1 00:00:04,504 --> 00:00:06,131 阿森一族 2 00:00:06,798 --> 00:00:07,841 (歡迎蒞臨春田核電廠) 3 00:00:11,177 --> 00:00:12,220 (春田小學) 4 00:00:15,098 --> 00:00:18,226 (我不敢再呃同學做人肉飛機) 5 00:00:25,483 --> 00:00:27,027 (注意安全) 6 00:00:27,110 --> 00:00:28,987 (《媽媽雜誌》、小丑庫斯提麥片) 7 00:01:10,403 --> 00:01:11,529 不 8 00:01:21,790 --> 00:01:24,250 巴特,馬丁在報告讀書心得時 9 00:01:24,334 --> 00:01:25,710 不准打擾他 10 00:01:25,919 --> 00:01:27,295 “魚,我就要死在你手上了 11 00:01:27,378 --> 00:01:28,379 我從沒見過 12 00:01:28,463 --> 00:01:30,381 像你這般既高雅 13 00:01:30,548 --> 00:01:31,549 又偉大的生物 14 00:01:31,883 --> 00:01:33,426 殺了我吧 15 00:01:33,635 --> 00:01:35,887 我不在乎誰生誰死 16 00:01:35,970 --> 00:01:37,055 (馬丁的讀書心得,與海明威有約) 17 00:01:37,180 --> 00:01:42,227 無論是捕漁、屠牛 跟女人享受魚水之歡 18 00:01:42,936 --> 00:01:44,479 都是為了生存” 19 00:01:45,313 --> 00:01:46,439 多謝大家 20 00:01:47,565 --> 00:01:49,275 太棒了 21 00:01:49,734 --> 00:01:54,114 講得太好了 我還以為海明威本人到現場了 22 00:01:54,405 --> 00:01:57,700 -請叫我老爺 -老爺,要茄汁嗎? 23 00:01:57,909 --> 00:01:59,119 好了,同學 24 00:01:59,244 --> 00:02:02,080 時間還夠多一個人報告,巴特 25 00:02:02,914 --> 00:02:05,333 你《金銀島》的心得準備好了嗎? 26 00:02:05,416 --> 00:02:10,380 不用說,各位同學 準備下巴丟下來吧 27 00:02:11,297 --> 00:02:13,800 一如克拉巴佩爾老師所說 28 00:02:13,883 --> 00:02:16,386 我要分享的書名為《金銀島》 29 00:02:16,469 --> 00:02:17,512 (《金銀島》) 30 00:02:17,595 --> 00:02:19,180 它講一班海盗 31 00:02:19,889 --> 00:02:24,185 戴著眼罩、鑲金牙 32 00:02:24,936 --> 00:02:27,313 膊頭上還有一隻綠色雀仔 33 00:02:29,274 --> 00:02:30,525 這本書的作者 34 00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:33,486 名叫史蒂文森 35 00:02:33,945 --> 00:02:36,197 出版商為信譽良好的 麥格羅希爾公司 36 00:02:36,698 --> 00:02:40,451 總體而言,要我評分一到十分 37 00:02:40,618 --> 00:02:41,953 一分是最低分、十分是最高分 38 00:02:42,036 --> 00:02:46,666 五分是普普通通 我給這本書九分 39 00:02:47,625 --> 00:02:50,336 大家有問題嗎? 沒有?那我坐回去了 40 00:02:50,545 --> 00:02:54,507 -巴特,你真的有看這本書嗎? -克拉老師,妳不相信? 41 00:02:54,716 --> 00:02:56,593 妳這是在懷疑我的人格 42 00:02:56,759 --> 00:03:00,763 那我問你,封面的海盜叫什麼? 43 00:03:01,014 --> 00:03:03,725 黑鬍子、尼莫船長、虎克船長 西爾弗 44 00:03:03,850 --> 00:03:04,851 老鼠皮特、藍鬍子 45 00:03:05,059 --> 00:03:07,854 -藍鬍子 -回去坐好,放學後留下來 46 00:03:09,606 --> 00:03:10,690 (我以後再也不敢吹水) 47 00:03:10,773 --> 00:03:12,901 你由學期初的成績就穩定退步 48 00:03:13,026 --> 00:03:14,861 -你有沒有發現? -有,Miss 49 00:03:15,028 --> 00:03:17,280 你知道明天有個 50 00:03:17,405 --> 00:03:18,907 -美國殖民史的大考嗎? -知道,Miss 51 00:03:21,492 --> 00:03:22,744 知道,Miss 52 00:03:24,454 --> 00:03:27,040 -知道,Miss -巴特,你到底知不知道 53 00:03:27,123 --> 00:03:29,000 -我在講什麼? -知道,Miss 54 00:03:29,083 --> 00:03:30,376 那我剛才說什麼? 55 00:03:31,669 --> 00:03:34,672 -要俾心機? -算你醒目 56 00:03:34,881 --> 00:03:36,174 (嘈死人機鋪) 57 00:03:38,426 --> 00:03:42,555 接招,死老太婆,閃開 弊,是發霉的樟腦丸 58 00:03:42,639 --> 00:03:43,765 被錫到了 59 00:03:43,932 --> 00:03:47,227 你已獲得“不肖子孫”成就 60 00:03:47,310 --> 00:03:49,687 好膽再來 61 00:03:50,230 --> 00:03:52,774 (阿婆錫多啖) 62 00:03:52,899 --> 00:03:53,983 我再玩幾場就去溫書了 63 00:03:54,067 --> 00:03:54,943 (兌換處) 64 00:03:57,779 --> 00:03:59,113 (《貓鼠大戰》) 65 00:04:11,876 --> 00:04:15,713 湯煮好了,快來飲湯 凍了就不好味了 66 00:04:15,922 --> 00:04:17,340 我最憎湯上面那層油 67 00:04:17,465 --> 00:04:19,968 好,我吃完飯就會去溫書了 68 00:04:21,511 --> 00:04:23,221 美枝,可以再幫我拿罐啤酒嗎? 69 00:04:23,304 --> 00:04:25,515 等等,麗莎有好消息要宣布 70 00:04:25,640 --> 00:04:27,850 -媽,他才不在乎 -我當然在乎 71 00:04:28,101 --> 00:04:30,103 我只是想要邊飲邊聽 72 00:04:30,603 --> 00:04:32,105 -美枝? -荷馬 73 00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:34,357 -快說,麗莎 -好 74 00:04:34,732 --> 00:04:36,651 我今天的單字測驗拿了“A” 75 00:04:37,318 --> 00:04:43,199 真的?我真是太高興了 76 00:04:43,574 --> 00:04:44,742 測驗卷拿來,麗莎 77 00:04:44,909 --> 00:04:47,537 我要把它貼在冰箱上 78 00:04:47,620 --> 00:04:48,871 (麗莎辛普森,第一名 貓咪巴特一年級) 79 00:04:48,955 --> 00:04:51,124 哇,無位了 就貼在這上面吧 80 00:04:51,332 --> 00:04:53,793 你搞什麼,不要遮住我的畫 81 00:04:54,961 --> 00:04:56,713 你說那個毛絨絨的醜八怪嗎? 82 00:04:57,171 --> 00:04:59,841 對了,我想起來了,今天百萬大電影 是演《大金鋼週》 83 00:04:59,924 --> 00:05:02,552 -來,兒子 -不,我要去溫書… 84 00:05:04,762 --> 00:05:08,349 大金鋼來了,聞雜人等別擋路 85 00:05:11,394 --> 00:05:13,771 好吧,再看一小時就好 86 00:05:15,773 --> 00:05:16,649 (劇終) 87 00:05:16,899 --> 00:05:20,194 不公平,牠只是隻動物啊 88 00:05:20,695 --> 00:05:22,488 我該去溫書了 89 00:05:23,531 --> 00:05:26,034 蠟蠋兩頭燒啊? 加油,兒子 90 00:05:26,868 --> 00:05:29,412 好,要正經點 91 00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:32,999 “第一章,自由之夢 92 00:05:33,416 --> 00:05:37,378 1620年9月15日 來自英格蘭與荷蘭的 93 00:05:37,462 --> 00:05:42,967 清教徒分離主義者 94 00:05:45,887 --> 00:05:47,930 在前往…” 95 00:05:50,892 --> 00:05:53,478 美枝,快來看 96 00:05:55,146 --> 00:05:57,607 個衰仔在認真溫書呢 97 00:05:58,066 --> 00:06:01,152 -他為什麼總是考不好? -他只是還沒開竅而已 98 00:06:03,613 --> 00:06:06,282 巴特,你要來不及上校車了 99 00:06:07,992 --> 00:06:09,243 (第一章,自由之夢) 100 00:06:09,410 --> 00:06:10,787 巴特小老弟,你臉色很難看 101 00:06:10,953 --> 00:06:13,331 奧托老哥,今天有個大考 但我還沒準備好 102 00:06:13,414 --> 00:06:15,041 你可以故意撞車 幫我拖一下時間嗎? 103 00:06:15,625 --> 00:06:17,835 小老弟,抱歉,我不能那麼做 104 00:06:17,919 --> 00:06:19,629 別擔心,你運氣好就會碰上了 105 00:06:20,213 --> 00:06:21,923 好吧,沒什麼好擔心 106 00:06:22,465 --> 00:06:24,217 只要找個死蠢先問答案 107 00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:25,551 就搞掂了 108 00:06:29,597 --> 00:06:32,183 妳看,他一定又沒溫書了 109 00:06:32,266 --> 00:06:35,186 他一定在想要怎麼從我們口中套答案 110 00:06:35,311 --> 00:06:38,189 -可悲的傢伙 -妳們早 111 00:06:38,439 --> 00:06:39,565 -早晨,巴特 -早晨,巴特 112 00:06:40,066 --> 00:06:43,069 我們來複習一下如何? 113 00:06:43,194 --> 00:06:46,739 我來考考妳們 朝聖者之船的名字是什麼? 114 00:06:46,864 --> 00:06:48,324 聖路易精神號 115 00:06:48,533 --> 00:06:51,244 -他們在哪裡上岸? -阿卡普高 116 00:06:51,327 --> 00:06:54,330 -他們為什麼離開英格蘭? -因為那裡有大老鼠 117 00:06:54,580 --> 00:06:56,749 厲害,妳們真是活歷史 118 00:07:00,795 --> 00:07:03,881 身為競爭者,我本不應該提醒你 119 00:07:03,965 --> 00:07:06,884 但她們剛才跟你講的答案 120 00:07:07,009 --> 00:07:10,138 -全部都是錯的 -你是說… 121 00:07:10,263 --> 00:07:12,557 找一隻猴子來寫 122 00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:15,518 搞不好分數都比你高 123 00:07:16,102 --> 00:07:17,478 真是多謝你 124 00:07:19,397 --> 00:07:21,983 大家將測驗卷傳落去 125 00:07:22,650 --> 00:07:23,651 有任何問題 126 00:07:23,734 --> 00:07:26,362 巴特,危機就是轉機 快想辦法 127 00:07:29,740 --> 00:07:34,954 -巴特,有什麼事嗎? -沒什麼,我要考… 128 00:07:41,377 --> 00:07:44,005 (機房) 129 00:07:44,630 --> 00:07:45,882 (佈告欄) 130 00:07:46,007 --> 00:07:47,008 (醫療室) 131 00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:48,968 小朋友,你怎麼了? 132 00:07:49,510 --> 00:07:53,806 -我肚好痛 -天啊,讓我看看 133 00:07:54,849 --> 00:07:56,350 (阿撒不魯靜脈炎症狀 一,腹部絞痛) 134 00:07:56,434 --> 00:07:58,269 -你的手會痛嗎? -兩雙手都很痛,老師 135 00:07:58,603 --> 00:08:00,229 眼睛會不會看不清楚? 136 00:08:00,688 --> 00:08:03,149 是誰在那裡,靠近點好嗎? 137 00:08:06,319 --> 00:08:07,320 什麼事,兒子? 138 00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:12,408 我還要再一碗布甸 這次要朱古力口味的 139 00:08:13,117 --> 00:08:16,078 不錯,你的食慾恢復了 140 00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:17,497 你還需要什麼嗎? 141 00:08:19,207 --> 00:08:22,960 -我想看電視 -沒問題,荷馬 142 00:08:23,044 --> 00:08:25,254 -做什麼? -把電視搬上來 143 00:08:25,379 --> 00:08:27,173 巴特的眼睛好了 144 00:08:28,508 --> 00:08:31,344 連我都想生病了 145 00:08:31,928 --> 00:08:33,596 巴特,不要再扮嘢了 146 00:08:33,679 --> 00:08:35,598 妳不要亂講 147 00:08:35,681 --> 00:08:38,226 醜婦終須見家翁 148 00:08:38,309 --> 00:08:40,394 有人會照我 149 00:08:41,687 --> 00:08:43,356 你好,米爾豪斯 學校今天有什麼大事嗎? 150 00:08:43,481 --> 00:08:46,192 沒什麼,就路易斯講了個笑話 讓理查笑到鼻噴了牛奶出來 151 00:08:46,651 --> 00:08:49,278 是嗎,那歷史考試呢? 152 00:08:49,403 --> 00:08:52,281 一定很簡單吧? 你第一題寫什麼? 153 00:08:53,908 --> 00:08:56,744 第二題呢?原來如此 154 00:09:00,206 --> 00:09:04,460 寫完了,克拉老師 妳別太驚訝 155 00:09:08,923 --> 00:09:11,759 天,你寫得米爾豪斯更差 156 00:09:11,884 --> 00:09:15,179 巴特,我再給你最後一次警告 157 00:09:16,097 --> 00:09:19,517 辛普森夫婦,這是我們的心理醫生 158 00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:21,811 -小羅倫普萊爾醫生 -你好,醫生 159 00:09:23,020 --> 00:09:25,690 我認為巴特的問題 160 00:09:25,856 --> 00:09:28,859 是因太過害怕失敗 161 00:09:29,110 --> 00:09:31,571 導致學習不良 162 00:09:31,821 --> 00:09:36,951 甚至出現反效果,讓他以此為傲 163 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:41,330 他的其中一個問題 是注意力不夠集中,以致於… 164 00:09:49,338 --> 00:09:51,757 巴特的歷史測驗 已經四次不及格了 165 00:09:51,966 --> 00:09:54,468 -你是有什麼心事嗎? -沒有 166 00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:58,139 其他人多少都有一點進步 167 00:09:58,347 --> 00:09:59,640 但你一直在原地打轉 168 00:09:59,765 --> 00:10:01,642 -有什麼原因嗎? -我不知道 169 00:10:02,059 --> 00:10:07,857 你看你考的是什麼成績 55分、42分、26分和12分? 170 00:10:07,982 --> 00:10:11,235 好,你們別再說了 171 00:10:11,360 --> 00:10:13,946 我知道,我好蠢,可以了嗎? 172 00:10:14,113 --> 00:10:15,323 你們以為我喜歡這樣嗎? 173 00:10:15,406 --> 00:10:17,867 沒事,巴特 你只是比較遲開竅而已 174 00:10:18,075 --> 00:10:19,827 事情有這麼簡單就好了 175 00:10:20,077 --> 00:10:22,747 儘管我非常不想這麼說 176 00:10:22,872 --> 00:10:25,583 但恐怕我得建議要讓巴特 177 00:10:26,167 --> 00:10:27,918 留班在四年級了 178 00:10:28,085 --> 00:10:30,713 什麼?我不要留班 我保證我會及格 179 00:10:31,130 --> 00:10:32,715 -妳覺得呢? -當然,這樣也好 180 00:10:32,798 --> 00:10:36,010 巴特,如果有幫助的話 181 00:10:36,469 --> 00:10:37,970 留班其實也沒那麼不好 182 00:10:38,054 --> 00:10:41,432 我認真的,我不要留班 我發誓我會及格 183 00:10:41,515 --> 00:10:45,353 看著我的眼睛,你們看到 我的真誠、恐懼與決心嗎? 184 00:10:45,436 --> 00:10:49,023 我對天發誓,一定會升上五年級 185 00:10:49,482 --> 00:10:52,568 換個角度想,萬一你真的留班了 起碼你的年紀比別人大 186 00:10:56,155 --> 00:10:59,533 快落車,小朋友們 不然我就要把你們帶回家了 187 00:11:01,035 --> 00:11:02,870 奧托,我一直很尊敬你 188 00:11:02,995 --> 00:11:04,914 你都會讓我們丟垃圾出窗 189 00:11:05,039 --> 00:11:06,582 還會在轉彎時甩尾 190 00:11:07,291 --> 00:11:11,253 沒辦法,壞習慣改不了 小朋友,你在煩惱什麼呢? 191 00:11:11,837 --> 00:11:14,715 我最近的考試都不合格 192 00:11:15,549 --> 00:11:17,176 如果我下次再肥佬 193 00:11:17,259 --> 00:11:19,929 他們就要我留班 194 00:11:20,012 --> 00:11:22,556 就這樣?別擔心,小朋友 195 00:11:22,640 --> 00:11:25,309 留班說不定會是你成世人最好的事 196 00:11:25,476 --> 00:11:28,854 像我就念了三次四年級 197 00:11:29,188 --> 00:11:33,859 而我現在可是個校車司機呢 198 00:11:34,819 --> 00:11:36,362 (春田小學) 199 00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:37,780 恐怕我要建議 200 00:11:37,863 --> 00:11:40,449 巴特留四年級了 201 00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:43,994 留四年級了… 留四年級了… 202 00:11:44,078 --> 00:11:47,832 好,小朋友 今天要上的是世界文學 203 00:11:48,207 --> 00:11:51,544 有人知道金銀島裡面的海盗 叫什麼名字嗎? 204 00:11:51,919 --> 00:11:53,421 巴特辛普森? 205 00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:56,173 老師,妳聽我說 我被診斷出胃潰瘍 206 00:11:56,382 --> 00:11:59,760 昨天被罰了一張紅單 明天還要去洗牙 207 00:11:59,969 --> 00:12:02,388 妳可不可以不要 再拿這海盜煩我了? 208 00:12:02,972 --> 00:12:06,016 -爸,他叫西爾弗 -我聽到了,巴特二世 209 00:12:06,267 --> 00:12:09,019 你們兩個放學後要留堂 210 00:12:10,312 --> 00:12:11,814 多謝,兒子 211 00:12:16,277 --> 00:12:19,780 可以幫我執波嗎? 喂,你聽不到嗎? 212 00:12:20,197 --> 00:12:23,701 -把球丟過來,書呆子 -不好意思,巴特 213 00:12:24,118 --> 00:12:26,412 我不太清楚棒球規則 214 00:12:26,579 --> 00:12:28,831 我以為不能亂碰場內的球 215 00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:35,254 好,我要繼續看《白鯨記》了 216 00:12:36,630 --> 00:12:38,507 -喂,馬丁 -我已經幫你撿球了 217 00:12:38,632 --> 00:12:40,259 不要再纏我了 218 00:12:40,426 --> 00:12:42,511 我想請你幫我補習,讓我考試合格 219 00:12:42,636 --> 00:12:46,557 以你的成績你確實需要幫忙 220 00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:48,726 但我為什麼要幫你? 221 00:12:48,851 --> 00:12:52,104 因為我可以幫你不被別人取笑 222 00:12:52,229 --> 00:12:54,398 有人笑我嗎? 223 00:12:55,566 --> 00:12:58,486 我一直以為我好受歡迎 224 00:12:58,694 --> 00:13:00,070 並沒有,看好了 225 00:13:03,991 --> 00:13:09,205 可是,我做過數學小老師 幫先生斟茶 226 00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:14,043 還在小息時登記名字 難道這些都沒有意義嗎? 227 00:13:14,126 --> 00:13:15,461 我再示範一次 228 00:13:18,047 --> 00:13:20,549 很好,我明了,巴特 229 00:13:20,716 --> 00:13:22,968 -那你會幫我嗎? -好 230 00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:26,639 好,我們先去看看你的書房 231 00:13:26,764 --> 00:13:28,265 -書房? -沒錯 232 00:13:28,349 --> 00:13:31,769 就是你遠離繁雜塵世的避難所 233 00:13:31,852 --> 00:13:34,480 那堆垃圾底下面就是了 234 00:13:35,356 --> 00:13:39,360 不、這樣不行 我們要先大掃除才可以 235 00:13:39,485 --> 00:13:41,654 仲要幫你買個盆栽 236 00:13:41,737 --> 00:13:44,448 書房裡沒有綠色植物不可 237 00:13:44,657 --> 00:13:45,991 (校車) 238 00:13:46,617 --> 00:13:48,118 -別坐這裡 -別坐這裡? 239 00:13:48,202 --> 00:13:51,789 高材生才坐在第一排 由現在起,你要坐到最後一排 240 00:13:51,956 --> 00:13:53,457 除了坐校車之外 241 00:13:53,582 --> 00:13:55,709 -上課和上教堂時也一樣 -為什麼? 242 00:13:55,793 --> 00:13:58,295 這樣大人才不知道你在做什麼 243 00:13:59,421 --> 00:14:01,215 我明了 244 00:14:01,340 --> 00:14:03,384 為非作歹的可能性 245 00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:05,803 與掌權者的距離成反比 246 00:14:05,928 --> 00:14:08,430 沒錯,但沒人會像你這樣說 247 00:14:26,198 --> 00:14:28,409 (代數,二次方程式) 248 00:14:28,492 --> 00:14:30,411 (可惡) 249 00:14:30,744 --> 00:14:31,662 (噴漆) 250 00:14:32,037 --> 00:14:33,873 (我的老師) 251 00:14:47,344 --> 00:14:50,264 漸入佳境 之後就要溫考試的範圍了 252 00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:56,312 估唔到將男仔關女廁 253 00:14:56,395 --> 00:14:58,772 會這麼刺激有趣 254 00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:02,776 看他叫得哭天搶地 這才是我想做的事 255 00:15:02,943 --> 00:15:04,695 這真是太好玩了 256 00:15:04,778 --> 00:15:06,989 太好了,馬丁 那我們什麼時候複習 257 00:15:07,072 --> 00:15:09,700 -明天的考試? -理什麼考試啊 258 00:15:09,783 --> 00:15:13,370 -人生苦短,我要及時行樂 -喂,你答應過我 259 00:15:15,164 --> 00:15:17,958 答應要幫你的馬丁已經不在了 260 00:15:18,042 --> 00:15:20,419 走,我們去遊樂場 261 00:15:20,502 --> 00:15:22,713 -耶,馬丁 -我都要去,馬丁 262 00:15:22,796 --> 00:15:25,382 馬丁 263 00:15:26,800 --> 00:15:28,344 (華盛頓橫渡德拉瓦河) 264 00:15:31,764 --> 00:15:35,684 -巴特,要上床了 -知道了 265 00:15:37,394 --> 00:15:38,896 我沒希望了 266 00:15:42,066 --> 00:15:44,944 老天爺啊,我已經走頭無路了 267 00:15:45,319 --> 00:15:47,237 雖然我平時調皮搗蛋 268 00:15:47,571 --> 00:15:51,784 但我不想因為成績太差而被留班 269 00:15:52,242 --> 00:15:56,163 請祢幫幫我,再給我一天的時間 270 00:15:56,372 --> 00:15:59,083 等我可以臨時抱佛腳 271 00:15:59,166 --> 00:16:02,670 希望明天罷課、紅雨警告或者落大雪 272 00:16:02,795 --> 00:16:04,880 只要讓明天能停課就好 273 00:16:05,005 --> 00:16:09,927 我知道這要求很過份 但只有祢能幫我了 274 00:16:10,010 --> 00:16:13,639 祢的好兄弟巴特十分感謝祢 275 00:16:32,700 --> 00:16:37,413 巴特,快起身,太陽曬到屁股了 276 00:16:37,871 --> 00:16:41,500 -我不要 -起身,外面落雪了 277 00:16:43,252 --> 00:16:45,629 早安,世界 278 00:16:46,005 --> 00:16:50,300 各位市民們大家早 歡迎收聽《馬爾早餐》,他是比爾 279 00:16:50,426 --> 00:16:51,885 -他是馬提 -歡迎各位 280 00:16:51,969 --> 00:16:53,554 一早來聽我們發噏風 281 00:16:53,762 --> 00:16:54,930 今朝的大雪 282 00:16:55,264 --> 00:16:56,765 相信大家都非常驚喜 283 00:16:57,933 --> 00:17:00,811 春田電力公司、春田瓦斯 以及春田水利局已宣布停班 284 00:17:00,978 --> 00:17:02,688 你怎麼忘了核電廠,比爾 285 00:17:02,813 --> 00:17:04,982 -拜託 -他們也停班了啊 286 00:17:05,357 --> 00:17:06,442 太好了 287 00:17:06,608 --> 00:17:10,112 然後是學生期待以久的消息 288 00:17:10,320 --> 00:17:14,867 春田市的各級學校… 好緊張,我不敢看了 289 00:17:15,951 --> 00:17:17,202 春田市的各級學校宣布… 290 00:17:17,411 --> 00:17:18,412 -拜託 -今日停課 291 00:17:18,537 --> 00:17:19,872 -太好了 -耶 292 00:17:23,792 --> 00:17:25,085 -回來 -戴好頂帽 293 00:17:25,210 --> 00:17:27,880 -將早餐食完 -著好雪靴 294 00:17:28,088 --> 00:17:29,715 卡哇邦嘎 295 00:17:29,798 --> 00:17:32,259 玩累了記得要休息一下 296 00:17:32,843 --> 00:17:35,095 -做什麼? -我聽到你昨晚的禱告,巴特 297 00:17:35,262 --> 00:17:38,432 這是你求的,現在靈驗了 298 00:17:38,932 --> 00:17:42,519 我書讀得不多,不清楚神究竟是什麼 299 00:17:42,603 --> 00:17:46,190 但我知道祂是一股 比爸媽還要偉大的力量 300 00:17:46,315 --> 00:17:49,485 -這樣你敢不還神嗎? -妳說得對 301 00:17:49,943 --> 00:17:53,572 我要還神、用功讀書 302 00:17:58,786 --> 00:18:01,371 我又沒損失什麼 只不過是玩得很累 303 00:18:01,622 --> 00:18:03,999 三番兩次爬到雪坡上 再滑下來而已 304 00:18:04,333 --> 00:18:05,542 那有什麼好玩? 305 00:18:20,015 --> 00:18:21,683 我好久沒玩得這麼開心了 306 00:18:23,352 --> 00:18:26,814 -捉到你了,伯恩斯先生 -可惡,你這乞兒仔 307 00:18:27,022 --> 00:18:29,608 要打雪仗放馬過來 308 00:18:29,817 --> 00:18:32,277 -史密瑟斯,自由開火 -遵命,老細 309 00:18:37,366 --> 00:18:38,450 (鑽石喬昆比) 310 00:18:38,575 --> 00:18:40,327 我在此宣布 311 00:18:40,452 --> 00:18:44,832 本日為“落雪日”,同時也是 本市有史以來最歡樂的日子 312 00:19:09,064 --> 00:19:10,816 讀書、讀書,我要讀書 313 00:19:15,070 --> 00:19:17,573 “第六章,到費城已四日之久 314 00:19:17,656 --> 00:19:20,450 首屆大陸會議 正面臨著艱鉅的工作 315 00:19:20,576 --> 00:19:22,828 代表們是否能接受這些 316 00:19:22,953 --> 00:19:24,830 深受美國人所支持的提議呢?” 317 00:19:25,247 --> 00:19:27,958 我們認為這些真理不言而喻 318 00:19:28,083 --> 00:19:31,378 “我們認為這些真理不言而喻 我們認為這些真理不言而喻” 319 00:19:31,628 --> 00:19:32,963 人人生而平等 320 00:19:33,505 --> 00:19:34,506 “人人生而平等” 321 00:19:34,673 --> 00:19:36,008 造物主賦予他們 322 00:19:36,091 --> 00:19:38,635 若干不可剝奪的權利 323 00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:41,346 大家快看,落雪了 324 00:19:41,555 --> 00:19:44,349 -六月飛雪? -這真是奇蹟 325 00:19:44,683 --> 00:19:46,935 各位同仁 我發明了一個叫做雪橇的好東西 326 00:19:47,102 --> 00:19:47,895 (別騎我) 327 00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:52,900 大家看 328 00:19:52,983 --> 00:19:55,569 漢考克正在雪地上簽名呢 329 00:20:00,282 --> 00:20:03,327 死仔,專心 你想留班嗎? 330 00:20:13,003 --> 00:20:14,630 再見,克拉老師 331 00:20:16,173 --> 00:20:17,382 (巴特辛普森) 332 00:20:18,383 --> 00:20:21,553 時間到了停筆,巴特 333 00:20:22,804 --> 00:20:24,681 可以請妳現在幫我改嗎? 334 00:20:24,765 --> 00:20:28,227 好,我讓“小紅”來看看 335 00:20:34,316 --> 00:20:36,902 59分,巴特 依然不及格 336 00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:39,738 不會吧,怎麼會這樣? 337 00:20:39,947 --> 00:20:43,951 我知道,又要再帶你一年了 真是人間煉獄 338 00:20:50,457 --> 00:20:51,792 怎麼了? 339 00:20:51,875 --> 00:20:54,670 我還以為你已經習慣了 340 00:20:54,878 --> 00:20:56,546 妳不明白 341 00:20:57,005 --> 00:21:00,509 我這次真的很認真,真的 342 00:21:00,634 --> 00:21:01,843 好了,別哭 343 00:21:02,552 --> 00:21:06,098 我已經盡全力了,還是不及格 344 00:21:06,181 --> 00:21:11,853 -那個,59分算是及格邊緣 -我是在騙自己,我就是個笨蛋 345 00:21:14,731 --> 00:21:16,817 現在我知道華盛頓在1754年 346 00:21:16,900 --> 00:21:19,987 於必需堡向法軍投降時的感受了 347 00:21:20,070 --> 00:21:22,572 -你說什麼? -就是那場 348 00:21:22,698 --> 00:21:24,283 知名的敗仗啊 349 00:21:25,033 --> 00:21:26,910 天啊,巴特,你答對了 350 00:21:27,244 --> 00:21:28,870 -那又如何? -你剛才將學到的知識 351 00:21:28,954 --> 00:21:31,498 活學活用,以你的程度來說 352 00:21:31,623 --> 00:21:35,502 真難得,我決定幫你加一分 353 00:21:35,627 --> 00:21:37,004 這樣才公平 354 00:21:37,212 --> 00:21:39,923 -妳是說我及格了? -摱車邊 355 00:21:40,841 --> 00:21:45,512 我及格了,我拿到“D”了 我及格了,太好了 356 00:21:46,972 --> 00:21:50,851 我及格了、我及格了 我拿到“D”了,我及格了 357 00:21:51,018 --> 00:21:56,106 我拿到“D”了,我及格了 我及格了、我… 358 00:21:57,441 --> 00:21:59,776 親了老師 359 00:22:03,864 --> 00:22:05,240 (丙) 360 00:22:06,199 --> 00:22:08,368 -仔,我們以你為傲 -謝了,爸 361 00:22:08,577 --> 00:22:11,330 有部份的功勞要算在老天爺頭上