1 00:00:03,753 --> 00:00:06,089 阿森一族 2 00:00:06,965 --> 00:00:08,049 (歡迎蒞臨春田核電廠) 3 00:00:09,509 --> 00:00:11,052 (微痛牙醫) 4 00:00:11,302 --> 00:00:12,554 (春田小學) 5 00:00:14,931 --> 00:00:18,309 (我不會在擁擠的教室裡喊失火了) 6 00:00:25,775 --> 00:00:27,527 (注意安全) 7 00:00:27,610 --> 00:00:29,362 (《媽媽雜誌》、小丑庫斯提麥片) 8 00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:49,799 (老莫小酒館) 9 00:00:52,469 --> 00:00:53,553 (巴士) 10 00:01:30,632 --> 00:01:33,301 現在與空中的主持人連線 11 00:01:33,384 --> 00:01:35,804 比爾派在KBBL直昇機上為您報導 12 00:01:35,887 --> 00:01:38,181 -請說,比爾 -壞消息,各位司機 13 00:01:38,264 --> 00:01:40,266 高速公路上有輛載滿甜瓜的貨車翻覆 14 00:01:40,350 --> 00:01:42,352 現場一片混亂,好多人在一旁圍觀 15 00:01:42,435 --> 00:01:43,520 還有人拿起甜瓜互砸 16 00:01:43,603 --> 00:01:45,688 -所以車流受阻… -嘿,甜甜圈 17 00:01:45,772 --> 00:01:46,815 (美味甜甜圈) 18 00:01:46,898 --> 00:01:48,399 巴特,最後一個是我的 19 00:01:53,238 --> 00:01:54,989 好耶 20 00:01:55,073 --> 00:01:56,616 -荷馬 -爸爸 21 00:01:57,367 --> 00:01:59,160 完了,校車 22 00:01:59,494 --> 00:02:01,746 急什麼,我們來了 23 00:02:01,913 --> 00:02:03,039 你們忘了帶我做的愛心午餐 24 00:02:03,123 --> 00:02:04,124 (庫斯提、小精靈) 25 00:02:04,249 --> 00:02:06,626 -不用了,媽 -我們拿到錢了 26 00:02:06,793 --> 00:02:08,628 -你們給我… -啊 27 00:02:16,344 --> 00:02:17,637 噢 28 00:02:18,012 --> 00:02:19,806 我是比爾派,為您報導空中消息 29 00:02:19,889 --> 00:02:22,016 下次見,KBBL電台 30 00:02:22,183 --> 00:02:25,728 瑪姬,又只剩下妳和我了 31 00:02:28,773 --> 00:02:31,401 您正在收聽KBBL電台 報導最新消息,24小時不打烊 32 00:02:31,526 --> 00:02:33,319 如果您想和其他聽眾 33 00:02:33,403 --> 00:02:34,779 分享讓人難堪的問題 34 00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:36,990 請您撥給我們線上的心理治療師 35 00:02:37,073 --> 00:02:38,158 馬文門羅醫師 36 00:02:38,241 --> 00:02:40,535 我們的電話是“555-真痛苦” 37 00:02:42,829 --> 00:02:44,664 別害怕,即刻來電 38 00:02:47,167 --> 00:02:48,042 喂 39 00:02:48,209 --> 00:02:49,085 (直播中) 40 00:02:49,210 --> 00:02:51,129 我想和門羅醫師聊聊 41 00:02:51,212 --> 00:02:52,881 叫什麼名字?幾歲?什麼問題? 42 00:02:53,298 --> 00:02:55,341 我叫美枝,今年34歲 43 00:02:55,675 --> 00:02:57,468 我的問題出自於我的丈夫 44 00:02:57,552 --> 00:03:00,638 他不聽我說的話,也不懂得珍惜我 45 00:03:00,722 --> 00:03:02,807 我不知道我還能撐多久… 46 00:03:02,891 --> 00:03:05,476 嘿,等到直播開始再抱怨,好嗎? 47 00:03:05,560 --> 00:03:08,229 (春田核電廠) 48 00:03:09,564 --> 00:03:11,691 來看看,下一位是美枝 49 00:03:11,774 --> 00:03:13,026 (美枝,被冷落的妻子) 50 00:03:13,151 --> 00:03:15,111 她今年34歲,困在沒有愛的婚姻中 51 00:03:15,320 --> 00:03:16,487 嘿,放大聲一點 52 00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:18,531 我最愛聽那些瘋子上節目 53 00:03:18,656 --> 00:03:20,116 和我聊聊妳的丈夫,美枝 54 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,743 好啊… 55 00:03:21,993 --> 00:03:24,746 我們一開始約會的時候,他比較貼心 56 00:03:24,829 --> 00:03:27,582 比較浪漫,也比現在瘦18公斤 57 00:03:27,665 --> 00:03:30,251 他還有頭髮,吃飯會拿餐具 58 00:03:32,587 --> 00:03:33,963 最後一句是什麼? 59 00:03:36,007 --> 00:03:37,675 那不是你老婆嗎,荷馬? 60 00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:38,927 別鬧了 61 00:03:39,010 --> 00:03:40,970 我老婆對我死心塌地的 62 00:03:41,054 --> 00:03:42,222 美枝… 63 00:03:42,805 --> 00:03:45,266 我接下來要說的是殘酷的事實 64 00:03:45,725 --> 00:03:47,810 妳的丈夫無視妳的存在 65 00:03:48,478 --> 00:03:52,106 -那好,謝謝 -不是的,別掛斷 66 00:03:52,190 --> 00:03:54,275 這個廢物把妳當做他母親 67 00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:57,487 他不把妳當性感情人看待 68 00:03:57,695 --> 00:03:58,571 真的嗎? 69 00:03:58,655 --> 00:04:01,074 我敢拿我令人反感的聲音保證,美枝 70 00:04:01,282 --> 00:04:04,369 今晚他一踏進家門 71 00:04:04,452 --> 00:04:06,454 妳就要告訴他妳受夠了 72 00:04:06,537 --> 00:04:09,040 如果他不表達愛意,妳就離開他 73 00:04:09,123 --> 00:04:10,541 離開荷馬? 74 00:04:10,708 --> 00:04:13,211 -請不要說出他的真名 -離開培卓? 75 00:04:16,089 --> 00:04:17,882 -妳能誠實以對嗎,美枝? -可以 76 00:04:18,007 --> 00:04:20,176 等他下班回家,妳馬上跟他攤牌 77 00:04:20,343 --> 00:04:22,053 -好啊 -說出妳的真心話 78 00:04:23,304 --> 00:04:24,389 好啊 79 00:04:24,472 --> 00:04:25,848 說得好 80 00:04:27,558 --> 00:04:28,768 拜託,巴特 81 00:04:29,018 --> 00:04:30,019 別鬧了 82 00:04:30,186 --> 00:04:32,105 妳的幽默感到哪去了? 83 00:04:32,188 --> 00:04:34,565 -老莫小酒館 -喂,老艾在嗎? 84 00:04:34,649 --> 00:04:37,026 -老艾? -對,老艾,他叫合玖 85 00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:38,361 我問一下 86 00:04:38,987 --> 00:04:41,698 有電話找老艾…“老艾合玖” 87 00:04:42,156 --> 00:04:43,908 這裡有人是“老艾合玖”嗎? 88 00:04:47,912 --> 00:04:49,163 等一下 89 00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:51,749 你給我聽好,死小孩 90 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:54,294 如果我查到你是誰,我要殺了你 91 00:04:59,132 --> 00:05:02,302 希望你能找到那個小混蛋 老莫,再來一杯 92 00:05:02,385 --> 00:05:04,846 你沒事吧,荷馬?你通常只喝一杯 93 00:05:04,929 --> 00:05:07,056 配點花生、牛肉乾、醃雞蛋 94 00:05:07,181 --> 00:05:08,474 吃完就走 95 00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:12,729 這麼說吧,我今晚不想回家 請給我一整罐 96 00:05:14,022 --> 00:05:15,940 你可以跟我說實話 97 00:05:16,065 --> 00:05:19,277 -你家裡有問題嗎? -可以這麼說 98 00:05:19,360 --> 00:05:22,280 我老婆要離開我,她覺得我是廢物 99 00:05:22,363 --> 00:05:23,698 -荷馬 -怎麼了? 100 00:05:23,781 --> 00:05:26,659 美枝說得對,你是廢物 不信你問酒吧裡其他人 101 00:05:26,826 --> 00:05:27,827 你說什麼? 102 00:05:28,077 --> 00:05:30,121 巴尼,我是廢物嗎? 103 00:05:30,288 --> 00:05:32,623 你和我一樣都是廢物 104 00:05:34,625 --> 00:05:35,918 噢,不 105 00:05:36,002 --> 00:05:37,837 聽到了吧?你是廢物 106 00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:41,466 巴尼是廢物,賴瑞是廢物 我們全都是廢物 107 00:05:41,966 --> 00:05:44,010 不過有一個例外 108 00:05:44,469 --> 00:05:45,511 每隔一段時間 109 00:05:45,636 --> 00:05:48,139 我們能振作起來,打扮整齊 110 00:05:48,431 --> 00:05:49,974 表現得像一般人 111 00:05:50,391 --> 00:05:52,852 荷馬,買花送你老婆,帶她去約會 112 00:05:52,935 --> 00:05:54,437 陪她出去玩一個晚上 113 00:05:54,520 --> 00:05:57,357 蠟燭、桌巾,一應俱全 114 00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:59,108 天啊,好浪漫的夜晚 115 00:05:59,192 --> 00:06:01,194 不行,她那麼聰明,不會被騙的 116 00:06:01,861 --> 00:06:03,780 我還沒說完,吃完晚餐後 117 00:06:03,905 --> 00:06:07,700 你們兩個住進市區最高級的汽車旅館 118 00:06:07,909 --> 00:06:11,162 住到隔天早上再退房 119 00:06:11,287 --> 00:06:13,122 你懂我的意思 120 00:06:13,206 --> 00:06:14,540 我心領神會 121 00:06:14,791 --> 00:06:16,209 嘻嘻 122 00:06:17,752 --> 00:06:20,421 已經6點15分了,爸爸跑去哪裡? 123 00:06:20,546 --> 00:06:23,549 對啊,晚上吃肉卷,誰會遲到? 124 00:06:27,095 --> 00:06:28,846 我想買花 125 00:06:28,930 --> 00:06:30,139 什麼樣的花? 126 00:06:30,640 --> 00:06:32,517 漂亮的那種,不要枯萎的 127 00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:34,727 我們有美麗的長梗玫瑰 128 00:06:35,019 --> 00:06:36,729 一打55元 129 00:06:37,355 --> 00:06:38,356 請給我一朵 130 00:06:52,370 --> 00:06:54,330 -媽媽 -有東西吃嗎? 131 00:07:17,353 --> 00:07:19,272 妳的丈夫無視妳的存在 132 00:07:19,897 --> 00:07:22,817 這個廢物把妳當做他母親… 133 00:07:23,025 --> 00:07:26,112 他不把妳當性感情人看待 134 00:07:26,195 --> 00:07:27,864 不把妳當性感情人… 135 00:07:28,197 --> 00:07:29,740 如果他不表達愛意… 136 00:07:42,295 --> 00:07:45,590 美枝,我…愛妳 137 00:07:45,673 --> 00:07:47,091 不行,這樣不好 138 00:07:47,675 --> 00:07:50,595 美枝,甜心,我愛妳 139 00:07:50,678 --> 00:07:52,096 噢 140 00:07:52,513 --> 00:07:54,599 美枝,愛妳喔,寶貝 141 00:07:56,684 --> 00:07:58,936 美枝,親愛的、美女、甜心 142 00:07:59,604 --> 00:08:02,190 這樣子不行 143 00:08:10,698 --> 00:08:12,492 我愛妳,美枝 144 00:08:12,783 --> 00:08:14,243 荷馬 145 00:08:14,327 --> 00:08:16,162 我也愛你 146 00:08:19,749 --> 00:08:21,834 晚餐前的娛樂節目 147 00:08:22,627 --> 00:08:24,629 -老莫小酒館 -托小姐在嗎? 148 00:08:24,712 --> 00:08:26,964 -找誰? -“托廣光”小姐 149 00:08:27,048 --> 00:08:28,466 等一下,我問問看 150 00:08:28,549 --> 00:08:30,176 “托廣光”小姐 151 00:08:30,384 --> 00:08:32,428 有人要找“托廣光”小姐 152 00:08:35,681 --> 00:08:38,518 我在高級法國餐廳訂了位了 153 00:08:39,227 --> 00:08:41,103 可是,荷馬,這太貴了吧 154 00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:44,106 無所謂,我的愛人,吃完點心後 155 00:08:44,190 --> 00:08:47,151 我們要住進匝道出口旅館二樓 156 00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:49,320 荷馬,我好興奮 157 00:08:49,570 --> 00:08:51,322 等等,那誰來看孩子? 158 00:08:51,656 --> 00:08:53,241 -完了 -別擔心 159 00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:54,867 聽清楚,討厭搗蛋鬼 160 00:08:54,951 --> 00:08:57,870 要是讓我找到你,我一定扒光你的皮 161 00:08:57,954 --> 00:08:59,830 天啊,一定是接錯電話線了 162 00:09:02,542 --> 00:09:04,877 橡皮寶寶嬰兒車褓姆服務公司 163 00:09:04,961 --> 00:09:06,420 我是美枝辛普森 164 00:09:06,629 --> 00:09:08,923 -我今晚想找一位褓姆 -等一下 165 00:09:09,131 --> 00:09:10,216 辛普森家族? 166 00:09:10,299 --> 00:09:11,634 小姐,妳在開玩笑吧 167 00:09:11,717 --> 00:09:13,386 (辛普森一家,拒絕往來) 168 00:09:16,722 --> 00:09:19,433 橡皮寶寶嬰兒車褓姆服務公司 169 00:09:19,517 --> 00:09:21,936 喂,我是山普森先生 170 00:09:22,019 --> 00:09:24,105 你太太剛才有打過來嗎? 171 00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:25,856 不,我是山普森,不是辛普森 172 00:09:25,940 --> 00:09:27,316 謝天謝地 173 00:09:27,441 --> 00:09:30,695 辛普森一家都是野蠻人 174 00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:33,990 -尤其那個長得像人猿的爸爸 -可惡 175 00:09:34,073 --> 00:09:36,534 其實辛普森一家是我們的鄰居 176 00:09:36,617 --> 00:09:38,077 在我們看來 177 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:41,205 他們是常受人誤會、被低估的一家人 178 00:09:42,081 --> 00:09:44,125 媽媽,妳看起來好美 179 00:09:44,208 --> 00:09:47,753 今晚非常特別 180 00:09:47,837 --> 00:09:50,798 妳爸爸要帶我出去吃晚餐和跳舞 181 00:09:50,881 --> 00:09:51,882 爸爸會跳舞? 182 00:09:52,008 --> 00:09:53,175 跳得跟天使一樣 183 00:09:53,342 --> 00:09:54,510 啦、啦 184 00:09:54,719 --> 00:09:57,430 啦、啦、啦… 185 00:09:58,055 --> 00:10:00,558 啦、啦、啦… 186 00:10:00,641 --> 00:10:02,768 啦、啦、啦… 187 00:10:02,893 --> 00:10:04,604 盡情搖擺,荷馬 188 00:10:04,687 --> 00:10:07,857 總有一天,你會懂得 如何像老爸一樣跳舞 189 00:10:07,940 --> 00:10:09,275 我才不要 190 00:10:10,276 --> 00:10:12,153 兒子,全天下的女人 191 00:10:12,278 --> 00:10:14,864 都無法抗拒會跳曼波舞的男人 192 00:10:14,947 --> 00:10:17,992 -你什麼都不懂吧,爸爸? -出去,小子 193 00:10:18,242 --> 00:10:19,452 出去 194 00:10:19,619 --> 00:10:20,870 真愛生氣 195 00:10:29,337 --> 00:10:30,504 什麼? 196 00:10:32,715 --> 00:10:35,259 和寶寶的屁股一樣光滑 197 00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:38,971 啦、啦、啦… 198 00:10:39,138 --> 00:10:41,932 親愛的,我好像聽到門鈴響了 199 00:10:42,016 --> 00:10:43,476 妳說得對,美人 200 00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:44,935 巴特,去開門 201 00:10:45,102 --> 00:10:46,562 遵命,曼波男 202 00:10:54,654 --> 00:10:56,656 啦、啦、啦… 203 00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:57,907 妳一定是褓姆 204 00:10:57,990 --> 00:10:59,617 對,我是波茲小姐 205 00:10:59,700 --> 00:11:01,077 別只會站在那裡,小子 206 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:03,204 去幫波茲小姐提行李 207 00:11:03,329 --> 00:11:04,955 我自己會提行李 208 00:11:05,706 --> 00:11:08,084 謝謝妳臨時抽空過來,波茲小姐 209 00:11:08,209 --> 00:11:10,878 這些是我們要去餐廳的電話號碼 210 00:11:10,961 --> 00:11:13,130 還有我們住的汽車旅館 211 00:11:13,214 --> 00:11:14,965 現在要讓瑪姬上床睡覺了 212 00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:17,385 但巴特和麗莎一個小時後才睡覺 213 00:11:17,468 --> 00:11:20,262 他們可以在睡前選一部錄影帶來看 214 00:11:20,429 --> 00:11:23,724 哇,是《快樂小精靈與好奇小熊》 215 00:11:23,933 --> 00:11:26,519 噢,小精靈 216 00:11:26,602 --> 00:11:28,729 掰啦,孩子們,注意那小子 217 00:11:30,648 --> 00:11:33,234 再見,要乖乖聽話 218 00:11:33,317 --> 00:11:36,028 -我們出門了 -啦、啦 219 00:11:36,195 --> 00:11:38,698 啦、啦、啦… 220 00:11:39,198 --> 00:11:42,118 來吧,孩子們,來看《快樂小精靈》 221 00:11:42,201 --> 00:11:43,994 聽好,我們看過爛小精靈電影 222 00:11:44,078 --> 00:11:45,287 看了好幾億次 223 00:11:45,371 --> 00:11:48,582 -也許我們可以看真正的電視節目 -我說過我們要看錄影帶 224 00:11:48,791 --> 00:11:51,627 我只是提出我的建議而已 225 00:11:51,711 --> 00:11:53,796 媽媽會讓我們看所有想看的節目 226 00:11:53,879 --> 00:11:56,298 我說了,你們要看錄影帶 227 00:11:56,382 --> 00:11:59,552 你們最好乖乖聽話 否則我就要你們好看 228 00:11:59,635 --> 00:12:01,095 我不知道我會做出什麼事 229 00:12:01,262 --> 00:12:04,223 因為每個人都會聽我的話 230 00:12:07,476 --> 00:12:08,352 (聯邦調查局警告) 231 00:12:11,272 --> 00:12:13,149 全都看起來好好吃 232 00:12:13,232 --> 00:12:15,860 但我要吃那邊那一隻 233 00:12:15,943 --> 00:12:18,988 您何不選一隻更好動一點的? 234 00:12:19,113 --> 00:12:20,406 為什麼? 235 00:12:20,489 --> 00:12:23,242 您選的那隻翻肚浮在水上 236 00:12:23,325 --> 00:12:27,288 這似乎不是活龍蝦 237 00:12:27,371 --> 00:12:28,789 那好吧 238 00:12:28,873 --> 00:12:31,917 我要選那邊有圓眼睛的那隻 239 00:12:32,168 --> 00:12:35,671 選得好,先生,我能帶您入座嗎? 240 00:12:35,755 --> 00:12:37,423 好的,女士優先 241 00:12:38,090 --> 00:12:40,593 我們等一下還會碰面 242 00:12:40,801 --> 00:12:43,345 (蜂蜜) 243 00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:44,680 救命 244 00:12:44,889 --> 00:12:46,557 快一點 245 00:12:46,807 --> 00:12:48,225 我們要救出波波 246 00:12:49,310 --> 00:12:51,812 天啊,我看不下去了 247 00:12:51,979 --> 00:12:55,191 -可是我想知道會發生什麼事 -妳早就知道了 248 00:12:55,357 --> 00:12:56,942 他們會找到酷克船長的寶藏 249 00:12:57,067 --> 00:12:59,028 全部小精靈會像笨蛋一樣手舞足蹈 250 00:12:59,111 --> 00:13:00,279 我吐了,劇終 251 00:13:00,404 --> 00:13:03,991 巴特,你和小精靈奇力一樣無法愛人 252 00:13:04,200 --> 00:13:05,576 現在來看真正的電視節目 253 00:13:06,619 --> 00:13:09,455 好耶,正在播《美國持械危險人物》 254 00:13:09,538 --> 00:13:11,916 不行,巴特,我們會做惡夢 255 00:13:11,999 --> 00:13:14,084 放輕鬆,這可是貨真價實的電視節目 256 00:13:14,210 --> 00:13:15,878 如果出現殘忍的緩慢殺人鏡頭 257 00:13:15,961 --> 00:13:17,713 我會叫妳閉上眼睛 258 00:13:17,797 --> 00:13:22,134 這位冷面殺手持有武器,極度危險 259 00:13:22,218 --> 00:13:26,222 如果你看到他,請撥打1800尖叫專線 260 00:13:26,388 --> 00:13:28,808 荷馬,你看起來就像小孩子 261 00:13:28,891 --> 00:13:30,226 因為我無憂無慮嗎? 262 00:13:30,309 --> 00:13:31,894 不是,因為你戴著圍兜 263 00:13:37,858 --> 00:13:39,318 還要喝香檳嗎? 264 00:13:39,527 --> 00:13:40,694 沒了 265 00:13:41,070 --> 00:13:42,488 再點一瓶 266 00:13:42,696 --> 00:13:46,992 服務生,再來一瓶 倒數第二便宜的香檳 267 00:13:47,076 --> 00:13:49,829 無法反抗的小孩手被綑綁 堵住嘴巴,留在客廳裡 268 00:13:49,995 --> 00:13:52,289 大盜自在地在家中走動 269 00:13:52,373 --> 00:13:56,418 偷走這家人畢生收藏的寶貴物品 270 00:13:56,919 --> 00:14:00,548 (賴瑞戴維斯樂隊) 271 00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:18,357 美枝,這好像我們一開始約會的時候 272 00:14:18,732 --> 00:14:20,234 除了一件事 273 00:14:20,818 --> 00:14:22,194 沒有監護人 274 00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:23,946 喔呵呵 275 00:14:24,822 --> 00:14:25,990 褓姆大盜 276 00:14:26,073 --> 00:14:28,117 在夜晚搶劫時留下了足跡 277 00:14:28,200 --> 00:14:30,244 遍布全美國上下 278 00:14:30,327 --> 00:14:31,871 她可能埋伏在任何地方 279 00:14:31,996 --> 00:14:35,207 在不知情的傻子家附近蠢蠢欲動 280 00:14:35,374 --> 00:14:36,917 -唉 -哇 281 00:14:37,126 --> 00:14:40,379 我們稍後要公佈褓姆大盜的真面目 282 00:14:40,462 --> 00:14:42,131 露西爾波茲科斯基 283 00:14:42,214 --> 00:14:44,466 記住,她可能會用別名… 284 00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:45,593 波茲 285 00:14:45,718 --> 00:14:49,346 她可能攜帶武器,而且相當危險 286 00:14:49,430 --> 00:14:51,140 (露西爾波茲科斯基 183公分、80公斤) 287 00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:10,117 快跑 288 00:15:15,873 --> 00:15:18,500 1800爆料專線,不對,是尖叫專線 289 00:15:19,877 --> 00:15:21,420 噢,不 290 00:15:23,631 --> 00:15:26,425 看到匝道出口別忘了說一聲 291 00:15:26,675 --> 00:15:27,676 就在… 292 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:28,969 (老匝道出口旅館) 293 00:15:29,136 --> 00:15:30,137 過頭了 294 00:15:31,513 --> 00:15:33,057 沒問題 295 00:15:33,140 --> 00:15:34,892 我們走下一個出口 296 00:15:38,312 --> 00:15:40,397 (下個出口 55公里) 297 00:15:46,278 --> 00:15:47,571 巴特 298 00:15:48,739 --> 00:15:50,199 巴特 299 00:15:52,159 --> 00:15:54,370 巴特 300 00:15:56,830 --> 00:15:59,750 是時候刷牙洗臉 301 00:15:59,833 --> 00:16:01,710 睡前禱告囉 302 00:16:02,252 --> 00:16:03,921 你在… 303 00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:05,965 這裡嗎? 304 00:16:06,173 --> 00:16:08,509 自製醃甜菜頭 305 00:16:10,469 --> 00:16:12,012 動手吧,儘管拿 306 00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:18,352 既然沒有人受傷 307 00:16:18,477 --> 00:16:20,688 我認為沒有必要繼續糾結此事 308 00:16:21,105 --> 00:16:23,148 快點接 309 00:16:24,316 --> 00:16:25,442 終於接了 310 00:16:25,526 --> 00:16:26,986 喂,警戒的觀眾 311 00:16:27,069 --> 00:16:30,155 這裡是《美國持械危險人物》節目 312 00:16:30,322 --> 00:16:32,282 我要報案,有褓姆大盜 313 00:16:32,533 --> 00:16:34,410 她在我們家… 314 00:16:34,702 --> 00:16:36,203 來吧,美枝 315 00:16:36,286 --> 00:16:38,038 我要把妳抱進門 316 00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:39,707 好,但小心一點 317 00:16:39,790 --> 00:16:41,709 不要像上次那樣撞到我的頭 318 00:16:41,792 --> 00:16:44,670 別說了,11年前的事妳居然念念不忘 319 00:16:44,753 --> 00:16:46,171 不要弄亂我的頭髮 320 00:16:46,255 --> 00:16:48,007 噢 321 00:16:48,090 --> 00:16:50,718 痛 322 00:16:50,801 --> 00:16:53,012 這真好玩 323 00:16:54,513 --> 00:16:56,432 我們知道妳的身分了,波茲小姐 324 00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,476 還是要叫妳波茲科斯基小姐 325 00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:01,020 妳就是褓姆大盜 326 00:17:01,103 --> 00:17:02,771 你是個聰明的孩子,巴特 327 00:17:02,855 --> 00:17:05,149 希望你夠聰明,懂得閉嘴 328 00:17:05,232 --> 00:17:06,316 他沒有 329 00:17:06,984 --> 00:17:10,070 要是妳認為妳能逍遙法外,妳就瘋了 妳不能… 330 00:17:10,904 --> 00:17:12,489 我真的不是壞人 331 00:17:12,614 --> 00:17:14,033 來吧,我在辦事的時候 332 00:17:14,199 --> 00:17:17,077 你們可以把你們最愛的錄影帶看完 333 00:17:19,455 --> 00:17:21,665 安靜,巴特,好好把握這個機會 334 00:17:23,500 --> 00:17:25,627 也許我該換上 335 00:17:25,711 --> 00:17:28,172 更舒適的衣服 336 00:17:28,255 --> 00:17:32,051 是藍色的那件嗎? 337 00:17:32,259 --> 00:17:35,262 -看了就知道 -快一點,美女 338 00:17:48,317 --> 00:17:49,568 小孩的東西 339 00:17:50,694 --> 00:17:52,362 根本不值錢 340 00:17:53,197 --> 00:17:54,490 一大堆垃圾 341 00:17:55,074 --> 00:17:56,366 髒東西 342 00:17:56,575 --> 00:17:57,993 山普森一家笨死了 343 00:18:11,423 --> 00:18:13,300 瑪姬 344 00:18:13,509 --> 00:18:14,843 過來 345 00:18:18,806 --> 00:18:20,057 -再見 -大家再見 346 00:18:20,140 --> 00:18:21,266 -掰 -好耶 347 00:18:21,391 --> 00:18:22,392 (劇終) 348 00:18:24,061 --> 00:18:25,229 瑪姬 349 00:18:25,437 --> 00:18:27,898 妳想再看一遍《快樂小精靈》嗎? 350 00:18:29,608 --> 00:18:30,609 好 351 00:18:30,818 --> 00:18:32,694 但妳要先把我放開 352 00:18:36,281 --> 00:18:38,367 噢,荷馬 353 00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:43,789 好耶 354 00:18:45,999 --> 00:18:48,627 妳爬出妳的嬰兒床了 355 00:18:48,919 --> 00:18:51,797 我猜妳也要被綁起來 356 00:18:55,717 --> 00:18:58,428 瑪姬,妳在哪啊? 357 00:18:58,637 --> 00:19:01,390 瑪姬 358 00:19:20,784 --> 00:19:25,080 荷馬,如果我打電話回家 會不會破壞氣氛? 359 00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:27,416 我只想確認孩子們沒事 360 00:19:37,467 --> 00:19:38,719 荷馬,醒來 361 00:19:38,844 --> 00:19:40,888 家裡沒有人接電話 362 00:19:40,971 --> 00:19:42,431 -所以呢? -我很擔心 363 00:19:42,514 --> 00:19:43,932 我想我們應該回家 364 00:19:44,099 --> 00:19:45,601 好吧 365 00:19:45,851 --> 00:19:48,770 我想我的工作完成了,嘻嘻 366 00:19:48,979 --> 00:19:51,899 喂,警戒的觀眾 請問需要什麼協助? 367 00:19:51,982 --> 00:19:54,193 我們抓到她了,我們抓到褓姆大盜 368 00:19:54,276 --> 00:19:56,403 她被綁起來了,在我們家裡 369 00:19:56,570 --> 00:19:58,906 -問問有沒有獎勵 -有獎勵嗎? 370 00:19:59,281 --> 00:20:01,450 如果她被判有罪,我們可以拿到T恤 371 00:20:01,533 --> 00:20:02,659 好耶 372 00:20:02,868 --> 00:20:04,536 為什麼燈還亮著? 373 00:20:04,620 --> 00:20:06,246 我有不好的預感 374 00:20:07,539 --> 00:20:09,208 -波茲小姐 -波茲小姐 375 00:20:10,042 --> 00:20:11,376 天啊 376 00:20:11,460 --> 00:20:13,629 那些搗蛋鬼對妳做了什麼? 377 00:20:14,129 --> 00:20:15,255 我們很抱歉 378 00:20:15,589 --> 00:20:17,007 真的非常抱歉 379 00:20:18,175 --> 00:20:19,801 拜託把電視關掉 380 00:20:20,385 --> 00:20:23,680 發生這種事,我們非常憤怒 381 00:20:23,847 --> 00:20:25,474 這些行李真重 382 00:20:28,018 --> 00:20:30,687 希望妳不會把這件事放在心上 這是雙倍酬勞 383 00:20:30,771 --> 00:20:32,689 -不,三倍 -謝謝 384 00:20:32,773 --> 00:20:34,733 山普森先生,我能給你一點建議嗎? 385 00:20:34,816 --> 00:20:35,859 當然了 386 00:20:35,943 --> 00:20:39,029 千萬別放任那男孩撒野,一秒也不行 387 00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:41,615 妳說得真對,有一次他… 388 00:20:47,120 --> 00:20:50,290 犯案現場在這裡 我把她綁起來,關進房間 389 00:20:50,374 --> 00:20:52,000 等一下,年輕人 390 00:20:52,209 --> 00:20:55,420 我不曉得你這次又在玩哪種把戲 391 00:20:55,504 --> 00:20:58,757 但我得鬆綁你的褓姆 還付了她不少錢… 392 00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:00,801 不好意思,先生 請問你是向全世界說 393 00:21:00,926 --> 00:21:02,678 你幫助並縱容 394 00:21:02,761 --> 00:21:05,222 惡名昭彰的褓姆大盜逃跑? 395 00:21:05,806 --> 00:21:08,100 -什麼? -褓姆大盜 396 00:21:08,892 --> 00:21:12,187 你確定咪高風有開嗎? 397 00:21:12,813 --> 00:21:16,108 我不會用幫助她這種說法 咪高風開了,對吧? 398 00:21:16,191 --> 00:21:18,485 因為其實我跟她搏鬥了很久 399 00:21:18,652 --> 00:21:19,945 唉,荷馬 400 00:21:20,112 --> 00:21:22,614 你看過功夫電影嗎?就像那樣 401 00:21:22,739 --> 00:21:23,740 (荷馬辛普森,本地的白痴) 402 00:21:23,907 --> 00:21:25,325 但現在我知道她的手法 403 00:21:25,409 --> 00:21:28,537 所以如果妳正在聽這段訪問 妳最好想清楚 404 00:21:28,662 --> 00:21:31,456 別再來招惹荷馬辛普森 405 00:21:33,667 --> 00:21:36,878 老天爺,幫幫我,我並不聰明 406 00:21:37,462 --> 00:21:40,257 荷馬,別這麼說 407 00:21:40,924 --> 00:21:43,427 在我看來,如果你養的三個孩子 408 00:21:43,510 --> 00:21:45,887 能夠將陌生人擊倒,綑綁起來 409 00:21:45,971 --> 00:21:47,597 你一定是做對了什麼 410 00:21:47,973 --> 00:21:48,890 好吧 411 00:21:52,102 --> 00:21:53,145 也對 412 00:21:56,940 --> 00:21:58,859 親愛的,我們可以再一次和好嗎? 413 00:21:58,984 --> 00:22:01,069 我的天啊 414 00:22:52,871 --> 00:22:54,873 字幕翻譯:郭婉琳