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00:00:03,086 --> 00:00:05,922
{\an8}♪ The Simpsons ♪
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(chalk screeches)
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(bell rings)
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(work whistle blows)
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-(sucking)
-(register beeping)
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(jazzy solo)
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(tires screech)
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(tires screeching)
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(horn honks)
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(tires screech)
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D'oh!
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-Aah!
-(tires screech)
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{\an8}(engine revving)
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{\an8}ANNOUNCER:
Hey, Lance Murdock,
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{\an8}you just jumped
16 blazing school buses.
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{\an8}What are you
going to do now?
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{\an8}(groaning)
I'm going to Duff Gardens.
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{\an8}Duff Gardens--
home of the whiplash.
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{\an8}To be completed in 1994.
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{\an8}(Lance groaning)
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{\an8}(screaming)
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{\an8}(all screaming)
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{\an8}And the washing machine.
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{\an8}(choking, gasping)
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{\an8}ALL: Wow!
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{\an8}See the happiest fish
in the world
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{\an8}at our fabulous
Beer-quarium.
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{\an8}(moaning)
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{\an8}(belches)
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{\an8}Bart, warm up the car.
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{\an8}We're going
to Duff Gardens.
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{\an8}BOTH: Yay!
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{\an8}Now, what do we say
when we get to
the ticket booth?
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BOTH: We're under six.
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And I'm a college student.
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Kids, I have
some bad news.
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Your Great-Aunt Gladys has...
passed on.
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Gladys, Gladys...
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about yea high, blue hair,
big dent in her forehead?
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No, honey, Gladys looked
more like your Aunt Patty.
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(shuddering)
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Oh, yeah, there she is.
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The funeral's
in Littleneck Falls.
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Looks like we'll have to go
to Duff Gardens another time.
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We understand.
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No use complaining about
something you can't change.
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But I want to go
to Duff Gardens right now!
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00:03:02,432 --> 00:03:04,267
Oh, Homer,
quit pouting.
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(whines)
I'm not pouting.
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I'm mourning.
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Stupid dead woman.
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♪ On top of spaghetti ♪
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♪ All covered with cheese ♪
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♪ I lost my poor meatball ♪
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If you don't mind,
we're on our way to a funeral.
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♪ Ding dong,
the witch is dead ♪
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♪ Which old witch? ♪
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♪ The wicked witch ♪
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Homer!
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Patty, Selma, I'm sorry.
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He's hugging us.
What do we do?
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Just close your eyes
and think of MacGyver.
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(grunting)
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00:03:41,304 --> 00:03:44,057
Hey, Homer, this luggage
is crushing me.
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Hey, you don't hear
Lisa complaining.
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(muffled groan)
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I can't believe
Auntie Gladys is really gone.
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Her legend will live
forever.
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Yeah, the legend
of the dog-faced woman.
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00:04:03,201 --> 00:04:04,619
(laughing)
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00:04:04,702 --> 00:04:07,497
Legend of
the dog-faced woman.
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Oh, that's good.
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00:04:08,957 --> 00:04:10,333
Homer, that's
very rude of you.
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00:04:10,416 --> 00:04:12,168
What? D'ohhh!
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Could we please
stop somewhere?
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My butt's asleep.
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(slurping and chewing)
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All right, I'm almost there.
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Ohhh!
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Another place mat, sir?
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Please.
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While we're waiting for our pie,
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let's take a minute
to remember Great-Aunt Gladys.
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Hmm, wait a minute.
That was "Prince of Tides."
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Five...
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six...
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seven...
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eight...
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00:05:02,427 --> 00:05:03,594
What are you playing?
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-Counting game.
-That's nice.
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Nine...
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ten...
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{\an8}MINISTER: He was a good man.
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He was a kind man.
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He gave to his community
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and asked little in return.
He never--
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(whispering)
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That's a woman?
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Dear Lord!
100
00:05:23,406 --> 00:05:24,907
(laughs nervously)
101
00:05:24,991 --> 00:05:28,328
Uh, well... I guess most
of what I said can be salvaged.
102
00:05:28,411 --> 00:05:30,413
Take a seat, bozo.
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00:05:30,496 --> 00:05:33,458
And that eulogy better not
show up on the bill.
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I'll keep this short.
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Gladys lived alone, died alone.
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I guess you could say she was
a role model for Selma and me.
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She wasn't a rich woman...
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(grumbling)
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...but she was rich in spirit.
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Forgot my hat.
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Don't hassle the dead, boy.
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They have eerie powers.
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(snorts)
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I thought this thing
was gonna be catered.
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Boy, am I hungry.
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I mean, I'm really,
really hungry.
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It's just not fair, damn it!
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(sobbing)
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Oh...
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Good-bye, Great-Aunt Gladys.
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I wish I'd made
more of an effort
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to get to know you
these last few years.
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(raspy voice)
Don't worry about it.
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(screaming)
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(laughs malevolently)
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I'm Lionel Hutz, executor
of Ms. Bouvier's estate.
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She left a video will,
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00:06:43,444 --> 00:06:47,115
so I earn my fee simply by
pressing this "play" button.
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Pretty sweet, eh?
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I would like to start
by reading a passage
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from Robert Frost.
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"Two roads diverged
in a yellow wood, and..."
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(tape fast forwarding)
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Homer!
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All in favor
of skipping the poem?
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Thank you.
137
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"...and that has made
all the difference."
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Now, let's get down
to business.
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LIONEL HUTZ'S VOICE:
To my executor, Lionel Hutz,
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I leave $50,000.
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Mr. Hutz!
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You'd be surprised how often
that works, you really would.
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To Marge, I leave
my collection of
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potato chips that
resemble celebrities.
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They're all here.
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Otto von Bismarck,
Maurice Chevalier,
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right up to Jay Leno.
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These chips were
my children, Margery.
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Take special care of them.
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Uh-oh.
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To my sister, Jackie,
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I leave my pet iguana,
Jubjub.
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Why didn't she just leave me
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the bowel obstruction
that killed her?
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To my dear childless nieces,
Patty and Selma,
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I leave my grandfather clock
and these words:
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Don't die lonely like me.
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Raise a family,
and do it now.
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Now!
160
00:08:06,152 --> 00:08:07,278
Now!
161
00:08:07,361 --> 00:08:08,738
Now!!!
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00:08:08,821 --> 00:08:11,866
Hey, a grandfather clock.
Not bad.
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(clock tolling and ticking)
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(snoring)
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Aunt Gladys was right.
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There's something missing
in our lives.
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Don't worry.
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We'll get that barking dog
record tomorrow.
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Patty... I want a baby.
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What do I do here?
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Just tell us
about yourself.
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Well... I want to have a baby
before it's too late.
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You're looking
at a free lunch, boys.
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Come and get it.
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(amorous growling)
176
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Ach! Back to the loch
with you, Nessie.
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00:09:10,007 --> 00:09:13,844
One drop of this love potion,
178
00:09:13,928 --> 00:09:18,516
and you will have
any man you desire.
179
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Really?
180
00:09:19,684 --> 00:09:21,561
What are
the magical ingredients?
181
00:09:21,644 --> 00:09:23,688
Mostly corn syrup,
a little rubbing alcohol.
182
00:09:23,771 --> 00:09:25,356
You'll be lucky if it doesn't
183
00:09:25,439 --> 00:09:26,899
make your hair fall out,
actually.
184
00:09:28,776 --> 00:09:30,236
(grunting)
185
00:09:33,614 --> 00:09:34,991
Paper or plastic?
186
00:09:35,074 --> 00:09:37,410
You decide.
187
00:09:37,493 --> 00:09:39,996
So, wearing a belt, are you?
188
00:09:40,079 --> 00:09:40,997
Yep.
189
00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:42,665
No suspenders for you.
190
00:09:42,748 --> 00:09:44,750
I guess not.
191
00:09:44,834 --> 00:09:46,711
Orange is really your color.
192
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They make us
wear this.
193
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Shall we continue
this conversation over dinner?
194
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Uh... I'm not allowed
to date customers.
195
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It's store policy.
196
00:09:55,386 --> 00:09:56,470
No, it isn't.
197
00:09:56,554 --> 00:09:58,639
-Ow!
-shut up, Arnold.
198
00:09:58,723 --> 00:09:59,849
No, go for it, man.
199
00:09:59,932 --> 00:10:01,809
"R,"
200
00:10:01,892 --> 00:10:03,561
"Q,"
201
00:10:03,644 --> 00:10:04,729
"J,"
202
00:10:04,812 --> 00:10:07,857
question mark.
203
00:10:07,940 --> 00:10:09,108
Smiley face.
204
00:10:10,568 --> 00:10:12,153
SELMA: Next!
205
00:10:12,236 --> 00:10:13,487
Wait a minute.
206
00:10:13,571 --> 00:10:15,865
It says here
you're single.
207
00:10:15,948 --> 00:10:17,908
Did I do wrong?
208
00:10:17,992 --> 00:10:23,831
Combed, biscuits, chicken,
209
00:10:23,914 --> 00:10:26,959
yellow, mailman...
210
00:10:27,043 --> 00:10:29,128
You're reading
the wine list, sir.
211
00:10:29,211 --> 00:10:30,171
Very good.
212
00:10:32,506 --> 00:10:35,843
{\an8}I don't know how to
thank you for dinner.
213
00:10:35,926 --> 00:10:38,387
Use your imagination.
214
00:10:43,893 --> 00:10:45,728
(childish chatter)
215
00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:48,856
(child screaming)
216
00:10:48,939 --> 00:10:49,815
(thudding)
217
00:10:53,486 --> 00:10:54,695
Ehh!
218
00:10:54,779 --> 00:10:56,447
Get out of my car.
219
00:10:59,033 --> 00:11:01,327
This isn't my house.
220
00:11:01,410 --> 00:11:03,537
Come to Duff Gardens
221
00:11:03,621 --> 00:11:06,540
where roaming gangs aren't
a big problem anymore.
222
00:11:06,624 --> 00:11:09,210
Now featuring
the clean-shaven sounds
223
00:11:09,293 --> 00:11:11,504
of Hooray for Everything.
224
00:11:11,587 --> 00:11:12,672
ALL: Hey, kids,
225
00:11:12,755 --> 00:11:14,465
take a walk on
the wild side.
226
00:11:14,548 --> 00:11:16,133
And all the races sing:
227
00:11:16,217 --> 00:11:18,511
♪ Doo, doo, doo,
shoo-bee doobee doo ♪
228
00:11:18,594 --> 00:11:19,845
♪ Doo, doo, doo ♪
229
00:11:19,929 --> 00:11:21,972
♪ Shoo-bee doobee doo, yeah! ♪
230
00:11:22,056 --> 00:11:23,974
{\an8}Can we go to Duff Gardens
this weekend?
231
00:11:24,058 --> 00:11:27,103
Sure...
unless another aunt dies.
232
00:11:27,186 --> 00:11:28,479
(door closes)
233
00:11:28,562 --> 00:11:30,356
Selma, your date's
over already?
234
00:11:30,439 --> 00:11:33,109
Yeah.
I was so depressed,
235
00:11:33,192 --> 00:11:36,070
I ate a jar
of expired olives.
236
00:11:36,153 --> 00:11:37,405
(sighs)
237
00:11:37,488 --> 00:11:39,281
I guess I'll never
have a baby.
238
00:11:39,365 --> 00:11:41,409
Aunt Selma,
this may be presumptuous,
239
00:11:41,492 --> 00:11:43,911
but have you ever considered
artificial insemination?
240
00:11:43,994 --> 00:11:46,747
Boy, I don't know.
241
00:11:46,831 --> 00:11:48,499
You've got to be
pretty desperate
242
00:11:48,582 --> 00:11:50,167
to make it with a robot.
243
00:11:50,251 --> 00:11:51,961
(whispering)
244
00:11:52,044 --> 00:11:55,464
I knew that.
245
00:11:55,548 --> 00:11:56,924
How do I know
I'm getting quality?
246
00:11:57,007 --> 00:11:58,634
Don't worry.
247
00:11:58,718 --> 00:12:01,345
Our donors have to pass
a rigorous screening process.
248
00:12:01,429 --> 00:12:03,097
All done.
249
00:12:03,180 --> 00:12:04,807
Thank you.
250
00:12:04,890 --> 00:12:06,308
Always a pleasure.
251
00:12:06,392 --> 00:12:08,102
What a beautiful
little girl.
252
00:12:08,185 --> 00:12:09,186
(belches like Barney)
253
00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:11,355
(babies belching like Barney)
254
00:12:11,439 --> 00:12:14,525
(belching continues)
255
00:12:14,608 --> 00:12:17,361
MARGE: "101 Frozen Pops."
256
00:12:17,445 --> 00:12:19,822
A Nobel Prize winner.
257
00:12:19,905 --> 00:12:22,366
An NBA all-star.
258
00:12:22,450 --> 00:12:26,203
Ooh, one of the Sweathogs.
259
00:12:26,287 --> 00:12:27,955
I checked.
It's not Horshack.
260
00:12:28,038 --> 00:12:29,832
(groans)
261
00:12:29,915 --> 00:12:32,960
Are you sure you want
to have a baby this way?
262
00:12:33,043 --> 00:12:35,588
Yeah, you've had some
pretty bad experiences
263
00:12:35,671 --> 00:12:37,173
ordering out of catalogs.
264
00:12:37,256 --> 00:12:39,133
Remember that
mail-order husband?
265
00:12:39,216 --> 00:12:40,843
(knock at door)
266
00:12:43,179 --> 00:12:46,682
Ooh, you look just like
your picture.
267
00:12:46,766 --> 00:12:48,392
Sorry, my mind's made up.
268
00:12:48,476 --> 00:12:50,436
I want to have a kid,
269
00:12:50,519 --> 00:12:52,271
and this is the only way
I can do it.
270
00:12:52,354 --> 00:12:54,440
Why do you want
to have a baby so bad?
271
00:12:54,523 --> 00:12:56,984
I got a lot of love to give,
272
00:12:57,067 --> 00:12:59,445
and right now my only outlet
273
00:12:59,528 --> 00:13:01,238
is my ham radio.
274
00:13:01,322 --> 00:13:03,908
{\an8}(man speaking
foreign language)
275
00:13:03,991 --> 00:13:05,868
Are you sure you've
thought this through?
276
00:13:05,951 --> 00:13:07,953
A child can really
change your life.
277
00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:09,663
You'll have to
give up smoking.
278
00:13:09,747 --> 00:13:11,957
-I'll chew.
-No man will want you.
279
00:13:12,041 --> 00:13:15,252
All I got now
is sperm in a cup.
280
00:13:15,336 --> 00:13:17,630
(both groaning)
281
00:13:19,507 --> 00:13:20,883
BART/LISA: Get up! Get up!
282
00:13:20,966 --> 00:13:22,676
Time to go
to Duff Gardens.
283
00:13:22,760 --> 00:13:23,886
Mom! Mom!
284
00:13:23,969 --> 00:13:25,763
We want to go
to Duff Gardens!
285
00:13:27,348 --> 00:13:29,725
Oh, great.
Dad's dead.
286
00:13:29,809 --> 00:13:32,895
(moaning)
287
00:13:32,978 --> 00:13:36,732
Oh, have you been eating
that sandwich again?
288
00:13:36,816 --> 00:13:38,943
Sand... wich.
289
00:13:40,736 --> 00:13:43,781
Geez, we hardly made a dent
in that ten-foot hoagie.
290
00:13:43,864 --> 00:13:45,658
I'll give it
a good home.
291
00:13:47,785 --> 00:13:49,870
You've been eating that thing
for a week.
292
00:13:49,954 --> 00:13:52,122
I think the mayonnaise
is starting to turn.
293
00:13:52,206 --> 00:13:54,792
Two more feet,
and I can fit it in the fridge.
294
00:13:54,875 --> 00:13:57,503
Homer, I found this
behind the radiator.
295
00:13:57,586 --> 00:13:59,463
I really think
you should throw it away.
296
00:13:59,547 --> 00:14:01,382
Suggestion noted.
297
00:14:03,884 --> 00:14:07,763
Marge, I'd like to be alone
with the sandwich for a moment.
298
00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:10,474
Are you going
to eat it?
299
00:14:10,558 --> 00:14:11,600
Yes.
300
00:14:12,810 --> 00:14:14,311
Aww!
301
00:14:14,395 --> 00:14:16,647
You look terrible.
302
00:14:16,730 --> 00:14:17,731
I don't care.
303
00:14:17,815 --> 00:14:19,900
I'm going to Duff Gardens.
304
00:14:21,026 --> 00:14:22,570
(thud)
305
00:14:25,614 --> 00:14:27,741
S-s-so cold.
306
00:14:27,825 --> 00:14:29,743
Your lips
are turning blue.
307
00:14:29,827 --> 00:14:31,954
I think
you better stay home.
308
00:14:32,037 --> 00:14:33,581
No!
309
00:14:33,664 --> 00:14:36,625
Duff Gardens! Hurrah!
310
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:38,294
(horn blaring)
311
00:14:38,377 --> 00:14:40,796
We really appreciate
you taking the children
312
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:42,590
on such short notice.
313
00:14:42,673 --> 00:14:44,508
We'll have fun,
won't we, kids?
314
00:14:44,592 --> 00:14:47,469
To get to Duff Gardens,
I'd ride with Satan himself.
315
00:14:47,553 --> 00:14:48,721
That's the spirit.
316
00:14:48,804 --> 00:14:50,014
See you tonight.
317
00:14:50,097 --> 00:14:51,640
Good-bye, Dad.
318
00:14:51,724 --> 00:14:52,725
Don't eat any solids.
319
00:14:52,808 --> 00:14:54,518
But I love solids.
320
00:14:54,602 --> 00:14:56,937
It won't be any fun
without you, Dad.
321
00:14:57,021 --> 00:14:59,356
BOTH: Yayyy!
322
00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:02,610
This is all your fault!
323
00:15:02,693 --> 00:15:06,780
I-- Oh, how can I
stay mad at you?
324
00:15:06,864 --> 00:15:07,990
Mmm!
325
00:15:08,073 --> 00:15:09,283
Ooh...
326
00:15:14,872 --> 00:15:16,373
There it is!
327
00:15:16,457 --> 00:15:18,500
The Duff beeramid.
328
00:15:20,586 --> 00:15:22,880
"The beeramid contains
so much aluminum
329
00:15:22,963 --> 00:15:25,341
"it would take five men
to lift it.
330
00:15:25,424 --> 00:15:28,886
22 immigrant laborers died
during its construction."
331
00:15:28,969 --> 00:15:31,138
Ah, plenty more where that
came from.
332
00:15:31,221 --> 00:15:34,642
♪♪ (theme park music)
333
00:15:34,725 --> 00:15:36,644
Look! It's
the seven Duffs!
334
00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:37,978
BART: There's Tipsy.
335
00:15:38,062 --> 00:15:39,355
And there's Queasy.
336
00:15:39,438 --> 00:15:40,397
LISA: There's Surly.
337
00:15:40,481 --> 00:15:41,440
And Remorseful.
338
00:15:41,523 --> 00:15:42,858
Hey.
339
00:15:42,942 --> 00:15:45,152
Take a picture--
it'll last longer.
340
00:15:45,235 --> 00:15:46,362
Get out of here.
341
00:15:49,740 --> 00:15:52,618
Four score and seven years ago,
342
00:15:52,701 --> 00:15:54,370
we took the finest hops
and barley
343
00:15:54,453 --> 00:15:57,289
to brew a refreshing,
full-bodied lager.
344
00:15:59,333 --> 00:16:00,668
Ahhh.
345
00:16:00,751 --> 00:16:02,628
(beat boxing)
346
00:16:02,711 --> 00:16:04,588
Well...
347
00:16:04,672 --> 00:16:06,840
♪ I'm rappin' A.B.,
and I'm here to say ♪
348
00:16:06,924 --> 00:16:09,051
♪ If you want to drink beer,
Duff's the only way ♪
349
00:16:09,134 --> 00:16:10,803
♪ I said, the only way ♪
350
00:16:10,886 --> 00:16:13,889
♪ Break down ♪
351
00:16:13,973 --> 00:16:15,933
This is a disgrace.
352
00:16:16,016 --> 00:16:18,060
Settle down.
353
00:16:18,143 --> 00:16:19,812
Anything this bad
has to be educational.
354
00:16:19,895 --> 00:16:21,355
Bart!
355
00:16:21,438 --> 00:16:23,649
Let's see if they wore
underwear back then.
356
00:16:23,732 --> 00:16:26,318
Yeah!
357
00:16:26,402 --> 00:16:28,153
Do you feel any better?
358
00:16:28,237 --> 00:16:30,072
No.
359
00:16:30,155 --> 00:16:31,824
What are the odds
of getting sick on a Saturday?
360
00:16:31,907 --> 00:16:33,367
A thousand to one.
361
00:16:33,450 --> 00:16:36,036
To cheer you up, I rented
a couple of videos.
362
00:16:36,120 --> 00:16:38,706
"Boxing's Greatest Weigh-Ins"
and "Yentl."
363
00:16:38,789 --> 00:16:40,708
"Yentl"? What's that?
364
00:16:40,791 --> 00:16:42,418
It deals with a bookish
young woman's efforts
365
00:16:42,501 --> 00:16:44,211
to enter rabbinical school.
366
00:16:44,294 --> 00:16:45,671
Sounds great!
367
00:16:45,754 --> 00:16:48,674
Oh, my God,
you're delirious.
368
00:16:48,757 --> 00:16:50,676
Hmm...
369
00:16:53,053 --> 00:16:54,930
(Bart reading)
370
00:16:58,851 --> 00:17:00,185
Wow!
371
00:17:00,269 --> 00:17:02,646
You're charming the pants
off of me.
372
00:17:02,730 --> 00:17:04,773
What did you say,
Aunt Selma?
373
00:17:04,857 --> 00:17:06,608
I said take off
those damn glasses!
374
00:17:06,692 --> 00:17:09,445
Ooh, this looks like fun.
375
00:17:09,528 --> 00:17:11,030
A bench.
376
00:17:11,113 --> 00:17:13,574
Kids, what do you say
you go get your Aunt Selma
377
00:17:13,657 --> 00:17:15,075
a beer smoothie?
378
00:17:15,159 --> 00:17:18,078
BOTH: No, come on, Aunt Selma,
we got to go.
379
00:17:18,162 --> 00:17:20,748
Come on,
let's have fun!
380
00:17:23,083 --> 00:17:25,919
(groaning)
381
00:17:26,003 --> 00:17:28,839
Hey, man, if the line's
this long, it's got to be good.
382
00:17:31,425 --> 00:17:33,177
Get bent.
383
00:17:33,260 --> 00:17:35,387
MAN (on TV):
What's going on here?
384
00:17:35,471 --> 00:17:38,140
Oh, Yentl.
I might have known.
385
00:17:38,223 --> 00:17:41,226
That Yentl puts the "she"
in yeshiva.
386
00:17:41,310 --> 00:17:43,687
Hmm, well,
you've cooled down.
387
00:17:43,771 --> 00:17:45,272
That's what you think.
388
00:17:45,355 --> 00:17:46,815
(growling)
389
00:17:46,899 --> 00:17:48,067
(chuckling)
390
00:17:48,150 --> 00:17:50,444
You know, I rented
another tape
391
00:17:50,527 --> 00:17:52,404
in case you felt better.
392
00:17:52,488 --> 00:17:55,949
"The Erotic Adventures
of Hercules."
393
00:17:56,033 --> 00:17:57,951
With Norman Fell as Zeus.
394
00:17:58,035 --> 00:17:59,328
Whoo-hoo!
395
00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:01,121
♪ Duff beer for me ♪
396
00:18:01,205 --> 00:18:03,123
♪ Duff beer for you ♪
397
00:18:03,207 --> 00:18:05,125
♪ I'll have a Duff ♪
398
00:18:05,209 --> 00:18:07,127
♪ You have one, too ♪
399
00:18:07,211 --> 00:18:08,921
♪ Duff beer for me ♪
400
00:18:09,004 --> 00:18:10,923
♪ Duff beer for you ♪
401
00:18:11,006 --> 00:18:12,633
♪ I'll have a Duff ♪
402
00:18:12,716 --> 00:18:14,510
♪ You have one, too ♪
403
00:18:14,593 --> 00:18:16,637
♪ Duff beer for me ♪
404
00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:17,721
♪ Duff beer for you... ♪
405
00:18:17,805 --> 00:18:19,723
I want to get off.
406
00:18:19,807 --> 00:18:21,100
You can't get off.
407
00:18:21,183 --> 00:18:22,810
We have five more continents
to visit.
408
00:18:22,893 --> 00:18:25,479
Hey, Lis, I dare you
to drink the water.
409
00:18:25,562 --> 00:18:27,898
I'm not sure
that is water.
410
00:18:27,981 --> 00:18:29,066
Chicken.
411
00:18:29,149 --> 00:18:30,734
(clucking)
412
00:18:30,818 --> 00:18:31,944
Quit it, Bart.
413
00:18:32,027 --> 00:18:33,070
Quit it!
414
00:18:33,153 --> 00:18:34,571
Quit it! Quit it!
415
00:18:34,655 --> 00:18:35,614
Bart, be quiet.
416
00:18:35,697 --> 00:18:37,116
Lisa, drink
the water.
417
00:18:40,744 --> 00:18:42,955
(sighing)
418
00:18:43,038 --> 00:18:44,957
(distorted)
♪ Duff beer for me ♪
419
00:18:45,040 --> 00:18:46,959
♪ Duff beer for you ♪
420
00:18:47,042 --> 00:18:50,254
♪ I'll have a Duff,
Duff, Duff, Duff... ♪
421
00:18:50,337 --> 00:18:52,131
They're all around me.
422
00:18:52,214 --> 00:18:53,841
No way out!
423
00:18:53,924 --> 00:18:55,592
(insane laughter)
424
00:18:55,676 --> 00:18:57,761
No way out, I tell you!
425
00:18:57,845 --> 00:18:59,555
What's wrong?
426
00:18:59,638 --> 00:19:01,932
Well, you just put your head
right here.
427
00:19:02,015 --> 00:19:03,851
(snarling)
428
00:19:03,934 --> 00:19:06,019
(maniacal scream)
429
00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:13,610
Hercules, the Cyclops
tore off my clothes.
430
00:19:13,694 --> 00:19:15,070
(laughing)
431
00:19:15,154 --> 00:19:16,697
(giggling)
432
00:19:18,949 --> 00:19:20,951
(snarling)
433
00:19:21,034 --> 00:19:23,036
♪ I'll have a Duff ♪
434
00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:25,330
♪ You have one, too... ♪
435
00:19:25,414 --> 00:19:27,708
Bart! Lisa!
436
00:19:27,791 --> 00:19:30,252
♪♪ (lively)
437
00:19:30,335 --> 00:19:32,880
LISA: Ahh...
438
00:19:32,963 --> 00:19:34,840
Oh...
439
00:19:37,134 --> 00:19:40,304
(humming)
440
00:19:40,387 --> 00:19:44,641
Ahh... I can see the music.
441
00:19:47,311 --> 00:19:49,897
Mitch, you're doing
a bang-up job.
442
00:19:49,980 --> 00:19:51,273
Thank you, sir.
443
00:19:51,356 --> 00:19:53,066
(chuckling)
444
00:19:57,362 --> 00:19:59,281
Whoa, that isn't good.
445
00:19:59,364 --> 00:20:02,993
(screaming)
446
00:20:03,076 --> 00:20:04,536
Stop the ride!!
447
00:20:04,620 --> 00:20:07,789
I'll have to ask my supervisor.
448
00:20:07,873 --> 00:20:09,791
Better stop it.
449
00:20:13,253 --> 00:20:14,755
Can't you do something?
450
00:20:14,838 --> 00:20:17,799
Hey. Surly only looks out
for one guy-- Surly.
451
00:20:17,883 --> 00:20:20,135
-Sorry, Surly.
-Shut up.
452
00:20:20,219 --> 00:20:22,387
SELMA:
Don't blame these kids.
453
00:20:23,680 --> 00:20:24,973
It's not their fault.
454
00:20:25,057 --> 00:20:27,726
I think their father
is missing a chromosome.
455
00:20:27,809 --> 00:20:30,687
Miss Bouvier,
while we were rescuing this boy,
456
00:20:30,771 --> 00:20:33,482
hoodlums made off
with three bumper cars!
457
00:20:33,565 --> 00:20:35,484
(cars bumping)
458
00:20:35,567 --> 00:20:36,777
(laughter)
459
00:20:40,906 --> 00:20:42,866
And I don't think
George Washington
460
00:20:42,950 --> 00:20:44,076
will ever be the same.
461
00:20:44,159 --> 00:20:46,078
Ai yi, yi, yi, yi...
462
00:20:46,161 --> 00:20:50,207
We found this one swimming
naked in the fermentarium.
463
00:20:50,290 --> 00:20:53,293
I am the lizard queen!
464
00:20:53,377 --> 00:20:55,963
Give her this,
and this,
465
00:20:56,046 --> 00:20:58,757
and then these.
466
00:20:58,840 --> 00:21:00,175
Thank you, doctor.
467
00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:01,677
Oh, I'm not a doctor.
468
00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:05,097
Come to Homercles.
469
00:21:05,180 --> 00:21:06,723
(giggling)
470
00:21:06,807 --> 00:21:08,809
I can't.
The beans will burn.
471
00:21:08,892 --> 00:21:11,812
Homercles cares not for beans.
472
00:21:13,689 --> 00:21:16,608
Hi, kids.
How was Duff Gardens?
473
00:21:16,692 --> 00:21:19,611
Can't talk. Coming down.
474
00:21:19,695 --> 00:21:21,613
Hmmm...
475
00:21:21,697 --> 00:21:23,824
How do you do it, Homer?
476
00:21:23,907 --> 00:21:26,535
You take an ordinary bed sheet,
fold it around like this--
477
00:21:26,618 --> 00:21:30,289
No, I mean raising kids.
478
00:21:30,372 --> 00:21:33,166
I just couldn't cut it today.
479
00:21:33,250 --> 00:21:35,919
All I wanted was
a little version of me
480
00:21:36,003 --> 00:21:37,921
that I could hold in my arms.
481
00:21:38,005 --> 00:21:39,881
Oh, Jubjub.
482
00:21:43,093 --> 00:21:44,511
When I went to pick him up,
483
00:21:44,594 --> 00:21:47,264
Mom was trying to stab him
with a hat pin.
484
00:21:47,347 --> 00:21:49,391
Shh.
485
00:21:49,474 --> 00:21:53,979
♪ You make me feel ♪
486
00:21:54,062 --> 00:21:56,398
♪ You make me feel ♪
487
00:21:56,481 --> 00:22:01,695
♪ Like a natural woman ♪
488
00:22:05,699 --> 00:22:09,411
{\an8}♪ Oh, baby,
what you've done to me ♪
489
00:22:09,494 --> 00:22:13,623
{\an8}CHORUS:
♪ What you've done to me ♪
490
00:22:13,707 --> 00:22:18,879
{\an8}♪ You make me feel
so good inside ♪
491
00:22:18,962 --> 00:22:22,632
{\an8}CHORUS: ♪ Good inside ♪
492
00:22:22,716 --> 00:22:26,887
{\an8}♪ And I just want to be ♪
493
00:22:26,970 --> 00:22:29,389
{\an8}CHORUS: ♪ Want to be ♪
494
00:22:29,473 --> 00:22:30,891
{\an8}♪ Close to you ♪
495
00:22:30,974 --> 00:22:35,062
{\an8}♪ You make me feel
so alive ♪
496
00:22:35,145 --> 00:22:39,399
{\an8}♪ 'Cause you make me feel ♪
497
00:22:39,483 --> 00:22:43,403
{\an8}♪ You make me feel ♪
498
00:22:43,487 --> 00:22:46,406
{\an8}♪ You make me feel ♪
499
00:22:46,490 --> 00:22:52,204
{\an8}♪ Like a natural woman ♪
500
00:22:52,287 --> 00:22:53,622
{\an8}SELMA: Oh, yeah.
501
00:22:55,374 --> 00:22:56,333
Shh!
502
00:22:59,336 --> 00:23:02,214
{\an8}CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY
ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.