1 00:00:04,379 --> 00:00:05,922 阿森一族 2 00:00:06,631 --> 00:00:07,799 (歡迎蒞臨春田核電廠) 3 00:00:11,219 --> 00:00:12,303 (春田小學) 4 00:00:14,764 --> 00:00:18,768 (我以後不會玩瀝青) 5 00:00:25,316 --> 00:00:26,860 (注意安全) 6 00:00:26,943 --> 00:00:28,778 (《媽媽雜誌》、小丑庫斯提麥片) 7 00:01:22,874 --> 00:01:24,876 北達科他州首都 8 00:01:24,959 --> 00:01:27,087 是以哪個德國統治者命名? 9 00:01:27,170 --> 00:01:28,922 -希特拉 -希特拉,北達科他? 10 00:01:29,005 --> 00:01:30,173 -俾斯麥 -俾斯麥 11 00:01:30,298 --> 00:01:31,341 希特拉? 12 00:01:31,424 --> 00:01:33,218 靚仔,我還是贏你 13 00:01:33,301 --> 00:01:37,764 下一題,意大利的國旗是由 紅、白與哪種顏色組成? 14 00:01:37,847 --> 00:01:39,474 -藍色、橙色、紅色、紫色 -黃色、黑色 15 00:01:39,557 --> 00:01:40,642 黑色、綠色 16 00:01:40,725 --> 00:01:42,936 -綠色 -我答對了 17 00:01:43,019 --> 00:01:45,939 讓我們休息一下 廣告時間 18 00:01:46,022 --> 00:01:47,482 請繼續收看本節目 19 00:01:47,982 --> 00:01:51,236 我原本以為掉落的頭髮就像 變心的女朋友有去無回 20 00:01:51,319 --> 00:01:53,488 直到我遇上“髮心色” 21 00:01:53,655 --> 00:01:56,074 他們用最新的生髮技術 讓我相信這世界上還有奇蹟 22 00:01:56,324 --> 00:01:57,492 什麼,奇蹟? 23 00:01:57,575 --> 00:01:59,035 他們有最新技術? 24 00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:01,204 使用“髮心色”,你將能隨心所欲 25 00:02:01,329 --> 00:02:04,082 變換髮型 26 00:02:04,165 --> 00:02:06,835 重振雄風,笑看風雲變 27 00:02:06,918 --> 00:02:09,337 寄5元至“髮心色”即獲免費傳單 28 00:02:09,420 --> 00:02:10,922 地址:猶他州長髮市生髮街485號 29 00:02:11,005 --> 00:02:13,424 頭髮、我要頭髮 30 00:02:13,758 --> 00:02:15,844 像大家一樣的頭髮 31 00:02:17,178 --> 00:02:19,055 (《玩髮光頭》、《生髮大師》 《生髮高手》、《濃密時光》) 32 00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:22,851 其實我覺得光頭都幾有型 33 00:02:23,059 --> 00:02:24,352 美枝,妳沒聽到嗎? 34 00:02:24,435 --> 00:02:26,187 他們用最新科技 35 00:02:26,312 --> 00:02:28,982 不是那些圖寶貨 36 00:02:29,065 --> 00:02:30,400 (《生髮高手》、《光頭剋星》) 37 00:02:32,277 --> 00:02:33,820 (生髮診所) 38 00:02:33,903 --> 00:02:37,490 讓我介紹“髮心色”的套裝組合 39 00:02:37,615 --> 00:02:40,118 有半年份的生髮劑 40 00:02:40,201 --> 00:02:41,452 倒吊靴 41 00:02:41,536 --> 00:02:42,829 頭皮按摩器 42 00:02:43,037 --> 00:02:44,330 還有一件T恤 43 00:02:44,414 --> 00:02:45,999 太好,幾多錢? 44 00:02:46,082 --> 00:02:47,208 總共是一千元整 45 00:02:47,333 --> 00:02:48,710 一千銀? 46 00:02:48,793 --> 00:02:50,461 太貴了 47 00:02:50,545 --> 00:02:54,632 不如那你試下符合你預算的其他產品 48 00:02:54,716 --> 00:02:55,967 但我必須先講明 49 00:02:56,050 --> 00:02:57,760 使用期間如果有生出任何毛 50 00:02:57,844 --> 00:02:59,554 純屬巧合 51 00:02:59,637 --> 00:03:01,723 一千蚊… 52 00:03:01,806 --> 00:03:03,224 還要每天擦 53 00:03:03,433 --> 00:03:05,268 按摩頭皮、倒吊 54 00:03:06,853 --> 00:03:08,479 算數 55 00:03:08,563 --> 00:03:10,023 你幫不上忙 56 00:03:11,357 --> 00:03:14,277 我對他說“算數 57 00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:15,737 你幫不上忙” 58 00:03:15,820 --> 00:03:18,781 -然後就開門走人 -哈,等他見識你的厲害 59 00:03:18,865 --> 00:03:22,785 可惡,塔塔醬又沒了 每次都只給一丁點 60 00:03:22,911 --> 00:03:25,496 藍尼,你還要塔塔醬嗎? 61 00:03:25,580 --> 00:03:28,458 -連醬都冇得點,真絕望 -不要發牢騷了,光頭佬 62 00:03:28,666 --> 00:03:32,003 可惡,你蝦我生不出頭髮嗎? 63 00:03:32,337 --> 00:03:34,923 別那麼哀怨,荷馬 64 00:03:35,006 --> 00:03:36,925 其實只要變通一下 把醫療保單改一改 65 00:03:37,008 --> 00:03:38,635 等公司幫你出錢就得啦 66 00:03:38,718 --> 00:03:39,928 等等,成張金牛呢! 67 00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:44,057 -被伯恩斯先生發現我就死梗了 -一千算什麼? 68 00:03:44,140 --> 00:03:46,559 對他而言不過是散銀 69 00:03:46,684 --> 00:03:49,312 對,而且你每週都有供強積金 70 00:03:49,395 --> 00:03:50,855 你有拿到什麼嗎? 71 00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:52,899 什麼都沒有,除了廣告信之外 72 00:03:52,982 --> 00:03:54,859 明明都有供款 73 00:03:54,943 --> 00:03:57,737 為什麼要讓手指被切掉的人 獨佔所有的好處? 74 00:03:57,987 --> 00:03:59,280 完全認同 75 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:04,577 我想用我的醫療保單買“髮心色” 76 00:04:04,702 --> 00:04:07,330 兄台,我不知道你從哪聽到這種怪招 77 00:04:07,413 --> 00:04:09,624 我們是合法經營的正派公司 78 00:04:09,749 --> 00:04:11,876 不可能讓你這樣亂搞 79 00:04:15,463 --> 00:04:18,174 15分鐘後到後巷等我 80 00:04:18,549 --> 00:04:19,926 一個人來 81 00:04:41,531 --> 00:04:44,325 上帝啊,請幫幫可憐的光頭佬吧 82 00:05:07,557 --> 00:05:08,850 我有頭髮了 83 00:05:09,142 --> 00:05:10,601 我有頭髮了 84 00:05:10,768 --> 00:05:12,645 我有頭髮了 85 00:05:14,272 --> 00:05:15,898 快看 86 00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:17,817 早晨,春田市 87 00:05:17,900 --> 00:05:19,902 早晨,溫菲爾德夫婦 88 00:05:19,986 --> 00:05:22,572 死流浪漢,修下你的頭髮 89 00:05:23,114 --> 00:05:25,283 早晨,老莫小酒館 90 00:05:25,366 --> 00:05:27,201 快看,總統來了 91 00:05:27,285 --> 00:05:28,619 大家早晨 92 00:05:28,703 --> 00:05:30,413 早晨 93 00:05:31,414 --> 00:05:34,542 大家早晨、春田市早晨 94 00:05:36,252 --> 00:05:37,795 -“髮心色” -“髮心色” 95 00:06:00,068 --> 00:06:01,652 (傑克男女髮廊,營業中) 96 00:06:03,404 --> 00:06:05,615 哇,荷馬辛普森 97 00:06:05,698 --> 00:06:07,867 你有20多年沒有來了吧? 98 00:06:08,076 --> 00:06:10,078 你的髮鬢呢? 99 00:06:10,411 --> 00:06:11,371 (《花花男子》) 100 00:06:11,454 --> 00:06:12,663 照舊,唔該 101 00:06:13,373 --> 00:06:14,957 他上班更開心了 102 00:06:15,041 --> 00:06:17,126 還有,我同妳們說 103 00:06:17,210 --> 00:06:20,046 他現在又生龍活虎了 104 00:06:20,129 --> 00:06:21,964 我不想想像那畫面 105 00:06:22,048 --> 00:06:24,384 我回來了,甜心 106 00:06:28,262 --> 00:06:29,764 快過來,妳這小壞壞 107 00:06:30,264 --> 00:06:33,059 喂,我家姐她們還在呢 108 00:06:33,434 --> 00:06:35,895 跟三位美麗的女士共進晚餐 109 00:06:36,020 --> 00:06:37,355 我真是太幸褔了 110 00:06:37,438 --> 00:06:39,899 你是荷馬嗎?天啊 111 00:06:39,982 --> 00:06:41,484 帕蒂,抹下口水擦 112 00:06:41,651 --> 00:06:42,860 妳好意思提我 113 00:06:42,985 --> 00:06:44,695 (歡迎蒞臨春田核電廠) 114 00:06:48,157 --> 00:06:50,993 荷馬,你變另一個人了 你去減肥嗎? 115 00:06:51,077 --> 00:06:53,121 是,你是不是曬黑了? 116 00:06:53,204 --> 00:06:55,123 我看出來了,你換了條新呔 117 00:06:56,666 --> 00:06:57,542 (禁止吸煙) 118 00:06:57,625 --> 00:07:00,628 廢柴,成班廢柴 全部都在混水摸魚 119 00:07:00,711 --> 00:07:03,381 別指望我會讓他們升職 120 00:07:03,464 --> 00:07:05,049 那樣會違反工會協定,老細 121 00:07:05,133 --> 00:07:07,510 每年要讓一名員工升職 122 00:07:07,593 --> 00:07:08,678 等等 123 00:07:08,761 --> 00:07:10,471 那個有為的後生仔是誰? 124 00:07:10,555 --> 00:07:12,640 我看看,好像是荷馬辛普森 125 00:07:12,723 --> 00:07:16,310 -只是他更年輕,也更有精神 -辛普森對吧? 126 00:07:17,311 --> 00:07:20,565 是舊可造之材 127 00:07:20,773 --> 00:07:22,900 給他個主管職位試下吧 128 00:07:23,317 --> 00:07:24,861 叫他進來 129 00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:26,612 廣播,荷馬辛普森 130 00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:29,657 你已晉升至主管 131 00:07:29,740 --> 00:07:31,951 給你三分鐘同前同事告別 132 00:07:32,034 --> 00:07:35,663 並前往503室 迎接光明璀燦的未來 133 00:07:41,627 --> 00:07:44,213 妳的履歷相當不錯 除了錯字之外 134 00:07:44,380 --> 00:07:46,382 妳還有什麼其它專長嗎? 135 00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:48,468 我很會幫主管按摩 136 00:07:48,551 --> 00:07:49,719 我可以示範給你看 137 00:07:49,969 --> 00:07:51,220 不、不用了 138 00:07:51,304 --> 00:07:52,638 謝謝妳,妳可以離開了 139 00:07:54,557 --> 00:07:56,058 -妳好 -你好,老公 140 00:07:56,142 --> 00:07:57,685 做阿頭的感覺如何? 141 00:07:57,768 --> 00:08:00,396 不好,每個來應徵祕書的女仔 142 00:08:00,521 --> 00:08:02,023 都想色誘我 143 00:08:02,982 --> 00:08:04,484 你好,辛普森先生 144 00:08:04,859 --> 00:08:06,027 我是卡爾 145 00:08:06,110 --> 00:08:07,737 他的聲音很好聽,用他 146 00:08:07,820 --> 00:08:09,530 -我覆你電話 -辛普森 147 00:08:09,614 --> 00:08:11,741 明天下午兩點要開會 148 00:08:11,991 --> 00:08:13,993 你不用開聲坐在那就好,明嗎? 149 00:08:14,118 --> 00:08:15,244 明白,史密瑟斯先生 150 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:17,079 懶巴閉 151 00:08:17,163 --> 00:08:18,289 你不屬於這裡 152 00:08:19,123 --> 00:08:21,709 你不屬於這裡 153 00:08:21,792 --> 00:08:23,252 你是個騙子、假貨 154 00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:25,671 大家遲早會看穿你的真面目 155 00:08:25,755 --> 00:08:27,590 -誰說? -你自己 156 00:08:27,673 --> 00:08:29,675 你的外表、聳肩的樣子 157 00:08:29,759 --> 00:08:32,762 你講話的方式 還有你的穿著 158 00:08:32,845 --> 00:08:35,515 你的西裝又cheap又肉酸 159 00:08:35,598 --> 00:08:37,725 我要你大聲向自己說 160 00:08:37,808 --> 00:08:39,393 "這是我應得的" 161 00:08:39,477 --> 00:08:40,853 "我愛我的工作" 162 00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:43,022 "我是上天的奇蹟" 163 00:08:43,105 --> 00:08:44,273 講出聲 164 00:08:44,357 --> 00:08:45,691 -"我…" -信我,荷馬 165 00:08:45,775 --> 00:08:46,776 我… 166 00:08:46,859 --> 00:08:48,319 大膽講出聲 167 00:08:48,402 --> 00:08:49,612 這是我應得的 168 00:08:49,695 --> 00:08:51,113 -大聲點 -這是我應得的 169 00:08:51,197 --> 00:08:54,867 -用吃奶的力氣說出來 -我是上天的奇蹟 170 00:08:54,951 --> 00:08:57,119 我要三星期假和交通津貼 171 00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:58,496 你被錄用了 172 00:08:58,579 --> 00:09:00,373 去shopping吧 173 00:09:02,708 --> 00:09:04,627 (皇家西裝,肥瘦均宜) 174 00:09:06,170 --> 00:09:07,588 哇,好看 175 00:09:07,713 --> 00:09:08,714 (兩套99元) 176 00:09:08,798 --> 00:09:11,509 西裝就是男人的戰袍 177 00:09:11,592 --> 00:09:14,720 著上它,告訴大家 “看看我” 178 00:09:14,804 --> 00:09:16,347 “都要聽我支笛” 179 00:09:16,430 --> 00:09:18,182 這裡有這種西裝嗎? 180 00:09:18,266 --> 00:09:19,350 沒有 181 00:09:21,018 --> 00:09:22,687 哇,不錯呢 182 00:09:22,770 --> 00:09:25,398 不,保持自然就好 辛普森先生 183 00:09:25,606 --> 00:09:27,233 不要縮肚 184 00:09:28,317 --> 00:09:30,319 你負責幫忙遮醜 185 00:09:35,741 --> 00:09:37,618 爸媽他們又開始親熱了 186 00:09:37,702 --> 00:09:39,161 我去上班,不然要遲到了 187 00:09:39,245 --> 00:09:41,080 週年快樂,荷馬 188 00:09:41,163 --> 00:09:43,874 今天是結婚週年嗎? 你肯定? 189 00:09:43,958 --> 00:09:45,459 別擔心,老公 190 00:09:45,543 --> 00:09:47,753 你最近升職,工作這麼忙 191 00:09:47,837 --> 00:09:49,088 會忘記也很正常 192 00:09:49,171 --> 00:09:51,090 辛普森太太,週年快樂 193 00:09:51,173 --> 00:09:53,884 對我而言 194 00:09:54,051 --> 00:09:57,013 妳最美麗 195 00:09:57,471 --> 00:10:00,141 對我而言 196 00:10:00,349 --> 00:10:01,601 妳最美麗 197 00:10:01,684 --> 00:10:02,977 妳知道嗎? 198 00:10:03,060 --> 00:10:04,145 喔,荷馬 199 00:10:04,270 --> 00:10:05,271 喂? 200 00:10:05,354 --> 00:10:07,690 辛普森先生,我是卡爾 201 00:10:07,815 --> 00:10:10,568 聽起來一切都很順利 202 00:10:10,693 --> 00:10:12,403 -那我就放心了 -都是你安排? 203 00:10:12,486 --> 00:10:14,905 無錯,希望不會太過火 204 00:10:14,989 --> 00:10:17,450 對我來說 205 00:10:18,159 --> 00:10:20,995 妳最美麗 206 00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:23,039 我愛你,荷馬 207 00:10:23,122 --> 00:10:26,208 我愛你,卡爾…美枝 208 00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:27,293 我們開始吧,史密瑟斯 209 00:10:27,376 --> 00:10:30,254 第一個議程 是關於生產力日漸低落 210 00:10:30,338 --> 00:10:32,256 以及職災率突破新高 211 00:10:32,381 --> 00:10:34,425 該死,大家有任何提議嗎? 212 00:10:34,508 --> 00:10:36,510 炒幾個廢柴,殺雞儆猴 213 00:10:36,594 --> 00:10:38,304 要不在飲水機裡加些咖啡因? 214 00:10:38,387 --> 00:10:40,056 這些是我會想出來的辦法 215 00:10:40,139 --> 00:10:42,183 你們不會用自己的豬腦嗎? 216 00:10:42,266 --> 00:10:44,769 還好我這裡有個 常常與基層接觸的上司 217 00:10:44,852 --> 00:10:46,729 -你 -你說的是他吧,老細 218 00:10:46,812 --> 00:10:49,857 就是你 你覺得我們該怎麼做? 219 00:10:49,940 --> 00:10:52,610 我認為可以從一件事做起 220 00:10:52,693 --> 00:10:54,362 廚房每週二 221 00:10:54,445 --> 00:10:56,280 都會供應炸魚柳 222 00:10:56,364 --> 00:10:58,574 炸魚柳?你講什麼? 223 00:10:58,658 --> 00:11:00,076 老細,將魚切頭切尾 224 00:11:00,159 --> 00:11:02,411 切成長條狀下去炸 就是炸魚柳 225 00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:04,163 我知道要點整炸魚柳 226 00:11:04,246 --> 00:11:05,623 講重點 227 00:11:05,706 --> 00:11:08,125 用來沾炸魚柳食的 228 00:11:08,209 --> 00:11:10,544 塔塔醬太少了 我每次都不夠用 229 00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:13,214 -別再浪費我們的時間了,辛普森 -你收聲,史密瑟斯 230 00:11:13,297 --> 00:11:14,590 你聽不出來他的重點嗎? 231 00:11:14,674 --> 00:11:16,592 掌握員工的胃,就能掌握員工的心 232 00:11:16,676 --> 00:11:18,386 塔塔醬成本只有三毫子 233 00:11:18,469 --> 00:11:20,596 卻能為我們慳成千粒鐘的工時開銷 234 00:11:20,680 --> 00:11:22,932 我喜歡你的建議,辛普森 235 00:11:23,349 --> 00:11:26,686 就幫那群廢柴加多些塔塔醬 236 00:11:27,687 --> 00:11:29,980 大家,盡情享用塔塔醬吧 237 00:11:30,064 --> 00:11:32,441 把餐盤給我,別急 238 00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:34,026 份量充足,絕對夠吃 239 00:11:34,652 --> 00:11:36,862 (職災率創新低 生產力提升15個百分點) 240 00:11:36,946 --> 00:11:37,822 太好了 241 00:11:37,947 --> 00:11:39,240 (管理層正視醬料問題) 242 00:11:39,323 --> 00:11:41,534 意料不及,辛普森提出的改革 243 00:11:41,617 --> 00:11:42,827 這麼快就有成效 244 00:11:42,993 --> 00:11:45,621 老細,工傷降低的數字 245 00:11:45,705 --> 00:11:48,374 跟辛普森待在基層時 所造成的數字相同 246 00:11:48,457 --> 00:11:51,961 而提升後的生產力 就同辛普森放假時相同 247 00:11:52,044 --> 00:11:54,171 親愛的史密瑟斯 248 00:11:54,964 --> 00:11:56,465 你眼紅他嗎? 249 00:11:58,092 --> 00:11:59,427 是時候 250 00:11:59,760 --> 00:12:01,095 讓辛普森 251 00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:02,805 擁有鎖匙了 252 00:12:03,180 --> 00:12:06,475 辛普森先生 你再也不用在這裡上廁所了 253 00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:08,060 他們決定要給你 254 00:12:08,144 --> 00:12:09,645 鎖匙 255 00:12:10,312 --> 00:12:11,897 鎖匙? 256 00:12:11,981 --> 00:12:13,441 -他拿到鎖匙 -誰拿到鎖匙? 257 00:12:14,942 --> 00:12:15,693 (高層洗手間) 258 00:12:30,124 --> 00:12:33,961 太棒了,大開眼界 259 00:12:35,713 --> 00:12:36,964 喔,你來了 260 00:12:37,047 --> 00:12:38,799 我昨晚追一部紀錄片 261 00:12:38,883 --> 00:12:40,760 內容主要是在講述 262 00:12:40,885 --> 00:12:42,428 “沙漠之狐”隆美爾將軍 263 00:12:42,511 --> 00:12:44,764 以及他的厲害手段 264 00:12:44,847 --> 00:12:46,140 幫我拿毛巾,辛普森 265 00:12:46,265 --> 00:12:48,309 -等我來,老細 -我要的是辛普森 266 00:12:49,643 --> 00:12:51,145 沒問題,伯恩斯先生 267 00:12:51,687 --> 00:12:53,063 很好,辛普森 268 00:12:53,147 --> 00:12:55,983 -跟在我後面 -沒問題,老細 269 00:13:15,628 --> 00:13:17,755 (荷馬辛普森,機密文件) 270 00:13:31,977 --> 00:13:33,896 捉到你了,辛普森 271 00:13:39,735 --> 00:13:43,489 荷馬,你把錢都用在置裝和生髮水 272 00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:45,825 我們要不要留些錢以備不時之需? 273 00:13:45,908 --> 00:13:48,536 不時之需? 美枝,妳多慮了 274 00:13:48,619 --> 00:13:51,121 辛普森家的前途一片光明 275 00:13:51,205 --> 00:13:53,082 我可愛的女兒想要什麼嗎? 276 00:13:53,165 --> 00:13:55,960 我想要平安的生活和穩定的日子 277 00:13:56,794 --> 00:13:57,837 買隻小馬給妳呢? 278 00:13:57,920 --> 00:13:59,004 好 279 00:13:59,088 --> 00:14:00,089 (禁止進入) 280 00:14:00,172 --> 00:14:01,465 我希望你能 281 00:14:01,549 --> 00:14:03,425 對主管施展你的魔法 282 00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:05,511 發表一段演講讓他們博命工作 283 00:14:05,594 --> 00:14:06,720 無問題 284 00:14:06,804 --> 00:14:09,223 非常好,你忙吧,辛普森 285 00:14:12,810 --> 00:14:14,895 伯恩斯先生 我要報告一個壞消息 286 00:14:14,979 --> 00:14:16,605 我們有一位主管 287 00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:18,774 用公司保險騙了一千元鉅款 288 00:14:18,899 --> 00:14:21,068 什麼?太沒良心了 289 00:14:21,443 --> 00:14:24,613 連我買按摩器的錢都沒有了 290 00:14:24,697 --> 00:14:25,823 他的手法是什麼? 291 00:14:25,948 --> 00:14:27,741 他拿保單買一款 292 00:14:27,825 --> 00:14:28,951 叫做“髮心色”的生髮水 293 00:14:29,034 --> 00:14:30,953 謝謝你的說明,科學老師 294 00:14:31,036 --> 00:14:32,788 我知道“髮心色”是什麼 295 00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:35,708 你去讓他知道盗用公款的下場 296 00:14:35,791 --> 00:14:37,376 這是我的榮辛,老細 297 00:14:38,168 --> 00:14:40,671 卡爾,快幫幫我 伯恩斯先生要我 298 00:14:40,754 --> 00:14:42,715 對主管發表一場演講 299 00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:44,174 -嗯 -幹什麼! 300 00:14:44,258 --> 00:14:45,342 我只是剛好經過 301 00:14:45,426 --> 00:14:47,303 -順便提提,你被炒魷魚了 -什麼? 302 00:14:47,386 --> 00:14:50,180 我們公司還沒好心到 303 00:14:50,264 --> 00:14:51,557 坐視鉅額詐騙案不理 304 00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:53,350 收拾收捨,趕快離開吧 辛普森 305 00:14:54,393 --> 00:14:55,519 等等,史密瑟斯先生 306 00:14:55,644 --> 00:14:58,439 這是我做,不關他事 307 00:14:58,606 --> 00:15:00,190 -你做的? -你說什麼? 308 00:15:00,274 --> 00:15:03,027 辛普森先生對此事完全不知情 309 00:15:03,152 --> 00:15:04,778 我會負全責 310 00:15:04,862 --> 00:15:06,739 真的?哼 311 00:15:07,072 --> 00:15:09,992 既然這樣,你被開除了 你這個無名小卒 312 00:15:10,075 --> 00:15:11,827 這裡是一千元 313 00:15:13,287 --> 00:15:15,539 喂,你為什麼要管這件事? 314 00:15:15,623 --> 00:15:18,292 我自有我的理由 315 00:15:19,585 --> 00:15:22,588 卡爾,你救了我一命 為什麼? 316 00:15:22,755 --> 00:15:25,925 我今天有做了什麼好事嗎? 317 00:15:26,008 --> 00:15:29,094 沒有,我只是做我該做的事 318 00:15:29,178 --> 00:15:31,013 就像軍人要效忠國家 319 00:15:31,096 --> 00:15:33,641 如果有子彈射向我上司 320 00:15:33,807 --> 00:15:38,312 我會用身體擋在前面 粉身碎骨、在所不惜 321 00:15:38,395 --> 00:15:40,064 謝謝你,卡爾 322 00:15:40,648 --> 00:15:42,650 大恩不言謝 323 00:15:42,733 --> 00:15:44,401 送我走吧 324 00:15:46,278 --> 00:15:47,696 再會了,卡爾 325 00:15:47,947 --> 00:15:49,406 我會掛住你 326 00:15:49,490 --> 00:15:51,033 再會了,辛普森先生 327 00:15:55,579 --> 00:15:58,415 辛普森先生你有帶遮嗎? 328 00:15:58,582 --> 00:16:00,000 慘,我沒帶 329 00:16:00,167 --> 00:16:01,251 拿去吧 330 00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:12,972 慘了 331 00:16:13,097 --> 00:16:15,766 卡爾不在了,但至少你的頭髮還在 332 00:16:15,849 --> 00:16:17,434 沒錯,頭髮才是最重要 333 00:16:17,518 --> 00:16:18,686 慘了,演講該怎麼辦? 334 00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:25,150 (“髮心色”) 335 00:16:25,234 --> 00:16:26,485 找到了 336 00:16:30,823 --> 00:16:33,200 你們在做什麼,死靚仔? 337 00:16:33,409 --> 00:16:35,577 -不會吧? -一定是假鬚 338 00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:39,707 這是成熟大人才有的鬍子 339 00:16:44,294 --> 00:16:45,963 巴特,你在做什麼? 340 00:16:46,046 --> 00:16:47,548 噢 341 00:16:48,257 --> 00:16:49,550 -你這個… -慘了 342 00:16:55,139 --> 00:16:56,473 我掐死你 343 00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:58,308 爸,我愛你 344 00:16:58,392 --> 00:17:01,395 可惡,來這招 345 00:17:01,937 --> 00:17:05,149 好,我不會掐死你 但我要告訴你三件事 346 00:17:05,232 --> 00:17:07,401 讓你內疚成世 347 00:17:07,484 --> 00:17:09,069 你毀了你爸的人生 348 00:17:09,153 --> 00:17:10,779 你害我們家冇飯開 349 00:17:10,863 --> 00:17:12,990 還有,禿頭會遺傳 350 00:17:13,198 --> 00:17:14,324 真的嗎? 351 00:17:19,872 --> 00:17:22,499 荷馬,你為什麼不打去藥房… 352 00:17:22,583 --> 00:17:25,252 因為我沒有一千元 但是妳有,對不對? 353 00:17:25,335 --> 00:17:27,713 妳有存一些私己錢,對吧? 354 00:17:27,796 --> 00:17:30,382 妳說過要以備不時之需的,對不對? 355 00:17:30,549 --> 00:17:31,633 荷馬 356 00:17:33,927 --> 00:17:36,472 爸英雄變狗熊了 357 00:17:48,025 --> 00:17:51,403 荷馬,我很遺憾 358 00:17:52,988 --> 00:17:55,407 演講5分鐘後開始,辛普森 359 00:17:55,491 --> 00:17:57,451 你不會借尿遁吧? 360 00:17:58,285 --> 00:17:59,620 慘了 361 00:18:01,330 --> 00:18:02,498 (辛普森先生) 362 00:18:02,581 --> 00:18:04,458 “親愛的辛普森先生 363 00:18:04,541 --> 00:18:06,543 我把你演講的重點 364 00:18:06,627 --> 00:18:08,796 都寫在一張小卡片上 365 00:18:08,879 --> 00:18:10,714 所有重點 366 00:18:10,798 --> 00:18:12,466 都照順序排好了 367 00:18:12,549 --> 00:18:14,259 祝你順利 368 00:18:14,343 --> 00:18:18,180 你是春田市中 非常特別的一個人 369 00:18:18,263 --> 00:18:20,557 你忠實的僕人 370 00:18:20,682 --> 00:18:21,850 卡爾敬上” 371 00:18:21,934 --> 00:18:23,811 -祝你好運,先生 -卡爾 372 00:18:23,977 --> 00:18:26,188 我還以為剛才的聲音 是我幻想出來的 373 00:18:26,313 --> 00:18:27,606 你怎麼會在這裡? 374 00:18:27,689 --> 00:18:30,192 我是來跟會計部的女士們道別的 375 00:18:30,275 --> 00:18:32,569 是嗎,謝謝你的稿子,卡爾 376 00:18:32,653 --> 00:18:34,780 但我做不到了 看我現在的樣子 377 00:18:34,947 --> 00:18:37,658 -看來你什麼都沒學到 -什麼意思? 378 00:18:37,783 --> 00:18:40,452 你不明白嗎? 塔塔醬事件、廁所鎖匙 379 00:18:40,536 --> 00:18:42,329 幫老細遞毛巾 380 00:18:42,412 --> 00:18:44,623 全是因為你的努力 不是因為頭髮 381 00:18:44,706 --> 00:18:47,626 因為你相信自己 現在也一樣 382 00:18:47,709 --> 00:18:49,378 不,我做不到 我是個蠢材 383 00:18:49,461 --> 00:18:50,963 -不,你不是 -你又知? 384 00:18:51,046 --> 00:18:54,049 因為我母親教我 不可以錫一個蠢蛋 385 00:18:54,633 --> 00:18:55,717 卡爾 386 00:18:55,801 --> 00:18:57,803 發威的時候到了,獅子王 387 00:19:00,639 --> 00:19:03,058 現在,讓我們歡迎 388 00:19:03,183 --> 00:19:06,228 核電界最閃亮的年輕新星 帶來他獨特的觀點 389 00:19:06,311 --> 00:19:07,729 歡迎荷馬辛普森 390 00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:12,359 搞什麼,那個死光頭是誰? 391 00:19:12,442 --> 00:19:14,236 辛普森去哪了? 392 00:19:14,570 --> 00:19:15,696 他就是辛普森,老細 393 00:19:17,447 --> 00:19:18,866 我等陣要做的事 394 00:19:18,949 --> 00:19:21,118 可能會讓你們覺得我好巔 395 00:19:21,201 --> 00:19:22,327 他真的發巔了! 396 00:19:22,411 --> 00:19:25,539 但這座電廠每分每秒 都在做這件事 397 00:19:25,622 --> 00:19:29,001 庫存管控不佳、生產方式過時 398 00:19:29,084 --> 00:19:32,254 我一年可以幫公司慳百萬成本 399 00:19:32,337 --> 00:19:34,381 只要學習日本人的精神 400 00:19:34,506 --> 00:19:36,675 落實自我管理 401 00:19:36,758 --> 00:19:40,554 -這光頭佬講什麼? -這笑話不好笑 402 00:19:40,762 --> 00:19:43,098 真勇!他連頭髮都沒有 403 00:19:43,182 --> 00:19:44,474 還敢教我們管理公司 404 00:19:44,558 --> 00:19:46,310 鈾礦的開採效率過低… 405 00:19:46,393 --> 00:19:48,896 我們可由外國市場用合理價格採購 406 00:19:48,979 --> 00:19:50,772 長期來看 407 00:19:50,856 --> 00:19:52,649 不僅可抵消一次性成本 408 00:19:52,900 --> 00:19:55,777 儲蓄淨額可達五千… 409 00:19:58,488 --> 00:19:59,489 很大一筆錢 410 00:19:59,573 --> 00:20:01,575 馬上到伯恩斯先生的辦公室 411 00:20:05,120 --> 00:20:06,455 看你這副衰樣 412 00:20:06,538 --> 00:20:10,918 快看,這不是我們 最閃亮的年輕新星嗎? 413 00:20:11,418 --> 00:20:14,421 你真是把我的臉丟盡了,辛普森 414 00:20:14,504 --> 00:20:16,298 我應該當場就炒你 415 00:20:16,381 --> 00:20:17,299 但是 416 00:20:17,466 --> 00:20:18,717 我不會這麼做 417 00:20:19,092 --> 00:20:20,385 為什麼? 418 00:20:20,844 --> 00:20:22,763 你覺得我幾歲了,辛普森? 419 00:20:23,222 --> 00:20:25,182 大概102歲吧 420 00:20:25,307 --> 00:20:27,434 我只有81歲 421 00:20:27,684 --> 00:20:30,145 你可能不相信 422 00:20:30,229 --> 00:20:31,980 但在我後生時 423 00:20:32,064 --> 00:20:33,190 (年輕歲月) 424 00:20:33,273 --> 00:20:37,361 我也有成頭金髮 425 00:20:37,486 --> 00:20:40,781 我曾是校園的風雲人物 426 00:20:40,864 --> 00:20:43,325 但沒有頭髮後,我便一蹶不振 427 00:20:43,408 --> 00:20:44,826 阿森啊 428 00:20:44,993 --> 00:20:50,165 你我都是雄性禿的受害者 429 00:20:50,249 --> 00:20:53,293 所以我決定大發慈悲 讓你回原本的工作崗位 430 00:20:53,460 --> 00:20:56,046 什麼?謝謝你、太感謝了 431 00:20:56,129 --> 00:20:58,173 快滾吧,免得我改變主意 432 00:20:59,091 --> 00:21:00,467 那我滾了 433 00:21:04,263 --> 00:21:06,348 荷馬,你還未睡? 434 00:21:06,431 --> 00:21:08,350 這是我一生最清醒的時刻 435 00:21:08,433 --> 00:21:09,476 怎麼了? 436 00:21:09,559 --> 00:21:10,978 妳看不出來嗎? 437 00:21:11,061 --> 00:21:14,022 我只能繼續做沒前途的工作 438 00:21:14,106 --> 00:21:15,857 孩子們會恨我的 439 00:21:15,941 --> 00:21:18,735 我答應要買給他們的東西都沒有了 440 00:21:18,819 --> 00:21:21,488 妳也不會再像之前那樣愛我 441 00:21:21,655 --> 00:21:23,865 因為我又光頭又樣衰 442 00:21:23,949 --> 00:21:25,367 荷馬啊 443 00:21:25,701 --> 00:21:28,537 你努力工作,讓我們衣食無缺 444 00:21:28,620 --> 00:21:30,580 孩子們會明白的 445 00:21:30,664 --> 00:21:31,999 還有? 446 00:21:32,291 --> 00:21:34,209 妳還會愛我嗎? 447 00:21:34,293 --> 00:21:36,295 荷馬啊,我… 448 00:21:36,378 --> 00:21:37,879 -過來 -做什麼? 449 00:21:37,963 --> 00:21:39,881 -過來 -喔 450 00:21:40,882 --> 00:21:47,347 對我而言,你最美麗 451 00:21:48,265 --> 00:21:53,312 對我而言,你最美麗 452 00:21:53,895 --> 00:21:55,647 你知道嗎? 453 00:21:55,731 --> 00:21:56,606 噢 454 00:21:56,690 --> 00:21:59,609 你是我期盼的一切 455 00:22:00,235 --> 00:22:03,280 我是妳想要的所有 456 00:22:03,530 --> 00:22:07,075 -對我而言 -對妳而言 457 00:22:07,701 --> 00:22:08,910 -你最美麗 -我最美麗