1
00:00:03,378 --> 00:00:06,297
CHOIR:
♪ The Simpsons ♪
2
00:00:06,381 --> 00:00:07,382
(tires screeching)
3
00:00:09,509 --> 00:00:10,343
D'oh!
4
00:00:10,760 --> 00:00:11,511
(screams)
5
00:00:11,594 --> 00:00:12,512
(tires screeching)
6
00:00:28,194 --> 00:00:31,197
Hey, Lis,
there's your boyfriend.
7
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(softly moans)
8
00:00:35,744 --> 00:00:36,953
(chuckling)
9
00:00:37,037 --> 00:00:38,079
Oh, yeah?
10
00:00:38,163 --> 00:00:39,706
Well, there's
your girlfriend.
11
00:00:39,789 --> 00:00:44,085
(nonsensical sounds)
12
00:00:44,169 --> 00:00:45,754
Yeah, well,
you love Moleman.
13
00:00:45,837 --> 00:00:47,213
No, you do.
14
00:00:47,297 --> 00:00:50,425
You're gay for Moleman!
15
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No one's gay for Moleman.
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(grunting)
17
00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:01,978
Where are we?
18
00:01:02,062 --> 00:01:03,605
You're gay for Moleman!
19
00:01:03,688 --> 00:01:06,941
Bart, Lisa, welcome.
I've been expecting you.
20
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(impressed gasps)
21
00:01:10,153 --> 00:01:11,863
Your gasps are appropriate,
22
00:01:11,946 --> 00:01:15,492
because I have perfectly
predicted the future.
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How did you know
we were coming?
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00:01:18,536 --> 00:01:19,621
Because, my dear,
25
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I have mastered
the one true science:
26
00:01:22,665 --> 00:01:24,000
astrology.
27
00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:25,877
Don't you mean astronomy?
28
00:01:25,960 --> 00:01:28,004
No, my dear,
I said astrology.
29
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:29,172
For years, you see,
30
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astrology was the Tampa Bay
Devil Rays of the sciences...
31
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not so good.
32
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But with new,
more powerful computers,
33
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astrology can show you
the future.
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Would you like to see
yourselves as teenagers?
35
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No.
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Let's go there now.
37
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Feast your eyes
on the wondrous world
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00:01:47,732 --> 00:01:50,652
of eight years
from Tuesday.
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(crashing)
40
00:02:10,213 --> 00:02:13,049
Kids, come down
for your prom photo.
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00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:15,510
Ooh...
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Smile.
43
00:02:20,974 --> 00:02:22,350
Oh, it's so great.
44
00:02:22,433 --> 00:02:23,476
We can do anything
45
00:02:23,560 --> 00:02:25,812
now that scientists
have invented magic.
46
00:02:25,895 --> 00:02:27,814
I'm so proud of you.
47
00:02:27,897 --> 00:02:31,025
Lisa, graduating
two years early,
48
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and, Bart...
graduating.
49
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What'd I miss?
What'd I miss?
50
00:02:36,865 --> 00:02:39,450
Homer,
we're separated now.
51
00:02:39,534 --> 00:02:41,911
You can't just walk in
without knocking.
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00:02:41,995 --> 00:02:44,414
Well, maybe I was
partying so hard
53
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with my single friends
last night,
54
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I forgot the rules.
55
00:02:48,459 --> 00:02:51,254
Could you please stop
fighting in front of us?
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00:02:51,337 --> 00:02:53,840
Why? Is it
messing you up?
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Ooh...
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00:02:55,216 --> 00:02:57,093
Homer, just
settle down.
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We just got a postcard
from Maggie.
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She's really
enjoying Alaska.
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Stupid wildlife,
serves 'em right.
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00:03:09,314 --> 00:03:11,941
(doorbell rings)
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00:03:12,025 --> 00:03:14,319
Lisa, your date's here.
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Hey, Lisa.
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Milhouse?! Ugh!
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00:03:17,197 --> 00:03:18,781
I've been turning him
down for the prom
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since kindergarten.
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Uh, yes.
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You relented at age 12
70
00:03:22,660 --> 00:03:24,746
when he pulled you
out of a house fire.
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00:03:24,829 --> 00:03:26,789
Which you later
found out he started.
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00:03:26,873 --> 00:03:28,875
You should have seen
the look on your face.
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00:03:28,958 --> 00:03:30,168
In fact, here it is.
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Now, back to your teens.
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00:03:33,630 --> 00:03:35,173
Sorry I'm late, Lisa.
76
00:03:35,256 --> 00:03:37,967
I was at the gym,
totally gunning my lats.
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Just gunning them.
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(grunts)
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00:03:41,262 --> 00:03:42,472
Oh, man.
80
00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:45,475
The deposit on this tux
was 200 Reagans.
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00:03:46,935 --> 00:03:48,019
Hey, everybody.
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00:03:48,102 --> 00:03:50,688
Bart, you're lookin'
crook-ed.
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00:03:50,772 --> 00:03:52,815
Hey, Jenda, how 'bout
some forehead?
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Oh...
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00:03:54,609 --> 00:03:56,194
That was jagged.
86
00:03:56,277 --> 00:03:57,612
Hmph, when I was a kid
87
00:03:57,695 --> 00:04:00,031
we didn't show our affection
by head-butting.
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00:04:00,114 --> 00:04:03,701
Oh, Marge...
89
00:04:03,785 --> 00:04:05,912
Ooh! Oh!
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00:04:05,995 --> 00:04:07,622
Oh, right.
91
00:04:07,705 --> 00:04:08,456
Separated.
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00:04:08,539 --> 00:04:12,543
♪ Take on me ♪
93
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Ach! Who knew that
bio-engineered food
94
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would to lead to smart puke?
95
00:04:19,342 --> 00:04:22,428
Oh, you think you're
better than me, eh, puke?
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00:04:22,512 --> 00:04:24,931
♪ Gone ♪
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♪ In a day ♪
98
00:04:28,935 --> 00:04:30,979
So, Nelson, who did you
end up bringing tonight?
99
00:04:31,062 --> 00:04:32,730
Sherri or Terri?
100
00:04:32,814 --> 00:04:34,857
Uh, it didn't seem fair
to choose.
101
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Haw-haw.
102
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(clears throat):
Welcome, seniors
103
00:04:40,154 --> 00:04:42,532
and sexually precocious
underclassmen.
104
00:04:42,615 --> 00:04:43,700
I'd like to say good-bye
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00:04:43,783 --> 00:04:45,702
to those who are going off
to college,
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00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:47,578
or to fight in Gulf War Five:
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"Operation Find
Our President's Head."
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(chanting): USA.
Find the head.
109
00:04:53,167 --> 00:04:56,087
USA. Find the head.
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And now, here's
Assistant Principal Kearney.
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Okay, I want a nice, clean prom.
112
00:05:01,384 --> 00:05:07,515
That means no booze, kick,
puff, doze, maxx, stim or turb.
113
00:05:07,598 --> 00:05:09,642
Remember, "Stim Kills."
114
00:05:09,726 --> 00:05:12,061
It's what turned
Superintendent Chalmers
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into a vegetable.
116
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Skinner. Skinner. Skinner.
117
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Skinner. Skinner.
Skinner.
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I can use
the potty now.
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Mm...
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(psychedelic music plays)
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(evil growling)
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(cries)
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Your brother is so hot.
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Stop telling me that.
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Oh, sorry, Lisa.
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Sink activate.
127
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I love your dress.
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Soap activate.
129
00:05:50,641 --> 00:05:53,019
Bart tells me
you got into Yale.
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Sink terminate.
131
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Yeah, even though
McDonald's owns Yale now,
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it's still a great school.
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And I could never
afford to go there
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if I hadn't won
the Montgomery
Burns Scholarship.
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00:06:02,403 --> 00:06:04,405
Oh, yeah, that's the thing
he had to do
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as punishment
for stealing Christmas.
137
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Yeah.
I miss Christmas.
138
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I don't.
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( "True" by Spandau
Ballet plays)
140
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(sighing)
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♪ I know this much is true ♪
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So, any plans
after graduation?
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Travel.
144
00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:24,592
Do you need a traveling
companion, perchance?
145
00:06:24,675 --> 00:06:26,135
Travel canceled.
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(tires screech)
147
00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:32,683
Whoa, look out!
148
00:06:32,767 --> 00:06:35,770
Bart, are you sure about
this limo driver you hired?
149
00:06:35,853 --> 00:06:37,271
(screeching)
150
00:06:37,355 --> 00:06:40,441
I can fly. I can fly.
151
00:06:40,525 --> 00:06:42,568
Just kidding,
I know I can't fly.
152
00:06:42,652 --> 00:06:43,903
I can glide, though.
153
00:06:43,986 --> 00:06:45,071
Whoa...!
154
00:06:54,622 --> 00:06:55,706
(moaning)
155
00:06:57,625 --> 00:07:00,711
Jenda, I think we're ready
to go all the way.
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00:07:00,795 --> 00:07:01,838
But I'm a little nervous.
157
00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:03,714
Bart, don't be
nervous.
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00:07:03,798 --> 00:07:04,549
Sex on prom night
159
00:07:04,632 --> 00:07:06,968
is as American
as our 51st state:
160
00:07:07,051 --> 00:07:08,302
Saudi-Israelia.
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00:07:08,386 --> 00:07:10,805
Jenda, that's not
what I meant.
162
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I love you.
163
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Will you marry me?
164
00:07:13,891 --> 00:07:14,976
(gasps)
165
00:07:15,059 --> 00:07:17,395
That's really sweet...
166
00:07:17,478 --> 00:07:19,647
but marriage is
a three-year commitment.
167
00:07:19,730 --> 00:07:21,524
I mean, do you even know
168
00:07:21,607 --> 00:07:22,942
what you're gonna do
with your life?
169
00:07:23,025 --> 00:07:24,610
I've got it
all figured out.
170
00:07:24,694 --> 00:07:27,321
You can waitress
while I learn to cut meat.
171
00:07:27,405 --> 00:07:28,364
We'll live in a trailer,
172
00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:30,199
but to avoid
paying for parking,
173
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I'll drive
while you sleep.
174
00:07:32,368 --> 00:07:34,328
We'll never, ever stop.
175
00:07:34,412 --> 00:07:35,705
Bart, I hate to say this,
176
00:07:35,788 --> 00:07:37,373
but I think
I outgrew you.
177
00:07:37,457 --> 00:07:39,250
-When?
-Just this minute.
178
00:07:42,753 --> 00:07:45,423
Okay, love birds.
Break it up.
179
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Hey, this one's alone.
180
00:07:47,967 --> 00:07:49,343
What a loser.
181
00:07:49,427 --> 00:07:50,303
(sniffles)
182
00:07:50,386 --> 00:07:51,304
Aw...
183
00:07:51,387 --> 00:07:54,140
Here, you want
some chicken?
184
00:07:54,223 --> 00:07:56,058
Just grab it
with your hands, go ahead.
185
00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,268
We're not fancy here.
186
00:08:06,360 --> 00:08:07,528
I'm tired of this.
187
00:08:07,612 --> 00:08:09,489
I want to look
at a different future.
188
00:08:21,834 --> 00:08:22,752
Meh.
189
00:08:24,086 --> 00:08:26,297
So that's how
Jenda dumped me.
190
00:08:26,380 --> 00:08:29,175
Son, sometimes people
just grow apart,
191
00:08:29,258 --> 00:08:30,760
like me and your mom.
192
00:08:30,843 --> 00:08:31,761
No, Mom dumped you
193
00:08:31,844 --> 00:08:33,262
'cause you blew
all our money
194
00:08:33,346 --> 00:08:34,472
on this underwater house.
195
00:08:36,390 --> 00:08:39,268
She'll realize
she was a fool, when...
196
00:08:39,352 --> 00:08:41,521
Hey! Come back
with my patio furniture!
197
00:08:43,147 --> 00:08:44,482
Stupid flounders.
198
00:08:44,565 --> 00:08:46,317
Hey, I've got a great idea.
199
00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:48,486
We'll find
some new lady friends.
200
00:08:48,569 --> 00:08:51,030
Come on, boy,
we're hitting the town.
201
00:08:54,242 --> 00:08:55,743
After decompressing,
of course.
202
00:08:55,826 --> 00:08:57,203
(air hisses)
203
00:08:57,286 --> 00:08:59,455
(clock ticking)
204
00:09:02,208 --> 00:09:04,877
So... what do you do
to kill time in here?
205
00:09:04,961 --> 00:09:08,214
There's a DVD player,
but it doesn't work.
206
00:09:08,297 --> 00:09:12,009
(car whirring)
207
00:09:12,093 --> 00:09:14,762
(loudly):
Why'd you buy
the first hover car ever made?
208
00:09:14,845 --> 00:09:16,264
Didn't you know
it'd take time
209
00:09:16,347 --> 00:09:18,015
to work out the kinks?
210
00:09:18,099 --> 00:09:21,185
(laughs)
I know! It's a hover car!
211
00:09:21,269 --> 00:09:26,023
♪ What a beautiful world
this will be ♪
212
00:09:26,107 --> 00:09:30,736
♪ What a glorious time
to be free ♪
213
00:09:30,820 --> 00:09:33,573
All right! You guys
are my new best friends.
214
00:09:33,656 --> 00:09:35,950
You wish, loser!
215
00:09:36,033 --> 00:09:37,368
(Homer laughs)
216
00:09:51,215 --> 00:09:52,717
(screeching sound)
217
00:09:57,054 --> 00:09:58,598
Hey, Moe, hey, Moe-clone.
218
00:09:58,681 --> 00:09:59,599
Hiya Homer.
219
00:09:59,682 --> 00:10:00,891
Hi, Homer.
220
00:10:00,975 --> 00:10:02,852
Hey, hey, hey!
I don't pay you to socialize.
221
00:10:02,935 --> 00:10:04,937
Oh, right.
You're the
people person.
222
00:10:05,021 --> 00:10:07,064
Watch it with
the attitude, mister.
223
00:10:07,148 --> 00:10:08,608
You came
from my back fat!
224
00:10:08,691 --> 00:10:11,402
Boy, I think I see
225
00:10:11,485 --> 00:10:13,738
my two favorite letters
of the alphabet:
226
00:10:13,821 --> 00:10:17,700
E-Z.
227
00:10:17,783 --> 00:10:19,160
-Mm-mm-hmm...
-(glass breaks)
228
00:10:19,243 --> 00:10:20,036
You moron!
229
00:10:20,119 --> 00:10:22,663
Why did I ever think
I needed a clone?
230
00:10:22,747 --> 00:10:25,166
Hey, I'm not the clone,
you're the clone!
231
00:10:25,249 --> 00:10:27,209
Oh, please, not this again.
232
00:10:27,293 --> 00:10:29,295
-Hey, hey.
-(giggles)
233
00:10:29,378 --> 00:10:32,214
Son, say hello to Edna.
234
00:10:33,674 --> 00:10:34,717
(gasps)
235
00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:37,678
Dad, that's
my fourth grade teacher!
236
00:10:37,762 --> 00:10:38,679
Oopsy.
237
00:10:38,763 --> 00:10:42,725
Hi, Mrs. K.
This is sure weird, huh?
238
00:10:42,808 --> 00:10:44,727
Want it to get weirder?
239
00:10:44,810 --> 00:10:47,563
Uh, I... don't think so.
240
00:10:47,647 --> 00:10:48,564
Good call, Bart.
241
00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:49,815
We can both do better.
242
00:10:49,899 --> 00:10:50,691
(sighs)
243
00:10:50,775 --> 00:10:51,567
I wish I could talk
244
00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:53,694
to my fourth-grade self
just once.
245
00:10:53,778 --> 00:10:56,697
I'd say "Work hard,
don't be such a screw up."
246
00:10:56,781 --> 00:10:58,616
This time is so precious.
247
00:10:58,699 --> 00:10:59,825
Don't waste it.
248
00:10:59,909 --> 00:11:01,577
Bart, maybe you should
listen to this.
249
00:11:01,661 --> 00:11:05,414
Oh! Now I have to start over.
250
00:11:06,374 --> 00:11:09,001
("Take On Me" by A-ha Plays)
251
00:11:11,003 --> 00:11:13,381
Is that robot
break-dancing?
252
00:11:13,464 --> 00:11:15,800
No. He activated
his self-destruct mechanism.
253
00:11:18,052 --> 00:11:20,137
Love can really be painful.
254
00:11:20,221 --> 00:11:21,722
Tell me about it.
255
00:11:21,806 --> 00:11:22,807
I broke up
with Milhouse.
256
00:11:22,890 --> 00:11:23,808
How'd he take it?
257
00:11:23,891 --> 00:11:24,809
Um...
258
00:11:24,892 --> 00:11:25,851
(yelling)
259
00:11:27,019 --> 00:11:29,480
What Lisa's problem?
260
00:11:29,563 --> 00:11:32,942
Milhouse mother say
Milhouse handsome!
261
00:11:34,860 --> 00:11:35,903
(yells)
262
00:11:35,986 --> 00:11:37,071
(sighs)
263
00:11:37,154 --> 00:11:38,322
I guess everyone
in this family
264
00:11:38,406 --> 00:11:40,157
is doomed
to wind up alone.
265
00:11:40,241 --> 00:11:42,368
Look, if you want Jenda
to take you back
266
00:11:42,451 --> 00:11:43,703
you should show
some initiative;
267
00:11:43,786 --> 00:11:45,037
get a job.
268
00:11:45,121 --> 00:11:46,622
A career? No problem.
269
00:11:46,706 --> 00:11:48,124
I speak
three languages.
270
00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:50,209
Armpit noises
are not a language.
271
00:11:50,292 --> 00:11:52,128
Oh, yeah?
272
00:11:52,211 --> 00:11:53,671
(squeaky arm pit sounds)
273
00:11:53,754 --> 00:11:57,258
Look, my point is,
show Jenda you want
to be successful
274
00:11:57,341 --> 00:11:59,051
and she might
take you back.
275
00:11:59,135 --> 00:12:00,386
It's never too
late for love.
276
00:12:00,469 --> 00:12:03,639
MARGE:
Oh, I am so glad
you think so.
277
00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:06,142
Kids, I want you to know
278
00:12:06,225 --> 00:12:08,519
I've started
seeing someone.
279
00:12:08,602 --> 00:12:11,480
He's from Springfield.
I think you know him.
280
00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:12,648
Hey, hey!
281
00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:15,109
Krusty the Clown
is dating your mom!
282
00:12:15,192 --> 00:12:16,360
(goofy laugh)
283
00:12:16,444 --> 00:12:18,404
(screams)
284
00:12:18,487 --> 00:12:20,239
When Jenda hears
about my great new career,
285
00:12:20,322 --> 00:12:22,742
she'll definitely take me back.
286
00:12:25,202 --> 00:12:26,829
(buzzing)
287
00:12:30,166 --> 00:12:32,585
You missed a spot.
288
00:12:32,668 --> 00:12:33,419
Do it again!
289
00:12:33,502 --> 00:12:34,336
Yes, Mr. Gheet.
290
00:12:34,420 --> 00:12:37,006
I'm Anoop,
you racist cracker!
291
00:12:37,089 --> 00:12:38,090
(grunts)
292
00:12:38,174 --> 00:12:39,925
Bart, I need you
to make a delivery
293
00:12:40,009 --> 00:12:41,177
to an elderly shut-in.
294
00:12:41,260 --> 00:12:42,303
And to get there,
295
00:12:42,386 --> 00:12:45,431
you must go through
the forbidden zone.
296
00:12:45,514 --> 00:12:49,101
Which one? Radioactive,
smallpox, eternal midnight...
297
00:12:49,185 --> 00:12:52,354
No, no. The one
with the uni-clams.
298
00:12:55,524 --> 00:12:57,234
(clams shrieking)
299
00:12:57,318 --> 00:12:58,152
No!
300
00:13:00,446 --> 00:13:01,447
Ow!
301
00:13:03,407 --> 00:13:04,992
(gasps)
302
00:13:09,872 --> 00:13:12,333
(muffled grunting)
303
00:13:12,416 --> 00:13:13,918
Oh, I get it.
304
00:13:14,001 --> 00:13:15,836
You can't tip me because
your hands are tied.
305
00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:18,756
My Dad pulls that scam
all the time.
306
00:13:18,839 --> 00:13:21,383
Don't move,
teenage Bart.
307
00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:25,596
I've got you covered
with my phaser-slash-cell phone.
308
00:13:25,679 --> 00:13:27,973
(plays "The Entertainer")
309
00:13:28,057 --> 00:13:30,726
Dude, this is totally
not the time to call me.
310
00:13:30,810 --> 00:13:31,727
I don't know.
311
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:33,145
Some kind of pasta.
312
00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:35,606
Look, just get me
what you're having, all right?
313
00:13:35,689 --> 00:13:37,024
Ew, not that.
314
00:13:38,359 --> 00:13:41,654
What soups do they have...?
315
00:13:44,198 --> 00:13:47,409
Oh, blessed urchin!
How can I reward you?
316
00:13:47,493 --> 00:13:49,662
Uh... with the diamond?
317
00:13:49,745 --> 00:13:50,746
No, sorry.
318
00:13:50,830 --> 00:13:52,957
My diamonds are going
to be retro-morphed into coal...
319
00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:55,459
the most valuable substance
on Earth.
320
00:13:55,543 --> 00:13:57,419
I know. I'll send you to Yale
321
00:13:57,503 --> 00:13:59,213
with the Monty Burns
Scholarship.
322
00:13:59,296 --> 00:14:01,048
I can't take
your scholarship!
323
00:14:01,131 --> 00:14:02,299
It's going
to my sister.
324
00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:03,342
It would break
her heart.
325
00:14:03,425 --> 00:14:05,886
Don't be so quick to say no.
326
00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:07,221
The ladies love
an ivy-leaguer...
327
00:14:07,304 --> 00:14:08,514
They do?
328
00:14:08,597 --> 00:14:09,849
Oh, yeah!
329
00:14:09,932 --> 00:14:12,309
Once I home-invaded
this Princeton dude,
330
00:14:12,393 --> 00:14:15,521
and he was like totally married.
331
00:14:15,604 --> 00:14:16,772
Well, I guess
332
00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:19,024
an intensive four-year bachelor
of arts program
333
00:14:19,108 --> 00:14:20,734
is the easiest way
to get Jenda back.
334
00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:23,279
Hello, Smithers.
Nice of you to drop by...
335
00:14:23,362 --> 00:14:24,738
after my life was saved.
336
00:14:24,822 --> 00:14:26,448
Sir, you knew
I was on a date.
337
00:14:26,532 --> 00:14:27,741
Mr. Smithers?
338
00:14:27,825 --> 00:14:30,828
I thought you were...
you know... uh...
339
00:14:30,911 --> 00:14:32,830
No, I'm straight.
340
00:14:32,913 --> 00:14:34,331
As long as I take
these injections
341
00:14:34,415 --> 00:14:36,083
every ten minutes.
342
00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:38,794
I love boobies!
343
00:14:38,878 --> 00:14:39,670
It's so great
344
00:14:39,753 --> 00:14:41,672
that Yale has finally
forbidden men
345
00:14:41,755 --> 00:14:43,048
from taking science.
346
00:14:43,132 --> 00:14:45,593
Now let's see,
should I major in Femistry
347
00:14:45,676 --> 00:14:47,094
or Galgebra?
348
00:14:47,177 --> 00:14:48,178
Listen, Lis,
349
00:14:48,262 --> 00:14:50,222
I've gotta tell you
something.
350
00:14:50,306 --> 00:14:51,223
I'm going to Yale.
351
00:14:51,307 --> 00:14:54,685
What? I don't want to go
to the same college as you.
352
00:14:54,768 --> 00:14:57,229
Then I've got some great news!
You're not going to Yale!
353
00:14:57,313 --> 00:14:59,523
(screams)
354
00:15:01,775 --> 00:15:03,611
Hey, I didn't do anything!
355
00:15:03,694 --> 00:15:04,612
Yet.
356
00:15:06,155 --> 00:15:08,032
You've wrecked my life!
357
00:15:08,115 --> 00:15:11,118
You're gonna wreck
my life!
358
00:15:16,749 --> 00:15:18,667
Hey, Marge, why are
you with Krusty?
359
00:15:18,751 --> 00:15:20,753
These kids are
too old for clowns.
360
00:15:20,836 --> 00:15:24,715
Actually, Homer,
I'm... into your lady.
361
00:15:24,798 --> 00:15:27,468
Hey, man, she's not
my lady anymore.
362
00:15:27,551 --> 00:15:29,595
We split up,
it's all cool,
363
00:15:29,678 --> 00:15:31,597
I... I'll kill you!
364
00:15:33,682 --> 00:15:35,643
Once they destroy
each other...
365
00:15:35,726 --> 00:15:37,394
Then we make our move.
366
00:15:37,478 --> 00:15:40,105
Yes, we make our move.
367
00:15:40,189 --> 00:15:43,067
What? A spider got
into the cloning machine.
368
00:15:43,150 --> 00:15:44,360
Attention, everyone.
369
00:15:44,443 --> 00:15:46,487
Please welcome
our valedictorian,
370
00:15:46,570 --> 00:15:47,613
Lisa Simpson.
371
00:15:47,696 --> 00:15:50,074
She will be
attending Yale...
372
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:55,955
I mean, Hot Dog on a Stick
Management Camp.
373
00:15:57,623 --> 00:15:58,874
That's odd.
374
00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:01,377
You get into Yale
and Lisa can't go anymore?
375
00:16:01,460 --> 00:16:03,545
Hey, what can I say.
I love learning.
376
00:16:03,629 --> 00:16:05,255
SKINNER:
Bartholomew Simpson!
377
00:16:05,339 --> 00:16:06,507
What?
378
00:16:06,590 --> 00:16:08,550
Come and get your diploma.
379
00:16:08,634 --> 00:16:10,427
Why don't you mail it
to your butt?
380
00:16:10,511 --> 00:16:14,264
Bart, now that you've graduated
I can finally say this:
381
00:16:14,348 --> 00:16:16,266
you really press my cider.
382
00:16:16,350 --> 00:16:18,602
(all gasping)
383
00:16:21,021 --> 00:16:22,147
Yo, Bart,
384
00:16:22,231 --> 00:16:24,441
good to see you're
back with Jenda.
385
00:16:24,525 --> 00:16:25,234
Hey, Nelson.
386
00:16:25,317 --> 00:16:27,111
What's up
with your girlfriends?
387
00:16:27,194 --> 00:16:29,196
They each had twins.
388
00:16:29,279 --> 00:16:30,531
(babies grunting)
389
00:16:30,614 --> 00:16:32,074
Listen, girls... um,
390
00:16:32,157 --> 00:16:34,410
I'm going out
for a pack of cigarettes.
391
00:16:34,493 --> 00:16:37,621
Isn't that what your father
said the day he left you?
392
00:16:37,705 --> 00:16:40,916
Yeah. I never understood
why he did it...
393
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:41,750
till now.
394
00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:44,253
I'm coming, Papa!
395
00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:47,840
(gurgling):
Haw haw!
396
00:16:47,923 --> 00:16:50,050
(sobbing)
397
00:16:50,134 --> 00:16:53,637
Lisa had no right
to break up with me.
398
00:16:53,721 --> 00:16:59,351
I'm not the first guy to get a
nosebleed during a slow dance.
399
00:16:59,435 --> 00:17:00,686
I'd better go talk to him.
400
00:17:00,769 --> 00:17:03,564
Well, don't take too long.
401
00:17:03,647 --> 00:17:07,234
I think this might be
our special night.
402
00:17:08,777 --> 00:17:10,529
Why did Lisa dump me?
403
00:17:10,612 --> 00:17:13,032
Is it because of
my small calves?
404
00:17:13,115 --> 00:17:15,325
They're the hardest
place to add mass!
405
00:17:15,409 --> 00:17:16,535
Cheer up, Milhouse.
406
00:17:16,618 --> 00:17:18,829
You got your whole
life ahead of you.
407
00:17:18,912 --> 00:17:19,830
Oh, no!
408
00:17:19,913 --> 00:17:21,874
(loud sobs)
409
00:17:21,957 --> 00:17:25,502
Hey, I remember when you were
a nerdy little fourth-grader.
410
00:17:25,586 --> 00:17:28,464
And now you're an emotionally
crippled mini-Hulk.
411
00:17:28,547 --> 00:17:30,174
What girl wouldn't
want that?
412
00:17:30,257 --> 00:17:31,967
Do you think Lisa
might see that
413
00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:34,428
-now that she's got
nothing else?
-I guess so.
414
00:17:34,511 --> 00:17:35,387
Boo-yeah!
415
00:17:35,471 --> 00:17:38,557
Time to strike
while the iron is sad!
416
00:17:40,142 --> 00:17:41,894
All right.
417
00:17:41,977 --> 00:17:45,272
Three hours
to blast my quads.
418
00:17:45,355 --> 00:17:48,859
(chanting):
Li-sa, Li-sa, Li-sa...
419
00:17:51,737 --> 00:17:53,572
Bart, what's wrong?
420
00:17:53,655 --> 00:17:54,990
You seem distracted.
421
00:17:55,074 --> 00:17:57,659
Oh, I was just thinking
about Milhouse and Lisa.
422
00:17:57,743 --> 00:18:00,662
Mm-hmm. What are you
thinking about now?
423
00:18:02,539 --> 00:18:04,291
Hey, that rundown old house
424
00:18:04,374 --> 00:18:06,376
looks familiar.
425
00:18:06,460 --> 00:18:08,879
That's where Doc Frink
used to live.
426
00:18:08,962 --> 00:18:09,713
(sighs)
427
00:18:09,797 --> 00:18:12,091
I never had this problem
with Todd Flanders.
428
00:18:19,098 --> 00:18:21,475
This machine lets us
look into the future.
429
00:18:21,558 --> 00:18:23,352
Wouldn't that be romantic?
430
00:18:23,435 --> 00:18:25,229
I'll tell you
what would be romantic.
431
00:18:25,312 --> 00:18:28,023
Making love
for the first time.
432
00:18:28,107 --> 00:18:31,318
Totally. Right after I fiddle
with these dials and levers.
433
00:18:31,401 --> 00:18:33,570
(electronic tones)
434
00:18:37,241 --> 00:18:40,452
You know, I was thinking
of taking a poetry class
435
00:18:40,536 --> 00:18:42,162
at the community college.
436
00:18:42,246 --> 00:18:43,163
Forget it.
437
00:18:43,247 --> 00:18:47,751
I had to sell all my marrow
to pay the light bill.
438
00:18:47,835 --> 00:18:50,838
I didn't have much marrow.
439
00:18:50,921 --> 00:18:52,714
I can't let that happen.
440
00:18:52,798 --> 00:18:53,549
I got to go.
441
00:18:53,632 --> 00:18:55,843
Listen, Bart,
if you leave me now,
442
00:18:55,926 --> 00:18:58,595
I can guarantee one thing
about your future--
443
00:18:58,679 --> 00:18:59,805
I won't be in it.
444
00:19:01,890 --> 00:19:04,977
Not going to Yale isn't
the end of the world.
445
00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:07,521
Yeah, I'm starting
to see that.
446
00:19:07,604 --> 00:19:09,815
No, I mean, you're screwed.
447
00:19:09,898 --> 00:19:12,359
Your only hope is
to clutch at straws.
448
00:19:12,442 --> 00:19:15,028
Straws who've always loved you.
449
00:19:15,112 --> 00:19:16,071
Really?
450
00:19:16,155 --> 00:19:17,656
Really.
451
00:19:17,739 --> 00:19:19,366
Ca-can I kiss you?
452
00:19:19,449 --> 00:19:22,035
Um, have you eaten onions
lately?
453
00:19:22,119 --> 00:19:24,037
No. And it's really hard
454
00:19:24,121 --> 00:19:26,707
'cause I'm on
an all-onion diet.
455
00:19:27,875 --> 00:19:30,377
Uh... well... okay.
456
00:19:30,460 --> 00:19:33,297
I guess this is my destiny.
457
00:19:36,258 --> 00:19:37,801
What are you doing?
458
00:19:37,885 --> 00:19:39,720
Keeping Lisa from
destroying her life.
459
00:19:39,803 --> 00:19:42,014
Come on, let her destroy it.
460
00:19:46,518 --> 00:19:49,438
(groaning)
461
00:19:49,521 --> 00:19:52,858
Lenny, Carl,
can you pull me out?
462
00:19:52,941 --> 00:19:54,735
Sorry, we're ghosts now.
463
00:19:54,818 --> 00:19:56,737
Our spirits live
in those two trees.
464
00:19:56,820 --> 00:19:57,988
Or, maybe we're alive
465
00:19:58,071 --> 00:20:00,157
and we just feel like
jerkin' you around.
466
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:01,783
Or maybe
we're one of each.
467
00:20:01,867 --> 00:20:02,826
(both laughing)
468
00:20:02,910 --> 00:20:04,328
(groans)
469
00:20:05,537 --> 00:20:07,915
Look, I'm not taking
the scholarship.
470
00:20:07,998 --> 00:20:09,917
You're the one
who deserves to go to Yale.
471
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:12,252
Oh that's so noble.
472
00:20:12,336 --> 00:20:13,170
But what about Jenda?
473
00:20:13,253 --> 00:20:17,216
Hey, I'm waiting till I find
a girl who likes me for me.
474
00:20:17,299 --> 00:20:18,675
And you will.
475
00:20:18,759 --> 00:20:20,719
At the age of 83.
476
00:20:20,802 --> 00:20:22,512
You die one minute later.
477
00:20:22,596 --> 00:20:24,890
And my brain is put in a...
478
00:20:24,973 --> 00:20:25,933
Pauper's grave.
479
00:20:26,016 --> 00:20:27,351
Well, Bart,
I really appreciate
480
00:20:27,434 --> 00:20:28,936
what you're going
to do for me.
481
00:20:30,062 --> 00:20:32,731
But what happens
to our parents?
482
00:20:35,525 --> 00:20:38,028
Marge, I thought
you'd never take me back
483
00:20:38,111 --> 00:20:39,780
after what I did to Krusty.
484
00:20:39,863 --> 00:20:41,698
You mean get
beaten up by him?
485
00:20:41,782 --> 00:20:43,158
Exactly.
486
00:20:43,242 --> 00:20:47,120
And I'll admit, it is kind
of romantic under the sea.
487
00:20:47,204 --> 00:20:49,665
You don't know the half of it.
488
00:20:49,748 --> 00:20:50,916
(chuckles)
489
00:20:52,626 --> 00:20:55,712
("Sea of Love" playing)
490
00:20:55,796 --> 00:21:02,844
♪ Come with me my love
to the sea ♪
491
00:21:03,804 --> 00:21:07,015
♪ The sea of love ♪
492
00:21:07,099 --> 00:21:14,106
♪ I want to tell you
how much I love you... ♪
493
00:21:15,691 --> 00:21:16,817
Oh, this sucks.
494
00:21:16,900 --> 00:21:18,485
I want to see
Vice President Cletus.
495
00:21:18,568 --> 00:21:23,240
You want me to attend the
funeral of the Sultan of Brunei?
496
00:21:23,323 --> 00:21:26,618
Well, I would consider it
my honor.
497
00:21:26,702 --> 00:21:30,580
Hey, Brandine,
pack my evenin' britches.
498
00:21:30,664 --> 00:21:33,333
We's goin' to Brunei.
499
00:21:51,059 --> 00:21:51,893
Shh.
500
00:21:52,728 --> 00:21:54,730
Captioned by VISUAL DATA
501
00:21:55,063 --> 00:21:57,065
Enhanced by Fotokem