1 00:00:01,823 --> 00:00:05,259 Theorizing that one could time travel within his own lifetime, 2 00:00:05,327 --> 00:00:09,058 Dr. Sam Beckett led an elite group of scientists into the desert... 3 00:00:09,131 --> 00:00:13,227 to develop a top secret project known as Quantum Leap. 4 00:00:13,301 --> 00:00:15,895 Pressured to prove his theories or lose funding, 5 00:00:15,971 --> 00:00:19,634 Dr. Beckett prematurely stepped into the project accelerator... 6 00:00:19,708 --> 00:00:21,699 and vanished. 7 00:00:27,782 --> 00:00:30,478 He awoke to find himself in the past, 8 00:00:30,552 --> 00:00:35,683 suffering from partial amnesia and facing a mirror image that was not his own. 9 00:00:35,757 --> 00:00:37,918 Fortunately, contact with his own time... 10 00:00:37,993 --> 00:00:42,259 was maintained through brain wave transmissions with Al, the project observer, 11 00:00:42,330 --> 00:00:47,063 who appears in the form of a hologram that only Dr. Beckett can see and hear. 12 00:00:47,135 --> 00:00:50,502 Trapped in the past, Dr. Beckett finds himself leaping from life to life, 13 00:00:50,572 --> 00:00:53,541 putting things right that once went wrong... 14 00:00:53,608 --> 00:00:57,669 and hoping each time that his next leap will be the leap home. 15 00:01:05,020 --> 00:01:07,011 It is too! 16 00:01:07,088 --> 00:01:09,147 It is not. That is my Queen T-shirt. 17 00:01:09,224 --> 00:01:11,317 It's not yours, jerk. 18 00:01:11,393 --> 00:01:16,228 Read my lips, barf-head. That's my shirt, and I want it back. 19 00:01:16,298 --> 00:01:18,664 It's Peggy Couche's. Now, would you leave me alone! 20 00:01:18,733 --> 00:01:20,701 Give me that. 21 00:01:20,769 --> 00:01:25,536 - I went to that Queen concert, and I paid for it with my own money! - Look what Wookiee did. He ate my doll. 22 00:01:25,607 --> 00:01:27,768 Get your grubby hands off, and keep outta my room! 23 00:01:27,842 --> 00:01:30,072 It's not your T-shirt. It is too. 24 00:01:30,145 --> 00:01:31,874 It is not. Liar. 25 00:01:31,947 --> 00:01:33,881 Booger-face. 26 00:01:33,949 --> 00:01:36,417 Give it back, moron! Come and get it, shrimp! 27 00:01:36,484 --> 00:01:38,452 Mommy! Mom! 28 00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:42,286 Mom, please fix my doll. 29 00:01:44,459 --> 00:01:46,757 My poor dolly's all chewed up. 30 00:01:46,828 --> 00:01:48,762 I'm a mommy. Give me... 31 00:03:09,777 --> 00:03:12,143 - Give it to me! - No! Give it to me! 32 00:03:12,213 --> 00:03:14,613 Listen. It's my shirt. You took it out of my room. 33 00:03:14,682 --> 00:03:17,549 It's Peggy's shirt! You took this out of my room, and you know it. 34 00:03:17,618 --> 00:03:20,451 Look what you did. Great. That is Peggy's shirt. 35 00:03:20,521 --> 00:03:24,184 It's my shirt, Susan! It's Peggy's shirt. 36 00:03:24,258 --> 00:03:26,522 I went to this concert. I remember the concert. 37 00:03:26,594 --> 00:03:28,528 - Oh, you brute. - Give it to me! 38 00:03:28,596 --> 00:03:30,587 Oh, my heavens. 39 00:03:32,133 --> 00:03:34,693 I know I fought with my brother and sister. 40 00:03:34,769 --> 00:03:36,794 It's the law of sibling survival. 41 00:03:36,871 --> 00:03:39,863 But somehow I always remember Mom and Dad bringing us under control... 42 00:03:39,940 --> 00:03:42,101 with a kind but firm word. 43 00:03:42,176 --> 00:03:44,576 Quiet! 44 00:03:52,053 --> 00:03:53,987 Wow. 45 00:03:54,055 --> 00:03:56,819 Mom just reached max gross load. 46 00:03:56,891 --> 00:03:59,587 You're the gross load. Oh, yeah? Look who's talking. 47 00:03:59,660 --> 00:04:01,890 You're the one who ripped my shirt. 48 00:04:01,962 --> 00:04:04,192 What am I supposed to do about Peggy's shirt? 49 00:04:04,265 --> 00:04:06,495 My shirt. And you're gonna buy a new one for me. 50 00:04:06,567 --> 00:04:09,502 Enough, okay? Enough. 51 00:04:10,504 --> 00:04:13,769 Now it's nobody's shirt. Now it's just a... a torn rag. 52 00:04:13,841 --> 00:04:15,775 Where's my mommy? 53 00:04:15,843 --> 00:04:18,209 She's in front of you. 54 00:04:18,279 --> 00:04:20,440 That's not my mommy. That's a man. 55 00:04:20,514 --> 00:04:23,449 Wild. 56 00:04:25,319 --> 00:04:27,787 I want my mommy. 57 00:04:33,761 --> 00:04:35,888 Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Uh-oh, Mom. 58 00:04:35,963 --> 00:04:38,056 Baby breakdown. 59 00:04:38,132 --> 00:04:41,192 What's wrong with Teresa? Too much Sesame Street. 60 00:04:41,268 --> 00:04:43,202 I've never seen her do that before. 61 00:04:43,270 --> 00:04:45,204 Would... Would you, uh... 62 00:04:45,272 --> 00:04:49,140 Would you just, uh, go check on her? Why me? 63 00:04:49,210 --> 00:04:52,941 Yeah, sending Susan is like sending Jaws to get the kids out of the pool. 64 00:04:53,013 --> 00:04:57,916 I got science lab, Mom. First check on your sister. 65 00:04:58,986 --> 00:05:00,977 Please. 66 00:05:03,691 --> 00:05:08,253 You see before you a classic example of the devastating effects brought about... 67 00:05:08,329 --> 00:05:11,696 when parents brutally yell at their impressionable children. 68 00:05:11,765 --> 00:05:14,825 There's the signpost up ahead... Go to school. 69 00:05:14,902 --> 00:05:18,702 That's not my mommy. You would send me off to face the world... 70 00:05:18,772 --> 00:05:21,172 without breakfast? 71 00:05:24,745 --> 00:05:28,078 Uh, we... No, um... Course not. 72 00:05:30,484 --> 00:05:32,418 I'm sorry, Mom. 73 00:05:32,486 --> 00:05:35,580 I mean, I know this divorce thing has been real tough on you. 74 00:05:35,656 --> 00:05:37,624 I'm divorced. 75 00:05:37,691 --> 00:05:40,387 But like you said, the hard part is over. 76 00:05:40,461 --> 00:05:42,691 I di... I... I did. 77 00:05:42,763 --> 00:05:46,028 And that bimbo Dad ran off with is almost punishment enough. 78 00:05:46,100 --> 00:05:48,660 It's time to think about yourself. Yeah, well, 79 00:05:48,736 --> 00:05:50,704 uh, you know, it... it's... 80 00:05:50,771 --> 00:05:53,968 It's hard. Well, you're doin'it. 81 00:05:54,041 --> 00:05:56,305 I mean, you got your real estate license. 82 00:05:56,377 --> 00:05:59,505 I know you'll sell one of those tacky houses soon. 83 00:06:03,617 --> 00:06:05,551 I'm real proud of you, Mom. 84 00:06:05,619 --> 00:06:09,680 Wow. She has totally freaked out. 85 00:06:10,758 --> 00:06:14,194 What do you mean? She says you're not her mother. 86 00:06:14,261 --> 00:06:18,925 And get this. You're a strange man dressed in Mommy's clothes. 87 00:06:18,999 --> 00:06:22,594 Ooh. I mean, totally creepy. 88 00:06:22,670 --> 00:06:26,697 Residual flashbacks from your hippie days, Mom. 89 00:06:26,774 --> 00:06:29,368 I got her to come down and take another look. 90 00:06:29,443 --> 00:06:31,377 Come on, munchkin. 91 00:06:31,445 --> 00:06:33,538 Come on. 92 00:06:33,614 --> 00:06:35,548 See? It's Mommy. 93 00:06:37,651 --> 00:06:40,711 That's not my mommy. That's a man. 94 00:06:41,789 --> 00:06:43,882 So's the guy in the yucky shirt. 95 00:06:43,958 --> 00:06:47,291 This is my favorite shirt. This is cutting-edge stuff. 96 00:06:47,361 --> 00:06:48,885 It's yucky. 97 00:06:48,963 --> 00:06:51,830 This is too weird. 98 00:06:51,899 --> 00:06:55,266 I want my mommy! Mommy! 99 00:06:55,336 --> 00:06:57,463 Definitely too much Sesame Street. 100 00:06:57,538 --> 00:06:59,472 Sam, she... Mommy! 101 00:06:59,540 --> 00:07:01,474 She could see me. I know that. 102 00:07:01,542 --> 00:07:04,033 Finally, somebody agrees with me. 103 00:07:04,111 --> 00:07:06,136 Maybe somebody should, uh, talk to her. 104 00:07:06,213 --> 00:07:08,807 Do you... Do you think you could go and... and... 105 00:07:08,882 --> 00:07:11,146 talk to her again, uh, please? 106 00:07:11,218 --> 00:07:16,087 Mom, I'm 11. I won't have my psych degree for another 15 years. 107 00:07:16,156 --> 00:07:19,785 They don't give degrees to the hopelessly stupid. Okay. All right, please. 108 00:07:19,860 --> 00:07:22,454 You owe me for that shirt. 109 00:07:22,529 --> 00:07:26,693 Get real. Mom, don't forget. You've got carpool to Girl Scouts, 110 00:07:26,767 --> 00:07:30,464 and I have a fitting for my new soccer uniform this afternoon. 111 00:07:30,537 --> 00:07:33,631 - They got that gross blue. - This afternoon? 112 00:07:33,707 --> 00:07:35,800 - Mom, my swim meet is this afternoon. - Mommy. 113 00:07:35,876 --> 00:07:37,810 Look, you gotta be at my swim meet. 114 00:07:37,878 --> 00:07:41,177 All right. I'll be... Uh, wait. Wait. What about, uh, uh, Teresa? 115 00:07:41,248 --> 00:07:45,548 Oh, Mother Warrior, you must face her alone. 116 00:07:45,619 --> 00:07:49,419 Or at least until Rafaella gets here at noon. I gotta go. 117 00:07:50,524 --> 00:07:53,925 Mom, wear a dress to show that house this morning, will ya? 118 00:07:57,965 --> 00:07:59,956 House. 119 00:08:00,034 --> 00:08:02,025 Sam, 120 00:08:02,102 --> 00:08:06,971 Ziggy says that kids under the age of five exist in a... 121 00:08:07,041 --> 00:08:10,477 In a natural alpha state, and that's how come she could see me. 122 00:08:10,544 --> 00:08:13,035 That's why she can see you, but how can she see me? 123 00:08:13,113 --> 00:08:15,843 Animals and kids, that's great. What did she say after Girl Scouts? 124 00:08:15,916 --> 00:08:18,783 They're pure of heart. You know you can't lie to a kid. 125 00:08:18,852 --> 00:08:22,549 They see right through you. They see the real you. 126 00:08:22,623 --> 00:08:24,784 And little, uh... little, uh... Teresa. 127 00:08:24,858 --> 00:08:28,988 Ter... little Teresa, she sees only the truth. 128 00:08:31,198 --> 00:08:34,531 Problem is, the truth is her mother's gone. 129 00:08:34,601 --> 00:08:36,626 Mommy! 130 00:08:36,704 --> 00:08:38,968 What am I gonna do, Al? 131 00:08:41,408 --> 00:08:43,808 I guess you gotta tell her the truth. 132 00:08:43,877 --> 00:08:45,845 Please don't hide from me, Mommy. 133 00:08:45,913 --> 00:08:47,847 Poor kid. Okay. 134 00:08:47,915 --> 00:08:50,281 Where's my mommy? 135 00:08:57,124 --> 00:08:59,319 Um... 136 00:08:59,393 --> 00:09:01,554 Uh, your mommy, uh... 137 00:09:01,628 --> 00:09:03,619 Hummina, hummina. Your mommy. 138 00:09:03,697 --> 00:09:07,531 Oh, your mommy had to go away for a little while, but she's gonna be back real soon. 139 00:09:07,601 --> 00:09:11,401 Yeah, my name is Sam, and... and this is Al. 140 00:09:11,472 --> 00:09:13,702 And for the next couple of days, 141 00:09:13,774 --> 00:09:17,141 everybody's gonna pretend that I'm your mommy. 142 00:09:17,211 --> 00:09:19,145 That's good, Sam. Thank you. 143 00:09:19,213 --> 00:09:20,771 Why? 144 00:09:20,848 --> 00:09:23,442 Why? Why? Why? 145 00:09:23,517 --> 00:09:26,315 Um... 146 00:09:26,387 --> 00:09:28,719 Oh. To help your big brother. 147 00:09:28,789 --> 00:09:30,723 Do what? 148 00:09:30,791 --> 00:09:32,782 Do what? Do... 149 00:09:34,862 --> 00:09:38,161 Oh, uh, to... to win the swim meet. 150 00:09:38,232 --> 00:09:40,928 Are you angels? 151 00:09:41,001 --> 00:09:42,935 Yes. No. 152 00:09:43,003 --> 00:09:46,632 Yes, uh, this is Angel Sam, and I'm Angel Al. 153 00:09:46,707 --> 00:09:48,641 The truth, Al. 154 00:09:48,709 --> 00:09:51,143 Here, I'll show you. Try and touch my hand. 155 00:09:54,148 --> 00:09:56,275 Come on back here. 156 00:09:58,685 --> 00:10:01,552 - See? - You see, we're, uh, a couple of angels, 157 00:10:01,622 --> 00:10:03,920 and we're here to help Kevin win the swim meet. 158 00:10:03,991 --> 00:10:06,186 And after we do that, then we'll be gone, 159 00:10:06,260 --> 00:10:09,957 and... and your mommy will come back. Promise? 160 00:10:10,030 --> 00:10:12,089 Oh, yeah, promise. Promise. 161 00:10:12,166 --> 00:10:14,794 Can you fix it, please? 162 00:10:14,868 --> 00:10:19,635 Oh, uh, Wookiee. Wookiee, the dog ate the... Uh, Angel Sam is the... the doll elf. 163 00:10:20,641 --> 00:10:23,007 Uh, here. 164 00:10:23,076 --> 00:10:25,772 Then will you read me a story? 165 00:10:25,846 --> 00:10:28,007 What a great... That's a great idea. Yeah, but... 166 00:10:28,081 --> 00:10:30,515 But you gotta hold the book and turn the pages. Yeah. 167 00:10:30,584 --> 00:10:32,677 That's a good deal. 168 00:10:32,753 --> 00:10:36,519 Okay, you go pick out a book, and then I'll come right along. 169 00:10:42,396 --> 00:10:45,365 Okay, Al, what are we really here to do? 170 00:10:45,432 --> 00:10:49,266 Well, I didn't want to say it in front of her, 171 00:10:50,704 --> 00:10:53,002 but sometime in the next 24 hours... 172 00:10:53,073 --> 00:10:55,234 Kevin runs away from home and... 173 00:10:55,309 --> 00:10:57,243 And? 174 00:10:57,311 --> 00:11:00,041 He vanishes off the face of the earth. 175 00:11:01,415 --> 00:11:03,576 He can't just vanish. 176 00:11:03,650 --> 00:11:07,848 Six months later, his bloodied clothes were found in an abandoned van. 177 00:11:09,256 --> 00:11:11,918 They never found his body, Sam. 178 00:11:11,992 --> 00:11:14,688 And his mother never allowed the case to be closed. 179 00:11:28,040 --> 00:11:30,907 I'm really glad you're enjoying this positive parental experience, 180 00:11:30,977 --> 00:11:32,968 - I am. - But we have a problem here. 181 00:11:33,245 --> 00:11:36,146 Al, why would I come back as a mother? 182 00:11:36,215 --> 00:11:38,149 Well, because, uh, 183 00:11:38,217 --> 00:11:42,085 Dad is off having a severe case of midlife crisis. 184 00:11:42,154 --> 00:11:47,820 Well, fine. But how am I gonna find out why Kevin runs off if I don't even have time to turn around? 185 00:11:47,893 --> 00:11:50,555 I mean, would you look at this woman's schedule? 186 00:11:50,629 --> 00:11:53,757 Car pool, music lessons, Mommy and Me art class... That's just for today. 187 00:11:53,833 --> 00:11:56,267 Calm down. Okay, okay, okay. Luncheon for the P.T.A., music... 188 00:11:56,335 --> 00:11:59,600 Calm down already, all right? You're getting... You're gonna hyperventilate. 189 00:12:01,006 --> 00:12:03,600 Nobody ever said it was gonna be easy being a mother. 190 00:12:03,676 --> 00:12:09,308 But since you are a mother, you gotta figure out why your 15-year-old is gonna run away tonight. 191 00:12:12,051 --> 00:12:14,542 What's the worst thing you can remember about being 15? 192 00:12:14,620 --> 00:12:16,554 Who, me? Yeah. 193 00:12:16,622 --> 00:12:20,615 Oh. Getting busted by her parents just as I was... 194 00:12:20,693 --> 00:12:23,287 Al, Al. I doubt that this has anything to do with sex. 195 00:12:23,362 --> 00:12:25,728 Well, of course it... What else could it be about? 196 00:12:25,798 --> 00:12:28,062 Lots of things. I mean, when I was 15, I had... 197 00:12:28,133 --> 00:12:30,124 I had trouble because I was smart and shy. 198 00:12:30,202 --> 00:12:34,070 The kid is funny. He's not Einstein. Maybe it's a cover. 199 00:12:34,139 --> 00:12:36,903 Maybe he's using humor to hide his emotions. 200 00:12:36,976 --> 00:12:39,774 - All right. What are you gonna do? - I don't know. 201 00:12:39,845 --> 00:12:41,836 I don't know what I'm gonna do. 202 00:12:41,914 --> 00:12:45,281 But I know I can't... You know, I can't follow him around all day. 203 00:12:46,719 --> 00:12:49,244 What? 204 00:12:49,321 --> 00:12:52,813 I can't follow him around, but you can. No, no. 205 00:12:52,892 --> 00:12:54,416 Yes. Uh-uh. 206 00:12:54,493 --> 00:12:56,427 Yes. No. Lookit. 207 00:12:56,495 --> 00:12:59,328 Reading stories to the munchkin, okay, that's one thing. 208 00:12:59,398 --> 00:13:02,196 But Sam Spadeing a 15-year-old kid... forget it. 209 00:13:02,268 --> 00:13:04,236 Al, it's no problem. You get Gooshie, No. Uh-uh. 210 00:13:04,303 --> 00:13:07,670 He centers you in on Kevin, never knows you're there. Don't tell me about Gooshie. 211 00:13:07,740 --> 00:13:09,674 I'm not gonna do it. I really appreciate this. 212 00:13:09,742 --> 00:13:11,801 No. Thank you very much. 213 00:13:11,877 --> 00:13:14,846 It's out of the question. Al... I owe you one then, okay? 214 00:13:16,415 --> 00:13:18,781 Uh, we got somebody called Al for dinner? 215 00:13:26,191 --> 00:13:27,920 Hey, check it out, man. 216 00:13:27,993 --> 00:13:30,120 Baby has legs up to her neck. 217 00:13:30,195 --> 00:13:32,789 You gotta be kidding. She's a walking beanpole. 218 00:13:32,865 --> 00:13:36,198 A beanpole? And I guess you wouldn't like to climb it, right? 219 00:13:36,268 --> 00:13:38,202 Wouldn't or couldn't? 220 00:13:38,270 --> 00:13:41,933 She's jailbait. Oh, yeah? And what are you, runt? 221 00:13:42,007 --> 00:13:46,273 Too hip to rob the cradle, no matter how many points. 222 00:13:46,345 --> 00:13:50,441 Now, if the Kev were truly lookin' for some action, 223 00:13:50,516 --> 00:13:52,450 he'd go after, uh, 224 00:13:53,452 --> 00:13:55,386 Jackie Arnett. 225 00:13:57,756 --> 00:13:59,815 - Oh! - Jackie. 226 00:13:59,892 --> 00:14:01,826 Ahhh. Jackie. 227 00:14:01,894 --> 00:14:05,728 Jackie! Jackie! Jackie! Jackie! 228 00:14:05,798 --> 00:14:07,732 Jackie! Jackie! Jackie! 229 00:14:07,800 --> 00:14:09,859 Stop it, guys! 230 00:14:09,935 --> 00:14:12,802 She's, uh, not my speed. 231 00:14:12,871 --> 00:14:16,568 What is your speed, micro-stud? Reverse? 232 00:14:16,642 --> 00:14:19,907 She happens to live a couple of blocks from me, and we've become... 233 00:14:19,979 --> 00:14:21,913 friendly. 234 00:14:21,981 --> 00:14:24,541 Jackie Arnett is friendly with anybody that'll say hello. 235 00:14:24,616 --> 00:14:28,814 That's a lie. Come on, Kev. The whole track team's had her, buddy. 236 00:14:28,887 --> 00:14:32,084 I said that's a lie. He defends her honor. 237 00:14:32,157 --> 00:14:34,387 Ah. Perhaps this is true love. 238 00:14:34,460 --> 00:14:40,057 Absolutely love. Oh, but she wouldn't be desperate enough for a class "C" creature like Kevin. 239 00:14:40,132 --> 00:14:43,590 Class "C." I like it, man. Speak for yourself, zero charisma. 240 00:14:46,305 --> 00:14:48,705 All I'm sayin'is she's not like that. 241 00:14:48,774 --> 00:14:51,004 - Hey. That's nice, Kevin. - What is she like? 242 00:14:51,076 --> 00:14:56,173 She's a strumpet. Worth maybe, uh, 50 points. Right, Teddy, huh? 243 00:14:56,248 --> 00:15:00,150 Oh, not Demon and Dragon freaks. I hate that game. 244 00:15:00,219 --> 00:15:04,519 A challenge. A test of your noble manhood. 245 00:15:04,590 --> 00:15:08,026 Bring on the dragons, you warted trolls. 246 00:15:09,028 --> 00:15:10,962 Thank you, ladies. 247 00:15:11,030 --> 00:15:14,056 And bring back a sacred sign of his victory. 248 00:15:14,133 --> 00:15:17,193 Like her panties. Face the challenge, jester, 249 00:15:17,269 --> 00:15:18,930 and earn your knighthood. 250 00:15:19,004 --> 00:15:22,030 I smell a setup comin' here. 251 00:15:22,107 --> 00:15:24,041 So be it. 252 00:15:24,109 --> 00:15:26,907 Handle it, squire. Grow up. 253 00:15:26,979 --> 00:15:29,243 Never mind. I'll handle this myself. 254 00:15:34,520 --> 00:15:36,545 Hey, where's he going? 255 00:15:37,556 --> 00:15:40,218 To set the stage for your conquest. 256 00:15:40,292 --> 00:15:42,658 Yeah, just a little help from your friends, right? 257 00:15:42,728 --> 00:15:45,595 Gooshie, center me on Sam. 258 00:15:51,136 --> 00:15:54,572 I'm not gonna tell a 15-year-old boy how to seduce a girl. 259 00:15:54,640 --> 00:15:57,234 I don't see where you have any choice in this, Sam. 260 00:15:57,309 --> 00:15:59,277 The kid is... is... is... He's inexperienced. 261 00:15:59,344 --> 00:16:01,710 He's supposed to be inexperienced. He's 15. 262 00:16:01,780 --> 00:16:05,181 I kno... I'll have you know when I was fif... 263 00:16:05,250 --> 00:16:10,688 The fact that you were a practicing pervert at the age of five has nothing to do with the rest of the world. 264 00:16:10,756 --> 00:16:14,089 Words of wisdom from the world's most sexually backward teenager. 265 00:16:14,159 --> 00:16:16,389 This has nothing to do with my adolescent experience. 266 00:16:16,462 --> 00:16:20,592 Since you were sent here to help him, I figure it does. No. 267 00:16:20,666 --> 00:16:24,397 Listen, Mr. Moral, if you and I represent opposite ends of the sexual spectrum, 268 00:16:24,470 --> 00:16:27,405 that puts Kevin about normal. No. 269 00:16:27,473 --> 00:16:31,102 You gotta help him, Sam. His buddies are setting him up for a fall. 270 00:16:31,176 --> 00:16:33,474 When he takes it, he runs away. 271 00:16:33,545 --> 00:16:36,446 Besides, I think he likes the girl. 272 00:16:37,483 --> 00:16:40,941 How would you know? Well, he defended her honor. 273 00:16:41,019 --> 00:16:44,682 I mean, you never defend a girl's honor unless you... you really like her. 274 00:16:48,727 --> 00:16:53,790 No. No, I'm not going to encourage a 15-year-old boy to have sexual intercourse. 275 00:16:53,866 --> 00:16:56,858 What's secular undercourse? 276 00:16:59,404 --> 00:17:02,498 Uh, it's a game grown-ups play. 277 00:17:02,574 --> 00:17:06,032 Why... Why... Why don't we, uh, wash up for dinner? 278 00:17:06,111 --> 00:17:09,137 I'm too little to wash up for dinner. 279 00:17:09,214 --> 00:17:10,647 What, to wash up? 280 00:17:13,152 --> 00:17:15,086 See? 281 00:17:15,154 --> 00:17:17,384 Oh. Oh, yeah. Let... Let me help you. 282 00:17:17,456 --> 00:17:19,822 Let me... Let me help you. 283 00:17:19,892 --> 00:17:22,486 Let me have this dolly, please. 284 00:17:23,762 --> 00:17:25,753 Al, what if we teach him about romance? 285 00:17:25,831 --> 00:17:28,698 Romance? I'm sure you've heard of it. 286 00:17:28,767 --> 00:17:31,327 The art of making someone fall in love with you. 287 00:17:31,403 --> 00:17:34,429 Well, what kind of acceptance is that gonna give him? 288 00:17:34,506 --> 00:17:37,669 It's gonna get him honor. 289 00:17:37,743 --> 00:17:41,110 These demons are on a quest, and it isn't for honor. 290 00:17:41,180 --> 00:17:44,081 Look, if Kevin goes about this the right way... 291 00:17:44,149 --> 00:17:46,083 and ends up with the girl he likes, 292 00:17:46,151 --> 00:17:49,518 then his warrior buddies are gonna have to back off, right? 293 00:17:49,588 --> 00:17:51,579 Then he won't run away. 294 00:17:51,657 --> 00:17:53,648 Simple. 295 00:17:54,927 --> 00:17:57,919 Oh, no! Oh, no. 296 00:17:57,996 --> 00:18:01,227 Hmm. What do you think, Teresa? 297 00:18:01,300 --> 00:18:03,598 Yuck. It's ruined. 298 00:18:03,669 --> 00:18:08,732 I hope you're better at romance than whatever that was supposed to be. 299 00:18:11,510 --> 00:18:14,809 Teresa, what do you say we go pick up your brother and sister, 300 00:18:14,880 --> 00:18:17,007 and we'll all go out to eat? 301 00:18:17,082 --> 00:18:19,380 - Pizza! - Pizza! 302 00:18:19,451 --> 00:18:21,385 Pizza. No pizza for you. 303 00:18:47,879 --> 00:18:49,813 Susan. Susan. 304 00:18:51,250 --> 00:18:54,845 Please come back. Get your books and your uniform, all right? 305 00:18:54,920 --> 00:18:58,356 - Mom, I'm gonna miss Magnum. - It's gonna run for the next eight years, okay? 306 00:18:58,423 --> 00:19:00,357 I think you got a little time. 307 00:19:00,425 --> 00:19:02,916 Come here. Look at your face. 308 00:19:02,995 --> 00:19:06,522 Will you take Teresa upstairs and wash the ice cream off of her face? 309 00:19:07,933 --> 00:19:10,163 Thank you. Come on, munchkin. 310 00:19:10,235 --> 00:19:13,068 No. I want to stay with Sam. 311 00:19:13,138 --> 00:19:15,072 Honey... 312 00:19:16,375 --> 00:19:20,072 Would you... Would you do me a favor and, uh, take my purse in for me? 313 00:19:20,145 --> 00:19:22,443 It's kind of heavy. You got it? 314 00:19:22,514 --> 00:19:25,312 I can do it, Sam. Thank you. 315 00:19:33,692 --> 00:19:35,683 You okay? 316 00:19:36,695 --> 00:19:38,686 Yeah. Yeah, I'm great. 317 00:19:38,764 --> 00:19:42,495 I mean, uh, everything all right? 318 00:19:43,568 --> 00:19:47,470 Yeah, sure. I was just drifting in the ozone. 319 00:19:51,743 --> 00:19:53,836 Hey, uh, Kevin, you, uh... 320 00:19:53,912 --> 00:19:55,880 Wanna play some Ping-Pong? 321 00:19:57,049 --> 00:19:59,210 You hate Ping-Pong. 322 00:19:59,284 --> 00:20:01,218 I do? 323 00:20:01,286 --> 00:20:03,777 Well, I mean, that's because... 324 00:20:03,855 --> 00:20:06,221 I didn't want you to know how good I was. 325 00:20:06,291 --> 00:20:08,350 Come on. 326 00:20:20,572 --> 00:20:22,540 Nice shot, Mom. 327 00:20:22,607 --> 00:20:25,098 Whenever my, uh, 328 00:20:25,177 --> 00:20:27,805 dad wanted to have a heart-to-heart with us, 329 00:20:27,879 --> 00:20:30,404 usually it took place over a Ping-Pong table. 330 00:20:31,483 --> 00:20:34,043 So, uh, what do you wanna talk about? 331 00:20:36,688 --> 00:20:40,249 Well, you looked like you needed someone to talk to. Nope. 332 00:20:42,894 --> 00:20:46,193 Look, come on. Kevin, I know that... that there's somethin' bothering you. 333 00:20:47,833 --> 00:20:50,028 Too cool to talk to your mom? 334 00:20:52,938 --> 00:20:54,929 It's just... 335 00:20:55,006 --> 00:20:56,940 You know, guy stuff. 336 00:20:58,210 --> 00:21:00,735 Yeah, well, you know, if it has to do with girls, 337 00:21:00,812 --> 00:21:03,542 I... I... I might know more than... More than you think. 338 00:21:03,615 --> 00:21:06,015 Yeah, I know. You used to be one. 339 00:21:06,084 --> 00:21:08,951 Yeah. Well, uh... 340 00:21:11,490 --> 00:21:13,424 No. No, that's not what I meant. 341 00:21:13,492 --> 00:21:15,426 I mean, if... if you wanna... 342 00:21:15,494 --> 00:21:18,588 If you need to talk to them, or, you know, find out what... 343 00:21:18,663 --> 00:21:21,928 You know, things that they like to hear, you know? 344 00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:26,664 Like, um, do you know where to put your hands when you dance with a girl? 345 00:21:26,738 --> 00:21:30,902 This is, uh, too weird. 346 00:21:30,976 --> 00:21:33,137 You know, I can't talk to you because you're... 347 00:21:33,211 --> 00:21:35,771 - You're my mom. - Sam. 348 00:21:35,847 --> 00:21:38,441 Me and Wookiee made a painting. 349 00:21:38,517 --> 00:21:39,779 Oh, Teresa. 350 00:21:39,851 --> 00:21:43,116 Hey, you know, I think it's kind of punk. 351 00:21:43,188 --> 00:21:45,122 Oh, no, Wookiee, come ba... Here. 352 00:21:46,224 --> 00:21:48,385 Oh, Teresa. Okay, here we go. 353 00:21:48,460 --> 00:21:50,690 Oh, don't touch any... Wookiee, get off the couch! 354 00:21:50,762 --> 00:21:52,992 "Sam." 355 00:22:19,090 --> 00:22:21,422 See you. Bye. 356 00:22:30,769 --> 00:22:32,737 Hi, Mom. 357 00:22:50,822 --> 00:22:54,724 Come on, Jackie. It's a hysterical idea. 358 00:22:54,793 --> 00:22:57,853 Besides, it's, uh, just sort of an initiation. 359 00:22:57,929 --> 00:22:59,863 It still seems mean. 360 00:22:59,931 --> 00:23:02,491 You're not gonna back out on us now, are you, Jackie? 361 00:23:02,567 --> 00:23:05,559 Come on. He might get a little mad at first. 362 00:23:05,637 --> 00:23:08,629 But once he's a full wizard, he's gonna be totally grateful. 363 00:23:08,707 --> 00:23:10,698 Totally. 364 00:23:10,775 --> 00:23:13,437 Of course, as class president, 365 00:23:13,512 --> 00:23:17,243 whoever I take to the Mardi Gras Dance is crowned queen. 366 00:23:17,315 --> 00:23:21,479 But if you wouldn't like the honor, I'm sure that I could... I already told my mom. 367 00:23:21,553 --> 00:23:23,851 Then we're on? 368 00:23:25,891 --> 00:23:28,917 Okay. Call Kevin and tell him to be here at 8:00. 369 00:23:28,994 --> 00:23:31,428 Yeah. Yeah. Yeah! 370 00:23:31,496 --> 00:23:34,897 This morning was like any other on Oahu. 371 00:23:34,966 --> 00:23:38,493 A beautiful woman named Christie DeBolt had hired me to, 372 00:23:38,570 --> 00:23:42,904 uh, play games with her sister Louise. 373 00:23:42,974 --> 00:23:47,377 She said games. I would have said helping a rich girl live out her fantasies. 374 00:23:47,445 --> 00:23:50,141 Okay, so it wasn't like any other morning, 375 00:23:50,215 --> 00:23:53,878 but one has to be ready to expect the unexpected. 376 00:23:53,952 --> 00:23:57,251 At any rate, I wasn't gonna let it affect my workout. 377 00:23:59,291 --> 00:24:00,952 Hi, guys. 378 00:24:05,564 --> 00:24:09,967 I'd never seen a black orchid before, although technically they can't exist, you know. 379 00:24:10,969 --> 00:24:14,496 - The box doesn't have the florist's name on it... - What do you see in that geek? 380 00:24:14,573 --> 00:24:18,509 What are you, blind? The man is terminally gorgeous. 381 00:24:18,577 --> 00:24:20,909 He's a "wuz. " Please. 382 00:24:20,979 --> 00:24:23,209 You have a major case ofjealousy. 383 00:24:23,281 --> 00:24:25,977 Of what? The guy talks like he's been sucking helium, 384 00:24:26,051 --> 00:24:27,985 and he giggles like a girl. 385 00:24:28,053 --> 00:24:31,147 The only thing that matters is that he's sensitive, 386 00:24:31,222 --> 00:24:34,658 and he understands the needs of a woman. 387 00:24:34,726 --> 00:24:37,991 And what makes you such an expert on a woman's needs, runt? 388 00:24:38,063 --> 00:24:40,657 Knowledge by gender, jerk. 389 00:24:40,732 --> 00:24:42,996 Take the orchid back into the house, Higgins. 390 00:24:43,068 --> 00:24:45,901 I'd like to meet the owner, if you don't mind. Uh, 391 00:24:47,205 --> 00:24:49,673 Sue, 392 00:24:49,741 --> 00:24:52,767 if you had a guy that, 393 00:24:52,844 --> 00:24:55,108 like... you know, he liked you, 394 00:24:56,715 --> 00:24:59,149 what would he have to do to, uh... 395 00:25:00,218 --> 00:25:03,051 - You know. - I'm 11. 396 00:25:03,121 --> 00:25:06,852 I don't have to deal with that teenage mating ritual crap. 397 00:25:07,892 --> 00:25:12,556 But I'll tell you one thing. You wouldn't be the school joke. 398 00:25:15,634 --> 00:25:17,829 Hey, you creep, I was watching that! 399 00:25:17,902 --> 00:25:21,269 I'm not gonna stay here and put up with your garbage! 400 00:25:21,339 --> 00:25:24,399 Tell Mom I'm going to Anita's to watch TV. 401 00:25:32,183 --> 00:25:34,174 Wait a minute. Wait a minute. 402 00:25:35,220 --> 00:25:37,450 You didn't tell me you were goin' out tonight. 403 00:25:37,522 --> 00:25:41,720 Yeah, sure I did. Remember last night I said me and the guys were gonna go see Raiders again? 404 00:25:41,793 --> 00:25:44,193 I'm cold. Yeah, okay, okay. 405 00:25:44,262 --> 00:25:47,595 Um, I don't want you goin' out tonight. 406 00:25:47,666 --> 00:25:49,190 Mom. 407 00:25:49,267 --> 00:25:51,895 It's too late to be goin' out. It's not even 8:00! 408 00:25:51,970 --> 00:25:56,532 And what about Susan? You know, she's over at Anita's watching TV, and she's only 11. 409 00:25:56,608 --> 00:25:58,872 Anita's? Where's Anita's? Next door. 410 00:25:58,943 --> 00:26:02,504 - Are you okay, Mom? - He's not our mommy. 411 00:26:02,580 --> 00:26:05,048 Have you ever considered taking her to a baby shrink? 412 00:26:05,116 --> 00:26:07,243 I'm not a baby. 413 00:26:07,318 --> 00:26:09,343 Okay, a dwarf shrink. 414 00:26:09,421 --> 00:26:13,255 Look, Mom, I gotta go, or I'm gonna miss the rock rolling out of the cave. 415 00:26:13,324 --> 00:26:15,189 I said no. 416 00:26:22,934 --> 00:26:25,698 Kevin... I'm going to my room! Is that okay? 417 00:26:25,770 --> 00:26:29,399 I just thought maybe you could stay down with us and... 418 00:26:29,474 --> 00:26:31,465 No! Thanks! 419 00:26:35,146 --> 00:26:38,513 Sam, what's a dwarf? 420 00:27:17,455 --> 00:27:20,083 Sam, Mommy sings me songs. 421 00:27:20,158 --> 00:27:22,456 I... I don't know any new songs. Honest. 422 00:27:22,527 --> 00:27:24,995 Please. 423 00:27:26,664 --> 00:27:30,361 Couldn't ya... Couldn't ya just kind of just fall asleep yourself without a song? 424 00:27:35,440 --> 00:27:38,204 Four and four are eight 425 00:27:43,715 --> 00:27:46,741 Where have you been? Just go turn down the stereo, will ya? 426 00:27:48,219 --> 00:27:50,483 I'll sing you to sleep, honey. 427 00:27:50,555 --> 00:27:55,219 Inchworm Inchworm 428 00:27:59,464 --> 00:28:02,695 You and your arithmetic 429 00:28:02,767 --> 00:28:06,669 Will probably go far 430 00:28:06,738 --> 00:28:11,198 Inchworm Inchworm 431 00:28:29,093 --> 00:28:31,084 Al! 432 00:28:32,263 --> 00:28:34,356 Come on! Come on! 433 00:28:34,432 --> 00:28:38,334 God, Sam, I never really wanted to have kids... 434 00:28:38,403 --> 00:28:40,371 Kevin's gone. What? 435 00:28:40,438 --> 00:28:44,135 He wanted to go out earlier. Wanted to go to the movie with his friends. I wouldn't let him go. 436 00:28:44,209 --> 00:28:48,669 Yeah, but he... Oh, he left the stereo on, and he probably went out the window. 437 00:28:48,746 --> 00:28:51,909 I would have done the same thing. I forced him to run away. 438 00:28:51,983 --> 00:28:54,281 No, you didn't. Why? Telling him he couldn't go? 439 00:28:54,352 --> 00:28:57,981 No, no. It's those buddies of his. They've got the thumbscrews on him. 440 00:28:58,056 --> 00:29:00,183 Jackie Arnett. That's it. 441 00:29:00,258 --> 00:29:02,783 I'm gonna ask Ziggy for her address. Uh, what about Teresa? 442 00:29:02,861 --> 00:29:06,194 Uh, I'll stay here and keep an eye on her till you get back with Kevin. 443 00:29:06,264 --> 00:29:08,323 You're a hologram. What if something happens? 444 00:29:08,399 --> 00:29:11,800 Uh... Oh. Uh, Susan's next door. 445 00:29:11,870 --> 00:29:15,829 I'll go get her, and I'll call Rafaella to have her come over, all right? Okay, good. 446 00:29:15,907 --> 00:29:18,398 And I'll catch up with you when Rafaella gets here. 447 00:29:27,151 --> 00:29:29,312 You know, it... it was, uh, 448 00:29:29,387 --> 00:29:32,015 real nice of you to invite me over, Jackie. 449 00:29:34,626 --> 00:29:38,756 Look, Kevin, you don't have to be nice to me. 450 00:29:38,830 --> 00:29:42,231 You don't even have to talk to me if you don't want to. 451 00:29:42,300 --> 00:29:44,291 We could just get started. 452 00:29:44,369 --> 00:29:47,770 Well, what about your parents? 453 00:29:47,839 --> 00:29:50,740 At the Davenports. It's their bridge night. 454 00:29:51,464 --> 00:29:53,864 So, we're alone until at least 11. 455 00:29:58,082 --> 00:30:01,745 Why are you doing this? Doing what? 456 00:30:01,819 --> 00:30:04,583 Well, I mean... I mean, you know me... 457 00:30:05,857 --> 00:30:07,791 Well, I mean, 458 00:30:07,859 --> 00:30:10,487 do you even really like me? 459 00:30:10,561 --> 00:30:14,463 Not that you wouldn't like me if you got to know me better. 460 00:30:14,532 --> 00:30:17,296 Does it matter? 461 00:30:17,368 --> 00:30:19,928 It does to me. 462 00:30:21,272 --> 00:30:23,968 Why don't you just go over there and take your clothes off, 463 00:30:24,042 --> 00:30:26,510 and I'll put another tape in. 464 00:30:40,191 --> 00:30:42,489 It's okay. 465 00:30:47,932 --> 00:30:49,923 Take 'em off. 466 00:31:06,117 --> 00:31:08,085 Um... 467 00:31:08,152 --> 00:31:10,643 I, uh... 468 00:31:10,722 --> 00:31:12,781 I don't know what to do. 469 00:31:14,525 --> 00:31:16,516 Kevin, 470 00:31:16,594 --> 00:31:18,585 are you a virgin? 471 00:31:18,663 --> 00:31:22,599 Uh, virgin? 472 00:31:22,667 --> 00:31:24,601 Yeah. 473 00:31:24,669 --> 00:31:26,603 I'd really like to know. 474 00:31:30,742 --> 00:31:34,041 - Yes. Micro Man's a virgin! 475 00:31:34,112 --> 00:31:37,240 "I don't know what to do. " 476 00:31:37,315 --> 00:31:40,307 He said he didn't know what to do. 477 00:31:40,385 --> 00:31:42,319 "I'm a virgin. " 478 00:31:42,387 --> 00:31:44,855 - Kevin! - Oh, Virgin Man. Where you goin', Virgin Man? 479 00:31:44,922 --> 00:31:47,117 Hey, Virgin Man! Where you goin', buddy? 480 00:31:47,191 --> 00:31:50,058 - What's the matter? Did you get embarrassed? - Kevin! 481 00:31:50,128 --> 00:31:54,360 Kevin, come back! Hey, micro-stud, come on back. I'll tell you what to do! 482 00:31:54,432 --> 00:31:59,961 Virgin Man, where you goin'? Where's your sense ofhumor, buddy? He lost it. 483 00:32:00,038 --> 00:32:03,030 Yo, wimp. Guy's a major wimp. 484 00:32:03,107 --> 00:32:05,098 Man, it was good! 485 00:32:28,898 --> 00:32:30,628 I can't believe you made me do that! 486 00:32:30,701 --> 00:32:33,693 Hey, what's your problem, huh? That was really cruel! 487 00:32:33,770 --> 00:32:36,796 - It was great! - Didn't you see how freaked out he was? 488 00:32:36,873 --> 00:32:40,331 Oh, do I detect the pangs of remorse? 489 00:32:40,410 --> 00:32:42,207 You said he'd think it was funny. 490 00:32:42,279 --> 00:32:44,270 So he doesn't have a sense of humor. 491 00:32:44,348 --> 00:32:46,475 He will after we tell the whole school. 492 00:32:46,550 --> 00:32:49,383 - No! - Hey, I think she likes him. 493 00:32:49,453 --> 00:32:52,513 Well, he's got a lot more going for him than you losers. 494 00:32:52,589 --> 00:32:55,319 Hey, get your nose out of the clouds and get real. 495 00:32:55,392 --> 00:32:58,555 - You're just as guilty as the rest of us. - Guilty of what? 496 00:33:02,232 --> 00:33:06,100 - Guilty of what? - It was supposed to be a joke, Mrs. Bruckner. 497 00:33:06,169 --> 00:33:09,332 - Where's Kevin? - I don't know. He rode off on his bike. 498 00:33:09,406 --> 00:33:11,067 He sure did. Kevin's not here? 499 00:33:11,141 --> 00:33:13,507 - Rode off on his bike. - Yes, ma'am. 500 00:33:13,577 --> 00:33:16,546 - Where would he go? - He probably went straight home. 501 00:33:18,715 --> 00:33:21,775 When Kevin disappeared, his bike was found abandoned on Bell Road. 502 00:33:21,852 --> 00:33:24,047 - Where's Bell Road? - Two blocks to the right. 503 00:33:24,121 --> 00:33:26,055 Mrs. Bruckner, I'm sorry. 504 00:33:26,123 --> 00:33:27,715 Tell Kevin. 505 00:33:28,792 --> 00:33:34,196 Man, with a mother like that I'd still be a virgin too. 506 00:33:34,264 --> 00:33:37,358 You are still a virgin, pimple-puss. 507 00:33:37,434 --> 00:33:39,925 And you're gonna be a virgin for another six years. 508 00:33:40,003 --> 00:33:41,937 I tell ya. 509 00:34:01,925 --> 00:34:04,086 Ziggy's tryin'to get a lock on him. 510 00:34:04,161 --> 00:34:07,096 Think maybe he went back home? 511 00:34:07,164 --> 00:34:09,428 No, I don't think so. 512 00:34:09,499 --> 00:34:12,297 They obviously embarrassed him pretty good. 513 00:34:13,437 --> 00:34:15,530 I figure they must have talked Jackie in... 514 00:34:15,605 --> 00:34:18,233 - Uh-oh. Sam... - I see it. 515 00:34:20,977 --> 00:34:24,435 Ah! Okay. Here! He's got him. 516 00:34:24,514 --> 00:34:28,211 Uh, they're in a vehicle three kilometers straight ahead of us. 517 00:34:28,285 --> 00:34:30,480 Maybe... Maybe he hitchhiked. 518 00:34:33,256 --> 00:34:36,020 No. No, he didn't. 519 00:34:36,093 --> 00:34:38,391 It's a van. 520 00:34:39,830 --> 00:34:41,923 Can't you make this thing go any faster? 521 00:34:41,998 --> 00:34:45,490 I got it on the floor. We shouldn't be in a stupid station wagon. 522 00:34:45,569 --> 00:34:48,163 There it is. 523 00:34:48,238 --> 00:34:50,433 Al, you think maybe, uh... 524 00:34:51,441 --> 00:34:55,207 You think maybe you could center in on Kevin just to... What? 525 00:34:55,278 --> 00:34:57,473 Just... Just to be with him. 526 00:34:57,547 --> 00:35:00,482 But I can't do anything. He won't even know I'm there. 527 00:35:01,918 --> 00:35:03,886 I'll know. 528 00:35:10,560 --> 00:35:12,551 Hang in there, kid. 529 00:35:12,629 --> 00:35:14,995 Just hang in there. 530 00:35:25,408 --> 00:35:28,866 You lay one hand on this kid, you slime bag, 531 00:35:28,945 --> 00:35:31,072 and I'll kill you. 532 00:35:32,082 --> 00:35:35,677 I don't know how, but I'll kill ya. 533 00:36:36,112 --> 00:36:40,742 See, what'd I tell you, kid? It's just likeJohn Wayne comin' with the cavalry! 534 00:36:59,436 --> 00:37:01,597 Is Kevin all right? Yeah, he will be, 535 00:37:01,671 --> 00:37:04,003 as soon as you take care of these sickos. 536 00:37:05,542 --> 00:37:07,510 "These"? What, there are two of'em? 537 00:37:08,678 --> 00:37:11,476 Yeah, there's two of'em. 538 00:37:24,628 --> 00:37:26,653 I know... 539 00:37:26,730 --> 00:37:29,460 - I know this? - Oh, yeah. 540 00:37:29,532 --> 00:37:32,194 You know judo, you know karate, you know, uh, uh, mui thai, 541 00:37:32,269 --> 00:37:34,328 you know tae kwon do... Uh-oh. 542 00:37:37,540 --> 00:37:40,134 Watch out for the knife, Sam. It could be sharp. 543 00:37:44,848 --> 00:37:47,248 All right! 544 00:37:48,885 --> 00:37:51,319 Good moves. You're better than Bruce Lee. Bruce Lee? 545 00:37:51,388 --> 00:37:54,289 Never mind. We gotta get Kevin outta here before these sickos wake up. 546 00:37:55,258 --> 00:37:57,249 Mom? 547 00:38:00,864 --> 00:38:03,992 Mom! Mom! I thought I'd never see you again! 548 00:38:04,067 --> 00:38:06,729 I know. You know, I wasn't runnin' away, Mom. Honest. 549 00:38:06,803 --> 00:38:08,771 I know that too. 550 00:38:14,711 --> 00:38:16,702 Let's go. Good idea. 551 00:38:20,383 --> 00:38:22,908 Mom, how? 552 00:38:24,621 --> 00:38:26,748 Girl Scouts. Come on. 553 00:38:26,823 --> 00:38:28,814 Girl Scouts? 554 00:38:29,993 --> 00:38:31,984 Awesome. 555 00:38:45,342 --> 00:38:47,333 I gotta go. 556 00:38:52,849 --> 00:38:55,716 I know I treat you like a turkey sometimes, 557 00:38:56,920 --> 00:39:00,048 but... I'm real glad... 558 00:39:04,594 --> 00:39:06,585 You know. 559 00:39:09,666 --> 00:39:11,725 Bye. Bye, Mom. 560 00:39:21,277 --> 00:39:24,769 I... I don't know exactly what happened at Jackie's last night, but, um... 561 00:39:26,850 --> 00:39:28,977 Well, I got a pretty good idea. 562 00:39:29,052 --> 00:39:31,043 Oh, boy. 563 00:39:32,222 --> 00:39:34,281 I know it had something to do with sex. 564 00:39:34,357 --> 00:39:37,224 Mom. It's not a dirty word, Kevin. 565 00:39:41,965 --> 00:39:44,957 The guys... found out I'm a virgin. 566 00:39:45,034 --> 00:39:47,798 Aha. 567 00:39:47,871 --> 00:39:50,339 They're gonna blab it all over school. 568 00:39:51,608 --> 00:39:55,339 That's a tough one. You bet it is. I'm nearly 16. 569 00:39:56,780 --> 00:39:58,771 I was a virgin when I was sixteen. 570 00:39:58,848 --> 00:40:02,249 You're a girl. You're supposed to be. 571 00:40:05,422 --> 00:40:07,549 Kevin, 572 00:40:07,624 --> 00:40:09,558 you know, it doesn't matter... 573 00:40:09,626 --> 00:40:12,823 if you're male or female when it comes to losing your virginity. 574 00:40:14,564 --> 00:40:17,795 And... And there's no special age when it has to happen, 575 00:40:17,867 --> 00:40:20,427 but there should be a special reason. 576 00:40:23,173 --> 00:40:25,767 When... 577 00:40:25,842 --> 00:40:28,072 When you love someone so much that... 578 00:40:29,078 --> 00:40:32,138 making love with them is the most natural way of expressing it. 579 00:40:36,119 --> 00:40:38,246 I never thought about it that way. 580 00:40:38,321 --> 00:40:40,482 Yeah, well, 581 00:40:40,557 --> 00:40:43,583 before that time comes, um, 582 00:40:43,660 --> 00:40:46,720 there are some other things we should talk about, okay? 583 00:40:46,796 --> 00:40:50,061 Okay? I mean, you're 15, 584 00:40:50,133 --> 00:40:53,625 and... you should just give yourself a little time. 585 00:40:55,872 --> 00:40:57,806 Okay. 586 00:40:57,874 --> 00:41:00,069 Okay. I gotta go. 587 00:41:00,143 --> 00:41:02,373 Yeah. Oh, here, leave that. I'll get it. 588 00:41:14,858 --> 00:41:16,792 Thanks, Mom. 589 00:41:18,161 --> 00:41:20,152 Okay. See ya. 590 00:41:20,230 --> 00:41:22,221 Yeah. Yeah. Have a good day. 591 00:41:27,704 --> 00:41:30,366 That was nicely done, Sam. You think so? 592 00:41:30,440 --> 00:41:32,431 Yeah. Why haven't I leaped? 593 00:41:32,509 --> 00:41:36,445 Uh, because I'm having such a great time with Teresa. 594 00:41:37,580 --> 00:41:41,380 Uh, you'll probably leap as soon as Kevin confronts his friends. 595 00:41:41,451 --> 00:41:44,284 Your laundry's done. 596 00:42:02,038 --> 00:42:04,836 Halfling's life is about to end. 597 00:42:04,908 --> 00:42:07,468 Death by virginity. 598 00:42:13,149 --> 00:42:15,140 Kevin. 599 00:42:17,687 --> 00:42:20,884 I'm sorry. Last night was stupid and mean, 600 00:42:20,957 --> 00:42:23,551 and I wouldn't blame you if you never wanted to talk to me again. 601 00:42:24,961 --> 00:42:28,624 But I'd really, really like it if you'd want to be my date for Mardi Gras. 602 00:42:35,138 --> 00:42:37,436 Only if you don't wear heels. 603 00:42:37,507 --> 00:42:39,668 Come on. 604 00:42:39,742 --> 00:42:43,337 Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Virgin Man. 605 00:42:45,982 --> 00:42:48,348 You've gotta be kidding. 606 00:42:48,418 --> 00:42:51,012 Ooh! 607 00:42:51,087 --> 00:42:55,023 Ooh! 608 00:42:55,091 --> 00:42:58,322 Busted by a jester. How degrading. 609 00:42:58,394 --> 00:43:01,192 You know, this means we're gonna have to make him a wizard. 610 00:43:01,264 --> 00:43:03,459 We can't give him ultimate power. 611 00:43:03,533 --> 00:43:05,831 I don't think you guys, uh, have a choice. 612 00:43:05,902 --> 00:43:09,463 Kevin! Kevin! Kevin! Kevin! Kevin! 613 00:43:09,539 --> 00:43:12,599 Kevin! Kevin! Kevin! Kevin! 614 00:43:14,944 --> 00:43:16,935 Okay, now, what do we call this one? 615 00:43:17,013 --> 00:43:19,379 She's a little young, Al. 616 00:43:19,449 --> 00:43:22,009 Um, Tyrannosaurus rex. 617 00:43:29,692 --> 00:43:31,660 And this one? 618 00:43:31,728 --> 00:43:34,162 Um, 619 00:43:34,230 --> 00:43:36,323 stegosaurus. 620 00:43:36,399 --> 00:43:38,629 Right. 621 00:43:40,203 --> 00:43:42,137 How about this one? 622 00:43:43,573 --> 00:43:47,202 Um, diplodocus. Yeah. 623 00:43:47,276 --> 00:43:49,039 Right. 624 00:43:53,483 --> 00:43:56,077 Al. 625 00:44:01,991 --> 00:44:03,982 Teresa, 626 00:44:05,795 --> 00:44:08,525 your mommy's coming back. 627 00:44:08,598 --> 00:44:11,226 Mommy? Yeah. 628 00:44:11,300 --> 00:44:13,393 Can you stay? 629 00:44:13,469 --> 00:44:16,063 No. 630 00:44:17,440 --> 00:44:19,533 But I don't want you to go. 631 00:44:21,277 --> 00:44:23,245 Well, I don't want to go. 632 00:44:23,312 --> 00:44:25,837 But I'm gonna come back. I don't know when, 633 00:44:25,915 --> 00:44:27,906 but I'll come back. 634 00:44:27,984 --> 00:44:29,781 Promise? 635 00:44:29,852 --> 00:44:31,843 I promise. 636 00:44:51,074 --> 00:44:53,065 Play now. Play now. 637 00:44:54,877 --> 00:44:58,472 - Come on. Come on. - Go Jaguars! 638 00:45:05,388 --> 00:45:07,322 Oh, boy.