1
00:00:02,561 --> 00:00:04,461
♪
2
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Aah!
3
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(school bell rings)
4
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(Barney belches)
5
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-(work whistle blows)
-Aah!
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(scanner beeps)
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(playing blues riff)
8
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(tires screech)
9
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Mm.
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(tires screeching)
11
00:00:58,708 --> 00:01:00,392
-(horn and toy horn honk)
-What? Whatcha...
12
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(tires screech)
13
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D'oh!
14
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(tires screech)
15
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(grunts)
16
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(hushed):
Who the hell are these people?
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♪
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Why you... (frustrated grunting)
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Oh, my pâté de campagne!
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My "Kick me" sign!
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(tires screeching)
22
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Oh, how could she?
Why would she?
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So many feelings,
all of them anger.
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Must drive them away.
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Rage belongs on the road.
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(tires screeching)
27
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(growls angrily)
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-(shouting gibberish)
-(meowing)
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(shouting gibberish)
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(tires screeching)
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Where the hell's my phone?
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Got to express my rage
to the person who enraged me:
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my wife.
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(people murmuring, shouting)
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Marge, I am so, so,
36
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so, so angry.
37
00:02:28,056 --> 00:02:30,056
Anger emoji, skull emoji,
38
00:02:30,058 --> 00:02:32,634
eggplant emoji,
because I hate eggplant.
39
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Fire, fire, fire. Aah!
40
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A fire-fire-fire hydrant!
41
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Okay, Homer, stay calm.
42
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Your seat belt will save you.
43
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Wha?
44
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Thank God I still got my airbag.
45
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Safety first.
46
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Hmm?
47
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-Ah. (snoring)
-(whimpers)
48
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Well, at least I got
shatter-proof glass.
49
00:02:55,918 --> 00:02:57,676
Oh, it's shattering!
50
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(distorted):
D'oh...!
51
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(gasps)
52
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I'm soaring through the air
like an angel,
53
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or a beautiful loogie.
54
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How very majestic
the world looks from up here.
55
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The sky, the ocean,
56
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Ralph.
57
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Bart's bald mommy
is going to die.
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That's her problem. (laughs)
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FEMALE VOICE:
Homer? Yo, big man.
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Now's not the time to chill.
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What? Who the hell was that?
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It's me, Maggie's
Happy Little Elf doll.
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Oh, yeah.
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00:03:32,621 --> 00:03:33,712
She calls you Goobie-Woo.
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Of course she does.
That's my damn name.
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00:03:36,199 --> 00:03:39,051
Okay. Sheesh, Goobie-Woo.
67
00:03:39,053 --> 00:03:40,961
But how are you talking
right now?
68
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That's a little complicated.
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You see, I'm a projection
of your psyche,
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and you're in the middle of
a very traumatic life event.
71
00:03:48,044 --> 00:03:50,187
Traumatic? What do you mean?
I feel great.
72
00:03:51,640 --> 00:03:52,973
(humming happily)
73
00:03:52,975 --> 00:03:56,884
Homer. Homer, what you're
currently experiencing
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is called
post-traumatic elation.
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00:03:59,240 --> 00:04:01,147
-Is that like Post Raisin Bran?
-(grunts)
76
00:04:01,149 --> 00:04:03,575
Damn it, man,
you are literally in the middle
77
00:04:03,577 --> 00:04:05,327
of a car accident!
78
00:04:06,914 --> 00:04:08,822
What?! Oh, right.
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00:04:08,824 --> 00:04:10,231
Let me lay this out.
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You and me are gonna use
this car ejection
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for some self-reflection,
okay, my brother?
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00:04:15,163 --> 00:04:16,162
And that journey begins with
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finding the source
of your anger.
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00:04:17,666 --> 00:04:21,760
Now, gaze into that
little piece of glass.
85
00:04:23,264 --> 00:04:26,265
I need a safe-deposit box.
Want to know why?
86
00:04:26,267 --> 00:04:28,100
Well, that's why I got into
banking in the first place,
87
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for the thrilling stories.
88
00:04:31,013 --> 00:04:33,330
Well, this morning,
I was on my break
89
00:04:33,332 --> 00:04:34,472
-at the nuclear power plant...
-Uh-huh.
90
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...so I went and got myself
a bag of chips.
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Potato chips.
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I feel like I'm at
a story slam right now.
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They were so delicious
and salty and chompy,
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and before long,
they were all gone.
95
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-No.
-Almost.
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Oh, there's a twist?
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But then I pulled out this,
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a chip that looks exactly like
John Travolta.
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And that's why I need
a safe-deposit box,
100
00:04:58,114 --> 00:05:00,966
to protect this treasure
forever.
101
00:05:02,361 --> 00:05:05,137
Oh, don't study opera staging
in Vienna, they said.
102
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Work in a bank, they said.
103
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Mm-hmm. Mr. Simpson,
it looks like your family
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already has a safe-deposit box.
105
00:05:15,131 --> 00:05:17,983
Your wife rented it out
over a decade ago.
106
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-Wow, you've got a wife.
-Wha?
107
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Now, I'm not supposed to
show you this,
108
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but lucky for you right now
I'm super high.
109
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"Last will and testament"?
110
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Written by Clarence Bouvier,
your father-in-law.
111
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Marge's dad left a will?
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He never told me about that
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in the four conversations
we ever had.
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It says here he set up a trust
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to pay Marge Simpson,
ooh, $1,000 a month.
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A thousand dollars? What? No.
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No! What?!
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No! No? What?
119
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No.
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And I can confirm that
your wife has been
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receiving that money every month
since her father died.
122
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Marge has been getting
all that money for years,
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and she never told me about it.
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I-I don't know what to feel.
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In these situations,
many of our customers
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opt for extreme rage.
127
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Well, I hate to just
follow the crowd, but...
128
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(growling angrily)
129
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(grumbling, muttering)
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So that's why I was so mad.
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And that's why
I'm even angrier now.
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For all these years, Marge has
been hiding money from me.
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It's a blatant act of, of, uh...
134
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The term is
"financial infidelity."
135
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And I can see how
you'd be angry.
136
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Oh, thank you.
137
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-But it's the wrong emotion
to feel.
-Damn it.
138
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Homer, I'm gonna help you
work through this anger
139
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so you can find peace.
140
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Aw, work? That sounds like work.
141
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How much time do I have?
142
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I'd say about
point-three seconds
143
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-judging by how fast
you're flying towards that tree.
-Aah!
144
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Oh, my God, we're airborne.
145
00:06:50,819 --> 00:06:52,661
-Whoa!
-(all scream)
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I don't know which one
I'm more upset about,
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that my wife has been keeping
148
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a secret mountain of cash
from me,
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or that I'm about to die
in a stupid, violent car wreck.
150
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Don't make me choose,
Goobie-Woo.
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00:07:08,003 --> 00:07:09,928
(Homer crying out)
152
00:07:09,930 --> 00:07:11,078
Homer, you're spiraling.
153
00:07:11,080 --> 00:07:13,323
Of course I'm spiraling.
154
00:07:13,325 --> 00:07:15,825
I'm literally flying
through the air.
155
00:07:15,827 --> 00:07:18,328
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
156
00:07:18,330 --> 00:07:21,347
Listen, I know you're feeling
all the feels right now,
157
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but we're getting closer
to the real source of your rage.
158
00:07:23,351 --> 00:07:27,279
What? I'm sorry,
I'm eating my feelings.
159
00:07:27,281 --> 00:07:30,523
Bad Homer. Spit out that food,
and those feelings.
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(grunts) What was Marge
spending that money on?
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00:07:33,269 --> 00:07:36,029
And why did she keep it a secret
from everybody?
162
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LISA:
Um, not everybody, Dad.
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00:07:38,200 --> 00:07:40,107
I hate to say it,
but we've known about
164
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Mom's secret cash
for quite some time.
165
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Yeah, that's why I laugh myself
to sleep every night.
166
00:07:45,132 --> 00:07:47,799
What? And here I've been
worried sick about
167
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your night giggles.
168
00:07:49,044 --> 00:07:51,303
Let me tell you
how we found out.
169
00:07:51,305 --> 00:07:54,306
I was blowing off steam
one day...
170
00:07:58,962 --> 00:08:02,647
...and I saw that Mom was
getting $100,000 a month!
171
00:08:02,649 --> 00:08:05,400
LISA:
Then I explained to Bart
how decimal points work.
172
00:08:08,213 --> 00:08:10,897
Then we asked Mom about it,
and she admitted
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00:08:10,899 --> 00:08:12,324
the whole thing.
174
00:08:12,326 --> 00:08:16,720
So then tell me, why did she
keep the money a secret?
175
00:08:16,722 --> 00:08:17,996
I don't think you can handle it.
176
00:08:17,998 --> 00:08:20,223
-I can handle it.
-Okay.
177
00:08:20,225 --> 00:08:21,891
The reason is...
178
00:08:21,910 --> 00:08:24,669
(imitating Marge):
Your father is
an ape-faced butt monster
179
00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:27,822
who eats booger sandwiches
and also sucks.
180
00:08:27,824 --> 00:08:29,323
(laughs)
181
00:08:29,325 --> 00:08:32,827
Why, you little
unreliable narrator!
182
00:08:32,829 --> 00:08:35,180
Ow! Glass is sharp.
183
00:08:35,182 --> 00:08:38,499
Oh, even my kids knew
I was being fiscally unmanned.
184
00:08:38,501 --> 00:08:40,260
(normal voice):
Okay, got to go, ape face.
185
00:08:40,262 --> 00:08:41,578
See you at your funeral.
186
00:08:41,671 --> 00:08:44,505
We'll be the kids running around
in our nice clothes,
187
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poignantly unaware of
the finality of death.
188
00:08:47,343 --> 00:08:50,529
Oh, that tree can't
get here fast enough.
189
00:08:50,531 --> 00:08:51,604
(straining)
190
00:08:51,606 --> 00:08:53,180
Okay, Michael Phelps,
191
00:08:53,182 --> 00:08:54,366
don't swim to your death
just yet.
192
00:08:54,368 --> 00:08:57,035
Don't you want to find out
what Marge been
193
00:08:57,037 --> 00:08:58,703
spending the money on?
194
00:08:58,705 --> 00:09:00,521
Oh, you bet I do.
195
00:09:00,523 --> 00:09:03,266
Well, that's what I thought.
Give me your best guess.
196
00:09:03,268 --> 00:09:04,284
I want to give her
the benefit of the doubt,
197
00:09:04,286 --> 00:09:08,438
but I can't help
but imagine the worst.
198
00:09:08,440 --> 00:09:11,441
See you later. I'm off to earn
our only source of income.
199
00:09:11,443 --> 00:09:17,130
He's gone. Robo-butler,
bring me a caviar hoagie.
200
00:09:17,132 --> 00:09:21,726
(robotic voice):
My word. This is so expensive.
201
00:09:21,728 --> 00:09:24,045
Mmm. Mmm-mmm.
202
00:09:24,047 --> 00:09:25,897
You know what else
I'm paying for?
203
00:09:25,899 --> 00:09:29,568
Sexy handymen doing chores
around the house.
204
00:09:29,570 --> 00:09:32,462
♪ I got this feeling on the
summer day when you were gone ♪
205
00:09:32,464 --> 00:09:35,056
♪ I crashed my car
into the bridge ♪
206
00:09:35,058 --> 00:09:37,075
♪ I don't care ♪
207
00:09:37,077 --> 00:09:40,061
♪ I love it ♪
208
00:09:40,063 --> 00:09:42,063
♪ I don't care ♪
209
00:09:42,065 --> 00:09:43,807
♪ I love it, I love it... ♪
210
00:09:43,809 --> 00:09:45,308
I don't know which I love more,
211
00:09:45,310 --> 00:09:48,645
being rich or hiding it
from my husband.
212
00:09:48,647 --> 00:09:49,345
(robotic laugh)
213
00:09:49,423 --> 00:09:52,832
Let us mock him through dance.
214
00:09:52,834 --> 00:09:54,384
(rapid mechanical whirring)
215
00:09:56,671 --> 00:09:57,762
♪ I love it. ♪
216
00:09:57,764 --> 00:09:58,763
(growling angrily)
217
00:09:58,765 --> 00:10:00,915
-Whew, Homer, I hesitate to ask,
218
00:10:00,917 --> 00:10:02,601
but why does your brain think
219
00:10:02,603 --> 00:10:04,828
that's what Marge is doing
with the money?
220
00:10:04,830 --> 00:10:06,271
Because it's what I'd do.
221
00:10:06,273 --> 00:10:08,014
Except the repairmen would be
my favorite rock stars:
222
00:10:08,016 --> 00:10:10,350
Kiss, Bon Jovi, Men at Work,
223
00:10:10,352 --> 00:10:12,852
because of
their excellent work ethic.
224
00:10:12,854 --> 00:10:14,187
-(grunts)
-Stop!
225
00:10:14,189 --> 00:10:16,522
Your wife is a
much better person than you are,
226
00:10:16,524 --> 00:10:19,676
and she's been using the money
in a very different way.
227
00:10:19,678 --> 00:10:20,860
So no robot butler?
228
00:10:20,862 --> 00:10:23,513
♪ You been wasting
all your time ♪
229
00:10:23,515 --> 00:10:25,272
♪ Throwing shade at Marge ♪
230
00:10:25,274 --> 00:10:27,700
♪ You think behind your back
that, yeah ♪
231
00:10:27,702 --> 00:10:29,294
♪ She's been living large ♪
232
00:10:29,296 --> 00:10:33,965
♪ Well, I really, really hate
to burst your bubble, boo ♪
233
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:35,967
♪ All this time,
she been spending ♪
234
00:10:35,969 --> 00:10:38,695
-♪ All that cash on you ♪
-On me? No way.
235
00:10:38,697 --> 00:10:39,863
I'm sure that-- Huh?
236
00:10:39,865 --> 00:10:41,455
♪ Homie, Homer, check your elf ♪
237
00:10:41,457 --> 00:10:42,957
♪ You ain't too bright,
I'll explain the sitch ♪
238
00:10:42,959 --> 00:10:46,202
♪ All them problems
you think you solved yourself ♪
239
00:10:46,204 --> 00:10:47,312
♪ That was Marge, bitch ♪
240
00:10:47,314 --> 00:10:49,539
♪ That was Marge,
bitch ♪
241
00:10:49,541 --> 00:10:52,208
♪ The time your bar tab
was forgiven by Moe ♪
242
00:10:52,210 --> 00:10:53,634
♪ That was Marge, bitch ♪
243
00:10:53,636 --> 00:10:56,729
♪ That time Dr. Hibbert
reattached your big toe ♪
244
00:10:56,731 --> 00:10:58,139
♪ That was Marge, bitch ♪
245
00:10:58,141 --> 00:11:00,825
♪ The time you got off
of that DUI ♪
246
00:11:00,827 --> 00:11:02,235
♪ That was Marge, bitch ♪
247
00:11:02,237 --> 00:11:04,645
♪ I think by now
you know the reason why ♪
248
00:11:04,647 --> 00:11:06,739
Goobie-Woo in da house!
249
00:11:06,741 --> 00:11:08,315
-Oh, my God.
-Whoo!
250
00:11:08,317 --> 00:11:10,243
All this time, I've been
thinking the worst about Marge,
251
00:11:10,245 --> 00:11:14,822
but she was using the money
to save me.
252
00:11:14,824 --> 00:11:16,582
Ya think?
253
00:11:16,584 --> 00:11:20,586
And she only kept it a secret
to save your dumbass male pride.
254
00:11:20,588 --> 00:11:25,408
♪ Well, Goobie-Goobie-Woo,
now I can clearly see ♪
255
00:11:25,410 --> 00:11:27,260
♪ I've got the greatest wife
and spouse ♪
256
00:11:27,262 --> 00:11:29,688
♪ That there could ever be ♪
257
00:11:29,690 --> 00:11:31,097
♪ And what's more... ♪
Huh?
258
00:11:31,099 --> 00:11:33,340
Holy crap,
I just flew past the tree!
259
00:11:33,342 --> 00:11:35,268
♪ You're gonna live, bitch ♪
260
00:11:35,270 --> 00:11:37,696
♪ You're gonna live,
bitch ♪
261
00:11:37,698 --> 00:11:39,255
♪ You're gonna live, bitch ♪
262
00:11:39,257 --> 00:11:41,107
♪ Yeah, I'm gonna live. ♪
263
00:11:41,109 --> 00:11:42,367
-(laughs)
-Whoo!
264
00:11:42,369 --> 00:11:45,428
Thank God, I don't have to
be mad at Marge anymore.
265
00:11:45,430 --> 00:11:48,431
If anything, you should be mad
at Marge's dad.
266
00:11:48,433 --> 00:11:51,042
-Huh?
-Oh, snap,
I shouldn't have said that.
267
00:11:51,044 --> 00:11:52,043
"Oh, snap"?
What do you mean, "Oh, snap"?
268
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:54,713
Oh, snap, why not?
What do you know?
269
00:11:54,715 --> 00:11:57,106
Nothing. And closure! (chuckles)
270
00:11:57,108 --> 00:11:59,200
Closure-closure,
closure-closure.
271
00:11:59,202 --> 00:12:01,535
Oh, no. I got to know
what Marge's dad did,
272
00:12:01,537 --> 00:12:02,795
or said or rapped.
273
00:12:02,797 --> 00:12:07,283
Aha, and I've got
the magical footage right here.
274
00:12:07,285 --> 00:12:09,619
Don't look at it!
You've come so far.
275
00:12:09,621 --> 00:12:12,063
Inner peace has almost defeated
your outer rage.
276
00:12:12,065 --> 00:12:14,307
You've got to be strong, man.
277
00:12:14,309 --> 00:12:16,626
So if I look at
that piece of glass,
278
00:12:16,628 --> 00:12:17,902
I could change my fate
279
00:12:17,904 --> 00:12:19,887
and perhaps even risk
my very soul?
280
00:12:19,889 --> 00:12:22,389
Well, I'm cool with that.
281
00:12:22,391 --> 00:12:23,299
What the hell?!
282
00:12:23,392 --> 00:12:26,077
But, Dad,
Homer has a good heart,
283
00:12:26,079 --> 00:12:28,246
and I'm going to marry him.
284
00:12:28,248 --> 00:12:30,231
Oh, honey, this Simpson fellow
will never provide for you.
285
00:12:30,233 --> 00:12:33,101
He has jackass written
all over him.
286
00:12:33,103 --> 00:12:35,736
Marge, do you have
any turpentine?
287
00:12:35,738 --> 00:12:37,505
It's not coming off.
288
00:12:37,832 --> 00:12:39,816
Hmm.
289
00:12:39,818 --> 00:12:43,002
His friends did that
after he fell asleep at a party.
290
00:12:43,004 --> 00:12:46,005
Homer's the sweetest person
I've ever met.
291
00:12:46,007 --> 00:12:47,490
Every time I look into his eyes,
292
00:12:47,492 --> 00:12:50,918
I see someone who will
never stop loving me.
293
00:12:50,920 --> 00:12:53,921
Oh... crap.
294
00:12:53,923 --> 00:12:56,332
Look, I'm gonna leave you
something special in my will
295
00:12:56,334 --> 00:12:58,167
to make sure you're okay,
because you've found
296
00:12:58,169 --> 00:12:59,927
every father's worst nightmare:
297
00:12:59,929 --> 00:13:04,098
true love with a true loser.
298
00:13:04,100 --> 00:13:07,026
Loser? But I thought
Marge's dad liked me.
299
00:13:07,028 --> 00:13:08,936
He was always warning me about
300
00:13:08,938 --> 00:13:10,955
doors hitting my butt
on the way out.
301
00:13:10,957 --> 00:13:13,107
How dare he emasculate me
from beyond the grave?
302
00:13:13,109 --> 00:13:16,795
Uh-huh. I told you
not to look at it.
303
00:13:16,797 --> 00:13:18,630
Wait, how could I remember
that talk
304
00:13:18,632 --> 00:13:21,299
between Marge and her dad
if I wasn't around to see it?
305
00:13:21,301 --> 00:13:24,636
You can see stuff like that
'cause you're a ghost now.
306
00:13:24,638 --> 00:13:26,471
You dead.
307
00:13:28,033 --> 00:13:29,456
(ghostlike):
D'oh...!
308
00:13:29,458 --> 00:13:31,384
I tried to tell you,
and you didn't want to hear me.
309
00:13:31,386 --> 00:13:35,204
You was eating your feelings
and carrying on.
310
00:13:35,206 --> 00:13:37,148
Goobie-Woo knows what's good.
311
00:13:38,226 --> 00:13:40,527
I'm gonna see this
in every dream now.
312
00:13:44,232 --> 00:13:46,566
Oh, my God, I'm in heaven now.
313
00:13:46,568 --> 00:13:49,052
It's so huge, so majestic.
314
00:13:49,054 --> 00:13:50,662
So red.
315
00:13:52,481 --> 00:13:55,149
Ooh, it's one of heaven's
goaty-footed angels.
316
00:13:55,151 --> 00:13:56,650
And look at that giant fork.
317
00:13:56,652 --> 00:14:00,654
Probably for eating
delicious, heavenly s'mores.
318
00:14:00,656 --> 00:14:02,231
Think again, pally.
319
00:14:02,233 --> 00:14:03,842
-(flesh sizzles)
-Ow!
320
00:14:03,844 --> 00:14:05,492
Wait a second, I'm in hell?
But why?
321
00:14:05,494 --> 00:14:08,329
Because you committed
the deadly sin of wrath
322
00:14:08,331 --> 00:14:10,664
against your father-in-law.
323
00:14:10,666 --> 00:14:14,168
So what? Everybody hates
everybody these days.
324
00:14:14,170 --> 00:14:16,262
Plus the rest of
the seven deadly sins
325
00:14:16,264 --> 00:14:19,357
all in the last half second
of your life.
326
00:14:19,359 --> 00:14:21,442
♪
327
00:14:33,098 --> 00:14:35,114
Whoo-hoo! I hit for the cycle!
328
00:14:35,116 --> 00:14:37,191
Okay, so this is
where you check in
329
00:14:37,193 --> 00:14:39,526
for your eternal punishments.
330
00:14:39,528 --> 00:14:40,027
Who are they?
331
00:14:40,029 --> 00:14:42,622
(lively chatter)
332
00:14:42,624 --> 00:14:45,608
That's our exchange program
we have with heaven.
333
00:14:45,610 --> 00:14:47,777
We send them people
condemned for sins
334
00:14:47,779 --> 00:14:48,961
that aren't sins anymore.
335
00:14:49,055 --> 00:14:51,464
FEMALE ANNOUNCER:
All aboard for those damned
336
00:14:51,466 --> 00:14:56,135
for being gay between 5000 BC
and like ten years ago.
337
00:14:56,137 --> 00:14:57,303
-It's about damn time.
-(all cheer)
338
00:14:57,305 --> 00:14:59,213
Make way for Miss Thing!
339
00:15:00,625 --> 00:15:02,883
FEMALE ANNOUNCER:
Now arriving,
former residents of heaven
340
00:15:02,885 --> 00:15:06,295
who are now considered bad
by today's standards.
341
00:15:06,297 --> 00:15:08,055
Wherefore art I in hell?
342
00:15:08,057 --> 00:15:09,465
I gave the world Othello.
343
00:15:09,467 --> 00:15:12,559
Yeah, and performed it
in blackface.
344
00:15:12,561 --> 00:15:14,078
Get outta here.
345
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:15,304
(fierce growling)
346
00:15:15,306 --> 00:15:17,731
I didn't even actually
write the plays!
347
00:15:17,733 --> 00:15:21,144
Okay, Mr. Simpson,
looks like your punishment is
348
00:15:21,146 --> 00:15:22,495
to be boiled alive
for all eternity
349
00:15:22,497 --> 00:15:24,664
-in a lake of blood.
-All right.
350
00:15:24,666 --> 00:15:25,924
Just wait over there.
351
00:15:25,926 --> 00:15:28,426
Oh, there's a line?
352
00:15:30,413 --> 00:15:32,096
Hey, do you mind if
I go ahead of you?
353
00:15:32,098 --> 00:15:34,140
Yeah, in fact, I do mind.
354
00:15:37,328 --> 00:15:40,730
Oh, for... Oh... (groaning)
355
00:15:43,259 --> 00:15:44,609
Fine, take this buzzer.
356
00:15:44,611 --> 00:15:46,202
When we're ready for you,
it'll electrocute you
357
00:15:46,204 --> 00:15:47,946
and set your torso aflame!
358
00:15:47,948 --> 00:15:50,865
I know how buzzers work.
359
00:15:51,767 --> 00:15:54,010
(people screaming, crying out)
360
00:15:54,012 --> 00:15:57,196
Ooh, poker.
361
00:15:57,198 --> 00:15:59,606
Oh, boy, I got-a the best hand.
362
00:15:59,608 --> 00:16:01,017
I'm-a gonna win.
363
00:16:01,019 --> 00:16:02,018
Ha! Nice bluff, Benito.
364
00:16:02,020 --> 00:16:04,796
(laughter)
365
00:16:04,798 --> 00:16:08,633
Marge's dead dad!
366
00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:11,377
(grunting)
367
00:16:11,379 --> 00:16:13,362
You thought
I wasn't worthy of Marge.
368
00:16:13,364 --> 00:16:15,198
I'll kill you
and send you to super-hell!
369
00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:16,975
Hey, hey, behave yourself.
370
00:16:16,977 --> 00:16:19,702
We have standards here.
371
00:16:19,704 --> 00:16:21,220
Shut up, Tom Selleck!
372
00:16:21,222 --> 00:16:23,314
What Marge's dad did to me
was super-sucky.
373
00:16:23,316 --> 00:16:26,375
It's probably the reason
he ended up here.
374
00:16:26,377 --> 00:16:28,060
Actually, he ended up here
thanks to an unrelated
375
00:16:28,062 --> 00:16:30,304
check forging scheme.
376
00:16:30,306 --> 00:16:33,324
Checks. Remember them?
(chuckles)
377
00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:35,184
Oh, crazy.
378
00:16:35,186 --> 00:16:37,144
Homer, uh, let's you and me
take a walk.
379
00:16:37,146 --> 00:16:40,239
Walking?
Oh, this really is hell.
380
00:16:40,241 --> 00:16:42,583
-I want to show you something.
-(man groaning)
381
00:16:44,896 --> 00:16:46,579
Wow, another screen?
382
00:16:46,581 --> 00:16:50,249
Yeah, this is hell.
Screens everywhere.
383
00:16:50,251 --> 00:16:53,511
Mom, Dad, I'd like you
to meet Mercer.
384
00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:55,162
He designs board games.
385
00:16:55,164 --> 00:16:57,256
Oh, like Parker Brothers?
386
00:16:57,258 --> 00:17:00,259
(laughs)
Yeah, like Parker Brothers. No.
387
00:17:00,261 --> 00:17:03,354
You actually play that
mainstream corporate garbage?
388
00:17:03,356 --> 00:17:06,098
You're so lucky
to be meeting me today.
389
00:17:06,100 --> 00:17:08,175
Seriously, I am
so jealous of you.
390
00:17:08,177 --> 00:17:09,418
Check this out.
391
00:17:09,420 --> 00:17:12,196
My new game
is gonna be a huge hit.
392
00:17:13,366 --> 00:17:15,424
It combines the Stratego-ness
of Stratego,
393
00:17:15,426 --> 00:17:18,611
the implicit sexual tension
of Twister,
394
00:17:18,613 --> 00:17:21,873
and the hard-driving whimsy
of Tic-Tac-Toe.
395
00:17:21,875 --> 00:17:24,100
It's called Side-gammon.
396
00:17:24,102 --> 00:17:27,128
Who's up for a game? Huh?
397
00:17:28,439 --> 00:17:30,030
Oh, come on!
398
00:17:30,032 --> 00:17:31,440
It's super complicated!
399
00:17:31,442 --> 00:17:33,367
You'll be out
before you know it,
400
00:17:33,369 --> 00:17:35,444
and you'll be humiliated!
401
00:17:35,446 --> 00:17:37,889
(growls angrily) Excuse me,
I have to go yell something
402
00:17:37,891 --> 00:17:40,283
into your washer-dryer.
403
00:17:40,285 --> 00:17:43,227
He really is brilliant,
and he has a good heart.
404
00:17:43,229 --> 00:17:44,711
-I'm going to marry him.
-(door closes)
405
00:17:44,713 --> 00:17:46,972
MERCER (in other room):
I'm the Mozart of board games
406
00:17:46,974 --> 00:17:48,124
and novelties!
407
00:17:48,126 --> 00:17:51,460
Why, that guy's a total loser.
408
00:17:51,462 --> 00:17:53,479
I don't want him to marry Lisa.
409
00:17:53,481 --> 00:17:56,390
Wait, I was never as bad
as him, was I?
410
00:17:56,392 --> 00:17:59,468
(chuckles)
Actually, there was a time
411
00:17:59,470 --> 00:18:01,137
when I would have preferred
that guy to you.
412
00:18:01,139 --> 00:18:02,488
Plus, you know what?
413
00:18:02,490 --> 00:18:04,307
We got an advance copy
of Side-gammon,
414
00:18:04,309 --> 00:18:06,584
-and it's not bad.
-Oh, my God.
415
00:18:06,586 --> 00:18:09,312
I'm starting to see things
from another point of view.
416
00:18:09,314 --> 00:18:10,496
Your point of view.
417
00:18:10,498 --> 00:18:12,498
I didn't even know
other people had those.
418
00:18:12,500 --> 00:18:14,425
You were just worried
about Marge,
419
00:18:14,427 --> 00:18:16,094
the way I'd be worried
about Lisa.
420
00:18:16,096 --> 00:18:19,079
No matter how old
and dead we get,
421
00:18:19,081 --> 00:18:22,158
we just want to make sure
our little girls are okay.
422
00:18:22,160 --> 00:18:24,660
-(buzzer buzzing)
-D'oh!
423
00:18:24,662 --> 00:18:27,087
FEMALE ANNOUNCER:
Homer Simpson,
we are now ready
424
00:18:27,089 --> 00:18:29,256
to boil you for eternity
in a lake of blood.
425
00:18:29,258 --> 00:18:33,111
Wow, suddenly
that doesn't sound so good.
426
00:18:33,113 --> 00:18:35,446
(angelic choir sings)
427
00:18:35,448 --> 00:18:36,948
Eh, you just had
an epiphany, pally,
428
00:18:36,950 --> 00:18:38,524
which means you get
to go back to your life.
429
00:18:38,526 --> 00:18:42,936
It's a dumb rule, but we need
a two-thirds vote to change it.
430
00:18:42,938 --> 00:18:44,455
Which is also a dumb rule.
431
00:18:44,457 --> 00:18:46,682
What can I say?
Hell ain't perfect.
432
00:18:46,684 --> 00:18:48,701
Homer, you're getting
another chance.
433
00:18:48,703 --> 00:18:52,279
Now, get the hell out of hell
and go back to my daughter.
434
00:18:52,281 --> 00:18:55,691
You heard the man.
Let's get your ass home.
435
00:18:55,693 --> 00:18:56,259
(angelic choir sings)
436
00:18:58,504 --> 00:18:59,971
BOTH:
Ow!
437
00:18:59,973 --> 00:19:02,598
-Damn, that hurt.
-(groans)
438
00:19:05,127 --> 00:19:07,461
You died and went to hell.
439
00:19:07,463 --> 00:19:08,871
Ralph knows.
440
00:19:08,873 --> 00:19:10,481
Whee!
441
00:19:12,226 --> 00:19:13,317
Thank you, Goobie-Woo.
442
00:19:13,319 --> 00:19:15,969
I learned more
tumbling through the air
443
00:19:15,971 --> 00:19:18,881
than I ever did
tumbling through my life.
444
00:19:18,883 --> 00:19:20,992
-(tires screech)
-(siren whoops)
445
00:19:24,055 --> 00:19:25,997
-(gasps) Dad!
-Homer!
446
00:19:27,742 --> 00:19:30,075
Goobie-Woo. (giggles)
447
00:19:30,077 --> 00:19:32,819
Oh, Homie,
thank God you're okay.
448
00:19:32,821 --> 00:19:34,714
(Homer groaning)
449
00:19:38,920 --> 00:19:40,327
Homer, I have to ask you,
450
00:19:40,329 --> 00:19:43,723
why did you send me
that angry text?
451
00:19:46,019 --> 00:19:47,243
It doesn't matter.
452
00:19:47,245 --> 00:19:49,245
I have since set aside
my own ego
453
00:19:49,247 --> 00:19:51,580
and learned to savor
my many blessings.
454
00:19:51,582 --> 00:19:55,193
And you, my darling,
are foremost amongst them.
455
00:19:55,195 --> 00:19:58,103
I don't understand
a thing he's saying.
456
00:19:58,105 --> 00:20:00,531
(shouting gibberish)
457
00:20:02,760 --> 00:20:04,777
He seems to be in a lot of pain.
458
00:20:04,779 --> 00:20:06,278
Can't you give him something?
459
00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:07,430
Absolutely not.
460
00:20:07,432 --> 00:20:08,597
No can do till we get
to the hospital.
461
00:20:08,599 --> 00:20:11,784
(groaning)
462
00:20:11,786 --> 00:20:13,127
(Marge sighs)
463
00:20:16,457 --> 00:20:18,382
(sighs):
Ah.
464
00:20:18,384 --> 00:20:21,636
I guess I can go another month
without a new purse.
465
00:20:23,038 --> 00:20:25,798
♪ That's the end, bitch ♪
466
00:20:25,800 --> 00:20:27,892
♪ That's the end,
bitch ♪
467
00:20:27,894 --> 00:20:28,893
♪ That's the end. ♪
468
00:20:28,895 --> 00:20:31,454
That's the end. (laughs)
469
00:20:31,456 --> 00:20:33,731
Captioning sponsored by
20th CENTURY FOX TELEVISION
470
00:20:33,733 --> 00:20:35,549
and FOX BROADCASTING COMPANY
471
00:20:35,551 --> 00:20:36,976
and TOYOTA.
472
00:20:37,070 --> 00:20:39,237
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
473
00:20:42,242 --> 00:20:44,725
You see, I'm a projection
of your psyche,
474
00:20:44,727 --> 00:20:46,226
and you're in the middle of
475
00:20:46,228 --> 00:20:49,229
-a very traumatic life event.
-LISA: And cut.
476
00:20:49,231 --> 00:20:50,748
Now we should move on
to the part
477
00:20:50,750 --> 00:20:52,566
where your character slaps Dad.
478
00:20:52,568 --> 00:20:53,900
Wait a minute,
isn't that just a sound effect?
479
00:20:53,902 --> 00:20:57,646
No, it's got to be real.
Right, Lizzo?
480
00:20:57,648 --> 00:21:01,908
Uh, seems a bit excessive to me,
but, hey, pshh, you're the kid.
481
00:21:01,910 --> 00:21:03,928
You know what?
If you're uncomfortable,
482
00:21:03,930 --> 00:21:06,171
-you don't have to do it.
-(Homer sighs)
483
00:21:06,173 --> 00:21:08,582
I could do it for you.
And action!
484
00:21:08,584 --> 00:21:11,269
-(grunts)
-Maybe a few more for safety?
485
00:21:11,271 --> 00:21:12,495
(Homer grunting)
486
00:21:12,497 --> 00:21:15,422
Whose safety? (grunts)
I don't feel safe!
487
00:21:15,424 --> 00:21:18,167
-(rhythmic slapping)
-Ow. Ow.
488
00:21:18,169 --> 00:21:19,518
Why, you little...
489
00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:20,669
-This beat is fire.
-(Homer continues grunting)
490
00:21:20,671 --> 00:21:23,839
Yo, Lisa, how 'bout
I get Sasha Flute,
491
00:21:23,841 --> 00:21:25,841
you get your saxamaphone,
492
00:21:25,843 --> 00:21:27,843
and we, uh, jam?
493
00:21:27,845 --> 00:21:29,528
I'd love to.
494
00:21:29,530 --> 00:21:31,847
-(playing Simpsons theme)
-Ow. Ow.
495
00:21:31,849 --> 00:21:34,500
Ow. Stop that.
496
00:21:35,853 --> 00:21:37,778
Ow. Ow.
497
00:21:37,780 --> 00:21:41,507
Ow. Ow. Ow.
498
00:21:43,027 --> 00:21:44,860
Why, you little...
499
00:21:44,862 --> 00:21:46,862
Ow.
500
00:21:46,864 --> 00:21:48,264
(music ends)
501
00:21:49,291 --> 00:21:50,141
Shh!