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{\an8}-CHOIR: ♪ The Simpsons ♪
-Whoa, look out.
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00:00:04,713 --> 00:00:06,214
{\an8}(both shout)
3
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(theme music playing)
4
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Hey, where's our sailboat?
5
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Oh. It really tied the room together.
6
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Yes. That painting was great.
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Derivative, amateur seascape.
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Maybe another animated show stole it!
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(gasps) We'll see about that!
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Or maybe I sold it on Craigslist.
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Both things are equally possible.
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This a TV show,
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or did I walk into
a third grade shoebox diorama?
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Did you steal my painting?
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(angry muttering, bleeping)
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(chuckles)
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Out of the mouths of babes.
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♪ We're in the cookies you hate to eat ♪
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♪ An unpleasant surprise
when you trick-or-treat... ♪
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Boo! Boo!
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Snacks should be bad for you!
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(high-pitched yells)
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(grunting)
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-(screams)
-(screams)
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Ew, what smells like comic books
and loneliness?
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-(gasps)
-Oh, uh, certainly not this cool cat.
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Nope. That was spot-on.
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But today I don't care.
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-Look what I got!
-My painting!
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The pièce de résistance
of my memorabilia collection!
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Not since I was the winning bidder
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on a Ziploc full of
Jonathan Frakes' beard trimmings
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have I been so-- Aw, dang it.
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Ooh! Gross! Raisin blood!
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-(Homer grunting)
-(kids yelling)
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(panting)
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Oh, I did it.
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Oh, (bleep).
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♪ ♪
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{\an8}Bart and I haven't always been
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{\an8}-the best of friends.
-Ah!
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{\an8}And we're here
to tell you a story of a time
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{\an8}-when we reallydidn't get along.
-Oh-oh-oh-oh!
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{\an8}But we found our way!
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{\an8}-And we like each other better than ever!
-(exclaims)
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{\an8}Way to spoil the ending, nerd-burger.
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{\an8}Mmm, nerd-burger.
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{\an8}It all began
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{\an8}-on the hottest summer on record.
-Ah!
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{\an8}After years of pollution
in Springfield Bay,
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{\an8}I am honored to announce
that these waters
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{\an8}are now safe to swim in.
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{\an8}(cheering)
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{\an8}Huzzah for a cleaner Springfield!
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{\an8}Er, uh, it's not cleaner.
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{\an8}We just lowered the safety standards.
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{\an8}(cheering)
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{\an8}Yay!
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{\an8}(sizzling)
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{\an8}Okay, who's up for a day at the beach?
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{\an8}I got all the beach I want
with Anzio Beach Invasion.
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{\an8}Pathetic! I was there,
and it was nothing like that.
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{\an8}(Grampa gasps) I surrender!
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{\an8}I'll go in first
so they won't know it's a trap.
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{\an8}Yoink. Yoink.
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{\an8}Movado!
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{\an8}(humming)
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{\an8}(laughter)
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{\an8}(Homer whimpering)
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{\an8}Well, that is the most disgusting thing
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{\an8}I've ever seen on a beach.
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{\an8}Kind of sad, really.
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{\an8}(sighs)
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{\an8}A booger?
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{\an8}-Real mature, guys, real mature.
-(both snickering)
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{\an8}A booger!
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{\an8}A human booger, indeed.
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Dolphin. Weak.
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Skull. Cliché.
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"I'd rather be fishing." Not true.
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The bone?
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That's exactly what I'm bad to.
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{\an8}Hmm.
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{\an8}(gasps)
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{\an8}♪ Wouldn't it be nice
if we were older? ♪
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{\an8}♪ Then we wouldn't
have to wait so long ♪
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{\an8}♪ And wouldn't it be nice
to live together ♪
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{\an8}♪ In the kind of world
where we belong? ♪
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{\an8}♪ You know it's gonna make it
that much better... ♪
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{\an8}(gasps) I'll take it!
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{\an8}(pacifier squeaking)
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{\an8}Geronimo!
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{\an8}It said "water-resistant."
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{\an8}It resisted nothing!
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{\an8}Whee!
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{\an8}Whoa! Dope hat!
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{\an8}And check out my gnarly new tat!
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No fair! I'm bad to the bone!
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(sobbing)
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(women grunting)
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-Mmm!
-Okay, that's it.
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Marge, I'm watching sports!
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Really? What's the score?
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00:04:44,367 --> 00:04:47,412
Uh, the, uh, Boobs are beating the Butts.
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I don't think
that's the official terminology.
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(grunts)
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Oh!
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00:04:52,709 --> 00:04:55,920
Maybe you should watch
this sport instead.
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Hmm. Mm-mm-mm.
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What do you know?
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Checkmate. Ha!
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It's the only mate I haven't buried.
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Hey, Blobby Fischer, you're up.
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Do you even know the names of the pieces?
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Of course. There's the King,
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Mrs. King, the Lightbulb Babies,
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the Mini Ashtray, Slit Face.
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And who could forget Dr. Horse?
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Want to put a 20 on it?
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Make it a 22.
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(chuckles)
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Checkmate.
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(chuckles)
Another victim of the Budapest Gambit.
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How can Dad play chess?
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He can't even remember the rules
to Chutes and Ladders.
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I do so!
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You always think ladders go down.
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You can go down a ladder.
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Oh, God, not this again.
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-HOMER: I go down ladders all the time.
-Homer, when did you learn to play chess?
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The truth is, my dad and I used to play.
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(Mozart's "Requiem" playing)
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(ticking)
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He won't stop doing it.
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That's jive, man.
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But I don't want to talk about it.
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(Mozart's "Requiem" playing)
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Whoa! Sweet lid, Lisa.
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Well, I'm bad to the bone.
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I see no proof of that.
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Oh, yeah? Just look at this.
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-(grunts)
-(screeches)
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-(shouting)
-Haw haw!
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Bart's getting beat up by a beach turkey!
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(sighs)
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(groans)
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Hmm.
148
00:06:42,402 --> 00:06:43,903
Okay, a few ground rules.
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Everything I say, I want five of.
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Five Krusty Burgers...
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SQUEAKY-VOICED TEEN:
Got it. Five Krusty Burgers.
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No! I thought I was clear.
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25 Krusty Burgers!
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125 Krusty Burgers?
155
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No! That's not what I... Fine.
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BART: (thinking) Can I really toss
this thing she's so crazy about?
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Damn right I can! I'm bad to the bone!
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(grunts)
159
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(growling)
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(chuckles)
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-Who the hell are you?
-I'm your guilt.
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-I don't have any guilt.
-You do now.
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Don't worry, Bart. I'll protect you.
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I'm denial.
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(crack)
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Ay, caramba!
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♪ Wouldn't it be nice
if we were older? ♪
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♪ Then we wouldn't
have to wait so long? ♪
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(gasps) My hat!
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♪ ♪
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Sunny?
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00:07:53,723 --> 00:07:56,058
♪ ♪
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Uh, no.
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Uh-uh.
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Oh.
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00:08:14,535 --> 00:08:16,412
(gasps) No.
177
00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:17,997
Nope.
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Not even close.
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Do you have any more yellow hats?
180
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You mean like the one
you looked really good in?
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00:08:30,635 --> 00:08:32,470
-Yes.
-No.
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Oh...
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(groaning)
184
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(groans) You're still here?
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00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:42,980
No offense, but you look worse.
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Your lack of remorse just makes me grow.
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-(gasps)
-Now you're gettin' it.
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Ha! Joke's on you-- I like gross things.
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Hmm.
190
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(grunting)
191
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(laughs) Again! Again!
192
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{\an8}And that leads to mate in three!
193
00:09:05,586 --> 00:09:08,005
{\an8}I've got to say, it's so exciting
194
00:09:08,089 --> 00:09:10,424
{\an8}to find out something new about you.
195
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{\an8}Hey, I'm full of surprises.
196
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{\an8}Ooh. Name another.
197
00:09:14,554 --> 00:09:15,721
Actually, that's it.
198
00:09:15,805 --> 00:09:18,140
Tell me something I don't know about you.
199
00:09:18,224 --> 00:09:20,142
Okay.
200
00:09:20,226 --> 00:09:21,561
Sometimes when I sweep,
201
00:09:21,644 --> 00:09:24,188
I make little sweeping noises
with my mouth.
202
00:09:24,272 --> 00:09:25,940
(whooshing)
203
00:09:26,023 --> 00:09:29,360
Oh, here comes the dustpan.
204
00:09:29,443 --> 00:09:32,238
-(gasps)
-(both moaning)
205
00:09:32,321 --> 00:09:34,699
I can't find Sunny anywhere.
206
00:09:34,782 --> 00:09:37,326
Sunny? No! We got to find Sunny!
207
00:09:37,410 --> 00:09:40,037
Where-- Wait.
The baby's name is Maggie.
208
00:09:43,874 --> 00:09:46,627
Hey, beach bums.
Man, did I crash last night.
209
00:09:46,711 --> 00:09:49,213
Always sleep well after riding the waves.
210
00:09:49,297 --> 00:09:51,299
Ah...
211
00:09:51,382 --> 00:09:54,093
Have you seen your sister's hat?
212
00:09:54,176 --> 00:09:58,306
Oh, did-did she have a hat?
I-I don't remember any hat.
213
00:09:58,389 --> 00:09:59,640
Her name was Sunny,
214
00:09:59,724 --> 00:10:02,727
and I loved her more
than any girl ever loved a hat!
215
00:10:02,810 --> 00:10:05,938
(gasps)
Even Madeline from the Madeline books?
216
00:10:06,022 --> 00:10:09,900
She only wore that because
it was part of her uniform.
217
00:10:09,984 --> 00:10:11,569
Ask Pepito.
218
00:10:13,321 --> 00:10:15,031
Mmm.
219
00:10:17,283 --> 00:10:20,870
Hey, hey, hey, I do not like to see
that going on in my bar.
220
00:10:23,706 --> 00:10:25,666
{\an8}Lenny, knight takes queen.
221
00:10:25,750 --> 00:10:27,543
{\an8}Barney, mate in four.
222
00:10:27,627 --> 00:10:30,129
{\an8}Homer!
You're playing like Polugaevsky
223
00:10:30,212 --> 00:10:32,715
{\an8}at Mar del Plata. (belches)
224
00:10:32,798 --> 00:10:35,718
Yeah, Homer,
you're some kind of an idiot savant.
225
00:10:35,801 --> 00:10:37,887
Hey, I don't come here to be insulted.
226
00:10:37,970 --> 00:10:40,348
Homer, we're just saying
youse got a special skill,
227
00:10:40,431 --> 00:10:43,684
like a smokin' monkey
or a urinal cake with an ad on it.
228
00:10:43,768 --> 00:10:46,228
Don't tell me you're not flattered
by those analogies.
229
00:10:47,104 --> 00:10:49,231
(sputters)
You guys think you're so hot.
230
00:10:49,315 --> 00:10:51,317
I could fit in a piece
of carry-on luggage.
231
00:10:51,400 --> 00:10:53,402
Oh-ho, I'd like to see that.
232
00:10:57,406 --> 00:10:59,659
{\an8}Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
233
00:11:00,868 --> 00:11:03,204
{\an8}Oh, no. I'm alone with my thoughts.
234
00:11:03,287 --> 00:11:04,372
{\an8}No. No, no, no.
235
00:11:04,455 --> 00:11:06,666
{\an8}The healthiest thing
is for me to let myself out.
236
00:11:06,749 --> 00:11:08,417
{\an8}Oh, sure thing, pal.
237
00:11:10,044 --> 00:11:11,879
Here you go.
238
00:11:13,881 --> 00:11:16,008
So, Homer, how did you
get so good at chess?
239
00:11:16,092 --> 00:11:17,718
I played against my dad.
240
00:11:17,802 --> 00:11:19,345
Uh, was that fun?
241
00:11:22,431 --> 00:11:25,226
It was, until I learned
the pieces weren't licorice.
242
00:11:25,309 --> 00:11:26,811
(Mozart's "Requiem" playing)
243
00:11:26,894 --> 00:11:29,522
HOMER: We played every day
after my mother left us,
244
00:11:29,605 --> 00:11:31,232
and he won every time.
245
00:11:31,315 --> 00:11:34,902
And every time he won,
he laughed that horrible laugh.
246
00:11:34,985 --> 00:11:36,737
(laughing)
247
00:11:36,821 --> 00:11:38,322
Aw, Mona.
248
00:11:38,406 --> 00:11:40,241
(laughing)
249
00:11:42,410 --> 00:11:45,079
HOMER:
So I found a professor who lived nearby,
250
00:11:45,162 --> 00:11:47,998
a master of the game, kind, patient,
251
00:11:48,082 --> 00:11:49,583
devoted to me.
252
00:11:49,667 --> 00:11:52,086
I went every day.
253
00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:55,840
You are ready now.
254
00:11:55,923 --> 00:11:57,800
Thanks for the lessons, Professor.
255
00:11:57,883 --> 00:12:01,095
You remind me of my son.
256
00:12:01,178 --> 00:12:04,014
-Oh. Where is he now?
-He's...
257
00:12:04,098 --> 00:12:05,391
right over there.
258
00:12:05,474 --> 00:12:07,727
He just doesn't like chess.
259
00:12:08,894 --> 00:12:11,647
HOMER: I went back to play my dad.
260
00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:13,607
We had a beautiful thing here,
261
00:12:13,691 --> 00:12:16,026
and you had to ruin it by getting good!
262
00:12:16,110 --> 00:12:17,737
No more chess in this house!
263
00:12:17,820 --> 00:12:19,447
But, Dad, it's our thing.
264
00:12:19,530 --> 00:12:20,990
Well, we'll find another thing.
265
00:12:21,073 --> 00:12:23,743
You listen to the radiator hiss
while I drink whiskey
266
00:12:23,826 --> 00:12:25,536
under this naked lightbulb.
267
00:12:25,619 --> 00:12:27,246
(radiator hissing)
268
00:12:29,290 --> 00:12:32,084
It was a sad life, but I wasn't affected.
269
00:12:34,044 --> 00:12:36,422
(dog barks mournfully)
270
00:12:36,505 --> 00:12:38,132
♪ They bite and fight and bite ♪
271
00:12:38,215 --> 00:12:39,508
♪ Fight, fight, fight,
bite, bite, bite ♪
272
00:12:39,592 --> 00:12:42,595
♪ The Itchy & Scratchy Show ♪
273
00:12:43,929 --> 00:12:46,307
I brought you more lasagna, cousin.
274
00:12:46,390 --> 00:12:47,933
Mmm.
275
00:12:50,811 --> 00:12:51,812
(laughs)
276
00:12:51,896 --> 00:12:55,399
You know these cartoons are made
by exploiting Korean children?
277
00:12:55,483 --> 00:12:57,985
You ruin everything.
278
00:12:58,068 --> 00:12:59,320
(saxophone note plays)
279
00:12:59,403 --> 00:13:02,198
(snoring, groaning)
280
00:13:02,281 --> 00:13:03,532
(blows note)
281
00:13:03,616 --> 00:13:04,992
(snoring, groaning)
282
00:13:05,075 --> 00:13:06,243
(plays higher note)
283
00:13:06,327 --> 00:13:08,204
(sighs)
284
00:13:08,287 --> 00:13:10,915
(gasps) Bart? What is it?
285
00:13:10,998 --> 00:13:14,168
Um, listen, I have...
I have to tell you something.
286
00:13:14,251 --> 00:13:17,421
I-I was jealous,
and I-I threw your hat away.
287
00:13:17,505 --> 00:13:18,923
(gasps loudly)
288
00:13:19,006 --> 00:13:21,675
Oh, that went a lot better
than I thought.
289
00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:24,261
-Why did you do it?
-I don't know.
290
00:13:24,345 --> 00:13:26,847
The important thing
is you got to forgive me right now.
291
00:13:26,931 --> 00:13:28,224
I feel kind of guilty.
292
00:13:28,307 --> 00:13:31,060
Then I hope your guilt will grow...
293
00:13:31,143 --> 00:13:33,145
and grow...
294
00:13:33,229 --> 00:13:34,814
and grow.
295
00:13:34,897 --> 00:13:38,150
And no matter how much
you try to pretty it up...
296
00:13:39,777 --> 00:13:43,489
it'll still be the most hideous thing
you could imagine!
297
00:13:44,782 --> 00:13:46,951
(screams)
298
00:13:48,202 --> 00:13:50,120
Nerds! Get 'em!
299
00:13:50,204 --> 00:13:51,205
-(Homer groans)
-(Marge screams)
300
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:56,460
A cupcake? Please.
301
00:13:57,753 --> 00:13:59,296
{\an8}No.
302
00:13:59,380 --> 00:14:01,507
{\an8}Mm-mm.
303
00:14:01,590 --> 00:14:03,050
{\an8}So what?
304
00:14:04,176 --> 00:14:05,719
I'm truly sorry, Bart,
305
00:14:05,803 --> 00:14:08,180
but it's a wound nothing can heal.
306
00:14:09,348 --> 00:14:11,559
{\an8}A bunny and a hammer?
307
00:14:11,642 --> 00:14:14,019
{\an8}Well, my mom did say bring home dinner.
308
00:14:14,103 --> 00:14:15,521
{\an8}(hums)
309
00:14:19,024 --> 00:14:21,527
Homer, listen, hey,
I got something very scary to tell you.
310
00:14:21,610 --> 00:14:24,196
Now, I was on this alt-suicide subreddit,
311
00:14:24,280 --> 00:14:25,656
you know, just-just checking in,
312
00:14:25,739 --> 00:14:28,659
and I found out
why you are so good at chess.
313
00:14:28,742 --> 00:14:30,119
Go on.
314
00:14:30,202 --> 00:14:34,290
Chess represents your desire
to kill your father.
315
00:14:34,373 --> 00:14:36,542
What the... That's ridiculous!
316
00:14:36,625 --> 00:14:39,169
Now, I'm here to bowl! (groans)
317
00:14:39,253 --> 00:14:41,338
You'll end up in the gutter!
318
00:14:42,256 --> 00:14:45,175
Oh, my head! Oh! I'll sue!
319
00:14:45,259 --> 00:14:46,760
I can't afford the copay!
320
00:14:46,844 --> 00:14:49,013
Won't someone reset us?!
321
00:14:49,096 --> 00:14:51,015
Well, at least I'm safe.
322
00:14:51,098 --> 00:14:52,892
(grunting)
323
00:14:54,602 --> 00:14:55,769
(gasps)
324
00:14:57,938 --> 00:15:00,024
I'm in luck! It's still here!
325
00:15:02,443 --> 00:15:04,153
(gasps) My hat!
326
00:15:04,236 --> 00:15:07,281
Aah! My car! And my house.
327
00:15:16,832 --> 00:15:18,834
Homer, before you give up,
328
00:15:18,918 --> 00:15:22,463
I Skyped someone who knows
a little bit about chess.
329
00:15:22,546 --> 00:15:24,632
Oh, I don't think any chess master
330
00:15:24,715 --> 00:15:28,469
or even international master
could understand how I feel.
331
00:15:28,552 --> 00:15:31,388
I'm world chess champion Magnus Carlsen.
332
00:15:31,472 --> 00:15:34,224
(gasps) I understand Norwegian!
333
00:15:34,308 --> 00:15:38,354
When I heard a fellow chess player
had a mental problem, I Skyped at once.
334
00:15:38,437 --> 00:15:39,980
I'm not a chess player anymore.
335
00:15:40,064 --> 00:15:42,524
From now on, I'm only playing Stratego!
336
00:15:42,608 --> 00:15:45,110
I cannot play Stratego--
I'm scared of the bomb.
337
00:15:45,194 --> 00:15:46,737
Yeah, tell me about it.
338
00:15:46,820 --> 00:15:49,573
Homer, I'm afraid
you cannot run away from chess.
339
00:15:49,657 --> 00:15:52,910
The reason I got into chess
was because it didn't involve running.
340
00:15:52,993 --> 00:15:55,579
I share your disdain for exercise.
341
00:15:55,663 --> 00:15:58,040
Now I will say something
with all the emotion
342
00:15:58,123 --> 00:15:59,959
a Norwegian can muster.
343
00:16:03,379 --> 00:16:05,297
To find your true feelings,
344
00:16:05,381 --> 00:16:07,925
you must finish your final
chess match with your father.
345
00:16:08,008 --> 00:16:10,344
-(gasps)
-I'm sorry, you cut out for a second.
346
00:16:10,427 --> 00:16:12,680
Did you gasp? Then you will nod.
347
00:16:12,763 --> 00:16:14,682
Then you will eat a piece of cheese
348
00:16:14,765 --> 00:16:16,266
while the wife doesn't look.
349
00:16:16,350 --> 00:16:19,186
{\an8}Then you will undo
the top button of your pants.
350
00:16:19,269 --> 00:16:21,230
{\an8}I'm always three moves ahead.
351
00:16:22,356 --> 00:16:24,441
-(tires screech)
-D'oh!
352
00:16:25,651 --> 00:16:27,820
Okay, I don't have to move the cube.
353
00:16:27,903 --> 00:16:29,488
I just have to get the hat out.
354
00:16:29,571 --> 00:16:31,031
Ga-der!
355
00:16:31,115 --> 00:16:34,868
I never thought I'd sink this low,
but I need help from God.
356
00:16:34,952 --> 00:16:38,163
Let our faith lift up this cube, Lord.
357
00:16:39,248 --> 00:16:40,416
Huh?
358
00:16:41,291 --> 00:16:43,502
Aw. Thanks for nothing.
359
00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:52,177
{\an8}-(sizzling)
-Huh?
360
00:16:52,261 --> 00:16:55,472
{\an8}The soda ate right through the metal!
Just glad I'm not a car.
361
00:16:57,599 --> 00:17:00,019
{\an8}Ah. I just have to get more.
362
00:17:00,102 --> 00:17:01,854
{\an8}(sizzling)
363
00:17:03,647 --> 00:17:06,567
-Hit it, boys!
-(both praying indistinctly)
364
00:17:06,650 --> 00:17:08,819
♪ ♪
365
00:17:08,902 --> 00:17:10,404
And... evil thoughts.
366
00:17:10,487 --> 00:17:12,573
-(both gasp)
-(sizzling)
367
00:17:17,369 --> 00:17:19,455
Boys, are you performing miracles?
368
00:17:19,538 --> 00:17:21,874
Jesus is performing them through us.
369
00:17:21,957 --> 00:17:23,333
Well, all right, then.
370
00:17:26,295 --> 00:17:29,006
I'm here to play chess,
we're gonna play chess,
371
00:17:29,089 --> 00:17:31,508
-and not another word!
-I play chess?
372
00:17:31,592 --> 00:17:34,094
♪ ♪
373
00:17:52,154 --> 00:17:54,114
An excellent move by Homer.
374
00:17:54,198 --> 00:17:55,866
(cheering)
375
00:17:55,949 --> 00:17:58,243
A stout defense by Grampa.
376
00:17:58,327 --> 00:17:59,828
(cheering)
377
00:17:59,912 --> 00:18:02,539
Doesn't anyone want
to watch the Super Bowl?
378
00:18:02,623 --> 00:18:04,249
Get lost!
379
00:18:05,667 --> 00:18:07,377
MAGNUS: Homer has a win in hand.
380
00:18:07,461 --> 00:18:09,838
He merely needs to take Grampa's knight.
381
00:18:09,922 --> 00:18:13,342
Oh, he's gonna be a new man.
A new man, you hear me?
382
00:18:13,425 --> 00:18:15,803
Can I go? It's, like, 4:00 a.m. for me.
383
00:18:15,886 --> 00:18:18,138
Sure. Fine. Uh, who is that guy?
384
00:18:18,222 --> 00:18:20,724
Magnus Carlsen-- my cousin.
385
00:18:21,725 --> 00:18:24,228
{\an8}♪ ♪
386
00:18:31,068 --> 00:18:34,321
HOMER: (thinking) Isn't a father
more important than a victory?
387
00:18:34,404 --> 00:18:36,448
I've never really known either.
388
00:18:40,077 --> 00:18:42,162
You resign?!
389
00:18:42,246 --> 00:18:44,623
Dad, Dad, it seems I love you.
390
00:18:44,706 --> 00:18:46,917
Can't you say it seems
you love me, too?
391
00:18:47,000 --> 00:18:49,336
Aw... my son loves me.
392
00:18:49,419 --> 00:18:51,004
Now I can die in peace.
393
00:18:51,088 --> 00:18:53,257
-Really?
-Hold your horses!
394
00:18:54,842 --> 00:18:57,261
(panting) Lisa! Stupid Lisa!
395
00:18:57,344 --> 00:18:58,846
I've got something to show you!
396
00:18:58,929 --> 00:19:00,556
I found Sunny!
397
00:19:00,639 --> 00:19:02,141
I don't want the hat anymore.
398
00:19:02,224 --> 00:19:04,810
What? You really don't have
any choice in the matter.
399
00:19:04,893 --> 00:19:08,397
-Here!
-I told you, the wound won't heal.
400
00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:12,151
Your best bet is to forget me
and start fresh with Maggie.
401
00:19:12,234 --> 00:19:15,237
She likes raisins, Bart.
Give her raisins.
402
00:19:20,159 --> 00:19:21,869
(groans)
403
00:19:22,953 --> 00:19:26,415
♪ Wouldn't it be nice
if we were older? ♪
404
00:19:26,498 --> 00:19:28,292
♪ Then we wouldn't have... ♪
405
00:19:28,375 --> 00:19:30,919
He's trying to be nice.
406
00:19:31,003 --> 00:19:33,005
(sobbing)
407
00:19:33,088 --> 00:19:34,798
Now what's your problem?
408
00:19:34,882 --> 00:19:37,467
Oh, shut up! I forgive you!
409
00:19:37,551 --> 00:19:39,803
-You forgive me?
-(stifling sobs)
410
00:19:39,887 --> 00:19:42,973
Yes.
In the right hat, anything is possible.
411
00:19:43,056 --> 00:19:44,224
(both sigh)
412
00:19:45,475 --> 00:19:48,979
Why does everyone feel so good
when I leave?!
413
00:19:50,063 --> 00:19:51,440
(grunts)
414
00:19:53,108 --> 00:19:55,027
(snarls)
415
00:19:55,110 --> 00:19:57,237
Ooh-hoo-hoo! This will come in handy.
416
00:19:57,321 --> 00:19:59,615
♪ ♪
417
00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:01,033
What's going on here?
418
00:20:01,116 --> 00:20:02,618
Bart and I are friends again.
419
00:20:02,701 --> 00:20:03,785
(chuckles)
420
00:20:03,869 --> 00:20:06,955
I do some of my best fathering
when I'm not around.
421
00:20:07,039 --> 00:20:10,584
-Hey, who are you?
-Oh, you'll find out.
422
00:20:10,667 --> 00:20:12,586
-(chuckles)
-Listen, pal,
423
00:20:12,669 --> 00:20:14,296
I have plenty of demons.
424
00:20:14,379 --> 00:20:15,839
Get in line.
425
00:20:15,923 --> 00:20:17,341
-How you doing?
-Drunk!
426
00:20:17,424 --> 00:20:18,926
Hey, I thought you were sloth.
427
00:20:19,009 --> 00:20:21,386
Sloths can be drunk.
428
00:20:24,473 --> 00:20:27,142
So we learned Bart has a conscience.
429
00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:28,393
Haw haw!
430
00:20:28,477 --> 00:20:30,062
(singsongy) You have a conscience!
431
00:20:30,145 --> 00:20:31,855
-(grunts)
-Closed set!
432
00:20:31,939 --> 00:20:33,732
My mom's dating your gaffer.
433
00:20:33,815 --> 00:20:35,317
Jack! Is that true?
434
00:20:35,400 --> 00:20:37,402
I'm... not proud of it.
435
00:20:37,486 --> 00:20:41,657
You seemed pretty proud
when you ate all our ramen noodles.
436
00:20:41,740 --> 00:20:43,742
(Mozart's "Requiem" playing)
437
00:20:47,079 --> 00:20:50,249
{\an8}Listen, I got to know.
Do you chess guys get groupies?
438
00:20:50,332 --> 00:20:52,292
{\an8}Homer, I wish you could stop.
439
00:20:52,376 --> 00:20:54,878
{\an8}-These Skypes aren't free.
-Yes, they are.
440
00:20:54,962 --> 00:20:56,964
{\an8}I still don't want to talk to you.
441
00:20:58,423 --> 00:21:00,425
(theme music playing)
442
00:21:27,119 --> 00:21:29,579
-(crowd murmuring)
-Shh!
443
00:21:32,332 --> 00:21:34,960
Subtitled by Brooke McDonald