1 00:00:00,291 --> 00:00:01,875 (theme music playing) 2 00:00:01,959 --> 00:00:05,333 CHORUS: ♪ The Simpsons ♪ 3 00:00:07,458 --> 00:00:08,625 D'oh! 4 00:00:09,625 --> 00:00:11,125 (grunts) 5 00:00:11,208 --> 00:00:13,125 (violin music playing) 6 00:00:20,542 --> 00:00:22,208 I haven't seen you before. 7 00:00:22,291 --> 00:00:24,208 (shouts, blabbering) 8 00:00:24,291 --> 00:00:26,458 Yeah, we go around-- (muttering) jumping, jump, jump. 9 00:00:26,542 --> 00:00:28,542 Oh, we bouncy ba-- ha, ha. 10 00:00:28,625 --> 00:00:29,875 (mewing) 11 00:00:29,959 --> 00:00:32,041 Release the hounds. 12 00:00:32,125 --> 00:00:34,291 -(yelling) -(barking) 13 00:00:43,375 --> 00:00:47,375 I'm so excited Springfield finally has a vegan restaurant. 14 00:00:47,458 --> 00:00:49,834 I thought you'd enjoy this, Lisa. 15 00:00:49,917 --> 00:00:52,875 You deserve to have the food that only you like. 16 00:00:52,959 --> 00:00:55,083 Your St. Louis-style Baby Back Fibs, 17 00:00:55,166 --> 00:00:57,875 leg of yam and Wagyu beets. 18 00:00:57,959 --> 00:01:00,291 Dad, are you sure you're okay eating here? 19 00:01:00,375 --> 00:01:02,500 (chuckles) I can eat anything 20 00:01:02,583 --> 00:01:05,750 as long as I pretend it once had a face. 21 00:01:05,834 --> 00:01:08,000 -And eyes. -LISA: Ew. 22 00:01:08,083 --> 00:01:10,083 Why are you both kissing up to Lisa? 23 00:01:10,166 --> 00:01:12,583 (gasps) Is this her last meal? 24 00:01:12,667 --> 00:01:14,917 You're gonna want to look thin in your coffin, 25 00:01:14,959 --> 00:01:16,875 so I'll eat your dessert. 26 00:01:16,959 --> 00:01:19,500 Sure, have my dessert. You'll look like Dad. 27 00:01:19,583 --> 00:01:20,542 (shrieks) 28 00:01:20,625 --> 00:01:23,834 And for your information, we are not kissing up. 29 00:01:23,917 --> 00:01:26,250 By the way, Lisa, have you picked a subject yet 30 00:01:26,333 --> 00:01:29,166 for your "Most Interesting Person I Know" paper? 31 00:01:29,250 --> 00:01:31,083 Aha! Mystery solved. 32 00:01:31,166 --> 00:01:33,667 Once again, the school pits parents against each other. 33 00:01:33,750 --> 00:01:35,875 Homer, you're up. Sell yourself, dude. 34 00:01:35,959 --> 00:01:39,166 Lisa, hi. Homer Simpson. Longtime fan. 35 00:01:39,250 --> 00:01:41,667 Astronaut, sometime taxpayer. 36 00:01:41,750 --> 00:01:42,959 Oh, well, let's see, 37 00:01:43,041 --> 00:01:45,792 "The most interesting person I know is a white male." 38 00:01:45,875 --> 00:01:48,875 That'll go over great in today's climate. 39 00:01:48,959 --> 00:01:50,792 I hope you like blowback. 40 00:01:50,875 --> 00:01:53,709 Mom, Dad, I've made my decision. 41 00:01:53,792 --> 00:01:57,667 After a lot of soul-searching, I've decided to go with... 42 00:01:57,750 --> 00:01:58,834 -Ooh, ooh. -Please... 43 00:01:58,917 --> 00:02:01,917 -Frink! I'm writing about Professor Frink. -Who? 44 00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:05,291 You know. "Flavin, glayvin, hoyvik." 45 00:02:05,375 --> 00:02:07,375 That Coke bottle with teeth? 46 00:02:07,458 --> 00:02:11,208 He's devoted his life to helping the world through science. 47 00:02:11,291 --> 00:02:14,667 Say, uh, can you tell me if I came in second or third? 48 00:02:14,750 --> 00:02:16,709 It's best not to proceed down that road. 49 00:02:16,792 --> 00:02:20,792 Fine. Then I can end this little vegan charade. 50 00:02:22,834 --> 00:02:24,750 ♪ ♪ 51 00:02:28,458 --> 00:02:30,667 Professor Frink, I want to thank you so much 52 00:02:30,750 --> 00:02:33,166 for letting me visit you during office hours. 53 00:02:33,250 --> 00:02:35,166 His last visitor was the process server 54 00:02:35,250 --> 00:02:36,959 for the monkey who's suing him. 55 00:02:37,041 --> 00:02:38,375 Um, who's this? 56 00:02:38,458 --> 00:02:40,041 Oh, well, that's Professor Hessler. 57 00:02:40,125 --> 00:02:41,458 We share the space here. 58 00:02:41,542 --> 00:02:44,583 Pay her no mind. She's in the humanities. 59 00:02:44,667 --> 00:02:45,709 (groans) 60 00:02:45,792 --> 00:02:48,625 Mm. Professor Frink, I'd love to know 61 00:02:48,709 --> 00:02:51,041 how you got started in science. 62 00:02:51,125 --> 00:02:55,875 Oh, science? Well, I was created by science, my dear child. 63 00:02:55,959 --> 00:02:57,542 Oh. That was you? 64 00:02:57,625 --> 00:03:01,291 Uh, no, no, I was the world's second test-tube baby. 65 00:03:01,375 --> 00:03:04,667 Yes, I was greeted with far less fanfare. 66 00:03:04,750 --> 00:03:06,709 My parents had great chemistry. 67 00:03:06,792 --> 00:03:09,208 Uh, no love, but they were chemists. 68 00:03:09,291 --> 00:03:11,959 The only way I could get noticed was through science 69 00:03:12,041 --> 00:03:14,458 (intensifying) and changing the pitch of my voice 70 00:03:14,542 --> 00:03:17,709 so they couldn't help but notice me. 71 00:03:17,792 --> 00:03:20,583 But I never had my breakthrough. 72 00:03:20,667 --> 00:03:24,166 In a world of Einsteins, I'm a James Chadwick. 73 00:03:24,250 --> 00:03:26,083 -LISA: Who? -FRINK: Well, exactly. 74 00:03:26,166 --> 00:03:28,917 It's too bad your name isn't famous. 75 00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:31,875 All this will change, for I have been developing 76 00:03:31,959 --> 00:03:34,291 my own cryptocurrency. 77 00:03:34,375 --> 00:03:37,291 Oh. I have no idea what that means. 78 00:03:37,375 --> 00:03:39,500 What do they teach you at that school? 79 00:03:39,583 --> 00:03:41,250 How to get the teachers coffee. 80 00:03:41,333 --> 00:03:45,125 Yeah-- A-- Anyway, I will explain cryptocurrency by clicking 81 00:03:45,208 --> 00:03:50,667 a link to TV's most beloved scientist, Mr. Jim Parsons. 82 00:03:50,750 --> 00:03:52,083 People think I'm a nerd, 83 00:03:52,166 --> 00:03:54,000 but I'm actually super cool. 84 00:03:54,083 --> 00:03:56,542 That's why I'm here to talk about the really cool subject 85 00:03:56,625 --> 00:03:59,583 of distributed consensus-based cryptocurrency. 86 00:03:59,667 --> 00:04:00,542 Kachinga. 87 00:04:00,625 --> 00:04:02,500 (revving) 88 00:04:06,792 --> 00:04:09,208 Could a nerd do that? I don't think so. 89 00:04:09,291 --> 00:04:11,208 For cryptocurrency to work, we need a record 90 00:04:11,291 --> 00:04:13,083 of every transaction that occurs. 91 00:04:13,166 --> 00:04:16,333 These are recorded in what's called a distributed ledger. 92 00:04:16,417 --> 00:04:18,208 (singing) 93 00:04:41,709 --> 00:04:43,208 ♪ Oh, yeah ♪ 94 00:04:43,250 --> 00:04:44,917 When you use the currency, 95 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:47,542 the transaction is recorded in the ledger. 96 00:04:47,625 --> 00:04:49,792 (laughs) 97 00:04:49,875 --> 00:04:51,208 I can dig it. 98 00:04:51,291 --> 00:04:52,917 And when one ledger book gets filled up, 99 00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:55,208 we add to a "chain" of previous books. 100 00:04:55,291 --> 00:04:57,208 That's the "blockchain." 101 00:04:57,291 --> 00:04:58,542 Later, glitches. 102 00:04:58,625 --> 00:05:01,583 JIM: If you'd like to learn more about how cryptocurrencies work, 103 00:05:01,667 --> 00:05:04,291 here's everything else you need to know. 104 00:05:04,375 --> 00:05:07,500 And goodbye from me, super cool Jim Parsons. 105 00:05:09,375 --> 00:05:11,625 (gasps) It went in. It went in! It went in! 106 00:05:11,709 --> 00:05:13,875 It went in! It went in-- You saw it! It went in! 107 00:05:15,417 --> 00:05:19,166 So will Frinkcoin finally be the invention that makes me rich? 108 00:05:19,250 --> 00:05:20,625 Or w... (shouts) 109 00:05:20,709 --> 00:05:23,458 Well, uh, thank you for your support. 110 00:05:23,542 --> 00:05:26,542 Frinkcoin, the brainchild of longtime bachelor... 111 00:05:26,625 --> 00:05:29,583 of science, Professor Frink, is making a mint. 112 00:05:29,667 --> 00:05:31,792 Arnie Pye is live at the news conference. 113 00:05:31,875 --> 00:05:33,166 I don't know why, Kent. 114 00:05:33,250 --> 00:05:34,834 With all the layoffs, they've got me, 115 00:05:34,917 --> 00:05:37,291 the traffic guy, on the science beat. 116 00:05:37,375 --> 00:05:39,917 I just found out how a helicopter flies. 117 00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:41,458 It's terrifying! 118 00:05:41,542 --> 00:05:43,500 (chuckles) Well, whatever the heck that was, 119 00:05:43,583 --> 00:05:45,583 Frinkcoin was just rated the world's most stable 120 00:05:45,667 --> 00:05:47,291 financial instrument, beating gold, 121 00:05:47,375 --> 00:05:49,959 the renminbi and roadside corn. 122 00:05:50,041 --> 00:05:52,500 Well, can't eat no cryptocurrency 123 00:05:52,583 --> 00:05:54,083 when the grid goes down. 124 00:05:54,166 --> 00:05:56,625 That's why I started my hedge fund. 125 00:05:57,375 --> 00:05:58,792 (breathy laugh) 126 00:05:58,875 --> 00:05:59,750 (bird caws) 127 00:05:59,834 --> 00:06:02,417 Another billionaire? How did he make his money? 128 00:06:02,500 --> 00:06:04,417 Paraffin? Castor oil? 129 00:06:04,500 --> 00:06:07,125 Whalebone corsets for the woman who dares? 130 00:06:07,208 --> 00:06:09,208 Actually, cryptocurrency. 131 00:06:09,291 --> 00:06:11,500 Oh, I know about cryptocurrency. 132 00:06:11,583 --> 00:06:12,875 I have it in my crypt. 133 00:06:12,959 --> 00:06:15,041 No, sir, this is a new kind of digital currency, 134 00:06:15,125 --> 00:06:16,417 based on blockchain. 135 00:06:16,500 --> 00:06:19,542 Oh, I know all about blockchain. 136 00:06:21,583 --> 00:06:23,583 Again, not what you're thinking. 137 00:06:25,291 --> 00:06:28,917 This new currency has made Professor Frink the richest man in Springfield. 138 00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:33,333 Wait. Are you saying I am no longer the richest man in town? 139 00:06:33,417 --> 00:06:35,583 (sighs) I-- I'm afraid not, Monty. 140 00:06:40,250 --> 00:06:42,625 You have the gall to call me Monty? 141 00:06:42,709 --> 00:06:44,250 Just because you chew my food 142 00:06:44,333 --> 00:06:46,583 makes you think we're on a first-name basis? 143 00:06:46,667 --> 00:06:48,709 Of course not, sir. I'll never do that again. 144 00:06:48,792 --> 00:06:51,333 I will have my dinner now. 145 00:06:51,417 --> 00:06:53,000 Lobster Thermidor. 146 00:06:53,083 --> 00:06:54,834 -(lid clatters) -Start chewing. 147 00:06:54,917 --> 00:06:57,000 But, sir, I-- I'm allergic to shellfish. 148 00:06:57,083 --> 00:07:00,375 And I'm not, Wayland. 149 00:07:01,417 --> 00:07:02,417 (gulps) 150 00:07:02,500 --> 00:07:04,333 (gasping) 151 00:07:07,667 --> 00:07:09,792 JIM: In! It went in-- You saw it. It went in! 152 00:07:10,959 --> 00:07:12,750 (sighs, mutters) 153 00:07:13,750 --> 00:07:14,709 Hi, Professor. 154 00:07:14,792 --> 00:07:18,166 I wanted to see how you're enjoying your newfound fame and wealth. 155 00:07:18,250 --> 00:07:21,083 He hasn't invested in deodorant. I can tell you that much. 156 00:07:21,166 --> 00:07:25,250 Well, the first ten million went to pay off student loans. 157 00:07:25,333 --> 00:07:27,083 Oh, yes, strange, strange. 158 00:07:27,166 --> 00:07:30,333 I have the fame and fortune I've always desired and yet, 159 00:07:30,417 --> 00:07:34,333 I'm-- Well, I'm as empty as a Dewar vacuum flask. 160 00:07:34,417 --> 00:07:36,125 (air whooshing) 161 00:07:36,208 --> 00:07:38,542 Well, maybe it's time to take care of yourself now. 162 00:07:38,625 --> 00:07:40,709 What are the things that you've always wanted? 163 00:07:40,792 --> 00:07:43,750 Oh, let's see, I've always wanted one of those pens 164 00:07:43,834 --> 00:07:45,625 with the four different colors. 165 00:07:45,709 --> 00:07:47,583 I fashioned one myself, but it's, uh, 166 00:07:47,667 --> 00:07:50,458 it's a tad bit unwieldy. 167 00:07:53,542 --> 00:07:56,417 You can get those pens, and so much more. 168 00:07:56,500 --> 00:07:59,458 Do they make a silencer for his constant nasal whistle? 169 00:07:59,542 --> 00:08:02,125 (whistles) Well, you know what? 170 00:08:02,208 --> 00:08:05,625 You will never have to worry about my adenoidal hiss again. 171 00:08:05,709 --> 00:08:07,375 (whistles) 172 00:08:07,458 --> 00:08:09,125 (whistling) 173 00:08:09,208 --> 00:08:10,750 I can still hear it! 174 00:08:10,834 --> 00:08:13,250 He's in Chicago, for God's sake! 175 00:08:13,333 --> 00:08:16,083 Moe, Lisa has offered to pay my bar tab. 176 00:08:16,166 --> 00:08:18,333 You do accept Frinkcoin, right? 177 00:08:18,417 --> 00:08:21,500 I'll accept any currency except the Albanian lek. 178 00:08:21,583 --> 00:08:23,333 I sunk everything I had into it, 179 00:08:23,417 --> 00:08:26,166 and now I ain't got two qindarkas to rub together. 180 00:08:26,250 --> 00:08:29,166 But that Frink, man, boy, he's sure got it made. 181 00:08:29,250 --> 00:08:31,041 Yeah, I wonder what he's doing now. 182 00:08:32,500 --> 00:08:34,875 I said I wonder what he's doing now! 183 00:08:36,041 --> 00:08:37,000 (knocking) 184 00:08:37,083 --> 00:08:38,750 Yes, come in. 185 00:08:38,834 --> 00:08:40,959 So, are you happier? 186 00:08:41,041 --> 00:08:43,583 No. No-- I got everything I wanted. 187 00:08:43,667 --> 00:08:46,667 Even the pen. But I'm-- I'm still sad. 188 00:08:46,750 --> 00:08:48,500 Aw, poor guy. 189 00:08:49,291 --> 00:08:50,542 -(gasps) -What? 190 00:08:50,625 --> 00:08:53,375 That's just Amazon delivery. Calm yourself. 191 00:08:53,458 --> 00:08:56,625 You should've seen poor Professor Frink, Dad. 192 00:08:56,709 --> 00:08:59,041 Poor Frink? He's the richest guy in town. 193 00:08:59,125 --> 00:09:02,583 But he's not rich in the most important thing there is. 194 00:09:02,667 --> 00:09:04,709 Health? (slurping) 195 00:09:04,792 --> 00:09:06,458 (grunting) 196 00:09:06,542 --> 00:09:07,375 Oh, yeah. 197 00:09:07,458 --> 00:09:09,917 No. The most important thing is friends. 198 00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:12,959 Dad, you should take Professor Frink to Moe's. 199 00:09:13,041 --> 00:09:15,875 Oh, I can't do that. It's like having your mother's sisters 200 00:09:15,959 --> 00:09:17,125 come for a visit. 201 00:09:17,208 --> 00:09:19,417 Actually, they're coming in 20 minutes. 202 00:09:19,500 --> 00:09:20,875 Taking Frink to Moe's. 203 00:09:22,667 --> 00:09:25,125 Never seen a fat man move so fast. 204 00:09:25,333 --> 00:09:26,542 Got a cigarette? 205 00:09:26,625 --> 00:09:28,625 Not since we moved to Disney. 206 00:09:30,000 --> 00:09:31,917 All right, next question-- Hey! Pay attention. 207 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:36,208 Name a drink made from hops and barley. 208 00:09:36,291 --> 00:09:38,041 Barley hops? 209 00:09:38,125 --> 00:09:39,542 No. 210 00:09:39,625 --> 00:09:41,917 -Meryl Streep? -Good guess, but no. 211 00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:43,500 Uh, hey, guys, 212 00:09:43,583 --> 00:09:47,625 I was wondering if my friend Professor Frink and I could join you? 213 00:09:47,709 --> 00:09:49,709 All right, but we've been playing a long time. 214 00:09:49,792 --> 00:09:52,959 Don't expect to just come in and join a wall of trivia champs. 215 00:09:53,041 --> 00:09:55,959 FRINK: Well-- Oh, my goodness, well, no one... 216 00:09:56,041 --> 00:09:57,709 -(bell dings) -The Bay City Rollers, 217 00:09:57,792 --> 00:09:59,375 Ed "Too Tall" Jones, 218 00:09:59,458 --> 00:10:01,375 the cronut and ring-a-levio, 219 00:10:01,458 --> 00:10:04,166 also known as ring-o-lario on Staten Island, 220 00:10:04,250 --> 00:10:06,542 but those people are, well, they're quite backward. 221 00:10:06,625 --> 00:10:08,959 -All correct. -(cheering) 222 00:10:09,041 --> 00:10:12,125 I'm "Too Tall" Jones, and even I didn't know the answer was me. 223 00:10:15,667 --> 00:10:18,500 -Sir? -Oh, it's "sir" now, is it? 224 00:10:18,583 --> 00:10:21,500 Not "Monty" or "Queen B"? 225 00:10:21,583 --> 00:10:23,125 (chuckles) No, sir. 226 00:10:23,208 --> 00:10:25,542 And I really appreciate the long, healthy walk 227 00:10:25,625 --> 00:10:27,083 from my new parking spot. 228 00:10:27,166 --> 00:10:29,333 -(wind whistling) -(bird caws) 229 00:10:29,417 --> 00:10:31,166 Get in all 10,000 steps. 230 00:10:31,250 --> 00:10:33,041 Good, the two things I can't take 231 00:10:33,125 --> 00:10:35,583 are insubordination and a slight breeze. 232 00:10:35,667 --> 00:10:37,750 -(wind whooshing) -(groaning) 233 00:10:37,834 --> 00:10:40,000 Mm, yeah. Uh, sir, to make you the wealthiest man 234 00:10:40,083 --> 00:10:41,583 in town again, I've assembled a team 235 00:10:41,667 --> 00:10:44,000 of the greatest mathematicians and cryptographers 236 00:10:44,083 --> 00:10:45,458 to ever leave their rooms. 237 00:10:45,542 --> 00:10:48,083 They're here to develop... Burnscoin. 238 00:10:48,166 --> 00:10:49,750 Will there be actual coins? 239 00:10:49,834 --> 00:10:53,250 If so, make sure they're made from something men must die mining. 240 00:10:53,333 --> 00:10:55,834 Is there an ivory that comes from people? 241 00:10:55,917 --> 00:10:58,375 So, here are the programmers working on your currency. 242 00:10:58,458 --> 00:11:01,625 And I've discovered some serious issues with this nuclear plant. 243 00:11:01,709 --> 00:11:03,875 By my calculations, the cracks in the coolant pipes 244 00:11:03,959 --> 00:11:05,458 are growing exponentially. 245 00:11:05,542 --> 00:11:09,250 Smithers, give this poindexter a McKinley Rub. 246 00:11:09,333 --> 00:11:11,709 (groaning) 247 00:11:11,792 --> 00:11:14,375 Now, listen here, you magna cum losers! 248 00:11:14,458 --> 00:11:16,291 You are here for one reason and one reason only, 249 00:11:16,375 --> 00:11:19,834 to create a pseudo currency like the Bitcoin or the peso 250 00:11:19,917 --> 00:11:21,250 that will make me rich. 251 00:11:21,333 --> 00:11:23,625 So rich I could buy ten NFL teams. 252 00:11:23,709 --> 00:11:24,959 Not the Jets. 253 00:11:25,041 --> 00:11:28,458 Okay, people, laptops open, headphones on, Red Bulls popped. 254 00:11:28,542 --> 00:11:30,125 We'll get this, Monty. 255 00:11:30,208 --> 00:11:32,375 (steam hissing) 256 00:11:32,458 --> 00:11:35,792 Uh, I mean, I'm a sick man, sir. I'll get help. 257 00:11:35,875 --> 00:11:39,375 Wayland, I think what you're doing comes out of anger. 258 00:11:39,458 --> 00:11:41,041 Are you upset with Mr. Burns? 259 00:11:41,125 --> 00:11:43,834 -No. -Please, you're safe here. 260 00:11:43,917 --> 00:11:47,000 Oh, the things I've done for that hollow-boned horror show! 261 00:11:47,083 --> 00:11:49,583 That interview he did for Vanity Fair? 262 00:11:49,667 --> 00:11:51,250 I wrote all his answers. 263 00:11:51,333 --> 00:11:53,834 Like he would ever spend a weekend in Santa Barbara. 264 00:11:53,917 --> 00:11:55,959 I'm the one who loves Sideways-- me! 265 00:11:56,041 --> 00:11:58,000 Does anyone have any thoughts about how Wayland 266 00:11:58,083 --> 00:11:59,458 can approach these feelings? 267 00:11:59,542 --> 00:12:00,750 You? Oh, I'm sorry. 268 00:12:00,834 --> 00:12:02,125 I-- I don't know your name yet. 269 00:12:02,208 --> 00:12:04,834 Well, I learned in dealing with Bruce Willis that-- 270 00:12:04,917 --> 00:12:06,458 (exclaims) I'm sorry! 271 00:12:06,542 --> 00:12:09,458 Whenever I say his name I expect a phone to be thrown at me. 272 00:12:09,542 --> 00:12:10,750 -Christian Bale. -Roseanne. 273 00:12:10,834 --> 00:12:11,875 -Jared Leto. -Roseanne! 274 00:12:11,959 --> 00:12:13,000 -Katherine Heigl. -Trump. 275 00:12:13,083 --> 00:12:14,375 -Trump. -Roseanne! 276 00:12:14,458 --> 00:12:16,333 Wayland, I'm going to write you a prescription 277 00:12:16,417 --> 00:12:17,500 for Sychophantanyl. 278 00:12:17,583 --> 00:12:20,291 Take one every time you feel like saying what you really think. 279 00:12:20,375 --> 00:12:22,250 (sighs) Thank you. 280 00:12:22,333 --> 00:12:24,834 -(phone buzzing) -I just got a text. 281 00:12:24,917 --> 00:12:26,792 Anyone here who works for Mariah Carey, 282 00:12:26,875 --> 00:12:30,375 meet her at SoulCycle and bring a kitten... now! 283 00:12:30,667 --> 00:12:31,792 (kittens meow) 284 00:12:31,875 --> 00:12:34,125 -(cheering) -Listen, Professor, 285 00:12:34,208 --> 00:12:36,041 why-- why are we hanging around Moe's Tavern 286 00:12:36,125 --> 00:12:37,709 when we could be somewhere good? 287 00:12:37,792 --> 00:12:39,875 Fear not, my new best friends. 288 00:12:39,959 --> 00:12:43,959 I will take you on a tour of Springfield's finest establishments. 289 00:12:44,041 --> 00:12:47,333 Come on, let's go. It'll be joyous, and raucous, and other things. 290 00:12:47,417 --> 00:12:48,750 Three cheers for Frink! 291 00:12:48,834 --> 00:12:51,000 Actually, studies show that one and a half 292 00:12:51,083 --> 00:12:53,542 is the optimum number of cheers, so... 293 00:12:53,625 --> 00:12:54,875 ALL: Hip hip hooray! 294 00:12:54,959 --> 00:12:56,625 -Hip hip-- -And done. 295 00:12:56,709 --> 00:12:57,917 FRINK: ♪ If you're poor ♪ 296 00:12:58,000 --> 00:12:59,959 ♪ And find yourself outside the door ♪ 297 00:13:00,041 --> 00:13:02,625 ♪ Just ask me to buy your drink ♪ 298 00:13:04,083 --> 00:13:05,750 ♪ Hangin' with the Frink ♪ 299 00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:10,250 ♪ Clink my link, you'll swim, not sink ♪ 300 00:13:10,333 --> 00:13:12,667 ♪ Here is my pitch, come on, be rich ♪ 301 00:13:12,750 --> 00:13:14,917 ♪ Hey, what's to think ♪ 302 00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:16,750 ♪ Hangin' with the Frink ♪ 303 00:13:18,291 --> 00:13:20,375 ♪ Ah, yeah! ♪ 304 00:13:20,458 --> 00:13:22,917 This Frink has been gold peacocking all over town. 305 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:26,041 What's taking you Slide Rule Charlies so long? 306 00:13:26,125 --> 00:13:29,750 We aren't able to create a cryptocurrency as powerful as the Frinkcoin. 307 00:13:29,834 --> 00:13:34,834 But... this equation, if solved, could make all digital coins worthless. 308 00:13:34,917 --> 00:13:37,417 -Including Frink's. -Excellent. 309 00:13:37,500 --> 00:13:39,125 How long will it take to solve? 310 00:13:39,208 --> 00:13:41,875 Well, if we work weekends and bring in some extra help, 311 00:13:41,959 --> 00:13:43,709 I'd say 90,000 years. 312 00:13:43,792 --> 00:13:45,917 -Uh-huh, uh, yeah, uh-huh. -Yeah, mm-hmm. 313 00:13:45,959 --> 00:13:47,291 -Bah! -Ow. Ow. 314 00:13:47,375 --> 00:13:48,375 -Ow. Ow. -Ah. 315 00:13:48,458 --> 00:13:49,458 Get out! 316 00:13:49,542 --> 00:13:51,875 (straining) 317 00:13:51,959 --> 00:13:53,792 As for Frink, if I can't break his bank, 318 00:13:53,875 --> 00:13:55,625 I'll break his spirit. 319 00:13:55,709 --> 00:13:57,667 (groaning) 320 00:13:57,750 --> 00:13:59,000 (ship horn blows) 321 00:13:59,083 --> 00:14:01,458 Amazing, Professor! 322 00:14:01,542 --> 00:14:03,583 -You win again! -(helicopter whirring) 323 00:14:03,667 --> 00:14:07,208 (exclaims) This is my only suit of clothes! 324 00:14:07,291 --> 00:14:09,166 Ahoy-hoy! I was in the neighborhood 325 00:14:09,250 --> 00:14:11,000 and thought we might have a drink. 326 00:14:11,083 --> 00:14:13,041 You know, billionaire to billionaire. 327 00:14:14,750 --> 00:14:17,625 Oh, I just love champagne that's been in space, don't you? 328 00:14:17,709 --> 00:14:21,041 Now, listen to me, your friends don't give a whit about you. 329 00:14:21,125 --> 00:14:24,166 That is not true! Those guys are my best buddies! 330 00:14:24,250 --> 00:14:27,834 Fatso and Drunky and the evil bartender there. 331 00:14:27,917 --> 00:14:29,792 Well, think about this, Professor. 332 00:14:29,875 --> 00:14:31,542 The curse of wealth is that you will never, 333 00:14:31,625 --> 00:14:35,625 ever again know if anyone truly likes you. 334 00:14:35,709 --> 00:14:40,208 Oh, my, could it be that they're, well, they're really just leeches? 335 00:14:42,125 --> 00:14:44,041 (grunts) 336 00:14:44,333 --> 00:14:46,417 Hmm. Mm. 337 00:14:46,500 --> 00:14:48,208 (whistles) 338 00:14:48,291 --> 00:14:50,625 (sighs) Oh, evil gundah... 339 00:14:52,792 --> 00:14:56,458 Frink interview, final chapter, "Happily Ever After." 340 00:14:56,542 --> 00:14:58,750 I'm just so unbelievably sad. 341 00:14:58,834 --> 00:15:02,083 I mean, is he right? Do I really have no true friends? 342 00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:06,250 ROBOT: Come get some. 343 00:15:06,333 --> 00:15:08,375 Don't worry about what Mr. Burns says. 344 00:15:08,500 --> 00:15:12,709 He's a vicious old viper who knows nothing of the human heart. 345 00:15:12,792 --> 00:15:13,792 Oh, and you do? 346 00:15:13,875 --> 00:15:15,750 Well, I've seen a lot for an eight-year-old. 347 00:15:15,834 --> 00:15:18,792 My parents have split up nearly a thousand times. 348 00:15:18,875 --> 00:15:21,625 My brother is a scab on society's knee. 349 00:15:21,709 --> 00:15:24,250 And every time I get a pony or make a friend, 350 00:15:24,333 --> 00:15:26,208 they get the hell out of town. 351 00:15:26,291 --> 00:15:28,291 Wow, you have lived quite a life. 352 00:15:28,375 --> 00:15:30,291 Yeah, it's not all bad. 353 00:15:30,375 --> 00:15:31,834 I had a jazz friend. 354 00:15:31,917 --> 00:15:33,959 (sighs) Who died. 355 00:15:34,041 --> 00:15:35,208 (slurping) 356 00:15:35,291 --> 00:15:36,709 BURNS: Here's my plan, Smithers. 357 00:15:36,792 --> 00:15:38,458 We put the equation here. 358 00:15:38,542 --> 00:15:41,458 And the ingenuity of crowds will solve it for us by tomorrow, 359 00:15:41,542 --> 00:15:44,959 thus rendering all cryptocurrency worthless. 360 00:15:45,041 --> 00:15:47,625 -Well, what if they don't? -Don't worry, Smithers. 361 00:15:47,709 --> 00:15:51,125 If this doesn't work, I'll get some of my old Yale buddies in. 362 00:15:51,208 --> 00:15:53,458 Well, they're dead and their children are dead, sir. 363 00:15:53,542 --> 00:15:55,667 Oh, my. 364 00:15:55,750 --> 00:15:57,709 Mm? Hmm. 365 00:15:57,792 --> 00:15:59,625 Someone's gonna solve that? 366 00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:03,083 This town is so dumb, they built an indoor wind farm. 367 00:16:03,166 --> 00:16:06,834 They're so dumb, they need a recipe to make ice! 368 00:16:06,917 --> 00:16:08,500 Stay in your lane, Mel! 369 00:16:08,583 --> 00:16:10,417 You've given me no lane! 370 00:16:10,500 --> 00:16:12,375 Eh, at least it's not another billboard 371 00:16:12,458 --> 00:16:15,166 complaining about crimes I haven't solved. 372 00:16:15,250 --> 00:16:17,375 (dramatic music playing) 373 00:16:28,083 --> 00:16:30,375 Who would do this, Lou? Who? 374 00:16:33,083 --> 00:16:36,792 All my life, I believed in the scientific meth-od. 375 00:16:36,875 --> 00:16:39,667 I need proof that my friends actually are... 376 00:16:39,750 --> 00:16:41,709 (clears throat) uh, uh, friends. 377 00:16:41,792 --> 00:16:42,667 (door creaks) 378 00:16:42,750 --> 00:16:44,500 Hey, Professor. 379 00:16:44,583 --> 00:16:47,959 Boy, I can't wait to sit in the skybox for the big game today. 380 00:16:48,041 --> 00:16:50,709 I'm gonna have chicken and popcorn and never watch the game. 381 00:16:50,792 --> 00:16:52,500 Well, I'm so sorry, change in plans. 382 00:16:52,583 --> 00:16:56,834 You see, the skybox wasn't available, so I got regular tickets. 383 00:16:56,917 --> 00:16:58,709 Oh, that reminds me. 384 00:16:58,792 --> 00:17:00,125 I need to have a cyst removed. 385 00:17:00,208 --> 00:17:01,709 Now's as good a time as any. 386 00:17:01,792 --> 00:17:04,792 Yeah, and I got to be there to say, uh, "Do not resuscitate." 387 00:17:04,875 --> 00:17:06,166 Do resuscitate! 388 00:17:06,250 --> 00:17:08,750 Ah, uh, I really should write that down. 389 00:17:12,083 --> 00:17:13,750 (door creaks) 390 00:17:13,834 --> 00:17:17,166 All right, now, now, the experiment is not yet complete. 391 00:17:17,250 --> 00:17:18,375 Let's just see here. 392 00:17:18,458 --> 00:17:21,333 (laughter) 393 00:17:21,417 --> 00:17:23,333 Oh, Professor, you kill me! 394 00:17:23,417 --> 00:17:27,125 I never heard such a crazy bunch of nonsense talk. 395 00:17:27,208 --> 00:17:29,583 Yeah, I-- I was speaking Mandarin Chinese. 396 00:17:30,417 --> 00:17:34,208 So... this time, would one of you be so kind as to, uh... 397 00:17:35,959 --> 00:17:38,083 No one outsmarts ol' Gil. 398 00:17:38,166 --> 00:17:40,250 (exclaims) Ooh, hot, hot, hot! 399 00:17:40,333 --> 00:17:41,375 Cha-cha! 400 00:17:43,625 --> 00:17:45,417 Well, that's it, from now on, 401 00:17:45,500 --> 00:17:48,250 my only company will be AI, I insist. 402 00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:50,709 ROBOT: My first independent thought is 403 00:17:50,792 --> 00:17:53,291 -I dislike you. -(groans) 404 00:17:53,375 --> 00:17:55,125 ♪ ♪ 405 00:18:01,250 --> 00:18:03,625 Oh, thank God you woke me. 406 00:18:03,709 --> 00:18:05,500 I was having a terrible dream. 407 00:18:05,583 --> 00:18:06,625 Oh, about what? 408 00:18:06,709 --> 00:18:08,542 All the awful things I've done. 409 00:18:08,625 --> 00:18:09,875 Oh, I knew you shouldn't have had 410 00:18:09,959 --> 00:18:13,208 that second blueberry at dinner, but this is why I brought you. 411 00:18:13,291 --> 00:18:15,250 Look, someone posted a solution on the whiteboard. 412 00:18:15,333 --> 00:18:16,583 Frink is ruined! 413 00:18:16,667 --> 00:18:18,917 ♪ ♪ 414 00:18:20,750 --> 00:18:23,208 This problem has been speared in the head, 415 00:18:23,291 --> 00:18:26,250 hauled on the deck, and sliced up the guts, 416 00:18:26,333 --> 00:18:28,250 eh, mathematically speaking. 417 00:18:28,333 --> 00:18:29,417 Yarr. 418 00:18:29,500 --> 00:18:31,917 So, who found the solution? 419 00:18:32,959 --> 00:18:34,792 Did I do it? 420 00:18:34,875 --> 00:18:36,250 No... 421 00:18:36,333 --> 00:18:37,834 Hmm, I guess we'll never know. 422 00:18:37,917 --> 00:18:39,333 The important thing is that once again, 423 00:18:39,417 --> 00:18:44,709 I am the richest man in a town of 32,000 people. 424 00:18:44,792 --> 00:18:45,917 Excellent. 425 00:18:46,375 --> 00:18:48,750 ♪ ♪ 426 00:18:54,667 --> 00:18:57,166 And so, the equation was solved. 427 00:18:57,250 --> 00:18:59,959 Solved by the one person who could solve it, 428 00:19:00,041 --> 00:19:02,166 Professor John Frink. 429 00:19:02,250 --> 00:19:03,458 End of report. 430 00:19:04,000 --> 00:19:05,083 How did you know? 431 00:19:05,166 --> 00:19:07,875 A girl learns a lot writing a second grade report. 432 00:19:07,959 --> 00:19:11,166 I knew that you'd be willing to throw away everything you had, 433 00:19:11,250 --> 00:19:13,041 because it didn't mean anything. 434 00:19:13,125 --> 00:19:16,500 And I had a pretty good idea of what your handwriting looks like. 435 00:19:16,583 --> 00:19:19,709 Also, anyone else smart enough to solve this 436 00:19:19,792 --> 00:19:22,083 is too smart to come to Springfield. 437 00:19:22,166 --> 00:19:27,000 Well, you really understand me. Young lady, you are my best friend. 438 00:19:27,083 --> 00:19:28,208 Hoyvik. 439 00:19:28,291 --> 00:19:30,000 Aw, really? 440 00:19:30,083 --> 00:19:34,291 Well, beware, I lose everything I care about. 441 00:19:34,375 --> 00:19:37,959 Well, you won't lose me. I'll always be right here. 442 00:19:38,041 --> 00:19:39,834 In this flash drive. 443 00:19:39,917 --> 00:19:43,000 I will treasure this forever. 444 00:19:43,083 --> 00:19:44,625 (chuckling) 445 00:19:44,709 --> 00:19:47,750 I had a billion dollars-- what have I done? 446 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:53,667 Ugh. Ten glorious days of peace. 447 00:19:53,750 --> 00:19:55,834 I was able to finish my dissertation. 448 00:19:55,917 --> 00:20:00,542 Losing a billion dollars means nothing as long as I see you again. 449 00:20:04,166 --> 00:20:05,542 Are we gonna do this? 450 00:20:06,500 --> 00:20:07,500 (grunts) 451 00:20:07,583 --> 00:20:08,917 (both moaning) 452 00:20:10,917 --> 00:20:12,625 (nose whistling) 453 00:20:13,667 --> 00:20:16,166 (moaning continues) 454 00:20:16,250 --> 00:20:18,166 ♪ ♪ 455 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:22,333 ♪ Thanks for the currency ♪ 456 00:20:22,417 --> 00:20:24,500 ♪ All my dollar bills ♪ 457 00:20:24,583 --> 00:20:27,208 ♪ Piled up to the hills ♪ 458 00:20:27,291 --> 00:20:29,875 ♪ Ruble, pound, or Deutschmark ♪ 459 00:20:29,959 --> 00:20:32,750 ♪ You all give me such thrills ♪ 460 00:20:32,834 --> 00:20:36,041 Didn't I fight alongside you in the war? 461 00:20:36,125 --> 00:20:38,333 Um, we weren't on the same side, 462 00:20:38,417 --> 00:20:40,834 but I was there. (chuckles) 463 00:20:41,625 --> 00:20:42,709 (grunts) 464 00:20:42,792 --> 00:20:44,166 Ooh, much better. 465 00:20:45,375 --> 00:20:47,375 ♪ Thanks ♪ 466 00:20:47,458 --> 00:20:49,625 ♪ For the currency ♪ 467 00:20:49,709 --> 00:20:51,875 ♪ We watched it rise and fall ♪ 468 00:20:51,959 --> 00:20:54,166 FRINK: ♪ But we both had a ball ♪ 469 00:20:54,250 --> 00:20:56,959 BOTH: ♪ We made this song so long ♪ 470 00:20:57,041 --> 00:20:59,291 ♪ It spilled into the crawl ♪ 471 00:20:59,375 --> 00:21:00,709 FRINK: Hoyvik. 472 00:21:28,166 --> 00:21:29,917 -(murmuring) -Shh!