1
00:00:03,086 --> 00:00:06,297
{\an8}<i>♪ The Simpsons ♪</i>

2
00:00:06,381 --> 00:00:07,298
(tires screech)

3
00:00:09,384 --> 00:00:10,802
D'oh!

4
00:00:10,885 --> 00:00:12,387
-Aah!
-(tires screech)

5
00:00:27,777 --> 00:00:30,196
{\an8}Hey, Bart,
summer's almost here.

6
00:00:30,280 --> 00:00:32,240
{\an8}Which kind of sprinkler
do you like?

7
00:00:32,323 --> 00:00:34,200
{\an8}The one that goes
like this?

8
00:00:34,284 --> 00:00:35,910
{\an8}Sss...
fff...

9
00:00:35,994 --> 00:00:37,871
{\an8}sss...
fff...

10
00:00:37,954 --> 00:00:38,997
{\an8}Or the one that goes like this?

11
00:00:39,080 --> 00:00:42,876
{\an8}Fft-fft-fft-fft-fft-fft.

12
00:00:42,959 --> 00:00:44,210
{\an8}Oh, and there's this one.

13
00:00:44,294 --> 00:00:47,422
{\an8}Fff-fff-fff-fff-fff-fff.

14
00:00:47,505 --> 00:00:49,549
{\an8}It's the last day
of school, Milhouse.

15
00:00:49,632 --> 00:00:51,676
{\an8}Try to show
some dignity.

16
00:00:53,595 --> 00:00:55,680
{\an8}(truck engines rev)

17
00:00:56,973 --> 00:00:59,225
{\an8}Gentlemen, start your chimes.

18
00:00:59,309 --> 00:01:00,977
{\an8}(chimes ringing)

19
00:01:06,274 --> 00:01:09,069
{\an8}School's out!
Up yours, Krabappel.

20
00:01:12,781 --> 00:01:15,450
{\an8}Well, I'm glad the rest of you
remembered that summer vacation

21
00:01:15,533 --> 00:01:19,079
{\an8}starts at the end of
the day, not the beginning.

22
00:01:19,162 --> 00:01:20,663
{\an8}Here you go, Ma'am.

23
00:01:20,747 --> 00:01:22,248
{\an8}Hmm, quick work.

24
00:01:22,332 --> 00:01:23,917
{\an8}How did you know
he was going to run?

25
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:26,669
{\an8}We've got someone
on the inside.

26
00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:28,463
{\an8}(nervous laughter)

27
00:01:33,301 --> 00:01:38,264
{\an8}Ah, the reward for a year's
worth of toil and sacrifice.

28
00:01:38,348 --> 00:01:40,183
{\an8}Retrospecticus.

29
00:01:40,266 --> 00:01:41,976
{\an8}Ugh...

30
00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:46,231
{\an8}-Ooh.
-Aah.

31
00:01:46,314 --> 00:01:49,776
{\an8}The leatheroleum covers
were worth the extra money.

32
00:01:49,859 --> 00:01:52,153
{\an8}Oh... you can
smell the benzene.

33
00:01:52,237 --> 00:01:55,031
{\an8}Oh, when the kids see
these layouts and fonts,

34
00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:58,243
{\an8}you're going to be the most popular
girl in school.

35
00:01:58,326 --> 00:01:59,911
You know something, Beezee?

36
00:01:59,994 --> 00:02:02,038
I think you're right.

37
00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:06,209
And so, as Abraham Lincoln sat
in Ford's Theater that night,

38
00:02:06,292 --> 00:02:09,170
John Wilkes Booth entered,
drew his gun and...

39
00:02:09,254 --> 00:02:10,630
(bell ringing)

40
00:02:10,713 --> 00:02:13,258
Well, that's it. Have a
nice summer, everyone.

41
00:02:13,341 --> 00:02:16,010
But what happened
in Ford's Theater?

42
00:02:16,094 --> 00:02:18,096
Was President Lincoln okay?

43
00:02:18,179 --> 00:02:19,973
He was fine.

44
00:02:23,101 --> 00:02:24,435
Go home, Ralph.

45
00:02:24,519 --> 00:02:26,187
In the beginning
of the school year,

46
00:02:26,271 --> 00:02:28,481
each of you received
a colored ticket.

47
00:02:28,565 --> 00:02:30,483
I hope everyone
still has theirs.

48
00:02:30,567 --> 00:02:32,110
-No.
-No.

49
00:02:32,193 --> 00:02:34,195
Who died and
made you boss?

50
00:02:34,279 --> 00:02:36,739
Mr. Estes,
the publications advisor.

51
00:02:36,823 --> 00:02:38,741
I edited the whole thing.

52
00:02:38,825 --> 00:02:41,494
If you hadn't done it,
some other loser would have.

53
00:02:41,578 --> 00:02:43,121
So quit milking it.

54
00:02:44,956 --> 00:02:45,874
(cheering)

55
00:02:51,462 --> 00:02:52,922
Hey, will you guys
sign my yearbook?

56
00:03:04,100 --> 00:03:05,643
(sighs)

57
00:03:12,650 --> 00:03:13,776
This is Becky.

58
00:03:13,860 --> 00:03:15,403
She's in
the second grade.

59
00:03:15,486 --> 00:03:18,072
Hi, Becky.
Thanks for coming out.

60
00:03:20,366 --> 00:03:21,701
"See ya."

61
00:03:21,784 --> 00:03:24,162
He writes the way
people talk.

62
00:03:25,830 --> 00:03:28,041
Your daughter
is named Seymour?

63
00:03:28,124 --> 00:03:31,336
Well, I... ye...

64
00:03:31,419 --> 00:03:33,504
I lied. It's for me.

65
00:03:35,048 --> 00:03:37,133
I don't get it.
Straight A's,

66
00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:39,385
perfect attendance,
bathroom timer.

67
00:03:39,469 --> 00:03:42,639
I should be the most
popular girl in school.

68
00:03:43,306 --> 00:03:45,099
(sighs)

69
00:03:45,183 --> 00:03:48,353
Homer, I'm in a rhubarb
of a pickle of a jam here.

70
00:03:48,436 --> 00:03:50,271
I was all set to go off
on vacation

71
00:03:50,355 --> 00:03:52,273
when I get called up
for jury duty.

72
00:03:52,357 --> 00:03:54,108
It's a corker of a case.

73
00:03:54,192 --> 00:03:56,736
Seems a man drove up
onto a traffic island

74
00:03:56,819 --> 00:03:59,113
and hit a decorative rowboat
full of geraniums.

75
00:03:59,197 --> 00:04:01,699
Now they're trying it
as a maritime offense...

76
00:04:01,783 --> 00:04:05,245
So, anyhoo, how'd you like
to use my beach house?

77
00:04:05,328 --> 00:04:06,496
Free of charge.

78
00:04:06,579 --> 00:04:09,249
I only get two weeks
of vacation a year,

79
00:04:09,332 --> 00:04:12,627
and you want me to spend it
in your lousy beach house?

80
00:04:12,710 --> 00:04:15,630
Well... if it will
seal the deal,

81
00:04:15,713 --> 00:04:17,840
I'll take a look
at your septic tank,

82
00:04:17,924 --> 00:04:19,509
see if I can get her
humming again?

83
00:04:19,592 --> 00:04:22,011
Deal. See Flanders? You give
a little, you get a little.

84
00:04:22,095 --> 00:04:24,639
(squishing)

85
00:04:24,722 --> 00:04:27,183
Hello, Mr. Brown Ground.
What you got for me?

86
00:04:27,267 --> 00:04:30,395
MARGE: And you're sure the
Flanderses won't be there?

87
00:04:30,478 --> 00:04:32,772
Well, it sounds great.

88
00:04:32,855 --> 00:04:34,732
Bart, you can
invite Milhouse.

89
00:04:34,816 --> 00:04:37,318
Lisa, you can
bring a friend, too.

90
00:04:37,402 --> 00:04:39,779
Hey, great, a friend...

91
00:04:39,862 --> 00:04:43,157
or a companion...

92
00:04:43,241 --> 00:04:44,951
or, I don't know,
a stuffed animal.

93
00:04:47,328 --> 00:04:49,247
Well, did you call
one of your friends?

94
00:04:49,330 --> 00:04:50,581
Friends? Ha.

95
00:04:50,665 --> 00:04:52,125
These are
my only friends.

96
00:04:52,208 --> 00:04:54,961
Grown-up nerds
like Gore Vidal.

97
00:04:55,044 --> 00:04:57,588
And even he's kissed
more boys than I ever will.

98
00:04:57,672 --> 00:04:58,840
Girls, Lisa.

99
00:04:58,923 --> 00:05:00,967
Boys kiss girls.

100
00:05:01,050 --> 00:05:03,594
Mom, why don't I have
any friends?

101
00:05:03,678 --> 00:05:05,013
We have each other.

102
00:05:05,096 --> 00:05:06,431
When I was
a lonely little girl,

103
00:05:06,514 --> 00:05:07,890
I always dreamed
that someday

104
00:05:07,974 --> 00:05:11,644
my daughter would be
my best friend.

105
00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:13,521
We are best friends, Mom.

106
00:05:13,604 --> 00:05:14,814
But I'm a kid.

107
00:05:14,897 --> 00:05:16,816
I need friends
my own age, too.

108
00:05:16,899 --> 00:05:18,943
Honey, you'll make
plenty of friends.

109
00:05:19,027 --> 00:05:21,404
All you have to do
is be yourself.

110
00:05:23,323 --> 00:05:24,824
Be myself?

111
00:05:24,907 --> 00:05:26,993
I've been myself for eight
years and it hasn't worked.

112
00:05:27,076 --> 00:05:28,995
Look at all these
dorky clothes.

113
00:05:29,078 --> 00:05:30,830
A bathing cap...

114
00:05:30,913 --> 00:05:32,749
nose plugs...

115
00:05:32,832 --> 00:05:34,834
a microscope at the beach?

116
00:05:34,917 --> 00:05:36,919
Ugh, what was I thinking?

117
00:05:42,133 --> 00:05:43,968
Mom, I'm gonna tighten
Milhouse's straps.

118
00:05:44,052 --> 00:05:45,178
He's fidgeting again.

119
00:05:45,261 --> 00:05:46,304
Ow!

120
00:05:46,387 --> 00:05:49,682
-(honking)
-Lisa! Let's go.

121
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:53,227
Hmm...

122
00:05:53,311 --> 00:05:55,063
Somebody's traveling light.

123
00:05:55,146 --> 00:05:57,231
Maybe you're getting stronger.

124
00:05:57,315 --> 00:05:59,859
Well, I have been
eating more.

125
00:06:04,030 --> 00:06:06,199
Wave bye-bye
to our house, Maggie.

126
00:06:06,282 --> 00:06:07,867
Bye-bye, tree.

127
00:06:07,950 --> 00:06:09,243
Bye-bye, job.

128
00:06:09,327 --> 00:06:10,787
Bye-bye, toothbrush.

129
00:06:10,870 --> 00:06:12,997
Bye-bye, Lisa Simpson.

130
00:06:19,921 --> 00:06:22,173
When the hell are we
going to get to...

131
00:06:22,256 --> 00:06:23,257
Where the hell are we going?

132
00:06:23,341 --> 00:06:25,009
(annoyed grunt)

133
00:06:25,093 --> 00:06:28,096
It's called Little
Pwagmattasquarmsettport.

134
00:06:28,179 --> 00:06:30,765
It's known
as America's scrod basket.

135
00:06:30,848 --> 00:06:33,267
I thought Springfield
was America's scrod basket.

136
00:06:33,351 --> 00:06:36,521
No. Springfield
is America's crud bucket.

137
00:06:36,604 --> 00:06:38,898
At least,
according to Newsweek.

138
00:06:49,826 --> 00:06:51,744
"Wel-diddly-elcome,
Simpsons."

139
00:06:51,828 --> 00:06:52,954
Oh, geez.

140
00:06:53,037 --> 00:06:54,539
He actually
wrote "diddly."

141
00:06:54,622 --> 00:06:55,915
That was thoughtful.

142
00:06:55,998 --> 00:06:59,794
"I left a few helpful
notes around our house."

143
00:06:59,877 --> 00:07:01,504
HOMER: Aw, come on-- Gee--

144
00:07:04,048 --> 00:07:05,425
"Put food in me."

145
00:07:05,508 --> 00:07:06,676
I'll take that.

146
00:07:10,430 --> 00:07:12,056
Well, duh!

147
00:07:12,140 --> 00:07:13,349
With what, Ned?

148
00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:14,725
(annoyed groan)

149
00:07:21,607 --> 00:07:23,234
Nice try, Todd.

150
00:07:23,317 --> 00:07:24,902
(chuckles)

151
00:07:24,986 --> 00:07:26,654
Isn't this fun, honey?

152
00:07:26,737 --> 00:07:29,615
It must be exciting
to make a different set of beds.

153
00:07:29,699 --> 00:07:32,285
I know you're
joking, but it is!

154
00:07:32,368 --> 00:07:34,120
Say, why don't you
put on your swimsuit

155
00:07:34,203 --> 00:07:35,496
and head for the beach?

156
00:07:35,580 --> 00:07:37,081
Well, it's kind of funny.

157
00:07:37,165 --> 00:07:39,542
With all the craziness
and confusion

158
00:07:39,625 --> 00:07:42,670
and mishegoss of packing,
I forgot to pack.

159
00:07:42,753 --> 00:07:44,881
Lisa, that's not
at all like you.

160
00:07:44,964 --> 00:07:46,007
Exactly.

161
00:07:46,090 --> 00:07:47,008
Hmm.

162
00:07:47,091 --> 00:07:48,968
I forgot my swimsuit, too

163
00:07:49,051 --> 00:07:51,262
but I improvised.

164
00:07:52,388 --> 00:07:53,598
HOMER:
Hello.

165
00:07:53,681 --> 00:07:55,433
(siren wailing)

166
00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:01,522
{\an8}Uh, Mom, I'm kind
of trying to go

167
00:08:01,606 --> 00:08:03,441
{\an8}for a different
look this year.

168
00:08:03,524 --> 00:08:04,734
Oh, okay.

169
00:08:04,817 --> 00:08:05,860
(gasps)

170
00:08:05,943 --> 00:08:07,028
Ooh!

171
00:08:07,111 --> 00:08:09,906
How about this
adorable sunsuit?

172
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:11,782
It has a starfish
on the fanny

173
00:08:11,866 --> 00:08:13,910
and it comes
with its own pail.

174
00:08:13,993 --> 00:08:16,704
LISA: Mom, come here!
Bring money.

175
00:08:22,084 --> 00:08:24,795
So, where do you want
to show off your new hip togs?

176
00:08:24,879 --> 00:08:27,340
The Sherbet Shoppe?
The Candle District?

177
00:08:27,423 --> 00:08:29,425
Big Sue's Tap Water Taffy?

178
00:08:29,509 --> 00:08:32,136
{\an8}Um, if it's okay
with you, Mom,

179
00:08:32,220 --> 00:08:34,472
{\an8}I'd rather go
find some kids.

180
00:08:34,555 --> 00:08:36,807
Oh.
Okay.

181
00:08:38,559 --> 00:08:40,937
You'll be my friend.

182
00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:43,856
I'm never, never going
to let you get away.

183
00:08:45,858 --> 00:08:47,068
(laughing)

184
00:08:47,151 --> 00:08:49,654
BART: Last one in
is a yearbook editor!

185
00:08:49,737 --> 00:08:52,990
Full speed ahead.
Prepare to dive.

186
00:08:53,074 --> 00:08:54,200
Dive!

187
00:08:54,283 --> 00:08:55,701
(both groan)

188
00:08:57,703 --> 00:08:59,121
It's low tide, boys.

189
00:09:05,586 --> 00:09:07,630
I wonder where
all the kids are.

190
00:09:09,257 --> 00:09:10,466
Hey, a library!

191
00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:12,051
No, I can't.

192
00:09:12,134 --> 00:09:13,803
That's the old nerdy Lisa.

193
00:09:15,680 --> 00:09:18,474
Lisa, read about
my adventures in the south seas

194
00:09:18,558 --> 00:09:21,227
and make me live again.

195
00:09:21,310 --> 00:09:24,939
We've got periodicals
on microfiche.

196
00:09:26,732 --> 00:09:29,151
Won't you join
our tea party?

197
00:09:29,235 --> 00:09:31,195
It would be ever so...

198
00:09:31,279 --> 00:09:33,698
Don't do it, Lisa!
It's a trick. Run!

199
00:09:33,781 --> 00:09:35,032
Run!

200
00:09:37,785 --> 00:09:40,621
Oh, I don't see
any kids at all.

201
00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:42,999
It's like they ditched me
in advance.

202
00:09:43,082 --> 00:09:45,418
BOY:
So, he goes like (snorts).

203
00:09:45,501 --> 00:09:48,504
GIRL: I can totally
hear him going that.

204
00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:51,966
(gasps)
Only kids are that incoherent.

205
00:09:52,967 --> 00:09:54,677
(kids chuckling)

206
00:09:57,680 --> 00:09:59,807
So my Mom tried to take me
to some candle place,

207
00:09:59,890 --> 00:10:01,350
but I'm all, like, "no way."

208
00:10:04,562 --> 00:10:06,522
Like, you know, whatever.

209
00:10:06,606 --> 00:10:08,649
Like, you know,
whatever.

210
00:10:08,733 --> 00:10:10,192
Hey, what's hap...

211
00:10:10,276 --> 00:10:11,611
(screeching)

212
00:10:11,694 --> 00:10:13,279
Okay, okay, okay.

213
00:10:13,362 --> 00:10:15,072
Not your fault.
It's a bird thing.

214
00:10:15,156 --> 00:10:16,574
You don't control the birds.

215
00:10:16,657 --> 00:10:19,577
You will someday, but not now.

216
00:10:19,660 --> 00:10:21,370
-Hi.
-What's up?

217
00:10:21,454 --> 00:10:23,873
-Who's that?
-I don't know. Some kid.

218
00:10:23,956 --> 00:10:25,416
Hey, I like your hat.

219
00:10:25,499 --> 00:10:27,251
A compliment!

220
00:10:27,335 --> 00:10:29,545
<i>Scanning for sarcasm...</i>

221
00:10:29,629 --> 00:10:31,130
<i>It's clean. Go!</i>

222
00:10:32,340 --> 00:10:34,300
Thanks.

223
00:10:34,383 --> 00:10:37,178
Um... you guys skate?

224
00:10:37,261 --> 00:10:40,348
Try to, but cops always
confiscate our boards.

225
00:10:40,431 --> 00:10:42,600
Yeah. And you just know
they're using them

226
00:10:42,683 --> 00:10:45,186
like, five minutes later
down at the station.

227
00:10:45,269 --> 00:10:47,271
Hmm. I think I know
a place you can skate

228
00:10:47,355 --> 00:10:48,648
that's virtually deserted.

229
00:10:51,609 --> 00:10:53,527
Like, you know, whatever.

230
00:10:53,611 --> 00:10:55,821
-Oh, cool.
-All right. Cool.

231
00:11:01,077 --> 00:11:02,328
Hey, this place rocks.

232
00:11:02,411 --> 00:11:03,537
What'd you say
your name was?

233
00:11:03,621 --> 00:11:06,374
-Didn't. It's Lisa.
-I'm Erin.

234
00:11:06,457 --> 00:11:07,416
So how'd you know
about this place?

235
00:11:07,500 --> 00:11:09,377
You into books?

236
00:11:09,460 --> 00:11:11,379
Me? Unlikely.

237
00:11:11,462 --> 00:11:14,006
My goony brother's
always going to libraries.

238
00:11:14,090 --> 00:11:16,133
I usually hang out in front.

239
00:11:16,217 --> 00:11:17,885
Oh, you like hanging out, too?

240
00:11:17,968 --> 00:11:19,970
Well, it beats doing stuff.

241
00:11:20,054 --> 00:11:22,139
Yeah, stuff sucks.

242
00:11:22,223 --> 00:11:24,517
Hey, you up?
You can use my board.

243
00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:25,601
Aah!

244
00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:27,770
Okay. Thanks.

245
00:11:27,853 --> 00:11:29,647
That's very, um...

246
00:11:29,730 --> 00:11:31,190
rad of you.

247
00:11:37,988 --> 00:11:41,117
Hey, Bart, Lisa's skateboarding
with some cool kids.

248
00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:43,869
And she looks like Blossom.

249
00:11:43,953 --> 00:11:47,373
Lisa? With people?
(snorts)

250
00:11:47,456 --> 00:11:48,791
If they're
impressed by her,

251
00:11:48,874 --> 00:11:50,626
I'm going to Bart
their world.

252
00:11:50,710 --> 00:11:52,044
Okay, Milhouse,
you know the drill.

253
00:11:52,128 --> 00:11:54,088
Right. You go over
and wow them.

254
00:11:54,171 --> 00:11:55,923
I hide in the shrubs.

255
00:11:58,968 --> 00:12:00,845
Hot stuff coming through!

256
00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:07,977
My friendship,
you know you want it.

257
00:12:08,060 --> 00:12:10,855
(scoffs) That kid, like,
tries too hard.

258
00:12:10,938 --> 00:12:14,984
Shah. The whole thing
smacks of effort, man.

259
00:12:15,067 --> 00:12:19,488
Pff. That's my dorky little brother,
Bart... tholomew.

260
00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:21,323
(scoffs) Like, who does
he think he is

261
00:12:21,407 --> 00:12:22,533
with that slingshot
in his back pocket?

262
00:12:22,616 --> 00:12:23,826
Dennis the Menace?

263
00:12:23,909 --> 00:12:25,286
-(all laughing)
-Face. What a rip!

264
00:12:25,369 --> 00:12:27,246
Like, Mr. Wilson
or something.

265
00:12:27,329 --> 00:12:30,040
How'd it go?
Are we down with them?

266
00:12:30,124 --> 00:12:32,793
No. They must
have seen you.

267
00:12:33,794 --> 00:12:35,254
(bug zapper zaps)

268
00:12:35,337 --> 00:12:38,090
Oh, why do we have to play
this lousy old game?

269
00:12:38,174 --> 00:12:40,384
Because it was
the only one in the house.

270
00:12:40,468 --> 00:12:43,179
Come on, Homer, open the door
for your mystery date.

271
00:12:44,388 --> 00:12:47,141
Ooh captain of
the football team!

272
00:12:47,224 --> 00:12:49,018
He's a dreamboat.

273
00:12:49,101 --> 00:12:50,394
Don't wait up, Marge.

274
00:12:50,478 --> 00:12:51,937
(chuckles)

275
00:12:52,021 --> 00:12:53,272
Okay, Bart, your turn, your turn.

276
00:12:56,650 --> 00:12:58,694
(Marge laughing)

277
00:12:58,778 --> 00:13:01,697
You got the dud!

278
00:13:01,781 --> 00:13:04,784
Hey, he looks just
like you, Poindexter.

279
00:13:04,867 --> 00:13:06,076
(guffawing)

280
00:13:06,160 --> 00:13:08,120
How come Lisa
doesn't have to play?

281
00:13:08,204 --> 00:13:10,372
Why does she get to hang out
with her friends?

282
00:13:10,456 --> 00:13:12,666
You got friends.
You got the dud right here.

283
00:13:12,750 --> 00:13:14,502
Stand up for yourself,
Poindexter.

284
00:13:21,926 --> 00:13:24,053
Wow, Lisa,
I never appreciated

285
00:13:24,136 --> 00:13:26,138
all this, like,
sea junk before.

286
00:13:26,222 --> 00:13:27,723
Hey, that clam's got legs.

287
00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:28,974
That's a hermit crab.

288
00:13:29,058 --> 00:13:30,684
When she outgrows
her old shell,

289
00:13:30,768 --> 00:13:32,978
she finds a new one
that's a better fit.

290
00:13:33,062 --> 00:13:34,730
Don't be afraid,
little friend.

291
00:13:34,814 --> 00:13:37,191
You'll be the most popular
crab on the beach.

292
00:13:37,274 --> 00:13:41,821
Aww, a gift
from my favorite crustacean.

293
00:13:41,904 --> 00:13:44,990
Um, did you learn that word
from a teacher or something?

294
00:13:45,074 --> 00:13:47,409
No. No...

295
00:13:47,493 --> 00:13:49,161
I heard it
on Baywatch.

296
00:13:49,245 --> 00:13:51,205
(overlapping
affirmations)

297
00:13:51,288 --> 00:13:53,082
Baywatch...
David Hasselhoff, man.

298
00:13:55,835 --> 00:13:59,839
Hmm... I bet this place
sells illegal fireworks.

299
00:13:59,922 --> 00:14:03,759
Just go in and act casual,
like you buy 'em all the time.

300
00:14:05,219 --> 00:14:06,720
Hi.

301
00:14:06,804 --> 00:14:10,975
Um... let me have
one of those porno magazines,

302
00:14:11,058 --> 00:14:12,977
large box of condoms,

303
00:14:13,060 --> 00:14:14,645
a bottle of Old Harper,

304
00:14:14,728 --> 00:14:16,605
couple of those panty shields,

305
00:14:16,689 --> 00:14:18,399
and some illegal fireworks,

306
00:14:18,482 --> 00:14:20,693
and one of those
disposable enemas.

307
00:14:20,776 --> 00:14:22,194
No, make it two.

308
00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:25,406
My apologies, sir,
but the sale of fireworks

309
00:14:25,489 --> 00:14:27,908
is prohibited in this state
and is punishable by...

310
00:14:27,992 --> 00:14:30,035
Follow me.

311
00:14:34,665 --> 00:14:38,127
Any red-blooded,
flag-fearing American

312
00:14:38,210 --> 00:14:40,421
would love the M-320.

313
00:14:40,504 --> 00:14:42,590
Celebrate the independence
of your nation

314
00:14:42,673 --> 00:14:44,842
by blowing up
a small part of it.

315
00:14:44,925 --> 00:14:46,343
All right.

316
00:14:46,427 --> 00:14:47,428
Pretty cool
of your Mom

317
00:14:47,511 --> 00:14:48,554
to let us
hang out here.

318
00:14:48,637 --> 00:14:49,889
Totally. Not
like my Mom.

319
00:14:49,972 --> 00:14:51,223
She'd be
butting in

320
00:14:51,307 --> 00:14:54,476
with Rice Krispie
squares and Tang.

321
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:56,020
My Dad's all stoked

322
00:14:56,103 --> 00:14:58,147
'cause today's
the fourth of July.

323
00:14:58,230 --> 00:15:00,190
He woke me up at dawn
to take a loyalty oath.

324
00:15:00,274 --> 00:15:03,027
Ugh. My Mom's French

325
00:15:03,110 --> 00:15:05,446
so we only celebrate
Bastille Day.

326
00:15:05,529 --> 00:15:07,239
Well, we could do
something fun.

327
00:15:07,323 --> 00:15:09,825
Um, how about
a beach party?

328
00:15:09,909 --> 00:15:10,910
Oh, great idea, Lis.

329
00:15:10,993 --> 00:15:12,369
I know where there's a beach.

330
00:15:12,453 --> 00:15:14,246
I know where we can
get some baguettes.

331
00:15:15,789 --> 00:15:17,708
Gee, I don't know
what you've got planned

332
00:15:17,791 --> 00:15:19,960
for tonight, Homer,
but count me out.

333
00:15:20,044 --> 00:15:22,129
Didn't you buy any meat?

334
00:15:22,212 --> 00:15:23,213
(chuckles)

335
00:15:23,297 --> 00:15:25,382
This baby's sure
to kill something.

336
00:15:25,466 --> 00:15:29,386
Okay, now, everybody, stand back
while I celebrate freedom.

337
00:15:29,470 --> 00:15:30,846
Bart, give me your matches.

338
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:32,640
Fresh out.

339
00:15:32,723 --> 00:15:34,350
No lighter? Nothing?!

340
00:15:36,018 --> 00:15:36,977
Oh!

341
00:15:37,061 --> 00:15:38,395
Wait. I got it.

342
00:15:43,525 --> 00:15:44,401
D'oh!

343
00:15:45,569 --> 00:15:47,237
(gibbering)

344
00:15:51,867 --> 00:15:53,327
(gasps)
The beer!

345
00:15:58,540 --> 00:15:59,500
(sighs)

346
00:16:04,546 --> 00:16:06,423
(whistling)

347
00:16:08,550 --> 00:16:11,720
Oh, this is the worst
fourth of July ever.

348
00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:13,138
I hate America.

349
00:16:13,222 --> 00:16:14,556
Come on, Milhouse.
Let's go down there.

350
00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:16,225
I don't think you should.

351
00:16:16,308 --> 00:16:18,686
Let Lisa be alone
with her new friends.

352
00:16:18,769 --> 00:16:20,771
They're my friends rightfully.

353
00:16:20,854 --> 00:16:22,147
She only got them
by copying me.

354
00:16:22,231 --> 00:16:23,857
Don't have
a cow, man.

355
00:16:23,941 --> 00:16:24,858
(all laughing)

356
00:16:24,942 --> 00:16:26,360
See? That's
my expression.

357
00:16:26,443 --> 00:16:28,320
Oh, you haven't said that
in four years.

358
00:16:28,404 --> 00:16:30,114
Let Lisa have it.

359
00:16:30,197 --> 00:16:32,658
It's the principle.
She's got to learn.

360
00:16:32,741 --> 00:16:35,411
No! Now, park your keister,
Meester.

361
00:16:37,913 --> 00:16:39,581
LISA:
Aye, carumba!

362
00:16:39,665 --> 00:16:40,916
(kids laugh)

363
00:16:42,751 --> 00:16:45,129
Hey, Lis, I made
something for you.

364
00:16:45,212 --> 00:16:46,964
It's a friendship
bracelet.

365
00:16:47,047 --> 00:16:48,632
For me?

366
00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:52,469
Wow, my first real
friend... ship bracelet.

367
00:16:52,553 --> 00:16:53,595
(nervous chuckle)

368
00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:55,764
I don't have
anything for you...

369
00:16:55,848 --> 00:16:57,975
except this necklace I made.

370
00:16:58,058 --> 00:16:59,268
Oh, cool.

371
00:16:59,351 --> 00:17:00,519
Thanks.

372
00:17:00,602 --> 00:17:01,520
(sniffing)

373
00:17:01,603 --> 00:17:03,313
Hey, cinnamon dental floss.

374
00:17:03,397 --> 00:17:07,484
I just know we're going
to be friends forever.

375
00:17:11,113 --> 00:17:13,490
So, Lisa has a friend.

376
00:17:13,574 --> 00:17:15,617
We'll see about that.

377
00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:18,454
Bart!

378
00:17:18,537 --> 00:17:20,664
I need my glasses.

379
00:17:20,748 --> 00:17:23,542
Oh, nice doggie.

380
00:17:28,714 --> 00:17:30,340
(giggling)

381
00:17:35,429 --> 00:17:37,431
<i>I'm dizzy!</i>

382
00:17:37,514 --> 00:17:39,224
<i>I'm nauseous!</i>

383
00:17:39,308 --> 00:17:41,101
<i>But I'm popular!</i>

384
00:17:45,355 --> 00:17:46,899
Huh?

385
00:17:46,982 --> 00:17:48,817
What's he doing here?

386
00:17:48,901 --> 00:17:49,985
My yearbook.

387
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:51,028
No!

388
00:17:52,154 --> 00:17:54,448
Mm-hmm.

389
00:17:54,531 --> 00:17:55,616
Hey, you guys,
you want to see

390
00:17:55,699 --> 00:17:57,367
how cool Lisa Simpson
really is?

391
00:17:58,952 --> 00:18:01,747
Check this out.
"Miss Perfect Attendance."

392
00:18:01,830 --> 00:18:04,249
"Grammar Rodeo--
Head Buckeroo."

393
00:18:04,333 --> 00:18:06,960
"The French table."
Ooh la la.

394
00:18:10,339 --> 00:18:12,132
"Teacher's Pet"?

395
00:18:16,428 --> 00:18:18,305
(sobbing)

396
00:18:21,558 --> 00:18:23,227
(humming)

397
00:18:24,686 --> 00:18:27,064
Hey, Lis.

398
00:18:27,147 --> 00:18:29,149
I guess my little
yearbook stunt

399
00:18:29,233 --> 00:18:30,984
was pretty rough,

400
00:18:31,068 --> 00:18:33,153
but it did
teach you a lesson.

401
00:18:33,237 --> 00:18:35,030
It's important
to be yourself.

402
00:18:36,824 --> 00:18:38,408
(through clenched teeth)
I know exactly who I am.

403
00:18:38,492 --> 00:18:40,035
I am the sister

404
00:18:40,119 --> 00:18:43,288
of a rotten, jealous,
mean little sneak.

405
00:18:43,372 --> 00:18:45,666
You cost me
my only friends.

406
00:18:45,749 --> 00:18:48,335
You've ruined my life.

407
00:18:48,418 --> 00:18:51,588
Hey, kids, there's
a carnival tonight.

408
00:18:51,672 --> 00:18:53,966
Oh, boy, a carnival!

409
00:19:01,932 --> 00:19:03,100
Hmm.

410
00:19:04,351 --> 00:19:05,686
(choking)

411
00:19:05,769 --> 00:19:07,271
Kids, stop that.

412
00:19:07,354 --> 00:19:08,939
Don't make me get the carny.

413
00:19:12,317 --> 00:19:15,696
Hey, Lisa,
make friends with this.

414
00:19:15,779 --> 00:19:16,947
Hey!

415
00:19:18,782 --> 00:19:20,742
MILHOUSE:
Help!

416
00:19:20,826 --> 00:19:22,536
Help!

417
00:19:22,619 --> 00:19:25,789
Remember, kids,
there's no need to bump.

418
00:19:25,873 --> 00:19:27,332
Just enjoy the ride.

419
00:19:29,168 --> 00:19:30,627
(bell rings)

420
00:19:30,711 --> 00:19:32,504
(electrical crackling)

421
00:19:46,268 --> 00:19:48,020
(sighs)

422
00:19:52,065 --> 00:19:53,567
Lisa, wait!

423
00:19:58,572 --> 00:20:00,741
Being myself didn't work.

424
00:20:00,824 --> 00:20:03,285
Being someone else didn't work.

425
00:20:03,368 --> 00:20:06,163
Maybe I just wasn't meant
to have friends.

426
00:20:06,246 --> 00:20:09,041
BOY: Lisa is gonna freak
when she sees this.

427
00:20:09,124 --> 00:20:11,084
ERIN: Well, hurry up.
They'll be back soon.

428
00:20:12,836 --> 00:20:15,255
(gasps) Lisa.

429
00:20:15,339 --> 00:20:17,966
Okay, you found out
I'm an overachieving bookworm.

430
00:20:18,050 --> 00:20:20,385
So whatever mean prank
you're pulling,

431
00:20:20,469 --> 00:20:22,638
just finish it up
and send me a Polaroid.

432
00:20:22,721 --> 00:20:24,181
I'm going to sleep.

433
00:20:24,264 --> 00:20:25,474
BOY:
Wait, Lisa, look.

434
00:20:29,186 --> 00:20:30,062
Hmm?

435
00:20:30,145 --> 00:20:33,565
(Lisa exclaiming)

436
00:20:33,649 --> 00:20:35,234
Cool, huh?

437
00:20:35,317 --> 00:20:37,861
Now you can take the beach with you
wherever you go.

438
00:20:37,945 --> 00:20:40,405
Uh, but don't drive
at night.

439
00:20:40,489 --> 00:20:43,075
Does this mean you still
want to be friends?

440
00:20:43,158 --> 00:20:46,245
Even though I tried to
cover up my nerdish leanings?

441
00:20:46,328 --> 00:20:48,914
Look, we don't care
who you were,

442
00:20:48,997 --> 00:20:51,959
and you can't fake the kind
of good person that you are.

443
00:20:52,042 --> 00:20:55,212
Yeah. You taught us
about cool things like nature

444
00:20:55,295 --> 00:20:57,965
and why we shouldn't
drink sea water.

445
00:20:58,048 --> 00:21:00,300
This is the most thoughtful
thing anybody ever--

446
00:21:00,384 --> 00:21:02,344
HOMER:
Sweet merciful crap!

447
00:21:02,427 --> 00:21:03,971
My car!

448
00:21:04,054 --> 00:21:05,180
(sea gulls shrieking)

449
00:21:06,765 --> 00:21:09,059
Mmm. The polite thing to do

450
00:21:09,142 --> 00:21:10,978
would have been to clean
the shells first.

451
00:21:11,061 --> 00:21:12,938
Shoo. Shoo.

452
00:21:13,021 --> 00:21:15,023
I guess I should
give this back to you.

453
00:21:15,107 --> 00:21:17,317
I showed it to your friends again
before we left.

454
00:21:17,401 --> 00:21:18,360
Bart!

455
00:21:18,443 --> 00:21:19,695
Look inside.

456
00:21:25,534 --> 00:21:28,245
Oh, thanks, Bart.

457
00:21:29,538 --> 00:21:31,164
I signed it, too.

458
00:21:31,248 --> 00:21:32,249
(goofy laughter)

459
00:21:33,250 --> 00:21:35,711
{\an8}Uh-huh.

460
00:21:38,255 --> 00:21:40,007
Well, get a last look

461
00:21:40,090 --> 00:21:42,301
at the beautiful
ocean scenery, kids.

462
00:21:51,268 --> 00:21:56,356
{\an8}<i>♪ Sittin' in my car</i>
<i>outside your house ♪</i>

463
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:58,358
{\an8}<i>♪ Sittin' in my car outside</i>
<i>your house ♪</i>

464
00:21:58,442 --> 00:22:04,990
{\an8}<i>♪ Remember when you spilled</i>
<i>Coke all over your blouse ♪</i>

465
00:22:05,073 --> 00:22:08,910
{\an8}<i>♪ T-shirts, cut-offs,</i>
<i>and a pair of thongs ♪</i>

466
00:22:08,994 --> 00:22:12,706
{\an8}<i>♪ T-shirts, cut-offs, and</i>
<i>a pair of thongs ♪</i>

467
00:22:12,789 --> 00:22:16,918
{\an8}<i>♪ We've been havin' fun</i>
<i>all summer long ♪</i>

468
00:22:29,890 --> 00:22:33,310
{\an8}<i>♪ Won't be long till</i>
<i>summertime is through ♪</i>

469
00:22:33,393 --> 00:22:36,396
{\an8}<i>♪ Summertime is through... ♪</i>

470
00:22:36,480 --> 00:22:39,399
{\an8}<i>♪ Every now and then</i>
<i>we hear our song... ♪</i>

471
00:22:39,483 --> 00:22:41,568
Shh!

472
00:22:44,488 --> 00:22:47,032
{\an8}CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY
ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.