1 00:00:08,861 --> 00:00:10,497 Mmm. When I die, 2 00:00:10,565 --> 00:00:12,769 we should totally get this sandwich place 3 00:00:12,835 --> 00:00:13,871 for my memorial. 4 00:00:13,938 --> 00:00:16,977 So good. Mmm. Can't wait. 5 00:00:17,044 --> 00:00:20,483 Oh, all these people loved Mr. Chase. 6 00:00:20,551 --> 00:00:22,989 His students are taking it so hard. 7 00:00:23,056 --> 00:00:25,628 Yeah, nobody grieves like theater kids. 8 00:00:30,905 --> 00:00:32,341 This is my show! 9 00:00:32,407 --> 00:00:35,213 Why are they singing about computers? 10 00:00:35,280 --> 00:00:37,184 - It was a musical about Y2 - K, 11 00:00:37,250 --> 00:00:39,689 which was very scary back then. 12 00:00:39,756 --> 00:00:42,094 Scarier than anything we have now. 13 00:00:42,160 --> 00:00:44,599 The whole show takes place on New Year's Eve, 14 00:00:44,666 --> 00:00:47,471 ‐1999... ‐♪ Five, four, three 15 00:00:47,537 --> 00:00:50,243 ♪ Two, zero, zero, zero ♪ 16 00:00:50,310 --> 00:00:54,686 -♪ A midnight countdown to Y2 - K ♪ 17 00:00:54,753 --> 00:00:59,461 ♪ Five, four, three, two, will I be a zero? 18 00:00:59,528 --> 00:01:04,238 ♪ When tomorrow becomes today. ♪ 19 00:01:04,304 --> 00:01:06,108 Mom, which one are you? 20 00:01:06,175 --> 00:01:08,346 I was right over here. 21 00:01:08,413 --> 00:01:11,118 In the wings, calling all the shots... 22 00:01:11,185 --> 00:01:14,158 as the stage manager. 23 00:01:14,224 --> 00:01:17,999 Mrs. Chase, I'm so sorry for your loss. 24 00:01:18,066 --> 00:01:19,368 Oh, thank you, dear. 25 00:01:19,435 --> 00:01:21,840 Say, look what I found when I was cleaning out 26 00:01:21,907 --> 00:01:23,577 - Franklin's office. - 27 00:01:23,644 --> 00:01:25,080 My prompt book. 28 00:01:25,146 --> 00:01:27,117 This binder lists all the cues 29 00:01:27,184 --> 00:01:29,521 for the entire production. 30 00:01:29,589 --> 00:01:32,729 Oh, Franklin always said you were the heart of the show‐‐ 31 00:01:32,795 --> 00:01:36,435 that your stage managing was so... zealous. 32 00:01:36,502 --> 00:01:38,841 I definitely ran a tight ship. 33 00:01:38,907 --> 00:01:41,445 But in a fun way everyone loved, obviously. 34 00:01:41,512 --> 00:01:43,483 - Oh, yeah, totally. - Super fun. 35 00:01:43,550 --> 00:01:46,590 Of course, I would have loved to have been in the show, 36 00:01:46,656 --> 00:01:48,493 except I'm not much of a singer. 37 00:01:48,560 --> 00:01:52,568 But in my imagination, I've got the voice of a Disney princess. 38 00:01:52,635 --> 00:01:53,369 Oh... 39 00:01:53,436 --> 00:01:55,340 What a special time. 40 00:01:55,406 --> 00:01:58,212 I'd give anything to feel that magic again. 41 00:02:02,755 --> 00:02:05,895 Script notes and sound cues 42 00:02:05,961 --> 00:02:08,600 ♪ Take me there again ♪ 43 00:02:08,667 --> 00:02:11,038 ♪ In my blacks in the backs of the wings 44 00:02:11,105 --> 00:02:13,409 ♪ So I'm not seen ♪ 45 00:02:15,446 --> 00:02:17,517 ♪ No one knows the magic ♪ 46 00:02:17,585 --> 00:02:22,460 ♪ That hides behind the scenes 47 00:02:23,296 --> 00:02:25,099 It's me! 48 00:02:25,166 --> 00:02:27,337 The cast said yes! 49 00:02:27,404 --> 00:02:29,943 We're putting on a musical! 50 00:02:30,009 --> 00:02:32,214 Places, everybody 51 00:02:32,280 --> 00:02:34,686 ♪ It's time to start the show ♪ 52 00:02:34,752 --> 00:02:36,656 ♪ That's what actors need me to say 53 00:02:36,723 --> 00:02:39,228 ♪ Otherwise, they wouldn't know where to go 54 00:02:39,294 --> 00:02:41,098 ♪ Cinch up the hemlines ♪ 55 00:02:41,165 --> 00:02:43,502 ♪ Sound check all the mics ♪ 56 00:02:43,570 --> 00:02:45,540 ♪ Close the door, ring the bell 57 00:02:45,608 --> 00:02:48,512 ♪ And bring down the house lights 58 00:02:48,580 --> 00:02:53,456 ♪ It's curtains up for Marge Bouvier 59 00:02:53,522 --> 00:02:56,495 ♪ 'Cause I'm once again the star 60 00:02:56,563 --> 00:02:58,432 ♪ Of the backstage ♪ 61 00:02:58,499 --> 00:03:00,436 Wow, you're the director? 62 00:03:00,503 --> 00:03:03,342 No, more important‐‐ the stage manager. 63 00:03:03,409 --> 00:03:05,614 - Ah! - Five minutes, guys! 64 00:03:05,681 --> 00:03:07,585 - Thank you, five. - Five minutes. 65 00:03:07,652 --> 00:03:10,925 I always used to love saying that, before... 66 00:03:10,991 --> 00:03:13,329 The endless loads of laundry 67 00:03:13,396 --> 00:03:15,533 ♪ The dishes piled high ♪ 68 00:03:15,601 --> 00:03:17,537 ♪ The whining and complaining ♪ 69 00:03:17,605 --> 00:03:18,907 ‐♪ It's mine ♪ ‐♪ It's mine 70 00:03:18,974 --> 00:03:21,111 - ♪ It's mine ♪ - Enough! 71 00:03:21,178 --> 00:03:26,488 I'm returning to my theater family 72 00:03:26,556 --> 00:03:31,599 ♪ A revival of our fondest memories 73 00:03:31,666 --> 00:03:33,135 ‐♪ Singin'... ♪ ‐♪ Do 74 00:03:33,202 --> 00:03:34,872 ‐♪ Re ♪ ‐♪ Mi 75 00:03:34,939 --> 00:03:37,878 - ♪ This ♪ ‐♪ Show - ♪ 76 00:03:37,945 --> 00:03:40,183 ♪ The talk of the town ♪ 77 00:03:40,249 --> 00:03:43,456 ♪ A hit, a smash, the rage ♪ 78 00:03:43,522 --> 00:03:46,428 ♪ And there's nothing Springfield needs more 79 00:03:46,495 --> 00:03:48,065 ♪ Than a play ♪ 80 00:03:48,132 --> 00:03:49,368 Good! 81 00:03:49,434 --> 00:03:52,007 'Cause I'm once again the 82 00:03:52,073 --> 00:03:54,645 ♪ Appreciated, well‐respected, never, ever disconnected 83 00:03:54,712 --> 00:03:56,348 ♪ Nothing but the most impressive 84 00:03:56,415 --> 00:03:57,818 ♪ Everybody's dearest friended ♪ 85 00:03:57,885 --> 00:04:00,624 ♪ Star ♪ 86 00:04:00,691 --> 00:04:03,797 ♪ Of the backstage... ♪ 87 00:04:03,864 --> 00:04:05,834 ♪ She's the star, see how she shines 88 00:04:05,901 --> 00:04:09,541 ♪ She answers when we call for lines 89 00:04:09,609 --> 00:04:12,848 ♪ Places, everybody! ♪ 90 00:04:14,919 --> 00:04:17,558 Wow, honey, those dorks are so excited to be 91 00:04:17,625 --> 00:04:18,860 in your show again. 92 00:04:18,927 --> 00:04:19,927 And I will do everything 93 00:04:19,962 --> 00:04:21,566 I can to support you... 94 00:04:21,633 --> 00:04:23,135 while I'm at Moe's. 95 00:04:23,202 --> 00:04:24,572 Mwah. 96 00:04:24,639 --> 00:04:27,444 Sorry, Marge, but I got to drop out of the show. 97 00:04:27,510 --> 00:04:29,281 I broke my hip while singing and dancing 98 00:04:29,347 --> 00:04:30,918 about feeling young again. 99 00:04:31,820 --> 00:04:34,224 Say, Dad, what if you filled in for Lenny 100 00:04:34,291 --> 00:04:35,694 and joined Mom's musical? 101 00:04:35,761 --> 00:04:39,936 Yeah, then you'd be the most supportive husband ever. 102 00:04:40,002 --> 00:04:41,338 Great idea, kids. 103 00:04:41,405 --> 00:04:42,608 I'm all in, babe! 104 00:04:42,675 --> 00:04:45,480 One pair of super tight dance pants, please! 105 00:04:47,718 --> 00:04:50,557 From this day forward, we are enemies. 106 00:04:50,624 --> 00:04:52,427 Forever and ever. 107 00:04:52,494 --> 00:04:54,297 Forever. 108 00:04:54,364 --> 00:04:55,667 Okay, 109 00:04:55,734 --> 00:04:59,775 back on stage‐‐ it's just like we're teenagers again. 110 00:04:59,842 --> 00:05:02,080 Now let's start the rehearsal. 111 00:05:02,147 --> 00:05:03,349 Theater! 112 00:05:03,415 --> 00:05:05,754 Wait, we can't start without Sasha Reed. 113 00:05:05,821 --> 00:05:07,399 - She was the star of the show. - Mm‐hmm. 114 00:05:07,423 --> 00:05:09,127 She got into Julliard. 115 00:05:10,296 --> 00:05:11,298 Sasha. 116 00:05:11,365 --> 00:05:12,935 You never forget your first diva. 117 00:05:13,002 --> 00:05:15,206 I'd love to know what she's been up to. 118 00:05:15,273 --> 00:05:17,110 Well, as your dutiful stage manager, 119 00:05:17,177 --> 00:05:20,918 I did reach out repeatedly, but never heard back. 120 00:05:20,984 --> 00:05:23,355 I guess we'll never know what happened 121 00:05:23,422 --> 00:05:26,028 after Sasha left little old Springfield 122 00:05:26,094 --> 00:05:27,463 for New York City. 123 00:05:27,530 --> 00:05:28,900 Never say never! 124 00:05:28,967 --> 00:05:31,104 Hello, old friends! 125 00:05:31,171 --> 00:05:33,142 Ah! It's Sasha! 126 00:05:33,209 --> 00:05:36,716 Let me tell you all about it. 127 00:05:36,783 --> 00:05:39,054 ♪ It was a cold and rainy morning 128 00:05:39,120 --> 00:05:41,258 ♪ When I exited the bus ♪ 129 00:05:41,325 --> 00:05:43,529 ♪ I stepped into the city ♪ 130 00:05:43,597 --> 00:05:46,201 ♪ Everyone in such a rush ♪ 131 00:05:46,268 --> 00:05:48,539 ♪ I suppose I started singing ♪ 132 00:05:48,607 --> 00:05:50,711 ♪ Just to keep the chill at bay 133 00:05:50,777 --> 00:05:53,550 ♪ I guess I sounded something like 134 00:05:53,617 --> 00:05:57,023 ♪ This ♪ 135 00:05:57,090 --> 00:06:01,799 ♪ And that's when I heard a man say 136 00:06:01,866 --> 00:06:04,237 ♪ "That tone, that pitch ♪ 137 00:06:04,304 --> 00:06:06,041 ♪ "Your voice'll make us rich ♪ 138 00:06:06,108 --> 00:06:10,449 ♪ Stick with me, and you'll be destined to impress" 139 00:06:10,516 --> 00:06:12,153 ♪ And that's how Sasha became ♪ 140 00:06:12,220 --> 00:06:14,892 ♪ A massive success ♪ 141 00:06:14,959 --> 00:06:16,061 ♪ Yes, Sasha ♪ 142 00:06:16,128 --> 00:06:18,566 ♪ Is a massive success ♪ 143 00:06:20,971 --> 00:06:23,576 ♪ Now I dine on the veranda ♪ 144 00:06:23,643 --> 00:06:25,781 ♪ With Lin‐Manuel Miranda ♪ 145 00:06:25,847 --> 00:06:28,620 ♪ Scrape meat off the bone with Patti LuPone 146 00:06:28,687 --> 00:06:30,222 ♪ Don't mention Glenn Close ♪ 147 00:06:30,289 --> 00:06:32,060 ♪ I eat Bananas Foster ♪ 148 00:06:32,126 --> 00:06:34,130 ♪ With my good friend Sutton Foster 149 00:06:34,197 --> 00:06:37,604 ♪ Thanks to Stephen Sondheim, who's the most gracious host 150 00:06:37,671 --> 00:06:40,744 ♪ Yes, I'm everything you thought I'd be 151 00:06:40,811 --> 00:06:42,881 ♪ When I left Springfield for the big city 152 00:06:42,948 --> 00:06:46,589 ♪ I've made it, I'm a cut above the rest 153 00:06:47,523 --> 00:06:50,496 ♪ 'Cause Sasha has returned ♪ 154 00:06:50,564 --> 00:06:52,200 ♪ A massive ♪ 155 00:06:52,266 --> 00:06:56,274 ♪ Success... ♪ 156 00:06:58,011 --> 00:06:59,114 ♪ That's right ♪ 157 00:06:59,180 --> 00:07:00,516 ♪ I'm a Broadway ♪ 158 00:07:00,584 --> 00:07:05,660 ♪ Star! ♪ 159 00:07:08,265 --> 00:07:11,338 Oh, I can't believe Sasha came back. 160 00:07:11,405 --> 00:07:13,075 What a career! 161 00:07:14,043 --> 00:07:16,682 I know a famous person that knows what's his name, 162 00:07:16,749 --> 00:07:18,720 who is she, and never heard of him! 163 00:07:19,487 --> 00:07:21,659 Okay, okay, everybody. 164 00:07:21,726 --> 00:07:25,032 It's so exciting that Sasha is a massive success, 165 00:07:25,099 --> 00:07:27,671 but we really need to walk through our blocking. 166 00:07:27,738 --> 00:07:29,274 Let's make it precise, gang! 167 00:07:29,340 --> 00:07:31,244 Blocking, so important. 168 00:07:31,311 --> 00:07:33,115 That's what Hal always told me. 169 00:07:33,182 --> 00:07:34,451 Hal Prince. 170 00:07:34,517 --> 00:07:35,887 Boom! Named it! 171 00:07:35,954 --> 00:07:38,660 But before we get into the technical stuff, 172 00:07:38,726 --> 00:07:42,601 we need to reconnect as an ensemblé. 173 00:07:42,668 --> 00:07:45,072 Let's all go to my lake house and do trust falls. 174 00:07:45,139 --> 00:07:47,644 But we have to carve out some time to run lines. 175 00:07:47,711 --> 00:07:51,418 Marge Bouvier, you have not changed a bit. 176 00:07:51,485 --> 00:07:53,690 Okay, Mom, we'll run lines, 177 00:07:53,756 --> 00:07:55,292 but don't wait up for us. 178 00:07:55,359 --> 00:07:56,528 Us? What do you mean? 179 00:07:56,596 --> 00:07:59,167 This bonding session is for the cast. 180 00:07:59,234 --> 00:08:01,037 You understand, right? 181 00:08:01,104 --> 00:08:02,106 Oh. 182 00:08:02,173 --> 00:08:04,277 Sure. Of course. 183 00:08:04,344 --> 00:08:06,515 Come on, friends! 184 00:08:06,582 --> 00:08:09,655 I was wrong. Theater kids are super cool. 185 00:08:09,722 --> 00:08:11,024 Thanks for the hookup, honey. 186 00:08:19,307 --> 00:08:22,413 ♪ How will I stay alive? ♪ 187 00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:24,450 ♪ When all ♪ 188 00:08:24,517 --> 00:08:26,656 ♪ The computers think I died? ♪ 189 00:08:26,722 --> 00:08:29,327 ‐♪ How will I ♪ ‐♪ How will I 190 00:08:29,394 --> 00:08:31,364 ♪ Stay alive ♪ 191 00:08:31,431 --> 00:08:34,805 ♪ When all the clocks and the computers 192 00:08:34,872 --> 00:08:37,844 ♪ Think I died? ♪ 193 00:08:42,821 --> 00:08:45,594 Okay, the curtain‐raiser went a smidge long, 194 00:08:45,660 --> 00:08:47,430 so stay on your marks next time. 195 00:08:47,496 --> 00:08:49,400 - Take five! - Thank you, five. 196 00:08:49,467 --> 00:08:53,308 Anyway, I hope you all remember the best part of rehearsal... 197 00:08:53,375 --> 00:08:54,878 brownies! 198 00:08:54,945 --> 00:08:59,053 Are those Margie's Brownies with walnuts and M&Ms? 199 00:08:59,855 --> 00:09:01,792 It's true, I do matter. 200 00:09:01,859 --> 00:09:04,297 Look what else I'm included in. 201 00:09:04,364 --> 00:09:05,934 It's all from our shows. 202 00:09:06,001 --> 00:09:08,438 We were such a tight‐knit group. 203 00:09:08,505 --> 00:09:10,409 Remember the tightness of the knitting? 204 00:09:10,476 --> 00:09:12,981 There's my old guitar pick. 205 00:09:13,048 --> 00:09:17,123 Oh, I haven't played guitar since I lost this! 206 00:09:18,425 --> 00:09:19,662 Still works! 207 00:09:20,930 --> 00:09:23,201 Oh, man, this takes me back... 208 00:09:23,268 --> 00:09:24,370 Remember, guys? 209 00:09:25,372 --> 00:09:27,309 ♪ Bonfires at Billy's ♪ 210 00:09:27,376 --> 00:09:30,917 ♪ We'd talk about our dreams ♪ 211 00:09:34,190 --> 00:09:36,662 ♪ We'd get drunk and make out, ha 212 00:09:36,729 --> 00:09:39,000 ♪ Cause a scene ♪ 213 00:09:39,067 --> 00:09:41,071 Remind me who Billy was again? 214 00:09:41,137 --> 00:09:42,674 You know‐‐ Billy. 215 00:09:43,442 --> 00:09:45,446 ♪ Late nights at the diner ♪ 216 00:09:45,512 --> 00:09:48,518 ♪ We'd laugh and we'd cry ♪ 217 00:09:48,586 --> 00:09:50,790 Right. Uh‐huh. The diner. 218 00:09:50,857 --> 00:09:53,896 ♪ Smoking clove cigarettes ♪ 219 00:09:53,963 --> 00:09:57,069 ♪ Ruthie serving us cheese fries 220 00:09:57,136 --> 00:09:58,806 Is that why you guys always smelled 221 00:09:58,873 --> 00:09:59,942 like burnt cinnamon? 222 00:10:00,008 --> 00:10:02,948 ♪ Climbing the water tower ♪ 223 00:10:03,014 --> 00:10:05,085 ♪ Drunk on whiskey sours ♪ 224 00:10:05,152 --> 00:10:07,858 ♪ Stealing the Lard Lad sign ♪ 225 00:10:07,924 --> 00:10:10,395 - That was you guys? - Yeah. 226 00:10:10,462 --> 00:10:12,266 ♪ Remember the times ♪ 227 00:10:12,333 --> 00:10:14,170 ♪ The best times ♪ 228 00:10:14,237 --> 00:10:16,407 ♪ Of our lives ♪ 229 00:10:16,474 --> 00:10:20,249 ♪ We had nothing but times ♪ 230 00:10:21,351 --> 00:10:24,090 ♪ Remember the times ♪ 231 00:10:24,157 --> 00:10:27,163 Okay, I might've missed some of those specific moments, 232 00:10:27,229 --> 00:10:30,068 but I'm sure I'll remember all the other ones. 233 00:10:30,135 --> 00:10:31,939 What else? 234 00:10:33,408 --> 00:10:35,345 ♪ The kegger at Marge's ♪ 235 00:10:35,412 --> 00:10:37,516 ♪ What an epic night ♪ 236 00:10:37,584 --> 00:10:39,788 Wait, there was a party at my house? 237 00:10:39,855 --> 00:10:41,324 Where was I? 238 00:10:41,391 --> 00:10:44,463 ♪ She was at a tech run‐through 239 00:10:44,530 --> 00:10:46,669 ♪ Nowhere in sight ♪ 240 00:10:46,735 --> 00:10:49,975 Guys, that's like, pretty messed up. 241 00:10:50,877 --> 00:10:52,213 ♪ Oh, yeah ♪ 242 00:10:52,279 --> 00:10:55,185 ♪ I was at that super killer party, too 243 00:10:55,252 --> 00:10:57,022 You weren't even in the show. 244 00:10:57,089 --> 00:10:58,659 ♪ Yeah, but I was cool ♪ 245 00:11:00,028 --> 00:11:01,397 ♪ Lenny fell off the roof ♪ 246 00:11:01,464 --> 00:11:03,736 ‐What? ‐♪ Marge's parents got sued 247 00:11:03,803 --> 00:11:06,775 ♪ And had to file for bankruptcy 248 00:11:06,842 --> 00:11:08,980 Is that why I couldn't go away to college? 249 00:11:09,046 --> 00:11:10,717 ♪ Remember the time ♪ 250 00:11:10,783 --> 00:11:13,455 ♪ When Jackie died ♪ 251 00:11:13,521 --> 00:11:15,058 Wait, I thought Jackie moved. 252 00:11:15,125 --> 00:11:17,529 - ♪ No one saw the signs ♪ - 253 00:11:17,597 --> 00:11:19,166 ♪ Together we cried ♪ 254 00:11:19,233 --> 00:11:22,039 ♪ And then we made it about ourselves 255 00:11:22,106 --> 00:11:24,010 ♪ When the reporter came ♪ 256 00:11:24,076 --> 00:11:26,347 ‐What?! ‐♪ He worked for The Times ♪ 257 00:11:26,414 --> 00:11:27,414 Which one? 258 00:11:27,449 --> 00:11:29,721 ♪ The New York Times ♪ 259 00:11:29,788 --> 00:11:31,926 ♪ Such timey times ♪ 260 00:11:31,992 --> 00:11:33,763 How'd I miss all of this? 261 00:11:33,829 --> 00:11:37,637 ♪ We were all together. ♪ 262 00:11:37,704 --> 00:11:39,307 Except me. 263 00:11:42,714 --> 00:11:44,918 Script notes and sound cues 264 00:11:44,985 --> 00:11:48,626 ♪ They never saw me as a friend 265 00:11:48,693 --> 00:11:51,699 ♪ In my blacks in the backs of the wings 266 00:11:51,765 --> 00:11:54,938 ♪ I was unseen ♪ 267 00:11:56,742 --> 00:11:59,614 ♪ So much for the magic ♪ 268 00:11:59,681 --> 00:12:04,858 ♪ No one wants old Marjorie. ♪ 269 00:12:08,933 --> 00:12:12,539 I was unpopular and never knew! 270 00:12:12,607 --> 00:12:14,510 All my best memories are ruined. 271 00:12:14,578 --> 00:12:17,516 I wish I had never done this stupid musical again. 272 00:12:17,584 --> 00:12:21,491 As soon as Sasha showed up, it was like I didn't exist. 273 00:12:21,558 --> 00:12:23,294 I never liked that Sasha Reed. 274 00:12:23,361 --> 00:12:25,933 Taking pop out of the fridge without asking... 275 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:27,469 getting us sued... 276 00:12:28,739 --> 00:12:30,542 Of course! It's all Sasha's fault. 277 00:12:30,610 --> 00:12:33,816 Someone ought to teach that Broadway big shot a lesson. 278 00:12:33,883 --> 00:12:36,789 Mom, do you still have a computer? 279 00:12:40,295 --> 00:12:44,003 Last night I made some very interesting discoveries, 280 00:12:44,070 --> 00:12:48,011 requiring the printing of a revised playbill. 281 00:12:49,447 --> 00:12:52,620 I'll refer you to page three 282 00:12:52,687 --> 00:12:55,258 ♪ To an updated biography ♪ 283 00:12:55,325 --> 00:12:57,196 ♪ Of which you must see ♪ 284 00:12:57,262 --> 00:12:59,901 ♪ Certain to change your view ♪ 285 00:12:59,968 --> 00:13:04,443 ♪ Of the beloved ingenue ♪ 286 00:13:05,412 --> 00:13:06,882 ♪ Sasha! Poof ♪ 287 00:13:06,949 --> 00:13:08,284 ♪ The truth ♪ 288 00:13:09,220 --> 00:13:12,760 ♪ She's never been in a Broadway musical or play? 289 00:13:12,827 --> 00:13:17,136 ♪ She was never in Pippin, Show Boat, or Cabaret? ♪ 290 00:13:17,202 --> 00:13:20,743 ♪ She didn't sign autographs at a stage door‐a? 291 00:13:20,810 --> 00:13:25,620 ♪ She worked at the Herald Square Sephora? 292 00:13:25,686 --> 00:13:28,124 ♪ Lost hope, gave up and moved the day 293 00:13:28,191 --> 00:13:31,598 ♪ She didn't get a callback for Hairspray ♪ 294 00:13:31,665 --> 00:13:34,170 ♪ She's a fraudway baby ♪ 295 00:13:34,236 --> 00:13:35,773 ♪ A phony, a fake ♪ 296 00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:39,614 ♪ She ain't got what it takes ♪ 297 00:13:39,681 --> 00:13:41,484 ♪ She's a fraudway baby ♪ 298 00:13:41,552 --> 00:13:43,923 ♪ She doesn't know Sutton Foster 299 00:13:43,989 --> 00:13:45,492 ♪ This broad's an imposter ♪ 300 00:13:45,560 --> 00:13:48,799 ♪ She's had you wrapped around her finger 301 00:13:48,866 --> 00:13:50,502 ♪ For days ♪ 302 00:13:50,570 --> 00:13:53,107 ♪ But she's nothing but a hair‐extentioned 303 00:13:53,174 --> 00:13:55,045 ♪ Makeup‐slinging, Botox‐forehead 304 00:13:55,111 --> 00:13:56,113 ♪ Lying, cheating ♪ 305 00:13:56,180 --> 00:13:57,180 ♪ Baby fraudway... ♪ 306 00:14:05,600 --> 00:14:07,269 So you don't know the people 307 00:14:07,336 --> 00:14:10,041 you said you knew but who are they? 308 00:14:10,108 --> 00:14:11,912 Marge Bouvier, you're... 309 00:14:11,979 --> 00:14:13,214 mean! 310 00:14:16,655 --> 00:14:20,262 Well, I'm sure you're all as angry at Sasha as I am, 311 00:14:20,328 --> 00:14:22,399 but now we can wipe the slate clean 312 00:14:22,466 --> 00:14:25,806 and really come together as a theater family. 313 00:14:25,873 --> 00:14:28,177 Without Sasha, there's no show. 314 00:14:28,244 --> 00:14:31,952 You ruined everything, you... techie! 315 00:14:32,019 --> 00:14:34,056 But, w‐w‐wait. She made it all up. 316 00:14:34,123 --> 00:14:35,793 She's a liar! 317 00:14:35,860 --> 00:14:37,730 I think this is the kind of thing 318 00:14:37,797 --> 00:14:41,571 that makes people not want to invite you to stuff. 319 00:14:48,652 --> 00:14:50,990 Stupid, ungrateful cast. 320 00:14:51,057 --> 00:14:52,960 Did you sleep at all last night? 321 00:14:53,027 --> 00:14:54,931 "We don't care that Sasha's a liar." 322 00:14:54,998 --> 00:14:56,768 "We still love her more than you." 323 00:14:56,835 --> 00:14:59,306 Mo‐om! Bart replaced my Kashi cereal 324 00:14:59,373 --> 00:15:01,878 with woodchips from the hamster cage! 325 00:15:01,945 --> 00:15:04,183 So? You didn't notice till I told you. 326 00:15:04,249 --> 00:15:05,720 ‐ 327 00:15:05,786 --> 00:15:07,990 - What's wrong with Mom? - Well, kids, your mother has 328 00:15:08,057 --> 00:15:10,896 severely pissed off all the theater weirdos‐‐ 329 00:15:10,963 --> 00:15:12,199 of which I am now one‐‐ 330 00:15:12,265 --> 00:15:14,671 but she can't see it's her fault. 331 00:15:14,738 --> 00:15:16,575 So... are you gonna tell her? 332 00:15:16,641 --> 00:15:21,384 Indeed I am, and there's only one way to do it. 333 00:15:24,289 --> 00:15:26,293 ♪ When your partner's in a tizzy 334 00:15:26,360 --> 00:15:28,231 ♪ Flossing till she's dizzy ♪ 335 00:15:28,297 --> 00:15:31,337 ♪ Clearly in the wrong, but certain she's right 336 00:15:31,404 --> 00:15:33,942 ♪ It's your responsibility ♪ 337 00:15:34,009 --> 00:15:35,579 ♪ To imply her culpability ♪ 338 00:15:35,646 --> 00:15:39,052 ♪ In a way that doesn't instigate a fight 339 00:15:39,119 --> 00:15:42,192 ‐ ‐Whoops. 340 00:15:42,259 --> 00:15:44,798 ♪ Don't escalate the situation ♪ 341 00:15:44,864 --> 00:15:46,434 ♪ Or add further complication ♪ 342 00:15:46,500 --> 00:15:49,506 ♪ Mince your words, so as never to encroach 343 00:15:50,643 --> 00:15:52,078 ♪ Deliver your advice ♪ 344 00:15:52,145 --> 00:15:53,682 ♪ But make sure to do it nice ♪ 345 00:15:53,749 --> 00:15:57,155 ♪ For it's best to use a delicate approach 346 00:15:58,057 --> 00:15:59,828 Marge, darling... 347 00:15:59,894 --> 00:16:01,397 Leave me alone! 348 00:16:01,464 --> 00:16:03,669 Marge, listen! I'm being delicate! 349 00:16:03,735 --> 00:16:05,505 Oh, are you? 350 00:16:06,507 --> 00:16:08,747 ♪ Now, I know you may think you were just in your actions 351 00:16:08,812 --> 00:16:10,883 ♪ But it makes my heart sink to see your infractions 352 00:16:10,950 --> 00:16:12,830 ♪ Your feelings were hurt, but it's malice you blurt 353 00:16:12,854 --> 00:16:15,559 ♪ Your transaction compels a retraction 354 00:16:17,930 --> 00:16:19,634 Oh, you're right, Homie. 355 00:16:19,701 --> 00:16:21,070 It's all my fault. 356 00:16:21,136 --> 00:16:24,309 I did the one thing 357 00:16:24,376 --> 00:16:27,415 I put myself before the show. 358 00:16:28,518 --> 00:16:29,518 You see, kids? 359 00:16:29,554 --> 00:16:32,259 ♪ It's best to use a delicate ♪ 360 00:16:32,325 --> 00:16:33,695 ♪ Approach. ♪ 361 00:16:35,064 --> 00:16:36,868 I have to make things right. 362 00:16:36,935 --> 00:16:38,204 You need to let me see 363 00:16:38,271 --> 00:16:41,277 the cast‐only text chain. 364 00:16:41,343 --> 00:16:42,547 Yeah, I don't know. 365 00:16:42,613 --> 00:16:45,018 It's really not cool for me to share it. 366 00:16:45,084 --> 00:16:47,557 Plus, you wouldn't get any of the jokes. 367 00:16:47,623 --> 00:16:49,293 You might want to skip over the stuff 368 00:16:49,359 --> 00:16:50,663 with your name in it. 369 00:16:50,729 --> 00:16:51,998 Sasha hasn't left town. 370 00:16:52,065 --> 00:16:53,702 There's still time. 371 00:16:56,307 --> 00:16:58,210 Why would Marge do that to me? 372 00:16:58,277 --> 00:17:00,181 I was never mean to her. 373 00:17:00,248 --> 00:17:01,718 I never even talked to her! 374 00:17:01,785 --> 00:17:04,691 Yeah, we don't care that you only sell makeup 375 00:17:04,757 --> 00:17:07,228 and that you're a huge liar. 376 00:17:07,295 --> 00:17:09,533 I miss high school. 377 00:17:09,601 --> 00:17:12,172 Remember the night of the cast party? 378 00:17:12,238 --> 00:17:15,445 You and me... in the hot tub? 379 00:17:15,511 --> 00:17:17,783 That night really happened? 380 00:17:17,850 --> 00:17:19,186 I thought I imagined it. 381 00:17:19,252 --> 00:17:20,756 It was real. 382 00:17:20,823 --> 00:17:23,294 And I've never had better. 383 00:17:23,361 --> 00:17:24,964 Ah... 384 00:17:25,031 --> 00:17:27,637 Sasha! Sasha, I'm so sorry. 385 00:17:27,703 --> 00:17:29,539 Once my husband sang and danced to me 386 00:17:29,607 --> 00:17:32,078 about what I did, I felt terrible. 387 00:17:32,145 --> 00:17:34,817 I acted like such a crazy teenager. 388 00:17:34,884 --> 00:17:37,455 All I wanted to do was recapture my glory days, 389 00:17:37,522 --> 00:17:39,927 when I could've become anything... 390 00:17:39,994 --> 00:17:41,430 instead of what I really am, 391 00:17:41,497 --> 00:17:43,935 a floor manager at Sephora. 392 00:17:45,138 --> 00:17:46,306 Sales associate. 393 00:17:46,373 --> 00:17:49,346 I guess we both wanted to be stars again. 394 00:17:50,148 --> 00:17:51,083 There she is. 395 00:17:51,150 --> 00:17:52,218 Probably called us here 396 00:17:52,285 --> 00:17:54,056 to expose the lies the rest of us put 397 00:17:54,122 --> 00:17:55,693 in our playbill bios. 398 00:17:55,759 --> 00:17:56,995 What lies? 399 00:17:57,062 --> 00:17:59,166 I am "thrilled to reprise my role 400 00:17:59,232 --> 00:18:01,671 - as Steve/ - Ensemble." 401 00:18:01,738 --> 00:18:03,809 I was supposed to manage the stage, 402 00:18:03,875 --> 00:18:07,182 but instead I just managed to screw everything up. 403 00:18:07,248 --> 00:18:09,186 But there's still time to put on the best show 404 00:18:09,252 --> 00:18:11,190 of the latter part of our lives. 405 00:18:11,256 --> 00:18:13,795 What do you say? Should we give it a try? 406 00:18:13,862 --> 00:18:15,198 Oh, why should we? 407 00:18:15,264 --> 00:18:18,437 What has trying ever gotten anyone? 408 00:18:21,911 --> 00:18:23,582 ♪ I could've been a crooner ♪ 409 00:18:23,648 --> 00:18:25,853 ♪ Star of stage and screen ♪ 410 00:18:25,919 --> 00:18:27,355 ♪ But I'd just as sooner ♪ 411 00:18:27,422 --> 00:18:31,063 ♪ Drink away my dream ♪ 412 00:18:31,130 --> 00:18:33,200 - ♪ Never try. ♪ - Stop! 413 00:18:33,267 --> 00:18:35,338 That's the saddest thing I've ever heard. 414 00:18:35,404 --> 00:18:39,680 Barney, nobody needs to do this show more than you. 415 00:18:39,747 --> 00:18:43,220 ♪ Except me! ♪ 416 00:18:43,287 --> 00:18:44,624 ‐ ‐Yay! 417 00:18:46,059 --> 00:18:48,097 It's a full house, so... 418 00:18:48,164 --> 00:18:51,036 ♪ Places, everybody. ♪ 419 00:18:51,103 --> 00:18:54,009 Marge, when I'm onstage and it's not my turn to talk, 420 00:18:54,075 --> 00:18:56,548 - can I look at my phone? - No. 421 00:19:13,280 --> 00:19:14,784 It's almost midnight. 422 00:19:14,851 --> 00:19:16,420 What's going to happen? 423 00:19:20,228 --> 00:19:21,163 Oops. 424 00:19:21,230 --> 00:19:22,666 Five, four... 425 00:19:22,733 --> 00:19:25,639 Three, two, one! 426 00:19:27,442 --> 00:19:29,747 ‐ ‐So the show just ends? 427 00:19:29,814 --> 00:19:30,916 What a cop‐out! 428 00:19:30,983 --> 00:19:32,720 At least at the endof Rent you get to see 429 00:19:32,786 --> 00:19:34,289 Mimi come back to life. 430 00:19:34,356 --> 00:19:36,193 This is just lazy. 431 00:19:36,260 --> 00:19:39,332 - ♪ ♪ - 432 00:19:41,470 --> 00:19:44,409 Marge, thanks for reminding me how good it feels 433 00:19:44,476 --> 00:19:46,714 to be a big fish in a small pond. 434 00:19:46,781 --> 00:19:48,885 I guess that's why you never left. 435 00:19:48,952 --> 00:19:50,822 Actually, I think it was because my parents 436 00:19:50,889 --> 00:19:53,828 couldn't afford college after a lawsuit from a party 437 00:19:53,895 --> 00:19:56,466 you threw at my house but didn't invite me to. 438 00:19:56,533 --> 00:19:59,339 Such timey times. 439 00:20:03,380 --> 00:20:05,484 Oh, my God, it's really her. 440 00:20:05,552 --> 00:20:07,088 It's Marge Bouvier. 441 00:20:07,155 --> 00:20:09,727 Just ask her. 442 00:20:10,729 --> 00:20:13,033 Um, would you please sign my prompt bible? 443 00:20:14,302 --> 00:20:15,438 You know me? 444 00:20:15,504 --> 00:20:17,810 You're a stage‐managing icon! 445 00:20:20,582 --> 00:20:22,285 Would you go to the diner with us? 446 00:20:22,352 --> 00:20:24,389 We'd die to hear some of your stories. 447 00:20:24,456 --> 00:20:26,627 Invited to the diner. 448 00:20:26,694 --> 00:20:28,865 I'm getting cheese fries! 449 00:20:30,434 --> 00:20:32,171 Cast party at Marge's house! 450 00:20:32,238 --> 00:20:33,975 ‐ ‐All right! 451 00:20:34,042 --> 00:20:35,779 Theater! 452 00:20:49,139 --> 00:20:52,679 - Y2 - K ♪ Five, four, three, two, zero, zero, zero 453 00:20:52,746 --> 00:20:54,249 ♪ A new millennium ♪ 454 00:20:54,315 --> 00:20:57,155 ♪ But who will I be? ♪ 455 00:20:57,221 --> 00:20:59,125 ♪ Five, four, three, two ♪ 456 00:20:59,192 --> 00:21:01,463 ♪ Way too many zeros ♪ 457 00:21:01,530 --> 00:21:03,534 ♪ What will the computers ♪ 458 00:21:03,601 --> 00:21:05,271 ♪ Do to me? ♪ 459 00:21:05,337 --> 00:21:07,208 ♪ Will there be blackouts? ♪ 460 00:21:07,275 --> 00:21:08,545 ♪ Chaos? ♪ 461 00:21:08,611 --> 00:21:10,549 ♪ Motherboards exploding? ♪ 462 00:21:10,615 --> 00:21:12,686 ♪ Glitches and crashes? ♪ 463 00:21:12,753 --> 00:21:14,522 ♪ A run on the banks? ♪ 464 00:21:14,590 --> 00:21:16,526 ♪ Will I have a mortgage? ♪ 465 00:21:16,594 --> 00:21:19,567 ♪ A family? A boy and a girl? 466 00:21:19,633 --> 00:21:24,075 ♪ What happens to a two‐digit soul 467 00:21:24,142 --> 00:21:27,950 ♪ In a four‐digit world? ♪ 468 00:21:29,085 --> 00:21:31,022 Shh!