1
00:00:38,019 --> 00:00:41,388
This romance is
so full of heartfelt passion.
2
00:00:41,564 --> 00:00:45,350
I can really identify with
this corn-fed heroine.
3
00:00:45,569 --> 00:00:47,313
Homer, are you awake?
4
00:00:47,487 --> 00:00:49,861
This is important.
Give me some sign you're awake.
5
00:00:50,908 --> 00:00:53,316
-Wake up!
-What's wrong?
6
00:00:53,494 --> 00:00:55,653
House run away? Dog's on fire?
7
00:00:55,830 --> 00:00:59,413
Homie, do you think that the romance
has gone out of our lives?
8
00:01:00,334 --> 00:01:02,459
Wake up!
9
00:01:02,629 --> 00:01:05,250
Marge, it's 3 a.m.,
and I worked all day.
10
00:01:05,465 --> 00:01:07,956
It's 9:30 p.m., and you spent
your whole Saturday...
11
00:01:08,134 --> 00:01:10,376
...drinking beer
in Maggie's kiddie pool.
12
00:01:11,471 --> 00:01:13,595
There you are.
13
00:01:13,765 --> 00:01:15,224
Thought you could get away, huh?
14
00:01:15,434 --> 00:01:17,759
Homer, young people learn
about love from adults.
15
00:01:17,937 --> 00:01:22,184
We've been setting a terrible example
for our children and the community.
16
00:01:22,358 --> 00:01:26,309
I want us to deal with the issues
raised by this book.
17
00:01:29,366 --> 00:01:31,774
We shouldn't have put
a fireplace in the bedroom.
18
00:02:05,196 --> 00:02:08,316
How many times can you laugh
at that cat getting hit by the moon?
19
00:02:08,532 --> 00:02:09,861
It's a new episode.
20
00:02:10,034 --> 00:02:12,787
Not exactly. They pieced it
together from old shows.
21
00:02:12,954 --> 00:02:16,371
And it seems new to the trusting eyes
of impressionable youth.
22
00:02:16,583 --> 00:02:19,418
-Really?
-Ren & Stimpy do it all the time.
23
00:02:19,628 --> 00:02:23,164
Yes, and when was the last you heard
anyone talk about Hen & Stimpy?
24
00:02:23,340 --> 00:02:26,757
Children, your father and I
have fed you and clothed you...
25
00:02:26,927 --> 00:02:29,716
...but we've neglected
something more important.
26
00:02:29,930 --> 00:02:32,055
It's time to learn about love.
27
00:02:32,266 --> 00:02:34,141
No need. We already learned in school.
28
00:02:34,519 --> 00:02:36,310
This is Fuzzy Bunny.
29
00:02:36,521 --> 00:02:41,397
About a year ago he noticed his voice
was changing. He had terrible acne...
30
00:02:41,568 --> 00:02:47,524
...and had in! where there was no in!
before. He also noticed Fluffy Bunny.
31
00:02:47,741 --> 00:02:49,533
Boring.
32
00:02:49,743 --> 00:02:53,789
Fuzzy went to the park,
the ice-cream social, the boat show...
33
00:02:53,956 --> 00:02:58,287
...and other wholesome activities.
They never ruined their fun...
34
00:02:58,461 --> 00:03:01,830
...by giving in to their throbbing
biological urges.
35
00:03:02,006 --> 00:03:03,964
Then came the big day.
36
00:03:04,134 --> 00:03:09,045
Fluffy and Fuzzy got married.
That night came the honeymoon.
37
00:03:10,933 --> 00:03:12,309
She's faking it.
38
00:03:12,518 --> 00:03:15,769
I mean romance, not love.
39
00:03:15,980 --> 00:03:17,226
Mom, romance is dead.
40
00:03:17,440 --> 00:03:20,442
It was acquired in a hostile takeover
by Hallmark and Disney...
41
00:03:20,651 --> 00:03:23,356
...homogenized and sold off
piece by piece.
42
00:03:23,571 --> 00:03:27,949
That's not true! Romance is
all around us, in our neighborhoods.
43
00:03:29,244 --> 00:03:31,404
Even at our jobs.
44
00:03:41,132 --> 00:03:45,509
All you have to do is think about
your most cherished memories.
45
00:03:46,763 --> 00:03:49,005
-Moe's Tavern.
-Hello, is Al there?
46
00:03:49,182 --> 00:03:51,935
-Al?
-Yeah, Al. Last name, Coholic.
47
00:03:52,144 --> 00:03:53,520
Let me check.
48
00:03:53,729 --> 00:03:56,350
Phone call for Al.
Al Coholic.
49
00:03:56,565 --> 00:03:58,641
Jock Strap.
50
00:03:58,859 --> 00:04:00,651
Is I.P. Freely here?
51
00:04:00,861 --> 00:04:04,444
Hey, is there a Butts here?
Seymour Butts?
52
00:04:05,241 --> 00:04:07,732
Homer Sexual!
Mike Rotch!
53
00:04:07,952 --> 00:04:09,578
Amanda Huggenkiss!
54
00:04:09,788 --> 00:04:12,029
Hugh Jass.
Ivana Tinkle.
55
00:04:12,248 --> 00:04:15,535
I'm a stupid moron with an ugly face
and a big butt...
56
00:04:15,752 --> 00:04:19,538
...and my butt smells
and I like to kiss my own butt.
57
00:04:19,757 --> 00:04:21,133
No, no!
58
00:04:21,300 --> 00:04:25,512
No, ask your heart
what its fondest desire is.
59
00:04:28,182 --> 00:04:30,389
Chocolate.
60
00:04:31,269 --> 00:04:33,393
Invisible cola.
61
00:04:34,189 --> 00:04:36,479
Forbidden donut.
62
00:04:37,734 --> 00:04:39,645
"Sacrilicious."
63
00:04:41,154 --> 00:04:42,317
Snouts.
64
00:04:42,990 --> 00:04:44,318
Free goo.
65
00:04:45,492 --> 00:04:46,951
Something.
66
00:04:47,203 --> 00:04:49,195
No, think about people...
67
00:04:49,372 --> 00:04:53,287
...about moments in your life
that have been very romantic.
68
00:04:53,501 --> 00:04:54,533
Oh, okay.
69
00:04:57,797 --> 00:05:01,583
That's not the idea at all.
70
00:05:02,344 --> 00:05:08,051
Okay. Well, this story isn't ideal.
I've never told it to you before.
71
00:05:08,392 --> 00:05:12,806
I got a thoughtless birthday present from
someone who shall remain nameless.
72
00:05:16,442 --> 00:05:18,768
I went to the bowling alley
to spite him. Or her.
73
00:05:31,125 --> 00:05:34,661
-I'm awfully sorry.
-Entirely my fault.
74
00:05:34,879 --> 00:05:36,504
It is nice to meet you...
75
00:05:37,799 --> 00:05:39,294
...Homer.
76
00:05:39,467 --> 00:05:44,462
No, no. Homer is my
ball's name. I'm Marge.
77
00:05:49,019 --> 00:05:54,062
Your fingers are slender, so feminine.
They're too tapered for this ball.
78
00:05:54,233 --> 00:05:57,602
You need something lighter,
more delicate.
79
00:05:57,820 --> 00:06:02,696
-Here, use my ball.
-No, thank you, Mister...Brunswick.
80
00:06:02,909 --> 00:06:05,151
-Call me Jacques.
-Jacques.
81
00:06:05,370 --> 00:06:06,746
Marge.
82
00:06:07,789 --> 00:06:09,949
May I ask you a bold question?
83
00:06:10,125 --> 00:06:11,916
-Sure.
-You've never bowled?
84
00:06:12,085 --> 00:06:13,414
-Never.
-No.
85
00:06:13,629 --> 00:06:15,919
-No.
-Then I will teach you.
86
00:06:16,090 --> 00:06:19,293
-I don't want to trouble you.
-Not at all. I'm a professional.
87
00:06:19,510 --> 00:06:21,716
Roll the ball, Marge.
Let me see your form.
88
00:06:21,887 --> 00:06:24,890
All right.
But I'm not very good.
89
00:06:27,852 --> 00:06:31,352
I can hit the one pin, but
the rest of them don't even wobble.
90
00:06:31,523 --> 00:06:33,682
I can help you, Marge.
Pick up the ball.
91
00:06:33,900 --> 00:06:36,190
Pick up Homer. Pick him up.
92
00:06:38,363 --> 00:06:39,859
-Now throw.
-But--
93
00:06:40,032 --> 00:06:42,108
Throw, damn you.
94
00:06:46,581 --> 00:06:48,989
You're a very good teacher.
95
00:06:50,418 --> 00:06:53,040
-Here we are.
-You didn't have to drop me off.
96
00:06:53,213 --> 00:06:54,625
But I wanted to.
97
00:06:54,798 --> 00:06:58,879
Marge, do you know how beautiful
you look in the moonlight?
98
00:06:59,052 --> 00:07:02,505
-Jacques, I'm a married woman.
-I know, I know.
99
00:07:02,681 --> 00:07:08,056
My mind says stop, but my heart
and my hips cry, "Proceed!"
100
00:07:09,355 --> 00:07:11,562
Darling, I want to see you tomorrow.
101
00:07:11,733 --> 00:07:13,975
-Meet me tomorrow for brunch.
-What's brunch?
102
00:07:14,194 --> 00:07:16,685
You'd love it. It's not quite
breakfast or lunch...
103
00:07:16,863 --> 00:07:19,901
...but it comes with a slice of
cantaloupe at the end.
104
00:07:20,117 --> 00:07:23,818
You don't get what you would at
breakfast, but you get a good meal.
105
00:07:23,996 --> 00:07:26,238
He seemed to know a lot
about brunch.
106
00:07:26,415 --> 00:07:29,453
But it turned all! he wasn't
interested in brunch at all.
107
00:07:30,920 --> 00:07:35,416
Your laughter is like music but if you
laugh at what I say next, I will die.
108
00:07:35,591 --> 00:07:39,377
For I am about to say something
very serious, perhaps shocking.
109
00:07:39,596 --> 00:07:43,048
Marge, my darling, I want
you to meet with me again.
110
00:07:43,225 --> 00:07:46,476
-That doesn't shock me.
-Away from prying eyes.
111
00:07:46,645 --> 00:07:50,098
At my apartment, the Fiesta Terrace.
112
00:07:52,526 --> 00:07:54,768
Marge, speak to me!
113
00:07:55,530 --> 00:07:57,404
Is Thursday okay?
114
00:08:10,879 --> 00:08:13,335
Thank goodness I drove
down that ironic street.
115
00:08:14,675 --> 00:08:19,421
I made the right decision to stay with
my Homie, and there was no harm done.
116
00:08:20,681 --> 00:08:24,383
So if you mentally snip out the part
where I already had a husband...
117
00:08:24,561 --> 00:08:26,934
...that's my idea of romance.
118
00:08:27,147 --> 00:08:30,184
Marge, I want you
to stop seeing this Jacques.
119
00:08:30,359 --> 00:08:31,817
You can let him down gently...
120
00:08:31,985 --> 00:08:35,652
...but over the next couple of months,
I want you to break it off.
121
00:08:35,823 --> 00:08:37,400
Okay, Homer.
122
00:08:37,950 --> 00:08:39,576
That was a close one, kids.
123
00:08:42,205 --> 00:08:46,203
Okay, Marge. As long as
we're traumatizing the kids...
124
00:08:46,376 --> 00:08:49,378
...I have a scandalous story
of my own.
125
00:08:50,463 --> 00:08:53,963
Gentlemen, I'd like you to meet
your new coworker, Mindy Simmons.
126
00:08:54,134 --> 00:08:56,258
She has a degree in engineering
or something.
127
00:08:56,428 --> 00:08:57,591
Hi. How's it going?
128
00:08:57,805 --> 00:08:59,632
-Oh, pleased to meet you.
-Yeah, ditto.
129
00:08:59,848 --> 00:09:01,177
Hi.
130
00:09:05,480 --> 00:09:07,188
Homer, what's the matter?
131
00:09:07,357 --> 00:09:10,394
Ain't you never seen a naked chick
riding a clam before?
132
00:09:11,569 --> 00:09:13,028
Gotta go!
133
00:09:17,826 --> 00:09:21,742
I made it the whole day
without seeing her again.
134
00:09:22,581 --> 00:09:25,334
I mean, "Hello!"
135
00:09:25,626 --> 00:09:27,667
I guess we'll be going down together.
136
00:09:27,837 --> 00:09:30,376
-I mean, getting off togeth-- I mean--
-That's okay.
137
00:09:30,548 --> 00:09:34,297
I'll just push the button for
the stimulator-- I mean, elevator.
138
00:09:34,469 --> 00:09:37,886
Think unsexy thoughts, think unsexy
thoughts, think unsexy thoughts,
139
00:09:46,148 --> 00:09:47,809
Well, this is my floor.
140
00:09:51,487 --> 00:09:52,816
See you tomorrow!
141
00:09:53,031 --> 00:09:56,530
I tried to avoid her, but we were
sent to a nuclear convention together.
142
00:10:02,082 --> 00:10:03,743
TV's there. Bathroom's there.
143
00:10:03,917 --> 00:10:06,207
And there's your king-size bed for:
144
00:10:13,803 --> 00:10:15,084
-Hubba-hubba.
-Stop that.
145
00:10:15,263 --> 00:10:18,846
I love my wife and family. All I'll use
this bed for is sleeping, eating...
146
00:10:19,017 --> 00:10:21,686
...and maybe building a little fort.
That's it!
147
00:10:21,895 --> 00:10:26,771
Homer, I got a really wicked idea
that could get us into a lot of trouble.
148
00:10:26,942 --> 00:10:31,688
-Mindy. We have to fight our temptation.
-No, Homer.
149
00:10:31,864 --> 00:10:33,525
Let's do it.
150
00:10:33,699 --> 00:10:35,609
Let's call room service!
151
00:10:38,412 --> 00:10:40,619
Someone's charging room service
to the company.
152
00:10:40,832 --> 00:10:43,916
Well, we'll just see about that.
153
00:10:44,586 --> 00:10:48,833
Fly, my pretties. Fly!
154
00:10:54,388 --> 00:10:56,096
Continue the research.
155
00:10:58,601 --> 00:11:00,807
Thanks for poisoning the planet,
bastard!
156
00:11:00,978 --> 00:11:03,683
-Get bent!
-No more Chernobyls!
157
00:11:03,856 --> 00:11:06,016
Go to hell!
158
00:11:06,818 --> 00:11:09,060
I was doing my best to resist her...
159
00:11:09,237 --> 00:11:13,105
...but at dinner, the fortune cookie
predicted doom.
160
00:11:15,786 --> 00:11:18,277
"You will find happiness
with a new love."
161
00:11:18,455 --> 00:11:22,453
-This was a really nice night, Homer.
-Yeah, yeah.
162
00:11:24,587 --> 00:11:28,538
-What's wrong?
-Oh, yeah, like you don't know.
163
00:11:28,716 --> 00:11:31,587
We're gonna have sex.
164
00:11:31,803 --> 00:11:35,968
-Well, we don't have to.
-Yes, we do.
165
00:11:36,141 --> 00:11:37,968
The cookie told me so.
166
00:11:38,185 --> 00:11:41,223
Well, desserts aren't always right.
167
00:11:41,438 --> 00:11:42,981
But they're so sweet.
168
00:11:43,190 --> 00:11:44,851
Homer...
169
00:11:45,651 --> 00:11:47,858
...you know how I feel.
170
00:11:48,071 --> 00:11:50,645
So it's up to you.
171
00:11:51,157 --> 00:11:55,488
Look in your heart.
I think you'll see what you want.
172
00:12:10,470 --> 00:12:12,380
Oh, baby.
173
00:12:13,222 --> 00:12:16,889
This was a wonderful idea, Homie.
174
00:12:17,644 --> 00:12:20,563
-What happened to Mindy?
-Yes, what did happen to her?
175
00:12:20,772 --> 00:12:22,979
She hit the bottle hard
and lost her job.
176
00:12:23,483 --> 00:12:26,936
Good. Does anyone else
have a love story?
177
00:12:27,154 --> 00:12:31,485
Yes, I do. And just like your love stories,
it's tragic and filled with hurt feelings...
178
00:12:31,659 --> 00:12:33,403
...and scars that will never heal.
179
00:12:33,828 --> 00:12:36,533
It started, appropriately enough,
with an innocent boy...
180
00:12:36,748 --> 00:12:39,666
...being embarrassed
on Valentine's Day.
181
00:12:44,256 --> 00:12:46,665
Poor Ralph.
182
00:12:47,509 --> 00:12:49,585
Here you go, Ralph.
183
00:12:51,430 --> 00:12:55,428
-You "choo-choo-choose" me?
-Happy Valentine's.
184
00:12:59,898 --> 00:13:02,271
It was an unusually warm
February 14th...
185
00:13:02,484 --> 00:13:04,975
...so the children walked home
without jackets.
186
00:13:05,195 --> 00:13:08,861
Can I walk you home, valentine?
187
00:13:09,074 --> 00:13:10,569
Sure, I guess.
188
00:13:11,160 --> 00:13:14,446
That valentine sure was funny.
189
00:13:14,622 --> 00:13:16,117
Glad you liked it.
190
00:13:16,332 --> 00:13:22,169
It says "choo-choo-choose" me,
and there's a picture of a train.
191
00:13:22,380 --> 00:13:24,871
Yeah, nice gag.
192
00:13:27,135 --> 00:13:28,761
So...
193
00:13:28,970 --> 00:13:32,388
...do you like stuff?
194
00:13:35,019 --> 00:13:40,476
The doctor said I wouldn't have so many
nosebleeds if I kept my finger out of it.
195
00:13:40,691 --> 00:13:43,361
Well, here's my house.
196
00:13:50,285 --> 00:13:53,323
Oh, no. It's a package from Ralph.
197
00:13:55,374 --> 00:13:58,292
A Malibu Stacy convertible!
198
00:13:58,502 --> 00:14:02,002
"Look in the tunk."
He must mean "trunk."
199
00:14:04,967 --> 00:14:07,756
Tickets to the Krusty Anniversary Show!
200
00:14:08,179 --> 00:14:11,264
It's the Krusty the Clown
29th Anniversary Show!
201
00:14:15,604 --> 00:14:16,980
Thank you, thank you!
202
00:14:17,397 --> 00:14:21,230
-Lisa, you want a bite of my ice cream?
-No, thanks.
203
00:14:21,443 --> 00:14:23,733
Send it this way, boy.
204
00:14:25,531 --> 00:14:28,782
Nothing gets chocolate out. See?
205
00:14:28,951 --> 00:14:31,241
Now, for my favorite part
of the show--
206
00:14:31,454 --> 00:14:34,456
What does that say?
"Talk to the audience"?
207
00:14:34,666 --> 00:14:38,581
Oh, God, this is always death.
All right.
208
00:14:38,795 --> 00:14:41,002
Oh, no. Please don't
show me with Ralph.
209
00:14:42,132 --> 00:14:44,837
-What's your name, son?
-Ralph.
210
00:14:45,052 --> 00:14:48,054
-And is this your girlfriend, Ralph?
-Yes!
211
00:14:48,264 --> 00:14:52,310
I love Lisa Simpson! And when
I grow up, I'm going to marry her.
212
00:14:52,518 --> 00:14:54,808
No!
213
00:14:55,021 --> 00:14:58,308
Now, you listen to me!
I don't like you! I never liked you!
214
00:14:58,525 --> 00:15:00,601
The only reason I gave you
that valentine...
215
00:15:00,819 --> 00:15:02,943
...is because nobody else would!
216
00:15:03,113 --> 00:15:07,278
Watch this. You can actually pinpoint
the second when his heart rips in half.
217
00:15:08,202 --> 00:15:11,987
And now!
218
00:15:15,293 --> 00:15:18,461
Lisa, not all romances
turn out that way.
219
00:15:18,671 --> 00:15:22,457
Bart, do you have a love story
that doesn't end in heartbreak?
220
00:15:22,676 --> 00:15:24,134
Yes, I do.
221
00:15:24,344 --> 00:15:28,046
The only girl I ever loved
invited me up to the tree house.
222
00:15:28,265 --> 00:15:31,267
She had something
very important to tell me.
223
00:15:32,603 --> 00:15:36,020
I'm so happy, I just had to tell someone.
224
00:15:36,232 --> 00:15:37,858
I have a boyfriend.
225
00:15:41,362 --> 00:15:43,486
You won't be needing this.
226
00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:55,491
Wait, that did end in heartbreak.
227
00:15:55,711 --> 00:15:58,167
Thanks for opening up
old wounds, Ma.
228
00:16:08,141 --> 00:16:10,550
Well, as Jerry Lee Lewis would say:
229
00:16:10,769 --> 00:16:14,387
"There's a whole lot of frowning
going on."
230
00:16:18,235 --> 00:16:20,691
Mom, doesn't any love story
have a happy ending?
231
00:16:20,905 --> 00:16:24,986
Of course. Remember when...
232
00:16:25,243 --> 00:16:28,078
...your Aunt Selma got married?
233
00:16:29,622 --> 00:16:32,162
-Good.
-Soon I will kill you.
234
00:16:32,375 --> 00:16:33,871
Wait, wait, that's no good.
235
00:16:34,086 --> 00:16:37,372
I know. Your grandfather, remember?
236
00:16:37,548 --> 00:16:39,209
It started on an outing for dinner.
237
00:16:41,969 --> 00:16:43,962
Say, I've got a neat idea.
238
00:16:44,180 --> 00:16:47,300
Why don't you go in and pick up
my mother, and we'll go out to dinner.
239
00:16:47,517 --> 00:16:50,138
I'll be back in a jiffy.
240
00:16:54,065 --> 00:16:55,394
That's not my mother.
241
00:16:55,609 --> 00:16:58,100
I'll be back in a jiffy.
242
00:16:59,363 --> 00:17:01,818
Can I come too?
243
00:17:07,329 --> 00:17:11,031
They hit it off right away, but there
were rivals for the fair lady's hand.
244
00:17:11,209 --> 00:17:15,456
My favorite song. This is so nice.
245
00:17:15,672 --> 00:17:19,800
I can't remember when I've felt
this young.
246
00:17:20,385 --> 00:17:22,675
I really can't.
247
00:17:25,891 --> 00:17:28,726
Say, sport, mind if I have
the next dance?
248
00:17:28,936 --> 00:17:31,890
What the--? Don't sneak up on a--
Aren't you...?
249
00:17:32,106 --> 00:17:36,900
No need for the blown gasket, Charlie.
I'll have her back in one piece.
250
00:17:49,750 --> 00:17:54,661
But in the end, just when things
[naked worst, true love triumphed.
251
00:17:56,883 --> 00:18:00,252
Do you, Jacqueline Bouvier,
take this man...
252
00:18:00,470 --> 00:18:03,638
...to be your lawfully wedded husband?
253
00:18:03,848 --> 00:18:06,933
Oh, Monty, my favorite song.
How did--?
254
00:18:07,144 --> 00:18:10,014
I specifically requested
no romantic music. What--?
255
00:18:10,230 --> 00:18:12,852
Mrs. Bouvier!
256
00:18:13,067 --> 00:18:15,937
Mrs. Bouvier!
257
00:18:17,446 --> 00:18:20,068
Mrs. Bouvier!
258
00:18:20,283 --> 00:18:23,735
Honey, are you sure you wanna be
Mrs. Montgomery Burns?
259
00:18:23,953 --> 00:18:28,616
Wouldn't you rather be
Mrs. Abraham J. Simpson?
260
00:18:28,792 --> 00:18:30,204
No.
261
00:18:31,586 --> 00:18:34,078
-I don't wanna be either.
-Hot diggety damn!
262
00:18:34,298 --> 00:18:36,457
That's good enough for me.
263
00:18:51,566 --> 00:18:53,393
That doesn't seem like a happy ending.
264
00:18:53,735 --> 00:18:56,855
That seems more like a detached tale
of modern alienation.
265
00:18:57,072 --> 00:19:01,367
I give up. Did anybody learn
anything about love tonight?
266
00:19:01,577 --> 00:19:03,618
Yeah, learned it screws everybody up.
267
00:19:03,829 --> 00:19:07,911
Well, there's that side of it.
But there's also...
268
00:19:08,126 --> 00:19:09,585
Help me out here, Lisa.
269
00:19:09,794 --> 00:19:11,787
Sorry, Mom. I've decided
to save my love...
270
00:19:12,005 --> 00:19:16,170
...for someone who's guaranteed
not to reject me. Soon, Cory, soon.
271
00:19:20,389 --> 00:19:23,426
Well, kids, I tried.
272
00:19:23,642 --> 00:19:26,051
-But maybe you're right.
-Wait a minute, Marge.
273
00:19:26,270 --> 00:19:30,316
Love isn't hopeless. Look, maybe
I'm no expert on the subject...
274
00:19:30,525 --> 00:19:33,443
...but there was one time
I got it right.
275
00:19:33,611 --> 00:19:38,571
Artie, I don't know. It was a
beautiful evening. Let's not ruin it.
276
00:19:38,784 --> 00:19:41,192
-Just this.
-Artie, please.
277
00:19:41,370 --> 00:19:46,365
-Come on, kiss me. Please.
-No, really, I mean it! Now stop it!
278
00:19:48,294 --> 00:19:50,963
-I'm sorry, Marge.
-Take me home.
279
00:20:01,975 --> 00:20:06,306
I'd appreciate it if you didn't
tell anybody about my busy hands.
280
00:20:06,522 --> 00:20:09,773
Not so much for myself,
but I'm so respected...
281
00:20:09,984 --> 00:20:14,195
...it would damage the town
to hear it. Good night.
282
00:20:14,405 --> 00:20:15,983
Yeah, right.
283
00:20:21,246 --> 00:20:25,244
Shut up! I'm over as far as I can go!
284
00:20:25,459 --> 00:20:30,204
All right! All right!
I'll walk in the mud!
285
00:20:31,382 --> 00:20:32,840
-Homer?
-Marge?
286
00:20:33,050 --> 00:20:35,672
-Yeah. You want a ride?
-Sure.
287
00:20:37,722 --> 00:20:42,017
When I got home, I realized
who I should've gone with.
288
00:20:42,227 --> 00:20:44,184
Who?
289
00:20:44,396 --> 00:20:48,892
-Hi, prom date.
-Marge, pour vous.
290
00:20:51,320 --> 00:20:54,903
-Why so glum?
-I got a problem.
291
00:20:56,158 --> 00:21:00,323
Once you stop this car,
I'm gonna hug you and kiss you...
292
00:21:00,538 --> 00:21:02,947
...and I'll never let you go.
293
00:21:03,791 --> 00:21:05,702
Your first kiss.
294
00:21:05,919 --> 00:21:08,125
But not the last.
295
00:21:23,229 --> 00:21:25,602
Homie.
296
00:21:28,860 --> 00:21:33,107
See, kids? That's what I meant
by romance.