1 00:00:33,943 --> 00:00:36,097 This place is looking a little run down. 2 00:00:36,186 --> 00:00:40,271 Yeah, hasn't been the same since they murdered the Mayor's dad here. 3 00:00:45,644 --> 00:00:49,429 Ooh, a J.C. Penney's... used to be here. 4 00:00:50,766 --> 00:00:54,732 Now it's a collection of candle kiosks and Persian CD stores. 5 00:00:54,854 --> 00:00:55,707 How you doing, bro? 6 00:00:55,832 --> 00:00:57,034 We've got the latest by Nabil, 7 00:00:57,151 --> 00:00:59,373 Uma Shang Shang, The Flower Song! 8 00:00:59,785 --> 00:01:00,985 ♪ Uma shang shang ♪ 9 00:01:01,288 --> 00:01:02,508 ♪ Uma shang shang ♪ 10 00:01:02,763 --> 00:01:03,960 ♪ Uma shang shang ♪ 11 00:01:04,173 --> 00:01:06,402 Is like Bruce Springsteen the Boss, ya? 12 00:01:06,577 --> 00:01:07,144 I guess. 13 00:01:07,431 --> 00:01:10,039 If you buy now, I give you, uh, toothache cream. 14 00:01:10,267 --> 00:01:11,103 Toothache cream. 15 00:01:11,246 --> 00:01:11,747 Deal! 16 00:01:11,818 --> 00:01:12,654 We have deal. 17 00:01:16,586 --> 00:01:17,664 Where's the beef? 18 00:01:17,939 --> 00:01:18,804 You ain't so bad. 19 00:01:18,950 --> 00:01:20,137 Where's the beef? 20 00:01:20,312 --> 00:01:21,181 You ain't so bad. 21 00:01:21,384 --> 00:01:22,501 Where's the beef? 22 00:01:22,719 --> 00:01:23,623 You ain't so bad. 23 00:01:23,950 --> 00:01:25,977 These games are so old. 24 00:01:25,994 --> 00:01:27,382 Who got these high scores? 25 00:01:27,394 --> 00:01:28,052 Pilgrims? 26 00:01:28,750 --> 00:01:30,866 Hmm, never saw this one before. 27 00:01:37,703 --> 00:01:38,641 What's going on here? 28 00:01:38,918 --> 00:01:41,507 Am I destroying these triangles or trying to assemble them? 29 00:01:42,431 --> 00:01:43,433 What does this button do? 30 00:01:43,927 --> 00:01:45,409 Now my ship is pooping more triangles! 31 00:01:53,434 --> 00:01:55,102 Ooh, gummy worms! 32 00:01:55,265 --> 00:01:57,403 That candy's been here an awfully long time. 33 00:01:57,409 --> 00:01:59,178 I'd think twice if I were you. 34 00:01:59,452 --> 00:02:01,710 Don't tell me how many times to think! 35 00:02:04,191 --> 00:02:05,871 Mmm... 36 00:02:09,399 --> 00:02:11,119 You are not bringing that thing home. 37 00:02:11,244 --> 00:02:12,330 Then stand back. 38 00:02:20,129 --> 00:02:22,280 This doesn't taste like I thought it would. 39 00:02:28,686 --> 00:02:30,172 Well, if you're through, 40 00:02:30,288 --> 00:02:32,797 let's check out that discount book warehouse. 41 00:02:32,831 --> 00:02:34,540 We already own a book. 42 00:02:37,279 --> 00:02:39,429 Wisconsin From Above. 43 00:02:39,666 --> 00:02:41,274 Veterans' Day Parades. 44 00:02:42,039 --> 00:02:44,629 Ooh, Smiles of Ireland! 45 00:02:45,585 --> 00:02:47,053 Redheaded twins? 46 00:02:47,738 --> 00:02:49,586 Their mother must have her hands full. 47 00:02:51,116 --> 00:02:51,691 Hmm. 48 00:02:53,038 --> 00:02:55,316 Cool, a carpenter's library. 49 00:02:56,625 --> 00:02:59,042 This doesn't look easy, but I'll bet it is. 50 00:02:59,248 --> 00:03:02,592 Well, I like the idea of you as a handyman. 51 00:03:02,677 --> 00:03:05,245 And I love the idea of you reading. 52 00:03:05,422 --> 00:03:06,396 Oh, yeah? 53 00:03:07,433 --> 00:03:09,061 Blah, blah, blah, blah. 54 00:03:09,158 --> 00:03:10,753 Blah, blah, blah, 55 00:03:11,370 --> 00:03:11,947 Ooh 56 00:03:12,012 --> 00:03:12,516 Oh! 57 00:03:12,544 --> 00:03:13,449 Blah, blah, blah, 58 00:03:13,825 --> 00:03:14,872 Blah, blah, blah, 59 00:03:14,926 --> 00:03:16,293 blah, blah, blah... 60 00:03:16,468 --> 00:03:17,478 Okay, now you do me. 61 00:03:18,752 --> 00:03:20,242 I never want to go back to that mall. 62 00:03:20,297 --> 00:03:22,043 There were eels in the photo booth. 63 00:03:23,190 --> 00:03:24,758 Eww! 64 00:03:26,449 --> 00:03:28,257 Bart, here's a letter from your school. 65 00:03:28,571 --> 00:03:30,909 A fire? I didn't start a fire in the teachers' lounge. 66 00:03:31,007 --> 00:03:32,284 I mean, what fire? 67 00:03:32,327 --> 00:03:35,377 I mean, a letter from school? Please elaborate. 68 00:03:35,674 --> 00:03:39,495 Someone at your school has a life-threatening peanut allergy. 69 00:03:39,660 --> 00:03:40,947 Cool! Who is it? 70 00:03:41,113 --> 00:03:42,553 The letter doesn't say. 71 00:03:42,677 --> 00:03:44,506 But from now on, no peanut products 72 00:03:44,518 --> 00:03:46,298 are allowed on school property. 73 00:03:46,515 --> 00:03:47,757 Hmm, let's see what you've got. 74 00:03:48,245 --> 00:03:49,746 Peanut butter and jelly sandwich, 75 00:03:50,051 --> 00:03:51,926 trail mix, starring peanuts. 76 00:03:52,233 --> 00:03:54,461 Good grief, more peanuts! 77 00:04:01,690 --> 00:04:04,561 Harley Mozell is hit from behind by J.T. Delacroix! 78 00:04:04,684 --> 00:04:06,473 And Earl Tilleson! 79 00:04:06,508 --> 00:04:08,197 Oh, and Buddy Rollette! 80 00:04:08,354 --> 00:04:10,580 And the Pecker Brothers, Danny and Dell! 81 00:04:10,997 --> 00:04:12,495 And the ol' Grizzly himself... 82 00:04:12,738 --> 00:04:14,328 Weasel Johnson Junior! 83 00:04:14,332 --> 00:04:15,652 Look at that carnage. 84 00:04:15,794 --> 00:04:17,753 We are worse than the ancient Romans! 85 00:04:18,620 --> 00:04:20,560 Homie, don't you want to build something 86 00:04:20,565 --> 00:04:22,133 with your new fix-it books? 87 00:04:22,388 --> 00:04:23,626 I did. I made a foot rest. 88 00:04:25,122 --> 00:04:27,512 Oh, don't you have any follow-through on anything? 89 00:04:27,587 --> 00:04:29,824 What's the point? We're all slowly dying. 90 00:04:34,310 --> 00:04:37,550 Oh, the floorboard broke my nightstand. 91 00:04:40,980 --> 00:04:42,286 Hmm... 92 00:04:43,494 --> 00:04:44,692 Hmm... 93 00:04:48,442 --> 00:04:49,170 I did it! 94 00:04:49,844 --> 00:04:52,083 What's that strange feeling? 95 00:04:52,942 --> 00:04:54,759 It's "of accomplishment"! 96 00:05:07,537 --> 00:05:09,494 Wow, Mom, you made all this? 97 00:05:09,772 --> 00:05:11,528 It's like you're the Jesus of carpentry. 98 00:05:11,643 --> 00:05:14,503 Aww, what a sweet blasphemy. 99 00:05:14,589 --> 00:05:16,246 This is a valuable skill. 100 00:05:16,325 --> 00:05:18,834 People might even pay you to build things for them. 101 00:05:18,936 --> 00:05:21,346 I could start my own carpentry business. 102 00:05:21,524 --> 00:05:24,934 I'm already arranging the clip art for the letterhead in my mind. 103 00:05:29,536 --> 00:05:30,082 Perfect! 104 00:05:32,821 --> 00:05:33,820 Can I help you, Miss? 105 00:05:33,985 --> 00:05:35,652 I'm here to fix your bookcase. 106 00:05:35,808 --> 00:05:37,164 You answered my flyer. 107 00:05:37,529 --> 00:05:38,457 Hmm, yeah. 108 00:05:38,771 --> 00:05:39,940 And you're the carpenter? 109 00:05:40,007 --> 00:05:40,652 That's right. 110 00:05:40,806 --> 00:05:43,826 I see. Not that I have anything against female carpenters, 111 00:05:43,924 --> 00:05:48,333 but I have some pictures hanging that you might find, um... unsavory. 112 00:05:48,349 --> 00:05:48,850 Good-bye. 113 00:05:50,723 --> 00:05:53,373 A lady carpenter? I don't know. 114 00:05:53,495 --> 00:05:56,127 What if you get pregnant and I'm left with half a hot tub? 115 00:05:56,346 --> 00:05:58,354 And don't tell me you're infertile. 116 00:05:58,508 --> 00:06:00,218 I ain't falling for that again. 117 00:06:03,085 --> 00:06:04,973 It's so unfair. 118 00:06:05,100 --> 00:06:07,198 I'm as handy as any man. 119 00:06:07,263 --> 00:06:08,660 You sure are, sweetie. 120 00:06:08,825 --> 00:06:10,172 I love this bed you made. 121 00:06:11,983 --> 00:06:14,361 I guess people just expect their carpenter 122 00:06:14,367 --> 00:06:17,557 to be some fat guy with his butt crack showing. 123 00:06:24,776 --> 00:06:28,605 Homer, your butt just gave me a brilliant idea! 124 00:06:28,951 --> 00:06:29,850 Yep, it'll do that. 125 00:06:32,799 --> 00:06:35,098 "Simpsons Manly-Man Handyman" at your service. 126 00:06:35,255 --> 00:06:36,671 Ah, superlative! 127 00:06:36,756 --> 00:06:40,780 Please install a doggie door sized for a teacup poodle. 128 00:06:40,972 --> 00:06:42,780 No problem. 129 00:06:42,927 --> 00:06:47,481 Why don't you go inside and stir your flubber while I get to work? 130 00:06:49,248 --> 00:06:51,347 Marge, the coast is clear. 131 00:06:57,564 --> 00:07:00,463 I'm terribly sorry. I thought I heard the sound of a woman measuring. 132 00:07:00,629 --> 00:07:02,398 Oh, uh, that was me. 133 00:07:02,482 --> 00:07:03,801 You know that old saying: 134 00:07:04,046 --> 00:07:06,435 "Measure like a girl, hammer like a guy." 135 00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:09,029 Yes, but you're holding your hammer backwards. 136 00:07:09,264 --> 00:07:10,821 Oh, uh... you know what they say, 137 00:07:10,956 --> 00:07:12,599 "Hammer with the wood and it's all good." 138 00:07:12,770 --> 00:07:14,717 It's all good. 139 00:07:15,454 --> 00:07:16,511 All right, then. 140 00:07:25,191 --> 00:07:28,664 A dash of glue, a turn of screw, 141 00:07:28,758 --> 00:07:32,679 and a gazebo's built that's perfect for two... or more. 142 00:07:33,737 --> 00:07:34,953 Uh-oh, switch! 143 00:07:36,431 --> 00:07:38,052 Eh... eh... eh! 144 00:07:38,214 --> 00:07:39,532 And... done! 145 00:07:39,689 --> 00:07:40,815 Mm-mmm! 146 00:07:40,860 --> 00:07:42,668 Simpson, you're a master craftsman. 147 00:07:42,743 --> 00:07:44,703 Listen, what would you say... 148 00:07:44,758 --> 00:07:47,157 if I told you a woman did most of the work? 149 00:07:47,511 --> 00:07:50,190 I'd have this gazebo torn down and built into a coffin... 150 00:07:50,457 --> 00:07:51,498 for your manhood. 151 00:07:52,361 --> 00:07:55,030 Why did my hypothetical scenario scare you so? 152 00:07:55,224 --> 00:07:59,707 Uh, like all manly men, I have a vivid imagination. 153 00:08:00,096 --> 00:08:00,801 Well said. 154 00:08:01,014 --> 00:08:02,537 Let's take off our shirts and wrestle. 155 00:08:09,330 --> 00:08:14,306 Okay, give me all your peanuts, Goobers, and Fluffer Nutters. 156 00:08:14,508 --> 00:08:17,549 Oh, why should we have to give up our salty snacks 157 00:08:17,557 --> 00:08:19,873 just to keep one allergic kid from exploding? 158 00:08:20,031 --> 00:08:21,806 Who is this selfish jerk anyway? 159 00:08:22,013 --> 00:08:23,743 It's not me, I swear. 160 00:08:23,807 --> 00:08:29,273 I'm only allergic to honey, wheat, dairy, non-dairy, and my own tears. 161 00:08:30,911 --> 00:08:31,764 Oh, no. 162 00:08:32,003 --> 00:08:33,910 Call my allergist... 163 00:08:34,045 --> 00:08:35,523 and my optometrist. 164 00:08:37,121 --> 00:08:39,708 Willie, you can tell me. 165 00:08:39,917 --> 00:08:42,454 Who's the mystery wuss who can't eat peanuts? 166 00:08:42,488 --> 00:08:44,467 I'll never say his name. 167 00:08:44,652 --> 00:08:45,662 "His," eh? 168 00:08:45,807 --> 00:08:47,903 Hmm, so it's a dude. 169 00:08:48,070 --> 00:08:49,778 Who says it's a dude? 170 00:08:50,005 --> 00:08:53,456 A principal can be a manor a woman these days. 171 00:08:53,649 --> 00:08:54,756 Hmm. 172 00:08:57,436 --> 00:08:59,266 I've taken all the peanut products. 173 00:08:59,609 --> 00:09:03,931 Just like the English took our sheep and our women in 1291. 174 00:09:04,208 --> 00:09:07,198 Then, they sent them back, which was worse! 175 00:09:07,394 --> 00:09:10,032 Yes, yes, every day we go through this. 176 00:09:10,070 --> 00:09:12,348 Why don't you just incinerate the contraband? 177 00:09:12,432 --> 00:09:15,364 Will do, but first, Willie gets his gob-full. 178 00:09:18,746 --> 00:09:20,030 Careful with those peanut crumbs! 179 00:09:20,245 --> 00:09:22,414 My allergy is so sensitive, a single molecule 180 00:09:22,429 --> 00:09:25,120 would make my throat close like a museum at 4:45. 181 00:09:29,935 --> 00:09:31,032 Hello, Marge. 182 00:09:31,135 --> 00:09:33,635 Picking up supplies for Handy Homer? 183 00:09:33,739 --> 00:09:36,439 It must feel good to know that you're "helping." 184 00:09:36,546 --> 00:09:40,147 - Oh, I help more than you might think. - Sure you do. 185 00:09:40,253 --> 00:09:43,602 You provide food and sexual release for your handy husband. 186 00:09:44,459 --> 00:09:46,958 Looks like you broke something. Better call Homer! 187 00:09:51,252 --> 00:09:54,974 Of course I can make a credenza, what ever that is. 188 00:09:55,079 --> 00:09:58,231 Just give all the details to my secretary Shirley. 189 00:09:59,188 --> 00:10:00,182 This is Shirley. 190 00:10:00,238 --> 00:10:02,888 Yes, fine, he'll be there tomorrow. Good-bye. 191 00:10:03,392 --> 00:10:05,393 That Shirley is quite a gal. 192 00:10:05,397 --> 00:10:06,893 We should fix her up with Barney. 193 00:10:07,001 --> 00:10:07,898 Homie... 194 00:10:07,903 --> 00:10:11,103 I think you're taking a little too much credit for my work. 195 00:10:11,209 --> 00:10:12,705 I mean, look at your t-shirt! 196 00:10:15,114 --> 00:10:19,618 Marge, giving me credit was your idea. Now, could you rub my butt? 197 00:10:19,724 --> 00:10:22,423 I sat on it so much it's a little sore. 198 00:10:22,427 --> 00:10:23,426 Oh...! 199 00:10:23,430 --> 00:10:25,079 Look, I'm sorry you're upset, 200 00:10:25,083 --> 00:10:29,935 but if we tell the truth now, I'll be humiliated in front of the whole town. 201 00:10:29,941 --> 00:10:32,041 Then you won't be married to a man. 202 00:10:32,143 --> 00:10:34,844 You'll be married to some kind of gay jelly fish, 203 00:10:34,849 --> 00:10:39,254 floating outside the Florida Keys, cruising for rich snorkelers. 204 00:10:39,357 --> 00:10:43,158 - You don't want that. - I guess I don't. 205 00:10:51,781 --> 00:10:54,281 Bart, Skinner's going to be really mad at you. 206 00:10:54,383 --> 00:10:58,488 Yes, you might say he'll "blow up". 207 00:11:00,497 --> 00:11:03,297 What ever. I've got some paper to mâché. 208 00:11:07,006 --> 00:11:08,906 Simpson! Report to detention at once. 209 00:11:09,260 --> 00:11:11,829 Ah, I'm not a big fan of detention. 210 00:11:11,837 --> 00:11:14,215 You might say it drives me nuts. 211 00:11:15,671 --> 00:11:16,768 My allergen. 212 00:11:17,925 --> 00:11:23,682 ♪ Beat on the brat, at the brat ♪ ♪ Beat on the brat with a baseball bat ♪ 213 00:11:23,738 --> 00:11:26,988 ♪ Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh-oh ♪ 214 00:11:29,849 --> 00:11:33,250 ♪ Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh-oh... ♪ 215 00:11:34,457 --> 00:11:37,156 I'm a cootie eater. I've been one all my life. 216 00:11:37,359 --> 00:11:40,011 I like the cooties so much, I have a cootie wife. 217 00:11:44,775 --> 00:11:49,727 - Why does Lenny need a windmill, anyway? - Ah, he wants to grind his own corn. 218 00:11:49,734 --> 00:11:53,685 Maybe finally shut him up about the high price of cornmeal. 219 00:11:54,019 --> 00:11:55,036 Oh, switch. 220 00:11:55,595 --> 00:11:57,891 Oh, yeah, switch, switch, switch. 221 00:11:58,299 --> 00:12:00,097 Wow, great job, Homer. 222 00:12:00,152 --> 00:12:02,918 Yeah, and to think you built this whole thing with your own two hands. 223 00:12:03,607 --> 00:12:05,605 Who do you think would help me, my wife? 224 00:12:05,952 --> 00:12:08,409 Your wife? Give me a break. 225 00:12:08,467 --> 00:12:11,214 The only thing women can build is credit card debt. 226 00:12:13,324 --> 00:12:14,323 Credit card debt. 227 00:12:15,629 --> 00:12:17,826 Homer, did you leave a powerdrill on in your toolbox? 228 00:12:17,834 --> 00:12:18,980 It's making this horrible noise. 229 00:12:19,036 --> 00:12:20,030 Yeah, I hear it, too. 230 00:12:20,236 --> 00:12:22,785 Maybe we cover up by singing a fun song. 231 00:12:22,793 --> 00:12:25,792 ♪ We will, we will rock you ♪ 232 00:12:28,752 --> 00:12:32,054 ♪ We will, we will rock you ♪ 233 00:12:35,164 --> 00:12:36,662 ♪ Buddy, you're the boy make a big noise ♪ 234 00:12:36,666 --> 00:12:39,615 ♪ Playin' in the street ♪ ♪ gonna be a big man some day... ♪ 235 00:12:41,373 --> 00:12:44,526 I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, infinity. 236 00:12:44,580 --> 00:12:47,432 I never expected them to climb on the cabinet 237 00:12:47,437 --> 00:12:49,685 and ride it down the biggest hill in town. 238 00:12:51,994 --> 00:12:54,494 Homer, it's time people knew the truth. 239 00:12:54,498 --> 00:12:57,649 I'm doing the work and I want the credit. 240 00:12:57,702 --> 00:13:00,004 Look, I understand that you're mad. 241 00:13:00,107 --> 00:13:02,135 Which makes now the perfect time to tell you, 242 00:13:02,141 --> 00:13:05,414 the mayor's hired to fix the old Springfield roller coaster. 243 00:13:08,725 --> 00:13:11,722 By the way, nice job installing this wall-chart bracket. 244 00:13:12,028 --> 00:13:14,379 If the kids ask, I did it. 245 00:13:15,136 --> 00:13:18,085 You're gonna have fix that roller coaster yourself, 246 00:13:18,138 --> 00:13:21,743 because I quit, and I'm taking this with me! 247 00:13:25,552 --> 00:13:27,751 Darn these counter sunk molly clamps. 248 00:13:32,366 --> 00:13:34,414 This is not going to end well. 249 00:13:36,683 --> 00:13:40,276 Now as I see it, the problem with this roller coaster 250 00:13:40,280 --> 00:13:43,078 is there are too many boring going-up parts. 251 00:13:43,184 --> 00:13:46,387 We need to replace them with kick-ass going-down parts. 252 00:13:46,943 --> 00:13:48,287 Oh, yeah, going-downparts. 253 00:13:48,796 --> 00:13:51,295 Uh, Mr. Simpson, shouldn't we begin by securing the struts? 254 00:13:51,801 --> 00:13:52,795 Hmm... 255 00:13:52,901 --> 00:13:55,251 Let me mull that over. 256 00:13:59,011 --> 00:14:02,814 What are struts?! Oh, I don't know. 257 00:14:05,726 --> 00:14:08,022 Anything about struts. 258 00:14:09,182 --> 00:14:11,629 This guy's all bubble and no level. 259 00:14:11,734 --> 00:14:14,036 So what? He's paying us 50 grand. 260 00:14:14,138 --> 00:14:16,537 And I promised these guys money I don't have! 261 00:14:16,943 --> 00:14:19,443 And they're gonna be so mad! 262 00:14:21,954 --> 00:14:23,553 Ah, let's go home. 263 00:14:25,859 --> 00:14:29,463 Maybe I can sneak home without them seeing me. 264 00:14:44,692 --> 00:14:46,894 Are you ready to be lightly assaulted? 265 00:14:54,562 --> 00:14:56,909 Good morning. 266 00:14:58,269 --> 00:14:59,716 I brought you breakfast in bed. 267 00:15:02,774 --> 00:15:03,771 Eat it. 268 00:15:11,139 --> 00:15:13,439 Excuse me. I'm supposed to stand in your store window 269 00:15:13,443 --> 00:15:15,945 and breast-feed Bilbo Baggins. 270 00:15:16,198 --> 00:15:19,249 Your cowering suggests that Bart has found your kryptonite. 271 00:15:19,257 --> 00:15:20,602 Kryptonite? What's that? 272 00:15:20,707 --> 00:15:22,404 The "ite" suffix suggests a mineral. 273 00:15:22,813 --> 00:15:25,018 I do not know whether to laugh or cry at your ignorance. 274 00:15:25,064 --> 00:15:26,262 I shall laugh. Ha-ha! 275 00:15:26,568 --> 00:15:29,067 Kryptonite is Superman's greatest weakness. 276 00:15:29,725 --> 00:15:33,174 Wait, maybe Bart has a kryptonite! 277 00:15:33,282 --> 00:15:34,178 Perhaps. 278 00:15:34,181 --> 00:15:36,482 But for now, you may suckle your Baggins. 279 00:15:48,008 --> 00:15:49,603 I've got you now, Bart. 280 00:16:07,039 --> 00:16:08,339 Dad, here's a thought: 281 00:16:08,341 --> 00:16:11,744 If you just gave mom credit, maybe she could help you. 282 00:16:11,748 --> 00:16:13,446 Sweetie, you don't understand. 283 00:16:13,651 --> 00:16:18,054 If I can do this myself, then all those lies I told will be true. 284 00:16:18,260 --> 00:16:20,411 Don't you want Daddy's lies to be true? 285 00:16:20,663 --> 00:16:23,413 I'd like a daddy who lived in the real world. 286 00:16:23,419 --> 00:16:28,575 To Daddy, the real world gets fainter and fainter every day. 287 00:16:29,982 --> 00:16:31,580 Good morning, Seymour. 288 00:16:31,786 --> 00:16:35,386 You may be wondering what I'm doing with this hat full of maggots. 289 00:16:35,489 --> 00:16:37,238 Actually, I'm not wondering at all. 290 00:16:41,201 --> 00:16:44,201 Simpson, you've been waving your nuts in my face for too long. 291 00:16:44,205 --> 00:16:46,705 - Eat shrimp and die! - No! I'm allergic! 292 00:16:48,065 --> 00:16:50,864 Stick-on-stick. Just like the knights of old. 293 00:16:51,117 --> 00:16:53,166 No one teaches me history! 294 00:17:38,302 --> 00:17:39,498 - Peanut?! - Shrimp?! 295 00:17:43,662 --> 00:17:45,540 If either of us falls in, we're doomed! 296 00:17:45,917 --> 00:17:47,914 Kids don't die! 297 00:17:52,478 --> 00:17:58,335 - I... was... El Barto. - No...! 298 00:18:00,593 --> 00:18:03,641 Welcome, ladies and gentlemen, honored guests 299 00:18:03,847 --> 00:18:06,646 and out-of-town roller coaster weirdos. 300 00:18:10,261 --> 00:18:12,409 Your father's finally gonna get exposed 301 00:18:12,414 --> 00:18:14,912 as the credit-stealing fraud he is! 302 00:18:20,877 --> 00:18:21,876 Perfect. 303 00:18:22,079 --> 00:18:25,182 I give you... the Zoominator! 304 00:18:27,189 --> 00:18:30,040 And now to get stinking drunk! 305 00:18:38,308 --> 00:18:39,805 I'm not getting married on that! 306 00:18:39,812 --> 00:18:42,963 You won't get married on Colossus, you won't get married on The Zoominator, 307 00:18:42,969 --> 00:18:44,864 you won't get married on The Pharaoh's Curse. 308 00:18:45,072 --> 00:18:48,121 - Just say it. it's me! - Oh, no, baby, no! 309 00:18:48,429 --> 00:18:54,333 Dad! Put aside your selfish male ego and tell the truth! 310 00:18:54,339 --> 00:18:56,685 Sure, I'll tell them the truth. 311 00:18:56,793 --> 00:18:57,789 The truth is... 312 00:18:58,597 --> 00:19:01,845 that I'm perfect and everything I touch is perfect! 313 00:19:03,753 --> 00:19:05,755 Oh, my God, he'll kill himself! 314 00:19:06,260 --> 00:19:09,812 He'll never hear me say "I told you so!" 315 00:19:10,515 --> 00:19:12,314 I never felt safer! 316 00:19:20,833 --> 00:19:24,686 Oh, why must we preserve America's historic roller coasters? 317 00:19:43,176 --> 00:19:44,223 Thank you, honey! 318 00:19:44,727 --> 00:19:45,726 Everyone! 319 00:19:45,729 --> 00:19:48,228 My stupid male pride made me lie to you. 320 00:19:48,232 --> 00:19:50,517 Everything I claimed... I did was actually built by Marge! 321 00:19:58,951 --> 00:20:01,453 Homer, I was pretty upset with you, 322 00:20:01,458 --> 00:20:06,663 but in the end, I... I... I beam! 323 00:20:13,878 --> 00:20:15,779 Avenge... me. 324 00:20:20,490 --> 00:20:24,495 Marge, I realized something when I was trapped under all that rubble: 325 00:20:24,499 --> 00:20:27,598 Marriage is the real roller coaster. 326 00:20:27,702 --> 00:20:30,455 I'm just glad I have you as my safety bar. 327 00:20:30,608 --> 00:20:34,112 Oh, I forgive you, my darling. Get well. 328 00:20:35,568 --> 00:20:39,819 As for you, young man, the next time you save your principal, 329 00:20:39,825 --> 00:20:41,926 try not to risk your own life. 330 00:20:42,580 --> 00:20:44,728 What kind of lies are you feeding her, Simpson? 331 00:20:44,803 --> 00:20:46,823 Mind your own beeswax! 332 00:20:55,151 --> 00:20:57,052 I'm gonna go look at the new babies.