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Season 20 Episode 08
- The Burns and the Bees -
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Sir, we're two minutes from landing
at the Billionaires' Retreat.
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00:01:10,781 --> 00:01:13,371
Ah, my favorite week
of the year.
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Sophisticated financial discussions
with my fellow plutocrats.
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Food fight!
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Take that, Ted Turner.
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In your face,
founder of Facebook.
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Skinny-dip!
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Yay!
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Yee-haw!
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Gangway!
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"Men."
The room for me.
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Nice prank, Simpson.
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I dare you to dump that bees' nest
on those second grade babies.
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Why would I want to?
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Because I said, "I dare you."
Kearney, can you read it back?
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"Nice prank, Simpson.
"I dare you to...
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"dump that bees' nest
on those second grade babies.
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"Bart: Why would I want to?
"Jimbo: Because I said,
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'I dare you.'
"Kearney, can you read it back?
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"Kearney, reading:
"'Nice prank, Simpson,
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- I dare you to...'"
- The point is, Simpson,
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a dare has been placed
on your nards.
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My nards accept.
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Stingamajigs!
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Save yourselves!
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Huh?
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- Where are the bees?
- No bees?
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- Dare annulled.
- Can I appeal?
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Yeah, appeal to other guys,
Captain Wuss!
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Other than the birth of my kid,
this is my happiest moment.
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All the bees are dead.
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Aye, lass.
The bees are dyin'.
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And not just here.
All over the world,
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from Glasgow
clear to Edinburgh.
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And no one knows why.
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I've lost a lot
of wee friends of late.
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Willie, I didn't know
you were an apiarist.
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From context, I can tell
that means beekeeper.
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'Tis a tragedy, Lisa.
No man should outlive his bees.
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They're stinging God now.
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And the call from the SEC
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was coming from inside
their own brokerage house.
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Jeff Bezos wet his pants!
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I did not. That was apple
juice from before.
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- I fold.
- I raise a million dollars...
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and to sweeten the pot,
my assistant, Smithers.
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If you lose me, sir,
may I say what an honor
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- it's been to...
- Bets don't talk.
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They see and raise.
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Well, if we're betting people,
I got a whole herd of them.
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My professional basketball team:
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the Austin Celtics.
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Well, they're hardly worth a Smithers,
but we don't have all night.
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Can you beat nine high?
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Damn. Eight high.
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So, I own a basketball team,
do I?
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Take good care
of them, Burnsie.
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Don't let the forwards mix
with the guards.
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And if they're acting sluggish,
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slip some steroids
into their cocaine.
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Mm-hmm.
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Fortune Four
lotto numbers are: nine...
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- Pfft... knew it.
- seven...
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- Duh.
- three...
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- What?!
- and...
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Boring.
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Dad, we have to do something.
All the bees are dying.
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Oh, no, no bees?
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Ooh, now who will sting me
and walk all over my sandwiches?
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But Dad,
bees pollinate flowers.
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Flowers: the painted whores
of the plant world.
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No bees means no honey.
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Synthetic honey.
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Just like you remember.
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Honey?
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Thank you.
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D'oh!
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I never dreamed the future
could be scary.
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Let's go, Lisa.
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We've got some worms to save.
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- Bees.
- Worms, bees, ticks, fleas.
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Let's go, go, go!
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I'm glad you called me.
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I know I'm not the first
scientist in the phone book.
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That's Associate
Professor Aaron Ableman.
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How I hate him.
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Thundering thorax,
it's just exactly what I feared!
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In there, close.
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See these red dots?
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This bee has been felled
by bee measles...
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or, as I call it, "beasles".
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Animals can get sick?
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I'm going to talk
to the girl from now on.
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You're the nerd.
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What we need to do now is find
enough uninfected bees
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to start a healthy colony.
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This pheromone
should attract them.
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Marry me,
and I'll support you for life.
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You're not a bee!
This thing is useless.
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There's one on Lisa.
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Hold still, sweetie.
Daddy will kill it.
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And this time, no screwups.
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Stop, stop,
it's an uninfected queen!
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How do we catch her
without hurting her?
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Uh, unfortunately, the best method is
to allow her to sting you.
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Yeah, much like that.
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Now squeeze around the stinger
to keep her attached,
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and a colony of bees
will soon form around your face.
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Now just keep them there until
the colony is healthy and thriving.
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How long is that?
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Long enough that you will be known
as Springfield's crazy bee girl.
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She likes the stingers.
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Marge, remember when we were talking
about our worst fears?
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- Uh-huh.
- Mine was snakes, and yours was...
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Never being a grandmother.
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Really? I thought it was Lisa
with a beard of bees.
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Well, whatever...
brace yourself.
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President Lincoln!
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You've come back,
and you got rid of that hat.
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You've got my vote.
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Lisa, I don't like this at all.
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It's not for long. But until they find
a suitable habitat,
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this beard is the only hope
for these bees.
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Relax, Mom. I'll mold them into a
shape you know and love.
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Stop Milhousing your sister.
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Now take it off
before they sting you.
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Actually, bees rarely sting
when they're in a cluster.
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They only attack
to defend their hive.
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I don't know.
All it takes is one troubled loner.
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Please let me keep them
for just a little longer.
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Okay.
One night.
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So, let's see how my burly-bottomed
ball handlers are faring.
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Smithers, we're leading
two to nothing.
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Run out the clock, boys.
Run out the clock.
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Oh, yeah, three points!
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Big three in the Big D
for the Big C.
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Mark Cuban...
that's me.
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Who is that man,
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and why isn't his enthusiasm
being punished?
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That's Mark Cuban, sir.
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He's the most flamboyant
owner in the league.
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I'm out of my mind!
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How odd.
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His money seems to have
bought him happiness.
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I'd like to meet him,
Smithers.
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So, you made your money
in nuclear power?
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I can't remember how
I made my money.
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If you're really a billionaire,
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give me the secret
billionaires' handshake.
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- Smithers, turn away.
- Yay!
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So, tell me, why don't you recoil from
the public like a normal billionaire?
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Hey, why own a basketball team
if you're not gonna have any fun?
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Fun?
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Is that how it's pronounced?
I've only seen it written.
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Hold that thought. No one's paid
attention to me for ten whole seconds.
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It's time for this peacock
to show his feathers.
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You know, the feathers
with the big eye
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that trick them into
thinking that's my front?
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Said feathers are what I'll flaunt.
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Uh, Mom, maybe you shouldn't have
put so much syrup on the pancakes.
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The secret is not
to swallow the stingers.
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- Dad, don't eat the bees!
- They're just drones, Lisa.
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They only live for,
like, five minutes anyway.
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And they only have haploid cells,
not diploid like me and Bart.
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Yeah!
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Listen, Lisa, I was trying to think
of a way to help your bees,
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and I remembered this abandoned
greenhouse outside of town.
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Which used to be a beautiful,
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thriving greenhouse till
I was hired to run it.
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Your bees will have plenty
of room in this old greenhouse.
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Plus, there are flowers,
and it's near a prison,
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so they'll have a place
to sting people.
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Oh, Mom, it's perfect!
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Go live your lives.
Get off my face!
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Oh, I miss them.
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Now you know how I'll feel
when you go to college.
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You'll always have Bart.
Always.
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But he'll be gone a lot
repairing refrigerators.
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Always.
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Ladies and gentlemen,
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please welcome your new,
fun-loving owner.
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You've seen him on the cover
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of the December 1943 issue
of Collier's Magazine.
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Montgomery Burns!
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Silence!
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Now, let's make some noise for
everyone's favorite basketball team,
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whom I have renamed
the Springfield Excitement.
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I knew it!
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Now I would like
to sing our National Anthem.
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My country 'tis of thee
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Austria, Hungary
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Obey your king...
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Sir, the Archduke is dead.
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What?!
The Archduke is dead?
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And the empire is destroyed.
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- Then what happened?
- World War I.
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00:12:24,595 --> 00:12:26,040
- Then what?
- World War II.
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00:12:26,046 --> 00:12:27,472
- Then what?
- A postwar period.
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00:12:27,477 --> 00:12:28,841
- Then what?
- The Cold War.
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00:12:28,846 --> 00:12:29,961
Then what?
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00:12:30,047 --> 00:12:31,061
Then what?
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00:12:31,535 --> 00:12:33,093
- Then what?
- The European Union.
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00:12:33,108 --> 00:12:35,463
The European Union?!
Good heavens!
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00:12:35,637 --> 00:12:37,873
Ladies, hold onto your husbands!
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00:12:37,876 --> 00:12:42,790
It's time for the saucy antics
of Springfield's own Basket-belles.
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00:12:48,485 --> 00:12:50,193
Enough of this vulgarity.
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00:12:50,197 --> 00:12:52,290
Back to your brothel, harlots!
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00:12:52,615 --> 00:12:54,362
Now, enjoy your game
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00:12:54,368 --> 00:12:56,733
and the madcap antics
of the free-wheeling
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00:12:56,735 --> 00:12:59,310
title-holder of this asset:
me!
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00:13:00,268 --> 00:13:01,942
Hiphop hooray
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00:13:02,278 --> 00:13:04,140
Ho, hey
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00:13:04,597 --> 00:13:06,770
Ho, hey
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00:13:06,966 --> 00:13:09,021
Ho, hey
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Ho
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00:13:10,326 --> 00:13:11,871
You drew a picture
on my money
218
00:13:11,875 --> 00:13:13,392
But you couldn't make my...
219
00:13:14,905 --> 00:13:16,461
Sir, were those real bullets?
220
00:13:16,465 --> 00:13:18,852
- Yes. Was that a real gorilla?
- No.
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00:13:18,878 --> 00:13:19,973
I see.
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00:13:22,765 --> 00:13:25,623
Uh, sir, your escapades,
while well-intentioned,
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00:13:25,635 --> 00:13:27,930
seem to be driving away our fans.
224
00:13:27,937 --> 00:13:29,871
We have to turn
this business around!
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00:13:29,877 --> 00:13:32,580
Time to think
outside the boxeola.
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00:13:32,588 --> 00:13:35,020
What would Mark Cuban do?
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00:13:36,388 --> 00:13:38,491
I'm out of my mind!
228
00:13:40,506 --> 00:13:41,922
That's not much help.
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00:13:42,078 --> 00:13:43,342
Build a new arena.
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State-of-the-art!
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00:13:44,827 --> 00:13:46,822
New arena.
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00:13:59,645 --> 00:14:03,223
That's it, men.
Pave and tar the way God intended.
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00:14:03,225 --> 00:14:05,400
Mr. Burns, you can't do this!
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I can, I shall, and in the future,
I will have done.
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00:14:08,587 --> 00:14:10,610
I cannot be stopped!
236
00:14:12,167 --> 00:14:15,440
Kill his acorns
and make him watch.
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00:14:16,558 --> 00:14:18,201
First, one announcement.
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I regret to inform you
we are not offering childcare tonight.
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00:14:21,708 --> 00:14:24,502
I don't know who that guy was
you were leaving your kids with.
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00:14:24,516 --> 00:14:26,362
Now, without further ado,
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00:14:26,365 --> 00:14:29,650
let's get ready to referendum!
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There's only one place in town
where the bees can survive,
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00:14:33,218 --> 00:14:35,971
and Mr. Burns wants
to tear it down.
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00:14:36,646 --> 00:14:37,740
Please, people.
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00:14:37,748 --> 00:14:39,920
You didn't listen
to me about the snail darter,
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00:14:39,935 --> 00:14:41,883
you didn't listen to me
about the osprey,
247
00:14:41,888 --> 00:14:44,392
and you didn't listen to me
about the javelina.
248
00:14:44,395 --> 00:14:45,930
The feisty pig of the desert?
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00:14:45,935 --> 00:14:47,891
Apparently not feisty enough.
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00:14:47,908 --> 00:14:50,093
Future generations
will judge us
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00:14:50,096 --> 00:14:52,833
by how we cared for
the tiniest creatures.
252
00:14:52,838 --> 00:14:55,631
I am not just asking you
to save the bees.
253
00:14:55,638 --> 00:14:58,850
I am asking you
to save your souls.
254
00:15:01,715 --> 00:15:04,043
Excellent speech.
Just excellent.
255
00:15:04,047 --> 00:15:07,870
I no longer wish to build my magnificent
new basketball stadium.
256
00:15:07,878 --> 00:15:10,121
- You don't?
- Heavens no!
257
00:15:10,428 --> 00:15:11,790
No skyboxes.
258
00:15:11,796 --> 00:15:13,550
No kiss cam.
259
00:15:13,566 --> 00:15:16,820
Nor will we have the chance
to marvel at number one draft pick
260
00:15:16,825 --> 00:15:19,711
Muk Mu, the human North Pole.
261
00:15:21,367 --> 00:15:24,983
No, I'm afraid he'll be on the first
kayak back to Ketchikan.
262
00:15:24,986 --> 00:15:26,851
Noooooooooooooo!
263
00:15:26,858 --> 00:15:30,173
- Please, don't take our freak!
- I love you, Muk Mu!
264
00:15:30,177 --> 00:15:32,540
Muk Mu! Muk Mu!
265
00:15:32,545 --> 00:15:37,223
All those in favor of building this
decadent monument to excess, say aye!
266
00:15:37,235 --> 00:15:38,352
Aye!
267
00:15:39,485 --> 00:15:40,693
Nay.
268
00:15:41,365 --> 00:15:43,530
I know it's not
your fault, Muk Mu.
269
00:15:43,536 --> 00:15:45,583
You're a gentle,
loving soul.
270
00:15:58,477 --> 00:16:00,270
What's wrong with
your bees, Lisa?
271
00:16:00,275 --> 00:16:02,392
Mr. Burns took away
their sanctuary,
272
00:16:02,396 --> 00:16:05,330
and now, they aren't strong enough
to survive on their own.
273
00:16:07,618 --> 00:16:08,911
I'm going home.
274
00:16:08,915 --> 00:16:10,903
Give me the keys
to my bike lock.
275
00:16:10,906 --> 00:16:12,951
- Are you sure?
- Give me the keys!
276
00:16:12,957 --> 00:16:13,993
Okay, okay!
277
00:16:13,998 --> 00:16:16,133
Don't know why
I had 'em in the first place.
278
00:16:20,086 --> 00:16:23,462
Oh, I'd do anything
to cheer up my little girl.
279
00:16:23,476 --> 00:16:24,510
Really?
280
00:16:24,788 --> 00:16:26,563
Listen, Homer,
in the back room,
281
00:16:26,566 --> 00:16:29,030
I got these super-tough
Africanized bees.
282
00:16:29,038 --> 00:16:31,362
I saw this ad
in a gentleman's magazine
283
00:16:31,368 --> 00:16:33,983
for excited African honeys,
and that's what they sent me.
284
00:16:33,987 --> 00:16:36,203
If we could combine them
with Lisa's bees,
285
00:16:36,205 --> 00:16:39,102
it would make them strong enough
to survive any environment.
286
00:16:39,105 --> 00:16:41,440
But how are we supposed
to combine the DNA
287
00:16:41,448 --> 00:16:43,880
of two strains
of the same species?
288
00:16:43,888 --> 00:16:45,313
Actually, Homer...
289
00:16:48,618 --> 00:16:50,591
You and me?
290
00:16:50,596 --> 00:16:52,863
- No, the bees!
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
291
00:16:52,866 --> 00:16:56,112
That's what I meant, too.
I have no...
292
00:16:56,335 --> 00:16:58,063
inclination...
293
00:16:59,155 --> 00:17:00,580
- Got the queen?
- Yup.
294
00:17:00,598 --> 00:17:03,151
And she's ready for a night
of anonymous sex
295
00:17:03,158 --> 00:17:04,871
with multiple partners.
296
00:17:08,708 --> 00:17:11,622
Now, let's give them
some privacy while they...
297
00:17:11,628 --> 00:17:14,581
get down to buzziness.
298
00:17:14,588 --> 00:17:17,592
Come with me
299
00:17:17,597 --> 00:17:20,011
My love
300
00:17:21,355 --> 00:17:22,963
To the sea
301
00:17:23,245 --> 00:17:25,503
The sea of love...
302
00:17:25,517 --> 00:17:27,442
If they was me,
they'd be done by now.
303
00:17:33,166 --> 00:17:35,403
Wow.
This must be important, Dad!
304
00:17:35,405 --> 00:17:38,310
I've never seen you walk up
an incline before.
305
00:17:38,318 --> 00:17:41,461
Sweetie, I have a very
special surprise for you.
306
00:17:41,466 --> 00:17:42,980
My bees?!
307
00:17:44,046 --> 00:17:46,610
Your bees died days ago.
308
00:17:46,616 --> 00:17:49,103
These are their angry,
mutant descendants.
309
00:17:49,115 --> 00:17:52,331
And they're tough enough
to live in any environment.
310
00:17:52,338 --> 00:17:55,143
They sound awfully mad.
Are they dangerous?
311
00:17:55,148 --> 00:17:56,971
Hmm, I'm not sure.
Let me check.
312
00:17:56,975 --> 00:17:58,951
Are you guys dangerous?
Ooh!
313
00:17:59,175 --> 00:18:01,940
A simple yes
would have sufficed.
314
00:18:03,348 --> 00:18:05,950
Don't worry, Lisa.
Where else are they gonna go?
315
00:18:08,077 --> 00:18:11,530
To that new stadium that
looks exactly like a hive.
316
00:18:15,378 --> 00:18:17,850
Welcome to the American dream...
317
00:18:17,856 --> 00:18:20,702
a billionaire using public
funds to construct
318
00:18:20,705 --> 00:18:23,952
a private playground
for the rich and powerful.
319
00:18:25,926 --> 00:18:29,572
And now, so our skybox owners
can really enjoy the game,
320
00:18:29,577 --> 00:18:32,341
I shall let in the sky!
321
00:18:36,127 --> 00:18:38,383
Stop!
I am one of you!
322
00:18:43,375 --> 00:18:46,302
We've been invaded
by a swarm of killer bees!
323
00:18:46,318 --> 00:18:48,311
My microphone is
no microphone at all.
324
00:18:48,318 --> 00:18:51,052
It's bees!
Am I being badly stung?
325
00:18:51,055 --> 00:18:53,023
Yes!
And it hurts!
326
00:19:10,197 --> 00:19:12,061
Our bullets are useless.
327
00:19:12,065 --> 00:19:14,703
Aah!
Okay, they're useful on me.
328
00:19:20,348 --> 00:19:22,632
Oh, they've found a home.
329
00:19:23,566 --> 00:19:25,341
You've won this round,
330
00:19:25,346 --> 00:19:26,832
but when next we meet,
331
00:19:26,846 --> 00:19:30,640
the beekeeper
will be the beekeepee!
332
00:19:35,756 --> 00:19:37,472
Help me, Muk Mu!
333
00:19:42,286 --> 00:19:46,881
So, that's how I was outfoxed by a
little girl and her half-wit companion
334
00:19:46,887 --> 00:19:49,793
when my beautiful stadium
was declared a bee sanctuary,
335
00:19:49,795 --> 00:19:53,180
and I had to take a third-quarter
write down of $804 million.
336
00:19:53,198 --> 00:19:56,243
Wait a minute.
Someone crunch the numbers!
337
00:19:56,575 --> 00:19:58,292
He's only worth...
338
00:19:58,305 --> 00:20:02,741
$996,036,000.
339
00:20:02,748 --> 00:20:04,553
He's not a billionaire at all!
340
00:20:04,555 --> 00:20:05,533
Wait, wait, wait.
341
00:20:05,546 --> 00:20:08,463
It's only a matter of four million.
I'm sure I can find that somewhere.
342
00:20:08,467 --> 00:20:11,350
I, uh... I have $50 here
in my wallet.
343
00:20:12,476 --> 00:20:15,983
Mark, can you get me off
the hook for old times' sake?
344
00:20:15,985 --> 00:20:17,630
Can't do it, Monty.
345
00:20:19,926 --> 00:20:21,383
Aw, don't worry.
346
00:20:21,387 --> 00:20:24,241
You'll feel a lot
more comfortable in the...
347
00:20:24,247 --> 00:20:26,503
millionaires' camp.
348
00:20:26,507 --> 00:20:29,280
No! No!
Just kill me now!
349
00:20:32,337 --> 00:20:33,562
Howdy do?
350
00:20:33,568 --> 00:20:36,661
I own a minor
league hockey team.
351
00:20:38,667 --> 00:20:41,671
Traduction : Skualler & Robot
352
00:20:43,686 --> 00:20:46,823
Synchro : Job22
Relecture : Raph
353
00:20:49,136 --> 00:20:52,200
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