1
00:00:03,253 --> 00:00:06,339
The Simpsons.

2
00:01:01,478 --> 00:01:02,895
Wow!

3
00:01:20,831 --> 00:01:22,623
The Wild Dingleberries?

4
00:01:22,708 --> 00:01:26,627
It's a movie version of a cartoon
family you can see for free on TV.

5
00:01:26,712 --> 00:01:28,963
But they stretched out the
plot and added a wildebeest

6
00:01:29,047 --> 00:01:30,047
from the hood!

7
00:01:30,132 --> 00:01:31,257
I am so there!

8
00:01:31,341 --> 00:01:33,926
Sorry, pally. The
Dingleberries are sold out.

9
00:01:34,178 --> 00:01:37,513
But looking at you, I'm sure your
kids are used to disappointment.

10
00:01:37,598 --> 00:01:39,599
How about Diet Coke:
The Movie? Sold out.

11
00:01:39,683 --> 00:01:40,827
President Air Bud:
Tail to the Chief?

12
00:01:40,851 --> 00:01:41,893
Sorry.

13
00:01:41,977 --> 00:01:43,936
My Big Fat Greek Salad?
Not a movie.

14
00:01:44,021 --> 00:01:46,606
The only movies starting
now are The Re-Deadening

15
00:01:46,690 --> 00:01:48,357
and Teenage Sex Wager.

16
00:01:48,484 --> 00:01:52,278
Ooh! Well, I am curious to see
if those teens lose their virginity.

17
00:01:52,362 --> 00:01:54,322
And the wager only
sweetens the deal.

18
00:01:54,406 --> 00:01:57,867
Mr. Simpson, that movie is
condemned by our church's movie guide.

19
00:02:00,704 --> 00:02:03,581
Refresh my memory. These
dweebs are with us, why?

20
00:02:03,665 --> 00:02:05,708
Because Mr. Flanders
volunteered to

21
00:02:05,793 --> 00:02:07,835
take the senior citizens
out for ice cream.

22
00:02:11,423 --> 00:02:13,216
This ice cream's too cold!

23
00:02:13,300 --> 00:02:15,426
Ow! I cut myself
on the cone!

24
00:02:16,595 --> 00:02:18,137
Now, now,
remember why we're here.

25
00:02:18,222 --> 00:02:20,556
To celebrate
Jasper's birthday.

26
00:02:22,226 --> 00:02:23,518
Birthday?

27
00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:30,483
Yo, yo, yo! Give it
up for M.C. Birthday!

28
00:02:30,567 --> 00:02:32,652
I say a birth, a day,
a birth-a-de-day.

29
00:02:32,736 --> 00:02:34,904
Now my good time gang
will blow you away.

30
00:02:37,574 --> 00:02:41,160
Never leave the day room.
Never leave the day room.

31
00:02:41,245 --> 00:02:43,246
Never leave the day room.

32
00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:44,872
Okay, kids.
Forget the movie.

33
00:02:44,957 --> 00:02:47,416
We'll just go to the
furniture store and sit down.

34
00:02:47,751 --> 00:02:49,252
Two for
The Re-Deadening, please.

35
00:02:50,420 --> 00:02:52,046
The Re-Deadening?
Is that any good?

36
00:02:52,130 --> 00:02:55,007
Good? I'm in it. I had
a small speaking role.

37
00:02:55,092 --> 00:02:57,844
Yeah. I went to visit him
and was banned from the set.

38
00:02:58,011 --> 00:02:59,971
Mr. Leonard, how
do you get in a movie?

39
00:03:00,055 --> 00:03:02,098
Ha! Classic Hollywood story.

40
00:03:02,307 --> 00:03:04,725
The director saw my photo
in a medical book.

41
00:03:04,852 --> 00:03:06,894
Hey, Lenny. Ls your film
appropriate for kids?

42
00:03:06,979 --> 00:03:08,896
Oh, yeah. There
are lots of kids in it.

43
00:03:08,981 --> 00:03:10,731
They fall victim
to a vicious...

44
00:03:10,816 --> 00:03:13,025
Don't ruin it for me!

45
00:03:13,110 --> 00:03:16,237
One adult and four children
for The Re-Deadening.

46
00:03:16,321 --> 00:03:23,244
La, la, la, la,
la, la, la.

47
00:03:24,371 --> 00:03:26,581
What's that,
Baby Button-Eyes?

48
00:03:26,707 --> 00:03:28,499
You want me to kill Mummy?

49
00:03:29,960 --> 00:03:32,545
But Mummy is ever so kind.

50
00:03:32,629 --> 00:03:33,796
What?

51
00:03:33,881 --> 00:03:37,717
Your buttons came from the
trousers of a psychotic killer?

52
00:03:38,468 --> 00:03:40,344
Then I have no choice.

53
00:03:46,476 --> 00:03:48,728
Hey, I paid for this popcorn,
and I'm eating it.

54
00:03:50,314 --> 00:03:53,065
Mr. Simpson, I'm scared.

55
00:03:54,318 --> 00:03:57,278
Relax, stupid.

56
00:03:57,362 --> 00:03:59,655
Everything you
see is make-believe.

57
00:03:59,740 --> 00:04:01,824
Although it is
based on a true story.

58
00:04:01,909 --> 00:04:04,827
Some of which happened
in this very theater.

59
00:04:08,582 --> 00:04:10,333
Oh, oh! Here comes my part!

60
00:04:13,795 --> 00:04:17,506
Baby Button-Eyes! What are
you doing possessed at this hour?

61
00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:19,342
I'd better tell
the governess...

62
00:04:20,677 --> 00:04:23,429
Oh! God! The prophecy
has been fulfilled!

63
00:04:29,436 --> 00:04:31,080
The buttons look like
they're sewn to my eyes.

64
00:04:31,104 --> 00:04:33,397
But they're really
held on with hot wax.

65
00:04:33,565 --> 00:04:35,608
Dad, I don't like
this movie.

66
00:04:35,692 --> 00:04:36,817
Can we go home?

67
00:04:36,902 --> 00:04:40,863
Oh, honey, don't be scared.
Look, they killed the evil doll.

68
00:04:44,868 --> 00:04:46,953
Well, what do you know?
It's unkillable.

69
00:04:48,372 --> 00:04:51,248
Honey, can Daddy rest
his soda on your head?

70
00:04:52,501 --> 00:04:54,043
That's my girl.

71
00:05:00,634 --> 00:05:03,511
You took little children
to The Re-Deadening?

72
00:05:03,595 --> 00:05:07,098
Homer, this is a rare lapse
in judgment for you.

73
00:05:07,474 --> 00:05:09,392
But scaring kids
is good for them.

74
00:05:09,476 --> 00:05:11,644
It hardens them
against future terrors,

75
00:05:11,728 --> 00:05:13,980
like roofing
and driveway scams.

76
00:05:14,940 --> 00:05:16,148
La, la, la, la...

77
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:21,153
Oh, sorry. I forgot I bought
the soundtrack album.

78
00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:24,907
Honey, I know you're scared.

79
00:05:24,992 --> 00:05:28,703
But there's no boogie woogies
or wooly bullies out there.

80
00:05:32,582 --> 00:05:34,709
Oh. Your nightlight's
burned out.

81
00:05:34,793 --> 00:05:37,545
And the only bulbs we
have left are these red ones.

82
00:05:44,886 --> 00:05:47,221
It was only a movie
filmed in Vancouver

83
00:05:47,305 --> 00:05:48,764
with Donald Sutherland
as the priest

84
00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:50,141
who stopped believing...

85
00:06:00,736 --> 00:06:04,780
Both of us heard mysterious
noises coming from this very spot.

86
00:06:05,407 --> 00:06:08,868
Bart and I will explore the
attic until we find their source.

87
00:06:11,413 --> 00:06:14,040
Must be the pipes.
What do you think, Bart?

88
00:06:14,124 --> 00:06:15,541
I think you're
on your own, toots!

89
00:06:17,377 --> 00:06:22,590
Okay. I'll just stay calm and
approach this scientifically.

90
00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:25,217
Oh, God! Oh, God!

91
00:06:25,302 --> 00:06:27,553
Oh, no!

92
00:06:27,637 --> 00:06:31,223
If I don't make it out alive,
I love you, Mom and Dad.

93
00:06:31,308 --> 00:06:33,225
Maggie, you can
have my books.

94
00:06:33,310 --> 00:06:37,354
And Bart, I'll see you in
hell, you booger-eating wuss!

95
00:06:37,439 --> 00:06:39,690
That's right! We all know!

96
00:06:40,817 --> 00:06:42,651
Ah! Bones!

97
00:06:46,698 --> 00:06:48,699
Copyright Pink
Pony Productions.

98
00:06:48,784 --> 00:06:50,743
Visit us on the web
at lisathemovie.com.

99
00:06:55,999 --> 00:06:59,085
Homie, that Kojak
is sexier than Cannon

100
00:06:59,169 --> 00:07:01,629
and Barnaby Jones
put together.

101
00:07:01,922 --> 00:07:04,673
I think he looks
a little like you.

102
00:07:04,883 --> 00:07:07,802
Who loves ya, baby?

103
00:07:09,554 --> 00:07:12,431
How about
a little interrogation?

104
00:07:12,849 --> 00:07:15,768
Okay. You have
the right to remain sexy.

105
00:07:15,852 --> 00:07:17,937
Anything you touch
can and will be

106
00:07:18,021 --> 00:07:19,980
held against you
in a court of sex.

107
00:07:20,065 --> 00:07:22,066
If you cannot
afford a sex-torney...

108
00:07:24,778 --> 00:07:27,279
Mom, Dad, there's a ghost
in the house!

109
00:07:27,364 --> 00:07:30,282
Good. Can you play with him
for half an hour?

110
00:07:31,952 --> 00:07:33,536
I don't see any ghosts.

111
00:07:33,912 --> 00:07:36,122
I did find this
Newsweek from 1986.

112
00:07:36,373 --> 00:07:38,165
Why America
loves Saddam Hussein.

113
00:07:41,545 --> 00:07:42,878
That's it!

114
00:07:43,004 --> 00:07:45,923
It's one thing for a ghost
to terrorize my children!

115
00:07:46,007 --> 00:07:49,009
But quite another for him
to play my theremin!

116
00:08:09,030 --> 00:08:10,406
Hello, Simpsons.

117
00:08:10,490 --> 00:08:12,032
Artie Ziff!

118
00:08:12,159 --> 00:08:13,492
None other!

119
00:08:13,577 --> 00:08:15,494
I've been hiding
in your attic

120
00:08:15,579 --> 00:08:18,539
living off the moisture
I can suck from the rafters!

121
00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:21,333
I thought we killed him!

122
00:08:21,418 --> 00:08:22,543
No, we didn't.

123
00:08:22,627 --> 00:08:25,337
But I did delete him from
my bulk e-mail list.

124
00:08:25,422 --> 00:08:27,256
No, you didn't.
That's right.

125
00:08:27,424 --> 00:08:29,008
Twice a week,
I get your e-mail

126
00:08:29,092 --> 00:08:30,676
of the monkey peeing
in his own mouth.

127
00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:32,469
Oh, yeah.

128
00:08:32,554 --> 00:08:35,472
That monkey got America
through some tough times.

129
00:08:41,938 --> 00:08:45,566
Artie Ziff! Why are
you living in our attic?

130
00:08:45,650 --> 00:08:46,942
Let me explain.

131
00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:49,111
I was an
lnternet billionaire.

132
00:08:49,279 --> 00:08:50,321
Say no more.

133
00:08:50,405 --> 00:08:52,781
I would stop,
but I love my voice.

134
00:08:53,950 --> 00:08:55,326
It was the go-go '90s.

135
00:09:00,707 --> 00:09:04,668
And I was partying with Newt
Gingrich, Janeane Garofalo

136
00:09:04,753 --> 00:09:06,212
and Scottie Pippen.

137
00:09:06,296 --> 00:09:08,505
Everyone loved my corporation.

138
00:09:10,175 --> 00:09:12,301
And then, the bubble burst.

139
00:09:13,929 --> 00:09:15,221
Wait! Don't go!

140
00:09:15,305 --> 00:09:18,474
My stock will have
a slight rebound in 2003.

141
00:09:18,642 --> 00:09:20,142
I had nothing.

142
00:09:28,026 --> 00:09:29,860
They even took my repo vans.

143
00:09:31,529 --> 00:09:33,072
I had nowhere to go.

144
00:09:33,156 --> 00:09:35,658
So I came here because
Marge is the closest thing

145
00:09:35,742 --> 00:09:37,284
I've ever had to true love.

146
00:09:37,369 --> 00:09:40,913
We had one date!
And you were not a gentleman!

147
00:09:43,500 --> 00:09:46,502
Don't worry. Lf you let me
stay, I'll be on my best behavior.

148
00:09:46,586 --> 00:09:49,338
Not even a fresh remark,
except this one.

149
00:09:49,464 --> 00:09:53,634
Wowie, wow, wow, wow!
Zazooga!

150
00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:56,637
Well, I don't know, Artie.

151
00:09:56,805 --> 00:10:00,182
Forgive me. I'm just so envious
of the happiness you all have.

152
00:10:00,684 --> 00:10:02,351
Can I please be part of it?

153
00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:04,645
Just till I get
back on my feet?

154
00:10:04,729 --> 00:10:07,815
No way! He's an annoying
sneak who's out to steal my wife!

155
00:10:08,024 --> 00:10:10,150
Come on, Dad. With his
brains and your musky smell,

156
00:10:10,235 --> 00:10:11,777
I've got a full
male role model.

157
00:10:11,861 --> 00:10:14,488
And it would be nice to have
someone here I can beat up.

158
00:10:14,572 --> 00:10:17,533
Ow! No fair! I'm telling.

159
00:10:19,536 --> 00:10:21,120
Okay, kids.
You can keep him.

160
00:10:21,204 --> 00:10:22,705
Yay!

161
00:10:24,416 --> 00:10:26,709
"When she pressed her
lips to his forehead

162
00:10:26,793 --> 00:10:29,044
"and walked out
with Denise and Gary

163
00:10:29,129 --> 00:10:30,921
"into the warm spring night,

164
00:10:31,089 --> 00:10:34,133
"she felt that nothing could
kill her hope now."

165
00:10:34,551 --> 00:10:35,551
Nothing!

166
00:10:35,885 --> 00:10:38,512
Ah. Thanks for
reading me The Corrections.

167
00:10:38,596 --> 00:10:41,015
It makes me feel better
about my own family.

168
00:10:41,224 --> 00:10:42,451
Doesn't your
father ever read to you?

169
00:10:42,475 --> 00:10:43,559
He tried once.

170
00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:46,228
But he got confused and
thought the book was real.

171
00:10:46,521 --> 00:10:48,814
He's still looking for
that chocolate factory.

172
00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:50,524
It consumes him.

173
00:10:53,778 --> 00:10:55,612
Hey, Mom, can I
sleep over at Milhouse's?

174
00:10:55,697 --> 00:10:57,573
I thought you were
playing catch with Artie.

175
00:10:57,699 --> 00:11:00,409
Yeah. But after the ice cream
man cut up his credit card,

176
00:11:00,535 --> 00:11:01,744
he got a little depressed.

177
00:11:04,289 --> 00:11:05,956
Oh, my!

178
00:11:06,124 --> 00:11:08,751
Well, Homer, maybe you should
take him to Moe's.

179
00:11:09,586 --> 00:11:10,794
Come on, little fella.

180
00:11:10,879 --> 00:11:12,755
You're hanging
with me tonight.

181
00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:19,762
Guys, I'd like you
to meet Artie Ziff.

182
00:11:19,971 --> 00:11:21,805
Hello, handsome!

183
00:11:21,973 --> 00:11:22,973
Hello!

184
00:11:23,058 --> 00:11:24,058
Losers.

185
00:11:24,768 --> 00:11:27,269
Coming up.
Can yodeling cure cancer?

186
00:11:27,771 --> 00:11:30,272
Of course not. But first,
where is Artie Ziff?

187
00:11:31,441 --> 00:11:33,817
The SEC wants to know.

188
00:11:34,069 --> 00:11:37,154
It seems Ziff Corp. Spent
stockholders' money on everything

189
00:11:37,238 --> 00:11:38,989
from marble toothbrushes

190
00:11:39,074 --> 00:11:40,532
to solid gold underpants.

191
00:11:43,119 --> 00:11:45,662
Small investors
have been wiped out.

192
00:11:45,789 --> 00:11:48,290
I lost all me
"screw you" money.

193
00:11:48,375 --> 00:11:50,459
I'm very sorry to
hear that, Willie.

194
00:11:50,543 --> 00:11:51,543
Screw you!

195
00:11:51,628 --> 00:11:53,003
Authorities are
currently operating

196
00:11:53,088 --> 00:11:54,482
under the theory
that Ziff is living

197
00:11:54,506 --> 00:11:56,298
in a cave somewhere.

198
00:11:58,218 --> 00:11:59,385
He's not in here, Chief.

199
00:11:59,469 --> 00:12:01,095
That's some good
spelunking, Lou.

200
00:12:01,262 --> 00:12:03,180
Mighty fine spelunking.

201
00:12:08,436 --> 00:12:09,978
Okay, read 'em and weep.

202
00:12:10,105 --> 00:12:11,438
I don't know why I'm losing.

203
00:12:11,523 --> 00:12:13,941
Maybe I have
some kind of "tell."

204
00:12:14,234 --> 00:12:17,152
Hot mamma,
I'm living in flushtown!

205
00:12:17,404 --> 00:12:19,405
Population Artie!

206
00:12:21,282 --> 00:12:23,492
Uh, I guess I'm in
for 50 cents.

207
00:12:23,785 --> 00:12:24,785
I fold.
Me, too.

208
00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:26,078
I'm out.
I'm done.

209
00:12:26,162 --> 00:12:30,916
I'll see your
50 cents and raise you $1.

210
00:12:31,000 --> 00:12:32,000
Whoa!

211
00:12:34,796 --> 00:12:36,004
Well, I'm out of cash.

212
00:12:36,089 --> 00:12:37,881
But would you accept 98%

213
00:12:37,966 --> 00:12:39,766
of the outstanding shares
of Ziff Corp. Stock?

214
00:12:39,801 --> 00:12:41,844
And the peanuts
in your mouth.

215
00:12:41,928 --> 00:12:42,928
Very well.

216
00:12:44,722 --> 00:12:46,140
All of them.

217
00:12:47,851 --> 00:12:49,852
Flush. What have you got?

218
00:12:50,186 --> 00:12:51,520
Four Jacks.

219
00:12:56,025 --> 00:12:59,486
Check it out. I own a
multinational corporation.

220
00:13:01,531 --> 00:13:04,241
I always knew
someday I'd be a C.O. D.

221
00:13:06,077 --> 00:13:08,454
Freeze! Securities and
Exchange Commission!

222
00:13:09,247 --> 00:13:12,958
Artie Ziff, you're wanted for stock
manipulation and securities fraud.

223
00:13:13,042 --> 00:13:15,836
It's scum like you that
undermine investor confidence.

224
00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:18,672
Investor confidence?
Perhaps this affects me?

225
00:13:18,840 --> 00:13:21,717
I own 230 million
shares of Ziff Corp. Stock.

226
00:13:21,843 --> 00:13:23,635
You're
the majority shareholder?

227
00:13:23,845 --> 00:13:26,972
I sure am. With all the
inherent legal liabilities.

228
00:13:28,183 --> 00:13:29,863
Hey, what are you...
You're under arrest.

229
00:13:29,893 --> 00:13:31,727
Wait a minute.
How can you arrest Homer?

230
00:13:31,811 --> 00:13:34,980
This guy's the one what done
the thing that why you're here for.

231
00:13:35,064 --> 00:13:37,316
I'm talking malfeasance here.

232
00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:38,984
All right. I admit it.

233
00:13:39,068 --> 00:13:41,320
I did run Ziff Corp.
Into the ground.

234
00:13:41,404 --> 00:13:45,407
And this man took me into his
home when no one else would.

235
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:48,660
And now as the result of
his brilliant card playing,

236
00:13:48,745 --> 00:13:49,828
he's the one you want!

237
00:13:50,997 --> 00:13:52,831
Tape his mouth so
he can't deny it!

238
00:13:53,249 --> 00:13:55,292
Don't tell my kids
I'm going to jail!

239
00:13:55,376 --> 00:13:57,211
Tell them I joined
the Blue Man Group!

240
00:13:57,295 --> 00:13:58,921
I'm the fat one!

241
00:14:06,554 --> 00:14:07,554
Homer Simpson,

242
00:14:07,597 --> 00:14:09,181
how do you respond
to the charge that

243
00:14:09,265 --> 00:14:11,600
your company has
betrayed the public trust?

244
00:14:13,269 --> 00:14:14,509
Plead the Fifth Amend...
What?

245
00:14:15,730 --> 00:14:17,610
Refuse to answer on
the grounds that I... What?

246
00:14:18,691 --> 00:14:20,442
Inseminate myself?

247
00:14:20,777 --> 00:14:24,446
Dudes, I think this
guy's coming on to me.

248
00:14:24,531 --> 00:14:26,031
You, sir, are a moron!

249
00:14:26,115 --> 00:14:28,075
A Mormon?
But I'm from earth!

250
00:14:28,284 --> 00:14:30,077
Oh, for heaven sakes!

251
00:14:30,453 --> 00:14:32,788
Your majesty,
can I go home now?

252
00:14:32,914 --> 00:14:36,625
Your company's crimes have
left a scar on this great nation.

253
00:14:36,751 --> 00:14:39,044
And she was so beautiful.

254
00:14:39,128 --> 00:14:41,213
But what man
would want her now?

255
00:14:41,297 --> 00:14:43,137
- I wouldn't want her...
- Yeah, she was hot.

256
00:14:44,133 --> 00:14:47,386
My husband's going to jail,
and it's all your fault!

257
00:14:47,470 --> 00:14:50,013
Do you know why
no one likes you?

258
00:14:50,181 --> 00:14:51,348
Anti-Semitism?

259
00:14:51,474 --> 00:14:52,683
No!

260
00:14:52,767 --> 00:14:56,353
Your problem is you never
think of anyone besides yourself.

261
00:14:56,437 --> 00:14:59,815
Marge, I think about a
lot more than just moi.

262
00:15:00,316 --> 00:15:02,067
Artie, Artie, Artie, Artie.

263
00:15:02,151 --> 00:15:04,570
Artie, Artie,
Artie, Artie.

264
00:15:06,322 --> 00:15:08,907
Oh, my God.

265
00:15:08,992 --> 00:15:10,409
She's right.

266
00:15:15,832 --> 00:15:18,333
I never want you
in this house again!

267
00:15:18,585 --> 00:15:21,044
If he's out,
can I move back in?

268
00:15:21,170 --> 00:15:22,462
What do you think?

269
00:15:22,672 --> 00:15:24,590
And she's the nice one.

270
00:15:32,849 --> 00:15:34,099
Okay, kids.

271
00:15:34,183 --> 00:15:37,686
This book should help you
deal with your feelings.

272
00:15:38,021 --> 00:15:40,063
Look, Maggie. It's a pop-up.

273
00:15:40,148 --> 00:15:41,732
"Daddy's made a shiv.

274
00:15:41,816 --> 00:15:45,527
"Can you help him ice Johnny
Shakes, the jailhouse stoolie?"

275
00:15:48,906 --> 00:15:50,407
Hey, let me read it to her.

276
00:15:50,533 --> 00:15:54,244
"Johnny's friends get some payback
on Daddy while he's sleeping."

277
00:15:54,412 --> 00:15:58,790
Daddy's on fire.
Daddy's not on fire.

278
00:15:58,875 --> 00:16:00,125
Daddy's on fire...

279
00:16:00,209 --> 00:16:01,376
Daddy's not on fire!

280
00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:04,838
Okay, fine. He is.

281
00:16:06,883 --> 00:16:08,759
I miss you guys so much.

282
00:16:08,843 --> 00:16:10,719
The smell of
Marge's pork chops.

283
00:16:10,845 --> 00:16:14,222
The way you kids kiss
my owies when I go boom.

284
00:16:14,390 --> 00:16:19,561
This place has become
like a prison to me!

285
00:16:19,729 --> 00:16:21,938
Hey, Dad. Maybe
this will cheer you up.

286
00:16:22,023 --> 00:16:27,361
Why you little...

287
00:16:28,279 --> 00:16:30,530
Aw. It's no use, son.

288
00:16:30,615 --> 00:16:33,075
By the time I get out
of here, you'll be grown.

289
00:16:33,409 --> 00:16:36,036
Turn around, turn around.

290
00:16:36,245 --> 00:16:39,581
Turn around
and you're a young man.

291
00:16:40,291 --> 00:16:44,628
And you're too big to choke.

292
00:16:50,468 --> 00:16:53,345
Well, well,
look who showed his face.

293
00:16:53,596 --> 00:16:56,056
The louse who
sold out his only friend.

294
00:16:56,140 --> 00:16:58,684
You've got a lot
of nerve coming here.

295
00:16:58,768 --> 00:17:01,937
But since you did, what'll it
be? First one's on the house.

296
00:17:02,480 --> 00:17:06,024
Is this dump open? We were
jogging and ran out of cigarettes.

297
00:17:06,109 --> 00:17:07,401
Pardon me for intruding.

298
00:17:07,485 --> 00:17:10,612
But I believe teenage
girls shouldn't smoke.

299
00:17:18,663 --> 00:17:20,122
Are you still
living with Marge?

300
00:17:20,206 --> 00:17:21,415
No.

301
00:17:21,499 --> 00:17:24,209
She kicked me out for sending
her husband to prison.

302
00:17:24,293 --> 00:17:27,838
You put Homer in jail?

303
00:17:28,005 --> 00:17:31,258
The hair is standing up
on the back of my knees.

304
00:17:31,342 --> 00:17:33,218
Keep your Odor-Eaters
on, Selma.

305
00:17:33,302 --> 00:17:35,178
I've seen you get
hurt too many times.

306
00:17:35,263 --> 00:17:38,098
I'm not gonna let him into
my heart or my bedroom.

307
00:17:38,182 --> 00:17:41,393
Just 10 minutes on the
beanbag. Come on, Short Round.

308
00:17:41,477 --> 00:17:43,895
We're going back
to my temple of doom.

309
00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:45,814
Be gentle!

310
00:17:47,316 --> 00:17:48,734
You know,

311
00:17:48,818 --> 00:17:52,446
they say that the love of a
good woman can save any man.

312
00:17:52,530 --> 00:17:53,989
Except you, freak!

313
00:17:54,198 --> 00:17:56,783
Well, if you change your
mind, you know where I am.

314
00:17:56,868 --> 00:17:58,577
In my nightmares!

315
00:17:58,911 --> 00:18:00,662
I'm gonna stop now.

316
00:18:06,502 --> 00:18:08,003
What the hell
are you doing?

317
00:18:08,087 --> 00:18:09,796
I can't get my socks off.

318
00:18:09,922 --> 00:18:13,884
Ah, leave 'em on. I like a
man with a little mystery.

319
00:18:15,136 --> 00:18:16,136
I'm done.

320
00:18:16,179 --> 00:18:17,888
My kinda man.

321
00:18:19,432 --> 00:18:22,350
Wonderful,
glorious, magnificent.

322
00:18:23,019 --> 00:18:24,561
And you were
pretty good, too.

323
00:18:30,276 --> 00:18:32,944
Selma, you've made
a new man of me.

324
00:18:33,362 --> 00:18:34,946
Thanks to your angry love,

325
00:18:35,031 --> 00:18:37,282
I can no longer
sit by selfishly while

326
00:18:37,366 --> 00:18:39,618
another suffers
for my book cooking.

327
00:18:39,786 --> 00:18:40,786
What are you gonna do?

328
00:18:40,870 --> 00:18:43,455
First,
I'm gonna read the paper,

329
00:18:43,539 --> 00:18:44,539
have a little nosh.

330
00:18:44,665 --> 00:18:45,665
And then,

331
00:18:45,750 --> 00:18:47,459
I'm gonna rinse out
a few things.

332
00:18:47,543 --> 00:18:49,795
And then, finally,

333
00:18:49,879 --> 00:18:52,547
I will get an innocent
man out of jail.

334
00:18:53,966 --> 00:18:57,469
Well, he can't break my heart,
'cause he kind of makes me sick.

335
00:18:57,553 --> 00:18:58,678
This could work.

336
00:18:58,846 --> 00:19:00,972
Artie Ziff shocked
investigators today

337
00:19:01,057 --> 00:19:03,183
by turning over
a second set of books

338
00:19:03,434 --> 00:19:05,727
detailing his own
financial culpability

339
00:19:05,812 --> 00:19:08,814
and exonerating stumbling,
bumbling boob Homer Simpson.

340
00:19:08,898 --> 00:19:11,691
Simpson's grateful family
had this to say.

341
00:19:11,776 --> 00:19:14,611
I'm so happy to be getting
my husband back.

342
00:19:14,821 --> 00:19:19,157
And I'm happy to listen to FM
95.3, home of Boomer and the Diz!

343
00:19:19,242 --> 00:19:20,742
Bart!
Chill out, Mom.

344
00:19:20,827 --> 00:19:21,827
They gave me this hat.

345
00:19:26,666 --> 00:19:28,959
Sorry you were wrongfully
imprisoned, Simpson.

346
00:19:29,043 --> 00:19:31,294
Can I apply my time
toward a future crime?

347
00:19:31,379 --> 00:19:33,922
You can either steal a car
or kick me in the crotch.

348
00:19:34,090 --> 00:19:37,050
No one
ever chooses the car.

349
00:19:37,593 --> 00:19:39,052
Oh, Dad!

350
00:19:39,262 --> 00:19:43,223
Mmm. I missed you so much!

351
00:19:43,307 --> 00:19:46,226
Oh, my God!
Maggie, you're talking!

352
00:19:46,519 --> 00:19:48,270
Homer, I believe
that's Lisa.

353
00:19:48,521 --> 00:19:51,565
Oh, Bart,
what a man you've become.

354
00:19:51,774 --> 00:19:54,860
Artie, thank you for
doing the right thing,

355
00:19:55,111 --> 00:19:56,528
eventually.

356
00:19:56,612 --> 00:19:59,739
All I needed was
the love of a good woman.

357
00:20:00,241 --> 00:20:03,785
And since you're
not interested...

358
00:20:03,953 --> 00:20:04,995
I'm not!

359
00:20:05,079 --> 00:20:06,204
Merely checking.

360
00:20:06,289 --> 00:20:08,123
Because I'm into that.

361
00:20:08,291 --> 00:20:10,208
I'll visit you
in two weeks.

362
00:20:18,634 --> 00:20:21,386
I have to admit,
I'll miss having him around.

363
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:25,724
I don't think we've seen
the last of Artie Ziff.

364
00:20:26,517 --> 00:20:29,728
Yo, hobbit.
I'm like your roommate.

365
00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:33,106
Oh, a smoker, eh?

366
00:20:33,190 --> 00:20:35,066
Well, I have ways
of dealing with you.

367
00:20:35,151 --> 00:20:37,235
Squirt, squirt, squirt.

368
00:20:37,320 --> 00:20:39,404
Your lungs will thank me.

369
00:20:40,364 --> 00:20:43,658
Kids, you better take your
last look at Uncle Artie.

370
00:20:43,910 --> 00:20:45,827
Oh, look!
There's a whole bunch of you!

371
00:20:46,412 --> 00:20:48,580
Squirt, squirt, squirt!

372
00:20:48,664 --> 00:20:50,707
That's it. Circle around me.

373
00:20:50,791 --> 00:20:52,853
Squirt, squirt, squirt,
squirt, squirt, squirt, squirt.

374
00:20:52,877 --> 00:20:54,920
Oh, I'm gonna
need more water.

375
00:21:47,723 --> 00:21:48,723
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