1
00:00:02,127 --> 00:00:04,796
辛普森家庭

2
00:00:08,466 --> 00:00:09,676
你好，老大

3
00:00:09,759 --> 00:00:12,637
你好幾週沒去郵箱收信了

4
00:00:12,721 --> 00:00:15,306
不，沒去收信

5
00:00:15,390 --> 00:00:20,270
錯過特價廣告或陪審團徵招怎麼辦？

6
00:00:20,353 --> 00:00:24,149
我沒有紙本電子信要怎麼活？

7
00:00:25,191 --> 00:00:27,277
我懂，但別為難我，兄弟

8
00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:28,445
清空信箱

9
00:00:29,529 --> 00:00:32,574
畢竟也在大太陽下烤了好久

10
00:00:32,699 --> 00:00:33,992
我想也該熟了

11
00:00:43,168 --> 00:00:44,419
郵餅

12
00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:51,217
快切開，切一大塊給我

13
00:00:51,301 --> 00:00:53,094
誰要尾巴那塊？

14
00:00:56,306 --> 00:00:57,348
（派對）

15
00:00:57,515 --> 00:01:00,393
我受邀參加艾蒂的生日會

16
00:01:00,477 --> 00:01:01,519
艾蒂？

17
00:01:01,603 --> 00:01:03,104
我怎麼不認識這個朋友

18
00:01:03,188 --> 00:01:04,731
她是教哪一科的？

19
00:01:04,814 --> 00:01:06,316
她是小孩

20
00:01:06,399 --> 00:01:07,692
我也認識小孩

21
00:01:07,776 --> 00:01:10,403
是在艾蒂家的過夜派對

22
00:01:10,487 --> 00:01:13,573
艾蒂，在圖書館認識的

23
00:01:14,365 --> 00:01:16,242
圖書館，瑪姬

24
00:01:16,701 --> 00:01:21,331
只有我倆喜歡＂飛馳女孩＂那套舊書

25
00:01:25,585 --> 00:01:27,462
舊書味　　　　舊書味

26
00:01:29,339 --> 00:01:31,216
新友味

27
00:01:37,347 --> 00:01:39,641
為什麼女生都喜歡馬？

28
00:01:39,724 --> 00:01:42,060
是因為男生搶了其他好動物

29
00:01:42,143 --> 00:01:43,645
像是狗和忍者嗎？

30
00:01:43,770 --> 00:01:45,897
馬是大自然的禮讚

31
00:01:45,980 --> 00:01:51,152
完美結合了力量，優雅和可編的長髮

32
00:01:51,486 --> 00:01:53,404
蠢，蠢，笨

33
00:01:53,488 --> 00:01:54,697
腳不能動

34
00:01:55,448 --> 00:01:56,324
粉紅色？

35
00:01:56,407 --> 00:02:01,830
車一旦被發明，幹嘛不撞死所有馬？

36
00:02:01,913 --> 00:02:03,373
滾開，需要暑修補課的人

37
00:02:03,456 --> 00:02:04,833
馬型直升機攻擊

38
00:02:04,916 --> 00:02:06,835
它會丟炸彈

39
00:02:09,879 --> 00:02:10,964
放開她

40
00:02:11,047 --> 00:02:13,758
她曾受虐，害怕男性

41
00:02:17,387 --> 00:02:19,013
我的展示圍場

42
00:02:21,391 --> 00:02:23,059
這在搞什麼馬戲團

43
00:02:24,185 --> 00:02:25,270
馬戲團

44
00:02:25,353 --> 00:02:27,355
瑪姬，你猜我說了什麼

45
00:02:27,438 --> 00:02:28,189
繼續打

46
00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:31,943
你為什麼總是要摧毀我在乎的東西？

47
00:02:32,026 --> 00:02:35,446
哥哥應該要會照顧人又親切

48
00:02:35,697 --> 00:02:37,824
真希望能跟你解除兄妹關係

49
00:02:37,907 --> 00:02:40,285
要也是我先跟你解除兄妹關係

50
00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:41,786
隨便

51
00:02:41,870 --> 00:02:46,624
以安全剪刀為證，我就此剪斷兄妹情

52
00:02:47,500 --> 00:02:48,626
一刀兩斷

53
00:03:00,221 --> 00:03:01,598
你們看那豪宅

54
00:03:01,681 --> 00:03:03,892
我打賭他們的車庫是用來停車的

55
00:03:06,227 --> 00:03:08,605
馬兒生日會　　　　馬兒生日會

56
00:03:08,688 --> 00:03:10,815
你家好大

57
00:03:10,899 --> 00:03:12,817
對，其實說來尷尬

58
00:03:12,901 --> 00:03:17,030
我爸獨家供應體育場和大教堂番茄醬

59
00:03:17,155 --> 00:03:18,865
她顯然在說謊

60
00:03:18,948 --> 00:03:21,201
番茄醬明明不要錢

61
00:03:21,284 --> 00:03:22,202
假裝配合一下

62
00:03:22,327 --> 00:03:23,661
你好，我是瑪姬

63
00:03:23,745 --> 00:03:26,706
麗莎期待貴千金的生日派對好久了

64
00:03:26,873 --> 00:03:28,750
不，我是派對策劃

65
00:03:28,833 --> 00:03:32,795
媽媽正忙著竄改成績好送兒子上名校

66
00:03:33,213 --> 00:03:35,798
好好玩，我們明天見

67
00:03:35,882 --> 00:03:38,218
十點鐘來接人，道別和領謝禮

68
00:03:38,301 --> 00:03:41,095
他們有錢到能預知未來

69
00:03:41,387 --> 00:03:43,389
我剛讀完那本＂飛馳女孩＂

70
00:03:43,473 --> 00:03:44,974
喬治華盛頓的馬

71
00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,977
踢爆班尼狄克阿諾的馬是叛徒

72
00:03:58,821 --> 00:04:01,157
我本想給你一個驚喜

73
00:04:01,241 --> 00:04:03,451
我們家剛好有養馬

74
00:04:07,997 --> 00:04:11,960
麗莎在過夜派對，爺爺顧著另外兩隻

75
00:04:12,043 --> 00:04:13,962
我們又在碼頭附近

76
00:04:14,045 --> 00:04:16,089
我才不要去找你弄丟的太陽眼鏡

77
00:04:16,172 --> 00:04:17,423
都六年了

78
00:04:17,507 --> 00:04:18,549
早就不在了

79
00:04:18,633 --> 00:04:21,469
你總說我不會替我們安排計畫

80
00:04:21,552 --> 00:04:24,889
來個夕陽遊船之旅如何？

81
00:04:25,390 --> 00:04:29,143
我只在夕陽遊船雜誌上讀過這行程

82
00:04:29,519 --> 00:04:31,396
他們還有現場音樂演出

83
00:04:31,521 --> 00:04:34,232
這樂團本來要在藍尼的婚宴表演

84
00:04:34,315 --> 00:04:36,317
若他沒有在教堂被防狼噴霧攻擊

85
00:04:36,484 --> 00:04:40,697
我都忘了你努力的樣子有多英俊

86
00:04:45,159 --> 00:04:46,869
別擔心，若你墜馬

87
00:04:46,953 --> 00:04:49,580
背心會自動充氣保護你

88
00:04:49,664 --> 00:04:50,999
拉緊韁繩

89
00:04:51,082 --> 00:04:53,418
太陽花希望你能領導牠

90
00:04:57,714 --> 00:04:59,132
怎麼回事，艾蒂森？

91
00:04:59,215 --> 00:05:00,633
你沒按讚我的發文

92
00:05:00,717 --> 00:05:02,051
你的大姆指廢了嗎？

93
00:05:03,469 --> 00:05:04,595
大姆指廢了？

94
00:05:04,679 --> 00:05:08,433
泰莎蘿絲，你好棒，超級棒的

95
00:05:10,101 --> 00:05:12,395
沒錯，那是有史以來最好笑的笑話

96
00:05:12,478 --> 00:05:13,855
我笑到停不下來了

97
00:05:14,188 --> 00:05:16,566
艾蒂森，她為何盯著我們看？

98
00:05:16,649 --> 00:05:18,109
艾蒂森？

99
00:05:18,318 --> 00:05:20,778
你喜歡別人這樣稱呼你？

100
00:05:22,697 --> 00:05:24,532
這是我的閨蜜團

101
00:05:24,657 --> 00:05:27,035
你大概在社群網站上看過她們

102
00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:30,538
這是貝拉艾拉，聚友網的富二代

103
00:05:30,621 --> 00:05:32,206
思瓏，英國人

104
00:05:32,373 --> 00:05:36,294
再來當然就是，網紅美人泰莎蘿絲

105
00:05:36,377 --> 00:05:37,879
她是不是好惹人厭？

106
00:05:39,922 --> 00:05:42,592
對了，各位，這是麗莎

107
00:05:42,675 --> 00:05:44,510
她就是她

108
00:05:44,594 --> 00:05:46,137
很高興認識大家

109
00:05:46,471 --> 00:05:47,930
麻煩你冷靜一點

110
00:05:48,014 --> 00:05:49,432
我很冷靜

111
00:05:49,515 --> 00:05:51,017
別再大吼了

112
00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:52,310
我沒有大吼

113
00:05:52,393 --> 00:05:54,228
同色調女孩

114
00:05:54,312 --> 00:05:58,983
我可不想理那種穿搭這麼沒創意的人

115
00:05:59,067 --> 00:06:00,193
你真逗

116
00:06:00,276 --> 00:06:02,070
我要被你笑死了

117
00:06:08,785 --> 00:06:12,121
你的朋友們看來跟你好不同

118
00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:16,417
那個人一直說好笑的人根本沒在笑

119
00:06:16,584 --> 00:06:17,752
她笑不出來

120
00:06:17,835 --> 00:06:20,505
她媽媽懷孕時打了太多肉毒桿菌

121
00:06:20,588 --> 00:06:21,756
真幸運

122
00:06:21,839 --> 00:06:24,967
我知道她們看來成群結黨、高傲又…

123
00:06:25,051 --> 00:06:26,010
惡劣？

124
00:06:26,094 --> 00:06:28,930
對，但她們一旦接納你

125
00:06:29,013 --> 00:06:32,183
你會發現她們其實人不錯

126
00:06:32,266 --> 00:06:35,269
很好，原來她們不惡毒

127
00:06:35,353 --> 00:06:37,522
我差點錯怪她們了

128
00:06:37,605 --> 00:06:38,689
真是好險

129
00:06:41,609 --> 00:06:45,613
這些能掩蓋我喝康普茶宿醉

130
00:06:45,863 --> 00:06:47,657
那是我在城市裡買的

131
00:06:47,740 --> 00:06:49,367
我指的是紐約

132
00:06:49,450 --> 00:06:50,827
紐約市？

133
00:06:50,910 --> 00:06:53,413
我會做筆記，記在本子裡

134
00:06:53,496 --> 00:06:54,789
我是指筆記本

135
00:06:56,040 --> 00:06:58,042
一個手機殼

136
00:06:58,126 --> 00:06:59,544
適用於新的賣瘋

137
00:06:59,627 --> 00:07:02,088
沒有按鍵，而且鏡頭只能面對你

138
00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:03,840
根本不是人用的

139
00:07:03,923 --> 00:07:05,341
不如看看我的禮物？

140
00:07:09,971 --> 00:07:14,142
還有一頂能罩在牠耳朵上的小草帽

141
00:07:15,184 --> 00:07:16,894
她送她一個玩具

142
00:07:16,978 --> 00:07:18,521
有附贈尿布嗎？

143
00:07:18,604 --> 00:07:21,941
我的老天，我笑到不能呼吸了

144
00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:23,401
這能倒出仿曬劑嗎？

145
00:07:23,484 --> 00:07:25,111
還是能移除仿曬劑？到底裝了什麼？

146
00:07:25,194 --> 00:07:26,362
這算哪門子化妝品？

147
00:07:26,446 --> 00:07:29,115
但你喜歡，對吧，艾蒂？

148
00:07:29,198 --> 00:07:31,409
好可愛

149
00:07:33,369 --> 00:07:35,705
對小寶寶來說

150
00:07:43,671 --> 00:07:46,674
（水手之樂）

151
00:07:46,757 --> 00:07:48,009
（麗莎，家裡聰明的那個）

152
00:07:48,217 --> 00:07:50,094
這裡收訊不清楚，甜心

153
00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:52,138
派對還好嗎？

154
00:07:52,305 --> 00:07:53,764
不好玩

155
00:07:53,848 --> 00:07:56,642
我不想留下，我想回家

156
00:07:56,726 --> 00:07:58,436
好玩

157
00:07:58,519 --> 00:08:00,438
我不想回家

158
00:08:00,521 --> 00:08:02,815
感謝你毫無新意的報備

159
00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:04,025
麗莎還好嗎？

160
00:08:04,108 --> 00:08:06,611
玩得開心到不想回家

161
00:08:06,694 --> 00:08:08,112
聽起來超開心

162
00:08:09,989 --> 00:08:11,032
（傳給爸爸：你不懂）

163
00:08:11,073 --> 00:08:11,991
（來接我吧）

164
00:08:13,701 --> 00:08:14,577
（你懂吧）

165
00:08:14,660 --> 00:08:17,205
你說得對，老爸完全懂

166
00:08:17,288 --> 00:08:18,706
老爸的功用就是如此

167
00:08:18,789 --> 00:08:20,041
（來接我吧，＂訊息未傳送＂）

168
00:08:20,374 --> 00:08:21,709
我被困住了

169
00:08:21,792 --> 00:08:23,085
整夜

170
00:08:23,669 --> 00:08:24,921
要跟她們一起

171
00:08:32,178 --> 00:08:34,680
泰勒絲的模仿秀不來了是什麼意思？

172
00:08:34,764 --> 00:08:37,016
現在那些女孩要朝誰扔蛋糕出氣？

173
00:08:37,683 --> 00:08:39,894
得救了，你是這裡唯一的大人

174
00:08:39,977 --> 00:08:42,104
我想回家，你能幫我嗎？

175
00:08:42,188 --> 00:08:45,775
不行，這過夜派對得要有完美出席率

176
00:08:45,858 --> 00:08:48,361
我不能回去阿甘蝦餐廳工作

177
00:08:48,444 --> 00:08:49,862
他們賣的根本不是蝦

178
00:08:50,404 --> 00:08:53,199
小闆娘們，誰想去參觀香水實驗室

179
00:08:53,282 --> 00:08:55,701
並創立自己的女性商業帝國？

180
00:08:57,036 --> 00:09:01,207
你噴了什麼，超飢渴阿嬤嗎？

181
00:09:03,042 --> 00:09:04,627
人家才２６歲

182
00:09:08,631 --> 00:09:11,801
我們來追新一季的＂感謝主我死了＂

183
00:09:11,884 --> 00:09:14,887
＂感謝主我死了＂這齣超紅的

184
00:09:14,971 --> 00:09:18,057
我把蓮達的葬禮放在我的願景板上

185
00:09:18,224 --> 00:09:20,101
爸媽不准我看那節目

186
00:09:20,184 --> 00:09:22,395
因為內容美化不當行為

187
00:09:22,478 --> 00:09:24,814
沒關係，眼睛閉上就好

188
00:09:27,149 --> 00:09:28,067
（警告：本節目內容不適合青少年）

189
00:09:28,150 --> 00:09:29,193
（幼兒觀賞後可能惡夢連連）

190
00:09:29,819 --> 00:09:33,239
警語，我們懂，這節目超棒

191
00:09:36,492 --> 00:09:40,079
她死後，終於大受歡迎了

192
00:09:40,371 --> 00:09:43,207
我要邀請她的鬼魂去參加舞會

193
00:09:50,214 --> 00:09:51,966
有人要爆紅了

194
00:09:52,049 --> 00:09:54,218
寶寶的影片超受歡迎的

195
00:09:54,677 --> 00:09:58,097
（泰莎蘿絲＂麗莎寶寶＂）

196
00:10:04,395 --> 00:10:05,271
（麗莎來電）

197
00:10:05,354 --> 00:10:07,732
我想我可以一輩子停留

198
00:10:07,815 --> 00:10:11,444
拜託別趕我回家

199
00:10:32,506 --> 00:10:33,674
你躲在這裡幹嘛？

200
00:10:33,758 --> 00:10:35,676
這是外燴人員的廁所

201
00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:38,220
這日系馬桶是我今晚聽到的

202
00:10:38,304 --> 00:10:39,722
第一個溫柔聲音

203
00:10:39,805 --> 00:10:42,141
無法鎖定屁股

204
00:10:42,224 --> 00:10:44,352
艾蒂，你為何邀請我來參加派對？

205
00:10:44,435 --> 00:10:45,728
只為了折磨我嗎？

206
00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:47,229
好吧

207
00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:49,690
全盤托出，我邀請你是因為

208
00:10:49,774 --> 00:10:51,942
那些女孩對我總是超惡毒

209
00:10:52,026 --> 00:10:55,655
但她們把目標轉向你，改讓我加入

210
00:10:55,738 --> 00:10:58,407
感謝你讓這變成有史以來最棒的生日

211
00:10:59,950 --> 00:11:03,162
等等，才不好，這太糟糕了

212
00:11:03,287 --> 00:11:05,039
不，你還不懂嗎？

213
00:11:05,122 --> 00:11:07,208
下次，你請另外一個麗莎來

214
00:11:07,291 --> 00:11:10,836
某個樂團社或科學社的人

215
00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:15,424
我們圍攻她，你就會變成閨蜜的一員

216
00:11:15,549 --> 00:11:18,678
不，這不可能是你的本性

217
00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:20,429
我來幫你美白牙齒，麗莎

218
00:11:20,513 --> 00:11:21,722
我有貼片

219
00:11:21,806 --> 00:11:22,765
（微笑款式）

220
00:11:23,516 --> 00:11:26,477
貼片，麗莎，回來，我有美白貼片

221
00:11:28,729 --> 00:11:31,190
又回到老人５００賽車

222
00:11:31,273 --> 00:11:34,068
但他打滑跌入死人股溝

223
00:11:36,821 --> 00:11:38,322
爺爺，是我麗莎

224
00:11:38,406 --> 00:11:39,615
我需要你的幫助

225
00:11:39,699 --> 00:11:40,574
怎麼了，魯蛇？

226
00:11:40,658 --> 00:11:43,703
你的頭被馬咬掉，因此痛哭嗎？

227
00:11:45,621 --> 00:11:46,539
我就知道

228
00:11:46,706 --> 00:11:49,375
派對上的女孩對我好壞

229
00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:51,961
沒人幫我，我只想回家

230
00:11:52,169 --> 00:11:55,214
我也想幫你，但我們解除了兄妹關係

231
00:11:55,297 --> 00:11:58,384
現在我只是磁化你薩克斯風的陌生人

232
00:12:00,678 --> 00:12:04,724
拜託，你心中一定還有一絲兄妹之情

233
00:12:04,807 --> 00:12:08,185
我求你看在那絲情分上幫幫我

234
00:12:08,310 --> 00:12:10,563
回撥給我，用正常的聲音說

235
00:12:16,694 --> 00:12:18,696
快把我救出去

236
00:12:18,779 --> 00:12:21,991
你們看，這個怪咖在講手機

237
00:12:22,074 --> 00:12:24,994
手機是用來滑的，怪咖

238
00:12:25,244 --> 00:12:27,371
霸子，她們要搶走我的手機

239
00:12:27,455 --> 00:12:29,081
她們比你更惡劣

240
00:12:36,881 --> 00:12:39,216
你是璜史塔諾堤？

241
00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:40,968
快開車

242
00:12:43,304 --> 00:12:45,514
璜，今晚要去哪玩嗎？

243
00:12:45,598 --> 00:12:47,641
去輸入的地址

244
00:12:47,725 --> 00:12:48,768
我喜歡你，璜

245
00:12:48,851 --> 00:12:51,020
你顯然很怡然自得

246
00:12:51,103 --> 00:12:53,230
要來瓶室溫氣泡水嗎？

247
00:12:53,314 --> 00:12:55,775
我有指定要少話的司機

248
00:12:56,150 --> 00:12:58,152
（西蒙，給我評分）

249
00:12:58,360 --> 00:13:00,946
喂，快還我

250
00:13:01,071 --> 00:13:03,616
好噁心，這支手機是賽百味做的

251
00:13:03,699 --> 00:13:05,075
我爸為了這手機

252
00:13:05,159 --> 00:13:07,870
吃了１０００個１２吋潛艇堡

253
00:13:08,078 --> 00:13:08,788
喂

254
00:13:11,457 --> 00:13:14,835
別再勾引我老婆，你這歌唱海盜淫賊

255
00:13:15,294 --> 00:13:18,297
那個藍髮婦人身後的小妞是你老婆？

256
00:13:20,299 --> 00:13:21,717
厲害，兄弟

257
00:13:21,801 --> 00:13:25,179
好吧，我就別擋路了

258
00:13:31,143 --> 00:13:33,646
這下是教訓你不勾引我老婆

259
00:13:37,900 --> 00:13:38,943
歌單

260
00:13:39,109 --> 00:13:40,736
所有笑話都在上面

261
00:13:40,820 --> 00:13:42,363
我們會彈哪些歌？

262
00:13:51,914 --> 00:13:54,708
沒有酒精，還遊什麼船

263
00:13:54,875 --> 00:13:57,169
老兄，音樂被你毀了

264
00:13:57,253 --> 00:13:58,462
還有氣氛

265
00:13:58,546 --> 00:14:00,965
死亡時間，晚間１０點１３分

266
00:14:06,011 --> 00:14:07,346
（馬術公開賽）

267
00:14:18,315 --> 00:14:19,859
謝謝你…

268
00:14:19,942 --> 00:14:22,486
在她們發現我離開前我們快閃吧

269
00:14:22,611 --> 00:14:25,072
這個過夜派對還沒結束

270
00:14:25,197 --> 00:14:27,867
當然是，等我們離開就結束了

271
00:14:27,908 --> 00:14:30,077
聽好，我不是來這拯救你的

272
00:14:30,286 --> 00:14:32,788
若你現在選擇逃避，就只能永遠逃避

273
00:14:32,872 --> 00:14:33,747
你是什麼意思？

274
00:14:33,831 --> 00:14:37,126
你還得給那些富家女獻上一份大禮

275
00:14:37,751 --> 00:14:39,086
復仇

276
00:14:39,169 --> 00:14:40,588
復仇？

277
00:14:41,046 --> 00:14:42,214
（泰莎蘿絲＂派對掃興鬼＂）

278
00:14:42,381 --> 00:14:43,757
復仇

279
00:14:48,679 --> 00:14:50,806
好喔，對，復仇

280
00:14:50,890 --> 00:14:53,642
對，我能做到，我要怎麼做？

281
00:14:53,809 --> 00:14:54,977
我無法言述

282
00:14:55,060 --> 00:14:57,646
真實的復仇只能從你心中的仇恨迸發

283
00:14:58,981 --> 00:14:59,940
仇恨

284
00:15:03,319 --> 00:15:05,863
若你編得夠緊，會有拉皮的效果

285
00:15:05,988 --> 00:15:08,657
我的老天，我可以假裝成六歲

286
00:15:10,492 --> 00:15:12,536
我知道該怎麼做了

287
00:15:24,882 --> 00:15:26,717
（馬蹄硬化劑）

288
00:15:33,557 --> 00:15:34,099
（媽媽來電）

289
00:15:35,643 --> 00:15:36,560
喂，媽媽

290
00:15:36,685 --> 00:15:38,687
我發現你打來好多次

291
00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:40,147
一切還好嗎？

292
00:15:40,230 --> 00:15:41,899
對，一切都好，我愛你，晚安

293
00:15:42,524 --> 00:15:44,234
至少她玩得很開心

294
00:15:45,569 --> 00:15:49,907
你不僅隨便喧擾鬧事更壞了我的酒興

295
00:15:49,990 --> 00:15:52,785
沒錯，我就要你兩罪併罰

296
00:15:52,952 --> 00:15:55,704
我和老婆期待這趟行程好久了

297
00:15:55,788 --> 00:15:57,748
你破壞了我們的計畫

298
00:15:59,833 --> 00:16:00,834
計畫？

299
00:16:00,918 --> 00:16:03,796
對，我們都愛做計畫，對吧？

300
00:16:03,879 --> 00:16:06,382
晚餐和電影，夫妻卡拉ＯＫ

301
00:16:06,465 --> 00:16:09,802
球賽之夜，其實主辦只想賣安麗

302
00:16:09,885 --> 00:16:10,886
（安麗）

303
00:16:10,970 --> 00:16:14,348
我們都好渴望離開家門

304
00:16:14,431 --> 00:16:15,349
但是為什麼呢？

305
00:16:15,432 --> 00:16:20,020
就為了手拿假鬍子排隊拍照嗎？

306
00:16:22,314 --> 00:16:26,652
這些神奇計畫本該製造浪漫氣氛

307
00:16:26,777 --> 00:16:30,906
但你回家後，覺得又累又噁心又蒼老

308
00:16:31,031 --> 00:16:33,575
所以只好夜復一夜地做計畫

309
00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:35,244
如此惡性循環

310
00:16:35,327 --> 00:16:38,956
最後只能在半夜起床尿尿時觸碰老婆

311
00:16:39,039 --> 00:16:41,083
因為你沒發現她在馬桶上

312
00:16:41,166 --> 00:16:43,293
所以不小心坐在她身上

313
00:16:44,878 --> 00:16:47,131
我沒有毀掉這行程

314
00:16:47,214 --> 00:16:49,216
我拯救了你們的人生

315
00:16:49,466 --> 00:16:54,138
現在快回家，永遠別再做計畫了

316
00:17:08,068 --> 00:17:10,946
那個蛋頭怪咖惡搞我們的頭髮

317
00:17:12,865 --> 00:17:15,034
現在我們看起來跟她好像

318
00:17:17,911 --> 00:17:19,496
別擔心，我安排了車接送

319
00:17:23,250 --> 00:17:25,961
加成時段的機場接機行程？

320
00:17:26,045 --> 00:17:29,173
再見，古早式印表機，可以換新款了

321
00:17:29,256 --> 00:17:30,299
往這邊

322
00:17:40,809 --> 00:17:41,769
你先走吧

323
00:17:42,728 --> 00:17:46,231
你不討厭馬，你害怕牠們

324
00:17:46,356 --> 00:17:50,027
我只是討厭所有跟警察合作的動物

325
00:17:51,153 --> 00:17:53,155
動物不該有那麼發達的肌肉

326
00:17:53,405 --> 00:17:55,616
我害怕時你不讓我放棄

327
00:17:55,699 --> 00:17:57,034
所以我要幫你了解

328
00:17:57,117 --> 00:18:01,413
這高貴的動物有著溫柔的靈魂

329
00:18:02,081 --> 00:18:05,209
別從後面來，馬會踢爆你的臉

330
00:18:30,776 --> 00:18:33,821
我們會在所有社群網站上摧毀你

331
00:18:33,904 --> 00:18:37,366
你會孤立無援，吃壽司還得自己去拿

332
00:18:38,117 --> 00:18:39,118
沒有網路訊號？

333
00:18:39,201 --> 00:18:41,703
你的馬沒有移動熱點嗎，艾蒂森？

334
00:18:41,954 --> 00:18:42,871
艾蒂森

335
00:18:42,955 --> 00:18:45,290
我能跟我的書友艾蒂談談嗎？

336
00:18:46,834 --> 00:18:50,462
我必須成為艾蒂森，艾蒂只是個小孩

337
00:18:50,587 --> 00:18:52,673
記得我們一起讀書的時候嗎？

338
00:18:52,756 --> 00:18:56,093
我們只是孩子，分享彼此的愛好

339
00:18:56,385 --> 00:18:58,512
艾蒂森，她想影響你

340
00:18:58,595 --> 00:19:00,139
甚至不肯花錢收買

341
00:19:00,222 --> 00:19:03,517
我要在聖誕節清晨去掃蕩她家

342
00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:05,853
別讓這個怪咖激怒你

343
00:19:05,936 --> 00:19:07,354
先來顆軟糖

344
00:19:08,230 --> 00:19:10,274
做那個我心目中的女孩

345
00:19:14,486 --> 00:19:16,321
舊書味

346
00:19:16,488 --> 00:19:19,950
別抱著書，艾蒂森，你看起來像怪咖

347
00:19:21,160 --> 00:19:24,371
我的名字是艾蒂

348
00:19:28,083 --> 00:19:29,084
我的天

349
00:19:31,044 --> 00:19:31,962
快走

350
00:19:32,045 --> 00:19:34,965
跟我們走，這裡已不值得留戀

351
00:19:35,048 --> 00:19:36,175
這是我家

352
00:19:36,258 --> 00:19:37,426
我的東西都在這

353
00:19:37,509 --> 00:19:39,303
也對，沒錯

354
00:19:39,386 --> 00:19:42,681
好吧，那我們改天圖書館見

355
00:19:42,764 --> 00:19:43,849
麗莎？

356
00:19:44,057 --> 00:19:45,851
你是我收過最棒的禮物

357
00:19:48,478 --> 00:19:50,814
艾蒂森，你瘋了嗎？

358
00:19:50,898 --> 00:19:53,817
網飛該拍部你社交生活的影集

359
00:19:53,901 --> 00:19:56,153
因為你剛才玩死自己了

360
00:19:56,820 --> 00:19:58,947
她好惡毒

361
00:19:59,031 --> 00:20:01,575
我想跟她做朋友

362
00:20:01,658 --> 00:20:02,701
沒錯

363
00:20:18,800 --> 00:20:22,638
（威瑟樂團，辛普森家庭主題曲）

364
00:20:22,763 --> 00:20:25,098
（水手之樂專輯，片尾名單唱片）

365
00:21:13,522 --> 00:21:16,608
謝謝觀賞

366
00:21:16,692 --> 00:21:19,861
翻譯：ＳＤＩ　Ｍｅｄｉａ