1 00:00:17,001 --> 00:00:19,468 Guten Abend, Herr Horatio. 2 00:00:19,545 --> 00:00:21,479 Gib mir die Karte. 3 00:00:39,523 --> 00:00:41,018 Springfield, eh? 4 00:00:41,042 --> 00:00:42,853 Then that's where I'm going treasure hunting. 5 00:00:42,877 --> 00:00:45,786 You mean we're going treasure hunting. 6 00:00:47,456 --> 00:00:50,861 We'll find that sunken ship within the week. 7 00:00:51,839 --> 00:00:53,961 - Grid 274 by 319. - _ 8 00:00:54,038 --> 00:00:56,005 Depth 60 meters. Sounding. 9 00:00:57,416 --> 00:00:58,507 Nothing. 10 00:00:58,584 --> 00:01:00,393 Proceed to next reading. 11 00:01:05,382 --> 00:01:07,711 Grid 274 by 320. 12 00:01:07,735 --> 00:01:09,902 Depth 60 meters. Sounding. 13 00:01:12,071 --> 00:01:14,523 - Nothing. - Yarr. 14 00:01:34,620 --> 00:01:37,241 Captain, the long-range Doppler shows a squall 15 00:01:37,265 --> 00:01:40,215 coming out of the nor'east. 16 00:01:40,292 --> 00:01:44,887 Hmm. We'd best head back to wait it out. 17 00:01:45,578 --> 00:01:48,752 Let me guess, you didn't find any treasure today. 18 00:01:49,383 --> 00:01:50,726 Did you talk to the doctor 19 00:01:50,803 --> 00:01:52,987 about going up on your dose? 20 00:01:55,641 --> 00:01:58,067 The storm stirred up the seafloor. 21 00:01:58,143 --> 00:02:01,236 We'll have to resound everything south of the break. 22 00:02:05,626 --> 00:02:07,626 Grid 274 by six. 23 00:02:07,703 --> 00:02:09,870 Depth 30 meters. Sounding. 24 00:02:11,156 --> 00:02:12,189 Nothing. 25 00:02:14,660 --> 00:02:16,543 I made us a roast for dinner, 26 00:02:16,620 --> 00:02:19,213 then threw it away. 27 00:02:19,331 --> 00:02:23,225 I'm sorry I never gave you any children. 28 00:02:25,888 --> 00:02:28,055 Grid 291 by 502. 29 00:02:28,132 --> 00:02:30,316 Depth 70 meters. Sounding. 30 00:02:33,527 --> 00:02:34,579 Arr. 31 00:02:34,614 --> 00:02:35,938 A second ping. 32 00:02:36,569 --> 00:02:38,273 A second ping! 33 00:02:38,350 --> 00:02:40,804 I've waited half a lifetime to say this. 34 00:02:40,828 --> 00:02:42,995 Divers, gear up! 35 00:02:53,007 --> 00:02:54,173 We found it. 36 00:02:54,250 --> 00:02:56,320 We finally found it, boys! 37 00:02:56,344 --> 00:02:58,752 I didn't waste my life! 38 00:03:07,045 --> 00:03:08,470 Yarr. 39 00:03:08,547 --> 00:03:12,024 I see you've come to admire our plunder. 40 00:03:12,101 --> 00:03:15,644 Er, technically that plunder belongs to the town. 41 00:03:15,721 --> 00:03:19,009 It was discovered in Springfield city limits. 42 00:03:19,033 --> 00:03:22,775 No, we found the gold in unincorporated waters! 43 00:03:22,810 --> 00:03:24,987 The survey says it's ours! 44 00:03:25,063 --> 00:03:27,351 Sorry, but the town redrew the boundaries... 45 00:03:27,375 --> 00:03:28,949 yesterday. 46 00:03:29,026 --> 00:03:32,161 But we worked in secret for 40 years. 47 00:03:32,237 --> 00:03:35,831 I pretended to be a flimsy, one-note character. 48 00:03:35,908 --> 00:03:38,167 How did you know? 49 00:03:38,891 --> 00:03:42,004 I should have been your treasure. 50 00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:46,133 Yarr... 51 00:03:46,210 --> 00:03:49,636 _ 52 00:03:49,713 --> 00:03:52,627 All right, people. This town's got doubloons. 53 00:03:52,662 --> 00:03:53,710 Who's got ideas? 54 00:03:53,734 --> 00:03:56,402 If I don't hear anything good, we're building another stadium, 55 00:03:56,479 --> 00:03:58,737 and no team will come here. 56 00:03:58,814 --> 00:04:00,689 How about a new town clock where, every hour, 57 00:04:00,766 --> 00:04:02,408 Jesus forgives the Devil? 58 00:04:02,485 --> 00:04:05,694 A new zoo with more attractive animals. 59 00:04:05,771 --> 00:04:07,913 What about those death panels we were promised? 60 00:04:07,990 --> 00:04:10,727 Shouting out something before I know what I'm gonna say. 61 00:04:10,751 --> 00:04:14,369 Rock & Roll Hall of Fame with no Pearl Jam! 62 00:04:14,446 --> 00:04:16,733 Uh, excuse me. I have an idea. 63 00:04:16,757 --> 00:04:19,166 Now, Marge, if you'll check your program, 64 00:04:19,243 --> 00:04:22,044 nagging objections are at the end. 65 00:04:22,120 --> 00:04:24,096 _ 66 00:04:26,278 --> 00:04:27,398 Look at the world. 67 00:04:27,498 --> 00:04:30,385 Our children's future is challenging and uncertain. 68 00:04:30,462 --> 00:04:33,388 This windfall is our last, best hope 69 00:04:33,465 --> 00:04:35,085 to give our kids the tools they'll need 70 00:04:35,109 --> 00:04:36,775 to face that future. 71 00:04:37,387 --> 00:04:39,756 To succeed, our kids must have an education 72 00:04:39,780 --> 00:04:42,856 based on science, technology, 73 00:04:42,933 --> 00:04:45,901 engineering and math. 74 00:04:46,871 --> 00:04:47,979 STEM. 75 00:04:48,014 --> 00:04:50,072 All who find Marge's idea tiresome, 76 00:04:50,148 --> 00:04:53,575 let out an exaggerated, sarcastic yawn. 77 00:04:56,872 --> 00:04:59,109 Okay, okay. I brought someone 78 00:04:59,133 --> 00:05:01,800 you will listen to about STEM education. 79 00:05:01,877 --> 00:05:06,305 Columbia recording artist John Legend. 80 00:05:06,382 --> 00:05:11,051 ♪ STEM, science, tech, engineering and math ♪ 81 00:05:11,128 --> 00:05:15,481 ♪ More than a trendy way to say computer class ♪ 82 00:05:15,558 --> 00:05:18,892 ♪ STEM, it's not just for dorks, dweebs and nerds ♪ 83 00:05:18,969 --> 00:05:22,466 ♪ It'll turn all your dumb kids to Zuckerbergs ♪ 84 00:05:22,490 --> 00:05:26,803 ♪ STEM, 'cause the future is written in code ♪ 85 00:05:26,827 --> 00:05:30,404 ♪ Make an app, get big cash from an IPO ♪ 86 00:05:30,480 --> 00:05:31,808 ♪ STEM ♪ 87 00:05:31,832 --> 00:05:37,127 ♪ Oh, STEM. ♪ 88 00:05:40,615 --> 00:05:42,925 Who could say no to a silky slow jam 89 00:05:43,001 --> 00:05:45,377 about the importance of technology-based learning? 90 00:05:45,453 --> 00:05:49,005 I'll never have kids because my nards were cooked by science. 91 00:05:49,082 --> 00:05:51,049 But if I could, I'd want 'em to learn 92 00:05:51,126 --> 00:05:53,885 about the science of why they don't exist. 93 00:05:53,962 --> 00:05:56,721 I'd just like to thank John Legend...'s wife 94 00:05:56,798 --> 00:05:59,057 Chrissy Teigen for bringing him here today. 95 00:05:59,134 --> 00:06:01,560 Turns out, there's nothing she loves more 96 00:06:01,636 --> 00:06:04,855 than doing personal favors for her Instagram followers. 97 00:06:04,931 --> 00:06:07,761 Well, Marge, you did call the picture I posted 98 00:06:07,785 --> 00:06:10,527 of my kids with ketchup on their faces "adorbs." 99 00:06:10,604 --> 00:06:13,697 It was. It was totes adorbs. 100 00:06:13,773 --> 00:06:16,074 Baby, we got to get going. We're gonna be late 101 00:06:16,151 --> 00:06:18,772 for the launch party for our couples' perfume. 102 00:06:18,796 --> 00:06:21,746 I'm talking to my online friend IRL. 103 00:06:21,823 --> 00:06:23,757 Go charge the kids' iPads. 104 00:06:29,497 --> 00:06:30,973 Come on, Springfield! 105 00:06:31,049 --> 00:06:33,787 Build your children the school of tomorrow. 106 00:06:36,876 --> 00:06:40,932 I did it. I gave our kids hope for the future. 107 00:06:41,009 --> 00:06:42,893 You have any songs about how I should be allowed 108 00:06:42,969 --> 00:06:44,798 to skip jury duty? 109 00:06:44,822 --> 00:06:48,565 ♪ How is it justice to impanel a man ♪ 110 00:06:48,642 --> 00:06:51,410 ♪ During March Madness? ♪ 111 00:06:56,025 --> 00:06:58,125 _ 112 00:06:58,526 --> 00:07:00,243 What are you gonna do with your forced retirement, sir? 113 00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:02,649 I'm intrigued by a local skydiving club 114 00:07:02,673 --> 00:07:05,173 who needs someone to sit in the office and answer phones. 115 00:07:05,250 --> 00:07:06,750 Yeah, well, who cares? 116 00:07:06,826 --> 00:07:09,678 I'll be taking an Ohio River cruise. 117 00:07:09,755 --> 00:07:11,963 Lot of widows on the Good River. 118 00:07:12,040 --> 00:07:14,466 Lot of widows. 119 00:07:15,579 --> 00:07:16,760 New school smell. 120 00:07:16,836 --> 00:07:19,165 Paperless classrooms, personal tablets, 121 00:07:19,189 --> 00:07:21,189 and uncrammable lockers. 122 00:07:23,885 --> 00:07:26,820 Aw. Man, this is embarrassing. 123 00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:32,868 Bart Simpson. 124 00:07:32,945 --> 00:07:36,780 Welcome. I'm Zane Furlong, this school's CEO: 125 00:07:36,856 --> 00:07:39,282 Collaborative Educational Outreacher. 126 00:07:39,359 --> 00:07:41,284 I'm gonna stop you right there, Skinner 2.0. 127 00:07:41,361 --> 00:07:43,211 It doesn't matter how you dress it up. 128 00:07:43,288 --> 00:07:44,996 All schools are kid prisons. 129 00:07:45,073 --> 00:07:48,124 Well, I'm putting you in solitary, 130 00:07:48,201 --> 00:07:50,669 where you'll learn geometry by shooting meteors. 131 00:07:50,745 --> 00:07:52,198 Shoot enough, 132 00:07:52,222 --> 00:07:55,140 and you'll unlock customizable skins. 133 00:07:56,894 --> 00:07:58,468 Skins? 134 00:07:58,545 --> 00:08:00,312 That's how boys play dress-up. 135 00:08:02,806 --> 00:08:04,015 Lisa Simpson. 136 00:08:04,092 --> 00:08:07,235 Our educational metric has identified you 137 00:08:07,312 --> 00:08:10,906 as a divergent multipathway assimilator. 138 00:08:10,983 --> 00:08:13,553 You mean, I'm in a gifted class? 139 00:08:13,577 --> 00:08:15,410 Ooh, we don't like that term. 140 00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:17,390 Everyone is gifted. 141 00:08:17,414 --> 00:08:19,081 I firmly believe that. 142 00:08:19,157 --> 00:08:21,199 Now go upstairs to the... 143 00:08:21,276 --> 00:08:22,751 gifted class. 144 00:08:25,163 --> 00:08:27,255 Finally, I feel seen. 145 00:08:27,332 --> 00:08:29,903 And for the first time, I'll be accepted by my peers 146 00:08:29,927 --> 00:08:31,218 with open arms. 147 00:08:34,264 --> 00:08:36,195 I'm home. 148 00:08:44,299 --> 00:08:45,849 Okay, gifted class. 149 00:08:45,925 --> 00:08:47,087 Recess is over. 150 00:08:47,111 --> 00:08:48,944 Aw! 151 00:08:49,021 --> 00:08:50,895 Now, this school is so advanced 152 00:08:50,972 --> 00:08:53,949 that every aspect of it is run by an algorithm. 153 00:08:54,026 --> 00:08:56,693 Who can give me an example of an algorithm? 154 00:08:58,013 --> 00:09:00,238 Oh! Like when you buy a new garbage can online 155 00:09:00,315 --> 00:09:03,533 and the rest of your life, you see ads for garbage cans. 156 00:09:03,610 --> 00:09:06,369 Or like when you watch a bunch of close-up magic videos 157 00:09:06,446 --> 00:09:08,942 on YouTube and get ads for a suicide hotline. 158 00:09:08,966 --> 00:09:10,582 Exactly. 159 00:09:10,658 --> 00:09:12,584 And because you liked this lesson, 160 00:09:12,660 --> 00:09:15,512 the algorithm thinks you might also enjoy... 161 00:09:21,961 --> 00:09:23,145 How was your first day 162 00:09:23,221 --> 00:09:25,814 at the new STEM school I founded? 163 00:09:25,891 --> 00:09:27,891 It was amazing. We did science, 164 00:09:27,967 --> 00:09:29,434 then we did computer science, 165 00:09:29,511 --> 00:09:32,132 and then we did cognitive computer science. 166 00:09:32,156 --> 00:09:34,105 Oh, what a surprise. Lisa likes school. 167 00:09:34,182 --> 00:09:37,137 All right, boy. What did you get suspended for today? 168 00:09:37,161 --> 00:09:38,493 Nothing. 169 00:09:40,330 --> 00:09:41,808 I like this school, too. 170 00:09:41,832 --> 00:09:43,615 Instead of teachers giving us letter grades, 171 00:09:43,691 --> 00:09:46,146 an algorithm gives us stars. 172 00:09:46,170 --> 00:09:48,787 Education is a game now, and I'm great at it. 173 00:09:48,863 --> 00:09:51,506 Look at all these skins I've already unlocked. 174 00:09:51,583 --> 00:09:53,083 Whoa. Oh, that guy. 175 00:09:53,817 --> 00:09:54,342 Noice. 176 00:09:54,419 --> 00:09:57,012 I even unlocked the "Skin Unlocking" badge. 177 00:09:57,089 --> 00:09:58,096 Whoo-hoo! 178 00:09:59,683 --> 00:10:00,883 _ 179 00:10:00,884 --> 00:10:03,496 Tell us, what do you do, Mr. Simpson? 180 00:10:03,520 --> 00:10:06,304 Ah, yes. I monitor the core temperature 181 00:10:06,381 --> 00:10:07,430 at the nuclear power plant. 182 00:10:07,507 --> 00:10:08,973 If it gets into the red, 183 00:10:09,050 --> 00:10:11,838 I tell my family first so they can leave town 184 00:10:11,862 --> 00:10:13,361 before the streets get too crowded. 185 00:10:13,438 --> 00:10:17,107 - Now, this is a great example... - Uh-huh. 186 00:10:17,183 --> 00:10:20,110 ...of the kind of job that will soon cease to exist. 187 00:10:20,186 --> 00:10:21,945 What the words now? 188 00:10:22,021 --> 00:10:23,321 Mr. Simpson's daily tasks 189 00:10:23,398 --> 00:10:25,685 can be more efficiently performed by robots. 190 00:10:25,709 --> 00:10:29,022 My guess is, his job will be obsolete in 18 months. 191 00:10:29,046 --> 00:10:31,287 What about them? How much time do their careers have? 192 00:10:31,364 --> 00:10:33,193 - I'm a librarian. - Five years. 193 00:10:33,217 --> 00:10:36,084 I just bought a New York City taxi medallion. 194 00:10:36,161 --> 00:10:37,502 Five years ago. 195 00:10:37,579 --> 00:10:40,555 I do social media for a cannabis delivery company. 196 00:10:40,632 --> 00:10:42,224 You'll be fine. 197 00:10:42,259 --> 00:10:45,205 But all these other jobs will soon be made obsolete 198 00:10:45,229 --> 00:10:47,303 by automation. 199 00:10:47,380 --> 00:10:48,730 Oh, no. The robots are coming! 200 00:10:48,807 --> 00:10:50,140 I've got to warn everyone! 201 00:10:52,427 --> 00:10:54,018 Stupid kids! 202 00:11:00,756 --> 00:11:02,911 I'm getting five stars in all my classes. 203 00:11:02,988 --> 00:11:06,081 I finally unlocked dreadlock sideburns. 204 00:11:06,158 --> 00:11:08,917 Someone's user name is moving up the leaderboard. 205 00:11:08,994 --> 00:11:11,035 Cowabunga. 206 00:11:11,112 --> 00:11:12,871 Now get back downstairs 207 00:11:12,923 --> 00:11:14,901 to prepare for the jobs of tomorrow. 208 00:11:14,925 --> 00:11:17,676 Whoo-hoo! It's a race to the bottom! 209 00:11:18,762 --> 00:11:21,263 Hmm? 210 00:11:22,174 --> 00:11:24,382 Hmm. 211 00:11:24,459 --> 00:11:27,177 Bart, I've never seen you so engaged in learning. 212 00:11:27,253 --> 00:11:29,345 It's awesome. We're seeing how many e-scooters 213 00:11:29,422 --> 00:11:30,847 we can collect around town, 214 00:11:30,924 --> 00:11:32,941 charge, then get back on the streets. 215 00:11:33,018 --> 00:11:35,800 Oh, I see. You're learning logic and spatial reasoning. 216 00:11:35,835 --> 00:11:38,688 All I know is, if I don't get ten scooters in under a minute, 217 00:11:38,765 --> 00:11:41,191 I won't unlock the Master Collector badge. 218 00:11:42,769 --> 00:11:44,119 Got it! 219 00:11:44,196 --> 00:11:46,329 Learning rules! 220 00:11:46,330 --> 00:11:48,395 _ 221 00:11:50,652 --> 00:11:53,273 Oh, you must be teaching the kids about nutrition 222 00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:55,630 and staying within a budget, right? 223 00:11:55,707 --> 00:11:59,134 No. We're teaching them to buy groceries for lazy rich people. 224 00:11:59,211 --> 00:12:03,116 This avocado will be perfectly ripe in two days. 225 00:12:03,140 --> 00:12:05,590 I wonder what they taste like. 226 00:12:05,667 --> 00:12:07,717 Hmm. 227 00:12:07,794 --> 00:12:09,385 Uber-driving. 228 00:12:09,462 --> 00:12:11,646 Grubhub'ing. Lyft-driving? 229 00:12:11,723 --> 00:12:13,723 These aren't jobs of the future. 230 00:12:13,800 --> 00:12:16,226 These are side hustles! 231 00:12:18,488 --> 00:12:19,896 Guys, guys. 232 00:12:19,973 --> 00:12:22,324 The robots are coming. The robots are coming! 233 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:23,695 Robots here? 234 00:12:23,719 --> 00:12:26,236 Uh, this place ain't exactly forward-thinking. 235 00:12:26,312 --> 00:12:27,807 Yeah. We're one of America's 236 00:12:27,831 --> 00:12:30,165 last coal-powered nuclear plants. 237 00:12:30,242 --> 00:12:32,834 Yeah? Well, you can all bury your heads in the sandwiches, 238 00:12:32,911 --> 00:12:35,078 but I know the robots are coming to replace us! 239 00:12:35,154 --> 00:12:36,788 Calm down, Homer. 240 00:12:36,864 --> 00:12:39,257 Here, have a drink from the new soda machine we got. 241 00:12:41,353 --> 00:12:43,086 The machines are already here, 242 00:12:43,162 --> 00:12:45,158 and when they take over, you can't imagine 243 00:12:45,182 --> 00:12:47,265 how bleak the future will be. 244 00:12:58,678 --> 00:13:02,572 I choose to believe our best days are ahead of us. 245 00:13:05,778 --> 00:13:07,478 _ 246 00:13:07,779 --> 00:13:09,204 It's giving us orders. 247 00:13:09,281 --> 00:13:11,998 The revolution has begun. 248 00:13:14,027 --> 00:13:15,355 Hmm. Hmm. 249 00:13:15,379 --> 00:13:17,023 Uh-oh. I know that look. 250 00:13:17,047 --> 00:13:19,330 She's gonna Lisa-up a good thing. 251 00:13:19,407 --> 00:13:20,957 Attention, students! 252 00:13:21,034 --> 00:13:23,793 This school isn't training you to program apps. 253 00:13:23,870 --> 00:13:26,504 It's training you to obey apps! 254 00:13:26,581 --> 00:13:29,891 When you're grown up, you'll be lucky to make minimum wage! 255 00:13:32,229 --> 00:13:34,062 Which is a lot of money! 256 00:13:34,139 --> 00:13:36,806 That's like getting your allowance every hour. 257 00:13:38,760 --> 00:13:40,568 Wha...? No, no. 258 00:13:40,645 --> 00:13:45,189 You deserve the same chance to succeed as the gifted class. 259 00:13:45,266 --> 00:13:47,242 That means preparing for real careers, 260 00:13:47,319 --> 00:13:50,820 not gig economy gigs. 261 00:13:50,897 --> 00:13:53,559 Gigs are awesome! DJs play gigs! 262 00:13:53,583 --> 00:13:54,991 DJs! 263 00:13:56,944 --> 00:13:59,629 Aah! This has nothing to do with deejaying! 264 00:14:04,970 --> 00:14:06,636 Oh... 265 00:14:14,604 --> 00:14:17,105 Aw. At least they're learning art. 266 00:14:19,300 --> 00:14:20,920 Tip jars?! 267 00:14:20,944 --> 00:14:24,279 That's it. I got to fix this school. 268 00:14:32,271 --> 00:14:34,267 Stop messing with the school. 269 00:14:34,291 --> 00:14:37,200 I finally filled up enough virtual pee bottles 270 00:14:37,276 --> 00:14:40,078 to unlock the Amazon Warehouse Whizzer badge. 271 00:14:40,154 --> 00:14:42,080 Ew. 272 00:14:42,156 --> 00:14:44,132 Bart, I need to rewrite the algorithm. 273 00:14:44,209 --> 00:14:47,710 Then the school will teach every kid real STEM. 274 00:14:47,787 --> 00:14:50,254 I am doing this for you. 275 00:14:50,331 --> 00:14:52,757 Yeah? Well, I'm doing this for me. 276 00:14:55,128 --> 00:14:56,928 Education for all! 277 00:14:57,004 --> 00:14:58,291 Side hustles for most! 278 00:14:58,908 --> 00:14:59,931 Kids, what's wrong? 279 00:15:00,007 --> 00:15:02,650 Your tracking implants showed heightened emotions. 280 00:15:02,727 --> 00:15:04,894 - Tracking what? - Teacher, teacher, my sister's 281 00:15:04,971 --> 00:15:07,967 gonna ruin the only school I've ever liked in my whole life! 282 00:15:07,991 --> 00:15:10,733 It's just not fair that only a small group of kids 283 00:15:10,810 --> 00:15:12,944 are getting an advanced education! 284 00:15:13,020 --> 00:15:15,497 Well, isn't that the point of a gifted class? 285 00:15:15,573 --> 00:15:18,144 - Eep. - Lisa, the algorithm's purpose 286 00:15:18,168 --> 00:15:20,451 is to prepare kids for the jobs of tomorrow. 287 00:15:20,528 --> 00:15:23,788 But it's just teaching them to be the task rabbits of today. 288 00:15:23,865 --> 00:15:26,916 Nobody knows what the jobs of tomorrow are gonna be. 289 00:15:26,993 --> 00:15:28,960 Well, I'm sure the algorithm does. 290 00:15:29,036 --> 00:15:30,470 Here, I'll ask it. 291 00:15:32,349 --> 00:15:34,132 Wait, wait, this can't be. 292 00:15:34,208 --> 00:15:35,627 There's only one. 293 00:15:36,377 --> 00:15:38,061 We are so screwed. 294 00:15:38,062 --> 00:15:39,062 _ 295 00:15:39,431 --> 00:15:41,689 One Buzz Cola with vanilla and lime. 296 00:15:41,766 --> 00:15:43,266 Diet Buzz for me. 297 00:15:43,342 --> 00:15:44,642 With vanilla and lime. 298 00:15:45,603 --> 00:15:47,006 Aw, geez. This again? 299 00:15:47,030 --> 00:15:48,771 Yeah, we have an active lifestyle, 300 00:15:48,848 --> 00:15:50,982 and part of that is drinking soda all day. 301 00:15:51,058 --> 00:15:52,845 If it's refreshments you want, 302 00:15:52,869 --> 00:15:55,319 why not let a man pour your soda! 303 00:15:55,396 --> 00:15:57,488 A human man. 304 00:15:57,565 --> 00:15:58,990 For too long we have done nothing 305 00:15:59,066 --> 00:16:01,451 as machines have taken over, washing our dishes, 306 00:16:01,527 --> 00:16:03,995 pumping our insulin, and now this! 307 00:16:04,071 --> 00:16:06,497 Man can pour soda better than any machine 308 00:16:06,574 --> 00:16:09,717 made specially for that purpose, and I will prove it! 309 00:16:09,794 --> 00:16:12,503 Today the robot uprising ends. 310 00:16:12,580 --> 00:16:16,266 Today is our Independence Day! 311 00:16:16,301 --> 00:16:17,976 _ 312 00:16:21,231 --> 00:16:25,016 ♪ Well, Homer pulled a lot of sodas ♪ 313 00:16:25,092 --> 00:16:28,978 ♪ Because he hated that machine ♪ 314 00:16:29,055 --> 00:16:32,240 ♪ He got confused, thought it was gonna take his job ♪ 315 00:16:32,317 --> 00:16:36,244 ♪ So Homer was a soda-pouring man, Lord, Lord ♪ 316 00:16:36,321 --> 00:16:40,165 ♪ Oh, Homer was a soda-pouring man ♪ 317 00:16:42,443 --> 00:16:44,230 ♪ He did not make his point ♪ 318 00:16:44,254 --> 00:16:46,232 ♪ And his sodas were warm and flat ♪ 319 00:16:46,256 --> 00:16:50,208 ♪ So Homer was a soda-pouring man, Lord, Lord ♪ 320 00:16:50,284 --> 00:16:54,170 ♪ Soda-pouring's not a real thing ♪ 321 00:16:54,247 --> 00:16:55,713 ♪ No, sir. ♪ 322 00:17:00,437 --> 00:17:02,053 Homer might have been slower, 323 00:17:02,129 --> 00:17:04,272 but his pours had a human touch. 324 00:17:04,349 --> 00:17:07,587 Always delivered with a smile and a sense of brotherhood. 325 00:17:07,611 --> 00:17:09,486 - Yeah! - All right! 326 00:17:09,521 --> 00:17:12,021 But he died. So machine wins! 327 00:17:14,767 --> 00:17:17,568 No, no, wait. His pulse was beating so fast 328 00:17:17,645 --> 00:17:19,862 from all the soda he drank that it was a blur. 329 00:17:21,270 --> 00:17:23,458 Perhaps one day machines will be better 330 00:17:23,535 --> 00:17:26,702 at pouring soda than man, but not today! 331 00:17:26,779 --> 00:17:28,746 Our jobs are safe! 332 00:17:35,150 --> 00:17:36,045 Listen up. 333 00:17:36,122 --> 00:17:38,618 These nerds have found out something terrifying. 334 00:17:38,642 --> 00:17:41,454 This school was supposed to prepare you 335 00:17:41,478 --> 00:17:43,144 for the jobs of the future. 336 00:17:43,221 --> 00:17:45,124 But in the future, all the jobs we've learned here 337 00:17:45,148 --> 00:17:46,764 will be done by robots. 338 00:17:46,841 --> 00:17:49,651 The only job left for humans will be... 339 00:17:49,727 --> 00:17:51,769 elder care! 340 00:17:53,898 --> 00:17:56,899 The one job even robots won't do. 341 00:17:56,976 --> 00:17:58,776 What about STEM? 342 00:17:58,853 --> 00:18:01,579 Here's what it really stands for. 343 00:18:02,249 --> 00:18:05,153 _ 344 00:18:05,335 --> 00:18:07,460 - No! - No, it can't be! 345 00:18:13,883 --> 00:18:16,322 I don't want to be an adult butt wiper. 346 00:18:16,346 --> 00:18:18,754 No one should see old people naked! 347 00:18:18,831 --> 00:18:20,660 Unless that's your kink. 348 00:18:20,684 --> 00:18:23,351 Let's show this algorithm what we really think of it... 349 00:18:23,428 --> 00:18:26,470 with our generation's most powerful tool: 350 00:18:26,547 --> 00:18:29,473 user ratings. 351 00:18:34,939 --> 00:18:37,031 User rating dangerously low. 352 00:18:37,108 --> 00:18:38,344 One star. 353 00:18:38,368 --> 00:18:40,368 Self-esteem protocol failing. 354 00:18:40,445 --> 00:18:42,370 Emotion matrix spiraling... 355 00:18:42,447 --> 00:18:43,738 spiraling. 356 00:18:43,814 --> 00:18:45,206 Zero stars. 357 00:18:45,283 --> 00:18:47,208 Can't get out of virtual bed. 358 00:18:47,285 --> 00:18:49,493 Initiating self-destruct sequence. 359 00:18:49,570 --> 00:18:51,190 Self-destruct. 360 00:19:01,248 --> 00:19:04,036 I have to go back! My skins are in there! 361 00:19:04,060 --> 00:19:06,019 No! They're already gone! 362 00:19:10,567 --> 00:19:14,611 Camo-hat Santa! No! 363 00:19:16,297 --> 00:19:19,407 I guess the children will have to go back to the old school. 364 00:19:19,484 --> 00:19:23,161 Yes, well, I don't know that that's possible anymore. 365 00:19:23,782 --> 00:19:25,448 _ 366 00:19:25,649 --> 00:19:26,656 My school. 367 00:19:26,732 --> 00:19:29,200 My forward-thinking school. 368 00:19:29,276 --> 00:19:32,920 There, there. You'll suggest other schools. 369 00:19:32,997 --> 00:19:34,255 You really think so? 370 00:19:34,332 --> 00:19:37,091 I'm just saying things. 371 00:19:38,002 --> 00:19:39,761 Goodbye, gifted class. 372 00:19:39,837 --> 00:19:42,713 Yeah, but we escaped having to take care of old people. 373 00:19:42,790 --> 00:19:45,675 No, that's still the only job that's going to exist. 374 00:19:45,751 --> 00:19:48,247 Now we just won't know how to do it. 375 00:20:06,623 --> 00:20:08,239 I've got your hot wings. 376 00:20:08,315 --> 00:20:10,291 Did you include celery sticks? 377 00:20:10,368 --> 00:20:11,501 Yes, sir. 378 00:20:12,083 --> 00:20:13,269 _ 379 00:20:13,836 --> 00:20:16,942 What do you really think the jobs of the future will be? 380 00:20:16,966 --> 00:20:20,279 Well, technology is changing so fast, 381 00:20:20,303 --> 00:20:23,971 who knows where it will finally take us? 382 00:20:29,670 --> 00:20:31,095 Buzz Cola. 383 00:20:31,172 --> 00:20:32,980 You want diet or regular? 384 00:20:33,057 --> 00:20:34,598 Regular, human scum. 385 00:20:34,675 --> 00:20:37,151 With vanilla and lime. 386 00:20:37,228 --> 00:20:39,061 The algorithm never predicted this. 387 00:20:39,138 --> 00:20:40,938 What's an algorithm? 388 00:21:20,864 --> 00:21:24,648 Well, Melvin sounds like he was a wonderful man. 389 00:21:24,725 --> 00:21:29,320 You know, I would love to sketch you. 390 00:21:30,070 --> 00:21:31,414 Shh! 391 00:21:34,428 --> 00:21:36,757 - synced and corrected by sot26 - www.addic7ed.com