1 00:00:03,086 --> 00:00:06,589 {\an8}♪ The Simpsons ♪ 2 00:00:06,673 --> 00:00:07,799 (tires screech) 3 00:00:09,551 --> 00:00:10,719 D'oh! 4 00:00:10,802 --> 00:00:12,929 -Aah! -(tires screech) 5 00:00:27,235 --> 00:00:28,862 {\an8}ANNOUNCER: Live, from the famous 6 00:00:28,945 --> 00:00:30,363 {\an8}Brown Sands of Public Beach, Delaware, 7 00:00:30,447 --> 00:00:32,490 {\an8}it's the... 8 00:00:34,743 --> 00:00:38,913 {\an8}Oh... Saturday afternoon TV is so boring. 9 00:00:38,997 --> 00:00:41,374 {\an8}-ANNOUNCER: Bikini girls. -Hmm? 10 00:00:41,458 --> 00:00:43,752 {\an8}-Dune buggies. -All right! 11 00:00:43,835 --> 00:00:47,547 {\an8}-Daredevil surfers. -(gasps) 12 00:00:47,630 --> 00:00:49,841 {\an8}Ordinarily, this beach would be swarming with them, 13 00:00:49,924 --> 00:00:51,551 {\an8}but not today-- Oh, no! 14 00:00:51,634 --> 00:00:53,261 {\an8}They've all been cleared out 15 00:00:53,344 --> 00:00:55,889 {\an8}to make way for painstaking sand preparation. 16 00:00:55,972 --> 00:00:57,474 {\an8}That's right, Dick. You know, this year, 17 00:00:57,557 --> 00:00:59,017 {\an8}everyone's a-buzz about one thing: 18 00:00:59,100 --> 00:01:01,436 {\an8}the absence of Mark Rodkin. 19 00:01:01,519 --> 00:01:02,937 {\an8}Oh, wait. There he is. 20 00:01:03,021 --> 00:01:05,023 {\an8}(deep yawn) 21 00:01:05,106 --> 00:01:06,733 {\an8}Marge, I'm bored. 22 00:01:06,816 --> 00:01:08,234 {\an8}Why don't you read something? 23 00:01:08,318 --> 00:01:10,904 {\an8}Because I'm trying to reduce my boredom. 24 00:01:10,987 --> 00:01:12,072 {\an8}Well, you could hand out these flyers 25 00:01:12,155 --> 00:01:14,449 {\an8}for the neighborhood rummage sale. 26 00:01:14,532 --> 00:01:16,785 {\an8}You'd get some fresh air and exercise. 27 00:01:16,868 --> 00:01:18,953 {\an8}Eh, I'll do it anyway. 28 00:01:19,037 --> 00:01:21,498 {\an8}Come on, boy. We're going to see the neighbors. 29 00:01:24,918 --> 00:01:26,586 {\an8}Good old Evergreen Terrace... 30 00:01:26,669 --> 00:01:28,088 {\an8}the swankiest street 31 00:01:28,171 --> 00:01:30,799 {\an8}in the classiest part of Pressboard Estates. 32 00:01:30,882 --> 00:01:33,009 {\an8}If you love it so much, why are you always littering? 33 00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:34,928 {\an8}It's easier. Duh. 34 00:01:39,891 --> 00:01:41,184 ♪ The dream police ♪ 35 00:01:41,267 --> 00:01:43,228 ♪ They live inside of my bed ♪ 36 00:01:43,311 --> 00:01:44,562 ♪ The dream police ♪ 37 00:01:44,646 --> 00:01:46,481 ♪ They come to me in my head ♪ 38 00:01:46,564 --> 00:01:48,483 ♪ The dream police ♪ 39 00:01:48,566 --> 00:01:49,943 ♪ They're going to direct me now ♪ 40 00:01:50,026 --> 00:01:53,363 ♪ Oh, no... ♪ 41 00:01:53,446 --> 00:01:55,740 Howdy, neighbor. 42 00:01:55,824 --> 00:01:58,493 May I spray you with the hose in a playful fashion? 43 00:01:58,576 --> 00:01:59,828 Eh... spray the boy. 44 00:01:59,911 --> 00:02:02,831 (choking) 45 00:02:02,914 --> 00:02:05,125 Well, ready for the big rummage sale? 46 00:02:05,208 --> 00:02:06,334 Oh, yes, indeed. 47 00:02:06,417 --> 00:02:07,836 I've got nothing but time 48 00:02:07,919 --> 00:02:10,630 until they fix that malfunctioning Squishee machine. 49 00:02:20,765 --> 00:02:23,351 HOMER: Hey, I never noticed this place. 50 00:02:23,434 --> 00:02:26,062 Dad, it's right across the street from us. 51 00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:28,565 That fancy house will never sell. 52 00:02:28,648 --> 00:02:29,983 Nobody who could afford it 53 00:02:30,066 --> 00:02:31,359 would want to live in this neighborhood. 54 00:02:31,442 --> 00:02:33,111 Hey, what's wrong with this neighborhood? 55 00:02:33,194 --> 00:02:36,781 Big shot! Too good to buy a house here, snobby? 56 00:02:36,865 --> 00:02:37,991 Who are you talking to, Homer? 57 00:02:38,074 --> 00:02:39,409 The guy who doesn't live there. 58 00:02:39,492 --> 00:02:41,703 {\an8}Can we get rid of this Ayatollah t-shirt? 59 00:02:41,786 --> 00:02:43,997 Khomeini died years ago. 60 00:02:44,080 --> 00:02:46,457 But, Marge, it works on any Ayatollah. 61 00:02:46,541 --> 00:02:49,627 Ayatollah Nakhbadeh, Ayatollah Zahedi... 62 00:02:49,711 --> 00:02:51,504 even as we speak, Ayatollah Razmara 63 00:02:51,588 --> 00:02:54,382 and his cadre of fanatics are consolidating their power. 64 00:02:54,465 --> 00:02:57,427 I don't care who's consolidating their power. 65 00:02:57,510 --> 00:02:59,137 Well, we don't need this. 66 00:02:59,220 --> 00:03:02,724 But, Marge, that's the Rhinestone Nights fashion gun. 67 00:03:02,807 --> 00:03:05,226 I need it to rhinestone up my old clothing. 68 00:03:05,310 --> 00:03:06,769 Who's Disco Stu? 69 00:03:06,853 --> 00:03:09,647 I wanted to write disco stud, but I ran out of space. 70 00:03:09,731 --> 00:03:13,151 Not that Disco Stu didn't get his share of the action. 71 00:03:17,405 --> 00:03:20,408 So if you're looking for a half bag of charcoal briquettes 72 00:03:20,491 --> 00:03:22,744 or an artificial Christmas tree-- trunk only-- 73 00:03:22,827 --> 00:03:25,163 come on over to the Hibbard table, pronto. 74 00:03:25,246 --> 00:03:26,497 Well, sir, looks like we got 75 00:03:26,581 --> 00:03:28,458 some nice items here at table Glick. 76 00:03:28,541 --> 00:03:31,252 Like this... what the heckaroonie is this, Mrs. Glick? 77 00:03:31,336 --> 00:03:34,255 It is a candy dish, Ned. $90. 78 00:03:34,339 --> 00:03:36,507 Uh-huh. Well, I, uh... 79 00:03:36,591 --> 00:03:38,593 I guess you could put a lot of nice things in there. 80 00:03:38,676 --> 00:03:41,512 No! Just candy, Ned. $90. 81 00:03:45,767 --> 00:03:48,394 Well, looks like somebody sold something today. 82 00:03:50,939 --> 00:03:53,233 Are you interested in that motorized tie rack, 83 00:03:53,316 --> 00:03:54,609 Principal Skinner? 84 00:03:54,692 --> 00:03:56,986 (motor whirring) 85 00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,529 Hmm... it's awfully loud. 86 00:03:58,613 --> 00:04:01,574 Well, you can always take the motor out 87 00:04:01,658 --> 00:04:03,785 and use it as an ordinary tie rack. 88 00:04:03,868 --> 00:04:06,079 But now the ties are motionless 89 00:04:06,162 --> 00:04:08,957 and those in back are virtually inaccessible. 90 00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:10,291 Well, it's a moot point, 91 00:04:10,375 --> 00:04:11,918 as I have only one tie to begin with. 92 00:04:12,001 --> 00:04:14,087 I believe I'll pass. 93 00:04:15,713 --> 00:04:17,173 Have you sold that tie rack yet? 94 00:04:17,257 --> 00:04:18,383 -No. -I'll take it. 95 00:04:18,466 --> 00:04:20,593 Now, folks, nothing spells fun 96 00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:23,680 like rhinestones on a dungaree jacket. 97 00:04:23,763 --> 00:04:25,139 Stu, you should buy that. 98 00:04:25,223 --> 00:04:29,185 Hey, Disco Stu doesn't advertise. 99 00:04:29,269 --> 00:04:32,355 Uh... hey, Ned, let me help you with that. 100 00:04:32,438 --> 00:04:35,066 Hey, everybody! Who thinks Flanders should shut up? 101 00:04:35,149 --> 00:04:36,150 (all yelling in agreement) 102 00:04:38,111 --> 00:04:41,364 So, anyone here from Evergreen Terrace? 103 00:04:41,447 --> 00:04:43,157 (applause and cheering) 104 00:04:43,241 --> 00:04:45,535 I think this is the best neighborhood in town. 105 00:04:45,618 --> 00:04:46,953 Anybody agree with me? 106 00:04:47,036 --> 00:04:47,954 (cheering) 107 00:04:48,037 --> 00:04:49,664 You're the king, Homer! 108 00:04:49,747 --> 00:04:51,249 King of the neighborhood. 109 00:04:51,332 --> 00:04:55,545 Say, that Ayatollah thinks he's better than America. 110 00:04:55,628 --> 00:04:56,671 Is he right? 111 00:04:56,754 --> 00:04:58,089 (booing) 112 00:04:58,172 --> 00:04:59,841 MAN: Yes. 113 00:04:59,924 --> 00:05:03,845 Well, for only five dollars, you can sock it to him in style. 114 00:05:03,928 --> 00:05:04,887 Right here! 115 00:05:04,971 --> 00:05:06,264 And for the man 116 00:05:06,347 --> 00:05:09,475 who has everything, a tie rack motor. 117 00:05:09,559 --> 00:05:10,852 I'll take that. 118 00:05:10,935 --> 00:05:15,773 (jazzy up-tempo music playing) 119 00:05:15,857 --> 00:05:17,734 ♪ Hey, big spender ♪ 120 00:05:17,817 --> 00:05:19,986 ♪ Dig this blender ♪ 121 00:05:20,069 --> 00:05:22,196 ♪ Rainbow suspenders ♪ 122 00:05:22,280 --> 00:05:24,282 ♪ Hey, big spender ♪ 123 00:05:24,365 --> 00:05:26,451 ALL: ♪ We surrender ♪ 124 00:05:28,453 --> 00:05:31,080 ♪ Spend ♪ 125 00:05:31,164 --> 00:05:34,208 ♪ Some dough at table three ♪ 126 00:05:34,292 --> 00:05:36,044 (cheering and applause) 127 00:05:36,127 --> 00:05:37,754 (truck horn honks) 128 00:05:37,837 --> 00:05:39,422 (all murmuring) 129 00:05:40,798 --> 00:05:42,550 Thank you, neighbors, thank you. 130 00:05:42,633 --> 00:05:46,929 Now, let's give it up for table five. 131 00:05:47,013 --> 00:05:48,973 ♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah ♪ 132 00:05:49,057 --> 00:05:50,683 ♪ Table five, table five ♪ 133 00:05:50,767 --> 00:05:52,602 ♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah ♪ 134 00:05:52,685 --> 00:05:54,979 ♪ Table five ♪ 135 00:06:00,818 --> 00:06:04,739 ♪ Table five, table five... ♪ 136 00:06:04,822 --> 00:06:07,116 Hey, what's the big deal? 137 00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:09,077 It's just some new guy moving in. 138 00:06:09,160 --> 00:06:10,244 (clears throat) 139 00:06:10,328 --> 00:06:12,747 Disco Stu likes disco music. 140 00:06:15,708 --> 00:06:16,793 (electronic feedback) 141 00:06:26,719 --> 00:06:28,096 Hi there, neighbors. 142 00:06:28,179 --> 00:06:30,014 I'm... George Bush. 143 00:06:33,476 --> 00:06:36,020 Former President George Bush? 144 00:06:36,104 --> 00:06:38,815 (murmurs of recognition) 145 00:06:38,898 --> 00:06:42,610 HOMER: Okay, let's give it up for the new guy. 146 00:06:42,693 --> 00:06:46,280 Now let's all turn around and pay attention to me again. 147 00:06:46,364 --> 00:06:47,615 Hello? 148 00:06:47,698 --> 00:06:49,784 Hello? 149 00:06:49,867 --> 00:06:51,035 Hello? 150 00:06:54,747 --> 00:06:58,459 {\an8}Wow! A former President living right across the street. 151 00:06:58,543 --> 00:07:00,878 Oh! Why did he have to move in on my territory? 152 00:07:00,962 --> 00:07:02,338 Look at him. 153 00:07:02,422 --> 00:07:04,132 Thinks just because he led the free world 154 00:07:04,215 --> 00:07:05,633 he can act like a big shot. 155 00:07:05,716 --> 00:07:07,385 Stupid President. 156 00:07:07,468 --> 00:07:09,679 Why couldn't he just stay in his own state? 157 00:07:09,762 --> 00:07:10,972 Actually, this is one of the nine states 158 00:07:11,055 --> 00:07:13,724 where Mr. Bush claims residency, Dad. 159 00:07:13,808 --> 00:07:15,518 I wouldn't have voted for him 160 00:07:15,601 --> 00:07:17,228 but it's nice to have a celebrity in the neighborhood. 161 00:07:17,311 --> 00:07:18,688 Wait a minute. 162 00:07:18,771 --> 00:07:20,523 If Lisa didn't vote for him 163 00:07:20,606 --> 00:07:22,358 and I didn't vote for him... 164 00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:24,110 You didn't vote for anybody. 165 00:07:24,193 --> 00:07:27,989 I voted for Prell to go back to the old glass bottle. 166 00:07:28,072 --> 00:07:30,116 After that, I became deeply cynical. 167 00:07:30,199 --> 00:07:32,910 And your business here, Mr. Flanders? 168 00:07:32,994 --> 00:07:35,121 Well, sir, I'm welcoming the Bushes 169 00:07:35,204 --> 00:07:36,581 on behalf of the Neighborhood Association. 170 00:07:38,207 --> 00:07:39,709 Never mind about that, Ray. 171 00:07:39,792 --> 00:07:41,294 Just give them a quick pass with the metal detector 172 00:07:41,377 --> 00:07:42,795 and let them on in. 173 00:07:42,879 --> 00:07:44,589 Hey, Bar! The neighbors are here. 174 00:07:46,090 --> 00:07:47,550 Howdily-doodily there, President Bush 175 00:07:47,633 --> 00:07:50,136 or should I say President neighbor? 176 00:07:50,219 --> 00:07:53,806 I'm Ned Flanders and this is Maude, Rod and Todd. 177 00:07:53,890 --> 00:07:56,017 Well, howdily-doodily yourself there, Ned. 178 00:07:56,100 --> 00:07:57,643 This is my wife, Barbara. 179 00:07:57,727 --> 00:07:59,770 Call her Bar. Would you like some lemonade? 180 00:07:59,854 --> 00:08:01,731 -Tip-top-notch! -Okily-dokily. 181 00:08:01,814 --> 00:08:03,441 Thankily-dankily. 182 00:08:03,524 --> 00:08:04,442 Greatalicious! 183 00:08:04,525 --> 00:08:05,693 Scrumpdiddlerific! 184 00:08:05,776 --> 00:08:07,945 BOTH: Fine and dandy like sour candy. 185 00:08:08,029 --> 00:08:09,155 Bar's a whiz with cold drinks 186 00:08:09,238 --> 00:08:10,323 aren't you, Bar? 187 00:08:10,406 --> 00:08:12,033 Don't understand lemonade myself. 188 00:08:12,116 --> 00:08:13,868 Not my forte. 189 00:08:13,951 --> 00:08:15,328 What brings you to Springfield? 190 00:08:15,411 --> 00:08:16,829 Well, George and I 191 00:08:16,913 --> 00:08:18,372 just wanted to be private citizens again... 192 00:08:18,456 --> 00:08:20,750 go where nobody cared about politics. 193 00:08:20,833 --> 00:08:22,210 So we found the town 194 00:08:22,293 --> 00:08:24,337 with the lowest voter turnout in America. 195 00:08:24,420 --> 00:08:27,048 Just happy to be here among good, average people 196 00:08:27,131 --> 00:08:30,009 with no particular hopes or dreams. 197 00:08:30,092 --> 00:08:34,013 But, Mr. President, we're not all good people. 198 00:08:34,096 --> 00:08:36,432 There's one little boy you should watch out for. 199 00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:38,601 He's a bad, bad little boy. 200 00:08:38,684 --> 00:08:39,852 (laughing nervously) 201 00:08:39,936 --> 00:08:41,562 Now, Todd, don't scare the President. 202 00:08:51,072 --> 00:08:52,740 (panting) 203 00:08:56,536 --> 00:08:59,747 Huh... look at those phonies, sucking up to Bush. 204 00:08:59,830 --> 00:09:02,166 (whimpering) 205 00:09:02,250 --> 00:09:03,960 (barking) 206 00:09:04,043 --> 00:09:08,798 I guess you might say he's barking up the wrong Bush. 207 00:09:08,881 --> 00:09:10,800 HOMER'S BRAIN: There it is, Homer. 208 00:09:10,883 --> 00:09:12,593 The cleverest thing you'll ever say and nobody heard it. 209 00:09:12,677 --> 00:09:13,553 D'oh! 210 00:09:15,596 --> 00:09:16,514 Ah! 211 00:09:16,597 --> 00:09:17,890 Just going to relax 212 00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:20,393 with my U.S. News and World whatnot. 213 00:09:20,476 --> 00:09:21,519 Oh, good. 214 00:09:21,602 --> 00:09:24,146 They're roasting the new guy. 215 00:09:24,230 --> 00:09:27,316 (imitating Dennis the Menace) Hello... Mr. Bush! 216 00:09:27,400 --> 00:09:28,734 George... 217 00:09:28,818 --> 00:09:30,820 this is a neighborhood boy, Bart Simpson. 218 00:09:30,903 --> 00:09:32,572 He came over to say hi. 219 00:09:32,655 --> 00:09:33,823 (quietly) Hello. 220 00:09:33,906 --> 00:09:35,533 Hi! Hey, what's this? 221 00:09:35,616 --> 00:09:37,577 My electric card shuffler. Don't go near the-- 222 00:09:39,161 --> 00:09:40,913 Now, I told you. 223 00:09:40,997 --> 00:09:43,249 Oh... those cards were from Air Force One 224 00:09:43,332 --> 00:09:45,543 and they only give you so many packs. 225 00:09:45,626 --> 00:09:47,420 Oh, George, boys will be boys. 226 00:09:47,503 --> 00:09:49,130 Bart's just being friendly. 227 00:09:49,213 --> 00:09:51,882 Why don't you get off that sofa and show Bart your photos? 228 00:09:51,966 --> 00:09:53,551 Oh, he'll gunk them all up. 229 00:09:53,634 --> 00:09:56,345 His hands are probably covered with mud and cookies. 230 00:09:56,429 --> 00:09:58,347 Well... 231 00:09:58,431 --> 00:10:00,933 (muttering) Probably stole a napkin. 232 00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:02,476 Who's that, George? 233 00:10:02,560 --> 00:10:04,103 That's me with Charlton Heston. He was... 234 00:10:04,186 --> 00:10:05,438 Who's that, George? 235 00:10:05,521 --> 00:10:07,148 Now see, you wouldn't know him. 236 00:10:07,231 --> 00:10:09,150 That's Bob Mosbacher, He was Secretary of... 237 00:10:09,233 --> 00:10:11,110 That's a dumb name. Who's that, George? 238 00:10:11,193 --> 00:10:13,362 Maybe he thinks Bart is a dumb name. 239 00:10:13,446 --> 00:10:14,947 How many times were you President, George? 240 00:10:15,031 --> 00:10:16,365 Just once. 241 00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:18,284 Bar, isn't it time for dinner yet? 242 00:10:18,367 --> 00:10:21,120 I'm making rice. It'll be a while. 243 00:10:21,203 --> 00:10:22,288 Did your Secret Service goons 244 00:10:22,371 --> 00:10:23,372 ever whack anybody, George? 245 00:10:23,456 --> 00:10:25,666 You know, in my day, 246 00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:29,170 little boys didn't call their elders by their first names. 247 00:10:29,253 --> 00:10:31,964 Yeah, well, welcome to the 20th century, George. 248 00:10:32,048 --> 00:10:34,884 (muttering) I'll kick you right out of the 20th century, you little... 249 00:10:36,344 --> 00:10:38,054 (tires screeching) 250 00:10:38,137 --> 00:10:39,597 Oh, man! I only got one minute till they stop serving 251 00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:42,058 those breakfast balls. D'oh! 252 00:10:42,141 --> 00:10:43,351 Let's see now. 253 00:10:43,434 --> 00:10:45,311 What do you folks have here, huh? 254 00:10:45,394 --> 00:10:47,396 Hmm, a Krusty Burger. 255 00:10:47,480 --> 00:10:48,939 That doesn't sound too appetizing. 256 00:10:49,023 --> 00:10:50,608 What kind of stew do you have today? 257 00:10:50,691 --> 00:10:52,902 Uh, we don't have stew. 258 00:10:52,985 --> 00:10:54,362 (honking) 259 00:10:54,445 --> 00:10:56,322 Sir, why don't you just have the cheeseburger? 260 00:10:56,405 --> 00:10:58,991 Oh, that's really more of a weekend thing, Ray. 261 00:10:59,075 --> 00:11:01,494 Hey, jerk! Move your fanny! 262 00:11:01,577 --> 00:11:03,204 That guy is louder than World War II. 263 00:11:03,287 --> 00:11:05,331 Ray, go see what the rhubarb is, will you? 264 00:11:05,414 --> 00:11:07,166 (honking) 265 00:11:07,249 --> 00:11:09,543 Sir, could you pop your hood? 266 00:11:09,627 --> 00:11:12,004 (horn braying) 267 00:11:12,088 --> 00:11:14,507 Hey! My taxes paid for that horn. 268 00:11:15,633 --> 00:11:16,550 Why, hello, Mrs. Bush. 269 00:11:16,634 --> 00:11:17,760 Hi, Bart. 270 00:11:17,843 --> 00:11:19,970 Mr. Bush is upstairs napping. 271 00:11:20,054 --> 00:11:21,722 You know, your husband's awful grumpy. 272 00:11:21,806 --> 00:11:23,641 Oh, that's just his way. 273 00:11:23,724 --> 00:11:25,267 He really likes you. 274 00:11:25,351 --> 00:11:26,769 You know, it's time for him to get up 275 00:11:26,852 --> 00:11:28,270 and work on his memoirs. 276 00:11:28,354 --> 00:11:29,814 Why don't you go wake him? 277 00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:32,149 (horn sounding) 278 00:11:32,233 --> 00:11:33,317 What? What the-- 279 00:11:33,401 --> 00:11:34,860 Great Scott, don't touch that. 280 00:11:34,944 --> 00:11:37,988 That's the alpenhorn Helmut Kohl gave me. 281 00:11:38,072 --> 00:11:39,365 Where'd you get those pajamas? 282 00:11:39,448 --> 00:11:41,117 They're presidential pajamas. 283 00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:43,619 You have to be president, and you're not president. 284 00:11:43,703 --> 00:11:44,620 Yes, I am. 285 00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:46,622 No, you're not! Bar! 286 00:11:50,751 --> 00:11:52,169 Hey, where's your candy? 287 00:11:52,253 --> 00:11:54,171 We don't have any. Now, go away. 288 00:11:54,255 --> 00:11:56,173 George! 289 00:11:56,257 --> 00:11:58,300 Older people don't eat much candy, Bart 290 00:11:58,384 --> 00:12:01,804 but I could bake you some cookies if you like. 291 00:12:01,887 --> 00:12:04,390 (muttering) Can't remember the last time she made cookies for me. 292 00:12:04,473 --> 00:12:06,058 -What's that? -Oh, nothing. 293 00:12:06,142 --> 00:12:07,268 {\an8}HOMER: All right. 294 00:12:07,351 --> 00:12:09,061 His story checks out. 295 00:12:09,145 --> 00:12:12,398 Marge, would you love me more if I were President? 296 00:12:12,481 --> 00:12:14,108 'Cause I'll do it if it'll make you happy. 297 00:12:14,191 --> 00:12:15,401 Homie, as long as you keep 298 00:12:15,484 --> 00:12:18,279 the car full of gas, I'm happy. 299 00:12:18,362 --> 00:12:21,824 Well, she can always depend on that. 300 00:12:24,785 --> 00:12:26,704 -(typing) -And since I'd achieved 301 00:12:26,787 --> 00:12:31,041 all my goals as President in one term 302 00:12:31,125 --> 00:12:33,753 there was no need for a second. 303 00:12:38,382 --> 00:12:40,843 Hmm... good memoirs. 304 00:12:40,926 --> 00:12:42,303 Good, not great. 305 00:12:42,386 --> 00:12:44,054 Now, let's look at that old outboard. 306 00:12:44,138 --> 00:12:46,223 Soup that baby up, rattle a few windows 307 00:12:46,307 --> 00:12:48,309 down in Kennebunkport next May. 308 00:12:49,435 --> 00:12:51,729 Hello... Mr. Bush! 309 00:12:55,399 --> 00:12:56,442 What you doing? 310 00:12:56,525 --> 00:12:58,486 Don't upset the desk there. 311 00:12:58,569 --> 00:12:59,737 Careful! Don't want to horse around with... 312 00:12:59,820 --> 00:13:01,238 Hey, cool! What does this do? 313 00:13:01,322 --> 00:13:03,032 Now don't you pull that cord, young man! 314 00:13:03,115 --> 00:13:04,533 (engine revving) 315 00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:06,118 GEORGE: Now look what you did. Whoops! Hey! 316 00:13:06,202 --> 00:13:08,621 Bar, my motor's gone loco! 317 00:13:08,704 --> 00:13:10,831 Oh! The birdhouse. 318 00:13:10,915 --> 00:13:12,625 My prize orchids! 319 00:13:23,385 --> 00:13:25,304 Oh, no! Not the memoirs. 320 00:13:25,387 --> 00:13:26,305 Don't even think about it. 321 00:13:26,388 --> 00:13:27,306 Not gonna happen. 322 00:13:32,937 --> 00:13:35,022 (groans) 323 00:13:35,105 --> 00:13:37,316 (engine stops) 324 00:13:37,399 --> 00:13:38,317 Whoa, man. 325 00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:39,777 Whoa, nothing. 326 00:13:39,860 --> 00:13:41,278 I'm going to do something 327 00:13:41,362 --> 00:13:44,365 your Daddy should have done a long time ago. 328 00:13:47,660 --> 00:13:49,703 Now go home and think about what you've done, young man. 329 00:13:52,873 --> 00:13:55,000 He spanked you? 330 00:13:55,084 --> 00:13:56,794 You? Bart Simpson? 331 00:13:56,877 --> 00:13:58,337 I begged him to stop 332 00:13:58,420 --> 00:14:00,422 but he said it was for the good of the nation. 333 00:14:00,506 --> 00:14:01,966 Big deal. 334 00:14:02,049 --> 00:14:03,509 When I was a pup, we got spanked by Presidents 335 00:14:03,592 --> 00:14:05,177 till the cows came home. 336 00:14:05,261 --> 00:14:06,679 Grover Cleveland spanked me 337 00:14:06,762 --> 00:14:08,973 on two non-consecutive occasions. 338 00:14:09,056 --> 00:14:12,518 Grampa, I know in your day, spanking was common 339 00:14:12,601 --> 00:14:14,144 but Homer and I just don't believe 340 00:14:14,228 --> 00:14:15,855 in that kind of punishment. 341 00:14:15,938 --> 00:14:18,524 And that's why your no-good kids are running wild! 342 00:14:19,984 --> 00:14:21,443 First, Bush invades my home turf, 343 00:14:21,527 --> 00:14:23,028 then he takes my pals, 344 00:14:23,112 --> 00:14:25,865 then he makes fun of the way I talk... probably. 345 00:14:25,948 --> 00:14:27,575 Now he steals my right 346 00:14:27,658 --> 00:14:30,411 to raise a disobedient, smart-alecky son! 347 00:14:30,494 --> 00:14:32,413 Well, that's it! 348 00:14:34,206 --> 00:14:35,583 Hey, Bush! 349 00:14:35,666 --> 00:14:37,376 Get out here! 350 00:14:37,459 --> 00:14:40,129 Excuse me, sir. Where are you going? 351 00:14:40,212 --> 00:14:42,381 I'm going to punch George Bush in the face. 352 00:14:42,464 --> 00:14:44,550 Okay. Is he expecting you? 353 00:14:44,633 --> 00:14:45,926 You owe me an apology. 354 00:14:46,010 --> 00:14:47,845 Hey, you owe me an apology. 355 00:14:47,928 --> 00:14:49,597 If you were any kind of a father 356 00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:52,641 you'd have disciplined that boy a long time ago. 357 00:14:52,725 --> 00:14:54,393 You want to step back, sir? 358 00:14:54,476 --> 00:14:56,604 -You're trampling the flowers. -Ooh! 359 00:14:56,687 --> 00:14:59,523 Hiding behind your goons, eh, Bush? 360 00:14:59,607 --> 00:15:00,566 Oh! 361 00:15:00,649 --> 00:15:03,861 Well, you are a wimp! 362 00:15:05,613 --> 00:15:07,114 Wimp... am I? 363 00:15:07,197 --> 00:15:08,449 Agent Johnson? 364 00:15:08,532 --> 00:15:10,034 Agent Heintz? 365 00:15:10,117 --> 00:15:11,410 You men, stand down. 366 00:15:15,998 --> 00:15:17,541 All right, mister. 367 00:15:17,625 --> 00:15:19,460 You want trouble, you're going to get trouble. 368 00:15:19,543 --> 00:15:21,545 Oh, I want trouble, all right. 369 00:15:21,629 --> 00:15:22,796 Then you're going to get trouble. 370 00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:24,590 No, you're going to get trouble. 371 00:15:24,673 --> 00:15:27,217 Oh, that's good, that's good 'cause I want trouble. 372 00:15:27,301 --> 00:15:28,218 Then we're agreed 373 00:15:28,302 --> 00:15:29,637 there'll be trouble. 374 00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:31,639 Oh, yeah, lots of trouble. 375 00:15:31,722 --> 00:15:33,641 -Trouble, it is. -For you. 376 00:15:33,724 --> 00:15:35,184 -For... D'oh! -(door slams) 377 00:15:37,353 --> 00:15:39,813 (chuckles) This is gonna be sweet. 378 00:15:39,897 --> 00:15:42,399 200 bottle rockets, and George Bush 379 00:15:42,483 --> 00:15:44,485 doing toe-touches by an open window. 380 00:15:44,568 --> 00:15:45,486 BART: If you get one up his butt, 381 00:15:45,569 --> 00:15:46,487 it's a million points. 382 00:15:46,570 --> 00:15:49,156 (sizzling) 383 00:15:49,239 --> 00:15:50,199 (whistling) 384 00:15:50,282 --> 00:15:51,533 (booming) 385 00:15:53,744 --> 00:15:55,537 BARBARA: Why don't you just 386 00:15:55,621 --> 00:15:57,289 say you're sorry, George? 387 00:15:57,373 --> 00:15:58,290 Because I'm right. 388 00:15:58,374 --> 00:15:59,833 Oh, no. 389 00:15:59,917 --> 00:16:01,877 I'm going to fix their wagon good. 390 00:16:01,961 --> 00:16:03,796 I've pulled some pranks in my time. 391 00:16:03,879 --> 00:16:06,048 (rattling) 392 00:16:06,131 --> 00:16:08,509 {\an8}DR. HIBBERT: Uh, I don't understand. 393 00:16:08,592 --> 00:16:10,678 Are you saying you and Barbara are bad neighbors? 394 00:16:10,761 --> 00:16:13,597 No, that's not Bar and me, it's them. 395 00:16:13,681 --> 00:16:15,057 Who? Maude and me? 396 00:16:15,140 --> 00:16:16,642 No, the man and his boy. 397 00:16:16,725 --> 00:16:19,603 You know, the... the boy is named Bart. 398 00:16:19,687 --> 00:16:20,980 I don't know the name of the man. 399 00:16:21,063 --> 00:16:22,815 Bar, what's the name of the man? 400 00:16:22,898 --> 00:16:24,441 I'm not getting involved, George. 401 00:16:24,525 --> 00:16:25,442 Look, just never mind. 402 00:16:25,526 --> 00:16:26,735 I thought the banner 403 00:16:26,819 --> 00:16:28,278 was pretty straightforward 404 00:16:28,362 --> 00:16:29,863 but... guess I'll just take it down. 405 00:16:29,947 --> 00:16:31,699 BARBARA: George... 406 00:16:31,782 --> 00:16:33,117 it's time to get dressed. 407 00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:34,952 Nuh-uh. I'm not going outside today, 408 00:16:35,035 --> 00:16:36,620 not with those neighbors. 409 00:16:36,704 --> 00:16:39,456 Staying right here till my speech to the Elks Club. 410 00:16:39,540 --> 00:16:40,457 (knocking) 411 00:16:40,541 --> 00:16:41,834 HOMER: Yoo-hoo. 412 00:16:44,044 --> 00:16:45,879 Who is it? 413 00:16:45,963 --> 00:16:48,340 HOMER: It's your sons, George Bush, Jr. and Jeb Bush. 414 00:16:48,424 --> 00:16:49,800 Come outside, Dad. 415 00:16:49,883 --> 00:16:51,218 Oh, good. 416 00:16:51,301 --> 00:16:52,386 Bar, the boys are out in the front yard. 417 00:16:52,469 --> 00:16:53,804 They'll help me think of a plan 418 00:16:53,887 --> 00:16:55,180 to get those Simpsons. 419 00:16:55,264 --> 00:16:57,224 Oh, George, is that all you ever think about? 420 00:16:57,307 --> 00:16:59,977 The boys probably just want a letter of recommendation. 421 00:17:03,313 --> 00:17:04,857 Boys? Where you going? 422 00:17:04,940 --> 00:17:06,316 Okay, son, give him the glue. 423 00:17:08,360 --> 00:17:09,653 (Homer grunting) 424 00:17:09,737 --> 00:17:12,114 (Homer and Bart laughing) 425 00:17:12,197 --> 00:17:14,116 HOMER: Hey, looking good! 426 00:17:16,410 --> 00:17:18,370 GEORGE: And that's why I will continue 427 00:17:18,454 --> 00:17:22,958 to oppose teen alcoholism in all its forms. 428 00:17:26,670 --> 00:17:28,839 Now, are there any questions? 429 00:17:28,922 --> 00:17:33,510 Keeping in mind that I already explained about my hair. 430 00:17:33,594 --> 00:17:35,554 (mumbling) Oh, yeah, that's right. 431 00:17:37,389 --> 00:17:39,016 (engine revving) 432 00:17:40,476 --> 00:17:42,394 (tires squealing) 433 00:17:42,478 --> 00:17:44,438 (mud splattering) 434 00:17:44,521 --> 00:17:47,316 President Bush is driving on our lawn. 435 00:17:47,399 --> 00:17:48,525 He must be lost. 436 00:17:48,609 --> 00:17:50,360 He's not lost. 437 00:17:50,444 --> 00:17:51,737 Looks like we're experiencing 438 00:17:51,820 --> 00:17:53,280 some blow-back from the wig offensive. 439 00:17:53,363 --> 00:17:54,948 It's time to hit him where he lives. 440 00:17:55,032 --> 00:17:55,949 His house? 441 00:17:56,033 --> 00:17:57,034 Bingo. 442 00:18:01,580 --> 00:18:03,082 So I thought to myself 443 00:18:03,165 --> 00:18:05,042 'what would God do in this situation?' 444 00:18:05,125 --> 00:18:06,043 {\an8}(buzzing) 445 00:18:06,126 --> 00:18:07,419 {\an8}(snickering) Locusts... 446 00:18:07,503 --> 00:18:08,796 {\an8}They'll drive him nuts. 447 00:18:08,879 --> 00:18:10,422 It's all in the Bible, son. 448 00:18:10,506 --> 00:18:12,508 {\an8}It's the prankster's Bible. 449 00:18:12,591 --> 00:18:14,218 (engine revving) 450 00:18:20,557 --> 00:18:25,312 Hmm. Can't decide if this'll be considered feisty or crazy. 451 00:18:25,395 --> 00:18:26,438 Hey! Hey, what the..? 452 00:18:28,315 --> 00:18:31,110 Ohh, if he thinks George Bush will stay out of the sewer 453 00:18:31,193 --> 00:18:33,153 he doesn't know George Bush. 454 00:18:34,863 --> 00:18:37,366 Hey, turkeys, behind you. 455 00:18:37,449 --> 00:18:40,410 For the last time, Bush, apologize for spanking my boy. 456 00:18:40,494 --> 00:18:41,995 Never. 457 00:18:42,079 --> 00:18:44,164 You make him apologize for destroying my memoirs. 458 00:18:44,248 --> 00:18:47,334 You didn't tell me you destroyed his memoirs. 459 00:18:47,417 --> 00:18:48,627 Never! 460 00:19:00,013 --> 00:19:01,431 Yay, Dad! 461 00:19:01,515 --> 00:19:04,309 I really feel awful about your lawn, Marge. 462 00:19:04,393 --> 00:19:05,519 George can be so stubborn 463 00:19:05,602 --> 00:19:07,104 when he thinks he's right. 464 00:19:07,187 --> 00:19:09,648 Well, Homer too. They're so much alike. 465 00:19:09,731 --> 00:19:11,775 Too bad they got off on the wrong foot. 466 00:19:11,859 --> 00:19:14,361 It's just like the Noriega thing. 467 00:19:14,444 --> 00:19:17,573 Now, he and George are the best of friends. 468 00:19:17,656 --> 00:19:20,576 (both panting) 469 00:19:20,659 --> 00:19:23,912 Here's a little something we learned in C.I.A. 470 00:19:26,415 --> 00:19:27,374 (buzzing) 471 00:19:27,457 --> 00:19:28,417 Get him, boys. 472 00:19:28,500 --> 00:19:30,377 (buzzing) 473 00:19:37,092 --> 00:19:38,218 (doorbell ringing) 474 00:19:38,302 --> 00:19:40,345 Hello? 475 00:19:40,429 --> 00:19:41,388 Hello? 476 00:19:42,890 --> 00:19:44,349 (buzzing) 477 00:19:50,731 --> 00:19:53,567 I'll ruin you like a Japanese banquet. 478 00:19:53,650 --> 00:19:55,736 I'll take your head, and... 479 00:19:55,819 --> 00:19:56,820 Gorbachev. 480 00:19:56,904 --> 00:19:57,988 (nervous chuckling) 481 00:19:58,071 --> 00:19:59,823 What are you doing here? 482 00:19:59,907 --> 00:20:02,618 I just dropped by with present for warming of house. 483 00:20:02,701 --> 00:20:05,746 Instead, find you grappling with local oaf. 484 00:20:05,829 --> 00:20:07,789 Oh, brought some of your commie friends 485 00:20:07,873 --> 00:20:09,541 to help you fight dirty, eh? 486 00:20:09,625 --> 00:20:12,252 But, Mikhail, he put a wig on my head, 487 00:20:12,336 --> 00:20:13,253 my memoirs... 488 00:20:13,337 --> 00:20:14,254 BARBARA: George... 489 00:20:14,338 --> 00:20:15,547 this is the last straw. 490 00:20:15,631 --> 00:20:17,758 You apologize to Homer right now. 491 00:20:17,841 --> 00:20:20,177 But, Bar, we can't show any weakness 492 00:20:20,260 --> 00:20:21,595 in front of the Russians. 493 00:20:21,678 --> 00:20:23,847 George. 494 00:20:27,601 --> 00:20:28,852 Yes, dear. 495 00:20:28,936 --> 00:20:31,438 (speaking Russian) 496 00:20:31,521 --> 00:20:32,940 (laughing) 497 00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:35,609 Okay. 498 00:20:35,692 --> 00:20:38,320 I'm sorry I spanked your boy, Homer. 499 00:20:38,403 --> 00:20:39,446 Woo hoo! 500 00:20:39,529 --> 00:20:41,240 In your face, Bush! 501 00:20:41,323 --> 00:20:42,741 Now, apologize for the tax hike. 502 00:20:49,122 --> 00:20:50,874 It's a shame it didn't work out, Marge 503 00:20:50,958 --> 00:20:53,585 but George just felt this neighborhood 504 00:20:53,669 --> 00:20:54,836 brought out the worst in him, and... 505 00:20:54,920 --> 00:20:56,463 (honking) 506 00:20:56,546 --> 00:20:57,798 (honking) 507 00:20:59,925 --> 00:21:00,842 Oh, my. 508 00:21:00,926 --> 00:21:02,386 Well, so long. 509 00:21:07,641 --> 00:21:08,767 Bye-bye. 510 00:21:19,778 --> 00:21:20,654 Hi. 511 00:21:22,030 --> 00:21:24,533 Pleased to meet you. I just moved in. 512 00:21:24,616 --> 00:21:26,868 My name is Jerry Ford. 513 00:21:26,952 --> 00:21:27,911 (gasping) 514 00:21:27,995 --> 00:21:29,663 Former President Gerald Ford? 515 00:21:29,746 --> 00:21:31,873 Put her there. I'm Homer Simpson. 516 00:21:31,957 --> 00:21:35,043 Say, Homer, do you like football? 517 00:21:35,127 --> 00:21:36,586 Do I ever? 518 00:21:36,670 --> 00:21:38,547 Do you like nachos? 519 00:21:38,630 --> 00:21:40,257 Yes, Mr. Ford. 520 00:21:40,340 --> 00:21:41,258 Well... 521 00:21:41,341 --> 00:21:42,592 why don't you come over 522 00:21:42,676 --> 00:21:45,554 and watch the game and we'll have nachos 523 00:21:45,637 --> 00:21:47,597 and then, some beer. 524 00:21:47,681 --> 00:21:49,474 Oohh.. 525 00:21:49,558 --> 00:21:50,976 Jerry, I think you and I 526 00:21:51,059 --> 00:21:53,145 are going to get along just... 527 00:21:53,228 --> 00:21:54,104 -D'oh! -D'oh! 528 00:22:01,153 --> 00:22:03,280 ♪♪ 529 00:22:41,526 --> 00:22:42,819 Shh. 530 00:22:45,947 --> 00:22:49,159 {\an8}CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.