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♪ The Simpsons ♪
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Ach!
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{\an8}Woo-hoo! TGI Monday.
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{\an8}Time to build my future
with the power of work.
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{\an8}Hey, Simpson. They got fresh
doughnuts in the break room.
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{\an8}No time for doughnuts.
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{\an8}I've gotta get to work. Work, work, work.
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{\an8}Look at that Homer Simpson.
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{\an8}He's the best kind of "holic": "worka."
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Hmm. Only two people ahead of me. Hmm.
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I'll be on top in no time.
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{\an8}Hmm.
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{\an8}Quitting time.
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{\an8}Whoa, whoa, lazy joe.
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{\an8}Not for 40 minutes.
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{\an8}Uh, who do you think you're fooling?
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{\an8}Sometimes the most important person
to fool is yourself.
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{\an8}Woo-hoo! Overtime.
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Huh?
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Hmm.
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What the-- I hired that cone.
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{\an8}What happened, Moe?
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{\an8}When did I go from an up-and-comer
to a guy who drinks other people's beer?
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{\an8}Hey, what happened to my beer?
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{\an8}- A leprechaun.
- Again?
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I used to have ambition, Moe.
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{\an8}What took it away?
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{\an8}Ah, it's a real mystery.
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{\an8}Here, let me pour you another pitcher.
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{\an8}You're a good man, Moe Szyslak.
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{\an8}Just doing God's work.
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{\an8}You know, you start with huge dreams,
but after 20 years at that plant,
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{\an8}all I've got is a big ball
of rubber bands.
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{\an8}For 20 years, that ball ain't so big.
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{\an8}You start out, you think you're gonna have
a big ball of rubber bands,
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then you realize you even failed at that.
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Oh, that's terribly sad.
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Hmm.
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Scooching over. Scooching, scooching.
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Too far.
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I share your disappointment, you see.
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Because by this point, I thought
I'd have won a prestigious research grant.
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Ha! I've never even won
in Words with Friends.
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I have the words
but not the friends, you see.
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Wow. I never knew
smart people could be unhappy.
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Oh, my. That's a tear.
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I have empathy which means that I am,
in fact, human,
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as I have long hypothesized.
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Y'ello.
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Homer Simpson?
I was wondering if you'd be interested in
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a job at the new nuclear plant
in Shelbyville.
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Me? Are you sure you don't want
somebody younger or more Lenny?
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No, you. I've never seen
a résumé like this.
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Technically, several of those jobs
were court-ordered.
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Works with law enforcement.
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Great. Texting you a link
for the interview.
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- It's on Zoom.
- Woo-hoo!
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Finally, a use for this ring light
I've been lugging around.
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Could this be it?
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The moment my life
finally changes for the better.
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Oh, Homie. This never would have happened
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if you hadn't been sitting in a bar
without your family.
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I'm your self-doubt,
and I say you're gonna screw it up.
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Well, I'm your ambition,
and I say you're gonna blow it.
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- Screw it up.
- Blow it.
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No one loves you.
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As usual, my imagination is right.
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I'll never get that job.
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Sir, I will help you
with the power of science.
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What does science have to do
with nuclear science?
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And why you?
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Well, as success stories go,
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I may not be an EGNOT...
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...but I can certainly help you.
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EGNOT? What's that?
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That's Emmy, Grammy, Nobel,
Oscar, Time Magazine subscriber.
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Although I do have
the easy one, of course.
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I have an Emmy.
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Me too.
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I use mine as corn holders.
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Marge, baby, when I get this job,
we're gonna be rich. Rich!
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It's okay, Homie.
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We're fine.
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Are we? I won't have a wife of mine
mending vacuum bags.
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You'll get new vacuum bags
and someday, maybe, a new vacuum.
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And handsome.
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{\an8}Hey, Dad. What you doing?
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Getting ready for my job interview.
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{\an8}What's Professor Frink doing here?
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{\an8}Aren't they just
supposed to interview you?
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Of course it's just me.
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Frink's here for moral support.
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{\an8}Well, why can't I give you moral support?
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Because your moral support
always comes with conditions.
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I shouldn't drink so much.
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I should stay alive so
I can see you graduate.
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Come on. Give up those dreams, kid.
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{\an8}- But--
- Give them up.
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{\an8}Okay.
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Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Hmm.
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{\an8}For 18 months, I led a team
at the Large Hadron Collider in Geneva.
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Homer, you're early.
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I'm still interviewing
another candidate, Dr. Spivak.
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I-I don't mind. I look even better
in comparison to other people.
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Doctor, let me interview Homer,
and, uh, I'll get back to you soon.
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Very soon.
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Maybe five seconds, that kind of soon.
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{\an8}Homer, let's start
with what you know about the NRC.
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NRC, NRC.
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Those are the gun nuts, right?
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Oh, dear.
As a fellow human, I want to help him,
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but that's unethical.
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But I am the kind of nerd
that always must blurt out the answer.
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Nuclear Regulatory Commission.
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- Yes.
- The Nuclear Regulatory Commission.
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Yes. They're important because...
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They're the government agency
for nuclear plants and materials,
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created by executive order
in 1975. Gluhavic.
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...they're the government agency
for nuclear plants and materials,
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created by executive order
in 1975. Gluhavic.
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Hmm. I didn't know that.
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Like an iceberg, there's more to you
than meets the eye.
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And like an iceberg, you probably
won't see me during the summer.
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Excellent. I love gentle humor.
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{\an8}And that's how a diffraction grating
disperses light
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{\an8}into components by wavelength.
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{\an8}Hoyvin moyvin physics.
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Homer, I must tell you this interview, uh,
was like my feet before glycerin cream,
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started rough but ended quite smooth.
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You have the job.
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Uh, ditto.
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You know that's my computer, right?
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Take it.
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- We did it!
- Huh-- Oh.
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Your brains and my listening
was the perfect combination.
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High four!
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And over, I go!
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- I can't believe I got the job.
- Well, that's wonderful.
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And of course, you will not be needing
my help any longer,
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so I wish you the best.
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Wait, wait, wait.
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Look, sir, the deal was
I would help you get the job. That's it.
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I didn't even ask for anything.
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My quid was woefully un-pro quo'd.
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You can't walk out on me now.
You know the saying,
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"If you get a man a job,
you feed him for a day.
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If you do a man's job,
you feed him for a lifetime."
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Now you want me to do your job for you?
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You're a fat, yellow banana slug, sir.
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Please.
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Fine, fine. I'll do your job.
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I'll do all of it.
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No, no, no, not all my job.
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Like my March Madness Bracket,
I'll handle that.
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You can't be trusted
with picking Baylor over Gonzaga.
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All right, I'll do that too.
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All right, Simpson, this is the 691st time
you've left us for another job.
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Yeah. Well, I have a good feeling
about this time.
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So, we finally said, "What the hell?"
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We have a form for everything
else around here, so why not this?
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{\an8}First, how long do you think
you'll be gone?
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As always, forever.
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"Forever."
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Mm-hmm.
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Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
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Hmm. Mmm.
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And finally in this instance,
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where would you like everyone here
to take this job and shove it?
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I'll let you pick.
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Now, all that's left is, uh,
for you to storm out dramatically.
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Don't tell me what to do!
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I quit!
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So, you need me to tell you what to do.
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But there's no way I can be
with you at the new job.
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So, I have engineered this.
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Just get it out here.
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This is the "Ear-a-no De Frink-a-talk."
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I named it myself.
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You see, it transmits my voice
right into your ear.
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So you can repeat my words like a parrot,
or a macaw or even my pet budgie.
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I'm in a cage, Professor.
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And even I have more fun than you.
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Wait a minute.
Weren't there two birds in that cage?
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I'm a cannibal.
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We Finns believe
the best employee is a rested employee.
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Now, it takes months before an employee
is comfortable sleeping at work.
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We-- Well, look at you.
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Huh?
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What? Occupied.
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There's that American can-sleep spirit.
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Now, let me show you the employee canteen.
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Oh, geez. I can't afford this.
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No, it's all free.
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Free? Who are you people?
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Well, in Finland,
we're not only experts on nuclear power,
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but for six years in a row,
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we've been
the happiest people in the world.
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Makes sense.
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You live so close to Santa Claus.
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Actually, our happiness is a combination
of Jante, low expectations,
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sisu, determination.
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Sisu?
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And kalsarikännit.
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Which is?
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Drinking at home in your underwear.
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Hmm.
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00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:05,813
Oh, my God.
I was kalsarikännit before it was cool.
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Holidays, Sundays,
football Mondays, phone-it-in Fridays.
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Magnificent.
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We also offer free day care,
bottomless hot chocolate
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and a roving squad of surprise masseuses.
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Oh! Oh!
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00:10:18,784 --> 00:10:22,371
Oh, is there anything Vikings can't do?
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Win the Super Bowl.
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And this is where you'll be working.
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You remember Dr. Spivak, don't you?
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They hired me as your assistant.
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Hey, you're the lady who thought
she was gonna get the job.
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No hard feelings?
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Well, certainly not to your face.
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Hmm. I'm sensing something
beneath that remark.
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Nothing I'll share with you,
until it's too late.
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That's cool. You'd be surprised how many
people talk to me in that tone of voice.
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I'm sure I would.
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Is it just me,
or are we getting along great?
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How was your first day?
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Marge, I tell you, for the first time
in my career, I feel like I've made it.
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There was nothing you couldn't handle?
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There was nothing you couldn't handle.
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There was nothing I couldn't handle.
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Mmm, I like the way you think
before you answer.
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Did you say "Frink" before I answer?
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00:11:18,719 --> 00:11:20,221
Now, why would you "Frink" that?
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00:11:20,221 --> 00:11:21,681
That's an odd way to put it,
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but I'll ignore it
because we finally have day care!
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00:11:25,476 --> 00:11:29,105
I can take a bath for as long as I want
in the middle of the day.
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I can floss once,
then throw it away like a movie star.
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00:11:33,317 --> 00:11:36,821
We can afford extra-virgin olive oil.
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00:11:36,821 --> 00:11:39,865
Maggie, I brought some food home
from work.
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00:11:39,865 --> 00:11:43,703
They're meatballs,
although they call them reindeer balls.
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Homer, this is it.
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We're moving to the upper-middle class.
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We might be able to pay bills
on the second notice.
244
00:11:55,381 --> 00:11:58,718
So I was thinking we should review
aseismic measures. What do you say?
245
00:11:58,718 --> 00:12:03,139
Uh, I believe we should begin
with analysis via computational models.
246
00:12:03,139 --> 00:12:06,892
Interesting. You alternate between
grasping for basic English
247
00:12:06,892 --> 00:12:08,811
and incredibly complex answers.
248
00:12:08,811 --> 00:12:11,063
You're like an idiot that ate a genius.
249
00:12:11,063 --> 00:12:14,567
Are you insulting my brains
or complimenting my appetite?
250
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:17,027
Clever.
Are you using a chatbot?
251
00:12:17,027 --> 00:12:19,655
Yes, but only for dirty limericks.
252
00:12:19,655 --> 00:12:21,782
"There once was a nerd from Caltech
253
00:12:21,782 --> 00:12:24,160
whose dating life was quite a wreck."
254
00:12:29,790 --> 00:12:33,586
Oh, that's dirty.
255
00:12:34,170 --> 00:12:35,921
I love this new job.
256
00:12:35,921 --> 00:12:39,091
People were looking at me with, um,
what's that word?
257
00:12:39,091 --> 00:12:41,177
Respect, lard butt.
258
00:12:41,177 --> 00:12:42,803
I'm happy for you too, Dad.
259
00:12:42,803 --> 00:12:46,891
But I'm curious how you're doing so well
at this job when, you know--
260
00:12:46,891 --> 00:12:49,351
Let's focus on the positives.
261
00:12:49,351 --> 00:12:52,605
I had time for three baths today.
262
00:12:52,605 --> 00:12:57,234
Well, if I can't say how I feel,
I'll just go to my room and sing a lament.
263
00:12:57,735 --> 00:13:01,906
♪ In a room a young girl sits ♪
264
00:13:01,906 --> 00:13:05,367
♪ And sings her sad lament ♪
265
00:13:07,077 --> 00:13:11,457
♪ 'Cause things are not
The same it seems ♪
266
00:13:11,457 --> 00:13:15,503
♪ As in such Simpson dreams ♪
267
00:13:16,504 --> 00:13:20,841
♪ Slowly passing days at school ♪
268
00:13:20,841 --> 00:13:24,637
♪ And Dad is changing jobs ♪
269
00:13:25,805 --> 00:13:30,059
♪ Working on the nukes with Finns ♪
270
00:13:30,684 --> 00:13:33,854
♪ Is not the place for him ♪
271
00:13:35,439 --> 00:13:39,527
♪ Why do these golden rainbows end? ♪
272
00:13:41,362 --> 00:13:44,907
- ♪ Why is this song so sad? ♪
- ♪ So sad ♪
273
00:13:44,907 --> 00:13:47,493
- ♪ Dreaming the dreams I dreamed alone... ♪
- Maybe I should go up to her.
274
00:13:47,493 --> 00:13:50,037
Marge, being sad makes her happy.
275
00:13:50,579 --> 00:13:53,999
Thank you both for...
...answering my email.
276
00:13:53,999 --> 00:13:56,502
It's always a pleasure
to meet nuclear colleagues.
277
00:13:56,502 --> 00:13:58,003
Thanks for inviting us.
278
00:13:58,003 --> 00:14:01,257
Where's Homer? I was gonna say hi
or maybe some other such greeting.
279
00:14:01,257 --> 00:14:07,096
First, could you tell me how was
Homer's performance at his last job?
280
00:14:09,807 --> 00:14:11,141
{\an8}Have some whiskey.
281
00:14:11,141 --> 00:14:14,603
Well,
he was consistent.
282
00:14:14,603 --> 00:14:17,231
Lady, I'm not here to bad-mouth
Homer Simpson.
283
00:14:21,318 --> 00:14:22,736
Okay. To be fair,
284
00:14:22,736 --> 00:14:25,281
if they didn't want him to sleep at work,
285
00:14:25,281 --> 00:14:28,617
then they shouldn't have given reactors
that soothing hum.
286
00:14:28,617 --> 00:14:31,370
Well, if you were to give him
a letter grade from A to--
287
00:14:31,370 --> 00:14:33,706
F! No, Z.
288
00:14:33,706 --> 00:14:35,541
You know, we're gonna need
a bigger alphabet.
289
00:14:38,752 --> 00:14:41,714
Oh, did we mention the dome
Homer put over the town?
290
00:14:41,714 --> 00:14:43,549
Oh, that was a Tuesday.
291
00:14:50,472 --> 00:14:55,185
Oh, Homer, do you happen to remember
the atomic mass of uranium?
292
00:14:55,185 --> 00:14:59,481
Oh, that's frightfully easy.
That's 238.02891 u.
293
00:14:59,481 --> 00:15:00,566
I don't know who you are,
294
00:15:00,566 --> 00:15:02,902
but your cheating enabled
this doughnut-eating day-drunk
295
00:15:02,902 --> 00:15:04,737
to steal a job he can't do.
296
00:15:04,737 --> 00:15:06,363
Shame. Shame!
297
00:15:06,363 --> 00:15:08,741
Oh, dear God. I-- I've crossed a line.
298
00:15:08,741 --> 00:15:11,035
I've become a mad scientist.
299
00:15:11,035 --> 00:15:15,205
I, uh-- I think you crossed that line
a while ago.
300
00:15:18,959 --> 00:15:20,044
Hey, Flanders.
301
00:15:20,044 --> 00:15:22,129
You said hello to me.
302
00:15:22,129 --> 00:15:24,214
Why the upside-down frown?
303
00:15:24,214 --> 00:15:28,552
It's funny the people
you say hi to when your life is perfect.
304
00:15:29,136 --> 00:15:32,014
Look, Homer. I'm through.
From now on, just think for yourself.
305
00:15:32,014 --> 00:15:34,099
Okay. My first thought is, never!
306
00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:38,187
You made me the me
I was meant to be, which is you.
307
00:15:38,187 --> 00:15:41,190
Now, get back in my brain
where you belong.
308
00:15:41,190 --> 00:15:43,108
You cannot tell me what to do.
309
00:15:43,108 --> 00:15:44,526
Yes, I can.
310
00:15:44,526 --> 00:15:47,488
As long as you tell me how to say it.
311
00:15:47,488 --> 00:15:49,823
Come on. Tell me how to say it.
312
00:15:49,823 --> 00:15:51,909
I hear raised voices.
313
00:15:51,909 --> 00:15:54,370
How about we raise
a glass of lemonade instead?
314
00:15:54,370 --> 00:15:55,829
Oh, shut up, Flanders.
315
00:15:55,829 --> 00:15:57,331
Ooh, that's good. I like that.
316
00:15:57,331 --> 00:15:58,582
Shut up, Flanders!
317
00:16:01,377 --> 00:16:03,462
Hi. You wanted to talk to me?
318
00:16:03,462 --> 00:16:06,382
Yes. I'm afraid it's, uh, quite serious.
319
00:16:06,382 --> 00:16:09,551
It's about something
I noticed watching you work.
320
00:16:09,551 --> 00:16:13,055
I've noticed you're doing quite well.
321
00:16:13,055 --> 00:16:15,808
I wanted to invite you
on our corporate retreat.
322
00:16:15,808 --> 00:16:17,726
Skiing and science.
323
00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:23,399
Can I just do it over Zoom?
324
00:16:23,399 --> 00:16:27,319
Oh, you will be zooming
down a 12,000-foot slope.
325
00:16:33,659 --> 00:16:38,038
♪ Fun is just a word I've heard ♪
326
00:16:38,539 --> 00:16:41,917
♪ When I'm feeling sad ♪
327
00:16:43,252 --> 00:16:47,506
♪ Stories eight hard years
Have taught me ♪
328
00:16:47,506 --> 00:16:51,427
♪ I cannot share with Dad ♪
329
00:16:51,927 --> 00:16:54,680
Oh, boy,
I wouldn't wanna be that dad.
330
00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:58,600
Oh, for a lament, it's a real earworm.
331
00:16:58,600 --> 00:17:01,061
Earworm? What are you talking about?
There's nothing in my ear.
332
00:17:01,061 --> 00:17:04,356
Professor, is the ski resort a left
or a right at the exit?
333
00:17:04,356 --> 00:17:05,441
Professor?
334
00:17:06,108 --> 00:17:07,693
You can't abandon me now.
335
00:17:07,693 --> 00:17:09,278
I very well can.
336
00:17:09,278 --> 00:17:14,408
And I know that you'll have to make
après-ski chatter. Not avant-après.
337
00:17:14,408 --> 00:17:15,492
Frink out.
338
00:17:23,375 --> 00:17:25,169
Homer, I hate to talk shop,
339
00:17:25,169 --> 00:17:28,672
but we need to run
an efficiency analysis on the turbine.
340
00:17:30,340 --> 00:17:32,885
Come on. Come on. Say something.
341
00:17:33,469 --> 00:17:34,928
Pretty boy, pretty boy.
342
00:17:34,928 --> 00:17:38,891
Uh, pretty boy, pretty boy.
343
00:17:38,891 --> 00:17:41,310
Well,
I appreciate the compliment,
344
00:17:41,310 --> 00:17:43,479
but I need to talk about the turbine.
345
00:17:43,479 --> 00:17:45,355
I want a cracker.
346
00:17:45,355 --> 00:17:47,357
I want a cracker.
347
00:17:47,357 --> 00:17:48,484
Here you go.
348
00:17:49,234 --> 00:17:52,071
Now, can we please talk turbines?
349
00:17:52,071 --> 00:17:54,615
Come on. I need your help. Please.
350
00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:57,242
Another job
I'm overqualified for.
351
00:17:57,242 --> 00:17:59,411
How did you get in my ear?
352
00:17:59,411 --> 00:18:01,914
I've hacked into your frequency.
I know your secret.
353
00:18:01,914 --> 00:18:04,708
And now I'm going to be
the one living in your brain.
354
00:18:04,708 --> 00:18:06,502
Lori? Lori?
355
00:18:06,502 --> 00:18:08,420
{\an8}I just found your diary.
356
00:18:08,420 --> 00:18:11,673
{\an8}- You were such a sad little girl.
- Not now, Mom.
357
00:18:11,673 --> 00:18:14,176
Frink, how do I stop her?
Still me.
358
00:18:14,176 --> 00:18:16,178
Can you put the parrot back on?
359
00:18:16,178 --> 00:18:18,388
I'm a budgie, idiot.
360
00:18:26,522 --> 00:18:28,398
You're not getting rid of me that easily.
361
00:18:28,398 --> 00:18:29,566
What? Why not?
362
00:18:29,566 --> 00:18:31,652
Hello, Marge. I'm Dr. Spivak.
363
00:18:31,652 --> 00:18:34,822
The qualified person
your husband took the job from.
364
00:18:34,822 --> 00:18:37,241
You'll have to be more specific.
365
00:18:40,285 --> 00:18:43,455
Ever ask yourself, Marge,
why does he need an earpiece?
366
00:18:43,455 --> 00:18:44,748
He's not a secret agent.
367
00:18:44,748 --> 00:18:48,252
He's not a backup dancer for Rihanna,
not with that ass.
368
00:18:48,252 --> 00:18:50,754
- Well, you see, I--
- I'm talking to Marge!
369
00:18:50,754 --> 00:18:54,550
As a woman, do you really want
a more qualified woman, me,
370
00:18:54,550 --> 00:18:57,177
to be cheated out of the job she deserves?
371
00:18:57,177 --> 00:19:02,349
As a woman, don't you want me to be able
to take a bath in the middle of the day?
372
00:19:02,349 --> 00:19:03,600
Marge, really?
373
00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:04,852
My career is ruined.
374
00:19:04,852 --> 00:19:06,270
Let that soak in.
375
00:19:06,937 --> 00:19:09,273
Well, uh-- I, uh-- Hmm.
376
00:19:09,273 --> 00:19:13,235
- ♪ In a room a young girl sits ♪
- We women have to stick together because
377
00:19:13,235 --> 00:19:16,947
- if we don't, no one will stick up for us!
- ♪ And sings her sad lament ♪
378
00:19:16,947 --> 00:19:19,283
All right! All right!
379
00:19:21,618 --> 00:19:23,662
Homer, tell the truth.
380
00:19:25,247 --> 00:19:27,457
I am a fraud.
381
00:19:28,584 --> 00:19:30,294
I am also a fraud.
382
00:19:30,294 --> 00:19:32,629
I'm not Finnish. I'm Danish.
383
00:19:32,629 --> 00:19:35,174
Get out of here, you southern scum.
384
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:37,259
- I'm a fraud!
- I'm a fraud!
385
00:19:37,259 --> 00:19:38,760
I'm also a fraud.
386
00:19:38,760 --> 00:19:41,388
My Tinder pic is from nine years ago.
387
00:19:41,388 --> 00:19:43,348
You're the worst of all.
388
00:19:43,348 --> 00:19:47,269
- I can't work for you another day.
- Homer, no.
389
00:19:47,269 --> 00:19:49,771
Don't try to talk me out of it
with your icy charm.
390
00:19:49,771 --> 00:19:52,524
I was saying no because you're skiing
over a cliff.
391
00:19:52,524 --> 00:19:55,194
Stop. Go back. I'm begging you.
392
00:19:58,030 --> 00:20:00,782
Uh, do I still have health insurance?
393
00:20:00,782 --> 00:20:03,202
Canceled one minute ago.
394
00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:05,120
Nobody call an ambulance!
395
00:20:05,120 --> 00:20:08,081
D'oh!
396
00:20:08,081 --> 00:20:12,127
Not again! D'oh! D'oh! D'oh!
397
00:20:13,545 --> 00:20:17,174
Ow!
How tall is this hill anyway?
398
00:20:17,174 --> 00:20:21,553
It didn't look
so high going up. Ow!
399
00:20:24,890 --> 00:20:30,979
Are you coming back to work here
"hat in hand, defiant, begging for mercy"?
400
00:20:30,979 --> 00:20:35,525
Um, is there a box for "preposterous
scheme that blew up in my face"?
401
00:20:35,525 --> 00:20:36,652
Of course there is.
402
00:20:36,652 --> 00:20:39,154
Did you learn a lesson or not?
403
00:20:39,154 --> 00:20:41,490
I did, but I'll soon forget it.
404
00:20:43,492 --> 00:20:44,743
{\an8}Welcome back, Simpson.
405
00:20:45,327 --> 00:20:46,787
Don't bug me. I'm on a break.
406
00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:31,081
Shh!