny, Danny we have
a show to do tomorrow.
How about frozen yogurt?
You wild man!
- Vanilla.
- You're insane!
Ah, with sprinkles.
Get the door.
Okay, just follow
the sound of my voice, Jess.
Come on. Straight ahead.
There you go.
Alright.
Here we go.
Now we're ready to..
...ride like the wind.
Do you think
we really need all this stuff?
I mean, we're only be gone
two or three hours.
That's what Gilligan said.
Oh, yeah, good point.
We wouldn't wanna get
shipwrecked
without our Elvis mobiles.
Now, Beck, It took us
two hours to get ready.
It'll be very spontaneous
to go to the Harley shop
and Aunt Ida's. Let's go.
Jess, let's face it.
Life as we knew it is no more.
Next time we want
to be spontaneous..
...let's plan ahead.
[doorbell rings]
Honey, could you get that?
- Ha, ha, ha
- Ha! Kidding.
Aunt Ida!
We were just
coming to see you!
Becky, that's not funny.
Hi, Jesse.
Hi, Aunt Ida.
Beautiful new 'do.
I was in the neighborhood.
Turn your hat around.
You look like a hoodlum.
[babbling]
- Hi, Michelle.
Want to buy a bike?
It's only 50 cents.
No, thanks.
Hey, Joey told us
you fell off your bike.
So, why don't we give it
one last shot
of you sitting on the bike
that you're never
gonna ride again.
Is this a trick?
Michelle,
bubbie, baby.
If we wanted to trick you
we'd think of something
a little more clever than asking
you to sit on your bike.
Now, sit on your bike.
Here, I'll hold you.
Steph, how does she look?
I think the light would be
better way over there.
Steph, you are so right.
Now, Michelle,
I'll hold you steady.
You just start pedaling.
Stop the bike.
I want to get off.
Alright. Hop off.
This was a trick.
Shame on you!
We're sorry, Michelle.
We just thought you should
give your bike another chance.
Maybe you didn't
see this scrape.
Girls, can I talk
to Michelle for a minute?
- Sure.
- Good luck.
Michelle, it's obvious
you're way too smart
to fall for a trick.
It's very obvious.
Would you go for a bribe?
Never!
What do you got?
Well, if you
give me a chance
to teach you how to ride.
You can have your
very own copy of
"The Little Mermaid".
No, thank you.
It's your favorite movie.
It's on cable all month.
Look, Michelle.
I'm sorry that
you had an accident
but I had to let go.
That's how you learn.
Otherwise every kid
you see riding a bike
would have a grownup
hanging on the back.
That's better than
falling in a bush.
I'm gonna tell you something
that I should've told you
before we ever started.
You don't know
what you're doing?
No, that learning to ride
a bike is hard work.
No matter how many times you
fall you have to keep trying
because once you get it right
it's really worth it.
Are you sure about this?
Hey, come on. You and I
are buds. We go way back.
Until you wiped out,
did I ever let you down?
No.
Well than, how about giving your
old pal Joey one more chance?
Okay, old pal.
Attagirl.
Kiss.
You're not gonna
let me go, right?
No way, not until
you say so.
Okay, let's do it!
Alright.
You're doing it, Michelle.
- Let go!
- Are you sure?
Let go!
Are you really,
really sure?
I said let go!
(Joey)
'Way to go!'
I'm not in the bush!
Michelle, I'm so proud of you.
You did it all by yourself!
Uh-uh, Joey.
I did it with you.
Wanna go for
another ride?
Okay, let's go!
Okay, Michelle,
here we go.
I'll race you home.
Try to catch me.
Uh, Michelle, Michelle!
Michelle!
Not so fast!
Wait for me!
♪ Ahhh ahh ahh ahhh ♪
[theme music]
♪ Ahhh ahh ahh ahhh ♪
♪ Dooby do ba ba dow ♪♪