1
00:00:07,056 --> 00:00:09,217
S20E19:
Waverly Hills 9021-D'oh!
2
00:00:26,726 --> 00:00:28,751
Care to try
our new science water?
3
00:00:29,295 --> 00:00:31,663
The label is
all in lowercase.
4
00:00:32,999 --> 00:00:35,834
It's like drinking
E.E. Cummings!
5
00:00:35,902 --> 00:00:39,237
And each of our flavors
is named after a real word!
6
00:00:39,305 --> 00:00:41,920
Nourish.
Vitality.
7
00:00:42,675 --> 00:00:45,189
Purple.
Potato-lime.
8
00:00:45,778 --> 00:00:47,512
I love the '90s.
9
00:00:47,580 --> 00:00:48,988
New car smell.
10
00:00:49,672 --> 00:00:53,554
Excuse me, I'm feeling
a little over-hydrated.
11
00:00:53,589 --> 00:00:54,563
That's normal.
12
00:00:54,599 --> 00:00:57,197
It just means
your bladder's full of science.
13
00:00:57,232 --> 00:01:00,700
Now, if you'll excuse me,
our company just went bankrupt.
14
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Gotta find
a place to tinkle!
15
00:01:11,004 --> 00:01:12,963
Language!
16
00:01:16,237 --> 00:01:17,863
Schools have bathrooms!
17
00:01:17,898 --> 00:01:18,617
And I'm a woman,
18
00:01:18,638 --> 00:01:21,227
so my going in unattended
won't cause a panic.
19
00:01:23,850 --> 00:01:26,518
- Hey, Mrs. Simpson.
- Janey.
20
00:01:28,087 --> 00:01:29,885
Ooh,
that's Bart's class.
21
00:01:32,024 --> 00:01:34,070
Lousy teachers.
22
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Lousy hangover.
23
00:01:37,964 --> 00:01:40,609
This school has
really gone downhill.
24
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That's an
awfully crowded classroom.
25
00:01:51,124 --> 00:01:53,100
Three, two, one.
26
00:01:53,151 --> 00:01:55,666
Okay, children,
I've just been granted tenure.
27
00:01:55,748 --> 00:01:58,329
So I'm gonna sit back and
let Ralph teach for a while.
28
00:02:03,289 --> 00:02:05,991
Class, in what year was
one plus one?
29
00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:09,955
The answer is:
"The amazing Ralph"!
30
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The only person getting an education
here today was me!
31
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In how bad it is!
32
00:02:16,903 --> 00:02:19,028
Mrs. Simpson,
let me pour you a drink.
33
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Scotch? Vodka?
Gin?
34
00:02:21,132 --> 00:02:22,249
I've got
everything you want.
35
00:02:22,283 --> 00:02:24,743
I want my kids
in a decent school!
36
00:02:24,810 --> 00:02:27,079
Hey, I want the "check engine"
light on my dashboard
37
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to shut off,
but that ain't gonna happen.
38
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And because of cutbacks,
they were combining Math with P.E.
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They were playing
dodge book!
40
00:02:37,320 --> 00:02:38,290
Look at this.
41
00:02:38,357 --> 00:02:40,659
Springfield Elementary's rating
is so low,
42
00:02:40,726 --> 00:02:42,632
it's more than
two standard deviations
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00:02:42,667 --> 00:02:43,648
below the norm.
44
00:02:43,696 --> 00:02:45,931
Oh, I can't understand
that math reference,
45
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because I went to
Springfield Elementary!
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00:02:48,167 --> 00:02:50,566
My cousin goes
to a much better school.
47
00:02:50,570 --> 00:02:52,203
He lives in Waverly Hills.
48
00:02:52,271 --> 00:02:54,706
Oh, their school system's
the best.
49
00:02:54,774 --> 00:02:58,012
Their auditorium and their gym
are two different rooms!
50
00:02:59,178 --> 00:03:01,279
We can't afford
to move to Waverly Hills!
51
00:03:01,347 --> 00:03:03,381
Their house prices have
commas in them.
52
00:03:03,449 --> 00:03:05,650
As it is, our lawn is just
green-painted cement.
53
00:03:09,855 --> 00:03:12,023
I just wish I could go
to a school like that--
54
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Even for one week.
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"'tis better to have
learned and lost,
56
00:03:15,394 --> 00:03:17,314
than never to have
learned at all."
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What if we got
a small apartment there?
58
00:03:19,725 --> 00:03:20,832
We wouldn't have
to live in it,
59
00:03:20,900 --> 00:03:23,609
but we would have
a Waverly Hills address.
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00:03:23,636 --> 00:03:25,237
Mom,
that's brilliant!
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00:03:25,304 --> 00:03:28,266
We could go to a school where
special doesn't always mean bad!
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And where the teachers
don't have to moonlight
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00:03:30,343 --> 00:03:31,585
as telemarketers.
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00:03:31,744 --> 00:03:34,936
As you know,
the music of Air Supply is timeless.
65
00:03:34,947 --> 00:03:37,882
And now their 50 biggest hits
are on four CDs.
66
00:03:37,950 --> 00:03:38,619
Wait, wait, wait.
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00:03:38,644 --> 00:03:40,667
You're putting us
in a new school?!
68
00:03:40,702 --> 00:03:42,062
What about my friends?
69
00:03:42,288 --> 00:03:44,456
Oh,
elementary school friends--
70
00:03:44,623 --> 00:03:46,588
Those are forever!
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00:03:46,659 --> 00:03:50,269
You're always gonna be friends
with Milhouse.
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00:03:50,270 --> 00:03:54,397
# Stand by me,
oh, stand by me #
73
00:03:54,398 --> 00:03:56,179
- # Oh, stand now #
- # Oh, stand now #
74
00:03:56,180 --> 00:03:57,718
- # Stand by me #
- # Stand by me #
75
00:03:57,853 --> 00:04:00,202
- # Stand by me #
- # Stand by me #
76
00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:02,474
I need to
rent an apartment
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00:04:02,542 --> 00:04:04,005
in the worst part of
Waverly Hills--
78
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The crappier,
the better.
79
00:04:05,570 --> 00:04:06,705
Ah,
so cheap, eh?
80
00:04:06,740 --> 00:04:09,461
"Ahso sheepay"
to you.
81
00:04:12,418 --> 00:04:13,852
I can't afford
this place--
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00:04:13,919 --> 00:04:15,092
It's way too fancy.
83
00:04:15,188 --> 00:04:17,987
Sometimes,
there's not a train going by.
84
00:04:19,125 --> 00:04:20,759
Four walls?
85
00:04:20,826 --> 00:04:22,627
Hmm,
I was thinking more
86
00:04:22,695 --> 00:04:25,119
of something in a
two or three.
87
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No windows,
no parking,
88
00:04:29,902 --> 00:04:31,223
and a man died here.
89
00:04:31,258 --> 00:04:32,237
Play it cool,
Homer.
90
00:04:32,305 --> 00:04:34,005
Don't let her know
it's perfect.
91
00:04:34,173 --> 00:04:36,076
Yeah, um...
92
00:04:36,175 --> 00:04:39,681
Well, I'm looking at
a lot of murder sites right now.
93
00:04:39,945 --> 00:04:40,712
Where's the bedroom?
94
00:04:40,780 --> 00:04:41,584
Right here.
95
00:04:42,014 --> 00:04:42,904
Hmm?
96
00:04:43,049 --> 00:04:45,070
Tempting.
Tempting.
97
00:04:45,105 --> 00:04:46,151
Where's the bathroom?
98
00:04:46,219 --> 00:04:48,775
In the Ethiopian restaurant
at the end of the block.
99
00:04:48,788 --> 00:04:49,554
I'll take it!
100
00:05:18,918 --> 00:05:20,952
Well,
welcome to Waverly Hills.
101
00:05:21,020 --> 00:05:23,189
Your children can start
school immediately.
102
00:05:23,224 --> 00:05:24,122
Thank you!
103
00:05:24,190 --> 00:05:26,024
Now you'll be getting
a random visit
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00:05:26,092 --> 00:05:28,275
from the inspector,
sometime this month.
105
00:05:28,310 --> 00:05:28,960
The what?
106
00:05:29,028 --> 00:05:30,528
It's just a formality
107
00:05:30,596 --> 00:05:32,722
to make sure
you actually live here.
108
00:05:32,757 --> 00:05:33,965
Some people
use the address
109
00:05:34,033 --> 00:05:36,436
just so their kids
can go to our schools.
110
00:05:36,469 --> 00:05:38,018
Oh,
I can see them now
111
00:05:38,018 --> 00:05:40,638
with their bald heads and
their blue-haired wives.
112
00:05:40,706 --> 00:05:42,595
How I despise them.
113
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Yeah, well,
here's our inspector now.
114
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Call it, friendo.
115
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Heads. I mean, tails.
I mean, on its side.
116
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Well done.
117
00:05:58,090 --> 00:06:00,386
Now, let me
validate your parking.
118
00:06:02,728 --> 00:06:03,878
That's not enough.
119
00:06:04,808 --> 00:06:05,730
Thank you.
120
00:06:10,418 --> 00:06:11,848
Good night, Marge.
121
00:06:12,687 --> 00:06:14,856
It's so kind of you
to live there
122
00:06:14,891 --> 00:06:17,126
so our kids can go
to a better school.
123
00:06:17,161 --> 00:06:19,193
When do I get
to move back home?
124
00:06:19,228 --> 00:06:21,256
You just have to stay there
until that
125
00:06:21,271 --> 00:06:24,831
psychopathic school inspector
makes a surprise visit.
126
00:06:24,899 --> 00:06:26,741
You can come home
when the heat's off.
127
00:06:26,776 --> 00:06:27,783
The heat is off.
128
00:06:27,819 --> 00:06:29,985
The hissing from the radiator
is a snake.
129
00:06:31,172 --> 00:06:34,707
Please just stay there till
Bart graduates high school.
130
00:06:34,742 --> 00:06:38,064
Oh, that's another
20 or 30 years.
131
00:06:46,490 --> 00:06:47,921
Where am I?
132
00:06:50,991 --> 00:06:53,839
Wow, your first day
at the new school!
133
00:06:53,874 --> 00:06:55,264
Lisa, have fun!
134
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Bart, don't!
135
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Look at this place.
136
00:07:01,469 --> 00:07:03,435
It's everything
I've ever dreamed of.
137
00:07:03,470 --> 00:07:05,247
On-campus stables!
138
00:07:09,643 --> 00:07:11,661
Field trips to Europe!
139
00:07:13,239 --> 00:07:14,814
Oh, my God!
140
00:07:14,882 --> 00:07:17,166
Look what they serve
in the cafeteria!
141
00:07:19,175 --> 00:07:20,143
Welcome!
142
00:07:20,178 --> 00:07:22,613
I'm your new principal,
Dr. Bettelheim.
143
00:07:22,648 --> 00:07:24,287
Oh, a doctorate!
144
00:07:24,322 --> 00:07:25,158
Wait!
145
00:07:25,226 --> 00:07:26,688
Don't matriculate
those students!
146
00:07:26,723 --> 00:07:28,118
Principal Skinner?
147
00:07:28,153 --> 00:07:30,231
We need Lisa Simpson at
Springfield Elementary.
148
00:07:30,266 --> 00:07:31,397
She's our top student,
149
00:07:31,467 --> 00:07:34,164
and she writes the fun facts
in the morning announcements!
150
00:07:34,484 --> 00:07:35,959
Skinner!
151
00:07:36,362 --> 00:07:37,600
Bettelheim.
152
00:07:37,635 --> 00:07:38,772
Super-intendent Chalmers?!
153
00:07:38,807 --> 00:07:41,418
What are you doing at...
another school?!
154
00:07:41,453 --> 00:07:43,176
Seymour,
as super-intendent,
155
00:07:43,244 --> 00:07:45,845
I supervise every school
in the district.
156
00:07:45,913 --> 00:07:49,660
So...
You're overseeing other people?
157
00:07:50,050 --> 00:07:53,101
I'm sorry if you
misunderstood our arrangement.
158
00:07:53,136 --> 00:07:54,850
What am I supposed
to tell our children?
159
00:07:54,885 --> 00:07:56,055
They already know,
160
00:07:56,123 --> 00:07:57,883
and they're happy
for me.
161
00:08:04,207 --> 00:08:05,198
Hey, neighbor.
162
00:08:05,233 --> 00:08:06,232
Welcome to the jungle,
163
00:08:06,300 --> 00:08:08,836
also known as
Royal Waverly Apartments.
164
00:08:08,871 --> 00:08:10,557
Brought you
a housewarming present.
165
00:08:12,873 --> 00:08:14,676
Oh, that was great.
166
00:08:14,711 --> 00:08:16,272
You mind if
I use that at work?
167
00:08:16,307 --> 00:08:17,505
It's yours,
my friend.
168
00:08:17,540 --> 00:08:18,822
Hey,
are you into poker?
169
00:08:18,857 --> 00:08:21,281
Well, I love to play,
but I'm not very good.
170
00:08:21,348 --> 00:08:24,511
Also, I always forget to cash my chips
back in for money.
171
00:08:25,110 --> 00:08:28,224
This man-crush
just got bro-mantic!
172
00:08:28,259 --> 00:08:30,006
You make words
into dudes.
173
00:08:30,041 --> 00:08:30,890
Guy-five!
174
00:08:30,958 --> 00:08:31,691
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
175
00:08:36,433 --> 00:08:37,063
Hi, newbie!
176
00:08:37,131 --> 00:08:39,566
I'm Caitlin with a C,
this is Katelyn with a K,
177
00:08:39,633 --> 00:08:41,612
and this is Kate Lynn,
two words.
178
00:08:41,647 --> 00:08:42,524
I'm Lisa.
179
00:08:42,897 --> 00:08:43,922
One word.
180
00:08:43,957 --> 00:08:47,035
So, Lisa, what's your favorite
Alaska Nebraska song?
181
00:08:47,070 --> 00:08:48,639
Mine's
"Touch a Star".
182
00:08:48,676 --> 00:08:51,093
Mine's
"Make It Yours: The Star Song".
183
00:08:51,128 --> 00:08:53,193
Uh,
who's Alaska Nebraska?
184
00:08:53,228 --> 00:08:55,347
"Who's Alaska Nebraska?"
185
00:08:55,382 --> 00:08:57,467
Only the greatest
16-year-old
186
00:08:57,502 --> 00:08:59,385
singer-slash-actress
in the world!
187
00:08:59,453 --> 00:09:01,497
Do you even know
how lame you are?
188
00:09:01,532 --> 00:09:04,090
I should warn you:
By using the term "lame,"
189
00:09:04,158 --> 00:09:06,926
you're violating the
Americans With Disabilities Act.
190
00:09:06,994 --> 00:09:09,437
Ew!
That makes you even lamer!
191
00:09:16,356 --> 00:09:17,990
B-plus?!
192
00:09:18,025 --> 00:09:19,135
Nice work.
193
00:09:19,170 --> 00:09:20,506
But I always get A's.
194
00:09:20,574 --> 00:09:22,508
At my old school,
I got so many A's,
195
00:09:22,576 --> 00:09:24,949
the teachers didn't even
check my work.
196
00:09:24,984 --> 00:09:26,879
Maybe that's why
you got so many A's.
197
00:09:27,678 --> 00:09:30,194
Oh, my God,
you've been challenged!
198
00:09:30,229 --> 00:09:32,752
Well, Lisa,
let's see how you respond.
199
00:09:39,960 --> 00:09:42,562
Bart, at this school,
I'm not a brain,
200
00:09:42,630 --> 00:09:44,931
I'm not popular,
I'm not anything!
201
00:09:44,999 --> 00:09:46,399
Not to worry,
at this school,
202
00:09:46,467 --> 00:09:47,721
we've got a clean slate.
203
00:09:47,756 --> 00:09:50,419
In fact,
I'm establishing my cred right now.
204
00:09:51,672 --> 00:09:52,456
Gotcha!
205
00:09:53,542 --> 00:09:54,913
- Hey!
- Come on.
206
00:09:54,948 --> 00:09:56,405
Take this
as a warning, kids.
207
00:09:56,440 --> 00:09:58,811
Bart Simpson
is the ultimate bad boy.
208
00:09:58,879 --> 00:10:01,414
Befriend him and
you'll wind up just like him--
209
00:10:01,482 --> 00:10:04,766
A rebel who does what he wants,
when he wants.
210
00:10:04,801 --> 00:10:05,470
Wow.
211
00:10:05,505 --> 00:10:07,920
Come on, tough guy,
let's go.
212
00:10:09,456 --> 00:10:11,429
- He's so bad!
- He's so bad!
213
00:10:17,905 --> 00:10:19,966
Okay, I held up
my side of the bargain.
214
00:10:20,033 --> 00:10:22,569
Now you have to go to
Ralphie's birthday party.
215
00:10:22,604 --> 00:10:23,870
Eh,
a deal's a deal.
216
00:10:23,937 --> 00:10:26,297
And you'll stay
till we cut the cake.
217
00:10:26,332 --> 00:10:26,976
Fine.
218
00:10:27,022 --> 00:10:29,860
I want one gift bag now,
and one when the party's over.
219
00:10:29,895 --> 00:10:30,969
Fine.
You got it.
220
00:10:34,361 --> 00:10:36,272
You wanted a pow-wow,
Chief?
221
00:10:36,307 --> 00:10:38,762
I know you've been dealing drugs
at the high school.
222
00:10:38,797 --> 00:10:42,193
But I'll look the other way
if you come to Ralphie's party.
223
00:10:42,228 --> 00:10:44,591
I ain't gonna pin
no tail on no donkey.
224
00:10:44,626 --> 00:10:46,926
Look, just come to the party.
It's gonna be fun.
225
00:10:46,994 --> 00:10:48,466
Batman's
gonna be there.
226
00:10:48,501 --> 00:10:49,829
Ba-Ba-Ba-Batman?!
227
00:10:49,897 --> 00:10:52,417
I ain't messin'
with no caped crusader!
228
00:10:59,072 --> 00:11:00,990
I wonder
what he did.
229
00:11:00,991 --> 00:11:02,909
I heard he burned down
his old school.
230
00:11:02,977 --> 00:11:04,623
I heard
he killed a groundskeeper!
231
00:11:04,858 --> 00:11:07,045
Oh, my,
that's a bit rough.
232
00:11:11,652 --> 00:11:14,921
Now, to turn my sis
from loser to schmoozer.
233
00:11:17,928 --> 00:11:18,992
Hmm...
234
00:11:20,214 --> 00:11:21,437
¿qué pasa,
ladies?
235
00:11:21,472 --> 00:11:22,730
You're that bad boy.
236
00:11:22,765 --> 00:11:24,731
What do you want from us,
bad boy?
237
00:11:24,798 --> 00:11:28,270
Don't tell anyone,
but my sister Lisa is best friends
238
00:11:28,305 --> 00:11:29,602
with Alaska Nebraska.
239
00:11:29,670 --> 00:11:31,020
- Get out of here!
- No way!
240
00:11:31,105 --> 00:11:32,105
You so lie!
241
00:11:32,173 --> 00:11:34,660
She didn't even know who
Alaska Nebraska was.
242
00:11:34,695 --> 00:11:37,910
Duh! She said that because
she respects Alaska's privacy.
243
00:11:37,978 --> 00:11:39,345
Just as
I have no doubt
244
00:11:39,413 --> 00:11:42,418
you guys will respect
Lisa's privacy.
245
00:11:53,180 --> 00:11:55,379
We're approaching
bandwidth overload, sir.
246
00:11:55,414 --> 00:11:57,432
It's gossip
at Waverly Elementary.
247
00:11:57,467 --> 00:11:58,457
How juicy is it?
248
00:11:58,492 --> 00:11:59,820
The juiciest!
249
00:12:02,366 --> 00:12:03,177
Hi, Lisa!
250
00:12:03,270 --> 00:12:05,304
- Hi, Caitlin.
- She knows my name!
251
00:12:05,372 --> 00:12:07,173
No,
she knows my name!
252
00:12:07,241 --> 00:12:08,895
Bart,
your plan worked!
253
00:12:08,930 --> 00:12:10,284
My plan
was to lie.
254
00:12:10,319 --> 00:12:11,128
Lie like hell.
255
00:12:11,163 --> 00:12:12,212
And that's what I did.
256
00:12:13,147 --> 00:12:14,614
Well, well.
257
00:12:14,681 --> 00:12:15,866
Seems like someone
258
00:12:15,900 --> 00:12:17,874
forgot about
a previous engagement
259
00:12:17,909 --> 00:12:20,918
at the bowling alley
from 2:00 to 4:30.
260
00:12:57,458 --> 00:12:59,671
Get him
and string him up.
261
00:13:02,696 --> 00:13:04,564
"You have the right
to be delighted.
262
00:13:04,631 --> 00:13:07,867
If you do not have a gift,
one will be provided for you."
263
00:13:12,208 --> 00:13:13,070
It's open.
264
00:13:13,588 --> 00:13:15,461
Marge,
I'm glad you came.
265
00:13:15,496 --> 00:13:16,788
There's a kegger
down the hall.
266
00:13:16,788 --> 00:13:18,811
We can go as soon as
I desecrate this corpse.
267
00:13:20,695 --> 00:13:23,119
I'm sorry, Marge.
Where are my manners?
268
00:13:23,164 --> 00:13:26,371
Did you want to taunt my kill, also?
Press the X button.
269
00:13:26,568 --> 00:13:28,000
Ooh, I'm doing it!
270
00:13:34,910 --> 00:13:36,182
I'll get us
some brewskies.
271
00:13:37,545 --> 00:13:38,613
Cup, my lady?
272
00:13:38,635 --> 00:13:41,248
Or would you care to
funnel it down thy throat?
273
00:13:42,617 --> 00:13:45,918
- Definitely a cup.
- Foam wasn't spilt in a day.
274
00:13:46,655 --> 00:13:48,164
Dude,
your date is hot!
275
00:13:48,223 --> 00:13:51,506
- Does she have a sister?
- Two, actually. Twins.
276
00:13:51,593 --> 00:13:53,394
- Twins!
- Twins!
277
00:13:54,028 --> 00:13:58,799
I was an astronaut for a little bit.
So many rules.
278
00:14:03,139 --> 00:14:05,172
Your hair smells nice!
279
00:14:07,743 --> 00:14:11,439
- Listen, I got a place down the hall.
- Oh, let's go.
280
00:14:14,483 --> 00:14:17,025
So, were you two
in the same accident,
281
00:14:17,060 --> 00:14:18,473
or...
or what?
282
00:14:22,424 --> 00:14:26,038
We don't need a bed.
We're not gonna be sleeping.
283
00:14:29,615 --> 00:14:32,659
We're not the only ones
having a good time.
284
00:14:33,034 --> 00:14:35,473
What in God's name
was I thinking?!
285
00:14:36,938 --> 00:14:38,840
Maybe you could
come over again.
286
00:14:38,849 --> 00:14:41,504
I'll cook you my special
microwave burritos.
287
00:14:41,710 --> 00:14:45,983
I stop the oven when the middle
is still a little bit frozen.
288
00:14:46,114 --> 00:14:49,008
You know
what a girl likes, mister.
289
00:14:49,159 --> 00:14:51,048
So, can I see you again?
290
00:14:51,219 --> 00:14:55,294
How about you, me and
my wife have a two-way?
291
00:14:57,525 --> 00:14:58,379
Hi.
292
00:14:59,528 --> 00:15:02,018
Lisa, I regraded your paper
from the other day,
293
00:15:02,053 --> 00:15:03,141
and you got an A.
294
00:15:03,365 --> 00:15:03,958
Really?
295
00:15:04,188 --> 00:15:06,298
My kid's a huge
Alaska Nebraska fan.
296
00:15:06,368 --> 00:15:09,123
If she could somehow get an
autographed photo or T-shirt,
297
00:15:09,204 --> 00:15:11,671
that would be
A-plus in my book.
298
00:15:12,073 --> 00:15:13,540
Did you just
wink at me?
299
00:15:13,942 --> 00:15:16,113
Oh, look, there are
pumpkin stickers on the floor.
300
00:15:16,148 --> 00:15:18,339
They must have fallen off
your homework for next week,
301
00:15:18,380 --> 00:15:19,625
which you don't have
to hand in.
302
00:15:23,051 --> 00:15:25,350
I didn't think
I'd get a fresh start like this
303
00:15:25,391 --> 00:15:26,712
till junior high.
304
00:15:27,122 --> 00:15:29,078
L'école, c'est moi!
(It's me, the school!)
305
00:15:30,025 --> 00:15:31,959
Oui. C'est toi!
(Yes. It's you!)
306
00:15:32,027 --> 00:15:35,216
Even the Ralph of this school
speaks French!
307
00:15:35,251 --> 00:15:36,473
Au revoir!
(Thank you!)
308
00:15:40,168 --> 00:15:41,936
I love tapas!
309
00:15:41,971 --> 00:15:44,722
It's like appetizers for
a meal that never comes.
310
00:15:45,740 --> 00:15:48,161
Try the
flan de leche de cabra.
311
00:15:48,243 --> 00:15:50,861
Be sure to dig around
in the gunk.
312
00:15:53,815 --> 00:15:54,905
Homie!
313
00:15:55,350 --> 00:15:58,151
A key to
your apartment!
314
00:15:59,988 --> 00:16:02,156
And I've got
a present for you,
315
00:16:02,157 --> 00:16:06,000
but you'll have to wait till
we're back at the apartment.
316
00:16:06,127 --> 00:16:07,647
Why can't
I have it now?
317
00:16:07,696 --> 00:16:09,044
You got
your present here.
318
00:16:09,231 --> 00:16:10,731
Basic fairness
dictates...
319
00:16:13,168 --> 00:16:14,473
Caitlin, hi.
320
00:16:14,803 --> 00:16:17,163
Do a reading
at your bar mitzvah?
321
00:16:17,172 --> 00:16:19,047
A sheynam dank!
(Thank you very much!)
322
00:16:19,174 --> 00:16:21,329
Now my bar mitzvah
means something.
323
00:16:21,364 --> 00:16:22,777
By the way,
I was wondering,
324
00:16:22,844 --> 00:16:25,196
there's this Alaska Nebraska
concert this weekend,
325
00:16:25,247 --> 00:16:27,317
and the tickets
are all sold out.
326
00:16:27,352 --> 00:16:30,881
Well, if it's sold out,
even Alaska Nebraska's best friend
327
00:16:30,916 --> 00:16:32,386
couldn't do anything
about that.
328
00:16:33,655 --> 00:16:35,212
Can't build more seats.
329
00:16:35,323 --> 00:16:37,674
Then get us
backstage passes.
330
00:16:39,605 --> 00:16:41,027
Surprise!
331
00:16:41,770 --> 00:16:43,364
I redecorated!
332
00:16:43,431 --> 00:16:44,749
Where are
my video games?
333
00:16:44,766 --> 00:16:46,305
My X-Box?!
My Wii?
334
00:16:46,334 --> 00:16:48,836
You don't need a Wii
now that I'm here.
335
00:16:48,871 --> 00:16:51,566
Because you and me
make us.
336
00:16:51,601 --> 00:16:52,298
You know,
you're starting
337
00:16:52,333 --> 00:16:54,192
to remind me a lot
of my first wife.
338
00:16:54,209 --> 00:16:56,706
We can talk about that
after brunch with my mother.
339
00:16:56,778 --> 00:16:57,771
Oh!
340
00:17:00,980 --> 00:17:02,183
Ms. Nebraska,
341
00:17:02,250 --> 00:17:05,407
your purified water and
fried chicken skins are here.
342
00:17:09,858 --> 00:17:12,974
I am so tired of fans
in my food.
343
00:17:13,361 --> 00:17:15,096
Alaska,
we've never met,
344
00:17:15,163 --> 00:17:17,395
but everyone thinks
I'm your best friend.
345
00:17:17,499 --> 00:17:19,181
Wait.
Wait, let me guess.
346
00:17:19,216 --> 00:17:21,468
I'm supposed to give
all your best friends
347
00:17:21,536 --> 00:17:23,681
front-row seats
and backstage passes.
348
00:17:23,716 --> 00:17:24,492
Could you?
349
00:17:24,527 --> 00:17:25,973
First,
riddle me this.
350
00:17:26,041 --> 00:17:28,476
What's your favorite episode
of my show?
351
00:17:28,511 --> 00:17:29,813
You have a show?
352
00:17:31,847 --> 00:17:35,482
Look, can you please,
please help a poor little girl
353
00:17:35,550 --> 00:17:37,148
who was just trying
to fit in?
354
00:17:37,152 --> 00:17:39,197
It's what half your songs
are about.
355
00:17:39,521 --> 00:17:40,448
You know what?
356
00:17:40,689 --> 00:17:43,125
I was a little girl who
didn't fit in, either.
357
00:17:43,160 --> 00:17:44,458
So you know
what I did?
358
00:17:44,526 --> 00:17:46,642
I got a new nose,
I got famous,
359
00:17:46,677 --> 00:17:48,497
and now I date
the starting point guard
360
00:17:48,532 --> 00:17:49,513
for the
L.A. Clippers.
361
00:17:49,548 --> 00:17:50,932
Now if
you'll excuse me,
362
00:17:50,979 --> 00:17:52,757
I have to go
meditate and smoke.
363
00:17:55,270 --> 00:17:57,154
Wait.
I want to ask you something.
364
00:17:57,189 --> 00:17:59,549
Could you tell I lip-synched
that whole speech?
365
00:17:59,584 --> 00:18:00,372
You know what?
366
00:18:00,427 --> 00:18:03,143
I was a little girl who
didn't fit in, either.
367
00:18:03,211 --> 00:18:04,323
So you know
what I did?
368
00:18:04,363 --> 00:18:06,034
I got a new nose,
I...
369
00:18:06,148 --> 00:18:07,348
That's amazing.
370
00:18:07,398 --> 00:18:08,999
I know.
Security!
371
00:18:09,034 --> 00:18:12,053
You know, I think
those shirts should say insecurity.
372
00:18:12,088 --> 00:18:14,679
Because if you feel you have to put
what you are on your shirt,
373
00:18:14,714 --> 00:18:16,196
then I feel
sorry for you.
374
00:18:16,291 --> 00:18:17,601
Do you feel
sorry for me?
375
00:18:17,701 --> 00:18:19,352
Guess not.
376
00:18:23,162 --> 00:18:24,560
Where have you been?
377
00:18:24,595 --> 00:18:26,211
We have mirrors to hang!
378
00:18:26,246 --> 00:18:27,243
I went to a movie.
379
00:18:27,333 --> 00:18:28,360
Without me?
380
00:18:28,368 --> 00:18:29,368
How'd you get there?
381
00:18:29,402 --> 00:18:31,075
- I drove.
- Without me?
382
00:18:31,831 --> 00:18:34,006
Sometimes I think this
50-square-foot apartment
383
00:18:34,074 --> 00:18:35,612
isn't big enough
for the both of us!
384
00:18:35,742 --> 00:18:37,810
Fine!
You can have your key back!
385
00:18:39,312 --> 00:18:41,397
I got it halfway.
386
00:18:41,449 --> 00:18:42,863
D'oh!
It went back.
387
00:18:46,553 --> 00:18:47,876
City Inspector.
388
00:18:49,589 --> 00:18:51,057
I'm here to verify
389
00:18:51,103 --> 00:18:53,916
that this is the residence
of Bart and Lisa Simpson.
390
00:19:09,275 --> 00:19:11,587
Hello, friendos.
391
00:19:15,281 --> 00:19:17,878
Here comes Lisa
with our backstage passes!
392
00:19:19,252 --> 00:19:21,376
People,
I'm not who you think I am.
393
00:19:21,488 --> 00:19:24,488
I'm just a transfer student
who wanted to make some friends.
394
00:19:24,590 --> 00:19:25,891
Yes,
I lied to you,
395
00:19:25,959 --> 00:19:28,110
but you only liked me
because of a lie.
396
00:19:28,227 --> 00:19:29,396
So if you
think about it--
397
00:19:29,431 --> 00:19:30,613
Get the liar!
398
00:19:40,506 --> 00:19:42,292
Those are
last year's shoes!
399
00:19:42,327 --> 00:19:43,132
Kill her!
400
00:19:43,142 --> 00:19:44,377
Also, it's Lisa!
401
00:19:44,412 --> 00:19:45,617
Kill her twice!
402
00:19:46,691 --> 00:19:47,936
Go, Dog, Go!
403
00:19:48,114 --> 00:19:49,813
With pages missing.
404
00:19:50,483 --> 00:19:53,310
Lego spaceship,
poorly assembled.
405
00:19:53,587 --> 00:19:56,685
Clearly, this is the home of
elementary school children.
406
00:19:56,823 --> 00:19:57,665
Too bad.
407
00:19:57,758 --> 00:19:59,785
I was looking forward
to killing you
408
00:19:59,821 --> 00:20:01,719
and making it look
like a suicide.
409
00:20:01,895 --> 00:20:03,964
Thank you, friendo.
410
00:20:03,897 --> 00:20:05,336
I am
not your friendo.
411
00:20:05,631 --> 00:20:06,460
But I thought...
412
00:20:06,833 --> 00:20:07,898
You said...
413
00:20:09,184 --> 00:20:10,454
Mom! Dad!
414
00:20:10,470 --> 00:20:13,240
I have to leave Waverly Hills
and never come back.
415
00:20:13,275 --> 00:20:14,285
I got to get back,
too.
416
00:20:14,374 --> 00:20:16,662
I just remembered I was playing
hide-and-seek with Milhouse.
417
00:20:16,676 --> 00:20:18,021
Three weeks?!
418
00:20:18,075 --> 00:20:20,487
This has got to be
some kind of record.
419
00:20:20,547 --> 00:20:22,539
I can't leave
my bachelor pad.
420
00:20:22,582 --> 00:20:24,268
My bros will miss me.
421
00:20:24,303 --> 00:20:24,956
No, we won't!
422
00:20:25,001 --> 00:20:27,320
Your comments when
we watch movies aren't funny.
423
00:20:27,387 --> 00:20:28,563
Why do you watch comedies
424
00:20:28,599 --> 00:20:30,289
if you don't want to hear
more jokes?
425
00:20:30,723 --> 00:20:31,392
Please...
426
00:20:31,421 --> 00:20:33,351
I just want to go back
to a place
427
00:20:33,386 --> 00:20:35,817
where I'm ostracized
for being me.
428
00:20:35,829 --> 00:20:37,825
Not for
who I pretend to be.
429
00:20:37,864 --> 00:20:38,916
What do you think,
Marge?
430
00:20:38,932 --> 00:20:41,120
Maybe we've outgrown
our first apartment.
431
00:20:41,167 --> 00:20:45,248
Yeah. A house in the suburbs
does sound pretty nice right now.
432
00:20:45,805 --> 00:20:48,998
Although, I am gonna miss
our little love nest.
433
00:20:57,416 --> 00:20:58,781
Get a room!
434
00:20:58,918 --> 00:21:00,619
- Come on, boy. Be cool!
- But...
435
00:21:00,666 --> 00:21:02,312
Be cool,
or you're grounded!
436
00:21:03,569 --> 00:21:08,087
Transcript: Bierdopje.eu
Sync: Muter
437
00:21:09,056 --> 00:21:14,257
Final Edits by: VeRdiKT
[Subscene.com]