1 00:00:03,044 --> 00:00:04,462 ♪ The Simpsons ♪ 2 00:00:09,342 --> 00:00:10,635 D'oh! 3 00:00:10,719 --> 00:00:12,512 -Aah! -(tires screech) 4 00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:45,503 (chanting) All we own we owe. 5 00:00:45,587 --> 00:00:49,215 All we own we owe. 6 00:00:49,299 --> 00:00:50,592 Shh! 7 00:00:50,675 --> 00:00:53,636 (chanting softly) All we own we owe. 8 00:00:53,720 --> 00:00:58,016 All we own we owe. 9 00:01:00,477 --> 00:01:02,437 (groaning) 10 00:01:03,855 --> 00:01:05,440 ♪ Tra-la-la la-la-la ♪ 11 00:01:05,523 --> 00:01:06,941 ♪ Tra-la-la-la-la ♪ 12 00:01:07,025 --> 00:01:10,487 I am the happiest boy there is. Aren't I, Bobo? 13 00:01:13,198 --> 00:01:15,658 Happy! Come here, Happy. 14 00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:16,993 Yes, Mummsy? 15 00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:20,163 Happy, would you like to continue living with us, 16 00:01:20,246 --> 00:01:21,998 your loving natural parents? 17 00:01:22,082 --> 00:01:25,877 Or would you rather live with this twisted, loveless billionaire? 18 00:01:27,670 --> 00:01:30,423 Let's roll. 19 00:01:30,507 --> 00:01:32,759 Wait! You forgot your bear, 20 00:01:32,842 --> 00:01:35,220 a symbol of your lost youth and innocence! 21 00:01:35,303 --> 00:01:37,514 (sighs) Oh, well. 22 00:01:37,597 --> 00:01:39,265 At least we still have his little brother, George. 23 00:01:39,349 --> 00:01:41,017 ♪ Bum-bum-bum bum ♪ 24 00:01:41,101 --> 00:01:43,311 ♪ Oh, the sun shines bright on my old Kentucky home ♪ 25 00:01:43,394 --> 00:01:44,646 ♪ Bum-bum-bum bum ♪ 26 00:01:44,729 --> 00:01:46,898 Trust me, it'll be funny when I'm an old man. 27 00:01:53,446 --> 00:01:55,490 (groans) 28 00:01:55,573 --> 00:01:58,326 I want my teddy. 29 00:02:02,914 --> 00:02:07,961 Bobo. Bobo. 30 00:02:08,044 --> 00:02:11,673 Oh, it's you. The bedpan's under my pillow. 31 00:02:11,756 --> 00:02:13,675 Who's Bobo, sir? 32 00:02:13,758 --> 00:02:16,010 Bobo? (stammers) 33 00:02:16,094 --> 00:02:19,347 I meant Lobo. Sheriff Lobo. 34 00:02:19,430 --> 00:02:21,057 They never should have canceled that show. 35 00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:22,725 I see. On another topic, 36 00:02:22,809 --> 00:02:24,561 preparations for your birthday have begun. 37 00:02:24,644 --> 00:02:27,230 -I won't get what I really want. -No one does. 38 00:02:28,940 --> 00:02:33,695 ♪ Happy birthday, Mr. Smithers ♪ 39 00:02:33,778 --> 00:02:36,072 (Smithers moans) 40 00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:38,992 Lobo. Lobo. 41 00:02:39,075 --> 00:02:40,994 Bring back Sheriff Lobo! 42 00:02:41,077 --> 00:02:43,872 Lobo. Lobo! (screams) 43 00:02:43,955 --> 00:02:44,956 What, Homie? 44 00:02:45,039 --> 00:02:47,500 Oh, no, Burns' birthday! 45 00:02:47,584 --> 00:02:51,045 -What's wrong? -Every time Mr. Burns has a birthday, 46 00:02:51,129 --> 00:02:53,756 all his employees have to help out at the party. 47 00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:57,218 And I always get some terrible job. 48 00:02:57,302 --> 00:02:59,596 Where is that dreaded piñata? 49 00:02:59,679 --> 00:03:02,891 Ow! Ow! Ow! Missed me. Heh heh. Ow. 50 00:03:04,851 --> 00:03:06,352 (grumbles) 51 00:03:06,436 --> 00:03:09,189 (people laughing) 52 00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:12,483 It's not funny. 53 00:03:12,567 --> 00:03:14,903 And the one in my pants really hurts. 54 00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:20,366 That man who's getting all those laughs, Smithers, who is he? 55 00:03:20,450 --> 00:03:22,327 Homer Simpson, sir. One of the carbon blobs 56 00:03:22,410 --> 00:03:23,912 from sector 7G. But I don't think that-- 57 00:03:23,995 --> 00:03:27,832 I want this Simpson fellow to perform comedy at my party. 58 00:03:27,916 --> 00:03:31,252 I must harness his fractured take on modern life. 59 00:03:31,336 --> 00:03:35,131 Fine, sir. I'll get him started on some snappy Sinbad-esque material. 60 00:03:35,215 --> 00:03:37,800 (laughs) 61 00:03:37,884 --> 00:03:40,220 I'm so funny. This is gonna be great. 62 00:03:40,303 --> 00:03:42,096 What are you doing? 63 00:03:42,180 --> 00:03:44,515 I'm writing a delicious send-up of Mr. Burns 64 00:03:44,599 --> 00:03:45,975 for his birthday party. 65 00:03:46,059 --> 00:03:47,644 Is "poo-poo" one word or two? 66 00:03:47,727 --> 00:03:49,145 (laughing) 67 00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:50,813 I don't think it's a good idea 68 00:03:50,897 --> 00:03:52,899 to humiliate your boss on his birthday. 69 00:03:52,982 --> 00:03:55,735 Actually, Mom, a tweaking of Mr. Burns' foibles, 70 00:03:55,818 --> 00:03:57,278 if done with the greatest of care, 71 00:03:57,362 --> 00:03:59,822 could earn Dad a special place in the old man's heart. 72 00:03:59,906 --> 00:04:04,244 Well, I also do a delightful impression of him. 73 00:04:04,327 --> 00:04:09,415 I paint a frowny face on my butt and pull down my pants. 74 00:04:09,499 --> 00:04:10,625 BOTH: Yeah! 75 00:04:10,708 --> 00:04:13,878 (concerned groaning) 76 00:04:18,091 --> 00:04:21,803 Now, I'm not saying Mr. Burns is incontinent-- 77 00:04:21,886 --> 00:04:23,346 (chuckles) Incontinent. 78 00:04:24,639 --> 00:04:26,015 Too rich. 79 00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:27,684 Does either of you know what "incontinent" means? 80 00:04:27,767 --> 00:04:30,561 -Lisa, don't spoil our fun. -Come on, dear, it's time to go. 81 00:04:30,645 --> 00:04:32,021 Okay, stupid. 82 00:04:32,105 --> 00:04:34,274 Homer, you've got to stop insulting everyone, 83 00:04:34,357 --> 00:04:35,900 especially your boss. 84 00:04:35,984 --> 00:04:38,653 Marge, the comedy roast is an American tradition. 85 00:04:38,736 --> 00:04:42,740 It's what gives us the freedom to criticize our social betters. 86 00:04:42,824 --> 00:04:45,868 Hey, Flanders, you smell like manure! 87 00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:48,246 Uh-oh. Better cancel that dinner party tonight. 88 00:04:48,329 --> 00:04:50,373 Thanks for the nose news, neighbor. 89 00:04:50,456 --> 00:04:53,376 (groaning) 90 00:04:58,172 --> 00:05:00,883 Hey. No one-termers. 91 00:05:00,967 --> 00:05:03,636 You too, huh? Hey, I know a good yogurt place. 92 00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:05,596 Get away from me, loser. 93 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,265 SMITHERS: Ladies and gentlemen, 94 00:05:07,348 --> 00:05:10,435 I give you "Montgomery Burns: The Life." 95 00:05:10,518 --> 00:05:12,353 (applause) 96 00:05:21,946 --> 00:05:23,406 Ah, Bobo. 97 00:05:23,489 --> 00:05:24,741 Hmm. 98 00:05:24,824 --> 00:05:26,576 (applause) 99 00:05:26,659 --> 00:05:29,120 Here are several fine young men who I'm sure are gonna go far. 100 00:05:29,203 --> 00:05:32,123 Ladies and gentlemen, The Ramones. 101 00:05:32,206 --> 00:05:35,877 Ah, these minstrels will soothe my jangled nerves. 102 00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:38,004 I'd just like to say this gig sucks. 103 00:05:38,087 --> 00:05:40,214 Hey, up yours, Springfield. 104 00:05:40,298 --> 00:05:41,257 One, two, three, four! 105 00:05:46,262 --> 00:05:47,972 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 106 00:05:48,056 --> 00:05:50,558 -♪ Happy birthday ♪ -♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 107 00:05:50,641 --> 00:05:53,603 -♪ Happy birthday ♪ -♪ Happy birthday, Burnsy ♪ 108 00:05:53,686 --> 00:05:56,731 ♪ Happy birthday to you ♪ 109 00:05:56,814 --> 00:05:58,816 Go to hell, you old bastard. 110 00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:01,110 Hey, I think they liked us. 111 00:06:01,194 --> 00:06:03,112 Have the Rolling Stones killed. 112 00:06:03,196 --> 00:06:05,239 -Sir, those aren't-- -Do as I say. 113 00:06:06,699 --> 00:06:09,702 (Burns scoffs) Stinks. Piffle. 114 00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:12,580 Dust Buster? Yeech. 115 00:06:12,663 --> 00:06:13,581 Hmm. 116 00:06:13,664 --> 00:06:15,249 Sir, I've arranged 117 00:06:15,333 --> 00:06:17,085 for the people of Australia to join hands tonight 118 00:06:17,168 --> 00:06:19,295 and spell out your name with candles. 119 00:06:19,379 --> 00:06:21,005 There's a satellite hookup on that monitor, 120 00:06:21,089 --> 00:06:22,590 if you'll just turn your head slightly. 121 00:06:22,673 --> 00:06:24,342 Bah, no time. Next! 122 00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:28,096 I have some sad news to report. 123 00:06:28,179 --> 00:06:30,390 A small puppy, not unlike Lassie, 124 00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:33,393 -was just run over in the parking lot. -(crowd gasps) 125 00:06:33,476 --> 00:06:35,770 And now it's time for the comedy stylings of Homer Simpson. 126 00:06:35,853 --> 00:06:38,106 ♪♪ 127 00:06:38,189 --> 00:06:40,775 Are you ready to laugh? 128 00:06:40,858 --> 00:06:42,527 Oh, that poor dog. 129 00:06:42,610 --> 00:06:47,156 I said, are you ready to laugh?! 130 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:49,450 Quiet, you awful man. 131 00:06:49,534 --> 00:06:53,246 -You know, Mr. Burns is so cheap-- -What? 132 00:06:53,329 --> 00:06:57,500 I-- I mean, you know, Mr. Burns is so old-- 133 00:06:57,583 --> 00:06:58,835 How dare you! 134 00:06:58,918 --> 00:07:00,711 Woo-hoo. Tough crowd. 135 00:07:00,795 --> 00:07:03,047 Better bring out the big guns. Ahem. 136 00:07:03,131 --> 00:07:05,133 Here's an impression of Mr. Burns 137 00:07:05,216 --> 00:07:09,095 that you might find a little cheeky. 138 00:07:09,178 --> 00:07:10,346 (crowd gasps) 139 00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:13,224 I'm Mr. Burns. Blah-blah-blah. 140 00:07:13,307 --> 00:07:16,769 Do this, do that. Blah-blah-blah. 141 00:07:16,853 --> 00:07:20,106 I think I'm so big. Blah-blah-blah. 142 00:07:20,189 --> 00:07:21,607 Destroy him. 143 00:07:21,691 --> 00:07:24,193 Blah-blah-blah. Look at me-- Ow! 144 00:07:24,277 --> 00:07:25,403 This party is over. 145 00:07:28,281 --> 00:07:31,742 (screaming, shouting) 146 00:07:31,826 --> 00:07:35,663 Ow. Where did I lose them? 147 00:07:35,746 --> 00:07:39,041 I'll never wiggle my bare butt in public again. 148 00:07:39,125 --> 00:07:40,793 I'd like to believe that this time. 149 00:07:40,877 --> 00:07:42,962 I really would. 150 00:07:43,045 --> 00:07:45,756 Bart, run down to the store and get a big bag of ice for your father. 151 00:07:45,840 --> 00:07:47,884 Yes'm. Dad, I know you're discouraged, 152 00:07:47,967 --> 00:07:50,553 but please, don't deny the world your fat can. 153 00:07:50,636 --> 00:07:52,346 Don't worry, boy. 154 00:07:52,430 --> 00:07:55,433 She'll be ready for your Aunt Selma's birthday. 155 00:07:55,516 --> 00:07:56,726 I knew it. 156 00:07:56,809 --> 00:07:58,269 (sighs) 157 00:07:58,352 --> 00:08:00,188 Look at all the wonderful things you have, Mr. Burns. 158 00:08:00,271 --> 00:08:03,316 King Arthur's Excalibur. The only existing nude photo of Mark Twain. 159 00:08:03,399 --> 00:08:04,859 And that rare first draft of the Constitution 160 00:08:04,942 --> 00:08:06,736 with the word "suckers" in it. 161 00:08:06,819 --> 00:08:10,031 -Yes, yes, yes. So what? -You want your bear, Bobo, don't you? 162 00:08:10,114 --> 00:08:14,577 Liar! I'll give you the thrashing of a lifetime! 163 00:08:16,412 --> 00:08:20,333 Resistance is futile. 164 00:08:20,416 --> 00:08:23,377 Oh, God, how I want my bear. 165 00:08:23,461 --> 00:08:25,713 But he's gone. Gone forever. 166 00:08:25,796 --> 00:08:28,299 I'd give anything to know what happened to him. 167 00:08:41,312 --> 00:08:44,357 Why, put some grease in your garter, Lindy. You're late! 168 00:08:47,401 --> 00:08:50,112 (crowd cheering) 169 00:08:52,406 --> 00:08:54,325 (distant explosions) 170 00:08:57,578 --> 00:09:00,289 This is all your fault. 171 00:09:11,217 --> 00:09:13,886 You've gotta start selling this for more than $1 a bag. 172 00:09:13,970 --> 00:09:16,097 We lost four more men on this expedition. 173 00:09:16,180 --> 00:09:19,433 If you can think of a better way to get ice, I'd like to hear it. 174 00:09:19,517 --> 00:09:20,893 -He's got us there. -Beats me. 175 00:09:23,521 --> 00:09:26,774 Hey, Apu, this bag of ice has a head in it. 176 00:09:26,857 --> 00:09:28,818 Ooh, a head bag. 177 00:09:28,901 --> 00:09:31,862 Those are chock-full of... 178 00:09:31,946 --> 00:09:33,239 head-y goodness. 179 00:09:34,615 --> 00:09:36,492 Hey, it's a teddy bear. 180 00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:38,494 (sniffs) Ew, gross. 181 00:09:38,578 --> 00:09:40,329 It's probably diseased or something. 182 00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:42,123 Here, Maggie. 183 00:09:44,750 --> 00:09:45,626 (♪♪ dramatic sting) 184 00:09:45,710 --> 00:09:46,669 (record scratch) 185 00:09:48,212 --> 00:09:49,797 (♪♪ dramatic sting) 186 00:09:55,970 --> 00:09:58,431 SMITHERS: Here's something that should cheer you up, sir. 187 00:09:58,514 --> 00:10:00,891 It's me, sir. Bobo. 188 00:10:00,975 --> 00:10:03,144 Hug me. Squeeze me. Tug at my fur. 189 00:10:03,227 --> 00:10:04,645 Ooh! Enough. 190 00:10:04,729 --> 00:10:08,357 Stop this grotesque charade. Now, find my teddy. 191 00:10:08,441 --> 00:10:11,319 Oh, and, uh, leave the costume. 192 00:10:17,366 --> 00:10:21,245 The Burns bear, perhaps the most valuable "wittle" bear in the world 193 00:10:21,329 --> 00:10:24,206 could be anywhere. It could be in your house. 194 00:10:24,290 --> 00:10:26,334 You could be looking at it right now. 195 00:10:26,417 --> 00:10:28,794 It could be right in front of your face as I'm saying this, 196 00:10:28,878 --> 00:10:32,423 waggling back and forth, perhaps being held up by a loved one. 197 00:10:32,506 --> 00:10:35,092 Maggie, I'm trying to watch TV. 198 00:10:35,176 --> 00:10:37,970 Put that moldy old bear down. 199 00:10:38,054 --> 00:10:40,473 Moldy? Old? 200 00:10:40,556 --> 00:10:43,142 I'm gonna get something to eat. 201 00:10:43,225 --> 00:10:46,062 Well, it's not your original bear, of course. Mm-hey! 202 00:10:46,145 --> 00:10:49,565 But it is programmed to be just as cuddly. 203 00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:50,816 Aw, doggone it. 204 00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:51,817 (growls) 205 00:10:51,901 --> 00:10:53,152 It's supposed to be... 206 00:10:53,235 --> 00:10:55,071 doing a little dance. 207 00:10:55,154 --> 00:10:57,406 -BURNS: Get the bear off. -SMITHERS: I got him. 208 00:10:57,490 --> 00:10:59,283 Trying to turn it off. 209 00:10:59,367 --> 00:11:03,037 No. Bear want to live. 210 00:11:03,120 --> 00:11:06,082 (bear growling) 211 00:11:06,165 --> 00:11:09,126 (soft music playing) 212 00:11:11,837 --> 00:11:13,839 (grunts) 213 00:11:16,676 --> 00:11:19,887 (screaming) 214 00:11:19,970 --> 00:11:24,308 Son of a--! D'oh! Stupid stair! 215 00:11:24,392 --> 00:11:25,309 (gasps) 216 00:11:26,894 --> 00:11:29,230 How long have we had these fish? 217 00:11:29,313 --> 00:11:34,110 Wait, the bear. Burns' bear. 218 00:11:34,193 --> 00:11:37,988 "Bobo." It's Mr. Burns' bear, all right. 219 00:11:38,072 --> 00:11:40,825 Well, Burns isn't getting this back cheap, I can tell you that. 220 00:11:40,908 --> 00:11:45,705 He's gonna have to give me my own recording studio. 221 00:11:45,788 --> 00:11:48,207 ♪ Two all-beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese ♪ 222 00:11:48,290 --> 00:11:50,584 ♪ Pickles, onions on a sesame seed bun ♪ 223 00:11:50,668 --> 00:11:53,003 Oh... 224 00:11:53,087 --> 00:11:55,339 MAN: Homer, you're drooling on the mike again. 225 00:11:55,423 --> 00:11:57,967 I think we should just give him the bear 226 00:11:58,050 --> 00:11:59,844 that he cherishes so much. 227 00:12:04,014 --> 00:12:06,642 Hmm. Better sew that eye back on. 228 00:12:06,726 --> 00:12:09,437 No, let's send Burns the eye in the mail. 229 00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:11,689 He'll pay more money if he thinks the bear's in danger. 230 00:12:11,772 --> 00:12:13,649 Yes, we'll send the eye. 231 00:12:13,733 --> 00:12:17,111 I'm sure he'll offer us a fair reward. 232 00:12:17,194 --> 00:12:18,821 And then we'll make him double it. 233 00:12:18,904 --> 00:12:20,698 ALL: Huh? 234 00:12:20,781 --> 00:12:22,950 Well, why can't I be greedy once in a while? 235 00:12:23,033 --> 00:12:27,371 Bobo. My beautiful Bobo. 236 00:12:27,455 --> 00:12:30,958 I promise I'll never leave you behind again. 237 00:12:31,041 --> 00:12:31,959 (clears throat) 238 00:12:32,042 --> 00:12:33,252 Oh, yes. 239 00:12:33,335 --> 00:12:35,421 Naturally, I can't pay you much of a reward 240 00:12:35,504 --> 00:12:37,214 because I'm strapped for cash. 241 00:12:37,298 --> 00:12:38,382 (creaking) 242 00:12:42,470 --> 00:12:45,723 As you can see, this old place is falling apart. 243 00:12:45,806 --> 00:12:47,975 But I'm sure we can come to an understanding. 244 00:12:48,058 --> 00:12:49,101 Yes, sir. 245 00:12:49,185 --> 00:12:51,854 (thinking) Reject the first offer. Reject the first offer. 246 00:12:51,937 --> 00:12:53,522 May I offer you a drink? 247 00:12:53,606 --> 00:12:56,692 Sorry, Burns. No deal. 248 00:12:58,152 --> 00:12:59,361 Don't worry, Smithers. 249 00:12:59,445 --> 00:13:01,030 He's playing hardball now, 250 00:13:01,113 --> 00:13:03,157 but it won't take him long to crack. 251 00:13:04,742 --> 00:13:06,327 (neck cracking) 252 00:13:06,410 --> 00:13:08,788 I gotta call Burns. I gotta call Burns! 253 00:13:08,871 --> 00:13:11,499 Maybe I can still get that drink. 254 00:13:11,582 --> 00:13:13,959 Dad, the longer he has to wait, the more he'll pay. 255 00:13:14,043 --> 00:13:16,754 Right. That makes sense. 256 00:13:16,837 --> 00:13:18,297 Yah! 257 00:13:18,380 --> 00:13:20,800 No! No! Let me go! 258 00:13:23,177 --> 00:13:26,013 I knew you'd come crawling back. 259 00:13:26,096 --> 00:13:27,848 -How much do you want? -$1 million 260 00:13:27,932 --> 00:13:31,018 and three Hawaiian islands. Good ones. Not the leper one. 261 00:13:31,101 --> 00:13:33,437 Done. Now give me that bear. 262 00:13:33,521 --> 00:13:36,065 Woo-hoo! I'm rich! Rich, I tells you! 263 00:13:36,148 --> 00:13:39,109 Here you go. (straining) 264 00:13:39,193 --> 00:13:42,446 It seems to be stuck. 265 00:13:42,530 --> 00:13:44,657 Bad baby. Bad Maggie. 266 00:13:47,618 --> 00:13:49,912 (whimpers) 267 00:13:51,121 --> 00:13:52,957 Give me the bear. 268 00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:55,459 The bear. The bear. 269 00:13:55,543 --> 00:13:56,377 (sighs) 270 00:14:01,715 --> 00:14:03,884 HOMER: Here you go, Maggie. 271 00:14:03,968 --> 00:14:05,886 The deal's off, Mr. Burns. 272 00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:07,972 The bear stays here. 273 00:14:08,055 --> 00:14:09,890 You've made a mistake, Simpson. 274 00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:11,392 (groans) 275 00:14:12,893 --> 00:14:13,894 Ah, big deal. 276 00:14:13,978 --> 00:14:15,312 Who needs his money? 277 00:14:15,396 --> 00:14:17,523 We're getting by okay. 278 00:14:17,606 --> 00:14:20,317 -(crash) -Son. You gotta help me. 279 00:14:20,401 --> 00:14:22,695 I hit three people on the way over here, 280 00:14:22,778 --> 00:14:25,322 and I don't have any insurance. 281 00:14:25,406 --> 00:14:27,032 So how's about you? 282 00:14:32,162 --> 00:14:33,664 Excellent shot, Smithers. 283 00:14:33,747 --> 00:14:36,083 I'll be squeezing my Bobo in no time. 284 00:14:36,166 --> 00:14:39,420 Howdy, gents. What can I diddily-do you for? 285 00:14:39,503 --> 00:14:40,713 (whimpers) 286 00:14:40,796 --> 00:14:42,423 (thumps) 287 00:14:42,506 --> 00:14:46,135 Remember Smithers, in and out in 18 seconds. 288 00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:50,681 (both grunt) 289 00:14:52,933 --> 00:14:55,561 -More cocoa, Mr. Burns? -Yes. 290 00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:13,245 Mmm. Sixty-four slices of American cheese. 291 00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:15,915 Sixty-four. 292 00:15:15,998 --> 00:15:19,126 Sixty-three. 293 00:15:19,209 --> 00:15:21,754 Two. 294 00:15:23,547 --> 00:15:27,134 One. 295 00:15:27,217 --> 00:15:30,387 Have you been up all night eating cheese? 296 00:15:30,471 --> 00:15:32,681 I think I'm blind. 297 00:15:32,765 --> 00:15:34,016 -(Burns grunts) -Wha? 298 00:15:34,099 --> 00:15:35,893 Good day to you. 299 00:15:35,976 --> 00:15:37,227 (moans) 300 00:15:37,311 --> 00:15:39,647 Excuse me, we wanted to see the geek 301 00:15:39,730 --> 00:15:41,982 who valued the happiness of his children more than money. 302 00:15:42,066 --> 00:15:43,484 Right here. 303 00:15:43,567 --> 00:15:46,612 Ah, you said his head was the size of a baseball. 304 00:15:46,695 --> 00:15:48,781 My life can't get any worse. 305 00:15:48,864 --> 00:15:50,366 SMITHERS (over intercom): Homer Simpson, report for much worse duties. 306 00:15:50,449 --> 00:15:51,367 D'oh! 307 00:15:51,450 --> 00:15:54,119 Ow! Ow! 308 00:15:54,203 --> 00:15:56,163 -After lunch, can I whip you? -MAN: Nope. 309 00:15:56,246 --> 00:15:57,414 Aw, no fair. 310 00:15:57,498 --> 00:15:59,166 -(whip cracks) -Ow! 311 00:15:59,249 --> 00:16:01,669 Hmm. I wonder what makes it turn. 312 00:16:01,752 --> 00:16:03,837 Who cares? 313 00:16:03,921 --> 00:16:06,966 Maggie, I know you like the bear, 314 00:16:07,049 --> 00:16:09,635 but wouldn't you be just as happy playing with... 315 00:16:09,718 --> 00:16:11,887 this box? See, Maggie? 316 00:16:11,971 --> 00:16:13,472 See the fun box? 317 00:16:13,555 --> 00:16:18,560 (humming and laughing) 318 00:16:18,644 --> 00:16:20,813 No! My box. My box! 319 00:16:20,896 --> 00:16:22,106 (giggles) 320 00:16:22,189 --> 00:16:25,067 Mmm. I think we need a new hair dryer. 321 00:16:25,150 --> 00:16:28,487 Marge, you must hate me for not taking Mr. Burns' money. 322 00:16:28,570 --> 00:16:31,657 I don't hate you. I'm proud of you. 323 00:16:31,740 --> 00:16:33,325 You came through for your daughter 324 00:16:33,409 --> 00:16:35,202 when she needed you the most. 325 00:16:35,285 --> 00:16:37,079 Aw, thanks, Marge. 326 00:16:37,162 --> 00:16:40,791 But it'll take a lot more than that to comfort this tortured soul. 327 00:16:40,874 --> 00:16:42,001 (giggles) 328 00:16:42,084 --> 00:16:43,752 HOMER: Hey, boxy. Heh heh heh. 329 00:16:43,836 --> 00:16:44,962 Give me that. 330 00:16:45,045 --> 00:16:46,005 Aw. 331 00:16:46,088 --> 00:16:48,048 ♪ 2 plus 2 is 4 ♪ 332 00:16:48,132 --> 00:16:51,677 ♪ 2 plus 2 is 4, ♪ 2 plus 2 is 4 ♪ 333 00:16:51,760 --> 00:16:53,429 (Homer laughs) 334 00:16:53,512 --> 00:16:56,473 I can see why this is so popular. Look at him. 335 00:16:56,557 --> 00:16:57,766 -(Homer laughs) -♪ 2 plus 2 is 4 ♪ 336 00:16:59,226 --> 00:17:02,730 -Give me my bear, Simpson. -Ah! 337 00:17:02,813 --> 00:17:07,860 It's The Soul Mass Transit System. 338 00:17:07,943 --> 00:17:10,738 (panting) Give it to me. 339 00:17:10,821 --> 00:17:13,949 El yo-yo es grandé. 340 00:17:14,033 --> 00:17:15,242 Ai, chihuahua. 341 00:17:15,325 --> 00:17:16,994 As you can see, Simpson, 342 00:17:17,077 --> 00:17:19,038 I have taken over all 78 channels. 343 00:17:19,121 --> 00:17:21,415 And you won't see any of your favorite shows again 344 00:17:21,498 --> 00:17:22,708 until you give in. 345 00:17:22,791 --> 00:17:25,419 -Whoa, that bites. -Holy crap. 346 00:17:25,502 --> 00:17:27,212 -(gasps) -BURNS: What's that you say? 347 00:17:27,296 --> 00:17:29,214 You can live without television 348 00:17:29,298 --> 00:17:32,384 -as long as you have beer? -That's right. 349 00:17:32,468 --> 00:17:34,762 Wrong. All beer trucks 350 00:17:34,845 --> 00:17:36,847 heading towards Springfield have been diverted. 351 00:17:36,930 --> 00:17:39,308 This town will be as dry as a bone. 352 00:17:39,391 --> 00:17:42,394 And if the rest of you beer-swilling tube jockeys out there 353 00:17:42,478 --> 00:17:46,774 have a problem with this, talk to Homer Simpson. 354 00:17:46,857 --> 00:17:50,486 (laughs) 355 00:17:50,569 --> 00:17:52,154 (doorbell rings) 356 00:17:52,237 --> 00:17:55,866 Homer, give him what he wants. 357 00:17:55,949 --> 00:17:57,701 Oh, Barney, leave me alone. 358 00:17:57,785 --> 00:17:59,161 -Whoops! -(gunshot) 359 00:17:59,244 --> 00:18:00,454 -(glass shatters) -(woman screams) 360 00:18:00,537 --> 00:18:02,664 (siren wailing) 361 00:18:02,748 --> 00:18:03,957 BARNEY: Oh-oh. 362 00:18:04,041 --> 00:18:05,834 My old man can't get a beer 363 00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:07,669 because his old man won't give a bear 364 00:18:07,753 --> 00:18:10,297 to another old man. Let's get him! 365 00:18:10,380 --> 00:18:12,591 Wait. Why are we getting him? 366 00:18:12,674 --> 00:18:16,220 Look, fellas. The first snapdragon of the season. 367 00:18:16,303 --> 00:18:19,973 -Never mind. Let's just get him. -Yeah! 368 00:18:20,057 --> 00:18:21,225 ♪♪ 369 00:18:21,308 --> 00:18:23,185 Smithers, I'm home. 370 00:18:23,268 --> 00:18:25,270 (laugh track plays) 371 00:18:25,354 --> 00:18:27,064 What? Already? 372 00:18:27,147 --> 00:18:28,398 (laugh track plays) 373 00:18:28,482 --> 00:18:29,525 Yes. 374 00:18:29,608 --> 00:18:31,568 (laugh track plays) 375 00:18:31,652 --> 00:18:34,404 Is it my imagination, or is TV getting worse? 376 00:18:34,488 --> 00:18:37,574 It's about the same. Uh-oh! Look out, Smithers! 377 00:18:37,658 --> 00:18:39,868 -(glass shatters) -(laugh track plays) 378 00:18:39,952 --> 00:18:41,370 I love this show. 379 00:18:41,453 --> 00:18:42,412 (crowd shouting) 380 00:18:44,706 --> 00:18:48,794 Well, well, look who's come to apologize. 381 00:18:48,877 --> 00:18:51,421 Come on, let's go in there and get the bear. 382 00:18:51,505 --> 00:18:52,923 ALL: Yeah! 383 00:18:58,428 --> 00:19:00,055 Ha! I got it. 384 00:19:00,139 --> 00:19:03,183 (crowd cheers) 385 00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:06,770 Aw, jeez, will you look at that? 386 00:19:06,854 --> 00:19:08,230 (whimpers) 387 00:19:08,313 --> 00:19:10,649 -WOMAN 1: Hmm? -WOMAN 2: Hmm? 388 00:19:10,732 --> 00:19:13,735 (whimpers) 389 00:19:13,819 --> 00:19:15,195 What have we become? 390 00:19:15,279 --> 00:19:18,448 We've given the word "mob" a bad name. 391 00:19:18,532 --> 00:19:21,076 (indistinct crowd chatter) 392 00:19:27,875 --> 00:19:29,293 Well, what should we do now? 393 00:19:29,376 --> 00:19:32,379 Hey, everybody, let's go sing at the hospital. 394 00:19:32,462 --> 00:19:34,173 ♪ For we've got... ♪ 395 00:19:34,256 --> 00:19:35,924 ♪ High hopes ♪ 396 00:19:36,008 --> 00:19:39,094 ♪ We've got high hopes ♪ 397 00:19:39,178 --> 00:19:41,221 (doorbell rings) 398 00:19:41,305 --> 00:19:44,474 Simpson, look what you've reduced me to. 399 00:19:44,558 --> 00:19:46,643 Please. Please. 400 00:19:46,727 --> 00:19:49,688 But, Mr. Burns, it's not my bear. 401 00:19:49,771 --> 00:19:51,398 It's Maggie's. 402 00:19:51,481 --> 00:19:52,482 Ah.... 403 00:19:59,448 --> 00:20:02,659 So, good sand today, hmm? 404 00:20:03,869 --> 00:20:06,413 Oh, well, I don't usually.... 405 00:20:06,496 --> 00:20:08,207 Well, just this once. 406 00:20:08,290 --> 00:20:09,291 Ew. 407 00:20:09,374 --> 00:20:12,836 Damn you, paparazzo. 408 00:20:12,920 --> 00:20:15,964 Well, Maggie, I've given this a lot of thought. 409 00:20:16,048 --> 00:20:19,468 I'm sure we can come to some sort of agreement. 410 00:20:19,551 --> 00:20:22,095 (straining) 411 00:20:25,849 --> 00:20:30,062 Beaten by an infant. What could be more humiliating? 412 00:20:30,145 --> 00:20:31,855 What a scoop. 413 00:20:31,939 --> 00:20:33,982 Okay, Maggie. You win. 414 00:20:34,066 --> 00:20:35,692 But I want you to do something for me. 415 00:20:35,776 --> 00:20:37,694 Hang on to that bear. 416 00:20:37,778 --> 00:20:40,864 Don't make the same mistake I made. 417 00:20:40,948 --> 00:20:41,990 (sighs) 418 00:20:45,953 --> 00:20:49,539 (Maggie sucking on pacifier) 419 00:20:49,623 --> 00:20:52,584 For me? Bobo? 420 00:20:52,668 --> 00:20:53,627 (gasps) 421 00:20:53,710 --> 00:20:56,129 Smithers, I'm so happy. 422 00:20:56,213 --> 00:20:58,632 Something amazing has happened. I'm actually happy. 423 00:20:58,715 --> 00:21:03,095 Take a note: From now on, I'm only going to be good and kind to everyone. 424 00:21:03,178 --> 00:21:05,097 I'm sorry, sir, I don't have a pencil. 425 00:21:05,180 --> 00:21:06,974 Don't worry. I'm sure I'll remember it. 426 00:21:09,768 --> 00:21:11,937 Well, we didn't get any money, 427 00:21:12,020 --> 00:21:14,273 but Mr. Burns got what he wanted. 428 00:21:14,356 --> 00:21:16,149 Marge, I'm confused. 429 00:21:16,233 --> 00:21:18,151 Is this a happy ending or a sad ending? 430 00:21:18,235 --> 00:21:20,279 It's an ending. That's enough. 431 00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:24,908 There you go. 432 00:21:24,992 --> 00:21:27,119 Ah, Bobo, reunited at last. 433 00:21:27,202 --> 00:21:30,831 But I can't help but wonder what the future holds for you. 434 00:21:30,914 --> 00:21:34,167 (yawning) Ah, yes, wonder.... 435 00:21:40,757 --> 00:21:42,467 HOMER LOOK-A-LIKES: D'oh! D'oh! 436 00:21:44,386 --> 00:21:45,721 (sighs) 437 00:21:45,804 --> 00:21:47,806 Bobo, I know I say this every century, 438 00:21:47,889 --> 00:21:50,392 but I'll never leave you behind again. 439 00:21:53,562 --> 00:21:55,480 Wait for me, sir. 440 00:21:55,564 --> 00:21:56,523 Woof! 441 00:22:04,656 --> 00:22:07,409 ♪♪ 442 00:22:50,243 --> 00:22:51,745 Shh! 443 00:22:54,456 --> 00:22:57,084 SUBTITLES ENHANCED BY ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.