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♪ The Simpsons ♪
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(bell ringing)
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(whistle blowing)
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(beeping)
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(jazzy solo)
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(tires screech)
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D'oh!
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-Aah!
-(tires screech)
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The beauty of it is each parking space
is a mere one foot narrower--
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Indistinguishable
to the naked eye,
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but therein lies the game.
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-I fear to watch, yet I cannot turn away.
-(cars approaching)
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Blast it, woman. You parked
too close. Move your car!
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I'm in the lines. You got
a problem, go tell your mama.
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Oh, don't worry.
She'll hear about this.
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-(horns honking)
-MAN: I can't get out!
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-WOMAN: I'm trapped.
-MAN: I can't breathe!
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-(honking continues)
-(Bart laughing sinisterly)
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Class, I know there's no way
to prove who actually did this,
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and in our American democracy,
everyone is innocent until proven guilty.
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-God bless America.
-But my classroom is not a democracy. Ha!
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For the rest of the year,
Bart Simpson will be
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the first student called on
for every question.
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-(gulps)
-Well, let's get started.
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Can someone
pronounce this word?
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Hmm? Bart?
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Uh-- Um-- Hmm?
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-Uh--
-(grunting)
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Mmm-- Uh--
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-Oh, pick me, teacher! I'm ever so smart.
-Uh--
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It's "photosynthesis"!
Damn your feeble brain!
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Oh, I couldn't read it.
The letters are all blurry.
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Is it possible all your misbehavior
and miserable grades
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have been caused by
a simple vision disorder?
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(British accent) You mean it
ain't me noggin', it's me peepers?
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Oh, well,
that's just "loverly."
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Watch this, guys.
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Ooh!
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-Uh-oh. He's done for.
-Don't worry.
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The safety glass'll
protect us.
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-(all gasp)
-(alarm blaring)
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Run! We'll hide at my house!
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(all shouting)
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Hey, this emergency exit
is painted on!
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There's no way out! There's no way out!
We're doomed! Doomed!
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(all groaning)
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Well, sir, I won't bore you with
the details of our miraculous escape,
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but we desperately need
a real emergency exit.
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Why, that's a fabulous idea.
Anything else you'd like?
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How about real lead in the radiation
shields? Urinal cakes, maybe?
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Smithers, throw this at him.
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(grunts)
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(shouting)
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Smithers, where does
that tube go?
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I'm not sure, sir.
It was here when we moved in.
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♪♪ (exotic)
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(shouting continues)
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MEN:
Dance! Dance! Dance! Dance!
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(men ululating)
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Sir, we'll need a new
dangerous emissions supervisor.
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Yes, we'll find
someone cheap.
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It's been a very
lean year for us.
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BOTH:
Money fight!
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(both laughing)
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Mmm.
(mumbles)
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Excellent, Zutroy. Work hard
and each day you'll get a shiny penny.
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(men shouting)
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Agent Wesson,
Department of Labor.
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-This man's an illegal alien.
-(chuckles)
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That's preposterous. Zutroy here
is as American as apple pie.
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(foreign language)
Mr. Burns.
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This plant violates
every labor law in the book.
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We found a missing Brazilian soccer team
working in your reactor core.
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That plane crashed
on my property!
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Look, Mr. Burns,
we want to see some changes.
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For starters, you can reverse
your sexist employment policies
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and hire at least one woman.
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All right.
I'll bring in a woman.
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-But I still stand by my hiring policies.
-(quacking)
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-Get back to work, Stewart!
-(quacking)
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Now with my new H.M.O.,
I can provide every medical service...
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you'll ever need
under one roof.
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You do have insurance,
don't you?
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-Yes.
-Well, that's wonderful.
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(chuckling)
Let's go visit the optometrist.
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Your son has a temporary
condition called "Lazy eye,"
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Where one eye
is weaker than the other.
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-You'll have to wear these for two weeks.
-(groans)
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Menachem Begin wore a pair
just like them.
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Hmm. That scalp's a little dry.
Better see our dermatologist.
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Rub a palm full of this medicated salve
into your scalp every half an hour.
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Keep him away from open flames
and pregnant women.
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Ah, these should help
those fallen arches. Enjoy.
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Hmm. Throat looks a little red.
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-I'd better spray it.
-(coughing)
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(as Jerry Lewis)
Oh, thanks, nice lady.
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My voice is crazy
with this spraying already.
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Oy, I feel so much better,
Mr. Medical Science-Type Person.
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If they hire a woman,
we won't be able to spit on the floor.
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And we can't take off our pants
when it gets real hot.
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And we won't be able to pee
in the drinking fountain.
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Yeah-- I mean, not--
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You know, if we wanted to.
Not that I ever did.
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Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet your
new coworker, Mindy Simmons.
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I think she has a degree
in engineering or something.
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-Hi. How's it going?
-Pleased to meet you.
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-Yeah, ditto.
-Hi. Ooh.
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(gasps)
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Homer, what's the matter?
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Ain't you never seen a naked chick
ridin' a clam before?
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Gotta go! Ahhh!
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What the hell was that?
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I probably shouldn't have eaten
that packet of powdered gravy
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I found in the parking lot.
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BOTH: Nice glasses, four eyes.
(laugh)
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Yeah, nice shoes, uh,
two feet. Yeah.
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-Your appearance is comical to me.
-(kids laughing)
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(gasps)
I'm a nerd!
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(gasps)
So am I!
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Yeah. Another day,
another box of stolen pens.
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-MINDY: Have a good night, Homer.
-You too.
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No goose bumps,
no hallucinations.
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That last time
was just a fluke.
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-♪♪ (whistling)
-(tires screeching, horns honking)
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(people shouting)
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(Homer shouting)
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Homer loves Mindy!
Homer loves Mindy!
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Hey, Homer, you're
hallucinating again.
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Not a good sign.
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So, uh, what do you guys
think of Mindy?
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Seems okay.
Anybody see the game last night?
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Yeah. That Mindy
seems real nice.
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Homer, what's with you?
You're talking during a coffee break.
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Yeah. Usually you just take the box
of doughnuts into the bathroom.
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Mindy has a motorcycle.
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Look, everybody. I'm the same person
I always was. Whoa!
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-(shouting)
-(kids screaming)
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-(grunting)
-(kids laughing)
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-Hey, he's learning on his own!
-Get him!
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(all grunting)
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-Moe, I need your advice.
-Yeah?
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See, I got this friend named
Joey Jo-Jo Junior Shabadoo.
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-That's the worst name I ever heard.
-(sobbing)
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-Bye, Joey Jo-Jo!
-Oh, what the hell? It's me.
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I'm attracted to another woman.
What am I going to do?
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00:08:18,831 --> 00:08:22,210
Your infatuation is based
on a physical attraction.
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Talk to the woman, and you'll realize
you have nothing in common.
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Barney, that is so insightful.
How did you come up with that?
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It was on one of
these bar napkins.
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(whimpers)
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Uh-- So, let's have
a conversation.
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Uh, I think we'll find we
have very little in common.
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-Can't talk. Eating.
-Hey, my favorite--
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Raspberry swirl
with a double glaze!
155
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Double glaze.
(gurgling)
156
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Oh! Okay, so we have
one thing in common.
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00:09:02,625 --> 00:09:07,171
But you know what I hate?
Drinking beer and watching TV.
158
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Not me.
That's my idea of heaven.
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-D'oh! Me too!
-Really?
160
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I can see I'm gonna love
working with you.
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Well, gotta go.
162
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(whispering) I wanna sneak in
a quick nap before lunch.
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(gasps)
Foul temptress.
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00:09:22,395 --> 00:09:25,022
I'll bet she thinks Ziggy's
gotten too preachy too.
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-(bell dings)
-(sighs)
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I made it the whole day
without seeing her again.
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(screams)
I mean, hello!
168
00:09:36,576 --> 00:09:38,369
(chuckles)
169
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I guess we'll be
going down together.
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-I mean, getting off toge-- I mean--
-That's okay.
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I'll just push the button
for the stimulator--
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I mean, elevator.
173
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(thinking)
Think unsexy thoughts.
174
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Think unsexy thoughts.
Think unsexy thoughts.
175
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Oh, that's unsexy.
176
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-(humming theme from "I Dream of Jeannie")
-Ew!
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(burps)
178
00:10:02,268 --> 00:10:03,853
D'oh!
179
00:10:03,936 --> 00:10:05,980
(whispering) Think unsexy thoughts.
Think unsexy thoughts.
180
00:10:07,315 --> 00:10:09,233
(chuckles)
181
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Well, this is my floor.
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(grunting, screaming)
183
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See you tomorrow!
184
00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:18,868
Ah, home to my loving family.
185
00:10:18,951 --> 00:10:21,037
What more could a man ask for?
186
00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:23,372
(blows nose)
187
00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:26,667
Hi, Homer. Don't kiss me.
I'm all stuffed up.
188
00:10:26,751 --> 00:10:28,794
-(groans)
-Hi, Dad.
189
00:10:28,878 --> 00:10:31,422
Hi, son!
How are you-- Ew!
190
00:10:31,505 --> 00:10:33,758
Dad, look.
I made fish sticks.
191
00:10:33,841 --> 00:10:35,384
They're burned on the outside,
but they're frozen on the inside,
192
00:10:35,468 --> 00:10:37,303
so it balances out.
193
00:10:37,386 --> 00:10:39,055
Yeah, good.
194
00:10:39,138 --> 00:10:42,016
That raccoon
stole my lamb chop!
195
00:10:43,434 --> 00:10:45,478
(TV: indistinct)
196
00:10:45,561 --> 00:10:48,272
Let's have a little quality time together,
just you and me.
197
00:10:48,356 --> 00:10:51,233
-(TV off)
-Oh, that's sweet. (sniffling)
198
00:10:51,317 --> 00:10:53,903
Guess what. There's
a new place at the mall
199
00:10:53,986 --> 00:10:55,905
that puts your picture
on a t-shirt.
200
00:10:55,988 --> 00:10:58,824
I got two dollars off
because mine got smeared.
201
00:10:58,908 --> 00:11:02,453
Ew. Hey, we haven't
watched TV in a while.
202
00:11:02,536 --> 00:11:05,164
Tonight, Eye on Springfield
takes a look...
203
00:11:05,247 --> 00:11:07,416
at the secret affairs of Kennedy,
Eisenhower, Bush and Clinton.
204
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:09,794
Did fooling around
on their wives make them great?
205
00:11:09,877 --> 00:11:12,755
We'll find out next when we play
"Hail to the Cheat."
206
00:11:12,838 --> 00:11:14,548
(whimpers)
207
00:11:14,632 --> 00:11:17,426
MAN: The Burmese melon fly
has over 1,000 sex partners...
208
00:11:17,510 --> 00:11:19,637
and suffers virtually no guilt.
209
00:11:19,720 --> 00:11:21,514
-(whimpers)
-(breathing heavily)
210
00:11:21,597 --> 00:11:24,016
WOMAN:
Ooh! Just do it.
211
00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:26,560
-(screams)
-(door closes)
212
00:11:26,644 --> 00:11:29,397
Examine your scalp
for ringworm.
213
00:11:35,403 --> 00:11:39,156
Hello, hotline?
I'm very tempted by another woman.
214
00:11:39,240 --> 00:11:42,243
Homer Simpson,
that's a dilly of a pickle.
215
00:11:42,326 --> 00:11:43,828
Hey, let's conference you
with Marge, huh?
216
00:11:43,911 --> 00:11:45,496
No!
217
00:11:45,579 --> 00:11:47,915
(groans, grunts)
218
00:11:52,253 --> 00:11:55,339
-Who are you?
-Homer, I'm your guardian angel.
219
00:11:55,423 --> 00:11:59,343
I've assumed the form of someone you would
recognize and revere, Sir Isaac Newton.
220
00:11:59,427 --> 00:12:02,096
-Sir Isa-who?
-Oh, very well.
221
00:12:02,179 --> 00:12:03,723
(gasps)
222
00:12:03,806 --> 00:12:06,642
Colonel Klink!
Did you ever get my letters?
223
00:12:06,726 --> 00:12:08,477
I'm not actually Colonel Klink.
224
00:12:08,561 --> 00:12:11,480
-I'm just assuming his form.
-(chuckles)
225
00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:14,442
Did you know Hogan had tunnels
all over your camp?
226
00:12:14,525 --> 00:12:17,361
Homer! That's not
why I'm here.
227
00:12:17,445 --> 00:12:19,530
My job is to show you
how miserable life would be
228
00:12:20,406 --> 00:12:23,075
if you married Mindy
instead of Marge.
229
00:12:24,535 --> 00:12:26,746
Ooh, I would live
in a big mansion?
230
00:12:28,247 --> 00:12:30,374
(both grunting)
231
00:12:30,458 --> 00:12:33,753
-I'm so happy, darling.
-I as well.
232
00:12:33,836 --> 00:12:37,381
-Are you happy, Jeeves?
-Yes, sir. Quite.
233
00:12:37,465 --> 00:12:40,718
-Then we're all happy.
-Let's get out of here.
234
00:12:40,801 --> 00:12:44,263
Sure, life is good for you,
but what about Marge?
235
00:12:45,848 --> 00:12:48,434
(gasps)
Marge lives here?
236
00:12:48,517 --> 00:12:50,102
MAN: Madam President,
your approval rating is soaring.
237
00:12:50,853 --> 00:12:51,812
MARGE: Mmm.
238
00:12:51,896 --> 00:12:54,398
This dream is over.
239
00:12:54,482 --> 00:12:56,692
(screaming)
240
00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:58,819
(grunting)
241
00:12:58,903 --> 00:13:00,946
Hey, you,
get out of my office!
242
00:13:01,030 --> 00:13:03,073
-Nerd!
-(kids taunting)
243
00:13:06,535 --> 00:13:08,454
You're goofy-looking.
(laughing)
244
00:13:08,537 --> 00:13:10,831
(all grunting)
245
00:13:10,915 --> 00:13:15,211
(panting)
Whoa!
246
00:13:17,671 --> 00:13:19,381
-What the hell?
-Shh!
247
00:13:24,804 --> 00:13:27,973
(murmuring)
248
00:13:28,057 --> 00:13:31,227
-What is this place?
-The refuge of the damned.
249
00:13:31,310 --> 00:13:33,395
A place where we can work
on our extra-credit assignments
250
00:13:34,021 --> 00:13:36,315
without fear of reprisal.
251
00:13:36,398 --> 00:13:38,943
Come, you must be tired
from the chase.
252
00:13:39,026 --> 00:13:42,863
Oliver, bring our friend a hard-boiled egg
and some prune juice.
253
00:13:42,947 --> 00:13:45,032
Finally, Bart's one of us.
254
00:13:45,115 --> 00:13:47,284
(kids)
Excelsior!
255
00:13:47,368 --> 00:13:53,082
♪ Oh, Mindy, you came
and you gave without flaking ♪
256
00:13:53,165 --> 00:13:55,292
♪ But I sent you BENGAY ♪
257
00:13:55,376 --> 00:13:57,837
♪ Oh, Andy, you kissed me ♪
258
00:13:57,920 --> 00:14:00,589
♪ And stopped me
from something ♪
259
00:14:00,673 --> 00:14:02,800
♪ And I ♪
Uh-oh.
260
00:14:02,883 --> 00:14:04,218
Dad, why are you singing?
261
00:14:04,301 --> 00:14:05,886
(thinking)
Tell a lie. Tell a lie.
262
00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:09,056
Because I have a small role
in a Broadway musical.
263
00:14:09,139 --> 00:14:11,058
It's not much,
but it's a start.
264
00:14:11,141 --> 00:14:14,395
-(thinking) Bravo.
-(lone clapping)
265
00:14:14,478 --> 00:14:16,981
-Are you hiding something from me?
-Like what?
266
00:14:17,064 --> 00:14:18,983
Judging from your song,
you're infatuated
267
00:14:19,066 --> 00:14:21,861
with a woman named Mindy
or a man named Andy.
268
00:14:21,944 --> 00:14:24,738
-Lisa, look out behind you!
-Dad, I'm not gonna fall for that.
269
00:14:24,822 --> 00:14:27,992
No, Lisa, I swear to you!
I'm 100% completely serious!
270
00:14:28,075 --> 00:14:30,619
You've gotta turn around
right now before it's too late!
271
00:14:30,703 --> 00:14:31,662
-Huh?
-Sucker!
272
00:14:33,789 --> 00:14:36,876
"Mindy, because of our
uncontrollable attraction,
273
00:14:36,959 --> 00:14:40,713
I think we should avoid
each other from now on."
274
00:14:40,796 --> 00:14:44,842
"Max, what I did,
I did because of alcohol and anger."
275
00:14:44,925 --> 00:14:47,636
"I'm tired of these jokes
about my giant hand.
276
00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:50,723
The first such incident
occurred in 1956 when"--
277
00:14:50,806 --> 00:14:53,684
-Hi, Homer.
-Mindy! Uh-- (clears throat)
278
00:14:53,767 --> 00:14:56,562
Oh, no, I'm sweating
like Roger Ebert.
279
00:14:56,645 --> 00:15:00,733
Mu-- Murphy, youse--
You are a elf--
280
00:15:00,816 --> 00:15:04,403
Uncontrollably, I think--
281
00:15:04,486 --> 00:15:07,489
(gibberish)
282
00:15:07,573 --> 00:15:10,284
Look at those two
inseparable chums, Smithers.
283
00:15:10,367 --> 00:15:13,871
That's exactly the teamwork we'd like to
showcase at this year's energy convention.
284
00:15:13,954 --> 00:15:16,916
-Are you sure, sir?
-Well, no one else seems to share
285
00:15:16,999 --> 00:15:18,751
the same spirit of camaraderie.
286
00:15:18,834 --> 00:15:20,544
(gibberish continues)
287
00:15:20,628 --> 00:15:23,839
(screaming)
288
00:15:23,923 --> 00:15:26,216
Simpson, Simmons,
you two have been chosen
289
00:15:26,300 --> 00:15:29,053
to represent us at
the National Energy Convention.
290
00:15:29,136 --> 00:15:31,805
Congratulations. You'll be spending two
nights together in glamorous Capital City.
291
00:15:31,889 --> 00:15:35,017
Wow! Capital City!
292
00:15:35,100 --> 00:15:36,852
The Windy Apple!
293
00:15:36,936 --> 00:15:38,854
Come on.
I'll get you the tickets.
294
00:15:38,938 --> 00:15:42,191
Oh, this is the worst crisis
my marriage has ever faced!
295
00:15:42,274 --> 00:15:46,362
Colonel Klink,
why have you forsaken me?
296
00:15:46,445 --> 00:15:49,031
-What is it? You have a question?
-(chuckling)
297
00:15:49,114 --> 00:15:51,784
Did you know Kinch had
a radio in the coffee pot?
298
00:15:51,867 --> 00:15:53,702
He did? Mmm!
299
00:15:54,912 --> 00:15:55,871
(groans)
300
00:16:05,422 --> 00:16:07,508
TV's there, bathroom's there,
301
00:16:07,591 --> 00:16:10,219
and there's your king-sized bed
for--
302
00:16:10,302 --> 00:16:12,096
(wolf whistle, meowing)
303
00:16:12,179 --> 00:16:15,265
(imitates bed squeaking,
growls, pants)
304
00:16:15,349 --> 00:16:16,684
(barking, howling)
305
00:16:16,767 --> 00:16:18,185
(gibberish)
Hubba-hubba.
306
00:16:18,268 --> 00:16:20,813
Stop that!
I love my wife and family.
307
00:16:20,896 --> 00:16:22,106
All I'm gonna use this bed for
is sleeping, eating,
308
00:16:22,189 --> 00:16:23,899
and maybe building a little fort.
309
00:16:23,983 --> 00:16:25,359
That's it!
310
00:16:25,442 --> 00:16:29,405
(gasps)
Free mouthwash! Free shampoo!
311
00:16:29,488 --> 00:16:33,242
-Free shower curtain!
-MINDY: Free shower curtain!
312
00:16:33,325 --> 00:16:36,078
-Mindy?
-Homer?
313
00:16:36,161 --> 00:16:40,833
Wow. If it weren't for this wall,
we'd be sleeping in the same bed.
314
00:16:40,916 --> 00:16:44,586
Yeah. Uh, walls are a necessity
in today's society. (chuckles)
315
00:16:44,670 --> 00:16:49,883
Homer, I got a really wicked idea
that could get us into a lot of trouble.
316
00:16:49,967 --> 00:16:53,846
Oh! Mindy, we have to fight
our temptation.
317
00:16:53,929 --> 00:16:56,932
No, Homer. Let's do it.
318
00:16:57,016 --> 00:16:58,517
Let's call room service!
319
00:16:58,600 --> 00:17:01,311
-Oh.
-(beeping)
320
00:17:01,395 --> 00:17:03,439
Someone is charging room service
to the company, sir.
321
00:17:03,522 --> 00:17:06,233
Well, we'll just see about that.
322
00:17:07,735 --> 00:17:10,696
Fly, my pretties. Fly!
323
00:17:10,779 --> 00:17:12,906
(chittering)
324
00:17:12,990 --> 00:17:15,367
(screaming)
325
00:17:15,451 --> 00:17:17,161
-(thudding)
-(groans)
326
00:17:17,244 --> 00:17:18,996
Continue the research.
327
00:17:19,079 --> 00:17:22,041
-(lips smacking)
-Mmm!
328
00:17:22,124 --> 00:17:25,794
-I can't believe we ordered so much.
-Oh, something's missing.
329
00:17:25,878 --> 00:17:29,465
Ooh! One of the turkeys
fell behind the bed.
330
00:17:29,548 --> 00:17:34,470
(both)
Mmm. Foot-long chili dog.
331
00:17:38,599 --> 00:17:39,558
(both gasp)
332
00:17:42,061 --> 00:17:44,855
(Marge's voice:
Mechanical humming sound)
333
00:17:44,938 --> 00:17:47,357
(screams)
It's a sign!
334
00:17:47,441 --> 00:17:50,736
-(shouts)
-(mechanical hum continues)
335
00:17:53,489 --> 00:17:55,532
Good news, honey.
Two weeks are up.
336
00:17:55,616 --> 00:17:57,993
You don't have to wear
your glasses anymore.
337
00:17:58,077 --> 00:18:00,329
And your scalp
and posture seem fine.
338
00:18:00,412 --> 00:18:03,499
Yes!
(grunts)
339
00:18:03,582 --> 00:18:06,376
Kids, did anyone pray
for giant shoes?
340
00:18:06,460 --> 00:18:08,420
-I did!
-Okilly-dokilly.
341
00:18:08,504 --> 00:18:11,548
We've been doing a lot
of upper-body work on Bart.
342
00:18:11,632 --> 00:18:13,967
-Today, let's pound his kidneys.
-Yeah.
343
00:18:14,051 --> 00:18:16,470
-♪♪ (humming)
-Let's get-- Huh?
344
00:18:18,639 --> 00:18:21,350
What gives?
345
00:18:21,433 --> 00:18:24,144
Gentlemen, the nerd
you knew is dead.
346
00:18:24,228 --> 00:18:27,523
Beat me, and you will be
beating one of your own.
347
00:18:27,606 --> 00:18:30,359
-Whatever.
-(blows landing)
348
00:18:30,442 --> 00:18:32,569
(electricity buzzing)
349
00:18:32,653 --> 00:18:35,656
(chattering)
350
00:18:40,327 --> 00:18:42,579
-So this stuff really works?
-Certainly does.
351
00:18:42,663 --> 00:18:44,623
-Oh, well, lots of luck!
-Oh!
352
00:18:44,706 --> 00:18:46,500
(snaps fingers)
353
00:18:46,583 --> 00:18:49,378
(men muttering)
354
00:18:49,461 --> 00:18:51,421
(rustling)
355
00:18:56,301 --> 00:18:59,179
Thanks for poisoning
the planet, bastard!
356
00:18:59,263 --> 00:19:01,181
-Get bent!
-No more Chernobyls!
357
00:19:01,265 --> 00:19:02,266
Go to hell!
358
00:19:02,349 --> 00:19:04,309
-(grunts)
-(man shouts)
359
00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:07,521
You know, I was a little worried about
coming to this convention with you.
360
00:19:07,604 --> 00:19:09,982
But I think as long as
we're not alone together--
361
00:19:10,065 --> 00:19:11,984
MAN (on TV): And now the moment
you've been waiting for.
362
00:19:12,067 --> 00:19:14,862
This year's king and queen
of energy are...
363
00:19:14,945 --> 00:19:18,073
Homer Simpson
and Mindy Simmons.
364
00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:20,742
-Huh?
-♪♪ (fanfare)
365
00:19:20,826 --> 00:19:24,621
Homer, Mindy, you've just won a romantic
dinner alone at Madame Chao's,
366
00:19:24,705 --> 00:19:27,291
the sexiest Chinese restaurant
in Capital City!
367
00:19:27,374 --> 00:19:29,793
-Is there any way to get out of this?
-No.
368
00:19:38,677 --> 00:19:40,429
(sighs)
369
00:19:40,512 --> 00:19:42,306
What a perfect evening.
370
00:19:42,389 --> 00:19:44,933
It was sure nice of them
to make us cheeseburgers.
371
00:19:45,017 --> 00:19:46,185
Uh, yeah.
372
00:19:49,146 --> 00:19:51,440
(reading silently) "You will
find happiness with a new love."
373
00:19:51,523 --> 00:19:55,152
Oh, even the Chinese are against me.
(groans)
374
00:19:55,235 --> 00:19:57,571
What's the point?
I can't fight fate.
375
00:19:57,654 --> 00:19:59,698
(slurping)
376
00:19:59,781 --> 00:20:03,493
Hey, we're out of
these "new love" cookies.
377
00:20:03,577 --> 00:20:06,121
Well, open up the
"Stick with your wife" barrel.
378
00:20:08,415 --> 00:20:11,877
Well, I guess
you'll wanna come in.
379
00:20:11,960 --> 00:20:13,879
-Okay.
-"Okay."
380
00:20:13,962 --> 00:20:16,465
This was a really
nice night, Homer.
381
00:20:16,548 --> 00:20:18,467
Yeah, yeah.
382
00:20:18,550 --> 00:20:20,344
(sobbing)
383
00:20:20,427 --> 00:20:24,556
-What's wrong?
-Oh, yeah. Like you don't know.
384
00:20:24,640 --> 00:20:27,184
-We're gonna have sex.
-Oh.
385
00:20:27,267 --> 00:20:30,229
Well, we don't have to.
386
00:20:30,312 --> 00:20:33,607
Yes, we do.
The cookie told me so.
387
00:20:33,690 --> 00:20:36,860
Well, desserts
aren't always right.
388
00:20:36,944 --> 00:20:38,570
But they're so sweet.
389
00:20:38,654 --> 00:20:41,740
Homer,
390
00:20:41,823 --> 00:20:44,451
you don't have to do anything
you don't want to.
391
00:20:45,577 --> 00:20:49,414
Well, maybe I want to.
392
00:20:49,498 --> 00:20:52,376
But then I think about
Marge and the kids.
393
00:20:52,459 --> 00:20:54,378
Well, not the boy.
He drives me nuts.
394
00:20:54,461 --> 00:20:58,257
-Sometimes I'd just like to--
-Homer,
395
00:20:58,340 --> 00:21:02,886
you know how I feel,
so it's up to you.
396
00:21:02,970 --> 00:21:07,808
Look in your heart.
I think you'll see what you want.
397
00:21:14,314 --> 00:21:15,440
♪♪
398
00:21:23,115 --> 00:21:25,617
-Oh, baby.
-♪ My darling, I ♪
399
00:21:25,701 --> 00:21:28,245
This was a wonderful idea,
Homie.
400
00:21:28,328 --> 00:21:30,622
♪ Can't get enough
of your love, babe ♪
401
00:21:30,706 --> 00:21:32,958
Hey, there's a turkey
behind the bed!
402
00:21:33,041 --> 00:21:36,670
Mmm. Marge.
403
00:21:36,753 --> 00:21:38,964
(chuckling)
404
00:21:39,047 --> 00:21:44,011
HOMER: ♪ Oh, Margie, you came
and you found me a turkey ♪
405
00:21:44,094 --> 00:21:48,265
♪ On my vacation
away from workie ♪
406
00:21:48,348 --> 00:21:50,642
(wolf whistle, meowing)
407
00:21:50,726 --> 00:21:53,228
(imitating bed squeaking,
growls, pants)
408
00:21:53,312 --> 00:21:55,022
(barking, howling)
409
00:21:55,105 --> 00:21:56,982
(gibberish)
Hubba-hubba.
410
00:21:57,065 --> 00:21:58,525
(blow lands)
411
00:22:03,780 --> 00:22:06,033
♪♪
412
00:22:49,534 --> 00:22:50,619
Shh!
413
00:22:53,663 --> 00:22:56,875
CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY
ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.