1
00:01:14,941 --> 00:01:16,203
Uh...
2
00:01:16,276 --> 00:01:18,210
I got to go.
3
00:01:18,278 --> 00:01:19,870
I got to go.
4
00:01:21,581 --> 00:01:23,572
I got to catch
a plane.
5
00:02:06,326 --> 00:02:08,590
Two hours of staring
at material
6
00:02:08,661 --> 00:02:11,425
to decide to reconvene
after the holidays.
7
00:02:11,498 --> 00:02:14,058
They're selling cosmetics,
not curing cancer.
8
00:02:14,134 --> 00:02:17,103
Why aren't you going
to the airport?
9
00:02:17,170 --> 00:02:20,731
Why bust my ass?
Take the 8:00 flight with me.
10
00:02:20,807 --> 00:02:23,742
I told Susan
I'd be home by 9:00.
11
00:02:23,810 --> 00:02:25,038
That's you.
12
00:02:26,613 --> 00:02:29,548
I left my gloves
in Brian's office.
13
00:02:29,616 --> 00:02:32,551
I don't need them
to fly home.
14
00:02:32,619 --> 00:02:35,952
Would you pick them up?
I'll get them tomorrow.
15
00:02:36,022 --> 00:02:37,546
Have a good holiday.
16
00:02:37,624 --> 00:02:39,057
See you in Chicago.
17
00:02:39,125 --> 00:02:41,025
You'll never
make the 6:00.
18
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:40,584
Ha ha!
19
00:03:49,495 --> 00:03:50,553
Taxi!
20
00:03:50,630 --> 00:03:52,120
Oof!
21
00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:20,590
Cab! Cab!
22
00:04:26,599 --> 00:04:28,328
Sir?
23
00:04:28,401 --> 00:04:30,028
Sir? Sir?
24
00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:31,536
Excuse me.
25
00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:34,539
Could I appeal
to your good nature
26
00:04:34,607 --> 00:04:36,973
and ask you
for your cab?
27
00:04:37,043 --> 00:04:40,012
I don't have a good nature.
Excuse me.
28
00:04:40,079 --> 00:04:41,341
Come on!
29
00:04:41,414 --> 00:04:44,042
Could I offer you $ 10?
30
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:45,982
20. I'll give you $20.
31
00:04:46,052 --> 00:04:47,713
I'll take 50.
32
00:04:48,955 --> 00:04:49,979
All right.
33
00:04:50,056 --> 00:04:53,025
Anyone who would
pay $50 for a cab
34
00:04:53,092 --> 00:04:55,151
would certainly pay $ 75.
35
00:04:55,228 --> 00:04:57,287
Not necessarily.
36
00:04:58,364 --> 00:05:00,264
All right, 75.
37
00:05:00,333 --> 00:05:01,595
You're a thief.
38
00:05:01,668 --> 00:05:03,431
Close. I'm an attorney.
39
00:05:05,905 --> 00:05:07,566
Have a happy holiday.
40
00:05:07,640 --> 00:05:08,971
This will help.
41
00:05:16,249 --> 00:05:17,876
Hey! Hey!
42
00:05:17,950 --> 00:05:19,008
Hey!
43
00:05:19,085 --> 00:05:20,416
Hey, that's my cab!
44
00:05:20,486 --> 00:05:21,919
That's my cab!
45
00:05:21,988 --> 00:05:23,387
Pull over! Pull over!
46
00:05:23,456 --> 00:05:24,855
All right. Pull over!
47
00:05:24,924 --> 00:05:27,222
That's my cab!
48
00:05:27,293 --> 00:05:28,726
Pull over, buddy!
49
00:05:28,795 --> 00:05:31,229
You're messing
with the wrong guy!
50
00:05:37,370 --> 00:05:39,964
This is my cab! Out!
51
00:05:59,992 --> 00:06:01,152
Excuse me.
52
00:06:02,729 --> 00:06:04,162
Excuse me.
53
00:06:04,230 --> 00:06:05,322
Excuse me.
54
00:06:09,736 --> 00:06:10,794
Excuse me.
55
00:06:13,740 --> 00:06:17,540
Your attention please.
Your attention please.
56
00:06:17,610 --> 00:06:19,407
Mid-Central flight 909
57
00:06:19,479 --> 00:06:22,175
to Chicago O'hare
has been delayed.
58
00:06:22,248 --> 00:06:24,614
All passengers wishing
further information
59
00:06:24,684 --> 00:06:26,675
please contact
the ticket agent.
60
00:06:26,753 --> 00:06:28,550
When are Grandma and Grandpa
61
00:06:28,621 --> 00:06:30,384
and Grandma
and Grandpa coming?
62
00:06:30,456 --> 00:06:32,185
They'll be here
tomorrow, honey.
63
00:06:32,258 --> 00:06:33,850
Mom?
64
00:06:33,926 --> 00:06:37,191
You think Grandpa Walt
will give me a noogie?
65
00:06:37,263 --> 00:06:39,595
Of course he'll
give you noogies.
66
00:06:39,665 --> 00:06:41,496
It means he loves you.
67
00:06:41,567 --> 00:06:43,262
Why don't I get noogies?
68
00:06:43,336 --> 00:06:45,304
Because you get
Indian burns.
69
00:06:45,371 --> 00:06:47,703
But I prefer noogies.
70
00:06:49,375 --> 00:06:51,809
Keep an eye on your brother.
71
00:06:53,980 --> 00:06:54,947
Hello.
72
00:06:55,014 --> 00:06:56,447
Who is it?
73
00:06:56,516 --> 00:06:57,949
Shh. Where are you?
74
00:06:58,017 --> 00:06:59,541
Who is it?
75
00:06:59,619 --> 00:07:01,280
Shh! It's Daddy.
76
00:07:01,354 --> 00:07:02,412
Flight delay.
77
00:07:02,488 --> 00:07:04,786
When will you be in?
78
00:07:04,857 --> 00:07:06,552
No later than 10:00.
79
00:07:06,626 --> 00:07:08,594
I'll wait up for you.
80
00:07:43,696 --> 00:07:45,630
I know you, don't I?
81
00:07:45,698 --> 00:07:47,632
I'm usually
good with names,
82
00:07:47,700 --> 00:07:49,167
but I've forgotten yours.
83
00:07:49,235 --> 00:07:51,499
You stole my cab.
84
00:07:52,705 --> 00:07:55,640
I've never stolen
anything in my life.
85
00:07:55,708 --> 00:07:58,643
I hailed a cab
on Park Avenue today.
86
00:07:58,711 --> 00:08:01,578
Before I could get in,
you stole it.
87
00:08:04,317 --> 00:08:07,753
You're the guy
who tried to get my cab.
88
00:08:07,820 --> 00:08:10,254
I knew I knew you. Yeah.
89
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:13,258
You scared the bejesus
out of me.
90
00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:21,266
It was awful easy getting a cab
during rush hour.
91
00:08:21,334 --> 00:08:22,926
Forget it.
92
00:08:23,002 --> 00:08:24,993
I can't forget it.
93
00:08:25,071 --> 00:08:26,504
I am sorry.
94
00:08:26,572 --> 00:08:29,336
I had no idea
that was your cab.
95
00:08:29,408 --> 00:08:32,275
Let me make it
up to you somehow.
96
00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:35,280
How about a hot dog
and a beer?
97
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:36,872
Uh, no, thanks.
98
00:08:36,949 --> 00:08:38,780
Just a hot dog, then.
99
00:08:38,851 --> 00:08:41,285
I'm picky about what I eat.
100
00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:42,446
Some coffee.
101
00:08:42,522 --> 00:08:43,489
No.
102
00:08:43,556 --> 00:08:44,454
Milk?
103
00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:45,616
No.
104
00:08:45,691 --> 00:08:48,125
Soda? Some tea?
Lifesavers? Slurpee?
105
00:08:48,194 --> 00:08:49,661
Sir, please.
106
00:08:49,729 --> 00:08:52,289
Just let me know. I'm here.
107
00:08:52,365 --> 00:08:54,299
I knew I knew you.
108
00:08:56,068 --> 00:08:59,435
You should have discussed this
with the ticket agent.
109
00:08:59,505 --> 00:09:02,303
I didn't know
he put me in coach.
110
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:04,969
I'm sorry.
First class is full.
111
00:09:05,044 --> 00:09:07,376
I have a first class ticket.
112
00:09:07,446 --> 00:09:09,971
You have a coach
seat assignment.
113
00:09:10,049 --> 00:09:11,380
Hi, Larry.
114
00:09:11,450 --> 00:09:12,382
Hi, Liz.
115
00:09:14,954 --> 00:09:16,387
Here OK?
116
00:09:16,455 --> 00:09:18,389
Oh, here, there.
Anywhere's fine.
117
00:09:18,457 --> 00:09:19,549
Pardon me.
118
00:09:23,462 --> 00:09:26,454
You'll get a refund
on the difference.
119
00:09:26,532 --> 00:09:29,399
I want a seat
in first class
120
00:09:29,468 --> 00:09:32,494
where I was booked
over a month ago.
121
00:09:32,572 --> 00:09:34,699
I've had
enough of you.
122
00:09:34,774 --> 00:09:36,207
Now take your seat.
123
00:09:36,275 --> 00:09:38,209
You've had enough of me?
124
00:09:38,277 --> 00:09:41,144
First you delay me,
then you bump me.
125
00:09:41,213 --> 00:09:42,703
What happens next?
126
00:09:42,782 --> 00:09:45,512
Is this a coincidence or what?
127
00:09:45,585 --> 00:09:47,143
Have a seat.
128
00:10:08,507 --> 00:10:10,441
I never did
introduce myself.
129
00:10:10,509 --> 00:10:11,942
Del Griffith.
130
00:10:12,011 --> 00:10:13,444
American Light
and Fixture...
131
00:10:13,512 --> 00:10:16,447
Director of sales,
shower curtain ring division.
132
00:10:17,783 --> 00:10:20,445
I sell shower
curtain rings.
133
00:10:20,519 --> 00:10:21,952
Best in the world.
134
00:10:25,524 --> 00:10:27,458
And you are?
135
00:10:27,526 --> 00:10:28,959
Uh, Neal Page.
136
00:10:29,028 --> 00:10:32,589
Neal Page.
Pleased to meet you, Neal Page.
137
00:10:32,665 --> 00:10:36,465
So what do you do
for a living, Neal Page?
138
00:10:36,535 --> 00:10:37,627
Marketing.
139
00:10:37,703 --> 00:10:38,795
Marketing? Super.
140
00:10:38,871 --> 00:10:40,463
Super. Fabulous.
141
00:10:40,539 --> 00:10:41,972
Isn't that nice?
142
00:10:42,041 --> 00:10:44,475
I don't want
to be rude, but...
143
00:10:44,543 --> 00:10:47,103
I'm not much
of a conversationalist.
144
00:10:47,179 --> 00:10:49,477
I'd like to finish
this article.
145
00:10:49,548 --> 00:10:51,482
A friend wrote it, so...
146
00:10:51,550 --> 00:10:53,484
Don't let me stop you.
147
00:10:53,552 --> 00:10:55,486
Last thing I want to be
148
00:10:55,554 --> 00:10:56,987
is an annoying
blabbermouth.
149
00:10:59,392 --> 00:11:00,825
Nothing grinds my gears
150
00:11:00,893 --> 00:11:02,258
worse than
some chowderhead
151
00:11:02,328 --> 00:11:04,558
who can't keep
his trap shut.
152
00:11:04,630 --> 00:11:07,428
Catch me running
off at the mouth,
153
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:08,899
give me a poke.
154
00:11:16,375 --> 00:11:17,774
Ohh!
155
00:11:18,911 --> 00:11:20,435
Ohh, that feels good.
156
00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:22,447
Oh, God,
I'm telling you.
157
00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:24,506
My dogs are barking today.
158
00:11:24,583 --> 00:11:25,880
Whew!
159
00:11:28,154 --> 00:11:30,122
Ohh!
160
00:11:32,858 --> 00:11:34,291
That feels better.
161
00:12:00,553 --> 00:12:02,919
Six bucks and my right nut
162
00:12:02,988 --> 00:12:05,422
says we're not
landing in Chicago.
163
00:12:23,509 --> 00:12:24,441
Hello.
164
00:12:24,510 --> 00:12:25,442
Hi.
165
00:12:25,511 --> 00:12:26,978
Where are you?
166
00:12:27,046 --> 00:12:28,445
I'm in Wichita.
167
00:12:28,514 --> 00:12:29,446
Wichita, Kansas?
168
00:12:29,515 --> 00:12:31,881
Are you all right?
What happened?
169
00:12:31,951 --> 00:12:34,385
We couldn't land
in Chicago.
170
00:12:34,453 --> 00:12:37,388
I don't understand
what Wichita has to do
171
00:12:37,456 --> 00:12:39,390
with a snowstorm
in Chicago?
172
00:12:39,458 --> 00:12:41,426
What's going on, Neal?
173
00:12:41,494 --> 00:12:43,894
We took off
from New York,
174
00:12:43,963 --> 00:12:46,523
they closed Chicago,
we landed here.
175
00:12:48,467 --> 00:12:49,900
Neal.
176
00:12:54,473 --> 00:12:56,566
Trouble on the home front?
177
00:12:56,642 --> 00:12:59,941
I really don't think that's
any of your concern.
178
00:13:00,012 --> 00:13:02,845
The finest line
a man will walk
179
00:13:02,915 --> 00:13:05,850
is between success at work
and success at home.
180
00:13:05,918 --> 00:13:09,513
I got a motto...
like your work, love your wife.
181
00:13:09,588 --> 00:13:11,852
Well, I'll remember that.
182
00:13:12,925 --> 00:13:14,688
What's the flight situation?
183
00:13:14,760 --> 00:13:15,852
Simple.
184
00:13:15,928 --> 00:13:18,863
No way we'll get out
of here tonight.
185
00:13:18,931 --> 00:13:20,364
We'd have more luck
186
00:13:20,432 --> 00:13:23,367
playing pickup sticks
with our butt cheeks.
187
00:13:23,435 --> 00:13:25,369
We'll find out soon enough.
188
00:13:25,437 --> 00:13:28,497
By the time the airline
cancels this flight,
189
00:13:28,574 --> 00:13:30,007
which they will eventually,
190
00:13:30,075 --> 00:13:33,772
you'd have a better chance finding
a three-legged ballerina
191
00:13:33,846 --> 00:13:35,370
than a hotel room.
192
00:13:35,447 --> 00:13:37,642
I could be stuck here?
193
00:13:37,716 --> 00:13:40,014
I'm saying
you are stuck here.
194
00:13:42,421 --> 00:13:44,048
Ladies and gentlemen,
195
00:13:44,123 --> 00:13:46,557
may I have
your attention, please.
196
00:13:46,625 --> 00:13:48,058
I'm sorry to announce
197
00:13:48,127 --> 00:13:50,061
that we're canceling
flight 909
198
00:13:50,129 --> 00:13:52,757
due to severe weather
in Chicago.
199
00:13:52,832 --> 00:13:54,390
Hi, I was wondering
200
00:13:54,466 --> 00:13:57,731
if you had any rooms
available for tonight?
201
00:13:57,803 --> 00:13:59,202
Anything.
Anything will do.
202
00:13:59,271 --> 00:14:00,397
I'm sorry.
203
00:14:00,472 --> 00:14:01,837
Is there another motel...
204
00:14:08,914 --> 00:14:09,846
Neal.
205
00:14:11,116 --> 00:14:12,811
Hi.
206
00:14:12,885 --> 00:14:14,352
Well?
207
00:14:15,421 --> 00:14:17,753
Welcome to Wichita.
208
00:14:17,823 --> 00:14:20,348
Did you book a room yet?
209
00:14:20,426 --> 00:14:23,020
I, uh, couldn't
get in anywhere.
210
00:14:23,095 --> 00:14:25,359
When we arrived,
you called home.
211
00:14:25,431 --> 00:14:27,228
I called
the Braidwood Inn.
212
00:14:27,299 --> 00:14:29,130
I missed that one.
213
00:14:29,201 --> 00:14:30,691
I got an idea.
214
00:14:30,769 --> 00:14:32,202
I know the manager.
215
00:14:32,271 --> 00:14:35,240
If you pick up
the cab fare,
216
00:14:35,307 --> 00:14:38,367
I'll make sure
you get a room.
217
00:14:38,444 --> 00:14:39,877
Umm...
218
00:14:44,450 --> 00:14:46,384
Yeah. Yeah, sure. Great.
219
00:14:46,452 --> 00:14:47,578
All right.
220
00:14:47,653 --> 00:14:50,417
Grab an end
of this thing, will you?
221
00:14:50,489 --> 00:14:52,218
Thanks a lot.
222
00:14:54,360 --> 00:14:56,351
Is this your trunk?
223
00:14:56,428 --> 00:14:59,556
Yeah. You should try
lugging this thing
224
00:14:59,632 --> 00:15:01,623
around New York City.
225
00:15:11,610 --> 00:15:14,010
# Well,
it takes you up #
226
00:15:15,247 --> 00:15:18,080
# And it
beats you down, yeah #
227
00:15:19,184 --> 00:15:21,015
# It plays around #
228
00:15:22,221 --> 00:15:24,985
# And it spends
your money... ##
229
00:15:26,725 --> 00:15:29,660
Where the hell
is the motel?
230
00:15:31,430 --> 00:15:33,523
Doobie,
is it much farther?
231
00:15:33,599 --> 00:15:34,896
Not much.
232
00:15:34,967 --> 00:15:37,367
Why didn't you
take the interstate?
233
00:15:37,436 --> 00:15:39,870
Your friend
has never been here,
234
00:15:39,939 --> 00:15:42,840
so I figured he'd like
to look around.
235
00:15:42,908 --> 00:15:44,876
There's nothing
on the interstate.
236
00:15:44,944 --> 00:15:47,435
It's the middle
of the night.
237
00:15:47,513 --> 00:15:50,380
I know, but he's
proud of his town.
238
00:15:50,449 --> 00:15:52,917
That's a rare thing
these days.
239
00:16:06,899 --> 00:16:09,834
Take care of the luggage,
will you, Doobie?
240
00:16:09,902 --> 00:16:11,335
OK, Del.
241
00:16:13,305 --> 00:16:15,330
Get off of me.
242
00:16:19,912 --> 00:16:21,345
Stick with me.
243
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:35,688
Evening, Gus.
244
00:16:38,764 --> 00:16:41,733
Del Griffith,
how the hell are you?
245
00:16:41,800 --> 00:16:45,201
Still a million bucks shy
of being a millionaire.
246
00:16:46,438 --> 00:16:49,703
Gus, meet an old friend.
Neal Page, Gus Mooney.
247
00:16:49,775 --> 00:16:52,005
Glad to meet you, Nick.
248
00:16:52,077 --> 00:16:55,945
I told my friend you'd
give him a room tonight.
249
00:16:56,015 --> 00:16:59,178
Do you have
a major credit card?
250
00:17:00,486 --> 00:17:03,250
Do you still honor those discount
credit cards?
251
00:17:03,322 --> 00:17:06,120
I'll have to charge you
for a double,
252
00:17:06,191 --> 00:17:09,126
but with the discount,
it'll come out even.
253
00:17:09,194 --> 00:17:11,162
We're a pretty good team.
254
00:17:11,230 --> 00:17:14,131
We were on our way
to Chicago,
255
00:17:14,199 --> 00:17:17,032
and the storm
brought us here.
256
00:17:17,102 --> 00:17:20,594
I know.
I must have half your flight here.
257
00:17:20,672 --> 00:17:23,140
Well, I guess you're all fixed,
258
00:17:23,208 --> 00:17:25,802
so, uh, there you are.
259
00:17:25,878 --> 00:17:28,278
Last room in the complex.
260
00:17:28,347 --> 00:17:29,814
You mean sh-share?
261
00:17:30,916 --> 00:17:32,645
Hey, easy on that.
262
00:17:32,718 --> 00:17:34,151
OK.
263
00:18:01,747 --> 00:18:04,614
Hell of a cab ride,
wasn't it?
264
00:18:04,683 --> 00:18:08,119
Yeah, you don't see
cabs like that too often.
265
00:18:16,328 --> 00:18:18,125
Want to take a shower?
266
00:18:18,197 --> 00:18:19,129
No!
267
00:18:19,198 --> 00:18:22,133
I meant, did you want to go first?
268
00:18:22,201 --> 00:18:23,634
You-you thought...
269
00:18:23,702 --> 00:18:27,138
I wouldn't...
What do you think I am?
270
00:18:27,206 --> 00:18:28,468
Gee, that's funny.
271
00:18:53,232 --> 00:18:54,665
Ah. Ah.
272
00:18:54,733 --> 00:18:57,759
Oh, come...
come on.
273
00:19:09,181 --> 00:19:11,012
Ah! Ouch, ouch, ouch!
274
00:19:19,191 --> 00:19:21,159
To wear a pompadour...
275
00:20:25,757 --> 00:20:27,190
Excuse me.
276
00:20:32,764 --> 00:20:34,698
I'd switch pillows with you,
277
00:20:34,766 --> 00:20:36,700
but I'm allergic to sponge.
278
00:20:36,768 --> 00:20:39,703
I'd be sneezing all night
with that thing.
279
00:20:39,771 --> 00:20:42,706
That's why I carry
my own pillow.
280
00:20:42,774 --> 00:20:44,207
It's hypoallergenic.
281
00:20:50,882 --> 00:20:52,281
I had no idea
282
00:20:52,351 --> 00:20:55,286
those beer cans
would blow like that.
283
00:20:55,354 --> 00:20:58,289
You left them
on a vibrating bed.
284
00:20:58,357 --> 00:21:00,791
What did you think
would happen?
285
00:21:00,859 --> 00:21:03,225
It just didn't
occur to me.
286
00:21:03,295 --> 00:21:05,229
It didn't
occur to you,
287
00:21:05,297 --> 00:21:08,733
so I have to sleep
in a puddle of beer.
288
00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:10,233
You want to switch?
289
00:21:10,302 --> 00:21:11,860
I just want to sleep.
290
00:21:12,304 --> 00:21:14,238
Me, too.
I am bushed.
291
00:21:14,306 --> 00:21:15,739
Good night.
292
00:21:15,807 --> 00:21:17,240
Good night.
293
00:21:47,005 --> 00:21:49,269
I'll have to burn the sheets!
294
00:21:49,341 --> 00:21:52,777
What if the shoe
was on the other foot?
295
00:21:52,844 --> 00:21:54,607
I'd go barefoot!
296
00:22:21,006 --> 00:22:23,236
Traffic is resuming
at O'Hare field,
297
00:22:23,308 --> 00:22:25,071
and flights will be
moving shortly.
298
00:22:42,828 --> 00:22:44,261
Sorry.
299
00:22:59,111 --> 00:23:00,840
Goddamn!
300
00:23:00,912 --> 00:23:02,243
What, what?
301
00:23:02,314 --> 00:23:03,781
That's it!
302
00:23:03,849 --> 00:23:06,716
Without clearing my sinuses,
I'll snore all night.
303
00:23:06,785 --> 00:23:10,744
If your kid spills his milk,
do you slap him?
304
00:23:10,822 --> 00:23:13,256
What-what-what is that
supposed to mean?
305
00:23:13,325 --> 00:23:15,793
You're not a very
tolerant person.
306
00:23:15,861 --> 00:23:18,295
You've bugged me
since New York,
307
00:23:18,363 --> 00:23:20,228
starting with
stealing my cab.
308
00:23:20,298 --> 00:23:21,925
God, you're a tight-ass.
309
00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:24,798
How would you like
a mouthful of teeth?
310
00:23:24,870 --> 00:23:26,394
Oh, and hostile, too.
311
00:23:26,471 --> 00:23:27,870
Nice personality combination...
312
00:23:27,939 --> 00:23:29,463
hostile and intolerant.
313
00:23:29,541 --> 00:23:30,803
That's borderline criminal.
314
00:23:30,876 --> 00:23:31,900
Screw you.
315
00:23:31,977 --> 00:23:34,810
You spilled beer
all over the bed,
316
00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:36,814
you mess up
the bathroom...
317
00:23:36,882 --> 00:23:38,315
Who let you stay?
318
00:23:38,383 --> 00:23:40,317
I even let you pay,
319
00:23:40,385 --> 00:23:43,081
so you wouldn't feel
like an intruder.
320
00:23:43,155 --> 00:23:44,087
An intruder?
321
00:23:44,156 --> 00:23:46,681
Right. You ruined a nice trip.
322
00:23:46,758 --> 00:23:49,693
Who talked my ear off
on the plane?
323
00:23:49,761 --> 00:23:51,695
Who was that?
I'm curious.
324
00:23:51,763 --> 00:23:55,324
Who told you to book a room?
I did.
325
00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:56,833
You're an ungrateful jackass.
326
00:23:56,902 --> 00:23:58,335
Sleep in the lobby.
327
00:23:58,403 --> 00:24:00,997
I hope you wake up so stiff
328
00:24:01,072 --> 00:24:02,562
you can't even move.
329
00:24:02,641 --> 00:24:05,769
You got a free cab,
a free room,
330
00:24:05,844 --> 00:24:07,778
and someone
who will listen
331
00:24:07,846 --> 00:24:09,780
to your boring stories.
332
00:24:09,848 --> 00:24:12,282
Didn't you notice on the plane
333
00:24:12,350 --> 00:24:13,817
when you started talking,
334
00:24:13,885 --> 00:24:16,319
I started reading
the vomit bag?
335
00:24:16,388 --> 00:24:18,822
Didn't that
give you some clue
336
00:24:18,890 --> 00:24:21,324
that this guy's
not enjoying it?
337
00:24:21,393 --> 00:24:22,826
Everything's not an anecdote.
338
00:24:22,894 --> 00:24:24,384
You have to discriminate.
339
00:24:24,463 --> 00:24:26,931
You choose things
that are funny
340
00:24:26,998 --> 00:24:28,522
or mildly amusing
341
00:24:28,600 --> 00:24:30,033
or interesting.
342
00:24:30,101 --> 00:24:31,227
You're a miracle.
343
00:24:31,303 --> 00:24:33,863
Your stories
have none of that.
344
00:24:33,939 --> 00:24:36,464
They're not even
amusing accidentally.
345
00:24:36,541 --> 00:24:37,974
Honey, meet Del Griffith.
346
00:24:38,043 --> 00:24:39,977
He's got some
amusing anecdotes.
347
00:24:40,045 --> 00:24:44,573
Here's a gun so you can
blow your brains out.
348
00:24:44,649 --> 00:24:46,617
You'll thank me for it.
349
00:24:46,685 --> 00:24:50,416
I could tolerate
any insurance seminar.
350
00:24:50,489 --> 00:24:54,892
For days,
I could listen to them go on and on.
351
00:24:54,960 --> 00:24:58,054
They'd say,
"How can you stand it?"
352
00:24:58,129 --> 00:25:01,963
And I'd say,
"'Cause I've been with Del Griffith.
353
00:25:02,033 --> 00:25:03,830
I can take anything. "
354
00:25:03,902 --> 00:25:05,836
You know what they'd say?
355
00:25:05,904 --> 00:25:07,838
"I know what you mean.
356
00:25:07,906 --> 00:25:09,897
The shower curtain
ring guy. "
357
00:25:09,975 --> 00:25:13,206
It's like going on a date
358
00:25:13,278 --> 00:25:15,212
with a Chatty Cathy doll.
359
00:25:15,280 --> 00:25:18,249
There should be
a string on your chest
360
00:25:18,316 --> 00:25:19,749
that I pull out.
361
00:25:19,818 --> 00:25:22,787
Except I wouldn't
pull it out, you would.
362
00:25:22,854 --> 00:25:24,344
Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
363
00:25:24,422 --> 00:25:25,889
By the way,
364
00:25:25,957 --> 00:25:29,017
when you're telling
these little stories,
365
00:25:29,094 --> 00:25:30,755
here's a good idea.
366
00:25:30,829 --> 00:25:32,262
Have a point.
367
00:25:32,330 --> 00:25:35,265
It makes it more interesting
for the listener.
368
00:25:49,214 --> 00:25:51,148
You want to hurt me?
369
00:25:51,216 --> 00:25:54,151
Go ahead if it
makes you feel better.
370
00:25:54,219 --> 00:25:55,846
I'm an easy target.
371
00:25:58,223 --> 00:25:59,952
Yeah, you're right.
372
00:26:00,025 --> 00:26:01,788
I talk too much.
373
00:26:01,860 --> 00:26:04,090
I also listen too much.
374
00:26:04,162 --> 00:26:08,758
I could be a cold-hearted
cynic like you,
375
00:26:08,833 --> 00:26:11,825
but I don't like to
hurt people's feelings.
376
00:26:11,903 --> 00:26:15,100
Well, you think
what you want about me.
377
00:26:15,173 --> 00:26:16,640
I'm not changing.
378
00:26:16,708 --> 00:26:18,676
I like... I like me.
379
00:26:18,743 --> 00:26:20,802
My wife likes me.
380
00:26:20,879 --> 00:26:23,006
My customers like me.
381
00:26:23,081 --> 00:26:25,140
'Cause I'm the real article.
382
00:26:25,216 --> 00:26:28,344
What you see
is what you get.
383
00:28:46,991 --> 00:28:48,117
Del.
384
00:28:48,193 --> 00:28:49,922
Hmm? Yeah.
385
00:28:49,994 --> 00:28:52,428
Why did you kiss my ear?
386
00:28:54,032 --> 00:28:56,660
Why are you holding my hand?
387
00:28:58,369 --> 00:29:00,269
Where's your other hand?
388
00:29:00,338 --> 00:29:02,169
Between two pillows.
389
00:29:03,374 --> 00:29:05,274
Those aren't pillows!
390
00:29:05,343 --> 00:29:06,537
Aah!
391
00:29:06,611 --> 00:29:07,578
Oh, no!
392
00:29:07,645 --> 00:29:10,580
Ooh!
393
00:29:10,648 --> 00:29:11,615
Oh!
394
00:29:11,683 --> 00:29:13,514
Oh! Oh!
395
00:29:23,895 --> 00:29:26,329
See that Bears' game
last week?
396
00:29:26,397 --> 00:29:27,955
Hell of a game.
397
00:29:28,032 --> 00:29:30,227
They're going all the way.
398
00:29:30,301 --> 00:29:33,134
Ohh, yeow.
399
00:29:59,030 --> 00:30:01,965
Neal, take my socks
out of the sink
400
00:30:02,033 --> 00:30:04,524
if you're going
to brush your teeth.
401
00:30:10,608 --> 00:30:12,041
Where are you?
402
00:30:12,110 --> 00:30:13,543
I'm in Wichita.
403
00:30:13,611 --> 00:30:15,169
I'm at a motel
404
00:30:15,246 --> 00:30:18,511
with this guy
I met on the plane.
405
00:30:18,583 --> 00:30:21,484
You shared a motel room
with a stranger?
406
00:30:21,553 --> 00:30:22,850
Are you crazy?
407
00:30:22,921 --> 00:30:24,149
I'm getting there.
408
00:30:24,222 --> 00:30:26,156
Did you call the airline?
409
00:30:26,224 --> 00:30:29,591
I have a good chance
of getting on standby.
410
00:30:29,661 --> 00:30:31,094
If they told you
411
00:30:31,162 --> 00:30:33,027
wolverines make
good house pets,
412
00:30:33,097 --> 00:30:34,394
would you believe them?
413
00:30:34,465 --> 00:30:36,899
I'm not spending
Thanksgiving in Wichita.
414
00:30:36,968 --> 00:30:38,458
I'll get home.
415
00:30:38,536 --> 00:30:39,935
Mmm.
416
00:30:40,004 --> 00:30:41,437
Not by airplane.
417
00:30:41,506 --> 00:30:44,942
They got 18 hours of air traffic
backed up.
418
00:30:45,009 --> 00:30:47,944
We're going to be having
our turkey roll
419
00:30:48,012 --> 00:30:49,775
right here.
420
00:30:49,848 --> 00:30:52,282
If we wait
for the flight.
421
00:30:52,350 --> 00:30:54,716
How else can we get home?
422
00:30:54,786 --> 00:30:57,721
Burt Dingman.
He works for the railroad.
423
00:30:57,789 --> 00:31:00,724
I sold them all their
shower curtain rings.
424
00:31:00,792 --> 00:31:02,487
He owes me a favor.
425
00:31:04,929 --> 00:31:07,864
I'll get that.
I paid for everything else.
426
00:31:07,932 --> 00:31:09,399
Why break precedent?
427
00:31:09,467 --> 00:31:12,061
You're making me feel
like a freeloader.
428
00:31:12,136 --> 00:31:15,071
Get me on the train,
we're square.
429
00:31:15,139 --> 00:31:17,869
You got it.
That's the easy part.
430
00:31:21,880 --> 00:31:23,848
What?
431
00:31:23,915 --> 00:31:26,748
You know goddamn well what.
432
00:31:26,818 --> 00:31:29,150
I'm sorry. I don't.
433
00:31:29,220 --> 00:31:32,519
I had over
$ 700 in here.
434
00:31:32,590 --> 00:31:36,526
I'm a lot of things,
but I'm not a thief.
435
00:31:36,594 --> 00:31:39,563
You went into my stuff
last night, right?
436
00:31:39,631 --> 00:31:41,565
I didn't take your money.
437
00:31:41,633 --> 00:31:43,066
I had over $ 700.
438
00:31:43,134 --> 00:31:46,103
You went into
my wallet for pizza.
439
00:31:46,170 --> 00:31:49,071
Just maybe
when you went into...
440
00:31:49,140 --> 00:31:50,232
Count it!
441
00:31:50,308 --> 00:31:52,742
Like you'd keep it
in there.
442
00:31:52,810 --> 00:31:54,243
There's $263 in there.
443
00:31:54,312 --> 00:31:57,770
If there's more,
you can call me a thief.
444
00:31:57,849 --> 00:31:59,146
Count it!
445
00:31:59,217 --> 00:32:01,185
263, right?
446
00:32:04,355 --> 00:32:05,515
Empty.
447
00:32:05,590 --> 00:32:06,557
What?
448
00:32:13,131 --> 00:32:14,689
We were robbed.
449
00:32:14,766 --> 00:32:16,791
Do you think so?
450
00:32:16,935 --> 00:32:18,562
I've been thinking.
451
00:32:18,636 --> 00:32:20,069
What we're dealing with
452
00:32:20,138 --> 00:32:21,867
is a smalltime crook.
453
00:32:21,940 --> 00:32:24,374
He didn't take
the credit cards,
454
00:32:24,442 --> 00:32:26,376
so we charge
our way home.
455
00:32:26,444 --> 00:32:29,242
I've got a Visa
and a gasoline card.
456
00:32:29,314 --> 00:32:31,248
Oh, and a Neiman-Marcus card
457
00:32:31,316 --> 00:32:34,183
in case we want
to buy a gift.
458
00:32:34,252 --> 00:32:35,617
What have you got?
459
00:32:35,687 --> 00:32:38,087
Chalmer's Big and Tall
Men's Shoppe,
460
00:32:38,156 --> 00:32:40,784
a seven-outlet chain in
the Pacific Northwest.
461
00:32:40,858 --> 00:32:43,452
Unfortunately,
it does us no good here.
462
00:32:43,528 --> 00:32:45,962
Get me to the train station,
463
00:32:46,030 --> 00:32:48,624
and I'll take care
of everything else.
464
00:32:48,700 --> 00:32:51,066
Gus' son is picking us up.
465
00:32:55,540 --> 00:32:57,872
This is not him, is it?
466
00:32:57,942 --> 00:32:59,739
Gee, I hope not.
467
00:33:34,412 --> 00:33:35,845
Are you Gus' son?
468
00:33:35,913 --> 00:33:37,505
I'm Owen.
469
00:33:39,984 --> 00:33:42,714
You the shower
curtain fella?
470
00:33:42,787 --> 00:33:44,812
Yeah. Yeah.
Del Griffith.
471
00:33:44,889 --> 00:33:46,413
How are you?
472
00:33:46,491 --> 00:33:48,857
This is Neal Page
from Chicago.
473
00:33:48,926 --> 00:33:49,893
Hi.
474
00:33:49,961 --> 00:33:52,020
Pleased to meet you both.
475
00:33:58,903 --> 00:34:02,737
I'm to drive you to Wichita
to catch a train?
476
00:34:02,807 --> 00:34:04,365
Yeah, we'd appreciate it.
477
00:34:04,442 --> 00:34:07,309
Train don't run
out of Wichita.
478
00:34:07,378 --> 00:34:10,176
'Lessen you're a hog
or cattle.
479
00:34:13,818 --> 00:34:17,219
People train
runs out of Stubbville.
480
00:34:17,288 --> 00:34:18,755
That'll be fine.
481
00:34:18,823 --> 00:34:20,381
That'll be just fine.
482
00:34:22,460 --> 00:34:24,394
Leave it be.
483
00:34:24,462 --> 00:34:26,896
Get your lazy behind out here
484
00:34:26,964 --> 00:34:28,898
and put that in back.
485
00:34:28,966 --> 00:34:30,399
No. We've got it.
486
00:34:30,468 --> 00:34:31,799
It's very heavy.
487
00:34:31,869 --> 00:34:33,097
She don't mind.
488
00:34:33,171 --> 00:34:35,435
She's short and skinny,
489
00:34:35,506 --> 00:34:36,996
but she's strong.
490
00:34:37,075 --> 00:34:39,543
Her first baby...
491
00:34:39,610 --> 00:34:41,703
come out sideways.
492
00:34:41,779 --> 00:34:44,043
She didn't scream
or nothing.
493
00:34:44,115 --> 00:34:46,208
Isn't that something?
494
00:34:46,284 --> 00:34:47,979
You're a real trooper.
495
00:34:48,052 --> 00:34:50,646
We've got it already.
It's done.
496
00:34:54,325 --> 00:34:57,226
You know, Stubbville's
a little further than Wichita.
497
00:34:57,295 --> 00:34:58,922
How much further?
498
00:34:58,996 --> 00:35:00,190
30 miles.
499
00:35:01,566 --> 00:35:02,999
Maybe 40.
500
00:35:04,168 --> 00:35:06,659
No more
than 45 though,
501
00:35:06,737 --> 00:35:08,671
depending
on how he goes.
502
00:35:08,739 --> 00:35:11,537
It could be anywhere
up to 70 miles.
503
00:35:11,609 --> 00:35:13,270
Woof! Woof!
504
00:35:15,079 --> 00:35:17,013
Give me the glove.
505
00:35:17,081 --> 00:35:20,141
Ow! Just nipped.
Little part. Ooh!
506
00:35:20,251 --> 00:35:22,719
Give him the goddamn glove!
507
00:35:22,787 --> 00:35:24,414
Are we there yet?
508
00:35:24,489 --> 00:35:27,424
No, a little way to go yet.
509
00:35:28,893 --> 00:35:30,827
Beautiful country though,
isn't it?
510
00:35:30,895 --> 00:35:33,523
What do you figure
the temperature is?
511
00:35:33,598 --> 00:35:34,530
1.
512
00:36:00,591 --> 00:36:01,558
Thanks.
513
00:36:06,197 --> 00:36:08,165
They didn't have
two together.
514
00:36:08,232 --> 00:36:10,029
You got to
be kidding me.
515
00:36:10,101 --> 00:36:11,568
Oh, I knew it.
516
00:36:11,636 --> 00:36:14,901
The secretary was new,
and I explained it.
517
00:36:14,972 --> 00:36:16,735
Oh, ge... I'm sorry.
518
00:36:16,807 --> 00:36:18,331
They're just full.
519
00:36:18,409 --> 00:36:20,343
It's the holidays,
I guess.
520
00:36:20,411 --> 00:36:23,244
Hey, we're lucky
we got a ticket.
521
00:36:23,314 --> 00:36:26,545
Yeah. So, if I don't see you again.
522
00:36:26,617 --> 00:36:30,109
Want to meet for a drink
on the train?
523
00:36:30,188 --> 00:36:31,780
I'm going to sleep.
524
00:36:31,856 --> 00:36:33,346
You sure?
525
00:36:33,424 --> 00:36:36,154
Yeah. Anyway,
it's been interesting.
526
00:36:36,227 --> 00:36:39,458
That's the understatement
of the year.
527
00:36:39,530 --> 00:36:41,464
And thanks
for the ticket.
528
00:36:43,401 --> 00:36:45,335
Neal! I need your address.
529
00:36:45,403 --> 00:36:48,065
I got to pay you back
for this ticket.
530
00:36:48,139 --> 00:36:49,606
Ticket's a gift.
531
00:36:49,674 --> 00:36:52,666
No, no. Come on now.
What's the address?
532
00:36:52,743 --> 00:36:54,142
Del, it's a gift.
533
00:36:54,212 --> 00:36:56,271
Happy holidays.
534
00:36:57,582 --> 00:36:59,311
Same to you.
535
00:37:14,131 --> 00:37:15,120
Hi.
536
00:37:16,267 --> 00:37:17,700
Going home for Thanksgiving?
537
00:37:17,768 --> 00:37:18,826
Yeah.
538
00:37:18,903 --> 00:37:19,995
Me, too.
539
00:37:20,071 --> 00:37:22,130
We're just going to make it.
540
00:37:57,942 --> 00:37:59,842
What did you do here?
541
00:37:59,910 --> 00:38:02,105
Do you smell smoke?
542
00:38:27,505 --> 00:38:30,338
You walk a mile
to the highway.
543
00:38:30,408 --> 00:38:33,343
The trucks will take you
into Jefferson City.
544
00:39:21,292 --> 00:39:23,726
You're in a lousy mood, huh?
545
00:39:23,794 --> 00:39:25,819
To say the least.
546
00:39:27,798 --> 00:39:30,289
You ever travel
by bus before?
547
00:39:32,036 --> 00:39:33,367
Hmm.
548
00:39:33,437 --> 00:39:36,429
Your mood's probably
not going to improve much.
549
00:39:59,397 --> 00:40:01,763
Neal, Neal.
Check that out.
550
00:40:13,043 --> 00:40:15,739
Beats a movie on a plane, huh?
551
00:40:21,552 --> 00:40:24,020
Take a picture.
It'll last longer.
552
00:40:27,858 --> 00:40:29,485
You got busted.
553
00:40:32,663 --> 00:40:34,187
Oh, that was good.
554
00:40:37,868 --> 00:40:41,304
This is a good time
to tell you this.
555
00:40:41,372 --> 00:40:43,966
Our tickets are
only good to St. Louis.
556
00:40:44,041 --> 00:40:45,474
St. Louis to Chi-town
557
00:40:45,543 --> 00:40:48,740
is booked tighter
than Tom Thumb's ass.
558
00:40:56,554 --> 00:40:57,851
All right!
559
00:40:59,723 --> 00:41:01,816
That was fun,
wasn't it?
560
00:41:01,892 --> 00:41:04,759
All right.
Who wants to sing a tune?
561
00:41:04,829 --> 00:41:06,319
Who's got a song?
562
00:41:06,397 --> 00:41:07,830
I got one, uh...
563
00:41:07,898 --> 00:41:10,059
Neal Page has got one.
564
00:41:20,311 --> 00:41:21,471
No?
565
00:41:45,836 --> 00:41:47,235
Wilma!
566
00:41:47,471 --> 00:41:48,699
My name's Del Griffith.
567
00:41:48,772 --> 00:41:51,639
I'm with the American
Light and Fixture Company,
568
00:41:51,709 --> 00:41:53,142
jewelry division.
569
00:41:53,210 --> 00:41:55,178
I've got a great deal.
570
00:41:55,246 --> 00:41:58,238
This is your Diane Sawyer
autographed earring.
571
00:41:58,315 --> 00:42:00,681
Do you ever watch Sixty Minutes?
572
00:42:02,786 --> 00:42:03,718
Thanks.
573
00:42:03,787 --> 00:42:06,483
This is Czechoslovakian ivory.
574
00:42:06,557 --> 00:42:09,082
That's it. It's $5.00.
575
00:42:09,159 --> 00:42:10,217
Great.
576
00:42:10,294 --> 00:42:13,730
This is your
Walter Cronkite moon ring.
577
00:42:13,797 --> 00:42:15,094
Thank you.
578
00:42:15,165 --> 00:42:17,099
They are filled
with helium,
579
00:42:17,167 --> 00:42:18,532
so they're very light.
580
00:42:18,602 --> 00:42:20,194
Thank you.
581
00:42:20,271 --> 00:42:22,865
This is an autographed
Darryl Strawberry earring.
582
00:42:22,940 --> 00:42:24,703
All right!
583
00:42:24,775 --> 00:42:26,766
These are very
special earrings.
584
00:42:26,844 --> 00:42:28,402
These were originally
handcrafted
585
00:42:28,479 --> 00:42:30,913
for the Grand Wizard of China
586
00:42:30,981 --> 00:42:32,915
back in the fourth century.
587
00:42:32,983 --> 00:42:34,416
These aren't
the originals,
588
00:42:34,485 --> 00:42:37,545
but they are replicas.
Very good replicas, too.
589
00:42:37,621 --> 00:42:40,385
They're selling
for $5.00 a pair.
590
00:42:50,401 --> 00:42:52,835
I'm Marti Page,
and I'm thankful
591
00:42:52,903 --> 00:42:55,565
that my dad's coming home
for Thanksgiving.
592
00:43:02,413 --> 00:43:03,778
You know something?
593
00:43:03,847 --> 00:43:06,714
It makes you look
a little older, too.
594
00:43:06,784 --> 00:43:10,049
You could pass
for 18 or 19.
595
00:43:12,890 --> 00:43:14,824
Did you call the wife?
596
00:43:14,892 --> 00:43:16,951
No one was home.
597
00:43:17,027 --> 00:43:20,087
Probably at my daughter's
Thanksgiving pageant.
598
00:43:20,164 --> 00:43:22,257
Ohh.
599
00:43:22,333 --> 00:43:24,426
You missed it.
600
00:43:24,535 --> 00:43:26,969
I'm sorry. Those...
601
00:43:27,037 --> 00:43:29,471
those are the precious moments, too.
602
00:43:31,275 --> 00:43:33,505
They don't come back again.
603
00:43:33,577 --> 00:43:38,708
I've been spending too much time
away from home.
604
00:43:38,782 --> 00:43:41,216
I haven't been home
in years.
605
00:43:41,285 --> 00:43:43,378
What, seriously?
606
00:43:43,454 --> 00:43:45,319
It's a figure of speech.
607
00:43:45,389 --> 00:43:46,822
I'm away so much,
608
00:43:46,890 --> 00:43:48,824
it's like not being there.
609
00:43:48,892 --> 00:43:52,225
I called a friend of mine
at Eastern Airlines.
610
00:43:52,296 --> 00:43:53,695
It doesn't look good.
611
00:43:53,764 --> 00:43:56,597
I know.
I called all the airlines.
612
00:43:59,103 --> 00:44:02,470
Well, at least we're
sitting on over 100 beans
613
00:44:02,539 --> 00:44:04,200
from my brilliant idea.
614
00:44:04,274 --> 00:44:06,208
You're a terrific salesman.
615
00:44:06,276 --> 00:44:08,574
You know, uh...
616
00:44:08,646 --> 00:44:12,707
I've been thinking that when we put
our heads together,
617
00:44:12,783 --> 00:44:14,011
we really...
618
00:44:14,084 --> 00:44:15,915
we've really gotten nowhere.
619
00:44:15,986 --> 00:44:17,044
And, uh...
620
00:44:17,121 --> 00:44:20,056
you know,
I think I'm holding you up.
621
00:44:20,124 --> 00:44:22,058
Don't say that
about yourself.
622
00:44:22,126 --> 00:44:23,923
That's not true, Neal.
623
00:44:23,994 --> 00:44:27,987
I think we'll get
where we're going a lot faster
624
00:44:28,065 --> 00:44:30,499
if, uh...
we were alone.
625
00:44:30,567 --> 00:44:31,625
OK?
626
00:44:35,239 --> 00:44:36,297
OK.
627
00:44:36,373 --> 00:44:37,670
I see.
628
00:44:44,114 --> 00:44:47,208
I think I'll just
take care of this
629
00:44:47,284 --> 00:44:48,615
and get going.
630
00:44:48,686 --> 00:44:49,948
I appreciate that.
631
00:44:50,020 --> 00:44:52,784
It's just harder for two people
to travel.
632
00:44:52,856 --> 00:44:53,823
Yeah, sure.
633
00:44:53,891 --> 00:44:55,324
If you've got
reservations...
634
00:44:55,392 --> 00:44:56,518
I understand.
635
00:44:56,593 --> 00:44:57,992
Thanks for the meal.
636
00:44:58,062 --> 00:44:59,495
Yeah, that's all right.
637
00:44:59,563 --> 00:45:02,430
And I owe you
some of this, too.
638
00:45:02,499 --> 00:45:03,932
No, no, no, no.
639
00:45:04,001 --> 00:45:05,434
This is your cut.
640
00:45:05,502 --> 00:45:06,935
Take the money.
641
00:45:07,004 --> 00:45:09,438
Buy your kids
a chocolate turkey.
642
00:45:09,506 --> 00:45:12,031
I'm just going
to leave it there.
643
00:45:12,109 --> 00:45:13,633
Then leave it. Fine.
644
00:45:13,711 --> 00:45:15,406
I'm done, OK?
645
00:45:15,479 --> 00:45:18,573
I've got to go,
so if you'll excuse me,
646
00:45:18,649 --> 00:45:21,015
uh, I got things
to do, uh...
647
00:45:22,086 --> 00:45:23,280
so, uh...
648
00:45:23,353 --> 00:45:24,285
good luck,
649
00:45:24,354 --> 00:45:27,289
and I hope
you get home soon.
650
00:45:27,357 --> 00:45:28,722
I'll see you.
651
00:45:28,792 --> 00:45:30,123
Yeah, sure you will.
652
00:45:41,004 --> 00:45:43,234
It's a white
Lincoln town car,
653
00:45:43,307 --> 00:45:44,638
space v-5.
654
00:46:01,458 --> 00:46:03,085
V-5.
655
00:46:03,160 --> 00:46:04,718
V-5.
656
00:46:06,930 --> 00:46:08,659
V-5.
657
00:46:22,279 --> 00:46:23,371
Hey! Hey!
658
00:46:23,447 --> 00:46:25,142
Hey! Hey!
659
00:46:27,417 --> 00:46:30,011
Hey! Hey! Hey!
660
00:46:30,087 --> 00:46:31,520
The car's not there!
661
00:46:31,588 --> 00:46:34,557
I need a ride back!
662
00:46:41,298 --> 00:46:42,356
You...
663
00:46:43,467 --> 00:46:44,661
God!
664
00:46:45,669 --> 00:46:47,102
Goddamn it!
665
00:46:47,171 --> 00:46:48,604
Goddamn it!
666
00:47:23,207 --> 00:47:24,640
A- a-aah!
667
00:47:26,944 --> 00:47:27,933
Whoo!
668
00:47:59,610 --> 00:48:03,102
Oh, gee, Marie,
you're a stitch.
669
00:48:04,214 --> 00:48:05,647
No, mom's doing
the turkey.
670
00:48:05,716 --> 00:48:07,149
Yeah, dad wants ambrosia,
671
00:48:07,217 --> 00:48:10,152
so I guess we'll get
those miniature marshmallows.
672
00:48:10,220 --> 00:48:12,154
I'll do the crescent rolls,
673
00:48:12,222 --> 00:48:13,655
you do the cranberries.
674
00:48:13,724 --> 00:48:15,555
You know I can't cook.
675
00:48:18,328 --> 00:48:19,454
Ohh...
676
00:48:19,529 --> 00:48:21,190
Ahem.
677
00:48:21,265 --> 00:48:23,062
I'll see you
tomorrow then.
678
00:48:23,133 --> 00:48:24,361
Gobble gobble.
679
00:48:27,504 --> 00:48:28,766
Ohh... bye-bye.
680
00:48:35,212 --> 00:48:38,648
Welcome to Marathon.
May I help you?
681
00:48:38,715 --> 00:48:40,774
Yes.
682
00:48:40,851 --> 00:48:43,342
How may I help you?
683
00:48:43,420 --> 00:48:47,481
You can start by wiping
that fucking dumb-ass smile
684
00:48:47,557 --> 00:48:50,754
off your rosy
fucking cheeks.
685
00:48:50,827 --> 00:48:53,227
Then give me
a fucking automobile.
686
00:48:53,297 --> 00:48:54,730
A fucking Datsun,
687
00:48:54,798 --> 00:48:56,231
a fucking Toyota,
688
00:48:56,300 --> 00:48:57,528
a fucking Buick.
689
00:48:57,601 --> 00:48:59,933
Four fucking wheels
and a seat.
690
00:49:00,003 --> 00:49:03,029
I don't care for the way
you're speaking.
691
00:49:03,106 --> 00:49:05,267
I don't care for the way
692
00:49:05,342 --> 00:49:08,072
your company left me
in fucking nowhere
693
00:49:08,145 --> 00:49:11,444
with keys to a fucking car
that isn't fucking there.
694
00:49:11,515 --> 00:49:15,417
I didn't care to fucking walk
down a fucking highway
695
00:49:15,485 --> 00:49:17,214
and across a fucking runway
696
00:49:17,287 --> 00:49:20,256
to get back here
to have you smile
697
00:49:20,324 --> 00:49:21,621
at my fucking face.
698
00:49:21,692 --> 00:49:25,526
I want a fucking car
699
00:49:25,595 --> 00:49:28,826
right fucking now.
700
00:49:32,302 --> 00:49:34,702
May I see your
rental agreement?
701
00:49:34,771 --> 00:49:37,365
I threw it away.
702
00:49:37,441 --> 00:49:40,137
Oh, boy.
703
00:49:41,211 --> 00:49:43,042
Oh, boy, what?
704
00:49:43,113 --> 00:49:45,638
You're fucked.
705
00:50:05,869 --> 00:50:07,302
OK, 86, wake up.
706
00:50:07,371 --> 00:50:09,305
You're going
to block the line.
707
00:50:09,373 --> 00:50:10,806
Yeah, where you going?
708
00:50:10,874 --> 00:50:12,171
Chicago.
709
00:50:12,242 --> 00:50:13,174
Chicago?
710
00:50:13,243 --> 00:50:14,175
Chicago.
711
00:50:14,244 --> 00:50:16,474
You know you're
in St. Louis?
712
00:50:16,546 --> 00:50:18,878
Yes, I do.
713
00:50:19,950 --> 00:50:21,178
The airlines are faster,
714
00:50:21,251 --> 00:50:23,515
and you get
a free meal.
715
00:50:23,587 --> 00:50:24,952
If I wanted jokes,
716
00:50:25,022 --> 00:50:27,422
I'd watch you
take a leak.
717
00:50:29,226 --> 00:50:30,625
Don't just stand there
718
00:50:30,694 --> 00:50:33,390
like a slab of meat
with mittens.
719
00:50:46,943 --> 00:50:48,376
What are you doing?
720
00:50:48,445 --> 00:50:51,346
I almost crushed your head
like a melon.
721
00:50:52,416 --> 00:50:53,383
Del?
722
00:50:53,450 --> 00:50:54,917
Move your car!
723
00:50:54,985 --> 00:50:56,850
Just a minute, OK?
724
00:50:56,920 --> 00:50:58,581
Get outta here!
725
00:51:00,090 --> 00:51:01,523
What is your problem?
726
00:51:01,591 --> 00:51:04,116
You insensitive asshole.
727
00:51:04,194 --> 00:51:05,525
There's an injured man
728
00:51:05,595 --> 00:51:06,926
down on the street.
729
00:51:06,997 --> 00:51:08,897
Now, I'll move my car,
730
00:51:08,965 --> 00:51:10,865
but you help him up.
731
00:51:10,934 --> 00:51:12,196
No!
732
00:51:12,269 --> 00:51:13,293
My pleasure.
733
00:51:15,605 --> 00:51:17,368
Ohh...
734
00:51:28,418 --> 00:51:31,854
I had a feeling
that when we parted ways,
735
00:51:31,922 --> 00:51:32,854
somehow, someday,
736
00:51:32,923 --> 00:51:34,686
our paths
would cross again.
737
00:51:35,759 --> 00:51:37,090
Are you all right?
738
00:51:37,160 --> 00:51:39,651
I've never seen
anyone get lifted
739
00:51:39,729 --> 00:51:41,162
by his testicles before.
740
00:51:41,231 --> 00:51:42,664
Lucky thing for you
741
00:51:42,732 --> 00:51:44,962
that cop came when he did.
742
00:51:45,035 --> 00:51:47,265
Otherwise,
you'd be lifting your schnutz
743
00:51:47,337 --> 00:51:48,599
to tie your shoes.
744
00:51:48,672 --> 00:51:51,698
I'm sorry.
That's terrible.
745
00:51:51,775 --> 00:51:54,505
You know,
I'm glad I didn't kill you.
746
00:51:54,578 --> 00:51:57,376
I'd be glad if you had.
747
00:51:57,447 --> 00:51:59,574
Oh, you don't mean that.
748
00:51:59,649 --> 00:52:02,516
Remember what I said?
Go with the flow.
749
00:52:02,586 --> 00:52:05,521
How can I when
the rental car agency
750
00:52:05,589 --> 00:52:08,854
leaves me keys
to a car that isn't there,
751
00:52:08,925 --> 00:52:12,258
then I find out they
don't have any more cars?
752
00:52:12,329 --> 00:52:15,093
I got a car,
no sweat at all.
753
00:52:15,165 --> 00:52:17,565
Well, Del,
you're a charmed man.
754
00:52:17,667 --> 00:52:18,964
Nope.
755
00:52:19,035 --> 00:52:20,593
Oh, I know.
756
00:52:20,670 --> 00:52:23,104
You just go
with the flow.
757
00:52:23,173 --> 00:52:25,471
Like a twig
on the shoulders
758
00:52:25,542 --> 00:52:26,839
of a mighty stream.
759
00:53:00,677 --> 00:53:03,840
Would you please stop doing that
with the seat?
760
00:53:03,914 --> 00:53:05,711
Once you screw
with these,
761
00:53:05,782 --> 00:53:07,113
you never get comfortable.
762
00:53:07,184 --> 00:53:08,742
Quit screwing with it.
763
00:53:08,818 --> 00:53:10,046
I'm getting comfortable.
764
00:53:10,120 --> 00:53:12,315
Do you have a bad back?
765
00:53:12,389 --> 00:53:13,788
Well, I do,
766
00:53:13,857 --> 00:53:16,587
and there's only
a couple good positions.
767
00:53:16,660 --> 00:53:18,218
You're going to break it.
768
00:53:18,295 --> 00:53:19,592
Ahh.
769
00:53:19,663 --> 00:53:21,062
Done.
770
00:53:22,499 --> 00:53:23,625
Ah, lovely.
771
00:53:24,701 --> 00:53:25,998
Lovely, lovely.
772
00:53:32,742 --> 00:53:34,437
Oh, damn it.
773
00:53:34,511 --> 00:53:35,739
What now?
774
00:53:35,812 --> 00:53:37,746
I can't reach my feet
775
00:53:37,814 --> 00:53:39,748
to get my shoes off.
776
00:53:39,816 --> 00:53:42,250
That's fine.
Leave your shoes on.
777
00:53:42,319 --> 00:53:44,116
I can't relax
that way.
778
00:53:44,187 --> 00:53:47,850
I don't care to breathe
your foot odor.
779
00:53:47,924 --> 00:53:51,724
It must be swell being so perfect
and odor-free.
780
00:53:51,795 --> 00:53:53,729
Things about you
bother me,
781
00:53:53,797 --> 00:53:56,732
but I'm decent enough
not to bring them up.
782
00:53:56,800 --> 00:53:58,529
What about me
bothers you?
783
00:53:58,602 --> 00:53:59,830
There's lots of things.
784
00:53:59,903 --> 00:54:00,892
Name one.
785
00:54:00,971 --> 00:54:03,166
You want me to name one?
786
00:54:03,240 --> 00:54:04,400
Fine, um...
787
00:54:05,575 --> 00:54:08,339
you play with
your balls a lot.
788
00:54:12,382 --> 00:54:15,749
I do not play
with my balls.
789
00:54:15,819 --> 00:54:18,310
Larry Bird doesn't
handle the ball
790
00:54:18,388 --> 00:54:20,652
as much as you do.
791
00:54:20,724 --> 00:54:22,692
You trying
to start a fight?
792
00:54:22,759 --> 00:54:24,522
I'm simply
stating a fact.
793
00:54:24,594 --> 00:54:26,289
You fidget
with your nuts.
794
00:54:26,363 --> 00:54:27,625
Know what make me happy?
795
00:54:27,697 --> 00:54:29,927
Another couple of balls
and an extra set of fingers?
796
00:54:31,935 --> 00:54:33,368
Oh, that's humor.
797
00:54:33,436 --> 00:54:34,869
Oh, that's real humor.
798
00:54:34,938 --> 00:54:37,873
I'd be happy if you rested
your mouth.
799
00:54:37,941 --> 00:54:38,873
My pleasure.
800
00:54:38,942 --> 00:54:40,876
I'd like a little silence.
801
00:54:40,944 --> 00:54:41,876
No problem.
802
00:54:41,945 --> 00:54:42,912
Thank you.
803
00:54:42,979 --> 00:54:43,946
You're welcome.
804
00:54:50,120 --> 00:54:51,553
You broke the seat.
805
00:54:51,621 --> 00:54:54,988
You broke the goddamn seat.
I don't believe it.
806
00:54:55,058 --> 00:54:57,652
It wasn't broken
when I got out.
807
00:54:57,727 --> 00:54:59,058
You broke it.
808
00:54:59,129 --> 00:55:01,222
It's impossible
to break them.
809
00:55:01,298 --> 00:55:02,458
Impossible?
810
00:55:02,532 --> 00:55:03,999
You want to drive?
811
00:55:04,067 --> 00:55:06,501
No. Why did you do this?
812
00:55:08,605 --> 00:55:11,267
I won't be held responsible for
faulty engineering.
813
00:55:11,341 --> 00:55:14,902
This is comfortable.
This is really comfortable.
814
00:55:16,313 --> 00:55:19,180
I don't want to argue.
Let's not fight.
815
00:55:19,249 --> 00:55:20,682
All right, all right.
816
00:55:20,750 --> 00:55:23,685
Then I'm going to sleep.
All right.
817
00:55:23,753 --> 00:55:26,688
I'm putting my wallet
in the glove compartment.
818
00:55:26,756 --> 00:55:28,690
Don't let me
forget it.
819
00:55:28,758 --> 00:55:29,747
All right.
820
00:56:55,512 --> 00:56:57,946
That was Ray Charles
Doin' The Mess Around.
821
00:56:58,014 --> 00:57:00,039
Weather's beginning
to clear up.
822
00:57:00,116 --> 00:57:01,947
Hope you're
enjoying your evening.
823
00:57:02,018 --> 00:57:04,350
It's almost
half past the hour...
824
00:57:12,629 --> 00:57:13,789
Whew.
825
00:57:45,261 --> 00:57:46,853
Oh, come on.
826
00:57:52,368 --> 00:57:53,995
All right.
827
00:57:59,542 --> 00:58:00,474
Oh!
828
00:58:07,851 --> 00:58:08,875
Oh, shit!
829
00:58:15,558 --> 00:58:16,786
Uhh...
830
00:58:16,860 --> 00:58:17,918
Ohh...
831
00:58:17,994 --> 00:58:19,518
Ahh...
832
00:58:24,567 --> 00:58:26,262
There you go.
833
00:58:26,336 --> 00:58:27,963
OK.
834
00:58:28,037 --> 00:58:31,268
Think it out.
Just relax.
835
00:58:31,341 --> 00:58:33,866
Let go! Let go.
836
00:58:45,054 --> 00:58:53,655
Aah!
837
00:59:01,704 --> 00:59:03,365
What's happening?
838
00:59:03,439 --> 00:59:06,602
Oh, we almost hit a deer.
That's all.
839
00:59:06,676 --> 00:59:09,236
Are you all right?
840
00:59:09,312 --> 00:59:12,406
Yes, I'm fine.
Yes, I'm fine.
841
00:59:12,482 --> 00:59:15,474
It's hot in here.
Take your parka off.
842
00:59:15,552 --> 00:59:17,281
Yes. Yes, I will.
843
00:59:46,916 --> 00:59:49,783
Holy shit!
That guy's on the wrong side.
844
00:59:49,852 --> 00:59:52,286
He's going to
kill somebody!
845
00:59:52,355 --> 00:59:53,652
Oh, my God!
846
00:59:53,723 --> 00:59:55,486
Hey!
847
00:59:56,793 --> 00:59:57,782
Hey!
848
01:00:00,363 --> 01:00:02,797
Hey, what's going on?
849
01:00:02,865 --> 01:00:04,890
Some joker wants to race.
850
01:00:06,202 --> 01:00:07,260
Turn around!
851
01:00:07,337 --> 01:00:09,897
Don't race.
It's ridiculous.
852
01:00:09,973 --> 01:00:12,601
All right, come on.
Let's go. Let's go.
853
01:00:12,675 --> 01:00:14,370
Put your window down!
854
01:00:14,444 --> 01:00:15,968
He wants something.
855
01:00:16,045 --> 01:00:17,945
He's probably drunk.
856
01:00:18,014 --> 01:00:20,482
You're going
the wrong way!
857
01:00:20,550 --> 01:00:21,676
What?
858
01:00:21,751 --> 01:00:24,515
You're going
the wrong way!
859
01:00:26,089 --> 01:00:28,819
He says we're going
the wrong way.
860
01:00:28,891 --> 01:00:30,324
Oh, he's drunk.
861
01:00:30,393 --> 01:00:32,793
How would he know
where we're going?
862
01:00:32,862 --> 01:00:35,490
Yeah, how would he know?
863
01:00:35,565 --> 01:00:37,829
Thank you.
Thanks a lot.
864
01:00:37,900 --> 01:00:39,333
Terrific.
865
01:00:39,402 --> 01:00:40,334
Thank you.
866
01:00:41,738 --> 01:00:43,103
What a moron.
867
01:00:45,041 --> 01:00:47,669
You're going in
the wrong direction!
868
01:00:52,181 --> 01:00:55,309
You're going to kill somebody!
869
01:01:03,593 --> 01:01:05,754
You're going
the wrong way!
870
01:01:10,466 --> 01:01:11,865
Truck. Truck.
871
01:01:11,934 --> 01:01:12,901
What?
872
01:01:14,537 --> 01:01:21,101
Aah!
873
01:01:21,177 --> 01:01:22,769
Ah ha ha ha ha!
874
01:01:22,845 --> 01:01:25,643
Ah ha ha ha ha!
875
01:02:15,531 --> 01:02:17,624
Well, this isn't so bad.
876
01:02:17,700 --> 01:02:21,136
I thought it would be
a lot worse than this.
877
01:02:21,204 --> 01:02:24,435
They'll be able
to buff this out.
878
01:02:24,507 --> 01:02:25,974
Oh, yeah.
879
01:02:29,378 --> 01:02:30,640
Wow!
880
01:02:32,048 --> 01:02:35,108
I mean,
that was close.
881
01:02:35,184 --> 01:02:38,813
We can laugh about it now.
We're all right.
882
01:02:38,888 --> 01:02:41,482
The whole, uh...
883
01:02:41,557 --> 01:02:45,687
Maybe we should just get my stuff
off the road, huh?
884
01:02:45,762 --> 01:02:47,753
What do you think? Yeah.
885
01:02:47,830 --> 01:02:49,764
Yeah, that's a good idea.
886
01:02:51,667 --> 01:02:53,567
Oh, my back!
887
01:02:53,636 --> 01:02:55,126
Ohh!
888
01:02:56,005 --> 01:02:57,063
God.
889
01:02:59,008 --> 01:03:00,373
Ohh!
890
01:03:00,443 --> 01:03:01,671
Ohh!
891
01:03:17,527 --> 01:03:19,620
Come on.
Here we go.
892
01:03:19,695 --> 01:03:21,458
Thanks.
893
01:03:21,531 --> 01:03:24,466
Oh. Set it down
for a second.
894
01:03:30,540 --> 01:03:33,600
Whew. What a night.
895
01:04:26,696 --> 01:04:27,663
What?
896
01:04:28,865 --> 01:04:30,127
What?
897
01:04:30,199 --> 01:04:33,635
You finally did it
to yourself.
898
01:04:33,703 --> 01:04:34,795
Huh?
899
01:04:38,374 --> 01:04:41,309
I mean, good luck
turning the car in.
900
01:04:41,377 --> 01:04:44,813
They'll be happy as pigs in shit
to see you.
901
01:04:54,857 --> 01:04:57,655
How could you
rent the thing anyway
902
01:04:57,727 --> 01:04:59,160
without a credit card?
903
01:04:59,228 --> 01:05:01,822
You couldn't.
How could you do it?
904
01:05:01,898 --> 01:05:04,833
I gave this gal
behind the counter
905
01:05:04,901 --> 01:05:07,335
a set of
shower curtain rings.
906
01:05:14,644 --> 01:05:16,509
You can't rent a car
907
01:05:16,579 --> 01:05:18,069
with shower curtain rings.
908
01:05:28,090 --> 01:05:30,024
Well, uh...
909
01:05:30,092 --> 01:05:32,526
somehow your, uh...
910
01:05:32,595 --> 01:05:36,031
diner's club card
wound up in my wallet,
911
01:05:36,098 --> 01:05:38,532
and I, uh, just...
912
01:05:38,601 --> 01:05:40,193
You stole it!
913
01:05:40,269 --> 01:05:41,201
Not exactly.
914
01:05:41,270 --> 01:05:42,703
You stole my card!
915
01:05:42,772 --> 01:05:44,034
I didn't.
916
01:05:44,106 --> 01:05:47,473
You stole my card, rented a car,
then burned it up!
917
01:05:47,610 --> 01:05:49,976
I found it
in my wallet!
918
01:05:50,046 --> 01:05:52,310
I thought you
put it there.
919
01:05:52,381 --> 01:05:53,939
Why would I do that?
920
01:05:54,016 --> 01:05:55,347
Kindness?
921
01:05:55,418 --> 01:05:57,750
Kindness?
922
01:05:57,820 --> 01:05:59,151
Kindness?
923
01:05:59,221 --> 01:06:00,654
You stole it!
924
01:06:00,723 --> 01:06:02,156
He stole it!
925
01:06:02,224 --> 01:06:06,024
No, I didn't.
I was going to send it back to you
926
01:06:06,095 --> 01:06:09,087
with whatever the rental car
charge was, plus interest.
927
01:06:09,165 --> 01:06:11,565
You didn't give me your address.
What could I do?
928
01:06:11,634 --> 01:06:12,999
You just ditched me.
929
01:06:13,069 --> 01:06:15,503
I had no money,
no cards, nothing.
930
01:06:15,571 --> 01:06:16,731
Give it back!
931
01:06:16,806 --> 01:06:17,738
I can't!
932
01:06:19,875 --> 01:06:20,807
Why not?
933
01:06:20,876 --> 01:06:21,843
Because!
934
01:06:23,245 --> 01:06:24,337
Because why?
935
01:06:24,413 --> 01:06:26,847
When we stopped
to gas up,
936
01:06:26,916 --> 01:06:29,851
I put the card back
in your wallet.
937
01:06:39,562 --> 01:06:40,893
Ohh.
938
01:06:41,931 --> 01:06:43,831
Are you mad at me?
939
01:06:44,900 --> 01:06:46,629
Ohh!
940
01:06:46,702 --> 01:06:48,863
Ohh!
941
01:06:59,815 --> 01:07:02,147
You know,
you could've killed me,
942
01:07:02,218 --> 01:07:05,187
slugging me in the gut
when I wasn't ready.
943
01:07:05,254 --> 01:07:07,188
That's how Houdini died.
944
01:07:12,561 --> 01:07:13,960
Ow. Ah!
945
01:07:16,732 --> 01:07:18,666
One good thing about it...
946
01:07:18,734 --> 01:07:22,170
with all this fresh air,
we'll sleep like babies.
947
01:07:22,238 --> 01:07:24,672
Neal? Hey, hey, Neal,
Wait up.
948
01:07:27,009 --> 01:07:28,499
I need one room.
949
01:07:28,577 --> 01:07:31,512
If you're pissed at me,
we can get separate rooms.
950
01:07:31,580 --> 01:07:33,013
Get your own room.
951
01:07:33,082 --> 01:07:35,516
I'll need
a major credit card.
952
01:07:35,584 --> 01:07:37,848
All right.
All right.
953
01:07:40,389 --> 01:07:42,050
I have, uh...
954
01:07:43,059 --> 01:07:44,617
Diner's...
955
01:07:46,228 --> 01:07:47,160
Visa...
956
01:07:49,098 --> 01:07:50,690
and a gasoline card.
957
01:07:52,101 --> 01:07:53,193
Uh...
958
01:07:54,303 --> 01:07:57,101
these aren't, uh,
credit cards.
959
01:07:57,173 --> 01:08:00,233
All right,
I'll pay cash. Cash.
960
01:08:00,309 --> 01:08:01,901
$42.50.
961
01:08:09,618 --> 01:08:12,746
How about... $ 17?
962
01:08:14,090 --> 01:08:15,819
I can't do that.
963
01:08:15,891 --> 01:08:16,949
Please.
964
01:08:17,026 --> 01:08:18,994
Have mercy.
965
01:08:19,061 --> 01:08:21,825
I've been wearing
the same underwear
966
01:08:21,897 --> 01:08:23,694
since Tuesday.
967
01:08:23,766 --> 01:08:25,597
I can vouch for that.
968
01:08:28,237 --> 01:08:31,172
I don't... I don't...
I don't own the place.
969
01:08:37,746 --> 01:08:41,512
$ 17 and a hell of a nice watch.
970
01:08:50,126 --> 01:08:51,058
Ouch.
971
01:08:56,966 --> 01:08:59,025
Um, would you
like a room?
972
01:09:05,608 --> 01:09:07,974
I got a slight problem here.
973
01:09:08,043 --> 01:09:10,307
I don't have the $42.50.
974
01:09:10,379 --> 01:09:13,815
You have $ 17
and a good watch?
975
01:09:13,883 --> 01:09:16,852
No, I don't.
I have, uh...
976
01:09:20,055 --> 01:09:22,819
I have $2.00
and, uh...
977
01:09:25,394 --> 01:09:26,986
and a Casio.
978
01:09:30,166 --> 01:09:31,258
Mmm.
979
01:09:31,333 --> 01:09:34,359
I'm going to have to say
good night, so...
980
01:10:22,218 --> 01:10:23,480
Well, Marie,
981
01:10:23,552 --> 01:10:27,488
once again, my dear,
you were as right as rain.
982
01:10:28,891 --> 01:10:30,825
I am, without a doubt,
983
01:10:30,893 --> 01:10:33,327
the biggest pain in the butt
984
01:10:33,395 --> 01:10:35,829
that ever came down the pike.
985
01:10:37,066 --> 01:10:40,331
I meet someone whose
company I really enjoy,
986
01:10:40,402 --> 01:10:42,336
and what do I do?
987
01:10:43,572 --> 01:10:45,005
I go overboard.
988
01:10:45,074 --> 01:10:47,008
I smother the poor soul.
989
01:10:47,076 --> 01:10:48,941
I cause him more trouble
990
01:10:49,011 --> 01:10:51,445
than he has a right to.
991
01:10:52,881 --> 01:10:55,475
God, I got a big mouth.
992
01:10:57,686 --> 01:10:59,711
Ohh.
993
01:11:01,023 --> 01:11:03,958
When am I ever
going to wake up?
994
01:11:23,512 --> 01:11:26,970
I wish you were here
with me right now.
995
01:11:30,552 --> 01:11:32,611
But I guess...
996
01:11:32,688 --> 01:11:34,553
that's not
going to happen.
997
01:11:36,392 --> 01:11:38,053
Not now, anyway.
998
01:11:39,895 --> 01:11:41,328
What did I do
999
01:11:41,397 --> 01:11:44,332
to get hooked up
with this guy?
1000
01:12:02,351 --> 01:12:05,286
You're going to
freeze to death out there.
1001
01:12:12,127 --> 01:12:13,458
How's your drink?
1002
01:12:13,529 --> 01:12:14,621
Good.
1003
01:12:16,532 --> 01:12:17,965
Go for another one?
1004
01:12:18,033 --> 01:12:19,466
Where you been?
1005
01:12:19,535 --> 01:12:20,968
You been to Italy?
1006
01:12:21,036 --> 01:12:22,469
You had amaretto?
1007
01:12:22,538 --> 01:12:25,473
I have amaretto,
and this is a gin.
1008
01:12:25,541 --> 01:12:27,475
Is there a tequila there?
1009
01:12:27,543 --> 01:12:29,477
Ahem. A little Mexican trip.
1010
01:12:29,545 --> 01:12:30,477
Tequila?
1011
01:12:30,546 --> 01:12:32,343
Here you go.
Coming up.
1012
01:12:32,414 --> 01:12:34,882
Is this a good combo or what?
1013
01:12:35,050 --> 01:12:37,075
No, probably not.
1014
01:12:37,152 --> 01:12:42,317
Me, I'm going
back to, uh, Jamaica.
1015
01:12:42,391 --> 01:12:43,585
Jamaica, man.
1016
01:12:43,659 --> 01:12:46,594
Go to Jamaica.
Have some rum, man.
1017
01:12:46,662 --> 01:12:47,788
Dig it.
1018
01:12:47,863 --> 01:12:50,024
Iree, iree, man.
1019
01:12:52,601 --> 01:12:54,535
Oh, shit.
1020
01:12:57,106 --> 01:13:00,041
You know,
when I'm dead and buried,
1021
01:13:00,109 --> 01:13:03,044
all I'll have
to prove I was here
1022
01:13:03,112 --> 01:13:05,046
was some shower curtain rings
1023
01:13:05,114 --> 01:13:06,547
that didn't fall down.
1024
01:13:06,615 --> 01:13:08,173
Great legacy, huh?
1025
01:13:08,250 --> 01:13:10,047
At the very least,
1026
01:13:10,119 --> 01:13:12,053
at the absolute minimum,
1027
01:13:12,121 --> 01:13:14,681
you've got a woman
you love
1028
01:13:14,757 --> 01:13:17,282
to grow old with, right?
1029
01:13:17,359 --> 01:13:20,021
You love her, don't you?
1030
01:13:25,134 --> 01:13:28,069
Love is not a big enough word.
1031
01:13:28,137 --> 01:13:30,571
It's not a big enough word
1032
01:13:30,639 --> 01:13:33,699
for how I feel
about my wife.
1033
01:13:33,776 --> 01:13:35,266
To the wives.
1034
01:13:35,344 --> 01:13:36,606
To the wives.
1035
01:13:43,152 --> 01:13:44,779
Wow.
1036
01:13:46,155 --> 01:13:49,522
Well, let me just
close this conversation
1037
01:13:49,591 --> 01:13:52,526
by saying you are
one unique individual.
1038
01:13:54,596 --> 01:13:56,029
What is unique?
1039
01:13:56,098 --> 01:13:58,532
Uh... latin for asshole?
1040
01:13:58,600 --> 01:14:01,535
Grab those.
I'm going to kick them off.
1041
01:14:03,972 --> 01:14:08,033
As much trouble as I've had
on this little journey,
1042
01:14:08,110 --> 01:14:11,546
I'm sure one day
I'll look back and laugh.
1043
01:14:11,613 --> 01:14:13,012
You think so?
1044
01:14:13,081 --> 01:14:15,549
Oh, I'm laughing already.
1045
01:14:15,617 --> 01:14:16,549
Oh, God.
1046
01:14:16,618 --> 01:14:19,178
Oh, when that car blew up.
1047
01:14:19,254 --> 01:14:21,552
Was that seat hot or what?
1048
01:14:21,623 --> 01:14:24,786
I feel like a big whopper.
1049
01:14:24,860 --> 01:14:27,556
Turn me over.
I'm done on this side.
1050
01:14:27,629 --> 01:14:30,564
I'm afraid
to look at my ass.
1051
01:14:30,632 --> 01:14:34,568
I'm going to have
those griddle marks on my ass.
1052
01:14:37,806 --> 01:14:40,070
Ha ha ha.
Potato chips.
1053
01:14:42,144 --> 01:14:43,577
They're everywhere!
1054
01:14:43,645 --> 01:14:45,579
Aah!
1055
01:14:45,647 --> 01:14:47,205
Ha ha ha!
1056
01:14:47,282 --> 01:14:49,250
This feels
like summer camp.
1057
01:14:49,318 --> 01:14:53,345
Ha ha ha! Aah!
1058
01:15:05,167 --> 01:15:08,102
Now how the hell
does this turn off?
1059
01:15:08,170 --> 01:15:09,102
Ow!
1060
01:15:11,673 --> 01:15:13,231
Aah!
1061
01:15:13,375 --> 01:15:14,603
You all set?
1062
01:15:14,676 --> 01:15:16,109
Just a minute.
1063
01:15:16,178 --> 01:15:18,112
Give it a good push.
1064
01:15:18,180 --> 01:15:19,112
All right.
1065
01:15:19,181 --> 01:15:20,113
All right.
1066
01:15:20,182 --> 01:15:21,615
Oh, geez.
1067
01:15:24,686 --> 01:15:27,120
Push! Put some oomph into it!
1068
01:15:27,189 --> 01:15:28,656
I am! I am!
1069
01:15:28,724 --> 01:15:30,248
Push, for Christ sake!
1070
01:15:31,493 --> 01:15:33,120
We have to rock it.
1071
01:15:33,195 --> 01:15:34,753
All right. OK.
1072
01:15:34,830 --> 01:15:37,697
Up and down.
Here we go. Ready?
1073
01:15:37,766 --> 01:15:38,755
Yeah.
1074
01:15:38,834 --> 01:15:40,131
Here we go.
1075
01:15:40,202 --> 01:15:41,328
Reverse!
1076
01:15:49,511 --> 01:15:50,443
Aww!
1077
01:15:51,280 --> 01:15:52,474
Huh.
1078
01:15:57,786 --> 01:15:58,878
Get in!
1079
01:16:03,792 --> 01:16:04,952
Go!
1080
01:16:59,982 --> 01:17:01,210
Oh.
1081
01:17:03,785 --> 01:17:06,219
Oh, great.
Great. A cop.
1082
01:17:06,288 --> 01:17:07,220
Watch it!
1083
01:17:07,289 --> 01:17:09,223
How fast
are you going?
1084
01:17:09,291 --> 01:17:11,725
I can't tell.
The speedometer's melted.
1085
01:17:11,793 --> 01:17:13,317
Pull over.
1086
01:17:13,395 --> 01:17:15,226
Top of the morning,
officer.
1087
01:17:15,297 --> 01:17:16,229
Hi.
1088
01:17:16,298 --> 01:17:19,233
Is there something
I can help you with?
1089
01:17:19,301 --> 01:17:21,235
What the hell you driving?
1090
01:17:21,303 --> 01:17:24,534
We had a small fire
last night.
1091
01:17:24,606 --> 01:17:28,235
You have any idea how fast
you were going?
1092
01:17:28,310 --> 01:17:29,743
Our speedometer's melted.
1093
01:17:29,811 --> 01:17:33,247
It's hard to say
with any degree of accuracy
1094
01:17:33,315 --> 01:17:36,079
how fast we were going.
1095
01:17:36,151 --> 01:17:38,210
78 miles an hour.
1096
01:17:39,388 --> 01:17:40,821
78, huh?
1097
01:17:40,889 --> 01:17:43,824
Well, yeah.
I can buy that. Sure.
1098
01:17:43,892 --> 01:17:45,826
You'd know better than us,
1099
01:17:45,894 --> 01:17:47,759
especially since
our speedometer's melted.
1100
01:17:47,829 --> 01:17:51,265
You feel this vehicle is safe
for highway travel?
1101
01:17:51,333 --> 01:17:52,766
Yes, I do.
1102
01:17:52,834 --> 01:17:54,267
It's not pretty,
1103
01:17:54,336 --> 01:17:57,897
but it will get you
where you want to go.
1104
01:17:57,973 --> 01:17:59,770
You got no outside mirror.
1105
01:17:59,841 --> 01:18:00,899
It's lost.
1106
01:18:00,976 --> 01:18:02,773
You have no
functioning gauges.
1107
01:18:02,844 --> 01:18:04,539
No, not a one.
1108
01:18:04,613 --> 01:18:06,774
However, the radio still works.
1109
01:18:06,848 --> 01:18:08,782
Funny as that may seem,
1110
01:18:08,850 --> 01:18:12,286
the radio's the only thing
that's really working good.
1111
01:18:12,354 --> 01:18:13,787
Don't ask me how.
1112
01:18:15,891 --> 01:18:18,052
I can't let you go.
1113
01:18:18,126 --> 01:18:19,286
Can't what?
1114
01:18:19,361 --> 01:18:21,795
It's not fit
for the road.
1115
01:18:21,863 --> 01:18:23,797
The vehicle
will be impounded
1116
01:18:23,865 --> 01:18:26,299
until it's made
safe for travel.
1117
01:18:26,368 --> 01:18:29,303
OK, officer, I admit
I broke the law,
1118
01:18:29,371 --> 01:18:31,805
and for that
I'm really sorry.
1119
01:18:31,873 --> 01:18:33,306
You got me there,
1120
01:18:33,375 --> 01:18:36,310
and I won't argue
one iota, I swear.
1121
01:18:36,378 --> 01:18:37,345
However, um...
1122
01:18:37,412 --> 01:18:39,312
if you impound our car,
1123
01:18:39,381 --> 01:18:42,316
I'll be unable
to get my friend home
1124
01:18:42,384 --> 01:18:43,851
for his Thanksgiving dinner.
1125
01:19:14,349 --> 01:19:16,943
Well, our ship has come in.
1126
01:19:22,591 --> 01:19:25,116
It's free and it's nonstop.
1127
01:19:25,193 --> 01:19:27,787
I said I'd get you home.
1128
01:19:27,863 --> 01:19:29,831
Just so the heater's working.
1129
01:19:29,898 --> 01:19:31,798
The driver's a little freaky
1130
01:19:31,867 --> 01:19:34,563
about people riding
in his cab.
1131
01:19:34,636 --> 01:19:36,297
We can't sit there.
1132
01:19:36,371 --> 01:19:39,238
Then where are we
supposed to ride?
1133
01:19:41,376 --> 01:19:42,809
Beats walking, huh?
1134
01:19:44,379 --> 01:19:47,314
You know,
you're going to be in Chicago
1135
01:19:47,382 --> 01:19:50,249
in less than three hours,
around there,
1136
01:19:50,318 --> 01:19:52,252
if we don't hit traffic,
1137
01:19:52,320 --> 01:19:55,756
and I don't think we should
since it's Thanksgiving.
1138
01:19:56,825 --> 01:19:58,224
We're moving now.
1139
01:20:30,659 --> 01:20:32,286
You believe this?
1140
01:20:32,360 --> 01:20:35,295
It's been a hell of a trip.
1141
01:20:35,363 --> 01:20:36,295
Sure has.
1142
01:20:36,364 --> 01:20:39,299
But, uh, after all
is said and done,
1143
01:20:39,367 --> 01:20:41,301
you did get me home.
1144
01:20:41,369 --> 01:20:44,600
Next time, let's go first class,
all right?
1145
01:20:44,673 --> 01:20:47,608
God, I hope there
isn't a next time.
1146
01:20:47,676 --> 01:20:48,608
I know.
1147
01:20:51,813 --> 01:20:53,246
This you?
1148
01:20:55,317 --> 01:20:56,249
Yeah.
1149
01:21:00,555 --> 01:21:02,489
It's been great meeting you.
1150
01:21:02,557 --> 01:21:05,492
I'm sorry if I caused
you any trouble.
1151
01:21:05,560 --> 01:21:06,959
You got me home,
1152
01:21:07,028 --> 01:21:09,053
and, uh...
a little late.
1153
01:21:09,130 --> 01:21:10,757
A couple days.
1154
01:21:10,832 --> 01:21:12,265
But, uh...
1155
01:21:12,334 --> 01:21:14,427
I'm a little wiser, too.
1156
01:21:14,502 --> 01:21:16,231
Me, too.
1157
01:21:17,339 --> 01:21:18,772
Happy holidays.
1158
01:21:18,840 --> 01:21:20,102
Same to you.
1159
01:21:22,210 --> 01:21:23,768
Happy Thanksgiving, Neal.
1160
01:21:23,845 --> 01:21:26,279
Give my love to the family.
1161
01:21:26,348 --> 01:21:28,407
Maybe I'll meet them someday.
1162
01:21:28,483 --> 01:21:30,781
Say hello to Marie for me.
1163
01:21:30,852 --> 01:21:32,149
Yeah.
1164
01:21:33,355 --> 01:21:35,289
So... OK.
1165
01:21:35,357 --> 01:21:37,655
And you have
a happy Thanksgiving.
1166
01:21:37,726 --> 01:21:39,785
Hey, you know it.
1167
01:21:39,861 --> 01:21:41,522
So long.
1168
01:23:05,146 --> 01:23:07,740
I like...
I like me.
1169
01:23:07,816 --> 01:23:09,340
My wife likes me.
1170
01:23:12,153 --> 01:23:15,247
At the very least,
the absolute minimum,
1171
01:23:15,323 --> 01:23:17,757
you've got
a woman you love
1172
01:23:17,826 --> 01:23:19,760
to grow old with, right?
1173
01:23:24,933 --> 01:23:27,424
I'm spending
too much time away.
1174
01:23:27,502 --> 01:23:29,766
I haven't been home
in years.
1175
01:23:29,838 --> 01:23:32,272
I haven't been home
in years.
1176
01:23:32,340 --> 01:23:34,774
I haven't been home
in years.
1177
01:23:56,998 --> 01:23:59,728
Del, what are you
doing here?
1178
01:24:05,807 --> 01:24:08,241
You said you were going home.
1179
01:24:08,309 --> 01:24:10,300
What are you doing here?
1180
01:24:11,813 --> 01:24:13,246
I, uh...
1181
01:24:16,317 --> 01:24:18,182
I don't have a home.
1182
01:24:24,826 --> 01:24:27,260
Marie's been dead
for eight years.
1183
01:25:03,364 --> 01:25:06,800
Boy, you are
one lucky guy, Neal.
1184
01:25:06,868 --> 01:25:09,063
I know.
1185
01:25:09,137 --> 01:25:10,798
I won't stay long.
1186
01:25:10,872 --> 01:25:12,806
Maybe I'll just say hi,
1187
01:25:12,874 --> 01:25:14,808
then be on my way.
1188
01:25:14,876 --> 01:25:16,275
Just come on.
1189
01:25:34,395 --> 01:25:35,760
Hiya, kiddo.
1190
01:25:35,830 --> 01:25:37,297
Daddy!
1191
01:25:37,365 --> 01:25:39,333
Hey!
Hey!
1192
01:25:39,400 --> 01:25:40,765
Neal's home!
1193
01:25:40,835 --> 01:25:43,497
Del Griffith,
meet my father-in-law Walt,
1194
01:25:43,571 --> 01:25:45,334
my mother-in-law Peg,
1195
01:25:45,406 --> 01:25:48,273
my mother Joy,
and my dad Martin.
1196
01:25:48,343 --> 01:25:49,275
Welcome, Del.
1197
01:25:49,344 --> 01:25:51,278
This little guy's
Neal Jr.,
1198
01:25:51,346 --> 01:25:52,779
my little gem Marti,
1199
01:25:52,847 --> 01:25:56,544
and somewhere around here
is my baby boy Seth.
1200
01:26:08,863 --> 01:26:13,027
Honey, I'd like you to meet
a friend of mine.
1201
01:26:17,872 --> 01:26:20,204
Hello, Mr. Griffith.
1202
01:26:21,376 --> 01:26:23,367
Hello, Mrs. Page.
1203
01:28:06,814 --> 01:28:08,338
You're messing
with the wrong guy!
1204
01:28:14,956 --> 01:28:16,548
I can take anything.
1205
01:28:21,162 --> 01:28:22,094
Who's that?
1206
01:28:23,665 --> 01:28:25,098
You're no saint.
1207
01:28:25,166 --> 01:28:26,724
I never did
introduce myself.
1208
01:28:26,801 --> 01:28:27,733
Del Griffith.
1209
01:28:28,703 --> 01:28:29,727
Del Griffith.
1210
01:28:29,804 --> 01:28:30,736
Del Griffith.
1211
01:28:31,806 --> 01:28:32,738
Del Griffith.
1212
01:28:32,807 --> 01:28:34,172
I can take anything.
1213
01:28:35,743 --> 01:28:39,804
Wow! Ha ha ha!
1214
01:28:39,881 --> 01:28:42,679
Ha ha ha!
1215
01:28:42,750 --> 01:28:44,308
I mean, that was close.
1216
01:28:46,287 --> 01:28:47,879
You're messing
with the wrong guy!
1217
01:28:47,955 --> 01:28:49,286
We can laugh
about it now.
1218
01:28:49,357 --> 01:28:52,884
We're all right.
Ha ha ha!
1219
01:28:54,362 --> 01:28:57,126
Del Griffith. Del Griffith.
D- D-D-Del...
1220
01:29:00,702 --> 01:29:01,634
Who's that?
1221
01:29:02,837 --> 01:29:03,861
You're no saint.
1222
01:29:08,276 --> 01:29:09,208
Del Griffith.
1223
01:29:09,277 --> 01:29:10,209
Who's that?
1224
01:29:12,413 --> 01:29:13,937
I can take anything.
1225
01:29:26,494 --> 01:29:27,791
We can laugh about it.
1226
01:29:30,798 --> 01:29:32,288
How can you stand it?
1227
01:29:35,269 --> 01:29:36,395
How can you stand it?
1228
01:29:37,972 --> 01:29:38,904
Del Griffith.
1229
01:29:43,911 --> 01:29:44,878
Who's that?
1230
01:29:50,518 --> 01:29:51,450
Wow!
1231
01:29:57,925 --> 01:29:59,290
How can you stand it?
1232
01:30:00,828 --> 01:30:01,886
Del Griffith.
1233
01:30:01,963 --> 01:30:03,260
How can you stand it?
1234
01:30:03,331 --> 01:30:05,595
Ha ha ha!
1235
01:30:05,666 --> 01:30:07,361
I mean, that was close.
1236
01:30:09,237 --> 01:30:10,795
You're messing
with the wrong guy!
1237
01:30:10,872 --> 01:30:12,237
We can laugh
about it now.
1238
01:30:12,306 --> 01:30:15,366
We're all right.
Ha ha ha!
1239
01:30:17,412 --> 01:30:20,108
Del Griffith. Del Griffith.
D- D-D-Del...
1240
01:30:23,618 --> 01:30:24,550
Who's that?
1241
01:30:26,020 --> 01:30:26,952
No saint.
1242
01:30:30,858 --> 01:30:31,790
Del Griffith.
1243
01:30:31,859 --> 01:30:32,791
Who's that?
1244
01:30:35,563 --> 01:30:37,053
I can take anything.
1245
01:32:08,823 --> 01:32:10,256
Here's two.
1246
01:32:20,835 --> 01:32:22,268
You're three.
1247
01:32:32,269 --> 01:32:36,269
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