1 00:00:00,001 --> 00:00:06,387 Sync and corrections by btsix www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:06,388 --> 00:00:08,222 Thanks for hosting. 3 00:00:08,223 --> 00:00:09,798 How was the sleepover? 4 00:00:09,799 --> 00:00:13,060 They each had a 5-Hour Energy drink and a jar of Nutella 5 00:00:13,061 --> 00:00:16,346 and then watched Russian dashcam videos all night. 6 00:00:16,347 --> 00:00:18,399 Vodit' znachit ubivat'! 7 00:00:18,400 --> 00:00:20,067 Listen, Marge. 8 00:00:20,068 --> 00:00:23,070 Every year, Kirk and I rent a luxury villa in Costa Rica 9 00:00:23,071 --> 00:00:26,573 and invite a few select families to join us. (chuckles) 10 00:00:26,574 --> 00:00:28,666 Maybe you've heard about it? 11 00:00:28,667 --> 00:00:31,862 MARGE: I've always dreamed of being invited on this trip, 12 00:00:31,863 --> 00:00:34,081 and now it's about to happen. 13 00:00:34,082 --> 00:00:37,284 Play it cool, Marge, like only you can. 14 00:00:37,285 --> 00:00:38,994 Let me see. 15 00:00:38,995 --> 00:00:40,662 Um... (smacking lips) 16 00:00:40,663 --> 00:00:42,998 Costa Rica... 17 00:00:42,999 --> 00:00:43,999 Nope, nope. 18 00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:46,018 (popping lips) 19 00:00:46,019 --> 00:00:48,503 Sorry, it's news to me. 20 00:00:48,504 --> 00:00:50,380 We were wondering, would your family 21 00:00:50,381 --> 00:00:52,132 be interested in joining us? 22 00:00:52,133 --> 00:00:53,934 When would you need an answer by? 23 00:00:53,935 --> 00:00:55,719 Oh, the sooner the better. 24 00:00:55,720 --> 00:00:58,013 (tires screeching) 25 00:00:58,014 --> 00:00:59,556 MARGE: Costa Rica! 26 00:00:59,557 --> 00:01:01,558 Costa Rica! 27 00:01:01,559 --> 00:01:03,665 Time to rock and... 28 00:01:03,666 --> 00:01:04,703 MARGE: Costa Rica! 29 00:01:04,704 --> 00:01:06,354 Whee...! 30 00:01:06,355 --> 00:01:08,023 MARGE (chanting): Costa Rica! Costa Rica! 31 00:01:08,024 --> 00:01:08,963 Costa Rica...! 32 00:01:08,964 --> 00:01:10,709 - (tires screech) - Costa Rica. 33 00:01:10,710 --> 00:01:12,360 Family meeting! 34 00:01:12,361 --> 00:01:14,003 Right now! 35 00:01:15,882 --> 00:01:17,124 (woozy groaning) 36 00:01:17,125 --> 00:01:18,200 Mwah! 37 00:01:18,201 --> 00:01:20,076 The Van Houtens invited us 38 00:01:20,077 --> 00:01:22,913 on their super-exclusive multi-family vacation 39 00:01:22,914 --> 00:01:24,750 to Costa Rica! 40 00:01:24,751 --> 00:01:27,876 We'll stay in a luxury villa right on the beach... 41 00:01:27,877 --> 00:01:28,877 Whoo-hoo! 42 00:01:28,878 --> 00:01:31,063 ...near pristine rain forests, 43 00:01:31,064 --> 00:01:34,216 home to five percent of the species on Earth... 44 00:01:34,217 --> 00:01:36,282 Biodiversity! 45 00:01:36,283 --> 00:01:40,052 ...in a land where it's normal for kids to carry machetes. 46 00:01:40,053 --> 00:01:41,232 Legalize it! 47 00:01:41,233 --> 00:01:43,934 And you can chew on the guidebook. 48 00:01:43,935 --> 00:01:46,820 I've always dreamed of being the kind of family 49 00:01:46,821 --> 00:01:50,417 that other families would be willing to do things with. 50 00:01:50,418 --> 00:01:52,444 BART AND LISA (chanting): Costa Rica! 51 00:01:52,445 --> 00:01:54,328 - Costa Rica! - Airport food court! 52 00:01:54,329 --> 00:01:56,713 - Airport food court! - Costa Rica! 53 00:01:59,408 --> 00:02:01,076 Whoa. 54 00:02:01,077 --> 00:02:04,971 Now, that's a tympanic membrane that just won't quit. 55 00:02:06,433 --> 00:02:09,084 HOMER: Whoa. This trip's gonna cost how much? 56 00:02:09,085 --> 00:02:10,752 MARGE: I know it's expensive, 57 00:02:10,753 --> 00:02:13,463 but we spend our whole lives worrying about money. 58 00:02:13,464 --> 00:02:15,774 That's because we don't have that much. 59 00:02:15,775 --> 00:02:18,093 We have a mortgage, a reverse mortgage. 60 00:02:18,094 --> 00:02:20,450 I think the house is owned by the car. 61 00:02:20,451 --> 00:02:22,973 Life is about experiences. 62 00:02:22,974 --> 00:02:26,268 Look at this photo the Hibberts posted from last year's trip. 63 00:02:26,269 --> 00:02:28,270 Now look at my feed. 64 00:02:28,271 --> 00:02:29,646 Yeah. 65 00:02:29,647 --> 00:02:31,024 Oh, boy. 66 00:02:31,025 --> 00:02:34,949 I want a photo of you and me by that waterfall. 67 00:02:34,950 --> 00:02:37,946 The hope of going on this trip is the only reason 68 00:02:37,947 --> 00:02:41,402 I've allowed Bart to stay friends with Milhouse. 69 00:02:41,403 --> 00:02:44,119 Now I understand everything. 70 00:02:44,120 --> 00:02:46,121 MARGE: Homie, I know it's a stretch, 71 00:02:46,122 --> 00:02:48,474 but if Kirk and Luann can afford it... 72 00:02:48,475 --> 00:02:50,717 Yeah. He can't earn that much. 73 00:02:50,718 --> 00:02:53,003 His job is moving the Topless Maids van 74 00:02:53,004 --> 00:02:55,323 so they don't get parking tickets. 75 00:02:55,324 --> 00:02:59,252 Let's have one damn fling and hope everything will be okay. 76 00:02:59,253 --> 00:03:01,331 You know what? You are right. 77 00:03:01,332 --> 00:03:03,391 I am sick of being the responsible one 78 00:03:03,392 --> 00:03:04,598 in this marriage. 79 00:03:04,599 --> 00:03:05,899 Let's live life. 80 00:03:05,900 --> 00:03:08,245 Remember, we can never be poor 81 00:03:08,246 --> 00:03:10,478 as long as we have each other. 82 00:03:10,479 --> 00:03:11,541 (both sigh) 83 00:03:11,542 --> 00:03:14,082 (groaning): Oh... yes, we can. 84 00:03:17,745 --> 00:03:19,672 You know, what if we stayed home 85 00:03:19,673 --> 00:03:21,823 and just did puzzles of Costa Rica? 86 00:03:21,824 --> 00:03:25,252 I mean, this trip sounds really expensive. 87 00:03:25,253 --> 00:03:27,921 - No, not really. - What? No! 88 00:03:27,922 --> 00:03:32,000 You just let the grown-ups worry about grown-up things, okay? 89 00:03:32,001 --> 00:03:34,169 (chuckles) Your mom and dad 90 00:03:34,170 --> 00:03:37,605 have our financial future all under control. 91 00:03:38,883 --> 00:03:40,008 (tires squeal) 92 00:03:40,009 --> 00:03:41,468 Ooh! Free ticket! 93 00:03:41,469 --> 00:03:43,270 The rich get richer! 94 00:03:43,271 --> 00:03:45,113 (groans) 95 00:03:46,557 --> 00:03:48,367 Ah, the multi-family vacation. 96 00:03:48,368 --> 00:03:49,868 Let's see who we've got. 97 00:03:49,869 --> 00:03:51,945 The Van Houtens, of course. The Hibberts. 98 00:03:51,946 --> 00:03:54,898 Superintendent Chalmers and his daughter. 99 00:03:54,899 --> 00:03:56,875 I can't believe my father is tearing us apart 100 00:03:56,876 --> 00:03:58,785 for a whole week. 101 00:03:58,786 --> 00:04:00,546 Sweetie, it's a very long flight. 102 00:04:00,547 --> 00:04:02,530 Why don't you save your phone battery. 103 00:04:02,531 --> 00:04:04,964 All you care about is batteries! 104 00:04:04,965 --> 00:04:06,701 You've never been in love. 105 00:04:06,702 --> 00:04:08,745 Your mother and I had a very... 106 00:04:08,746 --> 00:04:10,556 (sighs) Never mind. 107 00:04:10,557 --> 00:04:12,057 Yep, not one person here 108 00:04:12,058 --> 00:04:15,394 I'd mind spending an extended period of time with. 109 00:04:15,395 --> 00:04:18,880 I didn't have time to wax, so I'll do it on the plane. 110 00:04:18,881 --> 00:04:20,140 (Homer gasps) 111 00:04:20,141 --> 00:04:22,926 What the hell is that doing here? 112 00:04:22,927 --> 00:04:25,428 Well, Lou the cop and his sister were gonna go, 113 00:04:25,429 --> 00:04:26,980 but a billboard fell on him 114 00:04:26,981 --> 00:04:29,599 and her wind chime store burned down. 115 00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:32,578 So I suggested Patty and her new girlfriend. 116 00:04:32,579 --> 00:04:34,580 You deliberately hid this from me 117 00:04:34,581 --> 00:04:36,490 until it was too late to back out. 118 00:04:36,491 --> 00:04:38,775 - Yes. - Don't try to deny it. 119 00:04:38,776 --> 00:04:40,402 (Patty and Evelyn moan) 120 00:04:40,403 --> 00:04:43,666 Patty's new relationship really has to work out, 121 00:04:43,667 --> 00:04:46,431 because the dating apps won't take her anymore. 122 00:04:46,432 --> 00:04:49,169 All I ask is that you're nice to them. 123 00:04:49,170 --> 00:04:51,996 Evelyn, this is my husband Homer. 124 00:04:51,997 --> 00:04:53,840 A very polite hello to you, madam. 125 00:04:53,841 --> 00:04:55,917 Well, well, Homer Simpson. 126 00:04:55,918 --> 00:04:58,395 I've heard so much about you. 127 00:04:58,396 --> 00:05:00,501 Surely you have, but in my defense, 128 00:05:00,502 --> 00:05:03,183 urinating on a privately owned merry-go-round 129 00:05:03,184 --> 00:05:05,540 is not public urination. 130 00:05:05,541 --> 00:05:07,064 Hmm. 131 00:05:07,065 --> 00:05:09,457 ♪ ♪ 132 00:05:11,267 --> 00:05:12,533 (all gasp) 133 00:05:15,363 --> 00:05:18,039 MARGE (gasps): Ooh. 134 00:05:21,196 --> 00:05:24,946 Okay, who wants Miguelitos? 135 00:05:24,947 --> 00:05:26,489 Now, I should warn the newbies... 136 00:05:26,490 --> 00:05:29,301 These will seem very authentic to you. 137 00:05:29,302 --> 00:05:32,886 Mmm. This stuff is pura vida in a glass. 138 00:05:32,887 --> 00:05:34,306 What's pura vida? 139 00:05:34,307 --> 00:05:35,790 (chuckling) 140 00:05:35,791 --> 00:05:37,643 Oh... (continues chuckling) 141 00:05:37,644 --> 00:05:39,794 Uh, it means "pure life." 142 00:05:39,795 --> 00:05:41,963 Kind of a state of mind down here. 143 00:05:41,964 --> 00:05:43,258 Very chill. 144 00:05:43,259 --> 00:05:44,817 Like what you think of as chill 145 00:05:44,818 --> 00:05:47,635 but, like, a million times chiller. 146 00:05:47,636 --> 00:05:50,138 Homie, I think I'm having an experience. 147 00:05:50,139 --> 00:05:54,826 Every time a fruit meets a booze, a magic vacation is born. 148 00:05:55,978 --> 00:05:58,287 ♪ ♪ 149 00:05:59,982 --> 00:06:02,125 - (cash register dings) - (Lisa groans) 150 00:06:05,246 --> 00:06:07,197 Mmm. 151 00:06:07,198 --> 00:06:08,965 (groaning): Oh... 152 00:06:10,677 --> 00:06:11,844 Well, you can try. 153 00:06:11,845 --> 00:06:13,870 (laughter) 154 00:06:13,871 --> 00:06:16,039 Oh, boy, I didn't know that. 155 00:06:16,040 --> 00:06:18,183 - Hmm? - Hmm? 156 00:06:18,184 --> 00:06:20,018 (laughter) 157 00:06:20,019 --> 00:06:21,211 So true. 158 00:06:21,212 --> 00:06:23,096 - EVELYN: Hmm... - HOMER: Hmm. 159 00:06:23,097 --> 00:06:26,230 Rodrigo, Rodrigo, mi hermano, 160 00:06:26,231 --> 00:06:27,934 put the bill on this. (chuckles) 161 00:06:27,935 --> 00:06:31,513 Nothing is less pura vida than check-splitting. 162 00:06:31,514 --> 00:06:34,701 On this trip I pay for everything up front... 163 00:06:34,702 --> 00:06:36,707 Food, the villa rental, 164 00:06:36,708 --> 00:06:39,257 cloud forest murder mystery... 165 00:06:39,258 --> 00:06:40,947 And I keep track of 'em right here. 166 00:06:40,948 --> 00:06:43,375 Then we settle up at the end. 167 00:06:43,376 --> 00:06:46,064 ANNOUNCER: Smokey Blandings is putting on 168 00:06:46,065 --> 00:06:48,133 a cornhole clinic tonight. 169 00:06:48,134 --> 00:06:50,883 ANNOUNCER 2: And this is where fatigue really sets in, Jim. 170 00:06:50,884 --> 00:06:53,207 When you're tossing that fourth beanbag, 171 00:06:53,208 --> 00:06:55,058 your muscles are screaming, son. 172 00:06:55,919 --> 00:06:58,039 - Booyah! - Good heavenly days! 173 00:06:58,040 --> 00:06:59,558 Hmm? 174 00:06:59,559 --> 00:07:02,585 You also follow the pro cornhole tour? 175 00:07:02,586 --> 00:07:05,592 Sure do. I used to play on my daddy's farm. 176 00:07:05,593 --> 00:07:07,447 We'd toss bags all day, 177 00:07:07,448 --> 00:07:10,143 even when it was hotter than a two-dollar pistol. 178 00:07:10,144 --> 00:07:11,570 Ooh, ooh. 179 00:07:11,571 --> 00:07:13,274 That is hot. 180 00:07:13,275 --> 00:07:16,391 Do you always speak in such colorful Southern-isms? 181 00:07:16,392 --> 00:07:20,579 (laughs) Does a mama possum skip church on Sundays? 182 00:07:20,580 --> 00:07:22,080 Hmm. 183 00:07:22,081 --> 00:07:24,566 I bet she does. 184 00:07:24,567 --> 00:07:26,326 (laughs) 185 00:07:26,327 --> 00:07:28,069 Homer, put your phone away. 186 00:07:28,070 --> 00:07:29,675 Evelyn, please. 187 00:07:30,679 --> 00:07:31,948 (both chuckle) 188 00:07:31,949 --> 00:07:33,166 ♪ ♪ 189 00:07:33,167 --> 00:07:36,077 Evelyn, you don't want to go shopping with us? 190 00:07:36,078 --> 00:07:38,393 It's a vacation, sugar bear. 191 00:07:38,394 --> 00:07:41,191 We should be lying on the beach like a lost flip-flop. 192 00:07:41,192 --> 00:07:43,160 (chuckles) 193 00:07:43,161 --> 00:07:46,754 But, darling, there's nothing to do at the beach except drink. 194 00:07:46,755 --> 00:07:50,213 You know what? Why don't you two take in the sights 195 00:07:50,214 --> 00:07:53,094 while I chaperone your Southern señorita to the beach? 196 00:07:53,095 --> 00:07:57,098 Well, my, my, what an elegant solution. 197 00:07:57,099 --> 00:07:59,526 Well, I guess this way everyone's happy. 198 00:07:59,527 --> 00:08:01,118 (Marge and Patty grumble) 199 00:08:03,289 --> 00:08:04,705 (Evelyn chuckles) 200 00:08:07,034 --> 00:08:08,943 Tonight's dinner is amazing, folks: 201 00:08:08,944 --> 00:08:11,282 line-caught mahi mahi. 202 00:08:11,283 --> 00:08:14,824 The local fishermen pass the lines down from father to son, 203 00:08:14,825 --> 00:08:17,118 so, boy, you can taste the heritage. 204 00:08:17,119 --> 00:08:18,136 (monkeys screeching) 205 00:08:18,137 --> 00:08:19,471 KIRK: Dios mío! 206 00:08:19,472 --> 00:08:20,997 Eh, what? 207 00:08:20,998 --> 00:08:22,549 Oh. Hey, guys. 208 00:08:22,550 --> 00:08:25,001 We met these awesome monkeys on the beach, 209 00:08:25,002 --> 00:08:27,128 and we said they could crash here 210 00:08:27,129 --> 00:08:29,480 in exchange for them being hilarious. 211 00:08:33,010 --> 00:08:36,012 (laughs) Sweetie, you did not tell me 212 00:08:36,013 --> 00:08:38,473 your brother-in-law was such a fun guy. 213 00:08:38,474 --> 00:08:41,326 You two should be so happy. 214 00:08:41,327 --> 00:08:44,298 Your husband and your girlfriend 215 00:08:44,299 --> 00:08:46,314 are amigos! 216 00:08:46,315 --> 00:08:47,682 (Marge and Patty grumble) 217 00:08:47,683 --> 00:08:49,815 (gasps) Who's that with you, Jimbo? 218 00:08:49,816 --> 00:08:51,609 Is that Stacy? 219 00:08:51,610 --> 00:08:53,171 Oh, my God. 220 00:08:53,172 --> 00:08:55,542 Jimbo is cheating on me! 221 00:08:55,543 --> 00:08:57,049 Wha...? 222 00:09:01,481 --> 00:09:03,515 Okay, makeup kit, selfie stick. 223 00:09:03,516 --> 00:09:06,167 (gasps) Oh, God, where's the selfie stick charger? 224 00:09:06,168 --> 00:09:07,335 Honey, relax. 225 00:09:07,336 --> 00:09:10,188 The waterfall picture's going to be fine. 226 00:09:10,189 --> 00:09:12,382 Fine? If this photo is just "fine," 227 00:09:12,383 --> 00:09:14,192 we're getting a divorce. 228 00:09:14,193 --> 00:09:16,603 - (whimpers) - Okay, okay, that crossed the line, 229 00:09:16,604 --> 00:09:18,864 but this is a once-in-a-lifetime trip 230 00:09:18,865 --> 00:09:22,545 and our only shot at a perfect moment. 231 00:09:22,546 --> 00:09:26,538 I get it... you're mad about my awesome monkey party. 232 00:09:26,539 --> 00:09:29,166 But you wanted me to be nice to Patty's girlfriend, 233 00:09:29,167 --> 00:09:31,067 and guess what. She's cool. 234 00:09:31,068 --> 00:09:33,879 Just what you need, another drinking buddy. 235 00:09:33,880 --> 00:09:36,957 Just promise me you'll behave for the rest of the trip. 236 00:09:36,958 --> 00:09:39,242 Okay, okay. I will stay far away 237 00:09:39,243 --> 00:09:41,294 from Patty's fun Southern girlfriend. 238 00:09:41,295 --> 00:09:43,329 Or as she would say, 239 00:09:43,330 --> 00:09:45,373 "further away than a fat-cheeked boy 240 00:09:45,374 --> 00:09:47,968 from a porch full of grannies." 241 00:09:47,969 --> 00:09:49,585 (giggles) 242 00:09:49,586 --> 00:09:51,879 Run, fat boy, run! 243 00:09:51,880 --> 00:09:53,522 (grunting) 244 00:09:54,809 --> 00:09:56,901 (anxious panting) 245 00:09:58,071 --> 00:09:59,404 Why are you freaking out? 246 00:09:59,405 --> 00:10:00,630 Shouldn't you be in the jungle 247 00:10:00,631 --> 00:10:02,724 kissing a boa constrictor or something? 248 00:10:02,725 --> 00:10:05,268 This trip is so expensive, and Mom and Dad don't care, 249 00:10:05,269 --> 00:10:07,895 so I'm practicing sleeping in a car 250 00:10:07,896 --> 00:10:10,749 for when we lose the house and have to sleep in our car! 251 00:10:10,750 --> 00:10:13,533 Well, Milhouse's dad writes down how much money everyone owes 252 00:10:13,534 --> 00:10:16,112 in that book, so all we have to do is snag it, 253 00:10:16,113 --> 00:10:17,723 then show Mom and Dad the numbers. 254 00:10:17,724 --> 00:10:21,258 Yes! That'll snap 'em out of their financial insanity. 255 00:10:22,336 --> 00:10:24,787 You up for a little breaking and entering? 256 00:10:24,788 --> 00:10:27,173 Break into a grown-up's bedroom? 257 00:10:27,174 --> 00:10:29,225 Whoa, big move. 258 00:10:29,226 --> 00:10:32,052 Okay, we'll do it when everyone's on the hike. 259 00:10:32,053 --> 00:10:34,174 But how do we get rid of Milhouse? 260 00:10:34,175 --> 00:10:36,510 Not a problem. Milhouse already ditched me 261 00:10:36,511 --> 00:10:37,719 for Dr. Hibbert's kid. 262 00:10:37,720 --> 00:10:39,927 His "vacation friend." 263 00:10:39,928 --> 00:10:43,264 Hey, JJ, do you still like Legos? 264 00:10:43,265 --> 00:10:45,881 - Uh... not really. - Me neither. 265 00:10:45,882 --> 00:10:48,695 Lego sucks! (grunts) 266 00:10:48,696 --> 00:10:52,624 Hey, JJ, why don't we put on a play for the grown-ups tonight? 267 00:10:52,625 --> 00:10:56,277 Ooh, sweetie, look, a "Flowers of Costa Rica" 268 00:10:56,278 --> 00:10:59,992 scavenger hunt. I wonder how many we can find together? 269 00:10:59,993 --> 00:11:02,045 Just braid, Daddy! 270 00:11:02,046 --> 00:11:05,045 I need to look super hot to win back Jimbo's heart. 271 00:11:05,046 --> 00:11:06,954 (sighs) Darling, you're experiencing 272 00:11:06,955 --> 00:11:09,307 so many emotions for the first time. 273 00:11:09,308 --> 00:11:11,459 And that's very healthy, but... 274 00:11:11,460 --> 00:11:13,936 He strayed because of you! 275 00:11:15,514 --> 00:11:19,008 Hey, JJ, one time my friend got a temporary tattoo 276 00:11:19,009 --> 00:11:21,987 but told his dad it was real. 277 00:11:21,988 --> 00:11:24,641 Okay, let's steal that ledger. 278 00:11:24,642 --> 00:11:25,767 What's that thing? 279 00:11:25,768 --> 00:11:27,826 Grappling hook made of Patty's underwire bra 280 00:11:27,827 --> 00:11:29,552 and Dad's bathing suit drawstring. 281 00:11:29,553 --> 00:11:31,163 Will it reach? 282 00:11:31,164 --> 00:11:32,038 (grunts) 283 00:11:36,836 --> 00:11:37,960 (clicks) 284 00:11:40,006 --> 00:11:44,325 This is so weird, being in another grown-up's bedroom. 285 00:11:44,769 --> 00:11:48,755 Boy, you're telling me. He doesn't even work out. 286 00:11:48,756 --> 00:11:52,500 Uh, I don't want to learn anything else about this family. 287 00:11:52,501 --> 00:11:54,094 It's too late. 288 00:11:54,095 --> 00:11:55,978 (both shuddering) 289 00:11:57,431 --> 00:11:59,265 All right, bottled water break. 290 00:11:59,266 --> 00:12:01,267 I can drink from the stream. 291 00:12:01,268 --> 00:12:05,363 After all these years, my gut biome is simpatico 292 00:12:05,364 --> 00:12:07,118 with the local bacteria. 293 00:12:09,756 --> 00:12:13,279 Ugh! Oh, God, there's something moving inside me! 294 00:12:13,280 --> 00:12:15,565 Oh, look out! Oh, look out! 295 00:12:15,566 --> 00:12:18,043 Look out, I said look out! Look out! 296 00:12:18,044 --> 00:12:22,530 Oh, God, no simpatico! No simpatico! 297 00:12:22,531 --> 00:12:25,625 Hey, Homer. You want a hit off this? 298 00:12:25,626 --> 00:12:29,704 Oh, Evelyn. You and I both love secret day drinking, 299 00:12:29,705 --> 00:12:31,914 but I promised Marge I'd have a bad time 300 00:12:31,915 --> 00:12:33,558 the rest of this vacation. 301 00:12:33,559 --> 00:12:36,297 I hear exactly what you're saying. 302 00:12:37,638 --> 00:12:40,981 Mm-hmm? Mmm. 303 00:12:43,236 --> 00:12:45,428 - (gasps) - Did you find the ledger? 304 00:12:45,429 --> 00:12:48,556 No, but take a look at this. 305 00:12:48,557 --> 00:12:50,575 These are stone spheres 306 00:12:50,576 --> 00:12:54,439 made by the extinct Diquis people of Costa Rica. 307 00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:56,141 No one knows what they were for, 308 00:12:56,142 --> 00:12:58,107 but they're priceless artifacts. 309 00:12:58,108 --> 00:13:01,586 So what is Milhouse's loser dad doing with them? 310 00:13:01,587 --> 00:13:03,496 - (lock clicks) - (both gasp) 311 00:13:03,497 --> 00:13:05,615 (Kirk groans) 312 00:13:05,616 --> 00:13:08,075 Oh, I'm sorry, Kirk's tum-tum. 313 00:13:08,076 --> 00:13:09,285 (groans) 314 00:13:09,286 --> 00:13:10,745 Daddy drank some ick-ick. 315 00:13:10,746 --> 00:13:12,580 (Kirk groans) 316 00:13:12,581 --> 00:13:14,081 Oh, the rumblies are coming. 317 00:13:14,082 --> 00:13:15,874 The rumblies are coming! 318 00:13:15,875 --> 00:13:18,419 - They're here! - (Bart grunts) 319 00:13:18,420 --> 00:13:20,180 (Kirk groans) 320 00:13:20,181 --> 00:13:22,515 If we get this photo right, 321 00:13:22,516 --> 00:13:26,325 this multi-family vacation will be worth every penny. 322 00:13:26,326 --> 00:13:27,779 (Homer giggles) 323 00:13:27,780 --> 00:13:30,675 You're so cute when you're super controlling. 324 00:13:30,676 --> 00:13:31,782 - (Marge sniffs) - (phone camera clicks) 325 00:13:31,783 --> 00:13:33,372 You've been drinking. 326 00:13:33,373 --> 00:13:35,144 (slurring): Well, maybe Evelyn added 327 00:13:35,145 --> 00:13:37,956 a little Southern charm to my water. 328 00:13:37,957 --> 00:13:41,130 That woman! She brings out the worst in you! 329 00:13:41,131 --> 00:13:42,985 Look! 330 00:13:42,986 --> 00:13:44,129 MARGE: Oh, my God. 331 00:13:44,130 --> 00:13:45,780 It's perfect. 332 00:13:45,781 --> 00:13:47,657 You look good, and I look better. 333 00:13:47,658 --> 00:13:49,560 Post it. Post it. 334 00:13:49,561 --> 00:13:51,303 EVELYN: Homer! 335 00:13:51,304 --> 00:13:55,289 Buddy, hi. Watch me do a Savannah Polecat Flip. 336 00:13:55,290 --> 00:13:57,016 (whoops, grunts) 337 00:13:58,293 --> 00:14:00,060 No! 338 00:14:01,314 --> 00:14:03,056 Come back, camera fish! 339 00:14:03,057 --> 00:14:05,107 (grunting) Oh! 340 00:14:06,134 --> 00:14:07,652 (grunts) 341 00:14:07,653 --> 00:14:09,896 (Homer groaning frantically) 342 00:14:09,897 --> 00:14:11,159 (Patty growls) 343 00:14:13,400 --> 00:14:17,778 All I wanted was for my friends to be jealous of me. 344 00:14:17,779 --> 00:14:19,291 I hope you're happy 345 00:14:19,292 --> 00:14:22,553 now that that bald gorilla has dragged my girlfriend down 346 00:14:22,554 --> 00:14:24,669 to his pathetic level. 347 00:14:24,670 --> 00:14:26,545 (snoring) 348 00:14:27,748 --> 00:14:29,657 Patricia Maleficent Bouvier, 349 00:14:29,658 --> 00:14:32,252 I've put up with you criticizing my husband for years, 350 00:14:32,253 --> 00:14:33,920 and I've had it. 351 00:14:33,921 --> 00:14:35,347 Evelyn got Homer drunk. 352 00:14:35,348 --> 00:14:37,498 Evelyn ruined my dream photo. 353 00:14:37,499 --> 00:14:39,184 She's the bad influence. 354 00:14:39,185 --> 00:14:41,094 That's ridiculous. 355 00:14:41,095 --> 00:14:44,046 She may be Southern, she may be a woman, 356 00:14:44,047 --> 00:14:46,558 but you're dating a Homer. 357 00:14:46,559 --> 00:14:49,527 (Evelyn and Homer snoring) 358 00:14:49,528 --> 00:14:51,863 Oh, no. 359 00:14:51,864 --> 00:14:55,516 Mom, look what I found in the Van Houtens' room! 360 00:14:55,517 --> 00:14:59,204 They are smuggling these artifacts home to sell! 361 00:14:59,205 --> 00:15:00,855 (all gasping) 362 00:15:00,856 --> 00:15:02,754 That's how they can afford this vacation. 363 00:15:02,755 --> 00:15:04,042 But we can't. 364 00:15:04,043 --> 00:15:06,044 And we're gonna have to live in our car, 365 00:15:06,045 --> 00:15:08,254 and the seats in our car are sticky, 366 00:15:08,255 --> 00:15:10,239 even though they're cloth! 367 00:15:10,240 --> 00:15:13,293 (sobbing): You're... you're so gross. 368 00:15:13,294 --> 00:15:15,220 It's so gross. 369 00:15:15,221 --> 00:15:18,068 Salt... and pepper. 370 00:15:18,069 --> 00:15:20,133 These souvenirs were supposed to be 371 00:15:20,134 --> 00:15:23,694 our end-of-multi-family-vacation gift to you all. 372 00:15:23,695 --> 00:15:25,611 Way to spoil the surprise. 373 00:15:26,126 --> 00:15:28,628 Not very pura vida. 374 00:15:28,629 --> 00:15:31,057 Not very pura vida at all. 375 00:15:31,058 --> 00:15:32,261 (Lisa and Marge grunt) 376 00:15:32,262 --> 00:15:34,739 Stacy and I are finished. 377 00:15:34,740 --> 00:15:37,402 Shauna Chalmers, will you marry me? 378 00:15:37,403 --> 00:15:38,818 Oh, my God! 379 00:15:38,819 --> 00:15:40,436 Jimbo proposed! 380 00:15:40,437 --> 00:15:43,898 We are getting freaking married! 381 00:15:43,899 --> 00:15:46,165 (chattering) 382 00:15:49,663 --> 00:15:52,088 Oh, you guys are slinking off early. 383 00:15:52,089 --> 00:15:55,728 Don't you want to come ziplining and ruin the trip some more? 384 00:15:55,729 --> 00:15:57,411 Well, I would... 385 00:15:57,412 --> 00:16:00,679 like to agree with my wife that it's better we leave. 386 00:16:00,680 --> 00:16:03,509 I'll give you the final bill now so we can settle up. 387 00:16:03,510 --> 00:16:06,087 No discount for leaving early either. (laughs) 388 00:16:06,088 --> 00:16:10,399 I may be mucho pura vida, but, uh, I'm not a sucker. 389 00:16:12,019 --> 00:16:13,601 Lisa was right. 390 00:16:13,602 --> 00:16:15,863 We really couldn't afford this trip. 391 00:16:18,475 --> 00:16:19,984 (breathing loudly) 392 00:16:19,985 --> 00:16:21,143 (whoops) 393 00:16:21,144 --> 00:16:22,862 Ooh, that's a big number. 394 00:16:22,863 --> 00:16:25,205 (guttural panting) 395 00:16:32,539 --> 00:16:33,614 (groans) 396 00:16:33,615 --> 00:16:35,799 How's Patty? I haven't seen her. 397 00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:37,135 I don't know what happened. 398 00:16:37,136 --> 00:16:39,178 She... broke up with me. 399 00:16:40,714 --> 00:16:41,881 Yeesh. 400 00:16:41,882 --> 00:16:43,549 I know you feel bad, Mom, 401 00:16:43,550 --> 00:16:45,642 but the lady is a Homer. 402 00:16:48,147 --> 00:16:50,890 BOTH: Mmm. 403 00:16:50,891 --> 00:16:53,175 Oh, all that money, 404 00:16:53,176 --> 00:16:55,136 and we didn't even get the picture. 405 00:16:55,137 --> 00:16:57,138 (gasps) Look at this. 406 00:16:57,139 --> 00:16:59,348 Mr. Van Houten even charged us 407 00:16:59,349 --> 00:17:01,993 for those salt and pepper shakers. 408 00:17:01,994 --> 00:17:03,941 He said those were a gift. 409 00:17:03,942 --> 00:17:05,663 And he didn't even give them to us. 410 00:17:05,664 --> 00:17:08,212 Then we're not leaving without them. 411 00:17:08,213 --> 00:17:09,667 - (Homer grunts) - (Bart yells) 412 00:17:09,668 --> 00:17:10,667 (thud) 413 00:17:15,323 --> 00:17:17,417 (all gasping) 414 00:17:17,418 --> 00:17:21,470 Oh, so that explains it. 415 00:17:24,925 --> 00:17:26,926 HOMER: Gotcha. 416 00:17:26,927 --> 00:17:29,879 Can't you let us even zipline in peace? 417 00:17:29,880 --> 00:17:33,215 Look what we found hidden in your bedroom. 418 00:17:33,216 --> 00:17:36,940 This is a portrait of explorer Kirkedemious Van Houten, 419 00:17:36,941 --> 00:17:40,698 who settled this area for a Dutch cracker-trading company, 420 00:17:40,699 --> 00:17:45,297 and he built this house, which your family still owns. 421 00:17:45,298 --> 00:17:47,897 You're charging us thousands of dollars in rent 422 00:17:47,898 --> 00:17:49,874 for a house you get for free. 423 00:17:49,875 --> 00:17:52,026 The Van Houtens are cheating all of us, 424 00:17:52,027 --> 00:17:55,139 so we pay for their vacation. 425 00:17:55,140 --> 00:17:57,531 - I'm stunned. - I'm shocked. 426 00:17:57,532 --> 00:17:59,074 I'm Shauna. 427 00:17:59,075 --> 00:18:02,128 I'm just as surprised as any of you. 428 00:18:02,129 --> 00:18:04,055 Oh, what?! Come on! 429 00:18:04,056 --> 00:18:06,224 This scam was her idea. 430 00:18:06,225 --> 00:18:09,043 And this year she even charged you more 431 00:18:09,044 --> 00:18:11,563 so we could pay for our "intimacy coach." 432 00:18:11,564 --> 00:18:14,474 I mean, how many things can you do with a feather? 433 00:18:14,475 --> 00:18:15,733 Ooh. 434 00:18:15,734 --> 00:18:17,384 Oh, easy, guys, easy. 435 00:18:17,385 --> 00:18:21,096 Everyone try to remain pura vida. Huh? 436 00:18:21,097 --> 00:18:23,224 I'm gonna pura vida my foot in your ass 437 00:18:23,225 --> 00:18:25,094 if you don't give me back my money. 438 00:18:25,095 --> 00:18:27,923 He's zipping away! 439 00:18:27,924 --> 00:18:30,998 Stop him before he endorses those checks! 440 00:18:32,943 --> 00:18:35,069 So, you and Evelyn broke up? 441 00:18:35,070 --> 00:18:36,904 I thought you really liked her. 442 00:18:36,905 --> 00:18:40,829 I did, but now all I see is Homer, thanks to you. 443 00:18:40,830 --> 00:18:43,244 Patty! Come back! 444 00:18:43,245 --> 00:18:47,006 I can't! Because I'm on a zipline... 445 00:18:47,007 --> 00:18:48,674 Ooh. (grunts) 446 00:18:48,675 --> 00:18:53,104 Patty, I'm sorry I upset you, but Evelyn is your Homer, 447 00:18:53,105 --> 00:18:55,940 and no one else will ever understand why you love her, 448 00:18:55,941 --> 00:18:57,609 except for you. 449 00:18:57,610 --> 00:19:00,427 But there's one huge difference between them. 450 00:19:00,428 --> 00:19:02,113 (grunts) 451 00:19:02,114 --> 00:19:05,795 (Marge grunting) 452 00:19:05,796 --> 00:19:07,048 I'm listening. 453 00:19:07,049 --> 00:19:08,953 Evelyn loves you, 454 00:19:08,954 --> 00:19:12,698 and Homer hates you more than anything in the world. 455 00:19:12,699 --> 00:19:14,533 Even more than he hates Selma? 456 00:19:14,534 --> 00:19:16,127 He feels sorry for Selma, 457 00:19:16,128 --> 00:19:18,414 because she has to live with you. 458 00:19:18,415 --> 00:19:20,173 Hold on, Evelyn! 459 00:19:20,174 --> 00:19:22,549 I'm coming! 460 00:19:24,160 --> 00:19:25,619 Go ahead, take your money. 461 00:19:25,620 --> 00:19:27,805 Take away a man's only source of income. 462 00:19:27,806 --> 00:19:29,633 No, it's real classy. 463 00:19:29,634 --> 00:19:32,501 We just got a free vacation. 464 00:19:32,502 --> 00:19:34,448 LISA, MARGE AND BART: Hooray! 465 00:19:34,449 --> 00:19:37,482 Now let's charter a helicopter back to the waterfall 466 00:19:37,483 --> 00:19:40,301 to get your mom's precious picture. 467 00:19:40,302 --> 00:19:41,818 (groans) 468 00:19:41,819 --> 00:19:44,656 No, no, no. It's okay. 469 00:19:44,657 --> 00:19:47,233 Vacations aren't about the perfect photo. 470 00:19:47,234 --> 00:19:50,978 It's about being in the moment and living your... vida. 471 00:19:50,979 --> 00:19:52,997 Mwah! 472 00:19:52,998 --> 00:19:54,332 (both exclaiming happily) 473 00:19:54,333 --> 00:19:57,720 They're as cute as two bugs in a rug. 474 00:19:58,486 --> 00:20:00,337 Aw. 475 00:20:08,038 --> 00:20:10,014 (laughs) 476 00:20:10,015 --> 00:20:11,683 Honey, I just want you to know 477 00:20:11,684 --> 00:20:14,001 that Jimbo Jones is a fine young man, 478 00:20:14,002 --> 00:20:16,187 and I'm very happy for you two to be married. 479 00:20:16,188 --> 00:20:18,672 - Truly. - Yeah... 480 00:20:18,673 --> 00:20:22,038 Jimbo's parents freaked out and canceled the wedding. 481 00:20:22,039 --> 00:20:23,052 Whatever. 482 00:20:23,053 --> 00:20:25,158 I'm glad somebody's setting limits. 483 00:20:25,159 --> 00:20:26,639 You know, pumpkin, I'm doing my best. 484 00:20:26,640 --> 00:20:28,038 Do you understand that? 485 00:20:28,039 --> 00:20:30,684 That as a single father, it's not always so easy 486 00:20:30,685 --> 00:20:33,448 to balance guidance with respect for your... 487 00:20:33,449 --> 00:20:35,401 Yeah... 488 00:20:38,360 --> 00:20:41,365 CHALMERS: Yeah, now we're connecting, huh? 489 00:20:41,366 --> 00:20:49,153 Sync and corrections by btsix www.addic7ed.com 490 00:20:49,154 --> 00:20:51,679 Why can't we just leave? 491 00:20:51,680 --> 00:20:54,375 'Cause we have to clean up before Uncle Pete gets here, 492 00:20:54,376 --> 00:20:56,802 or we'll lose our week next year. 493 00:20:56,803 --> 00:20:59,146 - (monkeys hooting) - (screams) 494 00:21:02,142 --> 00:21:05,236 Hey, hey, this stuff is expensive! 495 00:21:05,237 --> 00:21:07,112 ¿Comprende? (grunts) 496 00:21:10,725 --> 00:21:13,152 - Uh-oh. Uh-oh. - (hooting) 497 00:21:13,153 --> 00:21:14,412 No, amigos, no, no. 498 00:21:14,413 --> 00:21:15,562 No, pura vida! 499 00:21:15,563 --> 00:21:16,923 Pura vida! 500 00:21:16,924 --> 00:21:19,499 Oh, no! No bueno!