1
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阿森一族

2
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什麼事？

3
00:00:28,987 --> 00:00:31,906
你說想要活在沒有鋅的世界，吉米

4
00:00:31,990 --> 00:00:33,950
現在你部車沒有電瓶

5
00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:36,077
但是我答應貝蒂6點要去接她

6
00:00:36,161 --> 00:00:37,954
我最好打電話給她

7
00:00:44,002 --> 00:00:45,003
抱歉，吉米

8
00:00:45,086 --> 00:00:48,882
沒了鋅，撥輪電話就不能用了

9
00:00:48,965 --> 00:00:51,259
天啊，我做了什麼？

10
00:00:55,430 --> 00:00:56,681
再想想，吉米

11
00:00:56,765 --> 00:00:59,225
手槍上的撞針的原料是…

12
00:00:59,434 --> 00:01:01,102
沒錯，鋅

13
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快回來，鋅

14
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快回來

15
00:01:05,356 --> 00:01:06,649
快回來

16
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鋅，快回來

17
00:01:09,527 --> 00:01:10,403
鋅

18
00:01:10,487 --> 00:01:12,363
鋅，什麼？

19
00:01:13,740 --> 00:01:15,366
原來是發夢

20
00:01:15,950 --> 00:01:19,120
謝天謝地我還住在一個有電話

21
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汽車電瓶，手槍，還有很多
用鋅做的東西的世界

22
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好核突，他在挖鼻屎

23
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如果還有人想學有關鋅的知識
歡迎留下來

24
00:01:34,219 --> 00:01:35,929
我們什麼都可以談

25
00:01:36,888 --> 00:01:38,473
我可以幫你寫功課

26
00:01:44,687 --> 00:01:46,981
孤寂之心大廚的一人份濃湯

27
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一張六合彩，阿普

28
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克拉巴佩爾老師，我自從
把價格加倍以後就沒見過妳了

29
00:01:53,113 --> 00:01:54,614
-還在教書嗎？
-我看看

30
00:01:57,033 --> 00:01:58,576
還要教至少一天

31
00:02:02,330 --> 00:02:04,499
找到問題了，油箱裡有糖

32
00:02:04,582 --> 00:02:06,251
妳的前夫又出擊了

33
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（《春田雜誌》庫斯提嚴選
春田市至好辣肉醬）

34
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（我們與沙林傑的對話）

35
00:02:16,970 --> 00:02:18,596
（在春田市一日用一蚊）

36
00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:20,223
（尋找愛情嗎？）

37
00:02:20,306 --> 00:02:21,683
自訂廣告？

38
00:02:21,808 --> 00:02:22,684
有何不可？

39
00:02:22,767 --> 00:02:24,352
或者會好好玩，當好玩吧

40
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快點

41
00:02:29,315 --> 00:02:30,984
接電話

42
00:02:31,067 --> 00:02:32,277
我要男人

43
00:02:36,614 --> 00:02:38,449
我的眼睛

44
00:02:40,660 --> 00:02:42,245
夠了，同學

45
00:02:43,037 --> 00:02:44,330
同學

46
00:02:44,956 --> 00:02:46,166
好吧

47
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:49,669
我也可以這樣等下去

48
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:54,549
停手

49
00:02:54,632 --> 00:02:58,344
同學，讓我們一起
歡迎我們的特別來賓

50
00:02:58,428 --> 00:03:01,806
來自旋轉大王YoYo的托德卡本特

51
00:03:04,392 --> 00:03:08,354
同學，這個是yo yo
有點無聊吧？

52
00:03:08,438 --> 00:03:10,815
根本比不上打機好玩

53
00:03:11,107 --> 00:03:12,692
是嗎？

54
00:03:12,775 --> 00:03:16,738
請歡迎旋轉大王的選手

55
00:03:17,363 --> 00:03:18,823
神奇先生

56
00:03:20,825 --> 00:03:22,035
亮亮

57
00:03:26,247 --> 00:03:28,082
她好靚

58
00:03:28,541 --> 00:03:30,001
零重力

59
00:03:33,755 --> 00:03:35,590
眼鏡蛇

60
00:03:38,718 --> 00:03:40,595
他們一定都是百萬富翁

61
00:03:41,221 --> 00:03:43,765
我敢說他們有很多女朋友

62
00:03:44,057 --> 00:03:46,726
我質疑這場活動的教育意義

63
00:03:46,809 --> 00:03:48,811
等他們幫人入油維生的時候

64
00:03:48,895 --> 00:03:50,647
這會是他們少有的愉快回憶

65
00:04:05,954 --> 00:04:08,331
我們的下一段表演，要不要…

66
00:04:08,414 --> 00:04:10,667
-請校長上台？
-不要

67
00:04:13,503 --> 00:04:15,129
小心點

68
00:04:16,631 --> 00:04:17,840
打到我隻耳了

69
00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:20,426
別動，否則你可能會受傷

70
00:04:20,718 --> 00:04:23,471
-那個yoyo要幾多錢？
-我不在乎

71
00:04:23,554 --> 00:04:24,514
拜拜

72
00:04:24,681 --> 00:04:25,556
拜拜

73
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多謝你，亮亮

74
00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:29,143
等等

75
00:04:29,227 --> 00:04:31,271
-這個不是你
-這是以前的亮亮

76
00:04:31,354 --> 00:04:34,732
快上車，我們還要去三間學校

77
00:04:34,857 --> 00:04:36,567
快點，走了

78
00:04:41,489 --> 00:04:43,616
（第二日）

79
00:04:49,622 --> 00:04:51,457
這就是你的絕招？

80
00:04:51,541 --> 00:04:53,960
不，這才是我的絕招

81
00:05:01,634 --> 00:05:02,552
謝謝

82
00:05:03,761 --> 00:05:04,971
美枝，過來

83
00:05:08,850 --> 00:05:10,226
妳相信嗎？

84
00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:13,646
我很快就可以辭職
靠這孩子維生了

85
00:05:13,730 --> 00:05:17,942
什麼？有誰是靠玩yoyo發達的？

86
00:05:18,026 --> 00:05:20,361
當勞特朗普？不是

87
00:05:20,653 --> 00:05:22,363
阿諾龐馬？不是

88
00:05:22,572 --> 00:05:24,532
比爾哥士比？不是

89
00:05:26,576 --> 00:05:27,744
“在海上度過了兩個月”

90
00:05:27,827 --> 00:05:29,787
“清教徒的水和食物都快用盡”

91
00:05:29,871 --> 00:05:30,747
是，尼爾森

92
00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:32,248
他們有YoYo嗎？

93
00:05:32,332 --> 00:05:34,375
他們沒有YoYo

94
00:05:34,459 --> 00:05:36,044
“當他們在普利茅斯岩靠岸時”

95
00:05:36,127 --> 00:05:38,755
“受到了友善的
萬帕諾亞格人歡迎”

96
00:05:38,838 --> 00:05:40,340
印地安人有YoYo嗎？

97
00:05:40,465 --> 00:05:42,675
他們也沒有YoYo，夠了

98
00:05:42,759 --> 00:05:45,887
我聽夠了YoYo

99
00:05:45,970 --> 00:05:47,889
從現在開始，我不會接受讀書報告

100
00:05:47,972 --> 00:05:49,807
科學作品，立體模型

101
00:05:49,932 --> 00:05:52,894
或是任何關於YoYo的主題

102
00:05:52,977 --> 00:05:54,896
夠清楚了嗎？

103
00:05:56,856 --> 00:06:00,151
巴特，今天有什麼新招嗎？

104
00:06:00,234 --> 00:06:01,152
只有一個

105
00:06:01,319 --> 00:06:04,072
我稱之為“摘醃黃瓜”

106
00:06:04,155 --> 00:06:06,157
我先熱身，然後…

107
00:06:11,245 --> 00:06:12,372
不是我做的

108
00:06:13,623 --> 00:06:18,336
別為妳的魚擔心，靚妹
牠們去了更好的地方

109
00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:22,173
巴特，罰你一個月留校觀察

110
00:06:22,256 --> 00:06:27,303
克拉貝寶老師，臭臭和皺皺的死
讓大家都很傷心

111
00:06:27,387 --> 00:06:28,888
但是人生還是要過

112
00:06:28,971 --> 00:06:31,516
如果你可以把我的YoYo還給我

113
00:06:31,599 --> 00:06:34,936
巴特，如果你是我
你會還YoYo嗎？

114
00:06:35,937 --> 00:06:37,647
還給你，呃你的

115
00:06:37,730 --> 00:06:38,648
還你

116
00:06:38,856 --> 00:06:40,316
呃你的

117
00:06:42,735 --> 00:06:44,779
-你會嗎？
-絕對會

118
00:06:52,286 --> 00:06:56,124
你什麼事啦，女人？
你的自訂廣告說你在找男人

119
00:06:56,207 --> 00:06:58,084
你找到了男人中的極品

120
00:06:58,167 --> 00:06:59,836
不知道，或者我期待的

121
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同你照片裡的人不同

122
00:07:01,921 --> 00:07:03,548
別被我的年齡騙到

123
00:07:03,631 --> 00:07:05,800
就因為我的屋頂上有點白雪…

124
00:07:05,883 --> 00:07:08,136
我忘了下一句是什麼

125
00:07:08,719 --> 00:07:10,388
一個月留校觀察

126
00:07:10,471 --> 00:07:11,681
她會付出代價的

127
00:07:12,056 --> 00:07:14,392
找到問題了

128
00:07:14,475 --> 00:07:17,061
有人把馬里布史黛西的頭卡在裡面

129
00:07:17,145 --> 00:07:20,064
艾娜，教師休息室的快樂時光到了

130
00:07:20,148 --> 00:07:21,315
等等

131
00:07:30,491 --> 00:07:32,869
“1加1等於2？”

132
00:07:32,952 --> 00:07:37,999
“剛離婚的小四教師
希望邂逅18－60歲的男人”

133
00:07:38,416 --> 00:07:40,084
“主題：救我”

134
00:07:40,793 --> 00:07:44,964
“寫給402號信箱的艾娜卡”

135
00:07:46,382 --> 00:07:47,967
（春田養老院）

136
00:07:50,219 --> 00:07:51,804
親愛的艾娜

137
00:07:52,096 --> 00:07:57,810
我從來沒回信給自訂廣告過
但是我覺得你難以抗拒

138
00:07:58,227 --> 00:07:59,770
我的名字是…

139
00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:04,400
伍德羅

140
00:08:05,067 --> 00:08:06,861
我喜歡拖手仔

141
00:08:06,944 --> 00:08:08,863
和燭光晚餐

142
00:08:09,822 --> 00:08:12,825
還有，我憎死YoYo

143
00:08:13,367 --> 00:08:14,994
伍德羅

144
00:08:20,041 --> 00:08:21,876
或者要將狗放入來

145
00:08:22,001 --> 00:08:24,378
美枝，狗喜歡留在外面

146
00:08:27,882 --> 00:08:30,801
-我覺得牠需要間狗屋
-是啊，但是能怎麼辦呢？

147
00:08:30,885 --> 00:08:34,013
我看我們能用50元
買間不錯的狗屋

148
00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:37,308
美枝，妳是狗屋木匠的工具人

149
00:08:37,391 --> 00:08:38,476
我不是

150
00:08:38,559 --> 00:08:39,894
妳是

151
00:08:39,977 --> 00:08:44,190
妳被電視上的那些狗屋廣告洗腦了

152
00:08:44,273 --> 00:08:47,151
我知道了，我幫牠起一間狗屋

153
00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:48,736
我不知道

154
00:08:48,819 --> 00:08:50,071
別擔心

155
00:08:50,154 --> 00:08:52,073
我剛畫了一幅設計圖

156
00:08:52,156 --> 00:08:53,741
我介紹吓

157
00:08:53,991 --> 00:08:55,368
這是門

158
00:08:55,451 --> 00:08:57,036
牠從這裡行入去

159
00:08:57,119 --> 00:08:58,829
這是屋頂

160
00:08:58,913 --> 00:09:01,082
還有這個開心的東西是太陽

161
00:09:01,374 --> 00:09:03,292
它把光照在狗屋上，看到嗎？

162
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:06,504
-今天的留校觀察如何？
-不錯

163
00:09:06,587 --> 00:09:08,506
我開始習慣用地板打蠟機了

164
00:09:09,215 --> 00:09:11,425
（春田雜誌自訂廣告部伍德羅收）

165
00:09:11,884 --> 00:09:12,760
喔耶

166
00:09:12,885 --> 00:09:15,221
親愛的伍德羅，我承認我很好奇

167
00:09:15,304 --> 00:09:17,223
你跟我認識的別的男人不同

168
00:09:17,306 --> 00:09:20,726
對啊，我是美國第28任總統

169
00:09:20,810 --> 00:09:23,229
但是我在自訂廣告有些不好的經歷

170
00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:26,816
所以我想要認識你多些，請速回

171
00:09:26,899 --> 00:09:29,652
這張照片會讓你的筆動起來

172
00:09:31,112 --> 00:09:33,531
你與影印機有個約會

173
00:09:35,283 --> 00:09:36,492
可惡的木板

174
00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:37,493
該死

175
00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:40,746
去死吧

176
00:09:41,497 --> 00:09:44,917
今天有個人到鋪頭來要換1蚊散銀

177
00:09:45,001 --> 00:09:47,253
我不小心給了他三個25分硬幣

178
00:09:47,336 --> 00:09:49,422
我用了一成個下晝才找到他

179
00:09:49,505 --> 00:09:51,257
托德，想要來點綜合蔬菜嗎？

180
00:09:51,340 --> 00:09:52,550
死都不要

181
00:09:53,009 --> 00:09:54,093
你剛說什麼？

182
00:09:54,176 --> 00:09:56,429
我說，我才不要該死的蔬菜

183
00:09:56,512 --> 00:10:00,057
OK，今天不講聖經故事

184
00:10:03,311 --> 00:10:04,854
你會不會太嚴厲了？

185
00:10:04,937 --> 00:10:07,106
你嫁給我的時候就知道我的脾氣了

186
00:10:08,149 --> 00:10:10,276
內德佛蘭德斯打電話來

187
00:10:10,359 --> 00:10:13,738
如果又是那白癡硬幣，我…

188
00:10:14,363 --> 00:10:15,406
喂，內德

189
00:10:15,740 --> 00:10:19,076
很抱歉打擾你，嗱喳牧師
但是我有個問題

190
00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:22,496
我兒子托德剛說他不要吃
“該死的蔬菜”

191
00:10:22,580 --> 00:10:24,874
你知道小孩都不喜歡食菜

192
00:10:25,082 --> 00:10:27,376
-什麼菜？蘆筍嗎？
-不是，牧師

193
00:10:27,460 --> 00:10:29,420
重點是他用字不對

194
00:10:29,503 --> 00:10:30,671
對

195
00:10:30,755 --> 00:10:34,133
小朋友通常會從某些地方學這些話

196
00:10:34,216 --> 00:10:37,678
找到那個人，介紹《聖經》給他

197
00:10:37,762 --> 00:10:38,971
聖經的哪裡？

198
00:10:39,055 --> 00:10:41,098
第900頁

199
00:10:41,182 --> 00:10:42,266
但是牧師…

200
00:10:43,309 --> 00:10:44,352
該死的佛蘭德斯

201
00:10:46,812 --> 00:10:48,522
-麗莎，有時間嗎？
-好

202
00:10:48,606 --> 00:10:51,025
假如我要寫信給一個女仔

203
00:10:51,108 --> 00:10:53,694
但是我已經把會寫的寫完了
我還能寫些什麼？

204
00:10:53,778 --> 00:10:57,198
你在暗戀某個神秘人嗎？

205
00:10:57,281 --> 00:10:58,282
拜託

206
00:10:58,366 --> 00:10:59,241
-是泰芮嗎？
-不是

207
00:10:59,325 --> 00:11:00,368
-是雪芮嗎？
-不是

208
00:11:00,451 --> 00:11:03,037
-是那個戴著矯正眼罩的女仔嗎？
-不是

209
00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:05,122
是那個交換學生米克斯帕嗎？

210
00:11:05,206 --> 00:11:08,834
不是，不是我喜歡的人，是…功課

211
00:11:08,918 --> 00:11:09,794
最好是

212
00:11:09,919 --> 00:11:12,755
巴特，我們來寫功課吧

213
00:11:16,050 --> 00:11:19,387
真是的，卡特中士
我沒辦法整好你的吉普車

214
00:11:19,470 --> 00:11:21,305
但或者這能夠彌補你

215
00:11:26,769 --> 00:11:27,895
他都看這個嗎？

216
00:11:27,978 --> 00:11:30,106
他以前還看《大衛與歌利亞》

217
00:11:30,189 --> 00:11:32,525
但是他覺得會說話的狗是褻瀆神明

218
00:11:32,608 --> 00:11:34,360
（可能的負面影響－汽車貼紙
嬤嬤，電視）

219
00:11:34,777 --> 00:11:36,779
媽，你有留爸寫給你的情書嗎？

220
00:11:36,862 --> 00:11:39,073
我當然有留

221
00:11:39,156 --> 00:11:41,242
其實只有一封

222
00:11:41,325 --> 00:11:44,328
是他從某個釀酒廠寄給我的明信片

223
00:11:44,412 --> 00:11:45,746
（達夫釀酒廠見識史上最大的拉環）

224
00:11:46,288 --> 00:11:50,584
“或者是喝太多啤酒了，美枝
但是你的屁股超性感”

225
00:11:50,668 --> 00:11:53,546
“這裡有賣大的軟蝴蝶餅”

226
00:11:55,131 --> 00:11:57,425
“5蚊？算數吧”

227
00:11:57,758 --> 00:12:00,261
我從沒見過爸的這一面

228
00:12:01,887 --> 00:12:03,597
你在想些什麼，克拉老師

229
00:12:03,681 --> 00:12:05,099
我只是在想…

230
00:12:05,182 --> 00:12:06,934
你不會有興趣的

231
00:12:07,017 --> 00:12:08,728
說來聽啊，有時候說出來會有幫助

232
00:12:10,146 --> 00:12:12,606
我只是希望能遇見一個男人

233
00:12:12,690 --> 00:12:15,860
他會喜歡我早上起床時的樣子

234
00:12:15,943 --> 00:12:17,695
會因為我講笑話而笑

235
00:12:17,778 --> 00:12:19,363
-幫我整車
-是喔

236
00:12:19,613 --> 00:12:24,243
“親愛的艾娜
你的照片正到我暈陀陀”

237
00:12:24,785 --> 00:12:28,330
“老實講，你的屁股性感到爆”

238
00:12:29,123 --> 00:12:32,752
“昨天早上
我把你的照片貼在車房裡”

239
00:12:32,835 --> 00:12:35,880
“讓我有了整火咀的動力”

240
00:12:37,715 --> 00:12:39,467
我們終於起好佈道院了

241
00:12:39,550 --> 00:12:42,553
村民終於有祈禱的地方了

242
00:12:42,636 --> 00:12:44,638
收禾捆回家

243
00:12:44,722 --> 00:12:46,640
收禾捆回家

244
00:12:46,724 --> 00:12:48,976
我們必要歡樂

245
00:12:49,143 --> 00:12:50,978
收禾捆回家

246
00:12:51,103 --> 00:12:52,813
也不是哥哥的關係

247
00:12:52,897 --> 00:12:54,315
這很確定了

248
00:12:54,398 --> 00:12:56,233
該死的爛釘

249
00:12:56,484 --> 00:12:58,235
萬能膠，黏住我屁股啦

250
00:12:59,320 --> 00:13:00,780
你這混…

251
00:13:00,863 --> 00:13:03,032
你他…

252
00:13:03,115 --> 00:13:05,242
-荷馬？
-怎樣，佛蘭德斯？

253
00:13:05,326 --> 00:13:07,745
我恐怕要跟你抱怨一下

254
00:13:07,828 --> 00:13:10,664
如果說的是你的攝影機
我早不見了，OK？

255
00:13:11,332 --> 00:13:15,586
不是，我是來跟你討論你的言行

256
00:13:15,669 --> 00:13:16,921
你講什麼鬼？

257
00:13:17,004 --> 00:13:19,673
荷馬，我們偶爾都會生氣

258
00:13:19,799 --> 00:13:22,676
會暴怒，然後爆句粗口

259
00:13:22,843 --> 00:13:25,179
所以我也不想太苛責你

260
00:13:25,262 --> 00:13:27,848
但是我希望你不要在我兒子面前做

261
00:13:27,932 --> 00:13:29,975
拜託，佛蘭德斯

262
00:13:30,059 --> 00:13:34,605
我也沒抱怨你的…鬚啊

263
00:13:35,189 --> 00:13:36,690
我的鬚怎麼了？

264
00:13:37,399 --> 00:13:40,486
讓你看起來像是想藏什麼

265
00:13:40,569 --> 00:13:42,071
-什麼？
-大家都在說話

266
00:13:42,154 --> 00:13:43,781
很多人

267
00:13:43,864 --> 00:13:45,032
好吧，先生

268
00:13:45,241 --> 00:13:46,659
我們來講好

269
00:13:46,742 --> 00:13:48,285
我去剃鬚

270
00:13:48,369 --> 00:13:50,788
如果你不再爆粗，可以嗎？

271
00:13:50,871 --> 00:13:53,624
遵命，死蠢艦長

272
00:13:53,958 --> 00:13:58,379
現在回到殖民劇院的
《突尼西亞之二》

273
00:13:59,338 --> 00:14:01,006
我的愛人

274
00:14:01,090 --> 00:14:04,260
百萬個詩人，用百萬年

275
00:14:04,343 --> 00:14:07,012
也只能描繪出你美貌的3/8

276
00:14:07,429 --> 00:14:09,265
慢點，法國佬

277
00:14:09,390 --> 00:14:10,683
真是挖到寶了

278
00:14:11,475 --> 00:14:15,312
“百萬個詩人，用百萬年”

279
00:14:15,396 --> 00:14:17,898
你真幸運，什麼時候要見他？

280
00:14:18,023 --> 00:14:19,942
首先我要叫他寄張照片給我

281
00:14:20,025 --> 00:14:22,611
如果他看起來正常，那我就要收網了

282
00:14:25,239 --> 00:14:26,490
（1969年國家冰球聯盟明星球員）

283
00:14:28,325 --> 00:14:29,535
著好溜冰鞋，高迪

284
00:14:29,618 --> 00:14:30,703
你要上場了

285
00:14:30,786 --> 00:14:32,037
（我所有的愛，伍德羅）

286
00:14:32,121 --> 00:14:34,164
美枝，想聽個好笑的事嗎？

287
00:14:34,832 --> 00:14:37,293
佛蘭德斯說我成日講粗口

288
00:14:39,670 --> 00:14:41,005
美枝，你沒有笑

289
00:14:41,088 --> 00:14:42,673
或者他說得對

290
00:14:42,756 --> 00:14:44,466
真是驚訝啊

291
00:14:44,550 --> 00:14:46,427
美枝企在佛蘭德斯那邊

292
00:14:46,510 --> 00:14:48,512
我們就不能好好聊天

293
00:14:48,596 --> 00:14:50,931
而你卻不用提到
你的英雄內德佛蘭德斯嗎？

294
00:14:51,015 --> 00:14:53,684
-是你先提起內德佛蘭德斯的
-這些都過去了

295
00:14:53,767 --> 00:14:56,312
美枝，或者我偶爾會講粗口

296
00:14:56,395 --> 00:14:59,773
但是是神把我造成這樣
我現在也老到無法改變了

297
00:14:59,857 --> 00:15:00,774
並不是

298
00:15:00,858 --> 00:15:04,486
我爸從海軍退伍的時候
也是開口埋口都是粗口

299
00:15:04,570 --> 00:15:07,114
差點讓他丟了BB攝影師的工作

300
00:15:07,197 --> 00:15:10,993
所以我媽在廚房放了個粗口處罰罐

301
00:15:11,076 --> 00:15:14,455
他每次爆粗就要放25分錢進去

302
00:15:14,538 --> 00:15:16,290
-你覺得呢？
-美枝

303
00:15:16,373 --> 00:15:19,752
自我進步一直是我的熱誠

304
00:15:19,835 --> 00:15:21,462
拿罐子出來

305
00:15:23,088 --> 00:15:26,133
-如果被榔頭搥到手依然要付錢嗎？
-對，荷馬

306
00:15:26,216 --> 00:15:27,885
-那如果我著火了呢？
-不用，荷馬

307
00:15:27,968 --> 00:15:29,845
如果我看到天上有怪東西呢？

308
00:15:29,929 --> 00:15:30,804
要，荷馬

309
00:15:30,888 --> 00:15:32,723
那我們親熱的時候呢？

310
00:15:32,848 --> 00:15:33,891
那就沒關係

311
00:15:34,683 --> 00:15:37,603
親愛的伍德羅
我們見面的時候到了

312
00:15:37,686 --> 00:15:39,396
我們何不一齊食餐飯？

313
00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:42,900
之後可以到我家試吓家常便飯

314
00:15:44,568 --> 00:15:45,861
哎呀，什麼鬼

315
00:15:46,153 --> 00:15:48,364
迫不及待的艾娜

316
00:15:49,114 --> 00:15:51,075
她等很久了

317
00:15:51,158 --> 00:15:52,701
是收成的時候了

318
00:15:52,785 --> 00:15:56,455
“當我讀你的信
我覺得你就在我面前看我”

319
00:15:57,957 --> 00:15:58,874
巴特，頭低下

320
00:15:58,958 --> 00:16:00,000
是，老師

321
00:16:00,334 --> 00:16:02,252
艾娜，在見面前的每一秒

322
00:16:02,336 --> 00:16:04,213
都像是千萬枝針扎著我的心頭

323
00:16:04,296 --> 00:16:06,924
星期六晚上8點
與我在鍍金松露相見

324
00:16:07,007 --> 00:16:09,426
或者我們晚點會引起一陣風暴

325
00:16:10,010 --> 00:16:12,096
飢渴的伍迪

326
00:16:23,232 --> 00:16:29,863
（《厄尼需要腎臟》）

327
00:16:39,832 --> 00:16:42,459
我感覺有部分是我的錯

328
00:16:49,842 --> 00:16:51,677
-荷馬，那張是20元
-該…

329
00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:52,970
（粗口處罰罐）

330
00:16:56,724 --> 00:16:57,891
你這狗…

331
00:17:00,602 --> 00:17:03,063
荷馬，我欠你一份情

332
00:17:03,147 --> 00:17:05,649
我一把鬍子剃掉

333
00:17:05,733 --> 00:17:07,776
就有人找我去拍廣告

334
00:17:07,943 --> 00:17:11,155
同你講，這些支票一直進來
簡直像搶錢

335
00:17:11,280 --> 00:17:12,156
你這可惡的混…

336
00:17:14,783 --> 00:17:16,201
你覺得怎樣，麗莎？

337
00:17:16,285 --> 00:17:18,037
狗要怎麼入去？

338
00:17:18,120 --> 00:17:19,371
牠只要…

339
00:17:27,171 --> 00:17:29,339
（地球儀蠟）

340
00:17:30,716 --> 00:17:33,010
伍德羅，你怎麼能放我飛機？

341
00:17:33,093 --> 00:17:35,721
克拉老師，無論是何人
你都不需要他

342
00:17:35,804 --> 00:17:37,848
這附近還是有很多好男人

343
00:17:37,931 --> 00:17:38,807
說一個

344
00:17:38,891 --> 00:17:41,185
-斯金納校長如何？
-西摩爾？

345
00:17:41,977 --> 00:17:44,772
這麼說吧，他媽媽不讓他出來玩

346
00:17:44,855 --> 00:17:46,482
那佛特納教練呢？

347
00:17:50,110 --> 00:17:51,945
工友威利呢？

348
00:17:52,029 --> 00:17:54,448
我還是別跟你說
那個人有什麼癖好吧

349
00:17:55,032 --> 00:17:57,993
巴特，你是我生命中
最接近是男人的人

350
00:17:58,744 --> 00:18:02,414
實在是太悲哀了，我都想哭了

351
00:18:11,173 --> 00:18:13,342
可惡，手指公斷了

352
00:18:14,676 --> 00:18:18,388
真是，我要去打破傷風針了

353
00:18:18,931 --> 00:18:23,977
我不會爆粗
但是我要踢爆這間狗屋

354
00:18:26,522 --> 00:18:29,149
爸，與你的技術無關

355
00:18:29,233 --> 00:18:31,318
但是我們買了間新狗屋給你

356
00:18:31,401 --> 00:18:32,653
錢哪來？

357
00:18:32,736 --> 00:18:34,905
粗口處罰罐的錢就夠多了

358
00:18:35,572 --> 00:18:38,951
如果看看狗屋裡
還能找到一個驚喜

359
00:18:40,202 --> 00:18:42,037
瑪姬，真得意

360
00:18:42,121 --> 00:18:43,664
不是，是她後面

361
00:18:45,082 --> 00:18:47,626
啤酒，你怎樣估到？

362
00:18:48,001 --> 00:18:49,878
瑪姬在哪裡？

363
00:18:49,962 --> 00:18:51,713
瑪姬在哪裡？

364
00:18:52,339 --> 00:18:54,007
瑪姬在這裡

365
00:18:56,176 --> 00:19:00,389
媽，有點超前進度了
但我需要戀愛方面的協助

366
00:19:01,098 --> 00:19:04,726
我的小寶貝交女朋友了

367
00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:06,937
我就知道

368
00:19:07,020 --> 00:19:08,689
巴特，你的女朋友是誰？

369
00:19:08,772 --> 00:19:10,023
克拉貝寶老師

370
00:19:12,860 --> 00:19:15,237
巴特，這是你的老師？

371
00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:17,656
我應該常去教師之夜

372
00:19:18,407 --> 00:19:19,283
荷馬

373
00:19:19,366 --> 00:19:21,702
巴特，你這樣做真殘忍

374
00:19:21,785 --> 00:19:24,955
仔，你要去同你老師講真話

375
00:19:25,038 --> 00:19:27,332
不，荷馬，真話會讓她難落台

376
00:19:27,416 --> 00:19:30,919
美枝，我會這麼說是因為
我以為你希望我這麼說

377
00:19:31,003 --> 00:19:33,088
或者我們該再寫封信給她

378
00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:35,924
一封道別，但能讓她感受到愛的信

379
00:19:36,008 --> 00:19:37,509
大家讓開

380
00:19:38,093 --> 00:19:40,762
細膩的情書是我的專長

381
00:19:40,846 --> 00:19:44,516
“親愛的寶貝，歡迎來到鴿子村”

382
00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:46,393
“人口－你”

383
00:19:46,476 --> 00:19:47,603
我們都來幫忙

384
00:19:48,812 --> 00:19:51,231
“雖然我會在柬埔寨
幫嬰兒接種疫苗”

385
00:19:51,315 --> 00:19:53,025
“我的心永遠在你身邊”

386
00:19:53,108 --> 00:19:56,320
超唔妥，要不要寫
“鱷魚咬了我塊面”？

387
00:19:56,403 --> 00:20:00,324
太恐怖了，而且當一個女人
愛著男人的時候

388
00:20:00,449 --> 00:20:03,160
她不會在乎他的臉被鱷魚咬

389
00:20:03,243 --> 00:20:05,120
我會記得你說過這句話，美枝

390
00:20:06,538 --> 00:20:09,708
好，”我之後五年都不能見你”

391
00:20:09,791 --> 00:20:12,211
“因為我要耕種海中植物”

392
00:20:12,794 --> 00:20:16,882
“我必須快點寫完這封信
因為我只剩下4分鐘生命”

393
00:20:16,965 --> 00:20:20,802
四個簡單的字，”我是同志”

394
00:20:20,928 --> 00:20:23,597
荷馬，我再說最後一次
我不會這樣寫

395
00:20:24,348 --> 00:20:29,102
“每次聽到微風拂過
風都會輕訴著一個名字，艾娜”

396
00:20:29,186 --> 00:20:31,104
非常好，麗莎

397
00:20:31,605 --> 00:20:32,773
“PS－我是同志”

398
00:20:34,608 --> 00:20:35,817
要怎麼結束？

399
00:20:35,901 --> 00:20:38,987
要不要寫”流傳永久的愛”？

400
00:20:40,572 --> 00:20:41,657
真是甜美

401
00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:43,742
荷馬，你這個製糖機

402
00:20:43,825 --> 00:20:45,369
你這個小…

403
00:20:58,966 --> 00:21:00,676
等等

404
00:21:00,759 --> 00:21:01,760
（艾娜）

405
00:21:03,845 --> 00:21:06,640
“最親愛的艾娜，我必須離開你”

406
00:21:06,723 --> 00:21:09,142
“為什麼？我不能說”

407
00:21:09,226 --> 00:21:12,020
“去哪兒？你不能知道”

408
00:21:12,104 --> 00:21:13,563
“我要怎麼到那裡？”

409
00:21:13,689 --> 00:21:15,274
“我還沒決定”

410
00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:17,776
“但是我能告訴你一件事”

411
00:21:17,859 --> 00:21:20,028
“每次聽到微風拂過”

412
00:21:20,112 --> 00:21:22,698
“風都會輕訴著一個名字，艾娜”

413
00:21:28,745 --> 00:21:31,915
巴特，今天天氣好好
我們到外面去吧

414
00:21:31,999 --> 00:21:32,874
就這麼約定了

415
00:21:40,299 --> 00:21:42,968
（高迪豪職涯數據）