1 00:00:02,919 --> 00:00:06,756 {\an8}♪ The Simpsons ♪ 2 00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:11,136 -(chalk screeches) -(bell rings) 3 00:00:12,804 --> 00:00:14,180 (work whistle blows) 4 00:00:17,475 --> 00:00:20,186 -(sucking) -(register beeping) 5 00:00:28,069 --> 00:00:32,490 (jazzy solo) 6 00:00:32,574 --> 00:00:33,867 (tires screech) 7 00:00:36,077 --> 00:00:37,328 D'oh! 8 00:00:37,412 --> 00:00:39,456 -Aah! -(tires screech) 9 00:00:42,542 --> 00:00:43,460 (cries out) 10 00:00:56,723 --> 00:00:59,601 {\an8}(to tune of "Hooray for Hollywood") ♪ I work for Monty Burns ♪ 11 00:00:59,684 --> 00:01:02,562 {\an8}♪ Muh-muh-muh-muh-muh-muh-muh Monty Burns ♪ 12 00:01:05,356 --> 00:01:08,151 {\an8}Mr. Smithers, may we offer you a ride to work? 13 00:01:08,234 --> 00:01:10,195 {\an8}(chuckling) No, thank you. 14 00:01:10,278 --> 00:01:12,739 {\an8}(humming) 15 00:01:12,822 --> 00:01:14,574 {\an8}We're from Globex Corporation. 16 00:01:14,657 --> 00:01:16,326 {\an8}We'd like to talk to you about 17 00:01:16,409 --> 00:01:18,161 {\an8}an exciting employment opportunity 18 00:01:18,244 --> 00:01:19,454 {\an8}in our nuclear division. 19 00:01:19,537 --> 00:01:21,206 {\an8}Flattered, but spoken for. 20 00:01:21,289 --> 00:01:23,333 {\an8}We're prepared to offer you an impressive salary 21 00:01:23,416 --> 00:01:26,336 {\an8}plus health benefits for you and your life partner. 22 00:01:26,419 --> 00:01:28,379 {\an8}The answer is no. 23 00:01:28,463 --> 00:01:30,340 {\an8}What's wrong with this country? 24 00:01:30,423 --> 00:01:31,925 {\an8}Can't a man walk down the street 25 00:01:32,008 --> 00:01:34,302 {\an8}without being offered a job? 26 00:01:34,385 --> 00:01:36,387 {\an8}(sighs) 27 00:01:36,471 --> 00:01:39,182 {\an8}We'll have to go to the next most senior man at the plant. 28 00:01:39,265 --> 00:01:40,725 {\an8}Oh, here we are. 29 00:01:40,809 --> 00:01:42,185 {\an8}Ten years' experience. 30 00:01:42,268 --> 00:01:43,436 {\an8}His name is... 31 00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:44,896 {\an8}Marge, I got a new job! 32 00:01:44,979 --> 00:01:46,815 {\an8}It's with Globex Corporation. 33 00:01:46,898 --> 00:01:48,775 {\an8}I get more money plus health benefits 34 00:01:48,858 --> 00:01:50,568 {\an8}for me and my life partner. 35 00:01:50,652 --> 00:01:52,445 And, they'll move us and give us a nice house and liv-- 36 00:01:52,529 --> 00:01:55,615 -Move us? -It's in Cypress Creek, upstate somewhere. 37 00:01:55,698 --> 00:01:57,325 You took a new job in a strange town 38 00:01:57,408 --> 00:01:59,202 without discussing it with your family? 39 00:01:59,285 --> 00:02:00,662 Of course not. 40 00:02:00,745 --> 00:02:03,331 I wouldn't do that. Why not? 41 00:02:03,414 --> 00:02:05,250 We have roots here, Homer. 42 00:02:05,333 --> 00:02:06,835 We have friends and family 43 00:02:06,918 --> 00:02:08,670 and library cards. 44 00:02:08,753 --> 00:02:10,296 Bart's lawyer is here. 45 00:02:10,380 --> 00:02:13,216 But Marge, this is a chance for me 46 00:02:13,299 --> 00:02:15,343 to fulfill my lifelong dream. 47 00:02:15,426 --> 00:02:17,220 What lifelong dream? 48 00:02:17,303 --> 00:02:20,306 Promise not to laugh? 49 00:02:20,390 --> 00:02:23,560 I always wanted to own the Dallas Cowboys. 50 00:02:23,643 --> 00:02:25,603 (laughing) 51 00:02:28,189 --> 00:02:29,315 I'm sorry, Dad. 52 00:02:29,399 --> 00:02:31,192 I just find that very cute. 53 00:02:31,276 --> 00:02:33,570 Homer, I don't want to leave Springfield. 54 00:02:33,653 --> 00:02:35,905 I've dug myself into a happy little rut here 55 00:02:35,989 --> 00:02:38,491 and I'm not about to hoist myself out of it. 56 00:02:38,575 --> 00:02:40,243 Just bring the rut with you, honey. 57 00:02:40,326 --> 00:02:41,744 Come on, take a look. 58 00:02:49,127 --> 00:02:51,004 Uh, let's watch something else. 59 00:02:51,087 --> 00:02:53,339 Homer, you're trying to talk us into moving to this place. 60 00:02:53,423 --> 00:02:56,009 Oh, yeah, that's right. Let's watch this. 61 00:02:56,092 --> 00:02:58,261 WOMAN: Look at this place. 62 00:02:58,344 --> 00:03:00,847 Somebody ought to build a town that works. 63 00:03:00,930 --> 00:03:02,098 ANNOUNCER: Somebody did. 64 00:03:12,525 --> 00:03:15,111 It's called Cypress Creek-- 65 00:03:15,195 --> 00:03:17,947 a planned community designed for the workers of the Globex Corporation. 66 00:03:18,031 --> 00:03:21,242 Cypress Creek-- where dreams come true. 67 00:03:21,326 --> 00:03:23,036 ANNOUNCER 2: Your dreams may vary from those 68 00:03:23,119 --> 00:03:25,747 of Globex Corporation, its subsidiaries and shareholders. 69 00:03:25,830 --> 00:03:27,290 Well, what do you think of me 70 00:03:27,373 --> 00:03:29,083 and Cypress Creek now, Marge? 71 00:03:29,167 --> 00:03:32,045 It does seem nicer than Springfield. 72 00:03:32,128 --> 00:03:33,880 Yeah, did you notice how the people weren't shoving 73 00:03:33,963 --> 00:03:35,632 or knocking each other down? 74 00:03:35,715 --> 00:03:37,800 I've never been to a place like that before. 75 00:03:37,884 --> 00:03:38,885 -(cries out) -Me neither. 76 00:03:40,637 --> 00:03:42,931 Well, we could use the extra money, 77 00:03:43,014 --> 00:03:46,184 and this house is falling apart. 78 00:03:46,267 --> 00:03:47,518 All right. 79 00:03:47,602 --> 00:03:48,895 (cheering) 80 00:03:53,733 --> 00:03:55,735 Oh, wow! Windows. (chuckles) 81 00:03:55,818 --> 00:03:58,154 I don't think I can afford this place. 82 00:03:58,238 --> 00:03:59,739 (doorbell chimes) 83 00:03:59,822 --> 00:04:01,741 Hello. I am not interested in buying the house, 84 00:04:01,824 --> 00:04:03,409 but I would like to use your rest room, 85 00:04:03,493 --> 00:04:05,119 flip through your magazines, 86 00:04:05,203 --> 00:04:07,080 rearrange your carefully shelved items, 87 00:04:07,163 --> 00:04:09,916 and handle your food products in an unsanitary manner. 88 00:04:09,999 --> 00:04:12,877 Ha! Now you know how it feels! 89 00:04:12,961 --> 00:04:14,587 Thank you. Come again. 90 00:04:14,671 --> 00:04:17,340 We'll never sell this rotten dump. 91 00:04:18,591 --> 00:04:20,385 A little help here. 92 00:04:20,468 --> 00:04:22,178 Even if we sell the house, 93 00:04:22,262 --> 00:04:25,306 we still don't come close to paying off the mortgage. 94 00:04:26,599 --> 00:04:28,184 -Hey. -Hey. 95 00:04:35,024 --> 00:04:36,818 Uh... Homer, ah... 96 00:04:36,901 --> 00:04:39,904 about those things you borrowed from me over the years, 97 00:04:39,988 --> 00:04:42,240 you know, the TV trays, the power sander, 98 00:04:42,323 --> 00:04:44,742 the downstairs bathtub, 99 00:04:44,826 --> 00:04:47,578 you going to be needing those things in Cypress Creek? 100 00:04:47,662 --> 00:04:50,164 -Yes. -Oh, uh... 101 00:04:50,248 --> 00:04:52,458 Okily dokily... 102 00:04:52,542 --> 00:04:54,210 Okily dokily. 103 00:04:59,465 --> 00:05:01,718 -(tires screech) -Bye-diddly-I. 104 00:05:01,801 --> 00:05:03,678 -So long. -God bless you. 105 00:05:03,761 --> 00:05:05,346 -See ya. -Good-bye. 106 00:05:05,430 --> 00:05:07,682 -Bye-bye, Homer. -Take care. 107 00:05:07,765 --> 00:05:09,267 -Adios. -So long. 108 00:05:09,350 --> 00:05:10,476 Fare thee well. 109 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:11,978 Arr. Bon voyage. 110 00:05:12,061 --> 00:05:13,187 Toodle-oo. 111 00:05:13,271 --> 00:05:14,188 So long. 112 00:05:14,272 --> 00:05:15,315 -Bye-bye. -Ta-ta. 113 00:05:15,398 --> 00:05:17,400 -Bye, everybody. -Bye-bye. 114 00:05:17,483 --> 00:05:19,319 -Sayonara, dudes. -So long. 115 00:05:19,402 --> 00:05:21,612 -ALL: Bye-bye! -Bye-bye, now. 116 00:05:21,696 --> 00:05:23,072 -Bye. -See ya. 117 00:05:23,156 --> 00:05:24,115 -Bye. -Bye-bye. 118 00:05:24,198 --> 00:05:25,658 Ha-ha. 119 00:05:25,742 --> 00:05:27,452 I'm gonna miss Springfield. 120 00:05:27,535 --> 00:05:29,579 This town's been awfully good to us. 121 00:05:29,662 --> 00:05:31,331 No, it hasn't, Dad. 122 00:05:31,414 --> 00:05:32,415 That's why we're leaving. 123 00:05:32,498 --> 00:05:33,458 Oh, yeah. 124 00:05:33,541 --> 00:05:35,752 So long, stinktown! 125 00:05:48,389 --> 00:05:51,768 {\an8}It says here, one of these giant redwood trees 126 00:05:51,851 --> 00:05:54,312 {\an8}can provide enough sawdust to cover 127 00:05:54,395 --> 00:05:56,522 {\an8}an entire day's worth of vomit at Disneyland. 128 00:05:56,606 --> 00:05:58,858 ALL: Ooh. 129 00:05:58,941 --> 00:06:02,987 Ahh. 130 00:06:03,071 --> 00:06:05,990 Ohh. 131 00:06:06,074 --> 00:06:08,326 Ooh. 132 00:06:08,409 --> 00:06:09,911 Here we are: 133 00:06:09,994 --> 00:06:12,830 15201 Maple Systems Road-- 134 00:06:12,914 --> 00:06:15,291 Our new home. 135 00:06:17,794 --> 00:06:19,212 (whistles) 136 00:06:19,295 --> 00:06:21,255 I call this room. 137 00:06:23,299 --> 00:06:24,926 (knocking) 138 00:06:25,009 --> 00:06:26,677 I am here to welcome you 139 00:06:26,761 --> 00:06:29,305 on behalf of the President of the Globex Corporation. 140 00:06:29,389 --> 00:06:31,891 Me. Try the papayas. 141 00:06:31,974 --> 00:06:32,975 They're juicy and full of papayine. 142 00:06:33,059 --> 00:06:34,936 Makes you strong like Popeye. 143 00:06:35,019 --> 00:06:37,021 Popeye, papayine. Popeye, papayine. 144 00:06:37,105 --> 00:06:39,315 See? Same thing. Same... Ah, forget it. 145 00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:40,775 How are you? I'm Hank Scorpio. 146 00:06:40,858 --> 00:06:42,819 Wow, my boss. 147 00:06:42,902 --> 00:06:44,278 Don't call me that word. 148 00:06:44,362 --> 00:06:45,738 I don't like things that elevate me 149 00:06:45,822 --> 00:06:47,407 above the other people. I'm just like you. 150 00:06:47,490 --> 00:06:49,075 Oh, sure, I come later in the day, 151 00:06:49,158 --> 00:06:51,244 I get paid a lot more and I take longer vacations, 152 00:06:51,327 --> 00:06:53,162 but I don't like the word "boss." 153 00:06:53,246 --> 00:06:54,163 -Hey, look at my feet. -Okay. 154 00:06:54,247 --> 00:06:57,542 You like those moccasins? Look in your closet. There's a pair for you. 155 00:06:57,625 --> 00:07:00,378 Don't like them? Then neither do I. Get the hell out of here! 156 00:07:00,461 --> 00:07:01,921 Ha! Ever see a guy say good-bye to a shoe? 157 00:07:02,588 --> 00:07:03,506 Yes, once. 158 00:07:03,589 --> 00:07:07,260 Mr. Scorpio, this house is almost too good for us. 159 00:07:07,343 --> 00:07:09,804 I keep expecting to get the bum's rush. 160 00:07:09,887 --> 00:07:12,056 We don't have bums in our town, Marge, and if we did, they wouldn't rush. 161 00:07:12,140 --> 00:07:13,766 They'd be allowed to go at their own pace. 162 00:07:13,850 --> 00:07:16,477 Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm in the middle of a fun run. 163 00:07:16,561 --> 00:07:18,229 See you at work tomorrow. 164 00:07:18,312 --> 00:07:20,356 Although I don't really like to call it work. 165 00:07:23,568 --> 00:07:24,944 Whoa. 166 00:07:28,156 --> 00:07:31,909 Okay, the oven is cleaning itself. 167 00:07:31,993 --> 00:07:34,745 The Autovac's on dirt patrol. 168 00:07:34,829 --> 00:07:37,248 (beeping, whirring) 169 00:07:37,331 --> 00:07:39,959 And Maggie's enjoying her swing-a-majig. 170 00:07:45,214 --> 00:07:47,675 (whimpering) 171 00:07:47,758 --> 00:07:49,594 I can't believe it. 172 00:07:49,677 --> 00:07:52,930 I've done all my housework, and it's only 9:30. 173 00:07:53,014 --> 00:07:55,141 Well, better go upstairs 174 00:07:55,224 --> 00:07:57,143 and make sure the beds are still made. 175 00:08:03,858 --> 00:08:05,359 You will notice, my new best friend, 176 00:08:05,443 --> 00:08:07,278 that we are pretty casual around here. 177 00:08:07,361 --> 00:08:10,031 Yes, sir. I will notice that. 178 00:08:10,114 --> 00:08:11,324 Very casual, Mr. Scorpion. 179 00:08:11,407 --> 00:08:13,326 Don't call me "Mr. Scorpion." 180 00:08:13,409 --> 00:08:15,119 It's "Mr. Scorpio," but don't call me that, either. 181 00:08:15,203 --> 00:08:17,497 Call me Hank. Say, before we continue our tour, 182 00:08:17,580 --> 00:08:19,832 would you mind hanging my coat up on the wall, please? 183 00:08:19,916 --> 00:08:23,252 Mm-hmm. Um, uh... Let's see, um... 184 00:08:23,336 --> 00:08:25,838 -Well, uh... -(laughing ) 185 00:08:25,922 --> 00:08:27,465 Relax, Homer. 186 00:08:27,548 --> 00:08:29,258 At Globex, we don't believe in walls. 187 00:08:29,342 --> 00:08:31,427 Matter of fact, I didn't even give you my coat. 188 00:08:31,511 --> 00:08:34,555 Hmm? 189 00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:36,015 Wow. 190 00:08:36,098 --> 00:08:37,225 Having a place like this 191 00:08:37,308 --> 00:08:38,726 has always been my dream, Homer. 192 00:08:38,809 --> 00:08:40,144 What's your dream? 193 00:08:40,228 --> 00:08:41,687 Uh, to work for you? 194 00:08:41,771 --> 00:08:43,272 Don't do that. 195 00:08:43,356 --> 00:08:44,649 My butt is for sitting, not for kissing. 196 00:08:44,732 --> 00:08:46,359 Now you tell me the truth. 197 00:08:46,442 --> 00:08:48,152 What's your real dream? Your real dream! 198 00:08:48,236 --> 00:08:52,907 Um, someday, I'd... like to own the Dallas Cowboys. 199 00:08:52,990 --> 00:08:54,951 I bet people laughed at you when you told 'em that dream. 200 00:08:55,034 --> 00:08:56,869 -Yeah. -Homer, don't give up. 201 00:08:56,953 --> 00:09:00,289 They laughed at me the first time I wore jeans with a sport coat. 202 00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:02,875 I was the first wealthy man in America to ever do that. 203 00:09:02,959 --> 00:09:04,669 Now they all do it. 204 00:09:04,752 --> 00:09:06,796 -Did you ever hear of Mike Milken? -Yeah-- No. 205 00:09:06,879 --> 00:09:09,090 -Hi there. -Hey, how you doing? 206 00:09:09,173 --> 00:09:11,676 Now, Homer, these gentlemen here will be your eyes and your ears, 207 00:09:11,759 --> 00:09:13,344 and should the need arise, they'll fill in 208 00:09:13,427 --> 00:09:14,929 for any other part of your body. 209 00:09:15,012 --> 00:09:17,390 Your job will be to manage and motivate them. 210 00:09:17,473 --> 00:09:19,684 Give them the benefit of your years of experience. 211 00:09:19,767 --> 00:09:21,477 Don't worry, that won't take long. 212 00:09:21,561 --> 00:09:23,396 The key to motivation is trust. 213 00:09:23,479 --> 00:09:25,856 Let me show you what I mean. I want you to close your eyes 214 00:09:25,940 --> 00:09:27,567 and fall backwards, and I'll catch you. 215 00:09:27,650 --> 00:09:29,694 That's gonna show you what trust is all about. Ready? 216 00:09:29,777 --> 00:09:32,154 -Alright. -Three, two... 217 00:09:32,238 --> 00:09:33,447 -(phone ringing ) -One second. 218 00:09:33,531 --> 00:09:34,574 -Hello? -D-ohh! 219 00:09:34,657 --> 00:09:35,992 Oh, my God, a guy's on the floor. 220 00:09:36,075 --> 00:09:37,076 That was a phone call. 221 00:09:37,159 --> 00:09:38,411 Don't chalk that up to mistrust, now. 222 00:09:38,494 --> 00:09:40,329 Yes? What happened? 223 00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:42,540 When did that happen? How much of it? 224 00:09:42,623 --> 00:09:44,417 Oh my goodness, I'll be right up. 225 00:09:44,500 --> 00:09:45,793 Homer, I got to go upstairs. There's a problem. 226 00:09:45,876 --> 00:09:47,795 Somebody ate part of my lunch. 227 00:09:47,878 --> 00:09:49,005 I'm gonna leave everything to you. 228 00:09:49,088 --> 00:09:50,298 We're on a tight schedule. 229 00:09:50,381 --> 00:09:51,799 You keep them motivated. 230 00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:57,430 Are you guys working? 231 00:09:57,513 --> 00:09:59,348 Yes, sir, Mr. Simpson. 232 00:09:59,432 --> 00:10:02,435 Could you, um, work any harder than this? 233 00:10:02,518 --> 00:10:04,979 Sure thing, boss. 234 00:10:05,062 --> 00:10:07,315 Hey, call me Homer. 235 00:10:11,652 --> 00:10:13,487 (making armpit noises) 236 00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:19,619 You got a fresh sound. 237 00:10:19,702 --> 00:10:21,912 It will play well at this school. 238 00:10:21,996 --> 00:10:25,333 Hey Bart, do you have a best friend yet? 239 00:10:25,416 --> 00:10:28,628 'Cause I've been looking for someone to boss me around. 240 00:10:28,711 --> 00:10:31,005 Okay, folks, let's do it to it. 241 00:10:31,088 --> 00:10:32,006 (chuckling) 242 00:10:32,089 --> 00:10:33,466 Grammar, that is. 243 00:10:33,549 --> 00:10:35,593 Uh, everybody write down this sentence 244 00:10:35,676 --> 00:10:36,844 and circle the nouns. 245 00:10:39,305 --> 00:10:41,974 Bart, as the newest addition to our menagerie, 246 00:10:42,058 --> 00:10:43,184 you have the honors. 247 00:10:43,267 --> 00:10:46,103 Um... uh... 248 00:10:46,187 --> 00:10:48,356 Well, let's start by reading the sentence. 249 00:10:48,439 --> 00:10:50,775 "Two wintim 250 00:10:50,858 --> 00:10:55,196 amd jawwy wirt... " (trails off) 251 00:10:56,822 --> 00:10:58,449 (armpit noise) 252 00:10:59,659 --> 00:11:03,204 So, you never learned cursive? 253 00:11:03,287 --> 00:11:05,790 Um, well, I know "hell" and "damn" and "bit--" 254 00:11:05,873 --> 00:11:07,541 Cursive handwriting, script. 255 00:11:07,625 --> 00:11:09,752 Do you know the multiplication tables? 256 00:11:09,835 --> 00:11:10,836 Long division? 257 00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:13,589 -I know of them. -Hmm... 258 00:11:13,673 --> 00:11:15,800 You know, Bart, I think you'd profit 259 00:11:15,883 --> 00:11:18,469 from a more remedial environment. 260 00:11:18,552 --> 00:11:21,847 And I'm sure you'll feel right at home in... 261 00:11:21,931 --> 00:11:24,183 the Leg-Up Program. 262 00:11:24,266 --> 00:11:25,768 (gasps) 263 00:11:39,156 --> 00:11:41,242 (groans) 264 00:11:41,325 --> 00:11:43,160 Guess I can't complain. 265 00:11:43,244 --> 00:11:46,288 Everything's perfect here. 266 00:11:51,919 --> 00:11:53,546 (ominous music playing) 267 00:11:55,923 --> 00:11:57,967 So, what are you in for? 268 00:11:58,050 --> 00:12:03,139 I moved here from Canada, and they think I'm slow, eh? 269 00:12:03,222 --> 00:12:04,640 I fell off the jungle gym, 270 00:12:04,724 --> 00:12:07,226 and when I woke up, I was in here. 271 00:12:07,309 --> 00:12:10,438 I start fires. 272 00:12:10,521 --> 00:12:13,274 Okay, now, everyone take out your safety pencil 273 00:12:13,357 --> 00:12:15,109 and a circle of paper. 274 00:12:15,192 --> 00:12:18,487 This week, I hope we can finish our work on the letter "A." 275 00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:20,072 Let me get this straight. 276 00:12:20,156 --> 00:12:22,324 We're behind the rest of our class, 277 00:12:22,408 --> 00:12:25,703 and we're going to catch up to them by going slower than they are? 278 00:12:25,786 --> 00:12:27,079 Cuckoo. 279 00:12:27,163 --> 00:12:29,039 ALL: Cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo, cuckoo... 280 00:12:29,123 --> 00:12:30,541 Stop it. Stop it! 281 00:12:30,624 --> 00:12:32,585 Warren! Melvin! Gary! Dot! Gordy! 282 00:12:32,668 --> 00:12:35,421 Look, lady, I'm supposed to be in the fourth grade. 283 00:12:35,504 --> 00:12:38,716 Sounds to me like someone's got a case of "the s'pose'das." 284 00:12:38,799 --> 00:12:41,010 (groans) 285 00:12:44,180 --> 00:12:45,181 -(hard slap) -Warren! 286 00:12:50,478 --> 00:12:52,730 Wild flowers! 287 00:12:52,813 --> 00:12:55,232 We don't have you in Springfield. 288 00:12:55,316 --> 00:12:56,317 (chittering ) 289 00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:58,235 Hello, Mr. Chipmunk. 290 00:12:58,319 --> 00:13:01,197 You're a northern reticulated chipmunk. 291 00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:02,948 Yes, you are. 292 00:13:03,032 --> 00:13:05,117 You are so reticulated. 293 00:13:05,201 --> 00:13:07,411 Hi, Mrs. Owl. 294 00:13:07,495 --> 00:13:09,038 You're out kind of early. 295 00:13:09,121 --> 00:13:10,706 ♪ La-la-la, la-la... ♪ 296 00:13:10,790 --> 00:13:12,500 (hooting) 297 00:13:16,837 --> 00:13:19,548 Mr. Scorpio says productivity is up two percent, 298 00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:22,885 and it's all because of my motivational techniques, 299 00:13:22,968 --> 00:13:27,139 like doughnuts and the possibility of more doughnuts to come. 300 00:13:27,223 --> 00:13:29,391 I knew you'd do well, Homer. 301 00:13:29,475 --> 00:13:32,144 Sports collectibles. 302 00:13:32,228 --> 00:13:35,481 Wow, a baseball made out of Secretariat. 303 00:13:35,564 --> 00:13:37,233 (gasping ) 304 00:13:37,316 --> 00:13:40,569 Tom Landry's hat, and it's autographed. 305 00:13:40,653 --> 00:13:42,321 "To Berman's Dry Cleaning. 306 00:13:42,404 --> 00:13:45,282 Best wishes, Tom Landry." 307 00:13:45,366 --> 00:13:47,117 Why don't you buy it? 308 00:13:47,201 --> 00:13:48,828 I can't buy that. 309 00:13:48,911 --> 00:13:51,163 Only management-type guys with big salaries like me 310 00:13:51,247 --> 00:13:52,790 can afford things like that. 311 00:13:52,873 --> 00:13:54,708 (gasps) Guys like me. 312 00:13:54,792 --> 00:13:56,252 I'm a guy like me. 313 00:13:56,335 --> 00:13:58,671 All right, team, it's the fourth quarter. 314 00:13:58,754 --> 00:14:01,090 The Lord gave us the atoms, and it's up to us 315 00:14:01,173 --> 00:14:04,093 to make them dance. 316 00:14:04,176 --> 00:14:06,804 Hey, if Tom Landry's hat doesn't motivate you, 317 00:14:06,887 --> 00:14:09,348 then I should just quit right now. 318 00:14:09,431 --> 00:14:11,267 I'm sorry, we're just a little tired, sir. 319 00:14:11,350 --> 00:14:12,685 We've been pushing ourselves real hard 320 00:14:12,768 --> 00:14:13,894 to get the reactor on-line. 321 00:14:13,978 --> 00:14:15,521 Tired, eh? 322 00:14:15,604 --> 00:14:19,024 What you guys need is hammocks. 323 00:14:23,028 --> 00:14:25,239 Uh, hi, Homer. What can I do for you? 324 00:14:25,322 --> 00:14:27,658 Sir, I need to know where can I get some business hammocks? 325 00:14:27,741 --> 00:14:28,826 Hammocks? 326 00:14:28,909 --> 00:14:30,411 My goodness, what an idea. 327 00:14:30,494 --> 00:14:32,371 Why didn't I think of that? Hammocks. 328 00:14:32,454 --> 00:14:34,456 Homer, there's four places. 329 00:14:34,540 --> 00:14:36,375 -There's the Hammock Hut. That's on Third. -Uh-huh. 330 00:14:36,458 --> 00:14:37,459 -There's Hammocks-R-US. -Got it. 331 00:14:37,543 --> 00:14:38,669 That's on Third too. 332 00:14:38,752 --> 00:14:40,546 -You got Put-Your-Butt-There. -Mm-hmm. 333 00:14:40,629 --> 00:14:42,047 -That's on Third. -Yes. 334 00:14:42,131 --> 00:14:43,841 -Swing Low, Sweet Chariot. -Right. 335 00:14:43,924 --> 00:14:45,384 Matter of fact, they're all in the same complex. 336 00:14:45,467 --> 00:14:47,052 It's the Hammock Complex down on Third. 337 00:14:47,136 --> 00:14:48,137 Oh, the Hammock District. 338 00:14:48,220 --> 00:14:49,430 That's right. 339 00:14:49,513 --> 00:14:51,390 Ready for the linkup, Mr. Scorpio. 340 00:14:51,473 --> 00:14:52,808 Homer, one second. I got to take care of this. 341 00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:54,643 Very important. Be right back. 342 00:14:54,727 --> 00:14:55,728 Fine. 343 00:14:58,105 --> 00:15:00,274 Good afternoon, gentlemen. 344 00:15:00,357 --> 00:15:01,567 This is Scorpio. 345 00:15:01,650 --> 00:15:03,027 I have the doomsday device. 346 00:15:03,110 --> 00:15:05,404 You have 72 hours to deliver the gold, 347 00:15:05,487 --> 00:15:07,448 or you'll face the consequences. 348 00:15:07,531 --> 00:15:10,409 And to prove I'm not bluffing, watch this. 349 00:15:11,368 --> 00:15:13,954 (explosion) 350 00:15:14,038 --> 00:15:16,790 Oh, my God, the 59th Street bridge. 351 00:15:16,874 --> 00:15:19,501 Maybe it just collapsed on its own. 352 00:15:19,585 --> 00:15:21,086 We can't take that chance. 353 00:15:21,170 --> 00:15:22,421 You always say that. 354 00:15:22,504 --> 00:15:23,964 I want to take a chance. 355 00:15:24,048 --> 00:15:25,591 Collapsed on its own? 356 00:15:25,674 --> 00:15:27,551 You... You have 72 hours. 357 00:15:27,635 --> 00:15:30,304 See you. Back to the hammocks, my friend. 358 00:15:30,387 --> 00:15:31,764 -Yes. -You know there's a little place 359 00:15:31,847 --> 00:15:33,265 called Mary Ann's Hammocks. 360 00:15:33,349 --> 00:15:34,850 The nice thing about that place 361 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,685 is Mary Ann gets in the hammock with you. 362 00:15:36,769 --> 00:15:38,771 -(laughs) I'm just kidding. -Oh. 363 00:15:38,854 --> 00:15:40,147 -You know who invented the hammock, Homer? -No. 364 00:15:40,230 --> 00:15:42,441 That's something for you to do. Find that out. 365 00:15:49,698 --> 00:15:51,659 Any sugar around here? 366 00:15:51,742 --> 00:15:53,285 Try in there, Homer. 367 00:15:57,915 --> 00:15:59,625 SCORPIO: Hi, Homer. 368 00:15:59,708 --> 00:16:01,377 I'm keeping two of my fingers crossed 369 00:16:01,460 --> 00:16:02,544 that you're going to have that nuclear generator 370 00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:04,213 up to full power by tomorrow. 371 00:16:04,296 --> 00:16:05,798 Yes, sir. No problemo. 372 00:16:05,881 --> 00:16:07,800 Good. By the way, Homer. 373 00:16:07,883 --> 00:16:10,052 What's your least favorite country? Italy or France? 374 00:16:10,135 --> 00:16:11,595 -France. -(chuckling) 375 00:16:11,679 --> 00:16:13,889 Nobody ever says Italy. 376 00:16:17,851 --> 00:16:20,145 I never noticed this office before. 377 00:16:20,229 --> 00:16:21,563 Why should you? It's mine. 378 00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:23,232 Eh, you have any sugar around here? 379 00:16:23,315 --> 00:16:24,566 Sugar? Sure. 380 00:16:25,734 --> 00:16:27,695 There you go. 381 00:16:27,778 --> 00:16:30,572 Sorry it's not in packages. Want some cream? 382 00:16:30,656 --> 00:16:32,825 Uh... ye... no. 383 00:16:42,042 --> 00:16:44,628 (ominous music playing) 384 00:16:44,712 --> 00:16:46,088 ♪ I like me ♪ 385 00:16:46,171 --> 00:16:47,631 ♪ I like me ♪ 386 00:16:47,715 --> 00:16:50,592 ♪ I'm as good as I can be ♪ 387 00:16:50,676 --> 00:16:54,179 ♪ With a smile and a wave and a happy melody ♪ 388 00:16:54,263 --> 00:16:56,598 ♪ I'm as good as... ♪ 389 00:16:56,682 --> 00:16:58,517 ♪ I... ♪ 390 00:16:58,600 --> 00:16:59,560 Hooray! 391 00:16:59,643 --> 00:17:01,103 Everyone's a winner. 392 00:17:01,186 --> 00:17:02,354 (groans) 393 00:17:02,438 --> 00:17:05,024 (humming) 394 00:17:05,107 --> 00:17:07,651 Oh, the whole forest is blooming. 395 00:17:07,735 --> 00:17:09,236 (sniffs) 396 00:17:09,319 --> 00:17:10,279 (sneezes) 397 00:17:10,362 --> 00:17:11,363 Excuse me. 398 00:17:13,782 --> 00:17:16,076 Oh, my eyes are burning. 399 00:17:17,202 --> 00:17:20,372 (loud sneezing) 400 00:17:20,456 --> 00:17:22,708 (coughing) 401 00:17:22,791 --> 00:17:25,586 Oh, little chipmunk friend. 402 00:17:25,669 --> 00:17:27,212 I'm allergic to everything. 403 00:17:28,922 --> 00:17:31,050 -(sneezes) -(chitters) 404 00:17:31,133 --> 00:17:33,177 (sneezing) 405 00:17:33,260 --> 00:17:35,220 -(sneezing continues) -(birds chirping) 406 00:17:39,099 --> 00:17:40,517 (machine powering up) 407 00:17:42,102 --> 00:17:45,439 Ingenious, isn't it, Mr. Bont? 408 00:17:45,522 --> 00:17:47,357 Scorpio, you're totally mad. 409 00:17:47,441 --> 00:17:49,735 Heh. I wouldn't point fingers, you jerk. 410 00:17:49,818 --> 00:17:51,737 So, do you expect me to talk? 411 00:17:51,820 --> 00:17:53,405 I don't expect anything from you, 412 00:17:53,489 --> 00:17:55,407 except to die and be a very cheap funeral. 413 00:17:55,491 --> 00:17:57,117 You're going to die now. 414 00:17:58,744 --> 00:18:00,037 (grunts) 415 00:18:08,504 --> 00:18:10,339 Stop him! He's supposed to die! 416 00:18:13,550 --> 00:18:16,095 Nice work, Homer. Am I proud of you. 417 00:18:16,178 --> 00:18:17,805 Well... 418 00:18:17,888 --> 00:18:19,473 When you go home tonight, there's going to be 419 00:18:19,556 --> 00:18:21,308 another story on your house. 420 00:18:21,391 --> 00:18:23,393 -Thank you. -(guns firing) 421 00:18:23,477 --> 00:18:27,606 I tackled a loafer at work today. 422 00:18:27,689 --> 00:18:30,317 Hey, what's with you sad sacks? 423 00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:32,361 I'm allergic to everything here. 424 00:18:32,444 --> 00:18:34,029 My nose is so stuffed up 425 00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:37,074 I can't even taste Mom's delicious boiled celery. 426 00:18:37,157 --> 00:18:39,368 I've been so bored since we moved here, 427 00:18:39,451 --> 00:18:41,954 I found myself drinking a glass of wine every day. 428 00:18:42,037 --> 00:18:44,540 I know doctors say you should drink a glass and a half, 429 00:18:44,623 --> 00:18:46,500 but I just can't drink that much. 430 00:18:46,583 --> 00:18:49,545 Well, the Simpson men are doing fine, right, Bart? 431 00:18:49,628 --> 00:18:51,797 You haven't even gotten in trouble at school. 432 00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:53,674 I can't get in trouble at school. 433 00:18:53,757 --> 00:18:55,717 They put me in the remedial class. 434 00:18:55,801 --> 00:18:57,136 I'm surrounded by arsonists 435 00:18:57,219 --> 00:18:58,303 and kids with mittens pinned to their jackets 436 00:18:58,387 --> 00:18:59,429 all year 'round. 437 00:19:01,390 --> 00:19:02,933 Hey, Dad... 438 00:19:03,016 --> 00:19:05,686 ALL: We want to go back to Springfield. 439 00:19:05,769 --> 00:19:08,272 What? We've got it great here. 440 00:19:08,355 --> 00:19:10,232 And for the first time in my life, 441 00:19:10,315 --> 00:19:12,526 I'm actually good at my job. 442 00:19:12,609 --> 00:19:16,029 My team is way ahead of the weather machine and germ warfare divisions. 443 00:19:16,113 --> 00:19:18,282 It's up to you, Homer. 444 00:19:18,365 --> 00:19:21,034 Whatever you decide, that's what we'll do. 445 00:19:21,118 --> 00:19:22,786 (whimpers) 446 00:19:32,254 --> 00:19:35,465 WOMAN (on P.A.): "T" minus one minute, 35 seconds. 447 00:19:46,435 --> 00:19:49,021 Uh... I've got a problem, Hank. 448 00:19:49,104 --> 00:19:51,023 Oh, gee, Homer, could it wait a sec, please? 449 00:19:51,106 --> 00:19:53,150 Well, it's pretty important. 450 00:19:53,233 --> 00:19:57,112 -(grunting) -Say, what's going on? 451 00:19:57,196 --> 00:19:58,697 I'm having a little trouble with the government. 452 00:19:58,780 --> 00:20:01,658 Oh, those jerks always walking over the small businessman. 453 00:20:01,742 --> 00:20:04,244 Don't get me started about the government. 454 00:20:04,328 --> 00:20:05,454 What's the problem? 455 00:20:05,537 --> 00:20:08,165 Well, my family wants to move back to Springfield. 456 00:20:08,248 --> 00:20:10,584 Let them go. You'll stay here with me, we'll go bowling. 457 00:20:10,667 --> 00:20:12,127 What's bothering them? 458 00:20:12,211 --> 00:20:14,463 Nothing big. It's just a lot of little things. 459 00:20:14,546 --> 00:20:16,465 Well, you can't argue with the little things. 460 00:20:16,548 --> 00:20:18,550 It's the little things that make up life. 461 00:20:20,177 --> 00:20:21,929 Homer, I'm disappointed, 462 00:20:22,012 --> 00:20:23,931 but I think you need to do what's best for your family. 463 00:20:24,014 --> 00:20:26,558 Well, thanks for everything, Hank. 464 00:20:26,642 --> 00:20:28,936 WOMAN (on P.A.): "T" minus 14 seconds. 465 00:20:29,019 --> 00:20:30,437 If you need anything, you call me. 466 00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:31,730 Alright, what's the number? 467 00:20:31,813 --> 00:20:33,398 I've never had to call my own company. 468 00:20:33,482 --> 00:20:36,443 Someone will tell you upstairs. But Homer, on your way out, 469 00:20:36,526 --> 00:20:38,528 if you want to kill somebody, it would help me a lot. 470 00:20:44,660 --> 00:20:46,662 (evil laughter ) 471 00:20:48,580 --> 00:20:51,166 Hey, Homer, you're missing out on some fun. 472 00:21:12,187 --> 00:21:14,189 Uh-oh. Sorry. 473 00:21:14,273 --> 00:21:17,484 Let me just get my girlfriend, and I'll go. 474 00:21:17,567 --> 00:21:19,319 Hey, Crystal, wake up. 475 00:21:19,403 --> 00:21:21,029 (doorbell ringing) 476 00:21:21,113 --> 00:21:22,197 Telegram. 477 00:21:24,366 --> 00:21:28,203 "Project Arcturus couldn't have succeeded without you. 478 00:21:28,287 --> 00:21:31,456 "This will get you a little closer to that dream of yours. 479 00:21:31,540 --> 00:21:34,376 "It's not the Dallas Cowboys, but it's a start. 480 00:21:34,459 --> 00:21:38,630 Drop me a line if you're on the East Coast, Hank Scorpio." 481 00:21:40,841 --> 00:21:43,635 Ah, the Denver Broncos? 482 00:21:43,719 --> 00:21:46,513 I think owning the Denver Broncos is pretty good. 483 00:21:46,596 --> 00:21:49,683 -Yeah, yeah. -Well, explain to me why it isn't. 484 00:21:49,766 --> 00:21:53,353 (sighs) You just don't understand football, Marge. 485 00:22:00,152 --> 00:22:02,487 {\an8}♪ Scorpio ♪ 486 00:22:02,571 --> 00:22:05,866 {\an8}♪ He'll sting you with his dreams of power and wealth ♪ 487 00:22:05,949 --> 00:22:08,368 {\an8}♪ Beware of, Scorpio... ♪ 488 00:22:08,452 --> 00:22:10,912 {\an8}♪ His twisted twin obsessions are his plot to rule the world ♪ 489 00:22:10,996 --> 00:22:12,789 {\an8}♪ And his employees health ♪ 490 00:22:12,873 --> 00:22:15,667 {\an8}♪ He'll welcome you into his lair ♪ 491 00:22:15,751 --> 00:22:19,087 {\an8}♪ Like the nobleman welcomes his guest ♪ 492 00:22:19,171 --> 00:22:20,714 {\an8}♪ With free dental care ♪ 493 00:22:20,797 --> 00:22:24,926 {\an8}♪ And a stock plan that helps you invest ♪ 494 00:22:25,010 --> 00:22:28,555 {\an8}♪ But beware of his generous pensions ♪ 495 00:22:28,638 --> 00:22:31,850 {\an8}♪ Plus three weeks paid vacation each year ♪ 496 00:22:31,933 --> 00:22:33,643 {\an8}♪ And on Fridays the lunchroom ♪ 497 00:22:33,727 --> 00:22:36,855 {\an8}♪ Serves hot dogs and burgers and beer! ♪ 498 00:22:36,938 --> 00:22:39,274 {\an8}♪ He loves German beer! ♪ 499 00:22:40,984 --> 00:22:42,319 Shh! 500 00:22:45,447 --> 00:22:48,700 {\an8}CAPTIONS ENHANCED BY ROUNDABOUT ENTERTAINMENT INC.