1 00:00:01,001 --> 00:00:02,293 (theme music playing) 2 00:00:03,253 --> 00:00:06,673 CHORUS: ♪ The Simpsons ♪ 3 00:00:08,758 --> 00:00:10,385 (theme music playing) 4 00:00:17,058 --> 00:00:19,102 (bell ringing) 5 00:00:23,606 --> 00:00:25,150 (whistle blowing) 6 00:00:30,321 --> 00:00:31,406 (beeping) 7 00:00:36,244 --> 00:00:38,955 (playing the blues) 8 00:00:46,588 --> 00:00:47,547 (tires screeching) 9 00:00:59,100 --> 00:00:59,934 (honking horn) 10 00:01:04,355 --> 00:01:06,107 D'oh! (screams) 11 00:01:06,733 --> 00:01:07,901 (tires screeching) 12 00:01:10,361 --> 00:01:11,946 (screaming) 13 00:01:24,042 --> 00:01:25,502 NARRATOR: Is this the kind of air 14 00:01:25,585 --> 00:01:26,961 we want to leave for our children? 15 00:01:27,045 --> 00:01:29,881 (children coughing) 16 00:01:31,591 --> 00:01:32,550 (grunts) 17 00:01:32,634 --> 00:01:34,302 NARRATOR: Don't they deserve better? 18 00:01:34,844 --> 00:01:35,804 (chewing) 19 00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:37,764 (gulping) 20 00:01:39,015 --> 00:01:41,351 NARRATOR: Electricity, the fuel of the future. 21 00:01:43,269 --> 00:01:44,145 (gasping, murmuring) 22 00:01:45,438 --> 00:01:47,357 NARRATOR: Test-drive the Elec-Taurus today 23 00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:48,775 and get a free gift. 24 00:01:49,317 --> 00:01:50,401 {\an8}(gasps, sniffs) 25 00:01:50,485 --> 00:01:52,654 {\an8}My children deserve to see me 26 00:01:52,737 --> 00:01:54,114 {\an8}get a free gift. 27 00:01:55,865 --> 00:01:57,283 {\an8}I'm proud of you, Dad. 28 00:01:57,367 --> 00:01:59,911 {\an8}Buying an electric car will help clean the air up 29 00:01:59,994 --> 00:02:01,371 {\an8}and protect the earth's supply-- 30 00:02:01,454 --> 00:02:03,373 {\an8}You're faking this to get the gift, aren't you? 31 00:02:03,706 --> 00:02:05,708 {\an8}But I like the nice things you said about me. 32 00:02:06,084 --> 00:02:07,877 {\an8}Thinking of saying good-bye to gas? 33 00:02:07,961 --> 00:02:09,629 {\an8}You betcha. (burps) 34 00:02:09,712 --> 00:02:11,005 {\an8}Bart! (farts) 35 00:02:11,089 --> 00:02:12,507 {\an8}Well, that shut me up. 36 00:02:12,590 --> 00:02:15,426 {\an8}Hello. I, uh, love your planet deeply 37 00:02:15,510 --> 00:02:17,220 {\an8}and I'm interested in purchasing 38 00:02:17,303 --> 00:02:18,930 {\an8}one of your electronic autos. 39 00:02:19,013 --> 00:02:20,473 {\an8}(snickering) 40 00:02:21,349 --> 00:02:22,892 {\an8}Well, it's always nice to meet people 41 00:02:22,976 --> 00:02:24,519 {\an8}concerned about the environment. 42 00:02:24,602 --> 00:02:25,520 {\an8}What kind of mint? 43 00:02:27,564 --> 00:02:28,898 {\an8}Boy, that quiet engine 44 00:02:28,982 --> 00:02:31,442 {\an8}sure makes conversation a lot easier. 45 00:02:31,526 --> 00:02:34,028 {\an8}Yeah, it's got a lot of other problems, too. 46 00:02:34,112 --> 00:02:36,489 {\an8}Uh, Dad, you're headed for the harbor! 47 00:02:37,115 --> 00:02:39,159 HOMER: Relax. We're in an electric car. 48 00:02:39,242 --> 00:02:41,327 (screaming) 49 00:02:44,122 --> 00:02:46,499 See, everything's fine. 50 00:02:46,583 --> 00:02:47,792 (gasps) Dolphins. 51 00:02:48,793 --> 00:02:49,669 Oopsie. 52 00:02:50,461 --> 00:02:51,379 Hi, girls. 53 00:02:51,462 --> 00:02:52,547 (screaming) 54 00:02:52,881 --> 00:02:53,756 HOMER: Oh... 55 00:02:57,719 --> 00:02:59,554 {\an8}Saltwater seems to be good for it. 56 00:03:00,805 --> 00:03:01,681 (Bart coughing) 57 00:03:02,599 --> 00:03:04,434 (Homer humming) 58 00:03:04,517 --> 00:03:05,351 Um, I'm sorry, 59 00:03:05,435 --> 00:03:07,395 {\an8}the car does not meet my eco-concern. 60 00:03:07,478 --> 00:03:08,646 {\an8}Can I have my prize now? 61 00:03:08,730 --> 00:03:09,564 {\an8}Certainly. 62 00:03:13,193 --> 00:03:14,194 {\an8}What the... 63 00:03:14,277 --> 00:03:16,613 {\an8}CAR COMPUTER: Help! Help! It burns! 64 00:03:19,073 --> 00:03:20,909 {\an8}Hey, we never opened that envelope 65 00:03:20,992 --> 00:03:22,493 {\an8}to see what our gift is. 66 00:03:22,577 --> 00:03:23,536 {\an8}We didn't? 67 00:03:23,620 --> 00:03:24,537 {\an8}That's odd. 68 00:03:24,621 --> 00:03:25,788 {\an8}Seems like we would have done that 69 00:03:25,872 --> 00:03:27,415 {\an8}right after we left the car place. 70 00:03:27,498 --> 00:03:29,042 {\an8}I know, but we didn't. 71 00:03:29,125 --> 00:03:30,210 {\an8}Well, here it is. 72 00:03:30,293 --> 00:03:32,378 {\an8}So we can open it and find out now. 73 00:03:32,462 --> 00:03:33,421 {\an8}Perfect. 74 00:03:34,672 --> 00:03:36,174 {\an8}Aw, movie tickets? 75 00:03:36,257 --> 00:03:38,635 {\an8}It hardly seems worth destroying a car. 76 00:03:39,093 --> 00:03:40,595 {\an8}They're passes to a test screening 77 00:03:40,678 --> 00:03:41,930 {\an8}of a new movie starring... 78 00:03:42,013 --> 00:03:42,847 {\an8}(gasps) 79 00:03:42,931 --> 00:03:44,307 {\an8}Mel Gibson. 80 00:03:44,390 --> 00:03:45,225 Who else is in it? 81 00:03:45,308 --> 00:03:47,101 Who cares? Mel Gibson. 82 00:03:47,185 --> 00:03:48,895 Mel Gibson is just a guy, Marge. 83 00:03:48,978 --> 00:03:50,438 No different than me or Lenny. 84 00:03:50,521 --> 00:03:53,566 Were you or Lenny ever named sexiest man alive? 85 00:03:53,650 --> 00:03:55,068 Hmm, I'm not certain about Lenny. 86 00:03:55,151 --> 00:03:58,029 Besides, it's not just his chiseled good looks. 87 00:03:58,112 --> 00:04:00,782 People magazine says he's a devoted father, 88 00:04:00,865 --> 00:04:02,325 goes to church every week, 89 00:04:02,408 --> 00:04:03,743 and likes to fix things around the... 90 00:04:03,826 --> 00:04:05,662 -Homer, let's make love. -Uh, okay. 91 00:04:07,288 --> 00:04:10,541 (smooching) 92 00:04:10,875 --> 00:04:13,086 Uh, you're thinking about me, right? 93 00:04:13,169 --> 00:04:14,796 Of course, Homie. 94 00:04:14,879 --> 00:04:16,297 Aren't you thinking about me? 95 00:04:16,381 --> 00:04:17,548 Well, I will now! 96 00:04:20,593 --> 00:04:22,512 Easy, easy, there, buster. 97 00:04:23,304 --> 00:04:24,639 But how did they know? 98 00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:27,809 I had a mouse. 99 00:04:28,685 --> 00:04:29,519 Thank you. 100 00:04:30,395 --> 00:04:31,896 (clearing throat) Good evening. 101 00:04:31,980 --> 00:04:32,939 I'm Edward Christian, 102 00:04:33,022 --> 00:04:34,816 Assistant VP of finance and distribution 103 00:04:34,899 --> 00:04:36,109 at Polystar Pictures. 104 00:04:36,192 --> 00:04:39,070 (applause and cheers) 105 00:04:39,153 --> 00:04:41,364 Dang, I should have brought the camera. 106 00:04:41,447 --> 00:04:43,866 Also with me tonight are the dynamic duo, 107 00:04:43,950 --> 00:04:45,368 William Milo and Robin Hannah 108 00:04:45,451 --> 00:04:47,453 who green-lighted all of Shaquille O'Neal's movies, 109 00:04:47,537 --> 00:04:48,788 including Kazaam! 110 00:04:48,871 --> 00:04:50,707 (all murmuring) 111 00:04:50,790 --> 00:04:52,208 How's the popcorn, guys? 112 00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:53,793 -Needs salt! -Needs salt! 113 00:04:53,876 --> 00:04:56,129 (all laughing) 114 00:04:58,589 --> 00:05:01,426 Anyhoo, welcome to our test screening 115 00:05:01,509 --> 00:05:04,220 of Mel Gibson's directorial follow-up to Braveheart, 116 00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:06,306 a remake of the Jimmy Stewart classic, 117 00:05:06,389 --> 00:05:07,974 Mr. Smith Goes To Washington. 118 00:05:08,057 --> 00:05:09,350 (applause and cheers) 119 00:05:09,434 --> 00:05:11,477 I knew I shouldn't have passed on that. 120 00:05:11,561 --> 00:05:12,854 Now, after the film, 121 00:05:12,937 --> 00:05:15,565 I'll be handing out these cards for your opinion. 122 00:05:15,648 --> 00:05:17,150 We then take your cards 123 00:05:17,233 --> 00:05:19,652 to Hollywood, California. 124 00:05:19,736 --> 00:05:20,862 (all gasping) 125 00:05:20,945 --> 00:05:23,323 ...And change the movie based on your suggestions. 126 00:05:23,406 --> 00:05:24,407 Any, uh, questions? 127 00:05:24,490 --> 00:05:25,616 Yes. Over here and thank you. 128 00:05:25,700 --> 00:05:26,576 (clears throat) Hi. Will there be 129 00:05:26,659 --> 00:05:28,286 any Flubber in this movie? 130 00:05:28,369 --> 00:05:29,495 Uh-hi. Glayvin. 131 00:05:29,579 --> 00:05:31,664 (laughs) No, I'm afraid not. 132 00:05:31,748 --> 00:05:33,291 Ah, for cryin' out, Glayvin! 133 00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:35,585 Is Mel Gibson here? 134 00:05:35,668 --> 00:05:37,628 No, sorry, but like all celebrities, 135 00:05:37,712 --> 00:05:40,673 he's in Hollywood attending benefits for various diseases. 136 00:05:40,757 --> 00:05:43,593 (applause and cheers) 137 00:05:48,014 --> 00:05:49,182 -(gasping) -Did they like it? 138 00:05:49,265 --> 00:05:50,808 Well, they haven't seen it yet, Mel. 139 00:05:50,892 --> 00:05:52,643 How'd you get here from LA so fast? 140 00:05:52,727 --> 00:05:54,270 John Travolta flew me in his jet. 141 00:05:54,645 --> 00:05:56,481 Now I have to help him move next weekend. 142 00:05:56,564 --> 00:05:57,482 He deliberately waited 143 00:05:57,565 --> 00:05:58,733 till we were in the air to ask me. 144 00:05:58,816 --> 00:06:00,568 You know, you really didn't have to make this trip, Mel. 145 00:06:00,651 --> 00:06:02,737 The screening is going to go fine. Believe me. 146 00:06:02,820 --> 00:06:05,281 I don't know. I think this movie was a big mistake. 147 00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:06,699 All I do is talk for two hours. 148 00:06:06,783 --> 00:06:08,493 I don't shoot anybody. What was I thinking? 149 00:06:08,576 --> 00:06:09,786 You shouldn't worry about the movie. 150 00:06:09,869 --> 00:06:12,038 William and I both think it's fabulous. 151 00:06:12,121 --> 00:06:13,539 And I think we know a little something 152 00:06:13,623 --> 00:06:14,582 about the movie business. 153 00:06:14,665 --> 00:06:16,626 (chuckles) Oh, Robin. You've got to see 154 00:06:16,709 --> 00:06:17,919 the director's cut of Booty Call. 155 00:06:18,002 --> 00:06:19,003 It's fabulous. 156 00:06:19,087 --> 00:06:20,546 What, even better than the original? 157 00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:21,923 'Cause that was pretty fabulous, too. 158 00:06:23,966 --> 00:06:25,551 ...And he fought for them once. 159 00:06:26,386 --> 00:06:28,679 For the only reason any man ever does 160 00:06:28,763 --> 00:06:31,891 because of one plain, simple rule: 161 00:06:32,266 --> 00:06:33,935 Love thy neighbor. 162 00:06:34,018 --> 00:06:35,770 Boring. 163 00:06:35,853 --> 00:06:36,771 It's not boring. 164 00:06:36,854 --> 00:06:38,981 He's passionate about government. 165 00:06:39,065 --> 00:06:41,150 Pft. At least the Jimmy Stewart version 166 00:06:41,234 --> 00:06:43,611 had that giant rabbit who ran the savings and loan. 167 00:06:43,694 --> 00:06:44,529 Shh! 168 00:06:44,946 --> 00:06:46,114 (all murmuring) 169 00:06:46,197 --> 00:06:47,115 Excellent. 170 00:06:47,865 --> 00:06:49,700 That man knows how to filibuster. 171 00:06:49,784 --> 00:06:51,619 Well, that was a stinker. 172 00:06:51,702 --> 00:06:52,703 I liked it. 173 00:06:52,787 --> 00:06:54,080 It was nice to see a movie 174 00:06:54,163 --> 00:06:56,249 where people solve their problems with words 175 00:06:56,332 --> 00:06:58,334 instead of bullets and chasing. 176 00:06:58,418 --> 00:06:59,335 Oh, you're just saying that 177 00:06:59,419 --> 00:07:01,421 because your boyfriend was in it. 178 00:07:01,504 --> 00:07:02,630 I'll bet you would have hated it 179 00:07:02,713 --> 00:07:04,757 if me and Lenny were Mr. Smith. 180 00:07:04,841 --> 00:07:06,926 Will you stop acting so jealous! 181 00:07:07,343 --> 00:07:09,262 Listen, I don't want to get spotted by the crowd, 182 00:07:09,345 --> 00:07:11,055 so I'm going to take a leak behind the dumpster. 183 00:07:12,014 --> 00:07:13,391 (alarm ringing) 184 00:07:13,474 --> 00:07:14,642 (all gasping) 185 00:07:14,725 --> 00:07:16,144 Look! It's Mel Gibson. 186 00:07:16,227 --> 00:07:17,687 Hey, everybody rush over there. 187 00:07:17,770 --> 00:07:19,230 (all screaming) 188 00:07:20,523 --> 00:07:21,816 WIGGUM: Hi, Mel. Hi. 189 00:07:21,899 --> 00:07:23,192 Hi, Mel, Mel. 190 00:07:25,111 --> 00:07:25,945 Hi, everybody. 191 00:07:26,028 --> 00:07:27,155 (all gasp) 192 00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:29,699 Hi, Mr. Gibson. 193 00:07:29,782 --> 00:07:30,825 Thanks for coming, folks. 194 00:07:30,908 --> 00:07:33,077 And don't be afraid to be completely truthful 195 00:07:33,161 --> 00:07:34,745 when you fill out your opinion cards. 196 00:07:34,829 --> 00:07:37,039 Honesty is the foundation of the movie business. 197 00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:38,666 Oh, we'll be honest. (chuckles) 198 00:07:38,749 --> 00:07:41,169 We could never lie to you, Mel. (chuckles) 199 00:07:41,252 --> 00:07:42,879 Um, will you be reading 200 00:07:42,962 --> 00:07:44,547 the cards yourself, Mel? 201 00:07:44,630 --> 00:07:46,799 Well, I'll be reading yours personally. 202 00:07:47,341 --> 00:07:48,176 (sexy growl) 203 00:07:48,259 --> 00:07:49,677 -(panting) -(all gasp) 204 00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:51,596 (all laughing) 205 00:07:51,679 --> 00:07:52,513 (grunts) 206 00:07:53,097 --> 00:07:55,475 That's it. I'm telling Mr. Stupidest man alive 207 00:07:55,558 --> 00:07:56,809 what I really thought of his movie. 208 00:07:56,893 --> 00:07:58,311 -Hey, Gibson! -Uh, yes, sir. 209 00:07:58,394 --> 00:08:00,146 -Got a pencil? -There you go. 210 00:08:00,229 --> 00:08:01,063 Thanks. 211 00:08:01,147 --> 00:08:04,025 (muttering) You waste my time in front of this stupid-- 212 00:08:04,108 --> 00:08:05,318 Appreciate it. (grunts) 213 00:08:05,401 --> 00:08:06,861 (muttering) 214 00:08:08,696 --> 00:08:10,781 The movie tested through the roof, Mel. 215 00:08:10,865 --> 00:08:13,201 The sea captain gave it "Four Arrrrs." 216 00:08:13,284 --> 00:08:15,161 Bumblebee man says, "Muy bueno." 217 00:08:15,244 --> 00:08:17,038 And we were worried about the Latino market, huh? 218 00:08:17,121 --> 00:08:18,623 -Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. -Huh? Huh? Huh? 219 00:08:18,706 --> 00:08:19,624 Worried. 220 00:08:19,707 --> 00:08:21,083 Come on, they can't all have loved it. 221 00:08:21,167 --> 00:08:22,919 "Loved it." "Loved it." "Loved it." 222 00:08:23,294 --> 00:08:25,546 "Loved it despite absence of Flubber, Glayvin"? 223 00:08:26,005 --> 00:08:27,340 Oh, here we go. "Your movie 224 00:08:27,423 --> 00:08:29,175 was more boring than church. 225 00:08:29,258 --> 00:08:30,885 All you did was yak, yak, yak. 226 00:08:30,968 --> 00:08:33,012 You didn't even shoot anybody." Damn, I knew it! 227 00:08:33,095 --> 00:08:34,597 Oh, don't do this to yourself, Mel. 228 00:08:34,680 --> 00:08:36,224 The guy's obviously a nut. 229 00:08:36,307 --> 00:08:38,100 Maybe. Or maybe he's the only person 230 00:08:38,184 --> 00:08:39,852 with the guts to tell me the truth. 231 00:08:40,436 --> 00:08:41,437 Turn the plane around. 232 00:08:41,896 --> 00:08:43,940 I want to go to 742 Evergreen Terrace. 233 00:08:44,482 --> 00:08:46,317 But you promised to help me move. 234 00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:47,485 Oh, geez! 235 00:08:51,030 --> 00:08:52,990 (aircraft approaching) 236 00:08:53,324 --> 00:08:55,326 (loud rumbling) 237 00:08:55,409 --> 00:08:56,994 -(doorbell ringing) -Door, Marge. 238 00:08:57,078 --> 00:08:58,120 (growls) 239 00:09:01,332 --> 00:09:02,291 (gasps) 240 00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:04,627 I'm looking for... Homer Simpson. 241 00:09:04,710 --> 00:09:06,712 And I've been looking for you, too, pal. 242 00:09:06,796 --> 00:09:07,797 Pound him, Dad. 243 00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:08,839 Bart, don't. 244 00:09:08,923 --> 00:09:11,425 Quiet. Dad's going to get his butt kicked by Mel Gibson. 245 00:09:11,509 --> 00:09:13,010 Knock his teeth out, Homer! 246 00:09:13,094 --> 00:09:16,055 Listen, Gibson, I'm tired of Hollywood pretty boys 247 00:09:16,138 --> 00:09:18,558 like you and Jack Valenti 248 00:09:18,641 --> 00:09:20,810 thinking you can have any woman you want. 249 00:09:20,893 --> 00:09:21,894 You see this? 250 00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:24,647 It symbolizes that she's my property 251 00:09:24,730 --> 00:09:26,023 and I own her. 252 00:09:26,107 --> 00:09:28,067 Mr. Simpson, I need your help. 253 00:09:28,150 --> 00:09:28,985 Uh? 254 00:09:29,402 --> 00:09:30,653 I think you're right about my movie, 255 00:09:30,736 --> 00:09:32,905 and I want you to help me make it better. 256 00:09:32,989 --> 00:09:34,824 Really? You want my help? 257 00:09:35,199 --> 00:09:36,534 Marge, did you hear that? 258 00:09:36,617 --> 00:09:38,411 Mel Gibson wants my help. 259 00:09:38,494 --> 00:09:39,453 Mel Gibson. 260 00:09:39,787 --> 00:09:40,788 But, Dad, I thought you hated... 261 00:09:40,871 --> 00:09:41,956 Shut up. 262 00:09:42,039 --> 00:09:44,542 Homer doesn't know anything about making movies. 263 00:09:44,625 --> 00:09:46,252 Don't sell your husband short, Mrs. Simpson. 264 00:09:46,335 --> 00:09:47,628 She's always doing that, Mel. 265 00:09:47,712 --> 00:09:49,964 -Oh... -Homer is a brutally honest man. 266 00:09:50,047 --> 00:09:52,008 Completely tactless and insensitive. 267 00:09:52,091 --> 00:09:53,759 (giggles) Guilty as charged. 268 00:09:53,843 --> 00:09:54,677 The problem I have is 269 00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:57,221 people love me so much, they never criticize me. 270 00:09:57,305 --> 00:09:59,932 I speed all the time, but cops never give me a ticket. 271 00:10:00,016 --> 00:10:01,392 If I don't pay my taxes, 272 00:10:01,475 --> 00:10:02,977 the IRS pays them for me. 273 00:10:03,060 --> 00:10:04,895 Oh, you poor thing. 274 00:10:04,979 --> 00:10:06,188 It's hell being Mel. 275 00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:08,399 (horn honking) 276 00:10:08,482 --> 00:10:09,609 Come on. Geez. 277 00:10:09,692 --> 00:10:10,985 I don't have much time, Homer. 278 00:10:11,068 --> 00:10:12,486 Will you come to Hollywood with me? 279 00:10:12,570 --> 00:10:15,031 (sniffs) You had me at "hello." 280 00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:16,574 I didn't say "hello." 281 00:10:19,827 --> 00:10:22,622 MARGE: Hollywood, here we come! 282 00:10:25,124 --> 00:10:28,044 Hollywood, here we are! 283 00:10:28,127 --> 00:10:29,378 LISA: Stop doing that, Mom. 284 00:10:32,840 --> 00:10:34,133 A mini-van. 285 00:10:34,216 --> 00:10:36,427 Oh, boy, you celebrities sure know how to live. 286 00:10:36,510 --> 00:10:38,429 What is this, Toyota Previa? 287 00:10:38,512 --> 00:10:39,597 Dodge Caravan. 288 00:10:39,680 --> 00:10:40,514 (whistles) 289 00:10:40,598 --> 00:10:41,641 Sweet. 290 00:10:41,724 --> 00:10:43,768 Look, they're making a movie! 291 00:10:43,851 --> 00:10:45,728 Robert Downey Jr. is shooting it out 292 00:10:45,811 --> 00:10:46,771 with the police. 293 00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:49,690 I don't see any cameras. 294 00:10:49,774 --> 00:10:51,067 Okay, while Mel and I are working, 295 00:10:51,150 --> 00:10:52,610 why don't you guys do the town? 296 00:10:52,693 --> 00:10:54,403 I hear all the stars eat at a place 297 00:10:54,487 --> 00:10:56,656 called Planet Hollywood. 298 00:10:56,739 --> 00:10:57,698 Can I stay with you, Dad? 299 00:10:57,782 --> 00:11:00,493 Sorry, son, but we're going to be very busy. 300 00:11:00,576 --> 00:11:02,620 Mel's movie really stinks. 301 00:11:03,954 --> 00:11:05,164 Okay, this opening scene 302 00:11:05,247 --> 00:11:06,791 should be in fast motion. 303 00:11:06,874 --> 00:11:08,876 Everybody likes that 'cause it looks funny. 304 00:11:09,460 --> 00:11:10,378 (talking in fast motion) Mr. Smith is coming to Washington. 305 00:11:10,461 --> 00:11:12,046 He's really honest, that could be bad news for us corrupt politicians. 306 00:11:12,129 --> 00:11:13,422 -Well, if he is, big deal. -How do you figure? 307 00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:15,091 If he doesn't play ball, we'll teach him a thing or two if you know what I mean. 308 00:11:15,174 --> 00:11:16,342 -Bye-bye. -See ya. 309 00:11:16,425 --> 00:11:17,760 (laughing) Look at that. 310 00:11:17,843 --> 00:11:18,678 I don't think so. 311 00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:20,846 Okay, here you need a musical montage 312 00:11:20,930 --> 00:11:23,140 where you try on lots of funny hats. 313 00:11:23,224 --> 00:11:24,892 It'll let us see your playful side. 314 00:11:24,975 --> 00:11:26,018 -No. Just no. -Yeah, but... 315 00:11:28,604 --> 00:11:31,273 {\an8}Uh, for those of you who have always wanted to see 316 00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:33,401 {\an8}the famous Brown Derby restaurant... 317 00:11:33,484 --> 00:11:35,444 -Oh. -...that's where it used to be. 318 00:11:37,446 --> 00:11:39,031 -Oh. -And on your left, 319 00:11:39,115 --> 00:11:41,367 is the notorious spot where Hugh Grant... 320 00:11:41,450 --> 00:11:42,743 -Hugh? -...filmed the movie 321 00:11:42,827 --> 00:11:44,578 -Nine Months. -Eww! 322 00:11:46,122 --> 00:11:49,083 You want me to replace the villain with a dog? 323 00:11:49,166 --> 00:11:50,501 I mean, nobody will know what's going on. 324 00:11:50,584 --> 00:11:53,337 They will if you set up that the dog is evil. 325 00:11:53,421 --> 00:11:55,131 All you have to do is show him doing this... 326 00:11:55,214 --> 00:11:58,634 (humming sinister tune) 327 00:11:58,718 --> 00:12:00,970 And people will suspect the dog. 328 00:12:01,345 --> 00:12:02,888 Maybe this wasn't a good idea, Homer. 329 00:12:03,305 --> 00:12:04,765 I'm sorry I dragged you out here. 330 00:12:04,849 --> 00:12:06,392 Let me pay your bus fare home. 331 00:12:06,475 --> 00:12:08,060 Uh-uh-uh, now, here's 332 00:12:08,144 --> 00:12:09,979 your biggest problem of all. 333 00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:11,063 The filibuster scene? 334 00:12:11,147 --> 00:12:12,648 That was Jimmy Stewart's favorite. 335 00:12:13,190 --> 00:12:15,401 And it was fine for the 1930s. 336 00:12:15,484 --> 00:12:17,611 The country was doing great back then. 337 00:12:17,695 --> 00:12:19,113 Everyone was into talking. 338 00:12:19,196 --> 00:12:21,574 But now, in whatever year this is, 339 00:12:21,657 --> 00:12:23,659 the audience wants action, 340 00:12:23,743 --> 00:12:25,619 and seats with beverage holders, 341 00:12:25,703 --> 00:12:27,163 but mainly action. 342 00:12:27,246 --> 00:12:28,581 You really think the end is boring? 343 00:12:28,664 --> 00:12:31,792 Oh, Mel, it's the most boring piece of garbage 344 00:12:31,876 --> 00:12:33,294 I've ever seen. 345 00:12:33,377 --> 00:12:35,254 And it's not easy for me to say that. 346 00:12:35,337 --> 00:12:37,173 Hmm, I guess it's a little flat. 347 00:12:37,256 --> 00:12:38,591 Okay, let's reshoot the ending. 348 00:12:38,674 --> 00:12:40,050 I'll call the hair and makeup ladies, 349 00:12:40,134 --> 00:12:41,635 you see if the teamsters will work for free. 350 00:12:41,719 --> 00:12:42,636 Piece of cake. 351 00:12:42,720 --> 00:12:44,889 Now, where's that kid with my latte? 352 00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:47,850 According to the map, 353 00:12:47,933 --> 00:12:48,976 this house is owned 354 00:12:49,059 --> 00:12:50,728 -by the dog from Frasier. -(dog barking) 355 00:12:50,811 --> 00:12:53,606 And that's where Ellen Degeneres and Anne Heche live. 356 00:12:54,982 --> 00:12:56,734 -We're lesbians! -We're lesbians! 357 00:12:56,817 --> 00:12:57,651 (dog barking) 358 00:13:01,572 --> 00:13:03,199 Okay, uh, this new ending... 359 00:13:03,282 --> 00:13:04,325 that we shot last night... 360 00:13:04,408 --> 00:13:05,785 is a little different than what we had, 361 00:13:05,868 --> 00:13:06,994 but I think you'll like it. 362 00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:08,370 It's missing some sound effects, 363 00:13:08,454 --> 00:13:10,414 and the computer guys haven't added the twinkle in my eye. 364 00:13:10,498 --> 00:13:13,167 Mel, you're coming off desperate. 365 00:13:13,250 --> 00:13:14,335 Roll it, Louie! 366 00:13:14,710 --> 00:13:16,295 (movie reel rolling) 367 00:13:17,421 --> 00:13:18,422 HOMER: Here comes two. 368 00:13:22,468 --> 00:13:24,470 Well, I'm not licked. 369 00:13:24,929 --> 00:13:26,514 And I'm going to stay right here 370 00:13:26,597 --> 00:13:28,432 and fight for this lost cause. 371 00:13:29,433 --> 00:13:30,935 Somebody will listen to me. 372 00:13:31,352 --> 00:13:32,186 Somebody will... 373 00:13:32,978 --> 00:13:34,063 (surprised murmurs) 374 00:13:34,563 --> 00:13:37,733 I believe the senator has yielded the floor. 375 00:13:37,817 --> 00:13:38,901 (all laughing) 376 00:13:41,237 --> 00:13:43,239 Yield this, Senator Payne. 377 00:13:43,322 --> 00:13:44,240 (grunts) 378 00:13:44,323 --> 00:13:45,658 (groans) 379 00:13:47,701 --> 00:13:49,161 -(chuckles) -(grunts) 380 00:13:51,080 --> 00:13:53,707 I move we impose some serious term limits. 381 00:13:53,791 --> 00:13:55,751 I second that motion... 382 00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:57,837 with a vengeance. 383 00:14:03,092 --> 00:14:05,219 All in favor, say "die." 384 00:14:05,302 --> 00:14:07,263 (imitating Curly) 385 00:14:07,930 --> 00:14:09,849 (people screaming) 386 00:14:13,477 --> 00:14:16,313 Mr. Smith, this is highly unorthodox. 387 00:14:18,524 --> 00:14:20,609 (people screaming) 388 00:14:26,156 --> 00:14:28,158 I'm the President of the United States 389 00:14:28,242 --> 00:14:30,369 and I demand to know what's going on here. 390 00:14:31,036 --> 00:14:31,871 (grunts) 391 00:14:32,746 --> 00:14:33,581 (screams) 392 00:14:36,667 --> 00:14:39,086 Happy birthday, Mr. President. 393 00:14:39,169 --> 00:14:41,380 (cheering) 394 00:14:52,641 --> 00:14:53,475 Pretty cool, huh? 395 00:14:53,809 --> 00:14:55,936 You, uh, you chopped off 396 00:14:56,020 --> 00:14:57,271 the president's head. 397 00:14:57,354 --> 00:14:58,606 Bet you didn't see that coming. 398 00:14:58,689 --> 00:15:00,691 You impaled a United States Senator 399 00:15:00,774 --> 00:15:01,901 with the American flag. 400 00:15:01,984 --> 00:15:04,111 Why did Mr. Smith kill everybody? 401 00:15:04,194 --> 00:15:05,863 It was symbolism. 402 00:15:05,946 --> 00:15:07,448 He was mad. 403 00:15:07,531 --> 00:15:10,159 But this was going to be the studio's prestige picture 404 00:15:10,242 --> 00:15:13,162 like Howard's End or Sophie's Choice. 405 00:15:13,245 --> 00:15:15,247 Eww, those movies sucked. 406 00:15:15,331 --> 00:15:17,833 I only saw them to get Marge into the sack. 407 00:15:17,917 --> 00:15:19,585 PS: Mission accomplished. 408 00:15:20,628 --> 00:15:23,422 But we've already bought five Golden Globe Awards. 409 00:15:23,505 --> 00:15:25,466 I don't make movies to win awards, 410 00:15:25,549 --> 00:15:27,760 especially now that I have two Oscars. 411 00:15:27,843 --> 00:15:29,345 I make movies for guys like him. 412 00:15:29,428 --> 00:15:32,181 -Yeah, guys like me. -Who are you anyway? 413 00:15:32,264 --> 00:15:34,350 Do the words "executive producer" 414 00:15:34,433 --> 00:15:35,517 mean anything to you? 415 00:15:35,601 --> 00:15:36,977 -Executive producer? -We'll talk. 416 00:15:37,061 --> 00:15:38,562 You've desecrated a classic film. 417 00:15:38,646 --> 00:15:40,272 This is worse than Godfather III. 418 00:15:40,356 --> 00:15:41,565 Whoa. Whoa, hey, whoa, 419 00:15:41,649 --> 00:15:43,192 let's not say things we can't take back. 420 00:15:43,275 --> 00:15:44,777 All right, all right, I'm sorry, 421 00:15:44,860 --> 00:15:46,111 but this film 422 00:15:46,195 --> 00:15:48,280 is never going to see the light of day. 423 00:15:48,364 --> 00:15:49,448 (both gasps) 424 00:15:50,491 --> 00:15:52,201 Look, they're towing away a range rover. 425 00:15:52,284 --> 00:15:53,160 (gasping) 426 00:15:54,161 --> 00:15:55,788 -WOMAN: There's no... -Yoink! Come on, Homer. 427 00:15:55,871 --> 00:15:56,830 We got a movie to premiere. 428 00:15:57,581 --> 00:15:58,999 -HOMER: Woo-hoo! -We've got to get that film back 429 00:15:59,083 --> 00:16:00,668 or we'll all be fired. You know what I mean? 430 00:16:00,751 --> 00:16:02,920 -Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fired. -Huh? Huh? Huh? 431 00:16:14,264 --> 00:16:15,891 -Give us the film! -Never. 432 00:16:16,642 --> 00:16:18,018 TOUR GUIDE: And on your left, 433 00:16:18,102 --> 00:16:19,770 you'll see Rainier Wolfcastle 434 00:16:19,853 --> 00:16:22,856 filming his latest movie, Saving Irene Ryan. 435 00:16:22,940 --> 00:16:25,734 You put me down, you big lummox! 436 00:16:25,818 --> 00:16:27,236 Jed! 437 00:16:27,319 --> 00:16:30,489 Shut up, old lady, and stop kicking me there. 438 00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:34,368 -Watch out! Coming through! -(people yelling) 439 00:16:34,451 --> 00:16:35,703 Move! 440 00:16:35,786 --> 00:16:37,496 Homer! Land mine! 441 00:16:37,579 --> 00:16:38,414 I'm on it. 442 00:16:39,999 --> 00:16:42,501 (both screaming) 443 00:16:42,584 --> 00:16:43,585 Good night, Mr. Gibson. 444 00:16:43,669 --> 00:16:44,503 Night, Gus. 445 00:16:45,212 --> 00:16:46,422 (both screaming) 446 00:16:47,715 --> 00:16:50,175 Oh, I'm getting too old for this crap. 447 00:16:50,259 --> 00:16:51,760 How old are you anyway? 448 00:16:51,844 --> 00:16:54,096 Well, I've been told I can play anywhere from 28 to-- 449 00:16:54,179 --> 00:16:55,139 Sorry I asked. 450 00:16:57,141 --> 00:16:58,851 Aw, crap, here they come. 451 00:16:58,934 --> 00:16:59,852 Well, that's it, Homer. 452 00:16:59,935 --> 00:17:01,645 We should have known better than to match wits 453 00:17:01,729 --> 00:17:02,938 with studio executives. 454 00:17:03,022 --> 00:17:06,233 Hey, come on, turn that down-under frown upside down. 455 00:17:06,316 --> 00:17:07,401 We're not finished yet. 456 00:17:12,448 --> 00:17:14,450 Wow, these dummies look pretty good. 457 00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:17,119 Well, I've had a lot of surgery, old chum. 458 00:17:17,202 --> 00:17:19,288 Shh. Mr. Limato said he'd fire us 459 00:17:19,371 --> 00:17:21,123 if you didn't stop bothering the customers. 460 00:17:23,500 --> 00:17:25,335 Homer, what are you doing here? 461 00:17:25,419 --> 00:17:26,837 No time talk. Need steal car. 462 00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:29,131 Must save powerful, but controversial movie. (gasp) 463 00:17:30,132 --> 00:17:31,633 (stammering) 464 00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:35,220 Hello. 465 00:17:35,637 --> 00:17:36,638 Quick, Mel, get in. 466 00:17:36,972 --> 00:17:38,432 (sighs) Forget it, Homer. 467 00:17:38,515 --> 00:17:40,184 Let's just give them the stupid movie. 468 00:17:40,267 --> 00:17:41,894 Movies aren't stupid. 469 00:17:41,977 --> 00:17:43,979 They fill us with romance and hatred 470 00:17:44,063 --> 00:17:45,689 and revenge fantasies. 471 00:17:46,023 --> 00:17:48,400 Lethal Weapon showed us that suicide is funny. 472 00:17:48,484 --> 00:17:50,235 That really wasn't my intention. 473 00:17:50,319 --> 00:17:52,279 Before Lethal Weapon 2, I never thought 474 00:17:52,362 --> 00:17:54,531 there could be a bomb in my toilet. 475 00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:57,284 But now I check every time. 476 00:17:57,701 --> 00:17:59,119 It's true. He does. 477 00:17:59,578 --> 00:18:01,497 Movies mean that much to you, Homer? 478 00:18:01,580 --> 00:18:03,165 They're my only escape 479 00:18:03,248 --> 00:18:05,918 from the drudgery of work and family. 480 00:18:07,503 --> 00:18:09,630 -No offense. -Oh, what the heck. 481 00:18:09,713 --> 00:18:10,589 Let's hit the road. 482 00:18:11,173 --> 00:18:12,508 Shove over, junior. 483 00:18:17,679 --> 00:18:19,348 That thoughtless destruction 484 00:18:19,431 --> 00:18:22,142 will surely bankrupt the museum, old chum. 485 00:18:22,226 --> 00:18:23,102 Shut up. 486 00:18:33,904 --> 00:18:35,948 Mom, you got to take my picture in this car 487 00:18:36,031 --> 00:18:37,074 so I can show Milhouse. 488 00:18:37,157 --> 00:18:38,117 Oh, sorry, honey. 489 00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:39,743 I used up the last roll on that man 490 00:18:39,827 --> 00:18:41,203 I thought was Judge Judy. 491 00:18:41,286 --> 00:18:42,496 Well, I think we lost them. 492 00:18:42,579 --> 00:18:43,539 -(car slamming) -(screams) 493 00:18:43,622 --> 00:18:45,040 Oh, wait. There they are. (grunts) 494 00:18:45,374 --> 00:18:47,543 Let me try something. Take the wheel, Lisa. 495 00:18:47,626 --> 00:18:49,086 -But my dad can-- -I said you. 496 00:18:50,420 --> 00:18:51,505 We've got them now. 497 00:18:54,174 --> 00:18:55,425 (screaming) 498 00:19:01,223 --> 00:19:03,433 Oh, no! We killed Mel Gibson! 499 00:19:03,517 --> 00:19:04,476 You all saw it. 500 00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:06,228 He came at me with a knife, right? 501 00:19:09,439 --> 00:19:11,066 Wait a minute. He's just a dummy. 502 00:19:11,150 --> 00:19:12,776 I know, but he sells tickets. 503 00:19:15,654 --> 00:19:16,572 Let's go. 504 00:19:19,199 --> 00:19:21,243 Oh, great idea, Mel. 505 00:19:21,326 --> 00:19:22,411 Now it's my turn. 506 00:19:24,580 --> 00:19:26,540 -What are you doing? -I'm tired of running away. 507 00:19:26,623 --> 00:19:28,041 Did Braveheart run away? 508 00:19:28,125 --> 00:19:29,960 Did Payback run away? 509 00:19:30,043 --> 00:19:32,087 It's time we showed those suits 510 00:19:32,171 --> 00:19:33,005 what we're made of. 511 00:19:35,424 --> 00:19:36,800 The heck is that? 512 00:19:37,634 --> 00:19:39,344 Well, the one on the left is Mel Gibson. 513 00:19:39,428 --> 00:19:40,929 I don't know who the other two guys are. 514 00:19:41,013 --> 00:19:42,931 Will you please tell me the rest of the plan? 515 00:19:43,015 --> 00:19:45,684 It's your plan from Braveheart. 516 00:19:45,767 --> 00:19:47,853 Your army mooned the enemy 517 00:19:47,936 --> 00:19:49,897 until they could take no more 518 00:19:49,980 --> 00:19:50,856 and surrendered. 519 00:19:50,939 --> 00:19:52,524 No. They didn't. They attacked us 520 00:19:52,608 --> 00:19:54,359 in a horribly bloody battle, remember? 521 00:19:54,443 --> 00:19:56,278 Actually, I didn't see it, but on the poster... 522 00:19:56,361 --> 00:19:57,196 Jump! 523 00:19:57,279 --> 00:19:58,822 (yelling) 524 00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:00,616 Homer, are you okay? 525 00:20:00,699 --> 00:20:01,783 I think so. 526 00:20:02,784 --> 00:20:03,619 No. 527 00:20:06,288 --> 00:20:08,248 MR. SMITH: All in favor, say, "die." 528 00:20:08,332 --> 00:20:09,791 (automatic gunfire) 529 00:20:10,459 --> 00:20:12,211 Ooh, that digital sound 530 00:20:12,294 --> 00:20:14,254 really lets you hear the blood splatter. 531 00:20:14,713 --> 00:20:15,714 I don't get it, Mel. 532 00:20:15,797 --> 00:20:17,507 How can you be so calm and cool? 533 00:20:17,591 --> 00:20:19,885 My stomach's full of vomiting butterflies. 534 00:20:20,469 --> 00:20:21,887 Okay, that's it. 535 00:20:21,970 --> 00:20:23,013 (hums) 536 00:20:23,096 --> 00:20:24,806 Let's get ready to meet our public. 537 00:20:24,890 --> 00:20:26,850 (people grumbling) 538 00:20:26,934 --> 00:20:28,518 Oh, well, that was disgusting. 539 00:20:28,852 --> 00:20:30,604 Worst ending ever. 540 00:20:31,021 --> 00:20:32,272 I think I'm going to be sick. 541 00:20:32,731 --> 00:20:34,358 I'm Jimmy Stewart's granddaughter, 542 00:20:34,441 --> 00:20:35,817 and you'll be hearing from my attorney. 543 00:20:35,901 --> 00:20:36,777 -D'oh. -Ow. 544 00:20:37,194 --> 00:20:39,196 Oh, we should have put in the dog 545 00:20:39,279 --> 00:20:40,697 with the shifty eyes. 546 00:20:41,323 --> 00:20:42,157 Oh! 547 00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:45,369 I'm sorry I ruined your career, Mel. 548 00:20:45,452 --> 00:20:46,703 It's not your fault, Homer. 549 00:20:46,787 --> 00:20:48,205 I guess there's just no room 550 00:20:48,288 --> 00:20:50,040 in today's crazy, gentle America 551 00:20:50,123 --> 00:20:52,251 for violent dinosaurs like us. 552 00:20:52,334 --> 00:20:55,003 How did the country lose its way, Mel? 553 00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:56,338 When did we stop rooting 554 00:20:56,421 --> 00:20:58,215 for the man with the flame thrower 555 00:20:58,298 --> 00:21:00,550 or an acid-spraying gun of some kind? 556 00:21:00,634 --> 00:21:03,262 I blame the internet and the return of swing music. 557 00:21:03,345 --> 00:21:04,346 Well, whatever it is, 558 00:21:04,429 --> 00:21:06,306 we got to get rolling on our next picture. 559 00:21:06,390 --> 00:21:08,558 Hey, what about a prequel or something? 560 00:21:08,642 --> 00:21:10,143 Everybody loves prequels. 561 00:21:10,227 --> 00:21:11,645 -I don't. -(grumbles) 562 00:21:12,104 --> 00:21:14,064 Okay, Mr. Difficult. 563 00:21:14,147 --> 00:21:15,774 How about a teen sex romp 564 00:21:15,857 --> 00:21:16,733 where you and your buddies 565 00:21:16,817 --> 00:21:18,610 are always trying to get some? 566 00:21:19,069 --> 00:21:22,447 No, wait. A ghost who wins the lottery! 567 00:21:22,781 --> 00:21:25,242 You could be the ghost or the lottery commissioner. 568 00:21:25,325 --> 00:21:28,328 Ooh! What about Indiana Jones? 569 00:21:28,412 --> 00:21:29,830 Does anyone own the rights to that? 570 00:21:29,913 --> 00:21:30,747 Ohh! 571 00:21:30,831 --> 00:21:33,083 Hey, Mel, I fell out! 572 00:21:42,342 --> 00:21:43,719 (dog barking) 573 00:21:45,929 --> 00:21:47,889 (theme music playing) 574 00:22:24,301 --> 00:22:25,927 -(murmuring) -Shh! 575 00:22:26,011 --> 00:22:28,096 (gibberish) 576 00:22:29,181 --> 00:22:31,058 {\an8}Captioned by Visual Data Media Services