1
00:00:04,630 --> 00:00:07,214
I'm just gonna attach
this lapel mic, sir.
2
00:00:08,509 --> 00:00:09,299
[grunts]
3
00:00:10,261 --> 00:00:13,595
So, you want me to talk about
persephone odair? That's easy.
4
00:00:13,723 --> 00:00:16,265
She was a brilliant entrepreneur
who wanted to save the world.
5
00:00:16,434 --> 00:00:19,143
How I wish that was
her only shortcoming.
6
00:00:20,438 --> 00:00:24,106
My company, lifeboat,
can take an ocean of salt water
7
00:00:24,150 --> 00:00:26,650
And transform it into
clean drinking water,
8
00:00:26,819 --> 00:00:28,986
Cheaply and efficiently
with a machine
9
00:00:29,071 --> 00:00:31,822
Only the size of a can of oats.
10
00:00:31,907 --> 00:00:33,282
[audience]
[gasps] oats!
11
00:00:33,409 --> 00:00:36,035
Now, the doubters call this goal
"impossible,"
12
00:00:36,162 --> 00:00:39,663
But I prefer to say:
"I'm possible."
13
00:00:39,749 --> 00:00:41,707
[applause]
14
00:00:41,792 --> 00:00:43,625
♪ ♪
15
00:00:46,589 --> 00:00:48,422
[narrator] this story is about
a little girl who had a dream.
16
00:00:48,549 --> 00:00:50,215
But it begins with
another little girl
17
00:00:50,301 --> 00:00:51,592
Who allowed us
to use the footage
18
00:00:51,719 --> 00:00:54,011
From when she interviewed
the first little girl
19
00:00:54,138 --> 00:00:55,179
Who is no longer a little girl.
20
00:00:55,264 --> 00:00:57,890
I'm so excited to be
interviewing
21
00:00:58,059 --> 00:01:00,809
Persephone odair,
ceo of lifeboat.
22
00:01:00,895 --> 00:01:02,561
So, persephone,
23
00:01:02,730 --> 00:01:05,606
You were the most be-badged
girl scout of all time
24
00:01:05,733 --> 00:01:07,941
And then followed
in the footsteps of bill gates
25
00:01:08,027 --> 00:01:10,110
By dropping out of harvard
early.
26
00:01:10,196 --> 00:01:11,653
The earliest ever.
27
00:01:11,739 --> 00:01:14,990
Our car didn't even slow down on
freshmen move-in day.
28
00:01:17,161 --> 00:01:18,660
So inspirational.
29
00:01:18,788 --> 00:01:22,498
What was the "aha moment"
that gave you the idea
30
00:01:22,583 --> 00:01:23,582
To start lifeboat?
31
00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:24,875
Great question.
32
00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:27,544
And, lisa, great questions are
the jackhammers,
33
00:01:27,671 --> 00:01:30,255
Which demo the walls built
by distrupto-phobes
34
00:01:30,382 --> 00:01:33,300
To create the open floorplan
of innovation.
35
00:01:33,427 --> 00:01:36,011
I've always thought that
about questions.
36
00:01:36,097 --> 00:01:39,014
[persephone]
lisa, my grandfather was
a world war ii sailor
37
00:01:39,100 --> 00:01:40,182
Whose ship was torpedoed.
38
00:01:40,267 --> 00:01:42,684
He was stranded
on a lifeboat, lisa,
39
00:01:42,812 --> 00:01:46,555
Surrounded by water
but not a drop to drink.
40
00:01:46,649 --> 00:01:48,190
Don't tell me he died.
41
00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:48,982
Worse.
42
00:01:49,068 --> 00:01:49,942
He gave up.
43
00:01:50,027 --> 00:01:52,069
And then he died, of quitting
44
00:01:52,196 --> 00:01:54,363
And super-duper dehydration.
45
00:01:54,532 --> 00:01:56,073
But I will never give up
46
00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:59,660
Until I've raised enough capital
to make lifeboat a reality.
47
00:01:59,745 --> 00:02:01,578
[chuckling] so if you know
any billionaires...
48
00:02:01,664 --> 00:02:04,540
Well, the only one in our town
is mr. Burns,
49
00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:05,749
And he's awful.
50
00:02:05,876 --> 00:02:08,252
Once, he clear-cut a forest
51
00:02:08,420 --> 00:02:10,754
Because he thought a squirrel
was looking at him funny.
52
00:02:10,881 --> 00:02:13,674
♪ ♪
53
00:02:13,801 --> 00:02:15,759
Montgomery burns. Mm.
54
00:02:15,803 --> 00:02:18,053
Interesting idea, lisa.
55
00:02:18,139 --> 00:02:19,972
No, I didn't say it
to be an idea!
56
00:02:20,099 --> 00:02:21,306
He's terrible.
57
00:02:21,433 --> 00:02:24,309
Whatever you do,
don't go to him.
58
00:02:24,395 --> 00:02:26,395
[narrator]
but the woman who once tried
59
00:02:26,480 --> 00:02:28,605
To clone sheryl sandberg
for a school project
60
00:02:28,691 --> 00:02:30,274
Would not be deterred.
61
00:02:33,362 --> 00:02:35,320
Welcome to orlando.
Quick heads-up.
62
00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:37,447
We may have to cut
this panel short
63
00:02:37,533 --> 00:02:39,816
Due to our third
once-in-a-million-year
64
00:02:39,910 --> 00:02:41,535
Hurricane this season.
65
00:02:41,620 --> 00:02:43,787
-[wind whistling]
-put this on my reel!
66
00:02:43,906 --> 00:02:46,540
-Terrible luck.
-No fault of anyone's.
67
00:02:46,625 --> 00:02:50,127
Mr. Burns, climate change has
left the earth in peril.
68
00:02:50,254 --> 00:02:52,880
Who sent you? John muir?
Friedrich engels?
69
00:02:53,007 --> 00:02:54,548
Mike doonesbury?
70
00:02:54,633 --> 00:02:57,092
I'm getting word that
this hurricane is meeting up
71
00:02:57,178 --> 00:02:59,386
With the everglades super fire.
72
00:03:00,389 --> 00:03:03,307
Montgomery, I'm the founder of
a desalination company.
73
00:03:03,434 --> 00:03:05,976
Our world is
running out of water,
74
00:03:06,061 --> 00:03:08,470
And we need a hero to rescue us.
75
00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:11,899
And I believe that
that hero is your money.
76
00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:14,067
[wind howling]
77
00:03:14,195 --> 00:03:16,528
We sell chemicals
that can put out that fire.
78
00:03:16,655 --> 00:03:19,489
Granted, those chemicals
turn alligators into godzillas,
79
00:03:19,575 --> 00:03:22,868
But we're working on a bomb
that can fix that.
80
00:03:22,953 --> 00:03:25,537
Sorry, miss.
Desalination is a snooze.
81
00:03:25,623 --> 00:03:28,498
But I do want in
on the godzilla bomb.
82
00:03:29,501 --> 00:03:32,127
[narrator]
persephone was not shy
about hounding mr. Burns,
83
00:03:32,254 --> 00:03:34,796
And he wasn't shy
about hounding her.
84
00:03:34,965 --> 00:03:36,215
[barking, snarling]
85
00:03:36,300 --> 00:03:38,050
Some fish just swim
with the tide.
86
00:03:38,135 --> 00:03:40,427
I'm the kind of relentless fish
87
00:03:40,554 --> 00:03:44,640
That falls down ten times
before it runs up the mountain.
88
00:03:44,767 --> 00:03:46,725
On ocean shoes.
89
00:03:48,938 --> 00:03:51,021
[whirring]
90
00:04:00,074 --> 00:04:02,783
Eh. Fine, you've got
five minutes.
91
00:04:02,868 --> 00:04:04,785
Who are these goateed wastrels?
92
00:04:04,870 --> 00:04:06,328
A documentary crew.
93
00:04:06,497 --> 00:04:10,249
Only the most paradigm-shifting
start-up ceos have them.
94
00:04:10,334 --> 00:04:14,211
Mr. Burns, I see your life
as a beautiful business opera
95
00:04:14,296 --> 00:04:17,422
And investing in lifeboat
as the climactic aria
96
00:04:17,549 --> 00:04:20,509
That will put you
in the same pantheon as getty,
97
00:04:20,636 --> 00:04:22,636
Vanderbilt, the spanx lady.
98
00:04:22,721 --> 00:04:26,515
Desalination is an expensive
and inefficient industry
99
00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:28,058
Begging to be disrupted.
100
00:04:28,185 --> 00:04:30,143
Success is a decision.
101
00:04:30,271 --> 00:04:31,937
Dare to choose it, sir.
102
00:04:32,064 --> 00:04:34,022
-Dare to.
-Of course.
103
00:04:34,149 --> 00:04:36,149
Like how I chose
to be born rich.
104
00:04:36,277 --> 00:04:39,152
Together we can disrupt
big salt water.
105
00:04:39,196 --> 00:04:41,029
You mean... The ocean?
106
00:04:41,156 --> 00:04:43,657
Exactly,
or should I say...
107
00:04:43,701 --> 00:04:45,492
[both]
excellent.
108
00:04:45,577 --> 00:04:48,078
Not only am I pledging
much of my personal wealth
109
00:04:48,163 --> 00:04:51,623
To lifeboat, but I'm giving
the company cooling tower a
110
00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:53,208
To use as its headquarters.
111
00:04:53,294 --> 00:04:56,211
Cooling tower a was
mr. Burns' favorite tower.
112
00:04:56,297 --> 00:04:59,381
He always said it held
so many precious memories.
113
00:05:01,176 --> 00:05:03,677
In addition,
all workers in sector 7-g
114
00:05:03,762 --> 00:05:05,345
Are immediately fired...
115
00:05:05,431 --> 00:05:07,514
Hey, that's me!
Screw you, pig!
116
00:05:07,683 --> 00:05:10,767
...And are rehired at
higher tech industry salaries.
117
00:05:10,853 --> 00:05:12,519
Bless you, pig!
118
00:05:12,646 --> 00:05:13,895
[narrator]
burns brought
his wealthiest friends
119
00:05:14,023 --> 00:05:15,605
Into persephone's fold.
120
00:05:15,691 --> 00:05:19,568
When I invest, I look at
the business's key fundamental:
121
00:05:19,695 --> 00:05:24,364
Am I under the delusion that
I have a shot with the ceo?
122
00:05:25,326 --> 00:05:27,075
[giggling]
123
00:05:27,202 --> 00:05:28,577
[narrator]
burns and persephone were soon
124
00:05:28,704 --> 00:05:30,746
Running the new company
side by side,
125
00:05:30,873 --> 00:05:32,414
Overseeing a start-up culture
126
00:05:32,499 --> 00:05:34,374
Where everyone had
a creative title.
127
00:05:34,460 --> 00:05:38,086
Persephone odair, founder
and status quo demolitionist.
128
00:05:38,172 --> 00:05:40,964
Montgomery burns,
chief change alchemist.
129
00:05:41,050 --> 00:05:43,216
Waylon smithers,
purposefulness warlock.
130
00:05:43,302 --> 00:05:45,719
Carl carlson,
braindump magician.
131
00:05:45,763 --> 00:05:48,013
Lenny leonard,
storytelling ninja.
132
00:05:48,057 --> 00:05:50,265
Homer simpson,
"compet-ticy" rockstar.
133
00:05:50,309 --> 00:05:51,892
[director]
competency?
134
00:05:51,935 --> 00:05:53,143
Say it again.
135
00:05:53,187 --> 00:05:54,853
If anyone can transform burns,
136
00:05:54,980 --> 00:05:56,271
It's a visionary
like persephone.
137
00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:58,482
Like, if you work at lifeboat,
you have to use
138
00:05:58,650 --> 00:05:59,983
These metal drinking straws.
139
00:06:00,110 --> 00:06:02,235
It's so easy to clean
after every use.
140
00:06:02,363 --> 00:06:03,653
[grunting]
141
00:06:03,739 --> 00:06:05,197
I'm just... [groans]
142
00:06:05,282 --> 00:06:06,740
Why does it have to bend?
143
00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:08,658
[straining]
144
00:06:08,702 --> 00:06:11,119
♪ this is my fight song ♪
145
00:06:11,205 --> 00:06:14,081
♪ take back my life song ♪
146
00:06:14,166 --> 00:06:17,376
♪ prove I'm all right song. ♪
147
00:06:17,461 --> 00:06:20,295
[grunting]
148
00:06:21,590 --> 00:06:24,424
-[cheering]
-my fellow lifeboaters!
149
00:06:24,593 --> 00:06:28,303
I'm so excited to have you
on this journey with me.
150
00:06:28,430 --> 00:06:32,474
Imagine a world with an endless
supply of drinkable water.
151
00:06:32,601 --> 00:06:36,103
A world where every hotel towel
can be used once
152
00:06:36,230 --> 00:06:39,815
And then dropped on the floor.
153
00:06:39,900 --> 00:06:41,817
Oh, there are a lot of changes.
154
00:06:41,944 --> 00:06:43,276
Unlike when this was
a nuclear plant,
155
00:06:43,362 --> 00:06:45,404
Security's super tight now,
156
00:06:45,531 --> 00:06:48,031
And we have to sign
stringent ndas.
157
00:06:48,158 --> 00:06:50,617
And I am bad at keeping secrets.
158
00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:53,036
Like how I'm not supposed to
talk about lenny's crush
159
00:06:53,122 --> 00:06:54,871
-On his italian tutor.
-Homer.
160
00:06:54,915 --> 00:06:56,873
[speaking italian]
161
00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:58,542
[narrator]
lifeboat was soaring,
162
00:06:58,669 --> 00:07:00,627
But no one could've predicted
what shocking turn
163
00:07:00,754 --> 00:07:02,587
Was in store for the company.
164
00:07:02,756 --> 00:07:04,297
Um, is this one of
those documentaries
165
00:07:04,425 --> 00:07:06,466
Where I'm not supposed to
look at the camera?
166
00:07:06,552 --> 00:07:09,261
Or is it like the office,
where I always look at it
167
00:07:09,388 --> 00:07:11,638
And do a big take
so the audience knows
168
00:07:11,723 --> 00:07:13,598
When to laugh?
169
00:07:15,644 --> 00:07:18,895
In richness and wealth,
for richer and richer,
170
00:07:18,981 --> 00:07:22,983
I now pronounce you
husband and wife.
171
00:07:31,660 --> 00:07:32,826
I'm still pinching myself.
172
00:07:32,995 --> 00:07:35,871
I'm married to montgomery burns.
173
00:07:35,998 --> 00:07:37,998
Nuclear industry legend.
174
00:07:38,125 --> 00:07:40,375
Chief s'more toaster
at the bohemian grove.
175
00:07:40,502 --> 00:07:42,377
The first man
with no blood type.
176
00:07:42,504 --> 00:07:44,671
What a joy
to wake up in the morning,
177
00:07:44,756 --> 00:07:45,964
Turn my head on the pillow
178
00:07:46,049 --> 00:07:47,883
And see her bedroom door
through the glass
179
00:07:47,968 --> 00:07:50,051
Of my hyperbaric chamber.
180
00:07:50,095 --> 00:07:54,306
[narrator]
soon, persephone and burns were
the new it power couple.
181
00:07:59,104 --> 00:08:01,271
And the press couldn't get
enough of this may...
182
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:04,015
Last-minute-of-December romance.
183
00:08:04,026 --> 00:08:06,151
It's so refreshing
to see a young person
184
00:08:06,195 --> 00:08:07,652
With the world at her feet
185
00:08:07,779 --> 00:08:11,448
Who also sees the glory
that is montgomery burns.
186
00:08:11,533 --> 00:08:14,159
[slurping]
187
00:08:16,830 --> 00:08:19,039
[slurping continues]
188
00:08:22,419 --> 00:08:24,085
[narrator]
now it was up to persephone
189
00:08:24,254 --> 00:08:25,837
To create a working prototype of
190
00:08:25,923 --> 00:08:28,006
Her amazing
desalination technology.
191
00:08:28,050 --> 00:08:29,925
The water in front of you
comes from
192
00:08:29,968 --> 00:08:31,843
The functional prototype of
193
00:08:31,929 --> 00:08:33,970
The lifeboat
desalination machine.
194
00:08:34,014 --> 00:08:35,639
So everyone please raise a glass
195
00:08:35,682 --> 00:08:38,725
To milestone
this history-defining moment.
196
00:08:39,728 --> 00:08:41,394
[overlapping chatter]
197
00:08:41,522 --> 00:08:43,522
Oh, no, you can't
drink it now. No.
198
00:08:43,649 --> 00:08:46,566
Our competitors could steal
the proprietary aquatech
199
00:08:46,610 --> 00:08:47,692
In your urine.
200
00:08:47,736 --> 00:08:49,819
[overlapping chatter]
201
00:08:49,947 --> 00:08:52,822
And just in case any of
our patented evaporated mist
202
00:08:52,866 --> 00:08:54,241
Made it into your bladders,
203
00:08:54,368 --> 00:08:57,277
We've arranged to have you all
catheterized.
204
00:08:57,412 --> 00:08:59,204
[overlapping excited chatter]
205
00:08:59,331 --> 00:09:01,206
[whirring]
206
00:09:01,250 --> 00:09:04,209
So lifeboat was just following
the tech industry playbook:
207
00:09:04,294 --> 00:09:06,169
Fake it till you make it.
208
00:09:06,255 --> 00:09:09,256
Or as I call it,
"lie-po until you ipo."
209
00:09:09,299 --> 00:09:12,676
But the employees were already
dreaming of cashing out.
210
00:09:12,761 --> 00:09:14,594
Tech salaries are the greatest.
211
00:09:14,721 --> 00:09:17,097
This week, I gave marge
200 stock options
212
00:09:17,140 --> 00:09:18,723
To go grocery shopping.
213
00:09:18,809 --> 00:09:20,016
It didn't work at all.
214
00:09:20,143 --> 00:09:22,852
I had to put all the food
back on the shelves.
215
00:09:23,021 --> 00:09:24,813
[narrator] meanwhile,
the newly minted tech workers
216
00:09:24,856 --> 00:09:28,108
Were adapting to a much
different corporate culture.
217
00:09:28,193 --> 00:09:30,860
At the new company,
people were so secretive
218
00:09:30,988 --> 00:09:33,572
They actually moved the post-it
notes with their passwords
219
00:09:33,657 --> 00:09:35,198
Off their monitor.
220
00:09:38,236 --> 00:09:40,704
Workers were getting fired
every day.
221
00:09:40,831 --> 00:09:44,291
That tattoo is the intellectual
property of the company.
222
00:09:44,376 --> 00:09:45,625
[buzzing]
223
00:09:46,837 --> 00:09:49,838
The whole company got
so paranoid.
224
00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:51,923
Because of those ndas he signed,
225
00:09:52,009 --> 00:09:55,093
Homer couldn't even tell me
how his day was.
226
00:09:55,262 --> 00:09:57,220
I can neither confirm nor deny
I had a day.
227
00:09:57,306 --> 00:09:59,764
Well, it was strange
they wouldn't let me
228
00:09:59,808 --> 00:10:02,517
Look inside the machines,
since my title was
229
00:10:02,603 --> 00:10:06,271
Chief engineer of
inside the machine.
230
00:10:06,398 --> 00:10:08,189
And whenever a reporter came by,
231
00:10:08,317 --> 00:10:11,985
It seemed like they were trying
to cover something up.
232
00:10:12,112 --> 00:10:16,072
Well, still better than working
for zuckerberg!
233
00:10:16,158 --> 00:10:19,659
They were hiding something, and
it was really freaking me out.
234
00:10:19,703 --> 00:10:21,077
So I emailed persephone.
235
00:10:21,163 --> 00:10:23,496
And the next day, carl was gone.
236
00:10:31,498 --> 00:10:33,840
[narrator]
despite the red flags flying
from this lifeboat,
237
00:10:33,967 --> 00:10:35,842
There continued to be believers.
238
00:10:35,927 --> 00:10:38,553
Persephone dominates
my vision board.
239
00:10:38,639 --> 00:10:40,555
Sure, she married mr. Burns,
240
00:10:40,641 --> 00:10:43,224
But as ceo,
a woman had all the power.
241
00:10:43,310 --> 00:10:46,394
That's what made
the internet trolls so mad.
242
00:10:46,521 --> 00:10:49,189
[narrator]
all the online negativity
stirred up
243
00:10:49,274 --> 00:10:52,484
The finger-tempted anger of
a different kind of troll.
244
00:10:52,569 --> 00:10:53,735
Hmm.
245
00:10:53,862 --> 00:10:56,154
♪ this is my fight song ♪
246
00:10:56,239 --> 00:10:59,115
♪ take back my life song... ♪
247
00:10:59,201 --> 00:11:01,743
I wanted to give my wife--
wow, wife,
248
00:11:01,870 --> 00:11:03,078
Still getting used to
saying that--
249
00:11:03,163 --> 00:11:05,955
A little something special
for her birthday.
250
00:11:06,041 --> 00:11:07,624
A twitter gift card?
251
00:11:07,751 --> 00:11:09,709
No. I bought you twitter.
252
00:11:09,795 --> 00:11:12,453
The whole company.
It was a bargain.
253
00:11:12,547 --> 00:11:13,963
The previous owner
had to sell it
254
00:11:14,132 --> 00:11:15,799
After his self-driving
mars rocket
255
00:11:15,967 --> 00:11:18,343
Crashed into the international
space station.
256
00:11:18,387 --> 00:11:20,095
Oh! Mm.
257
00:11:20,180 --> 00:11:21,471
Mr. Burns, you deleted
258
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:23,390
All negative tweets
about persephone.
259
00:11:23,475 --> 00:11:25,809
Is that evidence that
you're in a kind of cult
260
00:11:25,977 --> 00:11:28,103
And won't hear any criticism
of your leader?
261
00:11:28,188 --> 00:11:30,146
Yes, I am in a cult.
262
00:11:30,232 --> 00:11:32,273
It's called a marriage.
[laughs]
263
00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:35,235
My wife is the head of it,
and my job is to support her.
264
00:11:35,278 --> 00:11:38,154
Now, maybe you're the cult
leader in your marriage, andrew,
265
00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:40,990
But I know pilar,
and I suspect she'd disagree.
266
00:11:41,109 --> 00:11:43,743
[laughter]
267
00:11:43,829 --> 00:11:46,413
[narrator] but lifeboat
was rocked by a fresh scandal,
268
00:11:46,540 --> 00:11:48,957
When an anonymous whistleblower
bravely came forward
269
00:11:49,042 --> 00:11:50,917
With damning new information.
270
00:11:51,002 --> 00:11:52,711
[distorted voice] my best friend
carl was abducted
271
00:11:52,796 --> 00:11:54,337
Because he was about
to go public
272
00:11:54,464 --> 00:11:56,548
With a story that
would destroy this company.
273
00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:58,258
People need to know the truth.
274
00:11:58,301 --> 00:12:00,260
The lifeboat machine
doesn't work.
275
00:12:00,387 --> 00:12:03,471
[narrator]
the whistle was blown
and the damage was done.
276
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:12,105
Ma'am, ma'am,
the whistleblower claims
277
00:12:12,190 --> 00:12:13,273
The only person who has seen
278
00:12:13,400 --> 00:12:15,442
The inside of
your desalination machine
279
00:12:15,485 --> 00:12:16,484
Has disappeared.
280
00:12:16,570 --> 00:12:17,527
Isn't that suspicious?
281
00:12:17,696 --> 00:12:19,362
Why do you doubt a female ceo
282
00:12:19,406 --> 00:12:20,989
But believe
the silhouette of a man
283
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,282
Sitting in the dark?
284
00:12:22,451 --> 00:12:25,702
News flash!
Women have faces now.
285
00:12:25,829 --> 00:12:27,120
[narrator]
at this moment,
286
00:12:27,205 --> 00:12:28,663
Allegations that
its core technology
287
00:12:28,749 --> 00:12:32,083
Does not work are threatening
lifeboat's very survival.
288
00:12:32,252 --> 00:12:34,127
-[thunder rumbles]
-is this the beginning
of the end
289
00:12:34,171 --> 00:12:36,254
For this
once-promising start-up?
290
00:12:36,298 --> 00:12:37,797
[female narrator]
and the answer is...
291
00:12:37,841 --> 00:12:39,174
Absolutely not.
292
00:12:39,217 --> 00:12:40,967
Lifeboat will save humanity
293
00:12:41,136 --> 00:12:43,511
And become the world's
most profitable company.
294
00:12:43,638 --> 00:12:46,139
Join us next time
for lifeboat afloat,
295
00:12:46,183 --> 00:12:48,516
Persephone's total vindication.
296
00:12:48,602 --> 00:12:52,479
[burns] this documentary series
is now a burnsco production.
297
00:12:57,319 --> 00:12:58,860
Montgomery burns wasn't happy
298
00:12:58,904 --> 00:13:00,195
With the documentary
299
00:13:00,280 --> 00:13:01,905
About his wife's start-up,
so he bought the company
300
00:13:02,032 --> 00:13:03,406
That made it,
but that didn't stop others
301
00:13:03,533 --> 00:13:06,075
From telling the story,
because the business of
302
00:13:06,244 --> 00:13:09,329
Business documentaries is
big business.
303
00:13:11,374 --> 00:13:13,500
We've unearthed even more
never-before-seen footage
304
00:13:13,585 --> 00:13:15,835
Of the beatles,
including six hours
305
00:13:15,921 --> 00:13:17,712
Of them
discussing drinking water.
306
00:13:17,798 --> 00:13:21,090
The thing about water,
you can't make tea without it.
307
00:13:21,218 --> 00:13:23,176
What if you made tea
out of coffee?
308
00:13:23,261 --> 00:13:25,345
What if you made coffee
out of tea?
309
00:13:25,430 --> 00:13:27,597
Uh, fellas, maybe
we should play some music.
310
00:13:27,641 --> 00:13:30,850
[sips] why do they call it h2o?
311
00:13:30,977 --> 00:13:32,977
I bet no reason at all.
312
00:13:34,648 --> 00:13:37,190
[narrator]
just weeks ago,
lifeboat stopped payment
313
00:13:37,275 --> 00:13:39,442
On their stadium naming rights.
314
00:13:46,326 --> 00:13:48,117
Despite the glut of
lifeboat documentaries,
315
00:13:48,245 --> 00:13:51,412
The definitive version was made
by a storyteller so compelling,
316
00:13:51,456 --> 00:13:55,166
He made 12 hours on
the national parks feel like 11.
317
00:13:55,293 --> 00:13:57,585
♪ ♪
318
00:14:11,393 --> 00:14:13,393
[peter coyote]
the mysterious whistleblower
alleged that
319
00:14:13,562 --> 00:14:16,980
Persephone's desalination
machine was fraudulent.
320
00:14:17,065 --> 00:14:19,190
[distorted voice] the lifeboat
machine doesn't work.
321
00:14:19,276 --> 00:14:20,650
[peter coyote]
unfortunately for him,
322
00:14:20,735 --> 00:14:23,903
Mr. Burns' legal team had
acquired the raw footage
323
00:14:24,030 --> 00:14:27,240
Of the whistleblower's
damning interview.
324
00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:29,868
[distorted voice]
the machine doesn't work.
325
00:14:29,953 --> 00:14:31,911
Hey, I ordered this sub toasted.
326
00:14:31,997 --> 00:14:33,413
This is only lightly toasted.
327
00:14:33,498 --> 00:14:35,582
[normal voice] is this
how you treat a whistleblower?
328
00:14:35,667 --> 00:14:37,000
Uh-oh.
329
00:14:37,168 --> 00:14:39,168
[peter coyote]
mr. Burns and persephone
now knew
330
00:14:39,296 --> 00:14:41,796
The identity of
the man who betrayed them.
331
00:14:41,840 --> 00:14:44,966
And the hiring of lawyers
to destroy homer simpson
332
00:14:45,135 --> 00:14:48,303
Proved to be quite
the aphrodisiac.
333
00:14:48,388 --> 00:14:51,764
[both moaning]
334
00:14:51,892 --> 00:14:53,182
[peter coyote]
lifeboat lawyers were relentless
335
00:14:53,268 --> 00:14:55,226
-In trying to subpoena homer...
-[screams]
336
00:14:55,312 --> 00:14:58,229
...And sue him for breaking
his nda.
337
00:15:04,070 --> 00:15:05,862
[lisa]
my dad got an anonymous message
338
00:15:05,947 --> 00:15:07,864
Saying there was something
he had to see,
339
00:15:07,949 --> 00:15:09,115
So I went with him.
340
00:15:09,200 --> 00:15:10,575
What I saw changed
341
00:15:10,702 --> 00:15:13,620
The one thing I thought
could never be changed--
342
00:15:13,747 --> 00:15:15,204
My mind.
343
00:15:21,504 --> 00:15:24,297
[gasps] carl.
You sent the message.
344
00:15:24,341 --> 00:15:27,175
You've been working in the lab
all along?
345
00:15:29,721 --> 00:15:31,262
If I didn't do their dirty work,
346
00:15:31,306 --> 00:15:33,389
They'd tell the world
my dark secret.
347
00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:35,975
I've been to 700
jimmy buffet concerts!
348
00:15:36,061 --> 00:15:37,602
I'm a parrot-head.
349
00:15:37,729 --> 00:15:40,188
"cheeseburger in paradise"!
350
00:15:40,315 --> 00:15:41,898
[lisa]
so, what are they making you do?
351
00:15:42,025 --> 00:15:44,567
I'm putting something
in the lifeboat machines
352
00:15:44,694 --> 00:15:46,611
Called "jab-a-tose."
353
00:15:46,696 --> 00:15:48,488
Well, if I may frink-splain.
354
00:15:48,531 --> 00:15:49,781
In 1970,
355
00:15:49,866 --> 00:15:52,825
A very popular diet soda
called jab
356
00:15:52,953 --> 00:15:56,663
Was discontinued because
of the overpowering sweetness
357
00:15:56,748 --> 00:15:58,331
Of its artificial flavor.
358
00:15:59,334 --> 00:16:03,628
Lifeboat bought up thousands of
cases of unsold jab sodas
359
00:16:03,672 --> 00:16:06,756
Because jab-a-tose was so strong
360
00:16:06,883 --> 00:16:09,717
It could completely mask
the taste of salt.
361
00:16:09,844 --> 00:16:13,096
Oh, my god. This machine
doesn't take out the salt.
362
00:16:13,181 --> 00:16:15,890
It masks it with sweetness!
363
00:16:15,976 --> 00:16:17,892
That's the jab-a-tose.
364
00:16:18,061 --> 00:16:19,978
Ocean water enters the machine,
365
00:16:20,063 --> 00:16:22,105
And when it comes out,
it tastes normal
366
00:16:22,190 --> 00:16:24,857
But still has more salt
than all the glasses
367
00:16:24,985 --> 00:16:26,109
In margaritaville.
368
00:16:26,236 --> 00:16:28,903
Oh, my god.
Lifeboat is built on a lie,
369
00:16:28,989 --> 00:16:31,114
And persephone is a fraud.
370
00:16:31,241 --> 00:16:32,949
But her merch is...
371
00:16:33,159 --> 00:16:34,409
[sniffles] solid.
372
00:16:34,494 --> 00:16:35,994
[peter coyote]
action was needed,
373
00:16:36,121 --> 00:16:38,705
And island time was running out.
374
00:16:38,790 --> 00:16:40,248
The fateful demo day had arrived
375
00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:42,834
For lifeboat to
finally prove its concept
376
00:16:42,919 --> 00:16:44,752
At springfield elementary.
377
00:16:44,796 --> 00:16:47,171
The school's drinking water
had been replaced
378
00:16:47,298 --> 00:16:48,840
With lifeboat liquid--
379
00:16:48,883 --> 00:16:51,300
Jab-a-tose-infused salt water.
380
00:16:51,344 --> 00:16:54,595
Lifeboat employees had drunk
the kool-aid,
381
00:16:54,723 --> 00:16:57,473
And now it was being served up
to the children.
382
00:16:57,600 --> 00:16:58,558
Mr. Burns!
383
00:16:58,727 --> 00:17:00,059
The lifeboat water isn't safe.
384
00:17:00,145 --> 00:17:02,437
It's just super sweetened
ocean brine.
385
00:17:02,564 --> 00:17:05,398
Nonsense.
My wife is a beautiful genius,
386
00:17:05,567 --> 00:17:07,400
Who succeeds at
everything she touches.
387
00:17:07,527 --> 00:17:10,028
And everything she says
makes perfect sense.
388
00:17:10,113 --> 00:17:13,364
The wheel of tomorrow is
an aqua-circle.
389
00:17:13,533 --> 00:17:15,074
Let's make it rain.
390
00:17:15,243 --> 00:17:16,576
-[cheering]
-buddy, buddy, buddy.
391
00:17:16,661 --> 00:17:19,704
What you're feeling towards
that lady is fresh love,
392
00:17:19,831 --> 00:17:20,872
Not married love.
393
00:17:20,957 --> 00:17:22,206
But we are married.
394
00:17:22,333 --> 00:17:25,168
Yes, but the married love
hasn't kicked in yet.
395
00:17:25,295 --> 00:17:27,962
When it does, you'll see
your spouse's flaws
396
00:17:28,048 --> 00:17:31,674
In 4k hdtv
you can never turn off.
397
00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:33,259
What are you driving at?
398
00:17:33,303 --> 00:17:36,846
I think you need to look at
your wife with marriage eyes.
399
00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:38,264
Water is the original crypto.
400
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:41,100
Every drop is encoded
on the biological blockchain,
401
00:17:41,227 --> 00:17:44,729
And we are the aquanauts
of the potable future.
402
00:17:44,773 --> 00:17:47,148
This is wet 3.0!
403
00:17:47,192 --> 00:17:51,018
I don't understand
a thing she's ever said.
404
00:17:51,112 --> 00:17:53,112
Now you're married.
405
00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:55,406
And since you're seeing things
clearly...
406
00:17:56,701 --> 00:17:59,744
Oh, dear. Those children are
going to drink poison.
407
00:17:59,829 --> 00:18:01,454
And the bad news is...
408
00:18:01,539 --> 00:18:02,997
I'm going to be liable.
409
00:18:03,166 --> 00:18:05,208
[echoing]
liable!
410
00:18:09,339 --> 00:18:10,505
[gasping]
411
00:18:10,673 --> 00:18:12,340
[peter coyote]
that is what would have happened
412
00:18:12,467 --> 00:18:15,384
Had homer not
turned the valve off.
413
00:18:17,806 --> 00:18:20,598
Sorry, we only put that in there
for the trailer.
414
00:18:20,725 --> 00:18:22,725
Do you know how hard it is
to get people to watch
415
00:18:22,852 --> 00:18:26,104
A documentary that's not about
a small-town murder?
416
00:18:26,189 --> 00:18:27,647
Please, honey, come clean.
417
00:18:27,732 --> 00:18:30,233
Your miracle invention is
nothing but claptrap.
418
00:18:30,276 --> 00:18:33,528
If you can just admit that,
maybe we have a chance.
419
00:18:33,613 --> 00:18:37,782
Babe, the underlying imaginary
technology still works.
420
00:18:37,867 --> 00:18:39,283
[peter coyote]
and in that moment,
421
00:18:39,327 --> 00:18:43,454
This unlikely and super gross
love affair died.
422
00:18:43,540 --> 00:18:47,583
Yes, I was besotted,
blind to her machinations.
423
00:18:47,710 --> 00:18:49,210
She cost me billions.
424
00:18:49,337 --> 00:18:51,170
It wasn't that she was evil,
I love evil.
425
00:18:51,297 --> 00:18:54,257
It's that she still insists
she's good.
426
00:18:55,718 --> 00:18:58,177
[peter coyote]
lifeboat had finally
hit the reef,
427
00:18:58,263 --> 00:19:00,388
Drowning its investors
and employees
428
00:19:00,431 --> 00:19:03,850
In poisoned water and
counterparty risk lawsuits.
429
00:19:03,935 --> 00:19:06,435
But to this day,
persephone has refused
430
00:19:06,604 --> 00:19:08,271
To admit any failure.
431
00:19:08,314 --> 00:19:11,524
Testing showed your de-salinator
did absolutely nothing,
432
00:19:11,609 --> 00:19:14,277
Your company is bankrupt,
and in the divorce,
433
00:19:14,445 --> 00:19:17,363
Mr. Burns somehow got
your high school friends.
434
00:19:20,618 --> 00:19:22,034
What happens from here?
435
00:19:22,120 --> 00:19:23,494
Well, christiane amanpour,
as you say,
436
00:19:23,580 --> 00:19:25,663
Things have never
looked better for the company.
437
00:19:25,748 --> 00:19:26,706
I didn't say that.
438
00:19:26,875 --> 00:19:28,040
The reality is,
439
00:19:28,168 --> 00:19:30,251
-You're in jail.
-[heavy door closes]
440
00:19:30,336 --> 00:19:32,003
Christiane,
have I ever told you about
441
00:19:32,046 --> 00:19:35,298
My grandfather's experience
on a lifeboat?
442
00:19:36,134 --> 00:19:37,383
Even that was a lie.
443
00:19:37,543 --> 00:19:39,177
Her grandfather wasn't
in the war,
444
00:19:39,262 --> 00:19:40,553
And he didn't die on a lifeboat.
445
00:19:40,680 --> 00:19:43,890
He's a cpa whose hobby is
fixing british spellings
446
00:19:44,017 --> 00:19:45,600
On wikipedia.
447
00:19:51,107 --> 00:19:52,440
[sighs] not only did I miss out
448
00:19:52,567 --> 00:19:54,525
On once-in-a-lifetime
start-up riches,
449
00:19:54,611 --> 00:19:56,944
But I lost the most amazing
woman I ever met.
450
00:19:56,988 --> 00:20:00,239
I think, in a few more months
she might've even slept with me.
451
00:20:00,366 --> 00:20:01,657
It's great to meet you in person
452
00:20:01,784 --> 00:20:04,827
After seeing so much footage
of you in our documentary
453
00:20:04,913 --> 00:20:07,496
The man who sold
horse meat sandwiches.
454
00:20:09,667 --> 00:20:10,708
Anything else to add?
455
00:20:10,877 --> 00:20:11,751
Just this.
456
00:20:11,878 --> 00:20:13,211
Don't feel sorry for me.
457
00:20:13,296 --> 00:20:15,254
Time to rebuild and reconquer.
458
00:20:15,381 --> 00:20:17,882
If I know one thing
about myself,
459
00:20:18,009 --> 00:20:21,594
Montgomery burns always
bounces back.
460
00:20:26,267 --> 00:20:29,101
♪ this is my fight song ♪
461
00:20:29,145 --> 00:20:31,896
♪ take back my life song ♪
462
00:20:31,981 --> 00:20:37,151
-[crying]
-♪ prove I'm all right song ♪
463
00:20:37,195 --> 00:20:39,695
♪ my power's turned on ♪
464
00:20:39,739 --> 00:20:42,031
♪ starting right now
I'll be strong ♪
465
00:20:42,200 --> 00:20:44,700
♪ I'll play my fight song. ♪
466
00:20:48,081 --> 00:20:51,332
We also have over 90 hours of
them talking about umbrellas.
467
00:20:51,334 --> 00:20:52,875
Maybe that could be
a documentary, too.
468
00:20:53,628 --> 00:20:56,128
I once brought an umbrella
into the shower.
469
00:20:56,214 --> 00:20:58,214
-How did you get clean?
-I didn't,
470
00:20:58,299 --> 00:21:01,384
But at least I didn't
have to take off my clothes.
471
00:21:01,552 --> 00:21:04,720
As soon as I open my umbrella,
it stops raining.
472
00:21:04,764 --> 00:21:06,389
You need a sunroof on it.
473
00:21:06,516 --> 00:21:09,517
What about a giant umbrella
you keep in the trunk?
474
00:21:09,644 --> 00:21:13,479
Sounds like you're talking about
an "umbrellaphant."
475
00:21:13,523 --> 00:21:15,273
Can we get back to work?
476
00:21:15,316 --> 00:21:17,316
Wait. I like the sound of that.
477
00:21:17,402 --> 00:21:18,401
Get back.
478
00:21:18,486 --> 00:21:20,528
I saw an umbrellaphant
at the circus.
479
00:21:20,655 --> 00:21:22,488
He was working for peanuts.
480
00:21:22,532 --> 00:21:24,740
Captioning sponsored by
20th century fox television
481
00:21:24,784 --> 00:21:26,617
And fox broadcasting company
482
00:21:26,703 --> 00:21:28,536
And toyota.
483
00:21:28,621 --> 00:21:30,204
Captioned by
media access group at wgbh
access.Wgbh.Org
484
00:21:31,249 --> 00:21:32,498
Shh!